Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend - Summer S’mores with Conan and the Chill Chums Season 5 Episode 5

Episode Date: August 21, 2025

Conan and the Chums compete in a high-stakes game of cornhole. Heads up: This is a special sponsored episode — which means it’s not part of our regular, ad-free lineup. We’ve partnered with our sponsor to bring you this content.  While it’s a bit different from our usual episodes, we think you’ll still enjoy it.  Thanks for supporting the sponsors who help keep the mics on! Get access to all the podcasts you love, music channels and radio shows with the SiriusXM App! Get 3 months free using this show link: https://siriusxm.com/conan.

This episode of Conor Bryant Needs a Friend is sponsored by Hershey's. Guys, I'm going to ask you a question. What better way is there to make summer memories than having s'mores with Hershey's milk chocolate? There's nothing. Toasted marshmallows, melted Hershey's chocolate, crunchy gram crackers. The classic taste brings family and friends together for ooey, gooey, good times. And I'm saying that with a straight face. Yeah.

And college diploma, ooey, gooey, good times. Make s'm more memories. see what I did this summer with Hershey's milk chocolate this episode of Connor Bryant needs a friend is sponsored by LL Bean just 15 minutes of outdoor time

can make you feel happier and more energized that's a fact Ask any doctor, ask any noise Ask the lady with the alligator poise Get out there and get your butt in LLBin LLBin makes getting outside more comfortable and more fun with expert quality clothing and gear

towels cooler totes and camping chas, you'll be get up for your best day outside ever for the best outdoor products and to save 10% on your order. Visit LLBeen.com slash Conan outside together since 1912. Summer Smoors with Conan and the Chill Chums,

a six-part series with Conan O'Brien, Sonam of Sessian, and Matt Gourley. Let's get started. Hey, Conan O'Brien here, welcoming you to episode 5 of Summer Smoors, 20, 25. I'm joined by my fellow broadcaster extraordinaire. I've trained her whole life for this.

Basically screwed around and just landed her butt and butter. This is Sonam of Sessian. Sona, this is exciting today, and we're going to play a game, and I know you're very competitive when you play games. I am, and I know you're very competitive when you play games, too. I'm a man who has seasoned with time. Okay. I'm very chill and accepting of any result.

No. Let's go now to our commentator. here we have two of course Matt Gourley Matt how are you I'm fine thanks Conan how are you I'm good and thank you for that very stiff I'm in commentator mode I've got I've got business to do business to conduct and the business of America is the business we are going to play Cornhole that's right and I'm going to go up against the dreaded Sonom of Sessian who's terrific at Cornhole well and and we're also joined by my personal position who's here in

case, because I'm doing a physical activity. That's right. And Dr. Arroyo, you suggested that you should be here to monitor my physical movements. Exactly, exactly. From the safe distance. You're going to be throwing things that weigh a little bit and I just want to make sure

that you do it safely. Okay, but we're talking about beanbags, Dr. Arroyo. A child, literally maybe a newborn, could hold these bean bags. I have no, I'm not worried about a newborn. Okay, all right. Now, Dr. Arroyo, you've I've been with me for, I think, 11 years now.

That's correct. Since we met, I think, at a parking lot of a Taco Bell. That's correct. That's correct. You looked like you needed some help, and I didn't. I was fine. I was walking to my car, and you said, I need cash. Help me.

I looked like I needed cash. Yeah. And anyway, you then became my physician. That's correct. I have not looked into your credentials, and I've been told by you, that's not a good idea. It's not necessary. And I'm here to watch the cornhole game, and I'm just as capable of doing this as I am of practicing medicine. Very good. All right. Well, shall we begin? What do you think, Matt? You're in charge here.

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the 2025 Summer Smoors Cornhole Invitational. I'm Matt Goreley. This is Dr. Jose Arroyo, your color commentators for this afternoon of sport and frivolity, our contestants today, Conan O'Brien, Sonam Obsessian. We've been talking about this game here in the office for well over a year. And it's been rumored about that we would actually have a competition between the two. We didn't do it last year, but we're doing it this year. And we have some surprise cornhole boards here. And I think it's time to reveal what we're looking at and the playing field. Blay? Oh, goodness. Oh, wow. Look at that. Oh, wow. For the listener at home, these boards are the perfect depiction of Conan with a giant wide open mouth to throw the bean bags in? And that is to scale, by the way.

That is the circumference of my open mouth and its relationship to my head. Gorgeous. And then the same for Sona. There's a representation of Sona with an open mouth. Dr. Arroyo, did these seem anatomically correct? They do, actually. I've seen Conan yell and get his mouth that big. So yes.

