Cox n' Crendor Show - Episode 187 - Cox n' Crendor Put You To Sleep!

Episode Date: March 11, 2019

The boys are back with an all new episode, and this time they finally understand what podcasts are for - putting you to sleep! What they don't understand is what the hell is going on at malls across America. Jesse tries to be a handyman and Crendor finds an amazing story of love and shrimp. All on this exciting new episode of Cox n' Crendor! Get any premium Indochino suit for $359 at http://indochino.com with promo code: COX

Today's episode is brought to you by Indochino. We have got some clothes that are gonna make you look hot. We have got Indochino. Some hot. I think that's a better. I think that's better. We got some hot. Anyway, we'll talk about that later, but let's jump into this show. Hello everybody, it's time for Ghost on Treadmill. Let's see Treador in the morning! In the morning! Broadcasting live, live, live, live, live! In 4-hour recording studios!

Recording! Wake your ass up! It's Cox and Crendor in the morning! Cox and Crendor in the morning! Hello everybody, welcome back to another exciting episode of Cacks and Grendor in the morning. Hey everybody, I just hit my hand on a desk. You know what, I believe it. I believe you were so excited for this show, you whacked your hand. I did, I was like, and then I like threw my hand down and it hit the other desk to my side and then I was like

I do that quite often. I have hurt myself on more furniture than should really be allowed I think. Is it the furniture's fault for being there or is it your fault for forgetting that the furniture's there or is it? Oh it's always my fault.

I would never blame furniture furniture is pure totally totally blameless furniture i said that while rubbing my desk which is weird furniture is pure i love it so smooth except that chair over there hate that hate that chair. Stupid chair. I wish I was pure and smooth. No chair. What were we talking about? Oh, yeah, we didn't talk about anything yet. How are you doing?

Yeah, we literally just started. Hi. That's what happens when we do that. I'm just like, what were we talking about? And then I'm like, oh, yeah, we just started. Yeah. Your mind goes to that mode. Oh, my God. So I'm at home today because I was trying to set up my office at home. talking about and then i'm like oh yeah we just started yeah your mind goes to that mode oh my

god so i'm at home today because i was trying to set up my office at home and you can hear it still got like some echo going on so i went and i bought uh sound curtains like those big um like blanket looking things that you hang and they're supposed to like dampen the sound and i was like oh these work perfectly i don't have to like install anything. I can just like hook them into the wall. So I went and I bought these like hooks that I could hook. Hooked up a sound curtain to it. Sound curtain straight up was like, no, I'm heavy as hell, bitch.

And just fell right out the wall. I'm like, okay, let's try this again. So I went back out, bought screws. And I went to go screw into the wall, but I realized that because the screw is, like it doesn't have a big enough, like head at the end. Right.

That the thing would just slip off. And so I was like, all right, well, I'll put it at an angle. But then the angle didn't, like it didn't work, needless to say. So I went back out and the guy's like, well, you need screws with caps. So he sold me these screws with caps, and he's like, yeah, you just drill it into the wall,

and then what you do is you put the cap on it, and then the cap prevents any big thing from falling off. And I was like, oh, awesome. Thank you, sir. Got home. All the screws with caps came completely assembled. So you have to unscrew the top. Unscrew the top only to find out that there's no place for my drill bit to fit in these. So I was like, how do I screw them in?

So I had like a really freak out moment. And literally minutes before we started recording this, I was like, wait a minute. I saw through the matrix. I was like, wait a minute. I don't need to screw the nail. The nail can go in my drill and I can just screw it that way and then unhook my drill from it

and then put the cap on and it works. I have, it's like halfway hanging up on the wall right now and I'm looking at it. I'm very pleased. I feel very handy-mandy. I'm like,

4D chess. Yeah. I'm just like pounding my chest with pride. This is great. And so I have three more to hook up. But I... Yeah. When that's hooked up, there will hopefully, in theory, be less echo in here.

And then I can start doing more stuff from home and I'm very excited. This is very exciting for me. This is a big day. This is huge. This is a huge day. You used to do all more stuff from home. And I'm very excited. This is very exciting for me. This is a big day. This is huge. This is a huge day. You used to do all your stuff from home. Yeah. Then I will never have to talk to anyone again.

I can just live at home like a hermit. And when people come see me, I'll give them wise advice. Like, ooh, waste your time you have. You know, good advice. That's the thing. It's like you start out, you work from home, and you're like, maybe an office will be more productive than you are. And then you're like, well, I want to go back home. And then you just go back home.

Then you don't have to talk to anybody again. You just record in your pajamas. Yeah, I'm currently in my MeUndie boxers. Everyone's wondering. I spent the whole day in socks, MeUndie boxes, and a T-shirt. It's been great. I've done anything. Is that how you went to the hardware store in socks, MeUndieBoxers, and a t-shirt And it's been great Is that how you went to the hardware store? Oh, no, actually I went in sweatpants

But you're alright Sir, you realize you don't have pants on Of course I do They're called MeUndieBoxers They're keeping me snug Yeah, that's pretty much what I've been doing my whole day. Huh. You know, I've been handymanning.

I have a nice, like, ladder now. I got a ladder because I couldn't reach the top of my ceiling, so. I'm not 10 feet tall, so I couldn't reach up there. Dang. Is there anybody that's 10 feet tall? Wasn't there, like, one guy who's like that but he

died because he was too tall? Yeah I think eventually becomes I don't get how it works like is that it why do people who are tall or I guess on the flip side very very small die faster? Well I guess tall people put more pressure on like their bones and stuff or joints. So he collapsed? I don't know. There's the one guy in the NBA, Yao Ming. He's like 7'6". He always had really bad lower body issues and back issues. So I guess it's something like that. It wears you down faster.

