Creating Confidence with Heather Monahan - #284: How To Start The New Year Off RIGHT, With Heather!

Episode Date: January 4, 2023

In This Episode You Will Learn About:  Appreciating your growth   Opening up your mind to the possibilities out there   Making small changes for a BIG impact  Letting go of what is holding you back  Resources: Overcome Your Villains is Available NOW! Order here: https://overcomeyourvillains.com  If you haven't yet, get my first book Confidence Creator Order my Soul Sayings Show Notes:  Happy New Year! The first thing I like to do at the start of the year is look back and reflect on my life over the past year to see where I’ve grown and where I’d like to grow more! There is SO much to come in the future, that you truly never know what is possible. It’s time to let go of any negativity that is holding you back and start this year with a clean, positive slate! P.S If you haven't already, go listen to Tania Lester’s episode on energy healing to get your mind right for 2023.  

I'm on this journey with me. Each week when you join me, we are going to chase down our goals. We'll overcome adversity and set you up for a better tomorrow. I'm ready for my close-up. Hi, and welcome back. I'm so glad you're back here with me this week. First of all, happy New Year. I hope your New Year is off to an amazing start.

And if it's not, it's going to be by the end of this show, because we are going to flip the script on that today. Okay, I know a lot of people. don't get that hyped about the new year, which I completely understand, right? Everyone has different perspectives. I, on the other hand, believe it's such an amazing opportunity to appreciate your growth over the last year, appreciate the miracles that have occurred in your life, and leverage those for the potential of what is to come in this new year, 2003. I'm so excited about it. I'm so grateful that you're here with me. I can't even put it into words.

Okay. So, first of all, the first thing that I do is I look back on the past year and I know I've shared this with you a couple of times. I can't tell you how much better my life is today than it was one year ago. One year ago today. And I'm sharing this with you so you see the potential within your life of how fast things can change. I was in an awful court case, which is really negative and draining. and when your energy is low and you're surrounded with fighting and negativity, there's no doubt you're going to block opportunity from your life. I learned this the hard way by working side by side with a woman who hated me for years. Things were so much tougher in the normal day to day. I had to work so much harder. I had to put so much blood, sweat, and tears into everything,

basically to compensate for all that negative space that was around me. The minute that woman fired me, but I actually fired her from my life. You know, opportunities started coming to me. So clearing that negativity. And again, I had to go through the court case. It was it was the right thing to do. And now that I'm on the other side of it, I'm glad I went through it. But that window of time stunk, right? It's not fun. And it doesn't feel like you're living your best life. However, you need to have boundaries in your life stand up for yourself, own your voice, even when it's difficult. And it did pass. So it was worth it, although it was really trying. So I had run into a good friend of mine about a year ago right now, literally right now, it was January. And she saw that I had low energy. I was not in my positive,

upbeat space that I typically am. She's known me for a long time. And she said to me, something's off with you. You're not right, right? She felt this negative energy that I had surrounding me, and I was just discouraged and down. So she sent me to an energy healer. If you haven't listened to that episode, go back and listen to the Tanya Lester episode. Again, I get it's not for everybody. It worked incredibly well for me. I'm just going to let you know. Game changer for me. I ended up after seeing that energy healer, I think it was one week later, my court case was finalized. I received a note from my ex that basically said, let's finalize this thing, let's get it done with and put it behind us. And it was shocking to me because I was not getting any signs of that prior to seeing the

energy healer. So that was a huge shift which opened my mind to the possibility of how I never thought that case was going to end so quickly and easily at the end. And it did. It was like an 11th hour miracle. And so that started me down the path of believing, you know, things don't have to go in a linear way the way I think they need to go. Miracles can happen any day if you're open to receiving them and believing that. And so I started leveraging that one situation as an indicator of what could come from me in the year 2022. This was January 2022. So the next thing I did is I went home and I purged so much from my old condo. By the way, I've moved since then. I don't live there anymore yet again another miracle. So I had lived in the same place for 17 years and I had not done

like a thorough purging. If you have not purged paperwork, clothing, you know, kids, toys, whatever it may be from your home, do it this week. This is such a great way to start off a year. I'm doing it again this week. In my home, I don't really have much to purge because I purged a year ago right now, and then I purged again when I moved in September. And I mean, I'm like, I've become a minimalist, which I wasn't before, but I have so much less junk or just additional things. And what's great about that is you create space for opportunity and blessings and miracles to arrive in your life. It works. I don't know exactly how, but it does. Trust me, you will just feel lighter starting this year off with this clean slate and opening all of this space in your life for opportunity to come in. Okay, so that was another great element. Now, this year, I didn't do this last year, but this year I learned the idea of saging, which is you basically buy a saging stick. You can get them online, you can get them on Amazon, you can get them locally in stores, and you light the saging stick, and you walk. around the perimeter of your home, just basically allowing negativity to be pulled out of your home

