Creating Confidence with Heather Monahan - #247: The Keys to Building Powerful Business Relationships With Jordan Montgomery
Episode Date: August 30, 2022In This Episode You Will Learn About: Powerful business lessons for connecting with others Moving past your fears Collaborating with the people around you Resources: Website: www.mon...tgomerycompanies.com Listen to The Montgomery Companies Podcast Email: jordan@montgomerycompanies.com LinkedIn: @Jordan Montgomery Instagram: @jordanmmontgomery Facebook: @montgomerycompanies Twitter: @JMMontgomeryCo Overcome Your Villains is Available NOW! Order here: https://overcomeyourvillains.com If you haven't yet, get my first book Confidence Creator Show Notes: When you want to connect with someone, ask yourself, how can I ADD to this person's life? Adding value to other people’s lives WILL come back around to you tenfold! Jordan Montgomery, expert performance coach, and owner of Montgomery Companies is here to inspire us to RELEASE our fear of reaching out to others. When you lead with your truth, others will be able to connect with you on a deeper level. Tune in and learn how you can ask for the things you want in life, while being DIRECT and SPECIFIC about your needs! About The Guest: Meet Jordan Montgomery, the owner of Montgomery Companies, a Keynote speaker, and a highly regarded performance coach, with a C-Suite level executive clientele! He’s also the host of The Montgomery Company’s Podcast, and spoiler, I’m his favorite guest. Jordan travels the world sharing his career and confidence building expertise and is now here to help us all release our fears and move with confidence! If You Liked This Episode You Might Also Like These Episodes: How To Become A World Class Speaker with Gary Vaynerchuk’s Partner Zach Nadler, CEO of Vayner Speakers Why Radical Generosity Will CHANGE The Game For You and Your Relationships with John Ruhlin What Happens When You GIVE More Than You Ask For with Heather!
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Today, I get to say that sometimes God's preparation is packaged is pain.
You go through some really hard stuff, but he prepares you for a new season.
But the greatest gift that he gave me is the reminder that he is in control.
And I am not.
People say, well, adversity builds character.
Okay, that's bullshit.
No, it doesn't.
Adversity builds character if you allow it to.
So it's still a choice.
Like, it is a choice to fail forward.
It's a choice to say, I'm going to use this for good.
I'm going to get back up on my feet with the help of others and by God's grace.
And I'm going to move forward in this life.
I'm on this journey with me.
Each week when you join me, we are going to chase down our goals.
We overcome adversity and set you up for a better tomorrow.
Hi and welcome back.
I'm so excited you're here today and you are going to be so excited too to meet Jordan Montgomery,
owner of Montgomery companies.
He's a highly regarded performance coach, keynote speaker whose clients include
C-suite business executives, massive sales organizations, and noteworthy entrepreneurs.
He's also the host of the Montgomery Company's podcast, and I'm his favorite guest.
From small town Iowa to a dominant force in the performance coaching industry, Jordan travels
the country speaking on some of the most sought after stages and coaching top execs at Fortune
500 companies, professional athletes and elite salespeople. But more importantly, he's my dear friend.
Jordan, thank you so much for being here today. Heather, thank you for having me.
As much as we're friends, you're also someone who I've learned from, who I've followed, and I so much appreciate and enjoy. So it's been cool to follow your journey and be somebody who's followed your work and then to become your friend. And to be on your show is a gift. Love being with you on our show. And just want to say thanks for having me. So good to be with you.
Okay, guys. So let's start. I want to jump right into something. This is a powerful business lesson that I constantly preach about Jordan lives this firsthand.
And I want to get his perspective on it.
But when I first met Jordan, we had a mutual friend, David Nurse, thankfully connected us.
And I became a guest on your show.
And when we got off the show, immediately you said to me, Heather, hey, how can I help you?
Hey, how can I help elevate your message?
Hey, I think that you need to be beyond Bray Brown.
How do I help you get to make that happen?
Just genuinely wanting to help me, right?
Like reaching out to me in an effort to better me and help me and asking for nothing in return.
and P.S., everyone listening, he never asked me for anything. And over a year, we've been friends. He could have asked me for a million different things until I think last week was the first time you asked me for anything. I'm like, I'm happy to buy you an island is what I told you. Like, whatever you want, consider it done. So Jordan, where does that stem back to for you in business? Well, at the end of the day, I think, like, that's the right way to live. So if you want to be a person who's valuable to others, you need to add value to others. And I want to add value.
of valuable people. You're a valuable person who's impacting others and you're doing a lot of good
in this world. So for me to connect you with people, here's what I know. It helps you, but it helps
others. Because if I believe in you and I believe in your message, then I'm helping you bring your
message to the world, which ultimately creates more impact and adds more value. So first off,
it's the right thing to do. People know, I think, too, Heather, when you're doing it for your
own reasons or for theirs. That's just like abundantly clear and obvious. However, when you add value
to other people and you impact other people in that way.
I also believe this, it bounces back to you.
There's this great quote, and I'm going to forget the original source,
but it goes like this.
The world is a looking glass, and it gives back to each person a reflection of their own image.
So you're someone who's so many of people who have jumped to help.