I don't know. I'd imagine it's easier to be shorter than it is taller, I think. Unlike your body or something. Well, I definitely know that when you are shorter, your skin and things like that, you look longer. Longer? You look longer. You look younger.

You look younger longer. Yeah. I mean, it makes sense. That's why I look like I'm 14. I mean, it makes sense. That's why I look like I'm 14. Well, I used to. Now I have so much hair and a buff door. Now I've become my age.

When you look, this is what you find when you look up, why do tall people die faster? Just a heads up. Basically, it's saying here that tall people, what is happening today? Tall people are lumber because they chop wood in the old yard. Tall people. What is happening today? All peeper are lumber because they chop wood in the old yard. Tall peepers. Tall people generally have better cholesterol levels and lower blood pressure.

And it may explain why shorter people are more likely to die of heart disease, heart attack, and stroke. But it also says shorter people appear to have longer lifespans than average. I'm just trying to... Shorter people appear to have longer lifespans than average. None of this explains why. Is height related to longevity? Well, here's the question. They're saying the taller you are, the longer you'll live. But then why do super tall people who are like 10 feet tall, why do they die quicker? I don't know.

What? None of this makes sense. Someone out there is going to have a real answer. Somebody. Please. We don't need to look this up. You'll just tell us. Short men will live longer than taller people because they're more likely to carry a gene

that protects them from the effects of aging, scientists have revealed. Wait, so yours is saying mine says that tall people will live longer, but yours is saying short people will live longer. Yes. Well, it says short people will live longer, but yours is saying short people will live longer. Yes. Well, it says short men will live longer than taller people. It doesn't even specify anything. There's got to be something here. There's got to be.

Yeah, this one says that taller people tend to live longer than shorter people. Is there like a, there's got to be like a website that's like, you know, Mayo Clinic. Oh my God. You know what? I've officially gone too far down the internet. Why do humans live longer than dogs is the question here.

Let's see. Let's see. I like how that's like someone was like, why can't dogs live longer than us? Wait. Researchers may have found out why there's a trend for giants to die younger than shorter people. Neil Fingleton was the seven feet, seven inch tall Guinness World Record holder basketball player and only 36 years old when he died. Though the cause is not yet known, this young age is not uncommon among tall people. Andre the Giant, Matthew McGorry, Robert Wadlow.

By contrast, the inhabitants of the Japanese island of Okinawa, who have an average height of 5'5", have the longest life expectancy on Earth at 78 on average scientists believe that the same factors behind higher than average growth could also be what leads to premature death the brain's pituitary gland which produces hormones and kicks off processes of puberty can develop tumors that cause too much of our growth hormones to be produced resulting in term gigantic gigantism so they got like their... So base... It's working overtime.

Yeah, what makes them so tall is also what kills them. Interesting. Damn, that's like some weird superhero. Like, what made them strong was also their downfall. It's like that type of thing. Except real. I mean, if you want to know what I've also found is that, did you know that dogs can tell if you're untrustworthy? I don't know why I'm on dogs now.

I went from looking up how tall people are, now the internet is just giving me dog facts. Now, this may be crazy to you. Although heart disease is a risk, they found that taller people had a decreased risk. Even then, height is less important factor than things like regular exercise and healthy eating. Yeah, wow. So it really just boils down to healthy eating and regular exercise. Pretty much it. Yeah, so basically what it's saying is that in general, tall people will live longer than shorter people.

But if you become too tall, what kills you is the thing that made you too tall. Yeah. Okay. All right. It's still insane. Most importantly, it's just eating well

and exercising. Like, for example, I go to the doctor like every month at this point. It's like part of me. Oh my God. I'm just like, hey, while I get my blood pressure

checked, I've had, dude, I've had so much blood drawn. You don't even know. And then they're always like, it looks good. Why do they keep taking your blood? Are they making clones of you? I don't know, man. You probably should. You probably should know. I don't know.

I'll just get my random digestive stuff and I'm like, I'll go to the doctor and they're like all right let's try this and then like you know uh all my gall bladder things having surgery like you just when you have all that you get a lot of blood drawn you get a lot of tests you get a lot whatever uh and so at first like a few years ago my blood pressure was high and they're like do you have a family history of high blood pressure and i'm like yeah a little bit like i'll watch it and then after I started becoming buff door and going to the gym three times, four times a week, every time I've got my blood pressure, they're like, it's great. It's literally just from working out.

So it shows. That's fantastic. That all you got to do is just, you know, go out and exercise every day. It's not even every day. It's four times a week, three, four times a week. Right. It's easy. And then just, you know, don't eat a every day. It's not even every day. It's four times a week. Three, four times a week. Right. It's easy. And then just, you know, don't eat a lot of bad foods.

That's it. Oh, yeah. I also found this thing. It said being short actually reduces the risk of cancer because the cancer risk for men increases by 11% for every extra 10 centimeters of height because you have more cells that are vulnerable. Interesting. Finally. You're just playing the odds then. Finally, a benefit to being 5'7".

You're just playing the odds. Yeah. I mean, listen. It all boils down to just live your life. You know? What are you going to do? You just got to live it. Yeah, okay what you got what are you gonna do you just gotta you just gotta live it you know just yeah you have to much like the song live your life it's my life or the bon jovi um yeah sure sure depending on what your musical tastes are there's

always somebody that's got it worse than you there's always somebody got got better than you that's what boils down to right so you know yeah yeah um now i don't remember we were talking about oh yeah putting up wall mounts uh oh my god that's what i'm gonna bring up okay so i've been watching this youtube channel called retail archaeology and he goes around to like dead malls and like dead retail stores and like looks at all the like old stuff like payless and sears and like malls with like nothing in them and i've like gone down the rabbit hole just watching all these like dead so he goes to malls that are like basically dead malls. Yeah. And there's just like nothing there. There's like two stores, like one person walking around. Yeah. That sounds like the Dayton Mall.

