Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend - Jessica Williams

Episode Date: August 18, 2025

Actress and comedian Jessica Williams feels pressured about being Conan O’Brien’s friend. Jessica sits down with Conan to discuss breaking ground as the youngest ever Daily Show correspondent, wo...rking with Harrison Ford on Shrinking, and why the best satire is rooted in love for the subject. Later, Conan and the team admire a fan-made Lego replica of themselves in the studio. For Conan videos, tour dates and more visit TeamCoco.com.Got a question for Conan? Call our voicemail: (669) 587-2847. Get access to all the podcasts you love, music channels and radio shows with the SiriusXM App! Get 3 months free using this show link: https://siriusxm.com/conan.

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Okay, hi, my name is Jessica Williams, and I feel pressured about being Conan's friend. They make you say it. It's crazy. They make you say it. Yeah. Yeah, this is a hostage situation. And I can't leave until I say it. It should feel like pressure because no one naturally becomes my friend. Fall is here, hear the yell, back to school, ring the bell, brandy shoes, walking a little.
Starting point is 00:00:30 Climb the fence, books and pens I can tell that we are going to be friends I can tell that we are going to be friends Hey there and welcome to another edition of Conan O'Brien needs a friend Let me explain what's going on Of course, joined as always by Matt Corley, Sonum of Sessian.
Starting point is 00:00:52 I've had a lot of dental work this morning. I went in my dentist. She does a wonderful job. She's really terrific. but she had to work on the front of my face and she had to work on the back on a molar and I like the way I said molar and she shot me up
Starting point is 00:01:11 with so much nola cane that my face is all floppy but are you also kind of drunk you seem drunk you didn't even say hi you just came in and was like let's go press record I am not drunk what a terrible thing to say it is It is 1.40 in the afternoon. No, I am not drunk.
Starting point is 00:01:30 Are you drunk off the Novakane? Like, is it affecting you? No, it doesn't, I don't think Novakane. I'd like to have a cycle farm here who tells us what the effects are. But no, I don't think I'm, I think I've been sitting in a chair at a dentist office for three hours while they played some Spotify playlist, which I didn't enjoy. Yeah. Like, what was it? You don't want to say.
Starting point is 00:01:52 Can you say the genre? It was just a lot of wailing. Maybe that was patience from the other room. No, it wasn't. I like the patience more. It was Halloween sound effects. No, it was, it wasn't doing any good. Any hoots.
Starting point is 00:02:10 And there was no opening like after we record this podcast? No, they could. Okay. I thought it was going to be this morning and it got pushed a little later. And I actually went in much earlier than I was supposed to. do and was like, you know, I got to record today and I care about my fans, the people
Starting point is 00:02:30 out there. Also, there was part of me in the back of my head that thought, I really want to get on Mike while my mouth was so mushy. Because I thought it's kind of funny. I mean, literally, if I had a drink right now, would all come out my mouth. Can you do it? No. Yeah, take a drink. You have a drink.
Starting point is 00:02:45 Please, I don't want to dribble all over myself. Go do it. You make a full of yourself. Yeah, I have other ways to do that. Don't need a prop, drink to make a fool of myself. I can just talk and share my opinions and thoughts that occur to me. Thoughts. Foughts.
Starting point is 00:03:01 Suffering. Fuck attached. No, but, you know, here's the thing. She gave me an injection up here by my, what's this, the incisor rate? What's this one? The canine. The canine. What'd you say to me?
Starting point is 00:03:13 I said, I don't know fucking teeth. I know what a molar is. But once we get past the molars, what is happening in there? You're the mother of two little boys. And you just went, I don't know fucking teeth. And you grab your crotch. Like, take it easy there. So what happens is when they get this nerve up front, it deadens your nose.
Starting point is 00:03:34 It's going up to my eye. I think she gave me way too much. And I think it's because I mentioned to her, well, first of all, I'm a redhead. And the old saying is that we're harder to anesthetize. So I think she gave me a lot extra. And she actually did inject my eye at one point. Oh, wow. Just for fun to see what it would do.
Starting point is 00:03:53 So, yeah, I don't feel this side of my face. And I raced in here, I swear to God, I was bombing down Shunshet Boulevard to get here fast before this. Shonset Boulevard. Well, I put a little English on the ball. Okay. But I bombed down here so that I could get here before it wore off because I just want the content. And I swear to God, I think my face looks a little shaggy on this shot. It does.
Starting point is 00:04:20 It does. I looked at you and I was like, something's off. Yeah, Sean's way off. Can you see you look at me straight on? Oh, yeah, a little bit. And you sound a little bit like Holly Hunter. You've got those extra-ash-ish and like a Connery Holly Hunter mix. Sean Connery and Holly Hunter had a baby.
Starting point is 00:04:37 And little James Stewart. A little, and I'm talking to James, do you know me? Do you know me, Mr. Gower? It's me. It's George Bailey. Knock, knock. Who's there? Dishes.
Starting point is 00:04:48 Dishes. Dishes. Who? Dishes, Sean Connery. Yeah. Knock, knock. Who's there? Dwayne who?
Starting point is 00:04:54 Dwayne the tub, I'm dwounding. Oh, no, this is the best ever. Knock, knock. Who's there? Go fuck yourself. I'm busy. Trying to jerk off in here. You didn't see that one coming, did you kids?
Starting point is 00:05:08 How's it guy supposed to jerk up? Are you aware that Dwayne is still in there with you? Oh, no! There's a dead guy in a tub while I'm jerking it. This mini play brought to you by Masterpiece Theater. as narrated by old mush-mouthed gonsion. Yeah, man, I really don't want this to go away.
Starting point is 00:05:31 I'm enjoying... You're alive. What's wrong with me that I raced out of the doctor's office? I know. There's a parking garage. I drove through the little arm. I didn't even pay. Shattered it and drove 90 miles an hour down
Starting point is 00:05:44 Sunset Boulevard. I was like, get out of the way! Well, my face is so mushy. I got to record. You cut through Central Park and we're not even in New York. We're not even in New York. bodies everywhere you know
Starting point is 00:05:55 good times good times and may this never wear off well let's get into it we got to tell us about our guest today and let me put on my glasses
Starting point is 00:06:03 oh no he's got sunglasses I got other regular glasses on but they're not as funny as these my guest today was a correspondent on the daily show and now stars in the Apple TV
Starting point is 00:06:17 plus series shrinking I'm thrilled she's here today Of course, when I talk to her, my face wasn't shut up with Nova Kane. Jessica Williams, welcome. I want to do a little backstory, which is I have, like a lot of people, been a fan of yours for a long time, and then there was an event that we did together, and we got to be together on stage, and it was a Broadway production.
Starting point is 00:06:51 Of Gypsy. Two in Gypsy? Yeah, we did it. It was so great. I went for it. For 15,000 people. Yeah. No, but we did this event together, and I had so much fun with you riffing.
Starting point is 00:07:06 Just we could finish each other's sentences. It was really fun. I walked off stage and I called my Booker Paula Davis and I said, why hasn't she been on the podcast? So you screamed at her? I screamed at her. And then I realized later on that I was. I was off my meds. And we had a terrible time.
