Cox n' Crendor Show - Episode 251 - Nap Time For Jesse

Episode Date: August 17, 2020

The boys are back and this time Jesse can't seem to stay awake! Then, Crendor discovers working out in a mask and other important things. Also a man lives it up in a luxury box at a stadium during the pandemic, and we couldn't be happier for him. All this and more on a brand new Cox n' Crendor! To get 15% off your first order, free shipping, and a 100% satisfaction guarantee, go to http://meundies.com/crendor Get Honey for FREE at http://joinhoney.com/COX

Today's episode is brought to you by honey. If you want to save some money online, you are a fool not to have honey. It is the simplest, easiest tool out there. Also, today we're brought to you by MeUndies. MeUndies, if you like underwear, why are you not wearing them? It's the simplest, easiest underwear out there. Come on. We'll talk about all that in a minute.

Now let's jump into this podcast. underwear out there. Come on. We'll talk about all that in a minute. Now let's jump into this podcast. Hello, everybody. It's time for Ghost on Trend Dog. Ghost on Trend Dog in the morning. In the morning. Broadcasting live, live, live, live, live. In four-hour recording studio.

Recorded. Wake your ass up. It's Ghost on Trend Dog in the morning. Live, live, live, live! Before our recording studio is recording! Hit me! Wake your ass up! It's the next Grendor in the morning! Hit me, hit me, hit me, hit me! Grendor in the morning! Hello everybody, welcome to another exciting episode of Gags and Grendor in the morning! What?

What? Ooh. It was like you were trying to do the Doppler effect, but then gave up halfway through. You're like, ooh, never mind. Honestly, I don't know what I was doing. It just felt natural, and then that's what happened. Here's the thing. Do what feels natural. Do what comes naturally, and in some cases, it's instant regret.

Yeah, I get it. All right. Okay. What? Hit me. yeah i get it um all right okay what i got hit me you got things are on your mind yes first off i checked twitter and the first thing i saw earlier was you saying you fell asleep at your desk oh yeah i even got a message from my mom that was like are you okay do you help uh yes i don't know i don't know what happened. Maybe I do. So I guess I just got over. I don't know. I want to say I was overwhelmed, but it's no excuse because really overwhelmed in our industry is like, man, I had to play a lot of video games. It's never truly that bad.

I honestly don't know what happened. I got plenty of sleep. I think I got seven hours of sleep. Woke up. Had breakfast. Went and did my morning stream for two hours. And then I promised GOG. Because yesterday I was on a GOG stream.

And today I was like, hey, I'll stop by for your quiz game show. And I stopped my stream at noon. They were like, all right, well, we won't be ready for you at noon, but we'll be ready for you at 1. I was like, all right, cool. So I put the stream on. I was just watching, and I was playing Final Fantasy XIV. And at a certain point, I was in the middle of a cutscene in Final Fantasy XIV. I was like, really?

Like, whew, I'm kind of sleepy. Maybe I'll just close my eyes for a minute. Next thing I know, it's 1.46. I wake up and I'm like, whew, the cutscene's still going because I didn't click next. I was like, I look over the screen, the stream has ended. I guess they just gave up trying to find me. I saw that I had messages on Twitter that were like, Jesse, where are you? I was so, I felt so bad.

I was so embarrassed. And they were like, don't worry about it. You brought us a bunch of viewers. Like, you were great yesterday. Don't worry about it. It wasn't that big a deal. Meanwhile, I'm just like, I'm such a fool. I told you I'd be there.

Then why I fell asleep? I was just very embarrassed is the whole problem. It's just I don't understand why I fell asleep. Couldn't explain it. Don't know if I've entered hibernation mode. Cause I'm like inside way too much. I don't know what's going on. It's definitely a COVID thing.

Cause I don't usually just randomly fall asleep. So it was, it was weird. I just zonked out. I like a wave washed over me of like, dude, what if you close your eyes right now? And I was like, okay. So I closed my eyes. And I, man, I could have died and I wouldn't have even known. I was like, it was just like, all right, guess I'm going to close my eyes now.

