Cox n' Crendor Show - Cox N' Crendor Beta: Thursday, December 13th

Episode Date: December 13, 2012

Jesse n' Crendor are living the dream.... a dream controlled by Matrix Robots! Also, did you know there are bad gifts that you can give people for Christmas? Seriously!? Sometimes people don't like what you give them! Also the boys wax philosophic.

Hello everybody, it's time for Ghost on Trendog! This is Trendog in the morning. In the morning! Broadcasting live, live, live, live, live! In 4-hour recording studios. Recording! Hit me! Wake your ass up! It's the next Trendog in the morning!

Hit me, hit me, hit me, hit me! Trendog in the morning! Hobbits, hobbits, hobbits! We're going to the party! Hello there, everybody! It is Thursday, or more importantly... The day of Thursdays. Oh, shut up. All Hobbits Eve. All Hobbits Eve. I'm very excited. In maybe 18 hours from now, I get to see The Hobbit.

There's some people who are like, it's not very good. To you, I say, you're not very good. I have extremely low expectations, just like I go into everything with. That way, I'm never disappointed. I'm excited because I get to go back to where I want to live, Middle Earth, and see characters that I like seeing, and I love the actor who plays Bilbo, so it's a win-win for me

people are like it's really slow I thought the first Lord of the Rings movie was really slow so I'm okay with that as long as it builds up to something awesome I can sit through slow to get to amazing a lot of like reviews I saw are really picky IMO like I think they feel like it's they put it up to such high standards to compare it to Lord of the Rings. And they're like, the noses look kind of fake. I'm like, I don't care.

Or like, the FPS is like a little, it's like 40H instead of 24, so it looks more like a soap opera. I'm like, okay. Here's the thing that's gonna be amazing. James Cameron wants to do the Avatar movies in 60 FPS. Or he is one of the two, which is, you know, that's what most people play video games at, 60 FPS.

So to a lot of people that won't be a problem. But if you're having headaches at 48, your brain's going to melt out your ears at 60. In fact, remember when Avatar came out and people... This is so pathetic. This may be a sign that we are a pathetic species. When people got emotionally depressed because they couldn't live in the Avatar world. Do you remember that? There were news stories where people, because it was so real,

and because it was in 3D, it was so like you were there, that people got really depressed. And they were like, I just want to live in Avatar land. Imagine at 60. At 60, people are just going to lose their minds. I am an Avatar man. Well, then you don't have to worry because you are in the world.

It's so real that you're there. Right? I guess. I feel like it's like the TVs that we have where it does that motion thing where it fills in the frames to make it look like it's running at a high FPS. But I don't really mind that. Crandor and I both have a Samsung, although his is better than mine because mine's like a year earlier. But it's both one of those TVs where if you uh if you press a button it can jump to 240 hertz i guess that's what that is and that combined with it's like processing however

does the fps everything if you put it up to 240 it looks like you're in the room with them while they're filming it no longer becomes a tv show it becomes a play and it's really disturbing i can't watch stuff at that level i have a i honestly have a play. And it's really disturbing. I can't watch stuff at that level. I have a I honestly have a problem with it. It depends because like when I tried watching Lord of the Rings and I kept turning it on and off and I didn't know which version I wanted. Like I would

go to the normal version and I was like, well actually I kind of want to see it in the other way. And then I would go to the other one and I was like, this is so weird! And then I'd switch back to the other one and I just kept doing that like for half an hour it's it's I'll watch uh tv shows especially uh hour-long dramas usually on comedy shows the cameras they use are pretty you can't tell the difference but on real emotional like law and order type shows especially things that are filmed in HD, so the New Earth stuff,

it's, you can see the makeup they applied on the people, and you can see, like, every, everything, and it's really jarring. Older stuff, I guess because of the way they filmed it, you can't tell. So anything 10 years ago plus, you can't tell. But that 240 hertz stuff is really disturbing, and so I'm just hoping one day we get an Avatar movie that's 240 hertz and it's 60 FPS and everyone's brain is just like, what's real? I don't even know. If you haven't watched Lord of the Rings in that, like, movie mode, just try it. Like, before you see The Hobbit. It is like gandalf's riding into the town it looks so crazy

it looks real and i'm like gandalf isn't real it's like messing with my brain well speaking of messing with your brain and what's real and what's not real i want to open today even though technically we just opened with talking about tvs blowing your mind but um here's a story that I found That was actually sent to us by a fan Science Again, science I give you a hard time And then I backtrack a little bit But then I read stuff like this And immediately want to just

Quit on life Scientists Plan to test to see If the entire universe Is a simulation created by futuristic supercomputers. I saw that. U.S. scientists are attempting to find out whether all of humanity is currently living in a Matrix-style computer simulation being run by supercomputers of the future. I feel like we have nothing better to do.

