Cox n' Crendor Show - Episode 311 - The New King of Shorts

Episode Date: October 18, 2021

Come to our live show in Chicago Dec 12th! For more info check coxandcrendor.com! The boys are back and this time Crendor's lack of sleep has given Jesse this rare opportunity to trick him into doing youtube shorts! May the new king of 30 second content reign forever!!! Also a drunk man with swords sets fire to a road in Florida. All this and more on a brand new Cox n' Crendor! Go to http://babbel.com and use promo code COX to get 6 months for the price of 3! Go to http://hellofresh.com/cox14 and use code cox14 for up to 14 free meals, including free shipping!

Hey there everyone, just a reminder, we've got a live show coming up this December in Chicago. We'd love to see you there. If you want more information, please go to coxandkrendor.com. Today's episode is brought to you by HelloFresh. HelloFresh is here to give you them fresh meals, to live it right to your home. Also today, we're brought to you by Babbel. Babbel is the way to learn a new language In fact it's the number one Best selling way We'll talk about that when we get into this podcast Let's jump into the show Hello everybody

It's time for Cosa Trendog This is Trendog In the morning In the morning Broadcasting live Live live live live In 4 hour recording studio Recording Hello everybody and welcome to another episode of Cacks and Crandall in the morning. Uh, oh my god.

What, what, what, what? That was like you were like Oh boy here we go Don't want to be asking Oh my god Yeah well yesterday Alright I could not sleep So I only slept like four hours I am the reverse

What happened to you Yesterday The next door neighbors or maybe i don't know someone in my apartment complex was like at 8 p.m throwing a raging kegger it was like blasting not good music it sounded like the exact same beat for about two hours it was like and i was like how is this one song when does this end but i noticed that if i went into my bedroom i didn't hear it at all so i went to my bedroom because there's nothing in my bedroom i'm gonna say 9 p.m fell asleep and then i woke up around 10 a.m today so i slept a long time jesus how long how long do you normally sleep during the six seven hours okay it's not too bad Yeah I just like I was

You know I just Was like eff it Go into bed And so then I went to bed I woke up and I looked at the Well what happened truthfully Is I woke up Looked at the clock

And said it was 6am And I was like I'm not waking up 6am on a Sunday So I went back to bed And then woke up at 10 Huh Now I would have got a headache from that no man although i will say i did get i think i slept right with like my hand on my nose because

i got a zit directly on my nose overnight and i'm not sure how that happened but it was like i woke up and it was like rudolph the red-nosed reindeer looking at me and and I was like, oh, come on. I'm not a big zit-getter, but when I do, I'm like, oh, what am I, 13? This is BS. Well, on my side, I think I had coffee too late. Now, when did you have coffee, old man?

What time did you... I normally go to bed at 5 a.m. Well, there's your problem. But here's the thing. Every time I... I'm consistent with my 5 a.m well there's your problem but here's the thing every time i i'm consistent with my 5 a.m bedtime all right like i have my routine we get ready for bed we go to bed i fall asleep in like 5 10 minutes like rarely do i have sleep problems now after developing my bedtime routine right but when do you think that's gonna change do you think that like there's gonna be a moment where you're not doing that anymore?

I mean, probably. What if Toast gets involved in things? Things? I don't know. She's young now, but eventually she's going to be like, old lady. And old ladies get involved in old lady things. You know what I mean.

Like clubs and book things. Old lady things. You know what I mean. There's things. Yeah, like knitting clothes. You know, like clubs and, like, yeah, like book things and old lady things. You know what I mean. There's no way this can keep up forever. At some point, you're going to have to re-ingratiate into society. There will probably be a point where, like, I feel like the older you get, the easier it is to get up early. Right? Now, I just, here's the thing right like i go to bed we wake up like normally like 5 a.m and then get up at like you know 1 p.m ish so i was like all right we got to get up early

because it was my aunt's birthday so i was like all right they want to meet somewhere to eat at like two o'clock so i have to get up at like well i had to get up at noon because the packer game was on so i'm like i can't even sleep that much i gotta listen to the packer game today so i was like all right here we go and then i laid there and then i laid there and then i just couldn't fall asleep and i was like why can't i fall asleep but i was yawning like i was tired and then i was like i should get up because getting up and moving around that's like the smart thing to do, right? If you can't fall asleep after like, you know, 45 minutes to an hour, just get up, do something and go back to sleep.

And I was like, no, I'm going to fall asleep soon. And then I laid there. Then I laid there. And then I kept, I was like, what time is it? And then it was like seven. And then it was like eight. And then it was like nine. And I was like, all right, we're hitting like, we're hitting points where i'm like i don't know what's gonna happen but

i was like i'm just gonna i'm gonna try to go sleep one more time and then i fell asleep at like 9 30 so i got my four hours of sleep because i woke up at 1 30 sounds terrible so i wanted to i wanted to get up at uh noon to watch the Packer game, and I hit the point where I was like, I don't give a shit anymore. I'm just sleeping. So I slept instead. But here's the thing, okay? The only difference in terms of scheduling was I had coffee,

like a Starbucks Pike Place roast. I haven't had Starbucks regular coffee in months. So I was like, hey, you know what? Go to Starbucks. It was like 10, 10, 10.30 at night. And so I was drinking my Starbucks. I probably drank. Here's the thing, okay?