And then I can't even imagine what I look like. Because when I woke up, you know how there's that like like, manspread thing everyone's worried about these days? Yeah. I wasn't manspreading. I was, like, my legs were almost at a straight line. They were, like, so far spread across. I was, like, collapsed in my chair. I'm sure I looked ridiculous, if anyone.

Thank God I wasn't streaming or anything. I don't know what was going on. I, yeah, I just popped awake. I was just like, oh, what? And then I looked over, saw, and almost an hour and a half had gone by. And I was like, what the hell? And so then I had to apologize to everyone. I felt terrible.

I don't know. I have no clue what happened. I could not tell you. And you've never had it happen before? No. The only time I've ever just fallen asleep is if I'm watching TV mindlessly upstairs on my super couch because that thing knocks your ass out. And it's always been late at night, right? It's always been like 9 or something like that.

And it's just late and my body's like, maybe instead we should just go to bed. And I'm like, but this show is so great. No, I've never at noon on a Sunday. That's never happened before ever. I just zonked out. When have you been going to bed? Last night I went to bed at 11 p.m. I woke up at 7, and I got up once in the middle of the night because I had to pee

because I drank way too much water yesterday of the night because I had to pee. Because I drank way too much water yesterday. Yesterday I drank a ton of water. What about the day before that? The day before that, I don't remember. Alright, we're off to a bad start. I feel like, I think, I mean most of the time this week I got roughly five to six hours of sleep every night. That's pretty low.

Well, I get that, but I don't, it wasn't like, but it wasn't like I stayed up late and then went to bed and then got up early. It was like, I went to bed at a normal time and my body was just like alright, let's go! New day! And I was like, what if we slept in, body? And it was like, no dude, you got shit to do. I'm like, okay. So I like did stuff. I got up and it wasn't that I wanted to sleep in. It's that I tried and my body was like, nah dude, we got stuff

to do today. You still need to sleep. I know! I know. I just am very restless because I've I'm very much Johnny stay at home. So unless I have to go to a place

I don't go to a place. And now that I have my now that I have the food shipped to me. Oh my God. Crandall we got to talk about that too. Oh yeah. Now that I have that food shipped to me. Oh, my God. Crandall, we got to talk about that, too. Oh, yeah. Now that I have that, I think I've left my apartment once to go check out the new office that I'm moving into. And I left it once to go grocery shopping early in the week to buy, like, accoutrement for all the things I ordered. That's it.

That's all I got. That's it. I left twice. for all the things I ordered. That's it. That's all I got. That's it. I left twice.

Well, I do know from listening to all my sleep stuff that if you get three days in a row of less than six hours of sleep, your immunity drops by 40%. Well, that sounds terrible. Good news is, thankfully, knock on all the wood, I clearly am making up the sleep and hopefully my immunity is fine but like i i don't know like today literally today i woke up i was feeling fine i went outside and like went for a little walk and like sat outside in the sun for a little bit and just like played crappy games my phone in the sun just to get some good sun vibes.

And then it became – that was 8 a.m., I think, and then it became way too hot. It was like 95 degrees here. And I was like, you know what? The sun kind of sucks today. So I came inside, made breakfast, did my stream. I was fine in the stream. I started to get a little headache and was like, ooh, okay. So I think maybe that's why I closed my eyes because I had a headache.

It was like, I think I should just relax. And then I passed out. I, yeah, obviously my body was like, you need this, dude. But it was so weird. That's never happened before. Interesting. Yeah. I'm not a big like like, passer-outer.

Unless it's, like, late at night and my body is like, just go to bed, dude. And I'm like, but what if we stayed up another hour and I watched episode four of this show that I've been binging? Right? Like, that kind of thing. That happens every once in a while. But that's just, I imagine, getting old. Yeah. Well, I mean, part of it's getting old.

During the day? That is, like, usually happens when you're like 70 or 80 that's what i mean yeah that's what i was like oh chessie oh no uh i don't know i don't know what happened but it's not like a normal occurrence so i'm not too worried about it if anything i'm more embarrassed that it happened during a thing that I made a promise that I would do. So, I don't know. What are you going to do about it? Sleep. You're right.

