Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend - The Valentine’s Day Matchmaker Special

Episode Date: February 15, 2024

Conan helps newly single Team Coco social media producer Sam punch up her dating app profiles on a Valentine’s Day special. Wanna get a chance to talk to Conan? Submit here: TeamCoco.com/CallConan

Hello and welcome to a special episode. Conan O'Brien needs a friend. This is a little different. Today is the day after Valentine's Day. Special day. Did you have a nice Valentine's Day, Sona? I did. Did your husband get you anything nice?

Yeah. Okay. He got me a... You're acting very weird. Very weird. Almost as if we taped this before Valentine's Day. Yeah. And you are completely unable to pretend.

Doesn't he usually get you flowers or something? He got me flowers? Uh-huh. And we- And your favorite chocolate. Yeah, yeah. That's such good chocolate. Yeah.

And then he got me, we ate at a restaurant. And- Wow, compelling story. No one tells it like you. What, um, Wow. Compelling story. No one tells it like you. What about you, Matt? Well, you have a nice Valentine's Day that even though we're taping ahead of time, but was it a good Valentine's Day? Yeah, we ate at the top of the Empire State Building and then watched taken on a blimp.

Nice. Okay. Oh, we're making shit up then. No. No. Okay. Well, I went to Paris and I just got back this morning. Oh, really?

Yeah, we did you meet your French character and what did he sound like? I can't believe you didn't make it they don't do as an improviser They don't do Valentine's Day in in Paris. Have you ever thought of auditioning for sign-out live? Just doing your French character and and just taping a big fake mustache under your nose? Yeah, I should. I'll arrange it. Big fake mustache? What does a mustache do?

It's just your French guy. My French guy doesn't have a mustache. He's clean shaven. Oh, then he's not French. Okay. Listen, it is the day after Valentine's Day, a very special day for many where they are either sad about their lonely Valentine's Day or quite delighted with the romance of that very special time. Or happy with their non-relationship Valentine's Day.

That's the third one I was getting to. I didn't mean to make it sound like there were only two. Oh no, no, that was just me getting to the big and I think the best one, which is being very happy being just on your own for the time being or forever, whichever you prefer. And either one's okay. We have limited time.

Anyway, I should point out this is a 15 hour segment. We have a special guest joining us today, someone who works on the show, the podcast here at the podcast company. Podcast, podcast empire really if you will. Oh awkward. More of a conglomerate. That's like saying standard oil is just an oil company.

Well no, it really is an octopus if you will. What? It takes, Teddy Roosevelt has to break it up. But that's not the point. The point is Sam is here. Hi, Sam, how are you? Hi, I'm good. Were you waiting for me to get around to the point

of this whole podcast? Yeah, I've been here a while. Yeah, let's see. Lily, how long did you get older as you've been sitting here? Sam, you're quite young and you've been working here at Conan O'Brien. Needs a friend for how long? Like two and a half years, I think. Yeah.

You having a good time? Sure. Okay. She seemed pretty chill. I'm not gonna say no. But she meant no. Like two and a half years. Yeah, you having a good time? Sure. Okay No, but she meant no Very much behaving like a prisoner of war making a tape, but anyway Sam what is your job title here? I understand you recently got a promotion. I did I am now the social media producer Oh, very nice good. Well, you do a terrific job. Thank you. I like working with you and with Ruthie very much. Thank you.

You guys are cool. And you seem to tolerate me. Your vibe very much is I will tolerate Conan. Yeah, I feel that. Yeah. Okay. Anyway, it's a pleasure working with you as well, Sam. Sam, we had you in here because rumor,

and you know how people talk in an office, rumors that you are freshly single. I am. And anything you wanna say about that is backstory? It was a short one. Well, like I said, you're young, this is what you're supposed to be doing. Just be meeting different people.

Hitting it and quitting it. Hell yeah. Oh yeah. Plowing and. Okay, take it easy. Chowin? Chowin? I don't know, I wasn't going anywhere.