and creating space and opportunity for positivity in the year. And you just state your intentions. Again, nothing bad will come of this. And it was so funny, my son was the one that reminded me to do it. He said, Mom, you were going to sage the house. Let's get all that negativity out of here and start this year off with a great positive kick. And I thought, oh my gosh, let's do it. Right. So there's no downside to that. So we sage the house and basically started everything on a clear positive slate, really focusing on gratitude, how much we have to be grateful for. Every morning I wake up and open all the blinds in my home and just thank God. I'm so blessed and so lucky to live where I live, to be healthy and safe. You know, I thank God for all of the blessings

of my life. I really encourage you to do the same. The more grateful we are, the higher our frequency, better our energy, the more people are attracted to us. And the opportunity. Every morning when I pray to God, I also pray, God, please close those doors that are no longer meant for me and please open the ones that are. That's another really important ask that I have, right? I don't want to hang on to things that aren't meant for me anymore. I want to let go. I want to let God in my life. And I want to, I know that God's plan is greater than mine and I turn it over.

I surrender. And when you do that, you allow for so much more than you can ever imagine. Now, one of the keys I believe, and I've learned this over the last year, is write down those occurrences when they show up, right? So when my court case wrapped up unexpectedly in a miracle way, write that down. One of the things I do, if it's something that can be taken a photo of, I put it in my favorites file, in my photos, in my phone, right? And I do that so I can very easily go revisit. Oh, wait, here are some of the miracles in my life. I can't forget about those because we do. Someone said to me the other day, oh my gosh, things are going so amazing for you. And I said,

they are? And they said, don't you remember what you didn't think you could ever sell your condo? And now you're, you sold your condo and you're living somewhere incredible and you're meeting all these new people and doing these new exciting things. I had forgotten already. How did I forget that? Right. It's so easy. We need to remind ourselves. So we need to be our biggest champion and cheerleader. And it's about discipline and revisiting. All this incredible thing happened. That also tells me what could potentially happen next. I need to be open to receiving these 11th hour miracles and just knowing that they're out there and they're coming. If your anxiety, depression, or ADHD are more than a rough patch, you don't need just another

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sure, and I can't wait to give one to my best friend for her birthday this year. It is timeless, gorgeous, and the softest thing I've ever touched. Which quince pieces are you interested in? I mean, from the bags to the denim, to the sweaters, to the jackets, they're all incredible luxury high-end products without the high-end price. Refresh your wardrobe with quince. Don't wait. Go to quince.com slash confidence for free shipping on your order and 365. day returns now available in Canada too that's Q you I NCE.com slash confidence to get free shipping and 365 day returns quince.com slash confidence another thing that I changed last year it sounds small but these small things add up it's sort of like you're you're alerting the universe to I am changing

I am evolving this year's going to be bigger it's going to be better and I am so excited to take it on. Okay, so last year at this time, I changed my perfume. I know that sounds so basic and, you know, not exciting, but it worked because every time I would smell it, I thought, oh my gosh, new opportunity, new year, new better version of me. And this year, I'm sticking with the same perfume from last year because I'm obsessed with it. I love it. It's so beautiful. But this year, I decided I'm doing that with clothes. I don't know about you, but I get into a rut where I'll wear the same uniform. I end up in black or dark colors, especially in the winter. This is taking me back to my Boston roots. And that's not who I want to be anymore. I don't want to just get in a rut or

routine because it's easy. So I challenged myself. And for the month of December, I got so many new outfits of color. And here's why, because it just signifies to me. It's so beautiful. It's so vibrant. It's excited that I get excited to get dressed. Yeah, this is the dork, your friend Heather. This is who I am. And so I just challenge you to think, like, what small change can you make in your life that can make you feel more excited to get ready in the morning? I don't know if it's your perfume, your cologne, your clothing, whatever it may be, but that's going to put a little spring in your step because there are so many small things we can do every day to pick ourselves up. Oh my gosh, that reminds me of my soul sayings. They are incredible. They're the positive messaging you

