Creating Confidence with Heather Monahan - #21: Using Instagram to Grow Your Business with Natalie Elizabeth Ellis
Episode Date: September 24, 2019Natalie Elizabeth Ellis, founder of BossBabe, comes in to discuss her tips and strategies for growing your audience and making stronger connections via Instagram. Natalie has amassed over 1.6 million ...followers during the timespan of a year and a half and she's here to tell us how to do the same by taking advantage of available data on Instagram. And thank you to our advertisers: NetSuite = Download your free guide at NetSuite.com/Monahan Review this podcast on Apple Podcast using this link and when you DM me the screenshot, I'll buy you my $299 video course as a thank you! My book Confidence Creator is available now ! If you are looking for more tips you can download my free E-book at my website and thank you! DM your questions for the show DM your questions for the show Instagram | Facebook | Twitter | LinkedIn See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
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Thank you for listening to this Podcast One production.
Available on Apple Podcasts and Podcast One.
When you join me here, Podcast One, you're going to chase down our goals.
We'll overcome adversity and set you up for a better tomorrow.
After no, see, I'm on this journey with me.
So grateful you're here with me.
Okay, so you know I just got back from L.A.
I am exhausted, but had a really good trip.
As always, showing up is everything.
That's how you create relationships.
That's how you make things happen.
So I'm so glad I went, although it is a little tiring.
I cannot tell a lie.
Okay, so this morning I love Facebook.
Well, I don't really like Facebook, but I love Facebook for this one reason.
These memories that show up, it is shocking the perspective it gives you.
So this morning I turned my phone.
and I saw this memory that showed up from seven years ago.
This is crazy.
So seven years ago today, I had taken the biggest stage of my life.
I'll never forget.
I was so flipping nervous.
My feet were sweating.
I thought I was going to fall over.
And a really weird thing happened.
I think there was probably a couple thousand people there.
It was the National Association of Broadcasters.
event and I was giving away an award and it turned out unbeknownst to me the the company that
was winning the award was Clear Channel at the time.
They were boycotting the event or people thought they were boycotting the event.
I don't remember the particulars.
It's a while ago but they didn't show up and so I called out the winner.
You know, I said whatever it was I said and then I announced the winner and people started
booing and I'll tell you what a weird situation.
when you're standing on a stage and all of a sudden everyone's booing and you're the only one standing there.
That was kind of crazy.
So I ended up, I just started dancing to the music because I think it was some hip hop rapper playing, of course, because that's, you know, I am thug life.
And it ended up that, you know, people started laughing.
And then I said something like, listen, let's cut these guys some slack.
You know, there are so many issues with the airlines.
And if you're not having issues with airlines, you're not flying enough.
I don't know.
I made some joke and it worked out well and I got off the stage.
But what's funny today is that looking back and I was reminded of this, I got a DM the other day from a woman saying,
it's so unfair that people like Rachel Hollis explode overnight.
I need to break into speaking.
And this post just gave me that perspective.
I tell people all the time, I spoke for the last 20 years in corporate America.
I took thousands of stages just because back then, you know, my social.
social media wasn't big and I wasn't sharing all of this stuff.
Didn't mean it didn't happen.
And it was just a good reminder for me today that, you know, this, what I do today is so many years in the making.
None of this has happened overnight.
Mind you, I still haven't hit my Rachel Hollis moment yet either, but it's coming.
I know it is.
And I'm just going to keep working.
It's the grind.
It's, you know, that day to day showing up.
And I actually, I want to share something really exciting.
I pray this is exciting.
But I had mentioned to you that when I was in Boston a couple weeks back, speaking at hypergrowth, I had the opportunity to go into APB speakers and meet with all of the agents.
Now, at that point in time, I was already represented by the Harry Walker Speaker Agency, GDA speakers, and Big Speak.
There's somebody else I'm forgetting, but I'm not sure who it was.
And now I was there to, you know, add myself to the APB team.
However, what was interesting was this was the first time that I got a face-to-face opportunity
to pitch myself to agents live.
I had done it on the phone, but never face-to-face.
And as I'm always preaching, you've got to go face-to-face if you want to get something done.
So in that meeting, I'll never forget.
They kind of said, hey, you know, just tell us about you.
And I just went into my whole pitch.
And then at one point, someone said, you know, your bio is not that good.
on your speaker kit, but the bio on your website is much better.
And she was holding a piece of paper.
And I said, hand that to me.
And I took it and I crumpled it up and I threw it on the floor and I stood up while I was
doing it.
And I said, done, problem solved.
What do we move on to next?
And everyone started laughing.
And, you know, it just reminded me that until you get face to face with people and
they see your energy and personality, you know, I have the sickest reviews of my work and
of my speaking and they'd seen it.
But until they met me and saw me and felt my energy, they, you know, they were going to
add me to their speaker lineup, which they did.
But it was that moment where the head of the team said, Heather, we want to sign you
exclusive.
We want you to be just with APB.
Now, you know, we talked through why someone would do that because I didn't understand.
I am a rookie in as far as being a professional speaker.
This has all just been the past year that I've been working on this, even though I spoke.
for the past 20 years that that was not my job I didn't even know people got paid for speaking okay so
stay open-minded to the fact that I'm a rookie in the business side of this so I asked some good
questions I asked why would people want to sign and why would people not want to sign because I'd like
to hear both sides of that you know I was trying to have some understanding now my expertise
and track record and career has been in sales so one thing that I know is you must close when you're
face to face. So in my mind, while I was asking these good questions, I also knew, Heather,
if you do want to, you know, go exclusive with someone, don't you dare leave here today without the
commitment because it's so much harder to, you know, work something out over email or the phone.
So I stayed in that meeting, continued that conversation, stayed there so much longer than I
should have because I had to get back to hypergrowth to speak. However, you know, I really wanted
to learn everything I could from this team. And I will say this. These people are like,
salt of the earth. They're from Boston where I'm from. I just really felt at home there and I felt
good, you know, that they got me, understood me and that they cared. And to me, that's, you know,
that's everything you need to work with people that you can trust and that you feel safe with,
that, you know, you feel like they have your back. And I genuinely got that sense. So to make a
long story longer, you know, I asked a lot of good questions. They gave me some great answers as to why.
And what I learned in that moment was I had been with all these other speaker agencies over the past year and none of them were pitching me.
I am the only one that ever pitches me.
So I'm doing all the work.
I'm out there pitching all the companies.
I'm out there promoting myself.
I'm out there securing deals, negotiating deals.
I have to chase down the money.
I have to do all the discovery calls.
You know, it's a lot of work for one person.
What they explained to me in that moment was that when you're with a lot of speaker bureaus, a lot of speaker agencies,
that's great because you have that exposure, that credibility, you know, and your face is next to Bill Clinton's on these websites.
So it really separates you from other speakers out there.
