Cox n' Crendor Show - Episode 454 - CowaBunga Bangkai

Episode Date: January 26, 2025

The boys are back and this time Crendor is a sleepy boy, for reasons that make entirely too much sense. Meanwhile Jesse stresses out over a random bug in his new apartment because he's losing his mind. Then the boys ask the real questions, like, can you review a review? All this and a big stinky flower on a brand new Cox n' Crendor! Go to http://factormeals.com/cox50off and use code cox50off to get 50% off your first box plus free shipping.

Today's episode is brought to you by Factor. Factor is going to deliver those good meals right to your home. Now let's jump to this podcast! Hello everybody it's time for Ghost in the Morning! This is Ghost in the Morning! In the morning! We're broadcasting live, live, live, live, live! In 4 hour 40 studio recording! Recording! Beep beep! Wake your ass up!

It's time for the next crepto in the morning! Beep beep beep beep! We're going into the morning! Hello everybody! This is the new guy, CREPTO, in the morning! Dude? Yeah? I am... so tired. You are telling me?

Yeah. Well, why are you tired? I am so tired. You are telling me. Yeah. Well, why are you tired? Why do you think we've been working hard the last couple of days? We've been putting in time. In fact, today we uh... Alright, let me preface this by saying, when I say work hard, I mean Jesse Krendel will work hard. I don't mean we were in a factory working 26 hours. No, nor were we in the coal mines. Yeah, we talked a whole bunch.

To the point where I have no idea what we're going to talk about in this episode. Yes. We have spent so much time ruining other people's shows that I don't know what we're going to do on our own show. It's true. We were on Drop Frames today, and Geekenders on Friday, although you're always on Geekenders. That's true. I streamed all day yesterday.

I'm, uh, yeah. And then I've been streaming all day today, with the Drop Frames and all this. Oh yeah. Well, is that streaming, or you just mean like recording? Well, I mean, it was on our streams. We were, it was being streamed to our channels. That's true. I guess that's right. I didn't even realize until afterwards and I was like oh yeah let's stream it on my channel. Yeah we do, we did three hours of that which you tried talking for three hours and being entertaining.

It's not, it's not easy. It's true., but but that chat did say funniest episode in a while, so that's a win for us That's true. Yeah, no we we bet I saw that it was like Yeah, baby. We definitely are in that title. They're just like finally this show is funny again. Oh yeah We got it. Hell. Yeah They are for geek enders. I gotta wake up at like 10am, which I'm not accustomed to, right? So, as somebody who goes to bed at like 4.30, 5am, right? So, I was like, alright, got my like 5 hours of sleep or something, 4.5 hours. I was like, you know what, it's for friendship. Here we go. Sure, sure.

Yesterday, I slept like eight and a half hours and I woke up at my normal like 1 p.m. I was like, okay, because I fell asleep earlier. Then today I was like, all right, well at least this won't be 10 a.m. This will be like 11.30 noon for me at least. But then I couldn't fall asleep and it was the classic knowing you have to wake up and at first I'm like all right you know I'm just and I think

it's because I did the thing where I overslept a bit because I didn't sleep much the day before so I was like all right sure and then I was just laying and then you're laying and then I then it starts being like all right now it's's 5.30, now it's 6 a.m. Okay, well now I can get, now I can get like five and a half, six hours, okay, that's okay, nope, now it's like 6.30, now it's like 7. I mean, I've been there but at reasonable times. Right. Like you being like, it's 6.30, I'm like, oh, I can get five hours of sleep.

I guess that, I mean, I guess if you do midnight for me, then yeah that checks out Yeah, so I think toaster woman woke up at like 7 a.m. And then she was late 7 a.m. And then I think I fell asleep right before right after that so I think I fell asleep like 730 7 730 so I got four four and a half hours of sleep which man Today that's what you're running on yeah so I'm just

I'm I'm ready to just go back to my normal routine is what I'm ready for which you mean going to bed at 2 a.m. waking up bet at 1 p.m. no going to bed at 430 a.m. waking up oh my bad what a fool yeah right I mean like how dare I be reasonable. You think you sleep in like 10 hours? Although admittedly last night you were streaming and I watched a little bit of it I was like when's he gonna go to bed because he does have to be up early. Yeah well the thing is like if I go to bed too early I can't fall asleep. I get it I was just a little like when's this boy going to bed because you're two hours ahead of me And I was watching you at 11 30 p.m

Yeah, no, it's uh I mean, I wasn't too bad cuz like 2 a.m. Then we get ready We're like chill out get ready for bed everything then go to bed, and it was just like It's just I didn't as soon as I wasn't falling asleep after like 30 minutes. I was like oh boy Here we go. Which me thinking that probably didn't help anything. You got to get on my, see, I keep finding new ways to fall asleep instantly. It's great.

I found a YouTube channel that has every single episode, full seasons of Hell's Kitchen. And I realized I didn't know there were 21 seasons. I have only watched maybe four. So I am now going back through the list of seasons. And what I'll do is I'll put on the playlist and just let that thing ride, and I'll turn down the volume really low, and I'll just go to bed.

And so far, I made it all the way through season 21. And now I'm gonna start season 20 and work my way backwards. It's great I'll maybe listen like I listen like 15 minutes of an episode before I just pass out and honestly something about it think about Gordon being like you don't case It's call. It's role. It's wrong. I'm like Gets me well. I mean that'll be me tonight like Like once I'm already tired and then I start watching something I'm like Like trying to stay awake. It's just the I think it is one of those things. That's why they tell you not to take naps If you haven't slept well, or not like insane naps

So you take like a 10 20 minute nap But people are like I took a two hour nap because then the next night you can't fall asleep and so it's like if you oversleep then you have the same issue where your body's like oh well we got enough sleep we don't have to go to bed yet and you're like but it's bedtime and it's like no I'm good stupid body stupid body stupid body don't even want to work right so yeah it's uh it's like most days if it's like 6 a.m. 6 a. 6am and I can't fall asleep I'm like hey you know what I'll just sleep till like 1 30 still get like seven hours I'm good but it's just knowing like I gotta get up for something in this amount of time and your brain's just like now it's this

amount of then it's like counting it down I think that's what really makes it bad. You also didn't do any like prep. What? Like you didn't take the few days beforehand to reacclimate to a different schedule. You just jumped you raw dog to that dude. That was that was out of control. I mean that's what I always do. I'm aware it's crazy. The thing is like what's good for one day it's like whatever because I'm just gonna fall back to my normal schedule. Every time I've ever tried to change my schedule it just falls back to like Four to five a.m.. Bedtime like throughout the toast like that is that something that toast is really yeah