put on your shoes. So midwere, way in your day. If you're feeling down, you look at the bottom of your shoes and remember who you are and what's possible for you. Okay, check the show notes in the podcast below to get the link to get yours. They're, I think they're only $10. I don't know. They're incredible. Okay. So those are some of the things that I've been doing that have been really helpful for me. Another thing is write down your intentions, your vision for the year. And that can be your goals. That can be, you know, what you're manifesting, what you're putting out there, what you're asking for, what you're praying for. Write it down. are 90% more likely to accomplish things when they write things down. I revisit them daily. I talk about

this in my speeches all the time, and it's shocking how often people will write down their grocery list because they don't want to forget the spinach or the protein bars for their kid, but they don't write down their goals and their plans and their intention and vision for the year. You need to do that. Please do that for me right now. It is not too late for 2023. Let's declare it. One of the things that I took from a good friend of mine, John Gordon, who's incredible. If you don't follow him, definitely check out his content's amazing, is he shared what he says every morning when he wakes up and I wrote it down and now I read it every day. Again, there's nothing negative that can come from routines like this. So I just encourage you to think about it. If it resonates with you,

put it into motion. Let me know how you're doing it in a month. I promise you it's going to make you feel better. And it's probably going to unlock some opportunities for you as well. Okay, so here's what I say every day. I expect great things to happen today. God, I trust in your plan for my life. I accept all the joy, love success, and abundance in my life. Every day, I'm getting stronger, healthier, and better. And I accept all the people that want to work with me and benefit from my gifts and talents you've bestowed upon me. I receive your miracles today and every day. The best is yet to come. So again, there is nothing bad there. There is no downside to it. It takes a couple of minutes every day. But it starts your day. day off in this amazing mindset from an abundant standpoint, a positive standpoint, and just a feel-good, do-good standpoint. So sending you all of my good vibes that you take these on and make this your year, whether you think the New Year is a big deal or not. Promise you, it is a big deal for me. I hope you're reflecting on how far you've come from last year. Because when you see that, know that you're starting off this much stronger,

this much better equipped this year. Holy cow, can you imagine that growth for next year? It's so flipping exciting. I get so excited. Okay, you want to celebrate how far you've come, right? You want to celebrate the small ones and the big ones. It's really important, and we so often forget to do that on the daily. This was interesting. I put a post up on LinkedIn.

If you're not following me on LinkedIn, please do. I put up a lot of great content and it takes me a lot of time to create it, so please check it out. But I put this post up on the first, and it shocked me how many DMs I got about it. Okay, here's what I wrote. Not all goodbyes are sad. Bye, 2022. This is your January 1st reminder. It's time to say goodbye to anything you've been holding on to for too long. Say goodbye to the idea of the relationship that didn't work out. The boss that

doesn't support you. The friend that judges you. The idea of playing small to make others happy. The idea that it's better to stay with the devil you know than the devil you don't. The lie that fear is greater than your faith. When you let go of what's been holding you down, You set yourself up to take off. Now is your time. So I challenge you with this. What do you need to say goodbye to? You know, is it that idea of the relationship that didn't work out? Is it that idea that playing small is going to make others happy and you need to do that? No, I received so many DMs about that post and people telling me what they were committing to let go to. So let me know what you're going to let go of. Leave it in a review of the podcast. Please,

Oh my gosh, because when you leave a review the podcast, it helps so much. We have 1,600, over 1,600 reviews right now. Please, if you haven't left one, leave a review there and tell me in the review what you're committing to letting go of in 2023. When you do that, you're going to hold yourself accountable because you know it's going to live there. Okay? So you've got to hold yourself accountable to make these leaps. And I am letting go of everything and anything negative from the past that was holding me down, no more circling the drain by 2020. It ended there. I'm leaving it there. I hope you're leaving it there too. Let me know in the reviews what you are letting go of and hold yourself accountable. That shift is powerful. Okay. Add some positives

to your life and delete some negatives. Sounds super simple. But for me, for 2023, I'm adding running back into my life, which I have gotten away from because I got injured a few years ago. But I just miss it so much that I decided I'm going to take a small approach. I'm only going to let myself do it three times a week, but I'm obsessed with running. Don't tell anyone I really am. And it's something that I was doing, at one point I was running like nine miles a day or something crazy like that. I ended up getting injured. So this time I'm going to do it on a much smaller level. I'm going to make sure I stretch and make sure I do other things like spinning, which is low impact and doesn't harm me at all. But I want to incorporate it back in my life. It's something really positive that I know I can bring into my life that helps me to be

more creative. It helps me just feel really amazing and grateful. And I'm so excited for it. When you want more, start your business with Northwest Registered Agent and get access to thousands of free guides, tools, and legal forms to help you launch and protect your business. All in one place. Build your complete business identity with Northwest today. Northwest Registered Agents has been helping small business owners and entrepreneurs launch and grow businesses for nearly 30 years. They are the largest registered agent and LLC service in the U.S. with over 1,500 corporate guides, real people who know your local laws and can help you in your business every step of the way. Build your business identity fast with Northwest Registered Agent and get access to thousands of

