Creating Confidence with Heather Monahan - #336: The Confidence Tips You MISSED From My Masterclass With Heather!

Episode Date: July 5, 2023

Go to https://heathermonahan.com/sales-confidence-masterclass/ to get on the waitlist for Heather’s next masterclass!  In This Episode You Will Learn About:  The best tips for getting through your Confidence Crush How I found my power when I was really low The action steps to build your self esteem every day Resources: Visit heathermonahan.com Overcome Your Villains is Available NOW! Order here: https://overcomeyourvillains.com  If you haven't yet, get my first book Confidence Creator Go to 4Patriots.com and use code CONFIDENCE to get 10% off Go to stopboneonbone.com/confidence, stock up 55% OFF today on Native Path Collagen Visit Indeed.com/monahan to start hiring now Show Notes:  Did you miss my masterclass last week? Don’t worry! Over these next few episodes, I will share all the best highlights from my exclusive three part masterclass. Today is all about CONFIDENCE. When I was fired, I had to find out what REAL confidence was without the titles, the paycheck, and the ego. And let me tell you, a job does NOT define you! The confidence you want is within reach and I will share with you all the simple and actionable steps you need to find it. Take these tips and start building your confidence every day! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hey, I'm here to tell you about a new podcast that I'm really excited about. Negotiate your best life hosted by Rebecca Zung, a part of the Yap Media Network, as a globally renowned narcissist negotiation expert and an attorney recognized by the US news as a best lawyer in America, Rebecca shares her invaluable insights and strategies for navigating life's toughest negotiations. By drawing from her own experiences and the wisdom of her high profile guests such as Bob Proctor, Mark Victor Hanson, John Gordon, and Rebecca Deliver's empowering advice that will inspire you to reclaim control of your life. Negotiate your best life is all about how to negotiate your way to

greatness. She provides practical guidance on how to break free from toxic relationships stand up against injustice, and transform chaos into freedom, possibility, and purpose. Many times the first negotiation you do is with your own self and the morning. In this morning when you wake up, negotiate your best life is all about finding your way to greatness, conquering obstacles, and creating the life you truly deserve. Get ready to slay, thrive, and unlock your full potential. Don't believe me?

I'm going to go ahead and share some of the reviews so you can hear firsthand. You have helped me so much these last few weeks. I was with a narcissist for two years. She drove me to the point I wanted to take my own life listening to you has made a massive difference and now I know what I'm working with. Thank you Rebecca now the recovery. Oh, Rebecca's on helped save my life and I mean save my life. She helped millions of people stay on the right side of the law while breaking free from shattering, shocking, chilling narcissistic abuse. Wow. This is game changing stuff that Rebecca is doing. You gotta listen. If you are ready to stand up against injustice and transform the chaos in your life into freedom, possibility, and purpose,

then check out, negotiate your best life now. Subscribe to Negotiate Your Best Life with Rebecca Zung today on Apple Podcasts Bodify or on your favorite podcast platform. Hi and welcome back. I'm so glad you're back here this week. Okay, so I had a lot of questions about my new master class that I just brought to light and I'll tell you, it was incredible. It went so well. It was over a two day period and every single person that attended the master class voted a 10 out of 10 on our survey after the event closed.

So super proud of my first master class, continuing to move into the unknown, test and try different things, it's always gonna be the answer. Done is better than perfect, especially when you get 10 out of 10 on your reviews. And listen, if you're not asking your clients for testimonials, start now. There's nothing more powerful than hearing the feedback that your clients have for the

work that you do not only to help you to market your programs to other people moving forward, but also to get feedback on, you know, where can we get better? What would you like to see different? What did you like? What didn't you like? You know, always trying to find ways. How can we improve? How can we get better? What would you like to see different? What did you like? What didn't you like, you know, always trying to find ways? How can we improve? How can we involve?

Because staying the same is staying comfortable and that is no place for us. So because I had so many questions, I wanted to give you a little mashup today insight into the three part master class, which was confidence, personal branding and sales. So today we're to be hitting you a little bit of a mashup on confidence.

