Cox n' Crendor Show - 91 - Chlorophyll And Jesse Dont Mix

Episode Date: January 22, 2015

Jesse and Crendor finally get their bottles of Chlorophyll and as per usual, what should have been a simple tasting turns into a whole nonsensical affair. Also once again, the boys get to the heart of the matter when it comes to yoga pants.

Hello everybody, it's time for Cox and Crendor in the morning. In the morning. Broadcasting live, live, live, live, live. In 4 hour recording studio. Recording. Wake your ass up, it's Cox and Crendor in the morning. Cox and Crendor, in the morning! Coxy, Coxy, Coxy, Coxy, Coxy, Coxy, Coxy! Hello, everybody. Welcome to Cox and Crendor in the sickness.

Well, get... Wait, you're sick now. I'm sick. Look, I don't know if it's sick-sick or temporary illness. What do you got? Well, I was doing a lot of streaming the last few days, and got all worked up and i lost my voice and then because i lost my voice my nose started to run and it sort of like was a was a snowball effect of illness but i feel fine but my face is a mess like my my head cavity is a problem child right now you got no body aches no i feel fine i feel fine but my throat hurts and my nose just started running for no reason. I just started doing the day quill and the night quill and was like, I'll fix it real quick. Here's the thing. We got to go to PAX South this weekend. We do. And do our Cox and Crandor panel, which will be amazing, by the way. It will. I got my sickness out

of the way. Here's the thing. I might have to do, like, I might be the first person ever to go to a con to get rid of a cold. What? Yeah, I'm going to go, and then I'll be like, all right, well, from 10 to 6, I'll be at the convention. Then I'll go back to my room, and I'll just go to bed. Then I might have to do that if I don't get better. If I don't get better, I might have to do that. That sounds like an awesome day to me. Right?

Just going back to a hotel and just chilling there so people like you gotta go to any parties I'm like I mean if nobody I know is there then no here's here's the thing that I Friday there's a party there are two parties one for got out of hell which I feel like we should go to just to go to and there's one for blizzard that's like a blizzard twitch party which you like we should go to just to go to. And there's one for Blizzard. That's like a Blizzard Twitch party, which we should probably show up. But I'm literally, here's my plan. I'm going to let everyone at those parties know. This is what I'm going to do. Walk in, say, golly gee, you sure did a swell job.

Get whatever free stuff you got and leave. That's it. That's my plan. I'm being honest with you. That's my plan. That's the plan. Go get dinner at some place called Texas Pete's Chili Barbecue Warehouse. Go home.

That's my plan. I like it. Yeah, I mean, look, I feel like you'd be down with that, but I'm letting everyone know in advance. That's my strategy. Yeah, I like that strategy. But in order to get better. There's an Ikea fitting there. Oh, is there a Texas Ikea in the area we can go to?

Oh my god, is there? We should go and we should film it. Hold on. While you look it up, I'll drink my tea. Yeah, I didn't even think about that. Oh man. The closest one is... Oh wait, is...

Where is that? Can we hire an Uber to take us to the closest Ikea? It's kind of far. Is it? Yeah, I was hoping it'd be in San Antonio. How far is it? It is, hold on. It's direction, no, not Ikea.com.

I mean, I like you, Ikea.com. Couldn't we justify the cost? Because we'd make it back in the video money. Takes about two hours. Never mind. We could just go to any furniture store and be like, this is Ikea. No, no. Well, I guarantee it's not as good as the

one here. I guarantee it. It's just because you're used to that one. No, this one, there's two Ikeas here. You've never tasted the forbidden Ikea fruit. There's two Ikeas here. Crandon, you've never tasted the forbidden Ikea fruit. There's two Ikeas here. You don't know what's going on. That's like you've been dating that Ikea since high school.

You think you know Ikeas, but you don't know Ikeas. No, no, no, no, no, listen. Oh, Crandon, let me take you to a world of forbidden Ikeas. We're going to Vegas, the Vegas of Ikeas. I'm going to find you a nice Filipino Ikea girl, show you a good time. You know what I mean? I don't. But, Ikea there's two of them.

One of them Sounds like a dolphin laugh again. I can't laugh when I have a sore throat. I fell with that outlast thing. My throat was like dead as I was doing that. Then you're like, you're going to make tea. I'm like, yeah, I'm going to make tea.

