Cox n' Crendor Show - Episode 257 - That's a Good Cuppa Coffee

Episode Date: September 28, 2020

This week the boys deep dive into Crendor's obsession with a good cup of caffeine. Also Disneyland is for kids only apparently, a dude gets in a fight with homeless bike repairmen, and people just be stealing tractors now! All this and way more nonsense on an all new episode of Cox n' Crendor! Check out http://hawthorne.co and use promo code COX10 to get 10% off your first purchase! Go to http://harrys.com/cox and redeem your trial offer today!

Today's episode is brought to you by Harry's. Harry's is out there trying to give you the cleanest, best shave of your life. We'll talk about that later. And also, Hawthorne, get smelling good. There's no excuse not to smell your best, even if you're stuck inside. We'll talk about that too. Now let's jump into this podcast. Hello, everybody.

It's time for Ghostags and CredDogs Gags and CredDogs in the morning In the morning Broadcasting live, live, live, live, live In 4 hour recording studio Recording Wake your ass up it's Gags and CredDogs in the morning Gags and CredDors in the morning! Hello everybody, it's time for the next episode of the Gags and Creddors in the morning!

I wonder how fast I can do that. Uh, let's see. Hello everybody, how's it going? Welcome back to another exciting episode of the Gags and Creddors in the morning! See, the problem is you tried to make your words actually sound like words. Don't try, just go See, you still tried to get Cox and Crandor in there It doesn't matter Alright, wait, okay

Say it one more time Like when I hear that, no, I just think of your Fan Friday thing. Well, it's all the same, really. That's true. You just swap things out. Yeah, that's how I express excitement is through just a slur of words. And gradually increasing your volume until it peaks and then falls off a cliff. Perfect. Perfect.

Perfect. Now that's how you start a show. Yeah. How are you doing? Oh, my God. Fine. I'm doing great. I was like, oh, my God. I'm doing fine.

I got to this week watch a guy get in a fight in a Chick-fil-A drive-thru. That was interesting. I was just in the drive-thru, so I was like, man, I want a chicken sandwich. I had a vibe. I want a chicken sandwich. It's close to my house, and I was like, I'm going to go get one. Right. So there I am waiting.

to my house and I was like, I'm going to go get one. Right. So there I am waiting. And so apparently, I don't know what kind of building it is. I'll have to look at it. We might have to do research on this. All right. But behind the Chick-fil-A is this giant painted all black building. And I see on a regular basis a lot of very attractive women come out of there.

And I assume it's like a modeling agency. Maybe. Right. Anyway. Coming out of that same building was this guy who kind of looked like every Italian stereotype. Like, hey, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. That guy looked just like a dude who you'd see somewhere in Jersey. And he came walking out of there.

And I guess there's a big encampment of homeless people back there. And so this dude was like, you're going to have to get out of here every day. I come back here and I see you guys. And they're camping here. And they're like, we're just fixing bikes, man. We're just fixing bikes. And he's like, I don't care. Take your bike, fix it elsewhere.

There's a whole street here. You can go down there. They're like, we got kicked out of that area, man. And he's like, ah, you can't be in front of here. Important people come here. Important people come here. Important people come here. And they're like, well, we can't move. We're all set up right now.

We'll move tomorrow. And he's like, no, today's a big day. You gotta go. You gotta go. And I'm just like, where the hell is that noise coming from? So I rolled down my window so I could listen to this whole thing because I could hear them yelling. And meanwhile, everyone else in the line at this Chick-fil-A Has done the exact same thing Everyone's like looking, people are pulling out their phones

This guy's like overly exaggerated Every time he talks His hands are all over the place But at the same time he's wearing A very tight white shirt That Is rolling up On him as he gets more and more

Aggressive He's not fat Is rolling up on him As he gets more and more aggressive Right like he's not He's not fat but he's kind of like that Alex Jones kind of like Fat guy who Like kind of has like a Muscle thing going on but not really You know that thing

You know what I'm talking about So he's like every time he talks The sleeves roll up on his arms And his like shirts rolling up On his belly a little bit And he's like getting more and more exaggerated He's like you gotta go You gotta go I'm gonna call the police on you

You gotta get out of here And the guy's like we have the right to be here man This is public property He's like no it's not No this is not the public property. Get out of here. And he starts taking pebbles and like chucking them at these dudes. And the guys are like, stop it, dude.

Stop it. So finally, some guy. So the way they have it set up is it's a, I see this thing all the time. They're all over this area. It is a, not like a full on RV, but like, you know, the truck that has like the camper thing. Anyway, on the side of it are two rabbits banging. Spray painted on the side are two rabbits having sex. Of course.