However, unless you sign exclusive with someone, there's no incentive for them to pitch you because they know that if they pitch you, and let's say I didn't sign with APB, and if APB pitched me, someone could have just gone to another speaker agency to see if they could get me cheaper or, you know, there's always.
this backdoor opportunity that, you know, you're not going to get the deal done. So they taught
me that speaking agency speaker bureaus only pitch and promote their exclusive clients. And that made
a lot of sense to me. And then they also explained to me that they could still be that go
between for the other agencies so I could still appear on their sites, but they would be the one
brokering the deals and that, you know, APB would handle all that. Frankly, that's a blessing to me.
I don't want to handle the brokering. I don't want to handle the negotiations. I don't want to
handle the negotiation. I don't want to be that person because, you know, time is everything to me.
And when you're working for yourself, any way that you can be more efficient and more productive
is everything. So being able to peel that off and hand that to them was a gift. And anyway, so I left
there and crickets, I didn't hear back for them. We secured the deal. We all agreed at the table
that I would go exclusive with them. They promoted it and announced it on their Twitter feed.
And then crickets, nothing. I hate crickets.
Rickets drive me crazy. However, I knew I felt really good about what I did there that day. I felt so
proud of what I did at hypergrowth. I knew one of their agents was working with the team at hypergrowth
so that they would hear the feedback that I did really well. So I just kind of said, hey, I'm going to
stand in my power right now. I'm not going to, you know, chase them down. I'm going to move forward.
And I just kept building my pipeline and putting myself out there. And I secured two more deals
locally here in Miami to speak over the next eight weeks.
And I've just been working on my side of the business and letting go of that.
It has not been easy.
Okay, I've been so annoyed about it.
All of a sudden, when you know yesterday, I get an email,
Hey, Heather, we're back from vacation.
I didn't know they were on vacation.
And we need to secure the paperwork, get this stuff signed,
and get you up and going as an exclusive with us.
So let's get pitching you.
We need to get your contract back.
That was it.
And so I signed the contract,
send it back to them and now praying that we're going to be off and running and these guys are
going to be pitching me. So I learned so much. Here I was thinking that I had partnered with all these
bureaus and that I would be getting business from them and I wasn't getting anything. And now I was
learning why it was I wasn't getting anything. So it's kind of eye-opening, you know, what you don't
know sometimes can be the thing that's holding you back. But it's about taking action, showing up,
meeting new people, asking questions that helps you put those pieces back together. So, yes,
I am a rookie in the business side of speaking. No, I'm not a rookie when it comes to speaking,
but I am starting to learn this business. I'm grateful to be working with good people who are
willing to teach me and explain to me. And I'm really, oh my gosh, I'm so hopeful that this was
a great move. I will let you know I signed a year deal. So I will let you know I'm hopeful it's
going to work out great and that they're going to get me booked all over this country. I'm
actually speaking this week, I'm speaking Thursday in Miami if you're in Miami or if you want to
come to Miami. Bacardi Leadership Summit is at the Lowe's Hotel. There are still tickets available and I
am speaking there. So I hope to catch you there. Now, another crazy thing that happened was I turned
on Instagram this morning and the picture a year ago today on Instagram was me at my hotel in L.A.
getting ready to go to meet the Steve Harvey executive producer.
The reason I want to tell you this is, so it's September, right?
And I went on that pitch a year ago today.
I had crickets until January 3rd.
I did not hear anything back from them.
I ended up sending them a life-size cut out of myself.
I ended up sending them overnighting them books that I had signed.
My meeting went amazing a year ago today.
They were like, oh, we love you.
We definitely want to have you on the show.
and crickets. Now, I ended up hearing back for them January 3rd. So it just goes to show you never
know what's coming. You know, sometimes you just have to keep moving forward and, and working on
things and not get caught up in the negativity of, oh, I thought I had this because you actually
might have it. You just don't know yet. Now, come to find out, what I didn't know is that,
you know, Steve was losing his show and they were picking up Kelly Clarks. And there were so many
things going on internally there. People weren't thinking about me or any other guests. They
were thinking about their own job preservation, I'm sure. So there was a lot going on internally there,
had nothing to do with me. I ended up getting the call January 3rd. I went on the show. I believe
it was the second or third week of January this year. So, you know, it took months for that to pan out
and happen, but it did happen, kind of like this thing with APB. I was wondering where they went.
They were on vacation. And now they're back and now we're up and running. So, you know,
Keep moving forward. Keep taking action and try not to get down because sometimes we just don't have the whole picture or all the information and it all works out in the end.
So today, oh my gosh, I'm super excited for you to meet my guest who I just interviewed in L.A. I loved her.
I don't love all my guests, I'll tell you that. But I really love Natalie. She's real. She's super smart.
and it's just frustrating that she's 20 years younger than me, but I'm really proud of all that she's accomplished.
This woman has figured out how to hack Instagram, and this is another great example.
You know, I really got aggressive on social media, launched my personal brand three years ago,
and when that happened, Instagram's algorithm wasn't the same that it is now.
It was much easier to scale your audience three years ago.
So if you didn't, you know, launch your Instagram three years ago, the next best time to
do it is today. Just get going. And P.S. LinkedIn is today, what Instagram was three years ago. If you
want to grow fast, go to LinkedIn. But as far as Instagram goes, I had no idea there was a hack that you could
use to grow your Instagram today. I didn't, I really wouldn't have believed that if someone told me
until I met Natalie. When you see what this woman has built in a year and a half, she has over 1.6 million
followers. She gains 28,000 followers a week. Are you guys?
kidding me. It just goes to show that just because you don't know it's possible or that it's figured
out, it doesn't mean that it isn't. Somebody else might have that key. We just need to connect to that
person. So today I'm connecting you to that person. She's going to show you how you can blow up your
Instagram. She's also going to show you a bunch of other hacks that she's implemented for her life.
I'm just, I'm so proud of this young lady. I'm so proud of her business. And she's just the kind of
people you want to hang from and learn from. So as always, we're ready to level up with my next
guest. But before we do, if you don't know your numbers, you don't know your business. But the
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Hi.
and welcome back to creating confidence.
I'm so excited for you to meet my fab guest, Natalie Ellis, Boss Babe, co-founder and CEO.
She is a major CEO.
At just 27 years old, Natalie is the creator and strategist behind Boss Babe, one of the fastest-growing online communities of ambitious women,
with a global online community of over 1.7 million women, and we had to update that number because
is things growing so rapidly.
Its mission is to inspire and support women
to turn their dreams into a reality
through building successful businesses.
Natalie, thanks for being here.
Thank you for having me.
How about that accent?
It's gorgeous.
I can't take it.
Thank you.
I love that I get that in America.
When I'm back home, no one cares less.
And so where is home?
I'm from Newcastle, which is near Scotland.
It's like, for anyone that doesn't know the UK,
it's basically the winterfell of the UK
if you watch Game of Thrones.
