Couple Things with Shawn and Andrew - 211 | answering inappropriate questions

Episode Date: April 17, 2024

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Wendy's most important deal of the day has a fresh lineup. Pick any two breakfast items for $4. New four-piece French toast sticks, bacon or sausage wrap, biscuit or English muffin sandwiches, small hot coffee, and more. Limited time only at participating Wendy's taxes extra. Honestly, I don't know if I am ready for this. Are you ready for this? Y'all got some weird, very consistent questions. This was our idea to do this episode, though, I guess.

What's up, everybody? Welcome back to A cup of things. A podcast all about couples And the things they go through You forgot a part It is A couple of things with Sean and Andrew Did I really?

We totally did the intro wrong there Try it again What's up everybody Welcome back to a couple things With Sean and Andrew Are you okay Do you say that? You want to try it third thing

What's up everybody Welcome back to a couple things With Sean and Andrew A podcast all about couples And the things they go through Okay this one will be interesting I have yet to look at your guys's comments

but I can probably guess what you guys want to know this is the never TMI styled podcast I'm so confident that we're going to get asked how often and how do we have hunky dory time yeah how naked time with three kids how often do we do the deed

what is it bump cheeks is that the Is that too crappy? Bump cheeks. I'm trying to think of the euphemisms. I'm picturing two butt cheeks bumping. Well, don't think too hard about it. Okay. Does it?

We wanted to do this because you guys ask a lot of questions. And yeah, we, yeah, why not? I don't know. There was a whole podcast called Never TMI. And honestly, Sean and I do. subscribe to the, there is a TMI mindset. So we're going to answer these cordially. Yep.

And with taste. And the Sean and Andrew way. But we did want to answer these because you asked them a lot. And we wanted to be a little bit different than like an ask us anything, Q&A. Yeah. Basically everything we weeded out normally, we just said, whatever, throw them in. Throw them in there. We'll make it interesting.

So there were some wild. ones. Shall we start? And weird ones. Oh wow. Okay. This first one is not what I expected. Yeah. What is the last thing you both cried about? Like both at the same time or just like individually, do you think?

What was the last time we both cried at the same time? Rarely happens. I remember the both the last time we both cried and I remember the last time I cried and then the last time you cried. Okay. The last time we both cried this is being vulnerable i apologize for this we can edit this out later if it's too

vulnerable but you and i were having a really hard time post postpartum trying to understand each other trying to like figure out why we weren't like connecting well and there was arguments and like i think it was just this head of desperation you and i were both crying and i remember We were both crying because I said, I wish we could just call your dad. Yeah. That was when we both cried. I remember that.

Yeah. We've had some really beautiful realizations about marriage recently. Yeah, we have. That Sean and I are each really, well, I'll speak for myself, that I'm, I have a long way to go, as they say.

So do I. A lot of room for improving. movement and it's kind of a refreshing it hurts to get there and realize like dang i'm going to hurt sean but it's also really freeing to know like all right we're going to do it together and we'll figure it out yeah because i can also love her better than anybody else anyway i actually cried this morning with dave wow yeah we had a uh family friend's father died who we had gotten to know pretty well And we just sat and had a good cry, which honestly I'm here for it. It's kind of been like the last 15 months.

I've really embraced just, you know, set a timer, 15 minutes, listen to the sad songs, let the tears out. And then you're like, okay. And I think it was last night. I cried. Last night? Remember at the dining table? We were talking about, was that last night or two nights, two nights ago? I was just talking about raising our kids and I just kept saying like, I don't know what

I'm doing and it's really scary and thinking about like my issues that I've gone through in my life and like how do you not pass those on to your kids parenting yeah parenting is non-stop fun I think we're crying a lot more though 100% um I think that's a lot of it is just out of sleep deprivation or not sleep deprivation exhaustion let me make that you know, distinction. I disagree with you for the cause. Okay.

I think we've kind of just like, we've realized it's kind of good to feel that. And we've been like, quote unquote, tough for so long. Yeah. Like, yeah, it's at a certain point, you have to open up a little bit. And it means a lot more now in this phase of life.

