Cox n' Crendor Show - Episode 144 - Black November?

Episode Date: December 1, 2017

The boys are back with their annual Black Friday episode, but this time they discover, according to the news, Black Friday is done for! Could this be the last ever Black Friday episode?! How many more times will they write Black Friday in this description!? Also a man wants black himself off in a steam powered rocket to prove the earth is flat - so that's gonna be stupid! All this and more, on this exciting episode of Cox n' Crendor!

Hello everybody, it's time for Cox and Crendor in the morning. In the morning. Broadcasting live, live, live, live, live. In 4 hour recording studio. Recorded. Wake your ass up, it's Cox and Crendor in the morning. Welcome to Cox and Crandall in the morning! Coo-poo-poo-poo-poo-poo!

Crandall in the morning! Hello everybody and welcome to Cox and Crandall in the morning! Ehhhhhhhhh... Hello. Uh-huh. That's like, uh, surround sound. I don't know if that's, I mean, I guess we'll have to hear it when we put this together all I heard was you it sounded like you were Doppler affecting from like one side of the room to the other nobody will know for sure except me oh well all right good good I mean anyone watching

no one's watching right now. You never know, George. They're in the walls. Okay. All right. All right. So how you doing, buddy? How was your weekend? It was Black Friday weekend. I know.

We have to do this podcast. This is the annual special. You can't pass this up. And now it's a little more relevant because it's like Cyber Monday now. That's practically the same thing. You know what? I was just reading an article, and it angered me. It says, Black Friday is dead, and it's been replaced by an even bigger shopping event. And then the image is of a man buying a 65-inch TV and then looking at other TVs.

And this is what it says. The idea of Black Friday as a one-day shopping event finally died this year. Did it? Did it? I don't think it did. Its death comes amid the rise of mobile shopping and a decline in the number of unique discounts. This is my least favorite part of this article. Black Friday is now going to be replaced, according to

one analyst, by Black November. What? It's no longer Black Friday. It's now Black November, says Marshall Cohen of the NPD group, whatever the hell that is. NPD? Online sales from November 1st through 22nd totaled

$30 billion this year. That's 18% year-over-year growth, according to the Adobe Analytics. I don't trust Adobe with anything. I barely trust them to make my videos. That is true. Black Friday remains one of the biggest shopping days of the year, but... Wait, you can't...

The article can't say Black Friday's dead and then say it remains one of the biggest shopping days of the year. That's why people say fake news. Holy crap. But now it shares a spotlight with Thanksgiving and Cyber Monday and the two weekend days in between. Thanksgiving's now the third biggest shopping day of the year.

What? You can't just... It's dead. Guys, it's dead. It's now a month. Remember years ago we made that video called Warcraft is Dead? Oh, yeah. It's just like that. When everyone's like, WoW's dead, guys.

That was during Burning Crusade. Cataclysm 1. That was literally years ago. Yeah. People blow shit out of proportion just to make news out of it, essentially. Thanksgiving is now the third biggest shopping day of the year behind Black Friday and Cyber Monday. Online spending on Thanksgiving was up 29%. The terms Black Friday week and Black Friday weekend seem more prevalent.

No, they don't. They're stupid. That's dumb. That is very dumb. Don't use those. Yeah. Meanwhile, phone sales, I assume this is the sale of items over your phone and not actual phone sales, accounted for 46% of all retailer traffic on

thanksgiving that's just because no one wants to spend time with their family and they're busy looking at their phones yeah well and a lot of people eat and then they got nothing to do and then maybe they're visiting and then they like talk to their their cousins or some shit like yo you want to go black friday and then they just this is the grossest part of this black friday isn't just a day anymore it's a whole season barf puke it's terrible it's a whole season guys it's a whole season now also um there is a article on here oh my god i'm on business insider which if you've never been to business insider what a terrible, terrible layout for a website.

It sounds, oh, here it is. I found it. They have an article on here that says things not to buy on Black Friday, things you should not buy. Are you ready for this nonsense? Okay. Brand name TVs. That's one of the things most people buy. Yeah.

Don't buy those, it says. Toys. Don't buy toys on Black Friday. Okay. High end Yeah. Don't buy those, it says. Toys. Don't buy toys on Black Friday, okay? High-end cameras. Don't buy those. Winter coats. Linens and beddings. Christmas stuff.

Electronic accessories. Well, why? Literally everything on here that people buy on Black Friday, they're like, don't do it. Why do they say not to do it, though? Here's a great example. Don't go to a Black Friday event to buy an HDMI cable. Buy it online. No shit. What about

the TV? Everyone buys TVs. Why shouldn't you buy a TV? These will see even lower prices in late December as retailers make room for the next year's models. I heard a thing where I was streaming and someone in chat said they used to work for a big box type store

and they said a lot of the Black Friday TVs they get are really cheap because they outsource the work on them and a lot of the materials and so they get made very cheaply and they break very easily. Right, like I think the idea of Black Friday over the years has always been the concept of, hey, I'm going to get something that should be expensive for really, really cheap. Yeah.

