Cox n' Crendor Show - Episode 211 - Radioactive Whiskey Snake

Episode Date: September 23, 2019

We had a slight hiccup with this episode, apparently it went up and then was removed for some reason!? I didn't have a clue - so it's back! Anyway, this week the boys talk reality TV nonsense and learn about a snake super hero in the making. All this and more on a semi-new Cox n' Crendor! Right now, Cox n’ Crendor listeners get 25% off a Calm Premium subscription at http://calm.com/COX Head to http://wearFIGS.com and enter our code COX at checkout.

Today's episode is brought to you by Fig. If you are a nurse or doctor or dentist or medical professional, you're gonna wanna hear about the next great thing you're gonna wear. Also, today we're brought to you by Calm. If you need to relax or you have trouble sleeping, Calm is the app for you. We'll talk about that too.

Now let's jump into this podcast. Hello everybody, it's time for Cows and Crag Dogs. you. We'll talk about that too. Now let's jump into this podcast. Hello everybody, welcome to Psycho Amazonic Cocks and Crudor in the morning! Hey. Wow, I'd like to imagine you got up from your seat, went to the back of the room, and that's why there was this little time delay there. Uh, no, I just didn't know what to say and then i was like ah and then i went with that one you one day you could just say hello you could just say like greetings yeah you could just make it weird uh i mean maybe one day i'll see when you least suspect it well uh speaking of things you least suspect, I was convinced that the live show was not going to be very podcastable.

But apparently, everybody loved it. I had so many people be like, that was hilarious. That's one of the best things you've done in a long time. And I was like, what? Thank God somebody liked it. Right? So maybe, just maybe, that is enough of a tease to get you to come to Chicago next time we do a live show. Maybe next time you'll be like, I missed out.

I had that FOMO. I missed out. And then you'll come to the live show. Shit, dude. Just put it out there. Maybe that's the thing you'll do. Maybe. Maybe they won't, though.

Most likely they won't. The odds are the vast majority of them will be like, you know what? I can just wait for another one of the podcasts. I'll be fine. Yeah. But if you want us to yell at you, come on down. Yeah, if you want to see Crendor rap or maybe, look, can I tell you, my dream is the next live show we do, we get e-money from Ari the One

to come and do a rap performance at the live show. That would be fantastic. Everyone needs to tweet at e-money. I don't know that's his Twitter handle. But find eMoney and be like, yo, you need to come to the next Cox and Crender live show. We'd love to have you. He can be our opening act. I would be

ecstatic. I'd be so happy. I would love that too. Ladies and gentlemen, fresh from wherever he's from, eMoney! And then we can ask him questions about are you the one? It'd be amazing. For me, it would be. No one else would care, but I'd be like, get out of town.

Do they really do that? Oh, it'd be delightful. I'd be like the Andy Cohen. I'd be the Andy Cohen for a night. Yeah, I mean, that'd be pretty great. I hope so. But yeah, how are you doing? What's going on with you?

Man, I'm doing all right. I forgot we didn't do a show last week because that's the live show thing. You were in Hawaii. I was. I was in Hawaii for my parents' anniversary. It was very lovely. I realized that about five days is the max number of days I can handle with my parents. Yeah.

Roughly five days was just, it was like the breaking point. I was like, I need to get off this island. Get me off this island. Yeah, but it was fun. I had a lot of fun. We did some really, really amazing stuff. Most of it, strangely enough, evolved around lounging near water and going and eating fish. That was about it.

Everywhere we went, I got fish tacos or the equivalent of fish tacos and i felt really good about it uh i drank way too much and i lounged around in the sun and felt good about the whole thing it was lovely i had a great time yeah that sounds pretty great i mean what was there anything that stood out? Oh my god. Yeah. Sorry to my dad on this one. There's a thing called the Road to Hana, which is kind of like what you would imagine a backcountry tour through. I don't know if you're in California, maybe the Redwoods. Or you're going through a forest, but in this case it's kind of a jungle. And it's on the edge of a cliff and you're overlooking the ocean. To the left is the ocean, to the right of you is the jungle.

And you're going on this curvy road and it's maybe room just enough for one car. It's a very touristy experience as you drive from the main area to this town called Hana. And along the way there are weird stops and things to look at and little jungle adventures. And we went to this one place that had these beautiful waterfalls. If you saw the photo I took where I'm in my weird Hawaiian shirt where there's waterfalls behind me, that's from that. And so it was a very windy, long, it took a whole day to do this, long road. We got coconut ice cream at this one place. It was fun. Very windy, long, it took a whole day to do this, long road. We got coconut ice cream at this one place.

It was fun. But my poor dad, he does not do turns. He can do roller coasters. He can't do spinny rides. You couldn't do a teacup. It would make him puke. Well, needless to say, he puked not once, but twice on this adventure. Oh, my God.

And the entire time, he was just like, oh, he must have had the worst day. He was so sick the entire time. Because everywhere you turn and whirve, you were snaking through this road. It was crazy. And even I got sick. I didn't puke, but I was like, oh, man. It was rough. It was a rough, rough day. Oh, man.

It was rough. It was a rough, rough day. And then the other cool thing we did is we woke up very, very early. And by early, I mean midnight. I went to bed at 6 p.m. and woke up at midnight. What the shit? And we drove in the dark up a mountain. There's this thing.