Yeah. Okay. Okay, that was good for one. All right. No, two. We're, were you self-conscious. after having a baby when you're intimate

with your husband? 100%. You're self-conscious? Yeah. Why? I think it's a natural course you go through, but like our bodies do wild things

after having babies. Or having babies. Like, pregnancy and postpartum and like, there's just so much that goes on. on and I think we it's because we live in this culture that like over sexualizes the like vanity of bodies does that make sense that you these doubts creep in postpartum and I'm not feeling great already where it's like is all this mushyness at all attractive what's wild is I've never had

that thought literally not once and I hope that you get to a point where you can be as impressed with your body as I am thank you and while we're waiting for you to get there don't let those self-conscious thoughts be a barrier to love or intimacy and all the definitions of that word. Thank you. You're tracking. Yeah. I love you.

I love you, baby. You're the most beautiful I've ever seen you. And I think it's because I've gotten to know you more. Thank you, baby. And you're also a hot mama. Bump cheeks with you. We're all going to get old and I'm excited. I just kind of want to let it get all wrinkly and saggy and gray.

Yeah. You on board with that? Yeah. Okay. I mean, you know. I was still doing my stuff. Next up, what made us sign up for marriage counseling? There were some, marriage is so interesting.

Because we've been married for eight years. And like, it's a good marriage, right? It's a great marriage. Yeah, I agree. But then there would be certain things that came up that my first thing to think would always be defensive about. She'd be like, I feel like you're doing this. And I'd be like, I'm not doing this.

doing that. Quit saying that. And then at a certain point, I was like, you know what? I actually don't think I have the right perspective to know whether I am doing that or not. And I don't want to do that if it hurt you. So let's try to go to a third party to get it fixed. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. And I would say the same thing was happening for me. I felt like to like zoom out a little bit we had our first kid we went through rough transition figured it out we had our second kid we knew that that was coming so i felt like we were able to navigate it a little better still went through it because the transition is just rough third kid we're like i know this is coming how are we going to navigate it and i feel like we just kind of got to a point in our marriage where the repetition of

disagreements or defensiveness or like it felt too much like deja vu for both of us what I was trying to say wasn't getting across what he was trying to say wasn't getting across and you're so tired by the third kid it's kind of like okay instead of just skirting this issue and waiting for the next round let's just let's go figure it out does that make sense and it wasn't like super bad

I don't mean it that way. It's just like, you can only have the same argument enough times where it's like, let's just go figure out what the issue is. Yeah. I think you said on a previous podcast, we're not in a place of desperation. And so we're getting counseling to keep it that way. Yes. But one thing I've learned is being on the same page emotionally is not an efficient exercise. It takes a long time to figure out what you're feeling individually and then for the other person to try to figure out what they're feeling and then to try to find the right words to communicate that in a way that doesn't get lost in translation.

And it's an inefficient thing that I think pre-kids, Sean and I had the time for to sit down and like have a two and a half hour conversation about, hey, this hurt my feelings. Did you mean that? Can you explain more or whatever? and then you have the first kid you have a little less time second kid a little less time so then things kind of just start stacking you got like stuff that just gets shoved in the closet kind of and so we wanted to invest in like both an expertise and a window of time to work that out and it's been phenomenal and this is another thing I learned I'm going to go on a tangent about I've been thinking about what it means to be a man and what it means to be a man in a marriage. And it's like,

it's not about being perfect. It's not about being perfect. And I think I, I think I would always tell you that I never thought that, but I felt it, right? That you got to show up every day. You got a, you know, happy wife, happy life, and you got to do X, Y, Z. And it's like, no, I'm going to let Sean down. So what does it mean to be a man? If you can't be perfect, okay, that kind of like, That kind of stripped my whole foundation of the understanding when I realized I couldn't be that for her. So now I'm just, I'm shooting for the idea that it is a manly thing to do to have the awareness that I have blind spots that I might not know about

and have the humility to address those blind spots in the best way that I know how. Can I add something? It takes courage. It takes courage and that's what it means to be a man. I love that. You're speaking for yourself, which is wonderful, but I also want to say it's just as much me on every front. I just want to make sure that people listening,

you're painting, I don't want you to paint, I don't want to allow you to paint this picture. Like, it's you that we went to counseling for. I'm glad you said that. It was, I agree. I'm kidding. It's us. And I was noticing within myself, too, that whenever we would have arguments, it's like, why am I reacting this way?