They give you a tall. And you assume a tall is like one cup of coffee. It's legit like two cups of coffee. So like I drank two cups of coffee so like i drank two-thirds of it and i think that was like two cups of coffee that late at night and usually caffeine is in your system for like it's in there for a while so you don't want to drink it too late and i think that just interrupted my sleep cycles whatever chemicals i guess i mean i i i'm sure a lot of people will give you crap for drinking coffee at 10 30 at night but here's the thing i've done it before i'm not gonna

hate you for it sometimes you're like you know what i can use a coffee i get it i understand well normally if i make it at home i'll be like oh you know i'll do like a little 10 p.m coffee but i have like my little eeyore cup and i fill it like halfway. So I have like a fraction of a cup of coffee at that late. So I think it just gets out of my system faster. This one, the Starbucks cup tricks you. It tricks you and it's how, let's see, how many cups of coffee in a tall Starbucks? In a tall Starbucks. The size of a Starbucks tall is 12 fluid ounces, which is 1.44 cups of coffee. I was going to say most cups of coffee are eight ounces, I would think.

Yeah, so it is more than a cup of coffee. I guess my question for you is how did you decide to drink that coffee? Why did you choose to get a coffee? Like, why did you choose to get a coffee? Were you tired at 1030? No, not really. You just wanted a coffee at 10? You were like, you know what? I want a coffee.

Yeah. I mean, all right. I'm trying to help. I felt like maybe you were tired or maybe I don't know. Well, we did go to the the like chicago comic-con thing so like chicago it was like after that so we were driving back and i was like you know what you know we just walked around this comic-con thing i'll have a coffee yeah tell whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa you buried the lead here with coffee talk when we should be discussing this Comic-Con.

What was this? Why were you there? So this is like the small version of Comic-Con, right? It's like Wizard World or whatever they call it. Wizard World. Okay. So it's like Chicago Wizard World world it's like a comic-con but on a smaller scale to make me look this up wizard world wizard world sounds like a lame

amusement park welcome to wizard world wizard world chicago that's a thing looking at it right now so it's uh i mean it's it's everything you would think of a comic-con but take out anything crazy it's mainly packed were people in masks what was the funny and there's like cosplay people but like we've gone in the past and usually we've like brought friends with like we went with gmart one year uh we went with our friend tina one year we've like brought people you know you just like it's like a comic con it's like oh look there's the bag with the you know a wizard i don't know like there's a there's a bag with like a comic book guy i like iron man or like there's a bunch of people selling comic books or like they got panels and stuff so they have panels of dudes just like that draw comics talking about uh like comic book stuff

how they got in the drawing like all that and then they have like cosplay people said like a cosplay show what's it called like a cosplay uh costume contest i guess is what it was which i need to talk about remind me i mean okay i'm reminding you right now okay but i mean that's the main thing normally it's like four days but it obviously didn't happen last year and then this year i was like i mean if we go i only want to go one day because i don't think there's enough to even see for that many days so uh we went there for we literally went for like two hours and just walked around. How far away is it from you? It's like by the airport.

So, I mean, it's not too bad. Right by the airport. Like all good conventions right by the airport. Yeah. So, I mean, it's I don't know, like it's a fun little like thing to do on a weekend I guess and like everybody had masks on and honestly we went at the end of the day so it was like there's like not that many people there to be honest like it was it was pretty nice either way it was a fun thing to do but then the costume contest all right so the this guy hosting the cosplay costume contest we like, I guess this is one of the only things going on.

May as well see it. He was like, well, I would not say he was a not very good host. So like you'd have these people come up in their costumes and the one person came up and he's like, oh, who are you? And they're like, oh, I'm from this show. And he's like, oh, that's the only good thing to come out of this show was your costume. Wow. It was like, what? The poor kid is like, it's my favorite show. That's like being like, hey, I cosplayed as like, you know, Iron Man.

Like, man, those movies suck. But, you know, that's a good costume you got. I'm not really a fan of uh marvel but like great costume and so we were like all right that's kind of weird and then someone else came up and he like used the one guy like used one of their props is like a thing he's like whoa like the this prop was like hit me and like he like took her prop i was like why are you like taking someone else's stuff? So that was weird and then He like some people he'd like interview and be like yo, that's a cool costume How's this thing why it's crazy and then someone else would come up and he's like here's their costume

Okay, next person like you wouldn't even like Like you would give some people more time than others. I was like this dude's not probably who is flirting with let's be real Knowing comic-con that guy was definitely flirting. He's like, all right, moving on. Yeah, so it was weird. But, you know, I love seeing that stuff when I go to these things. Who was this person? Who was the...

I don't know. It was just some random dude. Oh, yeah, and the one costume, he was like, oh, it looks like this thing broke on your costume. That kind of sucks. Like he's just pointing out their flaws. Like, oh man, this part of your costume is kind of shitty. It's like, oh, okay.

It's like, you got this guy. Maybe they really wanted that guy. Like they really wanted the goof guy. Like, hey, yes, the goof guy. They really wanted that guy. Like, they really wanted the goof guy. Like, hey, yes, the goof guy. I guess he was.