Well, I pre-made tea. You should make tea before you do stuff. Well, I don't do that. Well, that's stupid. Back to Ikea. There's two Ikeas. One's like a spiral. The other one's just a big block.

It's like a normal furniture store. You walk around, whatever. The other one's just a big block. It's like a normal furniture store where you walk around, whatever. The spiral one's the one you want to go to. It's like three stories. The bottom has like all the cinnamon buns. The checkout, the top of it's the cafe. It's like a Disneyland. I want to go to that

now. I've never seen, I've only seen the box ones. Yeah, it's like a newer Ikea. It's legit. It's the best Ikea. Oh man, I wanna go to Chicago now. You should. I wanna go to Chicago and then you can show me around the Chicagoland area. I know. And I'll make a video of your fridge.

Oh my god. My fridge is great. I can't wait. It's legit. Pax Midwest. Pax Midwest. Make it happen. Bring it here. Make it happen. Bring it here. Yeah. PAX Chicago.

Just call it what it is. PAX Chicago. PAX Chicago. There's nowhere else in the Midwest to go. And the symbol's just a sausage. Just a fat guy eating a sausage. That's no X's. Gotta eat it, Ditka's. Oh, man.

I'm excited for that. So, two things. Because this may or may not be the last episode before we have to leave. I don't know. We might get one more in. Possibly. Two things. The first, everyone wants us to do a book for them.

Crendor. Really? Everyone wants an advice book. Everyone on planet Earth wants one. I have a feeling that would sell so well. We should look into that. I have a feeling that would sell so well. We should look into that. I agree. We should contact other YouTubers who fake wrote books and made a million dollars with their ghost writers.

We can hire one of those ghost writers. Yeah, man. If you're a publisher and you're looking to publish an amazing book, let us know. Let us know. The cover will be like, you doing okay? Shut up. Right? Like that one book about the

one guy wrote, you know, the one the girl's like, because he's like, I would die for you. She's like, you can't. I'm a grenade. Now you sound like me. You're like, oh, you're so dumb when you say it. You're like, you know that one book that guy wrote that the girls... Well, look, I'm sick like you.

I'm ill. It's like Twilight, you mean. Yes. No, not Twilight at all, but whatever. You said the one with the girls and the... I don't know. No, you know the one... They all have cancer.

Everyone has cancer. Oh, yeah. The Fault in Our Stars. Yeah. Yeah, we'll basically make the same cover, but it'll be an advice book. Yeah, it'll say The Fault in Our Entire Universe. Yes, The Fault. Just Your Fault.

That's the end of the book, Your Fault. Your Fault. People will be like, I was wondering, why can't I do well on tests? Be like, it's your fault. It's your fault. Your fault. Let's keep answering that to like a bunch of them if we don't know what to say. I like it.

I like it a lot. Also, speaking of things that might or might not be our fault, our health may or may not get better now. That was a horrible transition. Because Crandor and I bought liquid chlorophyll and we have it. It's true. We have it now in front of us. World organic liquid chlorophyll. Yep.

100 milligrams, nature's own flavor, dietary supplement. This is much bigger than I thought it was. Yeah, this is a pretty big bottle. This is a big ass bottle. It says shake well before use, refrigerate after opening, take one tablespoon daily. I don't think we're going to do that. Yeah, I'm not doing that. Chlorophyll contains a natural

green pigment that could stain. So, I'll try not to get it all over me. Don't spill the shit. Yeah. Alright, so I'm going to shake it. We're going to do this right now. Yep. I'm shaking it. I'm shaking it, Goddard. I'm shaking it. I'm shaking it right next to the thing. Oh, whoa, it's green.

Well, yeah. It's chlorophyll. From plants. I'm shaking it right next to the thing. Oh, whoa. It's green. Well, yeah. It's chlorophyll from plants. I was wondering if it would make the water here that I have green. Probably. I've had a... What's that other thing? Aloe vera? I've drank that. It's like cactus juice.

Oh, yeah. I like that you can rub aloe all over you. It makes you feel good. Oh, yeah. Oh, good. Oh, yeah. Oh, shit. Oh, shit. It just spilled everywhere. I poured mine excellently.

Oh, whoa. It's like food dye. It spilled literally everywhere. Well, what did you do? Did you put it on a spoon? Shit. Well, that's unfortunate. My desk is

going to be dyed green now. It's like St. Patrick's Day. Well, I just put way more than I should in one glass, you son of a bitch. I got the perfect amount. Well, dicks, hold on. Now I need to go wipe this off. Great.

