Cox n' Crendor Show - Episode 85 - Yumbo!

Episode Date: December 9, 2014

Jesse and Crendor discover the power of the Yumbo, then summarily dismiss it. Also, Crendor takes the time to remind Jesse how much of an old angry bastard he's become.

Hello everybody and welcome to Cocks and Crandor in the morning! Cox and Crendor in the morning! Hello everybody and welcome to Cox and Crendor in the morning. Hey. Yeah? I always... I thought you were going to tell us a secret. You were like, hey, I got a secret to tell you. No, it's like, I always try to think of something to say at the start. Sometimes it ends well, sometimes it doesn't end well.

Sometimes it just ends with like a really. Sometimes it just ends. Sometimes you just say, hey, and then nothing comes after it. Yeah. And we're all waiting. We're all waiting for you to say something else. Nothing comes. Nothing.

Sometimes that's the most anyone can hope for, really. I'm going to strongly disagree with you. Strongly. Strongly disagree. Can i just say so yeah before we say anything i listened to an old episode of this of this fine program go on and i feel like i've grown as a man and a human being And you've gotten a lot more angry at life. What? What? No. I used to laugh differently.

I used to laugh like, but now I'm just like, and you used to be a lot more jolly, and now you're like an evil jolly. I get my jollies from the suffering of others is what you're saying. That's probably what it is. You've just grown to get your jollies from the suffering of others. I thought you were saying that over the course of two years doing a podcast, we've slowly lost our minds.

Yeah. We've become jaded, cynical bastards. But I've grown as a jaded, cynical not me i have devolved yeah i am proof against evolution if you you put me all i'm saying is guys who go up against uh you know bill nye the science guy who are like evolution is not real just wheel me out and he'll be like oh my god you're right i've been wrong this entire time that sounds like a movie quote like i am the proof against evolution de-evolution though totally totally proven yeah you can definitely go backwards you can devolve i think humanity's definitely yes that is i also pronounced ut pronounce utero, utero. Like utero.

Utero. Today I got one of my pairs of headphones that I use when I play with like a PlayStation or whatever broke. And so I had to go get a new one. So I got one from Rocket called Cave. It starts with a K. Rocket Cave. And so, but I can't imagine that it's called Cave. I imagine it's like Cave or something. Because Rocket's not an American company.

Rock is one of them foreign companies. And so I imagine it's a Cave. It's Rock Cat. R-O-C Cat. So for the longest time I used to think it was called Ro-Cat. And then Rock Cat. And then I realized people just say Rocket. I was like, oh. Oh, okay. That's how youat. Rocat. And then Rock Cat, and then I realized people just say Rocket. I was like, oh.

Oh, okay. That's how you say it? Sure. So I got one of those. I've yet to open it, but I'm curious what it's like because I need a new one, and it looked really comfortable. I don't know anything about the sound quality or the microphone quality in it, but what I do know is that it looked very comfortable.

So that's all I care about. At this stage, you'll settle for comfort. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Now I'm at that old man stage, you'll settle for comfort. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Now I'm at that old man stage where I'll settle for comfort. Like, oh, yeah. Comfort's good. That's why I got my headphones.

They're like pillows. Right? Yeah. Well, you use those headphones all the time. The headphones I use are ones for recording and mixing and stuff like that on my computer. Yeah. I don't think I've listened to sound on a computer without headphones in five years, which is really weird.

I haven't experienced a recent video game on a computer that has had stereo sound. It's always just been, like, headphones. Well, I have my sound ones on right now that are really good, but, like, they get really uncomfortable, so I only use them for sound editing because the other ones that are really comfortable, they have really heavy bass. So if I do like a lot of bass that sounds like normal bass to regular headphone users, on those it sounds like... It's like super bass. Yeah, headphones are a pain in the ass. Like every headphone is different and you need to find one that works for you. But the problem is in order to find one that works for you, you have to buy them.

Yeah. And the only ones they let you sample at stores are like Beats. And Beats are just expensive, awful headphones. Look, you got Beats on right now. Congratulations on your Beats purchase. I'm sure Dr. Dre is a wonderful man. Yeah. But with that said, is it Jay-Z who does Beats? No, it's Dr. Dre.

