Creating Confidence with Heather Monahan - Confidence Classic: How to Stay Powerful When Someone Tries to Intimidate You with Heather!

Episode Date: August 26, 2026

What happens when someone tries to intimidate, bully, or control you? In this episode, I share the lessons I've learned in my life about standing up for yourself, staying calm under pressure, and refu...sing to let someone else dictate how you respond. I break down how to respond instead of react, speak up when you're being disrespected, and navigate difficult conversations. I also share how to recognize when someone may be threatened by you, address conflict from a place of curiosity, and know when it's time to stop shrinking yourself to fit somewhere you've already outgrown. Tune in to learn how to stay powerful when someone tries to intimidate you. In This Episode, You Will Learn: WHY staying calm can shift the power dynamics in the room. How to respond to BULLYING and DIFFICULT PEOPLE without becoming aggressive. The “I'M CONFUSED” approach I use to open difficult conversations. What I noticed in the room when I was unexpectedly fired after 14 years. WHY reacting gives someone else control, while responding puts you back in charge. How to turn REJECTION INTO REDIRECTION when your old life suddenly falls apart. The importance of curating the PEOPLE AND CONTENT you allow into your world. Why you should STOP SHRINKING TO FIT PLACES YOU'VE OUTGROWN. Check Out Our Sponsors: NetSuite - If your revenues are at least in the seven figures, go to NetSuite.ai/MONAHAN. Momentous - Head to livemomentous.com and use code CONFIDENCE for up to 35% off your entire first order. Square - If you’re ready to sell smarter, run faster, and stress less, right now, you can get up to $200 off Square hardware at square.com/go/confidence. Mindstone - Check out Mindstone today and how it can help you with your business needs when it comes to AI: https://www.mindstone.com/. Brevo - Get started for free today—or use code CONFIDENCE50 to save 50% on Starter and Standard Plans for the first three months of an annual subscription.  Resources + Links Call my digital clone at 201-897-2553!  Visit heathermonahan.com Sign up for my mailing list: heathermonahan.com/mailing-list/  Overcome Your Villains is Available NOW! Order here: https://overcomeyourvillains.com  If you haven't yet, get my first book Confidence Creator Follow Heather on Instagram & LinkedIn

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Starting point is 00:00:32 I-a-I-S-Mon-A-I-S-Mon-A-I-S-Mon-A-I-S-Mon-A-Suite-A-I-S-Mon. If you're ready to sell smarter, run faster, and stress less right now, you can get up to $200 off Square Hardware at Square.com slash go-slash-confidence. That's S-Q-U-A-R-E dot com slash G-O-S-FONFENCE. your business smarter was Square. Get started today. When you are a threat,
Starting point is 00:01:06 you will always be the target. The people that lose in all these situations are the ones that react. Don't react, respond. When you react, you're allowing someone to puppeteer you. You're allowing someone else to control you. When you give yourself a moment to take a breath and think and then respond in a very calm manner,
Starting point is 00:01:28 you take all the power out of the room. You control the table and you are in control of yourself, most importantly. I'm on this journey with me. Each week when you join me, we are going to chase down our goals. We overcome adversity and set you up for a better tomorrow. I'm ready for my close-up. Tell me, have you been enjoying these new bonus confidence classics episodes we've been dropping on you every week? We've literally hundreds of episodes for you to listen to.
Starting point is 00:01:55 So these bonuses are a great way to help you find the ones you may have already. missed. I hope you love this one as much as I do. Hi and welcome back. I'm so glad you are back here with me today. Okay, so I got a few DMs that I need to dig into with you because they really caught my attention and I promised I would give them a response. One came from a woman, of course, no names here, but says, Heather, as you know, I'm a huge fan, but I need your help. I've listened to your books and your podcast. In fact, every day on my drive to work, I listen to an episode your podcast, y'all, as I find them motivating and inspiring. Thank you. In fact, because of you, I've learned that I have worth far beyond what a company is willing to pay me. And yes, you do,
Starting point is 00:02:41 by the way. And so do you, right? We all have worth beyond just what we're being paid at work. A paycheck is just, you know, money is an exchange of value in any moment. And valuations change, right? Our excellence, our expertise changes and grows and evolves. You know, there's so, many factors that no, we are much more than just a paycheck at any given time people. And you are too. Okay. I've also faced my fears and I've made some big moves going to a new employer and making some leaps of faith in my life.