The thing was, he was also at one of the panels we went to, which was, like, the only other panel we went to, which was, like, these two comic book dudes just talking about how they draw stuff. And he's actually pretty good at that. He was one of the dudes? No, he was just, like, asking him questions. Like, oh, how'd you get into it? Like, why do you draw? And I'm like, all right, you know, whatever. But then actually hosting a, like, like costume event he was terrible at it so that that was the thing that happened and then you know just there's a bunch of like photo ops with like comic book like celebrity or like

tv show celebrities and stuff and then everyone was waiting for that i don't i see i see that online you can buy the signed stuff from celebrities i assume who are there and you can just buy it online uh i remember one year we went we saw stan lee there i would here's the thing i would have gone to see william shatner to ask him be like dude real talk tell me about space. You've been there now. You had like a minor freak out about how beautiful it was. Talk to me about space. He could have gone for 20 minutes. I would have got plenty of time with that man and it would have been great.

Blow my mind about spacecraft. You missed your chains. Yeah, I miss a lot of things in life. Yeah, it'd be like that so it was you know it was alright

it's definitely not like any of the big comic con conventions or anything it was just like a average sized decent convention nothing's as big a mess as San Diego Comic Con I do not like going there but there's other conventions that are Nothing is as big a mess as San Diego Comic Con. That place is...

I do not like going there. But there's other conventions that are much, much smaller than this. Well, I guess this one actually moves all around, too. Like, they have it in... Where do they have... Like, they go all over the place. Oh, that... Yeah, you know what?

That probably explains why they can... Because they have Chicago, and I'm seeing on here there's all these other locations. Yeah, it probably explains why they're able to get the celebrities they're able to get because they can lock them in for many different shows and promise them payouts and stuff. Gotcha. Okay. I still don't like the name Wizard World, but I respect it.

It's got Detroit. They got Minnesota. They got Indianapolis. They got, like, Minnesota. They got Indianapolis. They got Maryland, New Mexico. Like, they go all over. Yeah, I bet if you get on the circuit. Yeah, like, they'll get, like, some mainstream celebrities for stuff. Then they'll be like, here's, like, some guy from Buffy the Vampire Slayer

who is her brother. Like, they get, like, those types of people. And here's the thing. We sit they get, like, those types of people. And you, and here's the thing. We sit here and are like, who would, but here's the thing. There's tons of people. Oh, yeah. Every time. But I will say.

If you like Power Rangers and you're like, dude, there's going to be a Power Ranger guy there. Like, you know, go see him. I will say YouTubers have upset the balance. I have been to numerous conventions where there are celebrities who are like, I charge $20 for an autograph, and you guys are over there giving away for free. And that's rude as hell. So there's been times I've been to conventions where they had to put us in a different area

so people wouldn't assume everyone else was free because they were like, yeah, we'll sign it. We don't care. wouldn't assume everyone else was free because they're like yeah we'll sign it we don't care and or uh like there's definitely times where uh you'll see lines of youtubers and the person next to them is like a famous celebrity but like no one's there for their autograph yeah it's certainly it's interesting to see how the ecosystem of conventions has changed yeah it actually is pretty crazy now that i think about it so that that happened, and then I went and got my coffee. All right.

All right, yeah. But I get that. I get coming back from a thing and being like, you know what? I got stuff to do. I could use the brain energy. I get it. I was looking up, like, how long does caffeine stay in your body? And it says, this is according to the cleveland clinic the level of caffeine in your blood peaks at about one hour and stays at this level for several hours for most people six hours after caffeine is consumed half of it is still in your body it

takes up to 10 hours to completely clear caffeine from your bloodstream so it's actually in your system a while it explains why I can Have a bunch of caffeine one day Wake up the next day Not have caffeine Be fine But then around like 3pm I develop the worst headache

And it's like You didn't drink coffee today I'm like that's right I didn't drink I just only had water Oh what a fool And then I'm like And then I go to coffee

And I'm fine And then I'm like and then i go to coffee and i'm fine then i'm fine yeah no it's so it was just it was a bad bad time for sleep that's what it was i mean i feel like you should have planned but that's just me like oh i got stuff to do sunday maybe i should no you were like nah I'll be fine Well I also like I've mentioned in previous podcasts I start the anxiety starts kicking in Cause then you're like I gotta get up

What if I don't sleep What if I don't sleep at all What if I have to go get up and do stuff And I'm tired I can't sleep This is gonna be the worst Then your brain starts racing Your heart starts pounding Then you're not gonna fall asleep cause you're too anxious

I mean look you're not wrong about anxiety doing that, but also, if you had planned, you wouldn't have the anxiety. Well, yeah. If I could go back in my time machine, I probably wouldn't drink the coffee, all right? That's all I'm saying. You know, just put it out there. So the lesson learned is don't drink

caffeine late. Then there's still people who are like, I drink caffeine late and go to sleep. Well, good for you. Alright? I mean, yeah, I didn't want to say nothing, but that's me. So, I don't want to say nothing to pee on your parade or nothing, but, you know. This is my parade and I don't want any pee on it.

