Couple Things with Shawn and Andrew - 72 Red, Yellow and Green flags

Episode Date: June 30, 2021

This week on Couple Things, we had a lot of fun talking about some things that could be red flags or dealbreakers. We went to Instagram to hear what you guys think are some red flags in dating and relationships...and we dove in. Here are some of the topics that we cover: Your red flags from Instagram Complicated relationship with their family If they are divorced If their parents don't like you or approve of you If they don't text or respond back right away They are friends with their exes If they call all of their exes crazy Their best friend is of the opposite sex If it's long-distance If they want to spend all of their time with you If you haven’t yet, please rate Couple Things and subscribe to hear more. Follow us on Instagram to keep the conversation going at https://www.instagram.com/couplething... And if you have suggestions/recommendations for the show, send us your ideas in a video format – we might just choose yours! Email us at [e-mail]. Subscribe for more! ▶ http://bit.ly/3rnOdNo We're supported by the following company that we love! Check them out below: Upward ▶ Upward is a free dating app where Christian singles can connect and create a meaningful, faith-first relationship. And they understand that the Christain community is full of diverse identities, denominations, and levels of faith. Download it today for free! SLINGTV ▶ Take control of your TV experience today and get your first month for just $10 by going to SlingTV.com/EASTFAM FAN MAIL ADDRESS: Shawn and Andrew East 750 N San Vicente Blvd., East Tower, 11th Floor, Los Angles, CA 90069 Follow My Instagram ▶ http://www.instagram.com/ShawnJohnson Like the Facebook page! ▶ http://www.facebook.com/ShawnJohnson Follow My Twitter ▶ http://www.twitter.com/ShawnJohnson Snapchat! ▶ @ShawneyJ Follow AndrewsTwitter ▶ http://www.twitter.com/AndrewDEast Follow My Instagram ▶ http://www.instagram.com/AndrewDEast Like the Facebook page! ▶ http://www.facebook.com/AndrewDEast Snapchat! ▶ @AndrewDEast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Do that, though? When you go into the dating world or you go into marriage or you go into relationships of any kind with this set standard of this is the person I'm looking for, you're not open-minded enough to true love. What's up, everybody? Welcome back to a couple things. With Sean and Andrew. A podcast all about couples. And the things they go through. Today was a fun one. We did red, yellow, and green flags when it comes to relationships. relationships and dating.

Yeah. So we did an episode not too long ago called deal breakers. There was a lot of intrigue around that. This is a similar concept except we splice out whether it's a full stop. You're ending any more communication with them romantically or it's a maybe you got to work through some details or if it's not a problem at all. And all of these red yellow green flags. So red being like full stop, yellow being like, I'm not sure I may fill it out and green being like

that's a good sign. Yeah. All of these came from you guys. We asked on Instagram, we asked on YouTube, and you, you did not disappoint. Let's just say that. There were some surprising ones, to say the least. Yes, it does a lot about you. But before we get started, we do have Comment of the Week.

That's right. Thank you for continuing to comment, mostly on YouTube videos and the podcast reviews. It looks like, I did the second one on purpose. The first one was not. But a lot of people love the communication episode we did. So maybe we should revisit that. Great. But this week's comment on the week is from Tina regarding the Teddy and Edwin episode we did.

Okay. She says, Edwin, praise hands, praise hands, praise hands. He needs to go on tour and preach. And Camden says that she instantly clicked. So it looks like we have some Teddy and Edwin fans out there. Definitely. I went into the interview completely, I don't want to say oblivious to like controversy, I guess. Yeah.

But I was very pleasantly surprised. They have, they had a lot of great things. to say. Yeah. And we're excited about this episode. So before jump into it, please subscribe, give it a rating on whatever platform you're listening on. And without further ado, we bring you the red, yellow, and green flag episode. Here we go. So today's episode. Yeah. I'm excited about. Me too, because I read through a lot of these and they got me thinking. First, I want to say we have talked to so many incredible couples who lead their relationships completely different from one another. so that goes without saying when we're talking about red or green yellow and red excuse me yes flags

take that with a grain of salt a lot of them are and should be just straight up red flags for everybody i'm just going off of what i read so far okay um but a lot of them are up for interpretation i think something that we have learned some wisdom that we have gained from a lot of these couples is that when you go into the dating world or you go into marriage or you go into relationships of any kind with this set standard of this is the person I'm looking for, you're not open-minded enough to true love. And if you go in with your checklist of he or she needs to look like this, act like this, be like this, and this is the person, then you're probably going to be looking for a very long time. And even if you come across that person, you'll probably find flaws.

