Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend - Recessive Elegance

Episode Date: October 6, 2022

Conan chats with Molly from Collingwood, Ontario about working as a model, being paid to plant trees, and whether they might be related. Wanna get a chance to talk to Conan? Submit here: TeamCoco.com/CallConan

Konan O'Brien needs a fan. Want to talk to Konan? Visit teamcoco.com slash call Konan. Okay, let's get started. Hi there, Molly, meet Konan and Sona. Hi, it's so nice to meet you guys. Can you guys hear me okay? Yeah, we hear you great.

Molly, how are you? I'm great. Tell us a little bit about yourself. Where are you coming to us from? Well, I'm calling you from my hometown of Collingwood, Ontario, Canada. So I'm Canadian. Oh, hey, Canada has always been quite kind to me.

So I love Canadians. I think they're great. I can give you a brief description of my town. Okay. So we're on Georgian Bay, which is just connected to Lake Huron. And about 10 minutes from my town is the village of Blue Mountain,

which is this little ski resort area. And there's not much nightlife. It's a little sleepy town, like because it's cottage country. So a lot of people come here on weekends. And we have just one bar that everyone goes to called Gibson & Company. And then behind it is our local dive bar with,

we have Buck Hunt there. I know you guys. Oh, yes. That's fantastic. Wait a minute. Yes. First of all, do you go there often? Is that where you hang out?

Yeah, my sister and I go there all the time. Okay. So if Gourley, Sona and I randomly showed up at this place on any night, just randomly, there's like what, an 80% chance we'll run into you and your sister? Yeah. And we'll be playing Buck Hunt, you know?

Yeah. That's crazy that you're always there. What is it you do? Are you a student? No, no. I mean, I'm there when I'm home, but right now I'm living in New York City. Oh, you live in New York?

Okay. So you're just visiting the family? Yeah, I am right now. And what do you do in New York? I'm a fashion model, so I've been doing that for a long time. I have to say, I was going to say, if you're not a fashion model,

you should probably be a fashion model. If only because you have a bunch of clothes on the back behind you. Yeah, it has nothing to do with the fact that you are very attractive. Yes. You're very beautiful. Thank you.

And you must hear that all the time. How did you get into fashion modeling? I was just approached on the street when I was super young and my parents said, oh, this is a little weird. This guy, you know, walking up to us and saying, your daughter should model. What guy?

The guy just came up to you when you were 15. Was it you? Wait a minute. When I came up to you, I really did think you could make it as a model. Was it the minister of fashion? Because of the minister of fashion? No, but I'm curious.

So that's, I mean, that's what you always hear. That someone's working at a checkout counter or they have some kind of, they're just walking through life and someone stops them. I asked this because I have walked around constantly my entire life waiting for someone to stop me and say, you, sir, should be a model. And I want to tell you something, Molly.

It never happened. I'm surprised it didn't because I'm working with long legs and red hair as well. Yeah. Let me explain something to all our listeners. It looks so much better on Molly. Yeah, sure, Molly. Yeah.

Wow. Okay. Well, incredible. Well, how tall are you? I'm 5'10". Oh, wow. Okay. All right.

All right. So you started modeling pretty young and then, what, do you travel the world modeling? How much modeling have you done? Yeah. I started when I was 15, 16 years old. Asia when I was 16. I lived in Shanghai and Singapore.

I've lived all over Europe, Turkey, Greece. I went to Milan and London. Wow. What a great experience. I want to model. And then I just got my visa for the States. So this is really big for me. Good.

Congratulations. And I just signed with a big agency there. Oh, you did? Yeah. Wow. What kind of, can you tell us like if, where would we encounter, like if we're saying, where would we see your face? What would it be?

What catalogs? What, what magazines? What kind of shoots? Buck Hunt monthly? Yeah. I know. There's like Buck Hunt girls. I get Buck Hunt monthly and I've, I haven't seen you yet.

I've seen Clem and, and Enos and Jedediah. But I have not seen you Molly. Yeah. My clients always ask me, what's your dream job? And I say, I want to be a Buck Hunt girl. You know. Well, I think you could probably make that happen. I think you could get any job you wanted.

Like who needs Prada and Gucci when there's Buck Hunt? No, but I, you know, I just shoot a lot of campaigns for, you know, different brands. I just shot for champion. I worked for Eddie Bauer. I've done like a Samsung commercial, you know, and in, in Canada, it's a really commercial market here. So I love like the acting side of it.

And I'd love to go into acting. But yeah, just mostly online stores. You know, it's interesting because I have just through my line of work, if you had told me before I got into this whole line of work that I'm doing that modeling was difficult or at all arduous, I would have laughed. I would have said, what are you talking about? That looks like the easiest job in the world.