And trust me, if you're ever in the area, you will see it one day and you'll be like, oh my God. So there's two rabbits having sex. And then out the back, they have like a tarp hanging over two poles. And under the poles, there's these two dudes who like repair bikes. And I don't know if they do it for the homeless community in general. Or they just do it for anyone who needs a bike repaired. But they repair bikes. They're like bike repairers.

And in the area, there are many, many people who ride bikes. That's the whole point of the area where I live. Like, it's a lot of tourist traffic. And so people come down on their bikes, and I guess these guys repair bikes. Needless to say, this dude was not having it. He was like, I don't care. Get out of here. So anyway, the door opens to the camper, and this equally big, equally brutish looking gentleman comes out.

And he's like, you talking to my friends that way? And the guy's like, what do you have to say about this? What do you have to say about this? And the guy's like, don't talk to my friends that way. And it was right then that I hear a knock on my window. And I turn and the woman's like, sir, can I take your order? And I was right then That I hear a knock on my window And I turn and the woman's like Sir can I take your order And I was like no

Oh come on lady So I was like yeah can I have a chicken sandwich I don't need any sauce Thanks And then I like drove around And I have no idea what happened I couldn't tell you how it ended But I know that for a brief moment, two dudes

of equal size and ferocity were about to go at it, and I don't know how it ended. I would like to think I would like to think that they threw down, and it was like a Godzilla let them fight moment, but I don't know.

I have no idea. I imagine that nothing actually happened. Yeah, it probably became nothing. But it could have been something. It's like the Schrodinger cat of epic fights. I have no idea what happened. A fight both did and didn't happen. That's weird.

It's not that weird since LA. That's true. I'm so curious about what that place is, though, because I pass it all the time. And every time I drive by, like, not, you know how there's like, wow, she's beautiful. But then there's like, oh, my God, did you Photoshop reality? That's what's happening. The women coming out there are like stunning. And I can't figure it out. I don't know what it is because there's no signs on the building.

I don't know what it is. And I want to know very badly. But I'm not, like, that invested in it. So I always, every time I drive by, I give it a look. But other than that, I don't, I'm not like, well, I've got to stake the place out. Like, I'm not that obsessed. But I'm getting there. I've got to stake the place out.

I'm not that obsessed, but I'm getting there. Well, I did not have that happen. But what I did do is I saw David Lynch coffee, and I got some. I was about to say, did you buy? Well, you bought some before, though, right? No. Was it me who got David Lynch coffee? Someone got David Lynch coffee.

Yeah, somebody. Maybe it was like Kristen or someone. I don't know. But I got David Lynch coffee. I tried it. And it's pretty all right. Explain it to me. Well, the thing is, I'm a dark roast coffee person.

I like dark roast, like French roast, Italian roast, whatever it is. I want like a darker roast. This is more of like a medium to light roast. The lighter roasts are very like vibrant and fruity and acidic. And so sometimes they're a little too like, you know. But this one, it's not too acidic, but it's a nice blend. So, I mean, it's not a bad coffee. I enjoy drinking it.

But would I buy it again? No. So I discovered, looking this up, by the way, there's an online website. You bought it at a store, correct? Yeah, they had it at Whole Foods. It was like a big deal he's doing with Whole Foods or something. Sure. So besides the website here saying, I drink coffee when I work, Whole Foods. It was like a big deal he's doing with Whole Foods or something. Sure. So besides the website here saying

I drink coffee when I work, not only is its flavor great, but I like to think there's good ideas in every bag. David Lynch. Also, apparently there's more than one variety. Oh, is there? So there's David Lynch

Organic Espresso. There's David Lynch House Blend And as far as I can tell there's also A David Lynch 30th I think it might be sold out There was a 30th anniversary Twin Peaks Blend And it looks like that might be sold out

But As far as I can tell, there's a house blend. I think they got the house blend. Yeah, that says cocoa, bright hazelnut. Yeah, that sounds about right. And then the espresso is rich, luscious chocolate. So maybe the espresso is more your thing. Yeah, the espresso is probably more my style.

Yeah, flavor profile light roast. Yeah, I'm looking for that darker roast. Yeah, this is the David Lynch Signature Cup Organic Espresso. It's a blend of Central American and Indonesian beans. Roasted, deep, dark, oily brown. That could be you. You could be that. That coffee was like $13.

This coffee is $13.99. Yeah, definitely more expensive than you should ever pay for coffee. Normally, I go to Trader Joe's and I get the big-ass can of organic French roast. It's like $8. So I get like two of those for one David Lynch coffee, essentially. So I don't know. I'll probably go back to the old Trader Joe. There's another one.