Wait, hold up, though. I am in favor of creating a list, though. You definitely need to have some idea of what you're looking for or else you just stumble into. randomness. I agree and disagree. You need to have, I think having a vision for what you're looking for or a list, like an idea, but then being flexible with that. I think he should be very flexible because think about there are a lot of people out there that we know, a lot of friends that we know even, that will go into a bar or a gym or a class or someplace looking to meet someone and they're so close-minded of this is the type of person I'm looking for, that they pass up some awesome, awesome people that could actually be someone that they marry

and spend the rest of their life with. No doubt. But. Because I will say going into dating you, I had a list. Okay, Sean. No, no. All right. Okay.

Well, just because I didn't meet any of those criteria, babe. No, but I will say I was very close-minded in dating for a long time. where I had such a specific list that even when I first met you, I thought you were incredible, but I was like, oh, he doesn't have X, Y, and Z. Was it, no tattoos that did it for you?

Hold on loosely is the phrase that is coming to mind. Like, like, you know, you got to have an idea, but just be willing to play. For sure. And don't shut the door on anybody from a first impression. Okay, yeah. And we'll talk through the first impression. So this will be somewhat similar to the deal breakers episode we did.

but maybe a little more situational and ideas from the crowd as well. So we'll expand on that. But I also am excited about this because we just found this board game. Sean and I are huge gamers. It's called Red Flag. Yeah. And it presents situations. It's got like Apples to Apples Version of Relationships.

Anyway, it's hilarious. So anyway, are you ready to dig in? Yeah, I want to start on Instagram. Okay, we'll start with Instagram. We're going to rapid fire. These are red flags. I asked you guys, I said, what are red flags when it comes to date? dating. And here are a lot of them. Ready?

Um, yeah. Within like the first 10, five of them are exactly the same, which is shocking. I'm interested. Which is they're rude to wait staff. Treating servers rudely, short temper, being rude to staff or anyone just trying to do their job. Yes, I think that is a massive red flag. How someone treats someone else, a stranger, I think shows a lot about their core values. Now, not to be too nuanced, but. You're standard for rudeness. I'm just saying there's been a lot of rifts between you and I, because you have different social norms than I do.

Oh, I am hyper sensitive to everybody around me. You better lock eyes. You better acknowledge in the second they get to the table. But you're not conversational. No, but I'm here. And I take that as rude. So, but you're not being rude. It's just, you know what I'm saying?

Okay. We're getting too nuanced. If you're rude to servers, that's a red flag. I agree. Smoking. Really? Yeah. Okay, I think it depends on the person, right?

Yeah, I would generally say it's probably not healthy. Well, that's fine, but I'm not, I'm not going to play devil's advocate. We'll just roll through this. Let's just roll through this. Someone's had a horrible family. Okay, we're going to dive into that later. That's, if they talk to their mom disrespectfully, if he or she avoids introducing you to their friends. We will dive into that.

That is, that is actually very insightful. Who said that? Emily Sigmund. Emily, I agree with you on that. Someone who does not believe in God. We talked about that with deal breakers about like religious differences. Yeah. Saying the L word too early seems a little specific.

Might need to open that up a little bit. Actions don't line up with words. I would agree with that. Honestly, these are tough though, babe. Because like that everybody's like, like, Like, you know, everybody crosses that line. I can't hold that standard all the time. If they don't want to see your family and friends.

If they're too touchy before they even go on a date with, well, I agree with that one. Yeah. Jealousy. If they ever ghost you, drugs and alcohol abuse, codependency, anger issues, family dynamics. Hmm. When a guy or girl stays friends with all of their exes. Interesting. Men who have beds without headboards.

Hold up. Okay. That's my style for sure. I wonder why that's a red flag. I don't know. How about people being late? I need to think about that for a second. Hold on.

I need to try to figure out what they're, why. Who said that? We can't call them out. The men who have beds with a head. That's not personal. Let's just say her name is cat. Okay. Interesting.

I would disagree with that cat. I think that's being a little too specific. People being late to the first date. want some media access to your phone and social media. Yeah, trust issues. Anyways, do I keep going? White lies. Okay.

