Creating Confidence with Heather Monahan - #171: The Breakthrough Formula You NEED To Reach Success! With Life Optimization Coach David Nurse

Episode Date: December 7, 2021

In This Episode You Will Learn About:   Realizing your potential  Utilizing the Breakthrough Formula to reach success   Optimizing your strengths  Resources: Website: www.davidnurse.com  Pre-Order The Breakthrough to be released on Thursday 12/9 Join Be The Breakthrough  Listen to The Pivot & Go! Podcast w/David Nurse Youtube: @David Nurse  LinkedIn: @David Nurse  Instagram: @davidnursenba Facebook & Twitter: @DavidNurseNBA Overcome Your Villains is Available NOW! Order here: https://overcomeyourvillains.com  If you haven't yet, get my first book Confidence Creator Show Notes:  We all have different strengths for a reason. The key is to work on refining those strengths in order to realize all of your potential! Each choice we make determines the breakthroughs that we experience. Defining who you are on the inside is KEY to taking that next courageous step to discovering the BEST version of yourself. You WILL reach your goals!  About The Guest: I can’t wait to re-introduce you to David Nurse, NBA life and optimization coach, podcast host, author, and worldwide motivational speaker. He has helped hundreds of NBA players with professional development and growth, both on and off the court. Today David is here to share with us his expertise and inspire our own personal growth!   See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

And building your team, we all have different strengths. We're often told that you have to improve your weaknesses. But weaknesses are just a compliment's wish list. We all have different strengths for a reason that you put together with other strengths to make this ultimate team. So if you think about it, the best teams, the best cultures are not a bunch of the same strengths. The Chicago Bulls, 1998, Michael Jordan, best score.

Scotty Pippen, the best wingman sidekick. Steve Kerr, the best shooter, Dennis Rodman, the best crazy man. You don't know what he's going to do on the court that night. Like these different what I call misfits come together to make this ultimate team. I'm on this journey with me. Each week when you join me, we are going to chase down our goals. Overcome adversity and set you up for a better tomorrow. I'm ready for my close-up.

Well, welcome back. I'm so excited to reintroduce you to my now friend. Okay, first of all, if you've been listening to show, you've been with me for a while, then you have definitely heard of David's nurse before. But what's funny and interesting behind the scenes, and yes, David, I'm going to talk for a minute. It's going to be really painful for you, but I got to give the behind the scene.

Okay, so I was having a really bad day. I don't even know how long goes. It was a while ago. I was having a bad day. Shocker, that happens quite often during a global pandemic. And I remember, I looked at my calendar and I thought, who is this guy that I'm interviewing today? I don't want to do it.

I just, I'm not feeling it. I don't want to let you guys down, obviously, you're so important to me. And I thought, if I'm not going to show up as that best version of myself today, maybe I should go ahead and reschedule. But then the other side of me thinks it's so rude to not value other people's time. And if you made a commitment, you've got to show up, Heather. So that side usually wins out. And so I thought, okay, put your best game face on, just muscle through it, make it short, whatever, and get off there. And so I clicked, connect to you. We were on Zoom. And all of a sudden, and David's face shows up.

And he's all smiles, super high energy. And I thought, oh, my God, who is this guy? And I said to you, hey, David, listen, I'm letting know. I'm like, having a tough day, whatever. You're like, I got you? No, you don't worry. But meanwhile, guys, he's on my show. And I don't know him.

I've never met him before. He was recommended to me as a guest. And he's like, no, no, no, I've got you. Don't worry. And then I started laughing. And the next thing you know, I left that interview in such a better mood. It turned my day around, right? It was one of those examples, typically when you get the opportunity to speak about yourself,

when you get the opportunity to empty your glass, you walk away feeling better. Actually, dopamine is fired in the brain. This is pure science. The more you talk about yourself, that's a way to make yourself feel better. But here I was asking someone else questions about them, which couldn't potentially be more draining, but because he was feeding me such positive energy, I left that exchange feeling amazing. And ever since that day, we've been friends. I feel so lucky, David to call you, my friend.

You're the most giving, generous, real deal person out there. And I'm so grateful to have you, David Nurse, back on the show today. Heather, that's probably the coolest introduction I have ever. I honestly didn't even know that. So everybody listening, just know, if you're having a bad day, this is going to change your life today. It has the potential to it. It truly does.