I know there's people that like just love helping you, want to be around you,
want to add value to you because you've added value to a lot of other people.
and it's bounced back to you. So I think number one, it's the right thing to do. If you believe in someone
and you believe in their message, you should be adding value to them. But inside of that, it bounces back
and your world becomes brighter because of it. So that's my belief on just adding value in general.
First off, you've done that for me. I want to point this out. You've done that for me in all kinds of
ways. You've encouraged me. You've complimented me. You've shared ideas, wisdom, thoughts. You don't even
know that you're doing it. And that's part of your magic is you're just being you. So it doesn't always have to come in the form
like let me connect you with someone or let me put you in touch with this speaking opportunity.
Sometimes it's just being you and love it on people and encouraging people right where they're
at. And so I just want to point that out. You have done that for me and you've done that for me
as long as I've known you. Well, thank you for saying that. It definitely feels like it's been
way more one-sided than I've been on the receiving end of our friendship for sure. And something
that I want to point out for everybody listening is that is the right way to show up, right?
Jordan never asked me to be a guest on my show. I asked him because after a week or two ago,
he asked me for a small favor. And I said, yeah, done, consider it done, literally anything you want.
And it made me stop for a minute, guys, to think this. Wait a minute. I've been taking so much
from Jordan, so many introductions, so many connections, so many opportunities. Wait, what can I do?
And I remember sitting down after you shot me a note or something. And I sat down, I started making a list of
how are different ways that I can help Jordan. So twofold on this, which is one, when you
want to connect with people, start thinking about how you can serve them, how you can give to them,
that's the best way to get people's attention and do it in a real and meaningful way,
you know, it's just the right thing to do. But then two, it doesn't hurt once in a while to raise
your hand and say, hey, in the idea of reciprocity here, is there any chance you could help
me with this? The worst that someone could say is no, or it could be a situation like this
where you just open my eyes to, oh my gosh, there's so much I could do for you.
you. Thank you for even reminding me that I can, you know, jump in and help.
I'm glad you wrap that up because I do think this, there is a right way in a right time to
ask for help. And if you're not asking for help, shame on you. Like, we all need to be
able to ask for help. I think when we ask for help, though, we have to be really specific,
especially with busy people who have a lot going on. So the worst thing you could do for someone
listening to saying, hey, Heather, could you help me out or could you just put me in touch with
some people? Like a vague request will get a vague response. A specific request,
we'll get a specific response.
So I didn't ask to be on your podcast,
but I did say, hey, can you put me in touch
with some speaking bureaus, right?
That was this specific request.
And you were able to respond to that in a specific way
because I was clear and direct.
So I would say there is a right way
and there is a right time to ask for help.
When you do it, make sure you're direct
and you're specific.
And you've been very direct and specific with me.
Like, hey, here's the people I want to meet.
Here's what I'm trying to accomplish.
And you've made it easy for me to help you.
So I think you've done a great job of that.
And you've been a good example of that.
Yeah, you're still right.
When people send those general messages, hey, can you help me out?
I'm trying to further my career.
That's going into the trash because no one has the time to sit around and just pontificate
about what that actually means and what are you looking for.
And do I know that person?
So for sure, get really, really specific.
Okay, I want to get into this idea.
I think one of your superpowers is connecting people.
You're literally magic with it.
But the more I sat and thought about it before we got on the show today, I was thinking that it really goes back to who you are.
And guys, think about this. There's so much power in connecting people, not only from the magic that you create, you know, for making those connections, but for the good that you put out into the world and then how people reflect on you after the fact.
It's really your own brand value and how people see you.
When you and I first met, we became fast friends.
You have this amazing home life, this amazing business.
we just, you know, I felt like you were my little brother and we just hit it off immediately.
And then I'll never forget one time you were coming to Miami as you know, this is where I live.
And I said, oh my gosh, Jordan, I have to see you.
Like I can't because we'd only ever met on the computer, which I'm so over the computer.
So I said, oh my gosh, we have to meet in real life and I can't wait to meet your wife and see the kids and blah, blah, blah.
And you said, okay, well, come to my event on this day.
And I had a prior commitment.
I said, well, I can't do it that day.
I'll come to your hotel.
I'll meet you guys for dinner.
I'll come for breakfast.
I'll go for a run with you.
Like, whatever you want.
And you were so clear with me on this.
I'll never forget, Jordan.
He said to me, oh, my gosh, you know what?
I made a commitment to my family that when we are on family time,
I don't step outside of that inviting other people into those windows of time.
So my one day that I could meet with you is this day that I've dedicated, you know,
to work and meeting up with people.
But if you can't make that, we'll just have to wait until our next time that we meet up.
And I remember thinking like, are you joking me?
I was pissed, right? Because I'm like, no, I really wanted to see them. However, it spoke volumes to who you are. And I've never lost that in my mind, right? Like, I always think of, you are always a do the right guy. What you say is what you're going to do. And because of that, when you make connections for me, I know I'm going forth with that same level of people are putting me at that same level. I've got to run at that same level, which makes me want to be a better human. Has that been hard for you creating such?
strong boundaries in your life? I think I've had to do it because candidly, I'm not good at it.