That was awful. Plowin and chowin, that's fantastic. Sam, you went through this breakup, you are newly single. I don't know, I've been married for a long time. And so I don't know anything about the dating apps. Are you on the apps? No. No? Are you thinking of going on an app? Yeah dating apps. Are you on the apps? No.

No? Well. Are you thinking of going on an app? Yeah. Yeah. I feel ready. Are you averse to an app or you're ready to do it? No, no.

That is how I historically have dated. OK. Most people, most young people I meet today, use dating apps. And many of them quite successfully. Oh, yeah. My last two relationships were from the apps. Yeah. OK. Is there an app that you favor in particular? And this is not a commercial, so you can say whatever you want. And many of them quite successfully. Oh yeah, my last two relationships were from the apps, yeah.

Is there an app that you favor in particular? And this is not a commercial, so you can say whatever you want. We're not gonna be paid by anybody. You know, Bumble's a good one. I like that, Hinge is good, Tinder's bad. Stay away from Tinder. Tell me, what is it, I just wanna know as kind of a friend, an employer and kind of a pervy guy,

what's the problem with Tinder? It feels very like hit it and quit it, kind of a pervy guy. What's the problem? What's the problem with Tinder? It feels very like hit it and quit it, kind of. Plow it and chow it. Plow it and chow it. Yeah. Right, right. It's just a little scary. Shag it and bag it.

Okay, throw it out the door. Little bag it. Bag it, yeah. Like bag it used to mean like let's get out of here. You know, you shag and then you bag, you know? No, it sounds like you shag it and then you're murdering it and then you put it in a bag. Well, that's, listen, listen, if that's your thing,

that's what happens. You gotta, if you're gonna murder someone, you gotta clean up after yourself. So, so, so you like bumble? Yeah. You taking notes here? Remember, if you murder, always clean up. Okay.

I wanna be that PSA. If you murder, I'll be the smoky the bear is to what? We hope you don't have to murder, but if you do. If you do, hey, keep it clean. Someone else is gonna rent that apartment. Hey, that crawl space might be needed by someone else. Okay, so Bumble, and I hear a lot of good things about hinge, hinge is a good one.

Hinge is great. How can we help you? I want to help you? I wanna help you. I know that you are indifferent to me, but I like you. I really liked that you work at the company and you're bringing your creativity and your social media smarts and benefiting us. So I wanna help you.

What do you think I could do to help? I think help me with my prompts and all that. Okay, let's do that. We can actually bring this profile up on the screens. We've kind of done a little bit. Do we have that kind of technology? We do. OK. Oh, look at that.

There you are. You look great, Sam. These are beautiful photos. Thank you. I think this is great. I love those photos. OK, so I'm looking at your Bumble Date profile. And those are really nice pictures.

Thank you. And I would just like to put in my own comment about Sam, which is incredibly cool. And you seem to give a very amazing sense of humor. And so I think that's the cone and seal of approval. But let's go through the prompts and tell me how I can help. I'm surprised you're not telling her to pick up,

put a picture up of you. I know. Well, if you want to get some clicks. What would be the best version of you in her photo? Not just a selfie, but how can we be creative where it's like maybe you're like deep in the background staring down the camera or something like that. So it's just an odd like.

He's a lurker. We could take that one now We could take one now. You know, it would be funny. What if Sam is pushing me in a wheelchair and like her hobby is taking care of Conan O'Brien, who's much more infirm than you think he is. I don't know. It's just raises a lot of question.

It would get a personal. You come across this very caring in this hobby. Is there one we could shoot right now? What about I'm bringing you a drink like I work for you. Yeah. Oh, that'd be great. Want to do that? Mm hmm. You're going to help us out here. I could be handing this mug.

Yeah, the mug. Yeah. Yeah. And then I'm going to be bringing you a drink. Like I'm your do I have the headphones on for this? Absolutely. OK. I don't know. And Blay, you do this away from my microphone, but I think my dulcet tone still. Here we go. I love your hands ready to accept. There we go. Okay. That is me humbly serving you, Sam. And I look, I'm obsequious. I'm hoping that I please the Almighty Sam. We should choose that as the main photo, I'm obsequious. I'm hoping that I please the almighty Sam.

