Couple Things with Shawn and Andrew - 207 | wonderfully challenging marriage with daryl ann and daniel denner

Episode Date: March 20, 2024

This episode is sponsored by AG1! ▶ Try AG1 and get a FREE 1-year supply of Vitamin D3+K2 AND 5 free AG1 Travel Packs with your first purchase exclusively at https://www.drinkAG1.com/COUPLETHINGS. Today we sat down with social media sensation and our friend, Daryl-Ann Denner and her husband, Daniel, to talk about what’s been happening in their lives. Daryl-Ann is currently pregnant with baby #3 and we loved hearing about what’s been working for their relationship and what they’ve been struggling with. We touched on everything from wanting a large family and adoption to learning when to say no and how to prioritize your marriage. We love the direction this conversation went and we always love when we can have honest and vulnerable conversations with our guests. We’re grateful to have friends in similar seasons of life as us because let’s be honest, the struggle is real with toddlers and some days your marriage unintentionally takes a back seat. We hope you relate to this episode!  Love you guys! Shawn and Andrew  Follow the Couple Things Instagram ▶ https://www.instagram.com/couplethingspod/?hl=en Follow My Instagram ▶ https://www.instagram.com/ShawnJohnson Follow My Tik Tok ▶ https://www.tiktok.com/@shawnjohnson Shop My LTK Page ▶ https://www.shopltk.com/explore/shawnjohnson  Like the Facebook page! ▶ https://www.facebook.com/ShawnJohnson Follow Andrew’s Instagram ▶ https://www.instagram.com/AndrewDEast Andrew’s Tik Tok ▶ https://www.tiktok.com/@andrewdeast?lang=en Like the Facebook page! ▶ https://www.facebook.com/AndrewDEast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This episode is brought to you by Defender. With a towing capacity of 3,500 kilograms and a waiting depth of 900 millimeters, the Defender 110 pushes what's possible. Learn more at landrover.ca. What's up, everybody? Welcome back to Couple Things with Sean and Andrew. A podcast all about couples. And the things they go through.

Today we have Daryl Ann Dinner and her husband, Daniel. That's right. This is our second time hanging out with them. And boy, did I enjoy it. I loved this. I loved this conversation. All I'm saying is I laughed. I learned. I thought. I thought some ideas and thought some thoughts. That doesn't happen often. They are amazing. Absolutely amazing. Honestly, I feel like in some ways they're the internet's best kept secret. For sure. She is amazing on social media. And the content she puts out will get like, I think she got two million comments. one of her Instagram posts, which is ridiculous. So highly engaged fan base for those that like her. But beneath that, beneath the business, beneath the influencer side, is a mom and a dad and a

husband and a wife that have so much wisdom, are so protective of their family, truly think through everything that they're doing, and just like are so relatable. Yeah, pretty good stuff. So let us know what you think. Thank you, Darylian, and Daniel for joining us. This was their first couple's interview. You should do more, guys. You should do more.

Yeah, Daniel crushed. He did. If you want to learn more about these two, we'll link information down below. You want to share about what happened this week? Yeah. What happened in our lives this week? We almost got, you might have got in concussion today. You might have lost your balls today.

It's a weird combo to share. We're back doing challenge videos Yeah Sean and I'll do some weird physical challenge That we find on the internet Didn't end well Honestly we looked at this video We thought that'll be the easiest challenge

We've ever done We've, I think we've done this before And it went horribly wrong It did So we're just not recovering That happened approximately 30 minutes ago Oh what did happen this week Jet and Drew

had their first ice skating lesson Oh, my gosh. And they loved it. They have talked about ice skating more in the past seven days than any other topic ever. Jet was a bruiser. He went in and was like trying to sprint on the ice. He was running. Obviously, you can't really do that, but.

He figured it out. He did it. He did all right. It was a good time. Anyway, excited to hear what you think of this episode. Thank you, Darren and Daniel for joining us. If you want to find out about their company, Nudes, too, will include information. But without further ado, we bring you Daryl Ann and Daniel Dinner.

I couldn't find any interviews of you both. Have you done one together? Oh, this is our first one. Yes. Okay, he refuses to, like, do them. I just sit back. I sit back behind. And he's like, I'm not good. I guarantee you you'll get better out of him than out of me.

But, like, he refuses to do them. Why? I don't know. I just, I like to just sit behind the scenes, but I like you guys. Wow. We're the first person he said, yes, too. Oh, my gosh. You're kind of persuasive.

Well, what? Was it almost a year ago we met in Chicago? Do you remember the craziness that was happening? So there's that smoke storm up there? Oh, my gosh. I completely forgot about that. And then it was us and the president was up there. We couldn't fit him in our schedule.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But while we were there, he was there. We went to the same place he gave a speech. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. I don't want to. Yeah, he reached out.

We said kindly pass for right now. Yeah. Sorry, can't. And then now we're here. Sean and I have traded places. She was pregnant then. I was gonna say I have a, like almost no memory of this, but I'm guessing I was pregnant.

You were like 25 weeks pregnant, I want to say. But you hadn't told anybody yet. Well, you hadn't like told the world yet. Yeah, not anybody. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. You told the world quick, dude. That's how I do it. I like, I'll take a test.

Okay, I found out. Like, she almost held Instagram before she told me. I started filming in Target because we, okay, okay, I'll tell us sorry. So we were in Target. doing Operation Christmas Child, do you know what that is? And we take our kids to do it, whatever. So it was me, my mom, my sister, and my kids and her kids.

And so we're, like, filling the boxes. And then I'm like, I've got to get one more thing. And I'm, like, filming because I was filming the stuff. Like, I film everything, whatever. And I was like, I think I told Rhett, I was like, I think I have a baby in my tummy. And my mom was like, you're going to post this right now? And I was like, no, I'm going to wait like 12 hours and I'll post it in the morning. But she was like, yeah, we did it right then and there in the Target bathroom.

Was that the first time you had told your mom and your sister, too? Yeah. What was their response? They were shocked, but not, shocked, but not, like, surprised that that was how I would do it. It was just, like, the first time we told our family that we were pregnant with Rhett, we were at lunch, and Daniel just goes, yeah, Daryline's pregnant. We just pop it up, just drop it off. It's like, they're like, wait, what?

Like, we kept on the conversation. There's no, like, formal reveal. There's no. It's just like, oh, yep, there it is. Andrew's oldest brother is known for this. like in a family group chat somewhere he'll be like, yeah, we're having another and then like keeps going.

Who wants Chick-fil-A and we're pregnant? Wow. We could just drop it. Yeah. But like I'm like over, I am like an open book with literally comes from my mom. My mom's exactly the same way. Like anyone I meet will know everything about me

within like an hour if you gave me the time. And I just figure like, okay, if I had to walk through a miscarriage, which I haven't yet, but like, oh, hopefully never but like I have not I'm the type of person that would walk through it like that's just like my personality like I would walk I I do everything kind of like open so I was like what's what's a fear like in my first one we held it and the second one I shared it at like seven or eight weeks and this one was about you know three and a half or four

hours every time she's taking the test on live yeah live no hardly no wait so were you trying or is this like a shock so last time we saw you yeah what did we see you when we came in October November it was November the family made event barely yeah okay obviously we said yeah so we saw you yeah I saw you there um so when we were here you know we were like all right let's just like we should we should have another I don't love being pregnant so like that's the hardest hurdle for me to get over did you get pregnant during the family made event yeah not early It was like at it like downstairs. Yeah, downstairs in the bathroom.

But yeah, we got pregnant that weekend. We had just decided we would try. And literally that video in the Target bathroom was like 12 days later. Wow. I don't know why I feel very honored. Wow. We talked about families all day. We got great.

We got a family made event. Yeah. You made a family there. It was great. we got confident from all the advice and we're like oh we can do this again yeah yeah let's go I think Jamie and Doug

had the same experience wow it was a furrow day there's a lot of babies there were two bathrooms there yeah there was one up one up oh my gosh so bad no yeah so that that was

a makeup for him okay but then at the same time you are currently going through the adoption process I okay so I have always I mean ups and downs through having kids like obviously one at a time but like for we've always wanted a big family like I come from a big family we want a big family I love a ton of people around and so and my siblings I'm one of four and my mom kind of like adopted a fifth we can talk about

that but like so we're best friends like to this day so we work together we like live all within like a half a mile of each other and so I want that from our kids And so we've always wanted five. I just don't. If I'm being honest, I was like kind of over spiritualizing adoption at some point, if I'm being real. And so I've like not had the story

that I feel like most people have where they're like, oh, hey, I feel called to adoption. Like I just have a, you know, I've had like friends say like, oh, I have a heart for this nation. And I'm just like, I don't have that feeling. And so I just always thought like, oh, I'm not going to adopt

because I don't have that feeling. And then we were talking about it one day. And I want a big family, but I don't want to be pregnant more. This might be the end. Right now I feel like this is then. But no, it was just like, we were like. I think she like looked at me and she was like, hey, what do you think about adopting? I'm like, okay, yeah, let's pray about it.