Oh, I don't.
Isn't that tragic?
It's kind of tragic.
I'm the only person.
Everybody else listens and watches it.
Okay.
Yeah, Northern England.
So how long have you been here in the States?
About three and a half years now, and I've been in L.A. for just over a year.
But you actually weren't, for the three and a half years you have been here,
you weren't 100% in on Boss Babe and building 1.7 million community and followers.
No, we went kind of all in about a year and a half ago.
Before that, I had a different company.
and was just feeling into what my passion was going to be.
And we had this growing, but we went all in about a year and a half ago, and it's been incredible.
So tell us how this community came to be, this initiative came to be, and knowing that you wanted to go all in happened.
Yeah, I mean, I'm like that cliche entrepreneur.
I, like, had my first business when I was seven.
And I, like, I think I was, like, a born entrepreneur because no one in my family is an entrepreneur.
So I don't know where it came from.
Did they think you were crazy?
Oh, yeah.
I think they still do.
I don't think they even know what I do
But yeah
I was always like this
I always loved this idea of creating something
And having that freedom
But it was only when I was about 13
That I even discovered the word entrepreneurship
And it kind of summed up what I was doing
I was I was at a career day at school
And some lady came in and was talking about having her own business
I was like that's what I want to do
And so I've always just been obsessed with entrepreneurship
And I thought for me that meant having a business
And my first like
real official business was a supplement company. I was manufacturing supplements and had them
in stores all across the UK when I was 22. And what I realized was I actually love the idea of
entrepreneurship and really helping other people get into it than just having multiple different
kinds of businesses. Like entrepreneurship is my passion. And so it took a while to figure out what
that looked like. Because I'm like, is it a job to help other people start businesses? Is it a job
to talk about entrepreneurship? Is anyone else even interested in this thing? Because I think,
I thought it was weird. No one else around me was doing it. And that's how I really got into
Boss Babe and decided to go all in. Our first product was called The Society, which is a membership
for female entrepreneurs. And it was essentially me just creating what I really wish I had back when I
started my first business because it was so lonely and it can be when no one around you really
gets what you're doing. And so that's where it really all started and kind of evolved from there.
And so you really just followed your passion, not what other people were.
are telling you to do or what you should be. Yeah, and there was a lot of having to really push back
on what people were telling me to do. I remember when I was leaving university, I had an amazing
job offer, would have paid off all my student debt. It was like the dream job for the degree that I did
and something inside just didn't feel right. And I asked them, I asked the graduate job, can you just
give me a year to figure this out? And then I'll come back and start the job in a year's time.
And they were like, yeah. And so I made this bet with myself, okay, if I can get any business off the ground,
I don't care what it is, then I will go and do that instead of going to this job.
Because I had bills to pay. I couldn't just take a few years off, but getting a business off the ground often takes longer than you think.
And so it came to that year point. And I was literally just freelancing to make money while trying to get a business off the ground.
And I had to really make a decision to go all in on myself and turn down this job. And everyone thought I was crazy.
And it's been a lot of that, like taking bets on myself and doing things that maybe I haven't seen other people doing.
But it really does pay off. And it sounds.
cliche, but it does. What were you scared? I mean, you make it sound easy to me thinking of having that
dream job or, you know, when I graduate school, I got into sales and it was a good enough job.
I never thought of doing anything else because that's what I was supposed to do or society
told you to do. So what do you attribute that difference making that you were able to just go with
your gut and your idea? I had a really turbulent childhood, which I think.
think made me very resistant to uncertainty. And so even when I was at university, I was traveling,
I would just hop on a plane on my own and go to Asia or I came to America. And I would have just
a couple hundred dollars in my bank account. I'd have no idea what I was going to do. But I think I
built that resiliency in my childhood to just see what happened and put that faith in myself. And
I think when you put faith in yourself and it pays off, you get evidence that you can trust yourself.
and you get evidence in that self-belief.
And I just kept doing it more and more to a point where I really did believe myself and I was
willing to do it.
But I still now, I get scared making decisions and I have these moments of, oh, is it going to
fail?
Like, this is really risky.
But again, if it works out, it's just more evidence in the bank.
And if it doesn't, I feel okay in doing something else.
That's amazing.
I so applaud that you're doing this at such a young age.
It's mind-blowing to me.
It took me turning 43 to figure any of this stuff out.
and you're light years ahead. So congrats. It's really awesome to watch that happen. Thank you.
So when you did go all in on Boss Babe, what were the initial steps that you took? What did
all in look like? So I really wanted to create this product, the society. I wanted a membership
product where women could join with a really low entry point. Like we started it at $29 a month.
And so it was the amount of money that pretty much anyone could invest. And we just pulled.
so much into them to really help them get their business off the ground and that's where we started.
We were like if we can really get some women in here and transform their lives and really show what
we're doing, then we've got something. We've got product market fit and we can scale it.
And so I spent months just doing research into young entrepreneurs and what they need and why
they fail in business. And I tried to tick all the boxes that would suggest if they do these
things, they will succeed. And so we came up with a framework and we helped walk them through the
framework and very quickly we started getting results and so people started talking about it so this
product scaled very very fast and so from there we just really listened to our audience um i'm very
good at instagram and so growing instagram was the thing that i did and so as my audience there grew
i just kept listening what do you want from us what what more can we do to support you what is
stopping you from taking the leap and saying yes to this business and um it really came from there and
we just kept listening and the next product we came out with was a product called IGA,
which is an Insta Growth Accelerator and helps them do what we did on social.
We very much just said this our exact strategy, take it, go use it.
And again, it really worked and we just kept listening.
And so that's really what the business is built on, just building a community of ambitious
women, really supporting them and saying, okay, what's next?
What is it going to take for us to help you get to that next step?
Because success looks so different for everyone.
What I think is successful is probably different to you.
And so the ability to listen and pivot and move fast, I think has served us really well.
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Move fast and break things. I'm all about it.
Yeah.
So you brought up Instagram, which is interesting because to me,
Instagram is a mystery.
I cannot figure it out.
I can't crack the code.
And anytime you figure out one thing, it seems everything changes and you're set back a year or two.
So what can you share some of that recipe for success?
of why you're able to get your Instagram blowing up without posting naked pictures of people,
by the way.
I love that.
Yeah, I mean, my first tip for anyone is try and create viral content because viral content
is going to mean that you are pushed to the top of everyone's feeds because Instagram
is signaling this is a really good piece of content and they want as much engagement as
possible on their platform.
So you're going to be pushed to the top of everyone's feed.
You're going to be on their explore page.
And that means you're going to get seen by people who aren't even following you or
people are going to be tagging their friends in your post.
So again, you're getting seen by people who aren't following you,
but probably should be because if their friends are,
chances are they're your demographic too.
So viral content's definitely the place to start.
And so what I would be doing is making a list of like at least 10 people
who are very, very similar to you in your niche.