We should choose that as the main photo, I think. Okay, so that's gonna go on as a photo. That's very good. And then what's next? You young people, and I'm including everyone in this room who's not me. Okay. What's next, guys?

All right, so interests, you wanna add some interests? Yeah. Sam, here's some interests that we've got. Here are the different categories of interests. We have self care, sports, creativity, going out, staying in, film, there's a lot of them. There's a lot of them. Can I quickly say something?

I worry that if there's too much stuff in the self care area, it's gonna send a signal that, you know, I'm neurotic. Do you know what I mean? Like I spend a lot of time taking care of myself and thinking about myself. That's why, I'm a complete novice. This is just me shooting from the hip.

Sure. What do you think? I do care about myself though. You do? But I would say let's just not go crazy on this and check every one. So maybe just sleeping well. No, you could do more.

There could be more than one. You can pick as many as you want. I go to therapy. Okay, so do I. Yeah. I mean, clearly if anyone's listening to the podcast, they haven't been in a while. Sleeping well in therapy.

I think those are fine ones. What if a guy's like, I really want a girl who can have a deep chat. Cause I feel like Sam's deep. Yeah. We could do that. No, no, no. I'm not gonna force it.

No, but deep chats, this is so preliminary that I would worry that deep chats implies that that's gonna be expected on the first date. Oh, okay. Do you know what I mean? I'm gonna hit it and quit it on there. No, wait, I'm seeing sex positivity though. Yeah. If I did this, I'd be sex negativity.

Very sex negative. Yeah. It's the whole thing just freaks me out. Mm-mm. What a freak show. Okay, sports. What are your sports? None.

All right. Already you'd be a hit for me. Yeah. Oh, this one you're gonna kill because you're very, I know you're creative. Thank you. I like art. Yes you do.

And crafts. Making videos, that's a big part of my job. What kind of videos? I know you make them for us, but do you do it on your free time? Yeah, for myself, yeah. All right, but is it ever impinge on what I'm paying you for?

Oh my God. Maybe, maybe I post from here sometimes. Okay, well, that's something we have to discuss. So that's an eight term meaning. Photography. Going out. Okay. Let's go to going out.

Yeah. Well, everyone goes out, right? I don't go out very often. Do you go to bars? Not really. Do you go cafe hopping? What? Does that mean, what if you go to one cafe

and just hop up and down? That's the kind of cafe hopping I do. A boy, a boy, a boy. Monsieur, please, if you could move on. Where's your fake mustache? Is he a callback? Just don't know his French impression. Yes, it is. It's called a callback.

So no cafe hopping, no bars, clubs? No. I haven't been to a club in my life. Concerts, you like music? Yeah, you could put concerts. All right. That's fine. Put concerts down.

Oh, wait, guys, you can only- Wait, wait. We've reached our limit. You've chosen all five. Oh, no. What? You can only have five interests. Are you kidding me?

And are you able to enter your own? You have to choose theirs. I think you have to choose theirs, Vali. This is a scam. But where do you- Traits, pets, traveling. Oh, these are your most- Oh, wait a minute.

You're the most- You're the most- So we did this all wrong. I didn't realize you... Trates, pets, traveling. Oh, these are your most... Oh, wait a minute. You're the most... So we did this all wrong. I didn't realize you can only put in five. Yeah. How do you date if you can only say five things about yourself? Well, I think there's...

I can't believe it blank. I don't put anything in here. Oh, this is Joe, the engineer. I think we should have been talking to her all along. He sound like, you know, we're talking about. Joe's very cool. I trust her. Yeah, Joe is super cool.

What's the strategy, so, Joe, for putting in nothing. So I just do photos all from the same room. What? Why? What do you mean? It just, you know, just use the same room, like just different parts of the room, and then a bio, and that's it.

