Cox n' Crendor Show - Episode 234 - Well, this was a week...

Episode Date: March 16, 2020

The boys are back, and remember how last we they weren't worried about any stupid virus. WHAT A DIFFERENCE A WEEK MAKES. From Crendor's panic attacks to Jesse meeting crazy people, the podcast doesn't change but the times do! Join as we try to calm everyone down and make things a bit easy on everyone stuck at home! Stay healthy, stay safe, and stay away from Florida! To get 15% off your first order, free shipping, and a 100% satisfaction guarantee, go to http://meundies.com/crendor If you go to http://getquip.com/CRENDOR right now, you’ll get your first refill FREE

Today's episode is brought to you by Quip. Quip is going to get your teeth looking so nice. It'll teach you how to brush all over again because you know you forgot. And it'll make you establish great habits. We'll talk about that later. Also brought to you by MeUndies. What does MeUndies do for you? I'm going to say everything.

I'm going to say it'll change your reality. No doubt. It'll make you be a better person. That's what it'll do. All that and more. Let's jump into this podcast. Hello, everybody! It's time for Ghosts and Trendog!

Ghosts and Trendog in the morning. In the morning! Broadcasting live, live, live, live, live! In 4-hour recording studio. Recorded! Hello everybody, welcome to an exciting episode of Gax and Crandall in the morning. Uh, uh-huh. Ah, the universal we're all stuck at home yell i see yeah how are you i mean i'm alive so that's good yeah uh wow this has been a hell of a week that's for sure dude this last week has felt like at least three months i am blown away i i don't have anxiety But I get what anxiety is now

Oh yeah, welcome I understand fundamentally When I went out the other day I went to go just get deodorant At the grocery store And even though everyone was pleasant Everyone was fine But there was an air about the place

That was like we are one incident away From a 28 days later scenario Everyone was like a little tense I was like we are one incident away from you know a 28 days later scenario everyone was like a little tense i was like oh no i was a little worried i was like oh no thank you yeah it's uh well now last week being like i bought five bags of rice and five jars of peanut butter you know it's starting to look a little better From doing that That's true God yeah Hi everyone Welcome to the show You're probably in a lockdown like us

And if you're not You should be doing everything you can To be prepared for that Because it will happen Trust me Yeah Literally I don't know

20 minutes ago The mayor of LA was like Hey starting tonight at midnight No bars No clubs restaurants, no gyms, no nothing. We're closing them all down to the 31st of March. So that's a thing. It's happening here. I guess you can order takeout, but that's it.

Yeah, I think that's what it is here, too. It's pretty much like they'll deliver. You can go to drive-thrus, but you can't actually eat in a place. Yeah, I think that's on the list as well. That's crazy. Here's the thing. I know last week we joked like, we're going to sanitize you. Who knew it would get this crazy this

quickly? It's wild. I mean, I guess scientists, but what idiots like us knew? So, of course the show got canceled. We tweeted about it. Our apologies to you out there. It's been rescheduled for August 16th, which is a Sunday.

So anyone who had tickets for this week's show or anyone who still wants to buy them, you can just go to Cox and Crandor. I think there's a few left, so if you want to grab those before they're gone. It's in August now, so if you can change flights or rebook hotels, do that. We'd love to see you in August. We'll have the best Poke-a-pocalypse show. Pokemon apocalypse. Bring your Charizards.

I can only dream. The coronavirus has spread into creating Pokemon. Whoa. That would be neat. I guess that would be pretty neat. So I've had to cancel everything. Apparently March was the month I decided to do 15 things. Everything canceled.

I am batting down the hatches, and I'm just going to weather this storm. I bought a bunch of booze. I've got my priorities straight. Bought a bunch of booze I've got my priorities straight Bought a bunch of booze But you know like staples I got a bunch of rice But you know whatever bread was left And I'm like I'm fine But I didn't buy like 8 loaves of bread

I bought 1 loaf of bread y'all I wasn't like I'll never Be able to Eat bread again. I'm fine. You can also make it. Do you have flour? Do you have yeast?

You can just make bread. You're going to make bread during the apocalypse? Well, you may have to. Yeah, we got a bunch of stuff. I mean, there's also like we've been we still got our blue apron. So, I mean, you know, there's all those services, which, you's good. Which, you know, that's great because you're like, hey, we got meals today. The thing is, I'm very good at not eating. But I just went on, like, this whole year of, like, bulking up, being buffed or, and now I've, like, because of my anxiety, I went back to being like, yeah, I don't need to eat.

