Cox n' Crendor Show - Episode 364 - 10 Years Of This

Episode Date: November 21, 2022

It's been 10 years from the first day Jesse and Eric sat down the record their very first podcast. And now all these years later, as they look back, they can say with complete certainty - THAT WE REALLY SUCKED AT THIS. But not just podcasts, Crendor is convinced he was awful 10 years ago. Meanwhile Jesse is the exact same. And of course to celebrate 10 years we take it back and once again revisit the old staple of the podcast - Cosmo. All this and so much more on a brand new Cox n' Crendor! Go to http://calm.com/cox for 40% off unlimited access to Calm’s entire library. Go to http://joinhoney.com/cox to get Honey for free. Go to http://hellotushy.com/cox to save big on gifts!

Today's episode is brought to you by Calm. Calm is going to get you relaxed and feeling good. Also, today we're brought to you by Honey. Honey's going to save you money online. And we're also brought to you by Tushy. Hello, Tushy, looking out for your butt. Now let's jump into this podcast. Hello, everybody. It's time for Ghost on Trend Dog. Ghost on Trend Dog in the morning. In the morning. Broadcasting live, live, live, live, live. Hello everybody and welcome to another episode of Gags and Crandor in the morning.

Hello. Hello. Hello. Welcome to another episode of Kax and Krendor in the morning. Hello. Hello. Hello. Not only is this the newest episode, but this is officially the 10-year episode. Yep. People were wondering what we were going to do different. Three ads is what? Welcome. Listen, we have to make up the COVID ad that we missed side covid all right the little victories it's 10 years three people are like you can like play games you do a live broadcast you can bring dan

on you like do all this um yeah we could it's like oh yeah well i uh i'll be honest i forgot until you just told me so yeah no it's it's pretty fitting to be honest um i actually went back and was like listening to some of the old episodes and i can't stand them like i genuinely i think it's just what about us sucks so bad you can't listen it's not even you you are like the same but i'm like i'm a i don't know i hate the way i talk i hate the way i just i'm hate the way I just, I'm like a dick. I don't know what it is. I'm just like, I have this like kind of pompous like, and I hate it. I want to like punch myself.

You aged up. I think 10 years, you have changed as a person. Both you and Toast have matured and grown, and I think it's very sweet and lovely. Me? Not at all. Nothing has changed about me. I've watched the two of you go from young adults to full adulthood,

and now you're in your prime, and I'm over here still the biggest goober who ever was. Yeah, plus I guess you were already eight years old or whatever. I don't remember what it was. So you've already had your kind of mature into who you were phase phase i was still like i know that never happened to me i was still just dumb young taking my feeling good health for granted you know god i had no pain yeah you didn't life hadn't worn you down yet. You're still living for the moment. I was. But, you know, I wouldn't be Buffdor without that past.

That's what I'm saying. The road that you walked made you who you are today. Yeah, that's true. I skipped that road. I went a separate path. I saw some swing sets off the distance and went that way. It's actually funny. You can actually see this in my WoW levelings.

You can see the maturation of me. Or just the life part. How long have you been doing WoW leveling? I think like nine years. WoW leveling Crandor. I'm looking up right now. Episode one. Shut up. Yeah yeah what is it December 9th 2012

2012 Crandor it was right after we started this my favorite part is while leveling episode one December 9th 2012 while leveling episode 156 June 22nd 2020 that's so fun you know what i can actually

see you slowing down though because 156 was 2020 and 166 was 2022 yeah here's the thing i should just do a 30 minutes of the new like event they added i'll get like 20 levels from that that thing's easy to level but if you listen to my intros i did this on stream like a while ago but if you listen to my intros the first episode i'm like hello everyone welcome to a while leveling and here i am krendor and we're going to partake on an adventure and then i'm just like oh hello everybody and then i'm like hey everybody it's me krendor and then i'm like hey everybody it's me krendor and i'm like yo what, everybody, it's me, Krendor. And then I'm like, hey, everybody, it's me, Krendor. And I'm like, yo, what's up? I'm positive you went through puberty, Dorian, because the first episode, everyone just Google

while leveling Krendor. It will bring up all of them. But the first episode will be the first one that appears. Just click that. I swear to God, take Krendor's voice right now. Pitch it up about five octaves. That's what I'm saying. Hello, everyone.

Welcome. It's me, Kretdor. Go from like episode one to like 50, just go in 50 chunks. Go 150, 100, 150, and you'll see the progression. This is amazing. This really is. This is a time capsule, my dude.

The first one, I swear, first one is, hello everyone, it's me, Kretdor. And then if you go to 166, it's like, hello, everyone. Hey, how's it going? It's me, Krendor. It's like that with Cox and Krendor, too. Sure. All right, now I get it.

And then just, God. God, there's so many dumb things I said. If I said anything dumb, if you go back and listen to these and you're like, Crandor, why did you say that? That was so dumb. I'm sorry. I would punch myself. Like, straight up.

I would beat myself up from back then. I think there's a lot of dumb things everyone said. But also, it's because, you know, again, we were growing and we were maturing as people. And I'm a little further behind than every other human being. That's a fact. I think I've told this on this podcast before, but I'll never forget it as long as I live. And I think it's stuck with me so much that I think I live my life just to piss this lady off. When I turned 13, this is not a joke.

This really happened. When I turned 13, the day of my birthday party, I think we went out to the movies that night, and one of my friend's moms was driving. And I'll never forget, she said to me, she said, now that you're a teenager, that means you can finally grow up. And I was, I think my entire existence has been to anger her. That does sound right. existence has been to anger her. That does sound right. She looked at me and was like, grow up. Stop

acting like a kid. Stop being silly. And I was like, no. I will always be silly. I will always be goofy. You can never defeat me. That's the flashback they always do in movies. That's your flashback.

This boring house mom in oakwood ohio who was like you should grow up it's just you know like somewhere like some event or some bar and someone's just like god why are you always so silly and goofy can't you just be serious and that's just you like it zooms into your eyes and you're just just that mom yelling at you like this is when you grow up you stop being childish and it's just just that mom yelling at you like this is when you grow up you stop being childish and it's just like that it just fades out like childish childish childish childish the more i thought about the more i was like my parents were so open and welcoming to like whatever i wanted to do they were completely on board for me just expressing myself and i keep

thinking about this kid's family because Because he was a nice kid. He was a genuinely good human being. But I also know that his home life probably sucked. If that's the kind of attitude that his mom had with a stranger, you know she's going off on him. Toys? You don't need a Nintendo entertainment system. It'll rot your brain.

You just need books. Plus, you're like 13? 13, dude! You're still a kid for like another 5 years. In fact, I'd say you're a kid until like until you hit like 25. I pretty much, it's like you're a kid. 13, bro. 13, she was like

time to grow up. Whoa. Yeah, that's that lady's crazy. Yes, that lady is very crazy. Well, let me tell you about my, speaking of being old. So on Friday, we went and got brunch. And I love brunch. I think brunch might be my favorite meal of the day.

Was this a you and toast brunch? Was this a friend brunch? What kind of brunch was this? This was a me and toast brunch. Oh, lovely. And so we were like, yeah, let's get brunch. So we went to a place and... On a Friday?

Yeah, dude, Friday brunches are the best. I've never had a Friday. I've only had Saturday, Sunday brunch. A Friday brunch? That sounds like a Chicago thing. Friday brunch, you're just, you know, it's like kind of the weekend. You know what I mean? like there's people going there because they're like hey it's almost the weekend uh there's either like business meetings happening with like two people uh but like casual business meetings you know they're not like in business they're just like hey uh there's

big groups of like old they're just like hey this. Hey. Big groups of old people. There's like this table of eight old women. One of them legit looked like your mom. Lovely. Like straight up. She probably was there. She could have been there. That's true. And she was like the youngest one there.

Hell yeah. Get it, mom. She was talking and she's like, they met when they were 18. And then when they got married, they were 34. And everyone's like, oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. I would say that that is probably like an old person's true horror.

They met when they were 18 and then didn't marry until they were 34. They were all like, oh, everyone's clutching pearls. She's doing the what's it called? The Hail Mary with the pearl or the cross. And then there's, they looked like a group of also like retired teachers almost. And they were just talking. You'd hear like random stuff from their table. Just like, oh, well.