Alright. Oh my god, it's literally everywhere. It is literally everywhere, Crandor. Oh my god. Now you're healthy. You're extremely healthy. So is your desk. Oh my god. Alright. I'm gonna try and wipe it up off the desk.

Let's wipe it up. The desk is now green-stained permanently. Do not get this on your carpet. Do not get this on your pets. Do not get this on your children, unless you want them green like the Incredible Hulk. There's definitely someone in Florida that's like, I dyed my dog with chlorophyll.

Now he's the color of the grass. Should you pour a new glass? I mean, I'm not going to take chances at this point and try and pour it again. Are you kidding me? It's still everywhere. Oh, my God. It's all over the walls. It's on the carpet.

It's on my fingers. All right, look. It's supposed to make you poop, right? Like, that's the whole point? It's supposed to make you go poo? Is that what we learned? Is it? Like, I don't know, man.

I don't know what this stuff does. It's supposed to make you go poo Is that what we learned? Wait is it? Like I don't know man I don't know what this stuff does It's supposed to just Like prevent diseases Well we're about to get Disease prevented right now You ready? Oh I'm ready Okay let's drink this stuff

Alright Count it down I already started drinking Oh Doesn't taste like anything Yeah it has no taste Definitely green now But it has no taste It tastes like water The water I poured It does taste like anything. Yeah, it has no taste. Definitely green now, but it has no taste. It tastes like water, the water I poured.

It does taste like water. Well, I guess we have to finish our glasses. Yeah, we've got to finish it. Obviously. All right. Man, this stuff is literally everywhere. It's everywhere. Oh, my God.

All right. I mean, are you drinking a lot of chlorophyll, though? I mean, I had a big glass of water, though, so I should balance it out, right? Yeah. I'm no scientist, but I think I got it figured out. Apparently, if the food is fresh and green, it's probably a good source of chlorophyll, and it's in leafy greens, wheatgrass, broccoli, asparagus, peas, and herbs like alfalfa. So, I mean, it's in vegetables.

Yeah, it's not going to kill me. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, I'm not going to die from it. He said nervously. It is everywhere, though, right now. It is legitimately everywhere. And I would normally just be like, oh, wipe it up with my t-shirt. Nope. I'd probably stain that

off green shit. People are like, what is that? Like, um, you know. Chlorophyll? Chlorophyll? Uh, yeah. Hold on. Let me go fix this now. Okay. I still have half a glass of this drink left.

I do too. I feel like we have to drink it all, but it half a glass of this drink left. I do, too. I feel like we have to drink it all, but it's a lot of water. It's a lot of water, and I'm scared. Yeah, water's better when you don't fear it and you can just gulp it down, but I don't want to die. Yeah, I feel like it's going to make me turn into a plant. But then we'd be like Poison Ivy. That's true. I'd be a sexy, sultry Jesse.

But then we'd be like Poison Ivy. That's true. I'd be a sexy, sultry Jesse. Hello, detective. Welcome to my potted plant factory. And he'd be like, Poison Jesse, we need you to calm down. You're creeping everyone out. Put your clothes back on.

It's a little weird. Don't you want to see my stem, officer? No? Please stop. You just keep drinking chlorophyll the whole time. Out of a martini glass? Sir, you're going to have to stop. You've got to stop drinking the chlorophyll. Are you sure, officer?

I'm in for you. No, please stop. I'm going to ask you to stop, sir. I'm going to ask you to stop with the puns. Put the clothes back on. You're creeping everyone out. Maybe a kiss before you go? Nope, I'm going to say no.

I got a lovely wife and children at home. I'd rather not risk it to kiss a weird man who's green. Wait, meh. Hold on, I'm reading more about liquid chlorophyll it's been used for years both to treat ailments and because of its apparent detoxifying capabilities or claims that it helps detoxify the liver helps body get rid of toxins that can aid in the growth of cancer does this by binding to them and preventing their absorption hot dog i mean I'm looking at the ingredients It can't kill you Right it's

Isotonic water solution Organically grown alfalfa leaves And kosher vegetable glycerin That's it that's all that's in here Stuff in plants Yeah so it can't kill you It's like if you ate a lot of plants It's not going to kill you

Right? Yeah possibly I mean I wouldn't know. What are the risks? There's some possible side effects. Cause the skin to become extra sensitive to the sun. Yeah. Yeah.