Starting point is 00:03:15 Good for you. Growth. I love it. I love it. Living in that uncertainty is all about stepping into fear, growing, taking risks. Yes, yes and yes. Okay. However, at this new company, someone who's supposed to be my.
Starting point is 00:03:30 equal and supposed to be showing me the ropes has been condescending and bullying to me. So this sadly is life, right? There are villains in our lives. We are going to encounter villains. And we have to decide how we are going to handle it and not allow it to go on. So she goes on to say that, you know, she's almost at our wit's end at this point. Why is she even putting up with this? Maybe she should just quit.
Starting point is 00:03:53 She said, I thought about it. And I realized I need to face my villain. Yes, yes. In fact, I think she is probably intimidated by me. Bingo, when you are a threat, you will always be the target. Okay, that's something that I learned. So 99% of the time, if someone's bullying you, it's because they're jealous of you or they are threatened by you. Facts, straight up facts.
Starting point is 00:04:17 Doesn't make it okay, but it is a very true. Okay, nevertheless, could you help me figure out how to say what I need to say, which is, I don't like the way you are speaking to me. I want to sound assertive, but I don't want to be too aggressive. Super smart. You are right. Okay, so I want to address this in the best way possible. Yes, it's important to be assertive and not aggressive, and I want everyone to know this. You don't have to yell at someone to make a point.
Starting point is 00:04:43 You don't have to beat your fists on the table to be heard. In fact, the most powerful people are typically the ones that sit in silence, own their thoughts, and then respond when they're ready, right? The people that lose in all these situations are the ones that react, right? So my whole message on this podcast today and in this specific situation is, don't react, respond.
Starting point is 00:05:11 Now, this is something that's taken me 47 years to learn, right? And I'm still a work in progress like we all are, but I'm getting a lot better. My amazing moment that I'm so proud of, I have to share it with you because I'm super proud of it. I was almost going to say I can't believe I did it, but no, I totally believe I did it.
Starting point is 00:05:29 It's so, oh my gosh, it's so good. Okay, so here's what happened. You know that back at the end of 2017, I was fired unexpectedly when a CEO I had worked for 14 years, became ill, and he elevated his daughter to replace him. My villain, my number one villain, and she fired me. So anyways, here's how it went down.
Starting point is 00:05:47 She had her assistant send me an email. That was yet again another power play that she would try to implement to make me nervous or frightened or feel fearful of her, like these tactics to be a toxic boss or whatever. Oh my gosh, it's so far in my rearview mirror now that it's just comical. But at the time, it wasn't, right? Like, when you're in it, it's horrible.
Starting point is 00:06:10 I remember I was losing my hair. I was crying when I would get home from work. I was so stressed out all the time. My jaw was cracked. It was bad, really bad. So for anyone who's in a situation like this, number one, there is life outside of it and it's going to be a lot better
Starting point is 00:06:25 when you're away from these negative situations these negative people and negative environments but I do want you to know I'm empathetic I get it I struggled for so long with that woman and it really took a toll on me physically mentally but when you get that space when you fire that villain when you put yourself first
Starting point is 00:06:42 and do what's right for you that's when you set yourself up to take off and take on the world and find your purpose and find your right people right it's incredible And now that I'm on the other side of it, I'm not saying it's easy, right? I wasn't handed a special little box that I opened the day after I got fired and all my answers were inside. Uh, hardly.
Starting point is 00:07:03 No, that really was not the case. But, you know, I did learn so much about myself along the way. I made so many mistakes, right? And then the pandemic really wiped me out. And there's been a lot of challenges. We'll leave it at that the last couple of years. But in the end, sitting here today with you, I'm just, I'm so. clear that it wasn't easy, but it was so worth it.