And because businesses are both savvy and pure evil, they're like, yeah, yeah, sure, sure. We'll give you something really cheap here. And they give them the cheapest made product possible. But consumers assume they're getting a good deal. Yeah. Oh, I haven't actually bought anything on Black Friday in years, but I will go out

and watch people. Hell yes. Yes. I went out and watched people. Before you get to that, I just want to point out some things that are on Business Insiders. You know how they have those ads at the side? Yeah. Here's one great side ad scientifically proven features men find attractive in women and it's just a picture of jennifer lawrence you know apparently attractive people are attractive to men who knew there's one

down here this says how to fix your fatigue and it's literally just pictures of eggs it's just eggs there's another image where it says millionaire review reveals brilliant bitcoin trading method and it's this nerdy looking dude who's like i don't know this is this is the worst this is the worst website plenty of times where i've been fatigued and i've eaten eggs and nothing changed no i just felt kind of more tired because i'd eaten something like i wanted to go sleep there's another one that says sponsor link from the web scientist finds eco-friendly way to repel rodents in its picture of three dead rats cool cool i'm gonna i'm gonna click on this and

never return to that website do you miss all right anyway the internet when it had shitty ads, but they're like fun shitty ads. They're in clickbaity It was like the you want an Xbox 360 and then I'll let you play the little game where you like no no That was terrible. You would always end up with viruses only my god. This is the trick Okay, if it was like three shots and you win you clicked it twice and then you'd refresh and do it again Yeah, but you never actually won anything. It was all click scams. Yeah, but you get to play a little game for free. No, it's not a little game. It's a click scam

and you probably downloaded like 12,000 viruses. Only if you click the third time. I'll never forget when my roommate in college, I came home one day and he was on my computer and he was like hey, I think something's wrong. And I was like, what? And he's like, for some reason like hey I think something's wrong and I was like what and he's like for some reason every time I'm on your desktop I get ads

that's weird I'm like what'd you do and he's like I don't know and all the ads were like for like penis growth and like see tits live and I was like what websites did you go to and he's like dude I swear to god I was only on like yahoo.com

and I was like you liar were you jerking it at my computer and he's like no I would never do that meanwhile he totally was doing that yeah yeah there's no way you're just gonna get penis growth boob ads I was like okay cool so I literally had to reformat my computer I will say I will this time, I had, this is truly one of the greatest, one of the greatest losses in my life. Okay. During this time, I discovered what I still believe to be one of the greatest pornos I'd

ever seen. Right. Downloaded that shit. I was so happy it existed. I had to wipe my computer because of the virus he gave me. I have not found, I was like, I'll find it again. I have not seen it existed I had to wipe my computer because of the virus He gave me I have not found I was like I'll find it again I have not seen it since it vanished

It might never have happened it could have been a fever dream It's gone now Nothing will ever be as good as that was It's pointless I found love In college and now it's gone That was true love Between me and those three women,

it was a great video. It was a Black Friday day you'll never forget. Yep. Yeah, no, that happened more times than I want to admit in college, where friends would use my computer, because I was

the only one who, like, apparently out of my friends the only one who had a computer, which was weird, but I guess that was it I guess the early 2000s were a different time question mark I don't know like well I was the only one on my entire floor except for two other guys I was the only one with a computer everyone else had like gaming consoles and stuff but no one had any computers so I guess I was the nerd. I have no clue. But everyone would use my computer because on our server at school, there was a file system that was all like where weirdos would post the strange videos

they found online. And so they'd always go there and look. But of course, weirdos posting strange videos equals they're weird and gonna hack your computer. So my computer would always be filled with viruses. And I was like, what are you guys doing? Like, we went to this website and for some reason, when we clicked the download of thing, your computer got funny.. I was like, what are you guys doing? We went to this website and for some reason, when we clicked the

download a thing, your computer got funny. I'm like, oh my god. I never store things on there. I would always type up a paper and then save it on a drive of some sort. Every three or four weeks, I'd have to erase my computer and start again because they'd always download viruses. I was too much of a nice guy to be like

maybe you all should stop using my computer forever. Did you also wipe it down like physically? Nah, we were dirty boys. I didn't care. Literally one of our guys, one of our friends names was Chevetta who we called Chewbacca he was that hairy. So

really, really, really we didn't care It was It was it was college College is a is a gross time Where I one of the things I remember is in order to take a Shower in the dorm rooms I had to wear flip flops

Because I was afraid of touching the floor of the shower That's how dirty it was Jesus I was just like The floor of the shower is probably super gross. Someone wear flip flops. I mean, I feel like most showers would be pretty gross. Like, anywhere you go. I clean mine once a week.

I'm a crazy person. Well, not like, you know, not like at a person's house. I mean, like at gyms and like at dorms and shit like that. Yeah, I don't understand how someone can take a shower at a gym. That creeps me out. That's got to be the dirtiest, least sanitary shower situation. Although, I got to figure if I can make it to being old enough where I'm the old man who just lets his junk hang out,

then I'm doing good. That's my goal. I want to live long enough to be the old man who just like is at the gym who just lets his old balls hang. And he's like, yo, Steve-o, lifting them weights today? All right, cool. And then I pose. I do that like leg up on the bench pose and I air out my old man balls.

And I'm like, ew, what's going on there, young studs? But I have flip-flops and socks on, yeah. Yeah, you have flip-flops and socks. But nothing else. That's my goal if i can if i can get to that where i'm like 80 and just free balling that's the dream i see those guys and i'm like you've earned this you've earned this guys oh yeah so black friday yeah okay yeah you get computers everywhere now you know you don't have to be the only one with a computer.

You can look up your own weird things. It's all up to you. Oh, speaking of computers. Oh, my God. Did you see that Apple ad? No, but I saw you post about it. What is it? So, okay.

There's a commercial Apple has made. And it's this girl who's probably like, don't know 12 13 and she's got her ipad and she does everything on her ipad and then she's in her backyard and the neighbor lady or mom or whatever is like hey what are you doing on your computer and she's like what's a computer what that's it that's the ad that's the ad that's the ad and i was like what's a computer? What? That's it. That's the ad. That's the ad? That's the ad. And I was like, what's a computer? The thing you're using that's computing. I get, I get, I get that what the joke they're trying to make is.

And by the way, terrible joke. I get the joke they're trying to make here is that like computers are dead and everyone's using iPads. I get that. One, totally not true. Two, the concept of a computer doesn't just go away. That's like, what are you doing on your telephone? Just because you don't use it to ever make calls and you only text, we don't call it a textual box.

