Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend - Eric Andre

Episode Date: May 3, 2021

Comedian Eric Andre is Conan O’Brien’s friend, and he feels titillated by that. Eric sits down with Conan to talk about showcasing unity and an uplifting spirit with his new film Bad Trip, how street pranks can bring out the best of humanity, and the ways in which performing comedy can mess with one’s head. Later, Conan gives us live updates on his reaction to his second vaccine shot. Got a question for Conan? Call our voicemail: [phone].For Conan videos, tour dates and more visit TeamCoco.com.

Hi, my name is Eric Andre. I am Conan O'Brien's friend, and I feel titillated by that. Goosebumps. My areolas are rock hard. If I had a heavy sweater on a hanger, could I hang it on one of your areolas? Yes, you can. Fall is here, hear the yell, back to school, ring the bell, brand new shoes, walking blues, climb the fence, books and pens. I can tell that we are gonna be friends. I can tell that we are gonna be friends. Hello and welcome to Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend. What you're hearing now is I think our third or fourth attempt to start the show. I won't get into what happened, but we just kept stumbling and bumbling, and we?

Well, first of all, Sona, okay, not you, Matt, okay, not you, but we tried to take where Sona went down a weird road. We had to quickly stop it. Then I had a small, I'm just gonna say it was an aneurysm. Treatable. Treatable if there's emergency surgery, very quickly, whatever. Usually, I swear to God, we start this show and we just go, baby, and what you hear is what you get. Wait, that doesn't make sense, because if you heard it, you already got it. Start again. No, we're not starting again. We're gonna plow ahead. People need to know if nothing else were honest. So we've never, ever had three attempts to get a top of the show. No.

And today we did. And I'm saying, because there are a lot of people out there that think, how does Conan do it? That's just incredible. He must be juicing. Oh my God. What kind of mind is it? Can we get a CAT scan or an MRI? Can we see what this mind looks like? You know, whatever. All this stuff they did with Einstein. You know, can we study this? What I'm saying is that I'm trying to be open with you and say, yes, even I, even I, and if I can make a mistake, it's okay that you make a lot of them too, people. Is that endearing me to my crowd? What do you think? I don't know. I feel like you lost him when you compared yourself to Einstein. Well, there are similarities. Oh, are there?

Yes. I also, I also have had some of my best ideas while working in a patent office, staring at a clock tower in a small German town. That's what he did. He just worked in a patent office and stared at a clock that was in the center of town. And that's how he thought up relativity and all those other, you know, that's where he had his A-bomb idea cone and he did not have the A-bomb idea. My point is, What is happening? I don't know. Is that even, is that even true for Rils about Einstein staring at a clock? I've been there. No, you haven't.

Yeah. Where's the town? Is it, oh, it's in Baron Switzerland. Baron Switzerland. That's right. That's right. He was in Baron Switzerland, Einstein, and he was working in a patent office, I believe, at a kind of a humdrum job. Yeah. And there's a little museum you can go to now. Yeah. And there's a clock in the center of town and he would stare at that clock and that's where he started to hatch his early theory of relativity. He was on a little train or a trolley moving away from the clock. And that's how he got the idea. He was either moving towards it or away. And that's how you got the idea for relativity and speed and all that. You know what? You know that there's something else to this story that's missing, that if you could go back,

Einstein was, you know, loved to pretend to be humble, but you notice how he took all the credit? Like, I was just on the train and it was moving and I saw the clock tower and that I thought of. And you know that there was a kid or there was like a ticket taker who came by and was like, you know, I need to take your tickets. I need to take your tickets. Oh, look at the clock. Everything's relative. Right? And Einstein was probably like trying to sleep. No, but you see how it's going and it's just like, do you think maybe there's a speed at which time would slow down? And Einstein was like, oh, he's always talking about the speed slowing down when he gets faster from the clock. I'm just something I'm just a humble ticket taker. But if that idea comes of any use to you, young patent man,

maybe you could include my name. What's your name? My name is Heselhofer. Okay, sure. I'll include you later. Incredible, Einstein. Did this idea come to you and you alone? Yes, it did. Cut to Heselhofer, who by that point has lost his job at the train station. He's wandering the streets of Switzerland alone with his broken cuckoo clock, looking for a place to get some soup. And he's reading and he passes the newspaper. Einstein thinks of relativity all by himself. Right? What a dick. I hate what I'm saying is you know that someone else, these stories, these stories, there's always something else. So yes, you were there, weren't you? Matt, you saw the clock tower. He didn't think of that himself. Definitely there was someone else.

The museum is a patent office. Is that fun? Well, we went up to the door and didn't go in. It's like a tiny little building and it felt cramped. I think I remember being oddly expensive for what you're about to get. Wait a minute, you went to, you were standing outside the patent office, the little office where Einstein thought up relativity and you all it took was for you to hand them a piece of dark chocolate and you could have gone and looked at the actual room where the single biggest idea since Newton had his theory of gravity and you didn't go in? No. Well, you could see in it from the doorway. Are you a cheapskate? I could see in it from the doorway. What a cheapskate. You used to work at Disneyland. What if I said, oh yeah, when I'm on

the freeway and you get nearby, you can kind of see what's going on in there. I didn't go by. So yeah, bless you, brother. I understand. I've driven by, oh, I was, we took off LAX and we banked and I could sort of see Disneyland off in the distance. Yeah, I got the idea. You don't have to go. And also, I just want to see the room where clearly Einstein was goofing off. What was he, what do you mean goofing off? He was not doing his patent work. Sona, there's a lot of times at the office where you sit outside my office and you could be thinking up a theory equivalent to relativity or something like that. I am. Instead, you're watching sometimes porn at work. Well, in my defense, first of all, my computer doesn't face anyone else. So I can

watch whatever I want. And second, I just think that like, you don't know what I'm doing. What's the dirtiest thing you've looked at at work? You really want to know? Do you really want to know? Okay, so my, you know, every once in a while when, especially when we go to Comic-Con, sometimes we think of and learn these new sexual acts. So not that this is new, but what does that have to do with Comic-Con? What do you mean? We're off to, you know, we're off to a comic book convention. So of course, that introduces the concept of sexual acts, perverse sexual acts. How do those two connect? We all sit around in the audience during one year rehearsing and we'll be like, hey, does anybody know about padlocking? And then that's how we like look into it. But one of our