No, it's Dr. Dre. It's Dre. Beats by Dre. Does Jay-Z have his own thing, like his own? He probably does. Like Beats by Jay. It's probably called like like beats by J they're probably it's probably Called like beats by J it's like Dre but J Z

And the beats has a Z yeah Oh man he doesn't have that B E E T Z B E E T Z Yeah no that's the only ones They let you use and they're they're just like Glorified normal headphones but they have a really Deep bass and they're probably very good for like i don't know bassy music but it's like 90 of things

that exist aren't bassy music but it's like i got mine that are like sony and they're comfortable and i got them for like 50 bucks on amazon while beats by dre are like 150 oh no that's like the low end beats the good ones the ones that are actually worth your money, are like $400, and that's not worth the money. No. Not at all. It's insane. It's insane. There's a lot of really great ones out there.

I can't believe we started this podcast with a head-to-head discussion. There's a lot of really great ones out there. The ones I use for audio editing are these ATH-M50Xs. They're like the new model. They're really good. They're a little more bassy than the normal ATH-M50Xs. They're like the new model. They're really good. They're a little more bassy than the normal ATH-M50s, but they're very good, high quality.

You can hear every sound. I have Sennheiser ones. I have all sorts of different headphones. Yeah, I'm wearing Sennheiser for those. I have a closet full of headphones. They're all very good. Notice none of those are gaming brand headphones Like Razer and stuff like that

Or Corsair Those are fine if you're gaming I mean the Rocket ones I just got I only use for Playstation 4 But that's in an entirely different room And that's because like I don't want to use the awful headphones the Playstation 4 gave you That's like

Put these little pinky things on with this little awful microphone. They give you a headache after 10 minutes. Yeah, no, those are awful. So, yeah, I'd rather spend the money for something comfortable, but I don't know. I agree. I don't know. That was an interesting start. How about we get to something really important?

Really important. Probably should have started at the top of the show with this, but we're going to keep hammering it home. If you're going to PAX South, guys. Oh, yeah. You should definitely come see us we're gonna be there live cox and crendor is gonna have our own panel we might be there live they might just be holograms of us it could be hog i'm just gonna assume that no one wanted panels at packs this year i agree because they gave us this panel and i didn't fight for it at all i was like

maybe we could like could we do a panel maybe? And they were like, yeah, no, okay, sure, great Yeah, they were like, you're part of the Video Gaming Conference of America I'm like, whoa Yeah, PAX South, I'm in So we have a panel now It's Sunday at 1230, so we're gonna be at PAX South It's the last day, lunch time

Perfect, perfect time for a panel Yep Crandor, can we bring lunch? Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Can we bring lunch for people? We're going to bring lunch. Oh, my God. It'll be just like every live thing.

We're going to go get lunch and we're going to eat it live on stage. Oh, yeah. That's what I do best. In front of an audience of hungry people. I've done that. Yes. Like, oh, my God. I've done that like over 50 times.

That's what we're going to do. That's what we're going to do. We're going to eat. We're going to go get lunch and eat it there in front of people. It's going to be something delicious. It's going to be something ridiculous and delicious. Oh, yeah. Oh, because it's in Texas.

We're going to get barbecue. Oh, yeah. Messy barbecue. That sounds good to me. And just eat it live on stage. Done. Done. That's part of our panel right now.

That is part of the panel. We'll let you guys tell us what you want us to do in our panel. But step one is we're going to eat barbecue. We'll let you guys tell us what you want us to do in our panel, but step one is we're going to eat barbecue. We're going to eat barbecue live on stage in front of people. Not the McRib. No, real barbecue.

Yeah, real barbecue. Real Texas barbecue. Oh, this is happening. This is happening. It's going to be fantastic. Oh, man. How many... There's some people

that can't even eat in front of people or I just get too self-conscious. I'm like, I've eaten in front of like a thousand people we're gonna go full barbecue it's gonna be delicious we're gonna get one let's order one of everything on a menu and just make this huge buffet in front of us only eat a little bit there like clean it up like and then just have have crew throw it away at the end and be like sorry go get i mean you're right we've become awful people it's true

we've become horrible people wow yep wow we've become told you people i told you uh if you can't if you can't if you can't make it to the sunday one because you don't have tickets for sunday uh we'll be i think podcasting every day at the start of the show from a booth there for like an hour or so, and then we'll just dick around on the floor. Or Crendor will just leave. Go home and find barbecue and leave. Yeah, it's possible. But all those things are happening, so watch

yourself. Watch yourself, planet Earth. Yeah, watch yourself. Lose yourself. Uh-huh. Feel the moment inside of you. Is how you uh pick up women hey do you want to feel the moment inside of you oh my god can i talk about something i mean yeah if it's related to that yes i was talking about feeling moments inside of you my friend today linked me a thing on this uh it's called tulpa uh what now uh tulpa which it's about imaginary friends

or imaginary things in your mind that people create in their mind to like what connect with their subconscious what all right so the frequently asked question what is tulpa as per the front page a tulpa is believed to be an autonomous consciousness existing within their creator's minds, often with a form of their creator's initial choice and design. A Tulpa is entirely sentient and in control of their opinions, feelings, form, and movement. They are willingly created by people via a number of techniques to act as companions, muses, and advisors. This is apparently becoming a very popular thing now. Are you sure this just isn't crazy people like schizophrenics?

