Cox n' Crendor Show - Episode 316 - Baby Shark (Do do da do do do)

Episode Date: November 22, 2021

The boys are back and this time Jesse has tales of a mystical adventure in the far away lands of Los Angles. Also - Holidays - why celebrate them!? Meanwhile Crendor discovers evidence that bald eagles are on team Jesse when it comes to sharks. All this and Jesse slowly discovering he likes being bossed around on a brand new Cox n' Crendor! Go to http://hellotushy.com/cox to get 10% off plus free shipping! Go to http://meundies.com/crendor to get 15% off your first order and free shipping!

Hey gang, it's Jesse just up front. So turns out during this episode, my webcam was my auto device input for my voice? I don't know. So my audio quality isn't what it usually is. My bad. But yeah, we didn't notice until after we were done filming. So, you know, we can't redo an episode. It doesn't have the same pizzazz. You know, we can't redo an episode. It doesn't have the same pizzazz. So just, you know, bear with me, and I'll see y'all next episode with improved quality. I promise.

Today's episode is brought to you by Tushy. Tushy's going to take care of your butt. Also today, we're brought to you by MeUndies. MeUndies is going to take care of your butt. All right, that's it. We'll see you in the show. Let's jump in this podcast. Hello, everybody. It's time for Ghost on Trending.

This is Trending in the morning. In the morning. Broadcasting live, live, live, live, live in 4-hour recording studio. Recording. Wake your ass up. It's Ghost on Trending to the audience. Recording. Wake your ass up. It's Cox and Crandall in the morning. Hello there, everybody.

Welcome to a sunny episode of Cox and Crandall in the morning. Hey, hello there, everybody. Welcome, Cox and Crandall in the morning. Hey, hello there. Hey, hello there is a weird. Hey, hello there. Hey, hello there. Welcome to Cox and Crandor in the morning. Alo there. Alo there is a weird... Alo there. Alo there. Welcome to Gagrid Beer. Well, hello.

How are you? How was your week? What's going on? Alo there. Oh, no. Alright, so you became a robot, but like, not a functioning one. That sounds about right. Alo there. I mean, I'm doing pretty good.

You know, just living, living, living. Sounds so exciting. Sounds like every day for you is an adventure. It's getting colder and darker now, so it's starting to get a little hibernation weather. But that ain't stopping me from going to the gym, still doing my cardio, still doing my weights. Does the early darkness affect your day-to-day? Are you kind of like down by 6 p.m.? I guess, I don't know.

Do you even see the sun anymore? What is your schedule like? Yeah, I mean, I wake up at probably around noon. So you get a good... Do you not feel effects from only getting four, five hours of sun a day? I mean, not really. I mean, that's like all I need. Do you not have seasonal depression?

Not really. I mean, I kind of like when it gets colder. I don't like when it gets cold, cold. Like when it gets into the teens, maybe the low 20s. But 40 degrees, it's like nothing. Do you not want to just stay in bed all day? No. I wake up.

I'm like, dude, all right, let's get this day rolling. So I get up, get my coffee, eat my oatmeal. And I'm like, all right all right gotta go to the gym uh gotta get this done gotta do this thing and then later i'll make a video later i'll stream and then you know get out you know get some sun i don't need like you know like an hour maybe i don't know how you do it i can't figure out how you pull it off i honest to god i will if it's 50 degrees outside i'll just be like, what if I just stay in bed all day today? That'd be great.

50? You know, 50. 50 or less. Because it's so hot here all the time. When the temperature drops or if it rains, oh my god. I'm like, what if i didn't do anything oh my god my whole body is like just in hibernation mode now when it gets i'd say 55 degrees with rain that's my most energized weather i get like i wake up i'm like dude it's like 55 it's raining

i'll like look outside like yeah and then i like you I go out, I want to go to the gym, you know, I'll like look out at the rain while I'm working out. So what else have you been doing besides making me fear cold weather? Um, yeah, I don't know. Uh, let's see. Well, I'll even like go walking outside. Like even if it's like f 50s and raining, as long as there's not a downpour, I'll go walking. I love it. And so, it was high 40s the other day. Okay, the bad part is the wind. If it's windy, okay, that's going to be like,

I don't want to go out in that. But no wind, easy. I can go out in 30s, no wind. In fact, I was wearing... Yeah, because the wind chill, though, right? Yeah, you get the wind chill. That's a no-go but like even when i go to the gym like uh you know i'm wearing short sleeves you know and then especially oh my god when you're done working out and you go out there it's like your blood's pumping like you're just feeling it like everything's like and so like

you know people might be walking in coats i'm just walking out short sleeves and it's just like yeah it just feels good i love that i i i haven't been that way for years the last time i did the old like white dude in shorts in the snow thing was 2003 so i have not lived that life for some time well i don't wear shorts. I still wear sweatpants. Ah, but you have short sleeves on. I have short sleeves on, yeah. Understood.

