Creating Confidence with Heather Monahan - #262: Start TODAY, With Heather!
Episode Date: October 19, 2022In This Episode You Will Learn About: Leaving your insecurities behind you Taking action NOW Why timing is everything Leaving a positive impact Resources: Overcome Your Villains is Avai...lable NOW! Order here: https://overcomeyourvillains.com If you haven't yet, get my first book Confidence Creator Show Notes: Waiting is NOT the answer. Done will always be better than perfect! So go after what excites you, and stay open to the possibility that ANYTHING CAN HAPPEN! When you take action, even if it’s messy, you’re putting yourself out there and adding value to others’ lives as well! Try letting go of your doubts today! You never know what’s waiting for you around the corner.
Transcript
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I'm on this journey with me.
Each week when you join me, we are going to chase down our goals.
We'll overcome adversity and set you up for a better tomorrow.
I'm ready for my close-up.
Hi and welcome back.
I'm so glad you're back here with me this week.
Okay, so when I'm asked a question, a multitude of times, I take that as a sign.
I should share the feedback, the answer with you on the podcast.
So recently, I've received so many DMs asking me how to start a podcast, how to land big guests.
How did you get Gary Vaynerchuk?
How did you get Sarah Blakely?
So I keep getting these questions.
First and foremost, this is sort of interesting.
I don't really think of it, like, how do you start a podcast or how do you start a business or how do you make a career change?
All those things are essentially the same, right?
I mean, there can be some nuances in regards to when you launch a podcast, should you?
You just do solo episodes, aka what we're doing right now?
Or what category do you want to be in in Apple Podcast?
There are some nuances that are unique.
It's same thing with starting your own business.
You know, what product or service are you going to sell?
What problem do you solve?
Right.
There are unique questions you're going to ask around it.
But here's the reality.
And this is what the majority of people struggle with.
Just do it.
Waiting is not the answer.
Done will always be better than perfect.
take messy action. And I've just seen so many people wait so long. It's that analysis of paralysis,
right? You just, you want it to be the perfect time, the perfect conditions. Oh, the marketplace isn't right.
All of that is BS excuses. And I get it. Listen, for over a decade, I was not happy, not living my best life,
not living up to my potential in a job, but I was afraid to leave. I was afraid to pull the trigger.
I couldn't see what was on the other side of that gap.
If I'm going to leap, well, what's out there?
I had no idea.
And because I couldn't see it with clarity, I thought I couldn't go.
I was wrong.
I think all the time now, if I had left corporate America and that job where I was not
treated well, I wasn't respected, and I allowed it to go on, if I had taken that leap
that I took five years ago now, could you imagine if I had taken that five years earlier?
I'd be light years ahead. I can't even imagine. So no matter what it is that you're thinking about in your
life, if you're always questioning if you should leave the relationship, if you're questioning
if you should leave the job, if you're questioning if you should invest in yourself, start the
podcast, start the business, whatever it may be, the answer is start now. There's never going to be
a perfect time. Take the messy action and go for it. Here's a quick story. When I first got fired,
one of the things I wanted to do was partner with a massive brand to give me that brand cachet that I felt like I had lost because I no longer had a massive company behind me anymore, right?
Which also, that's just all ego and BS, but it's what I needed at the time.
So anyhow, I ended up partnering with Perry Ellis International, which is a multi-billion dollar clothing brand.
And I felt like this is exactly the kind of partnership that I want that's going to give me that swag and presence.
and, you know, the PR teams were announcing it everywhere, and it made me feel really happy.
I felt like, okay, I'm back. That was fast. All right, way to go, Heather. However, to the point done is always better than perfect.
I pitched Perry Ellis on this clothing line that I wanted to launch together in partnership with them because they already have the clothing factory set up. I didn't. I knew what I wanted the messaging to be, the marketing.
I knew that I wanted to sell it on TV, on HSN.