Right? It's a telephone. Just because you only take photos with it, it's not your camera. It's your telephone. Yeah. And like your phone, it's just a mini computer. It's such a mess. I just can't. It's so dumb. Yeah. And like your phone is, it's just a mini computer. It's such a, it's so dumb. Like we nailed them.

We should, you know what? Ads are getting stupid. Like stupid. I was watching over the holiday break. I was watching something on TV and it was commercial for Verizon and they had that guy who I don't like Who's from Silicon Valley Oh yeah

The guy who's like Hey I'm a quirky nerd Everyone Yeah that guy I assume he's a nice guy But he is perpetually on my TV As like I'm the nerdy one

So we get along right What's a guy You don't know I know what a computer is I just I want him to be a normal person and not like, guys, hey, I've got something to show you for Verizon Wireless. And so the ad is him coming in to a bunch of like tech nerds and he's talking about Verizon and Google phones. And he's like, we're like oil and

vinegar and they're like no that doesn't run with us like no that doesn't check out and they start doing like talking gibberish and he's like oh well then I guess we're like H2 and O and they're like yeah that'll do and he's like I figured that would work with you guys and he like scoots away on a scooter

and you're just like what commercial was that who was the audience of that commercial there were like four guys in silicon valley laughing their asses off at that commercial i was sitting there like who is the audience who who is the target audience this commercial i feel like it's terrible it's a tear all the verizon wireless commercials with that guy in it are like designed to get very tech savvy guys who live in one part of the country really excited about phones and that's it because they are unwatchable they're terrible commercials i feel like they're trying to copy that one ad they had i think it's the at&t girl where she's just like a quirky girl and you

go to buy a phone then he's just like oh but what could my phone do this and she's like get your cat and they're like oh the one the girl who was with verizon wireless all right i'm sorry uh can i tell you something what i wanted to say gordon ramsay but verizon wireless came out of my mouth you know the girl who's with verizon wireless and for some reason i had to pause and be like well that's not Gordon Ramsay's name. I think I just had a stroke. I think I just had a stroke.

What? I thought Gordon Ramsay. I said Verizon Wireless. And then you thought it in Mickey Mouse. This is the future where corporations silence you. You know who I hate? Everyone but Verizon Wireless. That's not what I meant to say at all.

Somebody help me. What did you even mean to say? Gordon Ramsay. I wanted to say Gordon. It's the girl who was in the Gordon Ramsay commercial, right? Wait. The AT&T girl who was like, Mr. Ramsay, she's in a commercial. Like the little tiny cute girl, right?

I think so. The girl who is going to play Squirrel Girl in the new Marvel series. Yeah, that's her. Yeah, that's what I'm talking about. Yeah, the little quirky girl. Yeah, absolutely. She's just like, have a nice day.

Then everyone's like, oh, jeez. That was awkward. She's so silly. Yes, yes. That girl. Who no longer so silly. And I was like, do-do-do-do-do-do-do. Yes. Yes. That girl. Who no longer does those commercials because she's Squirrel Girl now. I feel like it's just they've had a string of these types of fake employee actors where there's the do-you-hear-me-now guy. Who now works for Sprint and he's like, I used to work for that other company and they're Garbo now.

Yeah. It's like, oh, my God. Yeah. Who's that one, the insurance girl, Flo? Remember Flo? Flo? Remember this shit? What's her name?

Here's the thing. Here's the thing. I hate Flo, but, like, I'd hit Flo. I'd get up on, I'd take Flo out for a'd hit Flo. I'd get up on her. I'd take Flo out for a few dinners. She'd get you great deals. I don't know what that means. That was a creepy laugh.

That was undeserved. Yeah, she'll get me great deals. Yeah, she'll get me great deals, all right. That's weird. Okay, yeah. I still like those things. Neither do I. Agreed.

I think the vast majority of commercials are terrible. Yeah, they're very dumb. I don't know what my point was. Oh, yeah, it was just from all the Apple commercials and stuff. I just hate them all. Black Friday, though. Black Friday. Black Friday.

I went to a few places on black friday one was target i always like to go to target it's a nice like i usually find a few crazy people there and i didn't i wasn't disappointed this time there's a guy in the movie section and i don't know what he was mad about, but he just kept being like, that's the shittiest movie. That's the shittiest movie. And he was saying it really loud. And he was like, give me a dollar and I'll watch the movie,

but don't give me a dollar and I won't watch the movie. I like how a dollar is all it took. That is the shittiest movie. If you pay me one dollar, I will waste two hours of my life. And he kept reiterating it. He's like, that's the shittiest movie.

And then his friend was like, what about that movie? And he's like, that movie was okay, but that other movie was the shittiest movie. And I was like, what movie do you think he was talking about? I don't know. He never said it. and i kind of like looked around the movie section he was at i didn't see like there's a section was yet if you had to guess what movie was he talking about it was new releases so i don't i mean they all looked pretty bad all right hold on hold on hold on let's go new i'm solving this releases dvd i guess blu-ray new blu-ray releases all right

we got tricked this character-driven film considers the evolving sex trafficking landscapes i feel like that's not the one he's complaining about probably not valerian in the City of a Thousand Planets? No. Despicable Me 3? That's a strong contender. Strong contender. Possibly. That is a possibility. Pirates of the Caribbean, Dead Man Tell No Tales?

I don't think so. It's probably bad, but I don't think it's... Cult of Chucky? Maybe. Oh, I know what it has to be. What? The new Mummy movie, finally out on DVD. Oh, yeah. Oh, it's definitely that.

It's got to be that. It's definitely that one. That movie was terrible. Yeah. That was a bad movie. Maybe I agree with him. Maybe he's not crazy. Now that we know who's talking about the mummy, yeah, I agree.

Yeah. Yeah, but then the rest of Target of target i mean it's pretty all right they just people walking around someone was just like hey get the uh get the dvds and then they're like i don't want a dvd and people are just like ah that's just you know people being normal yeah yeah exactly there was this group of people that had a southern accent and he's like get the giraffe and then there's a bunch of stuffed animals and the one girl got the giraffe and then she like ran up to him mind you she's like 20 and then he like slapped her butt and he was like got that giraffe i forgot that he had.