Okay. Yeah. It's sweatpants season. No doubt. Honestly, I'm either wearing shorts in the summer or sweatpants literally just for the entirety of winter. Maybe a little fall in there. Maybe even a little early spring. You know, that's just what I do. I like it. My thing is I don't

like sweating. So I'd rather be cold than sweat. Because sweating just makes you more cold. I do agree. Other sometimes, like... No, I agree. No, never mind. Sweating always sucks. It's never cool.

Although, I guess it's, never mind. Sweating always sucks. It's never, like, cool. Although, I guess it's a natural body function that does cool you off, so it is pretty cool. It is pretty cool, literally. But only when it's, like, hot. Once it gets colder, I'm like, nah. But if it's, like, super cold or there's wind or whatever, then I'll put a coat on or something or wear, like, a hoodie. But, let's see uh i wrote down two things that i heard while walking outside uh one was uh target there's a woman that was walking out of

target and she said and i quote i put nothing up no christmas, no Halloween, no nothing. She sounds like a woman after my own heart, if anything. I put nothing up. Yeah, but I feel like you've got to put something up. I put nothing up. Why? No Christmas, no Halloween, no nothing. Why do you choose to put nothing up? Because that means I have to store stuff.

I don't have any kids I have to appease. I don't have, like, a spouse who's like, hey, what if we crochet something? Like, I don't have any of that. I have no need. I do have some things from when I was a child that are Christmas related that could go on a tree if I wanted to. are Christmas related that could go on a tree if I wanted to. Years ago, some of the old Coxconn gang made me an ornament. Actually, it's several little tiny ornaments that I still keep because that was very sweet.

But everything else, I have one stocking, and it's a fan made me a Jesse stocking. And in that stocking, everything else is stored, and that's all I have. And I don't even hang it. I just keep it in storage just because it exists, and I love it. But I have no need to put up a tree. I did that a few years back, and I was like, why did I do this?

Who is this for? It's not for me. What the hell do I care? And at the office, no one here cares. Bring a tree and then it's like, all right, cool. Welcome to the office. Get to work. You know, like, yes, don't.

So I got, you know, there's no one I have to please with holiday stuff. And everyone else can hang mistletoes and wreaths and trees and pumpkins and skeletons and shit. And I'll just like, that sounds like a crazy holiday. Pumpkins and skeleton and trees and wreaths. It's the Nightmare Before Christmas. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Jinx.

And, uh, I don't know. I just don't see the need for it. I mean, it's not bad. At least in my life. In your life, it probably would be lovely. Yeah, well, it's not like it's a need for it. I mean, at least in my life, in your life, it probably would be lovely. Yeah. Well, it's not like it's a need for it. I mean,

for me, I just think it's fun to like, you know, mix things up and you like go, you'll festive. You like a different environment. You like the lights from the tree and, uh,

you know, you play some other lights all around. It gives you a little atmosphere. I'm all about lights all year, which means I have to have a closet space designed for the lights that I need for the tree. Nah, I'm good.

It's like, it's the atmosphere. It's the environment. Nah, I'm alright. I feel like I'm much more affected by my surroundings environment stuff than you are. Well, you have an environment and surroundings i have one one temperature all year long everything looks the same it never changes

i don't need i'm like fine i don't need to be reminded of the winter chill i feel like that would give me seasonal depression so you're just stuck in the one warm season. It's like you got hot and less hot. Well, at night it gets chilly, so that's like pretty cold. It's not like cold, cold. It's like, ooh, it's a little brisk out. Maybe I'll put on my windbreaker. Like, whatever. Yeah, I love that.

It limits the stuff I have to have in my closet. I'm coming to Chicago for our live show December 12th. That is true. And I was like, boy, do I even have a heavy coat? I do. I have one. It's been in my closet and I've worn it

once in the last three years. I'm ready. I'm ready to go. What about your environment in general? Do you feel your mood change if your environment's cluttered or stuff? Yes, the more cluttered it is, the more stuff, the more stressed out I become. All right, that does add up.

Oh, I very much have that problem. We're like if there's two if I go to a place that's too much stuff or is like um I've definitely dated a few people that they like Live in a messy sort will say and it is like Overwhelming for me. I actively feel ill being around like piles of they're just I'm gonna I'm sure it's lovely things that mean a lot to them, but to me. I'm like that's trash. That's trash You're just keeping your storing trash in your home. What are you doing? Why do you have 18 issues of Reader's Digest from 1984? What is the purpose?

Never knowing you might need them. Yeah, and I was like, no. Those got to go. Yeah, I finally started doing like organizing and cleaning. It's like it even bothers me if there's like boxes of stuff. And I'm just like, I don't mind if there's a box of stuff as long as I know what's in it. I'm like, OK, that box has like these things. Like there's a box that like batteries, but also like a bunch of like tools and like nails and like screws and shit in it.

