Cox n' Crendor Show - Episode 439 - Late Night Caveman
Episode Date: October 14, 2024The boys are back and this time Crendor listening to people talk in public sends Jesse down a rabbit hole of questions about relationships. At the same time we learn a lot about Crendor's sleeping hab...its and how his ancestors were late night people too. Then Jesse tries to pronounce French words. All this and more on a brand new Cox n' Crendor! https://lh-st.com/shows/12-20-2024-cox-n-crendor-chilluminati/ Go to http://uncommongoods.com/cox to get 15% off your next gift. Go to http://heroforge.com and use code CRENDOR until 11/15 to get 5% off all orders of Color-Printed Minis. #ad
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Today's episode is brought to you by Uncommon Goods. Uncommon Goods is going to help you find some
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party members. Oh right now let's jump into this podcast. Hello everybody it's time for Gax and Crendor! Gax and Crendor in the morning!
In the morning!
We're on Captain Long! Long! Long! Long! Long!
In 4 hour recording studio recording!
Recording!
Bip Bip! Wake your ass up!
It's Gax and crenda in the morning
Exciting whoa
Almost too exciting. I don't know if we can live up to that
Oh, we definitely can't unless you said egg sighting and this is gonna be a very egg focus podcast. Oh, I did
Eggs podcast oh I did eggs all right what kind of eggs do you typically order when
you're getting eggs none anymore I haven't had eggs in a while a great start
to the egg podcast tell me about eggs it's been so long well I usually alternate I'll go
scrambled sometimes or I go with the over medium used to over easy, but I like the over medium
Because you get a little more of like a hard-boiled egg feel but not full hard-boiled
It's like a medium if anything medium good on a sandwich
Yeah, you get a little bit of the wrong, but not too much. It's that it's going down your fingers
But it you know throw some bacon on there, put it on like a, I don't know, a bagel?
Whatever.
You have a great, that's a great sandwich.
Right on the bagel.
Right on there.
Right on there.
And then, uh, plus sometimes you say over medium, they just do it over easy anyway.
But like, whatever, I don't care.
I'll still, I'm still eating it.
I like eggs. Big fan. Right, from your I'm still eating it. I like eggs
Big fan right from your head down to your legs you like eggs everyone knows that about you. Yep. I like eggs
From my head down to do you remember those commercials I kind of do
Those are great like this guy's could come on the radio and be like, I like eggs! From my head down to my legs! That's great.
Which, that actually reminds me when last week we went out to breakfast
and there's always one table, it's very loud.
Like...
Oh great, I'm glad I reminded you of that table.
Cool, so cool.
It was three women and
probably their 40s talking about how
they love going on vacations and the
one was just like I'm going to Cane
Coon which I don't know if you want to
go right now so maybe wait maybe wait a
little bit.
Yeah.
Someone else was like, oh man, you got to go to the Bahamas.
The other one was like, oh no, no, we like going to this place.
They're like doing all that.
And then this one woman who was the loudest at the table was like, I just, I listen, people
love me.
As soon as I heard that, I was listen, people love me. As soon as I heard that I was like, oh Jesus.
Wait, so is this a separate conversation or in response to traveling?
This is separate.
So I, we heard them talking about traveling.
I thought they were like, I love Cancun, yeah well you gotta go to the Bahamas.
And she's like, people say.
Well it was like, I heard, we like sat down, it was like everyone was just you know normal
around us like alright and then just that one table was just like very loud. They weren't
very far away either so they were like, we heard them talk about vacations and so we
were like alright whatever. But then all of a sudden I hear her just like get as loud
as you can be and she just goes, and just people love me.
And I was like, oh, I gotta turn my attention now.
And then she was like, my one friend, oh my God,
we just, she always talks about how I'm her best friend
and she is with a man that is toxic.
And I just cannot believe it.
We have been telling her, you do not wanna marry this guy
but she's getting married
So we're going to the wedding and I was like
Okay, and then the the other
Women at the table were like yeah, that's not good. That's not good, and then she was like he is controlling her
He is saying like she wants this at the wedding
And he's like no you don't and we're like what you do not have to tell that and then
They're like that is toxic that is toxic which to be fair that is kind of toxic
Yeah, the idea of no you don't seems pretty toxic however
Yeah, I learned a long time ago to not take the one-sided story told by a friend of the
Also very true yep, I'm like
of the people. Yeah, that's also very true, yep. I'm like, hmmm, what's in it for you? Why are you so invested in this? Yeah, there's always two sides to a story, even if it's
not as, you know, one side may still be more right than the other, but. You know, he might
not have wanted it, but did he say, like, the way that she said it? Or is she interpreting
it her way to get the best response from her
friends you know what I mean yeah like he could uh he could have been like I don't know if you
want that which is much different than you don't want that you're playing the game of telephone
yeah yeah I always get a little suspicious when people are like let me tell you this hot goss
about someone else not this table yeah this was this was also, she was also someone that you knew, you could tell love being the
center of attention.
Because people love her.
Yeah, because people love her.
The fact that she had just said that was like, ugh, alright.
They were talking about other stuff, but at that point I was like, whatever, we started
talking about our own thing and eating.
Now I'm more concerned, I want to know more about the friend she
really in trouble like does the world need to save her from a bad guy or is
this just a bad friend yeah I don't know I have no answers yeah I'm I don't know
either like it might be it might be one of the situation maybe he is that guy
maybe he is like the that one get remember that time we were in I forgot where we were somewhere in LA and
then he was like dictating what she ate might even been at the mall uh yeah no I
definitely remember that and that was weird strange I don't know I'm not sure
how to react to it I'll be honest with you ladies who are listening right now
please give us your feedback because I would love to know I always think it's weird to order for someone else or to
Sort of say oh, they'll enjoy this but maybe they've been in relationship so long
He just knows but still I feel like the woman's voice is important, but I don't know what their relationship is
anyway, what I'm saying is it's very difficult out there to determine what people want from a relationship,
and sometimes people want different things, I guess.
And me, I want to make the person I'm with feel,
not just happy, but appreciated,
and feel like they have their own voice
and that kind of thing.
But I also know, and I've been on several dates in the past
where the person has been like,
no, you decide for me.
I'm like, I don't even know you.
What do you mean?
And so then I feel the pressure of having to make you happy, which is all I care about
in the end.
