Creating Confidence with Heather Monahan - #234: Step Into The POSSIBILITIES Of What You Can Create, With Heather!
Episode Date: July 13, 2022In This Episode You Will Learn About: Getting comfortable with change Noticing clear signs Timing is everything Resources: Overcome Your Villains is Available NOW! Order here: https://...overcomeyourvillains.com If you haven't yet, get my first book Confidence Creator Show Notes: Change can be very healthy for you! Let go of the past that is holding you back and know that you deserve happiness. Try staying open to signs from the world telling you that you’re in the RIGHT PLACE, and commit to the future you want. If things aren’t happening for you right away, don’t worry! Timing is EVERYTHING, and what is meant for you WILL find you. Put out the energy you want to attract! The change you need will come to you!
Transcript
Discussion (0)
I'm on this journey with me.
Each week when you join me, we are going to chase down our goals.
We'll overcome adversity and set you up for a better tomorrow.
I'm ready for my close-up.
Hi, and welcome back.
I'm so glad you're back here with me today.
Okay, so major updates happening.
Major.
I'm going to try to share with you today the process that I went through or I've gone through
over the last few months to try to bring about change in my life.
life, right? Which was not easy. However, I really believe that it worked. I mean, the proof is in the
pudding, right? So let me cut to the chase. Okay. As you know, so bizarre, I started saying,
this is, gosh, months ago. This is probably back in January. I started saying, I don't know how,
but I know some way that my son and I are going to move to a new home with so much space.
by the way, I live at a two-bedroom condo on the ocean in Miami Beach, which is gorgeous, right?
I live in the most beautiful place in the world on the water for 17 years.
I love it.
However, to live in a pandemic with a child in Zoom in one room and me in the other room on the computer and Zoom all day and we had no space, right?
So ever since that happened, it just became clear to me I really wanted to have space.
That was something really important to me.
And I didn't know how it was going to happen, but I just, it's.
been something I've been putting out to the universe, right? This is what I want. Don't know how it's
going to come to be. And the reason why I say that is I bought this place in 2005, which was literally
at the height of the market. South Beach was on fire. You couldn't even get in very similar to what
it's like now. But because I bought at the height of the market, I just always assumed I had to own this
place forever because I wouldn't be able to make a profit. I just ended up renting it out years later,
but I felt I was stuck here.
Okay?
So as long as I held on to that belief, I remained here.
Key changed the belief, right?
So I started just putting out to the universe that I knew we were moving to a really spacious,
beautiful, again, lots of space.
He could have his own floor.
I could have my own floor.
I mean, big goals here, right?
So anyhow, I kept putting that out to the universe.
And on the daily, I had it written down, right?
Like, I commit to it.
I visualize it happening.
And for a while, nothing happened.
During this time, my son goes to school very far away.
And it's almost like it's a 45 minute to an hour ride to school every day.
You have to cross multiple causeways, which means real potential for massive traffic.
I was spending so much of my time in the last year in a car.
It was truly causing me anxiety.
I was like getting panicked when I was driving.
I just was so sick of just wasting time.
And for my poor son, too, you know, who had to wake up at 5.45 in the morning.
to get to school. It's just, it's crazy. No one should have to, you know, live like that unless you want to,
unless you're a morning person, which 545 for a young boy in middle school is pretty early. Okay,
so I was clear on what I didn't want, right, which was helpful. I knew I didn't want to live so far
from his school anymore. I knew I didn't want to sit in traffic and waste time so much anymore
and spend so much of my day driving, right? So I was really crystal clear on what I did not want.
Now I needed to start getting clear on what I did want. So I wanted to,
to live closer to his school, closer to his friends, so that I wasn't an Uber driver every day
just driving him around, right? I wanted something that's easier, easy. Doesn't that sound so
nice? Oh my gosh, I love easy. Right. So I decided I wanted something easy with a lot of space
and beautiful and just easier. So I was putting that out to the universe, right, for a while,
and definitely talking to people about it, not knowing what would happen, and wouldn't you know
randomly? And if you've been with me listening to the show for a while, you already know this part
of it. But all of a sudden one day, my neighbor walked up to me on my floor. She literally
used to live next door to me, super nice woman, and said, hey, you should put your house up for sale.
