Cox n' Crendor Show - Episode 153 - What is Mac n' Cheese?

Episode Date: May 7, 2018

The boys are back and this time they're talking about.... walking?! You know the nice weather hits when these nerds finally leave the house. Jesse learns that people still love taco mix and Crendor tries to impart Mac n' Cheese wisdom but Jesse is having none of it. Oh, and there's a mystery pooper! All this and more on this exciting episode of Cox n' Crendor! Thanks to Hims for sponsoring this episode. To start your month trial for just $5 visit http://forhims.com/coxED Thanks to MeUndies for sponsoring this episode. Get 20% off your first pair at http://meundies.com/crendor

Today's episode is brought to you by 4Hems. That's right, we have an update on my 4Hems progress. Oh man, an update. I know, I took the pills and the vitamins and the shampoo with me overseas. Which I don't know if that's legal or not. I don't know the rules, but we're going to find out. I'm still doing it. I said I would keep doing it.

I'm going to let you know. I'm going to let you know. We'll talk about that later. Also, today's episode is brought to you by me undies. Undies that are on me right now. Orp for pirates. Me undies. Ired is true. I'm sitting in London wearing me undies and they can't take them from me because I love them so much. We'll talk about that later in the show too. All right, let's get this thing started. Hello, everybody.

It's time for Ghost on Trending. This is Trending in the morning. In the morning. Broadcasting live, live, live, live, live. In four-hour recording studios. Recording. Wake your ass up. It's up and Crandor in the Morning. Wow, you went from the previous episode, where you were like, and now you're like,

Hello, welcome to Cox and Crandor on KBBR Jazz Radio 5000. That's right. How's it going, everybody? It's me. Today we're going to be bringing you the finest Wolfman Jay and Crandog in the hour. Hello, it's me, Wolfman Jay. I don't know. I don't know what that was. Yeah, I know.

I don't approve of that either. Wow. Hey, what's going on, dude? Hey, I'm happy because it's actually getting warm here. Normally it's cold, but now in the Midwest and the East Coast and all that, it's getting warm. We got like 60s, 70s. We hit 80. It's actually fun to go outside again.

I've been walking. Yeah, it's very hot here. But not like LA heat where you're dying, but just like a nice... Yeah, ever since I've been in Europe I've been on the walk around train So I'm walking around seeing stuff It's pretty great Yeah, and like When you're over here you got more of that humid heat

Not like Florida, Florida's like that all the time LA's like It just bakes you in the oven Like it puts you on broil And you're just like, ah, I'm just Feel that heat, but I'm not like drenched Yeah, you're like a whopper Yeah, you're like a whopper. In LA, you're like a whopper.

And in Chicago, you're more like a griddle cake. Yeah, you're more like a Polish sausage. Yeah, you're like boiled and then fried on a griddle. Yeah, exactly. Exactly, exactly. And in LA, you know, you're just processed meat with fake grill marks put through the broiler. I would love to go to an actual Burger King, like, kitchen. Is anyone out there listening right now?

Have any of you worked at a Burger King? Question. Do they actually use a grill or do they just mash it and make it have lines? How does it work? How does it work? How does it work? It's like the McRib. Yeah, right? So they got the fake marks.

Does it come pre-marked? I feel like it probably does. But if it doesn't, that's kind of cool. True. I just wonder how they can still be so bad. How can Burger King continuously be terrible? Every two-ish years, I decide to get Burger King. and every time it's the worst decision I've made of the year. Oh, my God.

Yeah, no, I'm the exact same way. I, last year sometime, driving back from Burbank, which, as I'm sure I've said on this podcast before, but I know I've lived this life many a time and said it to many people. I know I've lived this life many a time and said it to many people. If you have to drive from anywhere north of Hollywood, any time after 6 p.m., you might as well plan on never getting home until, I don't know, the next day. It is the worst drive in the world. And so I was like, all right, I'm not going to get home in time for any good dinner,

so I'm just going to grab something to eat before I get on the highway and then just eat it while I drive. Right. And so I saw a Burger King. I was like, oh, Burger King. I haven't been there in forever. Pulled in. I was like, hmm, what will I get? I was like, oh, you know what? I'm going to get a Whopper Junior, no mayo because I hate freaking mayo, and like a cheeseburger like a just a normal cheeseburger and they had a

deal for like right the super cheeseburger and i was like i don't know what the hell that is but i'm gonna try it i can't tell you how gross the cheeseburger was 99 ketchup and mustard the pat it was so good like when i squeezed down the burger it just oozed out the side the burger didn't taste like hamburger it tasted like uh vinegar or whatever like the base you know in ketchup vinegar and tomato sauce i guess is what it is but it just didn't taste right and then the whopper junior the lettuce was wilted and gross and i just yeah haven't been back and that was sometime last summer i think so again burger king what the hell you doing yeah there was one time it was right before this podcast i went and got burger king it was raining out as they are i was good okay i got a whopper junior

speak of the devil and then i got some fries i was like all right i ate it i was like this was pretty okay i don't think i'd ever want to eat it again though And then I felt Just bad like I just felt Low energy my stomach kind of hurt My gallbladder probably got Stonified That could have been what did it

And then uh Never been back since Gross it's just not pleasant Oh my god I also tried Their mac and Cheetos the one time because I was curious. You told me about that, I think. Yeah? Yeah. It was bad.