It might have changed, but the Dayton Mall used to be that way. And there was no one ever around. And once they got rid of Babbage's, all they have is like a Petridge Farm store. And I think like a weird Sears at the end. And there was never any. I wonder what it's like now it's been literally a decade since I've been there yeah but I'm curious

it's uh it's interesting see like goes to all these stores and it's like they still got shit from like the 80s and the 90s like the wall the walls the racks the like the price tags like everything just looks dated and then some of it they like try to update

like jc penny you'll be like oh check our modern thing and their ceilings still like from the 70s and you're just like yeah and then they wonder why they're dying but it made me think about like how would you want to make a retail store or a mall in like a modern uh thing like would you want to attach the internet to it in some way? Like, I know Kohl's. Kohl's has it now, or you can take your Amazon returns to them and they just ship them out. I would make my mall like some of the malls here in LA, where like in the middle of the mall, they have this one mall. It's a Westfield something.

They have a giant billboard that just literally is like Instagram feeds. It's ridiculous. They have a food court that's all like really good food. Yeah. And like places you would just want to go to eat just to eat. And they have like it's the place that you and I went to. The outdoor mall. Yeah, I remember that.

That place is great. Everything there is everything there is like yeah this is nice yeah we've got a few of those here in chicago too the thing i noticed is that those malls are all like they're either a westfield mall or a simon mall and i sure i was looking into it apparently those two companies like buy up like good area malls and they just like super renovate them and modernize them and they fill out all the spaces so it never looks dead. And then all the old all the malls that aren't like owned by them pretty much die off because they're just like smaller and like bad areas or like small areas with, you know, like one Sears. Nobody wants to go to Sears and shit like that. You know what? Sometimes I'll go to a Sears.

I'll go to a Sears. I'll go to a Sears just to see what they have. They never have anything I want. But like, you know, they might have something good on sale, maybe. Like what? But they never do. I don't know. They never do, but I just keep, you know, I'll see like Sears, 50% off sale. I'm like, alright, let's see what they, maybe I can get something

I need. Nothing. I've always wanted to get like a grill. Oh yeah. Grills. And I'm like, well Sears, they used to have grills there, I guess, back in the day. And I go there and they never have anything I'm looking for. Yeah. I don't know. Yeah, it feels like they just don't really specialize in anything. They're just kind of mediocre at everything.

They're not even mediocre. They're like below average at everything they do. Yeah, I guess the place that's near us now is Blodale's but bloomingdale's so expensive yeah like there was a hoodie and it was like 300 bucks i'm like who's gonna pay 300 for a hoodie mama mia yeah i ain't paying that i ain't paying that uh but then it was like i started realizing how much nostalgia i had from like being a kid and going to malls because like my parents and grandparents and all of them they always go to the mall and I'd go with and they'd be like you're a kid and you're like oh Disney store or you're like oh food court and you're just like got all the nostalgia from that so I was looking at my old malls and they're all just like dead except for like a few

of them I used to live behind a mall when I taught in uh Columbus and uh it was the Dublin Mall. Whoever lives out there in Dublin, Ohio, home of Wendy's, you let me know if that mall's still popping off. Because that was a fun mall. I used to go there every weekend and just walk around until I realized that, you know,

at that point I would have been mid to late 20s. Yeah. And even then you feel weird been mid to late 20s. Yeah. And even then, you feel weird on the weekends at the mall. Yeah. If you're by yourself and you see kids that are 14, you're like, ooh, what am I doing here? But I would walk around and look at stuff and be like,

one day I'll be able to afford this. And like, oh, that outfit looks very nice. I'd rather have it. I window shopped. I had no money. I was a teacher. But it was like a dream. I was like, one day i'll get this and maybe i could wear this that's when i go to the food court and eat uh japanese food and then i go home

yeah it's one of those things like whenever you go to the mall or like starbucks and there's always like a bunch of like high school kids there you realize how much older you are now and then they're just like we're gonna go to like what's it we're at uh eating somewhere these kids i think it was starbucks and they're just like we're going to dance fest call ricky up is he going to dance fest hey do you have tickets to dance fest she's like i don't got tickets to dance fest she's like get tickets for dance fest i'm like what the shit is dance fest why does everyone want to go to dance fest why does ricky not want to go to dance great if ricky goes i'm going well yeah no doubt ricky's cool great guy yeah ricky's cool as

shit yeah if he goes we're in and it was just there's no reason to go if ricky's not there though you start realizing like how how like adult normie your life becomes you know but here's the thing back in high school i didn't go to dance fest either i just sat inside and played wow so i don't know i haven't changed i'm sure what's changed about you really it's like yeah not much uh oh no oh uh that's right i looked it up and it's got a more store closures at pud. Will it suffer the same fate as other central Ohio malls? So that doesn't sound too good. Oh, Tuttle Crossing, the mall?

Yeah. Yeah, it sounds not good. Starbucks. I forgot it was called Tuttle Crossing was the name of the mall. There's an old Simpsons clip. I don't know if you remember that, where he goes to the mall to like, I don't know what he does. I think he gets his ear pierced there. And then he's like, can I get this?

Or a tattoo or something. He's like, you better hurry up. In 10 minutes, this place is becoming a Starbucks. And he walks out and every place is a Starbucks. That's a good one. Good Simpsons. Good Simpsons. So wait, Total Crossing malls go, wow.

Yeah. What? This is what I'm saying. I did the same. I looked up all the malls I used to go to. And they're just like, yep, a bunch of stores are are closed they remodel all this shit tore it all up nobody goes there it's just like what the shit it's crazy yeah wow i did find that january 3rd article more closures at tuttle same fate as other central ohio malls yeah malls suck in ohio now

i think a lot of things suck in ohio if i had to take a wild guess uh you would be correct also when i first looked it up it said closed and i thought the whole mall was closed but i realized on the east coast it's much later than it is here on the west oh yeah so i was like oh my god did they just close the whole mall, it is just closed for the day. Yeah, it looks like it's still open. I am thoroughly shocked. Damn. I used to go there all the time. But I guess, maybe even back then it was pretty shitty.