No, there's even a thing. It says, isn't this just trying to give yourself schizophrenia, multiple personality disorder, blah, blah, blah. Isn't that a problem? It says, no, those are mental illnesses that impair your ability to function in daily life. This is totally not crazy. Tulpa is a form of a healthy multiplicity that does not impede your mind or body. So you create another person inside of you that you project? Yeah. So, for example, this guy, he made a person in his mind, and it's, like, connected with his subconscious.

And he could have conversations with his, like, created thing in his mind. And he'll be like, hey, remember when I went to dinner, like, last week? Was I wearing a green shirt? And the thing will be like, no, you were wearing a red shirt. And he's like, oh, yeah, you're right. And, like, it actually has your memory, but it's in your mind. And it's like, why couldn't he just remember it himself? Why couldn't he be like, what did I wear that day?

And then think about it for a minute instead of being like, hey, person I created in my mind, what was I wearing? Like that's, that's borderline creepy. It's like, if you, if you ever listened to ever listen to Carl Pilkingen talk about himself, he talks about how he asks himself questions. He's like, hey Carl, what do you think? Is that like that?

This is a crazy person thing, isn't it? This is crazy people. Well, it says, is this a new phenomenon? No sane person goes, hey, other person in my mind, what was I doing yesterday? Well, Jesse. That doesn't happen.

That doesn't happen. You just think. Apparently. Oh, yeah, okay. That's what I was wearing. You don't even question it yourself. Like, hmm, what was I wearing? Sometimes if you're like me and you talk out loud all the time, you might say, what was I doing yesterday?

But then you don't go, hey might say, what was I doing yesterday? But then you don't go, hey, Jessica, which I guess is the other me. Jessica, what was I wearing yesterday? You weren't wearing anything, Jesse. That's right. Like, no one does that. No one sane does that. Okay, well, these people do. And they say, is this a really new phenomenon?

They say, no, it's a practice that goes back in recorded history as far as the Greek philosophers and their practice known as daemonism. To who? To who? Name someone. Name someone who has done this that wasn't a quack. Socrates. Name someone.

Do they list Socrates? No. Well, there you go. He wasn't one of them. You can't just make stuff up, Crandall. I'm not making it up. They're there you go. He wasn't one of them. You can't just make stuff up, Crandall. I'm not making it up. They're making it up. The present name of this phenomenon is derived from the word used by Tibetan monks in the early 20th century.

There's also evidence to suggest dedicated prayer can lead to the development of religious tulpa in the minds of the particularly devout. So is this saying that people who see angels then are just making it up? Is that what this is saying? Possibly. Is that what this is saying? I feel like we need to start some stuff right now between devout religious people and then these guys. Then we'll see who's right.

Okay, this is how it works apparently. By talking and fleshing out something to your own subconscious for so long, you start to receive answers from them. The answers will tend to align themselves with all the preconceived traits you give them. The answers you get may surprise you, and in doing so, show independent sentience. The sentience can be thought of as the core of the tulpa. The rest is just building a form in your mind for them to take, allowing for deviation of that form, and finally trying to visualize the form and experience it in sensory detail

in your own environment until it becomes natural and you do it without thinking. Not only does that make no effing sense, that also sounds like a lot of hard work for something that is vague as balls. That is so vague. It is vague. Read back the first sentence of that again, please. By talking and fleshing out something to your own subconscious for so long, you start to receive answers from them. What does that mean?

Nothing is what that means. That is a nonsense sentence. That is a nonsense sentence. That is a nonsense sentence. It doesn't make any sense. Okay, okay. Maybe. But how do you talk to your subconscious if your consciousness – can your consciousness be aware of your subconscious? I don't – I feel like we're reading into something that the only people who have ever read are crazy people.

