Couple Things with Shawn and Andrew - 120 | kaitlyn bristowe + jason tartick

Episode Date: June 22, 2022

In this episode we sat down with one of our favorite couples and friends, kaitlyn bristowe and jason tartick! In one of our most authentic conversations, we talked about the different stages of life, balancing your career and personal life, and how to prioritize your time. Jason just released his book, The Restart Roadmap: Rewire and Reset Your Career and you can grab your copy below! We are sponsored by Better Help ▶ Couple Things listeners get 10% off their first month at BetterHelp.com /EASTFAM. Kaitlyn's Instagram ▶ https://www.instagram.com/kaitlynbristowe/?hl=en Jason's Instagram ▶ https://www.instagram.com/jason_tartick/?hl=en Jason's Book ▶ https://www.amazon.com/Restart-Roadmap-Jason-Tartick/dp/1400226864/ref=sr_1_1?crid=S9DETZ7BNK6U&keywords=The+Restart+Roadmap%3A&qid=1655918957&s=books&sprefix=the+restart+roadmap+%2Cstripbooks%2C65&sr=1-1 Follow My Instagram ▶ http://www.instagram.com/ShawnJohnson Like the Facebook page! ▶ http://www.facebook.com/ShawnJohnson Follow My Twitter ▶ http://www.twitter.com/ShawnJohnson Snapchat! ▶ @ShawneyJ Follow AndrewsTwitter ▶ http://www.twitter.com/AndrewDEast Follow My Instagram ▶ http://www.instagram.com/AndrewDEast Like the Facebook page! ▶ http://www.facebook.com/AndrewDEast Snapchat! ▶ @AndrewDEast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What's up, everybody. Welcome back to a couple things with Sean and Andrew. A podcast all about couples and the things they go through. Our favorite couple is back. We are playing favorites, yes. Caitlin Bristow and Jason Tardick. We interviewed these two about two years ago. No, three and a half years ago. Get real. No, two. I don't know. You're wrong.

Okay. They weren't engaged. Correct. Now they are engaged. And boy has a lot happened since we last spoke. Caitlin has hosted The Bachelorette several times. Yeah, big time. She's one dancing with the stars. One time. Jason released a book.

His career took off. They moved in together. They got engaged. Caitlin has been on tour. There have been so many life milestone roller coasters that they've had to go through. And we get to sit down and talk about all of it. I really enjoyed this conversation. It was on the longer side of what we're used to doing.

but every moment of it, I feel like, was kind of insightful, if you will. And we talked about a lot of things, including how do you balance career ambitions with prioritizing your family, tough thing that we struggle with and talk about all the time? I will say, I really felt like we related to them more than we ever have in this interview because what they're going through right now and all of those life milestones is everything that we have gone through in the past six years. And especially seeing them be engaged and go through it, we just really got to talk about some like the deeper sides of relationship,

which is really cool. So we're excited to share this episode with you. Excited to hear your feedback. And before we jump in, please subscribe to the show and give it a rating on whatever platform you're listening on. That's our favor to ask of you now. Thank you to Jason and Caitlin for sitting down with us.

And thank you for listening. Without further ado, we bring you Caitlin Bristow and Jason Tardick. I'll say something. I'll have some bad a day or experience and I'll be like venting about it and he'll give me a solution. I'm like, I don't want a solution. Stop giving me a solution. Caitlin now starts those vents with before I vent. I'm telling you, I don't need a solution.

I like that. I just need that awareness. And I'm like, well, I need that expectation. I will. Yeah. Oh, gosh. Yeah. I just want you to like hug me and say, wow, that must have been really hard.

Exactly. exactly that's all I want but he's like gets out a spreadsheet yeah or it's together a PowerPoint presentation or if something happens to like just call them I'm like no that's not an option here I just need to tell you about it I do have a soft spot of my heart for PowerPoint presentations he does okay go on one of my Christmas presents to Sean was a PowerPoint presentation every year I bet it was romantic though every year it is actually I would highly encourage this we started doing this three years ago four years ago but like we got tired of trying to like figure out what gifts we wanted so instead of doing gifts we do presentations to each other of and we'll like figure

out a category each year but like last year it was vacations so he would pitch to me his top three like dream vacations for that year and i would do the i like i would do the same thing and then we each get to pick one but you got that's amazing really got to sell it you're like yeah i'm talking breweries I'm talking views. I'm talking Asheville, North Carolina. The year before, we really wanted a new art piece for our house. So, like, we had to pitch each other, like, three pieces of art. It was, it's so cheesy.

But it's actually really fun. I don't like that, but I would be, you would be so good at that. And I hate being bad at things, and I would be really bad at that. Yeah. How long have you been doing this? Three years. I'm not saying this because we're on camera. I mean this.

Like, if someone said to you, think about the five healthiest couples of people you know, I would put you two in that way. Yes. Based off of what. On the same team, you just think, like, you're like,

why don't you get into your gifts? Like, that's like, they can experience out of it. And you want to, like, you both want to include your friends and things

and, like, have special time and, like, quality time. Just on the same page and, like, everything. Thanks,

guys. What's the secret? Speaking of, I'll get to that question. Speaking of including friends, I just, I just want to spend more time with you guys.

We love it. Even though we miss the last game night. Can you move closer to like an hour away than what you are? Yeah, you live. I'm sick of living in Kentucky. I am sick of it. I'm kidding.

It used to be so convenient for flying all the time. No, we're not kidding. Yeah, no, we need to move. Yeah. I want to hear your take on this because I do one thing. I just, I feel like you and I kind of think similarly as Caitlin was looting to. But it's always, I view our relationship. I'm also not saying we're doing it right, but I view our relationship as like,

like practice like when i'm practicing for football it's like all right i got to show up and do something different today than i did yesterday to see if it helps me perform better than it did before so like really like we just i don't know you both have the athlete mindset yeah yeah where it's like all right we got to improve this and so like we argued about dogs yesterday and we're arguing about it again today how can we approach it differently dogs yeah that's then you're doing just fine Yeah, that's pretty good. You're just arguing about the dogs. That is really good.

What's your approach to your relationship? I think the approach is kind of like what we talked about earlier, like how when we have these like big blowups or when we're having issues, do we try and get to the core of it and then talk about it and try to do our best and not let it repeat? I think it's something that we're not maybe the best at. No, we suck. But it's definitely like something that I think you try to do.

Because if you just keep, you're going to bang your head on the wall. 100 times over if you're repeating the same fundamental issues over and over. That might be a me problem. I am like, I do arguments like I do a Taylor Swift song. Like I just beat a dead horse and I just put it on repeat and I can't get over it until I am and then it's done. I'm the same way though. She's laughing hysterically.

You're like, God. That in the yard. Right. Hey, we've all got something to work on. That might be mine. I just, I don't know what it is because I think I used to pride myself on getting over things really fast. And now I've changed into more of a stubborn human being where I don't get over things as fast. I don't know why.

I don't know what you're supposed to grow and evolve as a woman and I'm going backwards. Well, so on that point, and I would, this is where I maybe slightly disagree with you. Like, I've changed my mindset to, hey, I'm going to try to never have this argument. again with Sean more towards actually we're probably going to have a similar argument like this again I will bring it up again so yeah making it less about what can Sean do different in the argument and like what can we do different it's like oh no what can I do different next time approaching it and that's where I think the power of like long term relationships you guys been together for how long three and a half years where it's like you're gonna you're gonna have repeat conflict

or repeat situations in general. And it's like there's so much self-improvement that can happen when you're forced to realize, all right, freaking, this is the 18th time we've talked about the dishes. And the first 17 didn't go well. So how can I approach it differently? So I completely agree with that.