favorite videos, and I'm saying hour because a couple other people from the office came and watched it was like a, you know, maybe it was like a fisting video. Did you watch that on the work computer? I did. Yes. Oh, no, I hope HR doesn't find out. Like, anyone cares at our office. Was I at work when this was happening? Yeah, you were in your office. You were in the video. Unwillingly. I didn't know. It was a prank fisting video. I didn't know you could make a prank show like that. And I was, what happened to candid camera? Those were such, it was such innocent fun. But no, was I, was I nearby when this was shown? Because I don't look at that. I'm not going to look at that. No, you don't look at

it. But you don't, you don't, you never hear people like around my office congregating. They'll be like, Oh my God. I thought you were watching me at rehearsal and like, Oh my God, he's quick. Oh, that was a good at it. Oh my God. That was a deep, deep, deep thought he just had. You think we all get around and watch rehearsal and like cheer you on? I just, yeah, you're watching a maestro at the height of his game. When you guys were shrieking and saying that is so amazing, I can't believe that just happened. I thought you were talking about rehearsal, not a fist going into another person's orifice. Well, anyway, my point is to bring it all back is that if fisting videos had been available in that patent office, we wouldn't have the

theory of relativity, right? I think we should have gone with take two. We'll never know. Well, many disturbing thoughts. I was going to say a lot to chew on, but I don't want to. Oh, come on. Let's move along. My guest today, good Lord, very funny comedian and host of the Eric Andre show on Adult Swim. His hilarious movie Bad Trip is now streaming on Netflix. And it's a delight. It really is. Eric Andre, welcome. I'm literally sweating because my kitchen is hot and my girlfriend is making sausages. You're mopping yourself right now. I'm going to describe the action for those viewers who can't see because it's a podcast. Eric Andre mopping his forehead with an overly

large white towel. Mopping. I'm turning on the AC. You see, I'm turning on my air conditioning. Now, where are you? This is where JJ Abrams succeeded and I failed. He has the AC. I have all my windows open. I'm not going to close each one. We gave you a lot of credit because two people have been technically proficient at setting up their Zoom so far during the pandemic. JJ Abrams holds the crown, but you were very good at getting on your computer and handling everything very quickly with an eerie expertise. I will tell you this. I felt guilty. I'm going to peel back the curtain for the viewership. I went a little late, seven minutes late. I don't like being late and I'm always late. I live in a constant state of agony. Existence

is punishment for me. So I had to eat and I asked Conan, one of my heroes, if I could eat, he very politely. He's no Wolf Blitzer. He said yes. Thank you. By the way, let's just get it out there. Wolf Blitzer, an insane Caligula-like madman. Monster. Monster. But you came on and we were scheduled to start at 11. You came on right on time and you were stuffing noodles into your face out of a bowl and you said, I just haven't had a chance to eat. I've never seen someone put so many noodles in their mouth. And I said, chill. It's just a podcast. Yes. Relax. Go and eat your food. You're a big deal. You've got a huge massive movie hit right now. You have the time to go and eat your noodles

and we will wait for you. I thought you were going to say huge massive aerials right now. I'll be honest with you. Both are true. I have spread out sand dollar pancakes on each of my man. I have seen you shirtless and it's a fuck. It's insane looking. It looks like two. They look like spaceships. They look like UFOs side by side that are floating on your chest. Massive UFOs. Ed Wood used my nipples in plan nine for outer space. Yeah, yeah. He did. That little fun fact for the real cinephiles out there listening. You look handsome. I like your glasses. Thank you. I love everything going on. I like, you got a prairie home companion kind of going on. I do. You know, it's a chilly day here in Los

Angeles, which means it's 85 and I'm wearing, I'm dressed like a lumberjack today. I'm wearing a T-shirt, a sweater, and then I'm wearing a lumberjack shirt over that and those are layers of masculinity that I've added to myself that I inherently don't have. Eric, I am so happy for you because I have been a fan of yours for a long time. We've worked together. You've done very many hilarious things on my show over the years. You've done some of the best entrances of any. Anytime you come on my show, Eric, you always insist, I can't just come out. We can't just say, ladies and gentlemen, it's Eric Andre and you come walking out. That can't happen. You always have to come out in an insane way. Yes. And it always has to be bigger and bigger

and bigger every time, culminating in you dropping from the ceiling. No, that was Zach Alvinakis. I think I begged for that to happen. No, no, no. You were asking for it. You asked for it, but you did something else where I thought you were injured when you came out. I'm trying to remember what it was. Two things. Once I did get injured, I popped out of the couch one time and one time I came out of a piñata. Yes, that's it. I meditated in your writer's room right before I came out and I don't think I told your AD that I was going to meditate. And I came out of the meditation to this frantic PA like, you're late. You're late for the piñata. We got to stuff you in the piñata, sir. And I was like, oh, oh, oh, sorry. I ran downstairs.

You guys stuff me in the piñata and the art department was so frantic. They were hot gluing me into this piñata and a little drip of hot glue came down and like, it was pure darkness in there. Yeah. So I didn't know what it was and it felt so hot that it felt cool at first. And I was like, that's a nice little cool refreshing drop. They just, and I was like, I couldn't scream either because you knew it was a reveal. You were going to set up for the bit was its national piñata. Yes. Yes. There we go. There we go. It's just the laziest setup. Hey, wait a minute. Wait a minute. And I say that as the as a high compliment because for the Eric Andre show, we pride ourselves on the like laziest end of the day writing like when it's like 545 p.m. and all the writers

are just like rubbing their temples like, please, Eric, can we go home? Like those ideas are always the best. That's coming up with our dumbest ideas. So Tommy Blacha is a writer that we have shared and he told us very early on in the Eric Andre show and he looked around and we're like, we're way in our head about everything. And he goes, if you overthink, you over stink. And I have taken that mantra. You know, we got that. You know, we got that. Where? That was my rule at the show. I used to say to the writers and it's not you over stink. I would say, remember, when you overthink, you start to stink because it was such a stupid thing to do. And I always would say it like I was Yoda and this was the greatest wisdom they would ever get. It really is though.