Don't minimize who you surround yourself with, what you choose to listen to, because it really has an impact. There are people out there. We know them that suck the life out of you. And there are people that push life back into you that speak life into you. And David, you're definitely the latter. And even the video that you sent me the day my book launch. And we haven't even been friends for as long as other friends I've out my whole life. You are one of the only people that sent me a video message on my book launch day.

encouraging me, remind me, it's okay. It's going to work out. You're going to be fine. You know, I'm with you. Like, you're going to do great, Heather. And it's just, you're a really, just a special person. And I'm so excited to have you on so that everybody gets a chance to get that energy from you today. Heather, my love language is words of affirmation. So please keep forward to. But isn't it cool to see how that works? Like, I mean, like-minded people who want to help others. We become friends. I mean, you've introduced me to so many people. I've introduced you to so many people. I've introduced you just some friends. It's just a ton of fun just growing together like that. Like, you're one of my best friends that I've never met in person, which is weird, right? Like when we got on this Zoom,

I'm thinking like, I've actually never met Heather in person. How crazy is that? We've got to change that. Yeah, that's so unique to this time that we're living in. But yeah, I agree. It's so weird. But I want to say one of the things that separates you not only from being a good person, from being faith-driven, from doing the right thing, you know, from being high energy and like-minded, You also are one of the unique people and guys, listen to this. This makes a difference. He's always asking what can I do more than I would say. I only know one other person in my life that's like you to this level where,

well, actually, you introduce me to Jordan. Jordan's the same way. I mean, just always showing up like, hey, how can I help? How can I help? Heather, who can I introduce you to? And the more we give to others, the more we show up and give, the more others want to show up and give to us. And you just remind me about that lesson every time we have any type of discussion.

I mean, at the end of the day, like, we all have these gifts that we're given, but what are we given them for for only for ourselves to be able to use? For only for ourselves to look at Instagram and see, oh, we have a million followers. Oh, we got this mini-likes. Oh, this, like, it's never brings you contentment. But if you can see, like, I literally love seeing when my friends or the NBA players I work with have success. Like, just knowing that, like, I mean, selfishly deep down, like, oh, I helped them get there a little bit. But I love seeing my friends like you have success with the book or this top 50 speakers, keynote speakers in the world that we both got named to, which by the way, you're 34 and I'm 44,

which we are very competitive too, but competitive in a very, very fun way. So, yeah, I reciprocate all you're saying. Like, it's fun to see others succeed. And the funny thing is, too, when you pour into others and just continue to pour into others and you're not really concerned what you get back, it always comes back to you in the end, like tenfold. Okay, so thank you for bringing that up. And this is, again, behind the scenes, real story, guys. I had just found out that I didn't make the Wall Street Journal bestseller list for the week that I had planned for everyone who's listening. David, you know, all the supply

chain issues changing my launch date, whatever. My books got split between two weeks. I was being a cry baby and feeling bad for myself, right? You know, all the things I preached to people, I was not practicing. And I was sitting there saying, this sucks. And I don't know why this had to happen. And this was my one shot. And then, you know, I thought, okay, dial it down, sister. What could I do right now to change how I feel? And I thought, do something for someone else because anytime we're feeling bad, if we reach out to help somebody, you know, a good person, we're going to feel better.

And I thought, okay, who could I reach out and help right now? And I thought, oh my gosh, David's new book breakthroughs coming out. I haven't had him on my podcast yet to talk about it. typed you an email. Hey, David, whatever I said, you know, I need to get you on the show right away. Your book's coming out. I want to support you any way I can. That was literally, I was just trying to make myself feel better by helping someone I care about.

You respond to me in the freaking email, which I had no idea. Heather, holy cow, can you believe this with a link? And I thought, what is that? And it said top 50 keynote speaker. And I thought, oh, David made a list. That's awesome. And I click on the list. This was literally like the night it came out.

I click on the list. And I'm reading. I'm reading. And I see your mug. And I'm like, oh, my God, so amazing. But of course, I'm curious. who else is on the list. I swear, guys, I did not think I was on the list. I had it crossed my mind. And I keep scrolling, keeps scrolling. And then I about fell over when I looked at the rest of that

list. And then, guys, true story yet again, David then connected me to the head of the event that's, you know, doing this whole show around the list and gave me an opportunity to speak at it. So here I was, I was trying to make myself feel better selfishly because I was in this bad, poor me mood. So I reach out to try to help support a friend. And, turn, he gives me this amazing news and then gives me this other opportunity, doing the right thing, helping others out is always the flippant answer. So thank you. I feel like if you ever you're in it down, Heather, just hit me up. I got something for you. I'll send you on. But hey, what I want everybody else out there to know, too, is like me and Heather, we're very competitive.

