Corporate Survivor with Mei Phing : Career Growth In The Corporate World - Ep182: If your mind is messy and chaotic… Do THIS!

Episode Date: September 4, 2023

✅ Get FREE GUIDE, newsletter, join career program 👉 http://www.meiphing.com ✅ Corporate Survivor™ is the ultimate career course for 9-to-5 working professionals, just like *you*, who want to enhance corporate world mindset, skillset and strategy so you can NAVIGATE + GROW your career with clarity, confidence & opportunities... 🚀 ⚡ 📌 ABOUT THIS PODCAST: Welcome to Corporate Survivor with Mei Phing — ex-Corporate Leader turned Career Coach & Founder of The Corporate Survivor™. On this podcast, Mei Phing shares her corporate world insights, experiences and wisdom so you can grow your 9-5 career with clarity, confidence and opportunities. ✅ WEBSITE ⮕ https://www.meiphing.com ✅ FREE GUIDE ⮕ https://www.thecorporatesurvivor.co/freeguide ✅ NEWSLETTER ⮕ https://www.thecorporatesurvivor.co/mondays ✅ CAREER COURSE ⮕ https://www.thecorporatesurvivor.co ⚡

Welcome to the Corporate Survivor Podcast, where we talk about how to grow your career confidence, build your skills and value, increase your salary, and the many lessons we learn in the corporate world. For more career support, click on over to www.mayping.com. This is Mayping, your corporate leader turned career coach. I hope you enjoy, like and subscribe. Biggest life-changing lesson that I've learned during my 2016 career break is the concept of minimalism. Hey, welcome back to the Corporate Survivor Podcast with me, Mei Ping, and this is the best place for you to learn everything about the corporate world. My personal definition of minimalism is basically clarity and simplicity. So let me explain how this has helped me. So throughout my career

journey, you know, if you are familiar with my career journey, I started my career in a very small company. I was a trained accountant. Then I moved into Ernst & Young, which is a huge MNC. And if you know anybody working in audit, you will know that we have no life and we are working all the time and we probably work more than 12 hours every single day. Then after that, I transitioned roles, I transitioned departments and industry and I joined Visa.

So every single time, you know, I made a career change, there was always transitions and I always found myself in roles where I was always building something. So it was either in a pioneer team or I was building like processes and systems. I've always been in very stressful roles and where I need a lot of critical thinking, I need a lot of like mental energy at work. So one of the struggles that I've had for a very long time and I say that probably

the first half of my career was around the fact that like how do I stay focused because when there's just so many things going on, it's really not easy to stay focused and overwhelmed is a feeling but if you're able to break it down into some key areas, then I think you are able to actually take action. So now I'll tell you something that I've been telling my coaching client and that's the fact that if your environment is messy, that means your mind is messy, right? Because our environment and how we end up behaving, it usually comes from within. It's like the inner chaos is going to transition into your external chaos. So if you feel that in your mind it's chaotic, I'm going to guarantee you that your office desk is in a mess, your home desk is in a mess,

your bedroom is in a mess, your house is in a mess. It's the same thing. That's because in your mind, it's like a war zone. So how can your environment be clean? So when I discovered minimalism, I thought, oh, that was really interesting because I've always been feeling like

it's just a lot of things going on and my environment is also really, really messy because that means that if I'm focused inward, I'm definitely not focusing outward, if you get what I'm trying to say. So, what I decided to do was I decided to start my little decluttering journey. So, what I did was, like, I started decluttering every single part of my life from physical possessions to digital footprint. So, what I did was, you know, I got rid of a lot of stuff. I re-evaluated my spending habits.