It really, really is because there's nothing like a joke that comes from like the smartest people you know and the smartest group of comedians and writers, you know, and forcing them to think like a third grader. There's some magic in that high brow, low brow, like joke writing that, I don't know, it just like works on all levels. So thank you for being Yoda to Tommy. And thank you for when you overthink your mantra. You start to stink. And shout out to Tommy Blacha, one of the most talented comedy writers I've ever worked with. Really brilliant guy. Yes. So wait, time to the story. Oh, that is the end of the story. So the glue burned me and then I burst out of the pinata. But I just that is a high compliment that the

setup was national pinata day. But I love that. I love that. This is this is the profession you and I work in. I say, oh, you had some great entrances. And I said, you fell from the ceiling once you went, no, that was that Galifianakis. I burst out of a pinata. And I'm thinking, what stupid jobs we have that you're not correcting me on no doctor, you use the carotid clamp before you worked on the aorta. You're saying, no, no, no, it was it was that Galifianakis who fell from the ceiling. I popped out of a pinata. Okay, I guess I'm an idiot that I will say the reason I know that is because I was so envious of Zach for coming up with that, like, because I think that was like the very first time I did press and late night. And I

fantasized about falling from the ceiling on your show for years. And I finally have my own TV show and I get to get on your show. And he did that like a week before I came on, like out of the ether, like right in front of me. So I'm always green with envy of Zach for coming. He did it just to spite you, you know, I got my he got my head like the minority report that Tom Cruise movie. Yeah, I have to say, Eric, okay, I this is something I want to say in all sincerity before we just devolve into complete idiocy. But I wanted to thank you for your movie, Bad Trip, because I'm thanking you because you did something that speaks to me, which is you you made this comedy confection, which is filled with just delightful silliness,

really intelligent silliness, but also silly and foolish silliness all mixed together. And it's made me like humans more, because I thought when it was over, I loved that it wasn't you weren't ridiculing other people. And almost everybody who is quote, the victim in one of these pranks, you see them at their best, they're helping, they're stepping in their reactions are real. And then you let them in on the joke at the end and everyone's hugging. And I thought that we need more of what this is. We just need more of this. This just was the perfect movie for me right now at the end of a year long pandemic and just all the bullshit we've all been through. And I think everyone's having that reaction. Thank you, man. Well, that is high praise. And yeah, we pulled off like the

greatest magic trick of all time doing that. I think, um, yeah, I hope the movie heals America. Oh, you went too far. You went too far. You know, there hasn't been one case of COVID or cancer since the movie came out. There's actually, no one's died. No, there have been no deaths in the world since that came out. But no, it really is like, I'm not even, I had a feeling of just, I watched it, my wife and I were howling and laughing really hard. And then I just felt good. And I, and it kind of underscored, uh, I keep going back to this, but Charles Barkley, not too long ago, there's, he had this quote where he just said, you know what, most people are good. We have a media and a system. And I'm not talking about just Fox, I'm talking about Fox and CNN

and MSNBC, everybody and social media. They like to find the fault lines and drive a wedge into it because unfortunately that's where the money is. That's how you make money in. And this was not doing that. And it's hilarious. And I thought, everyone pay attention to this. This is, it's very hard to pull off and not everyone can do it. But this is the kind of comedy that speaks to me right now. My first thing was like, okay, I'm so excited to get to talk to Eric, but mostly, I just want to thank him up top. Nice man. It's a nice thing you did. I appreciate that. Yeah, we pulled off a miracle. I think that the best quote, we showed a very like early rough cut to Sasha Baron Cohen in his house. He like invited me and my director, my producer,

over because we were like struggling with certain parts of the movie, getting it on its feet. And right when the movie finished, he turned to us and he goes, you know, I can't really do his accent, but he's, he's from, he's from England. He goes, you know, you know, pass me some Earl Gray. He goes, my, he goes, my movies set out to like expose the hypocrisy and evil of rich white oligarchs. He goes, your movie is exposing the beauty and the humanity of the working class and people of color. It's like not polarized. It's showing like American unity. And I think, I think what happens with the media is that they, you know, we, like they monetize clickbait and clickbait is like fear mongering and, and getting people riled up. And, and, and there's not a news

story out there that goes, Hey, somebody in St. Louis was nice to somebody else. Like that's not a news story. We just put up a microphone up to like the kind of worst parts of America, not the best parts of America. So we pulled off a miracle and it took us a while to get there. It was like, I've been working on the movie for seven and a half years and it took us a while to get there. But we realized Eric Andre show is 11 minutes long. Right. It's a different medium. My persona on the Eric Andre show, which is like late night adult swim, anarchic, you know, psychedelic comedy, that guy can be as psychotic and antagonistic and absurd and surreal as he wants to be during a prank because you're only hanging out with him for 11 minutes. The guy in

the character in the movie to get across 90 minutes of footage, you have to sympathize with the character's plight. We realized early on, my character had to be this Chris Farley-esque, unintentionally destructive, like gentle, like golden retriever, like I mean well, but everything I touch turns to shit because I'm just chasing a tennis ball all around. You know, what I was really nice to set up is that you're in love. You see the actress who plays your love interest. Yes, McKayla Conlon. You see her and you look like a dog that's just seen an ice cream cone on a hot day and you just, you have this look of wonder and astonishment and then looking at people's real reactions to your cartoonish, frankly. I've never seen anyone fall in love. It's such an absurd.

It's certainly cartoonish way and real life and pull it off because you really commit to it and you see this woman and you're just like, oh, and it's so angelic and sweet and you're a hobo seeing a pie cooling on a window sill that you can grab. It's just ridiculous and people reacting to it but I think that's the motivation and that's all the motivation you need. It's so pure and you can all connect to it so I think that's what helps the movie so much is that you're in love and you're taking a chance on finding the love of your life and that's a very relatable and sweet story automatically and then you can do the most horrible things along the way. Back to what I was saying before, the pranks had to be sympathetic. I had to be sympathetic so

like the pranks had to be help me, help me pranks and because I was sympathetic and I had to be in peril in the pranks, it showed the humanity out of the people we're pranking instead of like punching down or antagonizing them or making them look dumb or there's no like dacha kind of pranks. Well, I also thought there's so much intelligence behind it and just as someone who tries to make comedy, I was watching it thinking, oh, I love this. I love how much thought went into this but what I really appreciate at the end of the day was this is just a nice story too. That's a really sweet story and that's a story I want to kind of watch again and I felt so much better after I watched it. That to me is the beauty of what can be done. I kind of started

to go down this road of are people going to want to, because this has been a huge success for you and I'm very happy but what if people just aren't content to watch a conventional movie ever again because it's so much fun like this hybrid, this idea that, okay, let's take some of the anarchy that comes out of a really good prank and reality cameras sort of cutting around in documentary style, guerrilla style but let's also choose our moments to really shoot it with a good cinematographer and with good lighting and stitch it together as a story as well and I thought, oh my god, what if actors all go out of work forever? What if you've just destroyed movies and acting? That's what you've done. I know. I think I was talking to