But I would say that usually when those dish conversations come up, it's not actually the dishes. No. So like what I want to know is like what, like to me, I have this like rational mindset right so I'm logical so if it doesn't if if the reaction or something isn't logical in my head I'm like well I have to figure out what the root like where's the cap and what's going on like what is the true you say that but in the moment in the moment I go the same way I'm like clearly this can't be about the dishes like but you're like no it is and you don't because sometimes

you just don't want to go there so you'll and I'm like what is the root of the problem I say that That happens with us so much, and I feel like it happens with people who, like, start to know each other really well. I know when it's not about the actual topic before he does. Like, we'll start arguing, and he'll be in a mood of some kind. No. Yes. Yes. And I will be like, it's not the freaking dishes.

I know it's not the freaking dishes. It's like something that happened earlier today that put you in a bum mood, and now you're taking it out on the freaking dishes. Does Caitlin do this where, like, one day, you're not always. Full hype mode, Jason. Like, some days you're just like, oh, I'm chill today. And Sean will be like, Andrew, what's wrong? And I'm like, nothing. And then she's like, well, you said nothing.

So now I know something's wrong. I'm like, leave me the freak alone. What? Let me just live my life. I actually like when Jason takes it from a mock 10 to a mock two. Yeah, I'm usually, I'm usually the opposite. Like, what's wrong? What's the problem today? What's going on?

I, me that you're usually like that to me? Yeah. Yeah, I've been really grumpy lately. Yeah. I don't know what it is. If it's, I always blame the moon. Yeah. Must be the moon.

Mercury and Gatorade. Retro grade. Whatever. She was a camera going to catch me one day and just like motherfucking. Yeah. No, no, that was a confession. That was a confession on my podcast the other day. I had like this astrologist on.

And my confession to her was that I got mad at the moon the other day. Because I was like asking the universe for signs and like, all this stuff that I do and they didn't give it to me and I went to let out the dogs and I saw the moon out of the corner of my eye and I was like I genuinely felt mad at the moon I blamed it for my own problems yeah I did I also don't know if you ever do this this is my psycho side sometimes I'll be starting arguments or I'll be in a mood and I I know it oh yeah Like my sane side is like, what is going wrong? Yeah, you have like an out-of-body experience.

Exactly. But I still go. Yeah. I'm still like, bring it on. Is it when you're hormonal because it's stronger than me? Probably. My hormones are stronger than me. They take over.

And I have a tiny little rational part of my brain. Yeah, exactly. And that part is like, you're doing it. And then I have like an argument with myself in my brain where I'm like, it's not because I'm hormonal. And then the rational side is like, it is. If you check the calendar. It definitely is, and I'm like, but I don't want you to be right.

And I don't know why my brain isn't on the same team as me. I don't get it. Yeah, same. It happens a lot. And then later on, I'll come around. You guys are like, oh my God. Later, like, later on I'll come around and be like, babe, like, I knew, like, I know I was being crazy. Well, at least you come around.

See, I think one of the problems I do is like in those times where I know there's not one thing I could do right, say, or there's literally nothing I could do that's going to turn good. There's a few things. I will just withhold. I've sent you an email about it. I will just, like, withhold. So I won't say anything. So, like, then I won't say anything. I'll be like, nope, I'm not going to bring that.

I'm not going to talk about that. I'm just not stepping into that. And then it'll be, like, a week later. And then she'll actually, like, say something to me. And then I have this, like, buildup of a lot. I'm like, well, what about this? This, this, this. Because I didn't say anything for a week because I'm, like, worried about the reaction during that time.

My period app sends him emails about the phase I'm in during the month. That's actually smart. And it'll give suggestions. Have you ever read? it's not it's not i have you want to get sick there's 48,834 unread emails in my inbox and they're all about her no no okay that should be a flagged most important email in your inbox i know but sometimes they get like yellow starred yeah i i can't sometimes they write the emails and i'm with them and then they start going into the moon stuff and i get lost like energies and stuff and i'm not saying

it's a bad thing i just don't i don't i don't jason researches everything on the planet just do a little research into the planets. Who was that the lady with the school bus? She was big on the planets. Mrs. Frizzle. Oh my gosh. What a poll. I remember the book with like all the planets.

Yeah, Mrs. Frizzle, the magic school bus. Was she big into astrology though? Yes, she did like, really? We loved the planets. I think you would, wouldn't you take the bus to our space? Yeah, you took the best out of space. Not every time. Sometimes you go in water.

No, but if you like learned astrology that day. Oh, yeah. Astrology is not the same as astronomy. no astrology is like moon energy astronomy is like planets oh right she liked astronomy I am not Mrs. Rizzle

I missed that book nor did Bill Nye I didn't get that last that was a fun throwback that was a great when they used to roll the TV card in the classroom you're like game time boy

let's go she's still around she still go this is frizzle no magic school bus it's not That would be a very outdated cartoon. It's on YouTube, I'm sure. Yeah.

Yeah. Wait, I have a question. I'm curious. So it's not very often or like every day that you find couples. I feel like we're similar this way. You both are very like headstrong. Both of you. Yes.

Like vary within like your ways, your opinions. You have your own careers. You're very like independent. How does that work within like your relationship? It is probably our biggest. challenge i i think that is what like you two are very much on the same page with everything you do no oh not even remotely okay yeah thank god so much better okay i feel like we are all those things you said are so true and it's such a

challenge for us because at the end of the day we're so tired and like mentally drained that we're like we could talk about stuff or we could put on a show or like do something something else and we like forget to get back on the same page because we're so focused on our own things and then that builds up and then we realize oh we haven't been on the same page in a while we're in the same city because we're doing such different things um so that's definitely a challenge i think we could probably work on a little better is getting like like having us time or making our relationship more of a priority because our work is so important to us that we don't balance it out enough with making our relationship as important as well as we're

work. Yeah, it just sucks. Sometimes we do. We're just in a phase right now where we're just like, yeah, but I think to your point, like we were both very independent. We're both headstrong. We're both like very stubborn. So that creates a lot of conflict in the fact that sometimes conflict leads with ego

and it does not leave with any bit of ration. Like there's no or just like logic. Like what are we doing? Yeah. We're just like spinning our tires for what. Like where are we? We're not even getting anywhere. Yeah.

And so I think that is, that is definitely interesting. But also the part of our lives, we don't, the solution. Yeah, to our problem. It's probably therapy. Well, we all know I'm all about therapy. But I think one of the other things, too, is like we live in these worlds where it's so different than if like we had like nine to five professions, right? Because there becomes more routine, there becomes easier ability to forecast and

project and plan and our worlds are just so all over the place like i don't know okay boom i got to go to new york for five days this came up literally two days ago and it's like whoa i thought we were doing this this and this and i think it does create um i think we're both blessed to have those things but it's also like with something that we respect about each other but something that also gets in the way oh yeah you know totally that's we we saw marriage uh counselor a couple months ago and she was like all right describe what you love about sean and then she said describe what you

find most frustrating about Sean she was like did you notice how they're pretty much the same thing yeah because for me it's like I love Sean's ambition and her vision and she's always like

making things happen and I'm like but she never lets me chill out yeah she's like they kind of go hand in hands like the thing you love most about someone also can can be the most aggravating

and the way she said it to you is like what you find most attractive at the beginning yeah every human being tries to change their spouse later on in life into themselves

like they try to be the, like, they want them to be them. That is so true. Yeah. So you, like, you look for the opposite, and then long term, you, you want the same person as yourself because it's easier to live with. And you forget that's actually why you love them. That's like, when I first met Jason, one of my favorite things is that he would sing

musicals at the top of his lungs. What? That's what Andrew does. Come on. Let's go on. You guys get that punch out of camera? That's going to be a great cover. I didn't mean to.