I mean, I had so much of this business plan mapped out, and I was ready to hit the ground running,
but I needed someone who could actually manufacture the clothes.
And I wanted to bring great quality products to market.
Okay, so they needed some new revenue streams.
It seemed like a great partnership for months, about nine months.
We worked on the line.
We worked on the messaging.
We worked on some really unique strategies.
And we were ready to go to market.
I went to HSN, I got us the meeting. Bottom line is this, we did not get the deal. And that was a really
difficult no to take because we had worked so long on the product line nine months when I had just
lost my job, right? So I needed revenue and I was so fixated on this idea. Hasn't come to fruition yet
or didn't come to fruition the way that I thought it would, right? No can also be not right now.
So what I learned from that situation, why I'm glad I still just jumped in and did it, is I learned so much about HSN.
I learned so much about QVC selling products and services online.
I made so many contacts at QVC, at HSN, right?
And basically, here's where it led me.
Again, it hasn't come to fruition yet.
Listen, I believe the best is yet to come.
It's God's plan, not mine, right?
I have these ideas.
I have these senses in regards to, ooh, this is a great,
marketplace is ripe for it. I love that it solves a problem. It's within my community,
right? Like I get a feel for, okay, this could be amazing. It's right in line with my brand and
what I live and believe. And I get excited about things. I go for them. They don't always come
to fruition or happen, or they haven't yet. And it's about keeping your mind open to that
possibility. So to that end, I am continuing to work on different products and services. I still have
that vision for me. I've made such great contacts that I know I could tap at any point in time.
And they've taught me the key that I was missing when I was with Peri Ellis is their products
were too similar to stuff that they already had on the air. It wasn't unique enough. It wasn't
special enough. It wasn't different enough. And so Peri Ellis didn't want to change who they were,
right? They're a multi-billion dollar company. That's cool. I get it. But I'm a smaller company.
I can change and pivot fast, right? So take advantage of what's unique and different about you.
Perry Ellis is a massive company.
They can't pivot quickly.
I'm a smaller company.
I can pivot really fast.
Think in your mind, yeah, you might not be the multi-billion dollar
Goliath in your industry, but what's unique and different about you that you can leverage
to get yourself ahead?
The key is, in my opinion, done will always be better than perfect.
Move fast and break things.
You'll figure out solutions along the way that will direct you to where you're really supposed
to be going.
Maybe Perry Ellis wasn't my partner.
maybe somebody else is and maybe these new relationships that I've been forming along the way
are going to reveal who that right partner is. And when the timing's right, watch out. You know,
you can't connect the dots looking forward. You can only do it looking back and you've got to have
faith and belief in yourself. Okay, done will always be better than perfect. Move fast and break things.
Okay, so I want to get back to these questions I kept getting asked. And I'll start with the Gary Vaynerchuk
story if you haven't heard it before.
So people asked me, how did you land Gary Vaynerchuk for a guest?
That's incredible.
Yeah, it was incredible.
Number one, I got really clear on my intention.
I knew I was going to do it and I did not know how.
Story of my life, right?
But I had faith and commitment.
I was getting him as my first guest on the show.
So you need to get really clear.
What is your intention?
Get clarity around the goal.
Write it down and hold yourself accountable.
I started DMing Gary Vaynerchuk,
and I actually DMs him for a couple of years before I ever got a response back.
Then I got a response back and got blown off.
That's fine.
Part of sales, right?
Sales is a numbers game.
So I knew I had to keep pursuing and take a different angle or pursuit.
That's when I took out a Google Alert on Gary Vaynerchuk's name.
Now, if you have a target or someone you're going after that you want to have as a business partner
or want to pitch for an idea, take a Google alert out on that person.
It is brilliant.
Every morning when you wake up, you're going to have in your inbox what's going on in their life.
And so within a couple of weeks, I saw an announcement that Gary Vaynerchuk was launching a wine company with a partner.
And so I jumped on to that partner's name.