That is my driving force of relationships is making the person I'm with happy and doing
little acts of kindness, you know, like that kind of stuff where I just want the person
to feel appreciated and loved
And this is so stressful that is so stressful being like well choose for me if I choose that I'm wrong
I'm gonna hate myself like you can't do that to me. You can't do that to me
There's a lot that just came out right there. It doesn't happen in crendor in
30 years, I'm not gonna say 30 20
years of dating mm-hmm 30 I would be a little child that's not that's right
I was like 20 years of dating not once have I been at maybe that's what I mean
that's what I need not once I'm literally shipper someone was like here
I'm gonna make the choice usually it's like Jesse make the choice like I make choices all day
Someone is telling me what to do
That just ties back you want someone to tell you what to do
Yeah, like but also like a big buff mommy who will break me, but yeah, yeah, yeah all that
Yeah, yeah, yep
The main point I was getting at here was even with this LA person where you're like maybe, I think a lot of it ties into like the body language, the way people are saying things.
Like if you, I remember at that table, the woman did not look like she was like, yeah, he's just ordering ordering for me she looked like somebody that did not enjoy being around shocked like this guy
did not read the room and she was eyeing one thing and he was like she'll have
the salad yeah no it was very much a like she she was thrown off. She was like, uh, I don't like this. It was very much that
Yeah
So yeah, moral of the story is
There really is no more the moral of the story actually is
Everyone should go right now and buy tickets for Cox and Crenn door plus Chaluma naughty live in Chicago
December 20th tickets
are on sale right now. You'd be a fool not to go get them link in the description for
all of this below. Yeah, go right now. 35 bucks for two shows? One night? That's great
value. That's great value. And it's going to be a fun fun night and I imagine it is an 18 plus show because I figure Crendor and I will be fine but Mathis and Alex yeah
they're gonna try and bang aliens that's gonna that's the adult you know that's
yeah that's that's to a door for us yeah or yeah maybe even for me I might have
to skip that one yeah maybe I was gonna I
was gonna say so for toaster woman's
birthday we watched Hercules because she
wanted to watch Hercules I knew there
was a reason for your tweet yeah and as
we're watching it I was realizing that
the the carrier the pain and panic evil villain side characters really were just like us
like
Even the way they acted it was very much us what sucks is the gif you posted
He's doing the exact same grin smile that I do
smile that I do. It's so funny.
And it's not like even just their personalities, there's like goofy.
They're like out just being like,
geez, and then they're getting
controlled by the villain guy.
But they're like, yeah, screw that
guy. He never comes back like
they got Hercules shoes.
They got the sneakers.
Yeah, that's great.
Yeah, they they pretended to be the girl horse to trick the Pegasus horse. And they capture the Pegasus.
And then when they break out later...
That's something we would do. We would become a girl horse.
Yeah, but it's funny because at the end, even when the Pegasus discovers it's them,
I don't know which one you are, it's like you're
Payne, or yeah you're Payne, and then Payne's like, I thought you were a tract of horse
anyway, I wasn't just lying, I'm like that isn't Jesse Cox lying.
Yeah, I wasn't lying to you, I really didn't think you were beautiful, we were just paid
to take you to the next level, that's all.
Yeah, no, if you watch Hercules and just pretend
that's us you'll be like wow these really are the most
Hudson friend or Disney villains I've always said we'd be amazing sidekicks to
a villain yeah especially a Greek God yeah there's like a Greek God out there
who needs to goofball sidekicks for his villainy we are on your team
automatically yeah 100% as long as
you let us get up to our goofball antics yeah oh we gotta have the goofball
antics yeah they're like you need to kidnap the the prince will be like yeah
okay but then we have to have like a series of failures that are comically
hilarious yeah which shouldn't be too hard.
We have, in fact, never kidnapped anyone before,
so it'll be a learning experience.
Yeah.
So that was fun.
And then I also have a dream I had, I need to tell you.
It's a crazy dream.
So I wrote down.
I remember writing this down.
So I remember waking up, and I was like, I remember waking up and I was like I'm probably
going to forget this, this is probably going to seem crazy but I'm going to write it down
because I know it's going to be good.
So it's Sailor Moon Dream, two timelines.
Already amazing.
Yep, Sailor Moon Dream, two timelines, replicated to take over my body had to convince us to do thing
But other timeline broke and started warping back
Water drooling
Water drooling head breaking through reality with big head hiding under stairs and secrets and envelopes
sushi rice bones
What you need to be specific you're just saying words
and it sounds insane
yeah all right i'll put some relevancy
to it please do please so i remember
this was it i just remember sailor moon
was in this dream
ok i was just part of i don't know she
was good or evil but she was in this dream, okay? That was just part of it. I don't know if she was good or evil.
But she was in the dream.
And there was two timelines occurring.
And somebody was trying to get one of the timelines to mimic the other timelines so that they could like change time.
But there was something happening where the timelines were not matching up and so
reality started to break and so like the like people started like drooling water
like there's a head breaking through reality and we were like oh shit this is
a different timeline they're trying to trick us and they're like no is we? I don't know That's the thing
Okay, so you're
Alright
So you don't know who we is, who is they who's trying to trick you?
It could have been
Sailor Moon
Or, Sailor Moon was trying to help
And it was like some evil person
I don't know which one
If I
Like I can't remember But but it was one or the other
So then there was also secret envelopes hidden under the stairs
Which I think was to tell us or just everybody there that this is a different reality, right and then I
Don't remember the sushi rice bones. I kind of remember it, but I also don't I
Don't remember the sushi rice bones. I kind of remember it, but I also don't I
Guess I'm here's the thing I never in my life heard anyone combine the word sushi rice and bones
Yeah, and I don't know what that means. I don't know what I'm supposed to be thinking about is it
The way you said sushi rice sushi rice bones yeah makes it sound like the rice has bones yes I thought that as well
boy at the time of writing it I did not think that and it made sense but now I
can't even this would have been I'll say like four or five days ago.
But I mean like time wise.
Oh, right when I woke up.
So that would have been?
I think it was right when I woke up, it was like five, six hours into my sleep cycle and
then I fell back asleep for another like hour or two.
Okay, well I was trying to think
of what time that would be but knowing you it's a normal time it would have
been like 10 a.m. It probably was like 10 a.m. yeah maybe 10 30 a.m. I was gonna
say if it was normal sleep schedule like yeah that does seem like a 3 a.m. thought
but for you that's a 10 a.m. thought. That's a 10 a.m. thought, 100%.
