Cox n' Crendor Show - Episode 315 - 9 Years For This?!

Episode Date: November 15, 2021

This week the boys dive deep into the well of Cosmo "articles" to uncover one of the most ridiculous things EVER! Also did you know it's the 9 year anniversary of the show?! Jesse sure didn't! All this and much much more on a brand new Cox n' Crendor! Go to http://babbel.com and use promo code COX to get an extra 3 months for FREE! Go to http://calm.com/cox for 40% off unlimited access to Calm's entire library!

Today's episode is brought to you by Calm. Calm is here to help you relax, baby. Also today, we're also today, we're brought to you by Babbel. Babbel is out there giving you an easy way to learn a new language. We'll talk about that as well. Now let's jump into this podcast. Hello, everybody. It's time for Ghost on Trend Dog.

Ghost on Trend Dog in the morning. In the morning. In the morning! Broadcasting live, live, live, live, live! In 4-hour recording studios. Recording! Wake your ass up! It's Cox and Crendor in the morning! Hello everybody, welcome to an exciting episode of Cox and Crandall in the morning Whoa, what was that? You're speaking in tongues

That was just a bunch of garbled up energy It did seem like garbled up energy It seemed like you were one of those people the preacher was like Get out of there seemed like you were one of those people the preacher was like, get out of there, demon. And you were like, oh, the puppet. And you're like, get out of there, demon. You got to leave Crandall's body. Definitely left.

Oh, yeah. No, he was out. He's like, this guy's talking crazy. I'm getting out of here. Yeah, demon jumped right out. He's like, oh, man, what the hell? I picked this body? Oh, I got to get out of this one.

So, yeah, I got the demons out. How are you doing? I'm doing good. Man, I had a lot of, like, weird discoveries this week. And it's things that you have to ask yourself why i discovered these and i'm not i don't i don't have a good reason like the first one i was on bing again okay don't ask why i don't know why i just ended up on bing yes it is it's the microsoft search engine that no one search engine yes okay all right just chatted i knew i heard that before

and i was like wait is that the is that it don't ask me how i got there i don't even remember how it happened like i said i just ended up things happen and when i was on there i was on a photo i think i found a photo and i clicked the photo and it took me to the photos in Bing. Okay. And what I learned is, I guess Microsoft is trying to add as many features as possible to make it worth going there over Google, which I still wouldn't,

but they have all these other features, and I noticed that if you click a photo in Bing, and again, don't take my word for this, I was on there for, I'm going to say Six minutes total, but let's say you take a photo And in the background is your TV On Bing It'll be like, hey, we've detected there's stuff In this photo, do you want to highlight it?

And do a search For what's in the photo And I was like, what does that mean? And I noticed in the background of this person's photo There was their computer monitor, and there was a little Blue ball that appeared over the computer monitor I clicked the blue ball it pops up like 800 images

of the monitor and is like hey do you want to buy this monitor and I was like what the hell is this so it's like scanning your photos finding the merch in your life and then being like hey viewer do you want the same thing this

person has? That's crazy to me. I was blown away by that. I was like, that is, I can't tell if that's genius technology or pure evil. I don't know. Meanwhile, what's more insane is I tried to do a face so you can like highlight a face. The problem is, is if you click, if you just click a face,

it will be like, oh, we'll match the color of this person's face. It's like, no, I don't want the, I don't want like a color swatch. I want like the face.

So I realized we had to do like a highlight the whole face. And then it'll look for people that look similar. And it turns out that unless you are very very popular i've taken a million photos all it does is find like artwork that looks similar to you and so i uh dare everyone out there to just go you know look up crendor and i on bing and then highlight our face do an image search of what it brings up. And I guarantee, it'll most likely bring up other photos of us, but I'm curious what else it says like, that's a match. Because when I did that, nothing.

It was artwork from like 1812 was what matched this face. And I was like, well, you know, gamers existed back then, I guess. I didn't know Bing was going that crazy with their technology. Neither did I. I don't use it. I don't use it at all. I also didn't know Bing still existed. Neither did I.

Again, I'm not sure how I got there. The same thing happened to me earlier this week with Twitter. So I don't know how I discovered this. I don't know why I know this. I definitely didn't look it up. But at some point, I discovered that Twitter Blue is't know why I know this. I definitely didn't look it up. But at some point, I discovered that Twitter Blue is a thing. Twitter Blue?

