Cox n' Crendor Show - Episode 288 - Transcendental House Funk

Episode Date: May 9, 2021

On this new episode of Cox n' Crendor, Jesse discovers that he'd be best off spending his time in Ibiza making the next wave of techno. Meanwhile Crendor continues to slowly fall apart! But hey at least we both got our shots!!! All this and more on a brand new Cox n' Crendor! Go to http://calm.com/COX for 40% off unlimited access to Calm's entire library. Go to http://babbel.com and use promo code COX to get an extra 3 months free!

Today's episode is brought to you by Calm. If you are feeling it because of the changing temperature or because of anxiety or because of whatever, I don't even know, Calm is the app for you. Also today, we're brought to you by Babbel. If you're trying to learn a new language, Babbel is the easiest, best way. I'm doing it right now. I'm actually doing it right now. We'll talk about that later as well.

Let's jump into this podcast. Hello, everybody. It's time for Ghost on Trend Dog. This is Trend Dog in the morning. In the morning. Broadcasting live, live, live, live, live. In 4-hour recording studio. Recorded.

Wake your ass up. It's Ghost on Trenda in the morning. Excitement. Adventure. Bro. I don't know what noise to make. I actually kind of hurt my voice with the last noise. My throat's like...

We should probably just cut it here. Yeah, we should. All right. Well, that's it. Thanks, everybody. Thanks for tuning in. All right. Good episode.

Good stuff. Good stuff. Yeah. Great. Wow. Look at us, professionals. Unbelievably professional. Yeah, almost. How many episodes? 300 episodes now?

Almost. Figured we would have learned how to do this thing, but here we are. You would think that. I'll tell you one thing. Yeah. I'll tell you one thing. That's all you're getting from me. I'll take one thing. I got a Coca-Cola right here.

Oh, man. I haven't had a Coke in like five months. I haven't had it in a while either. Why you got to torture me like that? I'm trying to be good over here, and you're like, I got a Coca-Cola. So good. I'm just like, be strong, Jesse. Drink your water. It's so good. I'm just like, be strong, Jesse. Drink your water.

It's so good. It's pretty good. I actually haven't had soda in, it's been a while, probably a month. Yeah, that sounds terrible. And even then, like I drink like maybe a third of it, and then I'm like, that's all I want. That's all I want. I want all the soda all the time. I've actually, in order to fight cravings, I've actually, like, when I was driving on the road, I don't know.

Did I mention this to you? I can't remember anymore. I don't remember what happens anymore in a week. I discovered that instead of getting energy drinks I would drink liquid death Oh yeah And yeah, simply because it looks like an energy drink And when I crack it open and drink from it

It feels like an energy drink Even though it's just water And I've tricked my brain into thinking Like if I'm like, man I need an energy drink I'll just like open one And then immediately the craving will go away. And then I'll stare at it for a little bit and be like, this isn't an energy drink. And then my brain will be like, we could be jazzed up right now, Jesse. Why don't we just go back and go get a delicious monster?

I'm like, no, brain. No. It's like, come on, buddy. You know you want to feel it again like no I Don't need it. No Here's the thing is like when I stopped drinking Soda I was like I'm gonna start drinking like the carbonated Water right cuz it's like healthier

There's no sugar in it But I'm pretty sure that irritated my stomach even more just from the carbonation because I think it's like bigger cans. I'm drinking more of it, and they would just irritate me more Yeah, I don't have that problem. I don't have a stomach I don't my stomach telling me my stomach doesn't tell me to stop my stomachs like we can do more We got room come on keep it coming pal. We got room No, there's no room left in here No, there's no room left in here. My brain says yes.

My stomach says yes. The only thing stopping me is I got pure willpower. I'm like, no. No, Jesse, don't do it. Oh, yeah. No, no. If I let this thing go loose, you'd have to wheel me around town. You'd have to put me in a wheelbarrow and just take me to events.

It would just be you wheeling me around. That'd be it. I'd be done. I couldn't. Oh, yeah. Every day I'm like, but what if we got a Coke today, Jesse? I'm like, no! No, Bray, no. Yep.

That's where I am. Just one. See, this is why I feel like I shouldn't have decided to just not drink soda. And just be like, what if I drink less? But I have to start with none so that less seems like a treat. You know what I mean? Because if I start drinking less, I'll be like, well, I might as well drink more because I'm already doing it. That sucks.

That's stupid. Yeah, this is what I get for enjoying my life for the first half of it. I feel that. I enjoyed my life too much. Yeah, I'm like, oh, man, now I got to care. This is garbage. It's dumb. Very dumb.

That's our review. That's our life review. It's dumb. Very dumb. Speaking of which, I got my shot. Yeah? How'd you do? So I got it on Tuesday.

My second shot, that is, for anyone wondering. I got the Moderna. And, you know, I saw people range from, like, I had nothing to, like, I was dead for a week. And I'm like, okay. So we're going to roll the dice. And knowing my luck, I'm going to roll about a two or a three. Maybe a one. I don't.