So for us, it would be female entrepreneurs or ambitious women.
We would go and look at other pages or influencers who have the same following as us
and scroll through their feed posts.
So say they have 10,000 likes, 10,000 likes, and then you spot a 50,000 likes.
Okay, jackpot this one viral, why?
And we dissect it and we try and understand.
And then we repost it and we test.
And if that goes viral for us, we know, okay, this is similar audience and this recipe works.
I feel like this is cheating.
It's just really figuring out what everyone's going to resonate with.
And then once you know that and you've tested it a few times and you kind of dissect your recipe,
then you can create original content based off of that.
It's amazing.
It seems so simplistic yet I can tell you this.
I never thought to do it.
Yeah.
And I don't think it is because it really takes time to really test and try and see what's actually working.
So that's one tip.
And then just with the new algorithm update,
so Instagram are now testing in different countries.
They're hiding likes and like like numbers,
which is really interesting.
And I think it doesn't really scare me.
And I don't think it scares a lot of influencers because,
is sometimes you can worry about the way that your content's perceived.
Like if you used to get thousands of likes and then you get like a couple of hundred likes,
you're like, wait, does no one like me? What's happened?
And it can stop you from posting content.
And I mean, so like if people aren't posting on social media and they're just consuming,
that's just like a publication.
It's like a blog and that's not what builds a social media company.
So I think Instagram and Facebook are really catching onto this.
And so they're making it really easy for you to post pictures of your dog and not really
care less how many people are going to like it.
And so I think what that tells us as well is the frequency of your posts important.
So the more you're posting and creating all the original content,
then the more you're going to get a favor with Instagram.
So I say a story every single day.
And we post four times a day, which is a lot.
But we're a brand, which I think you get away with.
It's not pictures of me every single day.
It's like lots of different types of content.
But as a personal brand, if you can post like at least once a day, I think it'll really serve you.
Oh my gosh.
That's a lot of work.
It's a lot of work, yeah.
How many people do you have on your team that work on your social?
On the social, probably just two.
Wow.
Yeah, we're a really small team.
There's only 19 in total on the team.
So what are the majority of the people on your team working on?
Totally different things.
We kind of split between marketing and ops.
So we're like very systems focused because we have thousands and thousands of clients.
That's a lot of maintenance in the back end.
So making sure tech doesn't break, making sure we can answer everyone's emails.
At every single point, there is always someone on live chat on the inside.
our membership so if anyone's struggling with anything they can hop on there and ask questions so it's a
big mix of different things and then on top of our instagram we have our facebook our podcast um our blog so
lots of different people working on different things so i'm sure one of the questions that you get from
a lot of your members and a lot of your community is great you're teaching me how to increase my following
and i'm amassing a larger following however at what point can i monetize it and how do i do that
Yeah, I get that question a lot. And I think it really depends on how you monetize. So if you're
monetizing your own product, say you have like physical products or service based products and you're
monetizing, you can be monetizing from less than a thousand followers as long as they are really
targeted and engaged. Or of course, if you're getting sponsorships, then it has to be a higher
number. But it really depends on the buying power of your audience because the company is going to
want to work with someone with, say, 50,000 followers who have very strong buying power than someone
with a million followers whose audience are not trusting them and aren't going to convert.
But if you're just monetizing your own Instagram, it's really about attracting people that are
going to buy from you. And so that really comes down your content strategy. So are you posting
stuff that your absolute ideal client would engage with? Or do you even know who your ideal client is?
Do you know where they hang out? And so that's kind of where it comes back to that viral research.
So really seeing what resonates with them.
building intentionally, I think sometimes on social it can be this whole attraction. I just want to get
thousands and thousands of followers, but actually is that going to serve your business? Because sometimes
in IJ, I'll teach people to, instead of going after 10,000 people, like try and go after a thousand of
your ideal clients, because if a thousand people buy your product, that's a pretty big conversion.
That's a lot. And so really, really thinking through like that. But I would always start with just
getting super clear on who your ideal client is and what content they resonate with. One of the
things I find so hard listening to explain this. I know what my followers love, but sometimes it's hard
to reinvent that every day. So on my feed, people love to hear about what challenge I'm overcoming
or be inspired by some massive thing like me getting fired. You don't get fired every day, right? So how many
times can you go back to that well again? Or how do you reinvent it to make it fresher interesting?
I think what you're telling me is they just love the transparency that you post. And so like thinking about
how you can just incorporate that daily.
So whether you're having like a shitty day, like talk about that and just say like, yeah,
I didn't get fired, but this happened.
I was on a really bad mood.
I had to push past like 10 podcasts and whatever it is.
And I think just like bringing people behind the scenes is a really nice thing because I think
sometimes on social vulnerability can be perceived as, oh, they're just trying to sell me
something again.
But when you're just like really open and transparent and you're like, hey, guys, I'm just
bringing you on this journey with me.
I think people resonate a lot with that.
A couple of years ago, like, people loved scrolling through their feeds and just seeing these, like, Pinterest perfect photos.
And I think people don't like that so much anymore. They want to see realness.
What do you think's going to come next? Because I do agree with you. People loved that picture perfect and put 18 filters on it.
And now everyone's putting no filters on. And those are the posts that are doing well. Where do you think that this evolution will go next?
I think this is going to continue and just really going into video more and more.
Video is obviously huge already, but I think video just helps you connect with a person on such a deeper
level than like an image or something. And so I think that transparency is really going to continue,
but it's going to be a lot more video based. What about your thoughts on LinkedIn?
I think LinkedIn's an amazing platform. And I think there is a lot to be said about LinkedIn.
I don't think enough people are really putting time into growing it. I think it's growing very,
very fast. I would be in. It's unbelievable. To me, it's my easiest platform.
platform to grow and to get viral content. And what's so interesting, and I'd love to hear your
taking this. I can post something on LinkedIn. It'll get a million views. I post the same thing on
Instagram. It gets a thousand views. Why, why does one thing work so well over here? And I assume it's
similar people that are engaging with the content. It's probably completely different demographics.
I think that Instagram audience is definitely a bit younger than LinkedIn. I'm not a LinkedIn
expert, but that's what I've noticed. Whenever I post kind of businessy content on LinkedIn, it does
much better than if I do on Instagram.
Like people just want bite size on Instagram.
They're scrolling.
But on LinkedIn, I feel like they're spending more time.
They want something more valuable.
So I don't know.
It's really interesting.
And what about your email list?
How does that weight in your business?
And do you put a lot of weight into creating a large email list?
Yes, 100%.
Because with social media, I mean, God forbid, anything ever happens.
But you don't want your business to be dependent on an Instagram account.
What if the algorithm changes?
or you get shut down or any of these things that could happen.
I don't want my audience base to be owned by another company.
And so as much as I possibly can, I funnel people to my email list and really, really build that up.