It's a Twitter subscription. Twitter Blue. So is it like, what do you get from it? Well, this is the thing. It's Twitter Blue. I don't know why I want to buy this. I can't. It's three bucks a month, I guess. And you get folders for bookmarks which i don't know why you would use that no the and then you get a reader mode which lets you take all the

different tweets someone makes and puts it into one concise thing to read which like i don't know i can read multiple tweets that's not a big problem problem for me. And then you get the ability to undo a tweet. And I was like, oh, that could be good. Right? Maybe that could work. And it literally says, typo, forget to tag someone. Preview and revise your tweet before it goes live. With Undo Tweet, you can set a customizable timer of up to 30 seconds to click undo before the

tweet, reply, or thread you've sent posts to your timeline. Again, maybe I'm crazy, but that just sounds like proofreading your tweet. Yeah, it literally is just proofreading your tweet. Why are you paying for it? Why does it give you 30 seconds to undo? Well, what if i tweet and then two hours later i'm like boy i wish i hadn't tweeted that that's why people need it they don't need it for like the first 30 seconds yeah garbage what a garbage offering and i yeah

and i don't know how i found this out either i just randomly stumble on crap crendor and i don't this is how bad I am at technology, where I'm like on a computer trying to get work done, and suddenly I'm like, what's Twitter blue? And then I'm down a rabbit hole looking up stuff that I definitely don't need and will never use. Yeah, I know. Wow.

You do have a knack for it. That's what I'm saying. I don't know why I get here, why I discover, wow. You do have a knack for it. That's what I'm saying. I don't know why I get here, why I discover these things, but yeah. Now I know weird things about Bing and weird things about Twitter that I never cared about and will forget by the time we're done with this podcast. Are you on a work computer? Or are you doing, when you're doing work, do you just randomly, like, branch off into mystery lane? Sometimes.

I've realized that I don't. I don't know. Do you do this? I realize that I don't have a lot that interests me. I was about to say I don't have a lot going for me. Well, that's not true. That's not true, ladies. I'm very cool and successful.

No. I can tell. Going for me well that's not true Ladies I'm very cool and successful Uh no I There'll be times When I am done With work or done with a project or taking A break or doing something and I will Think to myself oh I want to Go look at this Right except

The older I get there's less and less things I'm like oh I want to go look at And back in the day it used to be Oh I'd go look at One of my favorite websites that did movie reviews But then that website Sold out and all the reviews were also ads And I was like well this is garbage

And it's that way with a lot of things On the internet I now see through the matrix code Of everything I used to enjoy and because these days everything's algorithms and mathematic i i see the game everyone's playing and it ruins the experience for me i used to do things online and now i'm i just cursory glance at them you know like i used to spend hours deep diving into stuff, and now I'm like, I don't know. I will say I think I'm lying.

I do go to Reddit frequently. That is a thing. I do go to Reddit frequently, and I definitely peruse certain Reddits often, but mostly they're like crazy Guy goes crazy and I'm like oh Yeah it is good and so I watch that But um Picture you

Yeah I don't I don't know I just don't I it's Weird now where I used To just get lost in Surfing the internet and now I'm just Kind of over the internet i don't know how to describe it i'm like so worn down by the internet's existence that i'm like over it well i think uh i was kind of thinking about this the other day i was also listening to like uh

i don't know if you've ever seen dr k you probably haven't who is dr Dr. K? So he's like, there's Healthy Gamer GG or something. It's like they've got really big on Twitch as like a gamer psychologist, but like he's an actual like Harvard psychologist. So he's not just like, I'm a gamer psychologist with a degree in like astrophysics or something. Yeah, the first Healthy Gamer GG. Yeah, so he's got videos on like literally everything he's talked like a bunch of big streamers i need to look at this why do you only get motivated after midnight that's the yeah i'm gonna tell you last night i was like you know during the day like man i have

so much stuff to do it midnight hit and i was cleaning my house. I don't know why that's the one for me. All right. Interesting. Anyway, please. He's got a lot of those videos where like you actually learn stuff when you when you watch it. So I was like, it's pretty neat. And so there was one I was watching is a while ago. I can't remember.

But it was about phones and how like your phone just constantly is releasing like dopamine and everything. Because it's like obviously you're you want to check it because every time you get a little notification you'll think it's just like bing bing dopamine you know or serotonin i mean there's more chemicals but that's just the those those the big ones but mainly i started realizing that and i was like back when we even first started doing this right right? Like, we didn't even have smartphones, really. Like, they were just becoming a thing. So even if you had one, it was, like, not as, you know, crazy as it is today. Everything was a little more...

Like, I remember back with YouTube when they were like, we're going to add the ability to use mobile to watch YouTube. And I was like, this is stupid. Like, I was, like, actively like I can't believe that I have to use the YouTube mobile this is so dumb why can't they just watch it on the desktop PC well now it's like probably like 80 to 90 percent of people watching are watching on mobile or tablets or whatever it might be and so when I thought about that I was like dude I feel like back then right you'd go on the internet you just go on your your your PC, you'd look, and you're like, all right, I'm done now.