And she's like, well, like, yes, let's pray about it. But like if someone showed up on your doorstep today and had a baby, would you take him? I'm like, of course. And she's like, so then what do we need to think about? Yeah. And I think that's kind of what we came to. We're like, let's just go down that road and see where it goes. And we don't have to over spiritualize it.

it was kind of just like our heart of like we would take someone in if they came and so I'm like why wouldn't we do it we don't want a big family I don't have the desire to birth every child that we have I know I we could love them the same and I think we try to create those environments like in our house right so no one's left behind like even friends and I think her dad did this like really well when we were growing up he was like bring the friends along like I'll buy them dinner I'll do whatever and like people her family has a lot of adopted like not really adopted but like friends that just didn't have, like, great families that had come along and we're like, we have the resources for that. And we, like, have the love for that. And we can, like, show them Jesus. So,

like, why don't we just do that? So I think that's kind of where. That's where it is. And so I said, like, I felt so bad. I was like, but what do you need to pray about? Like, really? I know, like, she had this full thought. She came like, in guns blazes. It was like, okay. It was never a conversation. No, like, she thought about it. She decided already. Then she comes up me and, like, blindsides me. I'm like, okay. podcast but like but a little more serious

but like we I had thought about it for probably you know a full 24 hours at that point and then attack me and then yeah we're still going to counseling over it and so we are kind okay so to answer your question about if we're pursuing adoption we like we like yeah I think that

that would be one thing if I'm being honest that I wouldn't share publicly as we go through it like that is the one thing that I think just out of protection of like a I wouldn't want to share about someone's kid until they're mine um and so like officially mine and so and I wouldn't want to jeopardize that I would be concerned about that so that would probably be the we but I can tell you right now we like stalled it when we got pregnant so we're not like doing it right the second but we did find like the agency that I would love to be a part of we

got to interview with them and we loved to them and so that was cool um and And I would love to pick it back up, like, as soon as we're done. We could walk through it pregnant. They would let me, but I just, I think we have a lot going on in the second. You said y'all over spiritualized the adoption process? Because it seems like you're really under. It was like, no. Well, she didn't want to over spiritually.

I kind of over spiritualized adoption before. And now, like, I just, like, you know, kind of tore all that down. I feel like, okay. I feel like we had a really similar conversation because I had the same thought of all of our friends around us who are like, I was born to adopt. Right. Like, I don't feel like that. But if someone shut up on my door, are you kidding me? I would take them, yeah.

Yes. When you become like a mom, I don't feel like it's for every, you know, the adoption process is for everyone. But if a baby needed a home or a kid needed a home, aren't you kidding, they're ours. Right. Yeah. If a mom ever came to me and was like, I can't, I don't want to do this. I can't do it.

I, whatever, I'd be like, I'll do it. You know, no hesitation. But, yeah. Some people love being pregnant, though. So, Sean didn't like it. I love them for that. I'm happy. Same.

Same. It's hard. Texans would say bless me. You don't love me pregnant? That got cut off weird. Whoa. I'm just saying we're usually better. We are better when I'm not pregnant.

Yeah. Well, Daniel complains that I complain and I'm like, you have no right. No right. Yeah. I do complain a lot. I should not complain because I am grateful. At the end of the day, I'm grateful. I just think it's like in every time has been really significantly harder on my physical body.

Yes. and I am I mean you feel this you're shorter than me I'm short so I'm like big really fast really fast and so yeah this time at six weeks people were asking when I was due it's six weeks I'm like I am six weeks pregnant you should not know that's another reason I probably had to announce early but at that event that we did I remember this when I was 20 weeks pregnant I got asked at that same event three times one was are you having twins yep two was you're due any day now and I was like oh okay yeah and three was like oh you really used to be an athlete like oh stop no they didn't serious i will never forget that she's like you really you used to be like an athlete and i was like i don't

understand how am i supposed to interpret this one right now i'm not supposed to take this as they yeah no yeah we i yeah like i i'm the body change thing isn't my favorite part at all yeah at all at all dan knows he's just shutting his mouth because he i learned a marriage kill one dude he's shutting his mouth dude all I'm saying is as we've gone deeper into marriage had more kids there's more times where I realize

my role is just to take it nod your head and not say anything back it's so hard sometimes you're catching a lot of heat and you just can't let it out and you're like this is prime opportunity for this

No, I'm with you. It's always the right time. We're on the same page. We got it. I got to figure it out a little bit. Did you meet it byola or where? Wow. We did research.

Oh, yeah. We know everything. And you're a chemistry teacher. Yeah. Gosh. But you had a fashion blog at the same time. Yes. Okay, so I'll walk you through the thing.

So Dana and I met, we met on a cruise ship when I was 15. Carnival crew, shout out. We were 15. She doesn't want to go on another cruise. True story also. do not yeah so I was 15 we stop we met we were both like on a family vacation and he was 18 my parents were not happy at all they did not like it and so we like went back we ended up living like 40 minutes apart because it went out of L.A so we lived like 40 minutes apart and then

we dated until he actually went to but wanted to go to biola and I wanted to go to USC ran super random but like I took dual credit in high school and it was like a total god thing because I did not want to go to biola I was like that's good for you I don't want to go there but it was close enough that I wasn't worried like because he was not that far away and so yeah it was just like a course of events where like they wouldn't take all the credits I had yada yada and biola took them all it was like a clear direction for me to go so I was like okay I'll do it so I did it and we ended up going to school together for a couple years and then we graduated we got married like a year after he he proposed after we graduated which at a Christian school I was like

really resentful of that because I was like literally every all of our friends are getting married and here you are like waiting until you have a job like so rude and then I'm getting pressure she's like we've been dating four years right now you know like yeah but like I don't want your parents to pay for us to live in the dorm together like so he like you know wait until he had a job in that kind of thing I'm like I can't like I can't look your dad in the face and be like, hey, can I marry your daughter? We're going to have, like, we're going to live in your house and have Roman Nils. That's just, well, I couldn't

do it. Like, he was super successful. I'm like, I can't do that. He's going to say no. Oh, I respect that, though. Yeah. So he waited. And then after we graduated, we got married, like, a year later, and we'd been together like six years at that point, like, since we were kids.

And so, but I was still so young. I was 21. We had just graduated school. He was 24. And we knew we didn't want kids for a while. So I was, like, on this thing of, like, I had always thought I wanted to be a doctor. I got out of school and, like, during school, had realized, like, I don't think that's what I want to do. Which was, like, a life shock to me because it was like, when he met me, I was so gung-ho. I'm like, that was where I was going to go.

And I literally promised her parents that I'd see her through going to dental school. Yeah, it was like, when I asked her dad, I was like, yeah, and I'll make sure she goes through. And here we are. I feel bad about it. That's what I've said this public. Sorry, Rob. so he did say he would make sure I went through dental school but yeah and then I was just like I don't know what I want to do so I applied to dental school I ended up pulling my application

and didn't finish like applying and I was like okay what am I going to do in the meantime he was working with my dad and I was like all right I'll work in my dad's account like as the accountant in the office I can do that so I did that and was like not what I wanted to do a local private school was like hey we need a chemistry teacher you're basically the only person we know with a science degree like you do it and I was like yeah like how far could it be so I was like sure I'll do it I was 23 oh my gosh so young 22 23 and hottest teacher that's cool for sure um and so I was teaching 10th and 11th graders but I knew it wasn't like my path it was very cool I love high schoolers like it was super fun but at the same time I was like I kind of just said yes

to whatever like not to over spiritualize this either but like yes to whatever God put in my path I was like, okay, I'll do it. I'll try it. Like, I'll just say yes. Especially because I was young. We had no kids. I was like, I'll just say yes to whatever comes at me and, like, do the best job I can and see where it takes us.

And so he was like staying, he stayed working with my dad. And I kind of just said, yes, worked for my dad. And then during that year, his stepdad committed suicide. And so he had young siblings at the time with his mom and his stepdad did. And one of those is Kaylee, who. now is like kind of adopted by my parents but she was 13 at the time and needed somewhere to go and so we took her in so your step sister my half sister so my half sister adopted by her mom yeah yeah we'll get there so we took her at first I was 23 um he was 26 and we had a 13 year old

and so and we're always like those people had everything planned out so we're like okay cool we're going to get married she was 21 and was 24 I'm like okay in three years we're going to have a baby because we want to be, you know, this age, we won't be 40, you know. And so that slowed it down a bunch. We were like, we had a 13-year-old living in our house. We were just married and we had, you know, she was teaching chemistry and we had like our construction office and we were like trying to grow our career and like say yes to everything. And then we had 13-year-old.