The David Lynch Limited Edition Organic House Blend. Cocoa and Hazelnut. Not light. Also, this is whole bean. So you have to grind it. Oh, well, I do buy the whole bean.

I have a grinder, and I grind up my bean. So it is fresh. Also, you're probably saying, you know what? 12-ounce bags, that's all right. But what if I wanted a five-pound bag of David Lynch coffee? That's $63.50 right there. Oh, my mama mia. Five pounds?

That coffee better be great coffee. That's like, you're probably drinking a lot of coffee at that point. Like, I'm not even going to drink at that phase. Yeah. I usually only have two, three cups a day. Usually two. So, i don't know that's i discovered this company has teas and i want to see if they had a david lynch tea i don't think he drinks teas probably not oh my god they have, the Airpresso coffee maker. There's a lot of different style of coffee, I find.

Yeah. And I always think it's very funny, you know, like French press or a pour over, things like that. What is your favorite? I'm very curious because you're a better coffee connoisseur than me. I'm like, oh, coffee, I'll drink it. And you're like, well, actually, there's 18 varietals of beans. Like, what is your vibe? What is your coffee vibe?

My main vibe is as long as you buy the whole bean and you grind it there, that's all I care about. Like, when you have a grounded coffee, like a lot of times when you grind the beans, like that's when it's most flavorful. that's when you want to drink it but if you've already ground the beans they put in a bag and it gets air and oxygen hitting it then it's going to lose a lot of that flavor and taste kind of especially when you're drinking it black so you taste everything so i always go for the whole bean grind it myself. In terms of like the actual ways you do it, like the French press and the drip and the blah, blah, blah.

To me, it doesn't really matter. Like maybe like a super connoisseur it does. But like to me, I'm like, if you lined up like five different coffees brewed different ways, maybe I could tell apart like one or two of them. But I don't know. I just, I have my coffee drip machine and that's good enough. When you're using a filter. Yeah. How many scoops per se do you put inside that filter?

Because I know that's a huge deal. Some people do like one scoop and I'm always like, well, that seems like very little coffee. Yeah. What is your ideal scoop? Well, normally I do it by bean count. So I pour the same amount of beans in the grinder thing, so I'm always like, oh, there it is, and then I grind it, and it always comes out to like the same amount.

But I think it's about... What would you consider that to be? What do you consider that the perfect bean amount? Maybe like a little over two. Two beans? No, like two scoops of the grounded beans okay i was like not what's the bean no no no so like uh it also depends how much water you're putting in usually i make like three it's like two to three cups and then i just put in like maybe it's probably like two to two and a half. I think that's what it comes out.

Yeah, I don't know. It's about that. Yeah, I think one is too little. What is the best coffee you've ever had? Clearly you're a man who knows his coffee because I think you explained to me the best wine you've ever had. Yeah.

I don't know if you did on the podcast or just when we were in person. Yeah. And we were drinking wine and you were complaining that this wine was not as good as the best wine you've ever had. Oh, yeah. But what is the best coffee you've ever had? I'd say the best coffee I ever had was, I remember in England I had pretty good coffee, like some little bistro thing. That's probably because they gave you an americano

which is literally just espresso and lots of water no it wasn't that i can tell i've gotten americanos and i'm like oh it's water yeah i hate it uh they gave me no i remember because i got it and i got like an almond croissant there and i remember because they i was like i want just a black coffee. They're like, this is our coffee of the day. I was like, great. They did a pour over, and then they gave me a little cup. I sat on a bench like a European hipster and was like, oh, yes, and drank it.

It was a good time. That was pretty good, but I feel like part of it was just the experience tying into the coffee tasting. I believe that. I believe that. I will also say mine is probably the same. The best coffee I ever had was sitting on a bench overlooking the ocean in Hawaii. It was good coffee. It was like some sort of – I don't want to say it was a macadamia nut coffee,

but it was like some type of from-the-island coffee. And it was very good. It clearly was very, very fresh. So I think maybe that was part of it as well. They got it that morning or some nonsense. And so it hit the spot. I was like, ooh, that does not deserve any addition to it. I will say, when I get my Starbucks Reserve coffees, right?

This one, I'll link it to you. That one is the Brazil-Latin American blend, and it is probably my favorite one. It's very good. Smooth and bold. Yeah, I love that one. If I had to get a Starbucks coffee, that one is what I'd get every time. You know what's crazy? So I keep all these things, I keep seeing next to them the French press, right?