She's fine with that late-night stuff. Yeah in fact. She usually goes to bed like 530 Interesting she like browses the internet a bit plays her games and stuff and then it'll like get in the bed and then uh cat runs around he chomps on food it's you know we got we got our routine usually after I'm done streaming we'll like watch a show or something like wind down too so it's it just a little wind down love that yeah and it's funny all right this is the best part cuz even when I knew I had to wake up for the geek enders I fell asleep fine so I think I was fine there but okay I didn't have my pre-sleep banana oh wow I mean god yeah you can't go to bed

without that yeah no I always have a pre-sleep banana which they always are like don't eat before you go to bed but like I gotta eat like something like but usually like a healthy banana what is the what is the point of the been pre-sleep banana well let me tell you all right so please do me type in sleep banana but you know but you're gonna Google it I'll take it a banana is a food that can help you sleep because it contains nutrients and they promote relaxation and sleep regulation Nutrients in bananas are tryptophan potassium magnesium pectin Eating bananas before bed can help you fall asleep faster and sleep longer. They decrease anxiety

They help with insomnia. They can help you feel full longer So yeah Cuz the thing is like you don't want to eat a full meal before bed Cuz you're gonna get a heartburn or like blood and like your blood sugar and all that but you want like I always need a Little snack like you know, I have like a banana a little peanut butter. Maybe some almond milk And that's all I that's usually what I do and like every other time like every other night I fall asleep in like five minutes, like five, ten minutes. But then it's always when I have to do something or wake up or, you know, some sort of stress or something.

Yeah. All right. Yeah. Because my mind spirals. That's usually the problem. It's not like I sit there and I'm like, well, tomorrow is going to be a rough one. But I guess I'll just wait. My mind's just like four hours sleep gonna feel terrible Everything's ruined and then my heart like I'll feel my heart rate my heart's beaten like a hundred beats per minute I get I spiral why not just go to bed earlier

Because I'm not gonna fall asleep earlier. I've got my routine if you know you're only gonna get four hours Then why not try to get more? Because I know if I go to sleep earlier I'm just gonna lay there anyway yeah I'm gonna fall asleep earlier okay it's a heavy drinking that's gotta solve the problem you know I think you're on to something yeah just start

to like take a bottle and just go until you pass out and you will be fine you'll wake up hungover but you will have gotten eight hours of sleep. Yeah, you know. I'm pretty sure that's science. I think I heard a doctor say that once. Broken REM sleep in there, you know, lack of quality. But it's got to work. It's fine. I mean, it's usually just one day. So it just so happens that now it's like one day and then I got some sleep and then I got another day. So's two days of bad sleep in a week granted. There's plenty of people. They're like raising kids They're like working three jobs and they get much worse sleep than I do of me being like two days So they're probably like crendor is crying about two bad days of sleep. I've been getting bad sleep for 55 years

I feel like if bad sleep for 55 years, that's you should have seen a doctor. Although seeing a doctor probably costs money and I guess sleep is important. I would have been like, fine, I'll pay the money, whatever you want. It just fixed me, doc. That's what I'm saying. I just, I, I love sleeping. I love getting my seven to eight hours of sleep, feeling good, feeling refreshed, ready to take on

the day like when I get under five hours especially a few times in a week I'm just like I hate this and then oh that's I was gonna say because I was literally thinking the other day I was like man I've been falling asleep pretty fast I haven't had my insomnia issue in a while And then boom that is it that was my mistake thinking about it That mean well you bring this on yourself frequently. This is something you do often you bring your own traumas to you Yes, but it always happens in stressful situations So I think I brought it up like a month or two ago And it was like when holiday stuff was happening

and I had to get up early for holiday. It's always like some stressful things happening and I gotta get up early. Cause otherwise I'm fine. Yeah. So, how's your life? Dude, I, this is a stressor for me, but only cause I'm a psychopath.

I, maybe one or two days ago was in my bathroom and I was, like, getting ready to start the day and out of the corner of my eye I saw something move and it was, like, a bug. It was, you know, like, just a bug. I don't know if it was, like, one of those water bugs or a roach or what. It was, like, a little tiny bug, but I stepped on that son of a bitch real quick and then I cleaned it

up but ever since then my mind is like how that bug get in what where that bug come from how do I stop that from happening again are there more bugs I just don't know about how do I get rid of the bug that's where I'm at mentally I hate I hate little critters not a fan fan. And so, you know, be it spider or whatever, I'm like, get out of my home. I don't want you here. I don't like you here. You gotta go.

And so, yeah, I've been almost psychotically thinking, well, I don't want to put anything on the ground because then a bug could hide in there. But also I don't, like, should I clean up my floor? Or, so I did like a once over the apartment and I saw nothing. I was like, well, how'd that guy get should I clean up my floor or? So I did like a once over the apartment and I saw nothing. I was like, wow, that guy get it. Was it through the sink?

Oh, maybe the bathtub. That's where I'm at mentally. I genuinely had a minor breakdown of like, how do I stop this? If he has friends, maybe the friends will come here. Like, I don't want to deal with that. Dude, I sometimes worry about me. Of all the things, like I'm very well aware that I wasn't always like this. Dude, I sometimes worry about me.

Of all the things, like I'm very well aware that I wasn't always like this. And more importantly, there's times where I just don't even care. Like if I'm at someone else's house, I wouldn't even care. If you're like, oh yeah, they got a bug. All right, well whatever, not my home. Or if I'm traveling abroad or if I'm in a place where I just know there's going to be like gnats and all sorts of, it doesn't affect me. But for some reason in my own home, I'm in a place where I just know there's gonna be like gnats and all sorts of doesn't affect me but for some reason in my own home like how dare they this is my kingdom and I yeah I don't know I don't know what it

is I get really weird about it huh well I mean some are good like spiders kill the other bugs sure sure sure I just don't want them there I don't want to know the spiders there what if that spider lays eggs then I got a billion spiders I don't want that I mean that's true that's what I'm saying I'm like mmm I don't want that so seeing one guy whatever he was now I'm worried that there's gonna be more of them and honestly the reason why I do know what it is. Oh, man, I do know what it is. I definitely had so years ago, maybe 2017. I don't remember. We definitely talked about the podcast back then. Do you remember there was a time I was overseas and when I came

home, I went to my room to go to bed because I was like tired from the flight. I put my head down and I don't know when I woke up up but I woke up and I felt like weird. Apparently there were just ants in my bedroom and I guess due to construction down the street whatever ant colony was there had moved down the street towards our building and was climbing up the side of the wall was getting into all the apartments and so right where my carpet met the wall, met the window on the outside, facing towards the outside of the unit, ants were coming in and I just didn't know. And I guess they had,

because I was gone for two weeks because I was overseas, when I came back, I guess they just like made their home there. And so they were like just walking in a line over me on my bed. And it freaked me out. Like they were like so close to my face.