Makayla who plays Maria in the movie about it and I think we had a moment where she said something like, should we be worried that these like everyday people that we were pranking in the movie are way more charismatic than any actor or comedian we've ever met? Like they have way more personality and charisma and they're like plumbers and train conductors and they're just like so much more fascinating and have so much more depth than us but yeah, I don't know. Jeff Tremaine was our mentor throughout this process. He directed all the Jackass movies, he co-created Jackass and he directed Bad Grandpa, him, Johnny Knoxville and Spike Jones have been working together for 20 plus years and have made half a billion dollars for Paramount so he was our Papa Bear throughout

the whole process and he kept, when we first started pitching him ideas, me and the guy that directs my show Keetow and my writing partner Dan Curry, we kept pitching him just joke based and he kept going, yeah, you need a story, that's not going to sustain for 90 minutes. I was like, yeah, you need a story, blablabla, listen buddy, I'm on an adult swim for 11 minutes at night at four in the morning. I think I know a thing or two about a thing or two and he's like, he goes, I'm telling you, you need a story and it's got to have a heart and it took him years to just slap us and throw cold water in our face until we realized and we were like even filming, we were like, go out and film pranks, try to stitch them together, they weren't working,

rewriting the story, like putting more and more story and then like slowly but surely we saw all, we had some killer pranks that were totally off story and they just went away and we realized the pranks that are on story are so much richer even when they're really simplistic, like one of the pranks that I love best in the movie is when Tiffany Haddish's character, you know, she's the villain, she finally catches up to us in this like little chicken wing spot and she has a flyer with our face on it, she's like, have you seen these guys, they stole my car, I know they're close and then she leaves and then me and Rell walk in and everybody in the restaurant is like, oh, that's them, that's them, that's the guys on the flyer, they stole the pink

car, there it is and then he starts panicking and he leaves, it's like such a simplistic prank, there's no gorilla butt fucking me, there's no explosions, there's no pyrotechnics, you know, I'm coming from just like, I want everything to just be a giant explosion every five seconds and Jeff was like, we have to have this scene, it's like so on story and it became one of the richest and at the same time, most minimalist pranks in the whole movie, but the people who were pranking were so on the hook and so invested in the story, in the narrative within the movie that they just came to life and we just lucked out with some of the most charismatic. Well, you know what's really fantastic is it's also just a study in humanity and not, and I

think humanity comes out pretty well, but for anyone who hasn't seen the movie and I think a lot of people listening will have seen it, but if you don't know what we're talking about, it's this idea of these people are just there, they're eating their food, they're innocent, they don't know that they're in a movie and so Tiffany Hattish comes in and says, have you seen these guys, they stole my car, shows your pictures, gets everyone all wound up, then leaves. Minutes later, you guys come in. In a pink car that's clearly the one that she described and they're all activated and then you see them trying to figure out, trying to make the right moral choice, like who to rely with, we don't want to snitch on these guys, but and then

there's this one woman who gets very invested and then you guys leave and then Tiffany Hattish comes back in and she's like, they were just here and she has a friend who's saying, you're saying too much, don't get too involved and I guess what was so beautiful about it is that I liked, everyone was trying to do the right thing, do you know what I mean? And I think that I take that thread, just we spend so much time talking, especially in the last four or five years about how sick our country is and how sick we are and there's a lot of self-loathing and certainly we have our share of problems and I would say America and humans have always had their share of problems and I think this country is always a work in progress and we always need to do better.

I think that's all perfectly true, but we get hammered so much and throughout this film, I just kept seeing people for the most part being incredibly patient. You're acting, you know, more you than Rell. You're acting like a complete fool and you're really, you're practically vomiting on people and you're putting people's lives in danger and people are still trying to help you and they're trying to steer you onto the right path and I loved that because I thought that that's my experience with humans is, I don't know, 70% are pretty good and then, you know, that's not bad. Like maybe it's 70, but I think that really came across in the film is I couldn't believe how patient people were with you. For the most part, there is a scene where you and

Rell are connected. This is that old comedy trope of two men's penises being attached with the Chinese finger trap. Anyway, you know, we've all seen it. The Marx Brothers did it. Fields did it. Evan Costello. Evan Costello were attached for years by the cock, but but I just love that like there's one scene where I felt, there was a moment where I felt real jeopardy when you guys went into a barber shop to ask for help because your penises were attached and I thought you could have gotten killed. What do you think? Definitely could have gotten killed. The guy that we pranked confirmed that he was going to kill us afterwards. Yeah, he well, I thought from the top. So for anybody, you know, that hasn't seen the movie. We do this

prank in the hood where we're connected. Our penises get stuck in a Chinese finger trap and we can't get out. So we run into this like hood ass barber shop and this dude, we go, excuse me, sir, can you cut us out of this Chinese finger trap? And this guy just exploded into a murder rage because all he saw in his establishment, he's a small business owner, were two eccentric perverts. Yep. Just sir, they so laying their cocks back and forth in a Chinese finger trap. He didn't know what I don't even think he heard what we said. I think he just saw. Yeah. And we also like revealed it to him weird. You couldn't get cut. We didn't have good coverage of it, but like we like like here's our cocks and I went like, excuse me, sir. And I took my hand like a magician.