And I'm like, all right, I'm going to go through this box. And then I just literally made it the battery box. I'm like, this can be batteries. And I'll put the tools and like another thing and I'm like alright I'm gonna go through this box and then I just literally made it the battery box I'm like this can be batteries and I'll just put the tools and like another thing and throw the other shit out and that's what I did I was like dude this feels great I wonder if there's a lesson to be learned there for keeping like there's probably like a balance

you know what I mean like of keeping things and getting rid of stuff I do not have that I'm like do I use this at all have I used this in the last year no alright I'm getting rid of it even this at all? Have I used this in the last year? No? All right, I'm getting rid of it. Even if it's something that, like, maybe in the future I'll probably need.

I'm like, no, no, I don't. I'll use my hands. Like, what if I get rid of stuff? This picture you tried to put a, like, nail in the wall. You're like, I'll use my hands. You just, like, form a hammer with your fist. You're just like, eh. Yeah. I mean, well, I do have a hammer.

I'm not dumb. Like, I have a hammer with your fist you're just like yeah i mean well i do have i do have a hammer i'm not dumb like i have a hammer i have that drawer and you know the drawer in the kitchen that's filled with all the things you need like nail stuff um and i have a drill and i have things that i would need if i needed to move from my apartment i'm not when i move i'm not moving with like a crew. I'm not, I don't have a family that it's me. It is literally just me. And so I've do all of it. And let me tell you, moving by yourself is bullshit. It sucks. So rather than be like, Hey friends, do you want to help come help me move? I'm not going to do that. I'm never going to do that. Cause that's how then they're like, you want to help me move? And I will tell them no. So it's unfair. So I don't want anyone to help me. So I'm just by myself. I don't want to bring my parents along. I love my parents, but oh my God, the idea of moving with them seems like the worst day I can

imagine. It would be so stressful. And my parents, I guarantee they're listening right now. And they'll be like, but Jesse, it would be like, imagine, mom, dad, imagine if you had to move with your mom and dad, what that would be like. Terrible. So, it's, you know, it's nothing against parents. It's just, that's what it is. And so I'll just do it myself. But I've realized the more I do it myself, the more I'm just like, oh boy, I have a lot of stuff. And a lot of the stuff I don't use or need, it just sits on a shelf and looks at me. And I feel like I need it, but like I don't. So why the hell am I lugging 18 boxes of trash

from one apartment to another when I can just get rid of it? And now holidays are the same thing. Holidays fit in the same category. Do I need that holiday? Not really. It's out. It's gone. This holiday has been removed from my life.

You're like the classy Grinch. Yeah, yeah. It's not that I don't like holidays. I love a good holiday. In fact, I love celebrating holidays. Do I personally want to be responsible for the celebration of it? No. I'll show up to your celebration.

I'll be like, Merry Christmas, Happy New Year, oh, a lovely Halloween, or Fourth of July, or St. Patrick's Day, or whatever to you. But do I, in my mind, invite you over to my house to celebrate? Hell no. That's why, if I marry someone who is like, oh, well, I'm into that, fine. You can handle that shit. I'll be over here not handling it. If you need my help, I'll gladly help. But I don't want to be responsible. You tell me what needs to get done, I'll do it.

But I'm not going to be like, and here's my plan. We make little cupcakes, and on the top, the icing is green. St. Patrick's Day. But also, in the winter, we can make a little tree out of it. It's for Christmas, too. Nah, hell no. I don't want to be a part of that. Just tell me what's ice.

Just point me in the right. I've learned I'm a much better follower. Just tell me what you need to get done, and I'll do it. Jesse Cox, follower. It's true. I went to, so on Friday night, I got invited to this event in L.A. for the show Arcane, which is on Netflix. It's a League of Legends show. It is way better than it has any right to be based on League.

It's very, very good. And so I'm, like, in love with the show. I got invited to code this thing that is Secret Cinema. And I don't know if you know what Secret Cinema is. It's kind of like a cooler, more immersive version of a renaissance fair. Oh. That only lasts two to three hours, which is great. And they do it all over the place.

They've done it for, oh my God. They're doing one right now for Ghostbusters. They did one for Stranger Things. I know in London they did one for Moulin Rouge. They're like, you know, it's basically you go there assigned as a character. And then you that night are that character in that world. And you do little objectives and things, right? And so it's, in this case, I went to this event

and it was like, okay, you can either be a cop or you can be a gang member from the undercity. And I was like, oh, I'm a gang member, let's go. And of course it was like really immersive and very cool. And it's like you're underground in this sort of dank city

beneath the streets kind of vibe. And all the different characters from Arcane are there. And then other characters that are gang members of people. And then there are people, normal idiots like me, who are like, ooh, this is nice. And it was a lot of media, so there was a lot of people filming with their cameras and stuff, which also, I think, took a lot out of it.

Because you're not supposed to film at all. But for that night only, you could film. So there was a lot of moments where two characters would get in a fight, and then instead of people being like, oh, people just pulled out their phones and started videotaping it, which is funny, because I was doing the same thing. I'm no dummy. So I started doing it, too. But there was drinks, and there was little fun events you could get involved with.