And so if I'm not very intentional and if I don't communicate that up front and in a very real
way, I won't abide by it. So I know that sounds backwards. And I think there's a lot of people
that take pride. There's almost ego and like, I'm a family man and I've got boundaries.
Okay. Yes, I'm a family man. I love my family. But guess what? If opportunity calls and I'm rolling
around on the floor with my kids playing a game, I'll just admit, I don't always have the discipline
to avoid the phone or not take the phone call and continue to play Barbies with my three-year-old
daughter. Like, I do want to take that call. I'm like, hey, that's a cool opportunity. I can play
Barbies with my daughter later. And so if I'm not really clear and if I don't set the boundaries
and if I don't make rules that I stick to, all too often find myself taking that call or doing
something else when I really should be spending time with my child. And Jeff Wood said this to me.
He said, I don't want to be a business man with a family.
I want to be a family man with a business.
And I've never forgotten that.
Like, at the end of my life, Heather,
I want to be able to say that the people I knew best respected me the most.
And if I can't say that, shame on me.
If I win favor with other people who I barely know
or people who follow us on social media or listen to our podcast,
but the people inside the walls of my home don't really respect the way that I spent my time
and I live my life and I made my choices,
then that's not a life of purpose and meaning.
So I think I've just come to learn this about myself
that I don't always have the discipline that I need to have.
That's part of being human.
Sometimes I take the path of least resistance.
And so because of that,
I've had to just create really clear and solid boundaries
that I've decided to live within.
And my wife would tell you,
like, part of the reason we have that boundary is I haven't always honored her
the way that I needed to.
Like we've been on a lot of family vacations
where I've broken those rules.
And all of a sudden, I'm like, yeah,
but I've got to get coffee.
and then I got to see this person for lunch.
And she's like, what the hell?
We're on family vacation.
What are you doing?
And so that hasn't just happened.
It's not like I was like, oh, let me set boundaries because I'm a mature family man who has it all figured out.
It's actually the opposite.
I've screwed it up so bad and I know myself well enough to know that I've got to have boundaries
so that I can honor my kids and my wife because that's what I really do care about.
At the end of the day, I don't want to live a life of regret.
I want to say that, hey, the things that I valued most, the people that I valued most
and the way that I spent my time were congruent.
And I'm still learning that and I'm still figuring that out.
Back to your point, though, about the who you are thing.
And I just want to speak to this because I think there's a common mistake that a lot of people make in connecting.
And I've made this mistake too.
But sometimes especially when we connect people in business, we have a tendency to make it all about what people do.
So it's like their role, their title, their podcast, their book, their accomplishments, their achievements.
And there'd be a lot to talk about in that realm with Heather Monaghan because you've accomplished.
a lot. But I think what always means more is when you talk about who somebody is versus what they do.
So I could say, hey, Heather's a top 50 speaker. She's a bestselling author. She's world class
at the art of speaking and writing. And she's done all this stuff professionally. She was on top of
the world and the radio business. And so all of that can be impressive to someone. And you can even
receive that and feel pretty good about it. But if I say, hey, you should connect with Heather.
because she is one of the best people that I know.
She has unbelievable energy, charisma.
She's thoughtful.
She's forward thinking.
She has awesome values.
She's a rock star mom.
See, there it goes.
You're feeling it.
Like, that's a big deal.
And like, people want to be connected that way.
I don't want to be connected as a podcast host and a speaker and like this guy who
runs a coaching company.
There's a bunch of people to do that.
I want to be connected because I'm a certain type of person who lives a certain
type of life.
And when people speak to me that way, that connection.
that language, that communication resonates a completely different way. And I will never forget the
person who honored me that way, who connected me that way, who took the time to think about not just
what I do, but who I am. So for anybody that's out there thinking about connecting, just try to
prioritize the who over the do. The do is still important. What you do matters. It's just not as important
as who you are. And your connection will mean more and it will be more effective if you speak to the who
and to do. So I just wanted to point that out. And you're good at that too. You've done that for me
repeatedly. You've made it about not just what I do, but about who I am. And I appreciate that so much.
Just so everyone knows, he's the real deal for anyone that's wondering right now. Is this guy full of
shit? He's not. Actually, this is who he is. And that's why to me, I like that you just taught that because
I don't know, Jordan, that I do that for everybody. I think sometimes if I'm in a rush and someone says,
hey, can you connect me to so-and-so? I just flip off like, this guy's la-la-la-la-la. And I do the do.
