Creating Confidence with Heather Monahan - Confidence Classic: The Truth About Confidence, Criticism, and Real Legacy with Dr. Wendy Osefo

Episode Date: June 3, 2025

This episode is deeply personal. I open up about the recent passing of my longtime mentor and friend, Bob, and what he taught me about legacy, leadership, and living with intention. I’m also joined by TV personality, educator, commentator, and Real Housewife Dr. Wendy Osefo. She shares how she navigates public criticism, imposter syndrome, and the pressure of high visibility. We dive into what it means to be confident under scrutiny, how to reframe insecurity as part of your growth stage, and why being authentic will always outweigh being liked. Tune in and own your confidence. In This Episode, You Will Learn The mentorship that changed the course of my career. How to own your identity and shake off imposter syndrome. Why every confident woman still has insecure moments. How to have conversations across political divides. What balance really looks like as a working mom. Tips to manage decisions, set priorities, and say “no” without guilt. Resources + Links Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/monahan Download the CFO’s Guide to AI and Machine Learning at NetSuite.com/MONAHAN. Want to do more and spend less like Uber, 8x8, and Databricks Mosaic? Take a free test drive of OCI at oracle.com/MONAHAN. Get 10% off your first Mitopure order at timeline.com/CONFIDENCE. Get 15% off your first order when you use code CONFIDENCE15 at checkout at jennikayne.com. Call my digital clone at 201-897-2553!  Visit heathermonahan.com Sign up for my mailing list: heathermonahan.com/mailing-list/  Overcome Your Villains is Available NOW! Order here: https://overcomeyourvillains.com  If you haven't yet, get my first book Confidence Creator Follow Heather on Instagram & LinkedIn Dr. Wendy Osefo on Instagram & Twitter

Hey there or love it, people are gonna say something. And that's why when I was thinking about going into the show, I said in my life, whether it's being a professor or being a commentator, I leave with authenticity. I'm always true to who I am. Like I never go in there. Like I know people even in the Polo co-realm,

they don't believe what they're saying. They're saying it because they know it will get attention or because you know, they're being a voice or mouthpiece for someone. Everything I say I believe. And even in for someone. Everything I say I believe. And even in the classroom, everything I say I believe. So I say that to say, was shooting the show, I came into it with the same mindset. So if you don't like what you see on the TV, I'm okay with that.

Because it'll be different if I was faking or I was pretending to be somebody and then I'll say to myself, oh, man, I wish I was just my authentic self. Maybe they would have liked that. No, you get what you get. And so I'd rather be hated for who I am than loved for who I'm not. So this is who I am. If you don't like it, move along.

Come on this journey with me. Each week when you join me, we are going to chase down our goals, overcome adversity and set you up for a better tomorrow. That's in your seat over there. I'm ready for my close-up. Hi and welcome back. I'm so excited you're back here with me today. Thank you. Okay, so oh my gosh, as if the hits just keep on coming around here, we've got a hurricane heading

for Miami right now and I'm so sad to share with you that my long time mentor and good friend, Bob passed away yesterday. And I'll tell you, when you deal with so much sadness, as I know you are, right, we all are, whether it be from being in quarantine, just dealing with the pandemic, the news, losing a job, getting furloughed,

panicking about what's happening to our economy and our world, the news, losing a job, getting furloughed, panicking about what's happening to our economy and our world, the political situation. There's so much going on and having people close to you that you lose during this time. It's just, ugh, it's crushing. As you know, we lost my son's dog two weeks ago and then losing Bob yesterday. It's just, ugh, I lost it. So I wanted to share what I learned from him. I think it's really important. And he's the only guy that ever taught me about this. So I want to teach it to you because I want his legacy to go on beyond him being here.

So I got into the radio business. Oh, my gosh, I was so young. Maybe I was 23. Anyhow, I ended up moving to a publicly traded company, became the VP of Sales and EVP CRO. Okay, during that time, I was back and forth to New York a lot, working with one of our vendors, our partners out there, which was our national rep firm. And at the time, he happened to be the president of one of the divisions. So he was very, very high up, much more senior than me.

And he represented essentially the industry, I represented one company. But for whatever reason, he was always kind to me. He was really into data and research, and I didn't know much about it. So I was super interested. So I would always ask him questions. And of course, we know people love when we're interested in them and their work. So he would take me into his office and share, you know, presentations with me and data and teach me. And it was so nice, so generous with his time. And so we built a friendship and a camaraderie years ago, more than a decade ago, probably 15 years ago. And over the years, we would stay in touch, talk on the phone, text, email, whatever. And then when I was in New York, I'd always stop by and see him. And then the CEO of that company died and the new CEO wanted him out. He didn't want to work for him.

It was a complete disaster. And Bob left. Bob found himself in transition, which I know a lot about. We all know a lot about transition these days. So he called me and said, Hey, what do you think about me being your consultant, which I was super excited for? Number one, I'll take any help I can get. Number two, I already loved this guy. He was so helpful to me and so different from me. So I thought it would be a great compliment. So I

brought him on as our consultant. Eventually I ended up hiring him as my right hand. When I became CRO, I promoted him to VP of Sales. So a little weird, right? He's 20 something years older than me, tons of experience. And some people thought that was odd, but I trusted him. I really liked him. And I saw value in him that could add value to the team. So we worked together and things were good. But whenever we would spend time alone together,

I would want to get into the specifics of revenue generation, what's going on with losing clients, what's happening with different categories of business, all the normal conversations you would have around revenue. And he would always change the conversation to two things, legacy and footprints in the sand. And I remember when he first did this with me and I would think so weird what he talks about, right? I thought it was so strange and I didn't really understand. I would appease him and listen to whatever he had to say.

But eventually I started to get, I understood his point that there's more to life than just work and it's really about what will we leave behind when we're gone. And when I had thought about that before, I would think about my son, right? So you know, that's the legacy you leave as your children. But he was there was more than that. He wasn't saying just your kids, which he was a great father and was huge fan of his kids and his family and his wife.

But his point was you can leave so much more and we've learned so much and have so much to offer that we've got to do our part to leave our footprints in the sand to help others and to help the generations that are coming behind us. I hadn't really thought much about that prior to those conversations. So he really got me, you know, to start thinking about it. And then, of course, fast forward, I end up getting fired. And during that time, everyone was hiding from me, not wanting to speak to me in my old industry, because I was odd man out, and the company that fired me didn't want people talking to me.