I'm like, okay, like how, like you guys know? It's like there's a reason why you're giving a baby first and not have a 13-year-old because you're like, you have deal with boyfriends. Like she had boyfriends that time. I'm like, no, none of that. that out. So we were dealing with that and it was hard and good and we did it. And in the middle of that, Daniel was like, you need a creative outlet.

So like, let's add another thing. So we should, you should blog. So I was like, okay, at the time I was blogging. So I was like, all right, he's right. And so like he like helped like usher me into it. She acts like that, but she would have took a job as like a checker in the grocery store just because she thought that would be fun for three months. She was just like, that would be fun.

When I say, I say yes, I'm like, okay. She just says yes to, like, most random things. I think it's a great strategy, though, to be honest. You and Andrew have a lot of similar traits. Yeah, I just say yes. So I'm learning to say no more. The more we have kids, the older I get, I'm learning to say no more. But which, yeah, it was hard for me.

But I'm learning to say no, and I'm going to go on a total side tangent. But I'm learning to say, because this is like something I'm learning right now in my life. Okay. I don't know who was it that I'm learning this from Jesse Itzler huh yeah yeah it was like learning to say no but making it better than your yes and so I was like okay how can I do that that sounds crazy but he's like if you get invited to a dinner but you just want to stay home with your kids because that's happening now where I want to say no to things instead and just choose nothing essentially like being home instead of doing and he was like can you like you being at the dinner would be memorable but you calling and like paying for their dinner would be more memorable to them and be like, oh my God, she thought of us even if she wasn't here. So turning like your nose into a win.

Turning your nose into a win. So I'm trying to like figure out ways to do that. But anyways, we were in the season of saying yes. We said yes to Kaylee. She came in love with us. And then that was like a year. And then it wasn't like the best environment for her though. Like we're 23, 26.

Hustling. Like we don't have dinner. And we didn't want to take her from like one lonely environment to another lonely environment. Yeah. And so she really needed a family at that time. So we... My parents kind of took her.

Her parents said yes. And at the time they had her brother, which is only like a year and a half older. So it was like their little unit. And it was awesome. Yeah. So she has like great testimony on all of it. Like she spoke at her senior chapel about the whole like event and everything. Really cool.

So my parents had Kaylee from 14 until literally she moved out a week ago into her own apartment. And so she's 22. And so to me she's like, sister because when we started dating she was four and so yeah she is like she's the best she's the best so yeah that's kind of like adopted i guess but not to harp on a sad issue but how did you guys handle your stepdad yeah it was it was it was brutal honestly because like you don't know what you're doing right so i'm like there's tons of situations you come across like Kaylee she's like she asked me like I want to go see him like I want to go see him right and then so I were like okay is this good

It is bad, you know. Well, at the time you had Dan's mom who was obviously, rightfully, like, grieving. Like, that's the hardest thing she could walk through, you know? And then he's the oldest boy, so he's, like, trying to help her navigate everything. So for Daniel, I feel like it was really stalled because it was, like, he did, like, the house and the funeral and all the stuff. So, and then we took Kaylee, like, two weeks later. So it was, like, a lot of stalled. grief yeah I guess you could say because you had to like do all the logistics part of it

figure it all out and make decisions that you don't know like she wanted to go see him a second time like well I don't know like I don't know how to deal with this I don't know how to walk through this like and I'm like gonna just make a decision and just roll with it because that's all we have available at the time so I think going through that you're just like relying on God you're like all right just show much way to go like I'm gonna I'm gonna pick away and I'm just gonna move with it because that's yeah you did a good job you did a good job yeah it was it was crazy but he kind of had to walk through it and thank God we didn't have kids at the time because that would have been a whole other thing but it was just the two of us and they were in

Texas and we were in California and so it was just kind of like a month of crazy and then she came and lived with us and after that things kind of like settled I think for her they settled a lot I think it was really tumultuous like for her before that too I mean there's clearly issues going on until that happened you know and so i think for her hopefully it like ended up providing stability in that season after that like as terrible as it was and like as sad as she was i think you know hopefully a year later we were able to give her like stability and then a more stable family and things like that but it's like the hardest way of doing it yeah for sure yeah we did it why do you think it's how hard for you say no?

I like saying yes. I really don't think I'm not a people pleaser at all. Like it's just like my personality. I just like to say yes. I like it myself. So like I want to try new things. I want to do new things. I want to have a lot on my plate if I'm being honest.

It feels better for me. Yeah. And so that's why I say yes. Not out of like. So I think that has been hard for me to learn because I, want to do it and it's like okay so if i it's like what do i want more now like not not like oh what will people think of me if i say no oh will they be upset if i say no it's more about like i think it's more about what she feels about herself like having a bunch of things going on she's

used to having everything going on so like when we're doing nude she's like okay like i need to take this on take this take and then she like runs herself into the ground so it's like a balance right it's like a balance she needs to say no but if she says no too much then like there's there's nothing and then she feels bad she like I don't feel like some sort of self self worth yeah I definitely get like self-worth out of like what's on my plate like what's the next big thing we're doing what is I definitely like get some sort of self-worth out of that I think we saw that a lot like right after COVID right after we moved to Dallas we had like slowed down on partnerships we're sitting there and we're like, what are we going to do? Like, we're looking at houses to flip where

like we literally have nothing. And that's how nudes got birth. It was like, it felt like the longest nine months of our life because we're like, I don't have anything to do. Not that it's wrong, but I'm like, stay at home dad. And I'm like, what? Like, we need something. And I think since then she's tried to pack things on our plate because she's like worried that we're going to feel like that again. But yeah. Yeah. And we're like at the end of the day, I think there's like a, there's like a beauty to it. Like we're builders. Like that is what we do. like we like it it's fun for us um but it's like trying especially now with little kids like trying to find that balance of like I feel like it's I hate saying this because I don't always feel like

it's always a trade off but like in some senses there is a point where you are trading like you're trading your time with one thing for another and so but I'm like a big believer too and like you know I bring our kids along for it like and so but at some point it's like okay well if I am gone traveling not much like then my kids I won't be home to put them to bed and I like want to be I want to do that so it's just a trade of like how to do both well and we're definitely still figuring it up we're figuring it out do you have a hard time saying no no I'm good I like I love people around yeah he does but like also at the same point if I don't then I'll just go my room I feel like he's chill yeah you guys are swapped with us yeah because like I'm like oh yeah

no I'm fine whatever and he's we we balance each other out just like that it causes like a weird tension for because I'm like wow the world is our hoister and there's so many opportunities and like this is so fun dude like we could do anything it's gonna be awesome and Sean I've grown to appreciate it and it's so necessary but like sometimes I'm like yo you're kind of raining on my parade here like let's get let's both get excited about something but as opposed to getting frustrated now I've realized oh I just need to keep searching for the thing that we're both excited about and that's going to be the best thing but it's super hard that's cool she normally has these crazy ideas and I'm just the

person that makes them happen so like I'm like I just give me an idea I'll make it happen yeah I'm definitely the visionary one of for sure and and to the point of the self-worth like if I don't have a vision I'm like what am I doing like what you know but he is good at like I will come up with the craziest thing and he'd be like we can do it and so yeah he is definitely it's super cool to see our team like adopt that too because initially like the ideas she have are like so wild she's like all right we're going to do this pop up we're going to do it in 30 days and everyone's like no no no but like the people on our team that've been there for a while like guys just jump on if you don't jump on like it's just going to make really hard we're going to do it anyways like it's going to happen

whether you think it's possible or not it's going to happen right so like I think I've just got a very, I'm like, she's not going to let it go. Like, we're not just going to back out of this. If she has the idea, we're going to make it happen. I kind of get this from your person. I'm like a hype girl too. Like I get excited about something and I want to do it. Like, I don't want to sit. If I wait two months, I'm going to lose a hype. I'm not going to be excited anymore. So like, we execute fast and it makes it fun. I think it makes it fun. Why do you have a hard time saying now? I just, I think one of my best qualities and worth qualities is like, I see the potential good and everything, you know?

And it's like, even with people, again, I love talking to strangers. I think it's like life's greatest adventure is meeting someone new. Sean doesn't feel that way. And I'm like, so I always just want to say, yeah, I'll go meet new people. Yeah, we'll go to this event. Yeah, we'll do this. Because there's always a potential good. Maybe it's FOMO more than anything.