I definitely should. But I'm going to get calls from my mom that's like, Jesse, are you not sleeping? I was like, I went to bed at a normal time. It's not my fault that I wake up early. Waking up early is the worst. I'd rather go to bed late and wake up late than go to my fault that I wake up early. That is true. Waking up early is the worst. I'd rather go to bed late and wake up late than go to bed on time and wake up early because

it's just like, I wake up and then my body's ready to go and I want to go back. I'm like, I need at least two more hours. I got it. I'm gonna be a mess later today. I need at least two more hours. And my body's like, no dude, shower time. Let's like get this workout in dude. You've been doing it. Let's keep going. Let's keep, I'm like body. No, no. least two more hours my body's like no dude shower time let's like get this workout in dude you've

been doing it let's keep going let's keep i'm like body no no you mainly just need consistency in your sleeping well i don't have that that's for sure because it's like uh it's like how your body clock works like if you eat breakfast at a certain time your body's like all right time to eat breakfast this time it releases stomach acid at that time. And it's the same with lunch and dinner. And then going to sleep, your body's like, all right, we've hit this time. Sends out all the sleep chemicals, bing, bang, bap. You know, you fall asleep. But when you're all over the place, then, you know, everything's messed up.

I was thinking about this a few weeks ago. I was like, oh, man, you man you know the time we spend inside and things i can understand how we as a species could get to mars right it takes six months travel in a ship like we're doing it right now we could do that but now i'm slowly realizing like oh i'd be one of the guys who goes crazy in the movie and And the movie, the guy who gets space sickness and he's like, I got to get out of the ship. I'd be that guy. I'd be the one that endangers the crew. I'm very well aware of that now.

Thankfully, my apartment complex is slowly opening up still. I have access to like workout stuff. I'm like, things are good. I'm not going loopy and I'm moving around and doing things But it's also like I don't know what's going on with me I'm a social butterfly I need like hey everyone how's it going everybody

I need that Because it's not happening I'm slowly going crazy I work out twice a week now I work out in my mask too That shit's crazy You breathe like uh i don't know you definitely can't breathe as well but dr john said it makes your lungs stronger so i was

like whatever so i've been doing that and occasionally i have to be like and then i put it back down that's like 30 40 minutes i'm doing like some intense like weight lifting and stuff and then uh you know afterwards when you get outside you take it off you're just like oh it's good yeah i missed my weightlifting i was doing uh it's not weightlifting i was lifting monitors which is kind of like weights you know uh i was moving around monitors and stuff uh between buildings and it was just like i don't know if it was the heat or the mask, but by the end of it, I was like, boy, I need to work out more. I was like, oh, my God. Oh, yeah. After months of not working out and I started working out again, it was actually insane how far back it sets you, not being in that same shape.

It's like athletes, how they got to get back into shape and stuff. After 20 minutes, I'd get kind of woozy. I'd need to start drinking my Gatorade. uh in that same shape it's like athletes how they got to get back into shape and stuff like i would after like 20 minutes i'd get kind of woozy i'd need to start drinking my gatorade i'd be like and i ate breakfast i did everything but it's still like you're just you got to get back into shape and now oh yeah and then i would get the really bad delayed onset muscle soreness but now my body's back into like repair mode it's just like yep worked out again good to go i love how your body has its own theme music good to go yeah how's your uh how's your oven so i recorded a bunch uh i was this is this is what i'll say i'll upload it immediately after we're done. Well, I have to edit it together. I'll upload it ASAP.

I'll upload it around the time. Actually, when I tweet out about the podcast, I'll upload the video. So it's all together. So the oven arrived, and it looks like a normal ass countertop oven, except the front panel has about 12 billion buttons on it. And I have not used, so far this week, any of them except for two. The scan button and the start button. I've used none of the other buttons. Couldn't tell you what they do. But one of the things is that there's a place in it where you pour in water, which I've never seen in an oven.

in it where you pour in water, which I've never seen in an oven. So I guess it steams as well? Yeah, yeah. Question mark? I don't know. And so I put the water in, and then I've just – this week I had – like, the meal that I recorded was a – oh, my goodness. What was it? It wasn't a risotto.