Listen, when I had to wake up for the construction on our wall, which was like, whatever, it was like 8, 9, 10 a.m., whatever,
I was like, I was just, my body was like thrown off.
Like I was getting IBS, I was shitting myself, my body, I was like, ugh.
It was bad, and it took me like five days to recalibrate.
Now I'm normal again.
I think I'm just not made for the morning.
I'm really not.
Are you sure?
If you like, if you kept going to bed a little bit earlier every night, you might find that
you are.
I don't think so. I think I've found that my ideal wake up time is probably 1030
to 1130 a.m. Earlier than that, I actually never do well. Dude, I'm telling you. I'm
trying to imagine, so in this modern world we live in that is perfectly acceptable But I'm trying to imagine your ancestor like if it was Cren, but your caveman
How does that guy all the other cavemen are off hunting and they're like that's the night watch
Lally, I'm sleeping that always had a night watch
Did they have late night caveman
Did they have late night cavemen? Late night caveman is a great name for a bath.
It is. It says here, cavemen who are insomniacs would stay awake to watch for danger.
Okay. And then...
So you're just an ancestor of one of the late night cavemen?
I think so. Alright. And then, I mean, my grandfather lived to 95 years old and he would go to bed every day at 1am.
So it's permanently in your family. This is the thing where... I mean, do your parents, are they like this too?
My parents are not.
They're the complete opposite.
My parents wake up at like 3 a.m.
Do you think there'll be a time where you,
like the older you get, you'll end up like my dad,
where he's in bed by like seven but up at 3 a.m.?
Do you think it'll reverse over time?
I honestly don't think so.
I remember even in high school, I'd go to bed at midnight.
My dad apparently has never been a late person.
He's like, I'm always in bed early and waking up early.
And so was my mom.
I remember I used to edit videos and do everything
and then I'd be going to sleep
and my mom was making coffee when I lived at home.
Yeah, that's when I had to move back home.
My dad, I would be editing a video,
and he'd literally walk in the room,
be like, go to bed, what are you doing?
Go to bed, I'm like, what time is it?
And he's like, it's 4 a.m.
I'm like, why are you up?
He's like, I'm making breakfast.
That man would live a hobbit life.
My dad would wake up, drink coffee, and have toast,
then go back to bed, then up again and be like oh man
I gotta have breakfast. I was like you what you did already. He's like no no no didn't happen
Yeah, it's you do it some people are just super early morning
P. I think I'm just the opposite because I actually know what my mom's side of the family like her like my grandfather was that
Side and he was 1 a.m.
My aunt is
Actually, she goes to bed at like 1 a.m. To so I think she's also like that even my grandma my grandma's 99 years old and
She goes to bed at midnight
What does she do though? She just watches TV all right? I was trying to think of like
Eventually the older you get the more stuff you just can't do. Right. And you're like, well, I guess I'll just go to bed. But I guess in her case, she's invested in Nana's stories. She loves watching the TV.
And she likes the really shitty reality normal show like America's Got Talent and stuff
She likes those and then
It's it's always funny because we'll be like we think you're gonna make it to a hundred. She's like whatever
I think she's just done that seems like the attitude of most people who hit a hundred. They're like cool great
She's straight up the one time. She was like everybody. I know is dead
We're like I mean we're still here. She's like yeah, she might never what you cared about
Like I'm aware you're here. I know what I said
it's like I'm aware you're here. I know what I said it's uh I Don't know. Let's say once you hit that point. It is kind of crazy like everybody you grew up with and like new and like I
Mean even my grandpa like usually he was 95 like they were together like forever, so I mean even that
It's pretty crazy. I guess that's kind of like
that is pretty crazy. I guess that's kind of like when they tell the tales of a vampire or an immortal right and like that's supposed to be the thing with living forever is that everyone you
know is gone so your existence is kind of like you know sad right and that's fine but I disagree
I would love it I would I would have so much fun as an immortal. People
would be like, you can never find love, for they die. I'd be like, I'll find new love.
Shit. There's someone else out there. I can love many people. What's the problem here?
It's fine. Let's go. I'd live my life. I'd actually put a lot of money in the bank, because
then in a future lifetime, I'd be a billionaire. Come on, man. Plus'd I'd actually put a lot of money in the bank cuz then in a future lifetime
Maybe a billionaire come on man
Plus I could then live on one of those islands with like the rich people when the wars break out
and I'll hide from the world I
just imagine
8,000 year old Jesse Cox and just dating just some random
Woman who's like wow you're like 8,000 years old and
then you're just like what do you want to eat and she's like I don't know and
you're like oh my god
I turned to camera and I'm like I should never become a mortal
what a fool I've been
I'm good
It's thousands of years
No I've been... I've gone... It's been thousands of years.
No...
I should have become a late night caveman.
You should have become a late night caveman, yeah.
It's uh...
It would be a great sitcom.
You're just like the immortal 8000 year year old guy and then constantly having to live with
like every generation.
The best part about that would be if there ever was a war and we're all like reverted
to sticks and stones.
Being 8,000 years old and having the knowledge of like entertainment would be like, all right
Ugg, Zugg, I'm going to make a late night talk
show called Late Night Caveman.
They'll be like, what do you mean?
Like long ago, there were these things called late night
programs, and people would have guests on,
and they'd say jokes, and they're like, Ugg, no, like this.
Ugg wants sleep.
And I'm like, well, yeah, well, some people don't.
They're my late night cavemen.
That's why we're calling it Late Night Caveman. And they'll'm like, well yeah, well some people don't. They're my late night cavemen, that's why we're calling it late night cavemen.
And they'll be like, this stupid, like bit from podcasts,
seven thousand years ago.
This is...
Okay, wait. Now I'm like thinking about this.
What would happen... Oh boy. What would happen if the
earth just like got hit by the sun or
like the sun blew up? Like would you still continue living? Like how would that
work? Great question. I imagine depending on society's progress either I would have
fled on one of those missions into space or I just get vaporized by the Sun I guess I
don't like I don't know it depends on the level of immortality right is this
one of those things where if I get thrown out into the coldness of space
I'm still alive or do I die like everyone else yeah are you like an elf
yeah war the rings elf or something yeah my do I just live a very long time and it seems like immortality?
Or is this straight up like Wolverine where I regenerate?