It tasted like if you took a Cheeto. All right. You took a Cheeto. You hollowed it out, and you stuffed it full of, like, Easy Mac, like, really bad mac and cheese, like the really shitty kind kind and then let it sit for like two days and you ate it and i was like normally i'll eat something that's bad and i can like eat a few of them and be like or like be like that's okay but this was like i really don't want to eat this it was just it was really bad like above and beyond what normal bad

is and i don't get how so many people liked it i guess because it was like a meme type of thing like mac and cheetos it's like macaroni and cheetos what was that uh taco bell that was like doritos chicken chicken doritos chicken nachos is that what the hell that shit was? Yeah, it was Chicken Nachos, I think. Well, whatever it was. I remember I was like, I have to try this. Every time they come up with something wacky, I have to try it. Like the one that was a sandwich, but it was two pieces of chicken. Yeah.

Every time they do that, I have to try it. And so I saw these and had to pull in. And what they do is they give you maybe six chicken Doritos, chicken nacho things, and then cheese dipping sauce. So I sat there and I tried to enjoy it. It was the driest, grossest piece of chicken I've ever had. And the cheese sauce couldn't save it. I tried.

You can only dip so much. They only give you so much cheese sauce couldn't save it. I tried. You can only dip so much. They only give you so much cheese sauce. And, and, oh, it was not, it was not good. It was,

I feel like maybe they should stick to just making tacos. Well, they actually did fries and their fries were pretty good. I've not tried the fries. I feel like it's weird to get fries at a Taco Bell. Nacho fries. I did, too, and then I tried them. I was like, you know what?

These are better than Burger King. Well, that's not a hard. Yeah, I was about to say you didn't really convince me. Speaking of Mexican food, even though Taco Bell is not Mexican, a lot of people message us and said that they make tacos the old way with the seasoning mix and stuff. Oh, yeah. And I was dumbfounded. You know what? Maybe we're just coastal elites now.

Maybe we are coastal elites. Maybe we're just Ivy League kale-eating coastal elites and we don't get it. Then again, I think I've always been a coastal elite wherever I've been. I just, I just, there's easier, healthier ways than making the food with the packet. Even mac and cheese that we talked about. Yeah, I hate using those packet things. Even mac and cheese, the Kraft mac and cheese, there's many other things in the mac and cheese aisle

that are closer to actual mac and cheese than the Kraft mac and cheese. There's many other things in the mac and cheese aisle that are closer to actual mac and cheese than the Kraft mac and cheese. But people still love the Kraft mac and cheese. I don't get it. I don't understand why. I don't. I think it tastes terrible. But maybe it's just a comfort thing. I don't know.

I don't know. It might be a comfort thing. Like a nostalgic Kraft. Like I had this when I was a kid. They got you with the marketing and the uh nostalgia much like our old videos that nobody wants to be around here they're still sticking around for nostalgic reasons we're the craft macaroni and cheese of podcasts that's damn right we are like i made all I did was I bought some macaroni.

I got some like shredded cheese. I like sprinkled it over the macaroni and then I put some more on top. And then I put some more cheese and just melted and it was great. But you're supposed to, in my mind, it seems like it's so much easier to just, you go out, you get some cream, you get some cheese. And then you put that in a saucepan and you melt the cheese down into the cream and then you make the noodles and then you put the noodles on a pan you pour the cream over that then you put cheese and stuff like shredded cheese on top of that you bake it and you're done that's literally you're done and you have real mac and cheese yeah let's look i mean i mean, I did the easier one.

It was just like I cooked the noodles, I put cheese on it, and it melted. It was good. That's like some bootleg mac and cheese. That's some booty mac and cheese. That's like some Guy Fieri. That's just noodles with cheese on it. That's not mac and cheese.

That's just noodles with cheese. It's technically mac and cheese. No, it's not. That's noodles with cheese. You took noodles. It's mac. It's got with cheese. You took noodles. It's got the mac. It's got the cheese.

You took noodles. What else do you want? No, no, no. You put noodles and then cheese on it, and that's it? It wasn't even creamy. You just put. You don't need creamy. Sometimes I cut up some jalapenos, too, for spice. It's just.

All right. You know what? I'm going to say say People listening right now Vote Tell us At Jesse Cox At Crendor

You need to tell us Is Kraft mac and cheese Better than Crendor's mac and cheese No I need to know an answer That's not even a debate That's not even a debate This is debatable

This is One of those Looks like mac and cheese One of them is like mac and cheese. One of them is noodles with cheese on it and maybe jalapenos. In fact, I think I probably tweeted it at some point. Hold on. Crandor mac and cheese.

It's got to be here. I'm pretty sure. I don't believe that at all. Not at all. Hey, I found it. All right. Send it. Send it to me. There I'm what I need to see this and Kobe Jack cheese jalapenos red peppers and orange peppers okay that again is noodles with peppers and like what you've created cheese you see the cheese dripping off I see I see that that's shredded cheese dripping off of it. I see the shredded cheese dripping off of it.