If you rolled a one, you would not be here right now. Oh, that's true. So I think I rolled a three. you would not be here right now. Oh, that's true. So I think I rolled a three. I don't think that happened. I think I rolled a solid three. Of 20? No, out of these six. Oh, all right. I was about to say, a three out of 20, you'd still be like, I lost an arm.

Like, at first, I got it, and I felt okay. I was like, all right, you know what? Don't feel too bad. Last time I got the first shot, I had a bit of, like, malaise, where you're kind of like, ugh, I feel weird. But I didn't have that this time. So I was like, all right, maybe we're good. But my arm started to hurt.

So I'm like, all right, that's normal. Everybody gets the old arm hurting. Then I was like, all right, eight hours later, still nothing. I'm like, okay, we're doing good. Then about 11 hours later, I got it at like 3 p.m. It was about 2 a.m., and I stood up to get something to eat or something, and my legs were aching. I was like, I don't think that's from sitting too long.

Then my body was aching. I was like, oh, God. Then I i just started getting tired then the headache kicked in and then i was just full-blown aching you know and uh i didn't have that at all i don't know i guess they're saying that that's actually your immune system like kicking on to like make antibodies so i was like at least that's my body doing something so i just laid there and i was like here we go let's tough it out and then after a little bit i was like i'm taking the tylenol because i looked on the internet and they're like as long as you didn't take it like before you got the shot you know after you got you didn't take tylenol immediately no oh maybe that i mean they said you weren't supposed i don't

know they said afterwards You could take one Like the minute you get home That's even what my The lady who gave me the shot The doctor told me She was like Don't take the one before

But you can take one Once we've administered the shot Oh I thought it was Once you start Once the symptoms start hitting That's when you can take it That's what I thought

No she was like Get in there Take that And like You know Dr. John Will let us know But for real It. That's what I thought. No, she was like, get in there, take that, and like, you know, Dr. John will let us know. But for real, that's what she told me. And so when I was, you know, my mom even was like, take your Tylenol. So shout out to her for this advice.

But I straight up just, I had chills and I had like soreness in my arm for a few days. But other than that, because I took Tylenol, I was just like fine. I had no muscle aches. But I had all the other symptoms that people described, but my muscles didn't hurt. So I was like able to do stuff. It felt fine. Yeah, I just had the aches hit me and then I took a Tylenol and then sat there being like all right here we go and then uh

try it was this that that you got your shot tuesday oh so you're are you're like through it already yeah well like and then that was tuesday night and then but i heard people being like do it last a few days or something so i I'm like, all right, is this going to get worse? Am I going to be dead tomorrow? So I tried to go to sleep, but I would wake up every two hours just kind of feeling achy and I had my headache. And I was like, ugh. And then I just kept falling back asleep. And after about six weird hours of sleep, I woke up and I was like, you know what? I feel like 50% better.

Did you get any weird side effects? No. Damn. I'm trying to figure it out. So when I got my first shot and my second shot, immediately following both, I got pimples. Oh. I'm not

a big pimple getter. I don't usually get pimples, but like immediately, and they were not just like face but they're like all over my body pimples like not a lot but like a random one on my leg like one on my side i'm like where the hell did this come from i don't know if it's stress because of like oh i gotta get this thing done i don't know what it was, but both times it was crazy. I was like, is it my body? Is my body kicking into overdrive and it's like, oh, let's make a –

I don't know. I have no idea what's going on. All I know is that it happened both times. It was crazy. I was like, this has to be a side effect. And then it went away. And now I'm just like, okay. It's so strange i have no

idea why yeah i don't i didn't get any of that i just had the body aches and the headache and then my arm hurt and then the next day i was like screw it i'm taking a tylenol and uh we're kicking in the high gears so i did that and then it just went away, and it never came back, and I was good after that. My arm still hurt, but not bad. And now today, it's still a little sore, but definitely not as bad. So, man, that was really the worst. Yeah, that'll take a few days.

I seem to recall it still hurt maybe like, I don't know, four days later. Not like bad hurt, but it was kind of like sore. And so I just would rub it, and then when I got in the shower just let the hot water just do its thing. I was like, oh yeah. Get in there, heat. I already went back to the gym today. Yeah, you good. You flexing

on all them haters. I know Kristen got her second vaccine because I saw on Twitter. Yes, Kristen would definitely go to Twitter and be like, I'm dying. I saw her say, I think it was like two days ago. It just said, I think she got it the day after me, I think. She was like feeling blessed. Only side effect was body aches.

Today I have a migraine though. And then today she was like feeling a little woozy. Just going to stream something chill. And then she was like, a little woozy uh just gonna stream something chill and then she's like i'm so hungry but so nauseous everything i consume tastes spoiled and gross please let my side effects subside and i was like yeah that sounds sounds terrible um that's what i'm saying some people like you don't get anything and then she's got like days of stuff and i'm just like i made it out of like four hours of that i'm good you don't get anything. And then she's got, like, days of stuff. And I'm just like, ah, made it out of, like, four hours of that. I'm good. I don't know.