I think that's really state that you own.
And that's where I'm really, I really care about building.
And you believe, or your feedback that you're getting from your community is that even these younger people are using their email.
Yeah, I mean, our audience are about like 25 to 35 and our email list is super engaged.
and it's growing really, really fast.
And we just get really intentional about,
okay, what does it look like
from someone clicking the follow button on Instagram
to then becoming a subscriber on our email list?
That's a customer journey that we really care about.
And so just constantly asking them to join
and giving them like free challenges and downloadables
and reasons to sign up, I think is super important.
But yeah, we get an amazing engagement.
We haven't seen that drop.
I do think there's other pieces of like real estate online
that are interesting.
I think messenger bots.
I think text message, all of that feels very intimate, and we're building that too, but at the same time, it's the same messenger. You're not owning that.
Text message is different. Numbers, I think is great real estate. But I think we're moving more towards that kind of intimate.
That messenger bot, I just installed a bot on my website a month ago. And I've been blown away by the questions.
And it's really like you're having a conversation with somebody live, however you can't see their face.
But it's a great point that you just mentioned. But I still don't own.
that person because I don't have their email list. So how do you take that opportunity in a conversation
on a site and convert that into something where you get that takeaway? I would have like a handful of
freebies. So depending on what they're asking you, just say, oh, I've got the perfect resource for you.
Here it is. Send it to them. They put their email in. They get to download it. That's what we do. We like
try and respond to every single DM that we get. And we normally have a handful of freebies ready to go.
and based on whatever they're asking,
we'll funnel them towards a specific thing.
Or we've got quizzes.
We might say, hey, if you're stuck or you need clarity, go fill this in.
It'll give you it.
And obviously, they put their email in to get their results.
So just having those to hand and being able to hand them out very fast,
I think is a great idea.
I'm absolutely going to do that because I've had so many people come and have a conversation
on the site and I'm saying, geez, I don't know who that person is.
You can see the city they live in, but that's all you know, right?
And they must be asking the same things over and over,
but you could probably pool it into like five things, right?
Right.
Yeah, no, that's a great idea.
I definitely need to offer.
I currently only have two different free giveaways.
And now I just need to, like you're saying,
address the other topics that people are bringing up
so I can offer them that for a conversion point.
So talk about link tree to me because this is something I've heard conflicting information
on when we have our site up on Instagram and we, you know,
you have that one site you can drive people to.
Do you drive them to your website?
Do you drive them to a link tree so you can offer them a number of different?
things. What is that right answer? Yeah, I mean, I don't know that as a right answer. I don't use it
personally, but I do see value in some people using it. I think it really depends. I do love to see
people having a clear call to action because I think it's a lot easier to tell someone to do one
thing, then give them 10 options and they're just getting this decision paralysis. So I choose
not to use it. But if you are set, if you kind of are in one niche, but you have lots of different
things to offer, maybe you've got a blog and a podcast and a freebie. You're
could use it and I would I honestly love data and so I would test I would say okay this week I'm
going to use a link tree this is what the numbers look like next week I'm not going to use it this
what the numbers look like because I think there's no right answer for anyone it's all in data
and I make all my decisions based off data when I can so A B test and see what works for you
you have no formal training with data do you no this is all just self-taught yeah that's pretty
impressive and at such a young age it just it's really eye-opening to
me. So when you look back three years ago and you had just come to the US, did you have any idea
how successful your business was going to be this quickly? Did you see that happening?
Yes and no. Like I always had a lot of self-belief and I wanted to be a millionaire before I was
30 and obviously like all of that happened a lot sooner than I thought, but I never for a minute
doubted that I would be successful. Like I'm like a big manifesto so I always had things written down
in my journal. Like I would, and I still do it, I would write down what my day would look like.
Even, like, I would be like, I wake up, I see palm trees. Like, I didn't even have a green
card, nothing. I didn't know I was going to be able to stay in the States. Like, it's obviously
very hard to immigrate. So I didn't know any of this is going to happen. Like, when I first moved
to America, I was sharing a room with four people, all of my friends from college. Like, none of us
like had a penny to our name. And I just held that vision and I knew what I wanted. And I just kept
saying, yes, to opportunities. And I worked really, really hard.
and I really believe in tipping points. So you can work really, really hard and one day,
everything just clicks and it falls into place and then things happen a lot faster. And that's
definitely what I experienced. I think you push, push, push, and then you exponentially grow.
So, yeah, I always held that vision and I think I didn't give myself any other choice.
Well, I haven't reached the tipping point yet. So tell me how do you get yourself to stay on that
path during those moments where it's difficult and it feels,
tiring and you're wondering when is that tipping point coming because it should have already been here
by now you're thinking in your mind. Yeah, just hold the bigger vision and just know why you're doing it
and just keep pushing because there's always going to be hard points. Like even when you think you've made it and
you're like at the tipping point and then you're growing, then something's going to like,
like everything's going to fall down again. Like I feel like you're always going to have those hard points.
And so just really remembering why you're doing it. And one thing I'm really trying to get better at is
not be not let the lows be low and not let the highs be too high because what I realized like
especially as an entrepreneur like the highs can be really high and the lows can be really low because
if you think you're going to lose your business or something bad happens like it's all on your
shoulders this is your business this is your responsibility and there's not really anyone else
who's going to care as much as you do and it's a lot of weight and you can feel like everything's
falling apart and it can be really low or
the highs can be so high that you're like super energetic and what I've realized is that can be a really
draining, exhausting journey and so I'm trying to get to a place now where I don't really let either
or affect me and of course I'm going to feel like happy or I'm going to feel sad but I don't want
to be on that roller coaster anymore that I think I definitely have been on in the past because it's
draining and I want to be in a place where I'm like always calm no matter what's going on so that I can
lead from that way because it's not just me anymore and I've realized that's like pretty
and when you have a team like relying on you?
I feel like you just described all my romantic relationships.
I mean, getting addicted to that roller coaster ride is the same thing in business as it can be in relationships.
Do you subscribe to that same philosophy in your personal life then?
I mean, I'm trying, but it's hard, right?
It's hard.
It's hard, yeah.
How does it work at Boss Babe having a co-founder?
It's incredible.
I didn't realize until probably like a year or so ago,
but everything I've really done in my life that I've loved, I've done with other people.
Like, I've always been that collaborator.
I love, like, being at the table with someone else who brings the things I don't bring.
Like, I'm very good at seeing what I'm good at and what I'm not good at.
And I don't want to waste my time going and doing the things I'm not good at because no one's going to win.
No one's going to enjoy that.