I hope that some of the tips and tricks help support you to level up your confidence. And for all of you that missed this masterclass, check out the show notes below so that you can get on the wait list for the next masterclass. I will email you and make sure that you get invited. And I've got something new coming up too. So make sure that you get invited and I've got something new coming up too. So make sure that you get your name on these lists

so that you get updated on my email list of everything that I'm launching, bringing to market, and bringing to add value to you. So here we go. This is going to be a little insight into my first master class around the topic of, you know it it confidence. If you like the show, please share it, tag me, leave a review. It means the world to me. No one succeeds alone, and that includes your girl. All right, here we go.

Confidence has really been the foundation for success in my life. And as I mentioned, I am not always confident. I'm certainly always pushing myself to that next level to uncertain moments. And anytime I do that, my confidence dips, which I'm super proud of. I think that's amazing, right? And if you're not rocking that and owning that, I really encourage you too,

because the reality is, and people ask this a lot, what's the difference between being confident and being arrogant? The gap there is so tremendously wide. Erigan people are the most insecure people there are, right? And I know that firsthand when I was a lot younger, I was very arrogant. I attributed so much confidence to titles and paychecks, and all these external things outside of me had nothing to do with who I was inside. And I would try to be my loudest, most disruptive version of myself to get attention so that people would feel intimidated so they would think I was confident. And I remember

what it felt like being that person, being that version of myself, cut to today, I'm very comfortable in who I am. I don't apologize for it. I own it. I make mistakes all the time. I own those. Right. I'm very comfortable confident in who I am as a person now. And the disparity between those two versions of me is so big. There is no chance that if you're building your confidence, you're being real with yourself, you're being honest with yourself, that you're anywhere near being arrogant. So please do not fear that. And when you see really, really arrogant people, try to have a little empathy for them,

knowing that they are the most insecure of all that I know to be true. Okay. You know, one of my big confidence loss moments is when I was fired unexpectedly in corporate America. And one of the things I found to be really, really helpful that sounds so basic and simple that anyone can do, that I promise you will deliver your results is creating a 30 day action plan. This was so life saving for me,

because when you feel like you lost everything and you're just knocked down in a big way, it's hard to stand up and say, where am I going? What is my future look like? Because you don't really know. So it was really, really helpful for me to literally take a piece of paper, break it out, write out 30 days, and then take it one day by one day. And that's so helpful because it can be very overwhelming when you're saying, like, what am I supposed to be doing with my life and where will I be in five and ten years? That pressure feels massive and that's how I felt when I first got my confidence fresh. But when I broke it down into these like day by day, one day at a time, I knew I could make it through the next day and I knew that I might not have that next answer yet.

And this is where the 30 day plan became powerful for me. I remember number one, we've got to set goals, guys, and we've got to get specific. The more specific we can be, the better. Now, that doesn't mean that you have to have the specific goal mapped out clearly right in this instant, but you have to take action towards it. So for me, I remember at first, I said,

I want to be a more confident version myself with more clarity at day 30. So that wasn't very clear, but that was the best I could come up with when I was really low. So I mapped that out. The next thing I did was I started that 30 day journey was taking, it's like, if you want to lose weight over 30 days,

you weigh in on day one, you weigh yourself daily, you set a goal, and you need a plan to get there. So I thought, I'm going to weigh in right now, where am I? And I'm like at a 0.0 on a confidence Richter scale. Like I was wiped out, I had nothing and I fell down and lost. So I'm like, okay, logging in here today that I'm at a zero, I'm not feeling really excited about anything super confused, not sure how to move forward. So then I remember, you know, again, action is important. Intention, goal setting, action, like all these things need to be part of your daily plan that you're revisiting. And so for me, I, my posted, I've just been fired.