Which I think is like the new hotness when it comes to coffee, right? And I will say I too have a French press, but here's the problem. I'm always reminded every time I see a French press, be it in pictures or at a restaurant, that the fact that I have owned in my life four French presses and every single one has been broken by an ex-girlfriend. At some point in my life, I've dated a girl who has broken a French press of mine

trying to use the French press. Be it shattered on the countertop or it broke trying to be washed. Repeatedly. Four times. It makes me wonder, like, should I ever allow anyone I date to ever touch my French press?

Like, I feel like they're too fragile for most people to handle. I mean, apparently. Or you're just buying some fragile French presses. I mean, that's probably true. I'm not forking over a ton of cash for a French press. Paying, like, you know, 19 bucks for a French press, which I think is still too much money, but whatever. I just feel like there's not a lot to them, right? It's a little glass container, a lid, and then a push-down thingy.

The problem is that there's like pressure involved, right? So if you do it incorrectly, I can see how it can easily break. But I just, without fail, hilariously, four different Xs, four different French presses. And every time I have to have the conversation of like, all right, this is how you use a French press. Like, clearly, I like didn't, you know, we didn't have this talk about this piece of machinery that we have to learn to use together. But all right. And I'm just saying I wonder if that has have to learn to use together but all right and i'm just saying i wonder if that has something to do with it maybe we didn't work out because you know the little

things it all adds up it all adds up over the years every little thing adds up um see i did that oh my god i almost forgot i was i almost forgot. I tried the McDonald's spicy nuggets. Everyone was talking about them this week. What do you think? They're pretty good. Yeah? Yeah. I've had the Wendy's spicy nuggets, and they're spicier than Wendy's.

I would rather have the McDonald's ones than the Wendy's ones. Interesting. But here's the thing. For normal people, you know, knock yourself out. For me, three hours later, it's Heartburn City. So I won't be doing that again. But I enjoyed eating them during the time I ate them. Interesting.

The only reason why I know that they exist is because earlier this week, I was on a call with a friend who was like, oh, my nuggets just showed up. I'm like, what? Yeah, I ordered chicken nuggets from McDonald's through DoorDash. I'm like, what? Yeah, they're the new spicy nuggets. I'm like, what?

You ordered McDonald's DoorDash? Yeah, I do it all the time. I'm like, what? Yeah, they're the new spicy nuggets. I'm like, what? You ordered McDonald's DoorDash? Yeah, I do it all the time. I'm like, what? I'm learning so much about you. Never would have known. It's, uh, man. Like, I've seen people being like, I'm gonna free,

I'm freezing like a hundred spicy McNuggets to eat them all day, every day. I'm just like, I'm freezing like a hundred spicy McNuggets to eat them all day, every day. I'm just like, why? What? I've seen like at least three people that have freezers full of spicy nuggets. Those people are crazy people.

Yeah. There's people, there's freezing them so they can keep eating them. I'm telling you, dude. Spicy nuggets, can you freeze and reheat mcdonald's i have eight cases of spicy nuggets eight cases wait how'd they get cases i don't know i'm telling you people are crazy for these spicy mcnuggets i that. I hate this is what an American thing. Just be like, I need my McNuggets.

Spicier the better. What an absolutely ludicrous thing to be obsessed over. Well, people get very obsessed over like, like spicy fast food items. I don't know what it is. I think it's just the spice. People want that spice.

But the thing is you can get so many spicier things anywhere else. Yes. Yes. It's not even. I guess I haven't had them, so I can't judge. That's true. But I feel like they're not worth buying cases i i i don't know i don't i don't person said gonna go get 40 spicy mcnuggets this person said bought 80 spicy

mcnuggets to hit the minimum delivery fee like a lot of people are just ordering a bunch so they can get them delivered, I think. That's so weird. All right. Okay. Listen, I don't get it. All right. Maybe if I didn't get, even if I didn't get heartburn from them, I'd still be like, I don't think I want to keep eating all these spicy McNuggets. I don't know how, I don't know who these people are,

but I'm glad they found something they enjoy. You know what? If it was that easy, I'm so happy for them. I'm so happy they found love in their life. Not many people do. Not many people do that. Yeah, you know what? Let's have your fun.

Enjoy. Who am I to judge Let's see I wrote down Oh that reminds me of a thing I was listening to There was one thing It was like a podcast or something Of these people talking about Disney adults And they were like criticizing adults That go to Disney lane Were they themselves adults Yes Have that go to Disneyland. Were they themselves adults?