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I know it's an element that I'm missing. from really getting myself to the next level. There's always so much more potential within us to get better, to grow, and to evolve more. So meditation is something I am bringing into my life, probably like the running. I'll be happy if I can do it three times a week, but I'm committed. I'm committed to doing it. I'm bringing it in. Now negative things that I can get rid of. I have stayed up way too late this year, especially moving into my new house, and I love, I just love sitting by myself on my couch and looking out the window and feeling grateful, but that's led to me staying up way too late, and I am done with that. During the week, this girl is going to bed every night by 10 p.m. Like, it's a wrap. It's over.

I'm committed to it. So what positives can you add to your life? And then what negatives can you pull from your life so that 2023 is that much better than 2022? Right. You have the power to make all these decisions. Write them down. Commit to them. Hold yourself accountable. Okay, I'm a big believer in You know, the knowledge that we access can really impact us if we apply it. So one of the things that I noticed was a lot of people were initiating challenges for 2023, which is, I think is so, I think is amazing. And I'm actually working on one now for you. It is not developed yet and finalized, but stay tuned.

It will be. I love the idea of people working in community towards common goals and having specific timelines, right? Smart goals, specific, measurable, attainable, realist. and timely, right? You need to really commit to specifics there. So I saw that Gabby Bernstein was launching a 21-day challenge. It's still live right now. You can go sign up for it. Check her out at Gabby Bernstein. And it's all about manifesting the year that you want. And I thought, you know what, I have no idea what she's content she's creating or what she's put together. I'm going to go check it out. So I signed up for it and you get an email from her every day basically telling you what she wants you to do

to manifest, you know, whatever it is that you're trying to obtain for 2023. Again, to me, what's the downside on something like that? It's something different I haven't done before. I'm always open to learning new, different, and better ways to do things. So why not try it? See what resonates with me and keep what resonates and then drop what doesn't. So she has these manifestation cards that she shares each day, as well as she gives you a directive of something that she wants you to do. So I'll share with you. The first manifestation card she shared was, I claim my desires, I hold great visions, I am ready to receive.

And her whole thing is about being a super attractor to attract great things into your life and the things that you want to manifest into your life. So the one that I received today was the universe has big plans for me, and it's time to claim them. And then she talks about some of the blocks that people have in their life, how they're blocking what they're trying to manifest, and that oftentimes it's because people are jealous of others or concerned with what others think of them. And I know that I've talked a lot in my books about this, about, you know, that concern of what other people think of you.

Here's the thing. Playing small because you think that's going to help someone feel better or, you know, hide from them. No. Our purpose for being on this planet is to make the world a better and brighter place. this is your directive for 2023. Turn up your light. You know, maybe those people that are judging you, they're just not the right people. Maybe those people that say you're too much, they're not enough, right? It's about firing those villains that are holding you down, letting them go, removing that negativity and judgment from your life and stepping in to that possibility of who you are meant to be.

Judgment-free zone, if you're looking for permission, I'm giving it to you right now, permission granted to go for more in this year. Turn up your light. Make the world a better place. We need you. The world needs you. And I am calling you and challenging you in this moment to drop that judgment from other people and step into who you really are and put that focus back on you. We think that so often people are focused on us or judging us, but the reality is people are always in their own head thinking about their own life, their own challenges. situations, opportunities, judging themselves, right? So when we put that focus back on ourselves and say, okay, I need to focus on what I'm doing, what, you know, good I'm doing in the world,

what life I'm creating, and start thinking about who are the people I can help? And I dial it down to if I'm helping one person, if I make a difference in one person's life, then that's a reason to celebrate. That's a win, right? So try to give yourself, lower those expectations. Stop allowing others to judge you and instead turn that around. Think of when I light my light, when I show up as the brightest, best version myself, who could I inspire? Right. When I share my wins on social media, I landed a magazine cover that I'm actually sharing this week on LinkedIn and I know haters are going to come from me. They always do, right? But I celebrate the haters because I know this. Number one, if you are getting hate, it's because you're not vanilla, you're different,