And then you'd detach from that PC. But now, you're literally just carrying a PC with you constantly. Right. And I feel like everybody doing that, it's like you're always connected. That becomes a meme where everybody's like, you're just always connected, man. But now, you literally are always connected. And so I feel like people are just constantly feeling the need to check their things and post their things and do their thing. And it's like, that alone has kind of made the internet just feel like too much.

It kind of feels like work. And that, yes, it is our work and it's what we do But also It's the same reason why For example in you know back in The hardcore Jesse Warcraft days Everyone and their brother was like I'm loving 80 alts and I was like I don't want to do that

I hate that The idea of feeling like I have to work At something that I should be thinking is fun Does that make any sense Which I think is a problem like I have to work at something that I should be thinking is fun. Does that make any sense? Which I think is a problem that I have in general in life. Where I'm like, oh man. You can make workouts fun.

Yeah. And not just like, I'm grinding my health. If that makes sense. And now because of all the work we do for the internet. you know, places like Twitter and things, they aren't fun anymore. I see through the matrix coding. I see when people post a photo and then two hours later reply to their own photo as nothing more than marketing. This person is marketing their image and they're playing the algorithm game where now that you reply to it it bumps it up again so now it's in people's eyes like that kind of thing but did you not see that back in the day no no of course not and i don't think it was a

thing back in the day i mean i guess your definition of back in the day is how long ago right like even five years ago that's not the way it was yeah yeah i was saying like five ten right in 2016 there was not there was not that much algorithmically behind i would say i think everyone would agree a lot of the algorithm takeover started in like 2017 2018 yeah where suddenly and you know a lot of youtube people will complain that youtube went downhill in 2017 and uh you know i have a lot of friends who were like, I was doing great, and then suddenly I stalled. And YouTube changed everything. I think that happened to everyone.

I think it's like sports. Because in sports, they used to just be like, oh, you know, you got some stats and stuff. But now they have like a billion different stats. And it's just like they have the super metrics and they have all these things they're like uh technically when it's third and 17 you want to run the ball because there's the thing where you can do this thing and that thing and like technically you want to shoot as many three-pointers as you can because the statistics show the blood and like they go crazy with statistics now and it's like become a point where like statistics rule over just like you know

just playing with your playing with your gut, going with your big-time gut feelings and just believing in yourself. Although you do that too much, and then that's also dumb. You need a good balance. Well, and that's what sucks is that the balance is out of whack at the moment where everyone, at least in our industry, I'd say most influencer, ooh, I still hate that word, influencer-centric worlds, it's all about the algorithm. It's all about, you know, I just learned. So for a long time I've always been like, why when people on Instagram or people in different social media things, when they post their sexy photo, why underneath it is it always like, remember to get vaccinated.

It's a good day today. Or it's like, what do you all think of pizza? Reply in the comments, that kind of thing. comments, that kind of thing. And I discovered that besides that being a way to get people to interact with you, really, also, apparently there's algorithms that detect when you put, I don't know, naughty things in text. So if I was supposed to post a sexy photo and then underneath it say,

I'm looking to grind on some butts tonight, right? Right. That would get flagged. But if I put the exact same sexy photo, but I put, did anyone see the new Marvel movie Eternals? What do you think? Then it's fine. Yeah. Crazy. That kind of thing.

And so it's just a lot. It's overwhelming. And so I find myself disconnecting more and more, not because I don't love the internet. It's where I hang out the most. But it's also when I want to not be working, I shut down all of it. Because now everywhere I go, I see work, right? I go to Twitter and I see people working. And I'm like, man, I should step up my Twitter game.

I'm terrible at this. Or I'll go to Instagram and be like, I don't should step up my Twitter game. I'm terrible at this. Or I'll go to Instagram and be like, I don't post enough on Instagram. What am I doing? Or I'll go to TikTok and be like, I don't even like this place and I feel like I should be doing something here. And so everything is part of that influencer ecosystem where we're always constantly being told like, get those numbers up, do this, do this. this it sucks it sucks that that's everything is numbers and and algorithms and equations and that means everything is work and if everything is work then i my disconnection from work is like don't even look at computers i think uh that's probably a good strat as well because I feel like every two to three weeks, maybe even more frequent, we have the Jesse hates YouTube discussion. It truly sucks that that's where my life is.

But let me tell you something. Yes, please do. We are three to four days away from the nine-year anniversary of this show. Oh, my God. We are nine years? Is that true? Nine years. Nine years doesn't mean anything.