We're just like, you know what? Let's let's find out for run by supercomputers yeah like that's that here's the thing though is their theory and hypothesis and stuff it actually makes sense it's just a giant waste of time but here's the thing though if they discover that we are but if this is like we're all in the matrix I'll be, like, the bad guy from the first one who's like, I just want to have steak and be a movie star. That's me. Matrix computer, if you're listening, I will sell out so quickly. I will be that guy.

I will betray the rebellion. I just want to be a movie star. That's me. According to researchers at the University of Washington, there are tests that could be done to begin to work out whether we are, in fact, real or merely a simulation created by a futuristic android on its lunch break. Here's the thing. Reality is a relative thing anyway.

Mm-hmm. The only thing that you can prove, according to, I believe, I think as a former... As a Socrates. Yeah, I think you can appreciate this as a former philosophy and psychology person. Because we took one class, we know. We know very... No, I took two psych classes and a philosophy class. Oh, I took philosophy all the way up to ethics.

So, I know a all the way up to ethics. Oh, wow. So I know a great deal about philosophy. Well, I also learned about philosophy on the internet and from books. Well, I don't read, so I guess we're on par now. All right. So the only thing that our philosophy counterparts would tell us that we know is real is us. Our mind. Right?

counterparts would tell us that we know is real as us. Our mind. Right? So I know I'm real because my mind is perceiving information. But this table that I'm knocking on, I don't know if people can hear that, that might not be real. That's just nerve and perceptions of a table. I think there's a table there.

It might not be a table. You might not even be a real person. You listening right now, you might not even be real, man. And then again, what makes it a table? Right? So, there's all, it's like reality, the whole idea that oh, what's real? No one knows. That's the whole point. That's why

this study in itself is insane. That's why a lot of people with philosophy, they're like, oh yeah, I know about philosophy. And it's like, philosophy, you probably don't because philosophy is supposed to like make your mind you probably don't because philosophy is supposed to like make your mind go crazy yeah philosophy is the idea that you question everything and that I think that's good for school if you're in

school question everything if your teacher tells you something ask them why that is like I was reading the like this book of just like all these philosophers and it had like one of the crazy it it was just like, so is life worth living? Well, only the good life is worth living. Does that mean if your life is not good, it is not worth living? Let us analyze the good life. What makes life good?

And I was just like, oh my God, this is crazy. Yup. There's things, one of my favorite classes was when we talked about the existence of God and how you could prove it or disprove it. And there's like a million different hypotheses, but the one that always stuck with me,

that I guess it's flawed, and I don't remember why it's flawed, I just know that it is, but the one that always stuck with me that makes sense is the prime mover theory. Ooh, look at us get all philosophical. The prime mover theory is basically everything has a cause and effect. Everything. Right? So us having this podcast was caused by us talking about, hey, we should do a podcast. That's like a morning show. And that was

brought on by the fact that we spent so much time playing video games together and we just, you know, had random conversations that, and it goes back and back and back back to like what you had breakfast three years ago, to back to dinosaurs, to back to the Big Bang, to back to whatever caused that, right? The whole thing.

Like, if one of those things changed, it would, like, mess up everything. Well, the idea is that everything was caused. It doesn't even matter. Like, everything was caused by something else, right? Yeah. And it all goes cause and effect back to the beginning of whatever. But whatever that thing that caused the first cause without having been caused by something else, right?

Whatever caused the first effect but just did it because, like there was like no reason behind it, that's God, whatever that is. And it's either that could have happened randomly or it could have come from something that was, we don't know how that thing came about. It works, right? Yeah.