I never knew, though. Yeah. Because my standards for that was like, Ohio malls. Like, I only knew Ohio malls. Yeah, that's true. I want to go to Mall of America. What's that like? I've been to the Mall of America.

Is it okay? I went when I was like seven. So I don't like really remember it, but I remember it being big. And I remember going to like, they had like a Lego like roller coaster in there, like a legit roller coaster. And Snoopy was also there and I took a picture with him. That sounds great. Also, can you find that picture of you and Snoopy was also there and I took a picture with him. That sounds great! Also, can you find that picture of you and Snoopy? I wanna see you, I wanna see both a young you and what I assume is a really jank looking Snoopy.

I think it's actually pretty good Snoopy because it's the Mall of America so they don't mess around. Um... Okay. We'll see. But I can try and find it. Let's see here... I don't know. So yeah, I've been watching all these mall videos. It's almost kind of like ASMR. It's like the visual type of ASMR where he just plays some wave music where it's like,

and he's like, now we're walking through this mall. And as you can see, this Payless is closing. You can see, and he just keeps walking around. I'm like, whoa, man. Before you know it, you spent

like two hours watching him walk around a mall. Speaking of malls, there's the Del Amo in Torrance, which is this, it's huge. It is a massive, massive mall. It technically is three malls all connected by sky bridges. But

it's weird because one mall is sort of outdoors, right? And it's an outdoor mall and it has all the things you would expect in an outdoor mall right it has the movie theater has all that stuff then you go to the inside part for the second mall and there's a ton of stuff in there it has like a crazy cool food court all this different stuff but if you keep going you end up in the third mall right and the third mall everything in that mall it half of it seems closed half of it is like the army recruitment center there's a bunch of weird stuff in there that i've never heard of before and then like nail salons and like you know things that you're just i don't

it's it definitely seems like it's falling apart right it even it even looks and feels different the lighting is different. The ceilings, it looks like the tiles are crumbling a little bit. Everything about it seems different. And it literally isn't the same mall as two other malls that are brand new. It's very weird. And I don't know why it's there. I don't know.

And every time I go to that part of the mall, there's no one in there. It's like people are like, oh, I'm not going in there that's the uh damned section yeah i don't know that is weird why would they even put that in like it seems like it just doesn't fit it doesn't because then you go uh through this doorway and you end up in you know just an upscale mall yeah and then if you try if you go further out you end up in this outdoor mall that has all these like fresh hip cool places and then yeah it's bizarre i don't know why it exists but it does and i every time i'm there i walk far enough to get to there and i'm like oh time to turn around it literally has every it has every i know this from memory on the second floor of this this weird mall every store is a recruitment center for a type of military

a pay less shoes that is constantly going out of business a nail salon and a place that sells watches and ties and then down below is a closed down coffee shop and then a bunch of like a shoe polisher and a bunch of just things that you would need if you like like a like a like a locksmith things like that are down yeah on the first and that's it that's all it's in this mall it and in fact one of the military branch uh recruitment centers is closed it just isn't open there's nothing in it but it says like united states navy wait what hello i'd like to join the navy damn it's weird it's very bizarre they put i i wonder if it's cheaper to be in that part of the mall, which is why all these things are there.

Or if all these things are there and they were like, oh, we don't want to be part of that section of the mall. So they moved to another section of the mall or they were like, well, you can put your stuff here, but you have to go to like, they forced them to go. I don't know. I don't know what happened, but it's very weird. It's got to be one of those things where it's like there's various points of the mall that are more popular so it's like you could have this good space or we could just shove you in the back over there for cheap and they'll be like we'll take the cheap spot then they realize nobody goes back there yeah it literally seems like you are in a video store and this is the adult section

like it's a little weird when you go back there and there's not many people. And it's kind of like everyone has an unspoken code that you just don't talk to anyone. And then there's the creepy old guy that's like, what are you looking for? Exactly. Like, I've seen it all. Maybe I can help. And you're like, no, please. I'm going to go back.

And you, like, turn around immediately. That's what it feels like. Yeah. Damn. I like malls yeah I mean we did just spend like 10 minutes talking about that maybe more maybe more yeah I don't know I think part of it is like nostalgia cuz you grow up going a lot of malls when you're a kid especially back in like the 90s it's just very bizarre so that's uh that's kind of what i've been doing watching mall videos uh i was gonna watch jupiter ascends but i forgot so i'll probably watch it so mad at you you should have watched it should have watched it tonight

that's what i'm gonna do the audience some people in the audience have watched it and messaged me and been like craziest thing i've ever seen it is genuinely the craziest i'm ready uh i said that last week but i'm gonna watch it this week 100 all right and the internet's counting on you for a solid review you can count on me sometimes all right we'll see you spend all your time at the mall yeah um we sprung ahead time wise yeah i don't like that can we talk about how much I don't like that I wish we just stayed at like sprung ahead you know what I mean

like we didn't I don't care what we do I just feel like the rest of the world's like what are you guys doing stop this and I agree I agree it's stupid I like this one more because we get more daylight so I like I'd rather just stay at this one and not fall back and get used to it. There's no reason.