And then they'd be like, well, here, see y'all Monday. And they're like, yep, see everybody Monday. And'd be like, well, see you all Monday. And they're like, yep, see everybody Monday. And I was like, wait a second. Do they do something together on Monday? Is this like a club? Are they coming back here for brunch on Monday? I want to know. Right?

I'm curious. Maybe they do. Maybe they have like a we meet every day and chit chat. I know for a fact that there's groups of old ladies who do that. They find ways of doing it, you know what I mean? Sometimes it's brunch and something. My mom, for example, she'd meet when she used to live in Kentucky, she'd meet

all of her old lady friends at the pool and it would be during a swim exercise thing. I feel terrible for, I watched it happen once, I feel terrible for the I watched it happen once. I feel terrible for the instructor because imagine an instructor

who's in the prime of her life sitting there physically fit trying to get these old ladies in this pool to do aerobics with her and all the old ladies want to do, I watched it happen, dude. There's like eight in a corner all together

feigning exercise as they sit there chatting about their lives and this there's like eight in a corner all together feigning exercise as they sit there chatting about their lives and this woman's like all right next up let's move those arms and i'm just watching them just kind of moving their arms talking about stuff i have never seen anything like it but it reminded me of teaching so much you just just go, all right, come on. I'm trying so hard. I love that. This is what I mean. This is why brunch is so good. You get these moments.

This is like the prime, because a lot of older people, they don't want to go to breakfast, unless they're like my parents. They wake up at like 4 a.m. But most old people, they're retired. They're like, oh, let's get brunch, because you get the breakfast lunch You can get a sandwich or you can get pancakes

No that's just a trick that's a lie Most old people have already been up and had breakfast 12 hours ago That's true this could be their lunch Brunch is like dinner kind of My dad would be like I had a great brunch I don't need to eat the rest of the day And then he'd proceed to snack

The rest of the day He's like I didn't have a meal though I don't need to eat the rest of the day. And then he proceeds to snack the rest of the day. He's like, I didn't have a meal, though. I didn't have a meal. Or it's like there's also the person who wakes up early, but the person who wakes up later. And so they're like, well, we'll just get brunch, right? It's like meeting in the middle.

It's a good spot to meet it. Yeah. So there's other people coming in being like, whatever. So we were sitting there we ordered we were waiting and then the best table showed up the best table all right okay so this guy he's 90s like maybe mid to late 90s yeah he's got his walker and i think i don't know if it was like his caretaker or like his like son-in-law or his like whatever. And they're like, all right, you can sit down.

And then his actual son, who's like 70 at this point, because then he's like, hey, dad, you sit here. And these three dudes like sit down. And the first thing he says when they give him the menu, he's like pumpkin pancakes. Zero interest in pumpkin. Zero interest. And I was like like this is it this is the table and so he starts talking and he's like yeah i remember it was uh god was it nixon oh whatever and he's like i i remember iwo jima i saw it happen iwo jima that's all he said he said iwo jima iwo jima i remember i saw it happen i um would love to just sit down and talk with this

guy i imagine he's got so many stories to tell and i don't even i don't even know that any of them are appropriate but i'll be honest I bet it's a wild ride. Oh, it's got to be. Then they go to order. They all order, and then he wants crispy bacon. Of course he does. It reminds me of hardtack or whatever the hell he's been eating all his life. Probably.

He's like, I want crispy bacon, the crispiest bacon. And then they were like, all right, we'll make you crispy bacon. He's like, crispy bacon. So they start talking then they were like all right we'll uh we'll make you crispy bacon he's like crispy bacon so they start talking they're like talking about whatever and then they come out with the food and there's no crispy bacon oh this dude it's over it's over it's over for this entire business they're done so they're waiting a bit and i think they thought it was like coming out soon like oh maybe they maybe they were just a little late with it. But nope. Then the waiter comes back. He's like, where?

Or no, he came back. He filled waters and doing all that. And he's like, he didn't bring the bacon. And they're like, yeah, he didn't bring the bacon. He's like, where's the bacon? And he's like, get the waiter. And so the waitress walks by. He's like, can you get our waiter?

He forgot our bacon. So she's like, oh, OK. And he comes out. And he's like can you get our waiter he forgot our bacon so she's like okay and he comes out and he's like we ordered crispy bacon and he's like oh my god i'm sorry i forgot i'll go get it right now and then he's like it'll be out in a couple minutes so clearly he like didn't write it down or just forgot or whatever yeah he just the best part is he's like yeah yeah no i got it i got it crispy bacon oh you screwed up now son yeah and so no tip for you five minutes later they bring out his crispy bacon but he loved it he was eating it and they were like oh that's crispy he's like this is crispy this is crispy bacon this right here is crispy bacon i'm glad

it had a happy ending i'm thinking about my dad and I can't figure out whether my dad would sit there and eat what he had, waiting for the bacon or be so upset about no bacon, refuse to eat any of it and demand a refund or he would wait angrily for the bacon to arrive. When the bacon

arrived, he would then complain about his food being cold because he hadn't touched it since the bacon. Like, it's one of those three. I'm trying to imagine my dad in this situation it's definitely one of those three things my dad would be like that too he would definitely he would just be like you know i i got i ordered crispy bacon but you know i guess it just you know somebody just didn't make it or it didn't come out or like he would just say like a passive aggressive type of thing like that yes my my dad would definitely make a scene but not in like a loud crazy way but in a

we're at a table with you and whatever's about to happen is going to be insane. And it's going to be extremely embarrassing and I don't want to be here anymore. Yes.

Yes. Absolutely. It's like you don't have to do any of that. You don't have to make a show. You don't have to my dad's one of those three things.

I have to imagine he would sit there and not eat his food waiting for the bacon. And he'd do that to make a point that it took so long for the bacon to arrive that his food is now cold. And he'll point out that his food is now cold because they didn't bring his bacon on time and he didn't want to eat it without the bacon. So all of it is their fault. You know what I mean?

That's the attitude I think you'd have. Oh, yeah. No, I see that. I don't know if that's just, you know, like an old man. I guess it's not every old guy. It's like this guy was 95. He didn't care. He just wanted his bacon.

He got it. I mean, if you make it to 95, I'm pretty sure you take the wins when you can get them. I don't have time to be angry anymore. I'm 95. I have maybe one good year left. Yeah, you don't know. At know that point just eat what you want do you want who cares yeah to hell with it like that's the that's the point where they're like my wrist hurts and they're like well i guess i mean it's deteriorating

like what are you gonna do i mean you technically you shouldn't even have a wrist. You're so very old. You should just, it should just fall off. Like, oh, okay. Yep. So, yeah, that was great brunch. Great stuff. I enjoyed that. And then, I think, because the week before we also did brunch. We're almost like making Friday into brunch day at this point. That's fun.

That's nice to have a tradition, like a brunch day at this point. That's fun. That's nice to have a tradition, like a little family thing you do. That's nice. Yeah. So we went to another breakfast place the week before, but I don't think there's any crazy people then. It was just your normal like breakfast crew and like people talking and whatever, but no crazy people. So I was like, you know, it's fun. That's why you got to be friends with the crazy people. If you become friends with the crazy people, there will always be crazy people there. I like you know that's why you gotta be friends with the crazy people if you become friends with the crazy people there will always be crazy people there i don't do that you

would do that which is why you always say oh the crazy people always come to me that's why yeah i feel like i've got a big crazy beacon you do i'm a lighthouse for crazy people and i'm totally fine with it yeah like come on let's get weird come Come on, crazy people. Let's have fun. Overall, love brunch. Great meal. Speaking of food, I was on Reddit the other day, and I saw a topic someone posted where they said, today I learned tomatoes are native to the Americas, so there's no such thing as tomato sauce in Italy

until at least the 16th century. Oh? I thought that was very interesting. I was like, yes, of course. I mean, it's a known fact. There's a lot of great videos about, you know, another fact that I think a lot of people didn't know is that potatoes aren't native to Ireland, right? The potatoes aren't native to Ireland, right? And so everyone associates the Irish with the potatoes, but that's an America's crop, right?

