Couple Things with Shawn and Andrew - 189 | Newlyweds Derek Hough and Hayley Erbert

Episode Date: November 8, 2023

Today we got to interview 3X Emmy Award Winner, 6X “Dancing With The Stars” Champion, New York Times Best Selling Author and our friend, Derek Hough, along with his beautiful wife, Hayley Erbert! After getting married a few months ago, Derek and Hayley are now on tour together for “A Symphony of Dance,” and we’re counting down the days until we get to see the show later this month! It still feels surreal that we get to call this incredible couple friends, I remember meeting Derek for the first time on “Dancing With the Stars” back in 2012 and I was so starstruck. We hope you love this episode as much as we love this couple! Love you guys! Shawn and Andrew  Follow My Instagram ▶ https://www.instagram.com/ShawnJohnson Follow My Tik Tok ▶ https://www.tiktok.com/@shawnjohnson Like the Facebook page! ▶ https://www.facebook.com/ShawnJohnson Follow Andrew’s Instagram ▶ https://www.instagram.com/AndrewDEast Andrew’s Tik Tok ▶ https://www.tiktok.com/@andrewdeast?lang=en Like the Facebook page! ▶ https://www.facebook.com/AndrewDEast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Is this Derek and Haley's first podcast you've done together? I think it might be actually. We did something like early on, like a little trial thing that we have. But we never shared anything. Yes, this is our first podcast together. What's up, everybody? Welcome back to a couple things. With Sean and Andrew.

A podcast all about couples. And the things they go through. I'm pumped for this. I know. We love this couple. Derek Huff and Haley Huff now. That's right. We love them.

They're in the middle of probably the wildest time of their life. They're newlyweds. They're in the middle of like a 45 city tour that you need to go see because it's incredible. It's actually coming to Nashville in a couple days. So if you're here in Nashville, come watch it. They are getting ready for a Disney special. Derek's one of the head judges on Dancing with Stars, flying back and forth between his shows. They were very busy.

It's wild. Here's what I didn't know about Derek. He's a three-time Emmy Award-winning artist and 13-time nominee. He's a New York Times bestseller with his book called Taking the Lead that he wrote a couple years ago. And we had the opportunity to go to Derek and Haley's wedding a couple months ago. And I haven't hung out with these too much, but I know that Derek has a special place in your heart. You guys obviously did Dancing Went to Stars together. Debateably should have won.

We should have. We don't really talk about that. but we do talk about several things in this episode that I really enjoyed, including comparing dancing with athletics and the physical demand that's required. We talked about ambition. We talked about marriage and how they're approaching it. A lot of discussion about death, oddly, in that. You'll listen and you'll find out what I mean by that, but in a good way.

Really? In a metaphorical way. I don't remember that. Okay. Yes, yes, yes. But one of the highlights of going to their wedding for me was when Haley's parents approached Sean and were just giggled to finally meet her because apparently they're big fans. And it was just as exciting to meet them. We have a lot of mutual friends with these two and we think that you will want to be friends with them as well.

So if you want to find out more about them, we'll link their socials down below as well as a website for you to check out their show called Dare Cuff Symphony of Dance. Did they say that right? Which again is 45 cities. it goes through December 30th. And Haley, his most beautiful wife ever, she is not only just like the kindest, most amazing person you'll ever meet in your life. She was on So You Think You Can Dance.

She is an amazing dancer. Went on to do Dancing with the Stars as a dancer. Now is one of like the headline dancers of Derek and Haley's tour. Another, she's also a choreographer. You can find her on social media everywhere. They're just geniuses together. and they just make you happy when you, like, talk to them. Honestly, just really honored to have these two join us,

because they are pretty hectic, and we hope you enjoy it. So without further ado, we bring you Derek Huff and Hayley Huff. Guys, we've only been trying to get you on the show for, like, four years, okay? I know. It's exclusive. The first thing I wanted to ask was, Sean, are you ready? How close are you? I'm huge. you guys

It's freaking huge Oh it's the cutest belly ever It's amazing It's amazing Sean keeps complaining about how hard things are But we just watch your day in the life real Oh my God That's a grind right there

That's the grind Yeah Yeah you know Traveling on places Way harder than You know Being breaking Than creating a life form

A life form I sound like such a nerd A nerd when I say life form A life form A life form Oh, I'm so excited. Wait, you guys are coming here really soon. November 8th.

Next week. Yeah, that's right. Next week. Nashville, baby. We're going to be Nashville, November 8th. We'll be there. We'll be there. Grand Ole Opry.

It's a, you know, iconic venue. But yeah, it's been a whirlwind. It's been nonstop. We've been, you know, just like, you know, I posted it, but it's, you know, we're on four flights and 24 hours. Two shows, dance with stars, rehearsals for this Disney special hosting and stuff. And, yeah, it's been a. It's been a lot. It's been a lot.

But it's great. It's really great. We love it. Yeah, it's been so much fun. And also, like, we take care of ourselves as much as we possibly can. Yeah. Like, we have an amazing physical therapist that has kept our bodies together. Call on the body wizard.

Body wizard. She literally has saved us. I just say, I've had a lot of physical therapist, but she is a couple things with her real fast. I just have to share. She makes these hilarious noises when she works with you. She's like, uh-huh, yeah, uh-huh. Uh-huh. Because she, like, is feeling your body, and she's like, oh, yeah, that's, that's it.

That's what it's supposed to feel like, and we're like, great. Or then she's just, like, sweating because she's working so hard. She's just sweating and dripping sweat on you, and you're kind of like, oh, God, but keep going. This is great. She's phenomenal. Yeah, that would. She works harder than us. She's the body wizard.