I saw he wasn't as well known as Gary Vaynerchuk.
So I figured he'll be easier to get to.
Then the next thing I did is I said, how can I add value to this person?
Right.
when we show up wanting to serve other people, people are going to be more open to
take in our calls, to wanting to hear from us, to wanting to be helped. So I sent a DM to his
partner on LinkedIn. And on LinkedIn, I have a presence, right? I've been showing up there for
years. You can tell them a real person. And if you look at my page, you can see the reviews of my
work, get reviews and recommendations of your work, and create content that showcases who you
really are, you know, not a fake persona so that people say, oh, yeah, that's a kind of person I'd
want to take a call from, right? So you got to do the work, invest in yourself, show up on these
platforms. And I shot this guy a note. I said, hey, I saw that you are partnering with Gary Vaynerchuk
to launch a wine brand. Just wanted to let you know. I've had tremendous success in business and
in marketing and media for the last two decades. But prior to that, I was actually in the wine business.
and launched a massive campaign for Gallo Winery and learned what to do and what not to do with an alcohol
launch.
If you want to hear some of my hacks so that you don't have to make mistakes I made, I'd be happy to jump on a quick call and share them with you.
Add value.
How can I help this person solve a problem or gain information they may need?
He responded right away.
Oh my gosh, I would love to.
Thank you, you know, what day works this week.
We jumped on a call. We were on a call for over an hour. And at the end, you know, I was sharing with him everything that I had done wrong, everything that I had learned and trying to give him some, you know, a step up or a boost of help. And in the end, the last thing he said to me was, thank you so much. How can I ever repay you? If there's ever anything I can do for you, don't hesitate to ask, consider it done. And I said, oh my gosh, it's so funny you say that. But I'm launching my part.
podcast, and I really want to have Gary Vaynerchuk, your partner as my first guest. Can you
make that happen? And he started laughing, and then he did. So you never know, I didn't know that
he would offer that to me, right, but I just know that I'm going to be nowhere if I do nothing.
I'd rather go out, put my best foot forward, and find ways to help people solve their problems,
help add value to them, and then start building a relationship from there. You never know how quickly
that could turn into something, an open door to exactly what it is that you're trying to accomplish,
which, you know, for me was to get to Gary. And then when I was at the end of my interview on my show
with Gary Vaynerchuk, I asked, hey, Gary, do you think that you would want to have me as a
guest on your show? I believe I can add value to your audience by ABC and D. I on the spot showed up
and talked about how I could add value to his audience and I went for the close. And he said yes.
and inevitably he had me on his show too. So you've got to be willing to take those risks.
You've got to be willing to show up. You've got to do the work, right? Establish your brand,
create the content, get the reviews and recommendations, show who you are, showcase your brand,
your persona, and allow people to get to know you before they actually meet you. And that can
invite opportunity in as well. Okay, that is how I landed Gary Vaynerchuk, which I'm super
grateful. He was my first guest, go big or go home. If you want to laugh,
go back and listen to that episode, it was in 2019, I definitely was nervous. We'll just leave it
at that. Of course, I was nervous, but done will always be better than perfect. I'm so glad I did
it. I'm so glad he was my first guest. I'm super proud of that. When you want more, start your
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how did I get Sarah Blakely on the show?
She is really hard to get, right?
Both Sarah Blakely and Gary Vaynerchuk charge six plus figures to do speeches anywhere.
I mean, they're just, they're really hard to get to.
And interestingly enough, Sarah Blakely is a very different story.
So I have a very great friend, Scott McGregor, who if you're listening, shout out to you,
a ride or die, incredible person who has helped me so much.
I try to repay him in any and every way I can because he's just an incredible person,
doing great work, does so much work for charity, just a wonderful person.
He's a give-back guy, my kind of people.
Okay, so anytime you're giving back, you know, again, you're creating that flow of other good
people to come to you and more good things to happen.