Always putting people down. They dismiss small boundaries you set, making you change yourself or how you grew up. Let me just interject here. I think we're good. It is interesting that a lot of these things I'm having trouble with because I'm thinking about our relationship, how I've not always acted as I've said I would.

and what a harsh standard that is. But when you are dating, I think you should have a harsher standard. And then when you're locked into a commitment like marriage, then that's where you need to have patience and grace for others. You know what I'm saying? I agree. I agree with that.

However, I do think when you're dating, going back to what I said earlier, you will blow off a lot of incredible people that you could have a very strong chemistry with just by a first impression. Now, I'm not saying like, If you go on a date with someone and they're super rude to a server that you should continue that relationship. But if you go on a date with someone and you end up at their apartment and you notice that they don't have a headboard, I don't think that constitutes being like, I'm not going to call you again.

I actually do that though, being honest with something like that if Kat said that, like if she's on a date, she goes and sees that this guy doesn't have a headboard. Actually sharing that in a lighthearted way could actually be a great like bonding moment for the relationship because that guy would be like, wait, what? Are you talking and like laugh about it. I agree with that. And I think that approach with deeper issues or other issues is actually a good way to like go about it. Like, hey, whatever, just being honest with what you're looking for or what you think is a red flag. Yeah. It's interesting because it's so, it's so nuanced.

It is. There's a lot to it. And I'm curious. I'm curious about the headboard thing in particular. But let's get to our list. Okay. So we compiled a list of some of like the biggest ones that we saw. Yeah.

Um, that were truly red flags for a lot of you, but we're going to go through and kind of sort through whether we think it's like a green, yellow, or red. And why? Because I would say we see this with a lot of people, even like a lot of our friends. Yeah. And it just, it sparks conversation. So the first one is the party that you're interested in has a complicated relationship with their family. That, that does make things tough. I'll say this. In Laws, as we learned from Dr. Pilamer. Yes. In-laws can make things very difficult.

Yes. Right? Yes. However, I will plant my flag in the sand right now and say that I think that might, that should be a yellow. Is that the, is it, plant my flag in the sand or draw a line in the sand? Plant my flag. And then end it there.

Go ahead. I should be a yellow. I'll wave my flag. Whatever. I agree. I think it should be yellow. Okay. I don't think.

it should be a red because examples that we were given for complicated family relationship is the parents might be divorced they are divorced themselves um you might not get along with one of the in-laws or your mom or dad you might not have spoken to them for a couple years you might have a crazy aunt all of these examples are um things that you guys said but i think that's all yellow because that's not the person right and what if they're what if the family relationships are complicated because the parents did drugs and the kid didn't want to. And now they don't talk. Yeah. Right. I do think when it comes to family, yes, if that's complicated, it can bring baggage. It can bring trauma. It can make your relationship with that potential family

more complicated and more difficult. But it doesn't mean that you can't still make it work and it be a beautiful thing. I was thinking about this. I actually think about this a lot. the patterns of pre of like the history of a person say there's a friend which we have plenty of friends who just can't have a roommate because it always ends in a disaster and it's always oh my gosh my my roommate did this and now I got to move out and then they move into a new roommate situation and they're like oh my gosh that ended three months later because they did this at some point you have to run it through the filter of hey maybe the problem is not all of these other roommates that you're like being so dramatic about and pointing out their issues.

Maybe the problem is actually you. You know what I'm saying? Like if you continue to have, if you have this whole breadcrumb trail of broken relationships. Yeah. And you keep blaming on other people. Maybe it's time to do some self-eval is how I feel. So if this person who has a complicated family history has a ton of healthy friendship

relationships, I would say, you know what? There's something deeper there as to why the family relationship is complicated. Yeah. But if all of their relationships are complicated, then that might be a red flag. Anyway. I do want to go on to the nuance to like asterisk under complicated family.

Hypothetically speaking, the person you're dating or you're interested in is divorced. I think that constitutes a yellow flag. I don't think that's a red flag either. Oh, 100% agree. I agree. But if you were to meet someone and them say, I am divorced, I've been married before. Are you asking me as a married man to you actually? if I'm theoretically dating somebody else.

Yes. Okay, continue with the hypothetical. I think a lot of people would run from that. And I think, again, going back to open-mindedness, you have to give someone the benefit of the doubt and say, you know what, no matter the issue, people are capable of evolving and learning and growing as human beings. So I'm going to give them a shot.