I didn't mean to. I already got my background from hockey. You got a bloody lip. Oh, my God. Did you guys? What's your favorite? I did. I caught a lip.

I caught a lip. It was a thumb to that. Okay. It was my bad. Oh, dude. It was Lion King yesterday. Oh, yes. My favorite.

Yeah. That literally is his favorite. Music man. Jason, I'm very sorry. My husband just punched you on the face. Oh, no, no. It was not a pure excitement. The intent was great.

And my face could handle it. Why, man? Okay. But to your point. Circling back. That is, and like yesterday you were singing, and I was like, why are you trying so hard? Like, just sing like, just sing. And he's like, you're singing, oh, Canada or something.

Oh, God, not that. You do. And I'm like, just sing it normal. And then I'm like, that is literally one of the. reasons I was like that's my person is because of how you used to sing and like and now you're right way saying now I'm like oh anders is he tries to become darius rucker like twang and all and I'm like that's not you well when I'm singing wagon wheel wagon wheel wagon wheel what is you supposed to not try it's called being a dynamic

oh okay singer also when I'm singing around the house that means I'm like happy so let me just live in that happiness for that but it sometimes it sometimes is so loud I'm like I just want it to be quiet you would you can admit you're quite loud like a human as a human yeah oh yeah yeah yeah yeah and see you want to be like just let me be happy and i'm like sometimes i'm like just let me be actually depressed and like stay in bed and cry just let me have that yeah i want to circle back you said at the end of the day you're tired and you just want to put on a show that's like i feel like the story of how it can go no matter what the situation is like whether you're working a nine to five or something just that's just crazy but i'm i've been

been thinking about the importance of like maintenance versus versus if the the upstart cost of like taking something from zero to one is way harder than like keeping something at one if you maintain it does that make sense I don't know if I'm verbalizing that right but like so sean and I have tried to solve that problem because with kids and work and all this stuff there's a ton of logistics so at the end of the night when we put the kids down we're both dead tired and sometimes most of the time we'll miss it but sometimes we'll be like all right we're going to take 10 minutes and just talk about the day talk about what's coming tomorrow and so we're both on the same page as far as logistic wise and then it's like a lot of times that'll that'll just like open up

the floor for Sean was like hey I didn't appreciate when you said X Y C instead of heat at the moment you could talk about it later we call it bedtime so it's like whether we drink glass of water or glass of wine or whatever it's just like we sit down we have one drink together. Yeah. And then we go separate ways. And usually a lot of times we'll come in. And that'll be like coming off of an argument, it's like, I really want to do it.

We're not making contact. We're like, all right, babe, tomorrow. Yeah. Tomorrow. This is why they're top five. But how long have you two been together? Ten years. Okay.

Is the seven year itch real? What do you mean? What does that mean? I'm so curious. What? Never heard of it. The seven year it's where it's, I'm going to literally just Google it and see what it said like like a it's good or you want something different discontent like a rough start

like a rough patch yes so okay it says the seven year itch is a popular belief sometimes quoted as having psychological backing that happiness in a marriage or long-term romantic relationship declines after seven years i think it's the opposite we're only at six but at five years married i've never heard i would say like zero to one we were like increasing and then like one to three was like all right freaking and then like five i was like all right yeah i accept sean for who she is actually we went we uh i just wrote this whole dissertation right i just five years we'll unpack that tonight hold on hold on hold on hold on yes i just wrote uh my buddy jordan you know jordan rogers right he just got married and i wrote him this dissertation on why i think marriage is the

best i'll see if i can find it literally but they walked up in the middle night one night I'm going to write a dissertation on marriage. I was like, wow, go to bed. That's how my brain works. I shut it off. Like,

when I go to sleep, Jason can wake up at 4 in the morning and start, like, thinking about work. And I'm like, yeah, you guys are, no,

and I get pissed. I'm like, oh, yeah, I don't. That's why I just get up. I just get out of the house. Yeah, and he starts banging around the coffee machine

at 4.30 in the morning. I'm like, somebody else is still sleeping here. Yeah. Okay, so they wrote, or I found that there are different. Yeah,

they, but I pulled it from different, like people had different phases that you go through in marriage. So the first phase is like the honeymoon phase where everything feels fresh, new, and exciting. And you don't really realize your partner's flaws or you tolerate them because of like this overall. You like find them endearing. Yes. Then the second phase is the power struggle phase where the dynamics of the relationship begin to like materialize. Like okay, whose career is going to take precedence, whose schedule is going to take precedence, yada, yada.

Like who's going to take out the trash and figure out all. these like little logistics um i wrote a couple paragraphs on that and then it's the stability stage where you accept your partner as a as a unique individual so it's like hey you know what sean actually she just is a go-getter like and i'm as opposed to trying to fight that it's like i accept it and then you go through the commitment stage um where you recognize that there is no ideal partner or ideal relationship you just choose to commit to the individual that you married just because it's a choice And then it's this, the last one is a co-creation stage where you and your partner both, let's see, consciously choose to benefit other people, whether it be kids or like your community and whatever sense. So anyway, I will say, though, the seven-year thing, we haven't hit seven years of marriage yet.

Is that this year? No, we passed our anniversary. Oh, we're at six. We had our sixth year anniversary this year. Which is amazing. Yeah, but we've been together 10 years. And I definitely feel like, I don't know if I believe in like the seven year. Right.

But we've definitely gone through phases of like, this is rough. Yeah. And like our marriage is hard. Yeah. And I think you just naturally as a human being go through so many different thoughts of like everything. Yeah. And I do believe every single year, though, as a whole. it's gotten so much better.

Oh, that's amazing. Yeah. It hasn't gotten easier. But like, if I were to like, I always try to say this. If I were, I wish, like, him and I could get married in the phase we're at right now. Because I love him in such a, like, deeper, stronger way than I ever could have possibly thought at our wedding. Really? Oh, my gosh.

Because, like, at our wedding, everything was so giddy. and just like naive and we were just like oh i can't wait for the future it's going to be great he's the one this is perfect and easy and then you go through life and you go through rough stuff and you go through like the ups and downs of babies and like just careers and when you get through all of that it makes your like bond so much stronger yeah so any doubts or questions or just human like a side that you've ever had or thought really just kind of doesn't go away but it gets so much easier because you're like this is my this is my person yeah you're like I've been through everything everything and we did it together yeah what year in your relationship did you guys

get married three three yeah I'm just thinking about there on your I'm just thinking yeah I will say though we got married year three together but we were 23 24 24 and he had just graduated college and we were like in a very weird phase of life to begin with because we were both in like massive career transitions we were trying to buy our first house together he was bouncing around the NFL like there were a lot of very difficult things within our marriage then that made our first year of marriage um really difficult yeah that's that's a lot like those are a lot of big life changing and like pivotal moments as a first year of a married couple So, bouncing it back to you guys.