So like the zero effort adds an air of mystery. Wow. I think just people ask you more questions about why you're in the same room. I like what I'm hearing. Maybe we don't check air of mystery. I think just people ask you more questions about why you're in the same room. I like what I'm hearing. Maybe we don't check any of these. Yeah, take them off. Take them off.

I trust her. Joe, why didn't you say anything while we were completely screwing this up? You're so chill that you neglected to help us. But some people like to put their interest in there and then you just have to answer a lot of questions about like basketball. Okay.

Even if you're just a cafe hopping. Yeah. Cafe hopping, that's weird, right? Yeah, that's really weird. I don't know, I love it. I just want to use like- You love it. I love cafe hopping.

Same photo. It describes my life in my 20s was cafe hopping. Okay, we got to move along. We don't have much time for this. All right, so, Joe, do you think we should, we have profile prompts and then do you wanna add a prompt? Yeah, I would add a prompt. Okay, now this says pick a profile prompt.

It's the perfect opportunity to show a little more of your personality. I'm hoping you... But keep it simple. Guarantee that I'm non-negotiable. You pick one. Me? Yeah, pick one out. A non-negotiable. You pick one. Me? Yeah, pick one out.

A non-negotiable would be if you're not a Conan fan. No, that's fine. No. Actually, it would be weird if they were a big Conan fan. But don't you think- Wait, hold it. Why? Because then I would feel like

they're trying to date me to get to you. I think that's gonna happen already now that we've done this. No, I know. No, that was always my big thing, was I never was sure what guy's intentions were. Tac is always trying to talk to me and write me and hit me up for various Conan memorabilia. Sometimes he makes me put a Conan mask on when we go to bed.

Oh my God. I'm so kidding. I'm kidding. I asked, well, I said, where was I? Can we get that out? See, when I took this job, my wife left me. Liza, put on that Conan mask. No, no.

Listen, no, we won't mention me at all. I mean, I'm in the photo. What's your, my real life superpower is? It has to be clever. How about X-ray vision? It's like a real superpower. She's got one. My real life super, my favorite real life super this is, I can fly at the speed of light.

And if I circle the earth backwards, I can go make it go back in time. I always heal and have adamantium bones. Yeah. That's a funny one. Oh, that's giant endomanthium spikes come out of my knuckles. I am Wolverine. Just saying nothing. Endomanthium. Just saying no powers. No superpowers.

Okay, we're being told by Joe to knock it out. Take it out. Take it out. Wait, the goal here is celibacy forever, isn't it? Isn't the goal here to live and die alone? That's what I thought we were doing. The only hits you're gonna get are me, Conan and Sona. Yeah. That's what you wanna say? No, that's what I have on mine. Yeah, but Joe, come on.

I'm serious. How's it working for you? It literally worked, I have a boyfriend. Oh my God. You didn't tell me you had a boyfriend. Everyone's supposed working for you? It literally worked. I have a boyfriend. Oh Tell me you had a boyfriend everyone's supposed to report this shit to me That's creepy rule number nine in the code and code. Oh, well you're in a bathtub in an empty bathtub And it's just the description says don't hate me if I and your answer is just don't. Joe, can I see? I don't know.

I don't think that's going to work for me. That's very on-brand for Joe, though. Yes. But notice how all the photos are in the bathroom. When you said a room, you meant the bathroom. But Joe, you have a very specific thing going on, and I'm worried that it's not Sam's thing. Oh, my God.

Yeah, that's true. I'm not as cool as Joe. Well, no, you're cool in a different way. You're just cool in a different way. Oh my God. These look like American apparel ads. Yeah, they really do. You're wearing a...

A lot of people are like, why are these in the bathroom? And then you gotta be like, yeah, then you can talk about it. Cause I live in a bathroom. Right. You wanna date me? Yeah.

Did you ever mention that if you kill someone in the tub, the cleanup is very easy? Oh, yeah. All right, let's just move on. Okay, Sam, you gotta help us out here. What are you ever mention that if you kill someone in the tub, the cleanup is very easy? Oh, yeah. All right, let's just move on. Okay, Sam, you gotta help us out here. What are you seeing here that, what makes me feel grounded? I'm a real nerd about...