I mean, the context matters so much. If we're talking about like a 19-year-old. who's been divorced already, that's different than if it's someone who's like 40 and we used to be married and they lost their spouse due to X, Y, and Z. I'm just saying, why would the 19 year old be any different? It's just different. It's like, it just is. The context matters is my point. I'm just saying, I think divorced, whether you believe in it or not, it should be a yellow flag. I'm not saying it's a red flag. No, I'm just, I'm just saying I think it should be yellow. Okay. Let's continue.

The next one that we saw from you guys was their parents don't like you or approve of you. We have plenty of friends who don't get along with the in-laws. I don't know why I'm going to say this, but I feel like that's a red flag. I'm pretty much in agreement with that. Because I don't think that's a complicated relationship with the family. I think that is, I think that will make your relationship very difficult. do you feel like the old saying of you end up marrying your spouse's parents like when I was getting married they said you're gonna you end up marrying Sean's mom is kind of like the situation

both because you will evolve to be more like her yeah even though you seem drastically different now as you age and go through different phases like parenting ultimately like you end up very much like your parents I think I think yes and no I think everybody is their own person. Sure. And I think especially when you get married and you grow in a world right now that is so, I don't know,

I feel like back in the day, people were so isolated within their communities and their families. We didn't communicate with the entire world on a daily basis, on a minute by minute basis with social media. So instead of only being influenced by our family, right.

As history was, pretty much, we are influenced by the entire world. option every single day of saying do I want to be more like her or him or do I like it's just different I think we evolve into more different people today but it's almost the fact that we're we have so many millions of potential influences ultimately I feel like pushes back to the immediate influences of our parents it might but I also I just I just think there's more there's more change now than there ever has been so i bring that up though because if their parents don't get along with you i think that ultimately down the road they as they become more like their parents

whatever features made their parents not like you will make them not like you as as as much as i hate to say that and that i feel like just sets you up for a very rough go yeah it changes like the support of your parents when we had a kid was drafted like it changed us in a positive way. And without that support, I just feel like I'm a big fan of being able to get the extended family together and everybody get along. Yes.

I will say on a side note, this just is a thought that came up with this. Something that we learned in premarital counseling, or it was like a piece of advice that our counselor gave us, was, and this is something interesting to think about, your parents at the end of the day will always take your side. always no matter how much they love your spouse or they love the person you're dating even if they are best friends they will always take your side parents do so remember that never bad talk

your spouse to your family yeah wow that it that that has hit me so many times over the year since we first heard that for sure where it's so easy to you know when it's just you and your parents and your spouse isn't there to be like when they ask how are things going you start divulging all of the negative things like oh gosh Sean is just she's so X Y and Z hypothetical if there was anything wrong with you and then what happens is they become your yes man your parents do and they're like then they start seeing that flaw and they have less patience for it and then they talk to you about it and you have and it's just like this this negative snowball so protect your relationship with your spouse over anything and be cautious.

This sounds dramatic, but protect your spouse from your family. Yeah. Not in a bad way, but they will always take your side. That's deep. That's one of the top three takeaways from our premarital counseling. I know. Next topic, though. This was a big red flag for a lot of people.

Is it a green, yellow, a red flag if the sigo doesn't text back or respond right away? It's a green flag. It doesn't affect. I don't think so. Should not affect how you perceive. I think that is very nuanced. I think that's very situational. And if that is your preference,

I think that is, if you need someone to give you that validation of an immediate response, don't take this offensively, if that's the type of person you are, but have a little self-reflection there of why do you need that? Is it because you lack trust? Is it because you worry? Is it like,

what is that foundational reason? I've noticed in myself before, like, oh, you might be flying home and I text you and I don't get a response when I know you should have landed. And it's like, oh, my gosh, did your plane crash? Are you delay? Like, what's going on? And that's just, that's on me. That's not on you.

What does he jump to the worst case scenario of, oh, Andrew didn't text me back. He's probably in a plane crash. Yes. I think, here's my thoughts on this. You got to decide what's important and what's not important. and that ability to do so applies for every phase and every area of life. Yeah. And also, you have to realize what your tendency of thinking relationship is and what a

healthy relationship actually looks like. And if your tendency is to think that, oh, relationship means texting 24-7 and that's your style, that might not be healthy, right? There's stylistic differences and then there's unhealthy differences. And you have to decide the two is what I'm saying. So that's what I'll say. Okay, next one. They are friends with their exes.

Is that a green, yellow, or red flag? I actually don't really care about this one. I don't. I would say yellow. I think it's situational. And yeah. My style is, if you're hanging out one-on-one with one of your exes, I'm out. Yeah.