If I've ever done anything to help you, I need to hear from you now. I asked for help, right? So asking for help was something really helpful. And that sent me down a totally different road, which ultimately landed me on the Elvis Durant show, which is where he said to me, spoke a truth and a conviction into me, never underestimate the power of your words,

where he said to me, obviously, how the you're writing a book. So again, those things all didn't happen in one day. They happened over a couple of months, period of time. But taking the action of putting the post up was that first step that start, and I didn't know 30 days from them that was gonna allow me to land on that show

or that I was gonna meet this person or that idea of inspiration was gonna be spoken into me. I didn't know any of those things, but I knew I could take action and put the post up, not knowing where that would go next. So it's just really important that we open our mind to what action stuff can I take today that I can live with, not knowing where that will take me next, but knowing it's going to take me somewhere.

And that in turn will build momentum for you as well. Okay, now that we're in the thick of the summer, you may be like me and over cooking three different meals a day for you and for your family. That's where factor America's number one, ready to eat meal kit, can help you fuel up fast with flavorful and nutritious, ready to eat meals delivered. Straight to your door. Just like me. You will save time, eat well, and stay on track to your goals. Regardless of what your goals are, the food is fresh, it's definitely not frozen, and meals are ready in only two minutes. All you have to do is heat it up and you are good, and you are back out there doing whatever you want to do or whatever your kids want to do. The options are unbelievable.

My son's always looking to add more protein to his diet. I am looking to cut calories. You know, there's answers for everybody. There's a diet tension approved calorie smart meal with around 550 calories per serving or extra boost to support your wellness goals. That's what my son's looking for. He's trying protein plus meals with 30 grams of protein or more per serving. The food is delicious. Flavor pack and the options are

going to blow you away. I mean, you can do the keto program, calories smart, vegan plus, veggie protein plus. The foods prepared by chefs and approved by dietitians, each meal has all of the ingredients you need to feel satisfied all day long while meeting your goals. And you won't be stuck in the kitchen. Make this the end of the summer that you love because you're not stuck by a stove. With Factor, you can rest assured you're making a sustainable choice. They are offsetting 100% of the delivery emission source, 100% renewable electricity for the production sites and offices and feature sustainable source seafood in their meals. This July, only a few days left, get factor and enjoy eating well without the hassle. Simply choose your meals and enjoy fresh, flavor-packed meals delivered right to your door just like

me. Ready, in just two minutes, no prep, no mess, head to factormeals.com slash confidence50 and use code confidence50 to get 50% off. That's right! Code Confidence50 at Factor Meals.com slash Confidence50. It will get you 50% off. You are welcome. Not too long ago, I had the idea I wanted to sell my confidence video course.

I had no idea how to do it or where to get started. That is why I am so glad I found Shopify. Yes, that's the sound of me getting paid while I'm sleeping. Thanks to Shopify, they made it so unbelievably easy. Shopify is a commerce platform, to Shopify, they made it so unbelievably easy. Shopify is a commerce platform, revolutionizing millions of businesses worldwide. Whether you're a garage entrepreneur or IPO ready, Shopify is the only tool you need to start,

run and grow your business without the struggle. Shopify puts you in control of every sales channel. So whether you're selling satin sheets from Shopify's in-person POS system or offering organic olive oil on Shopify's all-in-one e-commerce platform, you are covered. Let me tell you, it's been unbelievable. I've sold my masterclass on Shopify. My video courses on Shopify. My workshops on Shopify. My virtual keynotes on Shopify, I mean, literally everything that I have for a concept now goes on to Shopify and I make money on the platform while I sleep.

And they continually upgrade and advance Shopify offering me new solutions and new add-ons to make my offering that much better. And it's so easy. Shopify powers 10% of all e-commerce in the US and Shopify's truly a global force powering albers, Rothees, and Brooklyn and millions of other entrepreneurs of every size across 170 countries. Plus Shopify's award-winning help

is there to support your success every step of the way. This is possibility powered by Shopify and they make it so simple. Sign up for a $1 per month trial period at Shopify.com slash monahan. All lowercase. Go to Shopify.com slash monahan to take your business to the next level today. Shopify.com slash monahan. And you'll be hearing this before you know it. This was a game changer for me around confidence. And this is again, it's a cultural thing that we've all been conditioned to do,

to apologize for everything. I was right there apologizing my whole life for everything. Somebody would bump into me. I would apologize to them. And I remember I figured it out at Barry's boot camp, and people were bumping into me all the time, and I spent so much time apologizing for it. I want to give everybody here a 30-day challenge,