I do. But, by the way, for people wondering, this was April 9th, 2015. It's at 2.09 a.m. You don't got to go into detail about it. At 2.09 a.m. I just want to point out for the record this what you've created is a pasta dish this is true with right peppers and jalapenos you

have bell peppers in there orange peppers and what you've done is then you sprinkle cheese on it you've created a more of a fresh Italian dish than an American mac and cheese I'll call it Cren Cren Cren's mac and cheese it's not macaroni and cheese it's not it is it doesn't fit this this isn't the context of my this is

booty cheese this is booty mac and cheese and I refuse to accept it this is real this is real mac and cheese no this is a noodle dish this is a fine it's probably no way it hurts so much? Because it was real That's a reference to a movie Yeah I know I'm aware

I'm aware of what that was Alright well That all happened Oh yeah So Yesterday we went to Nando's You went to Nando's? Wait how did you went to Nando's You went to Nando's Wait how did you go to Nando's

Oh they have like a bunch of Nando's in Chicago now What Yeah there's like a billion of them Well I went to Nando's yesterday too so Well we went to Nando's Line was packed out the thing It was like a 30 minute wait But I was like it's alright

So we got the nando's extra hot sauce i was ready and then i got they had this crazy ass sandwich where it was like they take the chicken they put it on garlic bread and then they put coleslaw on it and i was like oh my god give me that so i got that and i put extra hot on it and we sat next to these two people And one of them looked like Lil Wayne And the other one Go on Looked like A very large woman Wait what

Okay alright sure sure But it was weird cause like she was like A very large and in charge woman I just like how you described this And he was just like a really really skinny Lil Wayne with sunglasses I just the way you described this is so funny Cause you're like, yeah, so there was Lil Wayne and then, no, I'm sorry, a man who looked like Lil Wayne and then a woman who looked like a very large woman. So it was, I don't, you could have just said Lil Wayne and then a large woman. Instead you said, looked like Lil Wayne Looked like a large woman

Which to me I don't know what that means I don't She could be an alien Yeah yeah okay Dude she had a really long face too It was like Imagine a long john But as a face

You know what I mean What Like the donut a long john You know how it's like a really Like imagine that I'm not even joking You know how it's like a really, like, imagine that. I'm not even joking. You're making me have to go look up long john donut. You don't know what a long john donut is?

Okay, I know what a long john donut is. All right, yeah. Okay. Imagine that. No one's face looks like this. It did. I swear to God. You say that now.

If you saw her face It looks like a long john face Nobody's face It was like her mouth was way down And her eyes were up It looked like one of the Spongebob fish Nobody looks like

Nobody looks like this Spongebob fish Nobody looks like long john I'm looking at them right now Nobody's face is shaped like this. This is Spongebob fish. Nobody looks like long jaw. I'm looking at them right now. Nobody's face is shaped like this. Nobody's face. It's like a long fear, like the Spongebob fish, like that.

Nobody's face looks like this. A really long face. It did. By the way, the more I look at this Spongebob fish, the more it looks like Thanos. He does a little bit, yeah. Yeah. If someone at this Spongebob fish, the more it looks like Thanos. He does a little bit, yeah. Yeah.

If someone finds the Spongebob fish, paints him purple, send it to us. It's basically Thanos. Fred the Fish is his name, if you're wondering. Anyway, sit down. For those concerned with canonical purposes of Spongebob. And then on the other side of us were just like two people that were like looked like redditors you know it was just they're like looking at their phone playing youtube clips sure you know typical typical redditors damn teens yeah damn teens so

i didn't pay attention to them so this woman she is just like hey I think that woman over there is a lesbian. And I was like, what? And she said it twice. And then the little Wayne guy was like, heh, heh, heh. And I was like, what? They were like, I don't even know who they were talking about. They were talking about somebody in the back of the kitchen or something. Or like where you order your food? And she said it twice.

And then this woman comes out. And she's like, hey, is everybody okay? And they went to the one table. They're like, yeah, we're fine. They went to our table. They're like, yeah, we're fine. Then they go to that table. And she's like, barbecue sauce.

What? Yeah. They're like, hey, how's everything over here? And she's like, barbecue sauce i was like what yeah they're like hey how's everything over here and she was like barbecue sauce did they need it or they should have it at nando's i don't know but nando's doesn't have barbecue that's not i know but she's like all right we'll get you barbecue sauce but i think she just went and like got some random sauce for or or something. She was like, my chicken's too hot. And she said her chicken was too hot. This sounds like... This is why we don't deserve Nando's in the States.

We don't deserve it. No, we do not. Then it got better. They brought her her barbecue sauce or whatever they gave her. And she's like you have ranch And they're like no You cannot ask for spicy stuff And then ranch to counterbalance it

You pick one or the other I'm tired of it I'm tired of this shit The best part she's like do you have ranch And she's like no we don't have ranch here And she's like She did that Like visibly like audibly loud Like, no, we don't have ranch here. And she's like. She did that, like, visibly, like, audibly loud, like.