But Bob would keep messaging me, and he would DM me, and message me, and email me. And I didn't want to talk to him because I didn't, I was so confused at first when I got fired. Who do you trust? Who was in the know? Did they let me hire him? Cause they wanted him to replace me. You know, I had all these fear questions at first and I was so paranoid and I was just in a bad spot. I wasn't thinking clearly fast forward from there. I ended up out in LA with my podcast and I wanted to get some

press and coverage to expand my reach and I have a huge network of people I know in the radio business. So I called the head of iHeartRadio for the West Coast. His name is Kevin and we didn't really know each other well but we knew plenty of people in common. He took the meeting. I went in to see him and I wanted him to you know put me on Ryan Seacrestrest I wanted to go on all of his shows Ellen K I want to coverage on everything because I want to blow my show up course go big or go home and He was very gracious However, he was not saying yes, and I said listen, what is this gonna take?

You know, are you kidding me? Like don't you know me? Don't you know who I am? We've been in the same industry for forever and he said well, I mean, I don't you know me? Don't you know who I am? We've been in the same industry for forever." And he said, well, I mean, I don't really know you, Heather. I know of you, but I don't know you. I mean, who could I talk to that we know in common that would vouch for you? And I had heard he was a big fan of Bob's, but I didn't know because remember, I hadn't been answering Bob's calls for about a year now. I had kind of shut him out. I did. I didn't respond. I, you know, I shut those people at that company out and, oh, so anyhow, Kevin said, what if I call Bob? He said, I trust him and I trust his opinion. And if he thinks I should help you,

then I'll do just that. So he calls Bob. And wouldn't you know, Bob said the nicest things in the world about me Don't want to get into it cuz I'll start crying. So He said Heather Bob vouches for you He loves you and would do anything for you and he told me to do whatever you wanted So Kevin started helping me and we started working together and he was amazing So great and got me on so many shows and was such an advocate for me, had me come in and speak to his employees and just he was so

great at promoting my book and just my podcast. He was just such a, he became a great friend through Bob. So then he said, well, you know, I got to reunite you back to Bob because Bob never wanted to hurt you. Bob was never part of this and you need to trust me on that. And I said, I do. So he reconnected us and there we were back again talking and Bob forgave me for disappearing on him and things were just back to normal. So then for the next couple of years,

we stayed friends and would talk once in a while, text and email again. And he was super supportive of me. He was the same person that he always was to me. And he was sick. He had cancer. But when I tell you this guy was six, seven, good looking, in great shape, smart, eloquent, so together, so positive,

I just never thought, you just never think who is gonna disappear. And about a month ago, Kevin had reached out to me to let me know he didn't think he was doing very well. And so I reached out to Bob and he sent me this note and said, Hey, I've been working on a book, kiddo, would you look at it and let me know what you think? I think it's going to help a lot of people. I think it can help me leave the footprint in the sand." And he sent me this outline for a book and it was awesome. Of course it was awesome. He's such a hard worker and such a stand up human being

that of course it was awesome. It was so good. And he never got to bring that book to light. So he had a story in him to tell. He has teachings in him to tell, and he never brought it to light. So when I heard from Kevin last night that he had passed away, I was sobbing on my couch for two hours thinking about this. And the first thing I did was I text my son because he was with my his father, my ex-husband. I text him, where is the stuff that Bob sent you? I need to know right now. And my son kept saying, why, why, why? And he told me where it was. And then he called me

and he said, what's going on? And I told him Bob went to live in heaven. And he said, oh, mom, are you okay? I know how bad this hurts. I know how much you loved him. And my son loved Bob too. He had been such, he got us tickets to the NBA All-Star game. He got my son all these autographed NBA things, a letter from the head coach, the Clippers. Like he just done so many cute, sweet, thoughtful, amazing things for my son because they had that passion for basketball in common. And he talked to my son a number of times on the phone and met him and they had hit it off. So I went and found the letter that Bob had sent to him and all the stuff he had sent him and just went through everything.

I read the outline for his book again last night and I was sitting there so sad and it hit me. You know, I was so focused on, geez, he has this book that he needs to bring to light and it never made it. And I'm one of the only people that ever saw it and I want this book to be made and this isn't fair and then I realized something he had always talked to me about legacy and the legacy you leave and that's when I got it. Legacy isn't something you leave behind that's tangible like a book. Legacy is something you leave behind within others. And that's when I understood his legacy lives within me

and always will. And I will do my part to keep his legacy alive. I will write about him in my book, which will come to life next year in 2021. Thank you, HarperCollinsLeaders leadership, I will keep his legacy alive. And that was a really amazing realization that I had for the first time last night, I was so focused on it had to be like a product or a book or, you know, a movie or a documentary or

something, but it just has to be the passion and teachings that you instill and kindness and love and support that you instill in others so that they can carry that on on your behalf when you're gone. They can spread that message when you're gone, which I'm committed to doing. I am so committed to that. So what is your legacy and are you leaving footprints in the sand? I can tell you for sure that I am, and I can also tell you that this pushes me even more to do more, to be more of a mentor, to be more of an inspiration, to work harder,

because this man was the hardest working person in the world, and that's all. That's what I had to say. But please answer that question for me. What is your legacy? And if you don't have one yet, if you haven't thought about it yet, Bob's challenging you too.

Bob wants you to leave the footprints and so do I. We'll be right back. Meet a different guest each week. Hey, Bob, it's a turn. Confidence created. Hi and welcome back. I'm so excited for you to meet my guest today, Dr. Wendy, who's an award-winning researcher.

Dr. Wendy is a Nigerian-American television personality and progressive political commentator. She's a contributor to The Hill, founder and CEO of the 1954 Equity Project and professor of education at the Johns Hopkins University. Oh my gosh. You're also, you've got a show on Radio One. You've got a BA in political science from Temple. I mean, you're, you've got a PhD in public affairs.

Your bio is probably one of the most impressive of anyone that I've had on the show. And I'm blown away. So thank you for making time and being here today with us. Thank you so much for having me. So I wanted to start with, I met with Bravo a couple of years ago about doing a show with them and I ended up walking away and we never made a deal. One of the reasons why, and I'm so curious about this for you, was I was so concerned

with building credibility in life, you know, being a mother, reaching a level of quote unquote status or, you know, societal approval, and then losing it as a result of immersing yourself in something that some people might think would shift away at everything that you've built. Did you have thoughts like that when you considered this? I did think of the negative connotations that naturally come with reality shows and what that could imply,

but the truth of the matter is you have to be authentic to yourself. Those shows cannot define you. You actually have the ability to define those shows. And I think it's really interesting because a lot of people have said to me, I think that just having you on the show in a sense is elevating the franchise, right? Who I am and what I am is something that can never be taken away from me. Whether you see a camera on me as I'm hanging out with my girlfriends and you know we're having a few drinks and you hear me say something

witty or smart, that doesn't negate the fact that I'm constantly in these streets marching for black lives. It doesn't change the fact that I'm speaking truth to power when it comes to politics. It doesn't change the fact that I'm the first black woman to receive my PhD in my department. Those things can never be taken away from me. It's sort of the argument as women that we face that is often said, you know, you're

beautiful, but you should dress differently so people can take you seriously. If the way you dress can take away from your brains, then that doesn't make any sense. So that's what I look at it as. I could be completely wrong, but who I am and what I've done can never be stripped away because of social choices I make with my girlfriends. No, and I don't do anything crazy. I'm really not, you know, there's some crazy things, but I don't do anything crazy.