We were talking about this. We were talking about this before we hopped on. And we're talking about like how people shy away from competition. A lot of people want to be like, yeah, no, it's not. No, don't compete, don't compete. No, you should absolutely compete. And I'm not saying me and Heather do it in a joking fun way of like, oh, we're coming for you, coming for. But it is real. We do want to, we do want to be number one. But, but we would rather compete with each other to help each other succeed than we are trying to be like, oh, Heather, I'm going to tear you down from this spot. So that's, I think that's a big misconception people have with competition. Competition is awesome. That's what drives us. That's what fuels us. But don't necessarily commit.

compete like who gets the most likes or who's the most famous. It's more of how can we both grow and rise together? Because if we're doing this by ourselves, I'll tell you one thing. I would never, ever, ever have a chance to be where I'm at today without the people around me. And I know it sounds cliche to say, but John Gordon, he's the one that got me the three book deal. I mean, Ed Milette bringing me on his podcast when I was literally just coming out and transition from the NBA and he brought me on. Like crazy, crazy.

But it's just the power of relationship. And it's a power of true genuine relationships. So if you're out there listening and you're like, man, I want to connect and I have a have a great network. First of all, throw that term networking away. Networking is a dirty term. You never want to use somebody for what it can get for you. But if you have something that you can give, and I think we all have something we can give, even if it's just encouragement, even if it's just checking in, even if it's just being a friend, if you give it to somebody else, like they're going to want to give it back to you. And it's going to separate you from everybody else too. Because people don't think that way. And if you can make that shift and think that way, trust me, you will be way ahead of the competition. And you'll be kicking me and Heather's butt. If your anxiety, depression, or ADHD are more than a rough patch,

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Northwesternigestageragent.com slash confidence-free. Not really because we're way too content. But I love that you just brought that up and I'm going to show you, I'll show everybody this. I got this note, smile, Heather, happy Monday. Alex, your Instacart shopper. And I understand that's small. Like it's not a big deal.

but I unexpectedly found this in my grocery bag that Instacart dropped off. And it choked me up. I thought, what a meaningful, special person that wants me to smile. How could I not smile? And then, P.S., how could I not go give him a five-star review? And he didn't ask me for it, right? Like, I was running over to say, how can I support this guy back? Because he's got such a good vibe and such a nice person.

Just doing that one small, thoughtful thing today when you get off the podcast, reach out to that one person, shoot a note. How are you doing? Something so simple. hey, I'm here to support you. It makes a huge difference. And you're right, that's how you build meaningful relationships and get away from that old, antiquated idea of networking.

Yeah, but one of the most, I love that with the Instacart. That's awesome. One of the most powerful things that I've done is implemented what I call the big three. And that every morning I either send a text message or video message or an audio message, somebody I haven't talked to for a while. Maybe I haven't talked to them for a year, but just checking in on them, me like, hey, you know, just thinking of you this morning. I wanted to know how you're doing.

I'm sure you're up to great things. If I can help you in any way, just let me know. And the responses I've got from that have sometimes been like life changing. People just are at such depths because we don't know what everybody else is going through. I've had multiple times where people have told me like, man, I was just close to end. And I'm like, whoa. Like, we have that power to just reach out to somebody and literally change the trajectory of our lives with encouragement. And when I say that word encouragement, too, like people are thinking, okay, that's, that's rah,

that's, you know, whatever, all this kind of woo-woo encouragement. Actually, if you break this word down, and I've done a lot of breaking this word down, encouragement, start with the EN. That's on the inside. So it starts with the inside of you, who you are on the inside, understanding your true self-awareness, not anything that anybody else is going to say about you is going to affect you. You have who you are.