All I'm imagining now is someone who just is in those let me see your manager videos that you see online. Yeah. That's. Yeah. That's who I'm imagining. So they must have went and told the manager because then he came out and he was like, hey, is everything everything all right out here? And she was like, you guys don't have ranch. And he's like, no, we don't have ranch here. And she's like, all right.

My chicken was too hot. But, you know, whatever. Whatever. And he is like, I can give you like a coupon or something. And she's like, no, it's fine. And then he left. and then they went back To talking And I was so confused

But I was so entertained I My Nando's trip I went to Nando's for dinner last night And what What the hell did I There were two guys sitting next to me so they sat me and what I assume is the dude area because right they walked me through

numerous tables of men and women women kids families to this back corner that was all guys and it was like two guys sitting together talking, one guy by himself, like two other guys, but like a group of guys. And then they sat me down. So I sat next to these two guys who were talking. And I'm not sure what the proper terminology is for these guys. Chavs?

Something British that means these. Something British these means Something Something British These guys are douchebags But basically They sat there the entire time Talking about how There was A guy at work

Whose girlfriend They thought were both hot Or they both thought They thought were both hot No They both thought Was hot And they were trying to figure out a way

To get them to break up And so It was Like watching an episode of it's hot and they were trying to figure out a way to get them to break up and so it was like watching an episode of some teen drama that i definitely don't watch and them trying to connive and figure out a way to get them to break up but then about halfway through the conversation they realize their plan had a major flaw because they're sitting there and they're talking like, yeah, so what we can do is we can like get him to get in a fight and then she'll be like all lonesome. And then we take her out to a ball and then bing, bang, boom. She's sleeping with me.

And the guy looks at him and he's like, yeah, but I think she's hot, too. And the other guy's like, yeah, but we got to take turns. He's like, I don't want sloppy seconds. And they literally proceeded to get in a fight over who would get with this girl first. It was such an amazing moment to see two guys create a plan to get a girl. Then realize, well, you can't share her. Meanwhile, somewhere in the world is this boyfriend who has no idea there are two guys at Nando's eating like half chickens,

planning to steal his girlfriend. It was incredible. And I just sat there eating my wrap, like staring forward, but listening to everything they're saying. And I wasn't even trying to pretend like I was on my phone. I was literally looking straight ahead, like giggling to myself, eating a wrap. And the only thing in front of me was, you know how they have the wash basin and they have the rack with all of the different sauces? That's what was right in front of me.

So there's nothing to look at. And I was just like, yeah, okay. Just eating. Oh, it was so funny. It was so dumb. So there's nothing to look at. And I was just like, yeah, okay. Just eating. Oh, it was so funny. It was so dumb. He's like, oh, so what? That's some prime cheeky Nando's.

Oh, it was super cheeky. They were just like, so what we got to do is we're going to get him into a fight and then bing, bang, boom. I'm going to sleep with her. That is almost verbatim what he said. It was incredible. Bing, bang, boom. Bing, bang, boom. Yeah.

It was great. Nando's is was great nando's is amazing nando's is amazing the thing is with this nando's like the american one uh you can tell some of the food things are different like they don't have the the thick chip fries they got they got like fry fries yeah oh that's like when i was in austral I went to Nando's. They had that too. They didn't have the chips. Yeah. See, the Australian one's probably more like what I get. I didn't like the Australian one as much. I went to two Australian Nando's and they were both totally different from each other.

One of them gave me, when I got a wrap and I got it extra spicy, one of them, they gave me like a cayenne wrap and I was like, whoa. That's weird whoa This is weird Yeah that's crazy Australian But uh Yeah oh my god

So again for those of you who are wondering I am overseas And um I spent the last I don't know Couple weeks now Two weeks In both Poland and In uh amsterdam and amsterdam was crazy uh did you go to the prostitute museum i'm gonna let you know no i didn't i i know i know uh so

i'm gonna tell you something right now don't do this. I may have had a pot brownie, and it may have destroyed me. It was so good. And I was like, oh, man, this doesn't even taste like it has weed in it or anything. And so I ate the whole thing. And you're only supposed to have a bite. I know, man. It was a good brownie, though. And I was out of reality for a good day and a half.

And so the last day, I was only there for two days, so I didn't get to see it. But I saw all the other sites, and I went around, and it was awesome. But, yeah, I didn't make it to the red light district. It's been the perfect time to go to the Prostitute Museum. Look, I'm aware. I failed. It's a big failure on my part i uh i'll have to make an effort next time yeah i didn't even go to the red light district at all which is which

is very unlike me yeah you know i must have been on something because i did not go there even at all that is unbelievable yeah i've been walking around around London, and the weather's been beautiful. And today, I decided to go for a walk, and I wanted to go to the Borough Market, which is that cool market that's sort of under London Bridge. And walked my ass off. Walked 45 minutes to get there. Because I was like, it's a beautiful day. I don't want to take a tube. I'm just going to walk.