We just put ours up and we made a fortune on it. They haven't lived here that long. So I thought,
oh, you know, they probably didn't buy it the worst time in the world like I did. And I said,
oh yeah, that sounds great. I wish I could move. That would be amazing. She said, well, talk to my realtor
because we just sold our place. We're moving and, you know, there's other buyers that wanted our place.
Maybe they'd buy yours. I said, okay, yeah, I will, I'll talk to them. And so I'd go inside.
The next day I get home, right, I did nothing about it. I was thinking about it, but I didn't do
anything. And I got home and there's a note on my door from my neighbor. And it says, Heather,
call my realtor. Here's his name, David. Here's his number. And I thought that was interesting, right?
She's not a pushy person at all.
She's so sweet.
I don't even see her very often, right?
They have a couple different homes, and they're not always here.
So I just thought, you know what?
This means something.
I'm super open to signs from the universe, from God.
I'm always asking for them.
If you're not, start asking for them because it's incredible what you'll find.
But anyhow, so I thought, okay, this is a sign.
I need to call.
So I call the realtor immediately calls me back.
And he says, listen, I can sell your place in a week.
to two weeks tops a month. This is back at the end of April. So I said, okay, oh my gosh, this is
amazing news. I've been wanting to move so bad. My son goes to school so far away. It would be
incredible. Get over here and tell me how much you think you can sell this for. I bought it the
worst time. He and his partner come over, and right away, they tell me $500,000 more dollars than I paid
for it. I about fell over. I was so living in the past that I wasn't opening.
my eyes up to the real potential of what was happening in the marketplace in front of me.
I was just holding on this idea that I bought it the worst time and I could never sell.
So thankfully, my neighbor, you know, tapped me on the shoulder.
Thankfully, I'd been putting out to the universe to God that I wanted to move.
I wanted some opportunity to come along so that Dylan could get closer to school.
Anyhow.
Okay.
So I was super excited, right?
Over the moon.
He reached out to all the potential buyers that had wanted my neighbor's condo.
And so immediately we were showing my condo like, I don't even know, five times a day.
Now, let's pause for a minute.
This is where no matter what change you want in your life, there's going to be pain with change, right?
Like, change is you're going through some kind of an evolution, right?
So the painful part around selling my condo was you have to get it literally pristine.
You want everything so clean.
You can't have dishes around or laundry around or, you know, everything has to be as clean.
and as empty as possible.
They wanted me to purge through so much stuff,
you know, old boxes or papers or whatever.
So there was a lot of work that went on behind the scenes.
And as we were showing the condo so much,
he didn't want me here when he's showing it.
And I work from home, right?
So it was definitely a challenging window of time.
You know, I was just leaving my house whenever he would text me,
I've got someone, can I bring them by?
Sure, I would cancel a meeting or run to the car
and take the meeting in the car,
or it was just crazy. My point is it wasn't easy, right? We hadn't reached easy yet, but I knew
I need to go through this little challenging window to get to this better other side that I want.
So we want you to think about that for whatever change it is that you want in your life.
You're going to have to go through some kind of a struggle, right, and challenge to get there,
but it's so worth it. What do you do?
When you want more, start your business with Northwest Registered Agent and get access to
thousands of free guides, tools, and legal forms to help you launch and protect your
business all in one place build your complete business identity with northwest today northwest registered
agents has been helping small business owners and entrepreneurs launch and grow businesses for nearly 30 years
they are the largest registered agent and LLC service in the u.s with over 1 500 corporate guides
real people who know your local laws and can help you in your business every step of the way
build your business identity fast with northwest registered agent and get access to thousands of free
resources, forms, and step-by-step guides without even creating an account. Sign up for a free
account to begin managing your business hub with lawyer-drafted operating agreements, bylaws,
resolutions, membership, certificates, bills of sale, and more, all at no cost. Northwest is your
one-stop business resource. Learn how to build a professional website, what annual filings your business
needs to stay in good standing, and simple explanations of complicated business laws. With Northwest
privacy is automatic. They never sell your data.