Yoga. I'm a yoga teacher. That's cool. I like that. That is good, but are you cool attracting yoga dudes? Is that a breed that... Yeah, I would like to go to yoga with my partner. Okay, okay. Yeah, I'll take anything. Okay, okay. I that a breed? I would like to go to yoga with my partner. Okay. Okay.

Yeah, I'll take anything. Okay. Okay. We'll learn about yoga. Oh, this is good. Yoga. You know what? I don't like the exclamation point. I know. I know, Blay. I know that you love exclamation points.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Why do you always put exclamation points? Every text from Blay is like, sorry, your dad died. Exclamation point. I will say, I emailed you about something and there was an exclamation point and you said, hey, I'm getting you some, I'm allowing this

exclamation point because it's your birthday. And then you sent me a follow up email like two hours later, here's your birthday present, it was just a bunch of exclamation points. I put a lot of thought into my put downs. Okay, I like that. I'm really worried about yoga. Yes, this is good.

Mm-hmm. So I'm gonna put, I'm just a real worried about yoga period. You tell me, this is your dating problem. I like the teacher part. Okay, thank you. I like your teaching part. Yes, that's cool.

Yoga. I'm a yoga teacher. Joe, what you got? You can put an emoji instead of a period. Oh no. Oh. Okay, well, I also don't know. That's not Sam style. Yeah. Okay. We gotta keep it Sam. Okay, so here Oh no. Okay, well, I also don't know. That's not Sam style. Yeah. Okay. We've got to keep it Sam.

Okay, here we go. Okay, so now the next section is my opening move. Start your, start your chats with an opening move. Okay. So I don't know, this says you're in control, set your move once and we'll take it from there. We'll add it to your profile and send it to all new chats. Is that what you want? and send it to all new chats? Is that what you want? So this is like an auto reply? Yeah. That's crazy. I think this is a nightmare. I think you people live in a hellscape.

Yeah. All right. Let's get those apocalyptic hellscape. Let's get to the meat of this, which is your bio. Oh, here we go. You want to write a fun and punchy bio. This is what people are going to see. They're going to see your photo and they're going to see your bio.

So this is important. Oh boy. Okay. Well, it's cool. You work in a very cool place. It's okay to mention that. Start with that. All right. Work at a very cool place. It's okay to mention that. Start with that. All right. Work at a really cool place.

Yeah. Should I just brag in the whole bio? No, I think it's, but Joe, I shouldn't mention, we shouldn't mention anything about her working with her. I wouldn't put stuff about work. Yeah, okay. So it's safe to say there's nothing about Conan in your bio. Yeah. Yeah.

Okay. You don't have your job on your profile? I have my job, yeah. Okay. Do you at all feel like you need to disclose that you work here? Yeah. Sort of like you knew I was working. It's a warning.

You knew. No, the next thing. You knew I had been in prison. Oh, the next thing is work. It's the work. So, okay. So what's your bio? What do you want them to know about you?

God, I don't know. I feel like I'm a very chill and like. You are the chillest person I've ever met. Really? Yeah. I feel like that's important because I can't have someone with like really intense energy. And I'm working. Why are you working with me then? It's hard.

When I, I mean, I come into a room and I'm, I come into a room and there's heat coming off of me and I'm babbling like a chimp on crack. And I always see you in the corner and you're always shaking your head. No grasshopper. No. So that's good.

You should say that she's. You could be like, don't be like Conan. Just yeah. Wait, don't mention Conan. But if you do mention Conan, it's don't be like Conan. That's great. Yeah. But like I work for Conan. I'm looking for's don't be like Conan. Yeah. That's great. So yeah, but like I work for Conan, I'm looking for someone who's not like Conan.

Yeah. Okay, we could do that. Yeah. And I'm looking for someone who's not like Conan. Then how about parentheses, keep in mind Conan is very kind, generous and sensitive. Oh God. But his energy sometimes is a little tightly coiled.