And even though I might die, my body's constantly regenerating.
Yeah.
So I wouldn't necessarily be dead.
Being an elf, like Lord of the Rings style, that's probably the best one because you're still like healthy.
Right? You're still kind of young You're looking good. I mean elves
Age like they elves they just live a long long time. They're not immortal per se
Although that's a fantastic question. How immortal are the elves in Lord of the Rings? Yeah
So I mean look at Bilbo. He had the he had that that magic and then boom he got super old elves are
Functionally immortal because they have limitless serial longevity. Oh
But true immortality is not a thing they have
Okay, elves are made of disease and can recover from wounds that would kill a mortal
Elves are bound to Arda until its end So like you know they're bound to the world basically. Yeah so it's
they're essentially they can be immortal unless they're like killed by like
getting stabbed in the heart or something or actually like killed in
war or like anything like that. Yeah Elves can be killed in battle.
And also, they can, apparently, according to this,
if they cannot be with someone they love,
they lose the will to live and become a shade.
What?
That's what I'm saying.
I guess they slowly become a shade of their former selves.
They can't be with their loved ones.
I didn't know that.
But also the humans in Lord of the Rings.
Well, I guess like Aragorn and the people who were on whatever the hell that island's
called, the one that was like Lord of the Rings Atlantis.
Those people live very long as well, but they're not immoral.
They're just like very long-lived humans.
I see I think I'm not sure exactly what his age is but I know that
Aragorn isn't like a 30 year old but he just looks it but he's like 70 or 80
right yes we are not Lord of the Ring scholars so don't take our word for it
there's an Aragorn also like he's like part elf or part something?
He's uh he's from that like I said he's from that magic human land the island
that sank beneath the waves. Oh okay I see. That's where all the Isilador people
are from I don't know what the hell that place is called I want to say Volantis
but I know that's not true. Maybe it is Maybe it is
What is no volantis is game of Thrones?
Totally different place completely different location different world entirely that is
We're gonna get on so many people being like oh my god
Oh well Oh Well
Yo, by the way, we played our Baldur's Gate three goblins amazing. It was great. I didn't think we have more than one session
I thought we'd die, but we're still going. We're still alive somehow. We did not
We had we got knocked out a bunch, but no one died. We managed to keep everyone alive
Yeah, and the one time I thought we were gonna die,
they threw us in prison.
That's what I, I was like, yeah, we're dead.
And yeah, we just got thrown in prison.
I thought that was a wipe, but they put us, you know what?
I'm fine with that.
That's fine.
Yeah, yeah, that's fine.
But now that town has a bunch of dead bodies in it
and there's just a bunch of loot
and we are not getting access to that loot.
It might be gone.
That loot could be gone forever.
It might be gone, but we to check again yeah it's heartbreaking yeah
I didn't know Dodger only she didn't even beat act one oh what a crazy what a
noob what a complete noob admittedly I didn't think she'd be the murder hobo
she's definitely killing lots of people for the sake of killing people
Yes, I mean she is thinking like a goblin though
I do like yeah so
You see you're you're still playing the game as if you're trying to to unlock things and like collect stuff
You can't do that. Clearly. We're not doing that. I mean we've we left lazel in a cage. We left
Uh, what's-his-face, the wizard
guy Gael, we left Gael in the portal, we killed Astarion, we killed Will, Karlaiq is not gonna
have anything to do with us, Shadowheart we killed instantly on the ship and took her
loot. Really I don't know what the hell our team's gonna be we need to get we need to get minthar
We have to have at least one person for a four-man group. Otherwise, we're this is bad news for us
We do have wargs. So I mean we we can summon works. That's true. The wargs are like a fourth member
Yeah, except sometimes they just stand there and don't follow you.
That's true as well.
It's part of the mod glitch or something.
Yeah, sometimes my wargs just stay back and I'm like, oh, guess I gotta resummon you and
then I can't.
So yeah, so it was fun.
That was a good time.
Yeah.
What else have you done this week?
I have a lot of games on my desktop that I've been trying to get through. Like for example,
I gave Starfield a shot, mostly because it was a brand deal, but also because I've never
played it before and I was like, yeah, all right, I mean, if you guys are going to pay
me, I'll play it for sure. The stuff I did was super fun compared to what I heard about the game or what the
vibe was, people talking about it.
Obviously, I think the reason why people were clowning on the game for being boring in parts
is that a lot of the quests seem boring.
It's like, Hey, go over there and scout stone for me.
I'm like, no, I'm not going to do that.
Right. But then the quest where I did find interesting things to do, see, we're totally
fun. Like I got this one where I found this communication. It was like, Hey dude, if you
think you're really skilled, come to this secret location in a far away system. And I was like,
okay. So I went there to see what it was
and suddenly it becomes a quest
in which you discover basically the space bat cave,
the layer of this hero called the Mantis.
And there's a bunch of trials you have to overcome.
And when you do it in the end,
you get the Mantis's gear and the Mantis's ship.
And now in space, I'm basically space Batman. I was like,
this is cool as hell. That was super fun. Why the hell? Like that was, no one told me
about that. That was a fun thing I did. Mind you, there's another quest that was like,
Hey, go there and talk to Julie about discovering new worlds to place a home on.
I'm like, nah, not gonna do that.
And I feel like that's the thing is this is one of those
where they included all these everywhere you go,
people like, hey man, come help me.
I'm like, nah, no, I'm not.
I'm on a mission, I'm gonna go do this.
And I feel like people got bogged down
in the sideways nature of the game
rather than just sticking to the story.
And obviously the story could suck.
I only played like eight hours of it,
but I don't know what I played seemed fine.
But yeah, I don't know what the other parts of the game are.
You know, the parts that I see people like,
I went to go look for planets
and all I did was walk around these damn planets.
It was super boring.
I was like, I didn't do any of that I went from main
mission to main mission murdering my way through the game and I was like yeah
this seems fine it was alright I mean it's not like I don't think it's the
best work Bethesda's ever done for sure but it was alright it sounds alright
I mean for everything I saw I was like it was all right. That sounds all right. I mean, for everything I saw, I was like, it was all right.
Yeah, I don't know that this is my glowing endorsement
to pick it up, but it's not a bad game.
Yeah.
I mean, that's the thing.
There's a lot of games where they're not bad games,
but they're not like, I gotta go play this game right now
games.