Ten years would be a thing. That's true. November 18, 2012. First episode. That means we're nine years, almost a 10. That's crazy. Friday, November 18th, 2020 would be 10 years. On a Friday? Yeah.

I wonder if we can do a live show on a Friday, November 18th. That would be pretty fun. That would be pretty good. I wonder if we can do a live show on a Friday, November 18th. That would be pretty fun. That would be pretty good. Wow, that would be 10 years. That's a honker. 10 years. That's a honker.

I did write down one thing I saw, and it was a pretty wacky thing to see. So, you're driving, and I looked at the license plate in front, and it said, like, Bjork fan. And I was like, that's a weird license plate. It's a fan of Bjork. Then I saw their bumper stickers and other stickers. They had probably, like, 20 to 30 bjork stickers yo i i've never met anyone that into bjork i know one time i say it like alex sang bjork at karaoke and we all thought it was very funny uh but i've never known anyone to be like give me 80 bjork you know Bjork Actually I In college

It isn't Bjork But do you know who Annie DeFranco is? I don't think so Probably not This is like an early 2000s Sad girl kind of music And one of the girls That I went to college with

Her car was covered in Annie DeFranco Stuff And I was like It's like a weird thing to go 100 in on you know what i mean like i'm gonna put it all over my car everyone needs to know this is how i am like okay cool here's the thing like when i saw it i was like is this person just like an actual big bjork fan or are they just like doing this for memes? Like someone's like dude just put a bunch of Bjork stuff on your car. No one is out there

doing that for memes. No one's like you know what's really gonna nail it? Bjork. I don't know. There might be someone still. I refuse to accept this. There's no no one is out there just like

Bjork it is You gotta be a fan No one's goofing on Bjork No one's goofing I'm gonna say it right now No one is goofing Bjork may not be The most mainstream of music

But no one's goofing on Bjork That should be on a bumper sticker No one's goofing on Bjork Yeah That should be on a bumper sticker. No one's goofing on Bjork. By the way, Bjork is now 55 years old. Wow. Hey, welcome to time. Welcome to time and age.

Does Bjork still look like Bjork? BJ Ork. Bjork, Los Angeles tickets. No, images. Bjorkk. Bjork Los Angeles tickets. No, images. Bjork images. Bjork still just kind of looks like Bjork. Yeah. Kind of.

Just older Bjork. He does look like older Bjork now. Just older Bjork. That is. Yeah, what do you know? The album Bjork recorded as an 11-year child in 1977 oh man i bet that's like actually i wonder if it took her time to establish like her strange melodic like weird definitely it had to like oh, that's the thing.

Bjork wore the swan dress or a swan wrapped around her neck or something. Yeah, and everyone mocked her for that. And let me tell you, I think all those people died. And I'm not saying Bjork killed them. That's her music is actually weird death chants or something. Yeah, Bjork is like Death Note. chance or something yeah bjork is like death note is that if you if if you make fun of if you wear the same thing as bjork you do anything bjork you're dead that is honestly i could believe it i do believe it you don't mess with bjork bjork is is trouble. Bjork will come get your ass.

Just even, like, looking at some of these images, it's, like, it's one where she's, like, dressed up as a plant. I think she's a plant. She's dressed up as a plant? I think she's a plant. That's going to be a quote for the 10-year anniversary. I won't even remember it. It'll be like, oh, it was like 15 years ago. I don't even know.

Looks like a plant. I think she's a plant. That is the most Bjork quote I've ever heard. She looks like something. I think so. Yeah. You just accept it. Like, yeah, all right.

Yeah. So, yeah, all right. Yeah. So, yeah, that's the thing I saw on a license plate. I can't wait for someone who doesn't know who Bjork is to be like, who are they talking about? Let me Google this. And then you're done. You're going to be stuck in the world of Bjork and you're going to be like, what is this? That's it. Some 20-something who has no idea who Bjork is about to go down a rabbit hole And be like oh my god

Yeah I think Bjork would actually go over well With like the Zoomer generation I'm still confused Why we don't have a Bjork Lady Gaga Co-album Like a duet of some sort Bjork's gotta make a They both dress up insanely.

I guess Lady Gaga doesn't do that anymore. Yeah, even Lady Gaga is like, what is she doing now? Yeah, Lady Gaga is like, you know what, I'm out of my meat outfit phase. Yeah, she is now Lady Gaga slays the red carpet.

Yeah, now she's like, I am famous. I don't need to dress up like a diamond. Now she's just dressing up in a normal red dress. That's what I'm saying. I miss it. I miss when Lady Gaga was like, dress me up in oranges, you know? Yeah, like a bunch of oranges or like dressing up as like a steak or something.

Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Like the good old days. At least Bjork stuck with it. Exactly. Bjork was like, I'm going to my grave dressed like a plant. That's how she'll be reborn. Yeah.

Stick me in the earth like my other plant friends. Yeah, that was pretty neat. Yeah, that was pretty neat. Oh, well, you know what else is pretty neat? What? Oh, so good. I'm so good at this. So good.

Babble. Babble is the neat? What? Oh, so good. I'm so good at this. So good. Babble. Babble is the neatest way. The neatest. I'm sure they'll love that. It's the neatest way to learn a new language without it feeling intimidating, which let's be honest, the whole idea of learning a new language is intimidating. When I first decided to learn Spanish on Babbel, I have experience with Spanish. So I'm going in as a guy who can do Spanglish, and I'm trying to just pick it up again.

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that it isn't like a hundred people in a classroom in an online classroom. It's straight up just like there is a class with a teacher who can give you attention and I think that's really, really neat. there is a class with a teacher who can give you attention. And I think that's really, really neat. Plus it comes with a 20 day money back guarantee. Start your new language journey today with Babbel. Right now, when you purchase three months of Babbel, you get an additional three months free. That's six months for the price of three. Just go to

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That's calm.com. Over 100 million people around the world use Calm to take care of their minds. You can sleep more, stress less, live better with Calm. That's Calm.com slash Cox to get 40% off and unlimited access to Calm's entire library. All right, Grendor, let's go to chapter episode. This is Guy the Grendor. How's the traffic out there? Traffic time is a good time.

I was trying to turn it into a Christmas song. Nailed it. I mean, it was pretty all right. All right, I'll take it. So I'm going to use this time to instead mention that the Cox and Crandor secret menu has been drawn by someone. Allison drew it, and it is looking great. You can see it on the Twitter. It is fantastic. You've got the

McCox and Crandor, the Greystorm, the Tito Watson, the McCox, the McCrandor, the Newport Richie, the Guy Hira, and the McDappleberry all up there. You can check it out. Fantastic. Yes. Back to you. You know what I've noticed? A lot of people getting the McDappleberry.

Yeah, I noticed that too. Which, here's the thing. They're making me want to try it. I mean, now you gotta try it. Because I imagine, because they have, I imagine it has to be reasonably okay. Probably a lot of bread, like bready. But, I have to imagine the apple. And the pork. And the pork, right?

Like, you would think it would go well together. Yeah. No, I agree. It does seem like a good combo. Yeah. I guess that's why it's not named after anything we've ever truly done. Yeah. The McDoubleberry seems like its own thing.

It reminds me of when people would take french fries and dip them in a Frosty. You know what I mean? Like, it seems insane, but you know people love it. I feel like the McDappleberry, that's our signature dish. Yeah. I've seen very few people try the Newport Richie.

I feel like we need some Newport Richies. We do. I'm a huge fan, I think, of the fish sandwich with the four nuggets on it. I feel like that could be a winner. The McCrendor, honestly, is solid. I had that a few years ago.

That's why it's my thing. The McCox is too much. The McCox will kill you. The McCox is too much food. I don't know why I decided that was the one. It's too much. I mean, the guy here is the too much food. You get the double quarter pounder with a quarter pounder inside.

My favorite part about that is I can see it. You just take the quarter pounder, you have it, you put another quarter pounder in there, you cover it up. I mean, I get it. That one makes sense to me. That's the guy hero. That is the guy hero That is the guy hero The McCox is literally like A breakfast sandwich

With a What it reminds me of is Back in the day When I would get I don't remember how we got to the McCox Because when I used to work at McDonald's I would get a hamburger but then I'd put an egg on it from breakfast time Because my break was always between breakfast and lunch

So I have the best of both worlds And so this one is like Take Jesse's idea and amp it up to 12 egg on it from breakfast time because my break was always between breakfast and lunch so i have the best of both worlds and so this one is like take jesse's idea and amp it up to 12 which i feel like is not good it would not be good but oh well yeah no it's uh this is a menu that can stand the test of time aside from the fact that i don't think the bacon mcdouble exists anymore it definitely exists in la that's for sure does it i see it on the menu all the time really yeah interesting yeah i haven't seen the bacon mcdouble like in a while yeah the reason why i know this is because the gas station where i get my gas at has a McDonald's built into it. And so I can see that I can literally, as I'm pumping gas, I can just stare at people at the drive-thru.