Starting point is 00:07:25 Right? And that's what I want everyone to know, putting yourself first, not allowing someone to bullying you, leaving a negative situation and trying to fix it, attempting to fix it and address it first before you leave because it is the right thing to do because you do need to stand up for yourself and you need to let someone know when they're not treating you the way that you want to be treated. A few reasons for that is that they might not know that they're treating you in a poor way. Maybe they're going through a horrible time in their life. Maybe they have health issues. Maybe they just lost a family member.
Starting point is 00:07:54 We don't know what's going on with someone. And maybe they're lashing out at everyone. And they just need someone to tell them, hey, I don't appreciate the way that you're speaking to me. It doesn't feel good when you and I sit down and talk. I feel like you're upset or angry with me. Is there something that you want to tell me? Because this doesn't seem to be working the way that it had in the past or, you know, the same way that I typically work with other people. I really want to give you a chance to let me know what's going on.
Starting point is 00:08:18 If I did something wrong, please inform me. Otherwise, I want to talk about how we can move forward in a better fashion. I digress. So I had tried those things with my villain before she fired me. You know, I tried a couple different sit downs saying, hey, is there something that you want to talk to me about? I just feel like you're not happy with me. You know, I went from this place of curiosity. You know, I'm a big fan of it.
Starting point is 00:08:41 I'm sure you've heard me say this before. Hang on, I'm confused. Anytime I'm in a difficult conversation and a business environment, I always go to that one. I'm confused because it's not a task. It's not aggressive. It's not argumentative, but it's going to get that other person to empty their glass, which is always my goal. I want to know what is the other person thinking? What are their challenges? What's their objective here? And is there a way for us to work together on this and find a solution, right? From a calm standpoint, I had tried all these things with this woman, my villain. And it was a game to her. It was so obviously a game. My opinion is she was very, very threatened by me, which I don't blame her. I definitely should have been CEO, not her, but that's okay. Now I'm CEO of my own company. All right, moving on. We're going to take that rejection actually as a redirection to something better, which it was.
Starting point is 00:09:28 Okay. So I believe she was threatened by me. She would never respond in a positive way to my conversations when I tried to empathize with her. When I tried to come from a place of curiosity and find out what the problem was, she would always say, I don't know what you're talking about. Right. So when someone asks like that, there's nowhere to go from there. You have to have two parties willing to find some.
Starting point is 00:09:50 common ground, some form of compromise when you're in a bullying toxic kind of a situation, right? So she was not interested in that. And that's how I ended up in her office on that final day with her, you know, about to tell me she was going to fire me. Meet a different guest each week. Are you ready to take your business as marketing to the next level? Meet Brevo, the all-on-one marketing and CRM platform built to help you connect with customers, boost engagement, and grow your business smarter. With Brevo, you can manage all your customers' interactions in one place, nurture leads with their built-in CRM, reach your audience through email and SMS, and keep them coming back with powerful automations.
Starting point is 00:10:30 But here's where it gets exciting. Meet Ora, Brevo's AI assistant. ORA helps you craft smarter campaigns by suggesting personalized content, optimizing send times, and even analyzing performance data to help you improve your strategy in real time. It's like having a marketing expert on your team 24-7. And of course, Brevo offers advanced analytics, seamless integrations, and AI-driven personalization. Everything you need to create multi-channel campaigns that hit the mark every time. Get started for free today or use code Confidence 50 to say 50% on starter and standard plans for the first three months of an annual subscription. Just head to www.bri-B-R-E-O-O-com slash confidence slash and take your marketing further with Brevo and ORA.
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Starting point is 00:12:26 If your revenues are at least in these seven figures, go to netsuite.aI slash Monaghan, built for the every industry. Ready for every boardroom, netsuite.aI slash Monaghan. You can try to find your passion. When you walk into any meeting, any presentation, any discussion, there are dynamics that go on. There are power dynamics, right? Who sits at what seat at the table? Who's standing versus who's sitting? Who's smiling versus who has a face with no emotion?