Starting point is 00:07:25 And then they told me later on, all you did was scream at Jessica the whole time. Yeah. And then he made us go out and play the slots. Yeah, yeah, exactly. I was like, quarter me, quarter me. Quarter me. Where have you been?
Starting point is 00:07:38 I never heard that phrase before quarter me. Is it? It's not a phrase. It's got to be more than a quarter now, right? Of course it is. Like a tap, right? I don't gamble. Me either.
Starting point is 00:07:47 I don't know. And then is someone standing next to you with your quarters? and handing you the quarters that used to be you, and then it was David Hopping. And I'd say, quarter me and you'd give me like 15 quarters because that's what it costs now. But we were just talking, I mean, here's the thing.
Starting point is 00:08:04 I walked in the door, you got here just before me, and we start talking. There's no artifice. It's so easy to talk to you that we started getting into stuff right away that was really good. the next thing I know we were talking about how we'd love to take
Starting point is 00:08:22 like an Orient Express train ride all of us but there'd have to be a murder and then I remembered Sona was on a cruise where there was a murder and you want to hear about this. Yeah, that's my question
Starting point is 00:08:32 because sometimes I hear when there's a murder on a cruise they have to put them in the freezer or refrigerator somewhere. Yeah. What do you know? Tell me everything. I know well.
Starting point is 00:08:38 I care about that. And all the witnesses have to go in the refrigerator too. And we've talked to mention that she was the murder. Oh, it was you. Yeah. We were at dinner and then you could hear this.
Starting point is 00:08:47 Who's we? Who's we? Me, my husband, and then two of our friends who went on the cruises. This was in Alaska. And then a voice comes on the intercom. The entire cruise can hear it. And you go, all medical and security personnel to the ninth floor.
Starting point is 00:09:01 And you could hear the panic in their voice. And then we were like, oh, what's happening? But we didn't stop eating our dinner. Like, we thought we were like, it could be an active shooter. That's what they did in Titanic. They were like, oh, that sounds bad. Well, we've got two hours before we go under. So I'll have more of the veal.
Starting point is 00:09:21 And then we heard it again and you could see all the employees start to get worried. And then the next day we were docked and we were supposed to be still cruising. And the captain came on and he said, yesterday there was a domestic disturbance
Starting point is 00:09:35 and a woman from Utah has died. And then we were all searching and there were all these news stories. Her husband killed her. It's always the husband. And the security came in while he was dragging her body to the balcony to throw it overboard.
Starting point is 00:09:50 Security came in because I guess they heard the noise, you told me, and can you imagine they like pushed open the door, the door was open, they go in and the guy has her body halfway out the porthole window. And he's like, uh, I can explain. I was pulling her in.
Starting point is 00:10:07 She died. Then a bird pulled her out, and I'm trying to pull her back in. A bird? Insane. So he was caught. It's crazy. he was actually caught in a murder. I watch a lot of true crime and date line.
Starting point is 00:10:22 And it just never happens that they're caught right in the middle of it. That is so sad. And then, well, it got even sad. Like, the FBI came on board. They were interviewing people. And then we followed the story. He got convicted. And then he lost his appeal.
Starting point is 00:10:36 And then he killed himself in his jail cell. Wow. Wow. Oh, my God. Sorry. That's such a downer. That's what it happened. That's all the time we have, Jessica.
Starting point is 00:10:45 See you later. Thank you. I did my time. Thank you. You were pressure. Thank you. We just stopped it right there. It's exactly the way I imagined it.
Starting point is 00:10:55 We're going to get into more murder, but first, I want to say you were the youngest, I think still to this day, the youngest daily show correspondent ever. You were seven years old. I thought it was too soon. I was like, I'm that baby. I never understood. Your take on the news was terrible. Yeah, I know. I know.
Starting point is 00:11:16 It's always like, I'm tired. That's what my poopie daipy. My poopie dippy. You know, you'd be talking about like complex issues in the news that needed real, I'm sorry, I thought that was a little early for you. But that's the thing about John Stewart is he really push his satire. And that's what he's not. So when he saw first, nobody knows how I got it.
Starting point is 00:11:38 Like I remember I was auditioning. We're on Larchmont right now. Allison Jones casting office used to be here. I don't know if she's still here. But I was auditioning for something else. And it was a Will Ferrell movie. and they were looking for six-year-old. And I was like, and then Allison Jones was like,
Starting point is 00:11:52 you might not be right for this, but they're passing the Daily Show. Do you want to come back and put something on tape? And I was going to Cal State Long Beach at the time. That's where I went. You did? And did you do comedy sports? Yeah, I did comedy sports since high school.
Starting point is 00:12:02 What? Yeah. Do you grow up here? Uh-huh. Cool. Whittier? Yeah. Dude, everybody I know from Whittier is always like,
Starting point is 00:12:08 I'm from Whittier. Trust me. A day doesn't go by. I mean, I've been behind him. I've seen him at a traffic stop. True story. get out of his car and start shouting if the driver stopped behind him
Starting point is 00:12:22 waiting for the light to change I'm from Whittier. I'm not from that part of Whittier. I'm from Whittier. I'm from Whittier. I'm from Whittier. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Don't hurt me. Yeah, I'm from Torrance. Oh, my God, and she's from Hacienda Heights. Oh, cool. Yeah. Awesome. Hell yeah, locals. You know how many people from L'A. Yeah, I was born in Casas.
Starting point is 00:12:38 No, stop. D'Oblanco. What? Casa Del Blanco. Yeah, it's 40 minutes outside of Casitas Las Mucacacacacacacus. I'm telling you, we had a great air hockey team. Do you guys have air hockey in here? This office is really cool. You won't spring for it.
Starting point is 00:13:00 You know what? You know what I do remember? I remember when I was hosting the late night show, and we were always under so much pressure early on, like, we're going to get canceled. This isn't going to work. Oh, my God. And I think it was maybe the second or third Christmas when the nickel finally dropped that we were doing okay. There was really good press. The network seemed happy and Christmas
Starting point is 00:13:23 hit. And I was, you know, when you take off a backpack after a long hike, you feel like you can fly like you're floating. That's how I felt. And so we, I just started running around buying presents for everybody. And I remember, I was buying presents for all these people at the show and so full of joy. And we were doing our last show before the Christmas break. And we never used to get breaks. And then I went insane. I ran downstairs. and ran through the streets to a store, like a Brookstone, and bought a giant air hockey table that was bigger than I was. And I was carrying it down the street.
Starting point is 00:13:57 And people were like, I think Colonel Bryn's, he's got a giant box. And he's laughing, like a maniac. And I took it upstairs. And I went, hey, everybody, I got us air hockey. So it's so funny you would bring that up. But you actually did. I did. No, but didn't you bring it up?
Starting point is 00:14:13 Maybe. I don't know. I felt it. That was what happened in Vegas around the slots. But I love that feeling. I really like giving gifts. I really do. Especially, like, I like when you just, like, nail it.
Starting point is 00:14:24 Like, I love when you nail it. And that's, like, exactly the person you thought about it ahead of time. That's, like, the best feeling. Like, this year, I'm all about, like, a little pizza oven. So now I'm thinking about, like, I think this will come out after we wrap. But I think for my, like, glam team, I want to get them, like, little pizza ovens for their house. Wow, that is really nice. You know, because there's, like, the Gazzini and there's the Ooni now.