Yes. Have they been to Disneyland? I don't know, but in the podcast, they were like, it's very childish to go to Disneyland, and kids are trying to wait to go on the rides, and the adults are going on the rides and stuff. But in the same podcast, the guy's like, well, it's okay if you go to like marvel and comic

cons and stuff and like i go to pokemon conventions and i'm like you can't just say that and be like well these things are okay but this thing is not because i said so that is pretty hypocritical look look i enjoy some things that a child might like but you know disney's different get out of the way of those kids so you can go meet mickey well yeah and it's like there's plenty of people go to disneyland even like i was reading stories and comments from the thing they were like my like father was like from i don't know it was like a different country and he came to America and he worked hard and he what he just wanted to go to Disneyland and then he got to do it and he was very happy like there's adults that want to go to

Disneyland all the time I've taken my mom did it my mom was like let's go to Disney I'm like alright yeah so I took my mom to Disney I'm like I'm her child can I not go on rides that's what I'm saying like when you when it boils down to it adults are just big kids. And sometimes you grow up and you like watching Disney stuff. And then you get old and you still like Disney stuff. And you're like, I want to go say hi to Eeyore. And you go say hi to him.

And it's a great day. Yeah. In fact, there's some things at Disney you can only truly enjoy as an adult. That's true. I mean, let's be real. There's some things there where you're like oh my god uh yeah when they break out the alcohol in some places you feel great like i'm gonna get drunk and then go ride on a roller coaster yeah i am that's like the time when we

went and then you had the the weed blueberries and we went on the haunted we went on the haunted mansion but it was like the halloween version so it's the nightmare before christmas and i remember just being like whoa this is a nightmare before christmas no comment the only time i've ever done everything at disney is when it was uh some people at the office's birthday, and we paid to have a guide guide us and took us around. That was when we were there. Yeah, yeah.

Took us around, and we literally just did everything. Yeah. That was great. That was so much fun. We just cut every line. Oh, man. That's where it's at. Yeah, that was the man. That's where it's at. Yeah, that was the...

Oh, that was with TB. That's right. Oh, my God. That was a great time. And then, yeah, I remember because you go up, like, the exit line. Everyone's like, what are these people skipping? We're like, hey, everybody. Yeah, you have, like, your own person that's, like, there assigned to you.

And, you know, you just annoy them a little bit. Just a little bit. With your goofs. They're like, y'all are so crazy. What do you do? YouTube? They're like, yeah. They're like, wow.

That was, like, we'd want to go on a – I remember wanting to go on one ride. I'm like, oh, a little mermaid ride. I haven't seen that one. They're like, eh, you probably won't like it. And I was like, I don't know. And then I think we did it. And I was like, yeah, it was okay. Yeah, the Little Mermaid ride is notoriously very boring.

Some of the rides are actually for kid kids. Right. Some are for adults. Like the Indiana Jones and the Pir indiana jones and the pirates of the caribbean and all those yeah there's no way you can tell me that the indiana jones ride is made for kids dude if i went on that ride as a kid i probably would have cried for yeah i would have been messed up i would have been like oh god boulders coming at you and giant skulls With fire and like ghosts and shit No man I would like no

No thank you Then you get old and then you just have a Wee blueberry and a drink and you're like Eh maybe this will be the end of my pain And you're like oh no the boulder missed Sometimes oh my god One time I went with Ted from the office And uh It was his first time

Ever going to Disneyland, ever And every ride we went on Something was broken About it And so, for example, Indiana Jones No boulder showed up So it was Indy like, get out of here There's nothing to run from

On Pirates of the Caribbean When Davy Jones shows up In the mist, nothing was there Get out of here There was nothing to run from On Pirates of the Caribbean When Davy Jones shows up in the mist Nothing was there It was just a voice And like going through a waterfall And we're like what? Every ride

Every ride Something was wrong When we went on The Tower of Terror You know how I guess maybe you don't In the new one It's Guardians of the Galaxy

And Rocket Raccoon Talks to you at the beginning when ours rocket just never showed up and the ride just like started and we're like uh what everything was broken they all worked every ride worked but like one thing was broken in every ride and we're like ted are you cursed what is? That is pretty cursed. It was amazing. Yeah, that was fun. Actually, I filmed that the last trip I was there. I made my vlog of it.

If you search Crank Door Disney. I heard after you went. I heard after you said you were in LA and I had no clue. I remember that. Yeah. I remember when you were here and didn't tell me. Yeah, but then I was was like you want to come here And you're like I got work

Well I did What a loser Touche I made a vlog search Crendor Disney You'll find I put a lot of effort into that And by a lot I mean more than I typically do I don't believe you But I'll check it out it's very good

and then right after that everything got shut down so i'm glad we went yeah you were the last it was you were the last people there before everything shut down for a whole year i remember because uh that was right when like they got they found the covet at the airports we literally flew from and back there. They were like, O'Hare and John Wayne. And I was like, ha ha, that's where I was. And I was like, I think it'll be alright. And then it wasn't. But yeah, fun times, great times.