That's because you're getting your skin nutrients. Oh, that'd be great. Like, suck it up. Like, oh, sun, I feel your rays upon me. What if we figured out that it, like, helps vitamin D, like, oh, son, I feel your rays upon me. What if we figured out that it helps vitamin D production, right? Then you don't have to take vitamin D anymore. What about overdosing? Is that a thing?

Overdosing on chlorophyll. Yeah. The saddest obituary. Overdose on chlorophyll. Yep, that exists. Chlorophyll overdose. I mean exists. Chlorophyll overdose. I mean, what's the worst that could happen? Yeah.

Does it mean what's it supposed to say? Chlorophyll is a compound that does a bunch of stuff. Testing. You figure there'd be something for overdosing. I don't see anything. It says other side effects include digestive problems and possibly negative interactions with other drugs, though none of the symptoms are especially dangerous.

Oh, here's the worst that could happen. Chlorophyll, diarrhea, loose stool. Oh. Oh. So the worst that could happen is I'd have to go to the bathroom. That's the worst. All right. Oh, sweet.

I'm chugging this water. Yeah, the worst that could happen is you have to poo. Well, great. I'm fine with that. All right, yeah. I'll fight off the answer. That's nature right there. Get on board that train. Get on board the nature train. you have to poo. Well, great. I'm fine with that. All right, yeah. I'll fight off the answer. That's nature right there. Get on board that train.

Get on board the nature train. Don't do it every day, though. I have a feeling that taking it every day is a little crazy. A little much. Yeah, maybe once a week. Yeah. There's no reason to go nuts on your chlorophyll. I assume if you're eating plants and vegetables and things like that, you're fine.

I assume you're getting enough. Mm-hmm. Yeah. And if you aren't, maybe take a little chlorophyll. Make yourself healthy in the new year. Take a little morophyll. Ah!

Oh, poops! That'd be amazing if we started cracking up and then both together was like We're like, oh, podcast is over. My skin's turning green. Oh my god.

If my skin turned green, I would drink this and go to the panel. And it's like everybody just started watching me turn green. Just be like, uh... That would be amazing. Are you okay? Just like, what's wrong? What's wrong? Are you okay? Just like, what's wrong? What's wrong? Are you okay?

Just like freak out. Oh, boy. So, yeah, that is chlorophyll. Liquid chlorophyll. Look, I don't know if it's just placebo effect, but I'm starting to feel warm. Are you feeling warm? I'm not feeling warm. All right. Well, then I think I'm just overdosing it's just placebo effect, but I'm starting to feel warm. Are you feeling warm? I'm not feeling warm. All right.

Well, then I think I'm just overdosing. I think you are, too. You put a lot of chlorophyll in there. I didn't mean to. It just sort of spilt. I had a tablespoon, like a literal or whatever it said to put in. Well, that's what I tried to put in, but then it spilled. Yeah, one tablespoon.

I didn't mean for it to happen. I just did. That's what Hitler said. Alright, well, nope. Nope. Pretty sure that is not accurate. Don't put chlorophyll and Hitler together. Those do not belong together, Crandor. Okay. If a man never

had chlorophyll, it was him. I don't know why I said Hitler. I just picked a random person. That's because, you know what? That's because you want to play Gad Out of Hell. Yeah. Because you and I both know for the first time when we play Saints Row, you search for Hitler, he will actually be there. I know. You will actually find him in the game.

I like to think that it's because of me that he's in there. Yep. Yep. It's because of you, Hitler's in Hell. It perfect makes perfect sense uh so also because of you we need to go to choppy up something scab good door good door how's that traffic out there traffic whoa man let me tell you something about traffic it is insane up here the i-75s opening up the bright sunny skies skies that are now floating down to the misty mountains and the swimming pools of the ocean. And if we take a look over to the east, we see a bunch of plants growing down there. It appears that the chlorophyll has started leaking into the ocean and is spreading.

It appears that it's Madison Marvel. Madison Marvel has turned into a plant. They're actually sprouting from the ground and getting rooted there. It's a big shame. I think the chapter captor ran out of gas. This is not good. I'm going to... Yeah, we're going down! I think the chapter captor ran out of gas. This is not good. I'm a...

Yeah, we're going bad! Whee! Sounds pretty good to me, actually. I heard no disturbances. And the chapter captor's choppers were chopping. No, I didn't. I heard less chops. Nope, I heard zero disturbances.