I like couldn't handle it. And then I saw there was not just one or two, but literally like a marching troop of ants along one wall. And I was like, what the hell? And you know me already, I'm like a clean freak. So I was spazzing. And I was like, someone's gotta fix this. And they're like, well, sir, the best we can do

is every Monday we have someone come out who goes through the apartments So it have to be Monday. It was a Wednesday So I had to wait almost a full week for them to come so every night I like cleaned my bedroom would go to sleep and then by morning there'd be a whole new like army of ants, dude it Genuinely scarred me I think Now I freak out whenever I see anything because that's not something that happens to me often as you know I keep a

clean ship and so I was like mmm no I don't like it yeah that's what it was huh well I mean at least you don't have ants crawling on you now. I mean look, trust me, I'm worried about it. I don't even know what that bug was and now I'm worried about that potential bug species existing within my home. Listen, I mean it makes sense. Ants gave me a concussion. See?

They were gunning for you though. They took you out. They completely ignored me. I was nothing to them Yeah, they walked over me. They were like we got stuff to do the thing is I don't know what they were looking for there What there's nothing to find but yeah, they were not they weren't they were not cool at least you At least you got your sleep still even while they were crawling on you. I did not it was like the longest week of my entire life I barely slept. I slept on my couch half the time I was like afraid to go in my bedroom because I was like they're gonna be all over me

They're gonna get my ears and stuff dude. I was not okay And now that's right the thing is I saw him in the bathroom So now when I go in my bathroom, I'd give it like the once-over like is anyone in here You in here watching me doing I got I I got I got issues I got big issues you know what I wrote down in my phone that I wanted to talk about yes yes I was mentioning somewhere about reviews and then I thought to myself, why can't we review reviews? Like just go watch some like someone's review or go read someone's review and then review the review?

Yes, like for example, I was reading somebody reviewed some product, I can't remember what it was and they were just like, it doesn't even say on here what temperature to take, I don't know, it was a meat thermometer, we were ordering something and then they were like, they don't even say where the temperature is, and I literally looked at it for like five seconds and saw, in the picture that they took, exactly what they were looking for and I was like, I wish I could just, and then, cause they gave it a one star and I was just like, um, can I review this review to say this one star review is a literal one star? Like I would review that review, a one star review.

Can you market is not helpful. I guess you can do that. But it's not, I understand. It's not as good as being like, you are terrible. One star to your one star review. Yeah. It's much more fun if you're able to like, review the review instead of just being like, is this helpful? Because then people will be like, uh, I don't think so. And then most people aren't even going to click helpful. They're just going to be like, alright, whatever, and read it. But like, if you read a terrible review, I want to be able to be like, all right, whatever and read it. But like if you read a terrible review I want to be able to be like hey this reviewer sucks. I

Guess cuz most reviews are subjective. You know what I mean? Yeah Like in this case the one you're talking about clearly that person was not paying attention, but most reviews are Kind of the vibe of the person and what they gel with rather than the quality of something. So yeah, I don't know. I mean, I guess you could. You could still be like you are wrong, but then that's just Twitter. Yeah. I mean, it's really what you're asking is you just want to be on Twitter. Really? I definitely don't want that. Oh, there oh there you go yeah because what you want to do is respond to people without them responding to you

I mean they can reply to my review if they want no I mean like everyone yeah well I mean yeah I mean there's gonna be like review bombs and stuff I guess that's part of the problem you could review the review you review bomb the review and And then, you know, the more I think about it, maybe not. Yeah. Although sometimes stuff like that's helpful. I want to say shout out to everyone who on that Cox and Craner episode,

where I told you about those lizard men in Warhammer and was way off. That's not at all what they are. Um, yeah, they all, everyone let me know, which is I'm fine with that. I appreciate that. And what it did is it caused me to go into total war Warhammer three and like figure out what the hell I was talking about, dude, I don't think any of them are what I was talking about. I don't know what I was talking about. I must've, I think this past week, maybe past two weeks,

I played that game so much trying to figure out exactly what the hell I was referring to I mean location wise and race wise I was correct but mechanically nothing plays the way I just I don't know if I made it up I don't know what happened but to everyone who told me I was wrong you are are correct. I was very wrong. So spot on reviews of that episode kids. See, I said he was wrong and I was right. I mean they were. I'm not going to even fight him on it. It's accurate. Although what it did do is it started me playing a chaos campaign and last night I just beat it and got an achievement and I was like, I'm so proud. I beat whatever that thing is the immortal

One that takes 50 hours. I finally beat it and was very pleased. Oh Yeah, the immortal one. I forgot where you have to like destroy the entire map did it loved it big fan It was like you've destroyed the world as chaos. I was like hell. Yeah, I did So now I don't don't play that game for another five years but I know this is a good time yeah I mean I'd play when new DLC and stuff comes out at least yeah I never you know they always want

you to buy it I never do so it depends I think it also depends if you like the faction that comes out to like they released like a what do you call it? Another skaven guy or another Lizard man or another you know any of my favorite factions. I don't they need more norse honestly I don't I really like the Norse they released a zinch guy who is a like in shape shift. Oh yeah.

And he doesn't control cities he establishes cults in them. The problem is I don't understand how to play him at all because what happens is when you establish a cult he then can't move for a certain number of turns and I don't understand why. Even though the game is like your character hasn't moved you haven't moved moved your character. I'm like, I literally can't. It won't let me. And it's like, it didn't move. You haven't moved. I'm like, is there something I'm doing wrong here? I do it. I just gave up. I was like, I hate this character. I don't know what's the concept. Very cool. Execution wise. I was like, I don't understand why I, it takes five turns for me to do anything like nah, nah, I'm out. I

Clearly was playing it wrong. But honestly if you can't tell it me how to do it right away, then I don't give a damn That's a it's a changeling. Isn't it? Yeah, he's like a like a multi-armed dude without a face And he can become anyone else in the game during battles, right? Yeah, and my thought was oh, maybe I have to become one of them in order to move around. But no, he just stands there. And then after a certain amount of time, you're allowed to move again. And then if you take another city

and establish another cult, he's stuck there. And I'm like, is it, I don't see anything in the game that says that's what happens. Like when you click his character, there's nothing that says this is how it plays like that. And I was like, I don't understand this. It's like when I'm trying to learn the, whatever those undead pirates were at first, I was like, I don't know. It took me a while to figure it out. But at first I was like, this is stupid. I don't know what this is. This is dumb. I'm sure it'll be like that, but I don't have the patience for it.

I got other games to play. I was like, yeah, screw it. I don't have the patience for it. I got other games to play. I'm like, yeah screw it. I don't care So yeah, I reviewing reviews Not a good idea not a good idea Let's see I'm trying to think There's anything else. I feel like there was something I was gonna bring up What we talked about last week we talked about Garfield Wait, he was on GeekEnders something. One of the... everything just blends together right now. Oh, I remember the Jesse Jr. commented on the the podcast. I did not see this. Hold on, let me go look. Yeah, if you go to the... Supposedly Jesse Jr.