That courage, if you could say one term that sums up what, everybody's looking for, it's courage. It's taking the risk. It's taking the step in these gifts you've been given, not worrying about failing, not worrying about what other people say. It's about being this Brené Brown vulnerability. Courage is right there in the middle of the word. So encouragement's very powerful inside the courage to do what you've been gifted to do because we're all going to, for the most part, block ourselves off from our gifts. And breaking this down even more, like, let's take this example. Let's say you love playing the piano. And that's your gift. And I buy you this awesome, massive grand piano, beautiful for Christmas, but you put it over in the corner

and put a tarp on it and don't even play it. Like wouldn't that be you slapping me in the face, right? Because I gave you the gift. If God gives you this gift, which he gives all of us a gift, if we block it because we're afraid of what others think, that's slapping him in the face. Courage is taking that step when you don't see where it's going to go, where you don't see where you're going to land. So we have in on the inside, courage, our courage, taking that step. M-E-N-T is a play on mint, which also means money, success, and it's in your own terms. So if you know who you are on the inside and you're willing to take this courageous step, you're going to find your success.

That formula is right there in the word encouragement. And we all, we all can do that. That's the first time I've said that on a podcast, by the way. I'm taking that to the TED stage, just so you guys know. Oh, my gosh, you totally should. and I will so help you. That is a stressful, stressful 10 or 18 minutes, whatever you get. So I'm here for you in my phone.

All right. So listen, in breakthrough, you talk about purpose. And when you were just explaining encouragement, I was thinking, a lot of people don't know. What is my purpose? How do I know how to find that? What advice do you give them? Yeah. Great question.

So purpose, people will think like, oh, what's my why? And Simon Senex really mastered that start with why. And I say start with who. So to find your why, you can't just, you can't just, you don't just land there. And that's what the breakthrough formula is about. It's a four-piece formula. At the end of the day, like, everybody wants a breakthrough. If we could have a breakthrough, we would say we want it.

But breakthroughs are very abstract. You don't really know what the word means. It's kind of like, oh, okay, this happy little accident that happened. And sure, it'd be awesome if it happens again. But there is a formula for it. And through years and working with these NBA players and NBA coaches and all these type of people that are high performance at a high level, I've put together this formula that if you live in it, if you hit these points daily, which are seamless, easy points to add into your daily lifestyle,

your daily rhythm. It's not like, hey, my morning routine last till 2 a, 2 p.m. and then I have to start my evening routine. Nothing crazy like that. But the four points of the first part is confidence. And confidence, which you know very well, is the who, who are you, just kind of like we talked about. confidence has nothing to do with the results. It has nothing to do with your resume, your stats. Like that's just a little tip of the iceberg of what confidence, but the rest, the foundation underneath is your self-awareness of understanding what you stand for outside of what's on your business card, understanding that, hey, you have something that is what you do, but it's not who you are, like NBA players. Like when Jeremy Lynn, one of my best friends and players I've

worked with went through this time called Lynn Sanity in 2011, 2012, he was. on top of the entire world. The number one trending thing literally came out of complete obscurity. It was going for game winners, 30 points a game, like just killing it, trending all over. And if he was being honest, he would say he would never want to go through that time again, because instead of living in this appreciation for the moment and appreciation for what was happening, he was living in the what ifs, what if I can't keep this up? What will people think of me? What if I don't keep this pace up? And one of the biggest breakthroughs he's had in his career and that I've been able to see

is helping him come into his own for understanding what he stands for outside of basketball, that he stands for his faith in Jesus, is Taiwanese people. And he thinks he's a great gourmet chef in the kitchen, too, what he stands for.

That's debatable, highly debatable. But the point being is he doesn't stand for Jeremy Lynn basketball player. And that's the same for all of us. We're told we are something, but understanding your self-awareness, the core of who you are is where the foundation starts.

So once you have your who, then you have to do with the where, the people around you. This is the cooperation piece. So you have confidence plus cooperation. Now this is building your team. And building your team, we all have different strengths. We're often told that you have to improve your weaknesses. But weaknesses are just a compliment's wish list. We all have different strengths for a reason that you put together with other strengths to make this ultimate team. So if you think about it, the best teams, the best cultures are not a bunch of the same strengths. The Chicago Bulls, 1998. Michael Jordan, best score,

Scotty Pippin, the best wingman sidekick, Steve Kerr the best shooter, Dennis Rodman, the best crazy man. You don't know what color Harry is going to show up with or what he's going to do on the court that night. Like these different what I call misfits come together to make this ultimate team. So think about that. Who are the people in your life that you want to surround yourself with?

They shouldn't be just what you do. They should be other people that are doing great things, that are positive people like we talked about, not the energy vampire suckers, that can build this ultimate team. And that's the cooperation. So figuring out where your team is. We have our who confidence, add it with the where, the team.