And so I've always from, you know, being in school, like, found people that were going to help me win
and I can help them win at the same time.
and so I met my co-founder at a random like event like business event and it was really funny because
like we were with a bunch of people I actually went with a friend of mine it was all her clients I was meeting
and everyone was going out that night for drinks and I'm a Capricor and I was like go no I need to go to bed early
I need to be upsed I can be at the seminar and learn and all this stuff and my business partner was
exactly the same she was there too with her husband and they were like oh we're going to go out for dinner
and I was like great I'm just going to come with you and I like third wheeled and went out for dinner with them
And like we just had a really good relationship from that point.
And I, their relationship was very similar to mine and my husband.
So I was like, well, if nothing else, we'll just be a couple friends.
That'll be great.
And we just kept in touch from that event and started collaborating.
And then she, she, we started kind of talking about the idea of the society together.
And she decided to invest in Bus Babe with me and came on board.
And it's just been absolutely incredible because we're so completely different.
That's such a nice compliment for you both.
Yeah.
So where does Boss Babe go from here?
I mean, the expectations I would imagine and probably the pressure you put on yourself
because you've had this extreme success in this very short period, I'm sure everyone's
always asking, okay, so where do you go from here?
Yeah, we have big plans with Boss Babe, so I want to be the world's biggest, like,
community of ambitious women.
And that's going to look a lot of different ways.
So we're really building out all of our social, our blog, and just pushing really hard
that side and then continuing to bring out our product, like build out product line from
our, like, online based products to actual physical product. So we've got our first product
launching in December, which is a surprise, but it's going to be amazing. And then as of next year,
we're going to really build out that line. And I want everyone to know what boss baby is. I want
if I see any girl on the street to say, hey, do you know what boss baby is? And she tells me.
And I think that's where we're going. Will you start utilizing more traditional forms of
advertising instead of social media. Have you thought about that? Yeah, it's something that we're
thinking about. Our head of marketing, she's incredible. She came from Uber and she's very strong on the
brand marketing side, which is just something I never even knew about, really. I just was like,
let me just try and grow in Scrum and see what happens. And she's like, no, we need to be doing all
these different things. So we're definitely starting to get into it. But it's a big learning for me because
it's so new and so different. But to achieve your ultimate goal of having every woman know a boss baby, it definitely
sounds like it would be a great add-on for you. Yeah, it's needed. We started doing press like a few
months ago and that's been super interesting and I'm learning so much about what exists beyond
Instagram. That's so great. So when you have women, I'm sure you have some people in your community
and it's not even just for women, but when people aren't necessarily an entrepreneur yet,
maybe they have ideas of what could be in the future, but they're thinking, how do I set myself up
on social media just as me and how do I do it correctly to start creating a more of a personal
or a foray into something that I could potentially be an entrepreneur at some point.
How do you approach that?
I think getting really clear on what you want to be known for.
So whether you want to be an entrepreneur,
whether you don't just get really clear on what you want to be known for
and what your values are and what kind of,
I call them content pillars that you're going to share,
because you can't share every little bit of your life.
And so for me, my content pillars are, you know,
I share a lot of social, I share behind the scenes of business,
I share marriage, I share like health and biohacking.
and then there's a lot of things that I just don't share.
And so I got really clear on what I wanted to share
and just create content around them things consistently.
And I think that really helps you build your brand,
but just specifically thinking about what you want to be known for.
And so one thing I talk about a lot on my social is like boundaries.
I have crazy boundaries.
I really believe in work life balance.
Like I don't want to get to 50, 60 and start looking back on my life thinking,
oh, I really wish I'd spent more time with my friends or family.
I just don't want that.
And so I share that.
that very vocally and it goes against what a lot of entrepreneurs share online like hustle hustle you need
to work harder. I'm like no I want to watch Netflix and like eat a whole bag of chocolate like I want to
chill and still build a business and I want to be that voice for doing business differently and so that
was one of my pillars and so really thinking through okay what do I want to be known for as me and then
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So how do you create boundaries
because so many people struggle with this?
I was just at an event last week
and people were messaging me,
come out here, you need to come out for a meet and greet,
and I was trying to get ready for the event.
and the old me would feel obligated to go out there because people are supporting you
and you want to thank people and be a part of their life and appreciate them.
But the new version 2.0 of me said, thank you.
I'll be worth your weight.
See you in 15 minutes.
You know, because I had to take care of myself in order to go out there and do a great job for them.
So, I mean, what does that look like creating boundaries in your world?
I mean, exactly what you've just described, like being very aware of it.
For me, it was getting really clear on what my priority.
are like my number one priority is my health like if I don't have my health I'm dead and no use to
anyone when I'm dead so like it sounds really bleak but it's true my husband probably wants me to say
he's my number one but it's health so that's my number one second to that is family and friends like
of course my marriage super important and no business is more important than that like that's what
really matters to me and then it's business and so I think in order of those priorities and I like
look back at like each week and I'm like did I put the time?
I needed into my health? Like, did I really look after myself? Or did I spend enough time with my family
and friends? Did I set those boundaries? And then work is super important to me. Like, it's definitely
in the top three, but it's not my entire life. Like, I want my business to be a vehicle for the
life the life I want to live, not me being a vehicle for the life the business is taking on, which I was
in when I first started my business. Like, I was hustling, like, I didn't sleep. Like, it was crazy.
And I got burned out so many times. But then I really realized what was important.
to me. So I have those order of priorities and I just like get better at saying no, which I think like,
you'll know it's so hard and sometimes I feel like I'm letting people down. But if I don't feel good,
then I'm never going to do good. And I certainly can't live out my purpose, which is, you know,
really impacting women and motivating women and really encouraging them to be like unapologetically
ambitious. I can't do that if I'm drained and exhausted and burned out and not loving what I do.
and so that comes before like answering every single DM or every single comment like those are things that have very little impact and I want to spend my time doing things that have bigger impact so I think it's just that balance and then within my company I really believe in leading by example and I want everyone that works with us to have a good work life balance and so it's one of our core values and every single like team meeting we have I remind people of that if I'm seeing them not take care of their health if I'm seeing them work too much I pointed out and then I also
lead by that like I take vacations and I completely switch off and I tell my team if you need me I'm not
available so figure it out and they kind of get used to it that's such a refreshing description of a
company because my time in corporate America I didn't work for companies like that it was the
antithesis right it was you better get this done and if you're pulling all night or you know this is
deadline jobs on you you need to figure it out and to me when I hear you talk about how you're
aiding this business, this community.
It's all about passion, purpose, putting yourself first and doing it in a really healthy way.
It's funny to me that it sounds so crazy.
It's actually sad, right, that we live in this culture that people are more accustomed to being browbeaten by a boss and told, just get it done.
And I don't care that you haven't seen your child.