So they find this. They're like – Like David Lynch. to something that the only people who have ever read are crazy people. So they find this. They're like, oh, don't you see, like, man, if you just say something to your subconscious every once in a while, it'll talk back to you, man. And then if you keep doing it, it'll, like, become someone. And it's like another thing that exists in the ether, man.

And then once you've, like, formed a bond with it, you, like, give it a physical shape. That shape can be whatever your mind's eye perceives it to be. And after giving it that shape, you can then bring it into reality, man. That's nonsense. That is gibberish. I definitely agree with you. I talk to little David all the time. I agree with you. I talk to little David all the time, and he tells me the things that I think about and agrees that many of my brain fish I've imagine the river of your mind and the brain fish catch the ideas

and the remembrances of yesterday. I would buy that in a heartbeat. I would buy, like, you must go to the fishing trip in your mind, to the river of knowledge, and pluck the remembrance fish from the river, and for each bite you take of that fish, you experience

the memories of yesteryear. I'd buy that in a heartbeat. I'd buy that more than whatever the hell the other thing was talking about. At least this makes sense. I almost feel like it's a form of meditation or something. It is. It is. It's exactly a form of meditation.

The problem is that it's taking it to the nth crazy nth crazy degree where meditation isn't – it's nothing – whatever. It's like you just start meditating so hard that you start dreaming and you just start – like, you can create a dream character. Who is your friend? Who is this person? Does this person follow this stuff? Can we get that person on the podcast to be like, yeah, no, so I talked to my friend Azrael. No, this is my friend bonky uh-huh and what does he and what does he do this no but he is like i know somebody to do it

and he today so who he linked me look we need this person on the podcast all right so this is what this is what he messaged me today man my schedule was good for a few days then the other night i couldn't sleep and decided to take the three melatonin pills try and knock it out quick i messed up my sleep schedule so bad and i had some crazy ass dreams had a dream i was fighting a giant he fell on me and i bit into his eyeball and then he's like and i was like oh i had the same thing where melatonin gave me some crazy dreams which it did that happened like two years ago and so he was like that's weird and then he's like lol man you ever heard of tulpa this shit's weird and i said no i haven't he's like i just learned about it so many people do it it's weird as hell basically delving into having an imaginary

friend as an adult and they have like their own personalities and shit that's what he said first off your friend is much more interesting than you are. So I feel like it's time to replace you. That guy's got it figured out. He's got crazy stuff happening to him all the time. What are you doing? You're going to Ikea. You're not doing anything.

Get him on the podcast. I mean, he would come on the podcast. He's bonky. I've made videos with him. He's got some crazy stories, too. He's got some crazy stories too. He's had some crazy shit go down. Well, uh-huh, uh-huh.

Oh man, I wish I could have asked your parents about that from the Q&A thing. I wish I could too. My parents would be like, that's weird. I know what my parents would say. My dad would be like, I can see it happening. My mom would be like, that's weird. My dad would be like, yeah, but it is weird is jesse are you saying you have an imaginary friend because it's okay but we're gonna have to take you to the hospital be like like are you are you

gay loving your imaginary it's okay if you are oprah says it's okay oprah says it's okay if you're gay loving your imaginary friend it's okay i have no problem with that but it's okay to tell us if you want to tell us. Oh yes. My parents are still on that. The very first day they got back here when they came to visit we were in the car and my parents were like, so why aren't you coming home for

Christmas? I was like, I don't know. I'm going to try and get a bunch of work done. And they're like, because that's why they came out here for Thanksgiving. I wasn't getting home for Christmas so they were going to try and get a bunch of work done. And they're like, because that's why they came out here for Thanksgiving. So I wasn't getting home for Christmas, so they were going to come up Thanksgiving. And I was like, I got a bunch of stuff to do. I might spend some time doing some stuff. And they're like, is it with a girl, Jesse? I'm like, Mom, is it with a girl?

I'm like, maybe. And they're like, is it with a boy, Jesse? Is it with a boy? Is that why it's a maybe? And I'm like, what do you mean? They're like, it're like, is it with a boy, Jesse? Is it with a boy? Is that why it's a maybe? And I'm like, what do you mean? They're like, it's okay if it's with a boy. I'm like, what are you? It's okay.

We're not going to be mad at you. Yeah, whatever. My favorite was when your dad was just like, I just love pie. It's my favorite thing. Look, very few times in my life have I been able to end a video so perfectly as when my dad goes on like a Forrest Gump level Bubba tangent about pie. French silk? Apple? Pumpkin pie?