Starting point is 00:13:05 With someone's enraged, they're red in the face, right? There's just so many dynamics you can look at when you're walking into a situation in business and life where you want to be aware. Nothing huge, but just notice. So one thing I noticed, you know, she had had her assistant call me over for a meeting, did not disclose what it was for. I did not think I was getting fired. A mic drop, I was. But, you know, I walked in, very uncertain about what I was walking into. She was standing up, which she never did.
Starting point is 00:13:33 She always sat down, right? Typically, if I would walk into a meeting to see her, she would have her glasses on, her calculator out, her notes out, and she'd be working on something when I would walk in. Well, on this day, when I walked in, she was standing, huge smile. which was not her typical disposition, right? She was more of an introvert, not someone that would be standing up with our hands on our hips, smiling. Right, that'd be something more like I would do. Typically, like I'd be running around, you know, super high energy, standing.
Starting point is 00:14:01 Not because I'm trying to make a power play on someone, but because I just do crazy things like that. I prefer to be standing up. You know, that's more my norm and always smiling. So when I walked in and saw that, I noticed pay attention, right? Be aware when you walk into these situations just to notice. And I thought to myself, hmm, this is weird. Why would she be standing all smiles and hands on our hips? And that's when I knew something was about to go down.
Starting point is 00:14:26 And she really was owning all the power in the room, right? Because I kind of sat quietly into the chair. I was a little concerned at this point. You know, I wasn't smiling. I knew something bad was about to happen because she looked so happy looking at me. She never looked happy when she looked at me. Right? This lady hated me.
Starting point is 00:14:44 It was clear. So I knew something not great. for me was about to happen or I thought so right I was just really paying attention to her power dynamics she was trying to you know bring to this meeting and she was right so she's the one speaking she's taking of all the air in the room and she's and I'm saying nothing I'm just sitting there I've been called there and she says well as you know I've been named CEO and so therefore I no longer need a chief revenue officer and therefore I don't need you that was basically it the whole conversation was like a minute or two minutes.
Starting point is 00:15:16 You know, I'm maybe a paraphrase a word or two, but that's pretty much the gist of it, right? It was not, there was not a lot of small talk that day. Not there ever was with her. Okay. So, you know, and this is after a couple years of this woman bullying me, I'm kind of noticing, I'm noticing her, I'm noticing how happy she is. And I'm thinking to myself, this lady has bullied me for far too long. This is just, this has gone on far too long.
Starting point is 00:15:41 The fact that she's smiling in my face right now and getting joy on it. this? No, this isn't sitting right with me. And thankfully, I had been working on my confidence. I had been really intentionally trying to show up as the most powerful, real version of myself and really get my confidence back the way I'd had it years prior. And I'd been working on that for a little over a month before this random meeting popped out of nowhere. Popped out of nowhere. She was named the official CEO and had me brought in immediately, not nowhere. Okay. So in that minute or two, I'm noticing all these power dynamics she's playing.
Starting point is 00:16:17 I'm really a little confused. But then it's like one of those seconds where all of a sudden the damn breaks, right? Like there's just that one, that last pin that drops that puts everything over the edge, right? The whole thing comes down. I just snapped in some way. I just remember thinking, no more. Like, no more lady, are, am I going to sit silently and let you treat me crappy and smile in my face as you're about to fire me? to fire me after I gave 14 years of my life to this company,
Starting point is 00:16:47 and I did an incredible job, incredible, right? The results speak for themselves. I had just won most influential woman in radio. Like, I was it. I was killing it at work. And she was just so happy to be firing me that that was the moment. That was my final straw. And I knew, because I've worked with myself a lot on this,
Starting point is 00:17:08 don't react, respond. And here's why when you react, you're allowing someone to puppeteer you. You're allowing someone else to control you. I don't like that idea. I don't know about you. I hope you don't like that idea. When you give yourself a moment to take a breath and think and then respond in a very calm manner,
Starting point is 00:17:27 you take all the power out of the room. You control the table. And you are in control of yourself, most importantly. So she knocks it out, says, hey, no more cheap revenue officer, therefore no more you. I bought two memos for you to look at. She passed them both in front of me, all three. Miles still standing. And the first memo said Heather's been fired.