All services are handled in-house because privacy by default is their pledge to all customers.
Don't wait, protect your privacy, build your brand, and get your complete business identity in just 10 clicks and 10 minutes.
Visit northwestregisteredagent.com slash confidence-free and start building something amazing.
Get more with Northwest Registered Agent at www. northwestredgisteredagent.com slash confidence-free.
If your anxiety, depression, or ADHD are more than a rough patch, you don't need just another meditation app.
Takayatry makes it easy to see a psychiatrist online using your insurance in days.
Takayatry is 100% online psychiatry practice that provides comprehensive evaluations,
diagnoses, and ongoing medication management for conditions like ADHD, anxiety, depression, bipolar disorder, OCD, PTSD, insomnia, and more.
Unlike therapy-only apps, Takayatry, eczes, and more.
Unlike therapy-only apps,
Takiatry is psychiatry.
That means you're seeing a medical provider
who can diagnose mental health conditions
and prescribe medication when it's appropriate.
All their 600-plus clinicians are in network with major insurers
so you can use your existing insurance
instead of paying monthly subscriptions or out-of-network fees.
You'll meet with an experienced licensed psychiatrist
who takes the time to understand what's going on,
build a personalized treatment plan,
and can prescribe medication when it's right for you.
Your care stays consistent and evidence-based.
Head to tachiatry.com slash confidence
and complete the short assessment to get matched
with an in-network psychiatrist in just a few minutes.
That's tachiatry.com slash confidence to get matched in minutes.
Starting the year with a wardrobe refresh,
Quince has you covered with lux essentials that feel effortless and look polished.
They're perfect for layers.
wearing, mixing, and building a wardrobe that lasts.
Their versatile styles make it easy to reach for them day after day.
Quince has all the staples covered,
from soft Mongolian cashmere sweaters that feel like designer pieces without the markup
to 100% silk tops and skirts for easy dressing up to perfectly cut denim for everyday wear.
Their wardrobe essentials are crafted to last season after season.
Their Italian wool coats are real standouts.
They're beautifully tailored, soft to the touch,
and built to carry you through years of wear, not just one season.
The quality shows in every detail, the stitching, the fit, the fabrics.
Every piece is thoughtfully designed to be your new wardrobe essential.
And like everything from quince, each piece is made from premium materials in ethical-trusted factories
that are priced far below what other luxury brands charge.
I can't tell you how much I am loving my new cashmere sweater.
It's a staple for sure, and I can't wait to give one to my best friend for her birthday this year.
It is timeless, gorgeous, and the softest thing I've ever touched.
Which quince pieces are you interested in?
I mean, from the bags to the denim, to the sweaters, to the jackets,
they're all incredible luxury high-end products without the high-end price.
Refresh your wardrobe with quince.
Don't wait.
Go to quince.com slash confidence for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns.
Now available in Canada, too.
That's Q-U-I-N-C-E.com slash confidence to get free shipping and 365-day returns.
Quince.com slash confidence.
So this went on, I don't know, for maybe a week or two weeks, and we immediately had two offers.
Oh my gosh, this is so crazy.
The first offer we had was almost full asking price.
It was like $50,000 less than asking price.
And my realtor is an expert in this business.
and he said, let's go back and push them to meet halfway.
Okay, sure.
She walked from the deal, right?
Because she just didn't want to negotiate and that was it.
Okay, so she was gone.
By the way, that was the best offer we ever got on the condo.
How crazy is that?
Because if you're aware of what's been going on, right?
Interest rates have skyrocketed and people are talking about recession
and the housing market suddenly started slowing down in the mid to end of May.
We didn't know this was coming, right?
Had no idea.
So that right after we lost that first buyer, a second buyer came, a little bit less than the
first buyer, still a lot of money.