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With its 626 horsepower twin-turbo V8 engine, the Defender Octa is taking on the Dakar rally. The ultimate off-road challenge. Learn more at landrover.ca. Well, what I know is I don't have any control over. I don't have any control over you and I probably shouldn't it's probably healthy for me not to have any control

even though I want to have control and be like just listen to what I say and do what I want you know like that's kind of the instinct it's easier that way that's not how it works and it's not how it should work because the outcome is not as beautiful

as a compromise when we both partake in a decision anyway so I'm trying to control what I can control which is my partake my my are we unloading all of our counseling onto these people right now the uh

Oh, should, I have one more thought. I can't remember. We'll carry on. Okay. Moving on. How do you go from being long distance to being together every day once you get married? Dude, that, do you remember this? Oh, my gosh.

The transitions were always so full of friction for us. Always. Oh, man. When you get used to being independent and living life, your own particular way and you transition to a life where you're merging to people's ways is really difficult. Really difficult. And it take, I would just say practice. Like every single day, take a deep breath, figure out where you're going to compromise,

figure out how you're going to merge. But it can't be your way or it can't be his way. It literally has to be like your combined new lifestyle. And that takes a while to figure out. I agree. I think we really got 100. hung up on like the communicator and emotions communicating our emotions correctly so like a lot of times if I was leaving and I was worked up or vice versa I'd be like well I'm just sad you're leaving

but it came out as like frustration or anger I remember what I was going to say I feel like one thing that I've realized in counseling is when Sean or I get worked up about a thing instead of being frustrated or like taking it personally approaching that with an aspect of curiosity like why does a hotspot exist and let's talk about that well I didn't like that she brought alcohol to our house because my parents were alcoholics strictly example that is a hypothetical example I don't understand what's happening but I get it now yeah you get Okay, sorry. Anyway.

But you're going to do great with the long distance. Yeah. Next question. What's been the hardest part about your marriage the last few months? What do they call, what did that one counselor call it, a baby bomb? Mm-hmm. Yeah, bro, you just got to, I mean, chapters come to a close and the new chapters come about. And it's a non-stop learning process.

I would say not having enough time to figure. everything out between us the baby bomb like your life is so consumed our lives are so consumed right now with a transitioning dynamic within our family kind of like you were alluding to earlier where it's like we might get 20 minutes in a day to really talk and that's you're unloading so many things you want your quality time you want to tell each other oh you accidentally hurt my feelings oh we need to talk about the schedule, oh, I'm actually tired. Do you want to watch a movie? Shoot, I forgot the groceries.

Like, there's just not enough time right now, and that's caused more friction between us. Yeah. But we've thankfully done a better job at saying no, too. So had we not built that practice in, I think we would have hit a hard wall, which we kind of did.

I mean, we... What? Nothing. I was thinking about our date night last night. We tried at a new restaurant. It was a blast. Those Thursday nights are my favorite nights of the week. And I was thinking, you are not, it's like a, I always love you.

Sometimes I'm frustrated with you kind of thing, right? You're not someone that I just never get frustrated with. So there's date nights that come and go where it's like, okay, I'm sometimes more excited about certain date nights than others. But I know that in order for you to be the person that I most enjoy spending time with, I need to spend time with you. I get to spend time with you. That didn't come off like I wanted it to, but what I'm saying is it's a practice and to know

is to love. And I'm just, you got to show up. I will agree to that where we have had date. nights where I trust in a very frustrating not healthy I'm working on this defensive way and like you know what just go hang out with your guys tonight and that's me not doing something healthy and just like pushing you away but it's because of our weekly date nights that we haven't allowed ourselves to get to a place not of no return because we don't believe in that but like that would be cut that would make it very hard to come back from they reconnect us every

week and i think it's beautiful yeah i really enjoy them yeah uh do you schedule sex in the calendar no we put uh we put the 30 second time block in our calendar your mom might listen to this man it's a joke i love those type of jokes i know self-deprecating i know we don't put it in the calendar but we'll kind of talk about it we've done a better job at talking about it like we'll kind of give each other like want want tonight like tonight it's more so instead of scheduling it we try to give each other more notice throughout the day so that we don't miss each other's like cues or bids at night i also think we've we've been doing a better job at subtle key we haven't talked about this but like at noon saying oh my gosh i'm just

so tired tonight yeah or i'm so tired and i'm excited to sleep Yeah. And then that's like, okay, I get it. Yeah. Intentional or not. Like, you know. But part of that exercise is just communicating more. And I was thinking about like how my natural tendency is to only communicate the things that are necessary.