Starting point is 00:17:50 That was it. After 14 years, that was the memo she was going to send out to the company. The second memo was this beautiful love letter. You know, Heather Monaghan, amazing employee, accomplished so much in 14 years, more than doubling the company's revenue, blah, blah, blah, going on and on about how amazing I am. And then in closing, it says, Heather has made the decision to go on and do something new and pursue new opportunities. we are cheering her on.
Starting point is 00:18:15 Please join us and cheering her on as well. Basically, here's what this all means. And I've seen the movie before. I had been at the company 14 years. I knew. Once she said I was being fired, I knew what the game would be. She always did this.
Starting point is 00:18:27 You basically bully the person to say, I'm going to send a memo to everyone saying you've been fired. And that's it, which is, you know, many of us will feel shameful or embarrassed or just crappy, like disregarded, kind of tossed away. It's just a crappy feeling, right? not something that you're planning or hoping for. The second option is to write the beautiful memo,
Starting point is 00:18:49 which really gives you the out, right? I'm not going to be at the company anymore regardless, right? She's giving me this beautiful out to go out on top, but in order to get that memo, you have to sign this really lengthy, convoluted, non-disparaging agreement. And what that is for anyone who hasn't had to deal with something like this, basically it's a gag clause.
Starting point is 00:19:08 And so it says, if you sign this paper, you are going to get a very big check. a parting gift, we'll call it. And you're going to get the beautiful memo, too. But you can never, ever again, speak of anything that had happened in or around this company, in or around these 14 years you worked here, in or around any of executives in the company, any of the trade secrets you have, the list goes on and on. I mean, it's so one-sided.
Starting point is 00:19:33 It's ridiculous. So I knew basically I'd be setting myself up for a lawsuit, right? Because if I said anything, this lady is going to come after me because she'd have this gag order, and I didn't want that. But more important that I didn't want that, of course, I wanted the big check. Hello, who wouldn't want the big check? Right? You work somewhere for so long, you set yourself up to be in a place of, you know, financial stability to all of a sudden, no, I'm not going to have a job, which I always have worked my whole life. And then no, the other thing I didn't mention, I had an 18-month non-compete in order to get the CRO job I had to
Starting point is 00:20:06 sign that. So for 18 months, I would not be able to go back and work in the industry that I had expertise in. I had a massive network. And I mean, I had so many, I could get any job I wanted in that industry. But because I had signed that non-compete, for 18 months, I could not compete against the company that was firing me. And so knowing all this, and literally, this is all happening in my head in like 30 seconds as I'm realizing it, because I hadn't planned for any of this. I didn't think she was firing me that day. As I'm thinking about it, all I could focus on, was this lady standing there and smiling. And that was it.
Starting point is 00:20:41 I remember thinking, she's not going to be controlling me. No, I'm not going to react. And you know what? My response is going to take all the power out of this room. So I sat quietly for a minute. And I kept looking at the papers and looking at her. And her smile didn't fade, right?
Starting point is 00:20:56 It was this giant megawatt smile. And it was so, yuck, gross. I remember thinking, not today, Satan, not today. And I smiled. And I said, I didn't write either one of these memos, so I won't be signing either one of them. And if you have nothing else to say, I'm out of here. And I stood up and I took all of the air and all of the power out of that room.
Starting point is 00:21:19 And that woman's face turned beet red and her giant megawatt smile went into a frown. And she had no words. And it was incredible. And that whole meeting was around this concept of don't react. Don't let her control me. Respond. of course I wanted to start crying. Are you kidding?