And he's like, oh, blueberry? He just keeps listing them off. He's like, strawberry? Yep. Ice cream? Oh, so good. He's like, I like pie. For the meetup, he came on on tell me about coach ditka he's like is this the cred dog himself like it is me he's like i'm telling you

about coach that you guys missed out for those of you who for those of you who missed out our our patreon meetups that we do every month you missed out in a good one this time my dad came on the chat and he let everyone know Coach Dicka is from Pittsburgh and he prefers Pumanti Brothers. Pumanti Brothers more than Polis Sausage and that he barely spent any time in Chicago. Oh, he laid the law

down. He laid the law. And Crandall was just like I don't even. I was like, I don't even know. And then he talked to Thomas. Oh my goodness. It was pretty great. You missed out if you weren't there. You missed out. You missed out. Speaking of missing out, we're missing out on going to Chapter 5, 7 of the Scouts, Crandor. Crandor, how's that traffic out there?

Oh, man, the traffic today. There's not too much of it. But if we look down there, we got a seems like Bill Powell is down there. He's driving to work alone. He's just cruising down the highway. He's going like he's on one of those car commercials. And who else is down there? That's driving to work alone. He's just cruising down the highway. He's going like he's on one of those car commercials. And, uh, who else is down there? That's another car. Oh, no, that's a bike.

Someone's riding their bike. That's Michael Richards. Michael Richards, I haven't seen you since the old bike racing days of 14th... Ah! Here we go! Bike racing! Oh, man, I got a signal cut in there. Seems like somebody was hijacking our radio. I don't know what's up with that. I'm going to send it back to you in the studio. Get that checked out.

Thanks, Crendor. Yeah. Now let's head over to Crendor at the weather desk. How's the weather out there? Oh, man. Let me tell you something about the weather. It's intense out there. Mans are getting knocked down by giant icicles.

What? What did you just say mans are getting knocked down by giant icicles reading the weather channel articles it is man knocked down by giant icicle but i said mans's knocked down by a giant icicle. Yep. Doesn't even look like he's getting hit by an icicle. Looks like he's getting hit by a balloon. Damn it, Weather Channel. Let's go to, we were talking about Texas. Let's go to Weatherford, Texas.

I bet they got some nice weather in Weatherford. It is horrific apocalypse weather in Weatherford. Very apocalyptic tonight. It is horrific apocalyptic weather in Weatherford. Very apocalyptic tonight. It's 42 degrees. But today it's going to be a nice 67 degrees. Good walking weather. You can take a

walk outside and really feel comfortable like you're in your house. You got 66, 63, 65, 65, 63 for the rest of the week. So, you know, you can go walking every day. Why not have a walking party with your friends? Wonderful.

Yeah. Wonderful Weatherford. Welcome to Wonderful Weatherford, Texas. Wonderful Weatherford, Texas. I want it to be one of those commercials where they're like, come to our state. We have these things. Like, you know, they have those all over. Like with California, it's always Arnold Schwarzenegger. Yeah. Itner he's like we come to our state i used to be the governor and he's like

drinking wine on the beach there's a new one now that is like california we've got all types of boards and then it's like snowboards and wakeboards and surfboards, you know, the whole thing. Yeah. And at the end it's like, the only kind of board we don't have is a board you. Like, it's awful. It's like the only kind of board not here is you. I'm like, what the hell commercial is this? I thought you were going to say like wooden boards that are nailed to the closed down houses that drug people stay in. Well, I mean, we have those. Or thedown houses that drug people stay in. Well, I mean, we have those. Or the cardboard houses that homeless people build.

We have those, too. I mean, we have all that. We have lots of boards. We have every board you can think of except for the board you. The board rooms where the people sit in to steal the Hollywood people's money. We got those, too. Yep. California, come here.

The only thing not board is you. Oh, see, we just made a better one that's an even better one that's an even better one man why aren't we being hired for this i don't know if somebody was no wonder we're so cynical we're so mean and cynical now because no one cares about that we're geniuses i know right we've been doing this for so you would think at least five people would have sponsored us with like a million dollars each. Zero. Zero. Zero people.

The only thing not bored is you. Yep. The only not bored is you. Done. We just made an amazing ad. Wow. I would have been like, I'm going to California right now. Yep.

They've got so many boards there. But not me. I won't be bored. Yeah. All right. What's going on in sports? Sports. We got some crazy stuff happening over in the sports land.