And yeah, same with tobacco and corn. Interesting. Right? That's an America crop. And what's fascinating to me is I think we talked about this before. And what's fascinating to me is, I think we talked about this before, there's a video online where a guy is like, in the old Roman Empire, they had French fries, except it wasn't French fries, obviously, because there's no French, but it was, instead of a potato,

it was some other tuber that was cut up and deep fried. And then instead of ketchup, they had what would basically be the equivalent of an HP sauce the UK has. Oh, I see. And that was their french fries. It's been a thing. Like, deep-frying roots and stuff is a thing that has happened for some time. And it wasn't until potatoes were found. And I thought that was

fascinating. I was blown away by that. But the thing that baffled me, and I had to look this up because this is where I was like, hmm, hmm. So corn, right, is maize, and maize is from the Americas. Right. But, and this is what sent me on a Jesse discovers a thing. Yeah.

How is it called corned beef? Oh, yeah. How is it called corned beef? Oh, yeah. And so I deep dove on the internet and discovered that corned beef is, it does not refer to any corn related anything. But the corns in corned beef refer to the corns of rock salt used to preserve meat. It has nothing to do with grain And I was like wait So it's called corns of rock salt

Which I guess is why corn is called corn Because of the little like knobs The kernels Yeah the kernels I guess Huh Yeah it was crazy to me Also that deep dive Took me then on another deep dive

Which was There was no such thing as chilies in India. When you think India, you think curry and spice. When you think of most of Southeast Asia, you think spice. That shit did not exist. That was trade routed to there and later added to the food. Most original, like kimchi, for example, was not originally spicy. Oh, interesting.

So a lot of it is just like trade. Yeah, yeah. It all comes from trade and exploring and all that stuff. And when you think of Thai food or Vietnamese food, anything, you think of the chilies in it. It's synonymous with it. Did not exist.

Man, that's crazy. Yeah, I didn't Did not exist That's crazy That's the type of learning I like That's crazy learning And it's the kind of learning That when I was a teacher I would always Try to get my kids to think about Because the idea of Now that I learned that

Asia didn't have spices Like hot chilies They had other types of spices, obviously. That's, you know, the trade routes with silk and spice. They didn't have hot chilies, right? And so now that you know that, it's like, huh, so where do they get those from? And then that starts the education of like, oh, now I'm learning about that. And now I'm learning about like trade routes.

And now I'm learning about the different ways that this stuff is harvested and by who. And that's how you get people to learn because it's interesting. And a lot of the times we totally screw that up in school. We're just like, here's a date. Memorize it. You really shouldn't have to do that. It's just, well, in fact, most schools, just memorization.

Here's thing. Memorize. And that's it. That's why people is crying because it's like memorize, memorize. But obviously, it should That's why people is crying. It's like, memorize, memorize. But obviously, you know, I think. Yeah, it should be organic. You should want to, if you're doing history, for example, you want to know about the thing that occurred. And you can be like, okay, yeah. So World War II, we're not going to talk about, you know, dates of things that happened.

Like, let's just talk about how it started. And let's go from there. And then what happened after. It's all like cause how it started. Let's go from there. What happened after? It's all like cause and effect. Same thing in everything in education. It's like, okay, why did this happen? Why did this happen? How come this happened?

If you just ask those questions, it's so much easier to learn. I think people just stopped learning a while ago. Well, the thing is, I think people enjoy learning more online because you can you learn on youtube you can learn from reading you can i mean there's so many ways to learn and it's just like school is good for like certain things and other things it just is like a memorization book you know right which you know some things you have to memorize like if you're you know a doctor and you're like i need to remember this drug does this thing. And you're like, I forgot.

Right. What's even more fascinating is in the topic about spaghetti sauce and red tomato sauce, people were adding stuff to it. Like this one guy posted, weed is not native to Jamaica, which is pretty obvious. Yeah. This one guy posted Vikings. When you think of a hearty Viking meal, you might think meat and potatoes, but there's no – Vikings didn't have potatoes. Right? They probably had grains or breads or barleys, things like that.

And then one guy posted chocolate is not native to Switzerland. Yeah. It was – chocolate was brought there from South America. Huh. Look at that. And everyone thinks like thinks like Oh Swiss chocolate's the best It's cause of trading stuff Look at that the power of trading Yeah

Pretty crazy And so things that were not native to an area Became associated like when people were like Oh Irish potatoes The Irish didn't have potatoes That was brought there cause it was an easy to grow crop and like really crappy weather. Speaking of which, would do you like home fries more or do you like hash browns? Oh, it depends. It depends on the meal.

If I'm having some sort of hash, this is how you know i love brunch if i'm having some sort of hash or some sort of like substantial meat home fries always always but if i'm having like eggs toast hash browns that's the spot you put some hot sauce or ketchup on that in fact you do it to the whole damn plate that's where it's at yeah if i'm having like a bacon if it's a minimal meat hash browns because you got to have that crisp and the like the flip and stuff bacon, if it's a minimal meat, hash browns. Because you've got to have that crisp and the flip and stuff. And then if it's like there's meat on the plate, you've got to have the home fries. That's just the way it works for me. Yeah, every time I'd rather have home fries. I don't like the crispiness of the hash browns.

Oh, I love a good crisp. And you put like maybe a hot ketchup or ketchup and then hot sauce on it. And then you just mix it. You just whip it together like some sort of crazy man. It's delicious. Delicious. I'm not a hash brown person. I don't know.

I'm not. I think a lot of the time for breakfast, it just depends on. Because there's other. There's other. What other breakfast. There's something else I'm thinking about. There's another breakfast potatoes. There's some other breakfasts. There's something else I'm thinking about. There's another breakfast potatoes. There's some other breakfast potato.

There's skillet potatoes, the ones that are kind of spicy. Skillet potatoes? Hold on. It literally is just home fries, but like spicy home fries. I see. There's like peppers in it and stuff like that. Oh, yeah.

I see. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right. Here we go. Related searches. Potatoes and onions. Eggs Benedict.

I'm not a big Eggs Benedict fan. Omelette de potatoes. I'm here for it. Eggs plus taters in an omelette form. Sign me up. I like a skillet. Love a good skillet Love a good omelette

I like eggs and ham That's a good combo Just any egg with ham Would you eat this? I'm sending this link It is twice baked breakfast potatoes I would 100% eat that It literally is just a potato Hollowed out with an egg, bacon, and cheese.

And it looks like chives in the hollowed out. I would eat that in a heartbeat. That looks amazing. I would 100% eat that. That looks really good. I'm like, man, that's the breakfast I want. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

That's good. I don. Yeah. Oh, yeah. That's good. I don't know. Who is this? Terry and Jenny. This is their Spoon Fork Bacon website. You know what, Terry and Jenny? Y'all, you two made a delicious recipe here. This thing looks amazing.

That is amazing. You know what isn't amazing? Oh, no. Yes. Cosmopolitan. Because I remember we used to go here all right i figured we needed some sort of call back this episode and i thought this would be fun to just glance at what they have well before we do that then we have to do the ads. This could be the entire episode for all I know. I have no idea what's about to happen. We'll see. It's Cosmo.

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For listeners of the show, again, 40% off a Calm premium subscription at calm.com. And finally, it's that time of year again. We're all sitting around talking about gratitude, about what we're thankful for, that kind of thing. Well, I am thankful for my fine tush. It's a good one. It's a good one. This booty needs to be treated, number one.

And the best gift you can give to your number one. It's a good one. This booty needs to be treated number one. And the best gift you can give to your number one is something for their number two. I did it! I did it, Condor! You did it. Now that's an intro. Of course I'm talking about Hello Tushy, the bidet

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Add yourself to a holiday shopping list and save $90 when you buy to this holiday season. Go to hellotushy.com and save big on them gifts for that big old butt. Now let's jump into the car that drives us over to Cosmopolitan. the car that drives us over to Cosmopolitan. So, I found one article that I think will be good at talking about, but here are some other articles

I have seen. This page has dating advice you need RN for right now, I take it. They couldn't fit right now into the headline? They could have.