But Sony, you'll back me up. Whenever I've had to be part of a photo shoot and they want me to smile and they're, you know, they're taking pictures for anything, any article or any kind of publicity that I've been doing over the 30 years that I've been doing this, there comes a point where I go, damn, this is not fun. This is not fun the way you'd think it would be fun. It's, there actually is.

And I can't describe why it's difficult, but it is. Yeah. I know. I don't know why it is either. I just, I've been doing it so long that it's become like second nature for me. And when I work, I've worked other jobs in my life. So I just compared that to whatever else I've done.

And it is easier, I have to say, than, you know, working a minimum wage job or during the pandemic, I went tree planting. So that was super hard. Wait, what was, what do you mean you went tree planting? Is this, So it's like a job in Canada that you can do. You can go up north and plant trees for nine cents a tree.

It's like piecework. I wanted to do something that was kind of outside of modeling. When everything shut down. And so yeah, I went up north with my best friend and That's so funny. If I had to describe what's the opposite of modeling, I would say agriculture. I really would.

Yeah. I mean, I'm not even joking, but well, first of all, that sounds like a very, I mean, 2000 trees a day. Is that what you do in this tree planting? Close to, yeah. But that was just me, you know, some of the boys, like some of the stronger guys would plant 4,000. Yeah, but half of those died.

They're not being careful. So you'd make what $180 a day. Is that right? Yeah, close to. That's pretty good. Yeah, but you thing is you're planting trees, which is such an amazing thing to do. I mean, I think if everybody,

if they figured out a way that everybody on earth could plant like four trees a day. Yeah. Well, then we'd have to water them and we don't have the water. Oh. Okay, this is getting grim. Well, anyway, I think it's really great what you did. I think it's, I think that's very cool.

I think that's your. Thank you. Yeah. I went a little crazy up there, like because you're, you're, you're in a piece of land on your own for like eight hours a day, you know, a helicopter would fly by every day and every day I'd make the same joke. Like, oh, there's my ride.

And like each day it got funnier and funnier. You guys are a lot of life. Molly, you're my, you're, you're my kind of person. Yeah. You, you were a tall, thin redhead that loves to make the same joke over and over and over again until it becomes funny only to you. God bless you, Molly.

You're my new hero. Yeah. My day 15, it was hysterical. Yes. I understand that as other people get more irritated. Yeah. It becomes funnier to you. Right.

Yeah. Yes. Yeah. I don't understand that. We get that. Oh, really? No. Yeah.

I don't know why I'm not. But Corley, let me explain it to you. Yeah. So a tall redheaded person just keeps hitting the same joke over and over again. Well, see. Molly is rubbing me the wrong way now. I don't know what it is.

Yeah. I can't quite put my finger on it, but I don't. I don't. She's just driving me a little crazy now. Molly, would you describe yourself as kind of a cool person? Oh. Yeah. I'm not a Polarius.

Sure. Of course you are. Wow. It's just, I, it's like looking in a mirror when I look at Molly. No, that is not actually. Molly's crying now. It's like Molly's looking in a fun house mirror. Molly is looking in a shattered mirror.

It's covered in ham gravy. Yeah. Well, you see, you do seem like you have a great sense of humor. Yeah. I tried to. I think I have to. And also whenever I'm on set, like at work,

I often feel inclined to entertain everyone that's around me and they'll just be like, stop talking. Oh, wow. Stop talking. So they just want you to model the clothes and be quiet and you're making jokes. You're just doing bits. Yeah.

You're doing bits. I do not like you, Molly. I don't know what this reaction is that I'm having towards you. I can't control it. I didn't think that I was this much like Conan until. You really are. But just tell me this, this is going to save you. I'm physically awkward.

I'm guessing you're very graceful. Not at all. What? Oh no. What do you mean? Are you? Well, I just, I've like walked through screen doors. Oh no.

I'm clumsy, you know. Do you fall down a lot? Yeah. Like I don't try to. No, I didn't mean on purpose. But you do fall down. Molly, I have, I have, this is like some weird, there's like a, there's like a black hole in time space where I'm looking at the

younger female version of me who's, but super attractive. I think what we're looking at here is how old are you, Molly? What year were you born? 25, I was born in 97. 97. What were you doing in 97? Let's see. Well, what do four year olds do?

Okay. All right. Nobody believed me. What I said, 97? Yeah. 97. How old were you? I was doing the late night show and.

34. 34 years old. Freelisa. Yeah. Heyday. There's no reason to bring up my wife right now. I'm trying to have a nice conversation with Molly. And suddenly you're bringing up this wife.

Nice job, Sona. I've met the best match that I've ever met in my entire life. And you start shouting about my wife. Molly, Molly, I'm sorry I blacked out. I'm old enough to be your father. I know I'm likely are. Every time, every time. What about my eyes?