It's my parade, and I will have no pee, thank you. So, how's your week go? Lovely. Lovely. Just been going through and making stuff happen at the office, being a boss. You know how it be. Discovered that I might need. So, like, I've been trying to do shorts.

Do you know what YouTube shorts are? YouTube shorts. Yeah, and so they're basically just TikTok on YouTube, really. It is, yeah. And I've been working with my YouTube guy, and he's like, let's try this thing. You got a whole other channel. Let's, like, just see what happens. And so I've been working with my YouTube guy And he's like let's try this thing You got a whole other channel Let's like just see what happens And so I've been trying to make shorts

And I've discovered that some shorts are hits Some shorts are misses And you know there's no in between Either no one watches it Or it is pushed to everyone I'm curious so like do you have a whole new channel For YouTube shorts then? No I have Cox Clips Which is where I'm just dumping all of my Twitch stuff, right?

Cox Clips. Yeah. So, rather than go and, you know, mess around with my normal channel and upload a ton of stuff, I got Cox Clips. And so, the idea is I'm trying to create shorts to put there. And for the most part, I'm like mixing and matching between the main channel and there. Basically, the shorts don't show up on the timeline at all. They're like a separate thing. It's wild.

But you can upload them there. And so I'm trying to figure out what the best way to do that is. And I want to make little clippy things. And I want to make, like, here's a goof from a Twitch stream. Something like that. But the process of doing that, I found, is really difficult. Because everyone that I work with, because they aren't in office, it's like, okay, here's what I want to do. Here's my thoughts.

Here's the clip. And then the product to get back, here's what I want to do. Here's my thoughts. Here's the clip. And then the product to get back is nothing like I was, what I was thinking. And I'm like, okay, so if this person was in the office, I could have looked like at what they were working on, seen it before I saw the final product, talked about what it was. Instead, it's like working on a thing. Okay. Let's see what you made. That's nothing like what I wanted. And then so it falls on me to be like, hey, all that work you did, I didn't like it. Can you do something else? Then I feel like an asshole because I can't catch them in time because I can't see what they're working on because they aren't in the office. So I'm contemplating whether I need to hire someone to come in and be like in charge of Cox Clips, which is insane because it's literally just supposed to be a place where I dump stuff that serves no purpose to me whatsoever.

That's just like, oh yeah, it's an afterthought. The problem is I'm finding myself now having to think about it more in the front of my brain than I want to. It is, I'm like, all right did i uh get a thing ready for that channel today today this and now i'm just like oh my god now i'm running two youtube channels i hate it grandor it's a terrible choice i've made and i and i don't understand i still don't understand i want to try some shorts now i feel like i haven't done enough shorts and i'm like i think you would be a king among the shorts because there are, I'm going to say, dozens if not hundreds of videos in your repertoire that are literally shorts before shorts existed. It's true.

I predate the game. Yeah, you could do it. If you made shorts with Kat, I guarantee they'd be successful. It's funny because I was looking at my stuff and it actually took four of my videos and just put them as shorts. Yeah, because if you are under a certain amount of time and also the algorithm picks up all sorts of different things. It's under 60 seconds. It's if it is vertical instead of horizontal. And there's one other thing.

And then it used to be you had to include hashtag shorts But I don't know that you need to I don't think so anymore Yeah I think like you would be a star I believe this I think you don't even need to Make another channel You could just upload it Because it's who you are

You could just upload the shorts And people would be like You see that Crandor short And I'd be like y'all That's what I gotta do This is it shorts and people would be like you see that Crendor short? And I'd be like, y'all. That's what I gotta do. This is it. I found it. I gotta start shorts.

YouTube.com slash Crendor. YouTube.com slash Crendor. That's the one. See, I got one. Non-content from 2018. Weirdest commercial I've ever seen. It's 41 seconds and it's just a weird 40 second commercial yeah there's look the other night i saw a video commercials oh my god the

other night i was watching tv i think i was watching uh chopped or something and i was like cleaning up the apartment but straight up on tv a commercial appeared that was like cleaning up the apartment, but straight up on TV, a commercial appeared that was like, welcome to my vagina in here. I'm in charge. I was like, what the hell? And it was just like this woman in her vagina. And she was just like talking about how she was using birth control. But it was like, I don't take a pill. I inject this gel and i'm like

what the hell is happening and i couldn't believe it was on tv i was like this is on american tv this is crazy and it was just like yeah so you know this is how i love my vagina and i treat it well and the last line is there's like a ding dong she goes i'm coming and like winks at the camera and i'm like what the hell crendor i couldn't believe it i recorded some of it uploaded it to twitter and i was like i am this would be an amazing react kind of uh you know story or or tiktok or whatever because i've never seen anything like it in my life. I was like, I love this commercial. I can't believe this exists. But I'm also shocked that it somehow got on TV.

I'm so excited. This is going to be it. Even the other day, I had a thing I saw. It would have been a perfect short. I was watching the football game, but I left it on and then did something else, and it finished. So the news came on, and they're like, today in the city, some guy's mad about some statue.