I really re-considered where my attention was. Because one of those things, particularly online, is about, you know, how we are always distracted with the next thing, next thing and next thing. But it's like we go broad, but we don't go in deep. So how can I simplify my life in a way that i can focus because i think for a lot of people we want to do everything all at the same time and then we wonder why we're not seeing any results and the truth is that if you're trying

to do everything at one time you're probably not going to achieve anything because nothing is getting your 100% attention. And, you know, let's be honest, right? As humans, we only have that much energy to focus on one thing at a time. So if you're trying to tell me that, you know, maybe I want to do all these 20 things and all 20 things are important, then that means that nothing is important. So what we really want to do is eliminating the noise around us, right? So now I want you to ask yourself, what is a distraction? What is a distraction? So let's talk about social media. I want you to think about the time that you pick up your phone and how long did you spend on your phone? Then second question is that, do you feel that whatever that you're consuming,

did you truly learn something, or is it distracting you from doing what you're supposed to be doing? One of the things that I did for my social media was to just shut down the accounts that I don't use. I unfollowed a lot of people because I feel that most people are distracting. I really removed a lot of apps that I felt were not useful.

And the other section was around like physical possessions. So I got rid of a lot of my stuff. As I said, I re-evaluated a lot of my spending habits and where my focus was at because all the time, at that time, I was consistently thinking about what's the next thing I'm going to buy? Oh, this thing looks really cute. Well, it's only $10. dollars well that one's only hundred dollars and eventually i realized that um i was so distracted i accumulated a bunch of like random stuff

more than half of the stuff that i didn't like anyway and that was actually creating more distraction it was creating more stress because now i need to manage all these things um and half of the things i don't even anyway. And it kind of became a mental burden, right? So think about the time that like you have a lot of things in your life. Maybe you just think about your room or your house, your possessions, basically. If you have so many things, then like how can you really focus? Because, you know, if you're already stressful, feeling stressed at work, and then you come home and your house is in a mess or your room is in a mess, that's not a good feeling. At least for me, I didn't feel like I could really focus. I'm like, oh, every time I come home, I see all these things that I have

not organized, all these things that I've just bought, and I was like, oh, okay, not a good situation. So after a lot of determination and really deciding that, okay, you know what, I'm going to do this um one of my my own personal growth goals um was as i said right more more clarity and more simplicity i got rid of a lot of things and i actually you know listed down like a wish list of really the things that i truly truly wanted now i'll share i'll share an interesting thought with you and this is something that i told one of my um clients recently and I said that, you know, a lot of times, we feel like in order to kind of like maximize our dollar, we try to get like a lot of cheap stuff,

thinking that, well, you know, if I really want that, I don't know, high quality t-shirt that costs $100, then I'm not going to get that because it's too expensive. Then I'm just going to get like a bunch of like other t-shirts for like five dollars because you think that you're saving money but the problem is that um the cheap stuff don't last and at the end of the day you end up feeling frustrated because of the poor quality maybe the thing breaks and you feel like there's

even more mental energy of like buying more things that also breaks so another another simple example I can give you is for example right now I have a career coaching and mentoring program it's called the corporate survivor and some people have also come to me telling me that oh mei ping you know I really really really want to join a program you know I really really want to hire you as my coach but but I found this other cheaper coach. So I'm just going to try. I'm like, oh, okay, that's fine. Because, you know, we always make our own choices and that's fine, right? But the thing I've started noticing is that quite a few of them come back after a few months and they told me that, oh, you know what, I've decided to join a program, and I regretted that I didn't join sooner,

because I thought the other options were better, and I went and tried, but at the end of the day, I went one circle, but I'm not, I didn't achieve anything, I got even more confused. So, it's kind of the same concept as well, like, think about, you know, the time that you really wanted something, that you really, really, really wanted, and you told yourself that, well, well, like, think about, you know, the time that you really wanted something, that you really, really, really wanted, and you told yourself that, well, well, I think it's too expensive, I think I can't afford it, let me go and find a cheaper option, like, how many times will you satisfy with that cheaper option, because at the end of the day, that's not really what you want, like, I can share my own personal experience, as well, like, when I was, maybe that was a few years ago, I really wanted this, like, handbag, right, but it it was like, I think $800, $900 or something.