But it's like, yeah, I think it's a self-worth thing. Like, this feels meaningful. If we don't do something, then what, like, I think I always create the worst alternative that we might possibly do. So it's like, well, if we don't go to this event or don't do this, what are we going to sit at home and watch Netflix? Like, this is way better than doing. That's me.

Yeah. But that's not reality. Okay, I see a lot. I feel like you always, too, you have this like motto in your head of if you aren't being challenged, then you have lost your purpose. Mm-hmm. So like, if he doesn't have his plateful constantly trying something new, learning or trying to like fix something or figure something out,

Nothing good happens. Like you have to constantly be being challenged. Yeah. That makes sense. We had this thing in January where I took time off social media for the first time in literally eight years. I had never done it. And we like went away.

And for the first time too, I felt like I don't have an idea of like what's next. Like I don't. And it scared me so bad. And I like hated it. And to be honest, I look back. It's still fresh. I don't love it still. I mean, I have ideas now, but, like, that period, I felt like I was being taught, like, how, like, that it's okay to just be for a second.

And I still don't love that, but it was, like, definitely a period. We, like, went away the two of us, and I was like, oh, I'm going to get, like, literally, we went away. And I felt like, I am going to get, like, this, like, download of a vision. what we're away and I did not and I was like okay what I do is just wasting my time like but it wasn't it was like so good and so refreshing but especially in January I'm like a dreamer I'm like I'm gonna get something like good out of this and I didn't and literally the whole point I think of that 11 days that I was like off the grid was just like to be and yeah I think like too over spiritual I said I think I was just like hey like you have your own ideas like we don't need that next idea

Like it's going to come Like and I think one of the verses That Darrylame really got we got like super like simple Like takeaways from it And it almost felt like we need like these massive like takeaways Like we always have like all right we're going to plan this huge thing But like they were just like simple things And one of them was like a verse and it was talking about like

Wait I didn't get charged for my donut It was free with this Tim's rewards points I think I just stole it I'm a donut stealer Ooh Earned points so fast, it'll seem too good to be true.

Plus, join Tim's rewards today and get enough points for a free donut, drink, or timbits. With 800 points after registration, activation, and first purchase of a dollar or more, see the Tim's app for details at participating in restaurants in Canada for a limited time. This episode is brought to you by Square.

You're not just running a restaurant. You're building something big. And Square's there for all of it. Giving your customers more ways to order. Whether that's in person with Squarespace, Kiosk or online, instant access to your sales, plus the funding you need to go even bigger, and real-time insights so you know what's working, what's not, and what's next. Because when you're doing big things, your tools should to.

Visit square.ca to get started. Don't you see it? Like, don't you see what I'm doing? And it's like, we're sitting here going like, no, like I don't see it, but like he's making it happen. It's not relying on us. It's not relying on our next idea. an idea that he gives us to execute it's him like it's god giving it to us and he's doing it like he's doing the work yeah because i'm such a doer and i'm such a worker and so for me to sit

back and be like okay like give it up and be like okay like i truly believe like i truly say like oh god can do more with it than i can but do i like believe that or do i just try to like force it to happen you know it's interesting you're still like focused on the vision though you know it's like You're worried that if you don't have the vision, then there's nothing. But it's like, I don't know, I've been pondering, okay, what if, like, what if I just was a guy and I just, you know, was working on a, like, what if I was just doing really nothing and took care of my neighbors and my kids? I think that would be okay, you know? Yeah. Have you read Ruthless Elimination or Hurry?

No. No, but we will. I tried. No, I tried, and I just didn't like it. It's too slow for you? Is that? No, I need to. Have you read it?

Yeah, yeah. It's good. And then another one called Necessary Endings by Henry Cloud. I've never even heard of that one. I've really been in this phase of like do less. I should do less. Because I don't know, it's almost like a self-ident anything. Like at some point, you know, we'll be 80 years old.

And then how will I feel about myself when I'm not able to achieve or not able to lift all the heavy weights? I'm like, I would like to gain that perspective as much now as I can. And that's, that's, it's freaking hard. And I don't know how to do it, but it's like, think about it. Yeah. Pray about it. Well, and I kind of feel this, I feel this pressure of like, I need to get, get that now. Because, like, I, and we do.

Like, we enjoy our kids so much. I don't think I could look back because I'm always, like, sad when I look back at pictures. And we talk about it all the time, but it's like, we loved it then. Like, I couldn't have loved it more, you know? But at the same time, like, I don't want to not get that now. I want to get it now when they're little so that I don't look back at 80 and be like, okay, I'm content now, but I wasn't content then.

So yeah, it is important to me. I'm working on it, but it's definitely important in something that I'm trying to like, you know, actively be okay with. While at the same time recognizing that like, I do love this for a reason. Like, and I do, it is good. Yeah.

But, like, how do I make sure that I don't sacrifice something in the process or like not feel you know that's that's that's that's that's what we're learning trying to that's that's really good i'm really enjoying this perspective i appreciate that i'm curious oh so so you mentioned you were a stay-at-home dad for a phase you mentioned that you were working for her dad for a phase yeah what's been your trajectory so it's kind of funny like i really just like building the business part so when we were going to start nudes right i like served her dad's business i like ran that thing which was what a construction company.

So I started, I left college, and I started working as a labor in the field, literally digging ditches, like $15 an hour for two years. You got them, yeah, you got those callous hands. Yeah, like, honestly, I back some of them. And so like, okay. It's a tribute. You should have just taken it. No, no, no.

The only reason I'm saying this is because it's like, it's funny because I walked in the construction industry. Like, didn't use shovel before, and I'm shaking guys' hands. And, like, my whole life growing up, I'm like, oh, I'm so different. My hands are like, Jack, you have old man hands at, like, eight, right? And I get into construction. I start shaking these guys' hands. They're like, oh, you've been doing this forever. And I'm like, this is where I'm meant to be.

Like, I'm going to go to spot. They accept me. Instant street cred. They, like, yeah, instant street cred. You know, and like, all the construction guys are like, you don't know anything. You're green. You're like, you don't know, right? So, anyway, so we started there in the construction company.

There were five of us. So it was. Including me and Dan. so five total so we had like not even one to one employee to family ratio and we I stayed there for like nine years built that business from the five of us to 100 and at the same time her Instagram kind of took off and we like self-managed and I ran the back end of that so I just like the building of the business part so when we when we got done she's like all right we did construction you did my thing like you come over something i'm like i don't care like i was like i'll do

what you want to do now i'm like we can sell makeup women's underwood i don't really care this is in the nine months you're talking about like the yeah i was like what do you want to do like because we've at this point he's like done my dad's business he like built my social media business for me i'm like okay what do you want to do like like i'll do what you want to do and i really don't care what it is i just want to build it i want to create the structure i want to figure out how to maximize like from like running the back end of like brand deals and negotiations like I wanted to like always like exceeding seed and like negotiate better or whatever and so I think that's why that nine months was hard for me even though I'm not like the visionary or habit like I'm like self-worth was caught up in it

because I'm like okay well I'm not doing anything like I'm not moving to like what you were saying I'm not like achieving the next thing I feel like stagnant right now but he's like very okay where I'm dedicated to but I'm like I get fueled by like the next thing the next thing the next thing the next thing you know like the like what's exciting i get fueled by like excitement he's like very dedicated for like the long haul like he stayed in my dad's company for like nine years building that you know and so whereas like okay i'm gonna teach chemistry and i'm gonna blah blah like i'm kind we can take it and optimize and make it better and make it better and make it better over like a long period of time so like when she has the next idea i'm like we can still make this twice as good

yeah and we'll do that too because if not we'll be in trouble yeah you mentioned you like kind of sitting back and watching everything and I think we saw your self-proclaimed Instagram husband what's your like how do you approach that her but you know darrell and we're in similar situations yeah like Sean is the the main event and that's yeah anyway I'd love to hear your thoughts I I love it honestly like I love just I joke about it a lot of times I'm like they're like what do you do I'm like I just take pictures like I just like to fall in the shadows like I I like to do that. Like, I like to, people to under assume, like, what I do.

Because it doesn't really matter the other day because, like, the self-worth, all that stuff comes from me. So I don't really mind what, like, people think. Yeah. And I'd rather not get into it. I'd rather, like, let her shine and let her do her thing and just roll on the backside. It's, like, fine with me. Like, I don't need to talk to people all day. Like, we were just joking about this other day.