I don't take the time to be thoughtful about the who. But because you are such a special person,
sending someone a connection to you without giving that color is selling everybody short,
and that's why I didn't do it. But thank you for explaining that to me because now I can be more
thoughtful moving forward. When you are connecting people, for me on the receiving end for you,
it's sort of random. Like you will never give me a heads up or, you know, very rarely. And then you just
throw these long voice notes with multiple people on threads and all this insanity. And it's always
very thoughtful and it's super helpful and provided so many opportunities for me. And I'm so great
for it. But how do you do that? To me, you're literally one out of two people that the ultimate
connectors that I know in life. You're so good at it. Like, do you sit around one day a week and think
about, like, how does that all come to be? You know, I would love to tell you that I've got like time on my
calendar. It's this like practice that I think about at certain times of the day. It's not. I just,
I don't know. When I meet somebody like you who needs to know somebody else, I just try to think about
how could I add value. And I will say this. I think one of the greatest gifts that you could give to another
person is a relationship. It's a connection. And we forget that. And so I want to give my connections
as many connections as I can possibly give. And what I've also learned about getting connected is that
connecting people are connected people. So if you want to get connected, you got to connect. You want to be
a connecting person who ultimately then gets connected. And I think I learned that in the early days of my
career in financial services. Because every financial advisor, they're like, hey, I want to get connected.
I want to be at the in circle, at the country club or with whatever friend group, you know,
and I want to be able to get in there and do business.
And I come from a blue collar background.
I didn't know anybody with money.
I didn't know anybody with influence.
My mom was a teacher.
My dad's a painter.
And I was like, shit, I got to work with people who have money.
I can't do financial planning for people who don't have any money.
And I think I just started candidly to connect people almost from like selfish ambition.
I was like, well, if they connect, if I connect them, maybe they'll connect me.
And then it became a rhythm and a habit.
I've started to see the value and the doors that it's opened and the impact that's created.
And so I guess I'm proud to say it's not something that has to be on my calendar because I think
it's just turned into sort of part of who I am.
And it's something that I genuinely enjoy and love to do.
And I do send rambling long text messages.
And for anybody listening, you all know Heather Monaghan is pretty blunt and candid.
One of my first connections, just so everybody can hear this, you're like, yo, thanks for the connection.
But dude, you got to stop sending those voice notes.
that shit was way too long.
So cut it from like three minutes down to one,
I don't need all the other jets,
which actually was really good feedback.
But I love you and you are consistently providing
that kind of candid feedback in my life.
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I am a firm believer in brevity is a superpower, right?
Like, we're all busy.
Everybody's busy.
And to your point, we're doing all this so that we can spend time with the people that
we love and, you know, do the things that we want to be doing, right?
While making a difference in doing good in the world, I don't have seven minutes for a
message from someone.
Like, let me just shoot everyone straight.
There is a power in cutting to the chase.
And, you know, too often people want to just give color and commentary.
And too many people are bombarded with messaging in our society and with media and social media and just all the noise out there that they want to know what's the crux of this.
What's the benefit and what's my to do?
And then let's all, you know, shake hands and part friends and move on.
And so, yeah, I'm a big preacher on brevity is a superpower and Jordan's getting so much better at it.
I'm so impressed.
Hey, I'm learning all the time.
But to that end, okay, I think somebody needs to hear this who's struggling with that.
When it comes to communication, very few people, I don't care if it's a speech, a coaching
call, a podcast, a conversation.
Very few people are saying, I wish that went longer, even when it's good, even when it's good.
So like, I think one of the primary rules in communicating is be done early, like get done early.
If it's a 20-minute speech, make it 19 minutes.
If your podcast episode is supposed to go an hour on to that person's time and get
done at 55 minutes. Don't tell somebody, hey, do you got five minutes? Because you don't really mean
five minutes. You mean like 30. Tell them, hey, do you have four and a half minutes? Or do you have
seven minutes? Like literally, I had this happen to me the other day. Heather, somebody started their
cell phone. They started the clock on their cell phone with an alarm. So they said, hey, do you have
nine minutes, not 10, but nine? They started an alarm on their phone and said, I want to honor your time.
I've got nine minutes. I want to dig in. Now, that sounds kind of crazy and maybe a little bit overdone.
But I'll tell you, like, I got to the end of the nine minutes, and I was like, hey, you know what?
If you want more time, like, I'd love to give it to you because that's awesome.
And you were willing to honor my time.
You got to the point.
You cut to the chase.
I really appreciate that.
And you wanted to go longer.
I wanted to go longer.
So that's the key.
So like, to your point, and I know I joke with you, and I try to be brief too.
I think sometimes I am long in voice notes.
But in general, when it comes to communication, people just don't want the full thing.
Our world moves too fast and people are too busy.
So so much agreed with what you just shared.
So Jordan, one of the things that I've gotten to know about you over the last year is what an incredible and powerful speaker you are, right?
And from various people who have seen you and literally comparing you to the best in the industry, you know, I've watched your footage is incredible.
What tips can you share?
Because I'm constantly asked about how to be a better communicator, whether it being a presentation at work or, you know, a teacher's meeting or, you know, a teacher's meeting or just.
just anywhere. What are the steps or tactics people can implement in their life to be a more
powerful speaker like you? Something I'm learning is that when you take a stage, when you jump on a
podcast, when you're in front of any kind of audience, big or small, almost always, if you're getting
introduced as the presenter, as a subject matter expert, or as the authority in the room, because
you've got that hour or 30 minutes or 20 minutes or whatever it is, something I'm learning
is that there's almost always disconnect immediately. And as a speaker, you don't always realize
that. So I'll pick on you for a second. Heather lives with Heather every single day. So you know your
faults. You know your weaknesses. You know all the dumb things that you've done throughout the day and
throughout the week. So you are just you, right? But you get on stage, let's say to TED talk,
right, like that big TED talk you did. And somebody just read your big fancy bio. So they read this
big fancy bio. And then you walk out onto the stage confidently because that's who you are.