Especially if they're gonna demand
80 hours of your time. Yeah. Like maybe it's not the one to pick up. Maybe there's other ones to
pick up. I feel like once you start hitting that point where it's like we have a world that's got
eight billion hours of open world exploration or something it's just like you hit a point where
everything just kind of feels the same even if it is different.
I want to see you play,
speaking of the same but different,
I want to see you play either a,
either platform eight or exit eight or Shinkansen zero.
These are games where you're trapped in a repeating
either hallway or train car or whatever and you
have to spot the differences in order to escape. I would love to see you try to
spot the differences. So it's like one of those old magazine things? Except
sometimes the difference is an image looks weird or there's a face outside the
car looking at you and sometimes a creepy
goop thing appears and starts moving towards you and it's like, nope, I'm leaving. This
is not normal. It's that kind of thing.
Ah, I see.
It's not really horror. It's not scary. Every once in a while there might be like something
that jumps out, but it isn't like a scary game. It's just a, what the hell am I supposed to be looking for? Like, I was playing Shin Kassen Zero the other day,
and I couldn't find what the difference was,
but when I looked at the exit,
there was like a face staring at me,
and I was like, mm-mm, I'm not going through that exit,
this is some bullshit.
I just turned around and walked away,
and it was like, good job, you!
So, that kind of thing.
I think it'd be very funny,
I think your stream would love it. Yeah, that does sound pretty fun. I'd check that out.
Yeah, there's a bunch of them. They're super cheap. They're very cheap games.
And you know, you could be amazing and get through it all. I think I did
Exit 8, the first run I ever did. Took me 20 minutes to get through it. Once I figured out
what the mechanics were, I like figured out all the puzzles.
But then, you know, Shin Kansen took me, I don't know, 50 minutes to get through.
Because it kept screwing me. I'd be like, I can't find the problem.
And I'd be like, there must be none. And then I'd leave and it'd be like, reset, idiot.
I'm like, what do you mean? I clearly, yeah.
So it might be interesting to see you try to
suss it out.
Yeah, I'd give it the old college try.
You should. Also, Kingdoms 2 Crowns came out.
Oh yeah, that game.
Yeah, they released a new version that is, oh, it's a DLC, but it's like Ancient Greece.
Very cool. Played a little bit of that last night.
I got to the point where like the monsters are really big and angry and nasty and I still haven't unlocked stone.
So they're just like tearing through my kingdoms and I'm like, I don't want to restart but like I might have to.
So you've just been playing games, is that it? Yeah dude, yeah that's it.
I've been writing a script for a video, but I'm playing games right now, trying to get
through all these because Next Fest I think starts next week and there's a bunch of games
I want to do demo-wise, but we'll probably end up doing them for Scary Game Squad and
so I just, I don't have, I'm trying to get stream time done this week because next week probably will be lacking the streams. Oh also I played wedding witch
Wait, what wedding witch? I think I told you about this wedding. I did on stream last night wedding, which is
That game that's like vampire survivors except you play. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I know
Everyone couldn't believe it existed and it's fun.
It's a fun game.
Also I beat the hardest mode last night.
Feeling pretty proud.
I was also saying what's Next Fest?
Oh Next Fest is the Steam thing they do where games that are coming soon will release a
bunch of demos.
And so it's free demos for a bunch of different games
and you just download them for free and you can play.
And so you can get sort of like a taste of video games.
And this next fest is a lot of horror games,
so that means Scary Game Squad's gonna have a lot to play.
Ah, I see.
So I'll probably caught up doing that next week.
So I'm trying to get as much stream time
in this week as possible.
I see, okay, It's good. You know
what else is good? Uncommon goods! Oh that worked pretty well actually. Yeah.
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You know, it's loud.
Well, they have this thing on there that's a frog
and the top of the frog, it's open
so you can put your phone in it.
But then the frog, it's him holding his mouth open or like ah
And it's supposed to echo and reflect the volume of your phone out from the frog and that's what I got
I'm so I want that in my bathroom. I want to put that my phone in there the frogs is gonna be like
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All right, let's go to traffic.
We've got the CRENDOR outside traffic out there.
Oh man, traffic is actually pretty insane.
But when isn't it? except for when it's not
you got a whole bunch of stuff happening a lot of a lot of traffic especially in
traffic town a lot of traffic in traffic town is there actually a traffic town I
need to look this up thank you thanks crend let's go over to Crendor at the weather desk
potentially for traffic town. Hey welcome back to the weather
I'm looking for traffic town by the way if you couldn't there's like if I type traffic into weather
looks like there's
traffic chock traffic choke chock a
lot in Nepal and then there's trafficcanti in Italy.
Maybe, maybe, okay, I went to trafficcanti,
and it just says Sant'Erasmo Bergamo, Italy.
What is trafficcanti mean?
Oh, trafficcanti means traffickers.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Wow. mean oh traffic Conti means traffickers I feel like maybe that's the wrong thing
well they named tires city after traffickers I don't think they did that
might just be a location in the city or a restaurant I found a tattoo parlor that traffic conti art which I assume is their traffickers in
the art Milan there is their tattoo parlor there are movies called traffic
conti I don't know how I feel about that okay well did you find anything
remotely similar or should we just go to where traffic conti is I see doesn't look like there's that much there anyway let's you
know what I'm just gonna take a weather request from somebody you know what glad
we glad we just gave up it's all about just giving up and moving on we got one
for do ouranes, France
we just had a storm so weather's going nuts right now
that's near Italy. It's pretty close
right? Sure. France is close I mean it's close
ish yeah. I mean all Europe's pretty close there
alright there we go D war the warren is France
Currently it is 53 degrees humidity 89%
pressure
29.46 inches visibility 6 miles winds 17 miles an hour 828
a.m. Sunrise 739 p.m. Sunset dew point 53 UV index currently zero and a waxing crescent moon
moon thursday 59 degrees partly cloudy friday 60 degrees partly cloudy saturday 62 with am
showers sunday 63 cloudy monday 64 cloudy tuesday 64 showers wed Wednesday 63 showers Thursday 60 with
showers and Friday 61 with showers a lot of clouds lot of rain I'm I'm profoundly
excited about this place because it is both a port city but also an old city.
Or I'm not sure what you would call this.
Oh yeah.
But it is old.
And some of the things it says to do in the area around it,
this is my favorite one.
The number one thing, a walking tour called
Discover the Best of Breast.