NFL stuff happened. Jeff Fisher, coach of the Rams, trolled the Redskins in RG3. So for the coin toss, they send out their captains to call the coin toss. Well, the Redskins traded a bunch of draft picks for RG3. And essentially, RG3 has been playing very badly. Very badly. Very badly. And the Rams got a bunch of pretty good players out of that trade.

So they pretty much got a bunch of good players in exchange for RG3. And Jeff Fisher, coach of the Rams, sent Janoris Jenkins, Michael Brockers, Zach Stacey, Stedman Bailey, Greg Robinson, and Alec Ogletree to midfield for the coin toss. All six of those players were acquired as a result of the Rams' blockbuster Robert Griffin III trade in 2012. So he essentially just was like, hey, look what you could have had, but you don't. Yeah, you big dummy.

Yeah, you dummies. And now the Redskins suck, and the Rams are kind of good. The moral of the story is if you're kind of good, be sure to rub that in. Yeah, rub it in. Let everyone know you're pretty not bad. Or let's go talk to your imaginary friend about it. Hey, Jessica. Yes, Jesse.

What do you think about RG3? I think he's pretty washed up. RG4 is better. That's what I think. Wow, we're on the same page. It sounds like it could be an ASMR video like, Welcome to the spaceship. We'll be accepting your application.

Dude, I've watched way too many ASMR videos. It's so great. I can't even. I think I'm. Great is not the word I would use. I would use it's sort of hypnotic. Yeah.

But it's also unsettling. Very unsettling. You thought it was weird at first. There's one where this girl is doing Pokemon cards. She's going through Pokemon cards, but she's giving Pokemon facts, right? And the but she's giving Pokemon facts, right? And the facts she's giving

are okay, like Pokemon, like the history of Pokemon, stuff like that, but then halfway through she's like, did you know that in one area of Pokemon, there's a song that plays, and rumor has it that that song killed people. And a lot of children died

from that song that played and rumor has it that if you find a copy of that game when you play that song you'll kill yourself and it's like what is going on right now it is it becomes suddenly very creepy and you're just like oh my god that's why i just watched watch the asian woman make pancakes instead instead. But that's just as weird because she's like, Hello. I love you. Do you want to see me make pancakes? It's like, this is just as weird.

This is not any better. This is just as creepy. You just got to find what's good for you. It's like... No, none of them are good. They're all... There's one that... Here's No! None of them are good. They're all... There's one... There's one that...

Here's what 90% of them are. Very attractive women whispering at a camera. That is true. That's what 90% of them are just that. And the reason why people watch them is because of weird stuff where it's like... There's this one girl. All she does is like ear-to-ear stuff. Oh, yeah.

By the way, I'm starting to know like all the lingo, which is very weird. And so basically she just like whispers in one ear like... stuff. Oh yeah. By the way I'm starting to know like all the lingo which is very weird. And so basically she's just like whispers in one ear like hey hey I'm in this ear now. And I just go to the other and be like

I'm in this ear now though. I always didn't like those. It's really creepy. It's really creepy. They're not good. I can understand how some people would like them because it's one of those like

comforting like someone's with you but at the same time it's one of those, like, comforting, like, someone's with you. But at the same time, it's creepy as shit. A lot of times, I just like them for sounds because I remember back in high school, I'd be in the morning. I was like, I'm tired and whatever. And my one friend, he would, like, play the table drum or he was just sitting at the, like, library table just being like. And it was very calming to me. And I was like, like yeah I like that

and then when he'd stop I'd be like oh and so like I like noises like that so I always like the nail tapping or scratching or I like people like the bass heavy noises like table drumming the problem is that these are like

hi well that's how I discovered it. I'm going to make popcorn today. I'm going to hold the microphone up to the popcorn as it pops so you can hear it go pop, pop, pop. It's weird, Frendor. It's weird. Yet, I will admit, I'm still fascinated by it. Completely and totally fascinated.

How many have you listened to now? Oh, I don't listen. I also watch. Because sometimes when I'm bored, when videos are uploading or I'm running a video, I'll just surf the internet. And sometimes I'll just sit there and watch. And they're so bonkers crazy. Just too many. Too many.