All right. So are you guys familiar with the rules of cornhole? Then you're just trying to get it in the hole? That's pretty much it, yeah. Where can we throw from? I know you can't go too far. You can go anywhere behind the front of the board. Got it, got it. And so we'll begin with you, Conan.

You're tossing red into Sona. Okay. And whenever you're ready, you get one point for landing on the board, three points for getting in the mouth, and zero points for any that fall off. Okay, so I should put these up here so they're ready, right? We can talk shit, right? You should.

And you alternate shots. What's that? You're supposed to alternate shots. Oh, yes. Alternate shots. Okay. Careful if your toe does go in front of the board. I understood.

Yeah. Come on, you little bitch. Okay, and really This is good We need to talk trash This will up the game So let me have it, Sona And really give me your best

You know, Glendale Slash Alta Dina Harsh vibes Yeah, you fucking can't throw You little bitch You're, yeah Who, what a wasted height Like who's this tall

And can't even Fucking sport You fucking loser Okay Let's dial it back a little bit That was atrocious And I'm going to go straight from here Probably to therapy

And just cry All right, it's your turn, little bitch Okay, here we go That's... I missed completely. That was terrible. Zero goose egg, that one flew over Like an F-15 Tomcat.

Sona with a point on the board. She didn't come here to play. Okay, I was just goofing around on the first one. Now we get to business. Watch your toe. What if I knock her one off? You can do that.

Yeah. Oh, that's slippery. Zero points. We didn't get any warm-up. Complaints already. Oh, my God. You can't fucking touch me. Don't swear.

Next time that happens, you lose a point. Two points, three points. Four points total for someone. This is embarrassing for you. What do you say? This is going to this game interesting. All right. Never mind.

Okay. I don't think it could be. I was told, I'm goofing around a little bit. I was told to make this interesting. I was. Oh, were you? Yes, I was. By Adam Sack.

our podcast producer. Oh, my God. So you've been seeing a little bit of what we call the old Baltimore flim flam. And it's time now to show you what can really happen.

One point. Well, okay. That was a lot of talk. No, no, we're building up. We're building up. That was a lot of talk. All right, Sona's up. She's got two more bags left.

Five points, Sona. One point, Conan. I can't get better at this. Conan's last bag. Watch this. Whoa, one point. Okay. Five to two so far.

Sona's got the last play. We'll subtract the lower score from the higher and get this round's tally. Oh! All right, it's 62, which gives Sona four points. Okay. For this round, we're doing three rounds. Yeah, I'm not worried about this at all

because I was told, make a little space up front. This is the first game. Make it interesting. That's going to get the clicks, the clacks, and the socials. So we should see you really sail from behind. Yeah, you're going to see it. All right, great. I'm actually promised you that.

All right, you guys get to move over to the other side for fair win. Am I still pitching red? Yes. Who went first last time? Conan did. Okay, so Sonia, you go first this time. Maybe if we did a competition where we built wooden airplanes, you'd win.

Dork. I'd build an excellent wooden airplane. Dr. Royale, mental health. Does it play a part in this game? It plays a huge part in this game. And Sona so far has shown incredible confidence and stamina. Yeah. Let's just see if she can bring it home.

I don't. She's on the board She's another point And now's the part What Conan shows you He was just missing The important thing is not to talk While they're about to throw

Because that could throw their confidence And their game off So you wait So I shouldn't Yes exactly Oh three points He's backing up his sack All right

So the saccharoliac Jack Oh two Sona Three Conan Conan's on his second throw knocks himself off. That was called a Donny Dud. Back when I'm from Boston. 3-2. Current score.

Off the board. Sona's last bag. Alleyoop. It's on the board. Tied up through to three. Conan's got one more. Get there. It's one.

It's four to three. That's one point for Conan. Four for the last round. Right now it's Sona three points ahead. Yeah. So, to three points ahead. Four to one. What are you doing?

I'm scoring cornhole. Yeah, but it sounds like mush. It's something like an auctioneer who just shot himself in the head and then the start of the auction. I'm winning. I'm winning. It has four and you have one. The point, trust me, watch what happens.

This is called the old alley oopsie, oopsie dopsy. No one calls it that. If they did. This is the last round, correct? It's first to seven. Okay. All right. It's first to seven?