Oh, my God. What is the name of it? I remembered it because it was Haleakala, I think is the name of it Because I did Hal, like the guy from 2001 Space Odyssey Leia, like the princess And Kala was the last part So I think it was Haleakala, I think Okay And it's this mountain crater at the very, very top

You go up to the top You pass the clouds you go so high And then you watch the sunrise over the clouds And it's beautiful And it was truly's beautiful and it was truly a beautiful thing it was amazing but my parents wanted to leave at midnight so we could get there and uh see the sunrise and so it's like yeah i'll drive and so i started driving so my parents didn't want to drive in the dark i drove past little deer that we saw on the side of the road i drove through a jungle i drove up the side of a mountain where to one side of the road. I drove through a jungle. I drove up the side of a mountain where to one

side of you was a cliff that fell off into complete darkness. I had no idea what was over there. And I was trying to get us up there. We get to the top of the mountain and my parents and I were like, okay, we're going to sleep for a few hours. Uh, now that we're up here, cause there's limited parking. You had to get there early to get the parking spot in order to get up to the actual, like walk up to the, to the viewing area. And so we got there. We tried to sleep. And by try, I mean my mom and dad. My mom was laying in the back seat.

My dad was laying down on the passenger seat. And they, like, kept bumping into each other and, like, kicking each other. I was like, you're like children. I'm the adult now. Like, what's not giving me any room? And he's like, you're not giving me any room. I'm like, what is going on right now? What is happening?

I was like, I have become the adult. That's what happens. You slowly, as the kid, grow up. And then you become the adult. And your parents degress into the kid. There was a digression. Digression is what happened. And so I barely got any sleep.

I tried, man. I tried. And then I woke up a little Before the sun started to come up Maybe 30-40 minutes before it was supposed to actually come up There was a little bit, you could see the sun Sort of in the distance, like a little bit of light Yeah, we went up and we watched the sunrise, it was amazing I'm disappointed though, because at night

When I went out to go to the bathroom at one point There was, it was pitch black And you could see not just The stars, not just the stars not just constellations, but you know how when people take photos and for some reason they see like the galaxy you can see the whole

universe kind of thing, like the galaxy before you, it was like that it was galaxy brain level just like, oh my god it was beautiful, I tried to take a photo with my phone, but you know, phones are crap and so it was just a black screen it was like, ah, it was beautiful i tried to take a photo with my phone but you know phones are crap yeah and so it was just a black screen i was like ah it was really nice but apparently while we were sleeping i guess two or three couples had gone up to the viewing area and we're looking at it at

night and i was like jesse you're so dumb you should have just been staring at the stars all night i i was actually probably smart because it was freezing cold. I had to wear a blanket. It was rough. But still beautiful. Rough and beautiful. The Jesse Cox story. Yeah, so that's it. That's what happened. It was pretty great. That's pretty nice. Yeah, it was pretty

nice. I'm trying to think what I did. I didn't go to Hawaii. I didn't really go many places. Uh-huh. You know know i uh let's see i played uh world of warcraft go on yes a lot i got level 47 and a half in classic that's impressive that's that is like how often do you play how many hours a day? Three, four? It varies. I'd probably put like, I'd say minimum two, maximum like maybe like five or six. I've gotten to the point where I can't play longer than a few quests.

And when I say a few quests, I mean maybe an hour or two because now that I'm entering PvP areas, I forgot that mages are like, you know, glass cannons. And so if I'm by myself, a wave of Alliance players will just come and find me. I'm like, ah, cool. I got camped for maybe 30 minutes one day. It was just like,

should have called me up if they're below level 47. I'll roast them. In fact, I did call people and they're like Gang squad assemble But by the time they got there they were already gone I was like okay I guess I'll go back And then most of my quests I finally got to the point where the majority of my quests

In zones are like right near the alliance base And I was like I don't want to do this anymore And so Yeah I have a lot of running back and forth. I got one quest that was like, hey, now that you've done this, go across the world. And I was just like, oh. Yeah, you're going to start hitting this. Yeah.

That's why I have a guide. I have the Joanna guide that I don't follow like specifically, but I kind of refer to it like, is this worth doing? And he'll be like, skip this quest. I'm like, all right, it's not worth doing so I'll just do that and that helps a lot but yeah this I went to ratchet I was level 44 at the time and some level 50 Alliance rogue tried to gank me and he sat me and then I got out of it and I death coiled him and then he came back and I feared him and I was dotting him up I was hitting them everything and I got him down to like 10 HP and he killed me and I was like dude this guy

Six levels higher than me got the first strike and he could still barely kill me what a loser I I just it upsets me so much I never have anyone near my level try to fight me and if I do usually I'll just be like Blink bitch and like get out of the home looks like teleport away. Yeah, but uh Every time I've ever been killed by alliance players they're like skull level cool thanks for coming back to this level 30s are you punk yeah this one guy was a warlock and he ran through hills Brad just murdering one shotting people with plagues first off hilarious I like, first off, hilarious. I'm not going to fall to him. It's very funny.

All these, like, 20-somethings just falling to their death. Hilarious. But being one of those 20-somethings, F that guy. F that guy. And he kept doing it. He just did a loop. He'd go all over the zone, around in a circle, and just keep killing us over and over.