She really is. She's incredible. Yeah. It does seem like you guys put quite a bit of effort into taking care of yourself physically. I just watched your What You Eat in a Day video, which was probably from two years ago, but you did the lemon juice 15 minutes later you did the celery juice and you did the heavy metal anti-detox smoothie and then i saw did i see you get an iv in that in that day in the life video too love a good idea every tuesday after right at right after the show finishes on dance

from the stars right into my trailer the guy's waiting for me and i just he just why do you know just hydration um immunity boost my immune system you know all like the like glutathione muscle recovery, B12, all the, you know, all the stuff just to kind of, because especially traveling a lot as well, just to boost the immune system. Yeah, yeah. And it helps a lot. I have a hard time. Everyone goes on dancing with the stars or I hear dancers talk about how physically demanding dancing is. Honestly, I have a hard time comprehending that because as an athlete, it's like, okay, we're pushing weights and we're doing sprints and dancing just feeling. more subtly active, but can one of you explain the physical fitness required there?

Sean just shaking her head, though. It's way harder. Well, actually, I'll say this, which is kind of cool. So the thing is, what I love actually about Dancing with the Stars is how it has actually changed perspective of the athleticism of dance. And I think a big part of that is some of the athletes who come on the show where you have Super Bowl champions, World Series champions, hockey players. And they come on there, and they're gassing out doing a 30-second rumba.

You know what I mean? And so it's kind of been cool to see that because it just shows the athleticism of the dance. And one thing I loved about Kobe Bryant, actually, there's a video of him out there that's really beautiful. He's speaking at USC, and he had this Achilles tendon problem. He kept having this injury over, you know, seasons and seasons. and he eventually went to tap dance class. He took tap dance for a whole summer,

and he said it was the only thing that really strengthens Achilles. And then he went on a record, he said, I really believe that dancers are more athletes than we are. And I was like, can you say that again? But I think what it is, too, is it's different, because, for instance, when I'm dancing with Haley, if I'm doing like a tango, you know, there's a lot of body twists.

So imagine carrying, you know, like, you know, those balls, you know, when you work out with the... Med balls. Yeah. There you go. Yeah. You know those balls that you work out. You know, like, grabbing one of those, but it's a hundred and, it's a hundred and something plus pounds, and then you have to dance with it and carrying it. You have to lift it, and then you have to twist it, and then you have to put it under your legs and then you, for, you know, a minute straight.

And that, that, that, just that motion, that sort of four-dimensional motion is, um, is exhaust. You know what I'm saying? So it's not like powerlifting or certain things, but it's just the four-dimensional movements that is what it's exhausting. Because it's a small little twitch, you know, in sports, there's the twitch, you know, there's the jumps, there's the spins, there's so many different elements to it. So I think that it's just different. Because I think sometimes, too, as well, and if I go on a jog, I can run for, I don't know, for a while. I can run a couple, you know, five miles or something like that, because you can find a rhythm, you can find your breath, you can kind of steady yourself. But in dancing, it's like sometimes, like, you don't really get that opportunity to sort of like, you know, find your rhythm because you're constantly changing and it's, but I dance with stars, I get it because it's like, you know, you're the minute routine, but it's the rehearsals drilling it hour after hour after hour.

We call it being in dance shape because we could go to like an F-45 class every single day, the entire, the entire. higher week, and then we go into a rehearsal and we're still gassed. And we're like, why is that? Because you're using different muscles. It's a different endurance. It's just, it's hard to really explain. It's just different. But we call it being in dance shape.

There's a difference between being in shape and being in dance shape. But also, too, sorry, we keep talking. We're just going off. No, I love it. But also, it's like, it's funny because I'll do a show and it's like I'm at the peak of my, you know, performance. I feel strong. And then I'll just go play a pickup game of basketball,

and I can't walk the next day. You know what I mean? It's like, it's just because you're just using different muscles as well. So, but yeah. Wow. I will never forget dancing during the All-Star season. I was, that was brutal.

There's no way so hard. Excuse me? I'm sorry. No, I went from, I had just retired, so I was going for the Olympics. I was basically an Olympic shape. That is hard. It would be dripping sweat every day. Also, it's the repetition of it daily, right?

Like, when you're learning something, you're figuring, your body's figuring it out, so you have to drill it over and over and over and over and over again. And that's what's, like, exhausting. When you watch the dance on the show, I agree with you. Like, when you watch it and it's a minute and a half, you're like, oh, that doesn't look that hard. Like, that doesn't look exactly. It's the rehearsals of drilling it over again. That's the exhausting part, truly.

By the time you get to the show, you're just like, it's kind of like in like one of MMA, right? They're kind of like, hey, man, the fight is the, the fight is the fun part, you know? It's like the training is so difficult, so exhausting that by the time they get to the fight, they're just happy to be in the ring. Like, finally we get to actually do our thing. That's kind of how it is with dance, I suppose. Yeah.

That's good. You mentioned that. I think the only way to get you to really understand, Andrew, is to throw you in the fire. That's it. Where's going? I think we need to start getting you to dance. Let's get Andrew on the exact scene. He's a 33-3-3-80s.

I want a campaign for him to be on so bad. She just wants to blast me and make fun of me. That's Sean's sweet spot right there. I will be sitting front row the whole time. So excited. Derek, let me tell you something. I try to get Sean to dance more than I care to admit, and she will not do it. And she says she doesn't know how to dance.