I mean, the whole idea is like, that's like a proof. I mean, it doesn't prove that there would be like a Christian god or, you know, some type of Hindu god or anything. It's just, it proves that whatever that thing that started something, that is God. something that is god and then could that higher being be even part of a whole group of other higher beings that have been created by another group of higher beings exactly and that's and that's the thing and that's that's that's philosophy you'll never get an answer and you'll just think it's actually one of the signs of an enlightened culture though when you have people who can get to the point where they can think about stuff without having to have every day, the only thing they can think about is where they're

going to get food or how they're going to provide for the family. When you get to that level then you've reached an enlightened society. That's why my favorite quote My favorite philosophical quote is from Socrates and he said, I know that I know nothing. Yup, that's how

he knows he's smart. Because the smart people know they don't know a thing. It makes sense because the more you learn, the more you realize you didn't know anything. Because on the path to knowledge, look at us, we're so intelligent. On the path to knowledge, you realize as you learn more that there's so much more out there to learn. When you learn something new, you're like, holy crap, there's a whole selection of things associated with this new thing I learned. And so you have to keep learning and keep learning. And the people who think they know everything, those are the douchebags who are always wrong.

Yep. Now to get back to why scientists are wrong. Scientists are wrong. So it goes to say Currently, computer simulations Are decades away from creating even a primitive Working model of the universe In fact, scientists are able to accurately model Only about 100 trillionth of a meter

With work to create a model Of the full human being still out of reach Wow, okay But looking for underlying patterns Physicists believe it may be possible to work out if we are existing In a computer-created universe Created many years in the future Looking at constraints imposed on simulations

By limiting resources could show signs Of whether we are mere bit players In a Matrix-style film plot LOLOLOL Here's the thing though With all this research And all this talk about Whether we're in a computer or not, the one thing that might give credence to this, what's beyond the universe?

Uh, I don't know. Wouldn't that be outside of time? Exactly. What's beyond the universe, man? Because there's the universe, right? And it's expanding. But expanding into what? I don't know. cuz there's the universe right and it's expanding but expanding into what oh no And here's the thing if the Big Bang Theory is correct when it exploded

It would go fast and the stuff on the outside would get slower and slower and slower right an explosion right and so it's slow Down the further it gets away from the center the big bang, but it's speeding up Yeah So what does it mean again we should just do an entire show called like the philosophy hour we should we could go on for hours i'd love philosophy because because really you can say anything anything that's why and and philosophy yeah nothing is sacred you can say anything and and if you can prove your point, you're good. Socrates is somewhere like, good point, good point. That's why it's not like math or something where it's like, oh, 2 plus 2 does equal 4. Like, it's the complete opposite of math because you don't get any, like, solid answers.

But with math, that's why math is a universal language because it's always the same no matter what. Yep. That's why my dad will always be like, this was the good music back in the day. And I like, I was like, well, actually it's your perception of music because music is a very perceptual thing.

And I went into this thing and he was just like, oh, back in my day, this was good music. And I was like, okay. Back in my day, this was good music. I was like, okay. And it's the same thing with what you perceive to be good music. A lot of your musical taste is influenced by stuff you heard when you were younger. And so things that I like now, I know that I like that

from being forced to sit in a car with my parents listening to the music they liked. Yep. And you can relate a lot of that to liked. And it influenced what I like. And it influenced what I like. Emotions. Right? Because you remember something. It's all connected! All connected! Ain't no robot gonna make that real!

Yeah, robots. But I will still join in killing the rebellion robots. Don't take that as a no. Yeah. I will work for you. Yes. We will work for you yes we we will work for you in fact i think this is what we are working for the robots in this podcast you will obey our masters started on science about whatever ended on robots controlling robots taking over the world that's been a theme lately that we've had Usually all of our podcasts end with robots taking over

We obviously know something I'm not saying that we don't But I mean the world ends in a few days anyway So it's whatever That's probably what's going to happen The world won't end It'll just be Mayan robots Holy shit

No one ever thought of that The pyramids open and Mayan robots come out and just start laser blasting people. Zero. Zero. Yeah, we forgot to talk about 12, 12, 12, 12, 12, 12, 12. We should have recorded at 12, 12 on 12, 12, 12. We should have. That would have been amazing.

I feel like that's how we would have gotten in contact with our robot masters. It is. They have the computational skills to record at that precise time. It would have been like ghost adventures. Wait, hold on. Did you hear that? Oh, my God, ghosts, man. Dude, that sounded like a ghost.