Supposedly Jesse Jr. Yeah, it's on the geek end. There's episode 60 featuring me Alright, and then you got the top comments. You got me saying it's your quarterly crendor You got this dude saying this crendor guy seems cool. I hope he comes back and Then you guys this is Jesse jr. Yeah pin up. All right interesting. Yeah from the video I'm kind of a lurker and not anything but I I did it in hopes. He would just leave, but he didn't go Sorry about the messages no way man. Thank you. That's great. Yeah, so I mean that might not firm This is actually Jesse jr. So Yeah, I guess

Mean yeah, I feel like it seems like it's him the way he wrote that. Yeah. Look, I'm absolutely here for it. That guy, my hero, just completely nailed the bit. The fact that I talked about that and then another person did it. I honestly, more people should. Yeah. Honestly, I would, I'm gonna start doing that if I ever get, you know,

take the socked again. It's be like you start shouting your stuff out. Yeah. If it's, if they're trying to, they're using you for their social media and use them. Yeah. Free, uh, free publicity. Yeah. Jimmy, come on. Now they're going to put you, and and they're gonna put you in front of all those kids who are watching them like be awkward Be awkward with them. Like I I remember I was on oh man. It was one of these like um you know like Streamer interview kind of shows but it's clearly a comedy one played for goofs and the girl who was hosting it was trying to like you know be like I'm gonna make it awkward on purpose in the entire time I just was

being very forthwith and like honest I was like you know sometimes in this job it's really tough and getting in the industry is difficult and she's like trying to do goofs I was like you know one day I'll be dead and honestly I'm just happy to be able to do this. Just really not playing the game. I'm sure there's clips of it out there somewhere, but it's so funny. She's just trying her hardest to make sexual jokes and stuff. And I was like, look, you got to do what you got to do

in order to survive in this business. I don't hate anyone. Like, man, if you want to get big old titties and show them off, awesome. I would if I could. Let me tell you, I'm just being really honest and like blatant and she's trying her hardest to like salvage it. But I was like, look, if you want to play goofy, I can play goofy. I'm fine with that. I can do that. Not even stressed. I will out goof your goof with complete sincerity.

When he said playing goofy, I just thought of you as goofy like the old Gorsh time is oppressive Mick we're all gonna die oh boy not me I'll live forever in Kingdom Hearts I've never actually played Kingdom Hearts I've just seen Kingdom Hearts I think you would have the most fun with it because it is insane. It is genuine. So Kingdom Hearts 1 is pure insanity. It makes no sense. Kingdom Hearts 2, somehow more insane because they expect you to play other games that you

definitely won't have played. And then Kingdom Hearts 3 is off the deep end. They introduce characters that I think were introduced in like a mobile game, I don't even know. They're like, this is Aqua. And the crazy part is there are people who love those characters, I've never heard of them before in my life.

So I'm sitting there trying to play this game, and they're like, everyone must watch out for Xehanort. I'm like, Xehanort? That's a shit name, like that's the villain? Like, nah, this sucks. And everyone's like, oh. Dude, the fact that there's a shit name, like that's the villain? Like nah, this sucks. And everyone's like, oh. Dude, the fact that there's a phrase. That sounds like a villain in a weird fantasy book.

I mean, roughly, yeah. The fact that there's a phrase where people are like, oh, he got Norded, dude. Norded? I'm telling you. Norded? I just, honestly, I would love to watch you play the first Kingdom Hearts. It is charming because there's some Disney elements and Goofy and Donald are in it, but also just has random Final Fantasy stuff for no reason, which by the way, they just slowly

phase out over time. By the time you get to the third game, there's no Final Fantasy at all. It is all Disney properties and all the, what sucks is at first in the first couple games You would you would experience the story you'd go into say like um Like agrabah or whatever and you do something that felt like you were in that disney property By the time it's the third game. You're literally playing through movies like the frozen level of kingdom hearts 3 Was just the movie and it was so boring, dude. I just I was like wait so I'm just doing beat by beat the movie this is trash I did not like Kingdom Hearts 3 at all I think I got me like four hours in it was like nah dude

this is for me so I have no idea how that story ends and honestly I just don't care yeah, it's uh Every time I've watched it. I'm like this seems kind of fun, but also I have no idea what's happening Oh gameplay wise they're great. They're super fun to play gameplay wise I will not deny them that even three has some really cool mechanics however You know me I'm there for story and if your story is nonsense, and then I'm out. I'm out Yeah me I'm there for story and if your story is nonsense, nah I'm out. I'm out. Yeah. Uh, interesting. How many Kingdom Hearts are there? Uh, there's one, two, three, the main, the mainline ones, but then there's also Dream

Drop Distance, Death by Sleep, 360 something over two or whatever. Like just, like Birth by Sleep maybe, I don't even know what they're called. There's so many different ones and they all connect, which is fine if you're into that. But if you, I imagine you have to play all of them and buy into all of them. And because I didn't really have any mobile consoles, I only ever played one, two, and then three. They released like a 1.5 and a 2.5,

I think that has all the extra stuff. In fact, one of the things they added is literally just the cinematics from one game just so you could watch them to catch up. And like... Nah. Nah. There's... There's 13 games. Oh my god. That's honestly the worry for me when it comes to Final Fantasy VII Rebirth. So I know you didn't play that.

But in that, so Final Fantasy seven remake was a game that is based off Final Fantasy seven, the first disc, right? Like the first major area, except in remake, they added some like cool, weird, something else is going on here. Like what the hell's happening in this game in rebirth, the sequel, they continue the story of Final Fantasy seven. But again, they have this like, what the hell's happening? This is so weird. So crazy. However, they do add in, uh, this like the sort of DLC for, for remake intergrade, they add some stuff that is from the game

Final Fantasy Crisis Core. That is a game that I think originally was for PSP, I think, back in the day. And I definitely never played it. So I went on my way to play it. Guys, I don't like that game at all. Sorry, those of you who do, it is like, there is a scene that sums it up perfectly where Zack, the main character, gets his head grabbed by these monster guys. And his line of dialogue is, my hair, they're eating my hair, which is a whole thing. So that sums up that game.

And so that somehow is relevant. Then as I'm playing Rebirth, they include plot lines from a mobile game that I have never heard of and apparently only came out in Japan, question mark? And that's in the game. And I'm like, what the hell? So I get it if you're invested in all of it. apparently only came out in Japan? And that's in the game. And I'm like, what the hell? So I get it if you're invested in all of it. But if you're like invested in a way that

is reasonable, but not deep diving, a lot of it worries me when that happens in games. So it's like, you got to know everything, dude. And there's fifth. It's like when Warcraft says, well, you have to have read the book to understand what's going on. That's stupid as hell. I hate that. That is stupid. Yeah. I always hated that. They're like, here's a thing where the story's all in the game, but you have to go consume this other piece of media in order to understand it in the game. Like what just put it in the game. Exactly.