You know what? I'm not going to lie. That's what I look for in a relationship. If I can be like, hey, babe, get that giraffe. And she's like, okay, I got a giraffe. And it's butt slap and then got that giraffe. I want in my life to say to a woman in a sexually charged way, got that giraffe.

Here's the thing. They were with like two other people, and the other guy was like, what about the zebra? I would have been like, yo, baby, get that zebra. I got a zebra, baby. Slap, got a zebra, baby. Slap. Got that zebra. I want that. You know what?

That's what I look for in a woman. A good giraffe. A good giraffe. Good, steady giraffe. A good, nice giraffe. With a great ass i like a giraffe with an ass what could i say um so yeah that was target uh really nothing else there then i went to the mall mall was the thing the mall was really crowded right but it was like a really it was like going on a really crowded saturday like it wasn't insane it was just crowded and there are like some people lined up for stuff like the

there's like the sephora or the pandora i still don't get pandora i always see pandora and it's like a bunch of what is pandora i don't know. Oh, jewelry. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like the jewelry thing. And it's always a bunch of people there. And it's, I don't know what they do. I think it's... Pandora at our mall has a sign out front that is the body of a woman and then a 3D face of a woman who like talks to you as you walk by. It's scary as hell.

It's terrifying. I feel, oh wait, I feel like somebody told me what they do It's like charms, but I don't oh that's right little like bracelet charms they're like this one is a baby rattle for our firstborn and this one is of a penis for how we made that baby slap Get that giraffe Because you've got a fine ass.

Yep, yep. Bringing it back. So is it like you just, I don't know, I guess you just pick out charms for a thing and you make a bracelet and then you're like, I picked out charms based on what we are. That's literally it. okay well it's like it's like if someone makes you a build a bear and they're like it's a bear but it's the doctor bear because you like doctors that's literally what it is it's the exact same concept okay well i guess i see some appeal but i still don't get like why it's so crowded i don't i don't know maybe i'm just not a charm person you aren't charming at all no yeah that's probably what it is

so yeah there's pandora everybody wanted to go there there was what's another store that's packed pink everybody wanted to go to the pink store get their you know what everyone yeah get them yoga pants that say pink on the butt yeah don't stare at it though yeah don't read it let's see what else what else i mean nothing great i went to abercrombie and i bought buy some more hipster clothes for your bearded lifestyle i did i bought more hipster sweatpants they're very comfortable but they're very like they're like more fashionable sweatpants one day they look like i care like a really nice dinner i want to go to a really nice dinner but we just go in sweatpants you go in sweatpants i'll go in a track suit

all right so i mean we'll go get a real nice meal i'll be normal and then you'll dress differently i went to a lot of places in sweatpants that are very fancy. I don't doubt that. I've hit the point where I don't even realize I'm wearing sweatpants anymore. It's just my everyday life. That's like me, except with just pants in general. Sometimes I just don't wear pants and I forget. It makes it weird when you ask about giraffes.

Well, I hate jeans. Okay. I thought you were going to continue with that thought. Is that it? You're just like, well, I hate jeans. Period. I don't like jeans. And like sweatpants.

They make, like these ones are pretty stylish. All right. And then there's like the ones you wear at home where they're like just kind of, they're like balloon pants. They're like the MC Hammer sweatpants. Right, right, right. If you, if you, your parachute pants. Yeah.

These are more like form fitting. They look like, oh, I'm, uh, you know, I'm going out. Form fitting? You have form fitting sweatpants? Yeah, they're more, they're like, uh. In what ways do they form fit, Crandor? Well, they're not like ballooned like... In what ways do they form-fit, Crandor? Well, they're not, like, ballooned out. Do they, like, do they hug the butt cheeks?

Is that what you're saying? I mean, I don't feel any hugs. Any giraffes down there? Maybe. There could be a few running around. I don't know. Could be a giraffe. I like that it's the fit of my leg. We're getting a lot of mileage off this joke. We're getting a lot of... Could be a giraffe.

We're getting a lot of mileage off this joke. We're getting a lot. Like they fit my leg. I know what you mean. Just form fitting is very creepy. No, they fit your form. It's like people buy clothes that fit them and then they look better. Because it's like, oh, I used to not do that.

I used to just buy whatever. But I'm like, oh, you can buy things like sweatpants and hoodies and stuff and they look better. That's why I wear my like yoga shirts. Oh, I got this yoga shirt. It was half off. Have you ever done yoga? Yeah. When?

A lot. All the time. Where? In my house. You know yoga forms? Well, yeah. Now, let me tell you about my yoga adventures. So I started yoga. When did you start this?

In junior year of high school. Whoa, I didn't know that. Yeah, and I did it because I was- This is actually a real thing. I thought you were about to say July. I was like, okay, that makes sense. That's crazy. Junior year of high school?

I was getting headaches, like tension headaches every day. You were getting tension headaches every day? Well, listen. What were you doing that was so tense? I was sitting at the computer playing World of Warcraft. All right. Understandable. Go on.

I think looking at the screen and sitting poorly was affecting my posture. And so, they were like, why don't you try yoga? And so, my mom had a yoga DVD. It was like beginner stress relief yoga. And I was like, alright, I'll give it a try. And it got rid of my tension headaches. And ever since then, I've been a believer in it. So, if I ever get stressed or anything feels tight, I just do yoga.

Alright, I'm not going to hate you for that. You actually deserve to wear yoga pants and or shirts yeah well you've earned it you've earned it yeah that'd be like if i showed up in a yoga pants and shirt and you'll be like no nope nope take them back you don't even earn those well I have, like, the homeless lumberjack hipster look. So when I wear my, like, sweatpants and yoga shirt, I look like I'm someone who would wear them. Do people ask you if you're, like, a Reiki shaman? Oh, my God. I've got another story. Okay.