It was meatballs and something. Palenta? Whatever it was. And so I put it in. You can see from the video, you know, it was just four meatballs and then, like, these grains. And it was like, pour water on the grains. And I was like, what? So I did it, put it in, and it said it's 17 minutes.

Seven minutes went by. It still looked like four meatballs and, like, a puddle of goop. And I was like, well, this can't be good. And then suddenly, magically, by the time it was done, it came out and it tasted fine. It was like really good. The meatballs were like very well cooked somehow.

And the whatever the hell I had made, the grain thingy, was delicious. It looked exactly like the picture that they gave me, and it tasted fine. I enjoyed it. I added a little pepper to it to make it have a little bit more flavor. But other than that, it was good.

It was a solid meal. Pretty much like every other meal prep thing you will get, except it was for one person instead of two. It was very simple i don't know that i that it's worth the cost it was so simple i don't know that it's worth the cost like it was good what i made i enjoyed um but i think it's like ten dollars ish per meal and at six meals that was 60 bucks let's's say. And do I think I got 60 dollars worth of quality? I mean, I don't know. It was six different meals, all of them very different.

One day I made a burrito from scratch and one day I made all of this broccoli and chicken thing. It was very good. It was delicious. I would never have made food like that. Like, it had a garnet. Like, it was very nice. I would never have done that on my own. But do I think that, I guess, living in L.A., yes, it's worth it.

Because things in L.A. are expensive, right? Going out to eat, that's an expensive proposition in L.A., yes, it's worth it because things in L.A. are expensive, right? Going out to eat, that's an expensive proposition in L.A. But the rest of the country, unless you're in a major city where they can get away with gouging you, I don't know why you would spend the money for this. It definitely seems prohibitively expensive for someone in, like, Ohio. If I live in Ohio, I'd rather just keep going to Wendy's or whatever. I just, I don't know. But for me, for what I'm trying to do,

I like the convenience that I can just scan a card and it does all the work. And all I have to do is just assemble things and put it in and then it comes out looking good and tasting good. I think that's great. But I don't know that I would recommend it to anyone else. It's weird. It's weird to love a thing, but also be like, I don't know. I feel like I'm lucky in that I can use, you know, people give me bits on the internet and I'm like, thanks. I'm going to use this poorly and this is how I've decided to use it.

I made hamburgers today. They were very good. We got the ground beef. You put it in the patties and cook it up. Threw some onions into the thing. Grill up the onions, and you get some Munster cheese, and you melt it on top of the burger while it's cooking. Oh, my God, that sounds good. And then I decided to make a couple strips of bacon with it,

and then I do a couple, like, pickles on the side, and then some, like, Flamin' Hot Doritos. Flamin' Hot Doritos? I do love Flamin' Hot Doritos. They're great. Doritos? Doritos. Huge fan of Flamin' Hot Doritos.

Yeah, like, I don't want to eat too many because I'm not trying to make my colon go crazy just have a couple to give it that kick oh did you get that kick what just happened there no I forgot I also bought these lights what so you can change

the color of the lights you ever see that is it for your office? Yeah, so, like, you got, like, all different colors. So, if I'm streaming or something... Mind you, I cannot see this. I can't see what you're...

So, like, if I'm streaming, one of my sub-goals now is change the light color to blue. So, if we hit that sub-goal, gonna get some blue light. Also, you can have... the color you got green blue aqua pink red yellow orange and then like a you really are you really are streamer that's true well i mean you really are minimal effort of a streamer as you can get uh and then i got you got

10 40 70 100 on the lights. So if you're like, oh, man, it's getting a little later at night, you can hit the 40% and dims it down. It's great. I love it. I have seen more and more streamers with that, like, I'm going to light up my background. I don't know that it serves me very well because I literally have a wall behind me.

But people who stream from their bedroom, I see they light up their bedroom like crazy. And I'm like, damn, you made a sex palace back there. It's like all the lights keep changing and like the rooms. It's fascinating. I think it's neat. I, you know, I don't know that I'd have to move all my stuff in my bedroom and be like, welcome to the cocks pit, ladies. And then I'd turn on the lights, but that would be weird. Yes.