no more apologizing. Instead, stop making it about you, and start making it about everybody else. So when you show up and you disrupt something, thank everybody. Thanks so much for your understanding. I was running late and I appreciate your patience. You know, when we start thanking people, we make it about them, their consideration, and being grateful for them. And it makes other people feel really good. So that's a great

challenge for everyone to implement. And while you're doing that simultaneously, you're making people feel better about themselves, you start feeling better about yourself. Oh my gosh, gravity is a superpower. So often people are over explaining things, right? Let me tell you why this, this, and this. I don't care. Nobody has any patients anymore. We're all getting messaging sent to us from nine million different places. Our phones are going, the emails popping up. Like there's so many things happening at one time. The more condensed and concise we can be,

we don't need to over-explain ourselves. We don't need to justify everything. We can own who we are and what we're doing, no explanation necessary. And that is a power move around elevating your confidence. Shine your light to inspire others. Quick story I'll never forget.

I was giving a talk years ago, and I had never shared that I had grown up for. I was afraid to do it fear again, that big fear monster. I was afraid to do it because I thought people would look down on me and judge me and not see me as powerful in business. And I did it.

That day that I did it, my assistant was in the back of the room, had my phone, it was live streaming that speech to Facebook, unbeknownst to me. I would have never let her do that. She was trying to help push you to a nice person. And what ended up happening was I got off the stage that day and there was hundreds of messages on my Facebook account, which I thought would never happen. That's so weird. What's going on? I clicked on it only to see Thank you so much for sharing that story. I grew up poor too I never knew that I could get out of this situation like you did. Thank you for leading the way Thank you for showing what's possible the amount of gratitude

I I thought I was gonna receive judgment I was deciding something and I had no information to decide that. Right? Like I was deciding for other people, which we can never do. But when in actuality, I stepped into the fear it happened and I was living it, I got all these blessings back from people for leading in a way that I had never anticipated. So, you know, the more we shine our light and own who we really are, the more we shine a light on our own shame and own that, the more we give permission to others to do the same. So try to reverse the way that you see it when that can be something that stops you.

Okay, accountability partners are critical in building confidence, just like a weight loss partner or a trainer, someone that you're working with, I've got a three 30 day accountability email program that I'll send everybody to link for. You'll get an email every day reminding you that you need to step into fear, reminding you that you need to raise the bar on your goals. That big is not big enough, you know, just pushing you. And if you have someone that you trust

that knows your true champion in your life, ask that person, tap them to be your accountability partner. One of my best friends was going through testing for cancer and it was going through a really tough time and she called me and said, I need you to be my partner for the next couple of months so that every day I know you're gonna hold me to task and make sure that I'm being positive and make sure I'm doing the right things. And I was like, oh my, thank you for that honor of asking me. Like people want to be a part of helping other people. So ask someone that you trust and let them give you that gift of holding you accountable to push yourself to achieve your goals. Take others off the pedestal. I received a message from a Harvard professor saying, Hey, come teach at Harvard. I thought it was a total scam because I'm like, I couldn't

get into Harvard. How would someone want me to be at Harvard? This is a joke, major imposter syndrome. Here's what I learned. We want to live in a world we want to. We don't currently. We want to live in a world where everyone's equal. Right? Where we're not judged for our color, our weight, our financial, socio, economic class, our IQ, whatever,

our sexual prep, whatever. Everyone is created equal and should be treated as such. That's how I want my child's live, but that's how I want to live, but I'm not allowing that to happen. If I'm going to put certain people on pedestals, and the minute I decided to look at it that way, like I'm part of the problem. If I'm going to put Harvard on a pedestal, I'm part of the problem over here, creating that some people are better than others, right? So take everybody off the pedestals, level them out. I literally do it in my mind. I watch that professor step off that pedestal,

and then I ask him a question. I said, why would you want me to speak at Harvard? And he explained how he saw me, well, you're a single mother. You approach sales as a woman, which is not something I have experienced with. You've been in the business community recently. I have been teaching for 20-something years. I've been out of it.