And I was like, my heart hurts. Why would you do this? Is this your fun? It obviously was, but I don't like it. Yeah, it's always the night elves. Always the night elves, I'm telling you. It was a night elf rogue. It was a night elf hunter the one time.

I've had one human rogue try to gank me. But otherwise, aside from that, it's always night elves. Also, I want to say, for years, for years as a Horde player, I've heard Alliance people be like, Horde started it. You Horde are so bad. They gank us all the time. I was goofing around on an Alliance character. Just like I made an Alliance character, I think

for a bank or something. I was doing something. I don't remember what my plan was. It was dumb. Oh, I think I was trying to think about the Tanaris bank. That's what I was trying to think about. How you could switch stuff back and forth. So I made an Alliance character just to goof around and I loaded in and literally the first thing I see

is people being like, we're forming a gang squad to go mess with the Horde. And I was like ruthless. Alliance players, liars! I know what goes on over there. I have secret spies. I see you. I see you. You're bad people. I know you're all there like,

Mmm, yes, we're paladins and so nice! Nah, man. You're corrupted. You're corrupted by your own good intentions. Uh... yeah. So, that's been pretty fun. I also learned, uh, I learned how to play the actual game of Warhammer, Age of Sigmar. Oh! Whoa! I thought you were just gonna paint. You've learned? Well, yeah, I was just gonna paint. Wait, did you have to meet a guy? Did you do this in person or did you just read this online?

No, I went into the store and they were like, you wanna learn? And I was like, yeah, I'll learn. So then I learned it and after learning the rules, then I watched some YouTube videos of people playing. Now I know how to play. Man! Okay. Give me the lowdown. Is it all math? No, it's a lot of rolling dice a lot of dice is it a lot of like bs dice where you can roll ones it would be like if i played

blood bowl with you and for some reason i only rolled ones and the game is flawed completely you roll a lot more dice than just blood bowl so like for example you can every unit you have has like a certain distance they can move and then the amount of wounds they can take before they die or uh like some other stuff like that so every unit also has a certain amount of tax they can attacks they can do and then in order to attack you have to roll the hit rolls so it'll be like in order to hit the guy you have to roll a three plus so then you'll roll a dice and if you get a three plus you'll be like all right now you try to wound him so if you roll maybe uh maybe his wound is like a two plus maybe once he hits he hits you really hard so then you gotta roll a two plus and you're like all right and the opponent

gets the chance to do a save roll and typically you gotta roll sixes on save rolls so you can try to save them and then if you don't you suffer wounds that's like the generic like the general consensus of combat interesting so it's kind of like you're playing a dnd game where you're rolling to see if you damage the person and then sometimes you're rolling to see what the damage is on that person yeah exactly so but the thing is unlike just rolling one dice some guys you'll have like a unit of like 10 guys and each one can attack so you have to roll 10 dice to see how many actually hit so you end up rolling a lot of dice and then you can have this is a whole this is a whole day's worth of if you go to a tournament you're maybe one battle the whole day battle is probably like one to two hours wow so i'd be fine doing like one a tournament you're maybe one battle the whole day battle is probably like one to two hours

wow so i'd be fine doing like one a week you know i would love to see you do to take your your snake men not snake men lizard man lizard men yes seraphon i would love to see you take your seraphon to like an actual tournament i would come and and film that. I would do that. Just so they got like some conventions or shit. Yes! And then I could just go there and enter a tournament. I'll lose very fast, but you never know. I could win one.

So yeah, I've learned how to do that. That was pretty fun. I mean, honestly, that was pretty much all I did. And then I just did my normal Kren stuff. That's great. I mean, that's neat. That's great. That's I mean that's neat. I'm excited about that. I would love to see you actually play. People keep being like is Jesse going to

play and I'm like no he's not going to play. I'd have to buy, create a team, learn and manage how to play them. I can't even play Hearthstone and that's free. Yeah. Asking me to come up with decks and stuff. That's the

same thing. Same concept like synergies and what go. I don't got time for that. You need the Slammage Priest to buff the Skink Priest and the Skink Priest has to get the buff to buff the other source and it's like you gotta just go through and then you base it. I would. I'm more of the like oh I like how this one looks.

I'm the guy who picks Slam Bro. Yeah. You are that guy. Out of all the things I could have chosen, I was like, that guy looks like he's kind of tough. Slam Bro, I want him. Slam Bro. And then I put him in purple. So, you know, I clearly have no real skill in the matter.

Yeah, but you did it. So that's pretty neat. I did do it. That's true. It happened. I was there. So yeah, pretty much been my stuff. Oh, wait, didn't you have a story you were going to tell me,

and then you were like, I'll save it for the podcast right before we're about to record? Okay. So I found my, yesterday, our dear friend Alex, a.k.a. Octopimp. I guess on his stream he did some sort of event or something where he said if he hit a certain goal, he promised he would play 10 hours straight of a Minecraft music video on his stream and watch it. Force himself to watch it. All right. For all 10 hours

and the minecraft oh man what was the name of that thing and now i gotta look it up it had captain sparkles in it uh captain sparkles minecraft song what the hell was it it's it's apparently a very famous song it wasn't minecraft style oh f me this is terrible it's by someone named try hard ninja and uh apparently he has many many many many many many songs uh and i don't like it at all really i really oh it is a song called revenge it's a minecraft parody of God Has Fallen in Love by Usha by TryHardNinja and CaptainSparklez.