Like a magician. Like a magician saying it looks like one cock, but no, sir, it is two. That man is not in the mood for any magic. So he started looking around like grabbing at his back back and he was going, oh, hell no. Oh, hell no. Pulled out a knife, chased us out with a knife. That was Rell's first day of shooting. Yes. Not the movie, not just the movie, but a hidden camera prank. That was the first hidden camera prank he had ever filmed. He quit the movie. Yes. He told me this, by the way. I talked to him last week and he told me he was horrified. He did that prank and he said, I quit. I just quit after that. I quit the movie and you keep telling the story because I've heard his side of it,

but he said he quit and then he called a friend to like vent. Yes. So we run out of there. Mm hmm. The thing, the, the, the prosthetic peanut trap snaps in half. Rell goes like rolling under a park truck. I'm running for my life. We yell cut. We're like, cut, cut. It's a prank. And the guy on a dime with a knife in his hand goes, oh, y'all are hilarious. Knife in hand. He's like, this is a prank. Oh, you got me good, man. Like putting his knife away. Like that's great. And then he went, and then he was like, you know, I usually bring my gun to work, but I just forgot it today. You guys are lucky. And we were like, oh, and Rell heard that. So Rell walked back. I don't even think he got in the, the, like our passenger vans. I think he

walked back to our hotel. We were in Atlanta with like half of this like fake, like prosthetic, rubbery, dick, Chinese finger trap contraction hanging out of his pants. He was so angry. I don't think he remembered he had the thing on. He's just like walking through the streets of Atlanta. I hate Eric. I hate this movie. I quit. And then, uh, yeah, he called Tiffany just event. Tiffany was not cast in the movie. And we had the serendipitous thing happen where the woman who was going to play that role just dropped out because of a scheduling conflict. She was doing a television show. So at that moment, we just started shooting some pranks with just me and Rell while we were looking for a replacement for the Trina character. And he, you know, I almost got him

murdered. He calls Tiffany Haddish just as a friend to vent. He goes, I'm doing this Eric Andre prank movie. He almost got me killed. I want to quit. I hate this shit. And Tiffany just starts dying laughing. They hang, they, they end the call. She calls me and she goes, yo, you almost got Rell killed. And I was embarrassed. I was like, yeah, don't tell anybody. And she goes, no, fuck that. That shit's hilarious. I live for that prank. Shit. I want to be in your movie. And I was like, wait, what? That's great. I love that. This is what I found out is that she's in the movie because Rell called her to complain about how he's not going to, he's going to walk from this stupid prank movie and that got her to be in it. And she's

absolutely great, by the way. She is comedy on a cellular level. There is not one medium of comedy that she doesn't do at 110%. Stand up, acting, improv, hitting camera pranks. There was no prank we threw at her. There was no scenario that we threw at her that she was like, huh, what? She would just go, got it and go in and take number one, just knock it out of the park. She is, I was like, she's a movie star for a reason. It was one of those like, she's a star. Like she was destined to be where she's at. I love there's another thing that I really love. And this I would have thought my comedy brain would have said, this isn't going to work if it had been pitched to me, which is, it looks like you're about to be killed and you're hanging from

a building. And Tiffany's looks like she's going to throw you off the building. Her character's going to kill your character. And people down the street see you about to die. And then somehow you distribute megaphones to them, to those people. So they can shout up advice. Now, I would have said, Oh, the minute you start distributing megaphones, people are going to say, why, why do you have seven megaphones? Why do you have suddenly have megaphones and why are you getting us involved? But no, in that moment, people just want to help and they don't question, they jump over all that. And so people have megaphones and you guys are kind of coaxing them, you're hanging there about to die saying, well, what else? What else? And they're coming up with

whatever they can think of on the fly to say to you. And of course, it's some of the funniest stuff in the movie to me is what these bystanders come up with on the fly to save your life. And then it shouldn't, it shouldn't work, but it worked beautifully. Yeah, Jeff and I were like at odds. I really wanted to do that prank. Jeff Jermaine and I, and he goes, he's like, can we pull that off? Are people going to buy that? I was like, please, let's just go for it. He's like, okay, but that is like insane. And it was like just crazy enough to work. And when the megaphone was like handed over to the people were pranking, I just made sure to like keep their focus on me. So like, we had my locations manager dressed as a construction worker, we don't feature him,

there's no, there's no fake reaction. So we don't, we just like see the corner of his shoulder, maybe his hand passing off the megaphone. And I at that moment went, help. I screamed help as loud as I could, so that they're just paying attention to me. I don't know, like mid sentence, whatever I was saying, whether it made sense or not. So that the, the pass off was just cohesive. And they didn't really realize what was going on. And my favorite part of that is actually at the very top, the first woman that grabs the megaphone just assumes I'm guilty. She goes, what the hell did you do to her? She doesn't question like, yep, he is guilty. Like maybe he's innocent and she's off her meds, you know? None of that. Yeah, no, no, no, no, but, but it's a fair assumption given

you just put off an energy of, yeah, you're in the wrong. You, you did it. Most people, I think everybody in those pranks would take Tiffany's side. Like they're like, yeah, he's guilty. Look at him kind of face. You know what's kind of interesting? Just this is inside baseball stuff, but I've spent 28 years going out and doing remotes, you know, as part of my gig. And it's the part that I like the most. It's also the part that I find the hardest in a way, because I can build up to a point where I can be in front of 60 people acting like a complete fool. And I can, and I can be that person and do whatever I need to do to get there. But an hour before that, I'm a quiet cerebral person who's terrified at the thought of doing the thing that

people are pitching to me. And it's very hard to explain to people, this is the sense I get with you, Eric, is that now that you, this movie's out, people know you from your show, but this movie is such a massive hit, there are people that think you're always that guy. You're always a guy who can stand at the top of a bar and take a 30 foot fall into some furniture and then get up and start cone vomiting on everybody through a pneumatic tube. That is what they think. But I know for a fact that that's your many people and that you actually have to exist a lot of the time is the opposite of that person in order to get to do that. Is that right? Yeah, I'd say so. I think like I don't film the cloud of anxiety and depression I'm in

in the morning before I have to fall 30 feet and into furniture and barf through a cone. That is, that is not in the footage. And you, and you, it's funny because Rel was telling me, oh, you know, Eric meditates, he's he'll be meditating before he goes out and does these things as if, isn't that crazy? And I thought, oh, I completely understand that. I completely understand almost having to dig a deep hole and go into a very quiet place before you can be the person who has no fear. Yeah. And I still have the fear and the fear is actually good. The anxiety is actually good. I've been on stage doing standup where I didn't give a shit about the show and I didn't have the fear and the anxiety and that culminates in a mediocre