I've only, like, half talked about Black Friday. So I went to Home Depot alright I had to buy a garage door opener Okay and the woman there Saw me and I was Checking out there was no self checkout Which you know I figure everybody Has self checkout now but they didn't so I go there

I do the thing and she's like nice hair And I was like thanks And she's like nice hair and I was like thanks and she's like are you an artist and I was like I mean I make YouTube videos do you consider that art and she is like it sounds like it'd be kind of cool like i don't know you could express yourself with that and i was like sure and then i was like do you do anything uh or do you do anything artistic or whatever and she is like i like to draw but i don't know if i could ever do that like all the time it's just like uh it's just a hobby and i was like that's cool can i get my garage door opener now and she's like yeah there you go it's like thanks and i just left i like that she saw you and said oh he must be a homeless

artist he's gotta be a homeless artist there's no doubt oh my god speaking of which our dear friend alex right he lives across the street from an art gallery and this art gallery every night for the last couple weeks according to him a homeless dude with a portfolio has been sleeping outside the art gallery and in the morning uh argues with the art gallery owner about putting his artwork up in the gallery. And the guy's like, get off my property. Don't come back. And the guy's like, but my art's good.

My art's good, man. So one day, Alex is coming home. And this guy's there. And he approaches Alex and is like, hey, man, you want to buy some art? And Alex is like, I really don't have the money for art. I'm sorry. And he's like, no, no, no. Like, please take a look at it.

I know you'll like it and alex because he's a nice guy is like okay dude opens his portfolio inside is like pieces of paper with like crayon and like colored pencils one piece of artwork is three pieces of paper stuck together. It's just, it's just literally the scribblings of a crazy person. And he's like, okay, well, I don't, I don't,

I don't want any right now, but like, you know, I don't have any money. And he's like, well, maybe in the future you'll have money. And Alex is like,

maybe. And he's like, well, okay. What if I come back and save you some pieces? And Alex is like, maybe. And he's like, well, okay. What if I come back and save you some pieces? And Alex is like, sure, dude, sure. And like walks away. In his mind, he has convinced this guy that he doesn't want any and that this guy understands that he's just being nice.

And this guy's mind, three weeks later, he comes knocking at Alex's door. And he's like, I brought you some at Alex's door. And he's like, I brought you some art to look at. And Alex is like, what are you doing here? And he's like, I saved some art pieces for you, and I created some more. And he opens his portfolio, and now it's like scribbling on the back of a piece of cardboard. Like, just

crazy stuff. And Alex is like, dude, you have to go. I'm sorry, you can't be here. So Alex is like, dude, you have to go. I'm sorry. You can't be here. So the guy leaves, and apparently he's just been outside of his house, just chilling there, hoping Alex will one day. Because Alex didn't say no. He's just waiting.

He's just waiting. And I'm like, maybe you should call the police, because this doesn't seem right, dude. And he's like, eh, he's no big deal. He's just waiting. And I'm like, maybe you should call the police because this doesn't seem right, dude. And he's like, eh, he's no big deal. He's fine. I don't know about that. I feel like he's stalking you at this point. Yeah, you gave him hope and now he's not going to let go.

You always hear those stories about the homeless dude who drew beautiful chalk artwork or did this amazing spray paint thing. But you don't ever hear the stories about the hundreds of thousands of other guys who are like, I doodled this for you. It's like a kindergartner's class project. That's what he was saying. He was like, it was not good. It was like scribbles. Like this guy just convinced himself he was good.

It was like scribbles Like this guy just convinced himself He was good I assume he's doing it to pass the time Because maybe if he keeps doing it And stops trying to sell it and starts actually Drawing more he'd be good Yeah well then again If you look at some art in places

I don't know how some of that stuff gets Bought and sold Can I tell you something we need to go to the modern Art museum here in la next time you're here holy crap i can't imagine how much fun that would be this is i like to call plywood with nail it represents our struggles in humanity there's one that's literally a mirror that just says bitch and i was like what So I just stood there looking at it. I was like, wait, so am I a bitch?

Like, what? Is this what it's saying to me? Yeah. So that homeless man could have did that. He would have made a fortune. Actually, you're right. No, you're right. They would be like, get out of here, crazy.

Meanwhile, if your name is like juliana first burger yeah your name is simone von dingleberry you literally that's art now it's like a crazy perm with a cigarette and like sunglasses where one is like fabulous all the time's a different color and there's like, bitch. Fabulous. It's beautiful. Transcendent. Transcending. Yeah,

I don't know. You know what? Maybe he's onto something. Maybe he should invest in the guy's art. You never know. Honestly, if we made it

a pet project to like, get him a black turtleneck and like, dye his hair bright white, I feel like he could sell some stuff. Yeah. So back to Black Friday. After the mall, I got my yoga shirt. I got my sweatpants.

I went to Best Buy, and that was easily the most crowded. Best Buy was insane. People buying TVs. Some guy had a big thing of tvs on a cart he's like coming through and he's like pushing it and it's like beep beep and then people are just going crazy the customer service were they ripping that were they ripping stuff off the cart well no again it was like if it's not black friday unless someone hijacks that cart and takes all the tv. Nobody did anything insane.

Nobody was like, ah, jumped at it. Maybe that article was right. Black Friday is dead. Boo! Maybe it is. Maybe it's become just mediocre Friday where you can still go out, but it's not the same. You know, beige Friday. Yeah, like a nice beige, boring, dull Friday.

And then that, I mean, that was really it. Then I went on Amazon and I bought some stuff because Amazon had some pretty good deals. Amazon has this thing where it's lightning deals and I feel the need to constantly look through them. I, there was a time in my life I was like that. I would go on there and like Groupon

and like all those places and be like, I gotta get deals. And I just stopped. I think I'd given up wanting things. Yeah. So I'm just like, I don't care anymore about that. Well, most of them I don't buy. And then there's always just one thing I get. Usually I pick out one thing and I'm like, I don't even want to be tempted by that stuff.