I guess you're right. There's no reason to even do... Are you saying you just want to have the sun out at midnight? You should move to Alaska. No, but then in the winter, instead of when it gets dark at like the earliest, it's like 4.30, it'll get dark the earliest at 5.30. So it's a little bit nicer. I mean, I guess you're right. It'll keep the kids off the streets. Exactly. earliest is like 4 30 it'll get dark the earliest at 5 30 so it's a little bit nicer i mean i guess

you're right it'll keep the kids off the streets exactly no that's what it's gonna do it's gonna stop drugs this is a platform i can support if we just change daylight savings time kids will stop doing drugs it's foolproof let's there's gotta be like somebody being like daylight savings daylight savings well yeah there's gonna be a lot of people who are like get rid of it It's foolproof. There's got to be somebody being like, Daylight Savings. Daylight Savings. Well, yeah, there's going to be a lot of people who are like, Get rid of it. Daylight Savings is here. Suppose we made this time change our last?

Let's see. 1966 law allows states to opt out of Daylight Savings, and Hawaii and Arizona do so, staying on standard time all year. Wait, so if you're listening from Arizona you don't even do anything or yeah I saw a bunch of tweets where people were like enjoy your lost hour idiots damn I was like damn it Arizona but then if wait what happens if we go to Arizona then what time is it you know 603 in time. It's 603 here as well. So they stay at this time, and then when you fall back in the fall, they just don't.

They stay at 603? Oh, interesting. Yeah. Huh. So they're just kind of like, welcome back today. Like, they didn't do anything. Damn. Yeah.

I want that. Basically, it's one less thing to have to worry about. I'm okay for that. Yeah. Then it messes up my sleep schedule even more. So I'm like, man, now instead of going to bed at 5 a.m., I'm going to bed at 6 a.m. This is awful. That is still terrible.

Everything you're saying is still awful. But then I'll slowly work it back to 5 a.m. What are you doing up so late? It's hard to fall asleep when you get up late. So I get up at like 1, 2pm Well why? I don't know And then it's just hard to change it

That's why it usually changes when you travel But then even then it's like A lot of people that are streamers YouTubers I see have that issue Where they're just like sleep schedule's messed up again But now that I'm getting older That's because y'all literally stream for like 20 hours Well that's the thing i can't just like stop streaming at night i gotta stream at night why that's what i do that's you know what i'm not gonna i worked

overnight shifts stocking groceries so i get it i just like i guess now that I'm in old farts I'm like y'all are dumb y'all are dumb kids the older I get the earlier I want to start waking up like I'm like eh but I think even if I woke up at like I don't know cause I gotta stream till like 3am 2am and then you like

gotta wind down and before you know it it's 5am and I'm like shit dude but then i think back to it and i used to go to bed like 3 a.m when i had school so i'd only sleep like five hours or whatever so that wasn't good no no wonder you're falling apart none of this sounds healthy yeah your whole body's like i don't even know what's happening man so i don't know i mean i'd be happy waking up before noon i know somebody's gonna be like listen all right when you wake up at like 2 3 p.m you gotta rewind it back a little bit that's early it's all perspective uh i heard the easiest way to do it is you just

go to bed like 15 minutes earlier every night that's like like a non-harsh way to do it. You know what I mean? Instead of just being like, I'll stay up 24 hours. I guess. I don't know the rules. I don't know. That's what I'll do. Because every time I see people be like, oh, reset day.

They stay up like 24 hours to try and fix their sleep schedule. Then they sleep like 10 hours. And then they're just tired. And then it slowly gets bad again. So it's like, why even do it? Yeah. I've tried a reset day. It doesn't't work it works for like a few days and then you're back in the back where you started so it's just easier and healthier just slowly work it back you got it

you got it all figured out got it all figured out kind of not at all not at all not at all not at all nope no don't listen to krendor it's only gonna get worse don't listen to me i don't listen to Crendor. It's only going to get worse. Don't listen to me. I don't know what I'm doing. I guess we should get to something you do know about then. Yes. What a good save. Okay. Great save. Do you need a suit?

Everybody needs a suit, right? Every guy looks better and feels more confident when they put on a suit. It's true. better and feels more confident when they put on a suit. It's true. You know, if you go to one where they measure you and get it custom fit, it's better than those ones off the rack at like Sears. You know, you don't want to get those. They don't even, those have been on the rack since like 1980. So why not just go get an Indochino suit?

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promo code cox for any premium suit for just 359 and free shipping it's an incredible deal for a premium made to measure suit and listen once you go custom you don't go back all right crendor let's go jump to the other side of the ground. Let's see. Well, if we look down below, hey, traffic's not too bad, actually. It's been pretty good, actually, as of late, but as the summer

starts picking up, days get warmer, people start going back outside. It's gonna get crazy. There's gonna be cars all over. There's still snow happening in all sorts of places, so people are still inside, but just wait, it's going to get warm. The cars are going to come out. Those fumes are going to be pumping into the air and man, you're going to be breathing in those chemicals and that sure is going to be great. Um, sometimes you like the smell of chemicals, you know? Uh, I don't, but some people do probably And yeah You know just

Keep your eyes on the road And your eyes peeled For Shit what's that even mean Eyes peeled Like you gotta peel your eyes Like you open your eyelids That's still kind of weird

It's like you're peeling an orange But you're like peeling your eyelids from your eye I don't like that Back to you Thanks Crandor now let's go over to Crandor at the weather desk That's still kind of weird. It's like you're peeling an orange, but you're like peeling your eyelids from your eye. I don't like that. Back to you. Thanks, Crandor. Now let's go over to Crandor at the weather desk. Weather desk.

Hey, Woppy. Woppy activated. Hold on. What was that? Hey, Woppy. What was that? What was that? Hey, Woppy. Seven, five, eight, three, three.

Centerville, Texas, 72 degrees Fahrenheit, mostly cloudy, feels like 72 degrees Fahrenheit, high, low, 60 degrees Fahrenheit, UV index 0 of 10, 10 high, light, rain, late late. Low 60 degrees Fahrenheit. Chance of rain 60%. Monday 62 degrees Fahrenheit. Scattered thunderstorms. 80% chance rain. Monday night 54 degrees Fahrenheit. 40% chance rain. Scattered storms developing after midnight. Tuesday AM AM showers.