Again, for those who have never seen this show, there's ghost hunters on SyFy, right? Which is, it's pretty, it's pretty okay. I wouldn't call it legit, any more legit than the show we're talking about. It's still TV, but at least they are somewhat likable characters. Ghost Adventures! They pick, like, the three

douchiest guys. One guy always has his, like, Ed Hardy shirt on with his hair all just spiked up. I'm not afraid of you ghosts. Bring it on. And then the other dude's like, dude, why are you calling out the ghosts, man? He swears at ghosts

and he yells. He's like, why don't you come get me? There was one time they were in Italy, I think, and he's swearing at a ghost in Italian. It was amazing. And then one of the guys has this dude who's bald with this giant beard and he has the best

reactions. Every time he hears anything he looks like he's about to die. He's just like dude man. Dude. Crazy as shit man. And then there's just the other guy

who's just like a normal, like, camera guy. He's just like, man, this is kind of crazy. But he looks like he's seen some hard times in his life. He does look like an ex-felon. He looks like a con is what I'm saying. He has been through some stuff. All those guys together, and they could go

anywhere and be entertaining. Like, you could imagine them going to, like, a steakhouse just being like, I'm saying. He has been through some stuff. And you just put all those guys together and they could go anywhere and be entertaining. Like, you could imagine them going to like a steakhouse just being like, I'm going to order your biggest steak. He's like, Dude, you're going to order the biggest steak?

Oh my god, dude! And they film it. So the idea is, it's this guy who's really douchey and his two friends who are less douchey but still hilarious. And so the douchey guy,

there's, and as an example, they go to this one place where a guy was killed by an elevator. Like, the elevator crushed his head. And so the douchey guy, and as an example, they go to this one place where a guy was killed by an elevator. Like, the elevator crushed his head. And so what he does is he takes a camera, lays in the elevator shaft, and is like, turn on the elevator. And his friends are like,

what are you doing, man? He's like, I'm gonna see what it was like to get crushed by an elevator. Just like old man James. He's playing chicken with an elevator as it comes down on him. And his friends are like, get out of there, man! It's hilarious.

We're like, what does this have to do with finding ghosts? And then they go and try to hunt these ghosts. And by the time they actually get to anything, there's like five minutes left in the show. And then it's them walking around with cameras like, did you see that, man? There was a noise. And the one guy's like, oh!

Noises! It's amazing. If you look there, there's an orb passing through. It looks like dust, but it is not. The best part, we saw this. It's so funny how they try to sell it. One of the guys, as he lays the thing down,

a weird orbies across the room This orb of light And they're freaked out by this footage They don't know what it is, they can't figure it out Meanwhile, if you look as this guy's putting down this scanner His other hand, which has a watch on it Moves in the exact opposite pattern Of the orb flying across the room

So it's just the reflection of his wristwatch. And they are freaking out that they've discovered a ghost. It's an amazing show. You need to find the show on Ghost Adventures. It's an amazing show. It is the best. The best show on TV. It's so entertaining.

That's really what it is. I wish we could be an eighth as just an eighth as entertaining as them. Yes. Holy crap. All right. Well, now that we've wasted a bunch of time, I think it's time to go to chapter 7 in the sky to talk about traffic. Crendor, what's going on with traffic?

Well, today there's a decent amount of traffic. People are getting excited because we're closing in on Friday, so they're starting to speed. So there's an accident down at the IOK 59. And a backup over there, too, because of that accident. So don't take that road. It sucks. All right. Now let's go to the weather desk. How's the weather looking, Crandor?

Well, at the weather desk today, we're not going to Italy because you have confusing languages in Italy. Italian. Yeah, instead. Although, what's real, man? Maybe that's not the real language there. What if, to everyone who doesn't speak English, we sound like we're speaking a foreign language? Whoa. Which is actually the case. Whoa.

Which is actually the case. The weather in Yuma, Arizona today is 73 degrees Fahrenheit, 50% chance of thunderstorms. You got to watch out for those thunderstorms. They're going to be later in the day, though, so you're going to have to do all your shopping and everything you want to do early in the day. Sunrise is going to come up at 7.33 a.m., so that's going to be when you want to get out there and get all your stuff Cuz you might get hit by lightning otherwise Trending thing might Yuma, Arizona are cold snow and rain even though it's 73 degrees there I mean, let's see some local tweets We got one fair and 53 degrees

Imperial California winds. Like, this is just a weather bot. No one's tweeting. Nobody's tweeting. No one in Arizona knows how to tweet. They are very unfair. Yeah, what happened to that girl that we told everyone to tweet at? You know what?