I hear you. But I mean, you could always use the best sports water bottle. No, I couldn't. How do you know because i'd rather pollute the environment with fiji bottle waters as we've discussed i mean you're not that's true well black friday you know what it might be just black november now maybe it's getting stretched out you know business insider is right stretching it out or was right what a great not at all terrible website oh no it's bad um okay well should we should we hit up our our usual standards

let us do so okay well let's go choppy coppers down the sky hey everybody how's that traffic it's going pretty good. It's actually pretty warm outside for end of November right now. Looking pretty good. Skies are clear. Days are getting darker, so you gotta watch out. It gets dark around like 4.30 now, so you better wake up early. Also, it does look like there's an accident on the 408. Looks like somebody crashed a clown car into a Black Friday mobile. You ask, what does that Black Friday mobile

have in it? Deals. I was going to ask that. It has deals. Crazy deals. And the clown mobile just has a bunch of mattresses. They're taking them to the mattress stores all around the area because there's a lot of them. That's a reference to a past episode. Back to you. Thanks, Crandor. Now let's go over to the weather desk how's the weather weather

is warm but don't take my word for it take whoppies four eight seven five two one two two no items to display Yeah 48752122 Is not Come on A98453 No items to display BAK B A

B A K A And Baka Baka? Bakanbegt, Indonesia, 78 degrees Fahrenheit. It is warm. It is warm there. You're right. You were right, Wafi.

It is warm. Feels like 78 high, 88 low, 76 UV index, 0.73 pressureure down 29.71. Visibility 9 miles today. Scattered thunderstorms tonight, cloudy. Thanks, Woppy. Thanks, Woppy. All right, let's go over to the sports desk. Sports.

Welcome to the sports desk. How'd the Packers do? You know, they didn't have Aaron Rodgers. Steelers. Steelers. Steelers. I need a little dance. You know, they didn't have Aaron Rodgers, and they still almost won. Aaron Rodgers, they would have won.

I didn't say the Steelers were good. They just won. Yeah. You're not wrong. To be fair, I thought the Packers were going to lose like 28-3 or something, but it was better than I thought. To be fair, the Steelers haveers were going to lose like 28-3 or something. But it was better than I thought. To be fair, the Steelers have Roethlisberger, so he is the worst. That's true.

And our defense is very bad. So hopefully we just keep losing and get a good draft pick. Also, other NFL games. A whole bunch of crazy stuff in the NFL. The Bills finally won. Good for you, Bills. So they're not completely out of it yet. You got the Vikings beat the Lions on Thanksgiving.

The Chargers beat the Cowboys. The Redskins beat the Giants. Falcons beat the Buccaneers. Cleveland lost again, so they're on their way to not winning a game. New England beat Miami. Tennessee beat Indianapolis. Bears got killed by the eagles seattle won la beat new orleans that was a good game jacksonville lost oakland beat denver how

are the rams good dude how are the rams good well the rams have not been good for a long time understandable but like they've only been in la a year well i mean it's not like they were an expansion team like they're the actual saint louis money yeah i don't know and they're getting better on defense and then they said a bad offense so they drafted their quarterback and then got some offensive linemen and now they can do well uh so that's why if you were wondering And then Crazy stuff over in the AFC West Chiefs and Chargers battling first place So are the Oakland Raiders, the Broncos suck now So it's kind of whatever

But yeah, Cleveland's 0-11 They're looking to be one of the only teams to ever not win a game Remember When Cleveland was so bad They stopped being Cleveland And became the Ravens What? Remember when that happened?

When Cleveland shut down The Browns stopped existing And became the Ravens I do not remember that When was that? When was that? In 1995 Oh wow

They relocated the Browns to Baltimore In 1996 Oh yeah And that's how they became the Baltimore Ravens Oh, wow. They relocated the Browns to Baltimore in 1996. Oh, yeah. And that's how they became the Baltimore Ravens. Yep. The Browns were so bad. Such a terrible team in a terrible town.

Look, I'm from Ohio. Cleveland, not a great town. Oh, my God. If you look at the cleveland browns record this is just a sports anomaly for anyone that wants to see this since 1990 they have went 3 and 13 that's 3 wins 13 losses 6 and 10 7 and 9 7 and 9 11 and 5 so that's one winning season uh any winning season is above 500. So that's above eight and eight, five and 11, two and 14, three and 13, seven and nine, nine and seven in 2002. So that's another one. Five and 11, four and 12, six and 10, four and 12, 10 and six.

That's three, four and 12, five and 11, five and 11, four and 12, five and 11, four and 12, seven and nine, three and 13, one and 15, oh, and 11. So they've had all of those seasons where they had a winning record were literally when they drafted in someone good and then immediately everyone who made that team good left because they were like, we need to get out of Cleveland. Yeah. It is...

That is three winning seasons. Cleveland ceased existing. It ceased having a team. Yeah. Because they were so bad. For three years, they didn ceased having a team. Yeah. Because they were so bad. For, was it 95? For three years, they didn't have a team.

So that's, in 25 years of playing football in Cleveland, they had three seasons where they won more games than they lost. That is, if you are a Browns fan, you are more dedicated than any, like, Chicago Cubs fan. Like, literally. Yeah. They've at least had winning teams. Man, you are more dedicated than any Chicago Cubs fan. Literally, it must be... They've at least had winning teams. The Mets. All those teams where everyone makes fun of them, fun of fans for being fans of them.

The Browns are literally just the worst. And if you're a fan of the Browns, bless you. You're in Ohio. You can easily just say you like the Bengals, and no one will care. Yeah. It's 85 to 89. The Browns did really well.