Not at all. So, I guess now we head over to the sports desk. No, wait, weather. One of those. Weather, how you doing, weather? Hey, I'm weather. I don't know what I'm saying. Let's see.

This chlorophyll is messing with us. Is there a chlorophyll? There's no chlorophyll. How about photos? No. How about photos? No. How about plant? There's a plantapura Peru. That works.

Plantapura. Plantapura Peru. How you doing, Plantapura Peru? Let's kick it over to Woppy the Weather Bot. Plantapura Peru. 84 degrees. Partly cloudy. Thanks, Woppy the Weather Bot. Let the Peru 84 degrees partly clouded. Thanks, Woppy.

What the hell is the matter with you? It's Woppy the Weather Bot. Yep, of course it is. I couldn't do him last time because my voice

was too bad and I just keep coughing. Now I can at least do that. Wait a minute. You're Woppy the weather bot? No. Well, I have to voice activate him. Oh, all right.

I understand. That makes perfect sense. Yeah. Once he kicks over to the weather segment and I say the word weather, he kicks on. Gotcha. Gotcha. Did he kick on right now because he said weather again? Yeah, he's on right now.

Oh, all right. How do you shut him off? You just kick him. There you go. Wobbly powering down. That's the weather. All right, and sports. Sports is doing great over here in sports land.

Let me tell you something about football. This is doing great over here in sports land. Let me tell you something about football. This is a shitty weekend. How those Packers do. How those Packers do, buddy. So Packers managed to pull an upset almost. And then in the final three minutes of the game, they just probably the worst blown game I've ever seen they literally good summary good literally just fell apart it was just like they had to make one play to like win the game they're like all

right we're up 17 nothing or seven 19 to seven that's what it was they're like we just gotta make one play they intercept it with five minutes left you're like it's over right it's over then the the guy who intercepts it just slides down like the game's over. I'm like, why aren't you running, dude? Why aren't you running? You could run it back for a touchdown. He's like, no, I'm just going to slide down. We got this game. No. Then they do stupid plays. They punt it back to Seattle. Seattle's like, oh yeah, they score a touchdown. Then they go for two points, right? They just throw it up in there. on there they go for two points right they just throw it up in there guy doesn't even defend it he's just like oh man and then they go for the onside kick some guys like i'm supposed to be

blocking but i'm gonna go to catch it and he goes to catch it hits him in the head and seattle gets the ball if they would if he was blocked if he would have did his job game would have been over but he's a big dumb Dumbo You know what the problem with that was If you watch the game you can tell it's really really obvious All of them Suffered from the I'm in the playoffs and I want to make the big play

And save the day syndrome So they all thought like I'm going to be on the Wheaties box this is my chance To do it It was like just play Just play the game But they were all trying to be, just play. Just play the game. But they were all trying to be big shots, and it cost them the game.

Because you're not a big shot. You play for the Packers. Get out of town. I've seen some bad losses, but that was probably the worst loss just due to the fact that they were like five minutes away from the Super Bowl. Like literally five minutes away from the Super Bowl, and they just blew it open. And then the Patriots killed the Colts like 45-7 or something. Boo, Patriots! So now it's Patriots-Seahawks, and it's a thing.

I'll be honest. This year, I literally don't care about the Super Bowl. I don't either. Usually, I would care enough to be like, well, I'll go to a party and I'll watch the game. Don't care. I might justify, like, I'll watch the commercials. Last few years, commercials have been boring as hell. I would say maybe

a halftime show would be good. Don't care about the Katy Perry halftime show. She's never good live. Doesn't matter. I just, this year I just don't care about the Super Bowl. Don't care at all. I don't care either the Super Bowl. Don't care at all. Yeah, I don't care either. I was like, oh, man, is it going to be the Green Bay-New England matchup, or is it going to be like the Packers-Colts?

That'd be fun. And then I was just like, nope, nope. No one cares. Then they showed the replay. They showed the replay of the guy who intercepted it and then just slid down. He literally had to beat, like like two linemen and a quarterback. But he was like, I'm going to slide down. He would have got a touchdown.

This is the game. This is the game. He just slid down. Idiots are idiots. Idiots are idiots. That's all I'll say, even in sports. Yep. And so that's the way the crumble cookies.