So anyway, Alex forced himself to watch this for 10 hours. And it is what some may say not the greatest, but it's not garbage. It's not terrible. The vocals are alright. The music's fine. But it's not inspired know inspired music and

he listened to it straight for 10 hours and during that time i stopped in to listen to it with him and as we're going through i noticed that i really hate the lyrics like the lyrics to me really bugged me the lyrics were hold on just listen listen to the lyrics of i think it's the chorus to this song. Because baby tonight, instead of, you know, DJ's got us falling in love again. Because baby tonight, the creeper's trying to steal your stuff again, again, again. Because baby tonight, you grab your pick, shovel, and bolt again, again, again. And run, run, run until it's done, done, done.

Then you run, run, run until the sun, sun comes up in the morn because baby tonight the creeper's gonna see your stuff again so let me see if i can like backtrack a minute the lyrics are because baby tonight creeper's gonna write that but then it goes and run run run until done done done then you run run run till the sun comes up in the morn The morn? The morn is the worst possible It's not even the morning It's the morn And there's no rhyming scheme there

It doesn't rhyme with anything So once I heard it I couldn't unhear it And it kept driving me crazy And I noticed more and more things in the song That was just like That doesn't rhyme That doesn't even

That doesn't even sound like a good lyric It's like a Lil Wayne song It like comes up in the song that was just like, that doesn't rhyme. That doesn't even, that's not even like a good lyric. It's like a Lil Wayne song. It like comes up in the morn. No one's like, comes up in the morn. And the way they say it, it sounds, it's so noticeable.

It was driving me crazy. So imagine Hocto listening to it for 10 hours. And so at a certain point, Captain Sparkles comes in and he starts rapping, right? Yeah. And the rap, I don't, it might have been ludicrous.

I don't know who it is that's rapping in the original video with Usher. But at one point, he goes, I'm a hosta, baby. That's like in it, right? Yeah. Well, in this one, he says, because I'm a warrior, baby. Right? Except in the video, he doesn't do that. He goes, because I'm a warrior, baby.

Through and through. He doesn't even do the thing. He doesn't even do the bit from the song and i was so outraged i was like how can you be so lazy in your rap egg oh it everything about it made me so is it pitbull yeah there you go yeah he's like because i'm a hostile baby and this one he goes because i'm a warrior baby he doesn't even try to hit the high note and i was like it's clear you can you have a higher pitched voice why aren't you trying to do it and i feel like maybe it's either one he didn't know what it's supposed to sound like or two he was like i'm too cool to hit a high note i don't know i don't know but no one's gonna

fault you for not having perfect pitch the whole song doesn't have perfect pitch it's a minecraft parody song that's my problem with like parody songs it's like people act like they're the greatest thing but really it's like all right it's a fun little like fan tribute yes it's for fun it's a song for like younger brothers to listen to while they play minecraft yeah it's not great it's fine and you know it's not a terrible song there There's, trust me, bad Minecraft songs. It's actually very catchy. I get why it has 12 jillion effing views.

I get it. But if you're forced to listen to it for 10 hours, eventually, I was there for 20 minutes, and I already was like, mm-mm, there's some things wrong with this song that I do not like. Yeah, that's pretty bad. There's some things wrong with this song that I do not like So yeah that's pretty bad Again one of the rap The rap lyrics are Dig up diamonds craft those diamonds

Look like the armor's been exercising Again what Dig up diamonds craft those diamonds Looks like that armor's been exercising There's no rhyme there MLG pro that's the diamond sword Come at me bro I got it forged Um I know there mlg pro that's the diamond sword come at me bro i got it forged um well the thing i know

i know there's no rhyme scheme here to this rap and i know rap doesn't have to rhyme but god damn it try god damn it try yeah well that's the big thing even if it doesn't rhyme you gotta try like that's what a lot of rappers will do they'll like force it in but they're so confident in what they're saying you're like yeah. Yes, you don't care. But this is like MLG Pro. That's diamond sword. Come at me, bro. I guess bro rhymes with pro. I got it forged. Forged

in sword. It just ends with these. Dig up diamonds. Craft those diamonds. Look at the swords been exercising. What? What? Dig up diamonds, crop those diamonds, look at the swords been exercising. What? What?

I've always been under the impression that if you take a catchy song, you can sing any lyrics you want to it and it'll be catchy. Yeah. It doesn't matter. It could be like, does the cats have us fallen in love again? It could just be liz it could be lizards it could be paper towels it can literally be anything and people be like yeah that's a catchy beat because that's all that matters and as long as it flows well the beat and the flow baby tonight hypnosis has us falling in love yeah that's fine yeah that's what i'm saying like that one was that the ludicrous one where it's like the same song, but it's Break Your Heart.

Where he's like, I'm only gonna break, break your, break, break your heart. It's like the same style song from like 2010. I'm only gonna f-f-f-f-f-f-fart. It's hilarious. You can do it. And then Ludacris is like, nah, listen. Nah, I'm only gonna break your heart, shatter it to pieces. And that's all I remember from that song aside of the main chorus.