So leading with positivity, leading with giving to others.
Anyhow, Scott and I got to know each other when he was creating.
creating a book for charity. I wrote a chapter for him. I was supporting him. He was supporting me.
We became really good friends. At some point when he heard I was launching my podcast, he said,
well, give me a list of ideal podcast guests you want to have on. And I thought, oh my gosh,
Sarah Blakely, definitely, right? Like I put this huge list together. And he said, you know what?
I actually know Jesse Itzler and I know Sarah Blakely. Maybe there's a chance there.
I can't promise anything, but maybe you never know.
It's worth trying, right?
So again, I just put it out there who I was going after.
He said, well, maybe this is one I could help with.
Let's see what happens.
You know, and just kind of leave it there.
Well, for a while, nothing happened.
And then one day he called me and he said, you know what I was thinking?
I just had a call with Jesse's partner, his business partner.
I could put you in touch with him.
And who knows what can come from that conversation.
At least it's something that might open up a door.
So I said, great.
So he sets up a call for me with Jesse's business partner.
partner. Gosh, this is so roundabout the way that things come together. It's incredible,
serendipitous. And I had no idea if I'd ever, you know, get to her or get her on my show.
So I take the call. First thing I ask is, how can I add value, right? So we get on the phone,
I said, listen, tell me how I can be of assistance help to you, support you in any way.
He starts telling me about this new initiative that they have, two new business initiatives.
And he was wondering if I could support it somehow, you know, through social media. I had
my podcast, the time through my podcast, you know, what were some of the ideas? How could I add value
to help support him? So I went through a bunch of different ideas that I had, and I actually had
just met someone who in that space was, you know, doing some support work that I thought could
add value. I said, I'll make an intro there, right? I was just talking about how can I add value
to him? Always see things through that lens. How can we help others? And when you see through that
lens first, you are just destined to have good things happen. Maybe not on that call, maybe not in
that one exchange, but at some point, good's going to come back to you. Keep leading with good.
Keep adding value to others. So at the end of that call, he says to me, I heard that you wanted to get
Sarah and Jesse on your show, and I got to be honest with you. Sarah, absolutely not. You can't.
And Jesse, he really doesn't want to do podcasts much anymore. He's too busy. I said, I totally get it.
You know, no problem. I just appreciate that, you know, you took the call and whatnot. So, you know,
I'm kind of getting a no at that point. We end up staying on the phone a little bit longer.
Anyhow, he says, all right, can you make that intro to that other guy and contact you have?
Sure, no problem. Appreciate it. Let's see where this goes in the future. And any way I can help you,
he had an event coming up. You know, I said, let me know if I can support that. Whatever,
move on. Okay. So the next day I get a message from him after I make the intro and he sends me text,
hey, I think I might be able to get Jesse to do your show. However, there's only a couple of dates and it's not for a
couple of months. And I said, no problem, right? This is out of left field. Okay, no problem. Whatever it is,
I'll make it work. So he connects me to Jesse's assistant who gives me a couple of dates. I pick one
and I say, okay, I want to fly to Atlanta to interview him. She says no. He only does Zoom
interviews. Okay, I'll take what I can get. No problem. Again, not fighting it. Make it easy.
Make it so simple that people want to work with you, want to be in business with you. So the day of
the interview, Jesse's internet kept going out. Yes, these people are billionaires with a B. And for
whatever reason, serendipitous universe, something else, a higher power is at work here. The internet
kept going out. So finally, I get a text message. It was from Jesse. I didn't know. I thought it was
from the assistant, says, listen, this is ridiculous and embarrassing. My internet keeps going out.
I'm sorry to have wasted your time, but it doesn't look like we're going to be able to do the show.
And I said, well, how about I jump on a plane and fly to Atlanta?
It's only 45 minutes flight from Miami.
And he said, would you really do that?
I said, yeah, of course I would.
Oh, my gosh.
It would be amazing.