Just sum it up in the game. And to its credit, Final Fantasy 7 Rebirth does do that. It does give you context to what's going on. But Kingdom Hearts 100% does not. It just expects you to know who these characters are. And you're like, what? So yeah, not a fan of that stuff. Yeah. I even found a Reddit thread where some guys like,

here's the order in which you play these games. I'm like, oh my God my god yeah there's a lot it's just too much man it's just too much yeah I'll probably just watch some like speedrunner that'll kind of satiate my interest in the game dude last night I was watching speedrunning I was watching uh oh man, some dude at MagFest was playing DuckTales, the remake of DuckTales. And it was super fun to watch him. I think he was trying to do it in an hour and he did it in 38 minutes. And it was great.

It was very funny though because he seemed like a pretty young dude and he was trying his hardest to explain what was going on but he does something that one of Years ago one of my students did this all the time and it's very similar to how sometimes I'll say like or uh or But I'll yeah, I'll do like little Words in between things this guy's in between word was basically I used to have a student who did this all the time. And he'd be like, oh, so you basically have to go here and basically you do this, basically, like that.

And after a while you pick up on it, you're like, wow, this guy says basically a lot. But I had a student who used to do that, and for some reason it was really charming. I was like, this guy reminds me of that kid I used to teach and it's very cute and I'm glad he's doing this. So I watched his entire playthrough and it was, like I like I said maybe 40 minutes tops dude crushed it was great It was fascinating to watch him just destroy it. Although I didn't realize that um

The remake had this it has a weird vibe where The enemies are cartoon looking but the world is 3d-ish I don't like that at all. I don't for some reason I didn't realize that's what the remake was. I don't like that. I don't like that. Oh, I think I know what you're talking about. Well, it just looks weird. Like, the characters, all the characters look like animated characters from a TV show, but the world looks like kinda 3D

graphics and it just doesn't ring, it feels weird to me. but the world looks like kinda 3D graphics and it just doesn't ring... it feels weird to me yeah, no, I get that. I've seen a few games that try to do that and they're just... yeah, it's like stick with one thing like, animate the entire world or make everything 3D the combination just seems weird yeah

especially in a platformer, I don't know yeah, no, I see I can see how maybe creating it, they're like oh, this is a cool contrast of like new and old. But then, yeah, I feel like it loses its, you know, appeal after a few minutes. Yeah, it doesn't, it doesn't have like an aesthetic. It's combining two things into something that shouldn't exist. Yeah. But it was fun to watch and he was good at it. all good. Honestly a lot of speedrun stuff happening. After that was over while I was watching you there was

another speedrun going on on Games Done Quick that was also Pokemon I think. Not sure which one it was but they were doing something. I love a good speedrun. It's a good watch every time. Yeah I was was watching games done quick the other week when it was all live. I think it's all reruns now, but I always love tuning in at like late at night and they're like, we're gonna be playing these random ass games.

Dude, that's the awful block. When they play terrible games late at night, that's the best. Oh, what was the, I watched, I was watching them play, was it Shenmue? Yeah, I was watching them play that. That was pretty fun. And then right after that they're playing just like Jimbo's Adventure to Gooberland and you're just like, what? And they're just like,

yeah this game's got audio bugs, you can't move very fast, and you're just kind of a blob, but it's really cool. I'm like, oh okay. Like, so this year for the one they did earlier this month, the awful block games were Superman 64 golf with your grandmother, Rex Ronin, experimental surgeon, Oscar. Don't know what that is. Inspector gadget. I watched that one. It's 18 minutes long and it's ridiculous. It only plays one cut scene over and over and over again and it's terrible.

Bad Way, don't know what that game is. Doronko Wonko, that is something. That's a nine minute game, don't know what that is. Who Shot Johnny Rock is a game that they did. Miga Mermem, don't know what that is. Squirrel with a that big rigs over the road racing Kevin Costner's water world and bite night those the ones they did the funniest part is because the awesome block is just terrible games most of these videos are sub 20 minutes just people just crushing these terrible games and I love that that's so funny yeah they're all really fast a lot of them are just like old Super Nintendo games too or just like the old console games so they're just the there's one is just like complete ripoffs of other games too one

was like a bubsy ripoff which is already weird bubsy's already a weird game oh my god dude I'm looking at the Ronco Ronco This is a game that apparently you play as a little tiny dog in a home and you're dirty and your objective As far as I can tell is to dirty up everything Your owner has left and your job is to destroy their home that is so funny That actually is pretty funny. I like that concept. Yeah, this guy does. He beats the game in nine minutes. That's incredible. Man, I love a good speed run. What can I say? Yeah. Um, you know what else I love? It's a new year. Hopefully a new you. It's almost February. So hopefully you've thought about your fitness goals for 2025 and why not take it to the next level with Factor. Factor is chef made, ready to eat meals in 2 minutes. They're super fast and they

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gouda and bacon shredded chicken hash with roasted green beans. Oh it's one of my favorites and the best part is all three of those come from completely different dietary preferences. One is protein plus, one is calorie smart, and you can mix and match. You don't have to just stick with one style. You can do whatever makes you happy. Honestly you have 40 meals to choose from. So get started right now yourself over at factor meals dot com slash cox cox 50 Oh FF that's cox 50 off and use code cox 50 off to get 50% off your first box plus free shipping That's code cox 50. Oh FF at factor meals dot com slash cox 50 off F to get 50% off plus free shipping on your first box all right

oh boy traffic out here is a little wacky a little crazy it's getting a little backed up and there's cars I actually tried to take my car to get a car wash because I remember we talked about getting it waxed for the winter and I was like dude I'll get some of that wax on the car. It's been snowing get that get that salt off, you know, and There they're like systems were down or some shit. So I was like, alright, so I didn't get that done I'll probably have to do that tomorrow and I did go get a sandwich but it got stolen So they had to make it again. Thank you Where'd you get a sandwich, but it got stolen so they had to make it again. Thank you Where'd you get a sandwich from?

So we got a place here called pot belly. All right, okay Yeah, I don't know how many there are all over but there's none here But when I lived in Ohio in Columbus there was a pot belly and I would go there and get like they had like a really Good mustard that they put on sandwiches, but it's been 20 years so yeah no they're really good sandwiches I love them and so I was like all right I'm gonna order from there and I got there and then I saw some guy like walking out of there with a sandwich he like picked it up off the thing and he's just like scooting along and he didn't even walk to a car he just kept walking I was like okay and then I went and looked and I think he took my saying which they they honestly

don't check the other day I was in a Chipotle and they had a whole bunch of bags of food and people just walking up a taken I was like how do they know theirs yeah no I guarantee there's plenty of times they probably get stolen so I was like hey I have a order and then the guys like wait. I just put your order out there. It's not there And I was like yeah, it's not there, and he looks he's like oh my somebody stole it Are you kidding me man, and this is by the way this man had a soul patch He was like probably 60 and was wearing like one of the like puka shell necklaces or whatever they're called Have I ever told you that I have a genuine dream of

you know, maybe being that old and Having enough money in life that I can do like a two to three day work shift at a restaurant Like you know like a place like that and just make Sandwiches and be like oh man, that's a but I don't need it But I just like do it cuz I like interact with people or whatever you know what I mean like it's It's a weird thing to think about but I like the idea of just being I do this for fun I think about that like college classes to like what if I just got old and like took college classes for fun You can audit stuff. I think that's what

a lot of people end up doing like older people just go take classes or they will like volunteer get like a part-time job just to do that. Yeah I like I like there's something there's something sincere and sweet about it. Obviously I'd rather spend most of my time on a beach earning 20% but I feel like after a while I get bored of it. Yeah like sometimes you just want to interact with people do whatever and you don't have to. Yeah and I don't want to become the old guy who fights with people just for the daily interaction. Yeah. Like I don't want that. Yeah it's it's like the old lady to be the Walmart volunteer right? Yeah exactly exactly's like the old lady that'd be the Walmart volunteer, right?