That would indeed be weird. What can I say? I was also saying how yesterday I spent my Saturday night going crazy, which was organizing my filing cabinet. Why? Why were you? What was crazy about it what's crazy about organization nothing i love it i love organizing i'm just saying what better way to spend a saturday night than to organize your filing cabinet these days these days that's a great way to spend a saturday night i've been doing a lot of organizing too. I messaged a bunch of

people that I know who are big into tax law. And I was like, question for y'all, how long do I need to keep paperwork? They're like, why? I'm like, well, I have bins in my closet of contracts and paperwork and signed things and all tax stuff, dating back to 2013, they were like, oh. I was like, how long should I keep this? Because I don't want to, you know, next year have the IRS come after me and be like, well, we need to see 10 years. I'm like, 10 years?

What did they say? They said something very cryptic along the lines of like well you know you should keep things for as long as you can uh i was like what is that but that's not i just legally like seven years or something yeah i always thought it was five so there's got to be a real not legally there's a real number out there i just need to know what it is and no one's giving me a straight answer they're like well you know hold on to They're like, well, you know, hold on to things. I'm like, well, what should I hold on to? I know that when you lease apartments or whatever, they ask you, well, where did you live in the past?

That kind of thing. Or do you have evidence or proof? I don't know. I just want to make sure that I cover my butt. That's all. Okay, so I typed it in. This is from irs.gov. Oh, there you go. That's all. Okay, so I typed it in. This is from irs.gov. Oh, there you go.

That's probably the right way. It says, keep records for three years from the date you filed your original return or two years from the date you paid the tax. If you file a claim for credit

or refund after your file... Oh, wait. If you file a claim for credit or refund after you file your return, keep records for seven years. If you file a claim for credit or refund after you file your return, keep records for seven years if you file a claim for a loss from worthless securities or bad debt deduction. Alright, well, I don't think

I have any of that, but... I will... I think maybe five years is good. Maybe I hold it back to 2015 and we go from there. I just need to do a lot of pruning. I have piles of paperwork i pulled it all out of my closet and i'm just like what the hell so yeah i do that that's what i was looking through so i was looking through all my tax shit too in there

that's why it reminded me of it i have taxes from 2012 and i was like all right okay yeah many many taxes still yeah so i like i put all that in one folder and then i put like 2015 to 2018 in another folder and i put like the last two years in a new folder 2018 2019 in one folder and like the three years before that in one folder so i got it all like segmented of like segmented you know i i have because my mom is is dominant in my life uh from years ago when i first moved out to la she was like here is a thing i created that is a bin and it's segmented by type of receipt or bill or whatever and taxes and all these different things take this with you and i was like what am i gonna do with this this is stupid i'm not gonna need this here i am eight years later like thank you mother

so i mean it works it does what it's supposed to do. I just, God, it's just a lot. Being an adult sucks. What is that? It does suck. What happened? This is bullshit. All this, like, got to look out for my taxes and got to take care of stuff and got to not fall asleep on Sunday at noon. What is going on?

Being an adult sucks. It does suck. Like, then it says IRS also recommends taxpayers hold onto documents for at least four years in California. So it varies by state, because I guess states can audit you. And then... Cool.

Like, I just looked up Illinois, and it says, they want you to keep your shit for nine years. Yeehaw. Well, glad I kept them all. Yeah, right? Yes, I mean, I don't know. It's not like it's a difficult thing. You just put it all in a thing and then you just store it away.