I used to do it with, like four or five years ago, my weird obsession was magic tricks. I'd watch people do magic tricks, and then I'd try to figure out how they did them. So I'd watch the magic trick, and then I'd go, like, Google search, like, how it was done, and then I'd go back and watch it again, and be like, oh! I see how the, like, that was my obsession. The problem was, the only people who did that

were, like, young kids. So at the time, if you went through my thing, it would have been, my history would have been young kids doing magic tricks. it would have been my history would have been young kids doing magic tricks Which but like who is this weirdo now now my problem is if you go through my history. It's all like ASMR videos of like Beautiful women face first in a microphone which looks just as weird. Oh really good ones the scalp massage I like that noise. I don't no are those the ones where they like

role play i don't listen to those those are weird well like they're they kind of they're like welcome to sensitizes massage parlor it's like lay down oh yeah there's one that's like she's like she's like doing a shipping thing she's like so hey welcome i'm gonna take your order and ship this crate out for you and And it's like, what? What is happening? They have so many. It's like literally everything you can imagine. There's one where it's like you're a preschooler getting a book read to you.

There's one where it's like someone's tucking you in at night. There's one like you're at the dentist's office. Like, why would you want to be at the dentist's office? I guess you're right. Some people find different situations comforting. So each one has their own, like, flavor. The problem is it's weird. It's just like creating a mind person. It's weird.

You should ask your mind person about ASMR. Ask your mind person today if ASMR is right for you. You won't be bored. Oh, yeah, that's sports. All right. What is going on? What's our big news story of the day? Take us home, buddy.

Big news story. We're coming home. I found this mini news story I had to go over first. It's going to be covered in like one minute. Burger King brings back the Yumbo sandwich after a 40-year hiatus. I'm sorry, what is that? The Yumbo. Yes, what is that?

It's like Wumbo, but Yumbo. It debuted in 1968. It was officially retired in 1974. It'll cost $3.69. Wait, we have never seen this before. This is before both of us. This is before our time. What is this sandwich? This is the Yumbo ham and cheese sandwich.

Wait, what? It's a ham and cheese sandwich. Burger King. I'm sorry. sandwich and burger king have the worst they have the worst ideas burger king burger king is the olive garden of fast food they're so desperate right now olive garden is like come in and get your free americano italian chili poppers and olive garden like what no wonder no one eats at Olive Garden anymore. What is that? And breadsticks and mediocre salad.

Okay, so. It's a ham and cheese sandwich. It's just a ham and cheese sandwich. It's got some lettuce and some sauce and ham and cheese on a bun. That's it. So why wouldn't you just go to Arby's? If you want to suffer through that, why wouldn't you just go to Arby's? I have no idea.

I don't. There's a reason why it doesn't exist anymore. It hasn't existed for 40 years. They're so desperate that they're reaching back 40 years in hopes of rejuvenating Burger King. I have not eaten at a Burger King in maybe seven years. Maybe more. I haven't eaten there in like two and a half years. No, I ate there once in two and a half years no i ate there once in two

and a half years and i didn't like it i can't i i can't think like there was a time back when i was much younger where i liked the taste of burger king hamburgers more than mcdonald's hamburgers yeah but that was when i was like 13 so so i i i think it's literally been seven years i haven't been to a burger king in so long like i can't remember what burger king tastes think it's literally been seven years. I haven't been to a Burger King in so long. Like, I can't remember what Burger King tastes like. It's just got that grill taste to it, too. It's like a crappy hamburger, but it's grilled. So it's kind of like, oh.

And McDonald's, I can say that I've been there recently because I went and got that awful McCock's and Cranmer. Yeah. So I can't do another one of those. I don't go to McDonald's. I clearly went and promoted it. So.

The awfully good Cox and Crandor sandwich. Yeah, I don't know. I mean, I don't go to Arby's. I haven't been to Arby's in maybe 15 years.

And so. Hold on, hold on. RG in the comments has a 26 thumbed up, zero thumb down thing that says, Not the same thing. The old yumbo is just ham and cheese on a large round bun.

Microwaved, and the taste was wonderful. Bought one yesterday. It included some awful lettuce on a seeded sub-bun and wasn't even warm. Thanks for the new and improved. Bravo, man. Here's the thing. Go to the store. Buy some ham and cheese.

Put it on bread. Put on bread, and eat it. You can microwave it if you want. Here's the thing. I don't want to spoil this for you. You can go to a store, buy a whole pack. Hell, you can go to the deli, buy a fresh pound of ham, buy a bunch of cheese, buy a whole loaf of bread. You can have a yumbo every day of the week. Three times a day. That's three yumbo's. That's three yumbo's a day. I yumbo,

you yumbo. For the price of maybe two yumbo's. Yeah. I'm just saying. I'm just saying. It seems stupid. It does seem stupid. I never got the appeal of ham and cheese anyway. It's just like when I was younger in high school, my friends would always go to a Chinese buffet.