Very easily. There's also casual dating might be the move this cuffing season. What is cuffing season? What does any of that mean? Isn't that the holidays? Cuffing season. Cuffing season. I can't believe we're both looking this up. What is cuffing season? For people to date

in the holiday months or the cold parts of the year because everyone is like lonely and it's cold and side outside and everyone's like holidays and stuff you know are you kidding me that is i'm gonna let you know that's the thing that you're engaging that's the saddest shit i've ever heard honest to god i've heard a lot of sad shit And this is up there It's like I just can't be alone When it's cold That's some sad shit That is kind of a you need to find yourself

Type of thing Like you know what for this cuffing season Just date yourself find out who you are You know That really is weird I can't believe this is a thing I didn't even know this existed. Based on the idea of handcuffed, tied down to one partner,

refers to people who get into relationships during colder months of the year, even though they ordinarily wouldn't be interested in commitment. Bizarre. Bizarre. Okay, yeah, people be like that, I guess. Let's see. We also have... Hours after breaking up with my ex. I hooked up with his best friend who was also our roommate.

Yeah. All right. I mean, live your life, I guess. I don't know. This is why I never understood Cosmo. I don't know why that's print worthy. Okay. I mean, you made your living situation more complicated, but like, I'm glad you enjoyed

that hour. I'm going to give you an, I'm going, but like, I'm glad you enjoyed that hour. I'm going to give you, I'm going to say hour. I'm going to give that man some credit. I'm going to say hour. I hope it was an hour, but I'm going to let you know, like, you just made your living situation way more complicated. And that didn't need to be printed ever. But okay. It definitely did not. They also, underneath that title, when you click on the thing, it says,

Did we have sex in the kitchen while my ex was sleeping mere feet away? Yes. Yes, we did. I'm going to let you know. Cool, dude. I don't think that happened. I don't think it did either. That is the premise of a porn, not an article.

I don't think that happened. I'm going to say, for the record, I think think 90-95% of the things that are in Cosmo Did not happen And is just like Sex fan fiction for women It almost does feel that way There's not The headline alone, fake

I'm gonna say fake I'm gonna say it didn't happen Let's see We also have Four must know rules For taking a break in a relationship Just break up there's your answer If you have to take a break

In a relationship you shouldn't be together Like that's Take a break Here's what taking a break means one person wants to sleep with someone else I'd say There's a very extreme Small amount of people where a break would be like yeah but i feel like if they're taking a break they're still like talking to

each other you know what i mean they're not like but i don't think it's like if you i don't know man if if this is like a normal relationship you would probably talk to each other like hey uh you wouldn't say you want to take a break you're just like yo can i just like have a few days myself or something and then whatever like i don't know yeah like hey i need some time on my own like okay yeah i won't bug you but like you don't need to leave my home this relationship needs a break like that is yeah like that's crazy that's that's an end of a relationship that does feel like that hey uh i don't know about this relationship anymore and i kind of want to date another person just to see.

That's what it feels like. Yes, at least be honest. At least say, look, I don't know where I stand with you anymore. I want to try dating other people and seeing if my relationship with you is, if it's something to keep. Just be honest. Just say what you're going to do. This whole, like, we need to take a break.

You're like, no, you just want to date other people. The problem with that, too, is that you're saying just be honest. Just say what you're going to do. This whole, like, we need to take a break. You're like, nah, you just want to date other people. The problem with that, too, is that you're saying just be honest. Like, this already shows there's a communication problem. Oh, of course. Which is, like, the foundation of a relationship. Like, you already have, like, I'm too afraid to break up. You know? And you're doing, like, take a break instead of breaking up.

It's almost like you don't want to say no. Right? breaking it like it's almost like a you don't want to say no right it's the equivalent of i'm hoping time apart will make us feel you know separated so this will be easier to break up yeah and it feels like that too you're right um it's never none of that is a good when someone says let's take a break it isn't like well so that then we can get back together and be stronger no it's like let's take a break so the breakup isn't as hard on us yeah like otherwise you'd be going to like relationship therapy or something absolutely or you would have had like you said had a conversation where the two of you would sit down and like you know sometimes i need my alone time sometimes

maybe i want to go on a day trip by myself away they'd be like well why do you want that you want that? Well, being alone in a car, listening to music, driving on the road, it calms me. It makes me – like that kind of shit. You just talk to the person and they're like, all right, I understand why you would do that. It isn't because you're trying to get away from me to go see your secret lover or whatever. You just talk to a person and you alleviate concerns. You're like, no, I'm doing this for me. It isn't like Jesse the secret love man going to run around. No, it's like sometimes I want time to myself.

And an understanding partner would be like, okay, cool. Yeah. This is like when I, even though people tell me this doesn't exist on TikTok, I always get dating advice on TikTok. Always. I don't know what it knows about me, but I always get dating advice, but it's terrible advice. It's always just like, guys, if a girl messages you, you must wait minimum four hours to respond. If anything, respond the next day. Let her know that you're busy so that she doesn't think you're some simp just trying to get with her.

And I'm like, boy, I fail at that. If a girl that I like messages me, I'm on it and i'm like boy i fail at that if a girl that i like messages me i'm on it i'm like yo what up like i am the biggest idiot when it comes i'm like i'm not gonna play games like weird pickup game stuff like i feel like two people actually like each other they're just gonna talk it 100 is some dude thinks he figured out how to game relationships and i'm sure for some people it works right like for him he probably got some girl who like had really low self-esteem and he strung her along and was terrible to her and he's like guys this is how you can be terrible to women guys are like yeah it's not a game though why are you talking about gamifying relationships it's not a game yeah it's it's just it's literally

just like the same way you make friends you don't make friends being like all right let's play this friendship game well maybe some people do i don't know but like you know you're just it's just an advanced level of that like you're just in a role like actual full-blown relationship most time you're just you're like friends you stuff together. You enjoy being around each other. But, you know, you also do it. That's really, honest to God, that's really the perfect

relationship. You're like very good friends and every once in a while, you look at each other's junk. Yeah. That's it. That's really it. You're like, yeah, I want some of that. Also, do you want to go do something this weekend? That's really it you're like yeah i want some of that also do you want to go do something this weekend like that's yeah that's really what it is um and speaking of the which we've got 30 conversation starters for texting that'll make your flirty banter way more productive

uh-huh all right yes this is the article i wanted to bring up to read. Okay, all right. So here we go. Wait, do we need to do news sports and all that stuff, or are we just going in? Actually, yeah, now we'll do news sports. Let's do that. All right. And weather. Wait, traffic. Wait, both.

Go. It's the double. Here we are up in the chapter the electrified zoom mobile I don't even know what this thing is anymore hold on alright there we go looking down

I mean there's traffic out there but I was looking up and apparently this is the 10 year anniversary which is the tin or aluminum tin or aluminum. Tin or aluminum anniversary. So there you go. Back to you.

Thanks, Crandor. You know what? For my Brits out there, it's our aluminum anniversary. Aluminium. Aluminium. Okay. Let's do weather. I like the way aluminum sounds more, I think.

I like it, too. Aluminum is whatever. Aluminium sounds weather. I like the way aluminum sounds more. I like it too. Aluminum is whatever. Aluminum sounds amazing. I agree. It's like when in Star Wars when Ewan McGregor instead of specialty goes, it's all speciality. Speciality I like better. I like it better. It's a little more fancy. Yeah.

Big fan. Weather. So we got a weather request. I thought this would be fitting. For Horny Bar Slovakia. Horny Bar? Horny Bar Slovakia. They said, I posted this on a previous video.

Someone said I should post it again. It's pronounced horny with a rolling R and a long E sound for the Y. And bar, again with the rolling R. All the other letters are the same. Yeah, I see it. It's a small town on the northern bank of Danube in today's Slovakia. Danube? Danube.

Danube? The first written mention of the town. It's in 1245 during the Hungarian Kingdom era, and its modern version of the name is derived from the Hungarian original name of Felbar. Fel is a prefix which in context means upper and bar. They wrote a lot. I'm sorry, dude. I can't read all this.