You understand social media? I don't understand that. Once he broke down for me how he saw me, I was able to take his rose colored glasses on and put them on myself and say, my gosh, he's beating me with me. This guy Harvard needs me. Right? So I was able to see it completely different once I saw it from his perspective.

So ask those other people, whoever it is that you have on a pedestal, take them off that pedestal, visit and see yourself do it. And then when they're asking you for help with something, ask them why you and start to put those rose colored glasses on when you're looking in the mirror and recognize that within yourself. Depend on yourself if the power grid ever quits for a day or longer. January marked the third time a power station in North Carolina was damaged by gunfire recently. Authorities are saying the attack

raises a new level of threat. Authorities are now checking our grid for vulnerabilities. They've identified nine key substations. If these substations are attacked, power could be knocked out from coast to coast for up to 18 months. Imagine a blackout, lasting, not days, but weeks or months. Your life would be frozen in time right at the moment the power fails. Lites all over the country would go out throwing people into total darkness. That's why having your own solar power is more important than ever. With the new Patriot Power Generator 2000X, you get a solar generator that doesn't install into your house because it's portable.

You can take it with you, even use it inside. But it's powerful enough for your phones, medical devices, or even your fridge. And right now, you can go to fourpatriots.com and use code Confidence to get 10% off your first purchase on anything in the store, including the Patriot Power Generator. You'll also get their famous guarantee for an entire year after your order, plus free shipping on orders over $97.

And a portion of every sale is donated to charities who support our veterans and their families. Just go to 4patriots.com and use code confidence to get 10% off. That's 4patriots.com use code confidence to get yours today. It doesn't need to cost a fortune for you to live your best life. Some of the smallest changes that we can make don't cost a ton, but can make you feel so happy in your own skin and in your own home. That's what cozy earth is doing for me. Cozy earth crafts luxury goods that transform your lifestyle. Cozy earth has been featured on Oprah's favorite things.

Five years in a row. All products come with a 10 year warranty. Cozy earth is so comfortable. My tea is incredible. I love wearing it. I feel cool when I'm wearing. I mean, literally the products are incredible. They're so nice and high end yet you won't believe the deal that you're going to get today. Cozy earth lounge where offers optimal comfort while maintaining a flattering elegant fit. And I am shouting that out because I love my new t-shirt. I've that's a matter of fact, that's a matter of fact, that's a matter of fact, that's a matter of fact, that's a matter of fact,

that's a matter of fact, that's a matter of fact, that's a matter of fact, that's a matter of fact, that's a matter of fact, that's a matter of fact, that's a matter of fact, that's a matter of fact,

that's a matter of fact, that's a matter of fact, that's a matter of fact, that's a matter of fact, that's a matter of fact, that's a matter of fact, that's a matter of fact, that's a matter of fact,

that's a matter of fact, that's a matter of fact, that's a matter of fact, that's a matter of fact, that's a matter of fact, that's a matter of fact, that's a matter of fact, that's a matter of fact, Listen to that, what life is supposed to be all about. I think it is. So if I can make some small changes, like adding cozy earth into my rotation, into my sheets, into my linens, and into my clothes, I'm pulling the trigger, and I already made it happen. Cozy earth betting is temperature regulating.

For me, that's everything. I cannot be sweating at night. Listen, cozy earth made over favorite things five years in a row. For a reason, the products are incredible. Don't believe me. Check it out. Cozy earth provided an exclusive offer for my listeners today. And for you right now, you're getting up to 35% off. Cozy earth dot com site wide when you use the code competence. That's 35% off right now. cozy earth.com. Site wide.

Use the code confidence. You're welcome. Another great way to keep confidence and build confidence is to keep promises that you make to yourself. So like right now in this weekend, you're investing in yourself. We are time. Your resources by being here. And that is a huge first step at showing how valuable and worthy you. But the key really is about keeping that promise to yourself when we're off today,

this afternoon and like, how are you going to sit down and map out? What are those next steps that you're taking? How are you implementing those? So keep those promises to yourself and know that every time that you do, that's a moment you're creating more confidence in yourself and creating more value for you and for your future. Okay, these are some great ways to frame up situations to help you with building confidence. Okay, when you're frustrated with someone with a situation, somebody's crossing your boundaries, you know, disrespecting you, not paying attention to you.