And I was still, like, eight hours without eating. And I'm like, oh, yeah, I got to eat. I wish that was my problem. I wish I had that problem i'm like oh you know what what if i had two ice cream cones instead of one i just i don't know i get like general anxiety i think that's what it's called it's called i tweeted it it's called generalized anxiety disorder it's where like people be like what are you anxious about and i'm like i don't even know uh anxiety disorder. It's where like people be like, what are you anxious about? And I'm like, I don't even know. Uh, anxiety disorder. Yeah. It's, uh, characterized by persistent excessive worry about a number of different things. It's pretty much like combine all the things you worry about into your body and your body's just like, ha ha ha. I don't have that

at all. I just simply don't. I wish I was like that. It's so bizarre to me. Well, the thing is I know what I needed. So, like, for example, with all this stuff going on right now, I'm not worried about getting sick, but I do understand the concept that I could get others sick. And I'm like, well, I don't want to be that asshole, so I'll just stay at home. Like that kind of thing.

But I don't have anything where I'm like, oh, God, I'm going to get sick, and then I'm like well I don't want to be that asshole so I'll just stay at home like that kind of thing but um I don't have anything where I'm like oh god I'm gonna get sick and then I'm gonna die like I just don't I'm definitely of the mindset that if I get it I get it whenever happens happens that I think this is fascinating um it's kind of like one of those things where

you know how everyone craps all over baby boomers cause they're like damn it boomers you're ruining everything. Essentially, what we're being asked to do is take care of baby boomers. Really, that's what this is. You are removing yourself from society so that you don't get people who are old or sick. And those are the people who will have the complications and will most likely die. So you are taking one for the team. Like you

young kid are taking one for the team so that they don't get sick. And that's what the social distancing is. Yeah. It's like I mean you can still get sick and have bad things if you're young. But it's much more likely if you're older. Because you know your body is more run

down. You're more likely to have pre-existing conditions. You know, if you got like asthma or you got lung things or you smoke or anything like that, it's going to, you know, obviously not be useful in any way. And a lot of the news reports, I think, scare people. But you just have to read them. Like people only read headlines. But I saw one report that was like 1.5 million people could die. And it's like, oh, my God, that's terrifying. But when you read it, it's like, oh, it's not what you think it is.

It is saying that 1.5 million people could die, but not from coronavirus. What it's saying is there's literally only 900,000 hospital beds In all of America And as more and more people get sick If we don't, you know, lower the curve As people are talking about If we don't do that and everyone gets sick all of a sudden More people are going to need hospital beds So more people are going to be going to the hospital

With coronavirus, right? But at the exact same time Strokes, heart attacks Injuries, accidents, all that stuff is happening still. And so those people factor into that number as well. So what it's saying is coronavirus isn't going to kill 1.5 million people. What it's saying is because we lack the ability to take care of everyone, 1.5 million people could die because we are not being smart about our choices yeah which is why all this is happening right like people are like oh no i can't go to the gym anymore i can't go to the mall and it's like well we're doing this so that we don't have

it break out like insane like we're it's we're taking preventative measures if you get hurt and then you need a hospital but it's the hospital's filled with like 80-year-old respiratory like, I can't talk. And then you go there because your leg got cut off and you need it sewn back on or something crazy. You're out the leg, my friend. There's nothing you can do. And that's what they're saying.

They're like, we need to be cautious because there's more happening in reality than just this disease or this virus. Yeah. Well, it's like even the flu. The flu didn't go away. Flu's still around being like than just this disease or this virus. Yeah. Well, it's like even the flu. Like, the flu didn't go away. Flu's still around being like, hey, I'm the flu.

Just like the normal flu. Yeah, you're absolutely right. So. Yeah, I mean, that's what it is. It is what it is. You just got to suck it up. It's terrible, I know. But hopefully through this month things will start to work out. Because you see South Korea.

You see China. They both had two very different approaches on how to deal with it. But in both cases, it's declining now. I think the biggest thing is just like it's a reality check, right? Because everyone goes into your routine. You go into your daily life. And every day you're just like, I do this. I go to work.

I come home. I do this. I do this. I go to that. And it's like constant over and over. And then it gets thrown off. And you're just like i do this i go to work i come home i do this i do this i go up and it's like constant over and over and then it gets thrown off and you're just like what the shit right like oh i'm alive i'm gonna die one day but you know maybe it's not yeah but it's like you know i think it's the uh i think that's what hits everybody is like the fact of like oh shit i'm just like another person in the world that's gonna i got born and then i'm gonna die one day and here we are yeah i think there's like a crazy panic

that sets in about not having control right because you definitely don't have control over that right and i wonder if the concept of control is what's driving people to do crazy things that they're doing. Like, why are people buying toilet paper? Yeah. Right? There's no reason to buy the toilet paper. It's not related in any way to coronavirus or COVID. It's not in any way.