Walked 45 minutes. Got there. It was closed. It is not open on Sunday Apparently it's a bank holiday Everything's closed Today and tomorrow I was like

Oh Okay So I decided to Go into a prep To get Like a sandwich And then I was like Well

You know what Screw it I can do this exercise I'm going to walk back But I think I'll take A different way Terrible Terrible mistake Worst mistake I got lost It was a 45 minute walk exercise i'm gonna walk back but i think i'll take a different way terrible terrible mistake worst mistake i got lost it was a 45 minute walk to get there i got lost for the next well i thought

i knew where i was for about an hour right and then two hours after that i was lost in downtown london in the financial district there's nothing but me and skyscrapers. There are maybe four people. I maybe crossed four people the entire time. There was no one there. And I couldn't figure out which direction to go. So I knew I had to head west. So I walked north and west. And then ended up at the Globe Theater, which meant that I had gone south, which is not west.

I don't know how I got there. Ended up going over the Millennial Bridge, which is that bridge that I think is destroyed in Harry Potter. And then walked west more into the point where I got to Piccadilly Circus. I said, oh, well, I'm very close to where my hotel is. Nope. Wrong. I turned the wrong way. Ended up going. I was lost all day. I'm in a city notorious

for fog and rain and clouds and I'm pretty sure I got a sunburn. My whole body hurts because I was outside so much. I left at like 10am and didn't get back Until maybe 5

And all I wanted to do was go get lunch at Borough Market And ended up spending all day wandering the city I still You figure you would Know where to go after that Nope still couldn't tell you where I was today I was so lost I just kept wondering

And part of me was just, just find a subway, find, find a tube stop. And Lord knows I tried. And every time I thought I found one, it, it just wasn't in front of me. There'll be signs that said like, Houston is this way. I'm like, oh, cool. All right. So I can get that one that heads South. I can get, nope. There was no tube stop. I didn't see one. And so I was lost all day. I was so gross and sweaty and awful. And my apologies to everyone in this city. As I was like marching through it,

like, so gross. Yeah. It's. Yeah. I've actually walked a lot too, since it's nice out. And then my car had to get fixed because it was raining the other night, like pouring rain, like crazy rain. So I was like, all right.

And then I was driving and this one intersection thing was blocked off. There's like a cop car there being like, hey, this is flooded. And I was like, all right. So it's dark. I can't see anything. So I'm like, I'll just turn around. So I go to turn around and I hit a big ass thing of water

and I was like oh okay cool and it was like it wasn't like super high but it was high enough to like be like and then after I went through that the car started being like like the and it was like juttering did you flood your transmission or something what happened well I took the mechanic.

So I had to, they're closed that night. So I took it the next day. And he's like, it sounds like transmission. So they looked at it. And he's like, we thought it was transmission. Turns out there was like water in the engine. And it was like doing something to the air filter. And then it couldn't like get the air through.

And he's like, I'm surprised you could even turn it on I was like oh cool so they fixed it it's like foreigner bucks which I thought it'd be more than that so I was actually happy and yeah he's like I mean we changed the oil with it we did another thing for like whatever it's like the part was like like 250 300 so i was like all right whatever and then uh it works fine now but i was like huh never gonna ever drive through water again but it's not like i even wanted to drive through the water i was like oh it's blocked off so i had to turn around and just hit another thing of water i feel for you because i've done that before but since i moved to la i haven't there hasn't been enough

water on the ground for any of that to happen now it's like weird dust things i'll i'll leave for a week come back and my car's covered in dust and i'm like cool cool i like thunderstorms though thunderstorms big thunderstorm thing yeah just at night like nighttime thunderstorms are great i love that i we haven't had one of those i it's been years since i've experienced a nighttime thunderstorm that's actually i couldn't deal with that i love my nighttime thunderstorm i'll go like i'll walk outside in the rain just let it hit my face and be like ah slightly polluted rain ah that's right get all in there get all in my pores right and then since uh i had to wait at the mechanic didn't have a car i just walked around everywhere so i got breakfast at a place

because i had to wake up early to take it in early and i got like uh i got like some cinnamon it was like cinnamon bread french toast they made it was a mama mia yeah it was really good and then i watched that thing you tweeted it was like the asian ad with the gum amazing ad a very good ad i watched that while i was eating and then i just walked around it was great i got exercise i got my 10 000 steps in i was rolling my god i hold on hold on i need to my phone. You know how many steps I got in. All right. Yeah, that day I got 12.5K steps. Let's find out. That's better than my typical like 3,000 I'd got before that.

Let's see where I'm at. I got 8,800 yesterday. Dude, I'm on a step craze. I got to go walk. Oh, today I walked five miles. Oh, my God. Did 10,561 steps. That's not bad.

That's not bad. Yesterday. I only walked two miles and did 6,000 steps. If, as long as you're like around 10,000, here's the crazy. So Wednesday, the day that I Wednesday, the day that I walked around Amsterdam and,

uh, imbibed in a pot brownie 22,881 steps 13.3 miles That's like That's like convention levels Where you're just non-stop walking I like to believe That at a certain point in the day I just no longer cared.

I was like, I'm good, man. Let's just keep walking. Let's keep walking, man. 22,000? I've actually – 22,000 is what I do daily. Oh, I know that's true. The most I've ever walked in London, as far as I'm aware, is that time my mom took me around.