You can shoot me for anything. And I'll be like, all right, let's go. That's a quote. Just saying. Like, yeah, okay, I'm down. I'm feeling good. They were like, do you need to sit around? Because once they shot me, they're like, do you need to sit around? Because once they shot me, they're like, do you

need to sit around? Or if you want to stay here for 10, 15 minutes, see if you get woozy or whatever. And I was like, no, I'm good. Just drove back to my apartment. It takes like 30 minutes from where I got my shot. Drove back, got in, and made some tea, and took a Tylenol and was like, all right, I'll just chill out. And that was it. So I don't know. I guess I'm built like a horse. Or your immune system is just very weak. It's like, I ain't reacting to this.

Well, if my immune system is weak, I would be in bad shape right now. That's also true, yeah. Yeah, I feel like maybe all those years of getting... I cannot tell you. Like, you know this. Even before, when I was a teacher, I got sick all the time from those kids. Every few weeks, they'd give me another cold or something else. And then, traveling as much as I did, all the cons I get sick all the time

There's go look back through the records of Cox and Crandor. I was like hello. Welcome. Oh, yeah I feel like my body's just like we got this bro, and I just want to say thanks body. Thanks Wouldn't getting so sick a lot mean you have a weak immune system though um Wouldn't getting sick a lot mean you have a weak immune system though? Um, yes I mean, that's definitely I mean, yes, I would assume that's what that means But it also means that I have I'm like chock full of antibodies

My body's like Bring it on bro, we've been doing this for a long time Let's go So whatever it is, like some new virus Walks into your body, it's like hold on Get the book, and you like start through like, have I seen you before? Yeah, there's just a bouncer. 2001.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, no, you're on the list. Come on in. Then the door's open. There's a bunch of guys in there waiting to beat him up. Like, yeah, yeah, come on in. Yeah, that's how I imagine it is inside In my sort of like Osmosis Jones body

That's what I imagine is going on inside Yeah Oh well look who it is For some reason it's an Irish dude Like a little leprechaun Like oh welcome Come on into the club boy And then they beat him up

Yeah That's what I imagine That's what I imagine That's what I imagine So overall that experience It was alright Glad I got it And now thankfully You can live your best life

By which I mean probably just chill out at home still Honestly everyone always thinks I chill out at home But really I go to the gym Like four or five times a week And then honestly everyone always thinks i like chill out at home but really i i go to the gym like four or five times a week uh and then i usually like go to the bookstore or like you know i like to go in random stores like the container store like i said walk around there i like you go into like um i don't know like local shops and things I know you go into that one shop. Oh, yeah.

Because I bought a thing from that one shop. Yeah, there's like nice little local shops. You go in and it's like a nice little thing. I don't know. I like supporting like local stores and then, you know. So, I mean, that's what I am. I like doing that type of thing. I don't like like, oh, yeah, I'm going to go travel.

I'm going to go clubbing. I'm going to like, you know. I'm not that, but I got me. I'm gonna go clubbing. I'm gonna, like, you know. I'm not that, but I got... Not me. I'm all about clubbing. You know me. I love a good club. Traveling and clubbing. Traveling and clubbing. I'm going to Ibiza. Is Ibiza the place people go? That's where I'm going.

It's the EDM one, I think, in Spain. Yeah, all the EDM guys are like, I went to Ibiza. Yeah, that's where I'm going next. To release my new album album called Beat and Cox. It's a terrible name. It's a terrible name for an album. What type of music you making?

Transcendental House Jams. That's not bad. That's not bad. Thank you. I don't know what it means, but it sounds good. What's your top hit? Hot Jesse Summer. It's a thing your top hit? Hot Jesse Summer. It's a thing.

Hashtag Hot Jesse Summer. All right. It has no drop. It is all build up, and then it ends. There's no drop. It's all build up and hype, and then it just ends. See, if I was a DJ. Yeah?

I'd make either Big Room. That's because I love my Big Room EDM songs. What does that mean? What does Big Room mean? Big Room's got the, like, heavy drops where it's like. And then it's like. It's got, like, the big drop. Because that's, like, when you're lifting, you wait for the drop, and that's when got like the big drop. Because that's like when you're lifting, you wait for the drop, and that's when you lift at the drop.

You lift at the drop. Lift at the drop. And then I also like trance. And what is the difference with trance? How would you compare the two? Basically, I'm trying to figure out what I need to steal to make my new album. It builds up, and then it hits, and then it kind of fades out. While Big Room, it's more of a build-up, drop, build-up, drop, and that's it.

So it's a little more intense. All the trance, it kind of builds up, and then it's like... Then it's got more of the... Give me an example that I would know of these two. I don't think you're going to know. Come on. There's got to be popular examples that I would know. You know Blaster Jacks?