Like, she walks into the gym and I'm working out, and there's pure silence. And she's like, what are you doing? like why but like i can just do that like i'm fine just work out silent yeah literally i'm like only psychopaths do this i love what it's when i it's like we're balanced for sure like clean like clear my head yeah that's why work out he's good with quiet i like love people so like i would and he's he was dead serious earlier i don't even know if you caught it but like i will have 10 people in our house at all times and i like thrive in that i love it and i like thrive in that i love it and And like, till I go to sleep, like, and he will just be happy while we're having 20 people

there to just go in his room and just sit. And I don't, I mean, I noticed that, like, I love, okay, to be fair, I love people too. Yeah, he does, he does. And I hang out with them. But, like, I'm okay. I'm definitely on another level of that. Our, Rhett, our first son, our only son, right, hope, I don't know. I don't know.

But, um, Rhett is the same way. He's like almost even more than you. He's like, let's get everyone over. Like he was getting mad at me the other day. He's like, why aren't you letting people come over? I'm like, dude. We're just having dinner on the four of us. Like one night this week, bro.

Oh, man. But yeah. People over every night pretty much? Literally. I'd say like five, six nights a week. Yeah. Like your family or? Yeah.

And then like, yeah. Random friends. Our door is like always open. Like when we're not there, like they're probably having dinner there two night with everybody and we're just not there yeah i looked on my camera when we left for last week we had to go to new york for work and i looked on my camera and i was couldn't get a hold of my mom shit and my kids and i was like what's she doing like did she home yet did she leave with them whatever so i'm like looking at the cameras in our house and i look in our kitchen and there's

11 people in the kitchen and i'm like we're not even there and there's like 11 people and it made me so happy but he's like chill either way i'd say he'd like thrive on people there like four nights a week and I like six but so we compromise and have people six times sounds similar I was like we are similar that we were

before baby like we're in baby phase or like infant phase which is harder yeah but we have like the revolving door we're a solid four nights a week usually I think it's important for the kids to see too where it's like the idea of hospitality and I don't know for sure

okay I think you guys have read the habits of household book? They were the ones who told us about it. Dude, it's so good. Do you guys like it? Do you like it? Okay, yeah.

Okay, is that the book where they talk about like the difference between hospitality and hosting? Yes. Okay, yeah. Yeah. I love that. Explain it for those listening. Okay.

So, oh, I might butcher it, but I'm going to try. Okay. So he talks, I think he talks about like hospitality where you just like invite people into your space and like how you do life and you just let them do life with you. Yeah. And you're not like putting on a show. not, like, hosting them. You're not, like, you know, doing anything different out of your ordinary other than having people into your ordinary. And then it talks about, like, hosting

where you, like, you know, it's kind of more of like a production. Like, you, like, get everything ready and whatever. And I think, I would say we lean more on hospitality than hosting. Like, I'm a no frills person for sure. If you come over, we're not bringing out China. You're paper plates. Yeah. Yeah. And so I was like, okay, this is cool. Like, it gave me a why for like why we're doing it that way not so much like changing it but like almost like double downing on why we're doing it that way so you allow people to do the dishes and it's not like this big production like you said when you're being hospitable yeah come in yeah and be apart which makes it so much more sustainable and enjoyable it's as opposed to you know in the south

it's all about hosting and it's and people do it less because it's takes a lot of work yeah exactly and i think people enjoy more like coming into your situation and like things they come back because they're like oh that was like this is like a family this how it is it it's not not a show right yeah we do these uh we'll send this to you too we do these yearly goals that take all day to do and but they like set our tone for the entire year for everything yeah oh yes it takes like a really long time it's i love that probably my favorite thing um but in our yearly goals we wrote that every single friday is um pizza and movie and it has to include at least one family every Friday of the entire year and we do like a

friend's dinner a date night like we'll literally break down what we want every week to look like for the entire year pretty much that's so cool but it is that like hospital like hospitality vibe of I just want people in our house right that's so cool in a yeah in our space like doing life with us not like so much us yeah and don't give me wrong I love like buying people dinner and all of that like that's super fun but I'm just not the one that's going I think to your point now that you said it like it's not sustainable and I want it more frequent than that like the hosting thing especially with working and kids I'm just like our house is a mess nine times out of 10 and like after work I'm not going to go clean it and then get everything ready and then

do all the thing but I still want you there you know so like how do we make that sustainable yeah I love it. I would do it more. So you all move from L.A. to Texas and all your families in Texas now? Did your whole family move as well? Yeah. We were all deep.

We just bring everyone. Dude, the whole squad? Our nanny move. When's the Texas to Nashville happening? I don't know. I'm really happy. I love it there. It's so good for our family.

Like we were in this season. Like, first of all, it's not that like commendable to move anyone out of California right now. Everyone wants to leave. So, like, everyone's like, how'd you convince? I'm like, you don't have to convince anybody. But, like, so we moved or we talked about, to your point, really, or bringing things up. I was 38 weeks pregnant.

And Dano goes, I want to start looking for places to move. And I was like, I'm literally giving birth here, like, in two seconds. And he's like, how soon can we go look at places? And I was like, I don't know. And so we got on a plane that was December 29th. I gave birth. and like the second week of February we were on a plane to look at

Oh my gosh Places to move He was like very serious And we looked at Scottsdale That was like our first thought Of where we'd go Honestly I think it was more of a comfort zone thing Like it wasn't too far from where we were used

It was 45 minute flight So we'd go back to the construction company Like all that And it's like okay we can just go back and forth And like I think we would have been half in half out If we ended up in Scottsdale Yeah and then we looked at And we'd always said literally

these words came out of our mouth. We'll never move to Texas. No, we will never move to Dallas. Yeah, specifically. And we did. And so then we went and looked. We looked at Scottsdale. My parents, like, were in a season.

My dad was, like, semi-retired, so they didn't care. My other siblings at the time were not home. Like, so my sister was married in Nebraska. My brother was in college, and my other sister was in medical school. So it was just like they were, we lived like a half mile or less from them. And so it kind of was good for. for them because they were like going into like semi being like slowing down let's just say I wouldn't call it retired right slowing down and so they were like yeah we're open to it and so we

looked and we went to Scottsdale my that's where my mom wanted to be so I was like I can make that work like we'll go and we both went I would have anything work yeah he would have he didn't care so we looked and I was so nervous to tell my mom because I knew she wanted to live in Scottsdale and she like never voices what she wants and I like had no peace when we went I looked at I was like it for us like and um I like sat down with her and we got back like at lunch or whatever and I was like what did you think and she was like I don't think it's right and I was like oh my gosh so we didn't go just because I felt the same and I was she like wanted it so bad so I was shocked to hear the words come out of her mouth and then we went to Dallas all together

and we like loved it and it was like a solid like yes from all of us and so this is it And so we, that was in March. So, like, the first week of March. And so our daughter was two months old. And then we moved. Yeah. May, we had an offer on a house. Uh-huh.

And we moved. What, did the idea of moving out, like, why were you so antsy about it? Oh, okay. Yeah. Sorry. No, no, no. We're just Donna. No.

I think, I think, just California in general. Like, it isn't, like, one political party of me. know it was just everyone everyone just like tired of being told what to do yeah i think also like you'll get this so like on the social media front right you work in your house a lot you're filming stuff inside your house and so that was like our whole like our outlet was going out on the weekend or going out to the park like doing events outside like either at night we go out to dinner or like we go on the weekends and like covid shut that all down so like we were literally just stuck in our house right so you're filming was like a different beast like you didn't get really

leaf like in January February like we'd go to take our I mean it's nice in California in January forever but we'd go to take like our son to the park and it's like you cannot like it's caution taped like you're not allowed in this is like a year into it and so like I remember us we went to a restaurant for the first time in June of 2021 so like a year and a half later and so it was just too long I think of like us being stuck if I'm being honest of like okay it kind of like there was no progress being made like two point earlier and it's like how long can I do this like I felt like I was wasting a year and I'm like why don't we just go somewhere and like they change it up right like and I think a lot of the attractive things there's tons of great things about LA

like in general we always go back and visit it but I think it was just like build up and build up build up a bunch of things and we're just like there was a lot of benefits yeah and then you know taxes a bunch of other stuff there was a bunch of benefits and we're kids were young so we're like if we're going to do it we're going to try it to find like somewhere for our family we should do it Like, and so all those things together, we just kind of like. And all your siblings were like, all right, we're in? Okay. That's like a conglomerate effect.

So my parents went because we were the only ones and we had kids. And so they went with us, bought a house near where we bought a house. And then my brother at the time, this was like May June. So he had just was graduating from college and he applied for jobs and he got one in Dallas. So he just like went there after college, like literally straight from school. and then Kaylee was going to go to She was going to go to Biola

But again like Schools weren't starting back up In California And it was her like first college experience So she was like I'd rather go somewhere Where I could go live in the dorm And like be So she was like

Okay I'll go to a school in Dallas And so Then I'm trying to think So that was the two younger ones That were easy And then my sister in med school Actually just moved to Texas I got placed in residency a year

ago in Dallas so like oh my gosh and then she like we've obviously tried to make this work at this point but like yeah so like it just um and then my other sister ended up she had like lived in Nebraska for a long time in a like really sad abusive marriage and so then when she finally got like the courage to leave she came like escaped wow that was a crazy story so like she called me one day and I was like booked her a flight like immediately um And she came within 24 hours. And so that was, like, crazy. And so now she's there and thriving.