First two seven. How long are we here? It's four to one right now. So Soto one right now. She's over. Yeah, yeah. Watch this. You ready?

and bongo one point close to the mouth that's what we call a chinner and now it's a blue bag for the old Labadu two on the board one on the board for Sona

No no she just pushed one of Conan's in okay Oh threw it completely over Sonas head but a lot of things go over her head She doesn't read here we go Oh someone's getting hurtful because he's losing

All right All right five for Conan three for Sona that's a net of two for Conan and a net of one because Sona just put one on the board so we are now at 4 to 2 So Conan's inching his way up He's winching his way up

What did I say I was going to do? Let me tell you something Oh my God Cornhole's a game It's in the mind more than the arm Jesus I have created an expectation Which will soon turn into a sex expectation

I think we're ready to go I don't think I've ever seen you throw anything feeling that at all You've seen me throw a fit. Yes. You've seen me throw a tantrum. Uh-huh. You've seen me throw out my back.

Yes. You've seen me throw at Jose's pitches. Yeah. That's true. So I'm... I think you go first on this one. Oh. All right.

Sonas up here. 4 to 2. No. Over the board. She doesn't score on that. Conan with a nice little ginger touch. One on the board. One for Sona.

Look at that. Look at it. That's like I'm sticking out my tongue. at all of you yes we got to get a shot of that get a that let a shot of that but that's not a three-pointer that's a one-pointer because it hasn't gone through the whole but it will yes you probably will if old man gravity knows what he's doing god like Caddyshack just wait oh sona puts you in for Conan getting your bags in for you currently sona two Conan four for this round one more

point for Conan sona with the last throw that's one more for sona and Conan's final throw for the round That sack in the mouth. Yes. Say that again, Dr. Royale? Let's put that sack in the mouth, Conan. You know, it's funny. First time I met you, you said that.

Oh, boy. There's a true story. Parking lot, Taco Bell. Here it goes. Turned out it was benign, remember? Your sack was benign? I agree. You have a benign sack?

Yeah, clearly. My wife's been saying that for years. Well, Hershey's finally decided to sponsor Summer Spores. You know, this has been the long con. We invented Summer Smoors to lure Hershey's. This is all I've ever wanted. This is like the movie The Sting. It's this really long con.

It's taking years to play out. We don't disagree on Smoors. The whole thing was staged just to get some attention. And now, old man Hershey has found himself in our snare. Yeah. Well, anyway, they decided to sponsor Summer Smoors, but they left me out. Matt and Sona got all this amazing merge swag. I got nothing because I'm anti-examination.

high smore. Well, now I understand why my past comments on smore is divided a nation, a nation, which is rarely divided. But Hershey's, I want you to know, my beef is not with you. I love chocolate. I love your new Hershey caramel bar, I believe, that a smore could be just chocolate and graham cracker, no marshmallow needed. I had the new Hershey's caramel. It was great. It was terrific. Sona, what do you think? How is the smore with caramel? Tell me what you think. It's so good. I mean, honestly, if anybody tries to give me a smore without Hershey chocolate, I just smack it out of their hand. Yes.

And the caramel just up the game big time. I saw your face laid up. That was my, I feel like tasting that was my purpose in life. Try Hershey's Milk, Chocolate with Caramel today. Smoor, more. The best moments happen outside, wandering along and, hey, look, that mama birds making a nest. Yeah. That's something you can't see when you're inside looking at your data screen on one of your

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Yeah. For the best outdoor products, and to save 10% on your order, visit lLbean.com slash Conan outside together since 1912. Well, this is the last bag, unless I remarry. Here we go. There it is. Conan's up 5'4. What the fuck? No.

Are you serious? Yeah, what are we talking about? Well, you were goofing around. This is exactly what I said was going to happen. Conan's two points away from winning. Okay. Sony, you have to beat him with that. And I start.

I know. I start, remember? I start. Oh, I got to get mine because it went in. Here we go. It's an extra. Sonya, you have to beat him. One point, Conan. All right.

This is it. I'm done. I'm done. One point, Sona. Lofty throw from Conan. It's good for another point. Sonas right on his heels with another point. 2-2 here on this round.

Three points for Conan. Oh, man. No! Sona knocks one of hers off the board with a one point round. Oh, yeah. Conan's off. Is it? Oh, she's got one more bag.

You got one more bag. You gotta make a three-pointer here to keep, stay alive. Shut up, Edwardo! Here we go. Just shut the fuck up. This is where it breaks down. Are you playing? Are you playing?

What if she knocks off one of his bags? I got next after the recording. Oh my God. Yeah? You could knock off one of his bags. Or you could just punch him in the sack. Then they're done that. There she is. I'm sorry, no.