What about my eyes? Okay, sure. We've been married 20 years. We have two grown children. I don't see how that's pertinent in this situation. You have three grown children. Oh, Molly, Molly, you guys need to do a DNA test. I think we do.

Oh my gosh. Yeah, exactly. Are you Irish? I'm Irish Scottish, yeah. But that's what my parents are. Right. It's good to be a blend. I'm 100% Irish and that's not good.

That's too much of the same madness coursing through the bloodstream. I think a mix is good and I think Irish Scottish is a great mix. My wife, we'll discuss now that she's been introduced in the conversation. It's like Welsh, Irish, English, and she's the sanest person I've ever met. And of course, I'm just a whole 100% dose of inbred insanity. Yeah. That's not a good thing. So Molly, my hat's off to you.

Yeah. Molly, all of your qualities are just perfection, I think, you know. Oh, because they're... Redheaded, sense of humor. Could easily make a living modeling, but in my case, choose not to. Oh, so it's an abstention, not... I just decided to go a different way. I see.

Okay. As he burps. As he burps. Does that also mean that I could be, you know, a very successful podcast? You know what, actually, I... Yeah. Let's put it this way, Molly, and I'm being 100% honest with you. You could do my job a lot more easily than I could do your job.

I think that's fair to say. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You could... You're a funny, cool person. You could have a podcast and people would like it. If I said, okay, I'm ready to wear clothes for Eddie Bauer, I think they'd hit me with sticks.

So... This is going to go straight to my head, though. It should. It should. You deserve it. So do you have a question for me? Is there anything I can answer for you? Are you my daddy?

Trust me. Put your mom on the line. I got to talk to your mom. My question is, can we do a DNA test? Yeah. Sure. Yeah. I'll do it.

I will happily do a DNA test. Be honest, Molly, would you be happy or buffed? Well, first of all, this is a much creepier question than that, which is she has a father. I don't know. He's going to figure into all this. Some hard truths. Yeah. Some hard truths.

I think this would come as bad news for you, I have to say. Yeah. Because... I think Sona would be really mad. I would be. Wait, why? I don't know. I don't know.

I mean, Nev and Beckett, luckily, you're not very much like you. Stop bringing my personal... I'm sorry. No, my children, yes. I'm saying Molly is very much like you. My children are far superior to me, and yeah. Yeah. But I think, yeah.

No, I don't think you seem... She seems just too... Yeah, there's an elegance for her. You seem too undamaged to be my direct descendant. But wait a minute, my kids are normal. They are. That doesn't make sense. Maybe you have a recessive elegant gene or something like that.

Yes. Yes. Recessive elegance. What an backhanded compliment. Conan, you have a recessive elegance. You mean it's realized in my lifetime? No, it's recessive. That's the title of this episode.

You're a great, great, great, great, great granddaughter. We'll get it, but not you. Molly's very cool. Yeah. Yeah. So you say Collingwood, Ontario. Yes. All right.

Well, we got to come by. We got to come by Collingwood. We got to go to that dive bar. Play some Buckhunter. Yeah. Is the food good? What's the food like? They have something called onion ring poutine.

Oh, yeah. Of course. Onion ring poutine is quite famous. A lot of cheese, right? Cheese curds. Yeah. I love poutine. Yeah.

So I mean, yeah, there's good food. There's cheap beer. Well, cheap beer is always the best tasting. Yeah. So between that and the cheese curds. Free beer. Free beer is always the best. But no.

And how do you, just any other questions for anybody from Molly? Gosh. Matt, is your cat still being a menace? No. Luckily the cat, we got rid of the fleas and now she's kind of, she and Glenn have kind of like have a cold war. So they've chilled out a little bit. So things are a bit better now.

That's good. She's still pooping everywhere. Oh. And Sona, congratulations on your book. Thank you. It's a New York Times bestseller. Thank you so much. And Sona, would you like to mention my wife again?

Yeah. So Conan's wife, Liza, who I love and everybody loves. And you know, I often say is the best part about you. Yeah. Anyway. So she's probably at home waiting for you after this. Well, Molly, it was very cool talking to you seriously. And you got to meet Liza one day.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Conan, if you were maybe 50 or 60 or 70 years younger, I like her again. I like Molly again. I'm back on board on the Molly. You're so, it's such a small difference. Yeah.

It's only a 70 year difference between us. That's ages of Molly. No, if excuse me, I have to be carried to the toilet. Hey, Molly, seriously, it was so cool talking to you and continued success. Very cool. Thank you so much for having me. Oh yeah. No problem.

Bye-bye. Thank you, Molly. Bye-bye. To Conan O'Brien needs a friend on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or wherever fine podcasts are downloaded.