High. 71 degrees. Fahrenheit. Chance of rain 50%. What? We need to get that thing fixed. We need to get that thing fixed. He's never going to get fixed. I don't know how to fix him. You fix one thing and the other thing breaks.

There's got to be someone out there you can fix wabi i'm the specialist then we're screwed that's what i'm saying you fix one thing another thing breaks you're right how foolish of me maybe maybe just don't hit it as often well can't do that okay i'll turn them off you're the specialist i have to There's no off switch. I don't know how to fix that. All right. So that's weather. Sports. Sports.

Hey, welcome to the sports desk. We've got some sports news for you. A big news story of the weekend is Antonio Brown, former Pittsburgh Steeler, has been traded to the Oakland Raiders. What do you think about that? So I think Antonio Brown is a giant diva. Yes, agreed. He was once the cool guy who on the punt return kicked the guy down.

It was great. And now he's just like, I don't want to play for you guys. I want more money, and I'm the best receiver. And every other team was like, I don't think I want that on my team either. And then leave it up to the Oakland Raiders to be like, nah, we'll take them. Anybody's going to take them on, it's going to be the Oakland Raiders. Also, Cincinnati Bengals, I thought, would have been open to that. But Oakland definitely open to it. They're looking for

whatever they can get. They're moving to Vegas in like a year. He probably wants he's ready to go to Vegas. Probably gamble some of that extra 12 million a year he's going to make and shit dude. That's some crazy stuff. And then free agency is going

to be starting up I believe in like two days where people can actually sign free agents in the NFL. So a whole bunch of things can be happening with that. There's people getting cut, released, moving on, contracts shifting around. You got the NFL draft in a month. Packers and Bears interested in Mark Ingram of the Saints. That's a good running back. I'd take him on the Packers. Giants are trying to trade Odell Beckham Jr.,

but apparently now they might not trade him this offseason. Nobody knows. It's a whole bunch of stuff. Chiefs released Justin Houston. Jets are making trades. Got the Eagles doing stuff. Whole bunch of things going on. Also, LeBron James and the Lakers in basketball

are not going to make the playoffs, which is kind of funny because everyone was like, dude, Lakers all the way. And it turns out the Western Conference is a little bit harder than the Eastern Conference. And they're not even going to make the playoffs. So not good for them. But hey, Milwaukee Bucks rolling out. Go Bucks. I'm rooting for the Bucks. normally I root for the Bulls,

but Milwaukee's, like, pretty close, you know? So they also got Giannis Atatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatat started winning again for a while now they're not uh sad times there but can you believe the number one team in the national hockey league is the tampa bay lightning uh florida very good at hockey the thing is like tampa bay has been the number one team for like years and nobody in florida cares there's like a few people they're like go lightning and everyone else is like yeah whatever and it's it's amazing because they're just they're always at the top i just don't know how they do it uh and then boston toronto on the other side we got san jose calgary winnipeg nashville uh, I don't know. I always like hockey playoffs and basketball playoffs because it's like

they're always seven game series. So the teams always hate each other when they go into the playoffs after like three games and they're just like and then they start fighting. So it's great. And that's sports. Alright, what is our big news story of the day? Big news story of the day.

This is a good one. Somebody sent this to us. Oh, boy. Okay. Couple has eaten at the same Wichita restaurant six nights a week for 15 years. I have a real question. Okay. How is this news? This is huge news.

This is not huge news. This is huge news. This is not huge news. This is huge. Hold on. What is this in? What is the newspaper this is in? The Kansas.com. Okay, sure. The Wichita Eagle, but it's on Kansas.com.

I would have respected Kansas.com, just the website more. Because at least that would have been like, oh, they're promoting this couple from Kansas. No, this is just the news in Kansas. This couple's very boring, is what I've learned. Some of their other stories are like, what's this? Mitchell O'Donnell says he spent his retirement savings on lawyer fees broken wrist teammate lost dream realized dexter dennis path to wichita state wichita doctor sold pain med prescriptions for cash sentenced to life in prison wichita accumulation

of parolees registered offenders has police has police concern. You know, all the serious, boring stuff. Yeah, yeah. But. Of course. Now, to the real news. Couple eats at Wichita restaurant six nights a week for 15 years. That is. I would go crazy.

Okay. Ron Watson is a creature of heaven. Unless this restaurant is amazing. Maybe it is. I don't't know here's their picture i love these two oh my goodness ron watson is a creature of habit he admits he's also someone who doesn't want to cook and doesn't want his wife of 20 years diana to have to cook long after a long day at work either. So nearly every day for the past 15 years, the couple has slid into table 412 at Westside Texas Roadhouse for their only meal of the day. She orders the roadkill, a chopped steak

with sauteed onions and mushrooms, plus a house salad with ranch dressing, no tomatoes and a baked potato, no salt. He orders barbecued chicken breast, or if he's feeling a little crazy, the pork chop. Well done. Plus mashed potatoes with brown gravy and an iceberg lettuce salad with Italian dressing. Though recently, he's discovered sweet potatoes. Turns out, he likes them. The Watsons have been keeping their routine since 2004 the only day of the week they don't go is on saturdays and that's only because diana the former owner of the now closed a legacy antique

mall works late on saturdays at architectural salvage and it's too crowded in the restaurant once she gets off on saturdays they they go to Hogwild on West Street, get some food to go, and watch Black Sheep Squadron while they eat. The Watsons know all the Texas Roadhouse servers, and the servers know that Diana wants a tall 502 Amber Ale and that Ron wants a water with lemon. They also know the kitchen staff,