Anyway, the whole point of this being connected to me being a follower is that when I got there, they assigned me to a gang and my gang was called the Slick Jaws. And I was like, oh, hell yes. And I get there and the girl who is the leader of my part of the gang, because each gang had like four units, and each unit was competing with each other to see who could get the most shimmer, which is like drugs, you know what I mean? Right. And we had to avoid the police, defeat the other gangs, and whoever won got the favor of Silco, who's like the big boss in town.

And so the girl who was in charge of my branch of the Slick Jaws literally looked like 2012 Dodger. It was uncanny. And so the entire time, as our group was forming, she was getting to know everyone's name so that she could give out the orders. She's like, what's your special skill? What do you do? She got to me and she's like, what's your name? I'm like, why should I tell you like what's your special skill what do you do she got to me and she's like what's your name i'm like why should i tell you she's like what do you mean why should you tell me what's your name you want to be in this gang and i was like i don't trust you enough yet what's your name and she was like i don't need to tell

you my name who do you i'm with the slick jaws i'm in charge here and i was like well then i gotta give you my name she's like fine i'm calling you'm calling you Gumby. I was like, all right. And she's like, all right, Gumby, if you want to earn your keep here, you're going to need to distract that guard over there so we can break into this building. And for anyone who's seen Arcane, the first episode has a break-in, and that's literally what we were doing. We were doing that break-in into, like, a lab with some cool equipment, and it was an escape room inside. So once you broke in, you had to solve the escape room.

And then, you know, I'm not going to spoil it. It was pretty neat. Right. But the cop was, like, standing right by it. And she's like, all right, Gumby, distract that cop. Like, fine, I'll do it. I turn around to go distract the cop. And the cop, like, I guess it was his real-life break.

I don't know what. He stood up and just left. So I turned back around to her distract the cop, and the cop, like, I guess it was his real-life break. I don't know what. He stood up and just left. So I turned back around to her and was like, done. She's like, you're good, Gumby. You're very good. It was amazing. And so all night, she and I were just, like, giving each other a hard time. And so she would tell me to do things, and without question, Crandor, I would do them.

She'd be like, all right, I need you to go over there and talk to the person at the bar and give them this piece of paper. Don't look at the paper. Give it to them, and you're going to get some, like, illegal narcotics for us. And I was like, okay, what do I do with those narcotics, boss? She's like, all right, what do you got to do? He's got to drop it off at this point over here, and then we're going to meet. And I was like, on it, boss. I was like all night doing missions that weren't real missions,

but missions for this girl that was basically 2012 Dodger. I had so much fun just following orders of a thing that was insane. She's like, all right, that guy over there, he's causing a lot of trouble for me. I need you to go talk to him and see if you can dig up any information. I was like, on it, boss. And so I went over to this guy, and it was like another actor. And he's like, what do you want?

I was like, hey, man, I hear you got a hookup on that shimmer out there. And he was like, maybe I do. I'm like, look, I'll do whatever it takes, man, to get some of that. And he's like, whatever it takes? I'm like, whatever it takes, man. What do you need? What do you need? And he's like, I need you to go break into this place i'll do it so i'm like rigging open a lock on a door in like a corner of a room someone it was amazing and i was like this

is so much fun i am i loved every minute of it but it was because i bought into like i am a low level gang member following orders and i realized realized, frankly, I love following orders. I love being told what to do because I'm like, all right, I'll do that. And I don't know why. I was like, yes, I will do that. And maybe it's just, I think we've talked about this before. Maybe it's because just being the person in charge for 10 years is a lot. And so being able to turn off the

what do we do next switch and just have someone else tell me what to do, even if it's mostly scripted things, I was like, oh this is so good. All I do is just what I'm told. Yeah, and I was a good trustworthy gang member. It was great. I also realized that Riot has more money

than God. Oh yeah. But, so like this Secret Cinema thing is with Secret Cinema and Riot. It's an event. It's like two or so, three hours. But then, after that was over, a door opened. And I guess while we were in there doing that, there was a whole other area where League of Legends influencers were hanging out and playing all the new Riot games that existed that they just announced. And there was a league tournament and all these different things. And then behind all of that was a giant ass bar and then a street that was set up to be like an

alleyway in Piltover. And it was like every food you could think of had a stall. Every drink, and when I say every drink, I mean every drink. They literally had a drink stand that made smoked whiskey. Oh my God.

They had like a weird pizza place that was like, hey, come on, get your pizza. I was mesmerized by this whole thing. At a certain point, the best part of the night, is at a certain point, a guy taps me on the shoulder. He's like, hey, man, can I interview you? And I was like, uh, sure.

I have no idea what it's for. Still don't know what it's for. But this huge camera crew gathers around, and the first question out of their mouth was, all right, so what's your main champion? Krendle, you know I don't play League at all. You know me. I was like, well, it's so hard to choose.