Like whatever. Taxes. Yes, I mean, that's it right now. My life consists of falling asleep early, eating meals made for one, and taxes. That's where I'm at. Now that is a dream. He's single, ladies! Playing games

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How's that, Chopter Chopter? Um You okay down there? I fell asleep at noon Oh boy, that's Wow, I thought I was bad Um, I mean, yeah, looking out there I see a lot of traffic

Watch out if you're going anywhere Make sure you got your me-und traffic watch out if you're going anywhere make sure you got your me on these on make sure you're not falling asleep at the wheel cuz you know might be getting close to noon you never know it's when the the old sleepiness might hit you and watch out there's like crazy fire tornadoes and shit all around so I don't know I mean something's gonna get something's gonna hit you others the fire tornadoes, the super lightning the 800 degrees

or the polar arctic it's not looking good, back to you Thanks Crendo, now let's go over to Crendo at the weather desk, how's that weather? Weather, there's fire tornadoes there's heat I mean that's pretty big, that's pretty pretty pretty scary i saw a video of it was like oh okay this is yeah northern california fire tornadoes this all happens in like california

and then like the other crazy shit happens in florida everywhere else is like doing all right well i think the fire tornado stuff is only scary now because people are capturing it but i believe i could be wrong but i'm sure someone who has more experience with forest fires knows this there's the lightning phenomenon that people are capturing on video and the uh fire tornadoes and stuff it happens during forest fires we just never get a chance to record it with a phone but it's been known to happen in the past like actual firefighters know it to be true i think i've read stories about it i don't know but seeing it is different you're like whoa it's wild yeah it's uh you know speaking You know, speaking of that, is there a tornado?

There are multiple tornado locations. Yeah. But none of them are in America. There's Tornada, Portugal. There's Tornaco, Italy. And then Tornado, South Africa. We found it. You did it? Tornado, Guateng, South Africa.

36 degrees. Wow, it's actually pretty chilly. Yeah, I'm impressed. Well, hold on. South Africa, I guess it's wintertime, yeah? Yeah, I guess that would make sense if it's wintertime there. Let's see. It looks like... sense if it's wintertime there. Let's see. It looks like, well, it's also night.

So I guess, let's see. Yeah, 68 Monday. Mix of clouds and sun. Gusty winds. Scattered frost is possible. Winds at north-northeast. 20 to 30 miles an hour. You got some gusty winds.

Tuesday, you got 59. Wednesday, 61. Thursday, 62. Friday, 66. Saturday, 66. Sunday, 71. Monday, 73. Tuesday, 75.

So it starts slowly warming up, but not like crazy heat. It's actually pretty nice. It's kind of like fall weather. But, you know, I expect it to be maybe a little windier in tornado South Africa, but 20 to 30 miles an hour is pretty gusty. I mean, yeah, I don't know. It's like one of those places where it's like good weather Spain and it snows all the time. Well, you know, it's like, is that good weather? Well, let's check.

Good weather Spain. It took me to weatherford texas where there's thunderstorms and wind well that is not spain or good weather so actually you just got two weather reports for the price of one that's a you know only a cox and crendor thing yeah it's only really you know where else you going to get that quality of two weather reports for the price of one? Nowhere at all, except maybe if you go on the internet. Yeah, for free. I guess you could.

That's the weather. Alright, Crandor, let's go to sports. Sports. Oh man, a lot of sports news, actually. A whole bunch of sports news. Alright, hit me. Biggest thing is the, well, biggest thing for me, the hockey playoffs have started. I've been watching that.

I know. We had to postpone our podcast today. Yes, by 10 minutes. Because someone was watching. Yeah, I was watching the Blackhawks. We're down 3-0 in the series. They finally won one, thanks to Corey Crawford blocking like 80 shots. So now they're down 3-1 in the series. They finally won one, thanks to Corey Crawford blocking like 80 shots. So now they're down 3-1 in the

series, but honestly I'm fine with it if they lose the next one. I wanted them to at least get one win. Can't get swept. I feel like if the goalie's doing all the work, that's bad news. It's very bad. But hey, they won. So Vegas will probably

win. Then, Dallas beat Calgary in overtime, tied at 2 in that series. Islanders beat the Washington Capitals to go up 3-0 in that series. Vancouver St. Louis played a night. Vancouver's up 2-0. Philadelphia

beat Montreal in the second intermission right now. Series tied at 1. And then, the... Who am I missing? Oh wait, that might be all of them. Wait, is that all? Did I miss it? Holy crap! Hold on. I feel like I'm missing someone.