and they're well acquainted with manager Kyle Halber, who had their pictures added to a wall of fame in the entry that features the restaurant's other most regular customers. But none are as regular as Ron and Diana. They're kind of like our unofficial mascots, he said. Everybody talks to them. The ritual is part of the order Ron Watson likes in his life. A Vietnam vet, he dines only in restaurants that offer military discounts and texas roadhouse gives vets 10 off he still has some ptsd he said

and he feels comfortable at table 412 which is a booth at the bar that gives him a good view of the door and everyone coming and going i get that oh my god okay yeah i know that i get it the couple are also a regular enough customer that they know how to make the most of their money at the Roadhouse. Every Sunday through Wednesday, they arrive between 3 and 3.15 p.m. to take advantage of the restaurant's early bird special, which is available from 3 to 5 Mondays through Thursdays and offers a full meal for $9.49. This is just an ad for the Texas Roadhouse. Did the Texas Roadhouse pay for this? Because I'm learning more about the Texas Roadhouse than I ever wanted to know.

Ever. At Christmas, the Watsons noticed a promotion being offered that would afford anyone who bought a $200 gift card a free appetizer serving of shrimp on every visit for a year. They bought that gift card, and now their meals start with an order of five shrimp on a skewer, which Ron always cuts into ten equal pieces to share with his wife. The kitchen mixes to couple up some special cocktail sauce just how they like it. Ron has done the math. We're going to eat 1,560 shrimp this year, he said.

this year he said this is the craziest thing i have ever heard oh my god he figures to spend about 22 a day at the restaurant and it's because it's the only meal they eat each day it all evens out he's decided it's just about as cheap as going to the grocery store buying your groceries coming home heating up the kitchen doing dishes and it's your if your time's worth anything to you it's about the same as eating at home but you get a lot better service people who eat at texas roadhouse every day however do have to make some sacrifices to make it work and the watson have made a major sacrifice they don't eat the restaurant's famous yeast rolls that come free before the meal they love why but at one point the rolls were becoming a problem for ron's waistline the servers know not to even tempt

him with the offer of bread occasionally ron and diana will bring a friend or relative to eat with them but for the most part dinner time at texas roadhouse is their time it's like having a date night six nights of the week she'll talk about what she did at work while we're there it's just our quiet time together i i'm like mesmerized i'm so i my favorite is this guy from Wichita, Kansas Jake rated it I was going to give it four stars Due to my girlfriend and I having to wait

But then the waitress showed up in about 30 seconds and she connected With us and it was really relatable So I saved that star What? What? I had to wait a whole 30 seconds. I was going to take a star off, but the waitress saved it.

Wait, apparently Texas Roadhouse is also a chain? Yes, it is a chain restaurant. I literally looked it up because I remember it from Ohio. Damn, I didn't know that. Yeah, I think it's the one where they give you peanuts and then you can throw them on the floor is that that one? that's five guys isn't it I think that's also Texas Roadhouse I don't know

I think that's it Texas Roadhouse and you throw yeah you throw them on the floor maybe I don't remember Texas Roadhouse fresh baked bread made from scratch sides dockside favorites call ahead you got the free appetizer i don't see any peanuts let's see texas roadhouse yelp uh there we go let's see it's gotta be like

some good reviews here he's good good reviews texas roadhouse all right uh texas roadhouse Texas Roadhouse. Alright. Texas Roadhouse. Let's see. Despite my bias against chain restaurants, Texas Roadhouse impressed me enough that I simply had to give it five stars. Damn. I made the mistake to walk next door to the hotel because I didn't want to get back in my car. I forgot how much I do not like this

place. If I wanted some honky-tonk, I'd be... If I wanted some honky tonk I'd be I wanted some honky tonk with dinner with loud blaring country music. That's fun but not after a long day. The best going is the rolls and butter. I ordered a steak

salad and the steak was overcooked. When I asked and when asked if I wanted Italian dressing I said no give me blue cheese but it came drowning in Italian dressing, I said, no, give me blue cheese. But it came drowning in Italian dressing and a small side dish of blue cheese. The waiter seemed shocked when I said I don't want Italian. Maybe you don't understand. No, I Italian.

No, I Italian. No, I Italian. Do you hear me? Italian. No, I'm Italian. Do you hear me? That's like, that's the type of person you like see at the restaurant too. They would actually say that like out loud.

Like, you know, they would and everyone would look over like, what's wrong with them? No, I'm Italian. This guy, typical Texas Roadhouse restaurant. The service is pretty good. The rolls are pretty tasty, if not too buttery i had an eight ounce dallas filet although the steak was cooked perfect and very tender it didn't really have that good of a taste two out of five i can't figure out why i read a review like that we're back at it again why write write these reviews? Yeah. That's what happens when you give everybody the ability to write reviews. You just get reviews like that.

There's like some detailed ones, and then there's always the like, I didn't like it. It was okay. 10 out of 10. I just, again, again, this person's listed as an elite 2019 member of Yelp. Their review. I finally had a chance to have the porterhouse steak, and it was big and good.

The service was also good. I like my hurricane margaritas as well. Three of five stars. It was big and good. That's an elite review. How was your meal? My steak was big and good.

It sounds like a five-year-old did it. How was your steak, Timmy? It was big and good. I give it three stars. All right, well, here's my honky-tonk story. Florida woman claims demon told her to steal rental car. Okay, yes. A Florida woman claims demon told her to steal a rental car. Okay. Yes.

A woman was arrested after stealing an SUV from an Ace Rent-A-Car. WJXT reports that Gardena McCullough, 23, appeared in court Friday morning on car theft charges with a bond at $15,003. Why is there an extra $3 on it? I don't know. McCullough was arrested after stealing a Toyota RAV4 from an ace rent-a-car. She was found less than a mile away, hiding at a hotel. On the scene, McCullough told a local news station, Demons told me to do it.