And her girls are thriving, and our kids get to live right next to each other. It's so cool. And your siblings, so Kaylee's your half-sister. Kaylee's my half-sister. I have, like, full brother. He lives in Florida. Okay, gotcha.

And then my parents both live in California. I think my mom. We're hoping. Yeah, my mom, Kaylee's mom, is going to move out to Dallas. She was just there this weekend. It was kind of weird. We like flip-flop. So Kaylee was at, like,

When she was 13, she was actually living in Dallas and we were living in California. And then we flopped. So it's kind of weird. So I think my mom will come back. We think she'll come back. We hope. Your sisters are your best friends? My best friends and my brother.

My brother works for nudes full time, like full full time. He ended, he went to work for like a real estate investment company when he moved to Dallas. And so then when we started nudes, he was like all gung ho to like help us start it. And so he works. He does our ops. He is like insanely smart. Insanely smart. Yeah, he's great.

We can't go without him. He's amazing. Wow. Yeah. And so Rob works with us full-time. And then my sister has like her own business doing influencing, which is so cool. And Kaylee actually works for us too. She does all influencer box like planning events. So yeah, that's not enough. So I need to have them over six nights a week. So no, yeah, but it's cool. It's really fun. You're not the oldest, are you? I'm the oldest. Oh, wow. So I'm the middle of five and Sean's a only child. The whole like

when you're close with your siblings i'm not sure there's anything better like there's no better relationship just because like the depth of knowledge and the shared experience is amazing and all my siblings live in indianapolis within a 10 minute yeah no way yeah it's crazy so there's always this tension of like always you want to preserve that special family culture thing you know and now that we have kids and they have eight cousins it's like it's such a tough balance to try to figure out personal ambitions and like what your style is which john and i love nashville versus how much of that do we sacrifice for the family which you know i think that answer changes over time yeah yeah it changes over time i think like we're lucky and like to be in this season especially where my sister

needs us of like she's a single mom and like has two girls and like so we kind of raise our kids in this community style of i'm not i'm like all for like i'm like you can correct them you know like help help me because it's helping me you know and so and same like so she needs obviously help she's gotten no one to help her but me and you know all of us but and I have like an open door there's someone help to help care of the kids all the time and so it's just like cool because at this stage like they get to be together like their um our kids are five and three and their cousins are six and four so they're six five four three and so they like act like siblings like fight like siblings and it's great and so we kind of like raise them

all together in like a little try but for us right now it works like I see the tension of like it's fun the cousin thing is fun yeah it's cool thanks for rubbing it in darling sorry okay maybe one day we'll bring that up at counseling maybe one day to your point of the season who knows yeah you guys ever toy with it oh yeah yeah but it I mean, we're, I could live anywhere. I could live anywhere. Our, our situation has been different just because coming, I was born and raised in Des Moines, Iowa.

So like, middle of nowhere. Yeah. Single child. Single child. My parents have moved here. And, like, it was a huge sacrifice for them to live, leave everything that they had kind of, like, built up. Forever, yeah.

But they're here for grandkids. And, like, we've really established, like, a community. And given my career. I like didn't have like a friend group because I traveled so much, everything. And I've rebuilt everything in Nashville to the point where like I have my solid group of people. So it's always been scary to me of I don't want to start over on that even though we'd have my sister-in-law's and like everything. But no, building friends like that was I'm realizing too like and natural friends like I'm sure you've realized this too as you've like built your own as an adult. community around you like I'm doing that right now so like it takes time like it takes a long time like

yeah so when we first moved to Dallas like the first year I didn't know hardly anyone right and my kids aren't in school yet like they don't have those like automatic people that we're hanging out with and so this is our first year like literally in our yearly goals to talk about them ours aren't as sophisticated as yours I literally have to get that but um it's we were like twice a month like we have to go out with friends, be intentional about having friendships with people like from our church and like building that community because I can get so safe in like my bubble of my family and people I know that I don't branch out. And it's like a guard, a tiny bit. Like I'm in a new space. I hate to say it like this, but like I'm like, okay, does someone know something about me that I

don't know about them? I feel a little bit vulnerable. Like I'm like, okay, I really want, I just want like a friend. Like I just want to be like me and like a normal friend. And so like how do I make a friend as an adult? It's like a weird thing. Yeah, we're still going through that right now. We're going through. We had to slow down to create space for that, right? Because if not, we'd just be too busy. We have business and stuff going. And we used to like, like, say it before. It's like, oh, like we don't have time for high maintenance friends. You know, like we'll see you this month. We'll see you six months from now. And then like ultimately that's just not being a good friend. And we used to make excuses for it that way. And so, like, this last year, we were, like, intentionally, like, we're going to meet with people.

We're going to, like, we have tons of people that we could, like, develop relationships with at church. And then we're just moving that way right now. Yeah. And it's been really cool. But to your point, it takes work and effort. And, like, when you build it, it's, like, solid then. And we're in the middle of that. Like, I have, like, I can think of, like, five girlfriends right now that I'm like, okay, this is going to be solid.

Like, this is what I, like, want. I wouldn't want to leave it. It's hard. You don't want to redo it. It's really hard. That perspective on friendship hits me. Getting old is so interesting in the sense that like, you know, everyone starts having some skeletons in the closet kind of or you have mistakes or whatever, different styles,

especially with parenting. Like people's styles really get differentiated. And I've been like thinking about what does it actually mean to be a friend? And it's like, is it just people that make me feel happy? or laugh all the time. It's like, no, that's terrible. Like, you have to, there is, there is an obligation to it or a commitment where it's, hey, Billy needs me to, whatever, come, he needs to share something about.

And I, I think traditionally in college, you have so many people around you or so many, like, you have your choice of, I don't want to be with him. He's, like, sad today or what, you know, whatever it is. But adult friendships are a different element, but more important, I think, in a lot of ways so yeah and it's like it's like anything else like it takes work right like to like build our family like it's there's a lot of work that goes into our family being so close it means having uncomfortable conversations it means like like airing things out airing it out and and like really making sure that we're aligned and like that's why it's so good and like we're looking at putting

that much effort into friendships so those are good that's really good stuff that we're like working on we don't have to figure out no that's really good and we're actively like walking through that right now and like laying down to one creating space and two laying down like some of our other things that we want to do to build that build and invest in those friendships we'll be your friends okay we are tell us about nudes because this is a nude shirt newt hat some percentage of the nudes rocks it is my passion project we like did not need another business endeavor we did that was getting For not meeting another business endeavor, it's rush it. It is a monster. I really

would love to believe. I mean, it's absolutely blessed. Like that is, like, it is beyond my doing. But at the same time, I think that it is my, it's what I'm passionate about. It's never been like, I hope and people hopefully feel that it's never been my purpose to like sell them another item. Like that was never the goal. The goal was like to create something that made people feel good. And so I think that people feel that. And so I hope that that's why it's doing so well. I really feel that that's why it is. But it has been fun and very challenging. And I got into it because I love the creative part of it. Like I love, I wanted to make, I was like, I've never made clothes before.