Yes. We interviewed you guys three years ago. Yes. And you weren't engaged. You had just moved in together. We were in the hymen. Yeah. Just got ramen.

Yeah. Give me the roller coaster overview of the phases you've gone through in the past three years. All of them. Yeah. And now we want babies. No, I'm just kidding. Well, we do. Do you want to take this?

No, I think you might be good at this one. You think? Well, we'll see. All right. Here's what I think. So come up a bedtime later. Yeah. We went through for sure honeymoon.

Oh my gosh. Yeah. I mean, couldn't keep our hands off each other. Okay. Yeah. I mean, like it was like. And like for a long time. Yeah.

Like I remember you talking to someone being like, we're still in the honeymoon phase. And she was like, yeah, right. Yeah. And we're like, we really are. For a while. Yeah. And then I think in our lives were moving so fast and there was so much change. You know, it was like super like sexy and fun.

And then pandemic hit. Right. So now it's like we're always on the road, pretty much living relationships, like pretty much like a long distance relationship because we meet at the weekends at the house. Like we were so busy. And pandemic hit. And I think the stage was like, holy shit. Like we got to relearn how to live together. And then there was this time where.

And we didn't live together at all. No, but then work wasn't the priority because there was no work. That's true. And it was so much fun. Yeah. It was like, I would say like that was the most fun. part of our relationship because we didn't have to go, you know, give content out or go do this or go to this meeting or go do this.

It was like we re-learned to live with each other and then enjoyed it. Like played games. Have a drink at, you know, three because we had nothing to do, whatever it was, cooked together. And it was like this insane like engagement with one another. And then your season re-aired. So they did the greatest season. And that was when Caitlin got asked to go and dance with the stars.

And so that like tightness, like the world started open. opportunity started to come up and it got full speed in moving opposite directions. I mean, my businesses took off and I think what happened was for literally like 18. I mean, my businesses took off. I'm just crushing it. I was saying dancing with the stars. My business took off. Then you got the hosting game.

I mean, everyone knows all the success. You're bad. No, I'm just. Yeah, you casually hosted. Yeah, like just had like 15 jobs, but 18 months of just like living in different worlds. And then I think what happened was after day. with the stars tour it was like we had to kind of relive that stage of the pandemic like okay we're back under this roof we're back here for seven days a week and let's get on the same schedule

and there's so much pressure for wedding planning right now because we're engaged that we're like we're just trying to get back on the same page so like little wedding details come up like we still plan on getting married everybody um like we have a wedding planner and we have venues that we want to do and all the stuff but to actually sit down and be like, okay, let's set the date. Like, we're like, no, let's get back on the same page first and, like, read, you know, get back in that phase where we feel, like, excited to plan a wedding instead of feeling like we're doing it because we have to right now. Yeah. Because we've enjoyed being engaged. And I don't want, I think we both don't want, like, a long marriage before kids.

We're like, okay, it's a long engagement. We're going to get married and we're going to have kids. Like, that's, I think, we both feel. Yeah. No, we do. And I think the thing is, too, is it's also figuring out, like, hey, where do we, we, I come from the Northeast and you come from far west in Canada. For some reason, after three years, we still are just now having these conversations of like, we've never even bought a house together. Right. Like, these are the conversations we're having, right? We just got a bank account together. Like, we're like slowly getting this together that, like we, so these are the types of conversations we're having it. Yeah. It's pretty crazy because I'm, I'm, I'm turning.

turning 37 this month in like 10 days and I have this thing in my head of we should be married because my body needs to have babies and blah blah but I don't know I've got my eggs frozen they're good right I think all that's a myth anymore anyways yeah that's true but I dig back to the question is a wild roller coaster that has come full circle like we've seen all the different stages and now we're coming back I think to where we were probably like June and 2020, like April 2020, which is wild. Which is a good face. Which is a good face.

It's getting to the good face. It's getting back on the same page. Yeah. Yeah, which is a good thing. You know what I mean? Yeah. Like you sit down with anyone and then you tell them, okay, from the last 18 months, your fiance has lived here, here, here, and then you lived here, here, here, and then you lived here,

here, here, and then you had to split the dogs and drive across country to see each other. And this is what's happened. And now you're back on the same roof. There's going to be hurdles and challenges. and re-planning and reconnecting. It has to be done. And so I think that is like the stage we're in right now. Speaking of restart.

Yeah. Jason wrote a book. Which released April 4th? No, I was for you. Because you were like re-saying all these re. Yeah, so you were saying all these re-s. So I was like, my brain went to. I was like rewired.

Yeah. I finished this book a month ago. Jason wrote it. It came out April of 2022. Um, and it's, it's all about how you can, it's your pivot from your previous career into what you're doing now. And the, is it eight steps? Yep, eight steps to what, from what you learned and, and how other people can kind of make that transition themselves. I found it really helpful.

Uh, I've been through some transitions myself and I feel like this was spot on. Uh, I do have, you know, my podcast redirected, which is all about transitions, way less, um, helpful and structured than this was. but is awesome. And also there's an audio book. So if you want to fall asleep to Jason. That's what you're in. I did. I did.

I'm not going to lie. That's amazing. To make like a parallel, hopefully like light at the end of the tunnel for you guys. I feel like we can relate so much to your roller coaster every three years. So it was right after we got married. But on our third year together, I went on tour.

Same exact time. Did the whole bounce around the country. Andrew bounced down the end. NFL our careers went in opposite directions we didn't live together we are newlyweds wow and coming back from that it took a it took a while because you learn how to live like you guys are a couple and you're connected and then you go live so independently and relearn how to be by yourself and then you come back together and you're like wait how do how do we do this again wait you're annoying cadence, your warning cadence, like your routines, and you're like, whoa, like everything gets thrown

and you're so used to putting yourself first that you naturally just come home and do that. And when we're both doing that, which I assume you two, we're both doing too, that creates some problems. I feel like it was a year after tour, after NFL, when we moved in together and everything, it was the most in love I'd ever been with him. because I was just like the independence like we both enjoyed but I enjoyed being back with him so much more after we learned to be back together yeah that makes sense yeah do you foresee a point in your life or careers where you're like starting to say no to this five-day trip to

New York or no to hosting because all right so background Sean and I get our hands involved like we always have a lot going on which the downside is we're always busy but the upside is it especially with kids it forces us to like make boundaries so it's like all right we have so much going on we can't do this anymore we have to do this we have to have this schedule we can't take this trip this you know what I'm saying so it's like it's forced us to carve out boundaries yeah I have a hard time saying no to a lot of things because they're all things I'm like dreaming of doing It's not like I'm just saying yes to it because it's there I'm like holy crap that is a dream come true

Or like this is life changing Or this is what I've like manifested So it's not like I'm saying yes to like Things that I don't want to do It's just they've been taking up so much time Like hosting The Bachelorette is two months of being gone And then they did back to back Bachelorette So then I was gone another two months

And I'm like I can say no to these opportunities That I'm like so excited about But now I think about that as what like moving forward i think we talk about that actually is saying no to some things in the future to make more time for us we've talked about that yeah i think what in like defend your point i think one of the issues is we the worlds we come from are so weird in the fact that katelyn's like depressed on her mom's couch trying to be a manager at a restaurant knowing this is in her past when this wasn't recently yeah i was like wow

You're going to finish is, right? So you're depressed and you're in the late 20s. And I'm in a position in my career. I'm like so unhappy. I have no connection with anything in my life except work. And then you both are asked to go on this reality show. And somehow this one show propels all these random things and opportunities and platform. And then from it, you've been able to do something to build it a little bit greater than that.