But people are doing it, and I believe, truthfully, that it's people trying to grab on. I at least can control that I won't run out of toilet paper. If I have to be inside all day, at least I will have toilet paper and rice and peanut butter and whatever. And so people will hoard all that stuff

so at least they have some semblance of like, well, I won't ever run out of that. And it makes them feel a little bit better because on the outside, they have no control over whether they get exposed to it, even though they try. They feel like their government isn't telling them anything. Right. They have no say over it. So they're just like, you know what?

I will do this crazy thing, which I guess kind of makes sense because everyone wants to feel like they have control over their life when really, spoiler guys, we't yeah it's like uh it's it's like the show hoarders or like any of those things right people hoard things for control like i've been saving this since the 1960s and it's like well they're saving it because it's a method of like comfort and like i control some peace of mind yeah yeah it's just a crazy time. Thankfully, I think people are being smart. I just tonight saw a video of downtown Nashville where there were like a ton of people all in a bar together. And I was like, you dummies. Yeah, like that. You know you're not supposed to do that.

But then again, maybe they don't because honestly, we're told by the government, do not stand in crowds. Do not be in crowds of people. Yeah. Stand three feet or six feet away, whatever it is now. But then you look at the airports and it's massive crowds. Or you look at grocery stores, massive crowds. No one has said don't go to

a grocery store. I have not seen anyone say don't go get groceries. It's one thing if you're going to the grocery store to get groceries. You're still risking it but you're at least trying to get something. But the fact that you're just like, ah, let's go party anyway. You're like, I'm going to go to the bar anyway. It's like, you know, you gotta

see the bigger picture. And that's why the mayor of LA, and I guess Chicago as well, had to literally be like, we're closing stuff down. Do not go out. It wasn't a suggestion. We were asking you politely. Now we have to do this

yeah and that's you know that's what happened in italy unfortunately for us i don't think we have the beautiful balconies and like organ music and opera singers of italy we're gonna have like all right this is my newest beat everyone get in the balcony people be like quiet down check out my sound cloud i'm all right with that maybe i think it'd be fun yeah it's uh it's just it's kind of just feels like everyone's on edge you know yes agreed and it's uh including me. I feel like in the last four days, I've just constantly been like, eh. Well, because I know you're on edge, because I know everyone's on edge, let me look up one factoid for you really quickly.

How fast does the Earth travel around the sun? I just need to know this. Okay. All right. Great. It adds the story because I forgot what the amount was. All right. So the other day, I was out with a group of people getting coffee.

You know, before, everyone was like, don't do that. And when we were sitting there, we were having a conversation about COVID and coronavirus and all that stuff. And talking about, you know, what was happening and how it was kind of worrying. But, you know, no one knew what was going on. You know, the usual conversation I'm sure many people have had. And the guy sitting next to us was this dude who looked like a crazy person. You know the hair that sticks straight up? He kind of had a Doc Brown look to him.

Yeah. And he was on the phone the entire time we were having a conversation, and he was like, let me tell you something about silver. You got to have silver. If you put it in the water, it's going to disinfect the water, water and that water that's how you drink to get rid of the covid now no one listens to me and i'm here at this damn coffee place and i told him to put silver in my water and they wouldn't do it and i said put it in the hot water before he makes the coffee and they wouldn't do it so now i'm probably gonna get the disease from these people that kind of conversation so we're having this chat and we're

just you know talking shit and making jokes and he gets off the phone looks at us and goes y'all are hilarious you should have a tv show you should do a show together i think it'd be hilarious i run a production company i think you all should be on my show we were like okay he's like it would be amazing you're so funny i love all of you And then we're like, what do you do? I don't remember what he said exactly, but he mentioned four websites, and one was like Silver Lungs or something. He mentioned four websites.

Hold on. Silver Lungs. Is that a real website? Silver Lungs? Let's see. Silver Lungs? Yep, this is one of his websites. Endless Ionic and Collider Silver Solutions Fast and easy I don't like this I don't know what this is

This seems This will probably kill you faster than the coronavirus Yeah So he mentioned a bunch of websites And then he was like yeah so I do a bunch of different things And I think you guys would be amazing on them And he's like so do you work from home? And I was like, sometimes, yeah.