Every time she would dance with you, you just pull her around the dance floor. Is that a thing? Did you let her dance? Like, is she a good dancer, Derek? She's a great dancer. I know. I can memorize choreography. okay i can't just like get out there and do it

you know i'm gonna i'm gonna be honest with you i feel you on that i'll be honest with you i'm i'm similar in the sense sometimes if i'm honest like you know people like oh derr you's dance get out there and dance and i'm like i'm not really the improviser kind of thing like i i'm like i like to know what i'm doing i like to give me some structure like yeah but these new like our dancers on this tour we're just like do something for eight two eights and they're just like genius just brilliant like movement And I'm like, yeah, yeah, I can't do that anymore. It's a different generation, you know, it's amazing.

I think the most intimidating dance floor I've ever seen in my entire life was your guys's wedding dance floor. Oh, my gosh, you ain't lying. I was like, I think I'm good. I think we'll just stand back and watch. There was a lot of dancing that night. Everybody was going to town. I loved that there were like little dance circles happening too.

It was like all of a sudden you just see like different. three different circles, and all of them were like full dancers just going hard. Yeah. Some were like head banging. Some were doing like an add-on, you know, dance game. Some are doing a limbo. Some we're doing like full partner dancing. Some we're doing, she was dancing that night.

Yeah, Mark Bales's mom, Shirley. She, I mean, she brought her Latin shoes. Let's just put it that way. She was ready to dance. She's like, oh, she's going to put my Latin shoes on. And she got out there and she was doing a full. competition performance with everybody and we were just like oh there she goes it was so fun so fun that was an epic day i'm curious from your perspective was there one moment that stuck out and if so

what was it oh one moment is so hard to pinpoint in a day full of things but i would say probably my like my most memorable and it was kind of my one of my first of the day too was walking down the aisle I don't remember anything that happened. I actually don't even remember seeing the scenery that was all. It was gorgeous, but I don't remember seeing any of it. I was like straight tunnel vision to Derek the entire time that I didn't hear anybody. I didn't. My mom was like, I said, breathe, honey.

And I was like, I literally did not hear that at all. I don't know why. I was just tunnel vision to him and just walked straight to him. That was a really, like a really special moment. Yeah, it was amazing. That was... With Amex Platinum, access to exclusive Amex pre-sale tickets

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slash Y Annex. Yeah, man, I don't know. It all was really special. I think... All of it was amazing. There was definitely one moment for sure. You know, her walking down the aisle And, you know, when you're outside, too, there's a few little bugs and stuff that that we were kind of, you know, we acknowledged that.

But it didn't bother us, honestly. We kind of knew that going in. We're like, we're kind of committing to the outdoor setting, and it's going to be the outdoors, you know. But seeing here walk down was really, just really, really special. There was a moment, I will say, people always ask, like, you know, does something ever go wrong? and there was one thing that the welcome party

the first day right before people showed up for the first day it's like you know here we go and I'm like you know what I'm gonna just we're on a cliff

on the ocean and this beautiful cabin and it's a little chilly nice and cozy the marine layer we've got the wood this like stone fireplace I'm like you know

I'm gonna light a little fire like this is going to be so romantic and beautiful and so I, and it's kind of gas, you know, you turn it all, but it's real fire, it's real wood, but you turn the gas and kind of get it going. So I turn the gas on and it just, it is on, it is a light. The thing is a flame. And I kind of walk out. It looks great. He was like, oh, this is totally fine. And he just like leaves the house. And I'm getting ready in the house. Like, full hair and makeup. All of a sudden I'm like, it's getting really smoky in here. And I turn around and the room is just full smoke. I don't know. I know if...

The flute wasn't open. Oh, no. Pump in, dude. There was a little gust and the pumping smoke in there. I sprinted into, because right next to that room where the fire was, where all of my dress is, and I was like, oh my gosh, my dresses are going to smell like smoke. It's going to be, like, they're going to get all smoky. I sprinted in there, closed the door, was opening all the windows.

Emma, my makeup artist and Jill, my hairstylist, were like trying to waft it out of the house. Oh, gosh. I eventually showed up. I kind of popped into the scene and I'm like oh no and then I grabbed the clamps

I grabbed the fiery logs and I'm like crazy's like fiery logs out of my gosh that's a great way to take a bad situation to make it worse it's a great way to light

that entire it was pretty terrible and you're just like little coals falling on the floor and stuff and then like our wedding party was coming and they were doing the same they were like grabbing sticks

to try to like lift them all the logs out it was it was a burden but it was definitely a moment and luckily that was just the first day and then it nothing else really happened after that well you didn't ask but i there's there's three moments that i distinctly remember from your wedding one is derrick's face watching derrick's face watching you walk down the aisle that's always one of my favorite that was just really special two is the first time i felt palisanto in my nostrils that was just freaking magic dude i'm addicted to it

i am addicted to it no so much so it it's become a massive argument in our household. Thank you very much, you guys. Because he keeps buying it and lighting it in our house. You light it in your house? Yeah. Which are you talking about? Palisanto or the Copal?

Like the big, the smoky stuff was coming. Oh, Palisota. Okay. Yes, we do it in our house. He's getting whatever is like really smoky that's supposed to be lit outdoors and he lights it in our house and then I come home and similar to you, our house is filled of smoke and our daughter's like, Why is it cloudy?

I love it. I'm like, oh, my gosh. I need more. But by the way, when you came up, I can't, I'll say something. So there's so many different parts of the wedding that we planned, so many different elements. And I'm like all about the experience and like, and smell is like a big thing for me. Yeah. So that was like a big item on my list was like, mix of the fresh copal being burnt every five minutes with like coals and like Palisanto.