I think you gotta put something in there so people don't think I'm a monster. We can't have anyone saying I'm a monster. You're a very kind person. He's very kind and generous. And then can you put in brackets, he made me write that. Yes, thank you, that's what I was looking for.

That's not something a normal person says. So it's important for people to know you did this. Conan made me write that last part. Yeah, did this. Conan made me write that last part. Yeah, say that Conan made me write that last part. He's crazy. Please help me. I never wanted to do this. I'm in a relationship.

It's right. W R I T E. Would you say to me? Oh, that's embarrassing. Conan made me write that last part. I just think it's good if it just keeps going with Conan just making you do this. He's here with me now. Yeah, call the police.

He's here with me now. He may come on our first date. On our first date. Oh, sorry. Oh, wow. I'm not going to pressure him. I'm not going to pressure him. On our first date. Just wrote, come in our first date. Oh, wow. I'm not gonna press her. I'm not gonna press her. I'm not gonna press her.

I'm not gonna press her. I'm not gonna press her. I'm not gonna press her. I'm not gonna press her. I'm not gonna press her. I'm not gonna press her. I'm not gonna press her. I'm not gonna press her.

I'm not gonna press her. I'm not gonna press her. I'm not gonna press her. I'm not gonna press her. I'm not gonna press her. I'm not gonna press her. I'm not gonna press her. I'm not gonna press her.

I'm not gonna press her. I'm not gonna press her. I'm not gonna press her. I'm not gonna press her. I'm not gonna press her. I'm not gonna press her. He does. He's DTF. Okay, for me. Like in my stead. Okay, okay. Okay, how's this? How's this? Uh-huh. You're bio. I'm very chill.

I work for Conan and I'm looking for someone who's not like Conan. Parentheses, he's a very kind and generous person. Unparentheses, Aero pointing to that. Conan made me write that last part. He's here with me now. He may come on our first day. I think there needs to be a little bit more Conan.

No? He's very kind. Okay, work. See above. Add a job. Here we go, yeah. When we say just Conan, do you think people will know that's you? Oh, like she works for Conan Gray.

I don't think so. That would be great. It would be pretty cool. Oh yeah, that would be cool. That would be cool. He's chill. He's really cool. This is looking for a relationship,

something casual, don't know yet, marriage or skip. Who puts down marriage? I'll put marriage. Oh, Joe. I'm serious, I'm serious. Are you ready to get married? Yeah. Are you serious?

Maybe this will happen for you. I'm 31, I'm about to be 31. What's your height? Five feet. Five feet, I like it. Just five. Perfect. All right, do you want to answer? Five feet. Five feet, I like it. Just five. Perfect. All right, do you want to answer the rest of these questions?

Yeah, do it. All right, do you work out? Yeah. Well, actually, Yogan's truck. Oh, yeah, she is active. She's a Yogan's truck. Zodiac sign. Do you think this is important?

Oh, yeah. Yeah, he got it. Big time, yeah. I'm a Pisces. Yeah, I was going to guess Pisces. Oh, okay. Where are you? Yeah, you seem like a Pisces.

Thank you. That's a compliment. I have an undergraduate, yeah. All right. You agree, that's good. It's good. Do you drink? Do you drink? Rarely.

Okay. Boo. Do you smoke? Is that a cigarette? I know, yeah. A cannabis is its own can of cannabis. Oh, okay. So, no.

How do you use cannabis? Yes. Well, frequently. Frequently feels dramatic. They don't have like a yes. My God, ideal plans for children? Yeah, what do you want? You want kids?

Yeah. That's nice. You'd be a great mom. We don't need to say this. I mean, this is first date convo. Well, I don't, we're not first date. I mean, what about this? Did you get into this with people?

Yeah, I think it's better to just say that, especially if you don't want kids. Oh, I do. Yeah, it's good if people find, you don't want to be telling someone three years in that you never want children if they really want kids. Yeah, it's gotta come up. Okay, all right, so I think we're done.