Go to Disney. It doesn't matter if you're a kid or an adult. Just have fun. Do things that are fun. Well, speaking of fun, doing things that are fun, this is the transition. Get ready. Smelling good can be fun, I think. I think.

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But also, I guess now Harrys is coming to a local drugstore or a grocery store or big box store near you. But if you want the deal, my friends, you want to go to Harrys.com slash Cox. want to go to harrys.com slash cox if you're a new customer you can redeem a harry's trial set at that website harrys.com slash cox you get a five blade razor featuring newer sharper blades a weighted handle foaming shave gel with aloe and a travel cover to protect your blade when you're on the go all you gotta do to redeem your trial offer is go to harrys.com slash cox. All right, Crandall, let's go to topic number seven. This is Scott with Crandall.

How's that? Driver of the Road. Oh, boy. Traffic out there. There's cars. There's planes. There's trains. There's automobiles.

But I'll tell you what they don't have. The number seven, which is finally what David Lynch polled after weeks of doing numbers of the day uh it was a huge day i was very excited and uh finally he's pulled every number out of that jar uh but he's still going so i don't know when he's gonna stop but uh that's essentially the traffic of the jar balls back to you do you think it's going to end up being like a... What's that number? You know, like the mythical number?

Do you think it's going to end up being something crazy in the end? Oh, it definitely has to be. I'm trying to think of what that's called. You know, like in Da Vinci Code? You know, like one of those things? Where it's like a number that is like the god particle, right? Is it going to be something wild? I mean, it's David Lynch, so it's got to be wild.

If it's not wild. Or is he just doing it because it's absurd? Like the absurdity of it? That could also be. You think it's crazy, but really he's just doing it to see until people start cracking and being like, I just don't know what it's about. That's the number, right? Yeah.

It could be any of those things. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. All right. Let's go to the weather. Weather time. Let's see. We got any suggestions for weather today?

The top comment on YouTube is my home country Luxembourg, because why report on a city when you can do it just as easily for an entire country? Touche. Let's do it. Sure. Why not? Luxembourg. Luxembourg.

Luxembourg. Luxembourg. Luxembourg is what it says. So nice they named it thrice. Thrice. I'll let Woppy do it. Woppy activated. Luxembourg, Luxembourg, Luxembourg weather.

47 degrees Fahrenheit. Cloudy. 5% chance of rain today's forecast 47 feels like 54 high 54 low 50 humidity 93% pressure 29.81 inches visibility 10 miles. 3 miles per hour. 10 day. Tuesday. 62 degrees. AM rain.

Oh wait, forgot Monday. Monday. Cloudy skies with periods of rain. This afternoon. High around 55 winds south at 5 to 10 miles per hour. Chance of rain. AM rain.

80%. Wednesday, 65. Light rain. Thursday, 58. Light rain. Friday, 56. AM rain. Saturday, 57.

Rain. Sunday, rain. Monday, rain. Tuesday, rain. Wednesday, rain. Thursday, rain. Friday, rain. Saturday, rain Monday, rain Tuesday, rain Wednesday, rain Thursday, rain Friday, rain Saturday, rain

Rain, rain, rain, rain, rain It's not even broken, it's rain every day That sounds like the refrain of a late 90s rap song Instead of rain though, where it's like R-A-I-N It's sort of like rain like a king And I imagine the rap song clearly has something to do with like Raining Over the strip club

And it's like Monday rain Tuesday rain Thursday what And it's like someone in the back like Luxembourg Luxembourg Luxembourg Yeah Rain Rain someone in the back like Luxembourg, Luxembourg, Luxembourg, Luxembourg. Yeah. We like to do it in the burg.

Rain, rain, rain. You need that? You need the whoppy rain voice? I don't know if you've heard. Oh, my God. I like booties in Luxembourg. Rain, rain, rain, rain. Tuesday.

Luxembourg, Luxembourg, Luxembourg. Wednesday. Tuesday. Luxembourg. Luxembourg. Luxembourg. Wednesday. Yeah. Yo, those winds hitting that 5 to 10 miles an hour. Do they even use miles per hour? I don't think they do. I think it would be kilometers. Fahrenheit.

You can convert the Fahrenheits. Yeah, you can do it yourself. You're smarter than us. You'll figure it out. That's your puzzle of the day. And that's the weather. All right, let's go to sports. Sports.