Starting point is 00:21:38 Of course I wanted to cry. I mean, I fought back tears, but I did it. Right, I just remember, stay calm, stay calm, Heather Brees, like just stay calm. I didn't know what I was going to do, but I'm so flipping proud. And I think that, I should say, I think that I know that the reason why I was able to do this is because that was after years of her treating me badly for so long and me turning a blind eye to that bad behavior. P.S., so this power move that I played was incredible, so proud of it, it wasn't about
Starting point is 00:22:05 banging my fist on the table, screaming at her. How dare you do this to me after I built this company? That would have been one option, right? I could have yelled at her. I could have told her she's a terrible person and that she's impacting me and my son in a horrible way and that this is so crappy and that she's going to fail. All these like things you think of in your mind, right,
Starting point is 00:22:25 of freaking out and blowing a gasket on someone. Of course I thought all those things, but because I had worked on this personally for myself for a while, I was able to do the right thing, which I'm so grateful for, super grateful. I didn't cry. I kept it together and I really stood in my power. And I will never forget how I handled it or I will never forget how I took all the power out of that situation and brought it right with me to my car.
Starting point is 00:22:52 Then I cried for three hours on the ride home. Okay, keeping it real. Just got to tell you. But it doesn't matter. I'm fine with that because it was normal, right? I was really devastated in that moment. But when it counted, I didn't react. I responded.
Starting point is 00:23:04 And so this is for my amazing person who sent this note in today. Okay, we got you. You're in a situation. You haven't been treated with respect. You've been bullied. Probably passive aggressive. This lady is probably intimidated by you. Agreed to all of it, right?
Starting point is 00:23:18 So here's the thing, and we've already talked about this thing, is that you want to respond, not react. You want to remain calm. I'd practice at home, right? Like, you really want to be thoughtful and intentional about how you're going to handle this. And think about the outcome that you're looking for. right? I want a solution. Whatever that may be. It doesn't have to be perfect. But the fact that you're showing up for yourself, the fact that you're speaking your mind, the fact that you're not allowing someone to disrespect you any longer, that's going to create confidence within you. That's going to
Starting point is 00:23:48 help you feel better about who you are. And that's going to start you down a better path moving forward, whether you stay at that company or not, right? Whether that lady stays or it doesn't matter. It's about you choosing you. And I'm proud of you for doing that. So respond. Don't react. Stay calm. practice this at home. And I would, you know, send an email and just ask for a quick meeting. I'd say, hey, is there any chance I can get on your calendar for a 15-minute meeting this week? You don't need to say why. You know, if she says, what's it about, just some communication issues that I wanted to address with you.
Starting point is 00:24:18 I feel like it can be very, you know, basic. And then I'd get really calm. I'd go into the meeting. And I would explain, listen. I'm making it up. Listen, Jen. When I came here, I was told to work with you and that you would help show me the ropes. However, I have to be open with you that I feel like there's tension between us or I don't know if it's resentment.
Starting point is 00:24:38 I'm not sure what it is that I'm feeling. I wanted to ask you, did I do something wrong? Did I upset you? Or is there something, do you feel this too? Or is this in my head, right? I mean, I'd ask that question in some way that's not offensive, but coming from a place of curiosity, knowing that you don't feel good about the situation. You want to be honest about it, but you're here trying to find a solution.
Starting point is 00:24:57 Again, we don't know what's going on this lady's life. She might think you're there to take her job and she's getting fired the next day and she's panicking. We don't know. And you can't answer those questions until she tells you how she feels, right? So I open up the communication. That's the first step. This lady could empty her glass and be like, I'm at the worst time in my life. I'm so sorry that you feel that way.
Starting point is 00:25:16 That was not intentional. We don't know how she's going to respond. She might be the same way my old villain was and say, don't know what you're talking about. I have no idea what you're talking about. When that happens, okay, that's not a red flag. It's a deal breaker, right? And that means, okay, well, I guess this discussion's over then. I do want you to know that I will be respected here at our place of employment.