Love that.
They also have tasting of seaweed cheeses what does that mean cheese what is a seaweed cheese yeah
what is a seaweed cheese we offer you a unique experience tasting local original
seaweed cheeses I guess it's cheese but with seaweed added. Damn. That sounds wild.
I mean, yeah, it just looks like cheese that you would see that you would spread on stuff,
but it's got seaweed in it.
Huh.
They got sailing, day trips, six day French cooking course.
They got Gus Burger.
Oh, this place is like, you can get a small, medium, large, or XL burger.
Yeah.
Oh, this place probably slaps because the menu is literally just burgers plus toppings
and then fries that you can get different ways. And then a combo for burger and fries.
And then kids meals. And I guess they also serve a muffin, donut, and a beignet. I can't read what that says.
Yeah, a little dessert there. Yeah, that looks good. Whenever it's that simplified, you know
they're doing it.
Hell yeah. Gus Smash Burgers, dude, this place looks great.
Oh man.
Plus, it's messed up. The window for this restaurant literally looks out onto water.
It's gorgeous.
Oh yeah. But then there's Mia Pizzeria right at Krendor.
I don't like. No, I'm sorry, that's Ma Pizzeria. Ma Pizzeria. I'm going to let you know, Krendor,
don't look. Don't look, dude. I don't want to look. These pizzas do not look like pizzas.
I don't know why the Europe loves those pizzas. Yeah, these pizzas that are like sad pizzas. Yeah
Does not look
Mean listen, it's like
It's cloudy and rainy every day. Maybe that's why open image a new tab
This is one of the pizzas please describe to someone this this pizza sucks. Oh my god. That is, that's even worse than I thought.
That's what I'm saying.
That's like, not only is it just weird toppings,
but it's like cut weird, the like cheese looks off.
There's like.
The cheese kind of looks like they melted
a bunch of squares of American
cheese on top. Yeah, it's it does not look appealing. It just it looks sad. Yeah, the
dough looks sad. What's even weirder about it is that the toppings are exactly five pieces
of bacon and then full on ass potatoes sprinkled around and it makes none of it
makes sense to me I don't know what I'm looking at I guess I wouldn't go to
France to get pizza I guess is the lesson here I don't know to be fair I
don't know many people be like I gotta go to France to try the pizza yeah I'm
looking at that pizza place down the street. Equally weird. Equally shocking.
Come on! You can't! Alright. Another, I'm gonna leave this for you to explain. This
makes no sense to me. This is insulting. Alright. They got full on shrimp or prawns or whatever.
What the hell? This is a seafood pizza where they've included on top of the pizza full ass head and tail on prawns
But also still in shell muscles
Yeah like what that's
What is the point of this?
Just take them out
Do you think because they're close to Italy this is them like
Ha ha ha fools
Pfft
We spit on your food. You know it might be. Some of these are atrocious.
Knowing some of those European rivalries. I gotta get away from the pizza. We gotta go to like
Chez Jeunine. Yeah, or like they got some good baked goods. Yeah, restaurant
et fleur de y. Yeah, alright, see this looks, these are beautiful dishes.
Yeah, alright, so pizza is not the way to go.
Everything else, everywhere else I'm clicking, is gorgeous.
Yeah, everything else is great.
You got some fantastic looking pastries.
You got some, oh man, these look real good.
This is that boule genre de Plomarche.
De Plomarche.
Yeah, that's pretty good.
There's a place in the world where you can get a bunch of different things.
You can get a bunch of different things. You can get a bunch of different things. This is that boule genre de Plomarch. De Plomarch.
Yeah, that's pretty good.
There's a place that is just a...what you would expect, like a just French bread shop.
And everything there looks so good and it's making me aggravated.
French bread. Somebody could call it a bakery yeah I'm not sure if this one is a bowling a degree love you's do me near Paul David
sounds like you're speaking my apologies to everyone in France this is why
they're so mean to us
This is why the French hate tourists because of people like me
Can I excuse me you know who the ball and a gorilla muse do my near Paul David is
We're gonna have to ship you out right now
You're now welcome back
Great I love this this is a lot to see here
Yeah, no this place is great. Wait. Did you look at lay express pizza?
Is that one of the ones you saw was that the shit? Oh, yeah? No, don't worry
That's gonna be equally depressing to you don't oh
Yeah, that's oh
pueblo del papito? Mexican food?
Yo, alright. For the most part, it kinda seems whack, but...
There's one giant dish that's like a skewer of meat.
And that looks delicious.
You can't really screw up a skewer of meat.
That's true. I mean, you could. You could undercook it.
You're right. You're absolutely correct. But yeah, some of the vibe of, so alright,
to give you an example, this is why I try to avoid Mexican food in England as well.
I'm looking at what appears to be fajitas. Right.
Except it is, you know in the States we get it like on a sizzling plate or something, or we get something with it.
This is straight up two tortillas rolled up next to a bowl of meat and vegetables, and
then a bunch of french fries and a ludicrous number of sides.
Yeah, that's not right.
Yeah, something's off about this. I never think french fries plus
Mexican no not at all unless you go to the Mexican place to get a burger and fries in which case not a bad choice
Some of the best burgers and fries in LA come from like the small Mexican restaurant down the street But no, this is now with fajitas. All right. Well, that's it for weather. Yeah, let's go to sports sports
Welcome to the sports desk here's sports here's
sports oh yeah also watch out for that hurricanes hit in Florida that's nice
be safe be safe hopefully by the time you hear this you'll be fine and not
harm's way still yeah um currently the Detroit Tigers are beating the Cleveland Guardians, 3-0 in the
seventh inning, series tied 1-1. You've got the Padres beat the Dodgers yesterday to go
up 2-1 in that series, hey-oh. Royals, Yankees currently tied at 1, but they play later,
and the Phillies, Mets currently Mets up 2-1 in that series, they're playing right now.
If the Mets win, they move on, hey-ww. So that's baseball playoffs currently going on. I do like baseball
playoffs. It's the most fun baseball you can have. NBA preseason has started up, so
that's been pretty cool. And then hockey actually just started their regular
season up as well. They had games yesterday where St. Louis beat Seattle,
Florida beat Boston, and the Utah Hockey Club beat Chicago, of course. We lost to
the Utah Hockey Club, which is actually just the former Arizona Coyotes, which much better name, much better logo,
much better everything, really.