I think we got it here. Let's, should we recap? There's the main photo. There I am serving you your, Oh no, it's caught off. Oh no, it's caught off! Oh no! I got a reset of-

That's perfect though, cause they gotta know, they gotta know that it's there. Oh that's true. Yeah, they could, right, they could see it. Cut off! I love it.

That's so funny. And then, yeah, and then let's see. Oh, and then just for work, it says see above. Oh my God. I work for a fraction of a man. I'm very chill. I work for Conan and I'm looking for someone who's not like Conan. He's a very kind of generous person. Conan, maybe right that party's here with me now. You may come on our first date. Okay. And then your basics,

five feet active. You're a Pisces, undergraduate degree, drink rarely, smoke never, you're a woman, you're socially cannabis. You didn't put the word about cannabis. Oh yeah, socially cannabis. And then you want marriage. And here's some other great photos. I'm a real nerd about yoga.

I'm a yoga teacher. Oh, and that's right before your yoga. That's great. All right, there we go. Maybe what we can do is if you have any hits, we can do a second follow-up for this, you know? I will say, I think it's good that it cuts your face off because it makes you wanna tap into it.

Like I just did. You know, you're like, oh, who is that? That looks like Conan. Yeah. It doesn't look enough like me. There it is. Yeah, there you go. Yeah, I could be.

I can re-center it so it's more in the thing. Okay, well. You cut out Sam. Conan's in the picture. Yeah. And then suddenly I'm filling out the questions. Six four. Mm-hmm.

200 pounds. I think you're gonna get some interesting responses. Yeah, we'll see. I will say seriously, and I'm gonna say it again, Sam's wonderful. And you have a very cool aura. Oh, thank God. As do you, Joe, by the way.

I have to say though, and Sona, we have, won't you say the women that work here are very cool aura. Oh, thank God. As do you, Joe, by the way. I have to say, and Sona, we have, won't you say the women that work here are very cool. Oh, yeah, yeah. I think, yeah. It just goes through the whole, you know, Tanisha and E.B. and Root. We've got a squad here that is very impressive. A lot of very strong, very, you know, opinionated women.

And everyone quite happy to give me shit. Yes. All the time. Yes, I think you do it on purpose. I think you are drawn to women who, opinionated and everyone quite happy to give me shit. Yes. All the time. Yes. Which makes me happy. I think you do it on purpose. I think you are drawn to women who, because I think-

Who love me. Who love me. Yeah. Well, I think we're gonna get to, and then you should come back and we'll, you know, we'll see what happens. We'll see what happens, but I'm excited. Thank you.

Because I know nothing about dating apps and I think this was the worst thing you could possibly do. So I'm curious to see what happens. Good luck to you. What do you mean, the dating app is the, oh, coming here for advice? No, no, no, getting, coming to, yeah, coming here for advice.

Oh, yeah, this is terrible. This is a terrible, like, this is just- You should have gone right to Joe. I know, I know. Because, and so you should probably talk privately to Joe. Yeah, I know. And you guys will straighten a lot of things out. Yeah, okay.

I'm scared. All right, Sam, best of luck to you. And I look forward to the recap. I look forward to meeting your future partner. I know, my husband. Uh-oh. Or ways. Or ways. It doesn't matter, man.

It's all good. Conan O'Brien needs a friend. With Conan O'Brien, Sonam of Sessian and Matt Gorely. Produced by me, Matt Gorely. Executive produced by Adam Sacks, Joanna Salotarov, and Jeff Ross at Team Coco, and Colin Anderson at Earwolf. Theme song by the White Stripes.

Incidental music by Jimmy Vivino. Take it away, Jimmy. Our supervising producer is Aaron Blair and our associate talent producer is Jennifer Samples. Engineering by Will Bekdon, talent booking by Paula Davis, Gina Batista, and Britt Kahn. You can rate and review this show on Apple Podcasts and you might find your review read on a future episode. Got a question for Conan?

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