Now the question becomes, what the heck are you doing? Because if you're doing everything you're doing for a bank account, for looking at yourself down the road and, man, thinking you made a ton of money and that's where you're going to find your contentment, I'll tell you this. Nobody in the history of ever has said they had a. content life just because they made a lot of money or rich and famous. Nobody ever. But if you are doing what you do for others and you're going into the service mode, so the what is the true genuine service mode? And when I say service, no way, you're thinking like, yeah, you go serve,

go down to local food bank and that's all good and all. Definitely keep doing that. But true service is about giving your time and your energy when it's not convenient for you, when it doesn't align with your Google calendar schedule, when you have so much to go, and somebody at the post office that you run into might need you for 15 minutes. Do you just walk on by? I mean, I struggle with this big time, Heather. Like, I've got a schedule. You've got a schedule. We're very type A. We're go, go, go, go, go. If someone gets in the way of it, like, do we take that time? Like, they might need that. They might need just pouring into them. That is what true, genuine services, is what, not what you get out of it, like we touched on earlier, the pour and pouring into others. And it all comes,

back to you in the end. So you have the who, confidence, the where, cooperation. What? What are you doing? That's serving. In any of your gifts that you have, you're serving. And then finally, that brings you to the why. And the why is purpose. And it's not always the what you're doing, like necessarily of me being a speaker, you being a speaker, an author, but it's who you're doing it for. So if you find yourself in a situation right now that you don't necessarily like, that's okay. Pour into that with all that you have, eventually it's going to lead you to where you want to go, where you want to be, but you first have to pour into that. And to me, the most attractive thing is when we have this amazing gift we're given.

Like we're giving that example earlier. You have a burning passion inside it. You have a passion to do something. You have this gift. And when you go all in for it, like there's this guy out in the deep hills of Northern Ireland. Like he is the guy for cashmere sweaters. All he's doing is he's sitting there just. just doing this wool.

Like, he's the guy for Kashmir. Or over in Japan, I actually have a chapter about this in my book when I hunted down Giro, the sushi guy, the best sushi maker in the world. The Giro dreams a sushi documentary, if you've seen that. He is the man for the best sushi, but they're obsessed. And that's the key term. Obsessed. Now, most people think, oh, that's a bad term.

That, ooh, don't be obsessed. No way. No, no, don't be balanced. Balance is BS. The 80-20? Like, that's just an excuse to fill your time with things that don't even matter to you. Like, I don't want to be 80, 20 loving my wife. I don't want to be 80, 20 on the mission that I'm on.

I want to be obsessed. Obsessed doesn't mean you're busy, overly busy. It just means you choose what's the most important to you. And that's where your purpose is. When you're obsessed with the passion that you have, then you're on mission. So just to recap there for the formula, so you guys all know it, confidence, your self-awareness, who you are, it's where it all starts. Who are the people around you, the team?

you're aware. That's your cooperation with those around you, using your strengths. The what is the service living in this service mode? And then finally the purpose, this is your why. This is your obsession. And if you do this with what I call relentless consistency, this is the day after day after day, your breakthroughs will come. But I don't know when they'll come. Like I can't tell you exactly when they come, but I'll tell you they will come if you continue to live in this mode. But if you don't, they won't come. So that's your choice. That's the superhero power we all have is choice. Do you want to live in this breakthrough mode to create breakthroughs and make them regular occurrences? Or do you want to just continue just going on like you are having a few happy accidents here and there?

And that's the separate. That is the breakthrough formula in a nutshell. Starting the year with a wardrobe refresh, Quince has you covered with lux essentials that feel effortless and look polished. They're perfect for layering, mixing, and building a wardrobe that, last. Their versatile styles make it easy to reach for them day after day. Quince has all the staples covered from soft Mongolian cashmere sweaters that feel like designer pieces without the markup to 100% silk tops and skirts for easy dressing up to perfectly cut denim for everyday wear. Their wardrobe essentials are crafted to last season after season. Their Italian wool coats are real standouts. They're beautifully tailored, soft to the touch and built to carry you through

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with quince. Don't wait. Go to quince.com slash confidence for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too. That's Q-U-I-N-C-E.com slash confidence to get free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince.com slash confidence. What's the best breakthrough story that you can share with us? For me personally, for somebody that I've worked with. Either one. Okay. So let's talk about this. Since we're both speakers, this will be a good one. So this is how I got into speaking. It's crazy. So I decided I wanted to become a speaker. I wanted to do keynote talks. I wanted to get on stage. And I don't really know how to do it.