And here you are this smooth talking, good looking professional who's like,
got it together. And then you deliver this powerful, like, first, you know, sentence or two. And
everybody's like, I don't feel connected. And you've barely said anything, right? You're like,
but that's unfair. I haven't even done anything yet. So if I think for anybody communicating to
realize that if you are a subject matter expert, if you're being asked to present, you need to
think about connection before you think about communication, understand that there's disconnect.
And the goal should be, how do I connect with this audience as quickly as I
possibly can because I don't want them to see me as the fancy keynote speaker with the big old
bio who thinks I'm so good and I've got it all figured out. I want them to see me as a real
human. I want them to know that I'm just like them and they're just like me and I came to
bear a real authentic and meaningful message. Craig Rochelle says it this way. He says,
people can be impressed with your strengths, but they connect to you through your weakness.
So one thing we have to think about when we communicate publicly is how do I share
something about me or about my work or about my background or about my journey that makes me
very ordinary and very common to everybody else. It's not my fault, but because of the situation,
the environment, the bio that they just read and the way that I walked onto the stage,
I have automatically created a disconnect. And I got to close that gap as quickly as I possibly can.
So that's one, like if you're asking, hey, for a quick tip, that's one thing that I'm learning
that I would just share with our audience. And then the other thing is maybe a formula or a cadence for
speaking. I'm learning this too. And you know all this shit, right, Heather, because you're
ahead of the game. But I think most young speakers don't have this figured out. And so what they'll
do is they'll make a claim, they'll make a point. And then that point sometimes is accompanied
by facts, sometimes accompanied by a story, and sometimes accompanied by a to-do. But more often than
not, a speaker will make a claim and they'll just kind of tell a story and then they'll move on to
the next claim.
Or if they're real logical, they'll make a claim and they'll accompany the claim with facts.
And they forget the story and they forget the application.
But if I studied your talks, I know what I would find.
Here's what I would find.
This would be your cadence.
And it's the cadence of almost every high-level keynote speaker, whether they know it or not.
They make a claim.
They back their claim with facts.
So for the logical people in the room, they can go, okay, that person studied that subject.
They know what they're talking about.
I get that.
they tell a story which brings that claim to life, makes people feel a certain way, right?
We don't always remember what somebody said.
We do remember the way it made them feel.
And then we make it about them.
So the four step is application.
Here's what I want you to do.
Hey, with what I just shared, here's how it applies to you.
Here's what I want you to think about.
Here's the action that I want you to take.
So you're so good about that.
You'll make a claim.
You'll back it with facts.
You'll tell a story and you'll offer application.
It doesn't always happen in that perfect sort of cadence, but if you listen to a good, gifted, strong,
effective communicator, you'll pick up on all four of those elements in their communication.
So those are just two things that I'm learning about my work and, you know, the world of public
communication.
Totally agree.
And I love what you just said, make it about them.
That's the biggest miss that I see with most people.
I've done it a number of times, right?
You get caught up in your own story and you're excited.
to tell it, right? And you're passionate about something. And that is an epic fail, always putting
ourselves in the shoes of the audience and trying to see it through that lens and how are we adding
value to them. It's important because of them, not because of us. Right. So that's really,
really important. To your first point, in regards to this idea of connection, I have always done that.
And one of the things that I do very often is I lead with a story about how my feet stink.
because of how I look, people often think that I'm quote unquote perfect, which of course
nobody is perfect, myself included. And so I lead with that because it literally makes people's
jaws drop their shock. No one's expecting me to say that. And it's really been incredibly
powerful and successful until you set me up on blind date with somebody and they went to my website
and watched that footage. And that was literally our first conversation after we met. So
little backfire there. If you are going to be super bold.
or we'll make sure to only put the right content on your website if you are dating. Okay. Now,
you've built an incredible business that I am in awe. And looking at the roster of the coaches
that you have on your team, they're incredible superstars. How did that all come to be?
How are you leading these people? How are you attracting these people into your life?
Well, I wanted to do that right away. So when my wife and I started a business, I was like,
okay, we're going to build a big team. We're going to be this super mega force for good.
and then I learned that it doesn't happen that way,
and you have to start by blooming where you're planted.
And so I had to first build a coaching business on my own.
And so I had individual coaching clients,
and I did one-on-one coaching and group coaching.
And I quickly figured out that I didn't have the time to scale the business.
And so we hired my brother and then we hired the next person.
We hired a person after that.
I think we're at like 14 right now to date coaches on our platform.
And so it's really been a function of just demand, right?
And need.
And so we continue to add people.
And when we add people, here's what I'd say.
We want to add people who have great values.
Again, back to the who over the do.
I'm not always thinking about what does somebody do and what's their subject matter expertise.
I want to make sure that we are aligned in terms of our values.
If somebody's going to go out and represent me in the marketplace, I want to know that
they're a good person who has character, who has integrity, they're going to follow through,
they're going to honor their commitments.