And it's straight up just on the menu. I feel like we need to add something to it. Something that's not there. We need like a McDrink or something. A McDrink. That sucks. We need a McDrink or something. A McDrink? That sucks. We need a McDrink. The old

McDrink. There's gotta be something that we can include one of the weird like, you know, the Shamrock Shake. There's gotta be. When the Shamrock Shake comes around, how can we make that weird? Alright, let's see. There's McFlurries. There's uh... Let's see. There mcflurry's there's uh let's see there's the

mcafe yeah like oh what if oh what if we find a way to combine like a coffee like you get a black coffee right then you get a shamrock shake oh my god and then you take the shamrock shake and you put it in the coffee. Yeah, this is like, it's like going on alcohol levels without the alcohol. Yeah, like what if you got a black coffee, a small black coffee

in a large cup, right? Yeah. And then you got a shamrock shake and then you pour the shamrock shake into the cup. I bet that would be a treat. I don't know what that would taste like, but I think I need to be reminded when shamrock. When is that?

March? Whatever. Yeah. What would you call it? A McCox and cream door. A McCox and cream door. That's it. That's the door. That's it. That's the one.

I love it. It'll be here in a few months. That sucks. That name is terrible. That's the one. There you go. The latest edition. The McCox and Creamdor What a terrible drink

Although it could be delicious But I'm curious I don't know how they make the shamrock shake taste minty So I wonder if you're just about to have a menthol coffee Which is not good I mean it could be good You don't know I guess we'll find out in in six months time we will

however long five months um that's the uh traffic all right let's go to weather weather time we've got a weather request for or was it? There's a crazy one here. There's... Oh, God. I lost it. I lost it. Oh, boy. Oh, dear.

Hold on. Oh, I found it. The Moose Factory Canada located on Moose Factory Island. What? Moose Factory Island? It's a damn place called Moose Factory Island. Moose Factory Island. Located on the Moose River?

Yeah. Amazing. Island Located on the Moose River Yeah Amazing That is There's also a Moose Factory 68 What What is What's the difference Is that just like a road in Moose Factory Oh

Interesting so people are Asking where the name comes from, and people are saying it probably either referred to a fur trading post called The Factor, or there was a furniture company factory that once was located on the island. Oh, interesting. And it's Moose because of the river. Oh, I see. Huh. Alright. I'll take those answers. Get this.

They produce all moose in the world in Moose Factory. All moose. They produce all moose. Yeah. So in Moose Factory, it is currently feeling like 32 degrees Fahrenheit. It is a low of 28, humidity 96%.

We also have some SpaghettiOs happening. You never want SpaghettiOs. Pressure 29.63 inches. Visibility of 9 miles. Wind 3 miles an hour going east. Dew point 34. UV index 0 of 10. Moon phase waxing gibbous.

10 day. 10 day. 28 degrees tonight. Snow this evening. Will become snow showers late. 10 to 15 miles an hour. Northwest winds. 70% chance of the snow.

Monday, 33 with light snow. Tuesday, 31 with AM clouds, PM sun. Wednesday, 32 with snow. Thursday, 35 with snow. Friday, cloudy, 31. And Saturday, 35, mostly cloudy, followed by an entire week of 23 to 27 degrees and snow. So it is snowy and cold in Moose Factory. It's right on Hudson Bay.

That's crazy. So it's definitely cold. It is very cold. easy so it's definitely cold it is very cold what's wild about this is when i go to google and i type in moose factory island ontario the first image i see is tombstones do is this person who said go look do they live there do you live there viewer listener. Do you live on this island? Are you dead? Are you a ghost? Oh, wait. They said it was the first English-speaking settlement in Ontario, but really I just requested it because of the name.

You know what? I like it. Moose Factory Island. Crazy. Moose Factory Island. It's more north than I would ever live That's for sure Wow Yeah

That's a little too far north Yeah It does The crazy thing about it is The photos between winter and summer It's that kind of thing where I'm like Nope And they lure you in with a beautiful summer

It's very green And then winter comes and it's a hellscape. No, thank you. So, yeah, that's the weather. All right, let's go to sports. Sports. Sports. Although, if anyone wants to send us Moose Island merchandise from Moose Island.

Oh, yeah. I'll take some. They have, like, Moose Island shirts. I send us Moose Island merchandise from Moose Island. Oh, yeah. I'll take some of that. They have, like, Moose Island shirts. I'll take Moose Island anything. Yeah. Bury me on Moose Island with the other haunted spirits. In sports, the Dolphins beat the Ravens Thursday night. That was a wacky one.

Titans beat the Saints. Bills destroyed the Jets. The Lions and Steelers tied in overtime. Yep. I just want to point out this week, a lot of blowouts, except for the Steelers going against the 0-8 Lions. Unreal. Why am I a Steelers fan?

Yeah, it's pretty sad uh they did have their backup quarterback playing but still it's the lions uh the lions actually missed the game-winning field goal in overtime and then the steelers had the chance to drive down the field and fumbled it with eight seconds to not be able to kick the field goal. And that's how that ended. That sounds right. That sounds absolutely correct. Colts beat the Jaguars. The Washington football team beat the Buccaneers.