So you just get to see my fun side. Well, I think that's a great analogy and an excellent point that no one can strip you of your accomplishments, your experiences, and who you are. And as long as you know who that is, you're fine with whatever else happens outside of you. And to me, that really sounds like confidence. Would you describe yourself as being confident? I think I'm confident. I think I also struggle with some of the insecurities that a lot of us face, right? Even, you know, you listed also my degrees. At every stage of me receiving one of my degrees,

I suffer from imposter syndrome, thinking everyone around me is so much smarter than me. I'm not supposed to be here. So I have a sense of confidence that I carry with me, but there are times and there are days where I just walk around and say, uh, you know, am I biting off more than I can chew? So I rely heavily on my family to give me strength and to say, you got this.

But most of the days I do walk around with my head held high saying, you know what, you're a bad bitch. You deserve to be here. Good for you. You bring up the fraud mindset, which I think specific to women is much more common than with men. And I personally had that at one point in my career, too. How did you push yourself into those moments when you started wondering, oh, do I really

belong here? Am I fooling myself? How were you able to jump over that chasm that a lot of people can't make that leap through? You know, my background is Nigerian. I come from a Nigerian household. And the reason I preface this statement with that is because growing up in a Nigerian household,

you're always being raised with different parables, as I like to call it, right? And so one of the parables that my dad always used to say is, you know, in life, we have two stages. There's a stage where you will become two stages. There's a stage where you will become a mentor, there's a stage where you'll become a mentee, and you have to know where you are in life and what stage you currently are at. And the reason I say that is because a lot of times in my life I would question myself and question, you know, should I be here? I would

reassure myself and say, yes, you're supposed to be here. You're just not at the stage where you are the mentor yet. You're still learning. You know, this is your learning phase. And so I think that instead of us to say, we're not supposed to be here, let's walk away, we have to look at it differently and say, we're not necessarily experts yet, but we are still supposed to be here. This stage in our life is a learning stage. And in this learning stage, I will gather all the information I can get and hopefully one day I will be an expert

and then my role will change from a mentee to a mentor. So I've been able to reframe my thinking and just look at life differently and say whenever I'm insecure about my positioning, it's not that I'm not supposed to be here, but rather I still have a lot to learn in this space and to take up space and learn that thing. I am so taking that from you and I of course will be foot-killing you on it, but that is,

that's the most articulate, concise way to really explain how to make that jump and connect really well with that message. It makes so much sense to me and it's so interesting that idea of mentor or mentee and how it can change in different places in your life. This just happened recently I have to share with you. I got a message on LinkedIn from a much older very successful CEO male and he sent me a note saying I'd like to mentor you. I was moving fast I have a mentoring program I flipped him a link to my mentoring program I said great sign up here and I thought he was reaching out to me wanting me to mentor him just assumed so and he wasn't and so anyways

this is interesting when he got that he was very confused but he said you know what maybe I could learn something in some space I don't know about. He signed up for my program. And he basically is living what you just articulated. He said, I thought, well, I don't know why this woman would be able to teach me anything, but why don't I try to see if I can be the medte?

And it's been a really, it's been a great program with him. He's brought a lot of learning, but he's learning a lot too. Yeah, and it's really to your point. So thank you for bringing that up. That's amazing. Yeah, a humble person. And I was a little embarrassed that I did that

after I heard the whole story, but what are you gonna do? That's super cool. So one of the things that I wonder about, not only with the political side of, you know, being a political strategist, commentator, and now adding real Housewives, to me there's a lot of opportunity for being polarizing or controversial just based upon being in those fields currently, you know, obviously with the political year, obviously with Black Lives Matter, there's so much controversy in general happening.

And I know a lot of people are afraid to even have the conversation, afraid to say the wrong thing. You're walking into those moments every single day. How do you approach that and manage that? You know, I think it's always interesting, you know, because even outside of those hats, I'm also a professor, right? And I have students who come from various

political backgrounds, and they have different political ideologies. And I've done a very good right? And I have students who come from various political backgrounds and they have different political ideologies. And I've done a very good job of, you know, situating myself in the middle and saying, I have my own political views, but I think what's most important here is for all of us to be civically engaged.

And that's what's the most important to me. Whether you are on the left side of the aisle or the right side of the aisle, that is your complete, you know, right as a citizen. But the worst thing to do is not to have engagement. And that's where I am always situated in the middle. And I say to people, these are my personal views.

These are my personal political views. And it's rooted in my background, my upbringing, and things like that, and just things I've read. But it doesn't mean that we should alienate each other. My closest friend in the political sphere is actually someone who sits on the different side of the aisle from me. And we learn so much from each other. And I say that to say, I think that people make politics a nasty word, but it's really not.

Like I learned so much from other people and I just wish that we would remove all of the, just the cattiness that comes with it. It's okay if you sit on the other side of the aisle, let's all make this country what it should be together. And that's my kumbaya story story I guess, I don't know. It's a good one to hear because it definitely isn't the norm that I see and I was around a few friends the other day for a socially distanced birthday party and one woman brought up Black

Lives Matter and specifically the riots and immediately I could feel my body shrink back. I didn't even want to engage in the discussion for fear of, for fear that I would say the wrong thing, fear that she'd get angry, fear that I didn't do enough and I'd be called out. And there's this sense that you, back to politics as well, that if you engage in the conversation and this goes sideways, everyone's going to be pissed off and it's going to end in an argument. And I've seen it unfold so many times that way that it's almost, you know, a learned behavior now that, oh, don't get into that conversation versus someone, if you know going

in, someone like you is open to that's your opinion and that's your right. And, you know, I'm happy for you that you have that cure is mine. And maybe we can see some middle ground. So how do we get people to stop arguing or how do you detract from the argument when people started? Well, my first question to people, if I find that they sit on the same side as me or they sit on a different aisle as me,

my first question is why? Why do you believe that? Because sometimes people don't know why they believe or they vote for a certain political party. They just say, oh, I'm this. You know, I'm a Republican, I'm a Democrat. And I challenge people all the time and I say, why? And it's just a simple question,

but at least for a conversation, it'll say, I was raised in a blue collar town and my blue collar town, this happened, or this president gave a stimulus. Like there's always a story. And if there's not a story, it makes people start to think, OK, why do I believe this political view? So I always start with why.