And he's like, well, I always work from home because everywhere, I wrote this down, just so you have this. He said, I always work from home because everywhere is my home because I live in the now. The earth spins and rotates at 67,000 miles per hour and I'm at a different point at all times within the galaxy traveling at the

speed of thought into the universe I don't know what I thought at the time but I all I could think about was the fact that the speed of thought is the greatest thing I've ever heard he travels at the speed of thought Jesus I wish I could travel at face right he's like I traveled onto the universe at the speed of thought Jesus I wish I could travel at face

Right He's like I traveled onto the universe at the speed of thought And I was like oh my god that's the coolest thing I've ever heard You're obviously a crazy person But that's amazing So he then was like alright well I gotta go So uh You know be sure to check out my Instagram pages

And he has three Instagrams I don't remember what the first two were But I do remember what the first two were, but I do remember what the second, what the last one was. And I will say this, I'm not going to say it live on the air because the last time Crandor and I did that to someone, they literally quit the internet and I felt terrible. Yes. But because I love you, Crandor, I'm going to have you look up this person, his his avatar so i thought this guy was a crazy person right i was like this guy clearly must be a crazy person you'll recognize immediately

that his avatar is of him and john voight which is already like wait a minute and then it says that he's a tv producer and he's looking for people to produce like he actually is a person but all of his posts all of his pictures are blurry Oh yeah they are He's straight up just like My temporary car and then it's a Ferrari What the shit This is my favorite one scroll down It's a photo of him at the movie Joker

It's a blurry photo And then it just says Joker I think this is a crazy person But I don't know Because everything he has Are like photos with him and celebrities And like him going around But then he also has things that are just like

Well you know Gotta make sure you have silver Because silver is really important And then he posts an image of what he says Is a 5 million dollar Imperial Jade China giveaway ring. I don't understand. And I don't know.

He just looks like the craziest man who ever lived. But I don't know that he is. I almost feel like maybe I'm a fool. And I should have been like, sure, mister. I'd love to be a part of your schemes. Because it seems like he's filthy rich. But he's like crazy filthy rich. Maybe he is.

He's got like a trillion dollar ring. Let's see. He's like a successful movie guy. Oh, wait, hold on. I found his website. There's one thing and he just. Whoa. Oh, okay.

He still could be crazy. Here's the thing. He funds movies that are produced on sci-fi. He still could be crazy. Here's the thing. He funds movies that are produced on SyFy. Ah. He still could be crazy. He still could be crazy. All right. My world isn't broken.

My world isn't broken at all. All right. Never mind. Oh, yeah. He's got to be crazy. But here's the thing. He also... Wait, what?

He also has Emmys? What? Wait, he's got Emmys? I can't... His production company has Emmys. I can't live in this world. This guy sat right next to us and literally told us, and I quote, I always work from home because everywhere is my home because I live in the now. The earth spins and rotates at 67,000 miles per hour.

I'm always at a different point at all times in the galaxy, traveling at the speed of thought out into the universe. That's what this man said to us. And we looked at him like he was crazy. Really? This guy, I think, is a genius. I think he's a genius, too. He still could be crazy.

But yeah, he's a crazy genius. He's like a mad scientist. It's like looking at a puzzle. Right? I can't figure this out. All right. Actually, I have more questions. I have more questions.

I am so confused. Okay. So I'm on his... I went to the production website that makes sci-fi shows. And on there, it has him. It has his assistants. It has emmys they've won right but then contact us it's an aol email account so i don't know what's going on are we being punked what is happening right now none of this

checks out i don't even know well and like in a in a blend of just like this last week and now seeing this i don't even know if i'm like alive right now i don't even know who i am where i am what i'm looking at what does this mean what does this mean i had a meeting on a film bringing this person, no name, not gonna say it, and then another person, and then some woman that he met. And he has a photo of the woman. And she has four out of five

stars, whatever that means. He said, but she did something with me and with a handicapped man in a wheelchair and his long-haired rabbit and took him to a CVS to get anything he needed. What does that mean? What does that mean get anything he needed. What does that mean? What does that mean, Crendor? What does that mean?

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. He did something, but she did something with me, a handicapped man in a wheelchair, and his long-haired rabbit and took him to a CVS to get anything he needed. Except hand sanitizer. He's going to be out of there. Oh, my God.

This guy is... I need to become his friend. I need to introduce you to each other. Yeah, I need to see this guy in person because... He was so wackadoo. I can't even describe... Wait, where did you see him again? At a coffee bean cafe.

And he was on the phone talking about how they wouldn't put silver into his water. Okay. And he was dressed like what you would imagine a crazy person would dress like. I can't even. Oh, man. I love this. I've gone down the rabbit hole. I might be the crazy one for not getting this.