But if you're just like, you bump into them and you're friendly, fine. Yeah. All right, let me adjust. I'm not going to let you continue it like an intimate relationship. And I'm not talking like physically, but you're not going to, go to coffee dates with your ex. Yeah. Is not my style.

Yeah. Wendy's most important deal of the day has a fresh lineup. Pick any two breakfast items for $4. New four-piece French toast sticks, bacon or sausage wrap, biscuit or English muffin sandwiches, small hot coffee, and more. Limited time only at participating Wendy's taxes extra. I would do the same thing. This is so interesting.

Now I'm feeling like an oppressive husband. I will give you an... It's just etiquette. constructive criticism. In the words you chose to use right there, I'm not going to let you continue that relation to him and go have a copy. Choice words there. Yeah, I feel that.

But no, I agree. I think you have to be very careful. I think as a human being, putting yourself into those situations where you've had, I don't want to say like an intimate relationship, but like a vulnerable relationship with someone, you have to be very careful what situations you continue to put yourself in.

Because the human heart is the human heart and you have feelings and you have relationships with people and those don't just turn off. So protecting your spouse that way. So not stoking the flame. No. Not allowing that to grow. Yeah.

That's wise. Like you said, if you're in a group setting and your exes are there or your ex is there, fine. But yeah, let's maybe not go on coffee dates. What if, babe, they call all of their exes crazy, though? I think that is a defense mechanism. But also, we've talked about this in previous episodes, like, own your stuff.

Yeah. If you truly believe you've only dated crazy people, we should work on that. We should figure out why. If you're just saying it because you don't want to own why it didn't work out, let's start there. What do you think? Yeah, this goes back to what I was talking about. earlier like the patterns oh if if you're in a bunch of these volatile relationships where it ends and you know windows breaking and yeah stuff being thrown on the street is it and that's there's multiple

of those is it the other people's fault or is it yours just do some eval yeah is how I feel um the next one they have a best friend that is of the opposite sex I'd say yellow are all these about to be yellow flags they haven't all been so far I had a red and I had a green okay okay but that's definitely yellow. I think it's very healthy to have really strong friendships of the same sex. Yeah. I think it can be situational. So we've all seen the movies.

We've all seen how it ends with your best friend. Your best friend is going to be. Usually ending romantically. Yeah. Yeah. So I think just understanding boundaries and truly ask yourself like at the end of the day if it all hits the fan and you had to get married tomorrow who would you marry and if you would say your best friend then they're probably more than a best friend I think we see this one a little bit differently but

that's okay you're okay I it's just tough for me to no I I think we're on the same side okay because I'm saying at the end of the day if you could marry your best friend then and they're of the opposite sex like in this situation then then they're probably a little bit past best friend i would just say as a whole though i would i would classify that as a red flag yeah i would classify that as red flag okay next what if they've never been in a long-term relationship again context matters i think it's a yellow flag i think if they've been gone their whole life on a missions trip or something then like that's fine but if if they have this history of not having any relationship go past three months.

Why? Self reflection. You have to ask. You have to ask. Yeah. Long distance. Green yellow or red flag. We did that.

Yeah. I think it's normal nowadays. Yeah. I think it's a green flag. Earth's not like a promoted, but I'm just. It is good to be long distance. No, it's fine. I think it's fine.

I think it's practicing communication. If you can get through long distance, then I think that's a test, testament to your relationship. Yeah. many couples have we interviewed that said the distance actually ended up being a positive thing or drew holcomb was in the hospital for like three months and because of that their communication had to increase and improve so it's just it's just what you make of it at the end of the day you know okay so this is a big one that I was excited to talk about if he or she is hesitant to introduce you to their friends I think that is a red flag I agree

a massive red flag for many reasons one are they not wanting to show you off to their friends or introduce you to their friends or are they not wanting you to meet their friends because they're insecure or embarrassed by them i just i think it shows some flaw in the whole thing it's so hard though because the first like month or two a dating it's so exciting and all you want to do is spend all your time with the other person and friends kind of to some extent don't matter yeah but if you zoom out and you think about the path that that leads to 15, 20 years from now. Spending all your time with your spouse, I don't care who the freak you are or who the heck you married. I love you more than anything on this planet, but I cannot spend all day every day for 20 years with you. Think about that. And I think that's normal.