And I told myself, okay, you know, it's too expensive. I'm not going to buy it because it's too expensive, right? Even though, you know, it was great and everything else, I decided not to do it. And eventually I went to do, I went to get other stuff. Now, even though the other bags that I bought were highly functional, it was great, but I never felt satisfied. And every single weekend for the next two years, I've consistently go and look back at this whatever bag that I wanted in the first place. And you might think that, oh, Mei Ping, but you still got the thing that was functional. That's true, but that was not really what I wanted, right? You get what I'm trying to say?

Like, it's like, if you see that dream, whatever, that you want, then, you know, would it be more satisfactory to save and eventually just go and get the thing that you want versus buying 20 versions of supposedly that thing that looks close to the thing that you want versus buying 20 versions of supposedly that thing that looks close to the thing that you want but it's not really what you want right so i'm not saying that you know everybody should just go out there and like buy more things and you know spend money randomly i'm not saying that but what i am saying is that you know if we want to be simple or have more simplicity in what we do and everything, I think the first thing is really to gain clarity on what we truly want and actually just be focused

on the thing that you want, right? If your mind is in a mess, right, messy thoughts, then it will definitely show in your environment, right? So simple example of what I told you just now about buying things. If you're undecided on what you really want you end up buying everything you or you end up trying to buy everything because you want to give it a try but maybe deep down in your heart you know that like that's not really what you want but well i'm just going to give it a try let's just buy like 20 versions of this like cup or something or these 20 versions of these shoes and just see which is better but you actually know that maybe there's that one

thing that you wanted but maybe after one big circle now you have a mess around you you have 20 pairs of shoes that you don't wear and you'll spend probably a lot more money as compared to you have just gotten the first thing in the thing that you really wanted in the first place it's better to have like you know 10 quality things than 100 random things that you don't use. So that's my opinion. That's how I feel that it's easy for me to make decisions because I'm able to focus. I'm not distracted by the noise. And if you're someone who feels like you're struggling

with making decisions, feeling confident in yourself, really listening to yourself, trusting yourself, then you really might want to think about like, how's your environment? How's your house? I mean, how's your home? How's your room? How's your desk, right? How's your environment in general? And even in your digital life as well, you really want to think about like, how many people are you following online, right? Do you even listen to all of them if not then why are you following them and the reason why i feel like i've managed to find more peace calmness and confidence in my life and that's

really one of the things that i did which really helped me a lot so i think the the personal change that i saw in myself like before taking the career break in 2016 and after taking the career break in 2016 is really the ability to be a lot calmer because I feel like now I'm able to, you know, manage my environment and making sure that I don't have that many things that distracts me all the time. One of the best ways I found is to get rid and live simple and be clear of what I want.

I created a wishlist and I work towards getting the stuff or buying the stuff or investing in the stuff that I have on the wishlist, whether it's physical stuff or it's like the digital stuff, like the online stuff, you know, education programs or whatever. Or like I said, the physical stuff, you know, bags and like lifestyle stuff. That's okay.

Once you know that, okay, you know what? I'm not going to get distracted with like this 10,000 things that I'm seeing in shopping malls and online all the time. But I know that, okay, these are the 10 things that I truly truly want and I'm gonna like put them on my wish list and I'm gonna work towards them I feel like there is more clarity if you're able to train yourself to be like this and your environment is definitely one of the enablers as well because I hardly ever see a very successful person that right is in a super chaotic environment and a chaotic mindset all the time because that's just not the quality of a successful person. Because in order to have career success, as I've said many times, you need career clarity, then confidence will come in, competence, and then

you work on your value positioning and online branding to make sure that you can be found by more people. So if you want to learn more about the five-step process that I've just walked through, you can definitely download my free guide which is the five-day career growth guide that will walk you through step by step on nailing down your career clarity, confidence, competence, value positioning and then building your online branding. So if you're missing any one part of it, then it's going to be a mess, okay? So the entire purpose of this episode is to make sure that how you can calm yourself down and not feel like your environment is controlling you, but actually you having the calmness

and ability to be the most productive that you can in your environment. And I think that that's the thing that will give you that inner confidence and inner calmness and inner motivation to really make decisions and to really trust yourself and to move forward.