I don't really know who to get in touch with about this. But I had a friend who worked at Nestle, Australia, right? Nestle, Australia. So I hit him up. I'm like, hey, could you introduce me to who lines up the talks for you guys? And he's like, sure, yeah, I'll try to find him. I don't know, but I'll try to find him. He gives me this email of someone in America, Nestle.

So I shoot them an email asking them the same thing. And they're like, yeah, I'll try to find it. I mean, there's like a month goes by. And finally I get an email back. I wasn't expecting anything. And they're like, hey, yes, this is the problem. person that you want to talk to about potentially being a speaker for us. So I email him as well. So it's like the third chain down there. He's like, okay, let's jump on a call. So I'm talking to

him and we're having a good conversation and everything. I'm basically, you know, acting like I've been there before talking about what I talked about. He's like, okay, great, send me over your speaking reel. I didn't have a speaker. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, I didn't give me a talk. So my wife's an actor. So we got her acting coach. We rented out this little like church place that looks cool that we can have a stage and we brought in five friends. So it was great with the camera. So it made it look like there's a packed audience. I brought in different outfits that I'd change into and I give talks and some poses, like just basically like one liner. So it looked like I gave five different talks, put it together in a reel. So I had like basically a five talk real,

sent it over to Nestle, got on another call with him. So it's like the fourth one down the road. And he's asking me all these questions, like what I speak about, the people that I've spoke to before. And once again, I'm just like, you know what? I'm just going to keep, I'm just going to go with it. At the end of it, it's like, okay, let's do it. What's your speaking fee? I was speaking fee. And I said this number that was very high and he agreed to it.

I was like, oh my gosh, I should have said higher. But that's, so I locked down this talk, okay? And this is literally crazy enough, like right before the end of the world, or the end of the world, the pandemic shuts down. The pandemic shuts down the world and the, in the real in-person talks. And I hadn't given this talk. I didn't even know what I was going to write about, anything like that.

And one of my friends said, hey, if you just get up there and you practice it a few times, you're going to fail. You're going to flop. It happened to me is what this guy said. So I ended up giving this talk 162 times. I tallied every time that it did it, 162 times to either my wife, her acting coach, anybody that would listen to me give this talk. And I got up there.

So I got up there on States for Nestle. Now, I was nervous. is heck getting up there. But I just said, a friend had told me as well, I was like, hey, you're going to be nervous. Just say nerves, bring it on, take me to higher heights. And so that's what I said, stepped on stage. And I kid you not, like I looked down at the clock and it felt like five minutes and gone by and had five minutes left in the talk. I just been flowing for 55 minutes, wrapped up with two seconds to go, perfect timing on it all. Like, they loved it. It was awesome. I got great video content from there and just blew up

everything else in speaking. Crazy, right? That's a, that's a massive breakthrough. But the breakthrough point being like, hey, if you want something, there's always a way. There's, I mean, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, and there's, and when you don't hear the answer you want, you can give up. No is not necessarily no. No, no just means next. Somebody knows. Like, that's what I'll do. A majority of my talks that I get are just me getting to myself. And it's basically asking a friend who works at a company, yo, you know who books up your talks? Maybe they know somebody. It's just like breakthroughs occur if you make them happen. That's what I like to say, the choices that we make

determine the breakthroughs that we create. I love that story, David, because you and I both knows, people will call me all the time and say, hey, can you connect me to your speaker agent? I want to get into speaking. And I'm going to send them that clip. It's not connecting to a speaker agent. That's not how you're going to get your speaker gig. It's what you just said. asking for help relentlessly trying to find another avenue, following up, creating solutions where there are roadblocks, getting creative to create solutions, especially when you don't have a speaker reel, or in my case, when I didn't have a book proposal, and the agent said, go away until you have one, right? You have to find ways over those hurdles. The thing is, you can give up. You won't have that

breakthrough, or you can keep trying to find a way over and around, which you were relentless in the pursuit of. And just so everybody knows listening, that's super scary. first keynote ever, something big like that, you put the hours in, you put the work in, and that will always be the difference maker. Oh, I can't, I can't harp on that enough. The preparation that you do when nobody's watching is everything. Like, you see good speakers get up on stage and it looks like they're just making it look easy. That's because they've prepared their butt off. Like, you get on stage to make, you make it look easy because it's been so difficult in the preparation of it. I'm glad you hit that point. But it is crazy. It's,

too. I was talking to someone about this. It's like the world we live in today, you can basically create what you want to become and you can do it. But the only way to do it is being authentic about it. Like how many people do you hear out there is like, oh, I'm a life coach or anytime I get a LinkedIn message, I click out of it basically because everybody is a life coach or they have they're an entrepreneur. Like if you're calling yourself an entrepreneur and a life coach, you're not. So really, if you have a burning passion of something that you want to do that will help others, don't do it the way everybody else is doing. Think of a different way.