For all his talk, Conan comes through. And the Empire has won. God, you hate to see it. And I'm an unbiased observer. Man, Sona. That's voluntary, isn't it, Conan? Is that? All right.

Okay. God, I started off so strong. Touch Roy, if you don't mind. Give me a quick. it's really good I think you're good for another two years could I

two years and could you check the heart as well please absolutely yeah I'm just gonna compare it yeah okay yeah

they're both good you get these at any costume shop this is correct this is correct but this one cost me a lot of money okay

thank you very much Dr. Arroyo you got a problem yeah I do have a problem bitch yeah sticks and stones may something something but names will well that was exciting for you yeah for you because there was this perception which I created that things were going to be tough and then I was really you know hurting then I don't know where I took you like four rounds

to make enough points so it's I just crumbled that's all it was I just I would like Eduardo to weigh in. Eduardo's a man of sport. He's a sportsman. I think luck goes a long way. Yay! That was luck. It was luck because I started to

really suck after that first round. You know what? I'm down for a rematch anytime. Well, I'll never touch that game again because I've just proven that I'm the best in the world at it. Walk away from success, I always say. This is a rough way to end the season

of summer summers. I know. Sona, how are you feeling? I feel like shit. I'm really upset. lost. I hate losing things in general, but losing to Conan is probably my biggest nightmare. I hate it so much. I can't think of anything. I hate more than losing to Conan. I'm really upset. I'm pissed. I'm mad at myself. I'm mad at my family. I'm mad at everyone who works on

this stupid fucking podcast. I hate everybody who thought of this idea so that it could open up this world in which Conan beats me at something. Oh, you have a sympathy vote. And that I think you lose. I just, I'm, I don't think you realize losing to Conan is the worst person you could lose to. Because he's a gloater. You're a gloater. No, I don't gloat. All I do is savor the victory out loud.

I don't know if that's what gloating is. An over-extended period of time and with great bravado. If that's gloating, then I suppose I'm a gloater. I don't think it is. Conan, what are you planning to do with this victory? Well, I've heard there's a cornhole circuit. Oh, my God. Now, several years ago, I won on something.

that I was told was the cornhole circuit, it turned out to be a very different thing. Is that how you got so good at Cornell? It had nothing to do with this. It was a misnomer. They call it the cornhole circuit, but I assure you it is not this game. Okay.

And I met some lovely people. But I was filled with shame afterwards. I felt degraded and used. So that's not going to happen again. I prefer this cornhole. but it turns out I'm good at both. So I think I want to get out there, and I think I'm a good spokesperson for this game and for the other cornhole.

Wait, have you ever played for reels? No. Okay. And you've probably played a lot, and that's interesting. Have you played before? I've played a few times. Yeah, I've played. And where do you play at sort of backyard events?

Yeah, like picnics and barbecues. Who's at this picnic? Tell me a little bit about the picnic. Little friends, family, cool people, like cool people who know how to... You just said you hate your family. family. Well, I'm angry that I lost. So I'm just talking about how angry I am. I'm getting my anger out. I hate that I lost to you. So I'm blaming everyone but myself. Let it go. You have a beautiful family. Oh, shut the fuck up. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry I called you a bitch multiple times. You're not wrong. You're not wrong. Gourley, what was it like for you to watch

me come from behind after predicting it I called it like Namath you know with the jets I called it no one I was the underdog people like to call me king of the dorks and etc etc and then I come out with one of the greatest displays of physical prowess

and mental acumen that people have ever seen honestly it made me hate my family too it made me hate Sonas family I hate Sonas family now well this was I think we learned something. No, we didn't. Just that life is a series

of miserable disappointments. Yes. And there's no justice. Yes. Yeah, that's what we, that was the goal, that was the title of the episode. Okay. That's what we meant to achieve. I loved it. I just loved being outside. This was our last episode outside. Remember how we started this series and he was so bleak and

complaining about circuits and he wins one game of cornhole? I know. Suddenly life is all sunshine and roses. I know. I hate that smug face. Oh, I hate your smug face. Let's just say I'm getting some tonight. Oh, God. Cornhole. No. Listen, let's just leave that up to the imagination.

No, let's not. Okay. Let's not do that. What's happening with this cornhole set after a dog? Yeah, what are we going to do with these? These two are amazing. Who made these? He's terrific.

Ryan did this? It's great. It's great. It's really well done. Please give him our thanks. Let's give him a full shout-out. What's his last name? Ryan Godo.