Mm-hmm. Oh, has anyone ever made a cookie out of crumbles? I don't know. Called like the crumble. The crumble. Well, get a pack of the crumble. That's like something made of crumbles. Like Burger King.

Oh, Burger King, call us. It's like, have you tried the crumble yet? Come on down and get it with your yumbo. I was just about to say that. The best part about the yumbo is if you go look at the comments about the yumbo, all of them are negative. I know we talked about it, but go one day and read them. They're all like, this isn't the sandwich I remember. It's ham and cheese.

It's so dumb. What were you expecting like sir like i don't i still don't get how you mess up a ham and cheese sandwich it's like that it's like messing up the end of the football game with five minutes to go you're still very bitter about that aren't you it was like the worst loss like i've seen some bad losses. There was the one that was like third and twenty against the Eagles in the playoffs, and the Eagles converted it, and it was like, man, we lost

the game. Then there was like the Brett Favre threw like eight interceptions. Like, alright, whatever, he's Brett Favre. Then there was the one where Brett Favre threw the interception against the Giants at the end, trying to go to Super Bowls. Like, alright, whatever. This one was like ten bad plays all tied together in a matter of four minutes. And it was just like a bad dream.

And you're just like, what happened? And Russell Wilson's like, man, that was just an unbelievable comeback. I was like, it wasn't a comeback. It was just the Packers shitting the bed. Crandor analysis by Crandor. By the way, the Seahawks quarterback looked terrible. Like, oh, he

threw like, at halftime he had three interceptions and one pass completion. Like, that's how bad he was doing. He completed more passes to the other team than he did his own team. And yet he won. Well, I don't have a feeling the Patriots are going to destroy them. Here's problem though it doesn't matter i hate both teams then uh what's his name richard sherman the guy who last year was like don't talk to me like at the post game thing

he like hyper extended or broke his arm or something he was playing with one arm and they never threw at him i was like why aren't you going after the. He was playing with one arm, and they never threw at him. I was like, why aren't you going after the guy who's playing with his, like, broken arm? They're just like, we didn't think about doing that. It's like, why not?

He's got one arm. Like, throw the ball at him and be like, hey, tackle me with your one arm. He's not going to do it. You know what? It's all conspiracy. It's all conspiracy.

It's all conspiracy. It's the damn Patriots. The Patriot money. Those Patriots are cheaters. Yep. I bet they wanted to win. They were like, you know what? Green Bay already beat us this year.

We don't want to play them again. We don't want to play the Seahawks. We can beat them. It's all Patriot conspiracy. Not a fan of the Patriots. They're cheaters. By the way, Patriots, I forgot to mention this, sources tell ESPN that 11 of the 12 New England game balls

were inflated significantly less than the league requires, which means the Patriots were deflating their balls to help catch them. Well, yeah, sounds like something they would do. Yep, that's the Patriots. They're gross. I hate both the teams in the Super Bowl. I just want them to tie and injure everybody and be like, well, we all lost.

Yeah, hey, 2012. I don't know when you think you're going to happen, but now would be a good time. Right at the Super Bowl, just swallow the whole thing up. All the Seahawks and Patriots fans just swallowed in a giant hole. Yep. Oh, man. Where were you, Mayans? Yeah, where were you, Mayans?

We can use you right about now. Come on, slaggers. Don't worry, Jesse. We're cooking something up. That's not what the Mayans sound like. I guess. I'm sick. Get me a break.

Give me a chance. I'll cut you a jib. Get my jib. What's our big news story of the day? Oh, yeah, that's sports our big news story of the day? Oh, yeah, that's sports. Big news story of the day. I went to weird news this time. Yahoo didn't have anything good.

Best thing I found on Yahoo was like to freeze or not to freeze your food. Like, shut up, Yahoo. We got a, let's see. Owl swoops down and whomps unsuspecting jogger in head. That is cute, not news though. Hotel owner finds E.T. in stump. That is cute, not news though. We have woman vows to give up yoga pants to honor God and husband.

Now that's a news story. What? to honor God and husband. Now that's a new story. What? Veronica Partridge, Christian blogger, vows to give up yoga pants to honor God and husband. Why?

This woman is taking fashion sins a little more seriously than most. Christian blogger Veronica Partridge has been getting a lot of attention for a blog post earlier this month in which she vows to no longer wear leggings in public because of her religious beliefs. The decision, she writes, weighed heavy on her heart for several months, was done to inspire fewer lustful thoughts from men. What?