But it's just, he could have been saying, I'm only going to break your toilet, shatter it to pieces. He could have been like, now listen, now I'm going to be like, yeah, nice. That is, that's the thing about most modern rap is that the beat, the music, the flow, whatever it is, the lyrics don't matter all that much. There are some songs, like there are a lot of Kendrick Lamar songs where you're like, oh damn, he has something to say. Yeah. But the vast majority of rap is not that.

The vast majority of rap is like, I got more money than you. I got more hoes than you. I got more drugs than you. I'm better than you. And that's fine, but it's unimportant. Like, the lyrics are unimportant. There's, you know, there are always so many rappers out there who are like, I'm coming at you with a message rather than like, I'm a billionaire bitch. Let's just music in general at this point.

Yeah. And that's fine because I'm not saying rap sucks because a lot of rap is really good, but I think also a lot of it's because of the beat and the hook. And like, you know, it is. It's been transformed more into pop music where it's just a template. And you just, it's like, here's the template for this song. Yeah. So, yeah.

Just watch MTV for five minutes. Oh, my God. Speaking of MTV, there's a new show that came out. And I haven't watched it yet, but I really want to. I think it's called Ghosting or something. It's like Catfish, the show Catfish they have on. Except it's about, let's say you

and I were dating. Internet, that's for you. Let's say you and I were dating and you ghosted me. I would then contact this show and two hosts that I don't know where they're from. They seem very young and probably beyond me, they will then proceed to stalk and find this person that ghosted you.

Jesus Christ. The show is great. And then at the end, you confront the person that ghosted you. Yeah. And then they have to explain to you why they ghosted. But the thing is, do you really want to know why they ghosted you? Because so far, the two episodes that have aired the first one was like i'm banging your your ex so like that's why i ghosted because it was

awkward and the most recent one i believe i fast forwarded through it because i you know i don't care that much but i fast forwarded through it and i think that the last episode was i ghosted you because i heard you talking about me to your friends in like a shitty way. And I realized that you're a piece of crap. So I didn't ever want to talk to you again. This show sounds fake. I mean, here's the truth. Of course it's fake because one of our office mates was on the show where it used to be you go out on a date with a stranger.

Oh, yeah. And then your current boyfriend and your parents have to watch you go on the date. Yeah, I remember that show. Yeah, that show, one of the guys who works at our office here was the ex-boyfriend on that show. And he was like, I didn't know anybody there. I just showed up and they paid me to be this character. So, come on. Yeah. That's why I want to have E-Money on because I want to know is e-money a

plant was he paid to be because he doesn't like he fits in he doesn't like he looks like he's 20 years older than everyone else that damn is already the one season six everyone again go watch that find season six craziest thing I've ever seen on TV it's mind-blowingblowing. Way better than the other seasons. Find that show. Way better. Oh, way better. The other seasons suck. Yeah, they're bad. Season seven or whatever it was, was Garbage Town.

There's one season where there is one guy who's irredeemable, and he tries to sleep with every girl in the house, and it's like, you can't help but love to hate him, and it's just wonderful. It's like Cheaters, that show. I remember. Yeah. They're just like. What the heck?

Oh, man. show I remember yeah With this guy was like come out to my boat If you want to fight me and then I kind of fight on a boat to do that stab you remember that I don't remember That one I just remember when the guy threw a TV off the roof Joey Greco stabbed during show on boat the roof. Joey Greco stabbed during show on boat. Was he actually stabbed or was it like a setup? One of the show's best moments occurred on an episode in 2003 when a woman contacted

cheaters about her boyfriend and his alleged cheating and led the cheaters investigators eventually finding the homeboy frolicking with his mistress on a boat in some random dock. The scene you see above, oh I guess there's a video. The episode climaxed with a violent altercation between

wiry cheater Mitchell, the boyfriend, and the show's second host Joey Greco. Joey ended up getting stabbed in the ordeal with all kinds of security and crew members trying to resolve some order. The boyfriend was seen subdued while Greco lay in the boat bleeding out of his stomach.

Amazing television, right? The clip still holds up 12 years later. The boyfriend was seen subdued while Greco lay in the boat, bleeding out of his stomach. Amazing television, right? The clip still holds up 12 years later. I love how this article is like, it was really cool. Yeah, everything on that show is fake. Wow, here's the crazy thing. While it looked like Mitchell was being taken away by the police after stabbing Greco, there was reportedly no evidence of any arrests from the ordeal during the time. And the ambulance was rented.

Greco was using fake blood. The entire thing was allegedly scripted. Oh, my God. Who would have thought? A woman by the name of Cassandra Torres was apparently paid $350 to portray the other woman. And she was not told what was going to happen, which is why it looks so real. Now, here's the other thing. When asked directly about the episode's authenticity, as well as the authenticity of the show in general back in 2010, Greco and Cheaters producers remained mum on the details of the episode.

Although they did say this. Let me say this. If it was all poppycock, it sure did good ratings. Of course, Joey Greco would say that. If it was all poppycock. Thanks, Joey. Yeah, of course it's all fake. Come on.

Yeah, it's pretty sad. But hilarious. But hilarious, yeah. So that's another great fake show if you want to check that one out. Oh, they're all great. You know what? Sometimes fake shows are the best shows. Sometimes you need fake shows. Even when you know they. Oh, they're all great. You know what? Sometimes fake shows are the best shows. Sometimes you need fake shows.