They made the playoffs every year. They were pretty good. And then just after that, it fell apart. Like the 70s and 80s were when the Browns and the Steelers became like rivals, right? Yeah. Yeah. Browns were good in the 70s, 60s. Browns were good up until the 90s and forever after that and then people decided they

didn't want to go to cleveland weird weird no one does that's true that means since 2015 even lebron ran away from cleveland for a while he went to party miami until he was guilt tripped back to going home. Yeah, that's in three seasons of playing football. So far, the Browns are four wins and 41 losses. Jesus. Four and 41. How can you keep up operational costs? Like, I don't know Who goes to those games Who stands in the stands

Dedicated fans That's it I don't know I do not know That's insane It is insane At least most teams have up and downs Where it's like okay well

For the next two or three seasons We're going to suck because We need to rebuild our team Yeah And that's just natural Every team goes through that where they're really really good Suddenly free agency or maybe They made it to the Super Bowl and lost so people are like

I'm done here and they That kind of stuff and then they suck for a few years That happens all the time but to suck for 25 years Is not okay And like you just look at some of the other Teams like for example, there's, let's see,

who's bad right now? Denver's not that good. The Colts aren't very good. The Colts don't even have Andrew Luck, but they're still 3-8. But the Colts also had great years for a while.

Yeah. The Dolphins, 4-7. The Jets, 4-7. They're not that good, but they've had pretty good years. Like, every team... What's the Bills record right now? Even the Bills are six and five right now.

Oh, my God. The Buffalo Bills, one of the crappiest teams there ever was. Yeah. Still doing okay. Yeah. I mean, the only team close to them is the 49ers, who are one in ten. But even they were in the Super Bowl a few years ago. Yeah.

The Niners are clearly on a we need to rebuild our team phase. It's obvious. So are the Giants. They're 2-9. Eli Manning's old. But they're just in the Super Bowl. Denver is just like all these teams that are bad were just in the Super Bowl. Now their team's gone or retired and they're on the rebuild.

Cleveland's just there. Good job, Cleveland. Yeah, you're doing it guys you're doing it uh i mean that's really sports all right what is our big new story of the day also we just shit on cleveland real hard listen build a better football team got Okay. So this is a story requested by many people. Flat Earth believer conveniently cancels homemade rocket launch. What? Wait, no.

I thought he was going to launch a rocket to prove that the Earth was flat. He was going to, and now it's been canceled. Weird. Okay. So, yeah. What's the backstory on this guy in case you've been blissfully unaware there are still seemingly large numbers of people who believe that the earth isn't actually round if you search for more than a few minutes you'll find plenty of shockingly sad so sad and poorly worded tumblr posts explaining all the reasons why you shouldn't believe actual

science and why a round earth makes so much more sense now one of flat earth's true believers wants to draw as much attention to the topic as possible he's going to do so by shooting himself over a Made rocket. Mike Hughes. Who has made it. I love his conviction. He doesn't need science to help him plot a course. He's just going to shoot straight up in a rocket and see how it goes. How do they realize we go, like, around the world?

Like, we can fly around the world. And time zones? And time zones, the reason why they work is because the earth is round like it okay yeah please continue all right Mike Hughes who has made it known that he doesn't quote believe in science has built a steam-powered rocket I don't get how you could just not believe in science. It's not like Wait, wait, wait! Steam-powered rocket? Steam-powered

rocket. This guy is so stuck in the past. He's like, golly gee, if I can get my temperature on this steam up, hot water will blast me straight to the moon! I just love how science is like, hey, we've done a series of tests and shown that

this is a thing and they're like, we don't believe it. That's because there are genuine idiots in the world. Like, it hit me over the last year. There are some very stupid people in the world who are genuinely idiots and you want to believe that everyone

sort of has some sort of i don't want to say high educational level but just common streetwise knowledge george i saw an alien ghost rocket ship i really i really should just listen to more coast to coast because clearly that's where the crazy people go to you should i still listen all the time and it's i still just as good that's where the crazy people go to you should i still listen all the time and it's i still just as good that's because you have it you have that thing that lets you listen during the day yeah i i can't stay up that late anymore and like just listen because i got stuff to do well yeah i got it because it skips all the commercials and then i just you can play whatever segment you want and so you'd be like I want to hear the crazy people.

And you just go, boop. And then it just plays it all. Yeah, I love when, especially when they have people on who, let's say they have a guest. And the guest is like, I'm talking about the power of crystal energy. Yeah, a lot of those. And then when they go to callers, they're like, George, that last guest was great. But let me tell you about aliens. And he's like, well, do you have any questions for our guest?

He's like, do aliens like crystals? Well, I think they might, depending on the Earth's curvature. I don't believe in none of that! Alright, well thanks for calling. Anyway, he's built a steam-powered rocket.

Of course he has. Which he intends to ride into the sky. His aim doesn't seem to be to put the flat Earth debate to rest. At the altitude he'll be reaching, he wouldn't be able to see much of a curve. And even if he did, it's not like he'd admit it, but rather to promote a flat Earth group that is helping to sponsor his flight. They just want to kill an idiot. Yeah.

That flat Earth group is just a bunch of murderers. They just want to kill an idiot. Yeah. That Flat Earth group is just a bunch of murderers. They just want to kill a guy. It's a picture of him. It says madmikehughes.com Research Flat Earth. Okay. If you are named Mad Anything, it's not

done out of like boyish joy or like that guy, he's really coy. No, you are a crazy person. Anyone named Mad Anything is just bonkers. Like, who's that guy? Like, oh, that's Mad Max McGee. Like, oh, he must be crazy. He is.

Good, I'm glad we decided to name him Mad Max McGee. He's one of the most logical down-to-earth people. Yeah, you're right. There are to name him Mad Max McGee. He's one of the most logical down-to-earth people. Yeah, you're right. There are no scientists named Mad Max McGee. Yeah, it's always like, I sewed a head into another body. All right, Mad Max McGee, whatever you say. It blinked. I have given life to this frog.