I am an educator at heart. That's what I am. I'm a professor. So I come to people at the very root of every issue, and we build upon. I think the thing is when people say Black Lives Matter, you may already think, all right, what when people say Black Lives Matter, you may already think, all right, what do I associate Black Lives Matter with? And so because you said that,

I know the type of person you are. Or if someone says, I'm a Trump supporter, someone may say, okay, because you're a Trump supporter, I already know who you are and what you think. No, just simply take things to the basics and say, okay, you're Trump supporter. Cool. Why? Tell me why. And that throws a lot of people and say, okay, you're Trump supporter, cool, why? Tell me why. And that throws a lot of people off guard because they think you're gonna attack them. If you say Black Lives Matter, you know, some people may be like,

why you don't think all lives matter? No, just say, oh, Black Lives, oh, okay, why? Educate me, you know? And when you start having conversations like that and taking out the antagonistic nature of it, it's simple. It's like, okay, tell me why. nature of it, it's simple. It's like, OK, tell me why. Oh, OK, that's why.

Well, let me tell you why I believe what I believe. And then they're like, no one has ever told me that. No one has ever talked to me like this. It's usually, you know, banter, and you're stupid. You're this, you're that, and we don't need all of that. Like, tell me why, and I'll tell you why. We can move forward. And then have a glass of wine.

I like that approach. I'm going to use that. I'm definitely using that one too. You just tell me why first while I sit over here and don't argue with you. When you think about businesses growing their sales beyond forecasts like feastables by Mr. Beast or even a legacy business like Mattel, sure, you think about a product with demand, a focused brand, and influence-driven marketing, but an often overlooked secret is actually the businesses behind the business, making selling and for shoppers buying simple. For millions of businesses, that business is Shopify. Nobody does selling better than Shopify, home of the number one checkout on the planet and the not-so-secret secret, the shop pay that boosts conversions up to 50% So secret secret, the shop pay that boost conversions up to 50%

meaning way less carts go abandon and way more sales going. Business that sell more sell on Shopify. The secret's out. It's no secret. Businesses that want to grow grow with Shopify. Upgrade your business and get the same checkout. You need this. This is what I use. I mean, it is unbelievable. It's so incredibly easy Shopify makes selling simple and Shopify helps you raise your

revenues sign up for your $1 per month trial period at Shopify.com slash Monahan all lowercase go to Shopify.com slash Monahan to upgrade your selling today Shopify.com slash Monahan. I ask you to try to find your passion. Why is mito-peer important to you? Let me give you a few examples. I feel so much stronger in my workouts. I'm recovering quicker.

I have more energy. I want to proactively preserve my health, mobility, and strength as I get older. I want to support my cellular health. This supplement can help because it supports your health at the foundation by encouraging cellular renewal. Mitopure is a precise dose of the rare post-biotic Urolithin A. It works by promoting an essential cellular cleanup process that clears out dysfunctional mitochondria, aka your cells' battery packs.

Mitopeer is the only urelythin A supplement on the market clinically proven to target the effects of age-related cellular decline. With regular use, you'll see and feel the difference in the form of improved energy levels, better workouts, faster recovery, more endurance, and more, all of which will help you achieve your New Year's goals. PS, Mitopeer is shown to deliver double digit increases in muscle strength and endurance without a change in exercise when this is your year

to be your best, most energized, most revitalized you. MITOPEER promotes cellular renewal and mitochondrial health to address common signs of aging at the root. Cellular health is a foundation of wellbeing and longevity. MITOPEER recharges your cells, supporting any goals by helping all of your systems work better. MitoPeer is research-backed innovation that unlocks your fullest potential.

Awaken the strength, power, and resilience already in you with the first and only supplement clinically proven to rejuvenate health at the cellular level. Timeline is offering 10% off your first order of MitoPeer. Go to timeline.com slash confidence. That's T-I-M-E-L-I-N-E.com slash confidence. I asked you to try to find your passion. Around the topic of Black Lives Matter,

myself specifically, and I know for other people as well, didn't know what it meant. So when it first, and I know it's been out for years however I was ignorant it I wasn't educated on I didn't I didn't know and so when these conversations became massive in the past few months at first I was thinking well that doesn't sound very nice because why wouldn't everybody matter and I definitely thought that and and as I learned more I've learned a lot and as for all the good information you can get out there

sometimes there's really bad conspiracy theories which I'm sure you hear many especially this year with everything that's going on and so it's trying to discern what is actually real legitimate factual information for quote-unquote fake news and just conspiracy theory? That's been challenging, I think for a lot of people. Absolutely, I agree with that. And I think that, you know, if nothing else, I've had a few friends who have said that this year,

they've just educated themselves and they've learned more about people, about organizations. And I just think that that's really important. So, you know, when people are saying black lives matter, it's not because, you know, white lives don't matter or, you know, the lives of other people don't matter, just simply saying, we feel as though right now black lives are under attack.

I cannot remember in my mind when I have seen a police officer kill a white man on tape. I cannot, I cannot, like I can't, but if you ask me, have you seen a police officer kill a black guy on tape? I could say, yes. I could literally say Philando Castile. I could say George Floyd.

I could say Rashad Brooks. I could name these people's names. And so I just think it's important for us to have these conversations, not because white lives don't matter. We're just saying that black lives are currently under attack, and that's really what it is. And I had these conversations with my friends.

I was saying this the other day. My son was invited over to one of his classmates' houses. Everybody's in quarantine. Let's get together. And the mom said, you know, you guys should come over. Just got him a new, you know, warder gun and all this other stuff. And I had to tell my child that he couldn't go

and he didn't know why. And I said, because I don't want you playing with a gun. My sons, they're seven and five, I have never bought them a toy gun. That may seem foreign to people, but that's because you have incidents like Tamir Rice. There was a 12-year-old black boy who police pulled up that he was playing with a toy gun.