set. But when I have the fear, that means I want it. And when you want it, you feel that percolating in the scene. So yeah, I meditate and exercise almost every day and I try to journal just to keep as calm as I possibly can because I've always like struggled with anxiety. But I'm also putting myself in very anxiety-provoking situations. I asked the great Tony Randall, and this is in 1993. I said to him, this is going to sound crazy, Mr. Randall, but I feel so bad sometimes before I go out and perform. And I don't know why it almost feels necessary. And he just said, but my dear boy, we all have to feel bad in order to feel good. That's what all performers have to do. And he said it like, don't you get it? This is, this is how comedy

works. Yeah. Now there are exceptions to that rule. Like, I know Jerry Seinfeld, I think he's, he's the same guy. I think he's like, what's the big deal? I'm going to go out and do my, you know, he's, he can just do it. He can do it. I don't, I'm not knocking him. He's just, I think he's the exception. Like he's able to. He did say one of my favorite quotes though, where he goes, it's not show fun, it's show business. Yeah. And it is a struggle and stressful. And your discomfort is the audience's pleasure sometimes, especially shooting, hitting camera pranks. While I'm shooting the prank, a lot of the times I'm just thinking the more uncomfortable I am during this, the more comfortable I'll be in the editing bay watching it and going, oh, I'm so glad I took that leap off,

you know, the, the bar top or whatever and like push through that fear and anxiety. Right. And you want to make sure that's the thing too, is while you're shooting these things for the years and years, I've been doing it just in out in the field. It's, I, I want that feeling of, I think we got it. And if you don't feel like, if you didn't get it, you're, there's nothing, you can't go home. You can't get back in the van and go home unless you've, unless you have it. And if you don't have it, you're eternally screwed. And so that's where a lot of the anxiety percolates, I think. It does fuck with your mind though, because I've had many a night where I'm like, I didn't get it. I didn't get it. I fucked up, didn't get it. And then, you know, a few months

go by and I'm finally watching this bit in the editing bay and I'm like, Oh no, I totally got it. I just, my face was down because I was whatever the scenario, getting butt fucked by a gorilla, let's say. And I didn't see the reaction. You know, that didn't used to be a common example people threw out. It didn't used to be. I remember there was a prank I did for the Eric Andre show where I was in the streets of New York, like in Union Square or downtown somewhere like handing out samples of like, like oat milk smoothies or something like that in little like sample cups on a little street stand. And then I revealed that I had this like pendulous male breast that would squirt like breast milk into the smoothie. And then I would continue handing it to

the people who were pranking. And people were shocked. But I didn't I went home so frustrated. I remember being so angry because I was like, I didn't get a single good reaction. And then months later, when I saw the edit, I was like, Oh, I just thought I wasn't getting good reactions. Because when people were reacting, I was so like tied down by this like man boo prosthetic that my head was down. And I was so just focused on getting my action right, that their best reactions were happening when I was just looking down. So it can fuck with you sometimes where sometimes you think you don't got it, and you got the best thing ever. And vice versa, where you're like, dude, that's going to be the best prank. Oh, my God, we got great reactions. We nailed it.

And then you just watch it in the editing bay. And it's just kind of lukewarm or it takes too long to get so so really a comedy constantly fucks with your head stand up to everything. It's like the joke you think like, here it is. This is my home run closer. The audience is like, huh, like I don't get your propitia reference or whatever the thing, you know, or or or whatever you're you know, what you think is a common reference is an obscure reference or whatever the issue is, or or sometimes this little throwaway dumb idea becomes like the biggest hit of the show or the movie or you're set. So how many fucks with your head? It fucks with my head all the time. I'm always surprised by the audience. That is the the one conclusion I've come to after

I got started in 85. So it's just I can't even count how long that is anymore. 36 years. Yeah, it's like, OK, I didn't like it. Good thing I started when I was eight. I'm going to go into comedy now. You're eight years old. I begin now, I tell you. Yes, rip your scantron in half. But the one thing I've learned is you never know you and that is the part you can be, you know, getting ready to like for a biggest deal and you don't know which joke is going to you can be performing in front of a president and you don't you've thought about it and thought about it and thought about it and you don't know which jokes are going to work and which ones aren't and you won't until that moment comes and then you and it's the same thing with shooting out in

the field. You just don't know and there are times where you think there are times where I'm sure, oh my god, that thing where we get back, we get back from the field and we've shot something or we've been on a travel show and then I've said, oh my god, I can't wait to see you guys cut together that thing where I'm in the noodle hut. When I'm in the noodle hut, that just gets really crazy. I don't even know what a noodle hut is by the way. But when I'm in the noodle hut, I'm hungry, I mean, whatever it is, I'm eating it. You know what I mean? But I'm like, when we're in the noodle hut and man, that thing, I can't wait to you guys and then later on they're showing me stuff and there's a lot of good stuff and I go, where's the noodle hut? And they go, yeah,

didn't cut, didn't come together. And then I'll say like, you're like, you're kidding. That was absolutely the funniest thing I've ever done. Show it to me and they'll show it to me and immediately. Oh, no, it's not there. Now I'm supposed to be an expert. You're supposed to be an expert. We don't know. We just don't know. We don't know. We have a hunch. We don't know. Yeah. The worst is when you're like kind of cocky about it with your editor and your editor's like, I'm telling you the noodle hut doesn't work. And you're like, Luke, trust me. Just just cut, just show me the cut. And he's like, all right, man, like I've been in that conversation with my editors so often. And I'm just like, at the end, they press pause, you know, they're done

showing you the cut and you're like, well, you know, I mean, you were fucking right. They do that. They do that. They always have a swivel chair and they do that cocky swivel in the chair. So they show it to you and then you're like, well, I'm leaving this noodle hut and cut. And then it's always a little squeaky and they look at you and you go, yeah, okay, okay. You know, I think it's better than you said it was. But yeah, maybe it's not going to the show. Maybe it's not going to go in. Then they turn back. I'm like, you could oil the fucking chair. You're just doing that. They're always right. It's so frustrating. They're always fucking right. You're like, damn it. You know what I realized? I realized that you have an unfair advantage