Oh yeah, the Lightning and the Blue Jackets. They play tomorrow. Sorry, Lightning and Blue Jackets. Who am I kidding? They don't have fans listening to this. That's true. It is Florida and Ohio, the two most intense hockey towns.

Tampa Bay is up 2-1 in that series. And then the Avalanche beating the Coyotes 2-1 in that series. And then the Bruins up 2-1 against the Hurricane. I know I forgot a bunch of teams. There we go uh and that's all the hockey stuff but it's fun watching hockey playoffs just because i just like hockey um then i can tell over in basketball not basketball but basketball uh finally the chicago bulls fired their egghead coach. He's gone. He was easily one of the worst coaches I've ever seen in my 31 years of watching sports.

I like how you count being a baby. Yeah, I mean, I probably watched something. I can't discount that I probably watched. Yeah, you're right. He was like coaching a professional team like it was high school. He'd be like, we do sprints. We just got to play hard. And then he'd be in the thing.

He'd be like, we got to just play harder out there. It's like, no, you don't. You need strategy. You need to set up shots and develop players, idiot. Meanwhile, over in baseball, dude, Charlie Blackman's batting.446 after like 20 games. That's actually insane. That's very impressive.

That's like actually insane. It's 83 at bats. He's practically hitting the ball one out of every two times at 83 at bats at a major league level. Like that's crazy. If he's on your team, If he's on your team, if he's on your team,

you're about to make the playoffs in your league. Yes. I mean fantasy league, not like... You know what I meant. He's leading the league. I guess the Yankees have a guy in second. He's got 73 bats

named DJ Lamehu who's's actually batting.411. I've never even heard of that guy. And then it's Donovan Solano batting.403 in San Francisco. That's probably why I haven't heard of that guy, because it's San Francisco and they're bad. And then Cincinnati's got Jesse Winker batting.365. That's the drop-off from the 400 club. The old Winker.

Yep. Oh, yeah, and then football's starting. Everything's happening. Everything's happening. This is normally the third week of the preseason, but there is no preseason this year because viruses. So the HBO thing is still happening, though. The Hard Knocks.

So I haven't watched it yet. Who's the team this year? It is both Los Angeles teams. Okay. So it's the Chargers and the Rams. I don't care about the Chargers at all. The Chargers and the Rams could care less. The Chargers and the Rams. I care less yeah the chargers and the rams

i think that's why they doubled up someone's got to care about one of these teams yeah i mean they're not playing games they're probably like screw it just do them both right uh and then yeah so i guess they're just you know doing practices and all that. And then the first NFL game will happen in three and a half weeks. I think it's September 10th or something. So that's sports. All right, Crandor. What is our big news story of the day? Big news story of the day.

Big news story of the day. Big news story of the day. Big news story. What is the big news story? The big news story. Homeless Florida man caught camping out in stadium's luxury suite. Now that is a man who knows how to live it up. Yes. This is just like the Disneyland guy.

Let's see what happens. No one else is using it. I don't know what their problem is. Yeah. Let's find out. A homeless man camped out in a luxury suite at a Florida sports stadium for nearly two weeks before getting caught. First off,

that's their problem. If two weeks they don't have a security guard check on that, that's on them. Not this guy. This guy found a loophole in the system. That is legit a long-ass time to just be chilling in the luxury suite with nobody. Right?

Daniel Albert Neha, 39, slept in the suite and helped himself to concession stand food and fan merchandise for the Tampa Bay Rowdies, a professional soccer team. Oh, that's why nobody was there. All right, yeah. Although, I mean, that's pretty, I'm just going to say it, pretty great. I love that this guy was like, you know what? I'm going to live there.

I'm going to eat concession stand food. I'm going to be in the box. The fact that he had time to go to the concession stand, cook up like a burger, go back, and no one caught him. This man deserved it. This man won his place. Yeah. It's unclear how he got into the stadium,

but his only stay came to an end when employees found him. A cleaning crew went into one of the suites that no one had gone into for some time due to covid and noticed there were blankets and shaving cream and a razor uh clearly it appeared someone had been living there he was charged with resisting an officer without violence a burglary of unoccupied structure and is being held on a five thousand one hundred and fifty dollar bond i wonder I wonder how much time you get for something like that. I don't know. I'm not saying I would go stay at a luxury suite and eat the food at a...