And we said yes.
Okay, we're going to take the deal.
All cash should close really quickly.
From day one, these people were so difficult to deal with.
Nitpicking everything, it was just a nightmare.
And you could sense something not good was going on.
Well, my realtor explained to me, because I haven't sold a house in 17 years, that, you know,
they have to put a deposit down immediately.
Then they have to put a huge deposit down once you pass inspection.
And once that happens, that's when he wanted me to go find, you know, somewhere else for us to live.
But not until then, because you're not certain that you have the deal done.
Even though you have the contract, right, you don't have the money.
So it was the day of our inspection.
I went over to this super cute restaurant right next to my house, which is adorable.
And I was just drinking coffee, working over there.
And he was there for hours.
And he told me it was going to be super quick.
Red flag. Anyways, I came back. They said they wanted to meet the people that run the building.
Then they found out there was a legal issue, which every condo building has legal issues.
But they decided to say, tell Heather, she either cuts another 100K off the price or the steel's dead.
We're walking. So ultimately, they were trying a really dirty way of negotiating, which I think is extremely unethical.
I don't do business like that. And frankly, I don't want to do business with people like that.
So I said, no, my realtor was with me. We agree. We're like, we don't want to work with.
people like this, if this is how they operate, it's going to be worse, you know, going through the
next few weeks in closing this deal with them. Forget them. Okay. So up until this point, it had been
super busy, so much traffic, so many people wanting to see my condo. We put it back on the market.
But this is right when Memorial Day weekend had just passed. So in Miami, people leave in the
summer. A lot of people go to the Hamptons or wherever else they live for the summer and they just
disappear. So that demand of all these people shopping condos was gone. Tide. Tide.
is everything in business and in life. Okay, so that stunk. And I remember getting into such a funk,
like, oh my gosh, we missed the window. I can't believe, you know, of course, I went right to negative
Nelly land instead of saying positive, right? I got really negative. And we were not showing the
condo at all for like a week. So I called my realtor. I said, let's drop the price because we need
to stimulate something. And while we were fair market value, the market was changing. It was declining.
saw a lot of people decreasing price. And to me, I would rather have the peace and the ease of moving
and having that time back and not having to drive so much and have less money than hold out for
some ridiculous amount of money. So that was what we decided, lowered the price. Boom. Started
getting some showings again. Great. No offers. So bizarre. So I'm going through all this,
keeping my house pristine, leaving my house, running out to take calls from the car to go to a restaurant.
It was just very hectic for the last few months to say the least.
And even once I was on a flight to go give a speech, my realtor texted me, can we come to the condo?
I said, well, Dylan's there.
I can pray that he can get the house organized enough that it looks good.
Let's do it.
And he did.
Anyways, Dylan pulled it off.
He got the house organized.
He left the key at the front desk.
He went to the gym for an hour while they showed it.
It worked out great.
So that was super exciting.
But anyway, so this is just the total chaos of the last few months.
and this uncertainty not knowing. So two weeks ago, I think it was two weeks ago, I get a message
for my realtor and he's so upset. He wants to meet me in person. Well, I didn't have any time. I said,
let's just do it on Zoom if you need to see me. We get on Zoom. He's so sad. He says, Heather,
basically like we're in the thick of summer. There are not a lot of people shopping this market right now.
I don't think that we're, you know, there's a chance we can't sell this now because the market's
changed so drastically, I don't know what to do. I know you want to move because of Dylan and school,
and I know school starts in August. I'm freaking out right now. So he just, he got really negative, right?
So I had to give him a firm talking to about, listen, we've got to find ways, we've got to strategize,
we've got to look for creative solutions, and we have to stay committed to this is going to happen.