Even when you know they're fake, they're still great. I mean, really, all shows are fake at the end of the day. That's true. Let's not pretend. Even this show's fake. Yeah, Crendor and I are actually algorithms. We're like Microsoft Sam. I've malfunctioned like 20 times today. Yeah, this isn't real.

This is all fake. Yeah. So, that's that's what we've been doing well speaking of real and not at all fake how about some real deals whoa if you are a nurse or doctor or dentist or anyone in the medical profession or health care profession i think there's something that all of us can agree on. At some point in your life, someone in the medical profession has helped you or a family member. These amazing people dedicate their lives to serving us, to serving others. Shouldn't these people, shouldn't you, if you're listening, if you're one of these amazing people, shouldn't you feel good while you do it? I think so. That's why we vastly and completely and totally support FIGS. It's an amazing company that makes scrubs stylish and functional and good for the good people out there doing all this awesome work. For years, doctors, nurses, dentists have been forced to wear scratchy, ill-fitting scrubs.

Not only are they ugly and uncomfortable, but they weren't designed to be innovative or to have things that stretch and make you feel good or have places where you can put all your different life-saving tools. Nope, that's not the case. But FIGS has created the highest quality medical apparel so that medical professionals can look their best, feel their best, and perform their best every single day. FIGS are antimicrobial. So if you're not a doctor or whatever, you don't know what that means. It protects from germs and bacteria.

It's ridiculously soft, moisture wicking, and four-way stretch. You know, when you're trying to do all the things you gotta do, you're getting up in there, getting around there, you gotta, you know, stretch. It's a lot of stretch. Figs are made with yoga waistbands and come in a variety of styles from classic straight legs to joggers to skinny styles crendor you got what what do you have i know you got some yes i have the uh i have the under the scrub wear so it's like soft oh that's right yeah you got all right never mind i got the actual

scrubs and i have i got that loose fit. I wear them home. It's great. I love them. I love them to death. I got the gray ones. I don't look like I'm a doctor, so no one asked me to save them. I look like a doctor off call. Figs gives back as well, and so can you.

Every time you shop at Figs, they give scrubs to healthcare providers in need around the world through their Threads for Threads initiative. To date, Figs has donated hundreds of thousands of sets in over 35 countries. Speaking of giving, FIGS makes great gifts for the lifesaver in your life. FIGS gift cards are available, so next time you go see your doctor or nurse, dentist, dermatologist, or pediatrician, tell them thank you by sending them a gift of FIGS. So, you, whether you're human or whether you work on animals or whatever, if you know someone who works in healthcare and you want to say

thanks, or you yourself do, figs is going to make it easy by providing 15% off your first purchase by using code COX. So, get ready to love your scrubs and go to wherefigs, W-E-A-R-F-I-G-S dot com and enter code COX.

That's WhereFigs.com. Enter code COX at checkout. Also today we're brought to you by Calm. Are you struggling with sleep? Do you have trouble going to bed? You're not alone. One in three adults doesn't get enough sleep. And if you're not sleeping enough, it can really mess with you.

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Right now. You can get 25% off your premium subscription at Calm.com slash Cox. All right, Crandall, let's go. Chop chop chop chop chop chop chop chop chop chop. Everybody welcome to the traffic copter, chop chop chop chop chop chop chop chop, Chop, Chop, Copter. Today, traffic is looking okay. It's not too bad.

We got some pack up on the ADO. The ADO and you got the B-47 is looking pretty good as well. And watch out for the mudslide over in Mudtown. And then it looks like there's going to be a rock uh rock slide in rock town so just make sure you know where you're going out there uh and it looks like it's pretty sunny over in rain town so uh that's interesting back to you who knew the rock town could be so prone to rock slide that's what i'm crazy right next to slide down too who would have thought yeah slide town that's just well that they just have a bunch of could be so prone to rock slides. That's what I'm saying. Right next to Slide Town, too. Who would have thought?

Yeah, Slide Town. That's just, well, they just have a bunch of slides, like, man-made. Yeah, yeah. But the rock slides at Slide Town are not the rock slides at Rock Town. That's just a different thing. Or Rock Slide Town. Yeah, oh, yeah, that place is a mess. That place is good every day.

That place is totally different over there, though. Yeah. All right, what's going on in the weather? Weather-oo. Weather-oo. Weather-oo. Welcome to the weather desk. Hey, could it be Woppy? He has not been activated in a while.

Woppy activated. Five, five, two, four, one. Yo-ga, yo-ya. Yogyakarta, Indonesia. What? Jakarta? Yogyakarta, special region of Yogyakarta, Indonesia. What? Today, 95 degrees Fahrenheit mix of clouds and sun.

High, 95. South, southeast winds at 10 to 20 miles per hour. UV index extreme. Tonight 68 degrees. Fahrenheit. Wednesday 94 degrees. Fahrenheit. Wednesday night 69 degrees. Fahrenheit.

Thursday 91 degrees. Fahrenheit. Where the hell is Yogg-A-Karda? Let's see. It's right by Surakarta Here's my problem when I look up Yogyakarta the first thing that comes up is the balance mind body soul what? Balance mind body soul all right, so well. It's a yoga and I guess that makes sense so you got All right, so let me explain.