But I would say this.
In the beginning, I had destination addiction.
and I wanted to be the person who had the big team with the big platform and the big website.
And I skipped some steps.
And honestly, it was my wife slowing me down to say, you're not even good enough on your own.
Like, you need to work on that for a bit before we add two, three, four, five people.
So what I've learned inside of that is this whole idea of bloom where you're planted.
You might be a visionary.
You might want to go take on the world.
And that's awesome.
God's put that in you.
So if that's you, that's great.
But get around some people who are not impressed by you.
who are going to be real and candid with you.
That's my wife.
And she's always kind of pulling me back.
Because I would live in the clouds.
You know that about me, Heather.
If it were up to me, I'm a visionary.
I would just live in the clouds all day long.
And my wife is like the execution person, right?
Yeah, that's us.
We're visionary.
And my wife is a person that's like, hey, hold on, not so fast.
There's more work to be done here.
You need to bloom where you're planted.
We will get there.
But you need to make sure you are dominating in this space
and that your house is clean first before you go try to help somebody else with theirs.
And so we built a great team by God's grace and we love the people that we get to work with.
It's a good, it's been a great way to go to business and go to market.
And I think we've been able to help a lot of people.
So it's been fun.
Oh my gosh.
It's so impressive.
Every time I meet someone else on your team, whether through you or just randomly, I'm
always blown away.
How do you think you're attracting those type of people to you or what do you do to recruit
people like that?
I've never really asked someone to be on our team.
And I think that's part of the magic.
is more often than not, somebody's asking me about the team
and we're trying to help them find another opportunity.
So I want people who are really interested.
They're invested.
They want to be a part of things.
They're looking for the next opportunity,
but they're also super talented.
And so I've also just learned that,
I think about building a company in general is like,
I want to build a brand and I want to build a company
that other people want to be a part of.
I don't want to have to go out and advertise.
Because if I'm advertising, if I'm talking about like, hey, we're hiring.
These are in my space in the lane that I run in, I will get some people who are probably not super talented or just maybe aren't experienced or ready for the work.
So the honest answer is every one of the connections and every one of the coaches that's on our platform has been a result of authentic friendship, relationship, which is both good and bad.
Sometimes it's weird to do business with people that you're friends with.
But they're all people that we just care about that are rock stars at what they do.
They're mega talented.
and we trust them. At the end of the day, they've got good values and they want to be a part of our deal.
So one of the things that I think of up front in any time that I'm having like a bad day and I reach out to and need to talk to you and you talk me off the ledge,
faith always comes up in the conversation. So I was hoping you could share the role in which faith has played in your life and how it's impacted you.
So it's been everything to me, really. I'll share I had a really unique experience of 27 years old that really helped me shape
my faith. I grew up in the church, and so I had a mom and dad that loved me well. And I thought I understood
what it was like to have a personal relationship in my faith. And for me, I'm Christian. That's how I
identify. So Jesus is my savior. And I thought I understood that at a young age. But he taught me a lot
through tremendous brokenness. At 27 years old, I lost my job. And when I lost my job, I also lost all my
money. So I was fired from a financial services company. There were a couple of reasons for that fallout.
but the main one was there was a person on my team who took a test on my behalf, unbeknownst to me,
but as a leader, I failed to report it.
And because I failed to report it, I was terminated.
And I'll just tell you for a long time, Heather, I lived in this world of life, that was unfair,
totally unjust.
I know you and I have sort of a similar story that way.
We've talked about that a little bit.
And it cost me a lot because I was involved in some real estate deals that were tied in a very
unwise way to my employment status. So when I lost my job, I lost future income, but I also lost
basically all of my net worth because I was involved in these deals. So stood on the door of bankruptcy,
thought I was going to go bankrupt and have to file bankruptcy. I'm a 27-year-old guy who finds, like,
all of his security in achievement, accomplishment, my bank account, my reputation. Well, all of that
was taken away. Literally, bank account goes to zero. In fact, I actually went into huge debt.
Thought I was going to have to file bankruptcy. Some people helped me so I didn't.
My reputation, the company sent out a company-wide email with my name on it that said I got
terminated. It's a Fortune 100 company. So that hurt was very public. Everybody knew what had
happened to me. And I lost all this future income. So I don't know what the big number is.
It'd be hard to quantify. It was probably north of $20 million that I lost as a result of my
bad decision, right? And in my brokenness, in that season, God did his best work. For sure,
unequivocally without question. He did his best work in my life. And I think he had to take me to a
place where I could rely on him and lean on him to get that work done. And for the first time,
I started asking questions like, okay, what do I want my life to be about? And what am I missing?
And what's the feedback that I need to listen to that I've been rejecting? I started to have
greater compassion and greater empathy. I was released from some of my pride and my ego, not
because of my own discipline, but because I was forced to be released of that. I'm still working on
that, but God really dealt with that. And here's the coolest thing I think, because you've been
through some stuff too. Here's what happens when we go through a broken season, because there's
somebody that's broken right now. We want to reconnect that vein. So if you were affected or something
happened to you relationally, I've been there, right? And you so desperately want that vein to be
reconnected. Okay. So this was taken away. I want a new relationship to fix that.
that void in my life. Or for me, it was my professional life and my financial life, right? It was
literally destroyed and obliterated. And I wanted so desperately for God to reconnect my professional
veins, right? Like, would you please put it back together and I'll find the new opportunity?