A nice way to approach that situation is say, I'm confused, the client did this to me actually. This is interesting this week. As I mentioned, I've been hacked, and so a number of my clients were redirected to a fraudulent account to send money for speaking engagement deposits. And so what, what am I clients sent me to note the other day and said,

hey Heather, you know, what's going on, ABC and D? And I said, still waiting to hear back from your accounting team, they need to reverse the funds to my account. And then I'll get everything book. Basically what I was saying is I'm not booking until I have the deposit. She came back to me and said, I'm confused. We have a signed contract. We received an email. Like it was handled very professionally and very well. Her point was,

she didn't like my answer, and she didn't need to start a fight. Instead, she approached by, I'm confused. Right? That she needed some clarity here. And that's a really powerful way that is not going to cause a fight with somebody else, but it's going to allow you to be heard clearly. Another thing is say, help me, help me to understand. This is another great one when you're in difficult conversation. I want you to understand. Help me to help you. Right? Again, trying to make the point that we're at some point of impasse or some type of struggle. I think I might need some more information here. What did you mean by that? Tell me more. Always, and this is sales 101, the goal is to get the other person to empty their glass to you.

And you want the more information you can get, the better. Because the more we're going to understand their pain points, their potential objections, what they're positioning in situation is, how they're thinking. So tell me more is a great way to open that conversation up and understand them even better. Let me repeat back what I heard you say. So often, we actually don't hear what somebody's saying.

We hear what they think they're saying. Are we clear on this? That's something that I love to say in corporate America. That's not gonna work for me, right? That's just a very simple statement, letting people know where we stand. Okay, so these are a couple of tools that have been super helpful for me, AI tools that I love. Grammarly is game changing. Basically, what's going to happen? I don't, it's very little money

if there is a paid version. I don't remember, but there is a free version as well. Essentially, here's what it is. It's going to, when you're typing, you put it as an overlay on your Chrome extension and your computer. And then anytime you're typing, whether it be in a Word doc, in a comment on social media, or in an email, emails incredible, it's going to correct and offer you different ways to say things in a brief or fashion, more powerful and more confident, right? It's going to cut out excess words and it's going to offer you other ways to write things. It is so helpful. It's so intuitive. It's so seamless.

And the thing that I really love about it is once a week, it's going to send you an overview and rate and rank how you're doing with your emails versus other grammar-related users. I'm competitive AF. So just this piece alone I think is so exciting. Do you think I like this down arrow that my confidence was down this week? No, I'm like, Heather, come on, get your confidence up, girl. But I love to see those metrics, right?

So it's super helpful. And it just lets you know how people are perceiving you based upon how you're writing, which I find is an incredible tool. It's been really, really helpful for me. Again, this is just showing you more information. There's so, and there's, there are different paid versions, but check it out. It's going to help you a lot with what words you're using, word choices, and being brief or more powerful. The thing about running your own business is every single hire counts, and no hiring partner understands

that, like indeed. Indeed is a hiring platform where you can attract, interview, and hire all in one place. Don't spend hours on multiple jobs sites looking for candidates with the right skills when you can do it all. With indeed, find top talent fast with indeed sweet of powerful hiring tools,

like matching assessments and virtual interviews. Hate waiting, indeed, US data shows over 80% of indeed employers find quality candidates whose resume on indeed matches their job description, the moment they sponsor a job. Indeed, matching is the perfect way to match the ideal candidate that you're looking for, the need that you have and do it fast. Candidates that you invite apply through instant match are three times more likely to apply to your job than candidates who only see in search alone. According to US Indeed data,

with Indeed matching as soon as you sponsor a post, you get a short list of quality candidates whose resumes on Indeed match your job description. Boom, it's hiring at warp speed. Indeed does the hard hiring work for you. Sponsor a job and will match you with quality candidates whose resumes on Indeed fit your job description right when you post. With Indeed, you can start hiring fast.