We've got to be certain that we're putting out that right energy and we're attracting that right
buyer, and we know what's going to happen. So he agreed.
and went back to market and wouldn't you know in the next week, we had two offers, neither
nearly as good as the other ones that we had previously. But at this point, I was just so
committed to moving and making it happen. So we decided the offer that we wanted to take,
you know, with the people. It was a company. It just seemed like a better deal than working
with these individuals. And anyhow, then it was delayed and then it was delayed. And I'll tell you,
in my mind, I'm going back and forth between, oh my gosh, I know.
know this is going to happen. I know this is going to work, right? This knowing and this certainty that I'm
putting the right energy and vibe out there. And then, of course, on certain not so great days,
becoming negative Nelly and then second guessing and panicking and freaking out, right, which does not help.
It definitely doesn't help. So I stayed committed to this knowing that the right buyer was coming,
that the deal was going to get done. And then I asked God for a sign. I said,
please give me a sign so that I know that this is the deal. And I know this one's going to go through.
And I'm just going to tell you that I got it.
And it was unbelievable.
And it got my attention.
And once that happened, I just knew it's done.
This is a done deal.
This is beyond me.
This is meant to be.
And I'm so grateful for it.
So then to show another sign on Saturday of this weekend, this past weekend, the paperwork
came over.
Paperwork doesn't come over on Saturdays, by the way, right?
It was fully executed.
And this offer came over on July 4th.
Like, everything is so, that doesn't happen.
Holidays.
People aren't buying properties.
And so all these amazing signs have been coming to me telling me that this is the right buyer,
this is the right time, and it's going to go smoothly and easily.
So to make a long story longer, you know, it's just been this kind of crazy tumultuous ride.
Definitely did not end out exactly the way I had predicted it, the way that it started, right?
Things have changed so drastically because you can't project what a marketplace is going to do.
You don't know what challenges may arise.
Timing is everything.
But the one thing you can control is your energy, your vibe, and what you're putting out there.
And I have total clarity that that really impacts things in such a big way.
You know, we all know that there's frequencies out there, right?
Like to tune into a radio station, you tune into a certain frequency.
Here's the thing.
You're always putting a frequency out there to the world.
And you need to start being intentional and aware of it to see what you're attracting, what you're bringing towards you.
and be mindful, right?
Your word choices, you know, your word is your wand,
and you're speaking things into existence by what you choose to say
or what you choose not to say.
And I've really, I've had a challenging few months with this.
I mean, so many of my friends were away on vacation
and we were invited so many places.
And I had to keep declining because my goal was,
I need to be omnipresent here to sell this property
and move as quickly as I need to so that this happens.
Right.
I want to make it as.
easy as possible for my realtor, as easy as possible for potential buyers. And that means sacrificing
some vacations and sacrificing, you know, some crazy work schedules and cleaning and whatever.
But in the end, it will be worth it. Right. So whatever the change and challenges that you're
looking at just realize you've got to go through that challenge, you've got to make some of those
sacrifices to get to that end goal. The biggest thing you need to do is really hold onto that vision
of what you want and stay committed to it and be really, really,
aware of that energy that you're putting out there during these moments, especially during the
challenging times. And I'll tell you, you know, for me, working out is such a saving grace.
I know I can get myself in a really good headspace if I can get myself to work out.
So that's been, you know, a daily commitment for me during this time is working out every
single day so that I can keep my vibe up. I can keep my energy up.
I can remind myself what it is that I'm working towards. I can keep that vision real.
And having it written down and revisiting it daily and picturing it in my mind.
Well, now here we are.
We've got a fully executed contract.
Yay, I'm so excited.
I have this knowing.
I know this is the deal.
I know what's going through.
I'm crystal clear on it.
And now I need to see where is it that I meant to live?
Where are Dylan and I supposed to live?
So it's a super exciting adventure of change and opportunity.
And as I look back, you know, I changed.
The perfume that I was wearing a few months ago, I changed the lotions that I was, like, I started all these little changes in my life, which might not sound like much, right?
Like not a huge deal.
But I believe it's like everything you do is putting out these little messages to the universe, to God, to your higher power.
And when you start doing that, you start building this momentum.
You start basically throwing up a flag saying, okay, I'm ready for this next great thing.