So when you came over and you were like, dude, what is that smell? I love that. I can't tell you how I literally Made his day It made his life Because the two things that were important to him that day Were the music along the Along the path and the scent

And so you pointed out one of the things And he was like My life is made I was like Here's the thing Because I'm not a big smell guy Sean will tell you I can barely get this guy to wear deodor

Yeah I don't It doesn't do it for me But I smelled Palo Santo And I was like I need that I'm gonna Whatever Well yeah I don't even know We got to find the right one.

It was a mixture. It was a mixture of both of them. The Copal is the one that's supposed to be burned outside. So outside. But Palisanto, you actually can burn that in. A little bit. You just kind of dust the real. But you do a little bit.

No, he lights it on fire till it's like a blaze. And then I eat it. Sometimes I just eat it. But anyway, for those listening, apparently Palisanto is like a Peruvian tree that if you light it, it smells really good. And you won't regret trying it out. So anyway. But the third moment was the pyrotechnics when you guys did.

the dance and Haley did the and then Derek did the and I was like oh my gosh it's epic dude anyway sorry no no that was that was also another little Derek thing he was like we have to have the cold sparks we have to have them and I was like okay here we go

those were a few but so we did have I say what okay so for our first dance people often ask like was your first dance this like big choreographed you know crazy dance I'm like no but what we did and what we wanted to do was it was just two of us in the barn and everybody was outside of the big doors and then we kind of started the dance and the original idea was that we were going to have ground fog and the filled the whole room was going to be filled with ground fog so it looked like we were like just dancing on a cloud

you know and then the thing was open and then everybody would join us we had the ground fog there but we tested it out but it wasn't like laying it was just like going everywhere like like andrews palisanto and so we had to cut it but I was like so I was like oh no nothing real but I was like our wedding videos will be ruined because all of a sudden we'll just be in a cloud like an actual cloud and we'll be able to even see us I was like we can't have that yeah yeah it was awesome though I was going to ask I mean a deeper question after this but you guys are the most creative people I've ever met in my life the stuff you guys create together individually is true art and when you're creating this moment that is supposed to represent your guys's

life together how like how did you even begin creating your wedding moments because you could literally I mean I've seen you create the wildest things you could create anything I think I think the first thing was just the place where it was the nature nature was the first thing like, okay, that's the, that's the foundation of where we want to be, get married, and we want to celebrate. It just means a lot to us. And just some of the creatives and stuff like that, a lot of Pinterest, a lot of looking up stuff. A lot of inspiration. But this one right here, as far as just the execution, organization, like logistics, like laying it all out. I mean, she literally did that entire thing. It was masterful, you know, truly. Yeah.

Yeah, it was, it was, thank you, it was, um, you feel the pressure because you're like, this is literally a once in a lifetime thing. It has to be perfect. But then I was like, actually, it just has to be perfect for us. So I was like, what are the most important things that we want? We knew that we wanted it to be in nature. We knew we wanted it to be with the people that we loved most. We knew we wanted it to be intimate.

We were like, we don't want to have a massive wedding. We want to have just like the people that are really important to us. Um, and we just knew that we were like, okay, it has to be a, a great time. Like, so we had to have the dance party. We had to have lots. The live band was, that was fun. The live band was actually, that was kind of a, we were on the fence at first, because you never know with a band.

You're like, they might be, ooh. Sometimes they feel like, rah, rah, la, la. You're like, oh, no. You were like, I don't know, but. They were great. But we were like, yeah, let's have them. And they were phenomenal. We loved them so much.

Good old time. But yeah, it was honestly really fun to plan that because I was like, this is something that we're going to have for the rest of our lives as a memory and on video and photos. And it was perfect. It was fine. I was kind of planning the tour creatively. And then she was planning the wedding. Kind of like, we were kind of going like.

Simultaneously. Simultaneously doing that. But yeah, I wasn't part of it a lot more than I've heard from in the past, like, you know, dudes. I had to just keep being like, okay, what's actually important to you? Like, what do you want? How do you sound toe? I can't have him. That's it.

It's my one requirement. And that was what was important to him. Andrew's one requirement for our wedding, I still remember this. You could have cared less about anything. You're like, you go do you. He's like, but I have to have string lights. I love good string lights. What?

Random, but okay. Really gets the vibe. Hey, by the way, it's funny. We were just talking about that day of the day. I think we were in Chicago and we're just walking through the city

and we're just like okay and then all of a sudden you see like the street with string lights we're like oh let's go down there let's go down there

like it's just something like oh it must be a good restaurant yeah it must be an amazing place if I had string lights yeah yeah it's something like so like

warm and welcoming and romantic about it you know and it's just like some like $30 string lights you know and you're like

it must be a great restaurant where'd you guys do your honeymoon we did it in Italy amazing we did it We were all over. Were you able to fully enjoy it while also getting ready for the tour?

Do you feel like you had to rain it in a little bit? No, I think we did. We were able to kind of switch it off a little bit, you know. You know, yeah, just kind of enjoy the moment. Can I carry the excitement from the wedding into the honeymoon? I think knowing that we were about to go on tour too really made it like, okay, we have to be present during these two weeks because we're about to go on a crazy adventure, which is amazing, but we have to, like, ride the high of the wedding right now.

And it was, yeah, it wasn't actually that bad. When we were in Rome for a day, and she met, we were at the, uh, the Treby Fountain. Oh. And she goes, babe, this is where, what's her day? Lizzie McGuire. This is where Lizzie McGuire. Yes. And I was like, what are you, what are you talking about?

And so on our honeymoon, in a hotel room, we watched Lizzie, Moosey McGuire movie. Yes. And he was, he was like, thank you. This is not... What am I watching right now? This is not great. Shockingly bad when you go back to watch the movies? It actually was...