Starting point is 00:14:45 Have you thought of the solo? stove pizza. Yeah, those are cool. Do they still advertise with this? It's been a while. The solo stove? Oh, fuck the solo stove. You got it because they advertise? Why? People love a solo stove. First of all, I do
Starting point is 00:15:00 legitimately, I never, ever, I will never shill a product that I don't honestly believe. That I don't believe in. And I think those missiles are doing their job. Oh, boy. I'm constantly, our best advertiser is the Rand Corporation.
Starting point is 00:15:16 They make a missile. I mean, it kills everything. But no, the solo stove is, I do like it, and they do make a pizza oven that we have back here. But I'm saying this, hey, solo stove, if you wandered away from Conan O'Brien, you made a terrible mistake. But I think a pizza oven is a great idea. It's nice. It's nice. It's like they have, like, their houses that they're doing.
Starting point is 00:15:37 And I just built a pizza oven at my house. And I just used one of those DIY, like pizza oven kids. And I'll tell you, we used it for the first time a few weeks ago. joy of like putting a pizza in there and you're just like what it rises in 90 second like it's like you're laughing like we were like it felt like we were going to live forever we were doing it was so great i was like this is a mate like wow who knew that hate and dough you know it's like ancient yeah cut to ancient greeks stone age pre bronze age man heat plus dough but it is funny how removed we get Yes.
Starting point is 00:16:17 In our world, we have apps, we have all this stuff. And when someone really introduces us to, this is what a fresh orange tastes like, we lose our mind. What? This old time? Yeah. Like, had an orange starbursts. When someone explains to me kind of roughly how the planets move, I'm like, what? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:16:33 We've got to get the word out. It's crazy. It's crazy. The moon moves with us. Insane. I saw like a, you ever just catch a SpaceX launch and you were like, what the? You know, and they're like blasting like eight seconds. satellites in the air that you have no idea, like, what that is and why.
Starting point is 00:16:50 That's insane. This guy's just blasting satellites out into the, like, unregulated, like, just nonstop. He is a bond villain. He is a bond villain. He's a bond villain. It also feels like metaphorical the way he's like, forgive me, spreads his seed on Earth. It's like he's doing it in space. Yeah, like sploishing everywhere.
Starting point is 00:17:06 It's tough, man. He's colonizing. Massive erect rockets. Well, because they look so foul, like more than just a normal rocket. Yeah. And it calls them it's like cock one, cock two, cocking. We've had a failure of cock four, which, by the way, I've been there. Yeah, it's tough.
Starting point is 00:17:24 I want to ask you because... Cock four was tough. What's happening with me? I mean, at least you have four cocks. It was tough to see cock four go down. It was really a dark day for space travel. It's funny because I'm always curious when I'm talking to someone who I find effortlessly funny and real, okay, please tell me. Where does this come from?
Starting point is 00:17:47 What is your origin story? Your Marvel origin story? Who's showing you stuff when you're a kid? And what are you watching and what are you seeing? Yeah. My grandma was really into comedy. So she would watch you. She'd watch Conan.
Starting point is 00:17:58 She lived in the Valley. So she would let me stay up and watch stuff with her. She liked like early adult swim. She liked South Park. This is a cool. I mean, this is a very cool. Yeah. My grandmother, had she lived to be 120, would not have shown me space.
Starting point is 00:18:15 space ghost. Yeah, yeah. We watch a lot of space ghost. That's very cool. I know. Isn't that weird? And I could say I've watched Saturday Night Live, Mad TV. And she was kind of immobile because she was like diabetic and had a lot of health problems. She was like a Vegas lady. Like she lived really hard. Like Colt 45 every night, like smoked for a long time. Like she was like very crass. Like ah, like in a fun way. So it explained there was like a bodiness to her that I really like loved. So she, I think she really got in there. And then the year I tried out for comedy sports, my high school, improv team, I think she passed away. So that was when I started my my improv career. But aside from just loving comedy and always feeling like it was a valid medium, I'm just, I do think everything's kind of inherently interesting. And I think that I'm very curious about the way the world is. And I feel like I know a little bit about a lot of things. And it's interesting. And I also like when I'm talking to people finding out what they're interested in. It's like interesting to me when someone lights up about shoe shining or something. And so that's just kind of how I live my life, basically.
Starting point is 00:19:19 Well, that's what I got right away is genuine. You have that light of I want to know, I want to play, and combined with humility of, I don't know everything. There's a lot of stuff I don't know. And whenever someone comes into a room telling me how much they know, I know that they're not a smart person. Yeah, no, wisdom is you don't know anything. Yeah, wisdom is, the more you learn, the less you know.
Starting point is 00:19:43 That's right. And every few years I find I'm 35, every few years I find I look back and think, oh, I didn't know as much as I thought I did even three years ago. But there's something very comforting in like not being done. You know, there's something really on shrinking the show that I'm on. There is something really cool about watching Harrison Ford's arcs because this is a guy who's still in progress and there's something to like, you know, even somebody who's in his 80s is like still learning lessons. And there's something really comforting about. that. So I really care about that. I think I look at, I look at Harrison Ford that way. I look at Martin Short that way who I just saw in New York. I look at Steve Martin that way. I love looking at people who are from, you know, the generation ahead of me who they're killing it. They're trying things. They're up on everything. They're not calcifying. And I think that's the one thing I never wanted to do is be the person who's like, I don't know what this new comedy is. That's tough. I don't, you know, what is this tumor?
Starting point is 00:20:54 Making his faces, you know, I just think I'm always trying to, and it, you know, let's, I want to access. I get excited when I see new people being really funny, funny in ways that it never occurred to me. It makes me enthusiastic. That's the other thing. I don't, I think we were talking about this, too. I don't like pretension in comedy. Like, if there's, like, when I was coming up in comedy with all of the, like, companies that I did and whatever, they're, now in retrospect, there were, like, these guys that were just dicks about comedy, like, teaching me that I think about all these classes that I took where it was just like someone who really understands improv and sketch teaching class with being so mean. It's nothing worse than the young improv man.
Starting point is 00:21:36 Oh, my God. Like, so mean for no reason. And then when I got the Daily Show and I got to work with John, it was like a revelation of like, oh, you don't have to be a mean boss. Like you don't, you know, there's guys. I disagree here. I think cruelty has its place. Right, Eduardo? Sure.
Starting point is 00:21:57 I let you go a while ago, Eduardo. Eduardo's weeping. I don't know if you could say it. I also find there's something about, and it would be true for John on the Daily Show, I think it was true for me when there's a volume of work that needs to be done. Like, we've got to make these shows all the time. You find that when someone else has a good idea, when someone else can get the laughs, it doesn't cost me.
Starting point is 00:22:31 It's a rising sea that lifts all boats. Like, I'm good. I don't care who gets. And I think that is. I think sometimes, I mean, I haven't, I imagine that sometimes when there's very little space, like sometimes I saw bad behavior at Saturday night live because it's what, there's 20 shows a year, which when you think about it, if you take away the music, it's not a lot of real estate, a lot of people fighting to get their sketch on.