And then it cuts to this old bald man. He's like, they're taking down the statue. You can't just take down the statue, are you bonkers? And I was like, dude, I want to know more about this statue. I could have made that into a short People also would have joined in And you can do that You even have on February 26th

2021 It is non-content coffee I don't think you talk at all In this video it's just you drinking coffee Looking into the distance But in order to capitalize on the memes This could have been a story. But then also at the end,

that library goes, mmm, good soup. That could have been this. It could have been like, oh, it was soup all along. It wasn't coffee. That would have been a hilarious goof. Yeah, this is it.

This is how I get back into the game. Soup. That's it. This is it. I think you would be a stellar shorts person. I'm going to let you know, your best content, under 30 seconds. Oh, that's no matter. I don't disagree with you at all.

That's what I'm saying. I need to do a short where I open a Pokemon card pack, but I do it real fast. I'm going to be like, all right, let's open this Pokemon card pack. Then I look through and I'm like, that's your Pokemon card pack, but I open like I do it real fast and be like, alright, let's open this Pokemon card pack and I look through and I'm like that's your Pokemon card pack of the day and that's it. That hits all the things you got. It's short enough, people watch it. Everybody loves Pokemon cards now, right? I might get a rare

one. Boom, this is gonna be huge. Pokemon pack of the day. I love that. The pee-pee of the day. Your pee-pee of the that. The pee-pee of the day. Your pee-pee of the day. The pee-pee of the day. Welcome back to your pee-pee of the day. Your daily pee-pee.

Everybody's going to love it. Everyone's going to want to see your daily pee-pee. Yeah. No doubt. All right. This is huge. All right. I'm glad I figured it out.

You're welcome. I've unlocked. My sorrow and my struggles have unlocked something great for you. Oh, that's the other thing I realized. There's a thing where you can clip stuff now. Do you see that? Yeah. Yeah.

People have been clipping all sorts of my stuff this week. Yeah. I clipped for my new pointless top 10, my bat facts. Did you know that bats could catch fish? I mean, I do now. Thanks to your amazing video, I do now. Yeah, so that's pretty neat. But that could have been a short.

Actually, it probably could still be a short. Like you got non-content rolling dice until I get three sixes. That could literally be a daily, like, all right, 60 seconds to get six sixes or three sixes or whatever. And that's like 60 seconds and go, go, go, go. Oh, 60 seconds to get six sixes or three sixes or whatever. Yeah. And that's like 60 seconds. Go, go, go, go. Oh, I didn't get it. That kind of thing. You could do that easily.

Oh, my God. Yeah. Oh, my God. This is all right. I got it. The potential is limitless. Limitless. Limitless potential.

I don't know how to TikTok, but I do know how to short on YouTube. It's the same thing youtube it's the same thing it's the same thing except on tick tock in order to be successful you have to be like i don't know 16 i don't know what the rules are i just know that on tick tock the successful people all look like they're 12 to me and i'm like oh my god well i think there is also the tick tock demographic for like the boomer people because they're like look it's old people trying to do it so some of them are funny like right the kids, look, it's old people trying to do it. So some of them are funny. Like, right.

The kids are like, look at that old person trying to do the young person things. And they're like, right. I mean, that's what, that's what I, that's what I do on there. See, there's your problem. You're trying to do like actual, like, oh, here's clips from my real videos. Nobody wants that. What a fool I am. They want you eating cereal.

You know what? Maybe that's the plan from now on. Just like this one. Non-content, this deodorant smells like Starburst. This would be an amazing short. Cat wags his tail a lot That's a great one Yeah look at that Cat Yanni or Laurel

That's a sea of so many And they're all here And you're just not You know that Cat Yanni or Laurel That video That would have been an amazing short At the time it was timely and like you would have killed yes i would have dominated this thing see here we go this is from

2014 this is stop the content before it starts with jesse cox 10 seconds it's you in an elevator and i'm like all right we're about to film and here we go. And then you throw a water ball at me? No, I just stopped the video. It was long where you threw a water ball at me. And I'm like, what are you doing? I believe that was the one where I rolled it down the stairs. Uh-huh.

Okay. Was it the stairs? Oh wait, no. There is one where I throw a water ball at you, yes. Yeah, see? 24 seconds, 141,000 views. See? That is an amazing, amazing example of the power of the short.

You're the voice we need. If anything, they'll recognize how terribly wrong the whole process is and we won't have shorts anymore. Or you'll make a fortune. Either way, I like this future for you. And I shall answer. I'm ready. Yes, I like this.

I think this is a good strategy. Actually, can I make, like,x and crendor youtube channel shorts sure that'd be something i could throw up there i don't know how but go for it go nuts all right yeah there's gotta be maybe there's like uh something some old video of us maybe i'll re-watch an old video of us and put it up on the podcast channel you know go nuts go nuts do whatever all right we've gone in the full-blown experimentation phase I like it I like it a lot oh yeah now I just need sleep well you know what else you need hey hello fresh hello fresh is the best way to get fresh, pre-measured ingredients

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One pan. 10, 15 minutes. If you're just like a dude on his lonesome, let me tell you, those pan things, eat half, save the other half for tomorrow. That's a good ass lunch. That's good. I'm just saying. HelloFresh makes cooking and learning to cook so simple. It is one of my favorite parts of it is getting something and you get it in the bag and you're like, okay, what?