I mean, you should have just picked someone from the show or something. Well, I didn't want to do that. And so the guy's like, well, you know, how often do you play? And I was like, well, I'm undefeated. And he's like, what do you mean? He's like, I've played once and won and have never played since. And he was like, oh. And you could tell everyone there was like, oh, no.

So they started asking me about the show, and I at least know what I'm talking about there. But it was pretty funny. They were like, so who's your favorite champion? I was like, he started off on the wrong foot, my man. He was the wrong guy. I think they were like, oh, fat beardarded Dude, he's definitely a League player. They were totally wrong.

Meanwhile, you know, going on my 12th year of League of Legends. Great stuff. If you ever traveled, they gave me a plus one. I took nobody. I went by myself. But instead, I played League of Legends at home. Ever since I got to Plat, I haven't played as intensely.

So that's been nice. I just played some normals. Although we've been doing some Clash. That's been fun. So we make a five-man team. So it's been me, Gmart, Lawman, Pluto. And usually we'll fit in a fifth. It was supposed to be Sam yesterday.

And he's like, oh, I'm playing Pokemon. And we're like, what? So we had to get Zeus, who's another dude. We won two games, lost our championship round. And you get some skins. So it's pretty fun. But yeah, Heimerdinger main. Live or die by the ding. i guess trundle jungle i get i uh i find it hilarious that like now i know what you're

talking about because heimerdinger's in the show so i like know what you mean now when you say that to me before it was gibberish now i'm like oh i recognize that i mean you recognize the character be you know you're yes but at least i know more of what you're talking about than before which was like ah he's saying words that is true uh i know there's probably a lot of people getting into League now because of the show. And so all I can say is just welcome the endless torture. But, you know, after a while, it's a pretty fun pain. I love when Sam plays League and everyone's like, dude, you want to play something else? And he's just like, no. Like, his chat tries to get him to not play.

I'm like, you're not getting this man off this drug. He's hooked yeah it's like not for me but that's all right i love it i love it even when even the losses even everything you're just you're just like let's play again like i said it's like when we talked about league that one time it's just it's a it's a drug but i love that drug top tier well apparently they're talking about making an MMO or something. That's going to be weird. I think they're literally making every type of game you can make. Oh, yes, they are. Yeah.

If they're like, we have 140 characters, I'm sure they can create something with it all. Also, I wrote down another quote I was gonna mention earlier sorry uh here's a quote uh woman standing by her car you could have just bought the frozen fucking turkey i don't give a shit those are some people going through it though like you know you know they probably spent too much money on like a fresh turkey and was like, what does it matter? Oh, yeah, that's Thanksgiving woes. Again, why I don't bother.

My Thanksgiving, my parents are going out to eat. That's Thanksgiving. That's great. Y'all are doing too much. Like, I made a turkey. Like, get out of here. Well, we are cooking Thanksgiving and making a turkey. You're doing too much.

Is it just the two of you or is it your family? That's our family too. Oh, well how many family people? So there's like seven of us. Well see, alright, so there's seven total. That's a lot of people. That's turkey people, right? If it's me and my parents, nah.

Even if it was dating someone and I was with my parents, I would be like, nah, we ain't cooking. There's no reason. I like cooking, though. I'm like the food douche. So I'm a big, like, dude, we're going to make some fancy stuff. But at the same time, my dad's just like, I want Campbell's gravy. I'm just like, all right, let's pour it into the thing. Just want the Campbell's gravy.

That's like my mom when it comes to cranberry sauce. Oh, yeah. There's like a million types of actual fresh cranberry sauce out there. She's like, from the can. I want it to come out looking like the can it was in. Yeah. No, that's also my dad. He's just like, where's the can, Cranberry?

I'm like, we literally just made the Gordon Ramsay Cranberry recipe. It's not the same. Like orange zest and everything. He's just like, it's not in the shape of a can. Yeah, it comes out looking like the can, and it's cut into pieces that are like round circles. It's just like, is that what you like? I just, I don't understand't understand who am i to judge i i tell people to eat a mcrib with an apple pie on top of it so what the hell what the hell can i say that is true yeah i mean i had my last week i had my one mcrib of the year how was it it was actually pretty good so i was like like, nice. Now I definitely don't

have to eat another one. Yeah, you're good for another 12 months. Yeah, exactly. I mean, some of the other menu items I could just get whenever. Like the McCrocks or the McCrendor. You know, it's Big Mac and a McChicken.

You get that year-round. Man, what did we create last time? I already forgot. I know that it had to do with a shamrock shake. Yeah, it was a shamrock shake with coffee in it or something. Oh, yeah! You get a coffee halfway, and then you pour the shamrock shake in that coffee. Oh, my God.