Starting point is 00:22:57 And if you've been working all week and you come in to see the board on Wednesday night to see if you got in or not, and your sketch is in the dead man's, the little index card has been moved to the bottom of the board. board, it's devastating. And so people, you know, there can be some sharp elbows because there's less space, I think. Yeah. And the turnover there is really crazy. You know, it's not just like, oh, you had a bad few weeks. It's like, oh, no, no, it matters my livelihood. You know, it's like, this is like our careers. You know, this is like something that, you know, we want to have sustainable jobs from this business. That would be really, really great. And I found that when I, I was at up our Citizens Brigade when I got the Daily Show. And it was sort of that thing where the next
Starting point is 00:23:38 move was either Saturday Night Live or The Daily Show. And, you know, both are great. I have friends who have done Saturday Night Live and been really happy with it. But for me, the Daily Show was a great fit because I'm really gentle and, like, very sensitive. And I needed, like, someone to be really nice to me. That's the only, I do way better with that. I think you made the right call. Yeah. You know, you never know, but I do really better. I do a lot better and people are nicer to me. I don't, I don't thrive when someone's, like, withholding. I also think, yeah, My guess would be a gig on the daily show as a correspondent means you will get on air. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:24:14 It's guaranteed. I think it's a very smart, obviously, clearly I can say it now because I'm armchair quarterbacking. But that is, I would like to think that's what I would have advised you to do because SNL, there are cast members who are there for a year and a half, but you didn't really see them much. They didn't get the time. They didn't. And there are people that have, that didn't work on SNL. And then went on, and I know one of your heroes is Julia Louis Dreyfus.
Starting point is 00:24:43 I mean, she technically, it didn't work out for her at S&L. And she's become one of the iconic comedians of all time. Veep, for my money, is one of, her performance in Veep is one of the most flawless things I think about it all the time. And the writing on that show. And it's so, it's just tight. It's tight and filthy. It's so mean. It's so filthy. I think about that performance all the time. The amount of like of nuance that she has for every single moment she's always listening. That's like the kind of actor I want to be. And that's I'm always like even I did like high school plays and stuff. And we, I had really great drama teachers. I'm like the product of a really good LAOSD drama program that was underfunded. But I had great performing arts teachers. And they would be like, If you think we can't see you back there because you're not in the front of the stage,
Starting point is 00:25:40 we're going to throw our sandals at you because you think we can't see you. You better freaking smile. I don't care, you know. This is the famous sandal technique. This is the L-A-U-S-D, like, sandal technique. But it still sticks with me to this day. And Julia's totally doing that. She's always listening.
Starting point is 00:26:00 I didn't catch that last part. But she, she, and the other thing that did say, very cool about her is that she doesn't, she's one of those people that doesn't know she's Julia Louis Dreyfus. Like if I, any time spent telling her how amazing she is at her work, she'd be like, what are we talking about here? You know, what do you think of this avocado? Oh, that's Harrison. That's Harrison. Yeah, exactly. Same as Harrison Ford. 100%. They're like people that have been famous for so long that it's like. Were you intimidated by Harrison Ford? Because when you first see him, it can be starring. It can be, well, you had that experience here on the
Starting point is 00:26:36 podcast where he walked in and he sat right in that seat and most like amazing actor of my lifetime he's the guy yeah yeah he's no he's the guy yeah anytime i think there's like you think of the guy you've got tom cruz kind of the guy like the movie star but weird guy tom cruise weird guy yeah harrison's weird too tom tom you know i'll say this too i'm gonna say something i've worked closely with tom cruise a bunch of times and spent like time with him when we were shooting something well so have i just so we're clear yeah me too I was a different... I was like, wait, I will believe you.
Starting point is 00:27:09 I'm new. That was Tomah Cruz. Oh, yeah. Oh, I went on the cruise to Tomas. Yeah, yeah. To the Isle of to St. Tom's. I see. No, Tom Cruise is incredibly, like, professional and also really nice to everyone on set.
Starting point is 00:27:24 I've only heard that. I don't know. No, he is. I would, I'm going to stick up for Tom Cruise here. Love it. He's, he's, he's, um, was just great. I was really impressed. And every time I've done something with him,
Starting point is 00:27:38 I've seen the same guy over and over and over again. But Harrison, there's something about, you know, I remember so clearly you weren't born yet. But when Star Wars came out, it was a cultural earthquake. I had never seen. There was so much explosion of fuss about this movie. And my brothers and I went and we saw it.
Starting point is 00:28:01 I had never seen anything look like that before. I was on the, you say, edge of your seat, total edge of my seat, floored. And then it kind of changed a lot of things. It was such a, and Harrison Ford is the one that I think he popped in this way that maybe even Lucas didn't expect. But like that first scene, I think, in the bar, he pops. And when he's bragging about the Millennium Falcon and he's a wise ass, he popped the way Clark Gable popped 30 years before the way Jimmy Cagney
Starting point is 00:28:38 he just popped as and that's the thing that's very cruel about movies movies say this is the person and it's Julia Roberts it's her and you can do everything you want and the camera will just say
Starting point is 00:28:51 nope it's that one you're okay but it's that one and that's Harrison Ford and it's been his our whole lives this is actually really perfect I've been thinking about this a lot because we watched
Starting point is 00:29:01 andor the last season of Andor Perfect. Yes. Oh, I love Andor. I love it. I love it. I'm glad you seen it.
Starting point is 00:29:09 I binged with my son. We binged both seasons. Hold on. You can jump in here. We did this. We binged both seasons with my wife. Diego Luna, I love, I'm very much passionately in love with Diego Luna. I love that.
Starting point is 00:29:24 He's the best. No, no. And I'm going to take this even further. I'm having surgery to be able to have a child with Diego Luna. It's very complicated. And we say this, very painful. Very pain. They don't put you under for that one.
Starting point is 00:29:37 No. Have you checked with him? Is he even in on this? I'm going to do this first. Okay. That's idea. Smart. And it's been suggested you're not the first one to say, hey, should you?
Starting point is 00:29:46 And I'm like, no, no, no, no. I want to go to him with everything ready to, you know. So that's my choice. This has been nine months of intense surgeries. Well, so we did, did you do this? We did Rogue One right after. Yes. And then we just started like all over again.
Starting point is 00:29:58 We just kept going. That's next. Oh, really? We did. That's living. You want. No, it feels good. No, it feels good.
Starting point is 00:30:05 One day you'll have the money to live this kind of life. You'll have the Disney Plus account to be able to be the shit. I spent it all on the cruise to Thomas in Spain. That was your mistake. You did the same thing. I mean, I watched both seasons, and I think it is, you know, I think my shows this year are severance and or for just craftsmanship. There's TV and then there's movies. The wall has fallen between them.
Starting point is 00:30:32 Yes, technically movie. No, they're so cinematic. Like, I love a ride. Yes. And I feel like Andor did such a good job with the sets and the locations and the specificity of, like, God, it just looked gorgeous. And it broke my heart 35 times and it elated me 36 times. Were you saying you liked it because it, like, blurred the line between the cinema? I loved that that writer, creator, creator is so talented.