Yeah, exactly, exactly, just like that. You get out, you get to be in your community a little bit. There's something about it. Obviously, the best version of this is mentally I'm thinking 80, but let's be real, it'll probably be 60 something. Yep. So yeah, that guy was just like, you're saying he's like I'm sorry like we'll remake it like I can't believe they just stole that shit and then he's

like you want like a soda or something a free soda free cookie and I was like now just let's wait for the same which he's like all right and I would have taken that soda you kidding me yeah I will take it home me? I would have been like, yeah, we'll take it home. Uh, I guess I could have, but I was just, it's like, You're healthy is what you are. You are smart. Yeah. I just, I didn't care. I just wanted my sandwich. I had to come record this. So I was just like, I'll just, those wait. So yeah, I think that, uh, that random person scoot along in their pajama pants took my sandwich.

I've like I said, I've questioned that multiple times when I go into various restaurants and they have stuff waiting for people, but there isn't anyone there. They just put it on a thing and expect people to get it. I'm like, how do they know that's the person? Yeah. So they don't. And I noticed that a lot of places have up like keeping it behind the counter now.

Right. Yeah. That makes sense. That's the traffic. All right. Let's go to weather. We do have it. We do have something this week because JP gave us something this morning. Oh yeah, that's right. He wanted us to go to Christmas Island, I believe. Is there like- I don't even know what that is. Is there anything at Christmas Island?

Is that a goof? I don't know. Christmas Island is northwest of Australia, really close to Jakarta, kind of. Interesting it's called Christmas Island, and most of it's a national park. Oh yeah, they got Ida Kitchen. They got, yeah, they actually do got a piece of it. On one side there's the Swell Lodge,

but that seems to be in the middle of nowhere. Is there actually a town here? Oh, there is, oh, there is. Oh, we have to do the weather for this. The man gave us the thing. All right, well, we'll do Christmas Island. I didn't know if it was like a goof or if it actually had stuff.

Okay. I mean, it's real. Yeah. Although, wait, I just typed in Christmas Island and went to Nova Scotia, Canada. Are there multiple Christmas Islands? Well, we'll, I mean, we gotta do the Australia one, cause that's the one we're looking at. Christmas Island Canada? Tough. We'll get you next time.

Christmas Island. Here we go. Okay. I think this is the actual Christmas Island, cause I don't think it's 84 in Canada. Okay, here we are. Currently it's 82. Partly cloudy, feels like 90. You got a high of 84, 77 is the low, 81% humidity, 29.78 inches of pressure, 8 mile visibility, 5.52am sunrise, 6.27pm sunset, winds at 6 miles an hour, dew point 76, UV index 3 of 11 and a waning crescent moon phase 10 day 84 partly cloudy winds at 510 miles an hour Tuesday you got a.m. showers at 84 Wednesday 83 thunderstorms Thursday 83 thunderstorms Friday 82

thunderstorms Saturday 82 thunderstorms Sunday 83 thunderstorms and that's pretty much the weather is 83 ish with thunderstorms every Saturday 82 thunderstorms, Sunday 83 thunderstorms, and that's pretty much the weather is 83-ish with thunderstorms every day. I mean that sounds accurate for the area. Yeah. I'm pretty impressed. They keep showing these various apartments and things and they look very nice considering this is kind of in the middle of nowhere.

Like the one I was just looking at seems very modern. I was like, oh, okay. But most of the restaurants have the vibe of you are on an island, everything is open. It's, although the food looks good, just, it all has that vibe of like, yeah, I want to sit on a beach eating this. I just clicked on a thing that was like Christmas Island, a unique gem in Kurabati.

And it took me to TikTok and it's just come with me to spend Christmas on Christmas Island. And it's Chloe Jade Travels. And she's just like whispering. And she's like, the island is actually only five main cities with names like London, Paris, Poland, and Banana. And then she's like showing Christmas Island. I feel like that might be the Canadian version. Christmas Island here has one city. East of Fiji? Is this east of Fiji?

I mean, no. This is Christmas Island northwest of Australia. So this technically would be west of Fiji. Wait, so are there... Is there another Christmas Island? There's too many Christmas Islands. There it's too many Christmas islands there's way too many Christmas islands if this is the case yeah we got to get on the same page world there can only be one Christmas Island they all have to fight it to the death hold on yeah one island stays the the rest we sink oh I

guess there's a place called cure ofati, which is known as Christmas Island. Doesn't, that doesn't, nah, this one over here is Christmas Island though. Yeah, no, I think this one truly is the Christmas Island. If anything, we've learned that we gotta fight over this. You can only have one of one thing. Honestly, I think that goes for everything. we gotta we gotta fight over this you can only have one of one thing honestly I think that goes for everything when they talk about like oh yeah this is Dallas I don't know India well no they're gonna be one they're gonna have

to fight we need Dallas Texas you can't do that yeah I agree there has to be one of everything otherwise gets too confusing yep we got it we got it everyone's got to change it and the you send your best fighter Yeah, and whoever wins you get to keep it and the other one has to change it Including names everyone has to get a unique name No, you know what honestly with that too There can't be like 85 like Jesse Cox's yeah, there's only one and if I lose that's fine I'll

change my name to like jank corksman it's it's whatever I don't care but I'll go down fighting damn it youtube.com slash jank corksman good old jank never lets me good old jank everyone loves jankank Corksman, that guy's awesome. That guy is awesome. Yeah, so you know, I'm just saying. I did find the Poon-San coffee shop on Christmas Island. Now are you on the right island? Yeah I'm on, dude I'm on Christmas Island. Okay good, good, good.

Yeah, Poon-San. Right next to Meng Chong Trading. Now, here's the thing, is Meng Chong Trading... what is that? It looks like some sort of trading establishment where they have many boxes of goods. Uh-huh. And that's all I'm gathering. Also, half of this town is just a golf course. Oh yeah, I see that. Look at that, yeah. They also have a high school. I mean, I guess, yeah, it's fascinating. I wonder how many people actually, you know what, to the wiki,

how many people actually live here. Oh,, what's weird about this is it says that ethnically in 2021 there were 22% of the island was Chinese, 17 was Australian, 16 was Malaysian, 12 was English, and four-ish percent was Indonesian. And I was about to make the statement, all these photos have a bunch of white dudes in it and the alright yeah checks out Australians and English make up a third of the population huh it's that does check out population is a 2021 less than 2,000 people mmm that sounds about right yeah wow that's I mean it is a small island it is a small island yeah the majority of the island 63% is the park and it looks like another 10% is the golf course yeah fascinating yeah look at that that That's the weather. Oh, alright, let's go to sports.