Art director, Ryan Godo. Let's hear it for Ryan Godo, please. And while we're at it, everybody who worked on this series. We still have one more episode in studio, but out here, everybody's at play. So thank you to all of you. I'm sorry, you've gone too far. Okay. I think I made this happen. I got here early. I set up the cameras and I scheduled everything. No, whose idea was Cornwall? I want to know. I want to know. Was it your idea? It was me. It was me, baby. So, Eduardo, you wanted to set me up to look the fool.

No, I knew you would come through. What? Nobody ever bets on Conan when there's an athletic anything. Really? I said I'd have the Tonight Show for 10 years. Oh, boy. He put a lot of money in it, and no one in his family's ever going to college now. Hey, I want to say, in all sincerity, to echo and continue what Matt so nobly began, we sail in at the last minute, like a bunch of goons, three goons in a pod, and everyone here has worked so hard to make this really fun. This was a fun day.

Yeah, it was. It started out with me moaning about all the conduits that are visiting. in the back of the Larchmont Studios and ended with triumph of evil over good. Over good. Yeah, yeah, yeah. If you believe that you were like, no, no, no, wait a minute. I don't know that. Yes, yes, yes.

But, yeah, I want to thank everybody here who worked so hard. And I also want to thank Dr. Arroyo. Yes. Dr. Arroyo step in here, please. And you are a man with a very shadowy background, a man who has been derided by the Medical Association of America and worldwide for being a poser, a fraud, a huckster.

But you came here today. But they also say bad things. You came here today with, I'm assuming your time is very valuable. It is. It is. I have to be somewhere right now. Actually, I am a live cornhole target. I don't know if I do that. I do that for $19 an hour.

So for people that don't have a set or a cornhole table. If they have an inclined plane, I will sit there with my mouth open. And so you do children's parties? I do children's parties, exactly. And I'm curious, Dr. Royo has choking ever been an issue? Does the beanbag ever get in there? Oh, all the time. Who is your counterpart that is the other board?

I don't know because I'm looking at the sun. Yeah. So I can't really see. And you have to keep your eyes open. They want an eye, cornholer. Exactly. And so I have protection. So you're headed now to Tarzana. Correct.

You will lay down, stare at the sun at some event. Is it a bar mitzvah, a bat mitzvah? Is it a, is it, I mean, tell me what kind of event this is. Is this someone wedding? It's actually somebody's 30th wedding anniversary. Okay. They wanted to toss beanbags at me, and I'll be lying down. You know what?

That's as good a use of a doctor's time as I think I've ever heard. And I want to thank you, Dr. Royal. And God bless you and the work that you're trying to do, but failing. Thank you. Thank you. All right. Okay. Oh, what's this? He does everything with such a plumb.

What a show business professional. I don't know what. I'm just going to practice. Practice. You practice. Inclined plane. I so want to throw a beanbag in there. I know.

I know, but I'd break his nose. How about a marshmallow? Well, we could try. Yeah. You know, it's worth a shot. If you can make him choke, it's like four points. this is awful this is the worst thing this is something i think caligula did this jose why are you why are you doing this jose you have oh oh yeah okay

next year i'll take you in cornhole yeah uh congratulations uh dr oroyo wonderful fellow absolutely no self-esteem we want to again we will see you But next week for the wrap-up, the emotional wrap-up to this 2025 installment of chill chums. And, of course, the aforementioned, what do we call this again, Summer Smoors? I just hate how happy you are. You can tell, right? Yeah, oh, yeah. You have a, you're very, like, chipper in the way you're talking.

Oh, you're the worst guy in the world. Oh, my God. Honestly. Oh, you're awful. Bad winner, bad winner. All right, well, we'll see you next week. Peace out. That was brutal.

Summer Smoors with Conan O'Brien, Sonam of Sessian, and Matt Goorley. Produced by me, Matt Goorley. Executive produced by Adam Sacks, Jeff Ross, and Nick Leow. Theme song by The White Stripes. Incidental music by Jimmy Vivino. Take it away, Jimmy. Our supervising producer is Aaron Blair, and our associate talent producer is Jennifer Samples.

Engineering and mixing by Eduardo Perez and Brendan Burns. Additional production support by Mars Melnik. Talent booking by Paula Davis, Gina Batista, and Brick Con. You can rate and review this show on Apple Podcasts, and you might find your review read on a future episode. Got a question for Conan? Call the Team Coco hotline at 669-587-2847 and leave a message. It too could be featured on a future episode.

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