Starting point is 00:30:57 And all their performers are so amazing. And as you said, they created these worlds. all of them seemed completely authentic. It was true to itself, meaning it would give you really bad news. It would give you good news. And that's everything a movie does. So now that commercials are no longer a part of these streaming shows, it's really the same magic. We used to go to movies because I'm going to give you money not to show me a commercial.
Starting point is 00:31:21 You can show some shit up front. But once Star Wars starts, you're not going to 15 minutes in go, you know, we've got a new soap for the cracks and pits and everywhere in between. Which, by the way, I don't... I hate when they're graphic. I hate when it's like... So you're like, I was sweating all over, even under my tit. You're like, what? Are you tired of tit odor?
Starting point is 00:31:44 But, you know, we're going to take a sidetrack here because those commercials are everywhere. They are. And they say things like, it's for pits and privates and well, assholes, too. And you're like, we get it. We're okay. You said enough. Did we used to have an ad for something like that here? Lux Badee.
Starting point is 00:32:02 Yeah, Lux Badee. A Badee is different. A Badee is like, we're the only ones. Americans are the only ones that are the only ones that will use badees. We should have more badees, I think. But this whole, they got to come with a war. I'm watching basketball. Yeah, go ahead.
Starting point is 00:32:13 And this is like, my tits reek. And you're like, okay. And then also, don't tell them. Don't tell who. Don't tell everybody else our tits reek. It's kind of weird. But they double down on it, too. They keep doubling down and they'll say,
Starting point is 00:32:30 and you'll say, no, no, I really get it. And then later in the ad, they'll say, and remember the taint. This small area, each to one inch and a half, between genitals and asshole. Yep. When you're stinks. And I'm horrified.
Starting point is 00:32:49 What's happened? I asked, I was thinking about Harrison and I, a couple months ago. I was like, dude, what's your tits like? he's like what uh no i asked him i was like i liked and or so much we were in the middle i was like have you seen andor and he's like what i was like have you seen and he's like what is that and i was like um it's this thing where it's like and he was like no i would never he's like i would never watch it's like i would never watch it's like i would never watch it's like i don't want to talk about this you're anymore at all you're hon's solo he doesn't need it yeah when i watched him again while because we're still in production for the show we're like finishing up it was so surreal to see this like guy is so deeply hot in star he's just so deeply hot and star he's just It's just so, he pops in that way. And I cannot believe in my insane, goofy career that I get to work with this guy. And a couple Fridays ago, there was a really tender scene that we shot for season three.
Starting point is 00:33:41 That was just he and I. And I stayed to, like, run lines with him while they were setting up the scene. And it was a big, it was a big scene between our characters. And he just, the whole crew was silent, which is what happens when it's like they know it's a big scene. And he's, like, coming into my character's office and he's sitting across, like, as far as Conan is. And he walks in and he sits and he does this scene. And it was like, almost like, you know, in Oppenheimer, when the blast actually goes off and they put on their glasses and it's, like, silent. It was that.
Starting point is 00:34:15 And he was destroying, he was, like, absolutely destroying the scene in every way. Like, every single line, he was weeping, he was joyful, he was all of those things. but it was one of those moments where they had to come in and be like, okay, Jessica, you're like weeping. So I don't know if you'd be weeping as the care. I was like, no, this guy is giving me. Like, this guy is the best. He's the goat.
Starting point is 00:34:39 And I see a lot of great, I've seen a lot of great actors. But it was one of those moments where I just felt like, no, this is actually like the greatest living actor. And this is someone that I get to work with. But it was like being too close to a fire. It was insane. And I work with him all the time. But it was like chill. Like I was getting chills while he was doing it.
Starting point is 00:35:02 And I think you'll know the scene when you see it. But it was like very like, what did I get to do in my life to be here to work with this guy? It's insane. Do you have the number of your surgeon? Because I might want to get that. Oh, right? And you're going to be away. Turns out he's not that good.
Starting point is 00:35:20 No, no. There's been some infections. It was crazy. But, you know. It's interesting is I have learned, I've had the same feeling of how did this get to happen for me. And I'm learning, I'm quite a bit older than you. I've learned over time to just my grandfather, who was a traffic cop in Worcester, Massachusetts in the 1920s and 30s. He used to have this saying.
Starting point is 00:35:49 He was kind of like W.C. Field when he was old. He was really funny. Was W.C. Fields, sorry. Thank you. I think one of the great comics. My little chickadee. Oh. He was always playing.
Starting point is 00:36:03 It's, I know. Is it kind of loony-toonsie? It sounds like chickity. He feels a little loony tunes. Run along, kid, you bother me. Yeah, okay. Yeah, I'm with you. He worked with, you know, May West.
Starting point is 00:36:14 Everything I'm saying is digging this. I'm old reference. But I do think people should know W.C. Fields because he might be one of my favorite comedians of all time. Really? And his stuff is as funny today as it was in. the 30s, 40s, and... Amazing.
Starting point is 00:36:30 So, anyway, he was this kind of had all these sayings and used to say, take what you can get and ask for more. Like, he was going against the Catholic, I don't deserve this, I shouldn't have this. Oh, who me? He was like, when something good comes your way, take it. Yeah. You know, and I think you've grab it and just take it because there's some trouble coming down the road at some point. So just enjoy this. We're all going to die.
Starting point is 00:36:55 I don't have a way around that. Yeah, you have a surgeon. Yeah, I have a surgeon for that, too. I think I'm going to keep this and put it on my core, but I'm going to write, do you mind if I write WC Field so I don't forget. Cool. Can I say just from, what is this? Oh, that's screwing.
Starting point is 00:37:09 Calligraphy. No, it's just, it's just, it's a ink pot. That's an expensive pen. It's a nice pen. Do you like expensive pen? This is a $20-something dollar pen, which is, you know, not a big pen. Can I try it? Yeah, I really love it.
Starting point is 00:37:22 You use this the most? I draw and scribble all the time. And I love that and it has little cartridges. Anyway, I should do it. Kaleko. Kaleiko. And a special pad. Conan, stop it.
Starting point is 00:37:39 Send her voice not helping. In her voice too late. Hey, I have a question for you. I have a question for you, which is there's this path people like us that have this affinity for comedy where you're going along, you're doing stuff. And then there's a hard right and a hard left. Stand up or improv. I don't know about you because I think you'd be, but you chose, I'm guessing you chose improv to the exclusion of, that's what I did. I kind of knew, I really love great stand-ups.
Starting point is 00:38:07 I admire what they do. I'm fascinated by it. I'm always telling John Mullaney, I don't know how you do that. I really have great respect for them, but I always knew my thing is over here where I'm in scenes and I'm babbling in the moment. Yeah. Yeah, I have that too. I like, like, if we were in school and it was like doing an exam and I had to do like an essay in an exam as opposed to like an ABC, like I would do an essay and just get like an A plus plus on it because I could like bullshit my way through and figure it out and just babble, babble, babble. But I started in high school doing improv because we had an improv team like the layout of comedy sports is or they used to just have high school teams.
Starting point is 00:38:51 Like you would have a football team and then you would play whose line is it anyway. against different. It's so weird to make it competitive, but also... It was fake competitive. Yeah, it was like for the sake of the audience. It's more so you're just doing the short form style thing. Right. But I loved acting in scenes.