Yes. But I think what's beautiful in like a relationship. I'm talking like if there's a sentence, the one word that summarizes the category of that sentence is, the only thing you find necessary. But what I'm trying to do a better job at is inviting you into the smaller things, including, hey, I'm tired or, hey, you know, like just sharing more. And in that process, there's more intimacy physically and emotionally. Yeah.

Carry on. Interesting. Okay. I'm saying interesting because I just got a peek at a question. I'm very interested. Whatever. Okay. Next up, have any hate comments ever really stuck with you?

Wait, what about the smoother, chunky salsa? Wait, where? Oh, wow. Do you like smoother, chunky salsa? Genuine question. Sorry, it's not juicy. I'll do chunky all day. Dude, anything that's chunky, I like it.

Chunky smoothies. He likes chunky peanut butter. Chunky peanut butter. Dude, it's got to have some texture, you feel me? Chunky smoothies? Did you say that? No, I need my smoothie, like silk. No.

I would say chunky salsa. I like the tomato. I like the onion. I like, you know, I want to taste a little bit of it. And when it looks like they've taken a blender to it, it's kind of like, okay. I love that. Wait. What?

Oh, a blender, like to puree it? Yeah. Okay. By the way, we're having pizza, pool, and film night, the PPP night. Yeah. Film with the pH. And last week we had Mexican food. Yeah.

Are we going to do that same thing tonight? Probably. In order 5,000 different dishes on accident? We have a new standing tradition every Friday night. We have friends over, order food, hang out, go to the kids in the pool, get in the pool with them. Probably no pool tonight, though. It is freezing out. Dude, why is it cold?

It's April now. It's 53 out. I know. Next up. Sex before marriage. What are your opinions on this? have they changed what was my stance

previously I don't know what's your stance now I think we've gotten older I know I will be open here I learned the hard way I would say now if I could go back I would save sex for after

marriage. Why? Because it's not like a thing for me, you know? What? Because I feel like the argument is always like, save the special thing for a special someone.

I don't think, I don't see it as like that special thing for the special someone. I see it as you can never know like the truest form of intimacy like you experience with your spouse does that make sense so I don't care if you have sex before marriage that will never remotely come close

to the intimacy you will feel with your spouse so then why it's very empty before marriage it's not for the right purpose does that make sense I think you teach yourself before marriage if you allow yourself to do that to learn something about

sex and intimacy that is wrong that's false when I say it's not a thing by the way it's not like I'm not saying sex is not a big deal to me I'm saying I don't like your body count or whatever doesn't really factor into my

to my love for you, right? Yeah. I think one thing I've learned more about, and it probably comes with time, maybe age, is like the symbolism of sex and all the things that come with it. Like, it's not...

When you're like a teenager, it's so easy to just make it a physical thing. but it really is so much deeper than that like there's yeah it's i guess i'm saying the same thing you are yeah the uh the depth of intimacy but but also um well go ahead i don't want to interrupt you but people argue today that like sex is really important in a marriage and if you don't have that physical chemistry or if it's not good with whatever I think that's kind of a load of crap I think you're going to know if you have physical chemistry when you're dating and then when you get married I don't think good or bad

exists it's like you figure each other out and that's the important part yes because it involves someone else yeah um i like the question and i think all right another tangent let's just say you're trying to like optimize for the happiest life okay let's just say that's the benchmark that's what you're aiming for okay when i'm 90 and i die i want to have been the happiest that i possibly could have. What does that life entail if you're going to reverse the clock? There's things like don't smoke cigarettes, right? Things like watch your diet, don't need too much sugar, exercise for what is it, 90 minutes a week. And I think, well, this has been interesting to dig into psychology. Forgiveness is a healthy thing that leads to happiness. The neuroscience of it says that. The Bible

aspect, the spirituality of that gives it a little more color than the neuroscience. But I think I think being known and loved, being fully known and fully loved leads to happiness.

Right? And how do you be fully known and be fully loved? I think marriage is a key to that. Right? And there's different shades of it. Like, I know my siblings in ways my parents will never know me. I know my siblings in a way that Sean will never know me. But, like, the full picture, yeah.