you're unique. And I love that. I don't want to be like everybody else. I want to to be me. Right? So the minute you've grown a community beyond just your closest friends, there's going to be people that don't like you. That's okay, because I'm unique and different. I'm not vanilla and I don't want to be vanilla. And so that reminds me when I get some hate messages or comments, it just reminds me that, okay, you know what? I'm expanding my reach. I'm growing and I'm not vanilla. And those are two things to celebrate and I'm super excited about both of them. So I hope you can apply that to your life when you get any negative comments from people. And the other thing is, when people take the time to write negative comments, that is so much

more about them than about you. And I generally feel badly for people if they're in such a tough mental state that they want to attack others, right? Send those people love. Send those people kindness. And it's funny, if you catch me on an off day, right, like anybody, I have good days and bad days. If you catch me on a stressed out day when I'm on very little sleep, I stayed up too late the day before or something's going on with my kid and stressing me out, right? Just typical, normal, first world problems. And then I get a, you know, a hater message that happened to me a couple weeks ago. And I was just not in a great mood. And I got this really negative message from somebody. Or I interpreted that way. Maybe that's a better way to say it. I interpreted it as someone

was really judging me. And I decided to respond, make myself respond with kindness. And it turned out the person wasn't judging me. The person was having a bad day. The person was so grateful when I sent back a kind note, and they apologized immediately if their note had come across in a negative way. So sometimes we just were not communicating clearly or messages are misconstrued in DMs or in text messages. And it's about taking that step back and instead of being the bigger person and showing up as that best version of ourselves, even when it seems a little hard, I felt so grateful that I paused for a moment was thoughtful and kind in my response because my natural response when I was having a bed day was to be like,

ah, you know, oh gosh, you're a jerk or you're not very nice. But I'm really grateful that I didn't do it. So when you do see something negative, pause for a moment, consider that maybe that person's in a really difficult situation that we know nothing about and extend some kindness. And when you do, you might be really pleasantly surprised. I certainly was. My point is, I got this magazine cover.

I know I'm going to post about it because I'm going to share it, and here's why. I'm super proud of the accomplishments I've had in my life and in my career. I've worked so hard in business for, oh my gosh, what is it now? Almost 30 years, right? I've been building my business acumen and my accomplishments for that long, right, ever since I graduated college. And it's just, it's been crazy to watch it unfold. You know, I've made some good decisions.

I gave up so much in my life for my career. And I look back and there's time. I wish that I hadn't given up as much as I did, but I've learned from all of it. And it just makes you who you are today, right? So of course, when I get recognized for what I've accomplished, I want to celebrate that. I gave up a lot to get here, right, to do the things that I've done. And I'm really grateful for that. So when someone wants to recognize those accomplishments in a big way, I'm going to share it. And there was years I wouldn't do that until I realized, and this was, I guess seven years ago, I gave a speech for City or Miami charity, and my assistant then

broadcast at Live to Facebook. I did not know she was doing it. If you've read my new book, Overcome Your Villains, you know the whole story. If you haven't, go get Overcome Your Villains and listen to the Audible version. It's so, so good. The point is, I received hundreds of DMs that day from people thanking me for sharing my story, sharing that I was a single mother, sharing what I had accomplished, what I had sacrificed and given up because it inspired them to know they could go for more. Once I decided to look at it from that vantage point that when I share my wins, I'm actually enabling and empowering other people to go for more. I thought it's selfish of me not to. So anyways, I'm sharing the magazine cover, but I know this isn't my first rodeo. I know I've

got to get some major hate back from that, but I'm ready for it, right? I'm actually, I'm looking forward to because that means I'm reaching a bigger audience. That means I'm showing up as unique. And that means I'm also going to inspire some other people to go for more and to share their wins and to share their accomplishments. And I'll be to cheer them on. And I'm here to cheer you on too. So step into that unknown this year. Step into that possibility and let go and just know that this is going to be an incredible year. It's definitely going to be for me. I know it's going to be for you. Keep making those next right decisions. Keep turning up your light and going for more. more and keep stepping into what can be from that miracle mindset because there are blessings and miracles all around each one of us every day. I'm celebrating these wins with you. I hope you're celebrating with me. I know you are. And I'm expecting miracles and great things to happen for me and for you. So if you haven't, please leave a review of the show. If you could share it with one friend,

you have no idea how much this show. I'm grateful for you because you are the one that grows this show, when you share it, when you leave the review, when you download the episodes, that means the world to me. So you're telling me to keep showing up each week for you. And if you like this episode, share it. I'll know you liked it and I'll talk more about the things that I talked about in this episode. If there's something you want me to cover, send me a DM. Go to my website, Heather Monaghan.com, and let me know any question you want me to answer. I got you. I'll do it next week. Until then, keep creating your confidence. This is going to be your best year yet.