Sports. Sports, we've currently got the Super Bowl matchups getting set. We had the Eagles beat the Commanders 55 to 23. And as of right now, the Chiefs are up 21 to 16 at halftime. So we'll see how that ends, but it'll probably be Chief be Chief's Eagles and then we'll have to watch that so cool. I mean we don't have to watch it like you don't have to. That's true I hope Nickelodeon does another broadcast of it that's what I'll be watching if they do. Then we got the Washington Capitals first place in the NHL East and the Winnipeg Jets first place in the NHL West and then NBA we've got the Cavaliers first place in the

East and the Thunder first place in the West and then baseball don't look now but spring training can be starting up in like a month. It's almost back. I can't even. It's just, like this season is a whole, it feels like it's a full year. It pretty much is for the most part. Although in here in LA it's gonna be a crazy year.

The team, dude, Dodgers? Dodgers have signed really everyone. Those tickets are gonna go for about $12 billion, yeah. My parents messaged me like, yo, you wanna do this? And I are going to go for about $12 billion. Yeah. My parents messaged me like, yo, you want to do this? And I was like, hell yeah, I'll go. The Dodgers have just spent money because there's no salary cap in baseball for whatever reason. Every other sport has a salary cap. And they're just like, what if we just spend as much money as we want? And they're like, I guess. and they've just signed like everyone.

Baseball has the same vibe as I think America in general, which is why it's our pastime. Every team, I think, you know, when they're talking about salary cap stuff, the Yankees for years and years and years were just destroying the salary cap, just absolutely buying the best team. And I think much like America in general the reason why no one wants to stop that stuff is because they themselves think one day they'll be that. Yeah it's possible. Like one day we'll have all the money in the world and we can beat them by using money which is now what the Dodgers are doing. Well the thing is it's a it actually doesn't work

as much as you would think because So many other teams actually do win. But it's one of those things where they do need a salary cap. But I think a lot of the players don't want the cap because then they get paid more. But the managers want the cap. Oh yeah, of course. So yeah. And I feel like at this point, most of the fans want the cap

because if you're a fan of just like the you know some rain like the Tampa Bay Rays or the Baltimore Orioles and you're like oh cool we can't spend as much because we don't have as much and then you're just like too bad. But if you're a fan of the Dodgers you're about to have an incredible crazy season. Yeah and then you're about to go to every single game and those are all every game will be sold out at home every single one. Yeah and I have to watch the Cubs who are the third biggest market and yet spend as if they're like the Pittsburgh Pirates or something it's like guys we have money you're gonna spend some of that and they're like no I don't think so that's sports all right Alright, what is our fact of the day? Fact of the day, fact of the day, fact of the day. The Spice Girls were originally a band called Touch.

You know what? Good call on changing it to Spice Girls. Touch is a weird name. That is a weird name they said when we first started with the name touch we were pretty bland Mel C told the Guardian in 2018 we felt like we had to fit into a mold so instead we chose that each one of us would be a different kind of girl much like the Powerpuff girls I'm the sassy one and I'm the sporty one and I'm the sexy one

and I'm the even sexier one and I'm the one that pretends to be a baby doll. Yeah, yeah, they definitely broke the mold. I'm the redheaded one. I mean, to be fair, being able to just be like, I'm this spice, like probably did make people remember them more being like that's 100% yes yeah like that spice yeah although shout out to scary spice my favorite one they were just like I'm you know baby spice and I'm sporty spice right and then it's just I'm scary spice it's hilarious it's funny. I'm the scary spice Why scary spice

Yeah, that's Mel B. Dude. Oh, yeah, that is Mel B. Okay, I see I Just remember I think Spice Girls were big when I was in like second or third grade Sure Spice Girls were when my cousin who is two years older than me She was very into Spice Girls like that was her that was during her high school life yeah yeah that's so what was that that would be her mid 90s yeah mid 90s for sure yeah they were formed in 94 right Right. And then Spice World came out. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So that mean there was a few years there, they were huge in the states.

But obviously they're a British band. Yeah. And as we've seen lately when it comes to British bands trying to make names here in the US, sometimes it works and sometimes you make a movie about being a monkey and people are like, what is this? this and you're like I don't know exactly that's your fact of the day all right does anyone come to us with tears in their eyes boy howdy have they gotten here with tears in here with tears. Gone here with tears. Dear illustrious sirs,

I come to you with tears in my eyes and my heart on display. Jesse Cox has been quoted to say on his critically acclaimed show Geekenders that if Geekenders on YouTube reach 200k views you get a tattoo of Dodger's Mushroom VTuber avatar. I humbly ask you this, if Cox and Krendor reach viewership milestone as to the one Jesse would want for GeekEnders what is the tattoo of Krendor's design Jesse would be required to get? Thank you for hearing

me out. Oh great ones. P.S. I would know, I would to know similar answers for each of your other pod guys. I mean this is very simple I would get you know how on your sweat pants you have the sloth yes I would have that tattoo put right on my body in the exact same spot easy done that's what I would do if we hit like a two hundred thousand every episode that's what I would do if we hit like a 200,000 every episode. That's what I would do. Yeah That's pretty good one. I feel like to illuminati. I would do the two not II that's pretty simple. That's an easy one Yeah, that's one where people be like whoa. He's got that cool tattoo or something. He's in the Illuminati. Yeah. Yeah, that's easy I think if I had the I mean I would I'd get like a space butterfly or something Hell yeah, dude

Yeah Like you just gotta you gotta find the coolest thing that some random person would see and be like there's a story behind that right, they think there's like some crazy story like I got the butterfly after I escaped my life of the past and Yeah, you can make up a whole story and be like I used to be addicted to porn But now I've changed and I'm free. I'm the butterfly come out of my cocoon people like wow dude. You really did it So yeah

That's that and then we've got Dear illustrious tears in my eyes I'd like to inquire if you've ever heard about the official anime mascot of the Vatican and the Catholic Church for 2025 First off. Thank you for coming to us with this second off. Not only have heard of it, in my playthrough of Dragon Quest III HD 2D remake, when you create your characters, I, one, made a character that's Krendor. He's an old fool who now is the strongest character I have, which honestly seems about right.