And I was so ready for him to do that. I'm like, okay, God, you took this away from me. So I'll
find the next industry and the new opportunity and I'll go do that other thing. Turns out I actually
ended up back in financial services. The same company rehired me. So it was this beautiful story of, you know,
redemption and that was great. But what I didn't expect was for God to do what he did in my
brokenness, which is introduced me to my now wife, Ashley, who had two kids from a previous
marriage. And I was not ready to become a husband or to become a father, given my pride,
given my ego, given all of the idolatry and the horribly unwise decisions that I was making.
And none of my decisions were like immoral or unethical, but they were just bad decisions.
Like it was all about me.
I wanted people to know that I was great and I was successful and I found all of my identity
in those things.
And so today I get to say that sometimes God's preparation is packaged is pain.
You go through some really hard stuff, but he prepares you for a new season.
But the greatest gift that he gave me is the reminder that he is in control and I am not.
and he's on the throne and I am not.
And I learned that he's the authority of my life.
He is my hope.
He's everlasting.
And I felt that clear as day.
And I can't even explain it.
But I remember, like, weeping in my little apartment in Minneapolis, Minnesota, just
completely broken.
I moved to a city where I didn't know anybody.
And it was like a true fall from grace.
And I remember feeling his love and, like, experiencing him in a way that I never had.
And I can say now with our three daughters and my wife, like, that's,
God at work and he had to take me through the desert before I could climb back onto the mountain.
And so I know somebody listening has had that similar experience or maybe somebody's going
through that right now. But gosh, dang it, God is good. And if you're in a dark place,
you haven't been buried, you've been planted. And there's more for you. There's another season
ahead. And he wants to use that thing that hurt you for good. And I know that you have a similar
story. So I think we share that in common. The details are different. But you're dominating. You're
on a mountaintop. You've been through some stuff. There's some things that happened to you that were
unfair. And I'm proud of you as my friend. I'm proud of Heather Monaghan for the way that you've
responded. And people say this, before I turn it back to you, this drives me crazy. People say,
well, adversity builds character. Okay, that's bullshit. No, it doesn't. Adversity builds character
if you allow it to. So it's still a choice. Like, it is a choice to fail forward. It's a choice to say,
I'm going to use this for good. I'm going to get back up on my feet with the help of others.
and by God's grace, and I'm going to move forward in this life.
And you've done that.
So I'm proud of you for that.
But that was a long way to answer a short question about faith.
But I learned so much in that season.
And that's my faith journey and my faith story.
For anyone listening, check out John Gordon's book, The Garden.
If you're questioning anything about faith, I had a really good friend of mine the other
day, say to me, have you read that book yet?
And you know, I love John.
I'm a fan of John.
I have all John's books.
I never read it, right?
And so I just jumped into it.
And it's such, just anyone who's questioning faith or wondering about it, like just go listen to this
audiobook.
It's really going to help, it's going to help bring some clarity to you and bring you closer to God,
which is amazing.
And truly, foundationally, I truly believe that confidence, when built on your relationship with God
is unbreakable and will take you to heights and levels that you could have never fathom
otherwise.
So I just appreciate you being really candid about that, Jordan.
And to the idea of you being candid and to the idea of you being vulnerable, I wanted to get to one last topic before I let you go. I'm respectful of your time. The clock is counting down. You know, one of the things about you that's so great is you are incredibly humble. One of the things that's not so great about you is that you're incredibly humble. And when I see talent in people and I see the magic that you have within you, I want to put your face on Times Square and, you, you
New York City and like blow you up larger than life. And we've had conversations about this. And you shared
that there's trepidation around appearing a certain way, which I totally get. However, that never stops me.
I frankly could care less what anyone else thinks about me. I know that I'm out here in the world doing good, that I'm on my mission and I'm not letting anyone to turn me.
However, your point is when I hear from so many listeners, I hear from so many people that, hey, how do you dial that light up when people are going to judge?
you and you might be misread. So talk to me about where you're at in that journey and how you're
going to move forward. So you've helped me with that. So thank you for the way that you have
called me upward and called me out. And I think I'm still very much a work in progress. I think
some of that too is like because I went through that journey as a as a prideful young man
who was full of ego and arrogance, I think I'm scared to be that person again. And so I think sometimes
I associate being bold or courageous with being prideful and arrogant. And those are two very different
things. So I'm glad we're having this conversation. And I would say this, here's what I'm learning.
To the person who's denying their future or denying their gifts, here's what I'd say.
Who in the hell do you think you are? That's what I feel like God is telling me, right? Because when
somebody says, hey, Jordan, job well done, or you're awesome or good job or I see something in you,
for me to deny that, for me to be like, oh, gosh, I'm not that great or, you know, I don't know,
like, that insinuates that I did something to earn it.
Because if I was truly in tune with the ways in which God gave me gifts, and I understood
that it was just that, it was a gift, then I should be able to receive the compliment.