It was so funny. I was laughing, like, gutterly, like, laughing. I was like, this can't be real. It was pretty funny. Watch that, and then immediately after watch Gladiator. So... Wow. Two very different movies.

But it was really magical. The only thing I would say that the last three days, I got, like, sick, you know, of course. But we stayed, the last place we went to was Matera, which is this ancient city where basically our room was a cave. We stayed in a cave. It was really, really cool because the city is 10,000 years old. It's the third oldest city in the world.

In the world. And it's the number one oldest city that's been continuously lived in. So from, like, caveman, like literally caves to, like. like bronze and the whole thing all the way to up to now it's been like populated so it's the number one

oldest city that's been continuously populated in a world it was stunning pretty cool really cool I'm curious you guys met in 2014 or started like dating in 2014

yeah we started dating in 2015 but we met in 2014 okay so you guys have been together a long time yeah you guys have overcome a lot of obstacles and just like a lot of time together why get married why now good question it's a good question

thank you it's a good question for me why did you decide now you know that's a good question I think um to be complete honest with you I think that for me I've always had a kind of honestly a negative association with marriage to be honest with you I think that um you know most of the important people in my life, you know, my, my mom and dad, they got divorced, you know, parents that live with in England, they got divorced. My sister, like, just so much divorce in my life, I think, that I never really, um, it for me was just like, what's, what's the point, you know, like, I'm good, like, maybe it's not something for me. Um, and then honestly, too, then over time, when we started dating, we started surrounding ourselves with couples, with

people who were married and had great relationships and they're just great examples of of marriage essentially which was really I think just a good um just good to be around you know um I think also too with us I think our relationship it was interesting when we first met it was our really we've had our version of our relationship we've had like 10 different versions of our relationship so many versions and um And I think, and we went through so many, you know, in our vows, we talked about it. We walked through fire together. We really have.

We've been through some insane obstacles, insane moments that would usually crush and destroy couples. And, but we came, we would always come back. And, you know, there's been times when our relationship ended. And there'd be times when our relationship was over. and it was dead, you know, and I mean that in a beautiful way because... It was that version of the relationship that needed to die, you know what I mean? It was almost like, this relationship is over, but now it's let's start this new one. Like, this is, you know what I mean?

So it was almost like, it wasn't like it's over and then we're gone. It's like, it's over, but that was like almost like a freeing and a beautiful feeling because it was like, now let's begin this, this new, you know, chapter, this new version of who we are together. We actually heard a quote by Esther Perel and she said, you can have multiple relationships with multiple people or you can have multiple relationships with the same person. And we were like, we felt so seen and heard because we were like, that's literally what has happened throughout the entire time that we've been together.

It's like we've had so many different relationships with each other. And it's really beautiful because each one is better than the last. And also I think it just showed us, And it basically reaffirmed from me, like, okay, we're going to change. We're both going to change. We're both going to evolve. We're both going to grow as we go together. And there's that great song by Ben Platt.

It was called Grow As You Go. So good. And that's kind of part of the symbolism of us getting married and having dinner in the garden. It was the idea of growth, the idea of, you know, things in nature are not straight lines. They're not, you know, clean. It's tangled, it's crazy, it's messy, it's this and that, but it's so beautiful. And so once I felt like, to answer your question, once I kind of felt like a new, oh, we can get through anything, we can go through anything. But I feel confident that we're going to change and grow together.

Then I was like, I'm fully committing to this, you know, and to us. So, yeah. That was a beautiful description. and I love the concept of something dying. And I think what gets me so excited about marriage is I truly believe that it's the best tool for, like, self-improvement that you can have. You know, we live in an age, and it seems like you guys are in on this too. I love it. It's like taking an ice bath and you get energy or, you know, you take a mastermind, you're part of a mastermind and you get good ideas and good connections.

but like there's nothing like the self edification that marriage can create and something will die I think what's unique about marriage is instead of killing the relationship and like keeping yourself constant it becomes killing some version of yourself and the relationship stays constant which is so incredibly powerful it's super challenging and I know you guys are you've been together for eight years but marriage is just starting you'll have kids and like there's always this constant death that's kind of happening and it's like oh my gosh the person that I was before marrying Sean is so drastically different I'm thankful for that because that means that marriage is working it's like this feedback mechanism that like is so refining and it's powerful so I'm excited

for you well and I'm really glad you answered it that way because it's actually something we talked about at your wedding when we like left the welcome ceremony and I just said It was so powerful to be surrounded by so many amazing people who are so close to you in your life, but who have all gone through divorce and seeing you guys stand up there willingly and so beautifully wanting to take on marriage. It just made us so excited for you and so excited for like our marriage. Because in a world that I feel like really preaches that commitment doesn't work, it does and it can. I just, I thought it was amazing to watch. Yeah, but that hurt, though.

I mean, it hurts. You know what I'm saying? Oh, shut it. It hurts. But, yeah, yeah. Well, thank you guys for that. And honestly, one of the best things that came from our wedding was all of the people that were in relationships or maybe even weren't in relationships.

But the people that were in relationships, they were like, your vows just made us want to go renew our vows. Or, like, the way that you guys looked at each other just made us be like, I want to be closer. Like, it inspired people there. And that was really special to hear from the people that we love the most. We were like, wow, the fact that our relationship can inspire anybody was so beautiful to both of us. We were like, that was so special.