Starting point is 00:39:07 I knew I wanted to be an actor. Yeah. And then I learned, oh, I have an improv team and this is a way I could go. And then I just kind of stuck with that. But I like the teams. Like, I like, you know, stand-up is very, like, isolated and in your head and you're working out bits and then you're presenting them. And that's so vulnerable to me that it kind of scares me quite a bit.
Starting point is 00:39:27 And I do admire stand-ups. But with improv and sketch and then with acting, like, I knew I wanted to do that. And what I, I didn't know what the path was for that exactly because I didn't want to be, like, a lifelong sketch person. But being able to fold that into my acting technique is really helpful. And so even at the daily show, I got that when I was 22, so it felt like I was college, like, in grad school. because I was learning so much and I didn't finish school and I was working with all these writers
Starting point is 00:39:56 and field producers so we were not only that but then I was traveling kind of doing that man on the street or sitting in someone's living room and interviewing them saying like we should all eat babies like I don't know stuff like that
Starting point is 00:40:07 like interviewing people you know face to face doing those field pieces but that was really We should all eat babies There's a lot of them and they're nutritious Yeah And yeah
Starting point is 00:40:19 So the baby eaters I would like interview them But I learned, and then we would have to go back and edit these things for a couple weeks to the taste of mostly one man, which was John. So then I learned how to produce. So it became a bit more amorphous where I didn't realize this, but I was like co-producing and co-directing these little bits. And so I learned so much about storytelling in that way. It is great training if you're ever going to host a late night show. I don't know if there are going to be more of those in the future.
Starting point is 00:40:48 but if you're going to host something and interview people, that is improv. It's listening, responding, don't go negative, don't stop the flow. Don't make it about you. Oh, no, I disagree with that. Don't make it about you. Jessica, Jessica, the one thing I've learned in this talking to you is that I'm an impressive guy. But I do. And that I'm from El Cacho nachos.
Starting point is 00:41:15 El Cacho Nachos. You're Peggy Hill Spanish from my kids. of the hill where it's like, boom. But yeah, no, acting, when I'm in the zone, is just reacting, 100%. And even with the daily show, sometimes with a field piece, you can just get out with a look. Like, if I can just get out with like a, like a Jim Halpert, like, I love it. You can say so much. And so I really, like, for me, acting is natural listening.
Starting point is 00:41:41 And Julia is perfect at that we're talking about, especially in Veep. I mean, she did it in Elaine, as a little. Elaine and Seinfeld. She did it throughout her career, all these different shows, all these different things. But, you know, she's always in it completely 100%. And it's commitment. Just commitment. Oh, I believe in commitment. Commitment. I hate half-ass bullshit. I hate it. And it works for some people. I know. Those are small. Eduardo's watching. What football match are you watching? Come on, Edward. We busted him recently.
Starting point is 00:42:15 Why? Were you watching something? I was watching the soccer. Let him watch it. Oh, we, you know, it's great content. Let him watch it. He's got to listen to you guys. But you know what? We only knew because someone sitting next to him sold him out.
Starting point is 00:42:26 He's next to the bit. Commitment to the bit. Betrayal of a good friend. Same diff. But I don't like like half-ass stuff. I don't like cool comedy. I don't like cool. We were talking about that.
Starting point is 00:42:38 I like earnestness 100%. And I've, comedy sports was really earnest. And that got, you know, it's not like UCB is cool. And I'm a UCB person. So it's totally fine. But yeah. But there is. is, like, sort of a punkness about UCB that's different than, like, groundlings and
Starting point is 00:42:51 comedy sports is the goofiest dorky's one. It's so dorky. Why would it get, why would it get flak? It's really franchise. It's gimmicky and, yeah. It's kind of the Disneyland of, it's clean. A lot of church people would come to comedy sports. It's really clean.
Starting point is 00:43:06 They pass a plate afterwards. Yeah. Well, truly, if you actually, if you like set a curse word or something, you get a brown bag file, the ref would put a brown bag. Oh, my. Okay. That wouldn't work well here. But, and you know what's funny is I used to think, like, because it was so not cool,
Starting point is 00:43:22 especially coming up in, like, the UCB hey day. I was like, man, I've done some comedy sports since I was in high school that I didn't learn anything. Like, I was like, oh, this is just some bull that I do. But no, I learned so much. It teaches you to be tight on what your tools are limited there. Yeah, four minutes. You play with different people like. Stage time.
Starting point is 00:43:41 I mean, time in the cockpit. Yeah. Yeah. The answer. And the thing that when you. couldn't use foul language taught you, you had to be funny, you couldn't have a crutch and stuff. Yeah. So now I can like act.
Starting point is 00:43:51 I mean, we say fuck on the show a lot. But I can turn it on and turn it off. And also that what's great about comedy sports is there's like this respect for the audience. You want to give them like a really premium experience. Whereas other things is like, hey, welcome. We're going to do this. We're going to do some make them up. It's kind of a suggestion.
Starting point is 00:44:08 But comedy sports is like, hello. Yeah. This is the thing that we're going to do. Right. Right. And it teaches you like in order to satire or something, you have to love it as a. opposed to satirring something and just coming from this, like, look at this stupid show. You know, it taught me earnestness in a way that I'll continue to have forever.
Starting point is 00:44:25 You know, it's a good lesson. I'm not afraid to try stuff. Did you study theater at Cal State Long Beach? No, no, I didn't. I was doing a Pisces Brigade. I, like, convinced my parents to let me go to Kelsey at Long Beach half, like, part-time, and then let me do UCB classes in comedy sports. You know what's funny? You did exactly the right thing. Really?
Starting point is 00:44:42 Which. I made a presentation. I think I made a PowerPoint presentation. Oh, really? Mother, father, you know, click. I was like, so this is the Mount Rushmore of Upright Citizens Brigade. Amy Poehler, Matt Wall. Like, I was, like, explaining to my, like, black parents from Ohio, like, what this
Starting point is 00:44:57 Up Price Citizens Brigade thing was. And at the time, it was like, Aziz Ansari. I'd see, like, Rob Heuble, Derek Comedy, which was Donald Glover's old, you know. I would see, like, Ben Schwartz, like, all these really cool, funny people that everybody knows. And I just was like, oh, this is where I need to be. It was like, people were standing. It was so electric. But you knew, when you know something you know, and I do think go to where they're doing the thing that you love, even if it means, okay, I'm getting paid 50 cents.
Starting point is 00:45:30 Oh, yeah. But so I've got to do these other things to keep it going. But go where they're doing the thing that you love. And if that means you're not even in Santa's workshop, you're outside, but you're talking to some of the elves. And every now and then you get to go, I don't know, I'd paint them. that choo-choo train a little, you know, and whatever. And then eventually you're in there and then eventually. It's just being around.
Starting point is 00:45:51 Yeah. Yeah. It's being around and showing up. So even then, I remember I was doing the comedy sports. And then I was doing, you know, UCB. And I remember sleeping in my car, like in between shows and going to auditions. And it was a really special time. I'm just laughing because I remember I have such a clear memory of taking this booking.
