Comedy of the Week - The Skewer: Hard Labour

Episode Date: May 18, 2026

Streeting wants in and Starmer styles it out. The multi-award-winning satire is back as Jon Holmes mashes up the news with pop-culture to create a current affairs satirical comedy concept album. Producer: Jon Holmes An unusual production for BBC Radio 4

This podcast includes strong language. The first ballot box has just arrived. Ballot boxes are in. All ballot boxes are now in. Oh, what's in the box? The first ballot box verdict on Keir Stalmers' government. Where do we start? What's in the fucking box?

I mean, it looks like a red wall wipeout. Labor has suffered huge losses. No! The government has stumbled from one disastrous policy decision to another. No! And they are paying the price. Two-party politics is not just dying. It is dead.

It's buried. That's not true. That's not true. I think it'd be gone by Midsummer. You lie! You're a fucking liar! Shut up! A Labour MP. Catherine West. I was told the BBC she will launch a leadership challenge against Secere Starmor if no other rivals come forward. He didn't know.

No, no. West Streeting arrived in Downing Street and then left within 17 minutes. Yeah, that's right you better walk away. I don't walk away, because I'm going to burn this motherfucker down. West Streeting's allies are telling us he's planning on challenging the Prime Minister. You disloyal, fool-ass, bitch-made punk. And that challenge may come as soon as tomorrow.

You the fuck you think you fucking win. In a speech in London, Secir vowed to fight anyone running to replace him. I'm the man up in this speech. And said that he would prove the doubt is wrong. I run shit here. You just live here. He told a room full of labor loyalists. King Kong ain't got shit on me.

party started the Labour Party. And then we've got the serious threat that will be another Kea Stormer that perhaps could pain the Labour Party forever. 87 Labour MP are to be released across Exmoor National Park from this summer, but the sheep farmer in Exmoor is concerned that they could prey on lambs. We don't want to reach a situation where the genie is out the bottle, and we're experiencing loss are going to be pretty distressive.

Zach Polanski may have failed to pay council tax on a houseboat in London. The boats, the boats, the boats, something doesn't add up. Mr. Polanski says he only used the boat occasionally and lived elsewhere in London. Like a portion. West Ham had a 95th minute equaliser ruled out by VAR.

The decision took four minutes and 11 seconds to come. Could it be that you have been looking too long? And it could have season-defining consequences. Through your marvellous tube. Gordon Brown now. brought back in to government by Keir Starma. Gordon's alive! The King's speech featured a guest performance by Boy George.

The Prime Minister is Akir Starmer. The King's speech, where the government sets out its priorities, happening on the same day that the Labour Party is pulling itself apart. Oh, wasn't that a dainty dish to set before the King? I'm pleased to introduce the Prime Minister and the leader of our party, Kea Starmer. Mr Stalmers. The election results last week were tough.

Let us not be down on it. I have a responsibility. All responsibility. I will set a new direction for Britain. Right. This calls for me to discuss. Our response this time must be different. New motion.

Completely new motion. We cannot win as a weaker version of reform or the Greens. I agree. It's action that counts, not words, and we need action now. We can only win as a stronger version of Labour. You're right. We can sit around here. all day talking passing resolutions making clever speeches truth be told i'm not sure that they believe that we care we got to get up off our asses and stop just talking about it here for the british people

tired of a status quo that has failed them so let's just stop gabbing on about change cannot come quickly enough once the vote would be taken obviously that's the place that is the layback Thank you very much. And now for something completely different. Hi, I'm Jane MacDonald. Did someone mention cruise? Passengers have been evacuated from the cruise ship hit by the hantavirus outbreak.

I caught the cruising bug more than 20 years ago. Symptoms can take one to eight weeks to show and can feel like mild flu. I think I'm going to have a heart attack. But phase two can lead to lung damage. This is completely taking my breath away. Dusts. up into the air and people inhale it.

It's mice and rat droppings and urine. So why if I'm having a cocktail as well? The cruise ship at the centre of the outbreak was allowed to dock in Spain. Where Manuel comes from are faulty towers. Passengers will start being transferred home to self-isolate for 42 days. After that, I really do need to go another lie down.

Lie-down. Labor are wiped out by reform in many of their most traditional areas. Extraordinary. The best is yet to come. But this story is not you. One thing that consistently I get in the street from people,

especially from women actually, is please save us. Please save us. A complete reshaping of British politics. Storbed it. Unstopping. Because nothing says anti-establishment by hoovering up disgraced Tories, taking money from foreign-based billionaires

and refusing to answer questions about the most basic requirements of transparency and integrity. We are a fun party. The Parliamentary Standards Commissioner has decided to launch an inquiry into the Leader of Reform UK Nigel Farage. Once there was a girl who was invisible. Please welcome the Leader of Conservative Party, Femi Payton. No one can see her. Conservatives feel like little more than an extra. And no one could hear her.

The Conservatives are coming back. Her invisibility. The Tories, we haven't really talked about them yet. It was simply a fact she had to live with. Does that imply that most people think the Tories are a bit irrelevant these days? What's happening? Why are you all pretending I'm not here? I'm very proud of how we have done. The Tories are dead.

A ghost. We are the only serious alternative to labour. I'm still invisible. We are coming back to deliver a stronger economy. I didn't want to accept it. We're coming back to deliver a stronger country. And we are coming back to get Britain working again. But I had disappeared.

More Elchemy Baden on. From sight. Standing at the dispatch box. And from memory. It'll look like a bit of an anomaly for the next three years. The shadow girl. I just don't think about the toys anymore because they're just not relevant to our lives anymore. They don't.