I think part of that was just, again, we've been together for so long, you know what I mean? And again, I've been through so many different things. And it was just this assurance of like, hey, man, we've gone through some stuff. Like, you know, and, hey, we can, we can not just get through, but we can thrive. You know, we can thrive together and really, you know, that's what's so beautiful about relationship in general is it amplifies everything. Yeah. It just turns the, it turns the volume up, you know, when you experience something, I remember going to Hawaii by myself and I was like, you know, in helicopters doing fun stuff and it was cool, but it was like, you know, it was cool, but it was by myself, you know. And then I went back to Hawaii with Haley and I did all the same things.

And it was just like so much better, you know, it just amplifies the whole experience. And that's kind of what it is really to have a partner or I even, I sometimes like even hate saying the word partner. It's too like partner, you know. But to have that relationship, it just amplifies a whole life experience. So yeah, it's pretty great. So. Not without challenges, though, I'm sure. Yeah, yeah.

Get ready. But like you said, it just makes your, get ready. It makes the appreciation though so much better when you get through like a hard time and you come through it. You look at your spouse so differently. It's like, man, I would kill for you. Like this is, it's really cool. So you guys are in the middle of, at the moment, what looks like an impossible feat to me. You're doing like multiple shows, dancing with the stars.

your tour getting ready for a Disney special on top of probably more things um how do you manage to do that and protect your relationship because you guys are basically co-partners in your shows you're working in business you're also newlyweds you're also just like everything how do you like what boundaries are in place or what's your routine to make sure things stay good yeah that's good. That's a great, great question. I think that part of it, I think part of it, one, is realizing that this type of situation right now, sorry. It's okay. This type of situation right now is, it's so temporary, you know what I mean? And it's, it's in a time when, you know, we're capable, we can do this. You know, we have the energy. We have the, like, you know, we're

out there doing it. And so it's kind of like, all right, we're going to put our heads down and we're just going to go for it and make sure that we are, we're strong. we're healthy we have this gift you know this privilege to be able to perform in front of thousands of people each night and to do what we love and uh but there's but for me it's like the stolen moments the little moments the little like just going over it's just saying hey babe how are you doing today like how you know just like little things that like for me stack up um because there is there to be completely honest to be like we have a day off today so we'll go for a walk go just enjoy being outside, hold hands.

And that was one of the things that I fell in love with with Haley in the first place was that I even said it in my vows. I always feel like I had to entertain and perform for somebody like, hey, hey, hey, hey, like, you know. And what I realized with Haley was like, we could just walk together in a park and hold hands. And we felt connected and we felt at peace and content. And so it's just those quiet moments and those little moments throughout the day, you know, it's not the, for me it's not so much the big. gestures, it's the small little glances, you know what I mean? It's like the look, you know,

just in a moment, just kind of like a little look and a little twinkle on the eye. And like that for me is like enough enough of a moment to like get me through an entire week. You know what I mean? Really. And yeah, what about you, babe? And sharing the stage, it's really interesting because at first I was like, oh, it's just going to be like a job for us. It's really been amazing to watch. Like, I'll be off stage and I'll be watching him. And he's either talking or he's dancing.

And I just, like, look at him and I'm like, that's my husband. Like, that's crazy. That's so crazy. So it is those little moments. And sharing the stage has been so much fun. And it's like, it's very, very rare for you to do this with the person that you love. We did so many tours that were separate. And we were constantly traveling, constantly crossing our schedules.

Like, it was never lined up. And now we get to do it together, which is so amazing and rare. There was a time, though. I will say there was a nice little moment that we had, you know, several shows ago. And what happened was she came off the stage. She just kind of, she seemed a little upset. I was like, are you okay, honey? She goes, well, I just feel like, I feel like I'm,

I'm not, I can't remember what you said, but she just feels like, I feel like there's always something wrong or something. And what happened was I realized that, and it was a good moment. We sat and chat for like three hours after, you know, the show in our dressing room. Maybe it was not that long, but it was a long time. Just too. Close to that. But it was, but basically what it was, I had to reflect a little bit because what I realized what started happening was that I'm such a perfectionist. or, you know, I just always want the show to be the best it possibly can be.

So we dance through there a lot. So whenever we came off, I'd always be like, oh, we need to work on that part. Oh, that part was a little off balance for us. Oh, this turn was a lot of. And I just started pointing out all the things that went wrong in that show. And because I was just wanted to make sure that we addressed this, so we could work on for the next day. And what I realized is that I was just doing that every day.

So all I was doing was just putting focus on all the things that went wrong in the show. when really so much went right so much it was so so many things improved so much things got better so many things were like fantastic but I was only addressing the things that were wrong because I wanted to improve them and what ended up happening was it just it just started feeling like it was just like

constant critiquing or constant you know and it was a moment where I kind of she kind of brought that up and I was like you're absolutely right you know and I need to be more conscious and more aware of focusing on the good things that went right in that show because there's so many, you know. But we sometimes, it's kind of a, you know, it's a reflection in life a little bit. Sometimes we just don't celebrate the little moments and the celebrations and the triumphs because we just kind of expect them that's how it should be. And we just point out all the wrong things, you know what I mean?

And it was a good moment to be like, hey, so even like during the show, you know, when something feels good, I'm like, yeah. And we're like talking to each other on stage and we're like, finding out all the good now. We're like, oh, that's, you know, that, oh, that feels so good. You know, we're having full conversations and stuff. And it was a great moment, you know, to catch where, you know, whatever you focus on is what you feel, where our focus goes, our energy flows. And so just to focus more on all the good that was going on, because I said this before,

but like, what's bad is always available, but so is what's good. And it depends. It's all dependent on what we focus on. And, yeah, it was a nice moment we had. It was nice. I will say there was something kind of funny is our recovery after the show, we have, like, a little room in the back of the bus.