Join the over 3 million businesses worldwide using Indeed to hire great talent fast. Indeed knows when you're growing your own business, you have to make every dollar count. That's why with Indeed, you only pay for quality applications that match your must-have job requirements. Visit indeed.com slash monahan to start hiring now. Just go to indeed.com slash monahan. Indeed.com slash monahan, terms and conditions apply, cost per application pricing not available for everyone. Need to hire?

You need Indeed. All right, so things I know would be true. Oh, I love this one. Rejection is the ultimate redirection and two personal branding and social media. Social media gives you so much data, which data is power. It doesn't lie, it's so helpful.

Anytime I post rejection is redirection, those posts go crazy. People love hearing it. Not only do I love hearing it because it's true, but it's empowering, like no matter where you are. And this is sales too. If we're all in sales, which we are, we're all gonna be rejected.

The thing is, we don't know so often that rejection is allowing us to go down a different path, which is the ultimate redirection. I wouldn't be here with you today right now if I hadn't been fired, quote unquote, rejected. Right, that rejection was the ultimate blessing in my life. Didn't know it at the time, it took like a year and a half for me to figure that out,

but I will tell you this, that was the ultimate redirection. And when we aren't doing the things that we need to, aren't showing up in the way that we were meant to on this earth, I truly believe the universe, God, however you want to see it, is going to find ways to reject you, to steer you to where you are meant to be. And yes, it may seem weird that all doors are closed, or all accounts are hacked, or whatever is going on, and that's crazy. It's all leading you somewhere, and we can't connect the dots looking forward. We can only connect them looking back.

So you just have to have that faith that you're going to keep showing up, is that best version yourself, keep, let the messages come. Like I always ask these semi-messages, let me know which door should be closed and which one should be open for me to show up as that best version of myself. And when you step into that unknown and have that faith, it's a lot easier to handle that rejection, which we're all dealing with. Okay, when you let go of what was, you open the door to what can be. This is so powerful and so true. If you're hanging on to something in your past, and I just heard a sermon at my church two weeks ago

about this, when you're hanging on so much to something in the past, so tightly, you're not able to see what lies ahead of you. Even though you think you are, you can't. It's about letting go, acceptance, even though it's hard, even though it's sad, even though it's scary, we can use the example of my termination, letting go of what was so that I could start stepping into what

could be that gap took months for me. And the faster you can shorten that gap, you can start stepping into that possibility. And that's when you get true momentum and true excitement and confidence and great things start coming together. But you've got to let go first. So figure out what is that one thing that you're holding onto in your past that you need to let go of today and let go of it.

All right, another thing I know to be true, never take direction from someone who hasn't been where you're going. Oh my gosh, so good. I'll never forget, as I mentioned earlier, my family told me I couldn't write a book and cut to I've written to. Spoiler alert, I've written to. Okay, so what the point is,

didn't mean they had ill will for me, they just didn't think that was possible for me, that was based on their limiting beliefs. And another example of this in corporate America, I remember seeing an opportunity in the company I work for for a job that hadn't been created. And I remember saying, well, I'm going to go pitch them on this. And so many people said to me, are you crazy? If they had wanted to do that, they would have done it. They're not going to say, yes to you. And I remember thinking, well, maybe they say no to you, but they're not going to say no to me. I've got to try it. Like,

maybe I have an angle that you haven't seen before, right? It's always going to be different through our lens, our experience and the way we communicate. You've got to like double down and bet on you spoil or they did create that job. Yes, but still that was a company that fired me. So way too much there. We'll get into more about that tomorrow around sales. Okay. The minute you realize your own value, others will finally realize your value as well. To that end, you know, so many people will be negotiating for an increase at work. But if you're not showing up as that confident versioning yourself, which means you know what you're worth and you know that you deserve it. No one else is going to offer it to you either and that means you've got to be willing to make those difficult decisions.