Starting point is 00:46:12 Someone saw me do improv. And I was maybe 22, 23. And they said, we want you to be in this infomercial. And it was shot deep in the valley. It was for a company that made music, that it was for an association of musical instrument salespeople. And they wanted me to be one of the players. So I drove, I had a terrible car that I bought at the airport.
Starting point is 00:46:35 It's called it in 1970s, Isuzu Opel that was literally falling apart. And it had an I heart, my poodle sticker on the back that I tried to get off. And I scraped some of it off. and the bumper was coming with it. And I'm like, forget it. I'm just going to leave it on. But I remember knowing so little that they said, yeah, you're going to do this thing
Starting point is 00:46:53 and take care of your own makeup. I didn't know what that meant. So I went to a drugstore and bought one of those powder things with makeup on it. And I remember getting up at four in the morning, driving forever east of L.A., like past mountains and stuff to find this place. And this is before you could geolocate off a satellite
Starting point is 00:47:13 or use your Apple. maps or whatever. So I had this big thick book of maps called the Thomas Guide. I went way out there and I parked in the parking lot half an hour before I was needed and took out my one little puff and I'm looking in it. My skin is not a perfect
Starting point is 00:47:29 and I'm like gloop, gloop. I went in and I think if you looked at it now, a book they found a body and they made it look like it's talking. But I did that because I thought this is my way. That's right. This is my way. Yeah, and it was that day, you know. Also doing things
Starting point is 00:47:45 that fail like failing a lot of times like I did so much bad stuff just to see I can't identify with anything yeah yeah okay okay everybody after home run everybody loved it yeah no it's just doing bad but that is good to just stay connected to this has gone badly and it has gone well and that's always going to be the case and calibrating like you know what was nice too about the daily show is john john would let me calibrate he would you know you worked in late night it's like it goes up because we need it up you know and then we'll we'll tack it the next day we'll do another show You know, one of those days, throw it, you know, throw it up. So I learned that.
Starting point is 00:48:19 But then also I learned, oh, that didn't necessarily work. Oh, that didn't. But John wouldn't say anything. He wouldn't, like, berate me. He wouldn't send me notes. And I'd had up into that point a lot of comedy teachers who did. He just sort of let me figure it out. And he was just kind of the teacher I needed at that time.
Starting point is 00:48:38 It really worked for me. Well, I don't agree with John that you should. I think berating has its, It's how it's done. And I think vicious notes work. Vicious. But I'm going to say passive aggression. Oh.
Starting point is 00:48:52 That is a wonderful, long jokes about how the sketch didn't work. I have gone way over time with you because you are intoxic. You're great. I'm just great to talk. Intoxicating. You are. No, no, I'm saying. I'm saying this has been so effortless and fun.
Starting point is 00:49:14 and natural, and then I put a red light up, like, 10 minutes ago, like, well, this is usually Oh, that's what that is. I saw that. That was a long time. That was more than 10 months ago. I think it was. We went way over, and it's because this is what I experienced when we did that thing together. I was just like, oh, her, more time with her, please. Yeah. It's getting creepy. I'll come back any time. I'll come back any time. More time with her, please. I don't think it's creepy More time with her, please. I'm going to let you, next time we talk, I have to talk to you about you are quite tall. And I'm wondering, that's got to have influenced your...
Starting point is 00:49:49 It's crazy. Let's talk about it real quick. It's crazy you said that to me because you're like the tallest guy. I'm the tallest man that I ever liked, yes. But when I saw you in person, I was like, oh, my God, he's tall, you know? And it was nice, though. It was more comforting. Is your wife tall?
Starting point is 00:50:03 She's tall. Yeah, she is. But she's not like me. That would be wrong. I don't know why it would be wrong. Are your kids tall? My son is quite tall. He's a little taller than me.
Starting point is 00:50:15 Wow. Yeah, but we live near a nuclear reactor when he was coming home. And he has super strength. Sevenths his power plant? Yeah. Cool. I'm scared of him.
Starting point is 00:50:25 Yeah, you should be. It turns green when he gets mad. Was there something you're going to say about me being tall? No, I was going to say it. I have heard women that are tall say, oh, it was awkward for me. earlier on. And I think that's too bad because I just, I think, own it. It must be, you know, own it. And if you're taller, oh, you had to grow into it. People, we have these beauty standards
Starting point is 00:50:51 based on what's repeated in the media. And we develop this view based on where we live about the way people are supposed to look. And whatever you're exposed to is what people think is right. And so you're like a six foot tall black lady. You're like, oh, I look different than what's on TV. And so develop like this, you know, normal 13, 14-year-old complex, which is what I had. Yeah. And I was tall. That was tall early. I had, like, 13.
Starting point is 00:51:14 And it did, but it informed so much of who I am. It made me, I don't know what it did, but it's something that, as I got older, I was really happy. Especially, I knew I wanted to be an actor when I was a kid. I didn't see a lot of tall, tall actresses, maybe Sigourney Weaver. I feel like Queen Latifah might be pretty tall. But there's not, like, a ton. No.
Starting point is 00:51:35 So it always felt really weird. And it used to be like a death sound. for an actress because it meant that the male lead, like Alan Ladd, had to stand on six Appleboxes. Oh, my God, one of those stories. Harrison's always like, I used to be on contract at this studio and I made a hundred bucks a week. Like, he's crazy a story. And I'm like, shut up.
Starting point is 00:51:56 He's not over it. Oh, he's not over it. Jerry Tchaikovsky was the guy that told him he needed to get an Elvis haircut. And he was like, Jerry Tukovsky. And I'm like, yeah, that sounds like a rough day in 1968. But I think it all went your way. I will say it made me like in comedy like, God, that man is not over it. It's funny that you guys heard about that too.
Starting point is 00:52:14 But guess what? We all have our stuff. That's right. But it doesn't matter who you are. It's Tom Cruise, Harrison Ford. I don't care, you know, Tom Hanks, you pick the people at the very top. I mean, presidents are like, God damn at the time that, you know, Iowa didn't go my way. Like, you were the president. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:52:32 Oh, yeah. But they don't, no one does. Yeah. But I think with comedy, it made me feel. like equal to men that I was playing against. Like it always made me feel not as boopy because I was like, I don't know how to describe it, like not as cute in a way that I'm like, I'm just a baby doing baby things.
Starting point is 00:52:51 It was like, even though that's how I got on the Daily Show, it was like, I felt like, oh, I'm taller than these guys, so I'm just going to, it informs my presence. Well, that's the way you hold yourself. You hold yourself as someone who is comfortable in your, you know, comfortable in your body, comfortable in your skin, like comfortable being you. And so to me, that's the key to everything.
Starting point is 00:53:11 And the flip side's true, too. Like someone like Sabrina Carpenter is like, yeah, I'm whatever she is, 5-1. She's like, yeah, that's who she is, yeah. That's who I am and no one's complaining. Yeah. Have you ever interviewed her? Like, I would love to see you guys standing next to each other. No, that would be fun.
Starting point is 00:53:25 That's a good one. So you don't want me to interview, you just want me to stand next to. Like it's a circus attraction. Come see Sabrina Carpenter stand next to the Wonder Freak, Coralabayan. Very small versus very tall. The singer and the guy with the zinger. Okay.