because I was thinking about this. I didn't know this that your mom, I may have known this once, but I forgot about it, but your mom's, is this right? She's Ashkenazi Jewish and your dad's an Afro Haitian immigrant. And I was thinking, wait, Jewish, black, those are two of the maybe three best comedy genes. That's not fair. I mean, I've got the Irish thing and we, okay, the Irish, they have a good comedy gene, but I'm 100% just that. You've got this insane superhero mix of powers in comedy, which feels unfair to me, frankly. Yeah, I, you know, just being Sammy Davis Jr. just lucked out. I think he converted. I don't think that's different. That's different. I've converted to Judaism many times and it has not, I'm not getting, I'm not getting that,

that sweet superpower that all my Jewish friends have. Well, that sweet super powers called anxiety and depression. Congratulations, Eric. I just wanted to end on that, on that note. Well, you know what, I, I don't want to keep you any longer because you have been so gracious with your time. Let me end where I started, which is you've always been a great champion of silliness and of goodwill. And then for you to put all that magic into this movie, and I know it's been a seven year struggle, but to put all that together and then to pull it off with such a plomb really makes me happy. Really. Thanks, man. Thank you. That is high praise. And I'm such a fan and I grew up watching you. So it's, it's, it's an honor to hear those words. Well, you just basically,

you know, that was your way of putting it in there again, how old I am. When I was six and you were eight and you were on television. Conan Winnett, I remembered when I was seven and you were 60 and I was watching you and you were just hitting it out of the park. And I knew that. You were 29 on late night. Yeah. Like you were, I just for shits, like watched an old like season one of you and you look like, like you just had your sweet 16. Hey, so I got a licorice whip the other day. A Charleston chew in your pocket and you're like, Hey, you're like biting on a shiny quarter. I'm telling you, if anyone wants to know what would it be like if an 11 year old girl from the depression was given a TV show, go back and look at any of my shows from 1993. And that's exactly

what it looks like. How did you convince NBC to take a chance on you at that youth? Like, like, in what meeting did you go, it's going to be me, baby? Like I would have loved, you just stood up. You're like, in my 29 years on this earth, in my three years in show business, I'll tell you. Letterman's out, I'm in, baby. Well, a quarterman's had his time and now it's mine. Wait, how did you get in here? You're supposed to just, you're supposed to leave the sandwich order, take the tip and go. No, he's out, and I'm in, see? Did you just corner Lauren, Michael? Oh, it's a whole. And like, a bunch of executive, did you just corner several executives and you were like, come on, Buster Brown. I will tell you this, I will someday have to tell that

whole story because it's a crazy story. I will tell you that you'd think now almost three decades later that I would look back on it and say, no, that made sense. It doesn't. None of it makes sense. But, you know, the plan worked. The plan was always for me to get the podcast. And so it worked. Hey, Eric, just all my insane love and gratitude for what you're putting out there. I mean that. And please keep doing more of that. We need it. We really do need it. Sounds good. Thank you, man. I appreciate it. Eric, go eat some sausage. Sounds good. That's not a euphemism. That they were making sausage. I will suckle a sausage. Okay. Well, that's out of you. That's out of you. That's how I eat sausage. Yeah. That's out of you. I can't wait to ram a sausage in and

out of my mouth many times until the juices shoot out. That's just the way I eat sausage. Can't a man have a literal conversation about sausage? Can't a guy talk about how he loves to lick a sausage? Sham it in and out of his mouth until it explodes without people getting all fucking weird? All right, Eric, go do more good things and relax. Sounds good. And thank you. That was great. Thanks, buddy. Thanks for doing it. Well, I have some exciting news, which is this is all happening in real time. It is now 12.30 in the afternoon. At 7.30 this morning, I got my second Moderna shot. My body is now pulsating with the second Moderna shot. It is coursing through

my veins as I speak. And so this is kind of an experiment in real time. The shot didn't hurt at all. Got my first shot a month ago. Today was the day, Sona. You were kind enough to come with me. Yep. You took it like a champ. Thank you. And they told me you might not feel well later today or maybe tomorrow that that's common. But I'm deciding that my mind is going to defeat this. It's mind over matter. I'm just deciding right now that I have a very powerful mind and a correspondingly weak body. So what I'm going to do is my mind is going to say no, no, I'm not getting anything. I will have no side effects. I'm just not interested. Not going to happen. Do you feel anything yet, like even a pain in the arm? No. No, I don't feel. I mean, there's a slight pain at the

site, but I'm going to will that away. That's not happening. Have you ever done this mind over matter thing before or is this the first time? No. Oh, okay. This is the first time. That's not true. That's not true. I was once, I have a pretty strong will. Would you say that's true, Sona? You do. Yeah. And I, when I'm, there have been times where I've been sick and I had to perform and I just decide I'm not sick. And then I have a pretty good time performing and then I get even sicker when I'm off stage. Yeah, that's true. And once I was visiting my wife's family in Seattle, this is like eight years ago, and a car filled with her friends backed over my left foot. Oh my God. And like her friends are big adult males and they were in a car and it backed over

my left foot and I felt a horrible pain and looked down and my foot didn't look right. And it was, it turned crazy black and blue. And my wife was like, I think you broke your foot. And I just said, no, no, let's not talk about it. And then I never went and got it checked out. And what happened? My mind, Sona, I just decided I'm not going down that road. We're not going to the hospital. I'm not getting an x-ray. I'm not having them set the bone. It's not going to happen. But there's no time for this shit is what I said. No, but that's not how science works. Like I know. And my father is a scientist. I know it doesn't make any sense, but I remembered I don't want this to have happened. Why did you even get the vaccine then?