They don't. Exist. We turned out of that big new release of UFO documents. President Trump telling the public to have fun deciding for itself what's going on. Give them the old razzle dazzle. I recently directed the second. Equitary of War to begin releasing government files relating to UFOs. Razzle dazzled dazzling.

Unexplained aerial. Connemon. Give them the old pocus, pocus. That's right. Is there anything there or is this a distraction to what is going on overseas? What if you hinge is all our rush? I don't know if I am. But if in fact you're just disgusting.

You'll figure it up. Let me know. Razzle dazzle, and they'll never get. And they'll never get wise. Sergey! Wacky, wiki, oh. There are reports coming out of Russia of a plot to oust Vladimir Putin. Don't mind that. Sergei Shogu is the man named behind the conspiracy.

Sergei is having little joke with me. The two used to be very close friends. He was a loyal ally. The two would actually go on fishing trips together. This is a lack, eh, Sergei. And it would often post quite macho, topless, photos of them. Just you and me, but there is dark cloud. Everyone who could be suspected as a person who can challenge Putin would be eliminated. Okay, Sergei, you're working hard and you are feeling the stress. You should be tech easy. There's been a systematic

purging of Shoygu's allies. High on the roof of presidential palace in center of Moscow. Oh man, it falls over. It's a good story. Putin is a sharp man, particularly when it comes to kind of the cloak and dagger stuff So now we fix problems U.S.S. Secretary of State Marco Rubio spoke to reporters. I want to reiterate the point. The message to Iran they should check themselves before they wrecked

themselves. Check themselves before you wreck yourself. They should check themselves before they wreck yourself. You better check yourself for you wreck yourself because I'm bad for your health. At least 100 healthcare facilities had come under attack. I come real stoke dropping bombs on your mom.

More than 3,000 people have been killed in Iran since the conflict began. They should check themselves before they wreck themselves. Check themselves before they wreck themselves. First you want to step to me. Now you're asking for the deputy. Their leaders are all gone. The next set of leaders are all gone.

They should check themselves before they wreck themselves. President Trump's advisors are increasingly worried that Republicans will pay a political price for the rising fuel costs. They should check themselves before they wreck themselves. Big dicks in your ass is bad for your hell. The ongoing Israeli-American war on Iran is boiling down to one key place. Who can take the pain the longest? Richard Tice,

one of your counselors suggested melting Nigerians to fill potholes. Yeah, the reality is we've had more potholes than anybody else. We're sick of it. We've got an extra 14 potholes in London. in London. That's what people are really concerned about. No, do you condemn those remarks? You keep trying to smear us and sneer us.

It's not a smear. I condemn anything that is wrong. But many voters have concerns about that person who's just been elected who has revealed to be offensive. Yeah, obviously, but voters are furious with the potholes in gateshead. Melting Nigerians to fill pot holes. No point repeating it.

Just remember voters want more reform, more success and no, pop holes, holes, holes, holes. Imagine you could travel back in time. On Downing Street, Labour's past. Gordon Brown back for the first time in 16 years. To a time long before manner.

The Prime Minister's decision to bring Gordon Brown and Harriet Harmon back into government. This is a world ruled by dinosaurs. Two major big beasts of the Labour Party brought back into government. But these ancient creatures have had their day. There is a bafflement that when the public is crying out for change and acceleration in the face of church. They're seeing two figures who were in government three decades ago brought back.

Once there were many different varieties of these powerful creatures. Is you going to bring in Tony Blair to feed Larry the cat? And it will take them some time to realize their work is in vain. A desperate bid to save his skin. And now the real test for survival begins. Let me be clear, these are really tough results.

One single moment your whole life can turn around. And the voters have sent out. a message. Well feels like it's caved in proper sorry frown. I think it's absolutely clear that the electorate are fed up with labour. By your eyes made, I know it's hard to take, but her mind has been made. I know I have my doubt. Please let me show you where we could only just be for us. And I know I need to prove them wrong, and I will. I can change and I can grow or we could adjust. We are, they seem, dangerous, a plume. I know you want to make. I know. Make us see how much this thing hurts.

This hurts not just because Labor has done bad. And I'm just standing there. But because if we don't get this right, our country will go down. Everything's just gone. A very dark part. I've got nothing. Absolutely nothing. Alexa.

Who twisted the skewer? The skewer was twisted by John Holmes, Katie Sayer, Alice Wright, Helen Brooks, Dave Wall, Dan Phillips, David Rifkin, Uber, Moor, Hilsware, and Terry. Turn signed. Additional material. Ellie Hayward, Vivian Hopley, Jone, Jade Gubby, Grace Millie, Ollie, Nathan, Callie, Alan Bainbridge, Hemrick Person, Adrian Fiss and John Upton. The producer was John Holmes. The Secure was an unusual production for BBC Radio 4 and BBC Sounds.

There was a five-year term I was elected to do. I intend to see that through. I'm not going to fucking just fucking leave it all now, because you said it'd be forever and that was your vow. I'm not going to sugarcate it. Please, please, beg, please. We need to convince people that things can and will get better. I'm right, eyes, mate.

I know you want to make the sea how much this pain hurt. And I'm not going to walk away. But you've got to walk away now. Hello, this is John Holmes. Thank you for listening to Comedy of the Week. If you'd like to hear more episodes of The Skewer, you can search for it where else on BBC Sounds. Could you talk about being invisible or double denim?

Who knows what's next on the new series of Just a Minute? Belting out a rendition of Godabat. Whatever the topic, our panel has just a minute to speak, without hesitation, deviation or repetition. Join Zoe Lyons, Desiree Birch, Paul Merton, and many more for the new series of just a minute with me, Super Kids. It's funny because it's true. Listen on Radio 4,

and the full box set is available now on. BBC Sounds.