The town today has two churches, one dating to the 14th century, the other the 18th century. It used to have a castle, but it doesn't exist anymore. The town, even though in Slovakia, is primarily inhabited by ethnic Hungarians. Much of the southern Slovakia is inhabited by ethnic Hungarians to this day, as the area was given to Czechoslovakia in the Treaty of Trianon after World War I in order to reward Czechoslovakia for fighting for the Entente and to give them access to the Danube River. The Danube River.

Yeah. The Danube River. There you go. The weather in Hornibar. Or Horni. Is that how you say it? You roll the R? Hornibar.

Hornibar. Hornibar. Horn the bottle. 34 degrees. Partly cloudy. Day 41, night 31. You got some mixed precipitation after 7 a.m. Snowfall coming in. Less than an inch, but it's still snowing.

I'll let Woppy take it from here for the anniversary. WoppyI activate. Humidity, 99%. Pressure, 29.86 inches. Visibility, 5 miles, 7.04 a.m. Sunrise, 4.06 p.m. Sunset, wind, 2 miles per hour, dew point, 34. UV index, 0.

Moon phase, waning crescent looking at the 10 day we got loading 42 degrees with some a.m. rain and ice you got 41 p.m. light rain on Tuesday Wednesday rain and showers those are the same thing you got 41 PM light rain. On Tuesday, you got Wednesday rain and showers. Those are the same thing. Thursday, you got 46 AM showers. Friday, 46, but partly cloudy, no rain. But then Saturday and Sunday, you got 44 degrees on both with showers. Coming back into the picture.

That's Horny Bar's weather. I'm blown away. This might be the first city that I can't find anything for. When I look up Horny Bar, everything that's there says it's in a nearby city. Even TripAdvisor. I go to TripAdvisor. It's like top things to do in Horny Bar. It's like nearby attractions.

And it's all one city over. I do see a YouTube video of backflip in Horny Bar. Man's back and it's all one city over. I do see a YouTube video of backflip in Horny Bar. Man's backflipping into water. Here's Piano Bar. I'm going to go to the map. You know what? Google clearly Google Maps will have something

that will show me. I do see an old map of Horny Bar. It looks like it's from when it was one road and six houses. Wait, here you go. Horny bar. What's in horny bar? Here is the piano bar in horny bar.

Can I tell you, that is the only thing. Do you see anything else? Anything else at all? I see two pharmacies Yeah And that Is it

And Wow I don't see anything else Yeah I see a park I see the post office I see What looks like a grocery store, maybe, or a small market. Yeah. And one piano bar.

This does look like piano bar food. The piano bar, I mean, yeah, it looks like, I don't even know. It looks like just a, like a, here's the thing, though. Some of that bread looks delicious. Oh, yeah, it's good bread. They got a lot of meat. That is good bread. Yeah.

A lot of meat. Lots of meat and bread. Yep. And then a giant ass ice cream. Yep, got to have the ice cream. I'm looking to see what they, no, it's literally all meat and bread. I'm scrolling down. I'm like, I wonder what else they have.

Meat. Meat. A giant plate of meat. More meat. More meat. Meat. A buffet of meat. You got crazy pastries.

This, I think, is the only restaurant in the city. It's gotta be. Those sausages look fire, though. Some of those look good. They do look very good. Oh, my God. They have a cream pie thing. Oh, yeah.

I see that. All right. You know what? I'm here for it. Some of this looks super delicious. I can't believe that this is it, though. The outside looks like an old lady's patio. It really does.

There's, like, a gnome. There is. Honest to God, this was someone's house at one point. Oh, it had to be, yeah. 100%. Actually, you can go across the river and there's some stuff. Well, yeah, that's what I'm saying. It said everything was in another town.

Yeah. Yeah, they're like, oh, Bratislava, I think that's how you say that, is north of that. And that's where everything's there. Oh, yeah. This is like a suburb-y kind of vibe. It is. Yeah, it feels very kind of suburb-y. Quarry Bar's down the road, though, man. Yeah, it feels very kind of suburb. 40 bars down the road, though, man.

Yeah, nothing's there, but across the river, you got a Kutva PM. What is a Kutva PM? I don't know. It won't even let me click it. Kutva PM. What is it? What are these places? This place reminds me of, like, Wisconsin.

You know what? Yeah, I'm starting to think most of the world is the exact same place. It's all Wisconsin. Po-ho-stink-skrull-bot-key? Looks like that's beer. Boy, I butchered that. Also a DJ. Also, this also looks like just someone's house. Whoa, that's beer. Boy, I butchered that. Also a DJ. Also, this also looks like just someone's house.

Whoa, that's terrifying. There's the wettest looking dead fish I've ever seen. Oh, it hasn't been cooked yet. Okay. That checks out. This restaurant slash bar, out of all the photos, half of them are of a DJ's laptop. That sounds right. That sounds very, that definitely sounds accurate.

I was going to be like, Eastern European, huh? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. DJ laptop. That checks out. Although, Slovakia counts as Eastern Europe for sure. Yeah. Oh, it definitely is. As somebody who's literally like 100% Eastern European.

Yeah. I don't think anyone's going to argue that like if you're south of Poland, I don't think you count as Western European. If Poland is like directly north of you. Actually, Prague is in between and that's the weather alright sports

sports let's go to sports so we had NFL football action on Thursday the Packers lost to the Titans the falcons beat the bears today the eagles beat the colts the patriots beat the jets commanders beat the texans saints beat the rams bills beat the browns ravens beat the panthers lines beat the giants raiders beat the

broncos cowboys destroyed the vikings bengals currently beating the Steelers. And then we got Chiefs Chargers tonight and 49er Cardinals tomorrow. Looking at the NBA, we've got a Celtics first place. Then the Bucks in second, Hawks in third, Cavs, Pacers, both in fourth and fifth tied there. In the West, you got the Jazz up top, Grizzlies, Suns, Trailblazers all tied in second, and then the Mavericks, Nuggets right behind them. And over in hockey, we got

the New Jersey Devils in first place after winning 12 games in a row. Wowee. Boston Bruins in first. They've won six in a row uh we've got the dallas stars in first they've only won two in a row uh we've got the vegas golden knights who are in first place but they haven't really had a winning game street but they are seven two-1 in their last 10. And that is sports.

Okay. I gave you some facts of the day today. So I feel like we got that down. Yeah, I think we got some good facts. All right, here we go. Yeah, the kids want Cosmo. The kids love Cosmo. So here we go.

This article says, When it comes to dating, whether you met on a dating app or had an epic meet cute that's gross by the way but uh if you don't know what a meet cute is it's movie terminology for when people meet in a movie and it's like kind of cute you know what i mean like they meet for the first time and it's like oh my god like that uh that's what it means it's like yeah it's like fake hollywood talk for when people meet in the beginning of a movie. I see. I did not know that. Well, now you do. And now you know that Cosmo uses it to define actually just meeting a person out in the wild.

That's our fact of the day. There you go. The work isn't done once you find that initial spark. In order to move things along, you have to put in some real effort, which means finding ways to really get to know someone, like asking thought-provoking questions and having meaningful conversations. And since a lot of your interactions will take place via text likely, having some convo starters for texting ready at your fingertips is kinda essential.

The benefits to early stage texting are plenty. First off, it's easy. You can do it from anywhere and you don't have to plan your whole day around meeting up to chat over coffee. It can also feel safer in the early stages since you're not physically with the person you're trying to get to know. Plus, the delay between messages gives you both a little more time to respond thoughtfully, which can be beneficial if you're nervous or still testing the waters, says Mia Lux, the co-founder and CEO of the dating app and virtual social club, Lovette Social Club.

I just want to point out for the record, I love that they're like, we got this person whose whole job is to make it so relationships happen more and more online. Talk to you about why texting is so good for relationships. Yeah. I cannot begin to tell you how much I disagree with that. Today, we got the CEO of Coca-Cola here to tell you why Coca-Cola is so good at your family gatherings.

It just brings people together. They love having an ice cold Coke with whatever meal you got around. Yeah, I cannot stress this enough. Maybe it's just me, but I'm going to put this out to the world. I will text in relationships, but I hate it. I would rather have a conversation and talk to you because at least inflection you can tell how a person's talking versus if you text someone.