I think, I think that's, like, it's optimizing for, what I'm trying to say is, don't smoke cigarettes, okay? Okay. We do have, like, 20 more questions. Do we need to do part two? Or we might just need to, like, make our answers a little more concise. Have any hate comments ever really stuck with you? You know, we're talking about,

we're about to have Pastor Whitehead on our show who wrote a book called The Digital Fast. I am, we were talking about our habits of phone usage, screen time, social media. I don't, I have a pretty healthy relationship with social media, which I'm happy to say. I also could be wrong, but I actually don't scroll much.

ever since we went to Instagram headquarters in like 2018 and we sat down with the person there and they said make sure that you're creating on the platform more than you're consuming on the platform that like really changed I love making videos and publishing them I love the community aspect

but I don't I don't often actually just sorry but I don't read all the DMs or the comments that's what I do yeah I read all the the comments and the DMs but I say no the fact that i can't think of one right now means that it hasn't stuck with me they have affected me in the moment um but no not really stuck with me next up do you go to the bathroom or

fart in front of your spouse comfortably no i don't i used to think that was the standard of like oh i can't wait till she gets a point where she's so comfortable to do that uh i like not doing that around you. Yeah, and I think I do, I did, I do. You do. You do. You do. But I think I'm getting to the point where I actually like, I want you to have the best image of me as possible. And I think there's an effort involved in that, including not farting. Wow. It doesn't bother me. There is a book called 30 Lessons on Loving by Carl Pillimer. We got to interview them. And that's one of the things that one of the old people said is like, don't break wind and always dress well in front of your spouse because you want them to think think of you well but to answer

question yes I do you want to do like two more how do you know this are we all the way we're not that deep into okay okay we gotta get through these question for you Sean have you ever gotten a Brazilian wax or laser hair removal is this weird to answer Brazilian wax is the whole kitten caboodle why would that be weird I don't know is this like a is this a girl asking I think it's, I think it's weirder to get one. Like, it's a weirder experience to get one than to say you got one. Oh, yeah, for sure. You've gotten one?

Yeah. Okay. Both. Like, yeah, I imagine it's somewhat uncomfortable to have wax poured all over your hoochie mamas. It is. Yeah. It doesn't feel good. Yeah, there's like a...

I also did it pregnant as well, and that scarred me. Why'd you do... Oh, I love you said that. It scarred me. One, because everything hurts so much worse when you're pregnant. Wow. So much worse. So, yeah.

Why did you do that? Because I couldn't comfortably take care of it on my own. Logistically couldn't read. Logistically. You know, I don't mind like a little. No. I do. Okay.

I do. All right. What? Oh my gosh. I cannot believe you just... What about laser hair removal, though? Yeah, I did it. You did? Yeah, I didn't work.

I've heard that about laser hair removal. I also, like, did laser hair removal, like, really early on when it was, like, new, so I don't think it was, like, the most efficient process back then. Well, they've improved it. Yeah. I have a buddy who's extremely hairy, like, the whole, his whole back, and he's gotten laser hair removal multiple times, has not worked. Anyway, what's the most out-of-pocket place you've had sexy time?

Thinking of a couple. Say it on three. One, two, three. Beach. I don't know if that's like out-of-pocket, but like... Well, the context is, and we can keep that between us. Yeah. All right.

Has Andrew ever purchased your feminine products at the store? Yes. Yes. Not consistently, but yes. Yeah, I don't have, I don't really have a thing. No. You're probably going to have to for our daughter someday, so. Hmm.

I haven't had that talk. I think the, the, the, you shouldn't be raised in a household as a girl where it's like, don't talk about it. Don't, like, you need to hide it. otherwise that just makes an unhealthy relationship about health with a girl

but there is a right way to talk about it and a wrong way to talk about it for sure but like our boys need to be aware of it our boys need to be respectful of girls' health and like yeah it should be like this is a necessary item

yeah whatever does anything really give you the ick like gross you out not really I don't know what in to what context this question is referring to there was a cockroach in our house

the other day I don't really enjoy excuse me it was a while ago I don't really enjoy those animals creatures I should say I don't I don't even mind spiders I think snakes are cool Is this the one you found a laundry room

like a long time ago Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah I've got to call the bug guy But not really I mean now we've had poop on our hands So many times because of kids Throw up everywhere You are way more icky than me

As far as getting icked out Yeah So say what do you got I don't I can't I don't like buggers That's probably the worst Okay How long did your honeymoon phase last in your marriage Um