Starting point is 00:25:38 I will respect you, but you will respect me as well. I guess there's nothing else for us to discuss. Thank you. Have a good day. And walk out, right? Just very calm. Own your power. And then what I would do after that is I'd reach out to the HR director.
Starting point is 00:25:50 I would reach out to your manager, whoever it is, but I'd ask for help. I'd say, hey, listen, I've been having some challenges in regards to communication with Jen. I decided to address them one-on-one. The meeting didn't go well. She didn't see any issue. However, I know in our handbook, respect in the workplace is really important. Communication is important. How can we best handle the situation as she and I working together doesn't seem to be working?
Starting point is 00:26:12 What would you suggest we do from here? Right. So I'd ask for help. So those are the steps that I would initially take and see how it unfold. Right? We can't predict. We can't project. We have to put it into motion, take action and put it into motion.
Starting point is 00:26:23 So best of luck. I'm super proud of you for sticking up for your. I'm super proud of you for not letting this villain to continue her bad behavior. Never turn a blind eye to bad behavior and you are not, which means you are creating confidence in you. Meet a different guest each week. Are you ready to take your business as marketing to the next level? Meet Brievo, the all-on-one marketing and CRM platform built to help you connect with customers,
Starting point is 00:26:52 boost engagement and grow your business smarter. With Brievo, you can manage all your customers. actions in one place. Nurture leads with their built-in CRM. Reach your audience through email and SMS and keep them coming back with powerful automations. But here's where it gets exciting. Meet ORA, Brevo's AI assistant. Orra helps you craft smarter campaigns by suggesting personalized content, optimizing send times, and even analyzing performance data to help you improve your strategy in real time. It's like having a marketing expert on your team 24-7. And of course, Brevo offers advanced analytics, seamless integrations, and AI-driven
Starting point is 00:27:27 personalization, everything you need to create multi-channel campaigns that hit the mark every time. Get started for free today or use code Confidence 50 to say 50% on starter and standard plans for the first three months of an annual subscription. Just head to www.bri-B-R-E-O-O-com slash and take your marketing further with Brevo and ORA. They say that every day your business is late to AI, you fall to. days behind. But how do you keep up? The competition is only moving faster. Fortunately, there's NetSuite Next. You probably know NetSuite, the AI-powered business management suite that securely connects all of your data. It's a unified suite that brings your financials, inventory,
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Starting point is 00:29:02 If your revenues are at least in these seven figures, go to netsuite.aI slash Monaghan, built for the every industry, ready for every boardroom, netsuite.aI slash Monaghan. If you're in back-to-back meetings all day, you know the struggle. You're nodding along, contributing, trying to stay present, but in the back of your mind, you're secretly stress scrolling your memory for what was just said, or who's supposed to follow up on what? Meetings are a mess. Granola fixes that. I mean, if you've ever left a meeting thinking, that was productive, but now how do I get
Starting point is 00:29:39 on top of all this and actually execute on it? Granola is game-changing for you. Granola is an AI-powered notepad built for the way real people actually meet. Here's how it works. You take rough notes like you normally. would and in the background granola securely transcribes the meeting then it turns everything into clean structured useful notes when the meeting ends granola has completely changed the game for me i have so much more time i am so much more efficient and anytime you get confused about something you can go back
Starting point is 00:30:10 and look at the actual transcription there are no more mistakes we've changed the game with granola if meetings are eating up your day granola is a no-brainer you can try it totally free just have head to granola.a.a.ai slash confidence. That's granola.orgna.comfiance to get your time back. Try it for free at granola.orgia.comfiance clear. I ask you to try to find your passion. So I get a message from a gentleman and it says, and this is on LinkedIn. Hey, Heather, I've read your story. I know that you got fired. I just want you to know what's happening to me right now. I am struggling and trying to hold my head up. However, it's not easy.
Starting point is 00:30:54 Okay, I totally get it because I felt the same way when I was in the moment when it was all happening. But here's what I know now. Wait a minute. No, getting fired means you are in good company. Mark Cuban was fired. Oprah Winfrey fired. J.K. Rowling fired. Steve Jobs fired.