They thought it was a real gun. Before they even looked at him, they killed him. He was 12. He wasn't doing anything. He was just playing. And that was it. My sons will never have the privilege to play with a toy gun. Like, that whole story of, you know,

the Christmas story with the boy, his mom said, you'll shoot your eye out. Yeah, that's not relatable to my family because no one in my family that I can know of great, great, has ever owned a gun. And the only person who did was my grandfather because he was a police officer. We don't own guns because people will think

that you're gonna kill them. So that is just something that says, that's how our lives are different. My son wants a super soaker, no you can't get one. So just simple things like that, like just the bare things that make our lives different, but we live in the same country. And I just, you know, sharing stories like that

with my friends and them sharing different stories with me have just really made this time period one of learning, not just for white people, but also for black people. Like we're all learning. And as long as we continue to learn with open arms, I think that this country is on the right track. Absolutely, I couldn't agree with you more. I didn't know that you had a family member

that had been in the police force. And that's really interesting to me because of all the work that I know that you had a family member that had been in the police force. And that's really interesting to me because of all the work that I know that you're doing for equality and for the situation that we have with police and taking a very hard look at policy and how can we fix these issues. What is your thoughts on defunding the police? Is that something that seems to be coming very popular recently? Yeah, I think it's interesting when people say defund the police and what it means.

It's like this whole notion of, I don't know if you ever heard of, you know, No Child Left Behind. I believe that was like one of the acts. And everyone was like, yeah, you know, that's a great thing, No Child Left Behind. Nobody really read the policy, because if you read it, it's really like, it's really bad.

But because of the name, right? So defund the police doesn't necessarily mean like we want to defund the police you know i'll actually go further that was my grandfather that i mentioned my brother is actually a police officer currently so i have police force so every time i speak out people always want to attack me like you hate police no my brother puts his life on the line every day. But defunding the police for me, Wendy's definition, it simply means that we give so much money to police. We need to start giving that money and allocating it to different entities. It doesn't mean police won't have. It's just that police have so much, like the point that sometimes when you see things going on, you see them riding down the streets in tanks. Why are we militarizing our police when we have schools

that don't even have books that are older than the 1970s? In Baltimore, they don't even have air conditioning for students when they're in school during the summer months. But police officers are equipped with all types of stuff as if they're going to war, and they're not. So for me, defunding the police is not something necessarily that I'm advocating for. But I am saying that when we look at public service entities, they should all be equally yoked as far as finances. That's it.

I want kids to go to schools with books that they can read. And they're not, you know, kids are getting kicked out of school because they owe a lunch balance of $2, $4. But you're giving the police like $10 million. Why don't you take $1,000 and pay off all lunch debt so children are not getting kicked out of school? It's just all about equity. And I think that those conversations need to be had

about how we're spending our taxpayer money. Do you see those conversations happening now at a higher frequency because this is an election year and because of the outrage? Yeah, I think everyone is putting everything on the table now because it is an election year. And the election year is usually a tense time. I'm thinking back to 2016.

I remember when that election was going on. It's usually a tense time because everyone who feels as though they have been left out of the conversation starts knocking on the door and saying, excuse me, you forgot about me, as they rightfully should. If you are going to vote for someone, they should work for you. In a sense, our elected officials should work for us. We're voting for you because we believe you're going to make our lives better, whether it's by enacting policy or whether it's by restricting policy. So I think that election year is just a time that everything bubbles up. I think that right now is just a

really tense time in our country because it's an election year and we are also in a pandemic. And, you know, that is just mixing and everyone is just tired and exhausted people are dying you know so much going on this year so this year is going to go down in the history books definitely that is an understatement oh my god for better or worse i'll tell you it's so this sounds so minuscule compared to what's happening in the world, but it just, my son, little dog died two weeks ago. And it was, it was his first experience with death, right? And it was so interesting to me in that we have all this death happening all around us, as we all do. But if your individual home has an experience, it's nothing like when that death

comes to you, you know, and that experience. And it also reminded me how jaded we can get, I'm saying me as an adult versus him as a 13-year-old child. You know, in my mind, I thought, oh, that poor dog and my poor son, but I know that we will move on and life will go on. And my son doesn't know that. And watching him go through that grief and loss really made me feel so much more sensitive around

what everyone is experiencing right now. Yeah. Oh, that's so sweet. Oh, no, I feel that because my children, we have a dog is their first animal. She hasn't passed. She's still here. But our children, they have adopted birds and we have like a bird house and all that other stuff.

And they were playing basketball, the ball rolled into the field and the ball laid beside the body of one of the birds and my son was terrible my five-year-old was like blue Jasmine and started screaming her name I was like oh no they didn't take it that hard but that was their first time I think I even heard him say she's dead and I've never heard you know it's like you take it that hard, but that was their first time. I think I even heard him say, she's dead. And I've never heard, you know, it's like, you know, it's hard. It's hard. Oh, my heart goes out to your son.

Give him my heart. Thank you. Thank you so much. He's starting to do better. So thank you very much. What does the future hold for business? Ask nine experts and you're going to get 10 answers. Bull market, bear market, rates will rise, they're going to fall. I mean, really, can someone just give us a crystal ball and break it all down for us?

Until then, over 38,000 businesses have future-proved their business with NetSuite by Oracle, the number one cloud ERP, bringing accounting, financial management, inventory, HR into one fluid platform. With one unified business management suite, there's one source of truth giving you the visibility and control you need to make quick decisions. With real-time insights and forecasting, you're peering to the future with actionable data. When you're closing the books in days, not weeks, you're spending less time looking backwards and more time on what's next. If I had needed this product,

it's what I would use. Until then, over 38,000 businesses have future-proofed their business with NetSuite by Oracle, the number one cloud ERP bringing accounting, financial management, inventory, HR into one fluid platform. With one unified business management suite, there's one source of truth, giving you the visibility and the control you need to make decisions. Speaking of opportunity, download the CFO's Guide to AI and Machine Learning at netsuite.com slash monohan. The guide is free to you at netsuite.com slash monohan. netsuite.com slash monohan. at www.bill.com slash Monaghan. Meet a different guest each week. Pay the money to change. Confidence cleared.

Attention renters, if you haven't heard of BILT, you're about to thank me. Earn your favorite airline miles and hotel points through BILT just by paying your rent on time. Let me explain. There's no cost to join, and just by paying rent, you unlock flexible points that can be transferred to your favorite hotels and airlines, a future rent payment, your next Lyft ride, and more. When you pay through BILT you unlock two powerful benefits. First, you earn one of the industry's most valuable points on rent every month. No matter where you live or who your landlord is, your rent now works for you. Second, you gain access to exclusive neighborhood benefits in your

city. BILT's neighborhood benefits in your city. Built neighborhood benefits are things like extra points on dining out, complimentary post-workout shakes, free mats or towels at your favorite fitness studio, and unique experiences that only built members can access. And when you're ready to travel, built points can be converted to your favorite miles and hotel points around the world, meaning your rent can literally take you places. So if you're not earning points on rent, my question is, what are you waiting for? Start paying rent through BILT and take advantage of your neighborhood benefits by going to

joinbilt.com slash confidence. That's J-O-I-N-B-I-L-T dot com slash confidence. Make sure to use our URL so they know we sent you. JoinBuilt.com slash confidence to sign up for BILT today. Let me guess, you'd rather get a root canal than shop for car insurance? Yeah, you're not alone. It's a total headache. Quotes all over the place, confusing coverage, spam calls from companies you've never heard

of. You'd think it was designed to be that frustrating. But it doesn't have to be. There's a smarter way. It's called Jerry and it's not just another comparison site. It's the only car insurance app that does the hard work for you. Start to finish. Jerry makes things easy by handling the entire insurance shopping process in one place. It's a seamless start to finish experience from comparing quotes to getting covered. To get started, just

answer a few simple questions once, and Jerry instantly compares quotes from over 50 top rated insurers. No endless forms, no jumping site to site, no sales calls, just clear, personalized options you can trust with 24 seven support. Jerry even cancels your old policy for you, which means switching is made easy.