We walked 16 miles in a day, and I did like 25,000, 26,000 steps. That was crazy. Dear God. It was so gross. I look back here, like PAX South from the past PAX South, 2017. I did 14,000, 14,000, 17,000. Jesus. Like conventions, you walk a lot.

I think it's really funny. There's one day, I'm going to assume this day I didn't have my phone on me because I've been going back through. Yeah. And most days I'm at like 5,000 steps, something like that, which is pretty bogus. You're supposed to do 10,000, But that's like because I'm sitting. There's one day, Saturday, the 21st of April. I'm going to assume I didn't have my phone on me because it literally says I walked 834 steps. Oh, I have one day I walked 173.

I didn't even move. Yeah, this has to be. Friday the 20th, I walked one step. There's no way. I must have left my phone. There's no way. One step? It's not even possible.

Let me tell you about the fun of gallbladder surgery. 97 steps, 152 steps, 49 steps, 95 steps. Jesus. Then I hit 890. Then I hit 1,000. Then you came back? Then I hit 1,400. Then I came back with a vengeance until I hit 890 Then I hit 1000 Then you came back Then I hit 1400 Then I came back with a vengeance

Until I hit 700 And then I came back with a vengeance Yeah, you came back and you killed it Speaking of comebacks Oh, perfect segue Speaking of comebacks And taking care of yourself Did you know

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That's F-O-R-H-I-M-S dot com slash cox. 4hims.com slash cox. All right. So should we jump into Chopter Copter 7? I'm going to get this right this week. This is the time i do it all right all right now let's go to chapter seven this guy's going on cred or how's that terrific out there i did it damn all right you're back in track that was uh that was kicking it old

school you like went back to your youth um all right well looking out here weather's getting nice everywhere except la it's getting really hot so you don't even want to go outside. In Vegas, it's like 180 degrees or something. You're going to die if you go out there. Don't even do it. It looks like people are getting ready for summer vacations. People are getting ready to graduate, so the traffic is getting a little insane. It's going to start backing up.

It's going to start polluting the environment. And you know what? Get out on your yacht. Get out on your canoe. Get out on whatever you got go paddling get away to the international waters and uh make your own island set up there have some fun you know go gambling uh also our lawyers say i do not promote this type of behavior you should not do it don't follow anything i say back to you thanks crendor now let's go over to the weather desk. Crandor, how's that weather? Whoa, weather.

I just wanted to say one more thing. Uh-huh. I was at Starbucks. Okay, go on. And you know how I was talking about Starbucks water? Yes, I saw you post about Starbucks water. I did. It was my 100th Instagram post on my Instagram Crandor was taken with that promotion and I learned at Starbucks as I was waiting

there that they filter their water three times three times that's that's three times the filtration that's three times the filtration cuz the girl asked she's like hey do you guys filter your water? And the guy's like, we filter it three times. And she's like, oh, okay. He's very like, how dare you even question that? How dare you? We filter it

three times. And I was like, that proves it. That proves that it's not just me. It's the water that tastes really good and looks good. It's good water. That is. That's impressive. That's very impressive.

I'm worried that it needs to be filtered three times. That says a lot about the water supply in the States. But yeah. They filter it three times probably for the taste of the coffee and the drinks. Oh, what did I watch the other day? I watched a video where these guys, it might have been one of those channels that probably deserves the credit, but I'm not going to give it to them because I don't remember.

But it was these guys filtering a Mountain Dew. Whoa. And when it came out the filter, it didn't have the yellow coloring anymore and it barely tasted like Mountain Dew. They said it tasted like a day-old LaCroix. which is crazy to me that is

pretty crazy yeah now i want to just start filtering things like start pouring drinks through a filter and see what happens i do too that'd be a great youtube channel just go out and buy well i'm pretty sure that's what this youtube channel is they just pour things through a filter so it is an original idea But I just want to do it just because I imagine Just to taste it Yeah just to figure out what stuff tastes like through a filter Yeah I bet Coca-Cola just tastes like

The flat I don't know Sparkling water or something It clearly removes the coloring And some of the sugar But I don't understand how filters remove carbonation i don't either i guess it would remove the like well what makes something carbonated i don't even know that's gas right so it's like get rid of the gas yeah

i guess the gas starts going away once you pour it. I don't know. I don't know. I guess the filter blocks the gas bubbles, question mark? The filter absorbs the gas through the powers of science. The filter absorbs the gas. Then it removes the good-tasting Mountain Dew taste. Before you know it, you're left with a husk of a Mountain Dew. All Dew, no Mountain. And I sure do love my Dew. All dew, no mountain. I sure do

love my dew. Oof. Do the weather already. Oh yeah, weather. P-A-K Shanghai, Punjab, Pakistan. Wow, okay.

82 degrees Fahrenheit. Partly cloudy. Feels like 84 degrees Fahrenheit. Wow, okay. degrees fahrenheit monday 98 degrees fahrenheit monday night 72 degrees thunderstorms tuesday 94 degrees tuesday night 73 degrees winds northeast 13 miles per hour humidity 58 percent uv index zero of 10 sunrise 5 16 a.m sunset 6 49 p.49 p.m. Wow. Yeah. That's more than I've ever known about wherever that place is in Pakistan. I don't know anything about Pakistan, I don't like. All right. Well, Grendor, what's going on in sports right now?