Although some people are like, that's already a thing. Yeah, but it's not from McDonald's. Yeah, it's not a McDonald's thing. Yeah. They use apples and pork all the time, but it's not a McDonald's thing. Exactly. We're trying to upscale McDonald's

for y'all. Yeah. You're welcome. Yeah, you're welcome. If you do anything else this week. You're welcome. Yeah, you're welcome. Yeah, you're welcome. Me? Yeah. Nah. The most fun thing I did was Friday when I went out and did that thing.

That was neat. I was really impressed by how they pulled it all off and was like, oh, I love this kind of stuff. So maybe I would love a Renaissance fair if it if it was like you know, people actually acted like they were from the renaissance instead of like hello me lord, would you like to buy me wares? There's none of that. There's none of that in this thing. This thing was like

an event where you went from like escape room to challenge to like, you saw a fight break out. So like you were at the bar drinking and then like a scene would take place and then you know there was like plot things from the show happening around you that was neat like that kind of stuff i was like oh that's cool um yeah most renaissance fair stuff at least from what i've seen is just like i dressed up like a pirate and i'm at the

renaissance fair taking photos like that, that sucks. That's not fun. I'm sure people love it, but for me, I'm like, oh, so you're just like cosplaying and like drinking mead. Cool. Yeah, it's still pretty fun. I guess. It's still pretty fun. I mean, I still haven't

gone. We're going to have to do a summer excursion. Yeah, we've got to do a summer excursion. Yeah. We've got to do a summer show, and you can see it in the flesh. You can see the mud show happen live. I will plan our next show around when the Mud Brothers are in town. Very good. That's pretty much the whole summer. We're going to send the Mud Brothers to the show, and they can be our opening act.

An hour-long Mud Brothers show. And then we come out for like five minutes. Those were the Mud Brothers. All right, thanks for coming, everybody. Bye. Well, speaking of Mud Brothers, boy, this is a transition. Let's talk about Tushy.

Yep. You did it. I did it. Oh, my goodness. Hey, are you buying a lot of toilet paper for your family members? Right? Are you dealing with just the number of ways to wipe your butt? So many ways.

They got the wipes and stuff. No, no, no. They got the wipes and stuff. Nah, nah, nah. Hello Tushy is the bidet for you. We actually had a person message us on Twitter being like, Bruh, I went and got it and it's great. That's because they are great.

I don't understand why they're the way they are. I don't get how America isn't like up on this thing, but the rest of the world is. And Hello Tushy is here to make it so that you can get in on this clean bum technology as well. Hello Tushy washes your bum with fresh water for a way better clean than toilet paper.

You simply spray and pat it dry. Attaches to your existing toilet. No electrician or plumber is even needed. It installs in less than eight minutes. They've timed it. Cuts down your toilet paper use by 80%, saving you money and paper waste. And if you have a big family,

I know that's a big part of your budget because all them peoples be poopin'. Make the restroom your best room with complete Tushy system, including the Tushy bidet, ottoman, toilet brush, and Tushy stand and tissues. Join the millions of happy, hello Tushy customers right now

who take care of their Yule logs the dignified way. See, even the ad is goofy. That's how I likes it. Give the gift of a clean bum this holiday season to yourself or to your loved ones and get 10% off plus free shipping right now at

hellotushy.com slash cox. That's hellotushy.com slash cox for 10% off and free shipping. And hey, again, if you're going to tweet at us and say you got it like that one dude, hey, by the way, thank you, just also include at HelloTushy so they know that it's us. And then they'll be like, ooh, these guys like to take care of the butt. And then I will proudly admit I am a butt guy.

That's true. What are we talking about? HelloTushy. Yep. 10% off., Tushy. Yep. 10% off. Hello, Tushy.com slash Cox. Also today, we're brought to you by me, undies. Me.

Undies are the undies that I have on me. The holidays are here. It's time to just hang out with family. Don't make dinner. And more importantly, deliver excellent, excellent gifts to your loved ones. And that's what it's about. It's the season of giving. And me undies is the perfect gift.

Not just the undies. Onesies, loungewear, PJs. As we were talking about at the beginning, it's, you know, it's that cozy season. The temperature's going down. Me, I turn into hibernation mode and I like a good cozy outfit, especially some loungewear, let me tell you. With new classic plaid and holiday sweater prints, MeUndies is turning up the comfy this holiday season. Their undies, loungewear, sleepwear are made of soft, breathable, stretchy fabrics that are ideal for getting cozy by the fire with a hot cup of cocoa.

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Looking for more inspiration? Check out their holiday gift guide for all things cozy and comfy. MeUndies has an offer for you. Same offer they've always had because, frankly, it's a good one. If you're a first-time purchaser, you can get 15% off and free shipping right to your door. You don't have to go out. You don't have to, like, look for underwear at a store anywhere. You can just get it at MeUndies. 15% off your first order, free shipping.

100% satisfaction guarantee. If you aren't happy, they got you covered. MeUndies.com slash Crendor is the place to be. MeUndies.com slash Crendor. That's me. All right, let's jump to chapter number seven with this guy with Crendor.