Boy, we got some big sports news today. First off, over in the NBA, we've got an NBA final. It's the Miami Heat and the Los Angeles Lakers competing in the finals there. Over in the NHL, Stanley Cup. Tampa Bay up 3-2 on the Stars, trying to close it out, but the Stars not going away, and I believe that Tampa

Bay's best player, Stamkos, is out for the rest of the Stanley Cup final. Uh-oh, what could happen? Uh-oh. Over in baseball, the playoffs are about to begin. Final regular season games are today, so the playoffs are as follows. The Rays taking on the Jays. The Indians taking on the Yankees.

The Twins and the Astros. The Athletics and the White Sox. The Dodgers and the Brewers. The Padres and the Cardinals. The Cubs and the Marlins and the Braves and the Reds. And all these games are a best of three. So this is going to be a wacky-ass baseball playoff. And then that'll go to the best of five and then the best of seven.

I, for one, welcome a baseball season this short. I think if they could do this every year, I'd be happier. I might actually watch. Yeah. Honestly, I think it was a pretty fitting schedule. It felt like everything was fine. Yeah, it felt like everything mattered and it wasn't like, game 265 of the regular

season. And then they play like 175 games and then it goes down to like, and here's the best of five. Yeah. At least for the best of three, you're like, well, I guess we only played, like, 60-something games. So, all right.

Right? At least it felt like it mattered a little bit instead of, like, all right, coming up to bat for his 9,000th time this season. Yeah. And, like, you know, we got to see who the best teams were. If you're not going to be good in, like, 60-something games, you're probably not good. You're absolutely right. If it takes you longer than 60 games to find your streak, that's a problem.

There's going to be someone like, well, the 1997 Houston Astros. Alright, there's like some random anomalies in there, but the vast majority is whatever. You're right. Sports fans would definitely be like, well, actually in 1976 the Padres.

The 1997 Houston Astros came back after the All-Star break to win 40 games straight. Cool, man. It's so cool. So cool, dude. Yeah. Then we had football. Football, football, football. The Pittsburgh Steelers beat the Houston Texans 28-21.

Ooh, the Bengals and the Eagles tied. That's right. How do you know your team's bad when you're tying the Bengals? Oh yeah, that's not good. The Giants lost to the beat up 49ers. 49ers had their backup quarterback and backup players and still

crushed them. The Patriots beat the Las Vegas Raiders. Somehow, someway, the Patriots still good. I know the way. It involves cheating. Yep, probably. The Titans beat the Vikings 31-30. The Cleveland Browns beat the Washington football team 34-20.

And the Browns, I believe, had their first winning record in years. They're 2-1 now. I'm so... You know what? I don't like this. I'm so upset that we're giving them hope. I don't like this. I saw a video. I don't know. Do the Browns lose their first game?

Yes. They lost to the Ravens, who are probably the best team in the AFC. Well, the Ravens were the Browns at one point That's true, yes But uh I saw a video after their first game I think it might have been that It was I guess the loss

Since they're 2-1 And it was people coming out of the game And this guy was like Good team Browns Like a rewish jersey on the ground He was like, we're, Browns! Like, through his jersey on the ground. He was like, we're never going to win! It was hilarious. I was like, ah, a Cleveland fan.

Oh, yeah. Just being in Ohio in general. Man, and speaking of sadness, beat the washington football team who are one and two and tied in first place in the nfc oh my god with the dallas cowboys at one and two and the eagles now oh two and one and the giants oh and three so the nfc east looking like they're probably the worst division in maybe sports. In all of sports. In all of sports. In the

NFC West, the Seahawks are 3-0 and the Cardinals, Rams, and 49ers are all 2-1. So all those teams could be in first place in the NFC East if they wanted. Other games that happened, Buffalo beat the Rams to go to 3-0. First place, Buffalo beat the Rams to go to 3-0.

First place Buffalo. Wow. They actually have a quarterback now. It's great. The Bills putting in work. Yeah. The Bears somehow beat the Falcons who blew a 20-point lead for the second straight week, just like they did in the Super Bowl three years ago.

Burst, burst, burst, burst, burst, burst. I hate it because they're tied with the Packers, but they're not good. They're a bad team. Then the Panthers beat the Chargers. The Colts destroyed the Jets, who are probably the worst team in football. The Seahawks beat the Cowboys. The Buccaneer Bradys beat the Broncos.

The Lions beat the Cardinals. And the Packers beat the New Orleans Saints tonight. Great game. Watched it. And the Packers still 3-0. I'm loving it. Packers head coach is 16-3 since taking over last year. And then in sad news. What if he won a Super Bowl?