Maybe he's just a crazy person who has access to the internet that's also possible all lies right like maybe all these websites are bs websites he's just making at a library somewhere and and because all of it leads to like an old aol account that's not if you're a top hollywood executive you're not gonna send people to your aol account it's just not gonna happen yeah yeah that's oh that's getting a little too wild that's like uh i've been watching qvc because why well qvc i mean qvc's still going you know like they're not shutting down and uh so late at night to calm down i'll uh we'll watch qvc and i'll build warhammer because i'm like well i got about 80 boxes of warhammer i haven't built yet guess i'll start

on these so i've been building some of those and uh they're just like all right today we've got the hp 4500 laptop you're gonna be stuck inside for a month. You know what you need? You need a laptop. So they're just like your kids, your grandkids, you, everybody in your life. You need this laptop. Then they'll call in and be like, yeah, I ordered the laptop, and I'm really excited because my son and I are going to use it. He likes to play games. And my grandson, he likes

the fort night. And they're just like, wow, that's great. That's awesome. You should buy another one. Buy two, buy three, buy four. You don't know how many you're going to need for your whole family. She's like, yeah, I think I'm going to buy another one, but I just

I don't know. I had buy another one, but I just, I don't know. I had to buy food, but I might just buy another laptop. They're like, that's great. You know what? It's going to get summertime. Summertime's going to get up. You'll be out on your porch, your patio. You're walking your dog.

You do whatever. You carry your laptop. You carry your blab. You just put it up there. You got a glass of lemonade. Who knows what you're going to do, right? Right? And she's like, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, anyway, thank you. And they're like do right right and she's like yeah yeah yeah anyway i thank you and they're like all right there you go i hate that so much not because of the old lady or them being like trying to hawk her a laptop because the laptops they always have a garbage laptop oh yeah it's just like every time my mom's like i need a laptop mine broke i'm like all right let's go find one we go to best buy or, and every single laptop is garbage. Even the ones that are – I'm like, all right, I guess this is okay. It never is. We get it back home, and it's like slow.

Like how is this laptop slow? It's brand new. It breaks my heart. I think I'm spoiled with technology because I'm like, how do you use this, mom? She's like, well, I start it started up and I go make some coffee. It takes you that long for the computer to start? She's like, well, it's got to do its things. What do you mean it's got to do its things?

One time she opened MS-DOS or something like that. It chunked along. This laptop is maybe a year old. How is like this it's oh i hate it i hate it well it's one of those things where i think i like qvc i don't know if i mentioned this last time but it's just it's like constant positivity even if you know they're trying to sell you something they're just constantly positive and it's like in a world where every time i go on twitter or anything it's just like eight billion more people are gonna die i'm like all right uh you just you know it's nice to put something on and know they're gonna be like hey everything's all right and you're like okay

it's one of those things where i feel like because we are in such the you know the information age i think it is possible to be overloaded on information. Oh, I agree. Like, I'm ready to delete everything and then just kind of check once a day. Be like, how's it going? All right. And then not look.

Because, I mean, you can become engulfed in it. You can get second-by-second, minute-by-minute information, and you can just drive yourself insane. And it's not going to change anything. You're still going-by-second, minute-by-minute information, and you can just drive yourself insane. And it's not going to change anything. You're still going to be sitting inside, eating your rations, doing whatever you're doing. You're just going to drive yourself insane. I have stopped watching the news.

Yeah. I know what it's going to be. I understand what it's going to be. So I've literally stopped watching it. I can't do it anymore because everything's so negative all the time. Yeah. I mean, we know this is content people. You get more views by creating clickbaity mass drama.

If Blizzard announced something like World of Warcraft, blah, blah, blah, everybody would be like, is this the end of world of warcraft because they know it's gonna get a billion views and i feel like most things end up somewhere in the middle right there's the people on one side being like the world is over and then the other side being like just relax nothing's gonna happen it's like well something's gonna happen happen. So I feel like it's just somewhere in the middle, and it could be a little more to the one side or the other, but it is what it is. It's going to happen, and you just kind of got to let it happen

and just be precautionary and not panic, because when you panic, that's when shit goes crazy. I mean, it's like in sports, right? You got a 20 point lead you're in the fourth quarter and then before you know a 15 point lead 10 point lead you're down to a five point lead you start panicking you're like ah shit what are we gonna do before you know it you're gonna lose the game that's why you call time out and they're like hey you know what calm down all right let's not panic because they know when you panic that's when it gets bad right when you're at war all right

you're fighting in war the other team you're the other i don't know i was gonna say the other team the other team country or whatever you're fighting against is gonna be like all right you know we got them on the road you know they're panicking right it's always the the winning side always wants the other side to panic because when you panic is when shit starts going crazy so it's that's why boot camp exists right that's why marines go through the train they do or the army like all the the reason why you go through all that training is so that when you're there you don't panic like that's that's the whole purpose is they prepare you for anything and then they beat and drill it into you over and over and over again so it's second nature and i think you know what's happening right now with us is something we've never, no one

has ever experienced anything like this ever. The last time, what would be the Spanish flu? Yeah. Which I know there are a lot of you out there like, Jesse, the Spanish flu is racist. That's not why it's called the Spanish flu. It has nothing to do with it being a flu that is Spanish. That's not why it's called the Spanish flu. It has nothing to do with it being a flu that is Spanish.