And we have the big Norma Tech, like, inflatable compression pants. And then we have the STEM machine that's, like, making us Twitch. And we'll be watching, like, a movie that's got, like, this really steamy scene or whatever. meanwhile we're laying in bed with the big compression pants and like twitching and we're like bet this is married left this is really hot super sexy it's been great it's uh so when sean gets stopped on the street people ask her about gymnastics people ask her about celebrity apprentice and they ask her about dancing with the stars and so we started having conversations about it but one thing she always would bring up is

this this incredible brain you have derrick that can create things like she's never seen. And I guess I'm sharing this because I've been blessed to not have that genius that you have. But I can't imagine, I can't imagine, like, because it's the same, you know, your greatest asset can also be the greatest kind of ailment, if you will. And like that just vision for perfection that you have

that has made you build and grow all of these amazing sets. and tours and all these things. I just love your self-awareness around that because it can, you know, in this romantic relationship, kind of come back to bite you. So kudos to you. Yeah, man.

Well, also, too, is realizing, too, that, like, perfectionism is the lowest standard you could have because it doesn't exist. And so you're just living in constant disappointment. You know what I mean? You're never going to be satisfied. And by the way, I'm sure we can, I'm sure we've all experienced that.

where part of it is good because you keep striving to be better and to grow, but you never celebrate the good. You just like, it can be better, it can be better. You're never like acknowledging, oh, that was better. And that did get better. There was growth. And, yeah, so, and that's like, it's old behavior. It's like old, you know, I call it my old ballroom dancer behavior when I used to compete

because it was just like, no, it must be better. And I even said that, I said, I just, I fall back into some of that old, like ballroom dancer, competitor, you know, conditioning and have to remind myself, hey, I'm okay. I'm, you know, we're, it's not that. We're good. But yeah. I'm curious, how have you guys built what you have?

Because one thing that became apparent as I was talking with people at your wedding is that doing dance tours was not a thing before Derek and Haley started doing it. So how have you done this? You know, like what's been your strategy? What's gone right? What's, you know, kind of lucked out? And you're performing in front of thousands of people every night. Dancing with the stars, I feel like was the only media love that dance got.

But beyond that, like, you know, people do music tours. It started in 2014 with Derek and Julianne. They created, like, they created the first, like, dancing tour. four dancers, strictly for dancers. Were they sing and they kind of like talk to people? And listen, there was, so you think you dance had a good tour and like she even went 2013 did that. And Danceman starts had an arena tour actually where we did arenas and stuff, which was crazy.

And then like 2008 hit and there was no tour for like five years. It was kind of a time. And long story short, you know, we just did some charity events. And they were like, sellouts. I was like, wait a minute, people are showing up to these things, and we're not even doing anything special. So that first tour, we had to ask favors. I would try to convince people.

I think people would want to come see this. And I fought for it, you know. And then eventually we did it. It was a big success, and it opened up a door for more shows to kind of go out on the road and do things. And, yeah, but the thing that I, for me, that I rely on the most, is energy. It's, that's it, really.

Like, you know, when you come see the show, and then I have to say, of all the tours I've done, this one I feel probably most proud of, just because I spent so much time on the music, building the music, the soundtrack, like really working hard on that. And the choreography, you know, has amazing, you know, choreographers.

Tessonja Chavez really spearheaded the whole project, headed the whole project and she was just incredible, pushed us to the point where I was like, this is too hard to Sandra. She's like, no, you can do it, Derek. But for me, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's just another thing too is changing the intention of, I want to, before being a competitor was about me, right? About I want to be like, look at me and like, I want to be the best and like, it's about me, me, me, me. And then changing that intention, actually, it's about, funny. It happened with Sean Johnson. It happened with you, Sean. Sorry, sorry, sorry. I said your full name. I said I weren't here. I talked about you like as if you were in here.

It was actually that season before, um, before we came on. And I remember it, I was kind of in a way, kind of just selfish, really. It was like, I was really dancing. I was really helping my partners, doing, you know, working with them. But it was really kind of like, secretly kind of like wanting to like show what I can do. You know what I mean? And then when I danced with you, there was a shift in me, and I actually talked about this, there was a shift in my entire intention where I was fully there to, like, serve you, to serve your experience, to serve, like, that. And that's what I started, like, the choreography got better, the creativity got better. The everything just, like, for me, at least in that moment, that was a big shift in my dance with my dance with my dance with your career was when I danced with you. Like, everything just, like, opened up because I wasn't thinking about myself. I was thinking about how can I serve you and, like, amplify this experience the most best possible.

And everything just elevated from there. And that's how what these tours are is, like, how do we serve this audience? How do we give our energy to this audience? And people say, how do you do it? How do you have the energy? I'm like, that's why. Because if I'm doing it for us, there's only so much energy you can have for that. It's kind of, it's not sustainable.

But when you're serving, when your intention is that I'm going to have to serve, it's like an endless well of energy that's, you know, even if you're exhausted, it's like, pooh, you just, you can tap into something really special. Yeah. That's really good. Even the performances that we've done on, like, television and the performances we've done on social media or whatever it is have kind of been our, essentially it's like our album of content that we're like, oh, this is the kind of stuff that you will be. get to see on tour. We actually, I think, only do one of the ones that we've ever done on TV, but it's like that helps a lot to create the show because you're like, oh yeah, we have all of these numbers. Let's like kind of piece them together and create a show with things that like you loved or that was Emmy Award winning and all that stuff. So it really is like

an album of dance that we kind of create to put out on the road. What are you guys most excited about right now? Most excited about right now? Right now. I'm excited to go have a day where I'm not on a plane. I'm going to go walk around outside. But I think of that, but by the way, truly, that's literally what I'm excited about. Like, I think I'm, I try to keep my thoughts one day at a time, really,

because if I think about everything that's happening, I'll get overwhelmed and you just be like, ah. But I'm actually really excited about the next chapter in our lives. I'm excited. I'm excited to be a dad. You know? Oh, shit. No, geez.