Oh, it's a yoga instrument. I guess that makes sense. So you got, let's see, there's Malaysia. It's southeast of Malaysia. Then there's Indonesia, and it's like on the southwest island of Indonesia, right by the Christmas Island. Yeah, I see Malaysia, Singapore, and then it's sort of further down. I guess I never really think about weird. I never really think about this because there's the Philippines up there.

And then, yeah. Vietnam, Cambodia, Thailand, Malaysia, Singapore. And then as you get further down into Indonesia, you end up in places that I guess I never really think about. Which is weird, right? That is weird. You never really think of... Brunei is over there. What the hell?

Yeah, I guess I never... Bandung. What is the capital of this area? Is it all part of there. What the hell? Yeah, I guess I never... Bandung? What is the capital of this area? Is it all part of... What are the rules? I finally have a geographical thing I have no effing clue about. What are the rules here? What are the...

It's a special... This is a special place. The special region of Yogyakarta. Yogyakarta. Yogi. Yogi. Yogi. Is it

Where yoga's from? Because everything here is the butterfly yoga Mind balance yoga Bunyanta yoga palace Yoga Jogi Aura yoga and tar Is it just all yoga? Maybe yoga was invented there

Or maybe they just loved yoga so much They changed it to a name Yeah they changed it to a name Maybe Wow fascinating You learn something new every day Or maybe they just loved yoga so much they changed it to a name. They changed it. Yeah, they changed it to a name. Maybe. Wow. Fascinating. You learn something new every day.

That's why you got to keep learning every day. Keep learning. And do some yoga, and that's the weather. All right. Let's talk about sports. Sports. What up? Welcome to the sports desk.

Man, there's actually a lot of sports stuff going on right now. We're hitting that peak time. Oh, here we go. Yes. Football's been happening. pretty happy with all that packers are two and oh undefeated so far you're very happy i see yep i see you're very happy very happy about packers uh we've also got uh the lions are one oh and one They tied last week and they won this week. Good for you, Lions. Let's see. Patriots beat the Dolphins 43-0. Many Dolphins players are also asking to be traded.

The Buffalo Bills are 2-0 undefeated. How is that? That's beautiful. They're doing it. And they're actually the best New York team right now. The Giants are bad. They just lost to the Bills. The Jets are losing right now and lost last week. Apparently somebody

asked Josh Allen, the quarterback of the Bills. They were like did you know you almost got drafted by a New York team? And he was like I am on a New York team because apparently they don't consider Buffalo like a New York team. So

everybody had a good chuckle at that one. Drew Brees is out six weeks for the Saints and Ben Roethlisberger is out for the year for the Steelers. Steelers not. Good. Let someone else have a chance.

Ben is, look, Ben you're done. Get out. I'm over it. I was over Ben Roethlisberger years ago. I'm over him now. Well, it's a good time to move on because they are 0-2 and not looking good. Yeah, I can't handle all the 7-7 seasons and all the BS. Get out of here. Get out of here, Roethlisberger.

Get out. Looks like it'll be a rebuild time for the pittsburgh steelers uh and uh baseball is actually finally wrapping up we've got like another week and a half week week and a half left right now according to the playoff things we've got houston the yankees minnesota with oakland and tampa bay in the wild card but cleveland a game and a half out. You never know what's going to happen right there. And then in the other side, we have the Dodgers, the Braves, and the Cardinals with the Washington Nationals and the Cubs right there.

And Milwaukee, a game out of the wild card. So a lot of close battles over in both divisions. So we will see what happens in the stickball and the old sticking ball the old sticking ball hockey just started pre-season basketball is going to be starting up in a couple weeks and then we'll be full throttle also jaguars jalen ramsey asked to be traded out of jacksonville after they pretty much tied the game. And then instead of going for the tie with the extra point, went for two and didn't get it.

And then he yelled at the coach on the sidelines. Coach yelled back and now he wants to be traded. He's always kind of been a douchey type of player as well. So it doesn't surprise anyone. And Antonio Brown's on the Patriots now in the antonio brown side has he played though he played yesterday and he got a touchdown he's also oh boy oh boy i'm gonna never hear the end of this yeah he's also uh has many allegations happening with him and uh other things and uh he's just uh he's a big douche noodle so everyone's not hoping he does well

except Patriots fans which nobody likes anyway and that's sports do you mean the Patriots or the fans I don't like either so we're uh yeah both okay all right all right yeah if you're a Patriots fan you know you deserve it I remember that one tweet I made I was like man the Super Bowl's gonna be boring Patriots again and then like some other teams one guy was like, man, the Super Bowl is going to be boring. Patriots again. And then like some other teams. One guy was like, you jealous, bro. His name was like Pat's fan 52. Some like old guy. And I was like, no, I don't give a shit who wins. I'm just tired of seeing the Patriots here again.

Like, I don't care that they're there, but I'd rather someone else be here. You jealous, dude. Oh, man. I don't know. I think it was a Jeff Ross special that I was watching. It was the one where he went to go roast cops. And it has a great joke about the Patriots in it. And none of them laugh.

And he's like, come on, that was funny. Boston, get over yourself. Yeah, Boston wins like a bunch of shit. All right, just calm down. We know, we know, Boston. We know, we get it. We get it. Fucking Boston, dude.