And so these opportunities come up. And just a few years ago, I was miserable in a suit reporting to boss as I couldn't stand. And Caitlin was dealing with the stuff she had to deal with at the restaurant. He had a frigging care bearer that I would cuddle and cry myself to see. But I think the thing is it changed so drastically and so fast that you go from that to then ABC coming at your door saying, we want you to host the show, here's some big dollars to do it. And you're just blown away at like how it happens. So to say no, it becomes so much more challenging.

Yeah. Because you're like, I can't go back to that. I got to keep making the mind. I got to keep stacking what I got to do to not go back to that. And we both have the what's next mentality, which is, you know, I was going to say. I feel like the two of you can understand that. Like, okay, but what's next? And then you're in it.

Like when I won Dancing with the Stars, I was like, okay, like, what is this supposed to feel like? I'm supposed to like, I've achieved what I've worked so hard for. And then you feel the exact same like you're obviously excited and thrilled and so proud. You're like, oh, crap, what do I do now? But now I'm like, but I hit the top there. So now what? And then I felt like I was starting from the bottom again.

And then you're like, what else can I achieve that is life changing? And then if you're not doing life changing accomplishments, you feel like a failure, which is stupid. And in this world, it moves so quickly. Yeah. Like one week, things are fly and you are crushing it. Deals are coming in. Opportunities are being called. And it's like a month goes by and it feels like a year.

Mm-hmm. If things aren't on the right trajectory. Yeah. And it changes so quickly. The volatility in the world is just kind of wild in this case, too. One of my best friends just challenged me with this. I'll toss it your way. I apologize if it's too aggressive.

But I've never actually asked myself this question. He's like, you need to figure out when is enough enough. Yeah. And I'm like, Rick. Yeah. And because I guess these are all interchangeable ideas, but like, good is the enemy, a grade is something that you hear? It's like, okay, what are my power?

What is the most important thing to me? It's like freaking my kids are and my marriages. When and then when is all of this enough? Yeah. So I interviewed Molly Bloom and she. Love Molly. Who's that? She is unbelievable.

I'm obsessed with it. So you need to watch the Molly. She's amazing. So we're really good. We're really close with Jeremy Bloom. Okay. Her brother. Molly Bloom.

Yeah. Watch Molly's game. It's a movie. Watch it tonight. You will know everything you need to know about the entire Bloom family. Okay. Fascinating. It's crazy.

It's a story of when is enough enough. Right. She had crazy stories, too. Like the mafia was down her. Oh, no. With the gun saying, like, I want your game. Just create FBI. You take her down.

Anyway. But she's at a party with this massive hedge fund manager. is laughing at this famous author and I'm blaming on his name, blanking on his name. But they laughed and said, I made more money today than you've made your entire career selling books

and you've sold $8 million. And his exact response was, but you want to know the difference between you and I? Like, what's that? I have enough. You never went. Oh, chills, dude. The whole entire room went like silent.

And it was his part, the guy who was throwing the party, like, put it on me, it was spectacular. Molly was like, the whole room went silent. It was a comment that I'll never forget. That is the ultimate mic drop. But I mean, it's like you're being a dixian. I married more money at a day than you've made in your career.

And he's like, but I have enough. Yeah. And it's such a good point because you will be chasing your entire life for the next thing. How do you get there? How do you get to a point in your life where you feel like you have enough as somebody, like, as all of us can feel like what's the next thing and what's? So I don't know. But I think my current thought is,

you don't you're not waiting to get to that point you set the point yeah and you're like you know you hear about all these that was me winning dancing with the service and I got there I was like now what yeah I that was I set the bar we're looking at you guys like you're there right there we don't know I will say something that personally helped me I don't know about you but something that completely changed my world like in regards to where is our bar set what am I going to extend myself to do what sacrifice I'm going am I going to make kids changed everything absolutely everything because what used to be a hard sacrifice but one that we would make is like oh I'm going to take this opportunity and I'm going to move for two months we're not going to see

each other like we made that sacrifice to do that with kids I just am incapable of doing it and it's just not worth it I get I think it would be the same way when you have when I had kids like for me personally an opportunity would arise and I would look at I would ask to negotiate, be like, can I bring my kids? Can we do this? Can we do that? And if we couldn't, to me, it was like, oh, this is easy. We're not going to do it. Right, right. And things just got so much easier. Yeah, because, I mean, kids are such a, obviously your biggest priority. But, like, they just change your whole life and make you see the world differently. Oh, so differently. Yeah. So, like, what's your dream job? Like, right now. I got it. Yeah. Being mom. And I didn't think I'd ever say that I really didn't think I'd ever say that ever Because I was always like ambition career driven And I still have all of those ambitions

Yeah Like we just made A goal of ours is to donate like $100 million to charity Yeah Is it 100 or 10? Did I just add an extra zero? It's pretty good

You should clarify that goal because they're different Those are yeah I'm just going to say 100 It's 100 That's what you said is it's 100 um and i still have that ambition and that like drive and like dream but i won't sacrifice my children for that and even at the end of the day when we're like working towards all of this if it's if it jeopardizes my time with kids i will i'll quit this in a second what makes you happy

like when you look at your career what is what you take away from your career that like fills you it's different before kids and after kids before kids before kids it was the feeling of success and respect that, like, the world sees in me. Now it's how my kids perceive me. Yeah. So. That's beautiful. Whatever opportunity it is, if they grow up to look at it and it's some material thing,

they're not going to care. But if it's a legacy thing, they will care. That's awesome. So it just changes. Yeah. So for you guys, what's your next step in your relationship? and I'm not talking like marriage but what is the next

milestone you're working for whether it's like to reconnect or to move in or to what is it I don't know well when you say reconnect I'm like I think that is like my number one priority right now I think it's yours too

I think it is but I think that's like such a priority because we have just been on such different pages for so long and we do want that next step to be marriage that reconnecting which we're working on um the other night we had like the nicest night we played cornhole and had a bottle of wine and like listen to music and chatted and just hung out which was really nice um so yeah and i think i think marriage is like you said it doesn't have to be but i think it is the next milestone for us yeah oh no no no no i was thinking about the night del a hurrying it question yeah yeah totally okay

I would have done the same thing. Oh, no, no, no. Sorry, that was bad timing. I was thinking, I was going to say, yeah, and then, like, bounce off of what you said. Go on? I think it's getting, because I'm trying to, like, really think what it is.