It'sed. I have given life to this frog. It's true. If you've ever debated a flat earther online, and if you haven't, I probably wouldn't advise it. Why? Why would you even? Logic and reason are completely lost. You'll usually reach a point where one of you says, if we could travel to space, you'd see the truth. The rocket Hughes plans to ride skyward isn't capable of such a feat, but it's better than nothing. As for the potential dangers of the flight, he's aware

of the risks. If you're not scared to death, you're an idiot. It's scary as hell, but none of us are getting out of this world alive. He is mad! he's not wrong this is our prison well die here while that may be true taking your life into your own hands with a steam-powered

rocket still requires a mix of guts and stupidity. Steam-powered rocket? How does that even work? Steam. Hughes certainly seems up for the challenge, though, as he's already performed a manned flight on a different steam-powered rocket back in 2014. That flight, which traveled nearly 1,400 feet, results in a lengthy recovery for Hughes due to the forces of the launch. He's hoping...

Wait, wait, wait, wait. He did this before. Yeah. Went 1,400 feet. Yep. 1,400 feet. Yep. Crashed.

Yep. Had a lengthy recovery. Yeah. And he thought to himself, I can make it a mile. He thinks things will go more smoothly this time around. But we know that's not going to happen because as this article says, he's cancelled the launch.

You know what? Maybe he's not so mad after all. He's sensible Mike. The man who's planning to launch himself in a homemade rocket to draw more attention to the round earth conspiracy when viral net and has now announced that the launch is canceled. Mike Hughes, a limo driver and stunt man who is no stranger to amateur rocket launches, revealed via a YouTube video that his launch plans have hit a couple of pretty serious snags. Go on. have hit a couple of pretty serious snags go on it seems that in all his preparation for the event he's failed to actually get written permission confirming that he was allowed to launch the

rocket i was about to say it turned out uh turns out that launching yourself a mile into the air in a rocket you built in your driveway does require a permit or two hughes claims he has contacted the local bureau of land management for permission to launch the rocket over a deserted patch of public land near amboy california and was told that it would be left up to the faa now local officials say they never heard from hughes and he most certainly was never given a permit for such an event he's also notes that the faa would never have permitted the launch anyway i just oh my god i clicked it's the video and he sounds like the ramblings of a crazy person

he's not like but he's like i think i believe what i do if you just put like a phone filter effect on him he'd be calling george right now yeah like take a look at that just put like a phone filter effect on him, he'd be calling George right now. Yeah. Like, take a look at that. Just give that a skim. Okay. Mad Mike Hughes has the hair of a crazy person. Yeah, he does.

I haven't even clicked the video yet. Oh, my God. Wait, is the music? Wait, hold on. No, this is someone else putting it over it. Oh, God. I thought the music was in the video. I was like, wait, is he explaining the FAA in the background?

It's like... Yeah. I thought this was part of the video he made. Well, I mean, that's the video he made. It's just this guy put the music over it. He's just like, you're told what to do it there. And I tried to do the racket, but the racket was just not good. Meanwhile, Vsauce has a video with 17 million views that says, is Earth actually flat?

Here's the thing. Vsauce. Is Earth actually flat? Here's the thing. Vsauce. I get you're supposed to be a science channel, but that is the biggest clickbait title in the world. Yeah.

In the world. Oh my God. On top of all that, the rocket launcher, which is a repurposed motorhome, broke down when they were about to transport it to the original launch site he said a few hours of work got the launcher back to its feet but overcoming the law is a bit more difficult it's not easy because it's not supported or it's not supposed to be easy the would-be rocket man says now hughes says he plans to use a new patch of land that is privately owned and that he's already scouted the launch site on Google Earth.

The new extreme. All right. Time out. Time out. Time out. I need to go back a little bit. Vsauce. Right.

Vsauce. Right. Vsauce has another video called, Did the Past Really Happen? What? You know what? I'm putting Vsauce on blast. You are literally clickbait now.

I don't know if you think you're like science-y and cool, but you are clickbait. You are literally clickbait right now. It is. I don't. They've become BuzzFeed.

I can't. I just can't even. Listen. All right. I have to click off of this. All of their things are like, what if the moon was a disco ball? I'm done. I can't. It's not science.

That's not science, Vsauce. That's not science. That is Vsauce. What if bears were people? What if people were bears? What if dogs could talk to you? What's the deal with dog? I mean, what's the deal with peaches?

What's the deal with airplanes? Why put peaches in a can? Kramer! Alright, what are we doing? I don't know. Apparently, the next launch is slated for this week, however. He wants to still launch this week. This guy just wants to die very badly.

You know what? We can check back in on him. Yeah, when he dies, we will memorialize him next time. I'll be like, I will remember you. And then you can just read quotes from the guy. All right. I mean, it sounds good to me. Done. That's a great podcast. That's a future podcast right there. Because it. I mean, it sounds good to me. Done.

That's a great podcast. That's a future podcast right there. That's a future podcast. Because it will happen. This guy is about to die. Yeah. Well, maybe he'll prove his point, though. Maybe.

We're all going to die. We're trapped here. This is a cage, man. No one gets out alive. Oh, crazy people. Make sure to, again, give us stories you want us to talk about when we talk about our five years of doing this crazy show. Yep. Well, we will get to that next episode because this is our fan Friday,

our Black Friday, whatever. Fan Black Friday, essentially. Yeah, this is our Black Friday show. But it's for the fans, I think. Yeah. That's how I'm going to justify that nonsense. Okay, well that's it. Thank you so much for listening. And if you're watching this on the

YouTubes, thank you for watching nothing, really. It gives me reason to go out on Black Friday. And we will see you next time. Please leave us all the ratings on iTunes And uh Just thank you for all your support As always

To be continued