No. All right. Well, he's one of the biggest like big room people. Blaster Jacks. Blaster Jacks? How do you spell Blaster? Oh, J-A-X-? Oh J-A-X-X So basically it's kind of like

The way you would describe The big room is just like Even the audio Quality of the music even Sounds like it is supposed to be Blasted in a stadium setting Yes It has that overwhelming

That kind of over the top. It doesn't sound... There you go. Listen right there. I blinked the time. You're going to hear it building up and then it's going to drop. It's going to drop. This is a song called Legion by Blaster Jacks.

Already, just based on what I'm hearing in this song, it has a... Even the voice in the background sounds like it's broadcasting from, like, 17 rows up. Yeah, but then you hit the drop. And then everyone, basically, you know what it sounds like? It sounds like music that you can imagine thousands of people jumping in unison to. Yeah. I mean, that's what it's made for.

I mean, yeah. That's what it sounds like. Okay, yeah. So that's like, it's great. You can see how you lift to this, right? You're like, you're like pumping weights. I couldn't lift to this. What?

I would be like, I can't. I couldn't. How can you not lift to this? I've told you before. I told you before. I can't do anything to music. Music aggravates me. All right. Okay all all right so trance then is trance would be darude sandstorm that's more like techno edm all right so what's trance you're probably looking more armin van

buren okay actually know who that is okay I know who that is armin van buren. Okay, I actually know who that is. Okay, I know who that is. Armin van Buuren does a podcast called A State of Trance where he every week does trance music. Alright, see I understand that. I get what that is. Look at that. I kinda know things. I feel like I'm not an idiot. There you go. If I just give you that. I just picked a random one and I'm like that is pretty generic trance yeah yeah yeah that's exactly what I would do so yeah the whole like yeah try it and then it usually it's like and then it all like blends together it's like it's good for like cardio that's my cardio music i i feel that that would i would get really sleepy i would like start to close my eyes while i was doing cardio because

i'd be like i'm so bored i'm so and the music because it just blends together it like dulls my senses and i'm just like oh down I go yeah yeah yeah yeah so I mean those are my two my two main things I would do that's what I listen to now I have to not to google friends and dental what did I say trans and trans transcendental Meditative House Funk is what I would Transcendental Meditation House Funk. Is that a thing?

I don't know. To me, house music is always what they play in H&M and all those places. I can't believe there's a song called Freaky Chakra. This is the music I would make. Crendor. This is the music I would make cred door this is the music I would make oh my god this song is incredibly silly oh my god this definitely is something something this is the music i would make transcendental funk this song is perfect this is this is what i would make wow that really i don't know that's perfect that's a perfect jesse I'm so pleased with it.

Like, I can't even, like, that's great. That's so good. That song is perfect. Oh, man, that's so funny. All right. Well, that's, you know, now I've learned a little bit about myself. Okay. So, way off topic from this,

I have an update on a story that is of great importance to us. All right. So, as you know, I mentioned a while ago that there was, like, a dude who would go on a balcony across from me

and stare out into nothingness and make weird hand signals. So, the update is that not only is he still doing it at the exact same time every day, but the other day, I came up to make lunch, and I was sitting there looking out the window, kind of like making a sandwich, you know, just making the sandwich, putting the bread and the cheese, and, you know, all the sandwich things. And I'm watching him through the window, like, sitting there with a can of something, drinking some drink. And, like, pointing to the, you know, the nothingness.

Just, like, pointing off the balcony, making hand signals like he's on third base. And he's doing all the different, like, you know, things. And I look up, see him do this, look down. I'm making my food, look up, take a bite of my sandwich. And as I do, he is staring directly at me, looking directly at me. And I want to let you know, it was right then I was like, well, this is it. This is how I die. He's going to show up in my apartment, and he's going to be like,

I need to have a talk with you. My employer wants... Oh, I was ready for it. And he looks at me and then he like waves. Like the goofiest wave I've ever seen. Like the like howdy neighbor wave just does this wave. And I like

kinda wave back and he turns back to the edge of the balcony And starts making hand signals again And I was like Am I good? Do they hear the podcast? Are they like chill?

Is this clearly this cartel activity? Are they chill? I hope so But he's like yeah he just waved I was like oh Okay And then I just went about my business and uh yeah i guess we're good thing is i haven't looked like i haven't you know for reasons i don't know what

kind of reasons but for reasons i haven't really looked out that window in a few days so i wouldn't you know i don't know who knows if he's out there anymore but But yeah, so I'd like to say on behalf of me to this secret cartel of drug runners that it's probably what it is. Hey, keep doing what you're doing. I, for one, don't care. I hope you have a great day. Good luck, guys.

Good luck, fellas. Wowee. Yep, that's where I'm at. I was like, no, not today. Not today. It's not worth it. Honestly, just board up your window. Honestly, you should go into hiding.