I know nothing about making clothes. Like, I could try it. So then we tried it. And we found people to help us. And like right now I'm the CEO. creative director and I would love to just be the creative director and like have someone help me do the CEO part that's not you know running the business he's he's like a CEO of it and like running the business is great but I just like love to be the visionary and the

I'm ready to do the fun part so I think like we're making transitions now that it is growing to like try to let me do the part I'm like really good at and thrive in and love so that because I think the business overall will do better if I can stay in that lane. I'm like, hey, I love this. Like, let me just throw budgets and caution to the wind. Like, I hate doing the scene. She just wants to have the crazy idea and us implement it. And she's a little more involved in operations right now and social part of it. The poor events girl came to me for, and did a meeting with me. And I'm like, oh, yeah, add that. And I'm like, say they're going like, it needs to be on budget. It doesn't make sense. She's like, well, Darrell said, I'm like, don't worry about what she

says like it has to work she doesn't care if it's in budget but like it ultimately has to like we're running a business at the end of the day I'm like you brought me these sick ideas of course I'm going to say yes to it go but um no yeah it's it's been super fun super challenging um yeah I think there's like 35 of them and it is yeah it's it's a lot yeah um we have lots of creative people on our team um and it makes it like makes it super fun it's definitely something that we didn't expect to take off like it's taken off and I think a lot of people looking from the outside go like okay you got it figured out you got it together no we're just winging it like we're literally like figuring out like we're trying to get people who know

what they're doing on our team now so that we're not winging it all the time we're doing a lot of things right we're saying yes to lots of things and then going back and just not making the same mistake I think that's like our whole team as a whole yeah we're like okay making mistakes we're just not okay making them multiple times in a row and so like we're that's what we're doing we're moving forward and yeah we had a factory we met with last week and we were in New York and the looked at me and he's like you just really break all the rules don't you I'm like I don't even know what the rules are I don't know anything about making clothes so like sure I'm breaking all the rules but I think that's the other reason why it's doing well is because we knew nothing about

fashion more just like you know selling clothes or whatever but nothing actually about making the clothes how to develop a brand so we did a lot of unconventional things right and I think industries and get in the spot where they're like really like think tank and like this brand's doing this this brand's doing it and we just didn't know like we didn't know we picked our colors, like our core colors off of paint chips from Sherwin-Williams. And they're like, what about pantones? I'm like, I don't know. I got this paint chip. I got these grout colors. Can you translate? No, literally drought colors and paint chips. And I was like, they're like, what about pantones? I'm like, can you try to match it? I'm like, I don't know. That's what I got. But

and I think even down to like the things that you just don't do. Like in the industry, you have a fit model and you size up on that one model. So you scale it. So like you have a small and then they make it extra large just by increasing neck size and stuff and we're like well we didn't even know that to start we didn't know we're like we want to fit it on these three people because like yeah it makes sense and they're like no you can't do that I'm like we're gonna do that like because we didn't know like we knew no different like and so I think all those things that we know new different we know we know no different yeah that like are the things that are like leading to success because people have done it so long the same way yeah you're throwing out the old

yeah which without even knowing really didn't work But, like, honestly, if we knew all this stuff, we would do it the same way everyone's doing it. Yeah. But we know no better. Yeah. And so it's working. And it's fun and crazy and a lot. But he, like, runs it in the day to day.

And I come up with the ideas. And we do them. And it's fun. It's a good, we're a good little tag team. I think you guys will get this because I was talking to one of my really good friends. And she works for a husband and wife too. And I think if you, I think a lot of people look at us and are like, how can you work together? Like how do you work together all day?

And then like how do you like make that work? And I think if it works for you, it is the coolest dynamic that you can have because I don't think it's for everybody. I really don't. But like for us, we've done it for a long time. And it is literally we were talking about last night. It is the coolest dynamic because I feel like we are. I mean, we can talk about how we're not on the same team sometimes, but like, we are like so on the same page and like this weird way of like, but two sides to a different coin. And it makes it work so well. And so I think it's like, I feel really lucky that we have that dynamic because I think that's one of the strengths of nudes. One of the strengths of like different businesses we've built is that we get to like do it together. And it does work for us. And it's really cool. But I think it the husband and wife dynamic.

can make it super successful if it's the right fit you know i'm with you i feel like uh from a marriage perspective there's benefit to i mean shan i're together all day if we're apart for like an hour a day that's a that's a lot of time apart yeah which that's probably different for y'all but like i get to know her in such a different way and like to hear her ideas and how she looks at problems like it's so fun and i can't imagine if we were apart from each other for eight hours a day like how much I would be missing about what I would be getting to know. But then also from a business perspective, like, I heard that the Hebrew word for Eve as an Adam and Eve means beneficial adversary. Have you heard this? And it's like the friction you feel and the different perspectives,

it's like for the benefit. And I think business wise, we've compromised together. And like just the different perspectives and the knowledge about where we're each coming from has contributed it's so much to like where we end up going and it's it's really fun I think too you learn the benefit of that friction like the longer you do it yeah so like for example my brother is a huge part of nudes and where like I trust him and like the strategy and like the logistics and all of those the things he like knows and he like fully leans into it now that we've done it for like 10 11 years he like fully leans into and trusts like my gut because like we go with my gut a lot right and at first like a lot of times my gut is like contrary to what you would think you should do or like

what logistically works but he like at this point in it hasn't always been this way but at this point in it fully like almost right respects that more than anything and like what the numbers or analytics say and like someone blindly coming into it like maybe like her brother or something and it's like, well, this is what the numbers say. Like, that doesn't make sense. I'm like, well, it makes sense because that's how we've done it and that's been successful. She says it, I say, holy spirit, whatever. It's true.

Like, I, like, really, like, try to, over the years, I wasn't confident in it always. But I think that, like, even becoming a mom and things like that have helped me, like, lean into that, like, discernment that I feel sometimes or, like, whatever I'm feeling. And he, like, we're at a point now where, like, he absolutely. is like, okay, we're going to go with that because he just, like, respects it and trust it. And I think there's a certain knowing, like, when, I mean, she has tons of ideas, right?

And I'm like, okay, I know, like, which ones of these we can actually make happen. I know which ones are like, your actual desire. And someone just, like, speaking out of maybe even insecurity, other areas, but just from knowing each other, like, I know, like, I know what's, like,

what her heart's actually saying, you know? Because of the man of time. It's time. Like, honestly, it's time, too. I think, like, it's like, we've spent a long time together a lot of hours, like, every day. And so, like, he has this knowing of a lot. And there are times where I, like, fully speak out of insecurity. And, like, he's all, mm-mm, that's not it. And so I just, it's true.

Like, I think it's really good. We were a good, like, check and balance for each other. Yeah. It's so cool when you can do it right. Yeah. It's really cool. Thanks for ripping marriage well. Yeah.

Making a cool in that sense. Same you guys. I'm curious. It's not always cool. No. no but it's cool that you say that yeah it is it's not always cool I mean we've been through a lot I think our our marriage thing is like that we've stood on is we've had seasons long seasons where like we don't feel like we like it like I I swear like all of 2019 the year we

had our first son I could not say that I can we can I think we can both say very confidently I did not like being married. I didn't like him. I didn't like, I'm not, I mean, I loved him, but I didn't feel like I liked it. I didn't feel like I liked our life. We were definitely passing ships. And I think the business part on that,

like we just became good business partners, which actually like fueled that fire a little bit. Yeah. So it's like, okay, we need each other for business, but that's it, right? And it's like, poured into marriage. Like, now marriage became business. Like, and it didn't become, like, the opposite.

it it yeah and so we kind of became like passing ships and like we got to a point where it was like we we're really good at working together and it became like we were just working together at home like we weren't like we were we took something that was like so good is our strength and it almost became like our weakness at that point because like we didn't have the romance part of it we didn't like like each other right so like it was something that's like such a strength that ended become like I think like what I've learned like I'm by we laugh because like literally we just did a vow renewal last year and the people who did our premarital did like the first part of the vow renewal and our current pastors did the second part and like new vows but the we looked at

them they did our premarital when they had been married as long as we are right now and I'm all I do not feel like like how you did that like I I mean I would do it for somebody but at the same time I'm like I'm not qualified for that I'm not I don't feel like I've learned and I feel like what I have learned though and I think it's okay is that and what society I feel like feels differently about is not every part of marriage or season or year has to feel good and that doesn't mean it's wrong like so like I feel like there's huge benefit in sticking through something when it doesn't feel good because we had a whole year where it didn't feel good and I don't think that means oh he's not right for me anymore or oh we should try something else or whatever like if I would have gone with

how I felt rather than just what I said then I think it would have turned out and I think time like tells us too like whenever we have a hard year like that or a hard season it's the best season right after yeah and I think it's like it's a reward for making it through that season and sticking to it And so, like, every single time, I think there's probably at least been three. Yeah. Like, three seasons. 2019 was terrible for us. It was great.

I mean, we had our first kid. There were parts of that year that were the best. But, like, overall, like, us, it wasn't our high. Like, it was our low, right? And so I think that, but then 2020 was definitely one of our highs, I would say. And, like, we needed that to walk into, like, 2021, where we, like, made huge, transitions and moved our family and all of that um but yeah we like had to get help sure to get out of it i don't think i don't know how we would have gotten out of it without help i mean we probably

would have but like i'm a big stick it out person so i think like to us we never talked about divorce yeah we never bring we never bring up divorce and you know that we're just like really unhappy like with each other we never say that because that's like we know that's not an option but it's like i think it got to the point it's like how much longer are we going to live in this Like, how much long are we going to do this and just be passing ships and be yelling at each other? Like, we're yelling at each other. Like, we didn't do that. The first, like, nine years in our marriage and then, like, we just started doing it.