How's that traffic out there? Traffic out there is moving. You got cars, planes, trains, and automobiles. They are going here and there. They are preparing for the holiday season and this sounds like one of those old-timey film things. Oh, trains, planes, automobiles. These are the things that move society. Now, through the power of 1950s steam, we can propel locomotives to do what they do best. 1950s steam?

This steam has been harnessed by true 1950s plants, the greatest plants known to mankind. Also, traffic's pretty crazy. Back to you. Thanks, Grendor. 1950 Steam. I have a feeling that you're off about 100 years, but yeah, okay. No, no. 1850 Steam wasn't quite there. 1950s really renovated. It took 100 years, but they really harnessed the awesome power of Steam.

That's when they got it done. Right. Yeah. I think that's Hamilton. Steam. It gets the job done. I think that's part of it. Okay.

Let's go to weather. Okay. Weather time. Weather time. Okay. We have a weather request for the longest place name in Wales. It is called. They just want us to try and say this word.

Oh, boy. Yes. it is called they just want us to try and say this word yes that sounds right I'm sure there's a clip of someone on the internet saying it correctly and I'm sure we're way off yeah there it is

wow yeah correctly and I'm sure we're way off. Yeah, there it is. Wow. Yeah. Gwyn Gilgogori Siligogogogok. Maybe. They're going to say it like Gwyn Gilgogori It's going to be something like that.

Yes. I've definitely heard there's a YouTube clip For sure Of a weather reporter Pronouncing it 100% I know this for sure Oh yeah, there is

I see it right here Google it yourself It's like Go, go, go That sounds like a cast in a spell Yeah Go, go, go. That sounds like casting a spell. Yeah. Well, let's check the weather there.

Of course, we're going to be using the American weather system. 44 degrees Fahrenheit. You got partly cloudy, only one mile an hour wind gusts. Not too bad. Tonight, it's going to be 41. Few clouds, low 41. Winds northeast at 10 to 20 miles an hour wind gusts. Not too bad. Tonight, it's going to be 41. A few clouds, low 41. Winds northeast at 10 to 20 miles an hour. Tomorrow, high of 49.

Partly cloudy skies, high of 49. 5 to 10 mile an hour winds from the north. Tomorrow night, Monday night, 75% chance of rain. A few showers in the evening, starting steady. Going over at night, 80% chance of rain over at night. in the evening starting steady. Going over at night, 80% chance of rain over at night. It gets a little crazier. Then, additional conditions. 30.4 inches

of pressure. 10 miles of visibility. 35 on the dew point. 67% humidity. And we got ourselves a waning gibbous moon. Checking the 10-day. You've got mail.

Is that my 10-day forecast? That's accurate, the most accurate I've ever received. That's true. 50 on Tuesday, 48 Wednesday, both with rain. Thursday, no rain, but very windy at 45 then you got your rain 46 rain 45 rain 45 rain 49

rain 48 so a lot of rain and a lot of cool temperatures yeehaw alright let's go to sports temperatures. Yeehaw. All right. Let's go to sports.

Sports. Welcome to the sports desk. We have sports. Yes. Yeah. You didn't sound confident at all. Well, you never know. Sometimes you got sports, sometimes you don't.

Patriots beating the Falcons. Ravens beating the Bears. Vikings beat the Packers. Sad times. Colts destroyed the Bills. That was a bad one. Browns barely beat the Lions. Washington beat the Panthers.

Texans beat the Titans somehow. 49ers beat the Jaguars. Dolphins beat the Jets. Eagles beat the Lions. Washington beat the Panthers. Texans beat the Titans somehow. 49ers beat the Jaguars. Dolphins beat the Jets. Eagles beat the Saints. Bengals currently beating the Raiders. Chiefs currently beating the Cowboys and the Cardinals. Currently beating the Seahawks. You got Steelers, Chargers tonight. Giants, Buccaneers tomorrow. Over in basketball. Currently playing. Clippers are beating the Mavericks in the fourth quarter. Later, we got Lakers, Pistons, Knicks, Bulls, Nuggets, Suns, and Raptors. Warriors, a look at the standings.

We got the Nets at the top with the Wizards, Bulls, and Heat right behind. In the West, you got the Warriors at the top with the Suns and the Jazz right behind. Then we go take a look at the NHL standings. Panthers up the top. You got Hurricanes up the top. Capitals right behind. You got the Wild and the Jets tied at the top. And you got the Oilers up the top with the Flames right behind.

And that is the sports. Okay. What's our fact of the day? If you're looking for a fact of the day, let me tell you. I am. I'm here for it. I've got you a fact that's going to make you go, what? What?

You haven't said it yet. I can't say what. Exactly. It's going to make you say what? All right. I can't say what. Exactly. It's going to make you say what. Alright, I'm waiting. A human could swim through a blue whale's veins. Yo. I mean, I guess I have to believe that because they're so big.