Sounds so miserable. I'm just saying friends matter and having the ability to have healthy friendships. is key yeah well i think your your friends or your community and i think that it says a lot about you so it's an impression and it's a glimpse into your world so i i think if someone doesn't want those worlds to mix there is an issue there or the alternatives they don't have any other friends in which case they just probably like don't do anything and don't get involved with anything don't and thus don't meet anybody and the end result of that is just being married to a boring person who doesn't get involved and doesn't have opinions and it's like the

reason you do a relationship honestly i think if you're having conflict it's because you're on the right track because you're both doing something you're both like working through it and you freaking i don't know why i'm fired up right now but that's how i feel no i just like i will say this i think a really healthy sign and something that is really exciting within a relationship is if your person is excited to introduce you to their friends. I think that is awesome and that is beautiful. If you just marry somebody exciting, it doesn't have to just do that.

If they're passionate about something, then that's great. I don't know why you're... No, this hit a soft spot for some reason. I think everybody was born for a specific purpose and reason, and there's a lot of people that don't pursue that, and then they kind of let that die. And it's just a bummer, because there's so many world changers out there that don't do what they're

supposed to and then they end up being boring people and they don't I'm on a tangent I freaking I'm gonna cut you off right now I just know just marry somebody passionate so you referenced if you had to spend every waking second with me for the next 20 years it'd be miserable oh geez lord help us moves on to our next one which is if he or she your person wants to spend all of their time with you is that a green yellow red flag no no no okay let's dissect this if they want to Spend all the time with you, but they don't. That's great. Green flag.

Yeah. If they want to and they try to and they have nothing else going on in their life. Red flag. Those relationships are very difficult. Yeah. I think successful relationships stem from people who are comfortable with themselves and have passions and interests and hobbies. Oh, see.

Yeah. Yes. And you get to share that with one another. And if you spend every waking second together, That's hard. I think it's adorable, though, to have someone that wants to spend all their time with you, but they don't because they know it's healthier. Huh?

I want to spend all my time with you. But you don't because you know it's healthy, not too. Okay. Last one, babe. All right. This was a red flag for a lot of people, and I'm going to disagree with them. Has a different or similar upbringing as you. Whoa, wait.

Is it a green yellow red flag if someone has a different upbringing? I think it's green. It doesn't matter. It should not affect. What if? Is it a green, yellow, or red flag if they have a similar upbringing? Green. Doesn't matter.

Doesn't matter. What do you get in that? I'm getting at an upbringing can shape who you are, but it does not define you as a person. And I think just because you're raised a certain way by a certain person, by a certain family in a certain area with a certain income or a certain class, that does not constitute a red flag in you not being worth my time. Agreed. But it will lead to certain behaviors, certain, you know, for sure.

Expectations that you should be aware of. Yeah. And I think that's a big thing with all of this is, one, let me just go on another tangent. We've been listening to this series called The Beautiful Design all about how each of us is made in God's image. Yes. And I think it is important to realize that all of us have amazing qualities about us. All of us have really bummer qualities about us. Yes.

one try to focus on the amazing qualities two realize that it's okay for not every relationship to be everything and just because you and i could be great friends doesn't mean we should marry each other and maybe the reason we don't marry each other is because your parents don't get along with me okay that's fine you know it's life yeah but also three having awareness just in general about yourself and others is important yes so there you go i think a big thing to take away from green yellow red flags be open-minded have self-reflective qualities with everything and don't write anyone off from a first judgment that it never ends well hold on we were about to end the episode but first impressions matter bro first impressions matter but instead of saying he doesn't have a headboard

I'm not going to call him again yeah yeah yeah give everybody the benefit of the doubt know what matters and No, what's important and what's not important. Yes. Okay, we'll end it there before Sean and I just start going at each other's shroats. Thank you for listening. This was fun. Thank you for all your suggestions and submissions on Instagram.

Just really interesting, you know? I feel like you learn about some, like the headboard. I got to just, I want to talk to her now. I know. I feel like we should do this episode again, but do all green flags. Because I think it would also say a lot about people. Yeah. Like, I went into his apartment and he had a headboard.

And it was like, yes. Yes. What? Finally. Anyway, thank you for all your participation. We love, we view these as conversations,

really, and it's just, you know, our word is not, you need to follow it and this is right, this is wrong. It's just the conversations

and we love having them with you. And I would love to hear if you guys have polar opposite opinions on any of this. Yeah. Please let us know. That's what we have,

though. If you haven't, and you made it, if you made it this far, please subscribe to the show and give it a rating. Clearly that was something that got you this far.

So stick around. That's all we have. I'm Andrew. I'm Sean. We are the East fam. Out.