The Patriots beat the Browns. The Cowboys beat the Falcons. And currently Panthers are up on the Cardinals 14-0. And other games are happening. Over in basketball, Lakers currently up on the Spurs at halftime. In the standings, the Warriors are atop the West at 11-1, Suns 8-3, Nuggets 8-4, Mavericks 8-4, Clippers 8-4, Jazz 8-5.

Suns have won seven in a row. Oh, Mama mia. Over in the east, you got the Wizards at the top, followed by the Nets and the Bulls, then the Cavaliers, the Heat, and the 76ers. And over in the Hockey Town. Hockey Town. Hockey Town.

You got the Panthers up at the top, the Maple Leafs right behind. You got the Hurricane up at the top, the Maple Leafs right behind. You got the Hurricane up at the top with the Capitals right behind. And at the West, you got the Wild with the Predators and the Jets right behind. And then you got the Oilers up at the top with the Ducks right behind them who have won six in a row, wowee. And let's see. I'm going to check the old

Olympic news just to see how we're looking there it's still coming it's still happening still happening if anything we did just have the Olympics during you know probably a worse time so I mean I can't imagine

it not happening honestly I'm excited for the double Olympic year. I think it's pretty fun. Is it February is when it happens? Yeah, February. So, I mean, I think it's early February. I forgot the Olympics were this year, dude. This year.

Yeah. Oh, my God. I think this has got to be the first time it's ever happened where, like, in the same, like, 12 months we've had winter and summer Olympics. It's got to be the first time it's ever happened where, like, in the same, like, 12 months, we've had Winter and Summer Olympics. It's got to be, right? Because normally they're two years apart. Yeah. I mean, maybe.

I'm sure there was, like, a wartime somewhere that they had to change things. I don't know. Yeah. That's true. There might have been. So, yeah, that's February 4th that starts. Only a couple months away. I like the Winter Olympics more too.

I've said it before, but there's so many wacky sports in Winter Olympics I love. There's like you got the bobsled, you got curling, you got cross country, they're like skiing and then they got like shoot targets and they keep skiing. It's like what's going on? It's good stuff it's it's you know what it is it's like all right canada give us ideas for some reason canada was like oh sure we have plenty of ideas all right we're gonna take this buck and we're gonna like uh sweep it and then i i've got some friends over here across the sea there they uh

they like to shoot while they ski it's like yeah hell yeah um yeah so i uh i i'll bring up what i just saw because this is This is something. So that's sports. Okay. What is our fact of the day? Fact of the day. Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do. France has a dozen time zones.

What? Is that true? I guess so. The country dozen time zones. What? Is that true? I guess so. The country with the widest stretch of land, Russia, spans 11 time zones, but France has 12. What? That's due to the fact. Oh, this is some imperialist BS. All right.

Oh, this is some imperialist BS. All right. French, it counts as French Polynesia, the Marquesas Islands, Gambier Islands, Clipperton Island. Basically, it's all the French territory. Oh, I see. That's dumb. Yeah, that's stupid.

I was like, wait, there's no way. What's going on in Europe? But no, it's all the things France controls. Also throwing another one. Says Dom. Cheetahs don't roar. Yeah, they do like a weird like. Yeah, they can purr, meow, hiss, bark and growl, but they cannot roar. So they're much more like the most cat cats.

You know what I mean? They are the most cat cats. Of big cats, they're the most cat cat. Yeah. So that's pretty neat. And that's your facts. What's our big news story of the day?

So our big news story of the day. First off, let me just say i decided to go to our one of our old stomping grounds oh no cosmo cosmo oh no and it's been too long far too long it has been far too long or maybe not long enough. All right. I found it. The best song to bang to is holding out for a hero from Shrek. I. Holy crap. What makes this amazing?

Not only is that A funny visual Of it's like Hey baby Let me turn off the lights I need a hero Amazing But also That's a cover

Of the original version So the original song Sucks Compared to the Shrek version Which is Frankly one of the most Incredible things

I've ever heard. I love this. How did they discover this information? Uh, I don't know. I guess I'll find out. Let's see. The night I realized holding out for a hero in Shrek

2 is the best song to have sex to is the night my life changed forever. Were they watching Shrek 2 at the time? I guess we'll find out. For context, I've always been a Shrek 2 is the best song to have sex to is the night my life changed forever. Were they watching Shrek 2 at the time? I guess we'll find out. For context, I have always been a Shrek fan. I turn it on often as a means to calm myself down after a hard day. That changes everything.