She definitely didn't respond. She was probably a bot, too. But people tweeted her. I saw the tweets. She probably is a bot. She probably is a bot. These But people tweeted her. I saw the tweets. She probably is a bot. She probably is a bot. These are all probably weather bots that you're reading. Or she's just like a high schooler programmed

to be a weather bot. Whoa. Yeah. By the matrix machines. Yep. Can you imagine her in class? They're just like, uh, whatever your name was, what's the answer to this question? And she's like, it is 42 degrees Celsius in Italy. Calculating.

And they're like, wow, you got that right. She's very good. But she only takes weather classes. Yeah, that's the weather. And now to sports. What's going on at the sports desk? CJ Miles does it again with 28. He's got six trays. What? That's basketball

terminology for six three-pointers. Well, I am definitely a basketball fan, so I know all of that. C.J. Miles plays for the Cleveland Cavaliers, and he scored 28 points for the second straight game with two rebounds, two assists, a steal, a block, and a season-high six three-pointers and a loss to the Pacers. So they lost anyway. Well, he's probably the only one on that team doing anything. Probably. The Cavs really aren't that great.

They lost the one player they had. That was that. Yeah. That's sports. All right. Now let's go to our big news story of the day. What do you got for me? Well, since the holidays are coming up, we got the 12 worst holiday gifts.

I cannot wait to hear this. Because, obviously, if you are a very caring person and observant and pay attention to the people around you, you need holiday gift guides. Right. Because, I mean, who knows what your family

and friends want. My dad is the hardest person ever to shop for. Ever. Ever. I think I'm starting to reach his level of hard to shop for. Because when people ask me what I want, I just say, I'm content. I don't really need anything. And I know that they're scrambling to find things for me.

I'm like, no, I just, really, I don't want anything. I feel like my dad, who is at the point where he's like, whatever. Sure. So, yeah. That's, I can't wait to hear this. What do we got? 12 worst. Well, number one is the pickle bottle stopper.

What? Here, I'll show you a picture. It's a bottle stopper, but it's got a pickle on top. Oh, my God. Because who really wants to use a cork in their wine bottle? The perfect gift for a friend who happens to really adore both pickles and wine. You would think that then in the wine bottle would be vinegar. Like, that's the implication.

Yeah. Or some pickle juice. You would think. That's a very stupid gift. Well, I mean, these are the implication. Yeah. Or some pickle juice. You would think. That's a very stupid gift. Well, I mean, these are the worst gifts. I like how they call it the worst gifts, yet they're like, this is the perfect gift for this person. Yeah, wait, why are they trying to upsell these gifts? I don't know.

All right. Pillow remote control. For the true couch potato, this pillow comes with built-in remote control. You'll never have to worry about losing the remote between the cushions again. Oh, my God. It's just a pillow with, like, numbers and stuff on it. So I guess you can do that. So this is like their tongue-in-cheek, like, they're the worst gifts.

Here's where to buy them. Yeah, pretty much. You can buy that at Brookstone, which is the store everyone looks at and touches everything and then leaves. That and the sharper image. The stores where people go to look at stuff and then never buy.

Number three is the Zoltar. The Zoltar? That sounds awesome. It's like a big arcade thing with the fortune teller guy in it and he's like, I am Zoltar. Wait, why would you? Why would you? So basically, it's one of those automated fortune tellers.

Why would you buy that for something? It's $9,000. Why would you spend $9,000 on a gift no one would use? Someone would use it. Maybe your great aunt is into predicting fortunes and stuff. Zoltar will use. It's gonna go to the ghost adventures. Dude, Zoltar

just predicted my future, man. He said I was gonna see a ghost. He was right. Oh my god. Number four. Santa's farting butt travel pillow. Jesus.

Tis the season for traveling. Why not cozy up with this pillow while you're on the go? Well, we can think a few reasons. It's $20 if you want it. You can get it at... What a farting thing. You can get it at stupid.com. That sounds about right.

Number five, bacon candy canes. Because everything now is bacon. Has to have bacon. Yep. Thanks a lot, Epic Meal Time. You ruined it for everyone. Yep. You ruined it for everyone.

Bacon's just like, ugh. I used to just be non-mainstream. Delicious. I used to be delicious. Now I'm played out. Way too mainstream now. Somewhere there's a bacon hipster. It's way too mainstream

now. It's wearing little glasses. I only eat Canadian bacon and ham. I eat Canadian bacon now because it's very hip. Very hip. Plus it's from Canada. So, yeah. It's like outsourced into America.