It's like that Keaton Peele sketch where one person's texting and he's like, oh, I can't wait to be there. And the other person's like, you can't. What? It's like that kind of idea where sometimes when people text me, I can't read into whether they're joking or not. So I accept it at face value. Right. Rather than sit there and try to figure out your intention behind what you just wrote me or if you're being playful or coy.

If I'm just starting to get to know you, I want to get to know you. I don't want to sit there and be like, what do they mean by this? What does that mean? I can just be on the phone and hear your voice and be like what do they mean by this what does that mean i can just be on the phone and hear your voice and be like oh okay but no one wants to talk anymore thanks to this lady who's like come to my social app where you'll never have to talk to anyone again yeah that's like uh that's like if somebody just says okay like yes if you know it's me and i'm you're like hey you want to do this thing i'd be like okay and you're like oh okay but you know it's me and you're like, hey, you want to do this thing? I'd be like, OK. And you're like, OK.

But then if it's somebody you don't know and you say, well, this thing, they go, OK, they might be saying that because they don't want to do it. It's like a passive aggressive thing. Like, OK. Right. And you don't and you don't know unless you're talking to them and you can hear it in their voice. Yeah. And that's I think a huge issue with online dating And You know texting because Unless you're open and honest in your text Communications right

It's going to be really hard because if everyone's still trying to play Games like we're going to know each other I don't know the way you talk And if you're texting me I'm going to assume you're texting me like a normal So when you're like okay I'm going to be like alright they said okay I'm not

gonna sit there and think what does that mean because i don't have the patience or time to do that i'm not gonna be like i'm gonna analyze your entire life to figure out what this okay meant like no i'm gonna see i'm gonna assume you meant okay and i'm gonna move on with my life and if you are being passive aggressive that's on you yeah exactly um first a few text conversation tips to keep in mind here we go oh boy before you grab your phone and type out a basic how are you think about the goal of your conversation are you trying to get to know the person are you curious about something specific do you simply want to remind them that you exist figure out the purpose before hitting send once you know why you're sending said text luck says to figure out how to accomplish your goal in a fun casual and light

hearted way think about giving value and adding to their day instead of being just another notification on their phone oh my god well are you are you have added value to my day? That's how I view all relationships. Have you added to my day? Have you added anything of value to my day? Let's see. I'm incredibly selfish. And I don't know if you've added to my daily value.

I am very important. And I don't know if I got time to not add value to my day. Yeah. and I don't know if I got time to not add value to my day. Yeah, I kind of understand the idea behind it is if you're going to message someone, you want to have a conversation not just like, good morning, smiley face. You know what I mean? You want to add more to that.

I get it. I understand. But this is the most corpo bullshit response. The value added and the cost benefit of you like shut up Just it also this is a relationship. They're like write down a piece of paper like a tree like Let's see. Why am I texting this person is it to increase my happiness today? Is it to learn more like just do it you idiot? Yeah, if you care about a person increase my happiness today? Is it to learn more? Just do it, you idiot. Yeah.

If you care about a person, text them. Don't think about, just say like, hey, hope you're having a good day and sending you good vibes at the start of your day. I'd love to talk to you later.

Period. And when you're off work tonight, let's talk. You don't need a business plan to start a conversation. Yeah. Just be like, hey, thinking about you

and I'd love to talk to you when you have free time. Period. It's not even that complicated. Yeah. Just be like, hey, thinking about you, and I'd love to talk to you when you have free time. Period. It's not even that complicated. Yeah. In fact, I'd say most people that like being around somebody, they usually just want to learn more about them. So usually it's just like asking questions about them and like showing you're interested. You know what I mean?

Honest to God, it's the simplest. The way conversations die is when someone – I'll give you're interested. You know what I mean? Honest to God, it's the simplest. The way conversations die is when someone. I'll give you an example. I will say to Crendo, for example, hey, how was your day? What have you been up to? And Crendo responds something like, oh, today I went to the Ikea and it was lovely. And I would respond, oh, why'd you go to Ikea? What were you doing there?

And it isn't like I'm trying to snoop. I'm literally just like, tell me about your life. And then you'd say'd you go to Ikea what what were you doing there and it isn't like I'm trying to snoop and I'm literally just like tell me about your life and then you'd say some more about the Ikea and I'd respond based on things you said and then I'd be like oh that sounds like so much fun maybe next time you go to Ikea we could go together boom they're like it's not even that complicated yeah it's about being just interested and curious of the other person. This doesn't even tie into a romantic relationship. It's just for talking to people in general. Yes, and.

I know it's an improv goof, but yes, and. When someone says something to you, just go with the flow. Sure, yeah, I'd love to know more. I'd love to do this thing. And maybe next time I can come with you. That kind of thing the issue is most people well i wouldn't say most people a good amount of people don't care about that and they just want to talk right like they're like you could be at a i don't know you could be at a sports game right and somebody might be like oh wow that's you know jimmy johnson he's my favorite player and somebody might be like oh wow that's you know jimmy johnson he's my favorite

player and somebody might be like oh that's cool anyway where's the thing right like they don't care they're just like they're in their own head they're in their own like process of like where's my things i want this bubble they're never thinking about like actually listening and like being like wow you like that player why do you like him it's like well i liked him since i was a kid and it's like wow you've liked this since you're a kid that's pretty cool right it's just like and they're like wow they actually care about what i like and they're interested like that's it you're absolutely correct a lot of people don't listen to conversations they are there they look at you but mentally they're checked out doing something else yeah and then when you're done, but mentally they're checked out doing something else.

Or they're thinking about what they're going to say next. Absolutely, yes. They're ready to move on to the next thing that they want to get out and that they want to say because the thing you just said was in the – they were being polite, you know? Oh, yeah, you can say what you want to say, and now it's my turn. And people, I think, just forgot how to have a conversation because of shit like this It was like well I want your 20 ways to text online

Because when you're texting You can see the message Go about your life, do some things Then hours later come back to it and be like Oh I was caught up in some stuff But anyway this is how I feel about that subject You had time to ruminate on it and think But in reality no one's going to sit there and be like

So what have you been up to today And then I just stare at you awkwardly while i think of a response that just doesn't happen yeah people forgot i think how to be in the moment yeah um well let's see what else do they say here well while you might have the urge to be overly flirty or sexual to get their attention try to steer clear of obvious pickup lines or seductive language if the goal isn't just to hook up. I would say also if the goal is to just... Also, FWIW, I don't know what the shit that means. I'm going to look it up.

F-W-4? F-W-I-W? For... For what it's worth. Oh, okay. Serious convo shouldn't really happen over text since it's way too easy for meanings to be misinterpreted and communication to get crossed.

Well, that's what we were saying. Keep things relaxed. And if it does start to feel like a conversation taking a turn, speak up. Ask if it would be better to switch to talking over the phone or FaceTime or just you know, meeting up in real life. This is comical to me.

The first half of this was just like, so when you're talking online do these things, but also don't talk online. You shouldn't do that. If you're having a porn conversation, you shouldn't do that. Like, oh, well, yeah, well yeah obviously lastly keep in mind that folks get busy and can't always text and some people simply don't enjoy texting style communication if the person you're hitting up responds with one word answers or takes forever to get back to you consider ask them about their preferred way to connect maybe they'd rather chat in person or

via phone call instead or they don't like you i added that that's yeah no i was about to say that's that's the one if i'm into someone i will not stop shutting up you're gonna have to get me shut up i can't if i'm into you god you know i'm like all right whatever if i say if i send you a one i got other things to do that are more important than you and you should just understand and i feel like everyone knows everyone knows that deep in their soul if i message you If I send you a one I got other things to do that are more important than you And you should just understand And I feel like everyone knows that deep in their soul If I message you and you send me back Okay

I already believe you are not really that interested And you're just along to see what happens And then my Value of that relationship automatically declines If I'm putting in effort And I'm asking you questions And I'm doing things Like if we're having a conversation If Crenn and I are having a conversation again And I'm putting in effort and I'm asking you questions and I'm doing things,

if we're having a conversation, if Crenn and I are having a conversation again and I'm asking about Ikea and then I say, cool, maybe next time we can go to Ikea and then you say, okay, you've stopped the conversation. At that point, it's up to me now to find another topic to talk about when you should be like, oh, well, what do you like to do? Maybe I can come with you to

something. The ball's in your court now. don't do that people are like okay and at that point i'm like you don't give it you don't care well yeah it's the point where if they did care they would ask questions like they would do what we were doing it's like oh wow what's that thing like they would be genuinely curious as well but if it was like you know if you say something and they don't really care they're gonna be to be like, oh, that's cool. Right? Yeah. When people – I've been in relationships where people are like, oh, yeah, I love to, you know, share things and talk about stuff.