And it doesn't stop there. Jerry keeps working for you by automatically shopping and alerting you to better rates all year round. So you never have to stress about overpaying for car insurance again. It's like having a personal car insurance expert in your pocket, minus the sales pressure. Jerry helps you keep your data secure. No telemarketers, no selling your number. Unlike the other guys, they prioritize your privacy, sparing you the annoying flood of

calls from insurance sellers. Jerry has helped more than 5 million customers find the best car insurance. In fact, Jerry users can find rates as low as $87 a month and drivers who save with Jerry save on average $110 a month. I use this and you should too. Let's be real. Shopping for car insurance is right up there with waiting for the DMV or assembling Ikea furniture. Don't go that route. Stop needlessly overpaying for car

insurance. Drivers who save with Jerry save over $1,300 a year on average. So before you renew your policy, do yourself a favor, download the Jerry app or head to jerry.ai slash confidence. In just a few minutes, you can compare quotes and coverage from up to 50 top insurers. Jerry car insurance made simple, smart, and finally on your side! Based on drivers who switched and saved with Jerry over the past 12 months, over 20% of drivers who switched with Jerry found a monthly premium of $87 or less. Not all drivers find savings. Jerry.ai slash confidence.

I asked you to try to find your passion. You bring up your kids and you know, you're a mom and you're an educator and you're dealing with pandemic, how do you balance all of those things with being a political strategist, commentator, with now taking on real housewives? What does balance look like to you? Wine, wine, wine, wine, wine, wine, lots of wine. No, okay. Okay, no, no. What does balance look like to me?

Balance looks like, and I'll say this, and it may sound crazy, balance looks like failure, and I'm okay with it. Meaning, I know I cannot balance at all, and I know I cannot be 100% in all things at all times. And I have learned this year and a little bit of last year to be okay with that. If my son has, you know, a big project for school, and that's what we're focused on, that's what my priority is this week.

So if I have to cancel some of my hits for TV because my son needs me, then so be it. If I have a week that is a big debate that's coming up and I have to study for it and make sure I have all of my talking points, then that week Grubhub is going to be my best friend and I may not be mommy of the year cooking dinner. So balance means me realizing that some things I'm going to have to put to the side for just

a short period of time until I handle upcoming deadline. And I'm okay with that. Before I used to do it all, and I have a daughter that just turned one, and I literally, like, beat myself over the head just to make sure, because I know she's my last one, and I just wanted to make sure I breastfed her, and I had to go to one. And so many times, I wanted to stop

because I would have to pump before a segment. I would pump in between takes. As you guys see on Real Housewives, there's, like, times where I'm, like between takes. As you guys see on Real Housewives, there's like times where I'm like pumping. We traveled to Portugal and I brought back like over a hundred ounces of milk, like a psycho from a foreign country. I don't get it.

But I just feel like I always run myself into the ground, trying to make everyone else happy, that I realized in order for me, Wendy, to be okay, I have to be okay letting go of some responsibilities and not being super mom sometimes. Oh my gosh, I remember. I was the same way with breastfeeding and feeling like it was my obligation

and that pressure and the craziness. Oh, I feel you on that one. So I'm so glad your year is up. Over, I am so like, no, if I hear another breast pump machine again I will kick it down the freaking road. I hate it. I can't do it anymore. It's not a good sound if everyone listening has not heard it. I'm not advocating for it. It is brutal and if you were the person that was ever sitting next to me on an airplane while I was just touching. God bless you. Absolutely. Oh my God. That wasn't good. All right.

So tell me how, I know a lot of people struggle with committing to something. This is the example you just gave. Your son has a big project coming up. He needs your help. You had laid out a number of different shows that you were committed to doing and now you've got to go back to them and tell them, I can't do this. How do you approach that conversation? Oh, that's a great one. How do you approach that conversation? Oh, that's a great one.

How do I approach that conversation? Well, honesty, I always try to have a middle person. I'm an escape goal type of person. Like, listen, I can't do it. And so I'll have, you know, my publicist or someone like reach out and like, oh, something came up. It is not necessarily good, but I'm a stakeholder for calendars.

So I try to avoid those conversations. Like when the school gives out the calendar for the year, everything is in my calendar. So I give myself 24 hours before, 24 hours after, because if this is the date for the spring concert, that means we're gonna have to practice. We're gonna have a wardrobe, you know, make sure the wardrobe works.

So if the spring concert is on a Wednesday, then I check out Monday. So Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday is all you know, for me. So it's always about managing and my husband and I we sync out calendars. He's super busy as well. He's an attorney. So he has a million things going on. So we always try to, one of us is always present. We try for both of us to be present, but we always have one of us present. And it's worked so far.

So fingers crossed that it continues to work. Well, I am impressed because you guys have definitely have a full plate. What kind of advice do you have for other working parents knowing that there's a very high probability that we're going to be teaching our kids at home yet again starting this fall and as an educator is there any advice that you can give us? If you can and and why I say if you can because unfortunately there are finances tied to everything right but if you can start looking for help now. Everyone is like literally scrambling because things are gonna happen and spoiler alert if your school is going to open still look for help because the moment God forbid one

child one teacher comes in contact with the virus that school is probably gonna shut down so that's just a spoiler alert for everyone. Like, don't say, oh, perfect, my child's school is gonna open, get to go. No, you're good to go for now until, God forbid, something happens, and then they start all over. And we see that happening even now with the states.

Like, you saw states opening up, beaches were open, everyone was fine, but then the cases start to rise and they had to shut everything back down. They're definitely gonna do that again with schools. And if you can, my thing is really great is if your child has friends in school and you are talking to those parents, see if you guys can come together to have one person, like a tutor, hire a tutor, and split the cost amongst five families.