I didn't take it. Demons took it. She continued, I tried to rent it, but y'all didn't want me to rent a car. Y'all talking about how y'all didn't have any cars to rent, so I stole y'all shit. That sounds... So first she says the demons said to do it, but then she's like, y'all talking about how y'all didn't have any cars to run,

so I stole y'all shit. She didn't say the demons stole it. Can I just tell you, I feel her though. Sometimes demons possess me to yell at restaurants when they're like, sorry, there's no tables available right now. It's a 30 minute wait and you can clearly see tables. Yeah. The demon inside me is like, but there are tables right now.

Yeah, oh, I get it. That's true. Police found Nicola hiding in a hotel room When they eventually got into her room They handcuffed her and put her in a patrol car Friday morning when she appeared in court Nicola was wearing a red jumpsuit Indicating she requires extra attention at the jail Nicola has prior arrests in her record Including charges of trespassing

Resisting police, theft of a firearm Battery of a law, battery of a law enforcement officer, and more. She's due back in court March 28th. Wait, time out. None of that article had anything to do with demons. Correct. So why

was the title, Demons Told Her To Do It? Because that's what she said. On the scene, McCullough told a local news station, Demons Told Me To Do It. i didn't take it demons took it i don't like this i don't like that they're i don't like that they're they're they click baited us this is i wanted her to be like his name is azrael and he talks to me frequently about everything from the socio-political climate of the world today to never never mind, I see the photo. That is a woman that has seen some demons.

The look on her face is kind of like, hey. Yeah, she has that face of like, how you doing? You know what, Earth? The way she smiles and the look of her eyes, definitely she has said we all float down here at one point in her life. She's always like. She's definitely said that. You can always see it in, like, some people. Or, like, you see their eyes and there's just, like.

Oh, the crazy eyes? Yeah, her eyes are. This is, she's very close to Momo. Oh, yeah, a little bit. A little Momo-y. That's why it's so unsettling. I don't like it. Yeah, it's pretty creepy.

Anytime they do that. I'm not a fan. That smile and like, she's, that's her mugshot. She's got like creepy eyes and a smile. I'm not okay with it. It's like they're in a different existence. They're in a different plane. That's because a demon literally told her to steal your car. They descended to a different plane. They didn't ascend.

They dropped down one. Yeah, yeah i mean here's the deal either a demon told her or her first reaction was to say a demon told her both are crazy yeah no matter what she's crazy and no matter what you know what she should eat more at texas roadhouse might have got rid of those demons i want to point out the photo of that couple at Texas Roadhouse is so cute because his steak is all cut up into little cubes. And I truly hope that his wife did that for him because that would be really cute. That's the true love. Let me cut up your steak there. She just cuts it up for him. Then he cuts up the shrimp.

Yeah. Dang. And that's how you know they're in love. That's my favorite part of the entire story, is they get five shrimp, and rather than them, like one person eating three and the other person eating two, he cuts it into ten pieces so they can each have equal amount. That's very, very sweet. It is.

I like it. That's all I got. Okay. All right. Well, that's it for us. Thank you so much for listening or watching or however you are enjoying this podcast. Be sure to leave us an amazing five-star review where you tell us in three words or less how awesome we are. Go.

That's your assignment. Three words or less. Three words or less. Tell us how awesome. Yeah. Be like, it sound good. It sound good. It sound good. good. It sound good. It sound good.

Yeah, it sound good. Make me laugh. That's three. Very dumb hosts. Yeah, but five stars. Yeah, but five stars. Fell asleep. That's two.

Fell asleep fast. Yeah, that's a good review, actually, for podcasts. It is. That's a great review. It is. Yeah, five stars. Let everyone know that we knock you out. Please, everyone should go tweet out,

Cox and Crandor knock me out. When I'm laying in bed at night, Cox and Crandor put me to sleep quick. Shh. Be very vague. Just go to sleep. Oh, wait. Yeah, hold on.

It's the end of the podcast. We were probably trying to fall asleep. We can do this. Shh. Go to sleep. Go to sleep. Shh. Go to sleep.

Go to sleep. Go to sleep. Go to sleep right now. Hey. Hey. Go to sleep. Just go to sleep. Shh. Shh. Shh. Shh. Shh. Go to sleep right now hey go to sleep just go to sleep shh go to sleep

follow all our stuff youtube.com slash cox and crendor youtube.com slash cox and crendor podcast sound at spotify cox and crendor soundcloud cox and crendor just go to all the places we have cox and crendor our own things crendor.com youtube.com slash crendor jessie cox share your friends You just go at all the places we have Cox and Crandor our own things Crandor calm YouTube that cops

I described or Jesse Cox you to deck office. Jesse guys share your friends share their family share with your pet sure Texas Roadhouse servers share with everybody you know Go to sleep It's only creepy because we're whispering Never forget. Go to sleep. This is really creepy. It's only creepy because we're whispering. Isn't that weird? If we were saying this normally, they'd just be like, look at these idiots. But now that we're saying it in a whisper, it's like we're psycho.

If we were saying go to sleep out loud, people would be like, what the hell is going on? But now I'm afraid to play the end music because if I play the end music in a way,'s right what if they're asleep we have to slowly work it back up to normal volume yeah we gotta work it back up just keep working it back up imagine if we were like a party or something like hey man okay you just keep working it i got a great fort podcast for you it'll knock you out it'll put you right to sleep out yeah it's gonna knock you out gonna knock you out it's gonna knock you out gonna knock you out. It's going to knock you out. It's going to knock you out. It's going to knock you out. See, there we are. But we're back.

We're back. Hey, everybody. Thanks for listening. Hi. All right. Well, that's it for us. So we'll be back next week with another episode. And as always.

Ding. See you guys next time. Bye. Ah, shit. The music.