How long were we in Oakland? From April to July A couple months Yeah It was just you Yeah but that's it I'll take that

That was good And then Sean went on tour And that was that And Andrew Boundstrom Became an Uber driver how do you express to your spouse you want to be intimate do you just say it or do you have a code word do you drop hints all day we've been just saying it kind of i'd say we do all of that it depends

on the day it's like there's never like code word but we'll be sly we'll hint at it we'll i do i do think however you do it it's important for you to like communicate the ask and not just assume the other person is on the same page. Yeah. You feel me? Yeah. Because not everybody's

appetite is the same, you know? Mm-hmm. What's the grossest part of pregnancy? The sweat. Well, that's not my question to answer. Yeah. Thank you. But I'll say this.

The Foley bulb for me was uncomfortable. for you. Did you watch it? I didn't like watch the whole process but they were like throw your knees out and like put your feet together you remember that?

Oh. And then so... Are you scarred by that image? I just felt bad. Maybe that wasn't gross but I was like... I don't know. It does get gory at the end

like when they pull you off the operating table. But it's digestible. Yeah. Just like... just like the placenta digestible that weird some people are into that

yeah it doesn't bother me did we do that yeah we didn't we almost did we should just throw that baby on the grill you wouldn't have I would have we could just kind of that's not a you thing

cook it medium rare on the on the Trager gross um is that most embarrassing moment as a couple oh

I got it college oh wow what are you thinking of just give me one word and I'll know Matt oh yeah

yeah we got caught guys but we didn't know it we had a roommate at the time who we thought was out of town we thought he was out of town but he evidently came home

in the middle of the night and our door was wide open he just went about his business being retired professional athletes what's something you do not miss about sports life I don't miss when you had sore ankles or knees or a back

and you had to go out to practice today and the next day and the next day and every day for four months and you couldn't take a day off And then the injury and pain just compound. Now it's like, oh, my knees in tough shape. I'm going to not do anything for three days. And then it heals and then you're like, good to go.

Yeah. Oh, dude, you would just feel terrible. My feet would freaking kill me. Achilles and IT bands. My lower back was effed. I would say the same thing. Just like the sacrificing your long-term health for that momentary success.

Oh, you think you actually sacrificed long-term help? I'm just thinking like the short-term comfort. And by short-term, I'm saying like three to five months, it's like pain a lot. I don't know. Maybe it is long-term. Maybe it's not. I don't know, but that. You think you shortened your lifespan

by being a gymnast? No, but I think I might have shortened the lifespan of my meniscus, you know, or my, like, whatever it was hurting. It's like... You're really functional now, though. I know, but... I'm 12 years out?

But I'm also, like, been told I should never run long distance. Well, that was because you tore your knee skiing. I'm just saying, I think there could have been things in gymnastics where it's like, I pushed through fractures or sprains or like, I think what, I think we're saying the same thing. It's like you're prioritizing your instant success over like, like, like, you're, you're, you're, success over like you said i have a stress fracture in my shin i should probably i should actually

rest for three months and not keep tumbling on this yeah you were way tougher than i was now i want to look up football players aside ct the whole thing uh what is the lifespan of a professional athlete in all categories versus non professional athletes yeah carrying on what's the grossest part no Oh, sorry. Do you have any silly names for each other? I call Andrew Bro. I call Sean Bug. We have done that since we started dating.

It's on our wedding book. What was that book? It's like, were people signed? Yeah, our guest book? The guest book, yeah. I called him Bro. That was his nickname on the football team, was literally bro. And I didn't want to, like, have a cutesy baby name for you in front of.

I was surrounded by football players all the time. And I didn't want to be like, hey, sugarplom. My nickname in college was bro. Mm-hmm. But I was all with the football guys. So when Sean started calling it, she was like the only girl. It was great. It's endearing.

It's good memes. You're a bug because you gave me that name. You said that's what some people used to call you. No, I think you called me that because I was literally a bug. I did? I did not come up with the name. I think you did. No, a bug would not be.