It's because when it moved from France to Spain during the war, there was no wartime censorship in Spain. So it became known through Spain, hence the Spanish flu. This isn't Twitter. Don't be like that. Yeah. But, yeah, I think because we've never experienced this in our lifetimes, right? Even grandparents that are around haven't experienced this. and so no one no one has a clue and when you hear the doctors and scientists say well we're not going to have a vaccine for at least a year and then at the same time you hear

people be like well don't worry though it's not that bad. It's mixed messages. No one has a clue what's going on. So the best thing you can do is look out for yourself and be safe. So, like, wash your damn hands. Don't touch your eyes. Don't cough into your hands. Yeah. Cough into your elbow. Even that's, you know, then, like, sanitize your damn elbow.

There's so much you can do. Yeah. There's still people out there that just cough into the air. They sneeze in the air. They cough and sneeze into their hands, and they touch shit. It's like, do we have to go back to kindergarten? Like, what? I'm ready to fight.

I'm ready to fight some people. The other day, this dude just, like, went, and I almost, he clearly wasn't coughing a bunch. Yeah. But that one cough, I was like, I will kill a man right now. You cover your damn mouth. Yeah. Like, that's the whole thing. It's like, if we just took these precautionary measures, it would likely, you know, make this go by a lot faster. But people are just stupid as shit.

I wonder what this will do to society, right? Like, I wonder, you know, because, what is it? Habits are 30 days or something like that? Hmm. If we're all indoors for 16 days, or for the last month people are told, wash your hands, do this. Do you think, come April,

people are just going to do that because? I don't know. or do you think they're gonna go back to being like i'll never wash my hands again yeah i don't i don't know it's i'm down for that society where people just go frequently take care of themselves oh my god that's i would be so excited. Yeah. It's a, if anything, it'll cut down on like colds and flus as well. That's what I'm saying.

I'm not worried about COVID. I'm worried about like going to convention and getting someone's cold. That sucks for me. That happens all the time. It's, it's crazy out there. All I know is just don't panic, but it's, you know,

checkers guy, don't panic. It's a, and I think it's easy to panic with the amount of information that you just kind of get shoved into your brain constantly that your brain isn't really capable of handling. You know, turn the day-to-day 24-hour news bullshit off. Yeah. Like, that stuff sucks. They have nothing to talk about except the same thing over and over again, which makes it scary. Yeah. accept the same thing over and over again, which makes it scary. Yeah, and it's, you know, their whole goal,

no matter whether you watch, you know, whatever news you watch, is to keep you watching. Because when you keep watching, they make money. So why would they stray from the things that get the most views? They wouldn't, right?

Like, that's the whole point. Why would a YouTuber stray from the thing that gets the most views? They wouldn't, because they're making money. And that's the whole point behind, you know, just getting. Boy, I've done that wrong for years. Me too. Otherwise, I could be in a mansion right now and, like, you know,

I could have, like, my own, like, anti-germ chamber or some shit. I just want to build some more hammer and watch QVC. That's all I want. Here's the thing. You can't. You should be actually stress-free right now. Because if that's all you want, you now have 15 days to do that. This could be the best two weeks of your life, man.

You could really hit your stride. This could be it for you. That's true. I made it out of Disneyland alive two months ago. Yeah. And now Disney's closed. I made it out of Disneyland alive two months ago. Yeah, and now Disney's closed. Yeah. By the way, that kid, that Canadian kid is the funniest thing I've seen all week.

That kid and the other kid that reminded me of you. Oh my god. Yeah, those two kids are hilarious. Actually, hold on. So if you follow Crandor and I on social media or do any social media at all, you know that there was this Viral video of this kid from Canada Who was like We came to Disneyland and it's closed for 30 days

And he like takes a sip of coffee and he's very funny I sent Crendor another one that was similar Which was a kid who's like Hey I'm just here getting chicken Cause I like chicken, chicken's good It reminded me of him There is another one. There's another kid that I found.