Why not just willpower away COVID? Well, I think that's spreading an irresponsible message. Okay. Okay, Matt, I'm sorry, but I'm a believer in vaccinations. Hey, man, I'm fully vaxxed. Look, that's, you've just raised a really good question. Why didn't I just will myself not to get COVID? Yeah. Well, that, that, you just completely took apart my whole riff. I'm sorry. No, no, that was sick. You know what that was? That was strategic. I had a whole cocky riff going and then now you're like, yeah, you're right. I'm probably, now I'm going to get really sick, really big side effects from the second Moderna. Is your foot permanently damaged? No, there's no damage to my foot because

the accident didn't happen. That's how mind over matter works. No, it didn't. It didn't happen. You know when Wiley Coyote is chasing the road runner and the road runner stops and Wiley Coyote keeps running off the cliff and then he stands there for a long time. When does he fall? When he looks down. When he looks down. Yeah, role model. I see where this is going. Yes, he is a great role model because he is, I mean, first of all, people say, oh, poor Coyote, I see a guy who's joyous. I love the Coyote because he is always knows what his purpose is. Always. Think of all the calories that the Coyote is burning chasing. Yeah, he's yoked. The road runner. No, no, that's not my point. My point isn't that he's yoked. My point is that it's so calorie

inefficient to chase the road runner. But that's one of those things that I, you know, I don't understand. I just fundamentally don't understand. As a kid, that bothered me. Yeah, I get it. Where's he getting the money? Are you able to enjoy any entertainment? I like crime. Oh my God. I like true crime. Do you enjoy it? I mean, I do. I have a hard time sometimes with comedy because I spend a lot of time thinking about it, that it becomes what they call a busman's holiday, you know? But I've never heard that. You haven't heard that? You heard that phrase, haven't you, Matt? Has anyone heard that phrase? Okay, busman's holiday used to be, I think that phrase comes from like the 1930s or 40s when people would get on a bus and

take a nice trip around the country. And then you wonder, what does the bus man do on his holiday? I see. And so it's called a busman's holiday. I'm sorry. Okay. Well, see, so I, as someone who thinks about comedy all the time, if I'm watching, I might not relax watching a late night talk show because I go, oh yeah, they're doing old number 45B, you know? Oh, now he's doing number 27J. And I'm sure they'd be like, if Sona, if you went on a vacation to an assistance convention. Yeah. What an awful vacation that would be. Oh my God. Let's talk about schedules. Let's talk about getting your boss coffee. Oh, come on. What do you do when it's lukewarm? How many Splendors does your boss take in his coffee?

I wasn't too finicky about food and stuff, was I? Listen, no, here's what'll happen. I would heat up your food. I would take it to you. And then you'd be like, this isn't hot enough. And so I would have to take it back and heat it up. Same with your coffee. Like there was always this, like, ugh, it's just not hot enough. Really? Yes. But you were not that, no, it wasn't annoying. No, but I like, you know, I think you're a bit of an undercooker. I know that you're not experienced. Wow. Okay. No, just in general, I'm being honest. I'm being honest with you. You're someone who, as you have said, you didn't have much experience with a microwave. Yes. And so you tended to hit the button, which probably did 30 seconds. I'm someone who hits it

like seven times. I like my food to look like it just was rescued from the center of the sun. Do you know what I mean? Oh my God. Just pulsating with heat. During that segment, you said you heat up for two minutes. I was heating up your lunches for four minutes. Well, keep in mind, yes, and the microwave you were using was the first microwave ever built. It was circa 1975 and it was a NASA prototype. That's what you were using. You had to put on a beekeeper's outfit whenever you turned it on and you would fire up this thing and yeah, you'd hit it for five minutes and it would come out and maybe it was one degree warmer than it was when you removed it from the freezer. So my point is you didn't have a good microwave

and you should have compensated. Okay. Well, that's good. You know what? There was one time when I was an RA at a summer program for high school students and one girl had never used a microwave before in her life and she heated up in and out french fries for 10 minutes. Oh my God. And the smoke alarm went off and the entire building had to evacuate. I think she was Quaker. That's the way to end any story. Anytime anything happens that is sort of just strange or weird, just go, I think he slash she was Quaker. That's the way to do it. And so there's a hierarchy of cultures that use the microwave and there's the last on the list is Armenian except for Quakers. So you're saying, all right, so Armenians don't like microwaves and you're saying

Quakers because of their faith. They can use like. So like Amish or Mennonites would be in there too? Yeah. Well, they can use, the Amish can use a microwave if it's made of wood. If it's a wooden microwave and all wooden components, which is, it's still achievable, but it tends to burst into flames. The other day, true stories, you know those Yeti coffee containers? Yeah. Someone gave me one of those Yeti things because I, when I drive around, I like to drink coffee and it keeps it nice and hot. And I had some coffee in one and it was getting cold. So I went to put it in the microwave. It's metal. Oh. So what I did was I just opened the microwave, I put it in, I slammed it shut, I pressed, you know, 30 seconds and the thing lit up and just started to go,

and one neuron in my brain went, no. And so it did one second and I reached over and ripped open the thing and pulled it out just before I don't know what happened was going to happen. I think if, I mean, again, I'm going to reference the movie, Weird Science. Oh. I think I would have gone back in time and had sex with Kelly LeBrock, but that aside, I don't know. That was weird. It was weird. It would have been an explosion. I literally said out loud, no! And opened it up because I guess I don't know what happens, but if you microwave metal, it's bad, right? Yeah. Yeah, it's bad. I even know that. Here's the thing. You see, you've become so dependent on the microwave that you're like, let me put this in there without even thinking about what it is

and your entire house could have burned down. That's all. Maybe. Maybe I am too dependent on the microwave. You owe me an apology. Before I mail out a letter, I microwave it for 30 seconds. I'm doing things with a microwave now that aren't necessary. Before I take a Tylenol, I microwave it for 15 seconds because I think it's going to just make things happen faster once it gets in my body if it's slightly warm. Mind over matter. Yeah. Anyway, this was a great PSA for vaccinations. What happened? You know what we should do? We should get it out there. If an idiot like me is getting vaccinated, that's a sign that everyone should get vaccinated. That's how common sense it is to get vaccinated. Seriously, get vaccinated. I can't say that enough.

That's that I'm very serious about. I just had my second shot, still feeling nothing because mind over matter. Conan O'Brien needs a friend with Sonamov Sessian and Conan O'Brien as himself. Produced by me, Matt Gorley, executive produced by Adam Saks, Joanna Salatarov and Jeff Ross at Team Coco and Colin Anderson and Chris Bannon at Earwolf. Theme song by the White Stripes. Incidental music by Jimmy Vivino. Our supervising producer is Aaron Blair and our associate talent producer is Jennifer Samples. The show is engineered by Will Bekton. You can rate and review this show on Apple Podcasts and you might find your review featured

on a future episode. Got a question for Conan? Call the Team Coco hotline at 323-451-2821 and leave a message. It too could be featured on a future episode. And if you haven't already, please subscribe to Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or wherever fine podcasts are downloaded. This has been a Team Coco production in association with Earwolf.