I had never called myself or been called. bug I'm glad we're talking about this now I know I'm literally do we need to

come up with the new one I call her boo-thang you do call me boo-thang a lot

or oh shoot wait what's the Russian word for for grandma but it's

a you know I'm talking about shoot I think it's S-H no oh my gosh babushka babushka babushka babushka

okay funny babushka boo thing um next do you ever cuss in front of each other or make raunchy jokes Sean's way more of raunchy jokes fan than I am yeah and we don't cuss that much yes yes yes but not often we have cuss in front of each other but it's not part of our like language we're not really cussers no have you ever dealt with depression how did you

Yeah, okay, we have 10 questions. Do you think we can get through these? I don't know how long we've been going for. I don't think. Are you also, is anybody out there? Is anyone still listening? Are you guys there? We got this.

Let's just keep going. Have we ever dealt with depression? How we get out of it? We are going to do an episode about postpartum depression where I think we can get into this a little bit more. Give us a little time. Give us a little time. Yeah.

I have dealt with some like depression early on, like in the transition of athletics. outside of it how did I get through it this is guys I will go way more into depth this but um community asking for professional help asking for help from

your close community your parents your friends and having like accountability people around you to make sure you're like you're having your check-ins and making sure you're like getting progressively better wow the answer from my standpoint

I don't know if I've ever had depression, but I was just looking up how many people have diagnosed depression and it says about 280 million people worldwide which is about 5% of the world's adults have it. I feel like a lot of people say I'm depressed and it's not diagnosed. Not you in particular.

Correct. Yeah. I think I have more struggled with like anxiety, not in yeah football days that's what i don't miss about sports either is like no i actually do miss that yeah the freaking having the moment be in front of you being a little intimidated by it but freaking stepping up not being able to sleep for weeks on end just something impending well i have okay so funny story about cussing and sports i long snapped for 20 years of my life never had any mental like yep mental yet

show up in Kansas City, signed with the chiefs. They said, Andrew, this is your job to lose. And I lost it. No pressure. But I lost it mentally. So much so that we would do these team meetings with like Andy Reed, the head coach

and all the 100 players and all the coaches. He would walk in the room, everyone's quiet. And I've never felt this in my life. I would have to physically bite my tongue to prevent myself from blurting out the F word, which I never say the F word. it was the most of dude

you were a psyched out yeah I was a mess carrying on next thing how are you thinking about adoption soon

no not soon great not soon we got to settle in yeah uh how do

my gosh here we go how do you spice up naked time oh my gosh and make it new we always talk about things but never

implement i think it's all right talking about it's half the fun we just kind of go with the flow man yeah i wouldn't say like i wouldn't say incredibly spicy is is important to me i think it depends on your definition of spicy you know the person asking the question yeah is what i mean at Tim's. No powders, no blenders, no shakers. Starting at 17 grams per medium latte, Tim's new protein lattes, protein without all the work, at participating restaurants in Canada.

Summer's here, and you can now get almost anything you need for your sunny days delivered with Uber Eats. What do we mean by almost? Well, you can't get a well-groom lawn delivered, but you can get a chicken parmesan delivered. A cabana? That's a no, but a banana, that's a yes. A nice tan, sorry, nope. But a box fan, happily yes.

sunshine no a box of fine wines yes uber eats can definitely get you that get almost almost anything delivered with uber eats order now alcohol and select markets product availability may vary by regency app for details this is an interesting topic to me because i i know some people have like the range of interest in this area seems to be never-ending and very broad yeah and i don't really empathize with that you know i'm not like i just you know let's do the thing and there's it doesn't need to be orchestrated or like performative for me yeah i just want to cuddle with you do the thing take about 30 seconds doing oh my gosh okay feel free to say your side of the story though I was trying to think of an analogy

So we don't have to get into Like details here, but I don't have to get into like details here. C.S. Lewis, one of my favorite authors, said that sexual appetite, unlike hunger appetite, doesn't get satiated when you perform the act. it actually grows and become like when you when you entertain oh i don't know i i don't

i don't freaking this doesn't speak to me the question of spice so i would say this i think we are very spicy together there you go i agree i like our spice i like our spice i like our spice we are the perfect spice it's like a fine dining spice all right okay The first poop after having a baby is it as scary as it seems. That's freaking hilarious. Yes. What? It's absolutely terrifying.

Tell me more. You literally have, well, for my experience, I have sutures 10 layers deep. Okay. So it's not scary in like the, it's like gory way. No. Okay. It's scary in the sense of like a baby has exited you one of two ways. Using any internal strength to exit something else from your body, you have this immense fear that you're going to do more damage.