Then the Utah Hockey Club?
Yeah, the Utah Hockey Club is just a circle
that says Utah with hockey above it and club below it.
Is that because they haven't decided on a name yet?
I believe so, and I hope so. Or are they just gonna stick
with it because that seems like the most Utah thing in the world not to name your team and
just call them the Utah Hockey Club. Yeah that's... So people don't know! Yeah people,
what if they mistake us for another team? It's also just very plain Boring I love yeah, I love I love the fact that they are currently 1-0
It is it's pretty funny fan vote for Utah's NHL team
Amid the Arizona coyotes moved to Utah became clear team owners would have enough time to rebrand the franchise before
2425 usually takes around 18 months to design a new logo
Okay, so that's probably why
When choosing the Utah hockey team name they surveyed in May there were 20 options
By June June 6 the following six options emerged which were the Utah
Blizzard the Utah hockey club the Utah Mammoth
Utah Outlaws the Utah Venom and the Utah Yeti
Utah Mammoth, Utah Outlaws, the Utah Venom, and the Utah Yeti. Utah Yeti, Mammoth, or Blizzard are the only options. Those are... Yeah, they're right there. Although, with
that said, I do like the idea of, before they come up with a real name, getting merch that
says... Like, if you're in Utah and you're a fan, you gotta get a Utah Hockey Club shirt,
right? Yeah. Just for... You gotta for you to have that as a thing.
Yeah like you'd be a fool not to have that. Yeah I think the Utah Yeti that's
just because it's kind of like... It rolls off the tongue the alliteration yeah. Yeah it rolls off
the tongue you could have like a cool Yeti mascot it's like hockey is just
Utah Yeti I feel like is my go like the blizzard sounds like a double-a team name it kind of does yeah it's not
exciting the Yeti that's a mascot I like the mammoth as well however I think the
Yeti just flows better so I'd probably go to all mammoths yeah they're like
slow and furry you tall Yeti always mysterious and you could also you could
be like goofy too if you make the mascot.
Yeah, it does say the distinction goes to Utah Yeti since members of the franchise keep referencing it as the desert news reported.
It sounds like it's gonna be the Yeti, but I don't know said Utah hockey club captain.
So it seems like they want Yeti.
Yeah, I want to see like imagine this is why why hockey needs this the Yeti versus the Kraken dude
Think about think about this oh
I'm thinking yeah, yeah, that would be great. I'd love that
We need more
Cryptids in our sports we really do the West Virginia Mothman
We really do the West Virginia Mothman
And then in football NFL we got the Buffalo Bills in first the Ravens and the Steelers tied in first
Houston Texans in first the Kansas City Chiefs in first the
Washington commanders at four and one in first place which I wanted them to be the Washington hogs I believe was the Red Hogs Hogs or something. And they did not choose that. Extremely disappointing.
Yeah, it's so dumb.
Commanders? That's trash.
Hogs? Hilarious and awesome.
Worst part? Their mascot is a hog.
So like, it would have just made all the sense in the world and they didn't do it.
Just really dumb.
Vikings in first.
The Falcons and Buccaneers tied in first, but the Falcons
have the edge because they won the tiebreaker, and the Seahawks in first. And still plenty
of weeks to go, but those are the current NFL standings and that is sports.
Alright, what is our fact of the day? Fact of the day. Fact of the day fact of the day fact of the day
your signature could reveal personality traits a 2016 study says
isn't this just like that thing where they would study
like the
is this proven? this feels like one of those things
that I feel like used to be
a science but then people are like you can't
you can't use that to determine personalities
like in the in the what the hell is that damn a science, but then people are like, you can't. You can't use that term personalities.
What the hell is that damn movie? Sherlock Holmes with Robert Downey Jr. He uses that
to deduce what's wrong with Moriarty. He's like, the swoop of your J is a, you know,
that kind of thing.
Yeah. Let's see. It says, among men, a larger signature correlates with higher social bravado and among women a bigger signature correlates with
narcissistic traits
That almost seems sexist where the man does it it's fine your is bravado, but woman doesn't narcissist
That is
Where is this study? I need to say where's their references taken by
man's journal weekly
ok here we go
surprisingly so ok read more they don't even provide any references there's no
like study to link all right this shit's dumb
Yo, what the shit's bacteria on your skin cause your itches
Not like this don't I don't need this right now. I got too much stuff going on. Now I'm starting to itch.
Now I got it. Now I'm scratching. Stop. This is... Don't do this.
Specifically, bacteria known as Staphylococcus aureus can release a chemical that activates a protein in our nerves.
This sends a signal from our skin to our brains, which our brain perceives as an itch.
I'm sure there's other reasons as well. I don't like that at all.
She's telling me every time I got an itch it's because I got bacteria on me. That's cool. I
don't think it's every time. I think it's some of the times. Yeah. Many, many of the times. Yeah.
Great. Fun. So there you go. Cool. Well, learn that. what kind of questions do the audience have for us?
illustrious sirs today dear illustrious sirs with tears in my eyes
I ask you this question mustard or mayo. Oh mustard always I
Wouldn't say always I think there's plenty of times where mayo is pretty good, especially if you're doing a olies
Right that garlic a olie essentially or garlic I think there's plenty of times where mayo's pretty good, especially if you're doing aiolis, right?
Does it get that garlic aioli?
Essentially mayo and garlic.
But I wouldn't want the aioli anyway.
What?
Like, I very much don't like mayo-based things.
Like, if I'm gonna do a tuna salad, for example,
I'll put in the minimal amount of mayo required
to get it to stick together.
Otherwise, I don't, I'm not a fan of like, I think it's because people put too much
mayo on stuff and I became grossed out by it. I mean that makes sense. I do
think people put way too much mayo on a lot of things. I'm like you, I like a
small amount of just any type of sauce. Like really any. If they overdo the
sauce I'm like what is this? Like I'd rather get it on the side and do my own amount absolutely big same I think the reason
why I say mustard is because I can think of more things I'd willingly put
mustard on and there are different types of mustard too so I'm not just thinking
yellow but there I put mustard on more things than I would mayo right like I
also I would choose to use a honey
mustard over dipping for a french fry than mayo any day. Yeah no I I think
mustard I like mustard a lot still some of the most there's like different types
of mustards like the deli mustard is good on some things but I don't really
like it on other things it has to, it has to help the food taste
better. Right, but in general if I'm making a sandwich, I'd rather put a mustard based
something on it. Like there's a really great horse radish mustard that has a little German
man on it. Yes! Yes! Yes! And I'll put that on sandwiches all the time. I think you might
have the same mustard as me. I love it, he he's a little German man on it he's like oh I love my mustard yeah I need
the I need to find this so I think we are talking about the same one hold on
is that a little green hat I think yes oh I'm worse right horse radish mustard German let's see here is he oh
Hoffer yeah, Engel offer yeah, dude. Yep. It's so good. I love that I have the Engel offer like just creamy style horseradish as well for like five minutes or something
Oh, it's delicious. It's great. Yeah, so I have that, big fan of it.