And it's interesting because I saw a friend of mine the other day.
she was explaining to me that she's been dating this guy and he's not really, you know,
everything she wants, but she's just going to date him because it's fun to be with somebody.
And I said to her, why would you do that?
That's putting out the message to the universe that this is what you want.
This is what you're happy with.
You're never going to find, in my opinion, what it is you really want if you're not
willing to let go and walk away of what you don't want, right?
Like, you've got to say goodbye to that if you want to open that door for what you truly want.
So I see that in so many different aspects of my life.
Even with my old job, right, I was miserable working side by side with that lady that
couldn't stand me for years, but I wasn't willing to quit.
So I stayed in an awful situation and perpetuated it.
I could have quit.
I could have made that leap and made that big transition, step through that challenging
time and opened up the door of opportunity, which eventually happened when I got fired,
but I didn't.
I stayed stuck in it.
So even though I was wanting to find another job, wanting to find a job,
wanting to find a new opportunity, those doors weren't going to open until I closed the one
that I was hanging on to.
So think about that in your life.
Like, what are you hanging onto or allowing for?
I see so many people, I know so many people settling for things, settling for bad jobs, settling
for bad relationships, settling for not being healthy, just because they don't, they're afraid
to let go of what is to see what can be.
The thing is, and I will go back to this so often.
is that sometimes the universe gives us something so much better that we didn't even know was out there
for us, right? I didn't know there was going to be a big speaking career for me. I didn't know there was
going to be this podcast and that you were going to be listening and that we were going to be hanging
together, right? I didn't know any of these things were going to happen until I was willing to let go
of what was and step into the possibility of what could be. Super scary. I get it. And listen,
And I'm trying to tell you, I still toggle back and forth, but I'm getting better.
It's like retraining yourself.
One of the things that was helpful for me, it might be helpful for you, is learning, learning new things, listening to different people, listening to people who have been where you want to go will start allowing your mind to think differently and start seeing possibilities.
So I made a decision a few months ago no longer to listen to radio or music or whatever in the car, but instead to listen to audiobooks and podcasts that would train me to.
think differently that would teach me new ways of thinking and would help me to focus on what I want
to create. And I think it's had a big impact, right? Like, I'm constantly running these loops in my mind
of what the potential of my future can be. And I'm focusing on these changes and I'm making small
changes all around my life to show the universe at God that I'm ready for these bigger ones. And I'm
seeing it come to fruition now. And it's so exciting. And I want that for you, right? I know it's super
easy to get caught up in the headlines and all the negativity. I'm choosing not to participate.
I'm over it. You know, I chose to participate during COVID, and it took me to downtown
negative Nelly, like not a good train, not interested in going back. So instead, this time,
I'm going to focus on my mindset, my thoughts, and the possibility within me. And there is always
possibility. I think back to the 0809 recession and I just, I focused on all the negativity
and how scared I was. What I've learned now is that you have a choice to choose fear or you can
choose joy. You can choose love. Today I'm choosing joy and love. I'm not going to hang on to fear.
It doesn't end well, right? Like you end up harming yourself, whether you realize it or not at the time,
I want you to know that is a choice. And I get it. You're saying, well, maybe. Maybe.
for you it's a choice, but for me, I'm afraid I'm not going to be able to pay my bills or do this
or I get it. I felt the same way. But once I changed my thinking, those opportunities started
to present themselves and they weren't presenting themselves when I was hanging on to the fear,
when I was hanging on to what wasn't working. So choose to let go of what's been weighing you down.
Choose to let go of what you've been settling for. So you have that opportunity to open that door
to that possible future that is out there for you. I am living it right now. I promise you I'm so
living it and I so want you to be as well. So thank you for being here with me this week. I can't
wait to keep you updated on what's going on and where we're going to move and what's, I mean,
the whole thing is just, it's so exciting. It's like one big adventure and I'm grateful to be on it
with you. Until next week, keep creating your confidence. If you could leave a review of the show,
share the show with one person that you think it could help in.
impact. No one succeeds alone, and that includes me. Until next week, keep creating your
confidence. You know I will be.