And I'm like, okay, good. Yes. Amazing. I'm totally here for that. Oh, yeah. Sometimes I talk too much about the things I love. I'm like, great. I would love to know more about the things you love.

And then they just don't ever. And I think it's because somewhere along the line, someone told them to shut up about it. You know what I mean? It's possible too, yeah. I have to believe that when you reach 30 plus, you're dealing with the baggage of everyone else's relationship. They've definitely been through a lot at that point, yeah.

And you would think that most people would realize that those are just bad relationships. And it has no effect on you as a person. And you shouldn't base your future relationships off that stuff. But I think you have to come out of a few bad relationships to be like, no, that's not how it normally works. Right. And I think a lot of people have mediocre relationships.

They break up like, that was all right. You have to go through some like you got to go through the mud you gotta go you gotta be like oh i hate life you gotta be there and then you're like you know what no that wasn't me i'm not the problem well here we go we've reached the the the core meal of this article the core the core meal of this article. The core meal. I meant to say core or like the main course and I just said core meal.

The core meal. You know what? It's like cornmeal but for the soul, man. A little more robotic. Here's what they actually text. No matter where you see the relationship going any stimulating

convo begins with a good question if you've just started talking keep the convo light but if you've been exchanging messages for a while and or have been on a few dates feel free to get a little deeper to really learn more whether things are platonic you're on a first date or you're in a long term relationship and just want to mix things

up questions below can amp up your banter and take it from basic to productive in 100 characters or less. Let's hear these questions. I am so curious what they are because I know that they're gonna suck. You know, I don't even have to see the article to know these questions are gonna be total ass.

That's why I wanted you to hear these. Alright, I'm ready for it. Here we go. This is if you're texting a dating app match. This is like you just matched up. Okay. Okay. Number one. Describe yourself in three words.

That's the first thing you say out the gate? Apparently, yeah. Nah. Yeah, I don't like that one. I don't think... If you said describe... It's not a job interview. Yeah. Plus, like... If you you said describe it, it's not a job interview. Yeah.

Plus, like, it's like a job interview. And then what are you going to say? Like, I'm funny, cool, and down to earth. Like, okay, that tells me absolutely nothing. Right? Like, it is. If you're concerned about meeting a person and you don't know them, if I said to you out the gate that, you're already super sus because you don't know them if i said to you out the gate that you're already

super sus because you don't know me yeah yeah yeah you sit there and be like why is this guy asking me these questions that's super weird yeah um it also comes off as not even that genuine it feels like you just read this like a book and they're like say this to someone you're like okay yeah it's the thing you copy pastepaste to every person you match with. Yeah. Next we have, what is the best part of your day today? I think that's a good, you know, end of the day question if you're, I don't know if it's a good opener. But I think if you're with someone and you say good morning to them and you say I'll talk to you later and then later they message you, I think you could easily say, tell me about your date.

What was the best part? Yeah, I agree. What good happened to you today? That was pretty good. I feel like that's a very sweet thing to do and ask them about their day. Not like, oh, vent to me about the bad shit that happened, but instead refocus on what good happened, right? I think that's a positive way. Out the gate on a dating app?

No. So what good happened to you today? Yeah, it's a little right out the gate. It's a little weird. It's a little strange. Maybe it'll work. Who knows? Next up, what's your strangest talent nope that's that is you know what i would reply if i was just anybody i would just be like my

strangest talent is blocking people and ask this question yeah yeah when you say what's your strangest talent that is like F boy code For I want you to tell me about the nasty sex It really is It does give off that vibe yeah If you were an emoji What emoji Would you be

You're never seeing a naked woman If that's your pick-up line. Never happening. You will die alone if you're like, what emoji? You're not a BuzzFeed quiz. What the hell? Personally, I am tongue face emoji. I'm the little poop with the stinky face.

Because I'm a little stinker. Somebody said that. I wouldn't even reply to this. Next we have, what was your first concert? That one seems all right. Especially if somebody says they like music. And you're like, hey, what was your first concert? Agreed.

I think that's a good one. It's not a good opener, per se, but it's certainly a good follow-up if you're talking about music. Like, oh, what kind of concerts do you like? That kind of thing. That makes sense. Yeah. I feel like, I don't know. I think it'd be a good opener if they said it all.

I don't know. Listen, I haven't even used the dating app, so I don't know. The problem is that in dating apps you could put like oh I like music but I think the first if you said what's your favorite concert there's not like context and I guarantee the people that wrote their dating app profile probably

forgot they put I love music I don't know about that because if they love music then why would they forget I would send like putting I love music because they answer 8 million. The thing that I've learned about statistics wise is that there are many, many, many, many more men on dating apps. Obviously, yeah. It's like 80-20 almost.

And then all the women that are on dating apps, I would say that the top half of conventional beauty, that kind of attitude, they're getting bombarded with messages all the time. Right. Every woman I've ever known who uses a dating app, they're being blown up constantly, like hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of messages. So the problem is when you come out asking like, hey, hi, what's your favorite concert? You know they've got hundreds to go Yeah, all right. I'm gonna take the time to answer this question. Yeah, that's true Next we have who's your favorite character from a movie TV show or book I? Mean if they said that they're like a nerd or something like that, that might be like, I'm a book nerd. It could be a fun opener to be like, hey, you know,

I'm trying to get to know you. Who's your favorite character? But that feels like the same thing as the concert thing. I mean, yeah, exactly. But that one was more, it was more open. Like if you would have said, what's your favorite, you know, who's your favorite music artist? What's your favorite song? Your listener. What your favorite music artist? What's your favorite song?

What song you listen to right now or something? I don't know. Yeah, like, you know, oh, I saw that you like music. I love music, too. What are you listening to right now? Yeah. That's a good, quick vibe. Yeah, that's good.

That's good. If you could have dinner with one person Who would it be living or dead Um that's a fun question To ask it like You know we're drunk late at night and we're just The date is winding down kind of thing And we're having a good goof But not like an opener

Yeah I don't know if that's an opener I saw a thing on reddit the other day That was If you had the power to make anyone else immortal, who would it be? And I was like, oh, that's a fun question.

That's true. That could actually be a weird one. Yeah. Because this is great. Yeah. If there was a vote for one person to receive immortality, who would win? And, you know, there's a few joke answers, but most people answer stuff like, there was a guy whose DNA contains a mutation that makes his blood a treatment for some deadly diseases.

I don't remember the particulars, but he gives blood basically as often as practical and has already saved something like 2 million lives. That guy. And I was like damn, I would give that guy immortality. That guy's out there saving the world. My initial thought of that was he would like they would like put him in a chair and they would just, you know, like they capture

somebody like this guy's got the magic stuff and they just like hook up a bunch of things to him and they're just like harvesting him for his blood. He's the new god emperor. I played 40k. Yeah, I know what's up. There would be like wars over him. There's, uh, this guy and there's like harvesting him for his blood he's the new god emperor i played 40k yeah i know what's up there would be like wars over him there's uh this guy says there's a dude in india who has a feeding program that feeds two million kids a day that guy could deserve it yeah there's a lot of good stuff here my brain instantly went to what if you made someone in more immortal that didn't even want to live that That would be like a super punishment, wouldn't it?

That's actually a guy right here wrote, I would vote for my worst enemy as punishment. Locking them away, knowing they'd never die, everyone they loved would die, and they'd be in the dark for eternity. I was like, whoa! That's the darkest thing I've ever heard. That'd be insane.