But also my cleric is a little tiny blue-haired girl in a little yellow outfit. And it looks exactly like the anime character that is representing the Catholic church and the Pope. Looks exactly like her. Not only am I aware of it, I am using her in a video game. That is, that is pretty funny. Yes, the one thing I am aware of also is that the internet is just the worst and immediately

rule 34 stuff appeared. Immediately. Well, if anything is on the internet, I just automatically assume. Right, yeah. There's always someone being dirty with it. Yup. I do love the fact that there's just like an old like Catholic Church priest uncovering this like anime girl. It's like, here it is. It's such a weird sight. I genuinely wonder what the thought process was.

Like who they're trying to connect with, you know? Like who they, is it a, the kids love anime so they'll get them to the church? Or is it, we're trying to outreach into Japan Or like I don't know why they did that Yeah, or maybe there's just a really young priest is like guys. Have you ever seen anime? Let me show you and they're like, wow, we need to make our own. I have no clue why Yeah, I don't know either but Somebody had to come up with that idea and been like this is a great way to get people in the seats.

The kids will love it. I want to know, if I went to a Catholic church right now, would they have posters of that? Like if you went to Sunday school, are there little anime posters of that girl? What's the deal? Oh, I thought I'd take a step further. I'd want her to like show up on the screen and like give a sermon. Hello! Let us open our Bibles to Matthew 24-7

I would love it! That would be amazing! That would be really great So yeah, there we go Alright, what is our big news story of the day? Big news story of the day? Big news story of the day, day, day, day, day, day, day. Sydney's stinky corpse flower attracts thousands wanting a whiff. Yep, that is that nasty flower that only blooms every so often and every time people are like, Dude, you gotta go! And all I hear is that it's the most rank, stanky thing that ever was

and I'm like, nah, I'm alright. Yeah, it's... Nah, I'm good. I gotta be good. The rare, unfurling of an endangered plant that amidst the smell of decaying flesh drew hundreds of devoted fans to a greenhouse in Sydney on Thursday where they joined three hour lines to experience a momentous bloom and in a fragrance evoking gym socks and rotting garbage

tall point and smelly the corpse flower is scientifically known as Amr foul Falis titanium or titanium or Bunga Bacai in Indonesia Bunga Bacai so much better. What are we doing way better? Bunga Bacai is an awesome name for a plant. You smell that Bunga? Yo, that's Bunga Bacai, man That's like the Ninja Turtle Cowabunga Bacai. Yeah, that's it. See and then when you smell you go Cowabunga Baccai. Yeah, see, and then when you smell it, you go, Kawabunga Baccai, man. That makes perfect sense. Bunga Baccai is a perfect, we just

got to stop making up scientific names for stuff and call it Corpse-Low or whatever. Bunga Baccai is a great name for a thing. That's a fantastic name. Yeah, yeah. But to fans of this specimen. She is putricia That's pretty good to putricia's good eagerly adopted by her followers who naturally call themselves putritions For a week all right. That's a cult

That's a that's a chaos cult. I've seen that before for a week She is graced a stately and gothic display in front of purple curtain and wreath and mist from a humidifier at the Royal Sydney Botanic Garden. Her rise to fame has been rapid with 20,000 admirers filing past for a moment in her increasingly pungent presence. No corpse flower has bloomed at the garden for 15 years. There are thought to be only 300 of the plants in the wild and fewer than a thousand including those in cultivation It only blooms every seven to ten years in its natural habitat The fact that they rarely open so they flower rarely is obviously something that puts them a little bit of Disadvantage in the wild said the garden spokesperson Sophie Daniel

I don't know why I gave her that voice. When they open they have to hope that another flowers open nearby and they can self pollinate. After seven years at the garden, Patricia's flower was spotted in December when she was just ten inches high. By Thursday she was five feet three inches taller, 1.6 meters. uh, as excitement grew about the unfolding bloom, garden staff erected crowd barriers, giving from behind velvet ropes and a display inspired by Queen Victoria's funeral, the Rocky Horror Picture Show and the... Ouvray? Of the late director David Lynch. Ouvray? What does that mean?

O-E-U-V-R-E? Ouvray? O-E... How... Ouvray? O-E-U-V-R-E? O-V-R-E? How? Ouvre? The oeuvre? Ouvre. Ouvre. Ouvre. Ouvre. Ouvre. That's what it says, but that doesn't seem right.

seem right. The works the painter yeah it says it's the works of a painter composer author regarded collectively yeah okay all right learn something new every day. Inside fans took selfies and leaned in for a sniff a more perilous prospect as putricia's odor developed people inhaled the slaughterhouse stench and canceled their dinner plans I am sickened Angus Dalton added I am in awe One young woman raised her hands and bowed as though in worship on social media garden staff performed a viral dance in front of the plant to Chapel Rhone's summer hit hot to go All right, yeah. It was difficult.

Nothing like a song about being horny to get a plan all worked up. Yeah, yeah. It was difficult to say why the regal, mysterious, and smelly flower had attracted such a following, but perhaps the answer lay in the reverence viewers felt in the presence of such an amazing living being. Along with her real-life visitors, Patricia's online fandom has been rapid, global, and deeply strange. A 24-7 livestream established by the Botanic Garden grew close to a million views in less

than a week and prompted a shared language of memes and inside jokes. Frequently deployed acronyms included WWTF or We Watch the Flower, WDNRP, We Do Not Rush Patricia or Putricia and BBTB, Blessed Be the Bloom. Yep. Commenters on social media plan to hurry the garden as the plant opens. In just 24 hours, Putricia's bloom and her stench would be gone. As she unfurled the plant heated to 37 degrees Celsius, 100 degrees Fahrenheit to better spread her scent, attracting flies and carrying beetles which burrowed

inside and laid eggs. Then work began to hand pollinate the plant in an effort to ensure the species diversity and survival. But first, thousands of putritians attempted to get as close as they could to their hero of a week. Quote, We did have a few conversations early on about whether or not we should have vomit bags, said Daniel, adding that the garden staff decided against it. I haven't heard of anyone actually being harmed. Dude, I- There's something about this plant that seems

very similar to pandas. Like, they just act like they don't want to survive. Yeah. It's up... We are literally keeping this and again, pandas, alive. Otherwise, just nature would kill

them. There's just... Like, this plant, the more you talk about it, the more I'm like, There's so few of them. It seems like nature doesn't want them to exist anymore Yeah, but here. We are like we got to keep it going dude everyone likes puking Yeah, it's like the planes like ah kill me I smell like death and everyone's like we gotta keep this thing alive We need this plant. It's a good tourist trap, it's like my pain, my life is pain. Imagine if this plant was a person and then every once in a while they just smelled terribly

and everyone's like dude gather round, they're about to smell really bad! So why does it open only so often when it's whole... I mean I guess that's the problem. Without a lot of pollination you're not going to get a lot of these plants. Yeah. So... So it genuinely seems like this plant doesn't want to live. It does. I agree. Just... but now it's going to live because we're just going to force it does I I agree just but now it's gonna live because we're just gonna force it to live I guess we got it on like that's that's that's our way dude that is our way and that's the big news story of the day all right thanks so much for listening and watching I'm enjoying this podcast

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