Yeah. You would die, though, but like, if you're wild, you could do it, I guess. That is true. You could do it. What kind of human? Like a child human? Let's find out. The blue whale's largest living creature. It's even larger than most dinosaurs. The biggest blue whales

can be over 100 feet in length and weigh more than 100 tons. Their hearts alone can weigh 1,300 pounds and are the size of a small car. Unsurprisingly, blue whales have enormous arteries which pump blood through their massive hearts into their vital organs.

These are so big that a fully grown human can swim through them. I mean, that's pretty neat, admittedly. Yeah. Actually, it was a really cool fact. It's an insane fact. It's a fact that does not matter, but that concept is cool. Yeah, it's like magic school bus. Yes, exactly.

The idea of shrinking down and going through someone's body is always cool. And this is like you don't even have to shrink down, bro. Yeah, you're literally primed and ready to go. So yeah, that's a cool fact of the day. Look at that. Yeah, look at that. Look at that. All right, what's our big news story of the day?

Big news story of the day? Big news story of the day. Big, big news. Bald Eagle swoops in to steal Florida Man Shark. What the? Okay, there are layers. I'm always here for a good layered story. Yep, here we go. With sunset on the horizon, Chad Wiseman.

Why did they start it like this? It was a dark and stormy night. It was the best of times. It was the worst of times. Chad Wiseman and his uncle Darren Vick had waited all day for one bite. We're just sitting there talking. Line got tight and slack, Darren recalled. With that nibble, they reeled in an unforgettable fishing pail.

I was reeling it in. My uncle was going to grab the line, Chad said. As the leader is coming up, I said I'd get a hold of the shark darren continued but before darren could continue a bald eagle swept in and claimed the shark as its own the way everything lined up the sun said i couldn't have even asked for a better time said chad the family grabbed their phones and captured the moment on the dunedin Causeway. The Dunedin Causeway? That's Lord of the Rings. That's what I had.

I was like... The Dunedin? That's Lord of the Rings, the Dunedin. Take the Dunedin Causeway. Orcs patrol the Dunedin Highway. You must beware, Frodo Baggins. And then there's like an 18-minute shot of them running. That's not an orc.

That's a man on methamphetamines. I guess you're right. Still watch out. It's just like brushing the greatness of the country all into one picture and one experience. They cut the line short and got the line and hook away from the eagle. I think they did a great job. Could have been a lot worse. Oh, wait.

Could have been a lot worse, said Kim Begway with the Clearwater Audubon Society for Birds of Prey. Here is the man, the myth, the legend that caught it. Where is this guy? I don't see him yet. Yeah. That dude, here's the thing. looks like he could be my family he kind of does yeah that guy is 100 of cocks i don't care what his last name is that guy's a cocks he also looks like he'd be uh his name would

be like uncle chad even though i'm out the man has a Jimmy Johns hat on. Jimmy Johns. Uncle Jim Cox. Jim Cox. Jimmy John Cox. That's my boy. Let's see. Begay knows that Eagle as Eugene first rescued in Bradenton in 2017 after fracturing her leg.

First time she broke her leg, she was in rehab for about eight months. She was in rehab at a very critical time, and she would be learning how to hunt and following her parents' hunt. Eugene appears to now be looking for easy meals. If Eugene or any other bird is hooked, Begay says to follow these steps. If you hook a bird by accident or the bird has line wrapped around them, don't cut the line, leaving the bird with long amounts of line trailing. You have to reel, remove, and release.

If not, a bird can end up in serious trouble. If you aren't comfortable getting the hook out on your own, call the Raptor Center. What? Yeah, because that's a bird. that's a raptors i guess you're right the worst thing that could happen is for the eagle fly away with a hook inside of her and trailing line of 15 20 feet because she when she perches on things she could end up hanging herself jesus uh for eugene and chad it was just another chance encounter. I used to identify as a Utah man, but I'm definitely a Florida man, smiled Chad. I mean, I'm looking at the picture.

It checks out. He's not wrong. It does check out. That's Uncle Jimmy John Cox. Jimmy John Cox? He caught a shark? Here's the thing. It's a baby shark.

It is a baby shark. It's like a little tiny baby shark. I was wondering how an eagle swooped down and was like, you're my jaws. But I will say, what's more American than an eagle killing a shark? Frankly, that's proof of God's providence over this great nation of ours. That eagle killed a shark. That's America. And that's our show.

That's it, everybody. Thanks so much for tuning in or listening or having enjoyed this podcast. Crendor, hit them with the socials. We've got socials. YouTube.com slash Cox and Crendor podcast. Over on YouTube. You can find all the episodes there. You can also find us on Spotify,

iTunes, SoundCloud if you search Cox and Crendor. Also, if you do youtube.com slash Cox and Crendor, instead of adding the podcast on the end, you'll find all the funny ha-ha animations. Also, you can follow our own stuff where youtube.com Jesse Cox,

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Facebook Crendor. Instagram Notorious Cox. Instagram Crendor was taken. And yo, yo, yo. Okay. We'll see you next time. And as always always to be continued