It'll be so much cheaper. So it'll be like a mini class, except they're doing it with their friends and it's still virtual. So those are some tips I would say is one, be prepared for the worst possible outcome, even if the outcome looks good now. Two, try to find some help ahead of time. And three, do cost savings if you can by sharing that cost amongst other families if possible. Okay I'll be on that as soon as we end this podcast today. Here's somebody. I don't have that just laid out yet. I'm definitely getting on that. Okay so two real housewives this is season five and it's your first season. What are your thoughts walking away

knowing that you're going live now? Oh my goodness, I am a nervous wreck. It's weird because it's something that you do, like we filmed last year, so it's something that you do, no one knows about it, so you leave it, the next day your life is almost like back to normal, right, like you're done shooting the season. Now it's like everyone is about to watch this show.

Everyone is going to be invited into your home. Everyone is gonna have opinions. You may say something to do something, you think you're 100% right, and then the audience is looking at you like, oh my gosh, she's a great age psycho. So it's like you are opening up yourself to the court of public opinion,

and that is something that is not for the weak or the faints of heart. I'm glad that I've done some TV before, so I know what that's like, because I've come off of TV after doing commentary, but I killed that. My points were like solid. And I get these emails like,

where did you get your doctorate? You're so stupid. I'm like, damn, I thought I killed that. So I have had those comments all the time. So I say that to say, I'm a very humble person. So I am nervous to open my life, my personal life to the court of public opinion, but it was a fun ride.

So I enjoyed myself. It was good. Some of the women on the show you've known before and have been friends before, did any of them give you advice or advise you when you were considering coming on or tell you what to expect? No, no, no, no.

No and no. So the reason I say that is my reaction and the way I reacted is very organic. Maybe like, and why I say no, I know for sure before we started filming, okay, well maybe one person, one person, one person in all fairness. But my whole point of saying that is it wasn't enough. It's like, it's basically like someone telling you if you go into the water and your head goes under the

water, just hold your breath. And you're like, okay, that makes sense. And then they push you into the damn Atlantic Ocean. It's not the pool, it's the Atlantic Ocean. So it's like, okay, I need different tactics here. So they gave me great advice, but it wasn't anything compared to what I was about to go through. It was pretty intense. It was very intense.

Yeah. Well, I've only seen the trailer, right? The promo trailer, which I shared with you, I thought was very intense. Yeah, well, I've only seen the trailer, right? The promo trailer, which I shared with you, I thought was so good and it looked so drama-filled that I can't wait for the show. But even just getting to know you a little bit, having read about you and immersed myself in your background, you come across very different

in the trailer than you do in real life. Really? So how did I come across on the trailer? Well, the moment on the trailer that caught me was when you were going back and forth with another woman and she called you Wendy and you said, that is Dr. Wendy. And you called this woman out in front of everybody without missing a beat. It just doesn't seem like the same person. It's not, it's really not.

It's so funny because my zodiac sign is a Gemini and I feel like true to form, I have two personalities. I have like, you know, Wendy that's just super goofy, silly. Like I swear my seven year old and my five-year-old, we're on the same mental capacity when I'm home, because I'm just so silly with them and so goofy. And then I have my other side, which is like, I'm a boss. Don't play with me.

And I think she brought that out of me. And it was so weird, because after it happened, well, you guys are gonna see, after it happened, I was just like, oh. Like literally in that episode, you guys are gonna see me go through like Wendy being this person and Wendy going like, oh, that was nice.

It's like the weirdest thing. It takes some time, but eventually you will see that side of me. It's so weird. I'm so weird. Yeah. Do you get a chance to watch the actual episodes and see how they edited everything before we get to see it? Yes and no. They edited it. The season's done. Everything is done.

But before you guys see episode one, we get episode one like two or three days before you guys see it. So I don't know what episode two is So I don't know what episode two is. I don't know what episode three is. I have no idea. So I have 48 hours to prepare myself for people calling me a psycho. That's it, I have 48 hours.

Okay, so now that you've seen episode one and you know that someone somewhere will come out and be a hater and say something, it's just the nature of the beast. How do you respond to that or how do you prepare yourself for that? You don't, you don't. You have to know that, you know, people hate it or love it.

People are gonna say something. And that's why when I was thinking about going into the show, I said in my life, whether it's being a professor, being a commentator, I leave with authenticity. I'm always true to who I am. Like, I never go in there. Like, I know people, even in the Palo Alto realm,

they don't believe what they're saying. They're saying it because they know it'll get attention or because, you know, they're being a voice, a mouthpiece for someone. Everything I say, I believe. And even in the classroom, everything I say, I believe. So I say that to say, with shooting the show. I came into it with the same mindset So if you don't like what you see on the TV, I'm okay with that, you know

Like because it'll be different if I was faking or I was pretending to be somebody now say myself Oh man, I wish I was just my authentic self. Maybe they were like that No, you get what you get. And so I rather be hated for who I am than loved for who I'm not. So this is who I am. If you don't like it, move along. Oh, I love that.

Oh my gosh, I can't wait to see the show. So excited to see it. And I'm super excited. Oh, thank you. Excited to be on it. Oh, thank you. I'm super excited to be on it. Oh, thank you. I'm super excited for now. We'll check back in a few weeks to see

if you still feel the same way. Yeah, absolutely. Perfect, perfect, perfect. How does everybody find you, Dr. Wendy? You can find me on all social media platforms at Wendy Osefo. Well, thank you so much for being here and we're looking forward to seeing you on Bravo.

Yay, thank you for having me. Hang tight, we'll be right back. I asked you to try to find your passion. I hope you loved meeting Dr. Wendy as much as I loved interviewing her. I have to tell you that I didn't know what to expect with her. I didn't know her previously and I'm so happy I had her on the show. She's not what I expected and she really dropped some major knowledge on me and I hope

on you too. So hopefully you enjoy meeting her and learning from her. I thought she was great. Okay. So sometimes I get DMs on Instagram from people, just super nice notes, feedback, you know, not always. Sometimes I get some crazy lunatic haters. But yesterday I got super nice note from someone telling me to keep up the good work and that they're so proud of me. And then the person said, you know, you can manifest and create anything that you want. And I wrote back, I thought that was so interesting. Like really? Do you have some inside track that I don't know? And a PS, please explain. So I wrote back any tips on how to do it?

Manifesting is something I'm learning about but I'm not a master. And this was interesting. He said many tips, but first start by creating a morning ritual instead of waking up and going straight to your phone. Also imagine that you already have what you want and manifest it.