Does that make sense? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I get that. So, like, it is scary. Do you think she, is that a funny question? Is it okay?

I laughed. Yeah. Okay. Okay. But you'll get through it, though, right? You'll get through it. It's fine. Did you specifically try for a boy or girl, different positions for each one?

Yes. After we had Drew, I said, all right, we're going to have one or two more kids after this. Did it work? We don't know. They say They say for those listening Stop, don't, don't Hit it from the back

Andrew And it'll be a boy Andrew Oh my gosh What do you want? What do you want? I feel like this is common knowledge Okay

Don't Google it though You don't know what's going to pop up Next pet peeve about oh the other person we used to love this question this was the question we asked every couple we interviewed for the first 50 episodes all right i got it go ahead i that you do this thing and i don't even it's endearing and cute but also kind of a pet peeve i don't know if it's in the middle the night or like late at night or early in the morning, at some point in the day, you sneak chocolate treats

from the pantry, but you leave the wrappers on the counter. Okay. And I'd be like, well, you had like a Reese's last night, evidently. You leave the empty wrapper there as evidence. That's funny. all right we've addressed this issue so i feel like i can bring it up it is a pet peeve of mine when sean will order food or pick up food or make food without even asking i just want a symbolic

ask to say i'm thinking of you andrew you might need some calories so when when like uber eats shows up and it's a bagel sandwich one you know i'm a girl i'm a girl man, I'll take care of myself is more of the thought. You know what's funny, though, is 99% of the time it's a breakfast and you don't eat breakfast. I still want this. You still want me to ask. So you can still say no.

I get it. I get it. All right. Have you both tried breast milk? I have made a breast milk latte. We should bring that video back. A little bitter for my taste. Don't know if I'd recommend it.

I don't think Starbucks will be coming out with a breast milk latte anytime soon. don't think it has a wide population that would be interested in it. I haven't like taken a bottle and tried it to like try breast milk but the amount of times I've like carried a bottle around in my mouth or something

because my hands are full or I've definitely like ingested breast milk. Is it feasible to like... Oh my gosh. Could you? Yes, I could. No, I, you could probably like squirt. You could

squirt it pretty far so you're probably like aim and squirt could be worth a try I was telling Sean we went to dinner last night at day night and I peed is this too much to share oh my gosh bathroom was like seven feet wide no this will probably make people mad at you it was very clean operation I you know how like people you'll pour a glass of water and pour one into the other and gradually increased a distance.

He started peeing and wanted to see how far you can make it. And I made it touch my back to the wall and brought it all the way back. You are such a man. I don't know what, oh, the breast. Okay, next question. How do you navigate bad mental health days with each other? We talk about it. I think we try to be pretty open with it.

I think this is, yes, I agree. We've done a better job with that. I also think this is where, like, faith. helps. I think it reduces the volatility and it also gives you kind of a solution

or a tool to navigate. Okay. We got to wrap this sucker up. Did you deal with pressure from your family members about having, or do you,

did you deal with family members? Wow. Did you deal with pressure from family members about having another baby? I think the pressure from my family now is like stop having more kids.

Really? probably i would say no we didn't tell like that no no we didn't but yeah last question andrew did anything shock you with pregnancy and birth i feel you kind of hit on that already but the gross um no sean was a freaking champ dude you were a chant bro uh you know what Look, you kind of get, the first trimester, Sean's itch itch. For what? You're ready to throw down, you know what I'm saying? And then you go through the desert.

And it's a stark contrast, you know? You reach the highest, the highs, and the lowest, the lowest. It's not the lowest of lowest. But you crushed it. No, nothing was shocking. That's shocking to you. that's not even irrelevant it's okay

I like how we do that do what the desert did pregnancy yeah and I like how we did that episode listen if you made it this far subscribe okay you made it this far

I don't even know how long we've been going I don't either on YouTube there's a subscribe button on Apple Podcast There's a follow button. Spotify. What is it on Spotify? Do you even listen to a podcast? I don't. Whatever you do on Spotify, do that.

And then we'll see you next week. Yeah. That's all we got. That was fun. Thank you for submitting all of these, never team eyes. Y'all are, I mean, the internet is just. It's wild.

In one word, if I could describe it, would just be sex. That's the internet? Yeah, like, that's what people are interested in you know wow we should work on that anyway thanks guys i'm andrew and Sean out