Witness protection program. Are you still ruling out the green cheetah Cause I am You think that is the green cheetah I still think it is I'm still convinced This is a green cheetah free zone

So if that's the green cheetah across from me Masquerading as like a middle aged man In a hoodie Pointing out to nothing To like the apartments across the way. I'm telling you, either there's someone across the way communicating with them, which again, that's also very weird,

or I don't know what they're doing. I can't figure out what this guy's doing. Maybe he's practicing because he is a third-base coach and I just don't understand. Could it be that simple that he's just a third-base coach and he's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm just, you know, I'm in the majors and I got to practice. And he does it on his balcony.

It could be that simple. I mean, I never thought of that. He could also do that in his house and not on the balcony. Maybe that's his alone time. Maybe that's like his, you know, we're in apartments. They're not huge apartments. Maybe he like, you know, I got the wife and kid in there. I got to focus.

Sometimes I like to go outside and smoke and put the ashes in my can of monster energy drink. On the bright side, he hasn't killed you yet. That is the bright side. On a positive note, I'm still alive, so that's good. Yeah. Yeah. On a positive note, I'm still alive, so that's good. Yeah. Yeah. On a positive note, I haven't been murdered. Yeah.

Things are looking up. 2021's looking up. There you go. Well, speaking of looking up. Beautiful. Your future could be looking up when you start to think about learning a second language. That's a stretch, but it really is true. It really is true.

Bilingual people are killing it right now. And it's needed in careers around the world as we come together. One big little beautiful marble in space. For most of us, learning a second language in high school or college wasn't exactly the high point of our academic careers. If I'm honest, I am great at Spanglish, and I remember, you know, I can read Spanish.

I cannot speak it to save my life. Now, thanks to Babbel, the number one selling language learning app, there's an addictively fun and easy way to learn a new language. Whether it's because you'll be traveling abroad, or you want to connect in a deeper way to family or friends, or you just have free time Babbel teaches you bite-sized language lessons That you actually use in the real world I right now, like I said

I kill it with Spanglish I'm tired of just being that So I'm taking Spanish right now And I want to get my Spanish back So I'm like diving in deep It was like, where do you want to start? And I was like, hit me with that intermediate. Let's do this thing.

So I am in it. I am doing lessons. You can do lessons for like 15 minutes a day. It's really straightforward. And it gives you sort of like a tracker to see where you're at. And they're practical. They have real world conversations in mind. Things that you will use in everyday life.

And the AI works great because it actually understands what the hell you're saying. And it was created by 100 language experts to help you. Their teaching method is scientifically proven to be effective. And that's why I'm trying to use it. They can do anything from Spanish to French to Italian to German, all these different things, 14 different languages. Plus, its speech recognition technology helps you to improve your pronunciation

and accent. Join me and so many others right now and get on your language journey to Babbel. You can get 3 months free if you buy a 3 month subscription from Babbel.

That's 6 months total for the price of three. Just go to Babbel.com, B-A-B-B-E-L.com, and use promo code COX for an extra three months free. That's B-A-B-B-E-L.com, promo code COX, three extra months free. Babbel, it's language for life. Also today we're brought to you by Calm The seasons are changing

Warmer temperatures especially at night Oh man night is when I have like I'll lay in bed for a good hour When it's hot out cause I just can't get to sleep The blooming flowers Are messing with my allergies Daylight savings is messing with my brain As we spring forward

You may feel like you're starting to lose some sleep. You're falling behind. This year, this weather change, it's time to start using Calm. Calm is the number one mental wellness app to give you the tools that improve the way you feel. Clear your head with guided daily meditations, improve your focus with Calm's curated music tracks, and drift off to dreamland with Calm's imaginative sleep stories. Go to calm.com slash Cox and you'll get a limited time offer for 40% off a Calm premium subscription, which includes

hundreds of hours of programming and new content added every week. I always use the daily meditation. I am in it. I use it every single day. It gets me going. Over 1 million people around the world use Calm to take care of their minds. All you got to do is go to calm, C-A-L-M dot com slash Cox. Get 40% off a Calm premium subscription. That's C-A-L-M dot C-O-M slash Cox. 40% off for its entire library. Sleep more. Stress less. Live better with Calm.

All right, Crandor. Let's go to chapter number seven. This is Guy with the Crandor. How's that traffic out there? Oh, boy. Traffic today is brought to you by Willy's Wonderland, which is the Nick Cage movie that's on sale to be rented for only $3 this weekend. So we should probably watch it. When are we watching this shit?

When are we watching it? I feel like we should watch it Saturday. Are we going to watch it during the day? Is it going to be our daytime watch? I don't know. We should watch it in the day? Is it gonna be our daytime watch? I don't know, we should watch it in the evening. Okay. That way I can drink wine and not feel as bad.

Alright, sounds good. Yeah. There's cars out there back there. Alright! Let's go to, I was about to say, Choptercopter. Let's not do that, we were just there. Let's go to weather Nope I'm too late now Weather Here we are at the weather desk

Let's see I'll take a weather recommendation From last week we had Let's see. Somebody show title. Also, a lot of people are like, Crandor, Brandon Sanderson has a writing series. I know. I've seen it. I've watched it twice. It's very good. It's all free on YouTube.