I think it's, like, we play for different teams right now. We have different people we work with. We don't do things together. We live in two different worlds. And I think the next step is, like, taking your team and my team and creating one team. Oh, see, I'm not on the same page there. Yeah, no, but I'm saying, like,

Not with work stuff, but like looking at things like this is, like you and I are not only a relationship, but like an entity for hopefully kids and family and other things. And just thinking more about us as one as opposed to Jason's over here in New York and Caitlin's out of his tour in Canada and then we're over like putting it together for one team. Yeah, that's a good point because that's what marriage is too. you know like we have to think about what the definition of marriage is to the both of us and i think it is being like we're not just katelyn and jason anymore like we are yeah together as one for the rest of our lives right and i think we have hard time with being like yeah just professionally and providing that's the dream i was i didn't think you're going to say that

because the my next question was going to be suppose you had this hosting gma whatever it is i'm making this up my curiosity would be well if that was like you're going to say that was like you're your number one goal, how would you balance if that opportunity came today with everything you have going on today and your family? And obviously that wasn't your answer. And I think like having an answer like that is like the dream, right? That is like the absolute dream. I have to think more about it. But like I think like having some type of impact where you're like, and I know this is cliche exactly start, but like really changing someone's lives. Because I think it could be done so quickly. But you are doing that. From someone from like homeless to finding success.

or terrible health to finding their happiness. Like, I think there's so many things that we can do with the platform and resources we have to, like, really quickly make small adjustments to really change someone. But I feel like you're doing that. And that's, I want to keep doing that in a larger scale. Yeah.

And I'm sure I have a ton of, I could sit here for an hour and talk about that, but I'm not going to afford you. Oh, thank her. She's giving you love, bro. Yeah. Oh, thank you. I really know.

I was like, you're doing that. Yeah. You're doing that. like tell me what's next what's your dream you said you're waiting on the universe to like tell you something or other what was your what do you wait on i do actually have like i feel like i am doing exactly what i want to be doing in my life right now like podcasting is one of my favorite things to do i absolutely love just having like an hour conversation with somebody where we're just like no phones and like having genuine conversation and i feel like because of the community

from off the vine like i will go on the facebook group and just like cry my eyes out reading people connecting through that and just like I feel like my dream job is to like build this community of like empowered women I feel like I've done that which is great and then I have a wine label which has always been a dream for me but I just like like what you said it's always about like but on a bigger scale so like I want my wine to be in Target I want it to be like available everywhere I want my podcast to like become a TV show on Netflix like I that but I'm I feel like I'm happy doing what I'm doing right now with Amex Platte them. Access to exclusive Amex

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is brought to you by BetterHelp. Can I just say something, babe? Go right ahead, darling. Life can be stressful sometimes and with everything we have going on, which is like kids, businesses, are life, just all of it. Just life can be stressful. Literally.

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This is, I think money is super helpful to put, like, just in the sense of putting a dollar value to things. And if you think about, like, your time in the same way, where it's like, all right, just talking about the tour, which I don't know, how long is this tour you're about to do in Canada? It's about 10 days. Okay. So that's, that's, like, kind of manageable. But if you were talking about, like, a three-month tour, actually stepping back and being like, okay, how much money is this going? And there's other factors like you connecting with the fans is amazing.

It's so special. We did a seven-stop tour and it was like so fun, right? Because you meet people. But stepping back and be like, okay, I'm going to make X amount of money, but I'm going to be gone from Jason for three months. Like what is like not to put a dollar value on that? But I don't really have a dollar value because, I mean, I do. You know, of course I do.

But like going on tour with Dancing with the Stars, it was great money. it could have been better but it was like a dream of mine to like since i was little i've wanted to be a dancer that's what i thought i was going to do my whole life my mom was a professional ballerina it was my absolute dream so i could not say no to that and looking back i was like that was one of the best three months of my life like and and there wasn't like it wasn't the right dollar amount but it like changed my life but i think to you your point like this is and i'm so glad you did that however that three months set us back six nine months easily Relationship, Sean went on a four-month tour after gymnastics, the year we got married,

and it was the worst thing. She loved every second of it. You're like with your friends, and every night it's like this, you're like on this high, but that's not always a good thing to be on a high. Like some days you just need to be freaking on the couch with Jason. You know what I'm saying? But I think it made me a better person and a happier person. Yeah.

So there's something to be said about that. I'm not trying to like degrade your decision. No, no. I'm just saying like it's it's such an interesting decision matrix where you're like freaking what is the right thing yeah yeah you're right stages right so like that's a stage that was amazing that like we were doing that but and that's awesome and I'm sure they're you know then I had an eight city book tour where you were home and that's you know eight cities not the same as three months but I think what also happens when you make those decisions it also creates a little

resentment right because I'm like okay now I got the dogs for three I mean it's only you got dogs you got playing around that you're taking care she's living at a high life so it creates it's like underlying resentment that when you get back in the same page then you've got to repair the time away repair like you know just the distance and different lifestyles and um that's just I would say too I'm similar to you like I loved it and in the moment like yes I learned so many different things and I had so much fun and all everything but I do know if I were to get offered it again, I would a million percent say absolutely not. It's not worth our relationship.

Yeah. No, I would just work it into everything where like Jason and I could have our own bus and we could do it together. Like that's, I would think of it now. Things are different where I 100% agree with you where it's like I did my thing solo, but now that we're so far into our relationship I see what it can do to our relationship and the negotiation factor

of just opportunities in general as it pertains to our family and our kids looks so different that we had an opportunity to come up a month or two ago where we were going to go across the world for over a month and I desperately wanted to do

it but we couldn't figure out the logistics for the kids and for us and so we ultimately said no because it just wasn't in a long run worth it what is it the amazing race no that would be so we're saying yes to that yeah i could totally see you guys doing that with kids yeah the agony of everything up to when you say no is like so it's like freak i don't want to say no i don't want to say no and then you say no and you're like oh yeah and then you have that time back and you're like grateful for it Yeah. Right? Yeah, 100%. You're looking at everyone. I'm like, right, guys? And I also think it becomes a yes, yes game too, right? So if maybe there was something I would have said no to or Caitlin would have said no to.

But then I said yes to something. It's like, oh, he's going to do that. I'm going to go do this, right? Like, you're in Canada? Like, great. I'm going to go find this opportunity and go over there. And then it becomes like a yes, yes thing. That is you to a T. I think it's both of us. Oh, that's us, too. That's you for sure. Yeah. We're very similar that way.

Yeah. Because you're so competitive. But I, I love downtime. Like, alone time, downtime, not doing anything for, like, days. I really, like, I need that to just be, like, better at everything that I'm doing, including relationships. I can't stand. Jason can't do it. If I go somewhere, he's like, oh, I'm going there, I'm going to go somewhere, too.

I can't sit still. I have to, like, like, I need to probably go see a doctor about that. You need to sit still sitting still is like one of the best things I've ever done for myself is just being still. Oh, I totally agree. It's like a very healthy thing to do. And I could do it like Sunday. Yeah. But then that's like it.

Like I got like Monday I can't. I'll be up at five. Like all right, let's go. No. Andrew randomly on Saturday was like, had a buddy text him saying he was going to run a marathon or a triathlon on Sunday. He's like, yeah. Oh, no. So he did it.

I crushed it. No way. And then after the triathlon, he's like, I think I'm going to get my pilots license. I'm going to go get it. That's how my brain works. It's literally, he's just always looking. He took my first lesson. He took his first lesson.

Wow. Do you have 2020 vision? Yes. Oh. Do you? Yeah, I do. Wait, isn't that a myth? I just feel like you.

I don't think you have to. Oh, I thought you had to be a pipe. I think it's colorblindness. Oh, maybe that's. Oh, yeah, that would be scary. That would, yeah. Okay. Okay.

So another, no, I have a question. I have a question. I have a brain. I'm like, okay, pilot. And this is a hard one to answer. Okay. So we might have, um, Community Bev time after this.