Not yet, not yet. Not yet. But I'm excited about it. I think it's, you know, I think at this point, I think part of me is, it's weird. I think even since a kid, I was always been like, you know, I'm going to work really hard now, and then I'll party later. You know what I mean?

And it's almost like, I feel like I've done a lot now, and I feel like just like, okay, I'm excited to like for the next, you know, the next chapter. Yeah. Yeah. Our tour goes until the new year. We finish our final show is December 30th. So I think that's what I'm really excited for is to continue on with this show until the new year comes. And then it's like, like he said, new chapter, new opportunities, new year, new everything. Like, we have kind of blank slate.

So much to look forward to in the new year without even having anything really planned. So I think that's what I'm most excited about. It's a new year. Nothing planned for 2024? I mean, there's things. There's things. There's things. But nothing like concrete right now.

Yeah, nothing major, right now at least. I guarantee in the next couple of months it's just going to start, it's going to start wrap up. September next year, there might just be like a big announcement or something. Maybe. Maybe. I know. I was like, honestly, if it weren't for this tour, I'd be like, let's just whatever. Whatever can happen, let's start trying.

But I'm like, there's no way I can get pregnant on this tour. I would be dead on stage. By the way, have you seen that trend, Sean, where like somebody's pregnant? And they like, they like belly bump. And then the other person is pregnant And then the other person is like trying to like And in there was a stitch where it was like Somebody's just like running away from them

I was like that's me Oh gosh Do not will that in there Wait are you in existence Oh my gosh so you and BC are kind of close Okay wow That's funny Yeah

I know the pictures from the wedding of you guys Were so fun I love seeing the little prego bellies Oh my gosh It was so fun I'm curious How do you guys approach ambition because as a couple, it seems like there's a million opportunities that come your way.

There's a million opportunities that you could create. You know, you could sell out another tour in 2024. How do you, like, put boundaries around your ambition and the possibilities, you know? I think, yeah, I'm definitely very ambitious for sure. I think, you know, just with so many different things, I guess. but yeah, I don't know. I think it's a good question, actually. That's a good question.

I'm trying to think about that. Yeah, I think timing is important, of course, with certain things. But, like, part of me, I guess, is that there's a bit of a scarcity that I feel sometimes being a dancer, I suppose, that was always drilled in me. Like, you know, I guess like any athlete or whatever, it's like, you have, you know, your dance career is over at 25 or something like that. You know what I mean? That's like, and so for me, I'm kind of like. Like, I'm trying to squeeze, squeeze out my, you know, as much as I can as I can physically. But while, you know, prepping for things in the future where I can start, like, directing more or choreographing or whatever it is, but there's that scarcity that keeps me ambitious, I suppose.

You know what I mean? Where I feel like there's a finite time that I want to try to get as much done as possible. but to balance it with, you know, new things in the future, like, especially, like, you know, a family, like, I don't know, I don't know. Yeah, that's what I was going to say was, I'm like, I don't think we've ever really had many boundaries around ambition right now, but I know coming up in this next chapter, I think we'll still be extremely ambitious, but there will be other things to consider. So it's like, will it affect us as a family, us as a couple, whatever it is. And those are just conversations that we're going to have to have and we'll have to decide together as husband and wife. Actually, a great one right now is there's an opportunity to do something in New York, but it would require us to live there for a year. And it would be something that where I would be extremely busy.

And that's, you know, you have the agents that they're all like, hey, this is, you guys. I do this and I'm like, and I'm like, hold on, guys, I'm in a different part of my life now. Like, I can't just be like, cool. It's like, I've got to talk to my wife, you know, and I got to see, like, what does that mean for us, you know what makes sense? You know, are we going to be happy? Is she going to be happy? You know, because if she's not going to be happy, then I'm not going to, you know, I'm not going

to do that. So, so it's those are due conversations that even like my team have to learn. They have to understand, you know, it's like, oh, by the way, can't just do that anymore. there's more things to consider now. I'm so excited. It's hard when you're at the fork in the road and you got like the dollar signs right there in front of you or that new thing that you dreamed of forever.

And it's in some ways so much more tangible than like your marriage or your wife who, oh yeah, she'll be here today and tomorrow. But then, you know, that can compound over time. And then if you make too many decisions based off that immediate, tangible thing, then it comes at a cost. So I'm a big fan. of your guys is gosh dang it

I'm not done yet I have one more question because one thing that I learned we talked to Mark and we love you guys so much and we're so excited no we don't I'm getting text from Sue my door they're done they're done

we love you guys we love you guys it's fine now Sean shut me down for the sake this is one of those This is one of those decisions I was just talking about. Yes. Derek has something at one. Okay.

We love you guys. We're excited to see you in Nashville. We'll link everything down below. I'm just so excited for you guys. You guys are crushing it. you guys go together and you're just like you're just like you're just joyful fun um thank you thank you to be used a lot of you can't get enough to get to that's period and that's it would be very personal but even that just you're seeing at all so much thank you for

you glad to have you's friends all right for those listening that want to check out tickets or get for Symphony of Dance by Derek and Haley. We'll link that down below. But thank you so much and we'll be in touch.