If you have time to weigh... Look, I needed to think about this because my butt is just so... Basically, she... In order to avoid she, she, in order to avoid lust, she, she gave into pride.

Essentially, essentially Christian vlogger. What you've done is like, my ass is so God damn beautiful. I just can't, I just can't help it. That is a fine ass in them pants. And all these men keep staring at my ass and I got,

they can't, I have to keep them from their own lust by hiding my glorious ass that's what she's saying that really is what that's really what she's saying the revelation that guys might be checking out partridge's partridges bespandexed bum is what led the 25 year old to quit leggings and yoga pants it is a decision she writes weighed heavy on her heart for several months. Not wanting people to gawk at you is perfectly a reasonable desire. However,

her decision sounds like it stems from her own discomfort. Not from her own discomfort, but because she feels personally responsible for not inciting sinful thought in men. Her husband confessed that it's hard not to look when he goes somewhere filled with leggings-clad women.

I try not to, but it's easy, he told her. Oh, I know what this is about. She caught her man looking at some other women, and she, because she also wears those leggings, is like, oh, well, the leggings are the sin here, not the fact that my husband was checking out another woman's ass. And so she's like, well, I'll refuse to wear them so my husband will understand that, you know, the sin is in the leggings. Oh, this is stupid. This is stupid. That's just a wacky family. She says, if it is difficult for my husband who loves, honors, and respects me to keep his eyes focused ahead, then how much more difficult could it be for a man that may not have the same self-control? See? See? Yep. He got caught. He got caught.

He got caught looking at a woman and looking at her pants. And she was like, oh, dear. They got in a fight. That's why the many months. And I bet she was like, so did you look at any other people's butts today, Philip? He was like, it was one time. Oh, my God. Don't you take the Lord's name in vain with me.

You look at their butts all the time, don't you? And in her crazy mind, she justified it because, oh because oh well if i get rid of my yoga pants then i won't tempt people much like my husband was tempted so i'll be the better christian here like no you don't look you can be a great christian and still stare at someone's butt yeah and it's like that's what i'm saying you're gonna start going that far you gotta it's like are you gonna stop stop wearing a bunch of clothes then? Just because you're like, it's going to make bad luck be like, who cares? You can't control other people's thoughts. I'm curious what her thoughts on a hijab or things like that are.

I'm curious what she thinks of those things. Because I imagine she'd be like, well, that is just, that's the worst. Because you're covering women up well that's i mean that's what you're doing though yeah like it's like those are just men who can't control themselves that's what you think of like that's silly you're silly you're silly you're both silly yeah your husband is silly you're silly you guys should just realize look your husband saw a chick in yoga pants yoga pants are hot i don't care what anyone says and people who wear yoga pants spoiler if you're a woman and you're wearing yoga pants. Yoga pants are hot. I don't care what anyone says. And people who wear yoga pants,

spoiler, if you're a woman and you're wearing yoga pants, you know what that makes you look like. You know it makes your ass look great. You know that's because you wear them. Because you want your ass to look great. And you like the fact that guys are probably checking it out. Don't pretend otherwise. Don't pretend otherwise.

The guy's not just like, oh man, just look at that. I'm gonna write an essay on that butt. He's just like, oh, man, just look at that. I'm going to write an essay on that butt. He's just like, oh, that looks good. And then he keeps walking. Sometimes I feel like, damn, I'd write an essay on that butt. Be in our book. Jesse's ass essay. Assay?

The assay? The assay. Today I saw Veronica Partridge's butt it was I never truly believed in greater power until now apparently incidentally this is the ad

currently appearing next to her blog post on the site and it's an ad for like yoga pants of course it is because for, like, yoga pants. Of course it is. Because she used the word yoga pants 12 million times, of course it appeared. Of course. Apparently leggings are banned in middle schools and high schools throughout the country.

Yeah, because they're like, those things are like, they fit your, damn, they fit that ass up good. No, like, yes, people, you know, I get like people, I get some people wear them specifically just for yoga. But how much do you want to bet 90% of the people who have yoga pants have never been to a yoga class or went once to justify the purchase and then wear them because they're comfortable? I get yoga pants are comfortable, ladies. I get it. But I also get that it makes you look your best.