Okay, with that, I hope that you're going to work on simplifying your lifestyle. And yeah, definitely let me know in the comments if you're watching on YouTube. Have you tried simplifying your lifestyle? How is that working out? Do you find that you have more clarity and focus in your lifestyle? How is that working out?

Do you find that you have more clarity and focus in your life? What's your experience? Share with me in the comments. I'd love to read on it. And if you want to learn more about how to stay focused and any specific topics

that you want to learn about the corporate world, let me know. Drop it in the comments. Then maybe I'll make a video about it. Till then, see you in the next episode. Bye! you you you you you you Thank you. Can I ask for a big salary increment, more than 30%, when negotiating my new job offer? Good question, and this was a question that I got asked on the DM a few days ago. Can I ask for a big salary increment when negotiating my job offer?

So big salary increment, 30, 40, 50%. Can I ask for anything that's more than the norm? So good question. And let me be honest with you and tell that you can ask for whatever number that you want. Here are two things to make sure that you are successful in asking for whatever number that you want. And you want to make sure that you have these two things nailed down before you go and ask for it if you really want to increase your chances for success. The first one is have you packaged your

background skills, experiences and value to convince the hiring manager, HR or recruiter that you are deserving of this big salary increment that you talk about. Now this first thing is really really important to think through is because a lot of people, when they tell me that, hey, maybe, you know, I want to ask for more money, I want to ask for a higher salary, they usually don't have a clear justification for that or they are unable to communicate that justification. So they'll just say that, well, you know, I think I deserve it. I'm like, no, no hiring manager or HR is going to accept that justification because it's not related to your achievements, it's not related to your achievements,

it's not related to a business purpose or it doesn't show what you can contribute in the future. So yes, you can always ask for a big salary increment and I can tell you that, you know, I have clients who join my program, Corporate Survivor, and there were also a few of them who even able to negotiate up to 60-70% of their annual package. And how did they do that? It's because they were able to sell their value and the new company saw it, right? So you can definitely do it. But my question to you is, have you successfully packaged your value

in a way that the other people can understand, right? The new company can understand and say, hey, you know, this candidate is really great because, you know, she can do all these things. And if you were to bring her on, she can definitely achieve all these things. We don't have to worry about him or her. So the first part is your ability to package that. The second part actually is the trickier part and I think a lot of people are not focusing on the second portion. And the second portion to make sure that you are successfully able to negotiate a high salary increment actually comes down to your inner confidence. Now, inner confidence, not just mindset, but your inner belief that you

can truly deliver the value that commensurates the salary that you're asking for. So let me break it down. Now, you know, a lot of people, when they want to ask for a huge salary increment, again, it's based on feelings, it's based on, well, I think online website says that the range should be this much and this much, and therefore, you know, I deserve it. Again, as I told you, you can definitely say this, but how you say this will then reflect your confidence. I think a lot of people, when they want to negotiate their salary, they also sound unsure. So if you sound unsure, it could mean that you're not confident because you yourself are not sure whether you even have the skills and experiences

and you're just trying your luck. And let me tell you that, you know, for most people, you know, trying their luck to ask for a big salary increment, most of the time it's above 30 or 50%, we don't want to rely on luck for that, okay? So if even you have like the perfect script do you have the confidence and true belief that you are worth that money because a lot of people they want to ask but when they communicate it out they don't feel confident and by that time you know the a