Starting point is 00:31:09 Heather Montingham fired. You are rolling with the top, the best of the best. Choose to see this as your jump-off point. Did you really love? Was it your purpose and life to be there? Probably not. Peel back that onion and say, wait a minute, I didn't even really like work here. Why am I sitting here crying? Wait a minute. I'm just afraid of the uncertainty.
Starting point is 00:31:29 But here's the thing about uncertainty, guys. When everything is uncertain, anything is possible. Stepping into that uncertainty, embracing it and saying, I'm excited. I have no idea what's about to happen next. That means it's going to be different than this Groundhog day run that I've been on for a year or two years or 20 years. Who knows? This is exciting. I'm taking my unique skills and talents somewhere new.
Starting point is 00:31:53 I have no idea what that's going to look like. And that's why I'm jumping up and down to walk out the door in my house every morning, embracing this opportunity. This is like once in a lifetime, rebirth. Here we go. This is my jump-off point. Right? So that's kind of how I see it versus how he's seeing it right now.
Starting point is 00:32:09 And I said to him, you need to read my books. You need to listen to my podcast ASAP because it's important in those moments when you're really challenged, really down, like getting fired or breakup or whatever. it is and you're doubting and questioning yourself, it's critical who you surround yourself with, not only the people in your life, but the podcast, the books, you know, the content you consume, the media, really, you've got to curate this. I talk so much about this in my new book, Overcome Your Villains. It's the three-step process to overcome any adversity, beliefs, action, and knowledge.
Starting point is 00:32:41 So I'm talking right now about this knowledge piece for him that, you know, who are you letting into your world? And this is like, I see you critical time right now, right? Intensive care. You're in it. So be that protective of you that you're not letting anyone into your circle, into your head, unless it's someone who is cheering you on, supporting and encouraging you, someone who's light years ahead of you that's showing you the way.
Starting point is 00:33:05 Those are the people you want to surround yourself with. Fire all of the villains. And I promise you, if you were fired from that company, it's because you weren't the right fit anymore. It doesn't mean anything bad about you. It has nothing to do about you when that woman fired. me, she should have fired me. She was threatened by me. You don't want to be working side by side with someone you think is going to take your job. She should fire me. Then I'm not the right fit for her.
Starting point is 00:33:29 And here I am, you know, four years later outside of it. And I'm saying, what a gift. She, she was right. I shouldn't have been working there side by side. I was diminishing myself trying to make her feel comfortable. And that is the wrong answer. So stop shrinking the fit in the places you've already outgrown. The only reason you're freaking out is because you don't know what's on that other side. But I'm here to tell you, for me, there was my first book, Confidence creator, and my speaking career, and interviewing Sarah Blakely live on stage at a sales conference, and my TEDx talk getting promoted to TED, and me launching my podcast back in 2019,
Starting point is 00:34:06 and me signing with HarperCollins leadership, and me taking these massive stages all around the country, right, helping so many people. There's been so many blessings that have happened, and they all started with that one domino falling that day. day, the one domino that fell was that old life went away when I got fired. The old must fall away in order for the new to arise. Don't see it as an end.
Starting point is 00:34:31 This is just the beginning. Okay, if you love this show, I need you to tag your girl at Heather Monaghan. Share it on social media. And when you do, you get a chance to win the audible version of Confidence Creator. And yes, I narrate it. I love it. You're going to love it. It's so good.
Starting point is 00:34:48 or you can win the, there's another audio version of my Overcome Your Villains. I give this backstory at the end of every chapter. It's not an audible. Maybe it's on Google Play. I'm not sure which one. But post, tag me, share that you love the podcast. And when you do, you're going to hear from me or someone on my team. And you are going to get an audible or audio version of one of those two books.
Starting point is 00:35:12 So please support the show. You sharing the show, even with just one person, helps so, so much. you have no idea. Please share. Please encourage others to listen. Until next week, I'll be creating my confidence, and I know you will too.

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