It gives you the shape you want to have, and that's why you like them so much. I get it. Look, if there were pants called, like, giant package pants, I'd wear that shit all the time. Yeah. If there were yoga pants for men

where it made your wang look like it was 18 inches, I'd wear that all the time. And, like, here's a comment from Kelly Jo, and she says, I see a good-looking man. I think he's good-looking. I move on. I don't sit and ruminate about it. Also, I don't feel the need to harass her and attack or otherwise bother another person.

Why? Because I'm a person who polices my own thoughts and actions. It's not my job to police everyone and make sure they don't turn me into a victim. This, her type of people, and her type of thinking is the beginning of victim shaming, and it's atrocious. If she's uncomfortable with people ogling her because it's uncomfortable to her, fine. But if she thinks she has the power to stop men from ogling her, she's dead wrong. Yeah, I mean, I bet there's some guy out there right now, if she like a dress, some guy would be like, I wonder what's on under that dress. Like guys are creeps.

Guys are creeps. We're going to Google you no matter what. That's why whenever there's like women just like I hang out with guys. I was like, if I'm a woman, I wouldn't hang out with guys. No, I would not either. Ladies. Like if I ever meet a woman, she's like, all my friends are guys. I'm like, all those guys want to do you.

Despite what you think, they all want to do you. If I were a woman, I would not hang out with guys. Nope. I would not do it. Louis C.K. got it right. Man's a genius. When he was that one thing about dating where it's like we're the number one threat to women. Don't do it.

Get out. Ladies, find women friends. Stay away don't do it. Get out. Ladies, find women friends. Stay away from us. We're bad people. Oh, look, we look,

we're, we're not, we're not nice. Crandor and I are though. Crandor and I are the exception of the rule. We're very nice. Yeah. We drink chlorophyll.

What kind of, what kind of crazy person would drink chlorophyll? Not us, that's who. We're in touch with Mother Nature. Yeah, we're in touch with the nature. We're in touch with the inner spirit feminine sides. We're like half man, half woman already.

Yeah, we're so different compared to other men. Don't judge us. We'd be your friend. Yeah. And then do it with you. God, I knew you were going to say that. I literally knew you were going to say that. Do not surprise me at all.

Just wear what you want. Yeah, just wear what you want. wear yoga pants wear burkas wear uh you know a poncho with a like shovel on the back with a flag you know i wear sweatpants every day i don't care yeah some people might think that's sexy not me some people might but you know what i don't care i had someone be like, dude, those sweatpants are really cool. I'd be like, yeah, thanks. Someone would be like, that's so dumb and weird. I'd be like, you know what? I don't care.

They're comfortable. Yeah. I don't care. I wear what I want. Yeah, I get that yoga pants are comfortable, but I also get they make you look freaking sexy. So let your sex flag fly, ladies. Show off that ass. If you want to have juicy on your butt, put it there. I'll look, but I ain't going to touch it.

I'm not a pervert. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Unless you want me to. God. All right, that's it. We're done.

We're done. I have to close it out with Florida teen pretends to be a doctor for a month isn't charged. I saw that on the side. Maybe he was a good doctor. It's Florida. He probably was the most credentialed doctor. His police and Florida officials at St. Mary's Medical Center in West Palm Beach agreed not to charge teenager they thought they caught posing as a doctor.

They report that he, a patient alerted staff at the medical center's OB-GYN office. OB-GYN? OB-GYN. Whoa, so he was a vagina doctor? He was, but he wasn't. But he wasn't a vagina doctor. Oh, no. He was.

He was. Wait, what? That a juvenile dressed in a lab coat was inside an exam room. The patient said the lab coat had St. Mary's logo and anesthesiology stitched on the front. A security guard told police he'd seen the teen doctor around the hospital for a month. Another said the teen entered secured areas of the hospital. The teen told police he's been a doctor for years.

Here's the best part. That kid was just going around. Like, that's the plot of a 90s guy comedy movie. Like, man, if I don't get anybody by the end of the year, I'm going to be such a loser. Meet Phil.

He was a loser. Until his uncle died and left him all of his lab equipment. Phil decided to go work in the OBGYN. And now he's getting all the ladies. Best part. Final sentence. The teen's mother told police he's under the care of a doctor And is not taking his medicine

Of course not It's Florida Yep Alright, that's it, thank you so much Reminder will be Sunday 12.30 Sunday, Sunday, Sunday Back south, come watch us

And we will see you later. Yeah. Ping it, ping it, ping it. To be continued.