It's really exciting to hear that there are companies out there that want to take care of employees and leadership by example does exist in a really positive.
way. I remember when I was younger, probably your age, when I was in a management role, I would be
afraid that if I left early, other people would leave early and things. I was in a very different
mental state than you are now. It was more of this fear-driven awareness that I had that if I'm not
there and hands-on, it's not going to get done correctly and it's my tail at the end of this and I've got to
deliver the number and I led that way. So in my eyes, it was leadership by example. I outworked
everyone. But like you said, I mean, you get to this point where I am years older than you that now I
look back and think of how much I gave up. And what I've learned, and I want everyone to understand this,
the company is not going to be appreciating you 25 years later and singing your praises. Things are going
to change. Companies are bought and sold. Leadership changes occur. People get sick and leave.
You know, a million different things can happen. In that moment, you feel like it's everything.
However, now that I have this hindsight, I gave up vacation.
I gave up family time. I gave up time with my baby, you know, that, yes, I built great experience and no one can take that away from you. But when you look back and you say, you know, I probably could have done a great job and taken a couple of vacations, I don't think that the company was going to implode, right? And it's about how do we find good people to work with that agree with us and think that same way. And it's really great to hear there are companies like this because I think more and more people are trying to recruit people with that same messaging.
Yeah, and it's, it is crazy that we think this is like a wild idea to take vacations, to take time off.
And I think the hustle culture is celebrated way more than it should be.
Like, why as humans do we think that making money or like spending mid, like midnight in the office is more important than being home snuggled up on the sofa with like our family?
Like I don't understand how that happened.
But I think it's a lot of it for me anyways comes from that fear or that lack and wondering.
oh gosh, I don't want to get in financial trouble.
And I've got this right now.
I'm having great ideas right now.
I'm young enough right now.
I need to lean into this.
However, it doesn't pay off.
So you mentioned biohacks.
What are some of your favorite biohacks you can share with us on how you keep yourself so healthy?
I love breathwork.
I think breathworks incredible.
Have you done it?
No.
Oh, my God.
You need to do it.
It's amazing.
So you do like breathwork for like an hour and you feel like an entirely new person because
sometimes I think we store like stress and anxiety and stuff we don't even know that we're storing
because we're so used to just taking everything on and when you do breath awake it takes everything away
it's incredible it's phenomenal and you can do it like you can go to class and learn how to do it and
you can do it like at home by yourself like it's super easy it costs barely anything so like that's the
number one thing I love so I highly recommend that um my diet is super important to me like I eat really
really clean. I try and eat for like good performance because for all I don't believe in like hustling
that crazy. Like when I am at work, I am so focused and I get so much shit done and I wouldn't do that if I ate
like crap. So I'm really, really specific about that. Like I eat to have good energy. Um, so that's a big one.
Sleep. I love sleep. I have like at least eight hours a night. Like I absolutely love it. I track my sleep with
an aura ring. I don't have if you heard of it. No. It tracks everything. And so it'll tell you how much
REM, how much deep sleep, how long it took you to fall asleep if you woke up, it'll track your
heart rate, your heart rate variability. And so you can really see trends of like if you're stressed
or if you're doing well or what a workout does for you. Like I test and track everything. So I love that.
Those are like my main ones. Meditation is super important to me. Like I think just being still and
quiet is something that we don't often do enough and it's free. Like there's tons of like tons of
hacks that I love that are more expensive. Like I have an infrared sauna that I absolutely love and I
try and use every single day. But I think like it starts with the free stuff. Isn't it unbelievable though
when you start thinking all the good things you can do for yourself and thinking how much time it's
going to take? All I just ran through my mind listening. I'm like, I want to try that. I want to try that.
And I still need to work out and I still need to go get my son. And then I need to get on this plane.
I mean, it's so hard to figure out and it goes back to your boundaries and priorities. You know,
what are they? Because it's so simple to let some of those things go. And it, and it,
creates a completely different situation for yourself.
Yeah, and just like thinking about, okay, what can I swap?
If I'm going to fit in like 10 minute meditation, what can I swap?
And like, so I didn't check my emails today to like 3pm because I was like, okay, I want
to go.
I threw a party last night for my husband's birthday.
And so I woke up this morning to feel like really slow and I'm like, no, I'm going to get
myself right before I even start working or anything because I'm going to be no good to
anyone if my energy is low.
I'm just going to be procrastinating.
And so I like, I feel like, okay, if I spend 30 minutes here, I'm going to gain an
hour here and I try and prioritize it that way it's a good it's a very good way to look at it and I
definitely going to try to do it I'm trying some of this breathing too I'm going to check that out yeah
just Google breathwork or like go to a class it's incredible it will literally change your life
okay I'm totally down for that all right so you can't get off the show with out answering this
question okay when in your life have you struggled the most with your confidence um when I went
to university so I came from a background where like my family didn't go to university
I didn't have a lot of money.
And I went to a really prestigious business school.
And everyone there spoke differently.
They had all been to private schools.
And I remember the first week I was in the toilet cubicle, crying my eyes out, calling my boyfriend at the time.
Just like, people like me don't belong here.
And I felt like such an imposter.
And I had so little confidence.
And he, like, give me the pep talk.
I needed that week.
And it literally took me a couple of years to really work on my confidence at uni.
I don't know what it was.
I just felt so out of place.
And I didn't.
I totally didn't by the time I left.
I loved it and I had some amazing friends.
But it was a big, like, shock to me going there.
What were some of the things that you did that allowed you to start creating confidence?
Well, I started just getting really, really good grades and becoming top of my class.
And I think I felt like I had something to prove to myself.
And so I just ended up really killing it.
So that helped.
I did hypnotherapy for, like, confidence and self-esteem.
It was amazing.
Amazing.
I've done it too.
Yeah, that was really, really good for me.
But I think mainly it was just like achieving things that was proving to myself that I could do it.
I think I doubted myself a lot and that helped.
But I think that's probably not like the healthiest answer because it can be really addicted.
Like it can be an addictive thing.
Yeah, but it's also like what you said, you said that it's that evidence that you're looking for of achievement, which still has shown up for you today.
And it's helped you today.
Yeah, I definitely have like an addiction to achieving things.
It's not a bad addiction.
There are worse ones.
Yeah, probably.
Yeah, the help of hypotherapy was great.
I still do it now.
It's so good.
I actually just did it on the plane on my way out here.
Oh, you do?
Yeah, once you've been exposed to it and worked with someone,
it's so simple to just fire it up on your headphones and zone out and wake up just feeling
so much better.
Yeah, because I feel like any kind of personal development work you do.
It's never like one and done.
It always like comes back, but you just get better at dealing with things and it takes you,
maybe in the past it would took you a week and now it takes you.
a day or whatever. It's never done. So I'm a big believer in like keeping it going. Well, you are
keeping Boss Babe going. That is for sure. And I'm so excited to see what you do next. Where can everyone
find you, Natalie? They can find us on Instagram at bossbabe. Inc. at I am Natalie for my personal or
bossbabe.com. Thank you so much for being here today and continued success to you.