Because here's what I've learned.
They're not really complimenting me.
They don't know me.
So if I'm on a stage and I get some standing ovation or I walk off and people tell me that
they're great, and I'm like, yeah, I'm pretty good.
What a false sense of security and identity.
They don't know anything about me.
They just heard me give a 20 minute speech and they're applauding the speech.
They're not applauding me.
They're applauding the gift inside of me.
That's what they're admiring.
So at the end of the day, I think you and I need to be able to objectively say,
okay, listen, they're not in love with me.
They don't even know me.
What they're admiring, what they're excited about is the gift inside of me.
And if it is a gift, then I should be able to receive the compliment and say,
thank you.
It's a gift.
And I appreciate that.
maybe you don't say it's a gift, but that's kind of your posture, right? That's your energy.
And so you're helping me with that. You're reminding me that, Jordan, it's okay to attack your future
with great confidence because, listen, God gave you a gift. And he asked you to steward that gift.
And stewarding that gift well means that you don't play small. You play big. And you step out
courageously and boldly. And there's a difference between pride and confidence. And I think I'm still
learning, you know, what that different. And let me just say this, you're helping people with that
gap all day, every day. Like, I know that's what you've committed your life's work to. And so
I want to encourage you down that path because the work that you do, Heather, on that subject matter
is so crazy important. Because there's people like me who probably think I kind of have that figured out.
I'm like, no, I get confidence. I understand all that. Well, clearly I don't or we wouldn't be having
that conversation. So you've helped me with that. And I want our listeners to know that. Just in a moment of
vulnerability. I'm just sharing that, that I'm still on that journey of figuring out what true
confidence is, is all about. It's sneaky, you know, and for me, there's two things I'll say to
this. Anyone listening to struggles with this, I remember the first time I gave a very vulnerable
speech where I shared that I had grown up poor, I shared that it was a single mother,
you know, a bunch of challenges. And when I got off that stage, I received hundreds of DMs from people
saying to me, I never knew you grew up poor. Oh my gosh, Heather, you made it. I can't
to. Oh my gosh, I never knew you were a single mother. I'm a single mother too. You just opened my eyes
to what's possible for me. And I almost didn't give that speech because I thought people are going to
think I'm ragging that I'm up here that I'm so great. I was seeing it through a different lens.
And so that day changed the way I saw. I was saying, stop making it about me. Who cares if I'm
going to feel bad about it. I actually can help somebody else. So I stopped making it about me and I
started making it about the audience, right? That was pivot number one. Pivot number two is whenever I'm
taking a big stage, I always ask God to give me the words. I always ask God to speak through me.
I always have a conversation with God before I'm going to go on that stage and I say use me to bring
your message to light. And I know that he is. And when you have that faith and you walk out there,
it is your job to reach millions, not hundreds. So then I'm always asking God, how can we reach
millions of people together? The more people we can reach more. People we can heal, the more we can
bring your work to life. When you start flipping the way that you're seeing it, then
you can have your life's impact in such a bigger and more powerful way.
And shining your light is always going to make the world a better and brighter place.
And I'm here for it.
So I just want you to know, I'm encouraging you.
I want your face in Times Square.
I may actually get a billboard at some point.
And I can't wait to see you continue to grow and blossom and do the amazing work that you're doing.
And I'm just blessed and grateful that you're in my life.
Well, right back at you.
You have been just an awesome source of encouragement, of energy, of support.
I'm so grateful that David Nurse connected us.
So shout out to David.
Shout out to David Nurse.
He's the best.
He is such a great connector just like you.
But really, I mean that.
Like you just consistently show up as a positive encouragement in my life.
Every text, every call, connection, opportunity, just grateful for it.
And to be on a show that I've listened to for a long time is also a gift.
So thanks for having me.
I'm a fan of yours.
And I think we have a lot of work to do and a lot of life ahead of us.
And just really excited to do that with you and be your friend.
So thanks for having me.
All right, guys, if you want a blessing in your life, you need to follow Jordan Montgomery.
You need to subscribe to his podcast.
Jordan, where can they find out more about you?
Where can they get in contact with you and how can they connect?
So we do a lot via social media more on Instagram than other platforms.
You've challenged me on that.
On Instagram, Jordan and Montgomery, we're on LinkedIn, Facebook, Twitter.
You can also go to our website, Montgomerycompanies.
com.
And I'll say this.
If somebody listening has a question, a thought, if you want to reach out, send me a
DM.
I will respond to all of them myself to the extent that I can.
It might not be in perfect timing, but I will get back to you.
I'd love to hear from you.
We'd love to be helpful.
Would love to be a source of energy or positivity.
Or send me an email, Jordan at Montgomery Companies.com.
We'd love to connect with anybody listening.
All right.
Don't miss this opportunity.
Definitely check out the podcast.
It's amazing.
And really be mindful about the people you're pulling into your life and who you're
spending time with Jordan's one of those people that you definitely want by your side. Follow,
subscribe, and check them out. Until next week, me and Jordan will be creating our confidence and
turning our lights up. So I hope you all are too. Catch you then.
Come on this journey with me.