And it's like, it just became the normal. And we're like, we got to fix this. Like, how much longer are we going to deal with this for? Summer's here. And you can now get almost anything you need for your sunny days delivered with Uber Eats. What do we mean by almost? Well, you can't get a well-groom lawn delivered, but you can get a chicken parmesan delivered. A cabana?

That's a no. But a banana, that's a yes. A nice tan. Sorry. Nope. But a box fan, happily yes. A day of sunshine? No. A box of fine wines?

Yes. Uber Eats can definitely get you that. Get almost, almost anything delivered with Uber Eats. Order now. Alcohol and select markets. Product availability may vary by Regency app for details. With Amex Platinum, access to exclusive Amex pre-sale tickets can score you a spot trackside. So being a fan for life turns into the trip of a lifetime.

That's the powerful backing of Amex. Pre-sale tickets for future events subject to availability and vary by race. conditions apply learn more at mx.ca slash ymex and so we got help and then it turns around fast like faster than it took to get there for sure like we could turn it around fast but I think like the stick it out thing is a a big deal like I think too often and like I'm trying to like teach our kids this in like a little way but like your feelings are valid but that doesn't mean like they're right and you go with it you know what I mean like you can feel something And like, yeah, you feel that, okay.

But, like, that doesn't mean you, like, act on the way you're feeling. Like, if we did that all the time, like, and I feel like not to get, like, overdo it. But, like, I feel like society as a whole, that's kind of the big problem is everybody just does whatever they feel like all the time. And rather than what is right. And there's, and so I think that for us, it's like a big deal of like, okay, if we feel something, like, let's do what we can to, like, validate it and fix it. But that doesn't mean to be, like, change course of action. And, like, it is what, like, we're not going anywhere. So.

Motion should be, like, a signal, not the rudder. That's so good. Yeah. It's not, it's not, it's not, it's not, it's not, it's not, it's not, it's not. That was good. The rudder. No, no, no. That was like a nugget of advice. That was really good. You guys are giving me so much to think about, dude. Y'all are deep, man. I thought we're just going to get in here and giggle, have a good time. Here we are just some deep topics. Oh, man. I think that's, sorry, the, the, on the phases thing, like, Sean, Sean and I are kind of in this right now where I think it's biblical where like the idea of dying to something to allow room for some necessary endings. Yeah. It's like you're in a tough phase. Okay. So what's going to die? And I think that's the beauty of marriage is like that's the constant that ideally never

changes. Right. I think it's the same way. We call it the D word. We don't. You can't ever use it. It doesn't exist. If that's a constant, then it's like, okay, something.

to me needs to die like my expectations for for what this new phase looks like with three kids and my schedule that I was adhering to needs to die you know like whatever it is that's the thing that should change not the marriage yeah that's so good but yeah yeah I think like when you have kids okay so I thought I learned to like die you know like you're saying biblical like die to yourself I thought I learned to die to myself and I got married no I like I really learned how to die to myself in marriage and really just in general when we had our first kid

and I think that's what made it so hard because people always ask oh what was the hardest transition zero to one was the hardest transition of all time like for me personally I think for us yeah for sure

I think we didn't realize how selfish you were honestly no like I don't think anybody does I'm not to you know if every kid I realize it more like I'm still really still like I still like I still like I don't know we'll see it's like yeah it's a definite like dying to self thing but

I feel like I am I feel like I have so much work to do but I feel like I'm such a better person than I was that and like so much happier and fulfilled like serving like serving somebody else serving someone else and not thinking about yourself all the time I say this a lot this is probably an eye roll I apologize but I desperately wish like in the phase of life we are all in right now yeah I desperately wish I could go back to our wedding day yeah and like talk to that person who literally like remember yourself on your wedding day it's comical it's laughable you think you're oh my god I know and then you think you're stressed then like I also just I've said this a million times to you. You also think you're so in love. Yeah. Which you are. But it is, it doesn't even

compare to like the love you feel 10 years into marriage. That's so true. We did our vow renewal last year. We're supposed to do it at 10. Then we did nudes and didn't happen. So then we did it at 11, like so randomly. And it was like on a whim. Our whole family was going to be in Hawaii and six weeks before, we had planned it a year in advance. And six weeks before I looked at him, And I was like, we should do it then, like, while we're there. And so it was like an afterthought. And it was the most meaningful thing we've done. I used a eye roll at that.

I'm like, I don't know that's so dumb, right? Me too. And after doing it, I'm like, everyone needs to do this. Like, you know, like, to your point, you know what you're saying yes to now. Like, you know the kids. You know what it actually means to say yes. And like, for me to confidently say yes to her again in that moment, it's like, it was so cool. Like, I cried way more second time than I did first time.

I'm not going to. lie, it was your guys' vallernoodle that made us say we wanted to do it. You got to do it. I would love to do it at 10 years. You should do it. We'll hold you to that, like, honestly. We said our first set of vows that we said. That was just like a standard set, like,

that we picked for our first, for our wedding day. And we said it again. And it just, like, means so much more. And I just think that, like, the whole thing, like there was no it was not about like which is so cool I like to think my first wedding I say my first wedding sorry babe our first like our wedding day I like to think that like and I did know what I was saying like I did believe like I was meaningful to me then like it's not that

it wasn't you know that's not what you're saying that yeah and it means so much more and like when we it was like there was no pressure no one was there like there were 30 there are 30 close to 30 people like which was huge compared to what it was supposed to be but like people said yes which I think was so special and cool but like it was there was 30 of us there was no pressure there was no I was not nervous to like it was no nerves it was like all exciting and happy and like so meaningful and like nothing our kids were there and they were running around the whole time like I didn't care if there was noise I didn't care if it wasn't perfect it wasn't perfect it was like just real and you guys will get this but it was so cool for our

kids to see right yeah to see that like we value marriage and then like Rhett and Remy are playing like wedding wedding it was cute it's like that's what you want that I got chill like yeah it's wild it was cool but it was like so for you and do it for your kids it was so meaningful to us we're doing it at 20 Dan wants to do it every 10 years I am but I was like there was zero zero pressure it was literally just like this is what it's for like it was really just for us to like feel those words again and feel what it meant again. And, like, it was really cool and really fun. First of all, I've enjoyed every second of this conversation.

It does not feel like it's been long time. I know. I'm just, I could sit here for a long time. I'm curious, when people think Daryl Ann and Daniel, what is the first thing you want them to think of, though? Do you want to answer this? I'll go for it. Again, not to over spiritualize this,

and I talked about this a little bit yesterday, but I was like, I really hope. just through anything we do in any way we get to touch somebody that they feel Jesus in some way my whole prayer is that like through me through nudes it's so silly but like that it would be more of him and less of us and like I think that whether that's them feeling confident and beautiful and like what he's made them to be or whether it's them seeing family and seeing love like whether it's, I don't really want to, and like I'm vocal and honest about my faith. That's not something I hide.

But like, I think we just don't want to, we don't want to preach at people. We want them to see and experience Jesus. Because that's where you're changed. And so whether that's just sitting at dinner and having people over and them just seeing that and feeling like, why is this different? Why is this family different? Like that's what, that's like our whole goal is in everything that we do for people to experience and feel Jesus, not just be told about them.

Because I think a lot, and it's great, but I think a lot of people tell about Jesus but don't act like him and we're just and we're not perfect but we just want people to see that and see like we accept you who you are how you are and whatever that may be my mom's motto has always been like in raising kids and whatever it's like it's in the Bible but it says love covers the multitude of sins and it's like I'm not perfect like I'm so not perfect and like I yell at my kids sometimes and I'm like not perfect but like I pray that like if I can love people well that it'll cover whatever imperfection I have and they'll still see that

through it. So that's like my goal. Wow. I'm excited to be friends with y'all. Same. Same. Same. Same. I'm excited to come down and be a part of the parties that you have or the hosting. Come. Hospitality. Sorry, I got to use the right word. Yeah. Come. I don't know if it's going to rate up to your guys' game nights though.

No, it definitely is not. Our game nights have been on pause for so long. We need to figure out what you have the baby. Yeah. We will fly back out for a game night. That was wild. We wouldn't have bought spoons after your game night. We were like, all right. That one was definitely a hosting night. Yeah.

But it was a fun one. It was a fun one. It was so much fun. Yeah. I mean, you had too many people from too many different walks. I feel like we had to be normal. But it was so fun. When you unpause that, we'll be here.

Okay. Yeah. Our kids would love it too to come. They love. Our kids would love it. Yeah. Let's do it. Thanks for giving us your time.

Oh, yeah, they are. Four, two, two months. They're just turned five and just turn three. Yep. Well, and we'll be five and three in October and July. Okay, yeah. You're close. Oh, yeah.

You're close. Thanks for having this guys. We love you. Thank you, guys. It was so fun. All right.