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could learn, could use to learn. All you gotta do if you want to get in on some HelloFresh is go to HelloFresh.com slash Cox14 and use code Cox14 for up to 14 free meals, including free shipping. All you gotta do again, HelloFresh.com slash Cox14, use code COX14 for up to 14 free meals, including free shipping.

All you gotta do, again, HelloFresh.com slash COX14. Use code COX14 for up to 14 free meals, including free shipping. That is why it is America's number one meal kit. Also today we're brought to you by Babbel. Babbel's the number one selling language learning app. Through Babbel's incredible bite-sized lessons, you're going to learn a new language using all these new language skills that you can actually use in the real world. From greetings, menus, and directions to gaining a deeper understanding of the culture, Babbel is a travel essential. And now that we all are starting to travel again, and I know COVID still sucks, but a lot of places in the world are doing great when it comes to vaccines and protection.

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Right now, when you purchase a three-month Babbel subscription, you'll get an additional three months for free. That's six months for the price of three. Just go to Babbel.com and use promo code COX. That's Babbel, B-A-B-B-E-L.com, code COX. Babbel, language for life. All right, let's go jump into something. Oh boy, we got some traffic out here today. You might be like, man, is this segment going to have actual traffic this time? Is it going to be some random fact? Are we going to learn something? Um, I don't know.

Honestly, do we ever really learn something from traffic outside of the fact that what you learn is a byproduct of your brain remembering? Back to you. Thanks, Crandor. I have no idea what you said. Oh, right. My brain remembering. I don no idea what you said. All right. My brain remembering.

I don't even know. Whatever. I don't even know how to unpack all that. Also, let's go to the weather. Weather time. How's it going? We're at the weather desk now. We are at the weather desk.

How's it going? It's going pretty good over're at the weather desk now. We are at the weather desk. How's it going? It's going pretty good over here at the weather desk. I believe we had a pretty good weather recommendation. Let me see if I can find it. Also, from last week, someone said, think the word Crandor is looking for is decrypting. That probably was the word you were looking for. Yeah, I think it was.

In fact, I'm pretty sure it was. Oh, this one sounds cool. I don't even think it was the one I was looking for yeah i think it was yes in fact i'm i'm pretty sure it was oh this one sounds cool i don't even think it's the one i was looking for uh scarabray in the orkney islands of scotland it's a stone age village which looks a bit like hobbiton yo i like that yeah that cool. All right, let's check out. Scababray? Scababray. S-K-A-R-A. Scababray. Is that really how it's said?

Is this one of those things where I'm going to find out it's called like scababray? It probably is scababray. Okay. It's not even showing up in the thing. Oh, here we go. It's not showing up on weather.com. I guess here's weather now co UK. Wow.

The shit though. I read. All right. Good. Wappy. Wappy activated. Scarab Bray, Scotland hourly weather. Weather now.

Not code. Not UK reprogramming. Check out weather now in Scarab Bray. Today. Monday. October 18th 2021 cloudy 11 degrees celsius rain zero millimeters humidity 81 atmospheric pressure hpa odd non-American numbers, wind speed, kilometer, H, southeast, dew point, 8 Celsius. What is happening over there? Clouds, 100%. Low clouds, 100%.

Medium clouds, 48%. High clouds, 100%. Speaking of high clouds, what is happening there? Cloudy, cloudy, cloudy, light rain, cloudy, cloud, cloud, cloud, cloud, cloud, cloud, cloud. Sorry, the metric system broken. This is why we don't use Wapio. We need to upgrade. This is why we don't use the metric system.

Right. We, for some reason, decided to create a robot that has zero knowledge of the metric system. It's a weird choice on our part, but yeah. Yeah. It pretty much just seems cloudy. Right. So many clouds, high and low. A lot of clouds.

Have you seen any of the village? Yeah. Wow. of clouds have you seen any of the village yeah wow it does have a little like uh it really does have this kind of like old quaint yeah whoever lived here long ago definitely lived in like little hobbit holes hey you like lived on the ground look at that oh that's that's very cute a prehistoric village that is pretty cool although i don't know if it used to have grass growing on it maybe it's like after time that happened on if it used to be i'm gonna assume yes they're saying it was occupied 3100 bc oh my god yeah wow that's crazy and this is time out Time out. And this isn't even like, wow, that is way north.

So this is, I get why it would be underground-ish. Because if you look at Scotland, look at how hot it is on the second northernmost island chain. Oh, wow. It is way up there. Oh, yeah, that is way up there oh yeah that is that is way up there but also can we talk about the insanity that is the fact there's just a straight line going through scotland that i never noticed before a straight line what do you see there's like a line of locks i assume they are from inverness all the way down to fort william there's just a straight line of water. Let's see.

On the map. That seems... You know what? That's aliens is what that is. Oh, I do see it. It's weird looking, right? It doesn't seem... It's weird looking. Yeah, it looks like the land is breaking off from the other part of the way. Maybe it is. I don't know.