It's no better than when New York does it. New York's like, yeah, New York, number one. Like, we get it. Cool. Like, I'm in L.A., and I'm not like, yeah, L.A., number one, after we win a bunch of stuff. Especially in hockey. No one in L.A. is like, yeah, suck it. Like, no one's, you know,

I mean, yes, okay, there are a few people. Those people are idiots. Those people are dummies. Yeah, they are. Alright, Crendor. What is our big news story of the day? Big news story of the day. Wow, what is this story? Oklahoma man driving stolen vehicle caught with rattlesnake, uranium, whiskey, and firearm.

That's quite the combination of items. Yes, it sounds like it officers in Oklahoma made a startling discovery after arresting two people a traffic stop only to find their vehicle contained a rattlesnake a canister of uranium an open bottle of whiskey and a firearm an officer is this an old story is this I feel like we've done something like this

I don't remember doing this this is uh maybe that was the alligator up the pants story yeah I think that's what you're thinking of this is wow yeah this is july 2019 yeah uh okay i definitely don't remember this one an officer with the guthrie police department had pulled over stephen jennings and rachel riviera for driving with expired tags uh after the officer discovered that jennings was driving with an expired license and Rivera was a convicted felon in possession of a firearm, both were arrested.

The vehicle, a Ford Explorer, was impounded because it did not have insurance. It was later discovered the vehicle had been stolen. When the impound of the vehicle begins and they start moving compartments, here's the rattlesnake in the back seat, Gibbs said. It was surprising to the officer, obviously. As the officers continued to search the vehicle, they spotted an open bottle of Kentucky Deluxe whiskey near a firearm, the sergeant said. Then they discovered a container of yellowish powder that was labeled uranium. No way!

How is all this in this one car? That's a great question. How is all this in this one car? That's a great question. Jennings of Logan County told officers that he had the uranium because he recently purchased a geiger counter to test metals, and the chemical element came with the purchase. A geiger counter. I just think a gangar. A geiger? The gangar counter. I just think again geiger the gangar counter

Gangar counter Guide your sounds like the name of a Japanese superhero guide your He joked with the officers he was trying to create a, quote, super snake. I don't think that was a joke. I don't think he was joking. I don't actually think he was trying to create an X-Men snake. Wait, so, all right.

When you first told me this story, I, in my mind, was like, okay, there's probably a reasonable explanation. Probably during the time of the impound, the snake got in the back seat and probably they stole the car. So maybe the car was stolen from like a scientist and they had the whiskey because they were like joyriding and the gun was there because she was armed. Right? Obviously, in my mind, it all made sense. What you're telling me is that they stole this car, proceeded to pick up a snake, to then go test it with the uranium to make a super snake, and then they threw the rattlesnake in the backseat, got drunk, and were like, he'll be fine back there on his own, and then proceeded to drive out into the desert with no license in order to go make a super snake is what you're telling me.

Yeah. All right, then. Checks out. go make a super snake is what you're telling me yeah all right then checks out it did not appear that either of them were under the influence of alcohol wait a minute so it's the alcohol for the snake uh you know like we gotta get him licked up we're gonna take this snake out to make it a super snake it wouldn't surprise me if it was. They're like, remember to bring the alcohol. We got to get that snake to lick it up. We're going to get him in the back seat. Jennings is arrested on charges of possession of a stolen vehicle,

transporting an open container of liquor. Operating vehicle with a suspended license and failure to carry security verification form. Rivera was arrested on charges of possession of a firearm after a former felony conviction. The snake was taken from the scene and euthanized. What? They killed the snake! The snake didn't do anything! He just wanted to become a super snake.

Whoa! Maybe that's what they tell you, though. Oh, shit. Right? They killed that snake, but really... He probably was becoming a super snake, and they had to get rid of it. They were like, no, we can't let him in. Yeah, really?

What if he is actually working with the government now? They're like, we have to kill your past snake. And he's like, okay, do what you have to do, everyone. And then they used the radium on him, made him the super snake. But instead of working for outlaws and criminals, he works for the government as snake soldier. Solid snake! Oh my god. Snake!

Where am I? The uranium that I resolved in charges because Jennings was in possession of a legal amount. Where am I? Listen, I don't know where I am. Jennings is also in the right to have the snake. What do you mean? He's in the rights to have the snake. Apparently in the state of Oklahoma, there are certain seasons where you can hunt rattlesnakes.

This just happens to be one of those seasons. But then they killed the snake. How is he in the right for it? I don't know. Gibbs said that it was the first time he'd ever encountered discovery like this. The department received calls from municipalities regarding how to handle it. Because if we run into it, it's going to be a possible thing that someone else runs into it. No, I'm going to say probably not. I'm going to say this is a one-time occurrence.

They said uranium didn't result in charges because he had a legal amount. I didn't know anybody could have a legal amount of uranium. Oh, yeah. Scientists and nerds do all the time. Oh, interesting. Mm-hmm. So, yeah.

That's that. All right. Well, that's it for us. Thank you so much for listening and watching. However you're enjoying this, Crandor, hit up the socials.

Sure thing. We got youtube.com slash coxcrandorpodcast. Listen to all the podcasts. Go listen to the live show. Listen to all the other ones. You can listen to them all there. Or you can go to soundcloud.com slash coxcrandor.. Listen to all the podcasts. Go listen to the live show. Listen to all the other ones. You can listen to them all there. Or you can go to

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for your time. We'll be back with another episode next week. And as always, to be continued.