I love kids that act like adults. This is called Apparently, and it's Apparently This Kid Is Awesome Steals Show During Interview. This is the kid. One second. What did you think about the ride? It was great. And apparently, I've never been on live television before. And apparently, I've never been on live television before.

But apparently, sometimes I don't watch the news because I'm a kid. And apparently, every time, apparently, Grandpa just gives me a remote after we watch the Powerball. The Powerball. Tell me about the ride. What did you think about the ride? Well, it was great. Why? Because apparently, you're spinning around, and apparently every time you get dizzy, the slowest dudes get dizzy.

Is it fun? I love this kid. I love this kid. And I've never, ever been on live television. I've never, ever been on live television. Are you excited? Yeah, and apparently I already went down the super slide, and I went down the wall

and scared half to death. I just freak out. I need his name. Oh my God. That is my favorite video. That's my favorite video I think I've ever seen. Apparently.

Apparently. I've never been on live television. Apparently. I've never been on live television. Apparently. I don't know why he talks like that, but it's hilarious. He also kind of looks like almost a young Jesse.

He kind of does, yeah, when you say that. Oh, I love this kid. It's so funny. Go look up, just Google, apparently this kid is awesome. Steals show during interview If you want to watch the actual video and see what he looks like

Oh my god I love that kid Oh man That is great I saw that and I was like the other two videos are great but that kid Apparently Well Apparently Some of y'all

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That's me. That's MeUndies.com slash crendor that's me undies.com slash crendor all right crendor let's go to chapter 7 how's the traffic out there oh man traffic is not existent there are no cars except for a couple cars there's nothing happening whatsoever anywhere except for this chapter copter and i am kind of afraid that they're going to pull us over because we are I don't know if we're supposed to be up here right now. In fact yeah that's

that's them right now. Back to you. Back to you. I don't that doesn't sound like two helicopters at all. I don't know how to do two helicopters. I imagine the helicopter. Anyway imagine the helicopter chasing. Yeah. All right, let's go to weather.

Weather. All right. Well, let's go to weather in 6, 1, 3, 1, 4. Wait. Moho Kerto East Java Indonesia All right. Wow what's going on in Indonesia right now? Well? It's 91 degrees partly cloudy Feels like a hundred and six oh my god. Oh my god. That's something it's thunderstorms isolated thunderstorms mainly cloudy during the afternoonstorms likely high. 92. Winds light. Variable chance of rain.

90% and it looks like the end day. Thunderstorms. Literally every day. 90%. 80%. 80%. 90%. 80%. 60%. 80%. 80%. 80%. 60%. I think it's rainy season.

So literally every day is 90 with thunderstorms. Wow. is 90 with thunderstorms. Wow. Also, 90 with thunderstorms is kind of like the weather I love, though. I like that, too. I like some warm thunderstorms. It's like raining, but it's like hot, and you're like, ooh, I'm out in the rain, but it's not cold rain. Yeah. That's kind of nice.

Yeah, I like some warm thunderstorms. Hopefully it's like that, and you can open a window and breathe in the outdoor air after sitting inside for so long. I hope it's like that. Who knows? It could be in the outdoor air after sitting inside for so long. I hope it's like that. Who knows? It could be terrible. It could be. It's the rainy season. It could smell like rot for all we know.

I have no clue. Yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep. That's weather. All right, Crandor. What is going on in sports? Sports are canceled. But. You're right.

What's happening? The Titans have re-signed ryan panahill the ravens give clay campbell a two-year deal after getting traded from jacksonville and uh nfl's bottom of the barreling this huh yeah uh it looks like the nfl new league year will start on time. If everything keeps going. Tom Brady's decision down to Pats and Bucks. Could go to the Buccaneers, but probably stay with the Patriots. He's going to stay with the Patriots.

You're kidding me. Unless something crazy goes on. And then, yeah, everything else is canceled. Yeah. I saw some guy posted a video. It said, day four of no sports and he was racing marbles downhill. And people were betting on the marbles. He's like, don't watch.

Don't skip to the end of the video. Just bet on the marbles. That is great. That is pretty great. And then. This is where we're at. The Utah Jazz guy that got the coronavirus apologized today on Twitter video for touching a bunch of microphones and stuff. Yeah, I guess that's where we are then.

And that's sports. All right, Crandor, what is our big news story of the day? All right, let's see. There's got to be something. Florida man arrested for impersonating an officer just days after going to jail for the same crime. Well, we shouldn't have let him out days after. There's your problem. He impersonated an officer and you let him out of jail days later. That's true.

He learned nothing. Now, here we go. Florida man arrested for throwing rocks at cars while naked. This guy does not care about Corona. He's going to go out there. He's going to throw his rocks. All right. Florida man is impervious to your viruses.