No, but we got a game away in his first year. I'll take it. Okay. But the big news I know everybody's waiting for. Where's the Minshew? He lost on Thursday night 31-13 to the Miami Dolphins. Okay. But the big news I know everybody's waiting for, where's the Minshew? He lost on Thursday night 31-13 to the Miami Dolphins. You know what?

That was all his team's fault. It was. He did nothing wrong. Yeah. Honestly, the defense was bad. He wasn't on the defense. The points weren't scored against him. He went 30 of 42, 275 yards and an interception. So really, he only

made like one bad play. Everyone else, though. Everyone else let him down. Yeah. Come on, team. Come on. If we gotta trade him to a better team, so be it. Minshew is gonna be the next big thing and we're getting on the ground floor. Exactly. He needs to go to a team that respects thing, and we're getting on the ground floor. Exactly.

He needs to go to a team that respects him, like the Washington football team. Exactly. Exactly. That's sports. All right, Crender, what's our big news story of the day? Big news story of the day. Of the day. Of the day.

Of the day. Uh-huh. Man driving stolen construction machinery in Keys tells deputies, I like it. What? What? What? A man stopped by sheriff deputies in Florida Keys for driving a stolen construction vehicle on US 1 told them he was operating the machinery because, quote, I like it.

I mean, if there's ever a reason to do anything, it's a good one. Christopher Paul Hawkins, 35, was driving heavy machinery with no lights on when a Monroe County sheriff's deputy pulled him over at 1.35 a.m. Wednesday southbound on US 1, near mile marker 30. When the deputy approached the driver inside the construction vehicle, he recognized Hawkins as someone he had seen walking just moments before along the same road. The deputy also thought the construction equipment looked familiar, too. He was right. They identified the machinery as a Lee boy 685b grader which is part of a road construction project

underway a few hundred feet from where he was stopped you know you know you know we have at least one listener is like oh boy lee boy that's the best kind of gradater. Leboy's a great grater, tell you what. That's a great grater right there. Hawkins. I see why it's stolen. That's a good ass grater. I've seen a few graders in my day, but a 685B ain't getting beat. Leboy, 685B can't beat that. Hawkins also denied driving the machinery.

And he appeared to be intoxicated That all checks out as well He had trouble standing He stated he didn't remember how much he had to drink But that his pickup truck was parked at a bar on Little Torch Key The deputy walked to the construction site Where he saw a path left by the vehicle Noted that when Hawkins took the gradader, he damaged the sidewalk and the roadway. A company that owns the vehicle was called.

They stated the Grader was valued at $120,000 and Hawkins was taken to jail. That's a lot of damage. I hope that ride was worth it. It wasn't. Well, it could have been for him. Maybe it was. Maybe that was a million-dollar ride for him. He's like, dude, only $120,000?

That was worth it. I've always wanted to drive a Grater. There's also this other story on a similar note. Manicues of breaking into Brewers Stadium takes tractor joyride. Everyone's riding machinery. What is happening? I think people are just bored. I think people are stuck inside and just bored.

Breaking and entering and riding a tractor, Keon Lambert was charged with a felony count of criminal damage to property and misdemeanor disorderly conduct in June after he was accused of breaking into the Brewers Miller Park in Milwaukee and taking a joyride on a tractor. A criminal complaint details how the 40 year old lambert tried to carve his name in cursive on the field yeah that's pretty great uh the damage for the offense offensive

mounted to 40 000 hey that's three times less uh said, and a pained footage of Lambert on the tractor digging holes in the grass and dirt before Milwaukee resident ran the bases backwards to complete his destructive escapade. He bad news bears that thing. Amazing. He did. Amazing.

And those are the two stories I got. The two most important stories of the week, obviously. No doubt. All right. Well, that's it for us. Thanks so much for listening or watching or however you're enjoying this podcast. Crendor, hit them with the socials. We got so many socials.

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Also, comment, like, subscribe. Hit the bell. Watch old episodes. Share with your friends, family, dog, cat, Luxemburgians, and whoever else. Also, check out our main stuff. We got YouTube.com slash Jessica Cox. YouTube.com slash Crandor. Twitch.tv slash JessicaX. YouTube.com slash Cronor. Twitch.tv slash JessicaX.

Twitch.tv slash Cronor. Facebook.com slash Facebook. Twitter.com slash JessicaX. Twitter.com slash Twitter. Do you think they're called Luxemburgers? And if so, are they delicious? There's got to be a Luxemburger in Luxemburg. But I don't know if the citizens are called it or if there's a bar that just serves luxemburgers i don't know we'll find out i now need to go to luxembourg all right anyway that's it for us we'll see y'all next week and as always boy to be continued.