You should do weather report of Rødover, Denmark. Rødover, Denmark. Rødover, Denmark. Let's see. Rødover, capital region, Denmark, Denmark. Where is Rødover? It's to the east. Along the lake. Or the ocean. The old ocean lake. It's to the east. Along the lake.

Or the ocean. The old ocean lake. It's along water. Let's see here. Oh, yeah, there it is. Okay. In Rodover, Denmark. Currently 39 degrees Fahrenheit.

Clear 3% chance precipitation through 5 a.m. Why is this the voice you've chosen? I decided to use this voice because it's like the least Denmark voice I could think of. Yeah, no, that's what I was curious. High 54, low 45, humidity 94%, pressure 29.88 inches. Visibility could be 10 miles coming in. You can't see out of that. You squint your eyes, you might be able to see 11 miles if you try real hard.

Wind 7 miles an hour east. 2.37 UV index. 010 moon phase. Waning crescent. That's waning crescent right there. 10 day. Yeah, your Sunday. Wait, Saturday.

What day? 54, partly cloudy, high 54, winds 10, 15 miles an hour. Sunday, you got 66, mostly cloudy. Monday, 68. Tuesday, you got 60 with rain, and then from there on out, boy, it's going to rain every day. Yeehaw. Wednesday, 60 rain. Thursday, 59 rain.

Friday, 61 rain. Saturday, 58 rain. What's that in the old Celsius? 60 F2C. That's about 15.5 on the Celsius scale. America didn't teach me that. That's the weather.

Can I suggest to you to look up... So I guess Redover is just outside Copenhagen? I guess? I don't quite know. I don't know where Copenhagen is. Well, I guess that's your homework. There's a place called the Redover

Redover I don't know how you would say that Sky Village And I want to live there It looks like Just google this place It looks like the craziest building ever built by anyone It's lopsided

It's totally weird and it's all I guess apartments Oh whoa hotel offices residential i would live there in a heartbeat it looks like a weird ass looking place something someone would make in like a one of those cube games like minecraft games or something it looks like like a terrible minecraft build but i love it. It is pretty cool. Yes, I love everything about it. And it's got like little tree plots

on top of the buildings. Yeah, it looks way... And then also the area that it's in right now. If you look at the map, it doesn't look like it belongs there at all. I wonder if this is really controversial for the area. Because everything there seems to be like small, like one-story houses.

And they're like, build our mega structure. I dig it. I would love to have a place like this. Yeah, it's honestly pretty cool. I would be so happy to be like, yes, I live in the creepy building. That definitely is used to summon Cthulhu. I would be so happy to be like, yes, I live in the creepy building that definitely is used to summon Cthulhu. I live there. It's so crazy looking.

I'm looking at the look of it. The bottom floor is smaller than the middle. It looks like someone made a really crappy deflated football. I love it. I love this building. It really does, actually. It looks like someone made, like, a really crappy deflated football. I love it. I love this building. It really does, actually.

It looks so confused. Like, it just doesn't know what it is, and I love it. Oh, man. I love, like... See, that's the thing. People are like, it's an architectural blunder. I hate it. Good, I'm moving in.

I'll move into the place that you're like, I would never live there. That's like when they made that one building. I don't remember what it was, but in the UK and London, they made a building and everyone's like, it's an eyesore on the skyline. I'd be like, I'll move there. That place is brand new. It looks amazing. It's so weird looking.

I would love to live there. Oh, yeah. I'd have a great time. Oh, yeah. I'd have a great time. Although all my neighbors would be like, quiet down in there, YouTuber. Keep your voice down, dude. And I'll be like, oh, man.

Guys. Come on. That's the weather. All right. Okay. Let's go to sports. Sports. Okay, let's go to sports. Sports. Sports, sports, sports.

We got some sports stuff. Getting close to the NBA and NHL playoffs. Only a couple games left in, I think, both leagues. So, currently, you got Philadelphia, Milwaukee, and the Nets up top. You got Philadelphia, Milwaukee, and the Nets up top of the East. You got the Knicks, the Hawks, the Heat, the Celtics, the Hornets, the Pacers, and the Wizards would all be in the playoff battle. Over in the West, you got the Jazz Suns, Clippers, Nuggets, and then the Mavericks, Lakers, Trailblazers, Warriors, Grizzlies, and Spurs. Then in hockey, hockey, you would have the Carolina Hurricane,

Tampa Bay Lightning, and Florida Panthers, and I believe the Nashville Predators. I was about to say, did you just name all Florida teams, but then you mentioned Nashville. Yeah, Nashville's also there. Then in the West, you got Vegas, Minnesota, Colorado, and probably St. Louis. teams but then you mentioned nashville yeah nashville's also there uh then the west you

got vegas minnesota colorado and probably st louis and in the east you got pittsburgh washington boston and the new york islanders and in the old canadian north you got toronto edmonton winnipeg and probably montreal and those will be the playoff teams for hockey. Over in baseball, we at least have some games under the playoff. There's no playoffs in baseball yet. I was about to say, what are you talking about? Under the regular season. You got the Red Sox in first, Tampa Bay close behind. You got Cleveland top of the central.