Yeah. Please tell me. Florida man is already a virus. Florida man is arrested for chucking rocks at passing cars while naked on his driveway on Tuesday. Multiple people witnessed the bizarre behavior of 35-year-old Dewey Kahn and called authorities. Brevard County deputies showed up and found the naked suspect. It wasn't clear why the man was naked and throwing rocks. Kahn was charged with exposure of sexual organs.

That's it. That's the story. No, that's not the story. They didn't even ask him anything. They didn't even ask him. They were like, Ed, we don't need to know why you were naked. Why don't we need to know that? That's the most important part of the story.

I went to a different one, and they didn't ask him either. Why isn't anyone asking him? Did the police just not ask him like hey why are you throwing rocks like that's all they do we hey dewey why are you throwing rocks he could have just been like because i feel like it that would have been an answer yeah at least he would had an answer they were just like we didn't bother we put him in the car we took him downtown we booked him and then we were done with it We don't want to deal with this guy. He's always naked. Yeah, there's so many things.

What a terrible story. Why don't we know? His nakedness is the key to, if it was just man throws rocks at passing car, normal story. Idiot kids do that all the time. This guy is naked. That's the key to the story. That's the key.

Why is he doing this? what drove him to this point yeah why would he be like well no clothes when i throw rocks at cars yeah i don't know um also wind resistance thing was he like i gotta i have to be pure i don't know there's also florida man tries to eat stolen debit card after being caught with it at Disney World. First off, I love that he stole a debit card and went to Disney World. Yeah. I also love that he then almost got caught and was like, all right, I have to eat the evidence. Yeah.

He's out of all the things. He just was like, I got to eat it. Let's see. A Florida man allegedly attempted to eat a stolen debit card when he was confronted by police at disney world orange county police deputies arrested jose herrera on monday he had been held by disney security after being caught while buying gift cards and jewelry at disney springs while disney world shopping center with the stolen card which is believed to have been taken from a deceased ohio man herrera allegedly tried to eat the evidence of his crime with officers witnessing him attempting to chomp down on the plastic

before he could be questioned. When he was found to be holding a bag filled with white powder in his pocket. Ah, there we go. That's why. Herrera is said to have told officers, quote, I'm not going to lie. It's cocaine. Well, there it is.

Gotcha. Okay, yeah, gotcha. Purchased $400 in gift cards and one soft drink using the card. He was thirsty. He had all that cocaine dust. Before attempting to purchase another $360 worth of jewelry, he is also said to possess 13 other fraudulent debit and credit cards.

Police charged him with multiple criminal accounts, including possession of cocaine, credit cards, theft, fraud involving a deceased person, making false statements, and other stuff. Although Herrera's alleged attempt to eat the debit card is unusual,

people typically eat more plastic than some may think. A June 29 study found that humans end up eating an average of 5 grams of plastic every week. The shit? Mouths of suspects. Why would they include that? I don't know. Why would they be like, just so you're aware, you're no better than him. You too eat plastic.

You just don't know it. Why is that in there? Why is that in the story? I don't know. Let's see uh normally people eat drugs instead of credit cards attempts to destroy evidence normally people eat drugs and that's the takeaway from this article you know normally people eat drugs instead of credit cards. News. Wait. Deceitedly edible items have also been consumed in evidence destroying attempts with baked goods in particular.

A man in Portland, Oregon was arrested early Saturday morning after allegedly robbing a donut shop with a hatchet before making off with a multitude of donuts that police later found him eating. Years earlier, a 62-year-old woman in Hong Kong was reported to have made a frantic attempt

to wolf down 20 bread rolls she hadn't paid for before the authorities could haul her away. She was said to have felt unwell after the attempt. No. No. Well. I feel bad because

you know those are stories where the underlying thing is like, that person was hungry, had no food And they had, this was like their last Oh yeah You know there's a sad story there But also I think how they're just like These wacky people tried to eat all these donuts

Like alright Okay Classic Alright well that's it for us Thank you so much for listening Alright. Okay. Yep. Classic. Classic. Alright. Well, that's it for us. Thank you so much for listening or watching, however you enjoy this podcast. Crendor, hit up the socials. We have so many socials. We have

youtube.com slash coxandcrendorpodcast where you can hear all these podcasts. Just listen to them all. There's nothing else to do. Go to youtube.com slash coxandcrendor if you want to see all the animations, watch all those too. Also, we're on Spotify. We're on SoundCloud. We're on iTunes.

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That's it. Thank you so much. We'll see you guys next time and as always sneeze into your arm. Yep. That's it.