And I would never want to go because the first time I went with them, the first and only time I went with them, the Chinese buffet, half the buffet was like tater tots and steakums and all sorts of crap. I was like, this isn't Chinese. Macaroni and cheese. Oh, yeah, mac and cheese. I was like, they isn't Chinese. Macaroni and cheese. Oh, yeah, mac and cheese. I was like, they had a frozen yogurt machine. I was like, this is clearly just a buffet where a majority of the food is Chinese food, but the rest of it is still just buffet food. Yeah.

I was like, I don't want any of this. I was like, this is a horrible, and I have never been to a Chinese buffet since. That scarred your Chinese buffet. Well, I have no reason to. All Chinese buffets are pretty disgusting The only ones that are good are like dim sum But that's not a buffet That's like they have stuff they bring around

And little carts and you get to pick Aren't those like quality things Well yeah and they're meant for like And there's stuff that most people would be like Right A lot of it is because it's real food And it's not like welcome to the Chinese buffet Here's your tater tots

The ancient Chinese tater tots. The ancient Chinese tater tot. Burger King, Burger King is the Chinese buffet of fast food. Like, here's the nutrition information for the Yumbo is American cheese, black forest ham, lettuce, mayonnaise, toasted hoagie bun. That's, why would you ever buy that? But for, it has 1,700 milligrams of sodium? That has to be from the meat. That has to be from the meat.

That has to be some, like, super, super funky meat that is double processed. Like, you could go to any grocery store in the world and get better quality meat than what is ever on that. There's nowhere in the world that is necessary to buy that sandwich. That's an insane. That's like three times your daily value of sodium. Look, it's that yumbo, man. You got it.

It'd be funny if all the sodium was in the lettuce. That's how we keep it fresh. That's how we keep that lettuce fresh. We salt that. This picture is some guy making the yumbo like oh man this yumbo is yummy why do they call it the yumbo that's not even like does it stand for something yeah what the yumbo there's gotta be some story behind the yumbo can you can you wiki the yumbo i'm gonna yumbo is a small industrial city in western Columbia. Uh-huh. Sure.

No, no, no. If they say that the Yumbo is named for that city, I feel bad for the citizens of that city. Hold on. There's got to be. Burger King's bad. Let's see. Yumbo Burger King Wiki. Here we go. Burger King products.

It's loading. Here we go. Now we just search for the Yumbo. There is no yumbo. Not even the Burger King wiki is willing to admit that the yumbo ever existed. Hold on. I found it. I think I found it.

Yumbo is a ham and cheese sandwich. Original. We know that. Introduced by Burger King in 1968. Continued on the menu. Wait. This one is poorly written. In December 2014, the sandwich would return to the

menu yumbo it doesn't say what it no i don't think anybody knows what the yumbo is like it's just a shitty name wait the yumbo there's uh on their facebook page bring the yumbo back it appears that ravenna anastasia had a yumbo. She said, Burger King lies. I had one yesterday. No mayo and no lettuce. It was awful. A glorified hot dog bun with a few slices of grocery store ham and the American

processed cheese food slices were not even melted. Absolutely nothing like the original yumbo. Waste of money. They brought back something that nobody likes. So far, every single person we've read has been like, this is gross. What did you think it was going to be? Here's the thing.

How do you mess up a ham and cheese sandwich? I don't get it. How is this worse than the old ham and cheese sandwich? How do you screw up a ham and cheese? They knew how to make a ham and cheese sandwich. It's not that hard to make a ham and cheese sandwich. Like what? How do you screw up a ham and cheese? They knew how to make a ham and cheese sandwich. Like it's not that hard to make a ham and cheese sandwich. It's not like you're making chicken cordon bleu. It is pretty simple.

Like how do you screw that up? It is literally bread, meat, and cheese. That's it. The name is in the description of it. Ham and cheese sandwich. That's it. That's it. That's it.

How do you screw that up? But, yum. Okay. It's got to stand for something. Like, your uncle may buy Orville. Uh-huh. Or it could be. Or it could be.

It could be, or it could be, you underachieving moron bought our shit. Our shit's one word. Our shit. Our shit. There you go. There you go. Done. Done.

Yep. All right. Well, you know what? Let's save our other story. All right. Let's save our other story for tomorrow. We'll come back. We'll do it then. Thank you guys for watching listening whatever

you're doing right now but as always oh yeah that's just repeating whatever you're doing you asshole and as always to be continued