This is more like a fetish thing now. We're like, I've always been a Shrek fan. I always loved Shrek. That changes the whole dynamic of this. It has all the elements perfect for distraction. A swamp ogre, a donkey, a sexy fairy godmother, a thick Mike Myers accent. Sexy fairy godmother? Is that what they got out of the fairy?

A sexy fairy? That's what they got out of the movie. I wasn't getting that but But one night Alright, yeah, I'm sorry. I keep interrupting this But one night as my girlfriend and I sat on the couch casually enjoying the movie. I found myself getting well casually enjoying the movie, I found myself getting well flustered. Oh, this is a fetish thing. This person. Also, I think it says

something about him that he likes to have sex. The song I Need a Hero. That's like it says a lot. I'm not going to say it's weird. I've done weirder, but it definitely says a lot about you. I found, okay, it was around the 54 minute mark when shrek turned

into human do shrek no what he wore a tight red velvet crop top that made me undeniably horny come on is this is this a a lady or dude? I don't know. Let's see. This is Meggie. So I'm going to say a lady. All right. All right. Okay.

Shrek is an ogre, I thought, trying to rationalize. He's an ogre from a swamp, I thought. Ken? Fighting that urge to be aroused by shrek oh yeah this is one of those things where it's like i think i'm into this and now all right okay the movie continued and i couldn't get shrek out of my mind this can't be real this can't be real oh my my god. As I watched him go on a bender following Fairy Godmother's ultimatum to stay away from Fiona. I can't even read this next part.

I can't even read it. You're gonna have to. You're gonna have to. You have to. I'm just gonna say they quivered with anticipation. They then tugged at the hemline of their girlfriend's pants and said,

Do you want to have sex right now? She looked at me with a smile, knowing damn well Shrek was the reason I was feeling this way. Are you kidding me? She was aware of this? Like, yeah, I do want to have sex with you this shrek is hot is that they knew what was up crazy crazy this article just keeps going i just there's got to be something

in here like okay let's see before diving right in i told my girlfriend we need to wait until the best part of the movie came on when fairy godmother starts her rendition of holding out for a hero this can't be real right this can't be real like i said i don't know how i don't know oh my god so you know how when you're scrolling an article, they bring up other articles for you to read? Yes. Yes. Here's some of them. Quote, here's the story of how I got a vibrator stuck up my butt and had to run to the hospital. You know what?

That's not a story. You pushed it too far. The end. My boyfriend and I role-played killer clowns, and it was the best sex of my life. That is so bizarre okay and a professional ass reader predicted my future after examining my butt i would pay untold sums to have an ass reader examine your butt if i can send you to an ass reader and then you came back with a future prediction of yourself, I would be like money well spent. How do you become an ass reader? Trick idiots to spreading their cheeks and staring at it.

You know, how do I get people? Let me touch their ass? I know, I've become an ass reader. Hello, I am an ass reader. What does my ass say? Let's see. It's a crevice right here. Look, this line, these lines mean that you're going to have a long, healthy life there.

Let's see. I think you work out. All right. You go to the gym often. Wow. How did you know? It's probably because I could just tell you do a lot of squats. Yeah.

Yeah. As I spread your cheeks, they're very firm. No doubt or no doubt or. Anyway, those are other articles. Yep. Shrek, man. That's amazing. Yeah.

You see, I had been waiting for an opportunity my entire life. Watching the scene as a kid, I remember the weakness in my knees, seeing fairy godmother's boobs bouncing everywhere. What the shit is this article this is like a this is from a young age this is like your first thoughts are like wow i can't from a young age i would never be like that fairy godmother though the fairy godmother is the one i just you know what there's someone for everyone out there if anything that's the lesson i'm learning there's someone for everyone yeah this is there's someone for everyone and shrek is definitely not my definition

shrek is super horny this this has to be one of those articles where they're like, just write something wacky and wild to get people to click it. It's got to be. I can't not think that. I guess, man. I guess. Well, that's enough Cosmo for me for the year. Oh, man.

Well, that's enough of this podcast. Nine years, baby. All right. Well, that's enough of this podcast. Nine years, baby! All right. Well, that's it for us. Thanks for listening or watching or enjoying this podcast. Crendor, hit them with the socials. We've got socials, youtube.com slash coxandcrendorpodcast. We've got youtube.com slash coxandcrendor. That's where all the animations are if you just cut off the podcast part.

We're on Spotify. We're on iTunes. We're on SoundCloud. We're all over. Also, follow us on our main stuff. YouTube.com, Jesse Cox. YouTube, Crendor. Twitch.tv, Jesse Cox. Twitch.tv, Crendor. Patreon, Jesse Cox. Patreon, Crendor.

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