And this was interesting to me because I had worked super hard on this a while ago and like with anything I'm going nine million different directions and back when I was really leaning into my speaking business I had this whole thing written out and I used to read it every single day and it was all about how I'm the top speaker in the U.S. and I am making millions of dollars. All these really crystallized specific goals. And I would read it every day as if it was done, real and happening. And I've forgotten about it since the pandemic hit, because number one, that is impossible right now. Right. So just reminded me that this person sent

me that note. Hey, I need to get back to that. I need to get back to putting out to the world what it is I want and what it is I'm going for and making happen because God knows I am going for so much and making so much happen. But why don't I get back to that simple practice that takes a couple of minutes a day that seemed to have been working great for me before pandemic hit, you know, why not implement that now? So I challenge you to think about what are some of the good things, good practices that you had in place before pandemic that maybe you've forgotten about and maybe manifesting is one of them. And if it is, let's go, let's do it together. Let's put it back in motion. I am so doing it. I'm back in.

We need to get back to the grind in the most positive and supported way. And I really believe there's nothing bad that can come from it. There's only good that can come from it. So giddy up, let's go. And we all need some good. Okay. Today, oh my gosh, wouldn't you know, this is so crazy. My life is freaking crazy. Even in pandemic, it's crazy. So I used to work with a young man years ago. I was in radio. I was a VP of sales at the time and I sort of took this young man under my wing. He was very rookie, very young and I just could see he didn't know what he was doing and he wasn't getting the support he needed I actually forgot about that

He told me today and I took him under my wing and I started working with him and I started going on sales calls With him and teaching him because I wanted to help him and I thought he didn't know he was doing and he worked for it He was in my company, right? He wasn't my direct report, but he was in the organization. I was running. Okay, so He ends up leaving a couple years later. I don't remember why this is a long time ago and So he ends up leaving a couple years later. I don't remember why. This is a long time ago. And fast forward to, I don't know, a month ago, he reaches out to me on LinkedIn and now he's a VP of sales for a company.

And he wanted to bring me on to be a keynote speaker for his sales team, which is in Singapore, Brazil, London, and Miami. And it's a publishing company. And I was so excited. I said, oh my gosh, this is fantastic. And yeah, let's work out logistics and whatnot. But if possible, if we can make it work, I'd like to do it. So we ended up working everything out.

It was great. And today was the day I had to give the speech. Remember, my mentor died last night. So I cried like crazy yesterday. I did not sleep that great last night, obviously. I was really upset. And then this morning I was crying again too. So I just decided I'm not gonna do my hair or makeup.

I don't even care. And I know that sounds so lame, but typically I really try when I'm doing an event, right? Even from Zoom I try. I decided I'm just gonna tell them the truth. And I did. And I started crying a little bit at the beginning of the meeting. But then I really got into my talk and I became my powerful speaking version of me.

And it went killer. So good. And we did a Q&A after and it was great. And they were all going nuts. And so I was super pleased with how everything went today, considering the mindset and mind frame I was in with having just lost my mentor. So I was really proud of myself. And I also said to myself, what would Bob say if he was here right now? I said that to myself this morning and I know what he would say, kiddo, come on, let's go.

You can bring value to them. You can support and help them. You can teach them. This can be part of the footprints in the sand you're leaving, you need to show up for me. And so that's what I told myself. That's what I did. I kept it real and told the truth and then I went all in and delivered and I'm super proud of myself doing that. So yes, some days are really freaking hard. Some are harder than others. But when we put our best foot forward and remember the why's, why are we doing this? You know, why are we showing up? Why are we sharing our message, our teachings? Why are we in this situation? You know, I remembered him and that pushed me to show up this morning and I might not have looked my best, but I killed it.

So I was super proud of that. Okay. So one of the questions that I did a Q and A at the end, and one of the questions that came up is an interesting question, cause it keeps coming to me, so I have to address it again. One of the people asked, how do you say no to things? And it's such an interesting question because no is a complete sentence. No does not need to be explained. No does not need to be described or justified.

No. And here's the thing, the more that we're at home, the more that our schedules are crazy, the more that we're in back-to-back Zooms, the more we're gonna have to start saying no. And I've totally made that pivot and I'm saying no to so much now, where at the beginning I wasn't,

I was just taking anything and everything. But as we begin to determine where is the best use of our time, where is our best ROI, our return on our investment or return on our time, ROT. And that's how we can make better decisions. We need to evaluate. If sitting on the phone with your friends in the middle of the day isn't paying dividends,

probably not the best use of your time. You know, so you need to figure out for you, where is your time best spent? Working out for me, check, check and check. I've got to do that or I lose my flip in mind. You know, so I've learned over time that's a priority. What are the other priorities? Revenue drivers building up the funnel of pipeline of people

I can sell products and services to. Like there's a number of different things. And when I get breaks, I want to expand my brand, expand my message. And I'll go as a guest on to other podcasts or, you know, say yes to other opportunities. But very often now I am saying no. And I don't apologize for saying no. I'll say something like, unfortunately, my schedule is completely full and I don't have time right now to be a guest on your show. Would love to touch back on this in six months and see if things have changed. Thank you for considering me. Just something nice like that. You don't have to, you know, get in the weeds on it. Just unfortunately, that's not going to work right now, but I

appreciate you asking. And that's fine. That's fine to say no to people. So it's really about figuring out what your priorities are, constantly reevaluating them because mine keep changing. When I first launched the mentoring program, that was my priority and filling the pipeline for the next month. But now the executive coaching program is paying better dividends and that's becoming more of a priority. So things are changing. Plus my Harper Collins deadlines are coming up.

So the book is becoming a priority. Plus we're making the decision to launch more podcast episodes. So that's changing in priority. So it's this constant evaluation at the beginning of each week of, okay, do I have free time this week? Where, you know, should I allocate that free time? Is it researching click funnels? Is it researching, you know, SEO? Is it researching Shopify? Or is it being a guest on a different show? Or is it you get the point point spending more time figuring out who my next guests are constantly reevaluating because those are moving targets and in the world we live right now everything is changing so quickly that we've got to constantly reevaluate what we're doing and

sometimes you just want to hang with your kid. So make those decisions say no without an apology. You don't need to feel bad and you don't need to justify it until next week. And by the way, our new shows, hopefully they're live by the time you're hearing us or they're coming live right while you're hearing us this same week. Can't wait to hear back from you on that. Let me know if you like the new shorter episodes that we're adding in. We're going to be running three episodes a week till we get feedback from you on if you like them and please let me know if you like the topics we're covering, if you'd like to see something else covered, let us know and we will make it happen.

Here's to creating confidence in your life and mine until I see you next time. I couldn't be more excited for what you're gonna hear. Start learning and growing. Inevitably, something will happen. No one succeeds alone. You don't stop and look around once in a while. You could miss it. I'm on this journey with me.