lot of the hiring managers in HR they already know that like oh well you're just trying your luck and the chances of you getting it is almost non-existent. The second one is the people who maybe feel like, oh, I'm just entitled to this number because I saw somewhere online that someone else,

similar experiences as me, is making this much and therefore I deserve to get this much. Now, one thing that you're forgetting in this situation is it's not the same company, it's not exactly the same role and the two of you are different people, right? So the portion around like the inner confidence

is that we want to project that you are really, really sure that this is something that you have done before and if they hire you, right, and if they pay you this big salary increment that you're asking for, then you can bring back three times, five times, maybe even ten times the value as well. And you need to really believe it because the way that we communicate also shows how much we believe in what we say. So even if you can say the sentences, you can read the words, but if you don't sound like you're sure,

then you're not going to convince anyone else. And on the flip side, if you try to sound um you know forceful or aggressive then that's not really someone that companies want to hire because they want to make sure that they are hiring someone who can get along with other people and you know a candidate who comes in and like really demanding okay this is what i'm supposed to be earning because someone else is earning that then they are externalizing their value to some other online website and not actually focusing on

what this particular candidate can bring. Does that make sense? So I can tell you the stories of my clients who have been successful to get more than 30% in terms of salary increment for a new job. There's a lot of inner work that needs to be done. And I can tell you that for many of them, they have spent months in the existing job, in their current job, there's a lot of inner work that needs to be done. And I can tell you that for many of them, they have spent months in the existing job, in their current job, actually working to improve

their performance, improve their confidence and competence before they go out there and search for opportunities. And by the time everything is set up right, because they know inside themselves, right, they are very, very clear to say, hey, you know, I have worked hard, I have put in effort to improve my skills and I'm a lot more confident in the way that I communicate. And after going through the jobless lessons that I teach that help them to reposition their value, they are now confidently able to communicate that. And that is a process.

So getting a huge salary increment, 30, 40, like I said, I have clients who manage to get up to 70%. It's not just a matter of like waiting till the salary negotiation, 30 minutes and like trying to convince the hiring manager, it doesn't work like that, right? It comes from your inner belief,

your real skills and believing that, yeah, I'm really worth this much and like this company, it will be a waste if this company doesn't hire me or doesn't see that, I'm just going to try in the next company. That's a big part of that confidence because you know that, you know, you have dedicated the time to improve yourself, right? And then the next part, of course, is the strategy part, right? Really thinking through your value positioning throughout your entire career. And that's something that I definitely teach in my 30-day

job search bonus lessons in the Corporate Survivor, as well as the foundational three-step career growth framework, which is really focused on long-term career development. So you can ask for whatever number that you want, but are you that person who is worth it? And can you convince the company hiring manager, HR recruiter, that you are really worth it? Can you communicate that, articulate that and frame your value in a way that everyone can say that, oh, definitely I want to hire you, definitely I'm just going to pay you whatever that you want because we know that, you know, if you come on, then you're going to be like a huge asset to the team. So, can you answer that

question? If you can answer that question, go and ask for whatever number that you want. Because, you know, I've gotten big salary increments. I've gotten salary increments every single year. I have clients who are able to get like big increments, you know, when they are even doing internal promotion as well as external job offers as well, like more than 30%, right? So work on yourself first

because once you have the inner confidence and knowing that like, hey, you know, the value is in me. The value is not with the company. Yes, I'm in the negotiation with the company, salary negotiation with the company, but the value is always in me. So if this company doesn't see that,

then I can just try it with another company. I can give another company a chance and not, you know, trying to find some magic hack on like, oh, is this the script or should I use this other script? How long should it be?

Exactly what I need to say. No, it doesn't work like that. Okay. So as I said earlier, if you want to learn the step-by-step on creating value positioning, you can definitely download my five day career growth PDF guide. It will walk you through step-by-step on career clarity, job confidence, work competence, value positioning, as well as building your online brands so that you can kickstart your career success journey. With that, I'll see you in the next episode.