Yeah, that guy would come out a supervillain for sure. Oh yeah, 100%. The other three we got here is what's your best vacation? What's your favorite holiday? If you were an animal, what animal would you be? Those are the ones. Best vacation is kind of fun if you talk about I like to travel. Again, all this is based off of what do I know about this person to begin with, right?

And so none of these matter unless you already have a foundation of knowing about them. Right? If you say, what's your best vacation? And they don't travel, then they probably might be like, oh, my best vacation is I took a week off. And I thought that could be interesting. Maybe they said they don't travel and you could ask, oh, so you've never taken a vacation? And they might say, oh, no, I have. And they're like, oh, well, then what was your best staycation?

Or like, what did you do that kind of thing It's all about just You're talking to a person you're learning about Them you're having a conversation and you're not Just waiting for your turn to talk yeah Uh Those are all those next we have if you're texting Someone you're casually dating

So this is like we've been together a month Yeah And we see each other on the weekends maybe I guess Either way I'm not gonna lie These questions feel exactly the same Give me one of them What is the vibe

Do you have a life motto What is it Shut up No sane person has a life motto and if they do it's it's gonna be like eat pray love or some bullshit yeah uh we have what's your sign don't do that don't do that you're gonna end up with the girl who's like actually i based all my relationships off astrology. And then you're screwed. We have, what would you do if you won the lottery?

That's a fun question. You can get to know a person based off of like their extreme wealth. You know what I mean? Yeah, that's true. I think that's interesting. What role do you play in your friend group? Don't ask anyone that. Yeah, that is that should be something you can

figure out for yourself. More importantly, don't make anyone get introspective on their own friends. In your friend group, what role do you play? Are you the mom? Do you take care of everyone else? Are you the wild one? Are you the one who's drunk all the time? Are you the weird nerdy one?

Don't make them do that. You're definitely the weird nerdy one. Yeah, why would you? Just tell me more about your friend group so I can judge you based on where you fit in that circle. That's dumb. Get out of town. They're their friends, not your friends. Why the hell do you care?

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Are you more introverted or extroverted? I'm pretty sure you can figure that out. You can probably figure that out, yeah. In one phone conversation, yeah.

Literally, yeah, one. Even just hearing like five sentences. When was the last time you laughed so hard you couldn't breathe? Probably reading this article. Gotcha. Then we have if you're texting someone with long-term potential. All right, this is the ultimate here.

Long-term potential is how you define business. It's amazing to me. The long-term potential of this relationship between these two companies. Shut up. Shut up. What's your love language? I mean, that's something you should figure out at the beginning. Even if you don't use love language in the definitions of what people are into,

you should be able to figure out, oh, this person likes when i tell them i love them versus acting on like like i can do all the things in the world that's that show i care about you but if i don't say it it doesn't mean anything like that you should know that that's a conversation should figure that out yeah uh are you A better talker or listener That's Again you should figure that out just by Communicating but okay What's the best thing about getting older What's the worst

Why would you Look I'm not Going to tell you what to do But if you ever ask a woman What's the best thing about getting older They're going to hear So now that you're old what's it like There's no way that's a win for you If you ever say to a woman

What's the best thing about getting older They do not hear it any other way except for Now that you're an old lady No come on don't do that That's a terrible one Who is your role model and why Now that you're an old lady, no, come on. Don't do that. Don't do that. That's a terrible one. Who is your role model and why? That's actually kind of funny.

I would love to know. I want to hear someone be like, I'm a huge fan of Ted Bundy. What? Why? I don't know. He had some things right. Like, uh, let's see how often do you visit home how do you feel when you do i mean those are questions i think would come up organically while talking about someone's family right eventually you have to talk about your families right i feel like saying

it like that just feels weird instead of just asking it like a normal human. Yeah, this does feel like... How often do you visit your residential... Oh, how often or how do you feel when you do so? Is it good or bad? Are you taking notes right now? Where do you

live? And how often do you go there? What days are you absent? Is there any jewelry on the premises? What's something that makes you nervous? If someone was in your home and they had that thing that made you nervous, would you be more or less likely to call the cops? Do you have pets?

Just asking. Specifically a large dog? When is that dog outdoors? Is there a gate you can lock? That's really all these questions. That's like all they are. And then the final one here is how do you define happiness for yourself? I feel like it's always good to start your relationship with existential crises.

Yeah. You really want to nail it home that like when you date me, I'm going to make you really focus on all your problems. Yeah, that is that is that's a list right there of some stuff. Yeah, that's the thing. Cosmo. That's a list right there of some stuff. Yeah. That's a thing. Cosmo. Once again, in 10 years, nothing has changed. Absolutely nothing has changed.

But I have a quick news story. It's top tier. I have to do it very quick. All right. Chain smoking marathoner finishes in under three and a half hours, and he's done it before. That was this person smoking during the run? Yes.

Here he is. Let me show you. This guy doesn't look like. Yep. Yep. That's wow. Yep. That's... Wow. Yeah.

I mean, good on him, I guess. Yep. I'm not sure what he's trying to prove, but like, good on him. Hell no. Marathon runners are such a dedicated bunch that many fine-tune their breathing to maximize oxygen intake for 26.2 mile races but a 50 year old chinese man decided to take a more leisurely approach this month chain smoking his way through the jin zhang marathon in jiande china i said that wrong probably and he did it in under three and a half hours chen bangzian nicknamed uncle chen of course he was of course he's uncle ch. That is Uncle Chen, if I've ever heard of him.

Finished the arduous race on November 6th in 3 hours and 28 minutes, according to a certificate from race organizers first reported in English language by Canadian Running. Despite Chen's apparent aversion to oxygen, he came in 574th place out of about 1,500. He was like in the top third. His time was nearly an hour faster than four hour 29 minute average for finishing marathons uh photos of the quote grandpa have since gone viral on the chinese social media platform weibo they left digital onlookers in

such belief the marathon organizer shared his finishing certificate online to lay skepticism to rest so i guess that's him closing to the finish line i'm i'm i absolutely love this i i look smoking's bad for you but 50 year old chinese men smoking while running? Something about that. Hilarious. I don't know what it is. That's impressive. Yeah. He has this look. Here's the thing, though. He is, I would say, incredibly fit. Oh, yeah.

He definitely stays in shape. Despite the fact that he definitely is going to get some form of lung cancer, he is looking incredibly fit. So even though his lungs may not be tip-top shape, the rest of him, he's jacked. Like he is the kind of thin fit I think Crandor wants to be. That is definitely how I'd be. That is my thin fit right there.

Every muscle in him is visible. Yeah, that's pretty much how I am now. I'm getting there. Yeah, so I don't think I don't, you know, I'm sure it's not, again, long-term health good for you at all. Definitely not. But this guy, I think, could do a few more races before he goes down.

100%. Yeah. And there's your big news story of the day. All right. Well, that's it for us. Thanks so much for listening, watching, and enjoying this podcast. Crendor! Hit them with the socials. Socials, we got YouTube.com

slash Cox and Crendor podcast. All one word. All the podcasts are up over there. Go check them all out. Hit the bell, subscribe, be notified when these go up. Also, you can go to the YouTube.com slash Cox and Crendor.

That's where all the animations are. Do the same thing over there. You can go to the YouTube.com slash Cox and Crandor. That's where all the animations are. Do the same thing over there. You can drop comments. Comment your favorite part in the last 10 years of our podcasting. There you go. That's a good comment interaction. It's great. Fantastic.

Also, you can find us on Spotify, iTunes, SoundCloud, all those places. And you can find us on our main stuff. We got YouTube.com, Jesse Cox. YouTube.com slash Crendor. Twitter, Jesse Cox. Twitter, Crendor. Facebook, Jesse Cox. Facebook, Crendor.

Twitch, Jesse Cox. Twitch, Crendor. TikTok, Jesse Cox. TikTok. TikTok, Crendor. Crenclips, Coxclips. Warhammer, Crendor notorious Cox Instagram Kren door is taken and it's probably some more but that's it all right that's it for us see you next time bye everybody wait you didn't even do it

right I forgot it's been 10 years it's been 10 years. It's been 10 years. Ugh.