Okay. So you guys are saying that potentially your next milestone that you will work for is you're getting married. What's individually your biggest fear with marriage? I have a lot of fears because I come from a divorced family. And so I have like the fears of falling out of love, someone giving up. I have so many fears. I'm, yeah, I think my biggest fear in. a marriage wait are you asking like my fear of just in general with you guys okay yeah um probably that something more like because of the mindset and he can turn this back on me too because i have

the same mindset but him having the mindset of what's next what's better what's here um makes me think he could do that in a relationship like oh what else is out there and he could get very sick of me because that's you do that in a relationship i feel like you get so sick of me after like a long time in marriage that you'd be like well what else is out there and you'd start shopping that's my fear um i my biggest fear in getting married is the process of having kids and like not being on the same page in like a nightmare situation where not only your selfishness or disagreements are impacting one another in the health of the relationship while you're materially impacting, like, the development of a human that you created.

And, like, if you say, like, what's a nightmare situation? Like, I think, oh, and this happens all the time. But what I want to avoid at all costs is, like, having kids. And then there's, like, a divorce. And then ego's getting away. And then there's, like, the kids don't like your mother or father because of the way they've been, you know, manipulated or angled or something happened. Like, to me, that is just, like,

the ultimate nightmare scenario. And so that is like the nightmare scenario. But I think the overall fear is that you get married and what you thought was what it was ends up not being what it is after you've already looked at one another and committed the entirety of your life to that person. Like that is the ultimate fear. Yeah.

And you'll hear scenarios like I'll hear, and this is where like my solution oriented like trying to learn. Like, what happened at your game? You'll hear scenarios of, like, we got married and three years later, like, literally a switch went off. Like, I don't know who the person is anymore. And I'll be like, well, talk to me about the format. Like, were there red flags that might have indicated that? Was there a behavior that could have occurred that you could have seen that?

Like, how does a switch just go off three years after you're married? And to me, that's, like, the biggest concern. So let me try to make an analogy here. Because you guys are at this really awesome, but kind of terrifying point. where you're setting the foundation for what is the relationship going to be. It's not like, it doesn't just magically turn into something. Sure. You together make the relationship something.

And someone was talking about Pablo Picasso, I think, was approached. And like a lady saw him painting, like just briefly took a paintbrush and, like, painted something on a canvas. And then turned around and sold it for like $100,000. It took him like 30 seconds. sold it for $100,000. She was like, well, how can you do this in 30 seconds and make this much money? He was like, well, that 30 seconds took me 30 years, right? And like this idea of, let me make another analogy where it's like compounding interest, right?

Like with finances, sure. You have, you know, $100 and 7% return on year one, you have $107. And the next year you have like 7% on top of that 107. it's like the same principles applied to relationships where you're hoping you're hoping that when you have kids you guys will be on the same page yeah start doing the things that will make start doing the practices that will get you on the same page now like don't just sit on the couch and watch Netflix like get on the same page because things only will get more complicated and the unfortunate thing and I'm not envious of this with you two is like the opportunities

that you're presented with, as you've alluded to, are so extraordinary. Like, hosting a national TV show, prime time, not normal, right? Very hard to say no to. But, like, you're setting the practices now for what your relationship will be. So that was a little bit of a hot potch. I also think, too, we obviously don't have the answers because I feel like it's everybody's biggest fear. Yeah.

And you read books about it. and you read that like people change and like what if the person I marry isn't who the person's going to be in 20 years right but we all change and I think because you guys are already so hyper aware of it and hyper scared of it that you're like actively working on it and I think I probably cause a hundred percent more arguments than we would normally have because I'm so afraid of that happening yeah that's why I do that too every other day I'll be like I don't know you we haven't talked in two days what is happening are you're changing i didn't know you got your pilot's license like i like you're not talking to me and i will get so paranoid at the fact that we're growing apart that i will cause conflict in our marriage to make sure we get back on the same page and i think within our conversations

we try so hard and i think it honestly stemmed from that first year of marriage where we did grow so far apart from each other that it was kind of like we got to we got to make sure this isn't gonna happen again you got a little taste of what that yeah was i in moments of like frustration like the anger especially the more like emotion katelyn's showing the less i try to show to to bring the situation oh and that doesn't work well here i won't react i won't yell back i won't scream i will just and then i get louder and then and i think because i want something like i just give me something and i'm like i won't i won't do it and i think to your point like when you sometimes when you're communicating that conflict it's because the conflict makes you kind of step into pain and the pain

is what you need to get to the resolution or to be heard because I am emotional and I don't think that's a bad thing and Jason's very um rational and that's not a bad thing but he would like me to be more rational and I'd like him to be more emotional and in arguments that's where I want it to come out like I'm like holy how can you just sit there in silence and like think about work in this time when I'm like crying and like having a panic attack and you're like I will not respond I am a robot I think I took it on the hockey ref yesterday show him a lot of emotion God jealous of that ref yeah I out on me this I think you'll appreciate this and her posted something on like Instagram the other day likes he's going to laugh at this where he basically like

wrote three sentences of like I over did it this weekend that I didn't have enough energy for the kids and I needed whatever and I came over and I was like you did a really good job articulating your emotions to Instagram can you tell me this next time I said the exact same thing to her I said the exact same thing to her she just didn't freaking remember so I'm like Jason I always chirp him about him I'm like I don't get Instagram Jason like yeah I want I or no I don't want Instagram Jason. I want like real Jason in front of me like not sales pitching anything to me about like when we talk about weddings you're very much like all the price is just ridiculous and this is this is so not acceptable and blah and I'm like I just wanted to be like it doesn't matter I just

want to marry you and he's just so like am I on the same path that we're on did I go somewhere else in the conversation yeah no I'm liking this oh okay okay whoa I don't know what happened we're a coaxing You were on the perfect path. Everything you were saying was great. This is where my brain fights me, where I'm like, I thought we were on the same team. Yeah, I feel like that's where, like, I just want you to be like, well, the cost doesn't matter. I just love you. I can't wait to marry you.

I don't find those, like, dependent on one another. Like, yes, can't wait to get married. Let's plan a wedding. But then once we are planning a wedding, like, let's use our thought process. Foundering. Like, two different discussions. Yeah, I guess we don't have the first discussion. It's always like budget.

Hey, wait. This is, this hits so close to home, bro. Yeah. I think we're still talking about the wedding budget for this freaking day. She's like, you didn't, because I'm, it's the same situation across the board. Benjamin's getting married. He's like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like she's getting married.

Yeah, yeah. It's like. It's a joke. It's a joke. And the thing is, I don't like my blood boils when I or anybody I know is taking advantage of. That's what drives me with a lot of my stuff. It's the wedding industry. It is the wedding industry.

And that's what makes me nuts. But then, but Jason, I am so happy to, like, have the tiniest wedding in a backyard and, like, with our closest friends and family. He doesn't want that. And I'm so happy to do that. Like, if we're going to do it, let's do it right. Yeah, but then you don't have to spend the money.

I'll spend the money, but let you spend it right. There is no spending it right in a wedding. Yeah, there is. No. Yeah, you pick and choose. No, look at everyone here. You don't need everything. You just pick and choose, you know?