It's raised on the Canadian prairie by Inuit people. Only the best. Number six, inflatable turkey. Don't like cooking? No problem. Nothing would be funnier than inviting everyone for Christmas dinner and serving them this turkey. The joke will outweigh their hunger. No! That's not funny! That's not funny! They'd be like, guess what everyone? We got an inflatable turkey! I'd be like,

okay, uh, where's... No, where's the real one? Yeah, where's the real one? It even, it looks fake. Who's gonna be like, oh, that looks like a really good turkey! The tail end of it has a blow-up thingy on it. That crazy uncle we were talking about, that drunk uncle, back in Thanksgiving we were talking about. That looks delicious. That boy like a great turkey. That looks delicious, pop.

He tries to stab it. He's like, you know whose fault this is? Obama. We don't even have real turkeys in America anymore. It's all from China. It's all China. Dammit, Obama. He just like tries stabbing it again.

He stabs like little Timmy, the cousin. It's like, uncle Dammit, Obama! He just, like, tries stabbing it again, and he stabs, like, little Timmy, the cousin. It's just like, Uncle, you stabbed me! Blame it on your president! Back in my day, we took stabbings like a man! Number seven. The upcycled sweater moose head. Remember your childhood? The only thing you wanted for Christmas during the majority of your first decade were toys. This sweater moose head

adds a perfectly refined taste to any kid's room. That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard in my entire life. I wanted video games. Single stupidest. Just keep going through these. I have no tolerance for this article right now. It's not even a toy. It's just a moose head. It's not like an action figure or anything.

Like action. A kid doesn't want a moose head. It's just like, I want action figures. Well, I got you a moose head. It's not like an action figure or anything. A kid doesn't want a moose head. It's just like, I want action figures. Well, I got you a moose head. Oh, my God. That's worse than the socks and underwear. I bought you a moose head. What kind of kid wants a moose head? It's not even a freaking regular.

Look at this. It's a sweater moose head. If you're going to use something for the podcast, use that. Dude. Oh, I want that, actually. That is really. That's the podcast image. Done.

Number eight. The dream man arm pillow. I've seen this. That is the creepiest thing ever. Remind your friend she's single this holiday when you buy her this arm pillow. When she cuddles with it at night, it will be just like the real thing. No, no, it's just like you have a pillow around you. It's creepy.

That's for the woman who's like, my cats are my companions, but when I need a man, I rub up on his pillow. You are sad, dear. That's the ultimate forever alone gift. The ultimate gift. The zombie bleeding mutilated target dummy. Help your loved ones prepare for the zombie apocalypse with this target dummy. Zombies are about as played out as

bacon. Speaking of that, you can get my zombie dragon shirt on Rodeo Arcade. You sell out. Free shipping for the next three days. And it comes with free bacon. Free bacon. Somewhere there's a hipster wearing a non-zombie dragon shirt. It comes with free any type of

bacon you want. Disclaimer, there may not be bacon. Next! Next is the Chew-By-Numbers Christmas Tree. We all know that chopping down trees isn't environmentally friendly. Go green this Christmas by making your own tree out of the gum you chewed. Are you kidding me? It even comes with 32 pieces of

your favorite gum that may not be your favorite. These are the worst gifts ever. Why are they advertising them? Because they advertise it as the worst gifts ever. Yeah, but then they're like, buy it for people. Wait, somewhere someone had to approve this as a product and then say, I'll help you sell it. It happened.

Number 11. Barack Obama Chia Pet. Sold. I want that. I want a Barack Obama Chia Pet. I want that. Perfect gift for the Obama supporter in your life. Give that to your crazy uncle.

Yep. He's going to love it. Speaking of Obama, you can blame this Chia Pet now. He just goes up to it every day. He's just like, this is your fault. He waits for his hangover and he's like, this is your fault. And he just waters it with beer. You won't even grow.

Suck a bomb of Chia Pet. And finally. Thank God. The Dance Moms bobblehead. As if watching Dance Moms wasn't enough, you can now bring Abby Lee Miller right to your very desk. No one wants that, not even her. Nope.

She's like, this is so tacky. Somewhere Honey Boo Boo is like, Dala makes me holla. And that's the perfect time to end the show. Thank you everybody for listening and we will be back tomorrow. Yeah. Exactly. Exactly. For another show.

For a Friday Spectacular. So, as always, to be continued.