I don't want to be attached to you. of the way maybe it is i don't know we don't want to be attached to you yeah it's yeah it's on the inverness border i guess all the way down yeah you've got like all the way down to fort william and it's just like we don't want the rest of this yeah you've got like western inverness and then eastern inverness and one's on the left half one's on the right half that's crazy i the right half. That's crazy. I love that. That's interesting. I wonder what it's like up there. Is it like really Scottish? You know what I mean? Like, you know, there's Glasgow

and Edinburgh and everyone's like, oh yeah, you know, Scotland. And then there's like that's up there. You gotta believe that that's like really Scottish. Oh yeah, like the super Scottish. Like how big are these places like not huge right oh yeah i just dropped in and it is it is farmland it is powerful farmland

that is a powerful farmland powerful farmland unless i found cows Cows. Got more grass. Cows. Hills. I'm really curious about this town. I want to know more. External maps. I'm going to go Google Maps. Take me.

Take me. What's going on in this area? Oh, my God. The Swayne Bun Box. The Swayne Bun Box? Yeah, the Sweeney Bun Box. Hold on, I gotta link you this. Alright, click that.

And then, look at the picture below. We definitely need to do a Weather report on that town We do When you're on your way to Finston Kirkwall Make sure to stop by this town That's there By the Sweeney Bun Box I want to know what the bun box is

I don't know Is there any information about the bun box is. I don't know. Is there any information about the bun box? Are there buns in the box or is it boxes for buns? There's a five-star review from Joe, but he doesn't say anything. Here's the Sweeney Bun Box. There's a brewery. There's got to be a lot of those, right? Hey, come to our northern.

Wow, this brewery looks like it is old as hell. Wow. I love that. I love old-ass looking stuff that has, like, dudes just drunk in it. It's one of my favorite things. That's why I love the UK. There's tons of old-ass stuff where, like, dudes are just like, Oh, come on in and get yourself a pint.

You're like, yes, sir. I will. It's just, you know, that's been passed down through generations, the drinking in old places. Yeah, I'm sure the Romans did it. Everyone's done it. Everyone's like, meet me at the old ruins. Let's get twisted.

And back in the day, those ruins used to be something And then they'd drink there in their family Yeah I'm sure there were ruins of other things back in the day Right? Like you know if these people were around 3000 BC And Rome was like You know 400 BC

All I'm saying is it's a thing. Yeah. And, I mean, that's the weather. All right. Let's go to sports. Sports. Welcome to the sports desk where we got sports, sports, sports, Where we got sports, sports, sports. That was my new sports song.

Great song. Thank you. I thought it was going to have a whole thing, but it's fine. Not at all. Steelers currently up on the Seahawks. Seahawks also playing with all Russell Wilsons. That's a pretty boring game. Raiders beating the Broncos. or they beat the Broncos.

Cowboys beat the Patriots in overtime. Cardinals beat the Browns. Bengals beat the Lions. Packers beat the Bears. Chiefs beat the Washington football team. The Colts beat the Texans. The Rams beat the Giants. The Ravens beat the Chargers.

The Vikings beat the Panthers in overtime. And the Jacksonville Jaguars finally won, and it had to come against the Miami Dolphins in England. So the... Well... Just took them playing in a different country to win. Yeah.

That's what I'm saying. And the Buccaneers beat the Eagles. Then, in baseball, the Red Sox and the Buccaneers beat the Eagles. Then, in baseball, the Red Sox and the Astros are tied at one apiece over in that series, and the Braves are up one-nothing on the Dodgers, and currently, as of this recording, they are tied at two in the bottom of the fifth inning.

So, I'm pulling for the Braves. I do not like the Dodgers. Not a big Dodgers fan. They had a lot of battles with the Cubs. Ruined probably more Cub chances. So very dumb. Go Braves. And then hockey has started up.

The Kraken. The Kraken are a team that's pretty neat. I like them. The Seattle Kraken. They got three points. They're in second place. Go Kraken. Love the name. I like them. The Seattle Kraken. They got three points. They're in second place. Go Kraken. Love the name. Love their look.

I'm not a big Seattle sports guy fan, but it's neat. They got a cool thing. And then the Buffalo Sabres are tied in first place. That might not last very long. It feels like Buffalo should just always have... You know, like Buffalo, that's their thing, is hockey.

What else? I mean, you know, I'm not like a huge Bills fan. They don't have baseball. So that's it. You got hockey. How are you not always first? Yeah. Come on.

Come on. Come on. And then the NBA starting up this week. I'm pretty excited about that. Bulls went undefeated in the preseason. I'm ready for some up this week. I'm pretty excited about that. Bulls went undefeated in the preseason. I'm ready for some regular season basketball. I'm hyped. I love me some basketball.

And that starts on Tuesday with Brooklyn against Milwaukee and Golden State against the Lakers. Also, in the WNBA, the Chicago Sky won the WNBA finals. There you go. Chicago finally won something. Hooray. Hooray. So congrats to them. And it's sports.

Okay. What's our weird fact of the day? Weird fact of the day. This one is going to be about... Oh, should I do this one? These are both good. All right, these are both kind of tied into the UK, so we'll do both.

The teabag was an accidental invention. Of course it was. In 1908, New York tea merchant Thomas Sullivan sent samples of tea leaves to some of his customers in small silken bags. Many of the recipients assumed the bags were supposed to be used in the same way as the metal infusers, so they put the entire bag into the teapot rather than emptying out its contents. After positive feedback from the happy accident, Sullivan designed intentional teabags for commercial production. In the

1920s, his sachets made of gauze and later paper included the string with the tag hanging over the side so they could be easily removed. So look at that. I mean, I get it. I had to include this one.