I will say I learned a lot of very, interesting like negotiating things when it came to a wedding because i'm very much so like jason in the sense of if we're going to do a wedding let's do a wedding but katelyn of like let's just spend the money like i which didn't work at all because i also took all of it like what had what was the problem though like what was okay what was your takeaway give us a take away oh wedding yeah i've got takeaways i learned a lot of crazy things all of the BS like you're supposed to do x y and z in a wedding don't do it and don't ever contact a wedding um they already have one no no not like a wedding um like if you go to a caterer don't tell them it's for a wedding just cater food

oh you said the word wedding it's five x absolutely and and that's smart same exact product and negotiate everything yeah because like we got quoted for a menu for an event and it was i don't remember how much per person and i was like this is too expensive i'm gonna go somewhere else i my budget is this yeah and they came back with the same exact menu they had just like changed out a couple of ingredients and they're like here yeah and it's just like it's all about negotiating they're really trying to make money and i think especially since it's your names people associate that with like success and so you have to be like no do you guys have a tangible budget like we're gonna a lot x amount no Andrew we still don't for the wedding

We do, but it's going to be more than that if you want the wedding that you want. It's not going to be more than that. Okay, then it's going to be smaller. We're not going to get the line. Okay. But you have talked about a tangible number. Well, I think that's a good place to start. Yeah, yeah.

And we had the bank account is dedicated to that. Yeah, that's why we started to join. I want to go into a different topic quick. We're going to keep them here for seven hours. This is our longest one so far. I love this. This is like a bottle of wine. last time.

Yeah, we did. I know. So I want to put the cart before the horse real quick. You guys have talked about kids and you both are of the mindset that you want kids. Okay, I don't want to assume that. One at a time, you guys can, whoever wants to go first. Down the road, you have babies. What qualities of each other do you hope to see in your kids?

Oh, that's great. definitely Jason's like loyalty is one but like your passion for being loyal like not just being loyal

his passion for being loyal like it's very important to him to like protect people that he cares about and I love that can I throw one thing in there? Yeah I think it's really cool that you said that

and just remember your biggest fear is that he won't be loyal I know I tell myself that all the time. I'm like, I'm going to drive him to not be loyal with my freaking fears over here. I know. Yeah, that's true. It's a good point.

I think Caitlin's that creativity and her ability to like just be a leader, like against what might be either like acceptable or deemed appropriate. Like you stick by your ways and you know your thoughts and you believe strong and you lead. And I think that would be. something that I was nice that's really nice thank you for bringing that out in us that's a cute question here's sometimes you can like get lost in the weeds I feel like and like oh freaking we're talking about the wedding we got this trip in New York and you don't actually step back yeah so let me just provide my third party perspective again we've known each other for three and a half years and we don't spend all day every day together but yeah I see like Jason

is your freaking biggest hype man you know like your biggest cheerleader and that's pretty awesome yeah and with you together i feel like it's a couple that i want to be friends with 20 years from now we love spending time with you guys um we want our babies three friends yes i know that's the dream we move close have babies family friends forever you also are capable of so much from a career standpoint and i think you're capable of like changing the world in a positive in a positive positive way don't get stressed out by that but like just like you I'm freaking rooting for you guys you know yeah I want I want this because you guys are great thank you and I do like the support and like the hype men and stuff I do feel like that has always been there but I don't

feel like that lately I feel like I I feel like we're trying to end up really positive Well, wait. You didn't let me finish. I think I might have something to do that because I feel like I've been so focused on, like, what I'm doing and blah, blah. And, like, I haven't been as big of a hype man, which has made you be like, well, then I'm not going to either. And I feel like we need to get back on, like, let's hype each other up. All right. That's what, that was my point.

Same team. I also think third-party perspective, never forget, you guys, we've said. this before we talked about and today the opportunities you guys get you guys are around so many extraordinary and not like extraordinary and like a good sense just like extraordinary things like you host a relationship show and you get to see things every single day that are not normal and that can make you very easily second guess everything that goes on within your home and I think just realizing that they are weird and like what what is at home is like true and good and everything else is fighting against that so that's a good point yeah

right gosh it's fun you should host a couples podcast yeah that thing over you should do it wait you should do a couple's book's book on it is it's so funny well because to bounce back jason being your biggest hype man the at the type of Jason that you bring out like the aspects that you when you're around that you highlight in him is so different because he is like a when we we had breakfast a day later day and it's like business business and it's like freaking great I love that yeah but also when you're around it's like you're just giggling more it's awesome it's good but that's good to hear I like that I like making him giggle anyway I didn't get a single smile the other day of breakfast and by the way

We had little PowerPoints out. I'll like smile. Tell me, good to see you. Wait, last question. Yeah, ask him the question. You and me too? Fine. Okay.

I want to pull this out from our first interview and actually compare to see if it's different. But three years in, what's the best piece of advice you've been given or would give about relationships? Probably what you just told us. pretty good um do you have something i i don't know if this is the best piece but i just asked this couple who got married in there sorry they've been married for like over 40 years amazing and they just had their anniversary so it's like like tell me as i said i don't want to hear like the fluffy you don't go to bed mad at each other like give me something real what is it that after four and they had four kids yeah two of them were two of them were twins and it was very unexpected

And they lived in this little city, this little apartment in New York City with four kids. Like she goes, I look back in my life with him and there were so many just like disaster, like so many disasters and how did we get through it and how did we even afford it? And the only thing she attributed to it to them, I really analyzed it. It was just an outrageous mutual respect for one another. We had respect for one another more than we had for anyone in our lives. And so while things were awful and when we couldn't afford, forward things we just had enough respect to know like they're going to get us through it we're

going to do this together and so she said I think it comes down to really just our respect throughout the entire 40 years that's really cool that kind of hit same kind of thing I can't believe I'm forgetting who said this it was literally two days ago maybe even yesterday someone was telling me this but they're like my partner is my best friend and I have to think about how I would talk to a best friend rather than how you can easily talk to your partner who's just like going to be there no matter what you have to think about how you would approach that situation to your best friend because at the end of the day

they are your best friend I like that too I love you guys I was glad to know you guys I really love you guys too I can do this all day I really could well now we'll bring you back when you get married and then you're like having kids and yeah I do love that question the best advice

Question before, what was the answer? I don't know. I can't remember either. Should we pull it up? Lexi's going to pull it up. Lexi's going to be like, let me pull it up. Yeah. I will say one of my favorite things about this show,

and this doesn't have to be on it. But kind of like you guys are saying, every single time we leave one of these interviews, we've gained so much wisdom from other people. Whether it's good or not, just like with what they've gone through, it's really, it's really cool to hear people's like, perspectives. Yeah. Yeah, I agree. I think that's part of why I enjoy podcasting, too, and probably you,

and probably you. Like, you just, when do you ever just sit down with people and have real honest conversations like this? Like, looking each other in the eyes and, like, actually talking and talking about real things. Like, it's so nice. There's nothing, like, my mind is not preoccupied with anything else. Yeah, but being in this moment. Yeah. So refreshing. Yeah. It's very, uh, you're able to just live in that moment of good conversation it's also interesting thinking about that we live in a world too where it's almost like topics can't be breached unless they're in a professional setting yeah sure like if you were to go on a dinner date with someone a lot of times you don't even get past the superficial stuff totally which is frustrated i hate yeah did you find it lex

oh yeah you didn't have long hair oh my gosh i just heard my like maniacal laugh i love that for you Oh my god Fabio I had a serious Wow you had a beard Dude I'll tell you what That couch is way more freaking comfortable back then This is terrible

I hate this guy I remember from that first episode The wine filled with tears And then yeah Friken hilarious Thank you guys Thank you guys Thank you guys for having us