And when you really own it and are ready to, that's when you'll get those offers. As we talk about being a beginner is such a gift. You see it so differently than other people make it about helping others and your fear will dissipate. Own your mistakes. There's nothing to be embarrassed about. Everybody makes them every single day. And if you're not making mistakes, you're not growing. So that's really sad. Forgiveness is a gift that you give yourself. This, I've been big into forgiveness in the last year

and it's been super helpful. I forgave that lady that fired me. She didn't ask me to. We've never spoken, thankfully. I haven't seen her. I haven't run into her. But I forgave her. But really for myself, because why was I carrying around? I remember I used to Google her, I haven't run into her, but I forgave her, but really for myself,

because why was I carrying around? I remember I used to Google her all the time and I was pissed at her and I think like she's a jerk, but that would just take my energy and power and give it to her and I thought, well, that's not helpful. I rather give my energy and power to me and put focus on good things

that I'm doing for today and tomorrow. So forgiving others is such a great gift that you give yourself. And this is a great prayer. And there's a lot, if you Google this, it's called the whole upono prayer, and originate in Hawaii, I guess. And it's about self forgiveness for you,

not about forgiving somebody else, it's about forgiving you. And they're, what they did in Sean, I don't know if you've seen this research, but they brought this prayer, some doctor did, I don't know if you've seen this research, but they brought this prayer some doctor did I don't know the particulars, but you'll find it on Google this doctor brought this prayer to a prison and Completely transformed a prison because all these prisoners weren't forgiving themselves right like they're beating themselves on and so it's such It's a super interesting case study in the power of self forgiveness.

And it's a very simple prayer. This is the whole prayer right here. I'm sorry, please forgive me. Thank you, I love you. And the whole key is saying it seven times a day. And it's like, if you look at the research on this, it's really powerful. I've been doing it now for a year

and it's just like, it's a beautiful way to forgive yourself and move forward. And I just find it to be super positive. No one succeeds alone. You don't stop and look around once in a while. You can miss it. I'm on this journey with me. I hope you're enjoying this episode so far. I'm Jennifer Cohen, host the top ranking business

and entrepreneur podcast, Habitson Hustle, apart the YAP media network, the number one business and self-improvement podcast network. So most people live the life they get and not the life they want. And I'm here to change all that. My goal with each episode is to give you the habits and hustle tips you need to show up to your life

better, bigger, and bolder. Tune in now, and I'll not only help you answer the questions like what do you want most in life and why don't you have it, but we'll also help you answer the questions, like, what do you want most in life, and why don't you have it, but will also help you make it a reality. I also picked the brains of top thought leaders on how they've gone to the top, and the advice they have to help you get there too.

Head over to Happets and Hustle. Once you've done listening to this episode and get one step closer to boldness, one episode at a time. This episode is brought to you by the YAP Media Podcast Network. I'm Holla Taha, CEO of the award-winning digital media empire YAP Media, and host of YAP Young & Profiting Podcast, a number one entrepreneurship and self-improvement podcast where you can listen, learn, and profit. On Young & Profiting Podcast,

I interview the brightest minds in the world and I turn their wisdom into actionable advice that you can use in your daily life. Each week we dive into a new topic like the art of side hustles, how to level up your influence and persuasion and goal setting. I interview A-List guests on Young & Profiting. I've got the best guest. Like the world's number one negotiation expert, Chris Voss, Shark, Damon John, serial entrepreneur Alex and Leila Hermosi, and even movie stars like Matthew McConaughey.

There's absolutely no fluff on my podcast, and that's on purpose. Every episode is jam packed with advice that's gonna push your life forward. I do my research, I get straight to the point, and I take things really seriously, which is why I'm known as the podcast princess, and how I became one of the top podcastters in the world in less than five years.

Young and profiting podcast is for all ages. Don't let the name fool you. It's an advanced show. As long as you want to learn and level up, you will be forever young. So join podcast royalty and subscribe to Young and Profiting Podcast. Or, yeah, like it's often called by my app fam on Apple Spotify, a young and profiting podcast. Or, yeah, like it's often called by my app fam, on Apple Spotify, CastBox or wherever you listen to your podcast.