Oh, my God. There's so many things happening in sports that you don't even understand i maybe not i have been talking with a bunch of people here in london and i guess some soccer thing is happening i don't even know isn't the world cup soon i don't know what's going on i think it's like the classic or something's happening today, and everyone is losing their shit. And I'm just like, I don't – sure, okay. I don't understand it. Crazy Europeans.

Crazy Europeans. Yeah, I had a moment of like, well, yeah, you teach me about soccer, and I'll teach you about football. And then they looked at me, and they were like, we know a lot about American football. I was like, oh, okay. So it's, once again, on Americans that we just don't give a shit about soccer. So we never learned.

Meanwhile, the rest of the world's like, yeah, American football's fun. Yeah. World Cup actually starts in a month. So it's pretty close. America's not in it though. So never is. We were in it the other year. And we lost last year.

And we lost. This year we're literally not in it. Let's see. So, we got the NFL draft happened. It was pretty crazy. Cleveland Browns got their quarterback. Yo, the dude with one arm got drafted. I was pretty excited about that.

Dude with one arm went to Seattle. His brother already plays there, so that's kind of cool. He's playing with his brother. Packers got two corners. Loved it. Just what we needed. And then the J jets got a quarterback there's like five quarterbacks gone in the first round which is kind of insane that's like the most quarterbacks ever in the first round which shows how many teams are just like please

please let us get a quarterback then the packers also got a first rounder from the Saints mama mia we're set I loved our draft uh NBA uh Toronto Raptors were the number one seed supposed to be going all the way and then LeBron James has just been crushing him in classic NBA fashion which is the Eastern Conference LeBron wins and then in the other conference it's usually either like Golden State or Houston. And right now it's looking like it'll be Golden State or Houston against LeBron James. Boston's doing pretty well, though. They beat Philadelphia. And then over in hockey, hockey, NHL, the Golden Knights beat the Sharks to go up 3-2 in their series.

Damn. And then Tampa Bay is up on Boston 3-1. And the Jets are up on the Predators 3-2. And Washington's up on the Penguins 3-2 in that series because they beat the Penguins last night. Mamma mia. Anything else? Any other sport? Oh, baseball.

Baseball's got like 100 games left, so it's fine baseball Baseball's got like 100 games left So it's weird Baseball's still happening Yeah Although the guy In the Cardinals Got hit in the nuts

By the ball And that's I mean that's The beauty of baseball Yep It was It was a pretty bad one too It wasn't even like

Oh geez It was like It foul tipped off the bat into his nuts, and I don't think he had a cup on. That's why you need solid protection. That's true. And if you can't have solid protection, the next best thing is feeling as good as possible.

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MeUndies.com slash Crendor. MeUndies.com slash Crendor. That's M-E-Undies.com slash C-R-E-N-D-O-R. Crendor, that's me. Yep, that's you. All right. Well, Crendor, what is our big news story of the day all right so there were two stories that interested me uh both sent by the fans by the way if you see any stories

send them on twitter send them on twitter that's where we pretty much go for our news now we let the fans do it because we're too lazy to find the stories. All right, what is our stories? Let's see it. So one's an update on the Big Mac man. As of May 4th, Wisconsin man. Oh, no, don't tell me he's dead. Don't tell me he's dead. Nope, even better. He's down his 30,000th Big Mac. 30,000.

I'm going to salute this dude. Salute. This man is the Ozzy osbourne of fast food he keeps consuming and nothing happens to him it's like ozzy osbourne has like done every drug like taking him with alcohol and he's like fine like his liver is like i don't know i don't know if i call ozzy osbourne fine well he's as fine as he can be for what he's done. All right. The man should be dead. He should have died like 30 years ago. Sure.

Don Gorski gobbled down his 30,000 Big Mac on Friday at the same McDonald's where he got his first taste of beefed up burger in 1972. At the time, it was the only McDonald's in town. I just got my driver's license, he said. The popular fast food chain promoted the Big Mac enthusiast's monumental ingestion held at 3 p.m. under the Golden

Arches, attended by McDonald's Fox Valley's franchise owner, D.W. Rouse. Don has a passion for Big Macs like no other, Rouse said. These kudos, as well, came straight from national headquarters

We are loving Don Gorski's enthusiasm For our iconic Big Mac saying We should appreciate his ongoing loyalty I hate that I hate when they say We appreciate his love For our sandwich And we just can't wait for him to continue eating McDonald's

Just like you can At our new McDonald's location. I hate corporate spin. Lawyers and PR people writing stuff sounds so... You know, I wish this guy was a Wendy's person. So, if he

ate a Dave's Double every day for 30 years, and then Wendy's Twitter account tweeted out, like, that's right bitches this guy gets it like something fun yeah i'd be down with that yeah that's that's how social media is like spinning the new thing but then mcdonald's is still like congratulations to our favorite customer um the one biggie for me something i've been looking forward to, said Gorski, a 64-year-old retired prison guard. He made the news in October when representatives from the Guinness Book of World Records came to Fond du Lac to record a meeting, his 29,482nd Big Mac.