The White Sox and the Kansas City Royals close behind. You got the Oakland A's at the top with Seattle and Houston close behind. You got Philadelphia first in the East with the Mets and pretty much everybody else close behind. And you got St. Louis top Central. You got Milwaukee and the Cubs close behind. And then you got the Giants top the West with San Diego and the Dodgers close behind. And that's the baseball, and that's the sports. All right.

What is our – oh, I'm not going to forget. What is our stupid fact that I guess is important of the day? You did it. You're growing. Took a while, but I got it. Alright, our big fact of the day. Here we go.

Oh wait, we've done that one. I always just kind of flip through. Alright, here we go. The world's smallest reptile was first reported in 2021. What? This is brand new? I guess so.

Those who think everything on the planet has already been discovered might just have not looked close enough. A tiny chameleon discovered in northern Madagascar and measuring just 28.9 millimeters is believed to be the smallest reptile on the earth the itty-bitty chameleon was recently discovered and reported in the January yours millimeters tiny hey look at a picture Wow he is such a cutie look at that it's literally like a big chameleon got shrunk down or something. Shrink rays, of course. The old shrink rays. First discovered in January

2021 issue of Scientific Reports, there's one thing about these critters that's big for its size. The genitalia of the male measures almost 20% of its body length. Oh, yeah. Okay. That's a

little big chameleon. Yep. No one calls him little anymore. Look at that. And if you just keep looking, you'll find some crazier shit. Earth. Yeah.

I'm sure we'll talk about it. There's your fact of the day. All right. What's our big news story of the day? Big news story of the day. Let's see. What's this? Your mom. Wait, what is this your mom wait what is this your mom won't

frown at these weird Mother's Day gifts I don't know about that I gotta see what these are I was like what are you about to say when you started a news article with your mom I was like what are you about to say your mom

your mom, I was like, what you about to say, good lord. Your mom. Your mom. These gifts suck. Of course they do. Toilet paper earrings. Apologetic mother's day cookie. Sucks. Spicy cicada seasoning. Sucks.

Why would you give your mom cicadas? Do you love your mother? Why would you give her cicadas yeah i don't that is weird the happy the shit no a device that sends electromagnetic waves to calm her down to go nothing says happy mother's day like you need to calm down mom you need to calm down, Mom. You need to calm down, Mom. Put this on. That's offensive as shit. Here you go, honey. I got this so you can calm the fuck down. You think I'm mad?

You don't think I'm calm? You need to calm down. The Golden Girls Porno Coloring Book. No. Champagne. Why would you? I don't know. Champagne Bottle Bong. No. Champagne Bottle Bong? no champagne i don't know champagne bottle bong no champagne bottle bong you're gonna get your mama champagne bottle bong no i know what's doing that if you're getting your mama champagne bottle

bong you've got an interesting relationship with your mother one i will never understand yeah bicycle pizza cutter no that, that's dumb. A frowny face doll. Why would you get that for your mom for Mother's Day? I don't know. Alcoholic whipped cream? Alcoholic whipped cream?

I mean, I might get that for myself, but why would I get that for my mom? Yeah, I don't know. And the rest of these also suck ass. I'm sure they do. I'm positive they do. Yeah. Let's see. There's got to be something about it.

Oh, here we go. We've got... All right, we've got... Oh, get out Alright, we've got, uh... Oh, get out of here, dumb gifs. Okay, there we go. We've got... Woman's home trashed by flock of giant California condors. And we've got...

What? What? I said okay. And we've got japanese town decides giant squid statue is best use of covid relief funds i mean i agree with the second story let's see i'll read them both second story is a quick one it sounds fishy but a japanese town has decided the best way to spend the relief funds are on a giant squid statue. Noto, which is located on the west coast of Honshu, is known for its squid fishing, so town leaders decided a huge statue of the tasty cephalopod could cook up interest from tourists. But Squid Station wasn't cheap the 13 foot high