Almost 163,000 pints of Guinness are wasted in facial hair each year. They mean just like what it clings to your face? I guess so. I hate that. An actual research study commissioned by Guinness found that an estimated 162,719 pints of Irish stout go to waste every year via mustaches. They found that 0.56 milliliters of Guinness get trapped in the average beard or mustache with each sip, and it takes about 10 sips to finish a pint. An estimated 92,370 Guinness consumers every year in the UK have facial hair. Assuming they consume on average 180 pints each year,

the total cost wasted is about $536,000 annually. It tells me a lot of people drink Guinness. A lot. A lot. If that's the case of just because I know I've been a victim of the mustache thing, right? And it doesn't seem like a lot. So what they're telling me is that there's so much Guinness that is drank in the world that it all balances out in that weird way. That's crazy.

Yeah. No, that is pretty insane. That's your weird facts today. All right. What's your big news story today? Big Facts of the Day. All right. What's your big news story of the day? Big news story of the day. Day. Day.

Day. Pew pew pew. Pew pew pew pew pew. Florida man with half gallon of Captain Morgan and swords sets fire in road. Whoa. Sets fire to what? Morgan and swords sets fire in road. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,

whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,

whoa, Whoa, Whoa, Whoa, Whoa, Whoa, Whoa, Whoa,

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Whoa, Whoa, Whoa, Whoa, Whoa, Whoa, Whoa, Whoa,

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Whoa, Whoa, Whoa, Whoa, Whoa, Whoa, Whoa, Whoa,

Whoa, , , Whoa, , , , ,

, , I think He's got his booze. He's got his swords. And he sets fire. Sets fire to what? Himself? How did? What? All right, let's see. You got authorities say when they arrived to four feet high flames in a Brevard County roadway, they found a man holding a sword and drinking alcohol. As one would do. Yeah.

Typical Florida day. Deputies say they were on active patrol when they spotted the flames on Craig Avenue in Titusville around 2.12 a.m. According to the police, the fire was in front of a man's home who they visited around five times in the past six months for illegal burns. All that adds up. Officials say the fires range from being on the sidewalk to taking up the entire street. Imagine that being your neighbor. It's like, God, he's setting fire to the road again. I mean, everyone has a neighbor that does something weird.

The fire thing is just Florida. That's true. I mean, there's the difference between, like, the green cheetah and, like, an old man who sits in his chair watching birds and a guy who's setting fire to the road. Here's the thing. He has a sword, so it's within his right. I'm a guy who's setting fire to the road. Here's the thing. He has a sword, so it's within his right. I'm not going to tell him not to. The man has a sword.

It's like, hey, can you go to the grocery store? It's like, I can't. He's in the road with the sword again. Yeah, we got to wait. Let's just wait until he tires himself out. Just swing it around. I got my boots and I got my sword and now I can't stop me. Maybe he thinks he is Captain Morgan.

I'm Captain Morgan. Avast, you mateys. Avast, you mateys. Officials say when they went to speak with suspect Scott Taylor, he was sitting in his front yard holding a sword in his hand and had a knife in his waistband. Police say he was also actively drinking in front of them and began chugging from half-gallon-sized Captain Morgan Spice rum. Authorities say he dropped the knife and sword when asked, but could not provide an answer to why he started a fire in the roadway.

He was arrested, taken to the police department. Started a fire? So he just started a fire in the road of what? Just the road? That seems awful. Police say while the man was in a holding cell, he intentionally broke a fire sprinkler head, causing water to flood the cell and the booking room.

The man was eventually transferred to Brevard County J they're like how you take him he faces charges of intentional or reckless burning of lands and felonial felony criminal mischief huh all right there you go it's just as weird as we thought it was still no answers but a man set a road on fire and then he got drunk yeah that is that's a prime florida story oh by the way it really is have you seen squid game yet i have not seen squid game yet i need to watch it so we can do a whole episode on it oh yeah i watched it it was it was a journey let me tell you as a wild ride it's only nine episodes but once you start an effort once you start once you get in there you're gonna be like what the shit and you're gonna be in I guarantee all right Guarantee. All right. I'll watch it. Okay. All right. Fantastic. All right.

Well, that's it for us. Thank you so much for listening, watching, however you're enjoying this podcast. Crendor, hit them with the socials. Socials. We got youtube.com slash coxandcrendorpodcast. All one word. Find all these podcasts. I might upload a short on there and see what happens.

I don't know what I'm going do but some sort of you should do it you're a short master well you gotta do it i'm gonna upload shorts everywhere on my main channel on the youtube wow corinne door we're gonna do it short city warhammer channel i'll be like this is how you paint a sword and it's just gonna be like yeah i can't even tell it not even gonna spoil it all right uh also we're on spotify itunes soundcloud we'll be all over uh also check out our main stuff we got youtube.com so it's jess cox youtube.com crendor twitter.com jess cox twitter.com crendor patreon jess cox patreon crendor facebook jess cox facebook crendor instagram notorious cox instagram crendor was taken and And yeah. All right.

That's it. We'll see you all next time. And as always, to be continued.