There's too many people saying the same thing. I like to say that we are all a smoothie and we are parts of the people that are around. Like, I'm a part of you, you're part of me, we're part of John Gordon, whoever we surround ourselves with. And we get things from them, we learn things from them. We throw it all there in a smoothie and then we blend it up and put our own little spicy. and granola and all that could cat, like our own little flavor on top. So nothing essentially is original, but you can be an authentic original to yourself. And that's the way you're going to stand out.

Like it's just the way it is. Like even that shows Squid Games that was out, not too long ago, why it blew up? People ask them why it blew? Because it's different. People seen everything else. This is a different concept. It's something different. Be different, literally.

And you will stand. out. I couldn't agree more when I decided to reposition myself as the person who got fired, bouncing back from corporate America, right? Rejection is not rejection. It's redirection. I started diving into the story of I've just been fired and I'm putting it, I'm leveraging it to work for me. No one was doing that. And it's so funny to this day, people, I was owning a white space. No one was trying to compete. Now, I didn't go into the space of a former corporate executive, of now life coaching, right? Because that space, there's a lot of people swimming around there. It's, you know, there's sharks in that water. I thought, where is a space I can go that no one is

that no one wants to own? Is it risky? Yes, it's risky. If it doesn't work out, I'm back at ground zero. And then I can reposition and try. But the other thing is, on top of owning that unique value proposition, being different, being unique, you've got to be consistent, right? Because you go jump in and do one post or have one meeting or do one keynote and think that overnight you're going to be the next, you know, Tony Robbins. Guess what? Zero chance that's going to happen. And maybe Squid Games, there's a whole backstory to getting to the point where they actually have that series that we don't know about. And I bet that's probably the case is about showing up consistently, trying different things, test and try. Data doesn't lie. You'll get the feedback. But don't back off.

And I love Gary Vaynerchuk for, he's always sharing those videos of him on YouTube back when he was in his late 20s and early 30s. You know, 20 years ago, the guy is not an overnight success. He was grinding before anyone else knew what YouTube was. Be consistent, be unique and don't give up. Now, tell me, why should everyone go pick up breakthrough? What's it going to do for them? First off, Squid Games did take 10 years for Netflix even to bring it in. There you go.

Netflix for 10 years. And it's the number one grossing show all time on Netflix. Yeah. There is exactly. Mike drop. Mike drop moment. You have to be consistent. You've got to keep going.

Yes. Yes. If you like anything that we talked about today or you find any value from this, pick up the book. There's so much more in there. But really it is a, it helps you create your own roadmap, your own guide, your own plan for creating your blueprint. I share it through stories of myself and people that I've worked with

and what I've seen. But there's action steps at the end of each chapter to help you put together. What can a breakthrough formula look for you in your life? And it's not the same for everybody. But it is the same in being consistent. And it is the same in being courageous like we have talked about. So, yeah, it's everywhere. Amazon, Barnes & Noble's, all that good stuff.

Anywhere books are sold, David Nurse.com. I do a breakthrough coaching group, which Heather was a guest speaker on that blue it away. Thank you so much. That's a special group. You can hit me more about that. Social media, David Nurse, NBA, or come out to the best coast, California, skip Florida. Come out on head. All right. If you want to help David, I like to enlighten people because sometimes people just don't know. Post about him. Post about the book. Write a review of his book. Share it with someone that you think could benefit from it. Buy someone in the book for the holidays. There's so many ways you can support authors. Or if you know a company that's looking for speakers, give them David's name.

There's so much you can do. Keep spreading the good word, my friend. And thank you so much for being here. Neither, you're amazing. Thanks for having me on again. Seriously. Thank you. And thank you for being the friend and the consistent friend that you are. Appreciate you. All right. Well, remember that when you're hosting the event and it comes time to roast me. Guys, stay tuned for that one. That's going to be interesting. Until next week, keep creating your confidence. You know I will be. Come on this journey with me.