Thank you for having me. I hope you love Natalie as much as I do. And I'll tell you, I took her
free, if you go to Boss Babe, her handle on Instagram, her company profile page, she did a free
training on Instagram growth hack, and I actually did it the other day and it was really,
really good, very interesting. I highly recommend it. It does not cost anything. Check it out.
It's definitely worth, if you want to learn, if you're just interested in knowing a little bit
more about how her idea pans out, what her plan and strategy is, you don't have to be huge into
Instagram just to be willing to open your mind to learn a little bit about different
business models, different business strategies, but I thought it was very, very good, well done.
So check it out. It's free. Okay. So this is interesting. I have some good friends that I
haven't seen in years that now listen to the show with us and it makes me so happy to get
DMs and messages for them. One of my friends sent me a note and said, hey, I thought I should
share the story with you in keeping with the building competence theme. I was working on cleaning
up my LinkedIn profile last week and realized I did not have any recommendation.
What? But listening to you, I figured, why not? I should just get some. So I reached out to a few colleagues, one of them being my former CEO. I worked with him for eight years growing the company, going public, getting a drug approved, and consider him a friend. So he wrote a glowing recommendation but focused on operations and did not mention the strategy development piece, which is really what separated me apart from everyone else and was really what made me special. At first, I was so mad thinking that he did not respect.
me or respect what I had done. But then I thought, why don't I just ask him to tweak it a little bit
for me? So I did ask him, stay tuned. And this is so good. Well, of course you should ask because
I was thinking when I saw us, no, I'm sure he had no bad intent. I mean, come on. But anyways,
I heard back for my friend last night and the CEO tweaked it for her, didn't know that that was
of interest to her and wrote her a glowing recommendation she is so proud of and she is now showcasing
on her recommendation while on LinkedIn.
So if you don't ask for what you want, you do not get.
People get what they ask for.
Show up.
Ask for what you want.
And if you need to ask for something to be tweaked, ask for that too.
People like helping other people, at least nice people do.
Okay.
So I got this question.
I have this bot.
I think I've shared this with you before on my website,
Heather Monaghan.com.
It's like a little head.
And it's a Drift bot.
The company Drift owns the bot program.
and this little head says, hey, can I help you?
So someone, a visitor of my site, wrote this.
Hey, my coworkers don't respect me and I'm tired of the snarl face looks and sarcasm from them.
But when they're stuck on an issue and need an answer, I am the one they come to.
I'm getting really sick of being nice to them when they're mean to me.
Okay, here's the thing.
People will treat you the way you allow them to.
So number one, how I'm sure they don't treat everyone like that, right?
So now you need to take ownership of this.
No need to get mad.
Remember, there is no place for emotion in business.
Instead, let's show up as the best version of ourselves to work.
That means taking time to get ready to iron your clothes, you know, get your outfits together.
Really put that professional best version of yourself forward at work every day.
Maybe it means you need some self-care and to invest in yourself to allow yourself to feel special.
Start practicing gratitude.
start writing down the great things about yourself.
Use affirmations if you need to.
I am worth more.
I am enough.
I am confident.
Whatever it is, but you've got to fire yourself up.
Play your playlist like I do.
Anytime I'm going into a situation that makes me nervous,
where you feel your best and your strongest.
Bring your lavender scent with you to smell right before you walk into the meeting
to keep yourself calm and centered.
But then at the end of the day, what you need to do is I'd ask some questions.
If someone's giving you a dirty look and asking for your help, I would walk up to them and say,
excuse me, could I talk to you for a minute, please?
That will call these people out.
There's nothing wrong with being kind and asking questions.
I would ask to speak to someone alone if they were giving you dirty looks in a meeting.
And when you were alone, I would say, I'm really confused.
Did I do something to offend you?
I keep seeing you giving me really negative looks, and I'm not sure what's wrong.
Can you explain to me what's happening?
And there's nothing wrong with doing that, right?
Because what you're doing is you're calling that villain out.
You're letting them know, oh, heck no, this is not going to go on anymore.
You don't need to be mean or rude when you do it.
You're just asking questions and coming from a place of kindness and curiosity.
So now the onus is on that person to explain to you why.
Probably what they're going to say is, oh, I wasn't giving you a dirty look.
Really?
You know, that's what I would say, really?
because I'm pretty sure I saw it a couple of times.
So I'm just confused.
Then they're going to say, no, no, no, that's my resting face or whatever.
Thanks for understanding.
I did not, you know, mean to give you a dirty look.
Well, you've called them out and let them know that's not going to go on anymore.
Now, the next time that person comes and asks you for help, you know, with whatever it is they're working on,
that's another opportunity to kind of revisit the situation and create those boundaries
for yourself showing that you warrant respect, you know, and maybe it's saying, listen, John,
I'm really swamped right now. I understand you need my help. Give me a little bit of time.
I've got to continue working on my priorities right now, and I will get to you as soon as I can.
Let them know that they're, you know, just because they said their life's on fire and they need
you to put the, you know, fire out doesn't mean that you're willing to drop everything.
You have priorities too. You are important. And in fact, you're putting yourself first and you will
get to their issues when you can and when you're available.
So really respect yourself, invest in yourself, put you first and create those boundaries
and don't ignore negative behavior.
Don't ignore passive, aggressive behavior.
I did that for a long time with a woman at work, and all it did was it allowed her to
keep building strength, and it made me feel worse about myself that I was turning a blind
eye.
So it's much better to say, hey, did I do something wrong?
I feel a sense of negativity coming from you.
Is everything okay?
That really changes the dynamic and you don't need to be mean when you do it.
So hoping that the visitor to my site was able to do this and able to move forward from this situation.
Okay, what else do I have here?
Oh, Heather, you're a great role model.
Oh, thank you.
Do you have any tips to get speaking engagements?
My dream is to speak more around the country.
I've not found many who are doing this.
Can you advise me how to start?
All right, I did a whole episode on this.
The Kendra Hall episode on my podcast literally walks everyone through exactly what you need to do to become a speaker.
It took me over a year to figure all this stuff out.
Even as you heard today, I'm still figuring this stuff out.
So just because you haven't figured out yet doesn't mean the answers aren't out there.
You just have to keep pursuing them.
I do have the answers for you.
Go ahead.
Go back to my main page for creating confidence and scroll down.
until you find the Kendra Hall episode. That episode has everything that you want to know about the
speaking business. And again, just because you don't have the answers yet doesn't mean they're not
out there. Just keep searching. And just like Natalie at Boss Babe, she figured out the way to hack
Instagram, how to hack this growth. Well, you know what? I didn't know that existed, but now you
know it exists. So just because you haven't figured something out yet doesn't mean someone else
hasn't or that you're not going to figure it out next. So just keep going.
Keep asking great questions and keep showing up here with me every week.
I appreciate you so much.
Please rate and review my podcast when you do send me a screenshot of your review,
and I buy you my $299 video course as a big thank you.
I can't wait to see you next week.
Keep creating confidence.
I'm doing it with you.