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Don't forget, my goal in the first place was to be face-to-face because I always want to be
face-to-face with people.
That's where the magic happens.
That's where opportunity happens.
That's where you can really move the needle.
So he says, okay, how about next week?
You know, today won't work, but what about next week?
I said, sure, give me the day, time.
I'll be there.
My best friends live in Atlanta.
It's easy for me.
No problem.
So I fly up the next week.
I go to his house.
I interview him.
We have such a great time.
He's so nice, was so welcoming, just such a cool guy.
He mentioned that he liked my microphone.
So as soon as I left, I bought him a microphone,
overnighted it to him with a thank you note.
I'm always thinking, how can I make people feel?
feel special and act on the things that are important to them. And I just want to separate myself,
right, and be thoughtful. And so when he received it, he sent me a text. He said, hey,
thanks so much for that. That was really thoughtful of you. Appreciate it. If there's ever any way
I can help you, let me know. So I said, thank you. I did not ask about trying to get Sarah for
my show. I thought that might be a little bit much coming in a little hot with another ask
right after I got him to do my show. Wouldn't you know literally a couple of
a couple of weeks later, my very good friend Scott McGregor calls me and he says, you're not going to
believe this, but a sales and marketing conference is looking for someone to interview Sarah,
Blakely, and Jesse Idsler live on stage in front of thousands of people. And I was just talking to
the event coordinator and your name came up because you already know Jesse. I had just met Jesse.
We had hit it off. I had just promoted him on my show. So I was trying to do things to help support him.
And we had, you know, just gotten along during the interview.
Super great guy, amazing entrepreneur, father, husband, great person.
Anyhow, so cut to, I end up getting hired to interview him and his wife live on stage.
And I had so many meetings with Sarah's team.
And it was a lot going into it, right?
And so I really wanted everything to go flawlessly.
Of course, it didn't.
There was tons of problems and issues.
but we had such a great time.
And the event coordinator was so happy with how our interview went that I went up to her that day of, Strike While the Iron's Hot.
And I said, will you allow me to repurpose this content on my podcast?
It will give you reach.
I will promote the heck out of your event.
I will help you sell tickets for next year.
How can I add value to you?
And she said, yes, I'll sign the release and let you repurpose your interview on your show.
I'll tell you, you know, there's so many different ways to try to just keep adding value to people and just wonder, okay, I'm going to keep adding value.
I'll ask for what I want.
When I see the opportunity, I might not always get it in the moment.
I'm going to have that clear intention.
I'm going to keep showing up and adding value and keep knocking on different doors.
And eventually, you know, that hope is that those dots end up connecting.
We don't know how they always will.
But in the end, most of the time, they do.
And if they don't, it wasn't really meant for us.
Okay, so those are a few examples. Oh, here's another one. Ryan Surnt was another big name guest, millions of followers. This one happened so easily. So the Sarah Blakely one was definitely a bigger roundabout way, way more work, time, effort, etc. The Gary Vaynerchuk won, same thing. Like that did not happen overnight. That took a while, actually, a couple of years to come to fruition. The Ryan Sourhant one, though, you never know. I had a friend who was interested.
reviewing him for his podcast. And when he was about to get off his podcast interview with Ryan,
he said, you know what? My friend has a really big show. Would you want to do her show? It's
called Creating Confidence with Heather Monty. And he just asked for me. I popped in his mind.
And he said, sure, no problem. Put her in touch with my assistant and I'll go ahead and do it.
So they had just hit it off and my friend offered up this opportunity. I hadn't asked him.
I didn't have an intention to get this guy on the show. But we had talked before about, you know,
the kind of guess I was looking for. So my point to this is there's going to be times where things
are a struggle and doesn't seem like they're lining up the way that you had hoped. And that's
okay. And we keep moving forward with our vision and our work, right, and adding value and doing the
next right thing. And then there's times things just fall in your lap. Such a good example of this
in my life recently is when I got the call from Dr. Phil's producer, right? I was in the middle of my
move. It was the worst time ever for me, not like there's ever a perfect time. And I just randomly
got a bunch of DMs on social media saying, we need to have you on the show. Can you be here next week?