On Friday, the Big Mac maniac gave a half-hour presentation to the crowd, which gathered to watch him take the first bite of the 30,000 sandwich containing two all-beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions, and a sesame seed bun. He showed off his record books and how he keeps track of the thousands of receipts, sandwich wrappers, and containers. People like to see proof, he said. He's right. You know what?

I was about to say that's crazy, but the dude's right. No pics, no proof said he's right you know what i was about to say that's crazy but the dude's right no pigs no proof he's right uh while he managed through the years to preserve and categorize most everything he did lose about 7 000 or so or so styrofoam cartons that were damaged in a tornado that blew never mind crazy never mind it's Off his house. It's back to being crazy. No, you don't. Why would you save the cartons? That's gross. I don't know.

He said he's also been the blunt of jokes targeted for his eccentricities. But Gorski says he's taken it all in stride and stayed true to his diet, making fun of health nuts. People make fun of me, but it never bothered me, Gorski said. At my last medical checkup, I had low cholesterol and my blood pressure was fine. Tall and lanky with a graying ponytail and friendly demeanor, Gorski's obsessive compulsive disorder and a meticulous memory, which lends to his Big Mac habit and his penchant for details. Among his calculations, Gorski figured out it took him 356 days

to eat his first thousand Big Macs. On the day McDonald's founder Ray Kroc died in 84, Gorski ate his 55,978th Big Mac. Mamma mia. That's crazy, but alright. Yeah, yeah.

In 2003, Ellen DeGeneres requested Gorski's cholesterol be checked. It was 140. In 2006, he crossed the finish line of the San Diego Marathon carrying his 21,387th Big Mac. So, I mean, he's exercising. He's running marathons. So, I mean, that's obviously.

I mean, I guess that's the key to it. Most people who are ordering Big Macs probably aren't exercising as much as he is. Yeah. So, that's him, he's still going Good on you Gorski Yeah good on you Gorski, you're killing it dude And then we have this story Mystery Pooper At New Jersey High School's track

Turned out to be superintendent Cops say Whoa wait, hold up I'm sorry can you repeat that headline mystery pooper that's my favorite start to a headline mystery mystery pooper if i if i make a music album i I want it to be titled Mystery Pooper. Mystery Pooper. All right.

What was that? All right. What's the title again? Mystery Pooper at New Jersey High School's track turned out to be Superintendent. God. Okay. All right. The Kenilworth School superintendent

charged Monday with defecating in public was caught in the act at the Homo High School football field and tracked after surveillance was set up due to human feces being found on a daily basis. What? This guy went out and pooped

on the track daily? I guess so. Thomas Trammaglini, 42, lives about three miles from Holmul High School in neighboring Aberdeen. He was running at the track on the athletic fields at 5.50 a.m.

before he was arrested. Track coaches and staff at Holmul High School told the district's resource officer that they found human feces on or near the football field and track daily. Wait, wait, wait, wait wait wait wait how come they don't mention him being the superintendent in the actual article though uh i think no it's getting there tramagini has taken a paid leave of absence from his 147 504 a year job leave can only be unpaid if a person is indicted or faces tenure charges Tramagini replaced superintendent Scott Taylor who resigned in August 2015 he previously served as chief academic officer and also held positions in Plumstead and Freehold previously managed as a part-time lecturer at

Rutgers but does not currently work the university No one answered the door at Tramblgini's home I don't So Follow me here He goes running Every day in the morning And then for some reason After his run

Poops there Like a dog claiming it as his own Yeah Then He does it so much that the school has to set up cameras to catch this mysterious pooper. But as superintendent, he doesn't know that the school's doing this? I don't know. I guess not. Maybe he thought he was getting away with it.

But he's a super... What do you know if the school set up cameras at the track? Isn't that his job to know that? You would think so. I just don't understand. I just don't understand. This is like the higher up guy supposed to know everything. It's like, hey,

somebody's been doing this thing at the track where the cameras there. He'd be like, no, I'll take care of it. Right? Yeah. And I figure he would be like, yeah, one of those pooping on our track. That's gross. And then maybe he would even stop, which goes back to the original point,

which is he did this. It's like a serial killer. Once they kill a few times, they keep killing because it's the only high they get anymore. This guy in his life, his thing was pooping on a track. This is his drug. Yeah. He would go into the office and be like, no one here knows I pooped on the track. I'm blown away by this.

I don't know what, I don't understand what was going on. We need more, again, more information needed. How did this guy poop on this track? Why was he pooping? Back to the real reporting. Where are the real reporters? You know what? I get why people are crapping on the news media. Where's the real reporters that's you know what I get why people are are crapping on the news media

where's the real reporting why did anyone go interview this guy and figure out why he's pooping on this track well I guess they tried to but nobody was you're right you're absolutely right yeah all right well that's it for us thank you so much for

listening or watching or whatever you're doing right now please by all means go to iTunes or on YouTube and like this video or podcast and give us thumbs up and ratings and reviews and all that stuff we would love it if you did

and that is it for us we'll see you next time everybody and as always to be continued.