Starting point is 00:53:41 Wow. I'm going to shut it down. Okay. And seen. Oh, my God. Love it. It was absolutely a joy talking to you. Come on back.
Starting point is 00:53:49 Say hi to everyone at shrinking. And thank you for sharing your glow with us. Thank you. Intoxicating. Intoxicating. Thank you. This is a bit of an older post on Reddit, but a user on Reddit named Earn Payow did a replica of our studio and all of us built out of Lego. Oh, that's so cool.
Starting point is 00:54:20 We're going to bring it up here on the screen and you can go to At Team Coco Podcasts or, of course, watch this on YouTube. Oh, that is very good. But it's very accurate. Look at this. Oh, my God. It's got Eduardo's cap. It's got Blay and his prematurely gray hair. This is really good.
Starting point is 00:54:37 It's got my need to be heard. Yeah. But somehow, for some reason, your Haley Bieber smoothie is on my table. I know. Oh, it is. Green chairs? This is really good. I love this.
Starting point is 00:54:52 This person is very talented. How do you get Conan Lego hair like that? That's perfect. Where does that come from? Is it possible that he manufactured this hair? Maybe. Because look at Sonas hair. It's actually made of the same stuff that Sonas hair is made of.
Starting point is 00:55:04 You know what? No, that's a compliment. Your hair is very, it's full and thick and very made of plastic. Lego. You're wearing the same exact color jacket. I know, I'm wearing a brown jacket. Look, my t-shirt.
Starting point is 00:55:19 This is random. I didn't know we were doing this today. I am wearing the exact same color scheme. Wow. How do we get Lego to actually make this? Or get this guy to send us one of these or three of these. Yeah, we need to have this. I want one of these.
Starting point is 00:55:34 Well, okay, all right. Come down. I love Lego. I don't we get. I do too. I would like one as well, but I think it's a little greedy to go from how can we get one to how can we get nine. I said three. Eduardo has a hat on.
Starting point is 00:55:47 Yeah. That's cool. Nice touch. I think this is fantastic. I love how artistic our fans are. Yeah. I think this shows a lot of ingenuity. It's so good.
Starting point is 00:55:57 Look, it's great. There's more pictures, too, of you scroll through. There's some close-ups and stuff. Okay. I feel like you guys are big Lego people, the two of you. I love. Lego. And I've built some impressive Lego stuff. My son and I want, I think it was during COVID. I built, what I built? I built. I built a, like a range rover, land rover kind of thing out of Legos. And my son built like a Bugatti. Like, we just got these two kits. Yeah. It was COVID, man. And we built them. I got that Aston Martin and COVID, that Lego, Aston Martin. You know the James Bond. Yeah. That's right. What do you guys, do you guys just like, after you build it, you're like, okay. a display piece. It's nice to have that. Okay.
Starting point is 00:56:38 Then it's a real chick magnet. Oh, is it? Yeah. Oh, I've gotten. Oh, look at it. There's a little drying. Oh, my God. The doodle. Look at the drawing. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Look what it's on Sona. Her phone. Look at in front of Sona's phone. Look at that. She's playing like, what is that, what is that, candy crush or something? I don't know what that. And I have a coffee, a big tea mug or you, that's your tea mug. That's so cool. Oh, my God. Oh, wait a minute. We just, I didn't even think about this. There's a bubble of me talking about my Lego Astin Martin.
Starting point is 00:57:08 And look how evil you look. Look how you have, you have, you're malintentioned. People say I look like that actor Michael Stoolbarg, and that does look like Michael Stoolberg. Who's that actor? He's in Cone Brothers movies. He looks like my older brother. He's the dad and call me by your name, isn't he?
Starting point is 00:57:24 Yes. Okay. Yeah, I see it. Yeah. Oh, look at this. There's-look at Adam. Adam's just evil. I know.
Starting point is 00:57:33 It's like bizarre. Adam's like, I don't see me. How is this? We're not earning enough. How do we monetize that? This is great. You've got to check this out. Go online.
Starting point is 00:57:48 Look at these pictures. It's really beautiful. We should try and acquire at least one or two, whatever, if we can. I just want to make sure I get one for my own. All right. Well, I just meant for display here at our Larchmont offices so the talent visiting it can see it.
Starting point is 00:58:02 Look at the mini-fix. Oh, look at us. We're so cute. What if we come to find out this? This is all just 3D design it. It doesn't really exist. It might not exist. It could not exist.
Starting point is 00:58:10 Hey, maybe we don't exist. That's likely. We're probably three years away from them taking the essence of this podcast, running it through AI and then generating deep fakes that are us. Yeah. And they eliminate us. Yeah. We're turned into some kind of grouting for a bathroom. Wait a minute.
Starting point is 00:58:24 Blaze wearing the back to the future clothes. Did you notice that? Oh, yeah. Oh, I thought those were muscles. No. I thought he just was totally ripped. Hey, those were weird muscles. Someone's got a French tuck.
Starting point is 00:58:35 Yeah, Sonno, what's going on with your belt? I have a French tuck right now. I'm French tuckie. This guy gets all the details. He knows what? Hey, you know what he's missing? One thing, my prominent eye vein. Sorry.
Starting point is 00:58:48 Why would you want to make a note about that? Oh, look at my little smirk. You look like an asshole. I look like a bully. You know what I look like Scott Farkis. Yes, you do. You do. What is it?
Starting point is 00:59:02 Christmas story. Christmas story. Yeah. Look at that. Look at that asshole. What are you going to do? Cry. Oh my God.
Starting point is 00:59:13 That's cool. We do have really great fans. They're very creative. We have the most creative fans and thank you. This gentleman's name? Well, his username is Earn Pau
Starting point is 00:59:24 and sorry it took us a long. Could be a man? Yeah, could be. Sorry, I took to us. I mean, Legos is probably man. Sorry it took us this long to get to it. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:59:35 It was just. alerted to it. He said smash the Legos out of bitterness. I spent forever on that and they never responded to me. He's moved on. He's now making Duck Dynasty Legos. Will he still get back to me? And listeners,
Starting point is 00:59:49 you can go to at Team Coco Podcasts on Instagram and see this or the YouTube page. Well, thank you very much. Very cool. Conan O'Brien needs a friend with Conan O'Brien, Sonam of Sessian and Matt Gourley. Produced by Matt Goorley.
Starting point is 01:00:07 Executive produced by Adam Sacks, Jeff Ross, and Nick Leow. Theme song by The White Stripes. Incidental music by Jimmy Vivino. Take it away, Jimmy. Our supervising producer is Aaron Blair, and our associate talent producer is Jennifer Samples. Engineering and mixing by Eduardo Perez and Brendan Burns. Additional production support by Mars Melnick.
Starting point is 01:00:30 Talent booking by Paula Davis, Gina Battista, and Britt Con. You can rate and review this show, on Apple Podcasts and you might find your review read on a future episode. Got a question for Conan? Call the Team Coco hotline at 669-587-2847 and leave a message. It too could be featured on a future episode. You can also get three free months of SiriusXM when you sign up at SiriusXM.com slash Conan.
Starting point is 01:00:55 And if you haven't already, please subscribe to Conan O'Brien needs a friend wherever fine podcasts are downloaded. Thank you.

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