29 foot long statue cost around two hundred thousand dollars some locals think the funds should have been used for actual coronavirus relief probably they're right i mean they're right idiots yes one unnamed resident said the money should have been spent on medical staff or for long-term care facilities which urgently requires support because of the pandemic ctv notes that japan has recorded 10,000 499 covid related deaths 617,000 cases uh yeah but here's the thing it's a big squid now that squid good will be there forever yeah long after mankind has left this earth a giant squid will remain it'll make a great

home for like birds maybe like yeah beavers or like a squirrel yeah whatever comes after us will honor that squid statue and I feel like it was worth it yeah there you go. All right. The condors. Giant California condors are rare, but not at Cinda Mickles' home. About 15 to 20 giant endangered birds have recently taken a liking to the house in the city of Tehekapi

and have made quite a mess. Mickles' daughter, Sean Quintero, or no, Sienna Quintero, I was like, would I say that? Of San Francisco began posting photos of the rowdy guests on Twitter. She told the San Francisco Chronicle the birds showed up at her mother's home sometime last weekend. The birds have trashed the deck, a spa cover decorative flags lawn ornaments plants have been knocked over railing scratch and there's poop everywhere she's definitely frustrated but also in awe of this and knows what an unusual experience this is quintero said of her mother

the u.s fish and wildlife service which runs program safe species from extinction responded on twitter the agency noted the house the house is in historic condor habitat and suggested that the Mickels try harmless hazing, like shouting and clapping or spraying water. California condors almost vanished in the 1980s before the few remaining birds were captured, placed in zoos for captive breeding. A few hundred birds are now in the wild.

I like how they're like... So they just like rolled up, got into her backyard and then went nuts! Yeah. But because they're like... Oh my god, these pictures are terrifying.

Imagine being like an old lady and just like a giant. What are you going to do? You just look out the window. They're like, this is our town, old woman. What's crazy is they're like there's only 160 of these birds left flying in California. Yeah. And so they all, like you can't shoot them.

You know what's even more wacky? In the photos, they all have numbers. So these are condors that were being tracked. Oh, yeah, they do. So this is like the government was like, look, let him have free reign. We can't stop him, lady. You're just in the way. Wow, that's crazy. Like, they come, they're like, listen, I mean, you can spray in the way. Wow, that's crazy.

I like how they come. They're like, listen, I mean, you can spray him with water or something. Like, won't they attack me? It's like, yeah, but you can try. They'll most likely kill you. But if you don't want them to, like, destroy your entire balcony, everything is destroyed. They knocked over plants. They were just like, hey, is this your pot of plant?

Not anymore You're in condor habitat now They destroyed Her air conditioner is ripped up Wow They like have bricks ripped out of stuff How do they rip out bricks These guys are dicks

These guys They're over here just like, no, they're in danger. Yeah, well, they're in danger now because this lady's pissed off. She ever sees them again, she's going to be like, I bought a shotgun this time, haters. It's like, listen, either you spray the water, you clap, or just sell the place to the condors. They're looking. They're in the market yes it's a great seller's market right now you should try yeah you might as well jump in there get it while you can that's another picture it's like wow they're negotiating like in the bedroom with like a bunch of contracts all over yeah but everything in the bedroom is on the floor

and they're like crapping everywhere. Negotiations are going well. Yeah. I managed to get it for 14 pounds of birdseed. That's crazy. Yeah, I can't believe they had it on them

I asked for money, but all they had was bird seed And they threatened me So I took it If I didn't take it They'd kill me and my family I didn't know if they were serious I don't even like my family all that much But the bird seed was too much of a deal to pass up

And then she flies away for the winter And then she's like bye everybody And she was the condor All along Yeah I tricked him I was the condor all along That would be a plot twist If at the end it was like my grandmother a condor

Who's lived in this home for years These other squatter condor came over Rude Well that's that story Alright well there we go Two great stories That's it for us thank you so much for listening And watching or however you're enjoying this podcast

Crendor hit em with the socials. Socials. You should follow the podcast on YouTube.com slash Cox and Crendor podcast. All one word. And subscribe, like, comment, all that stuff. Also, cut off the podcast part. Go to YouTube.com slash Cox and Crendor. And there's all the fun animations.

There's a new animation coming out this weekend. So you should do that. It's happening. Probably by the time you hear this. It might come out at the exact same time as this podcast. Mamma mia. So yeah, go watch that. And then follow us on other stuff. Spotify, iTunes,

SoundCloud. Type Cox and Crandor in. You'll probably find it. Also, follow us on our main stuff. We got YouTube.com slash Jesse Cox, YouTube. Cox and Crendor in. You'll probably find it. Also, follow us on our main stuff. We got YouTube.com slash Jesse Cox. YouTube.com slash Crendor. Twitter.com slash Jesse Cox. Twitter.com slash Crendor. Facebook. Jesse Cox. Facebook. Crendor. Instagram. Notorious Cox. Instagram. Crendor is taken. YouTube. Warhammer. Crendor. If you like Warhammer and probably something else in there. I don't know. Just type our names in.

Alright. Well, also, hey. Give a shout out if you were looking for another podcast to listen to. This past episode of Chaluminati, Krendor was our guest. Oh yeah, that's right. It was a wild adventure. You should definitely tune in.

Just look up ChaluminatiPod on the internet. You will listen to our weird, if you like strange paranormal stuff or you just want to hear Crandor derail a podcast. This is it. This is the one for you. That is there too. It was very fun.

Alright, that's it for us. Thanks so much. See you all next time. And as always, to be continued.