I'm just saying, you know, maybe those hot dogs ain't going to eat themselves. That's true, they're not. I'm just saying no one's using it. No one was using that space. There was.... No, I'm just saying no one's using it. No one was using that space. There was, you know, I don't know. I don't know how I feel about this one because, like, to me, it doesn't seem that bad. I see.

It feels like they should be like, listen, guy, all right, don't do it again. But, like, that's pretty impressive. Right? If I was the officer in that situation, I'd be like, my dude, very impressive. Just don't do this again. I don't know. I definitely feel like we need more of that old town. You know how, like, if you're in the country sometimes and you're like a kid and you get caught up into trouble, the officer's just like, all right, don't do it again.

Don't make me tell your parents. Yeah, all right, like, don't make me tell your parents. Like, we need more of that just in general in life. Just like the officer's like, okay, my dude, very clever, don't do it again. Like, you know, there's no reason we don't have to charge you a $5,000 bond and put you in jail and shit. Like, we don't got to do it. Just don't do this again.

Like, you got away with it, don't do this again like you got away with it don't do it again yeah uh it's not like he's got bodies buried under there or something yeah he literally they were like he was he on what do they say something about he resisted arrest but like not in a violent something like yeah yeah of course you don't want to go to jail yeah they're like he resisted arrest but they said said, like, it was nonviolent or he didn't fight the officers. I have no idea what exactly you just said. But, like. He said it was a non, let's see, resisting an officer without violence. So he resisted an officer.

He didn't fight back. He probably was like, oh, man, don't take me to jail. Come on. Or he probably tried to run man don't take me to jail come on or he probably tried to run which is what everyone would do right i don't if you were like oh shit the cops about to get me you'd if you run i don't know i i feel bad for this guy he sounds like he was living his best life all i'm gonna say is he was wearing all i all say he's wearing a thousand dollars worth of merchandise and drank $250 worth of alcoholic drinks. Come on. Now this guy's pre-publicity for your soccer team.

He's wearing all your merch. He's living it up in the luxury suite. Man's drinking. He did not invite people there. Right. He did not invite. He wasn't having a party. He was just trying to get by through COVID.

And let me just tell you, ain't nobody using that place. And they're called the Rowdies. Yeah, he was being rowdy. This could be Rowdy Daniel, your new mascot. Getting rowdy up in there. Old rowdy. Yeah, where's the free publicity, Rowdies? This makes so much sense. This guy snuck in, spent two weeks. That's rowdy as shit, where's the free publicity, rowdies? This makes so much sense.

This guy snuck in, spent two weeks. That's rowdy as shit. You're absolutely right. You're absolutely right. They're fools for this. He's got all the merchandise on. Super fan. $1,000 worth of merch?

I can't even imagine what that looks like for a professional soccer team here in the States. Maybe overseas where you have an $800 jersey for some reason. But here, they're trying to give those away for free. Yeah. Man. Well, we'll hopefully have another story down the line of him becoming their mascot. I can only hope. I only hope there's a happy ending.

Yeah. I hope they bail his ass out of jail and they're like, hey, come back. Work for us. That would be an incredible story. The other incredible story is the Tampa Bay Rowdies tied the Miami FC 1-1. That doesn't sound incredible. That sounds like soccer to me.

Yeah, soccer, yeah. Or football. Football. Incredible. That sounds like soccer to me. Yeah. No, it's soccer. Or football. Football. All right. Well, that's it for us. Thank you so much for listening or watching or however you enjoy this podcast. Crandor, hit with the socials.

We've got so many socials. We're on YouTube.com slash Cox and Crandor podcast. Listen to all the podcasts nonstop all the time over on the YouTube.com. on Spotify. Just search for us. SoundCloud. SoundCloud. SoundCloud.com slash Cox and Crandor. We're on iTunes. We're on Spotify. Just search for us. Also, tell your friends. Tell your family. Tell your dog.

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