I'm sure there are other versions
that you can probably find that are equally as good,
but for some reason, every time I'm at a deli
in the delicates, if you have a grocery store
or like a local cheese and you know,
like that kind of place, You'll find it there.
And it always works well, love it, good stuff.
All right, that's pretty good.
We'll do one more.
Dear illustrious sirs, with tears in my eyes,
I ask you this question.
If you guys got a one-time opportunity
to travel back in time and become pirates together
on a pirate ship, would you do it?
You would go on a quest to find a lost treasure
you're allowed to bring back to the present but you're not
allowed to tell anyone in the present about it afterwards I don't think I
would and I have to sail with Crendor on the open seas and none of us have
training the only good side is we get a treasure but the downside is can we ever
if we can't tell anyone about the treasure, how do we sell it to make money
from the treasure?
Yeah, there's a lot of things, like you'd have to sell it, but they'd be like, where
did you get this from? And you'd be like, I don't know.
I can't tell you. It's like, but this belonged to the queen. Like, well, I don't know. Like,
we'd have been jailed. No, this seems like a bum deal. I'm going to say, in theory if I was a skilled salesperson I
Whatever seaman I would maybe consider it
But Krendor and I on a boat as pirates back in time we would die
We'd either get eaten by some sort of like shark or thrown overboard
We'd get killed by the other pirates
like shark or thrown overboard, we'd get killed by the other pirates.
We'd roll into port.
Crenna and I would roll into port in our ship,
crash into the dock,
so you have no idea how to stop the damn thing.
Hop off and be like, hello fellow pirates,
we're looking to go on a treasure hunt.
We'd be killed instantly and they'd just take our boat.
Yeah, or we'd get a scurvy.
That bed probably.
True, yeah, no, we would. We are not made for, even a hundred years ago.
We would end badly.
Dude, I can barely survive in the modern times, you kidding me?
Yeah, 1920s Jesse Cox would not, I don't know how, I don't know what would happen to me.
I have no discernible talent.
I would just, I'd be working in a coal mine
Yeah, I'd be I'd be dead
So yeah there we go yeah there you go no we pass on your on your offer sir
Yeah, big news story of all right big news or the day
This one actually correlates with that it didn't even line up that way, it just randomly happened. Treasure hunt for buried golden statue encrusted with diamonds ends after 31 year search that captivated a nation.
It wasn't this nation.
No. A popular hunt that had people searching for 31 years for buried treasures finally come to an end.
Dubbed On the Trail of the Golden Owl, the search captivated 10,000 in France.
Yo, this lines up as well!
Wow, what a perfect episode.
Wow.
Uh, who joined the quest to find a statue made of an owl made of gold, silver, and diamonds,
buried somewhere in the country in 1993.
gold, silver, and diamonds buried somewhere in the country in 1993. The challenge was based on a book by Regis Hauser who buried the statue said to be worth
$165,000.
To find it, participants had to solve 11 puzzles from the book and then find a resolve find and resolve a 12th hidden puzzle which led to a token
which revealed the location of the grand prize the announcement that the token
had been located was made Thursday on discord don't go digging warn the
message which was written by Michael Becker who crafted the prize statue and
also illustrated the book on which the hunt was based.
We confirm that the Golden Owl counter mark was unearthed last night.
It is therefore useless to go digging on the location you assumed to be the cache.
Well done to the finder of the owl. Huge congratulations are due, he added.
I hope we learn the finder's name in due course and finally find the answers to the clues. I'm so interested in this because online I'm seeing a lot of claims that the Golden
Owl statue was in the guy's possession the entire time and seized as part of a liquidation
of his assets.
What?
That's what I'm saying here.
There were lawsuits filed what hell yeah huh you
know that maybe maybe it wasn't the real one maybe it was a statuette version of
the real one oh yeah maybe maybe that's yeah because apparently it was the
created 11 paintings for the book as well as the final
prize, the Golden Owl statue. The statue weighed just 10 inches. All right, right. And Tyler
made a gold and silver with diamonds. In 1939, the Owl was estimated to be 150,000, now it's roughly 231,000.
Also they made a replica of bronze, which is buried somewhere in France.
Oh. Okay.
Interesting.
Is that just randomly buried?
And then there are a bunch of riddles.
The riddles were like all sorts of crazy things
in this book.
Yeah, I wonder what the riddles are.
So this is one riddle, as an example.
Okay.
Yeah, I wonder what the riddles are. So this is one riddle as an example.
Okay.
My first, first half of the first of the first age
precedes my second and third seeking their way.
My fourth is inspired, my fifth is enraged,
but without protest follows my fourth and the Roman alpha.
My sixth is hidden at the very limits of eternity.
My seventh standing splits his venom
to find my all
Just be wise because the truth in truth will not be a Devon's affair
And
I guess
The answer is
burge Borges burgies I guess the answer is borgies?
Don't know how to say this word.
Dude, I'd suck at riddles.
But basically each one of those sentences
is one of the letters.
So a great example is,
my seventh standing spits his venom.
So it would have the S of a snake, right? Which is the last
letter. And then the limits of eternity and E, because that's the eternity is E. The way
he spelled it in the book is an E at the beginning and E at the end, I believe.
Right, I believe. I see. Right, like, but without protest follows the fourth
and the Roman alpha.
So like, it's the way to spell things, right?
What's that kind of thing?
Yeah, I have no idea.
That sounds crazy.
Yeah.
Well, that's the big news story of the day.
All right, well that's it for us.
Thanks so much for listening and watching.
I'm gonna join this podcast, Grand Order of the Sozals.
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on YouTube, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, that's it.
Okay, well, that's it for us, thanks so much.
We'll see y'all next time, and as always, wooo, to be continued.