And again, the timing was far from perfect. I was in the middle of a move, my first move in 17 years.
But, you know, I thought this is a once in a lifetime opportunity. It can help me reach a broader,
larger audience. And if it's going to help one person, I need to be there. I've got to
I've got to show up and make that happen, right?
So it seemed like that just happened out of left field.
Cut to when I got to know the producer better, which she's amazing.
And we were talking.
She explained it was my TED talk that sold her on me.
So it wasn't that I just brandily popped into this woman's head and, you know, fairies were just flying all around.
But back in the end of 2019, I had worked incredibly hard on my 10-minute TED talk.
and somehow it was served up to her through the YouTube algorithm somehow.
So I don't know how that happened, but this is one of those situations where we're going back to 2019.
And really we're going back from beyond that because I have been speaking for years before I took that TED stage, right?
I've been speaking for about 20 years in corporate America.
So, I mean, this road to get to the Dr. Phil show might look like it was seamless and just miraculous.
list, but it really wasn't. It was years of me working on my speaking craft and then landing the
TEDx talk and then the TEDx talk getting promoted to TED and then somehow an algorithm serving it to
the producer at Dr. Phil. So there isn't always rhyme or reason, but putting the hard work in does
pay off. It just might not pay off in the moment. I remember at the end of 2019, my TEDx talk
came out the night before Thanksgiving, 2019, and feeling so deflated because nothing massive
happened. I thought overnight I would have millions of views. Like in my mind, this is how it was
going to go down and millions of opportunities. And it just didn't really happen. And in fact,
a lot of the people in the speaking business, they weren't excited about my TEDx talk because they thought
I should have done one on sales and sales leadership so that they could go out and sell it to corporate
America. I did it around the elephant in the room that no one talks about women in the workplace
bullying other women. And it was something that was really passionate to me and I wanted to be different,
unique. I can do a million talks about sales and sales leadership, but this one story was something
that was different, right? Nobody's talking about that. And I want to show up and be unique and
different. And taking those kinds of risk doesn't always pay. So after the talk came out, I was a little
discouraged, right? I was thinking, oh my gosh, this kind of stinks that I, maybe I should,
I started wondering, should I have done it differently? And here I am today, you know,
almost three years later. I'm so grateful that I move forward with my truth, that I took the risk
on being different and not showing up vanilla like everybody else. So my message to you today is
you might not always see the payoff right when you put the work in, but have faith that those
thoughts are going to connect that things will come together. And the more you keep adding value
showing up is that real true version of yourself, regardless of what anybody else thinks or says,
things are going to start working out for you. They are going to come together for you. And you're
going to keep going bigger. You're going to capitalize on that momentum and allow it to launch
you forward towards your goals. Well, that's my hope for you anyways. And all of that is about
creating confidence within yourself, believing yourself, and taking the risk.
Because so many of us freeze up and are afraid because we want it done perfectly.
We don't know if the timing is right.
Well, I don't either, but I know I'm never getting back right now.
So that's why I'm going for it.
That's why I'm glad I took the flight to L.A. to do the Dr. Phil show, even though I had complete chaos going on in my life.
It wasn't easy, but it was worth it.
And I've received so many beautiful DMs from people from that message.
So, you know, keep leading as that real version of you.
Yes, it's not always easy.
Yes, there's going to be work that needs to go into it.
But I believe in you.
I believe that the best is yet to come for you.
And you've got to keep moving forward, taking chances, and doubling down on you.
If you like this episode, please share it on social media.
Tag me.
And when you do, I'm going to re-post it.
I'm going to appreciate it so much because no one succeeds alone, including this girl.
right here. Until next week, keep creating your confidence. You know I will be.
