Creating Confidence with Heather Monahan - How To WIN When They Say You Won’t, With Daphne Jones CEO & Founder Of The Board Curators & Fortune 50 Technology & Business Leader Episode 279

Episode Date: December 20, 2022

In This Episode You Will Learn About:  The key to identifying transformational changes you need to make to your central business strategy How to break through barriers and take your success to the next level  You will get Daphne’s playbook which took her from secretary to the C-suite leading a 12B business  Resources: Website: www.daphneejones.com  Read Win When They Say You Won’t Join The Board Curators course  Email: [e-mail]  LinkedIn: @Daphne E. Jones  Instagram: @daphnejonesofficial Twitter: @DaphneEJones Overcome Your Villains is Available NOW! Order here: https://overcomeyourvillains.com  If you haven't yet, get my first book Confidence Creator Show Notes:  You have the power to become EXACTLY who you want to be! It’s time to STOP letting labels define you and start defining yourself. When someone tells you that you CAN’T accomplish something, you’re talking to the WRONG person. Daphne Jones, founder of The Board Curators, joins me so we can start looking at our losses as lessons, and continue growing! Dream big and don’t allow other people to define your success.  About The Guest: Daphne Jones has over 30 years of experience in general management and executive level roles at companies like IBM, Johnson & Johnson, and GE. She currently oversees the $13 Billion segment of healthcare at GE and serves on the board of directors at AMN Healthcare, Barnes Group, and Masonite International Corporation. Daphne recently started her own company that prepares leaders to serve on boards, reach their goals, and transform their careers!    If You Liked This Episode You Might Also Like These Episodes: Let Go Of Scarcity & Let In Abundance With Author & Podcast Host Cathy Heller  How To Live FEARLESSLY With Heather!  Get in Touch With Your INNER COMPASS With Wayne Dyer’s Daughters, Saje Dyer & Serena Dyer Pisoni  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Crunch. The key part that stops us sometimes is we get bad news. We get emotional or we may cry and I say think of what a business does when they lose market share. What do they do? When a business wants to expand, like open up another branch or another, go another region. What do they do? When an app has a bug in it, what does the developers do?

They use tools to get them from where they are to where they want to be. I'm on this journey with me. Each week when you join me, we are going to chase down our goals. Overcome adversity and set you up for a better tomorrow. After no sleep, I'm ready for my close-up. Hi and welcome back.

I'm so excited for you to meet our guest today. Daphne Jones, she's got over 30 years of experience in general management and executive level roles at Get Ready For It, IBM, Johnson and Johnson, Hospira, GE, but began her career as a secretary. At GE, she served as SVP for future work, SVP and CIO for product engineering, imaging an ultrasound and a senior executive in CIO for global services,

all of which composed a 13 billion with a B segment of GE Health Care. Joan's service on the board of directors for AMN Health Care, Barnes Group, and Mace Knight International Corp. And as the recipient of numerous domestic and international awards, she recently started a company that teaches leaders how to prepare to serve on boards. Daphne, thank you so much for being here today. May you're my new best friend. Hi.

We have been living right down the street for the time. Yes. This is crazy, but a small world. Yeah, we need to go to that park that they just built, you know, right there on fifth. Yes, it's beautiful. It's so nice. Let me two days. All right, Daphne, let's get right into it

because the fact that you started out as a secretary and have achieved so much massive success, my first question to you is, at some point, there had to be a pivotal moment where you're seeing yourself at this level of secretary and support staff. What was it that changed for you in your mind that allowed you to think that you could go for more than that? Sure.

Great question. But I do want to make sure that folks know here's how I became a secretary. Limits and labels were replaced on me. I asked my high school counselor, you know, it's time for me to go to get ready for college. What do I need to do to get ready? He says, Daphne, black girls, like you don't go to college, they become secretaries.

And I can send you to a secretarial, we call it college. It was only two weeks. And then you can learn how to be a secretary and then we'll place you or they'll place you into an organization. And so they did, I did that. And they placed me into

Women's Day magazine. And it's funny, had their Women's Day magazine is a Women's magazine, but it was run by all men. So all white men sitting in their offices and then a couple of us secretaries, somewhere black, somewhere white, that sat out there outside of our principal's office. And so I was lousy, and that was the turning point was, you know, he dictated some things to me. I knew how to do shorthand, and I typed really, really well, but I just, it just wasn't good. I didn't do a really good job.

He was always yelling at me, the snide comments that they made, the jokes that they were making about the women was just really hard. And I said, you know what, I don't know what they do, but I feel like I can do what he's doing if I Just go to college. So I don't think I should be a secretary anymore. I should have a secretary. Yeah, that's it. And I decided that even though that, you know, I went to college, got three years, you know, ambassadors degree, got my MBA in one year. And I realized at that point that the audio didn't match the video.

You know what the audio of what my counselor was saying didn't match what I actually did. The movie that I was living and I found that I could shape my own narrative and call my own place when I found that I could go to college and win as he said that I would not be able to do. You never found it or you didn't think to yourself because I know I've been told many times when I was in Korpon America that I could only reach a certain level of success and not to fool myself. And I struggled a lot with that in Foster syndrome when I would try to start pushing beyond it.

And then I'd have the negative self-talk like, wait a minute, who do you think you are? Everyone's told you can't do that. Did you have that same type of situation when you pushed yourself to go into college or did you just leap and never look back? I actually at that moment my mom was a Jamaica immigrant and Jamaica was under the British rule for until 1950 maybe 62 or something like that. And so she would always say to me, Daphne, you're not black, you're British because we were under the British rule. So that's how she looked at things. So she would always say to me, Daphne, you're not black, you're British, because we were under the British rule. So that's how she looked at things.

So she was always into, you can do it, be excellent. I skipped first grade, for example. And so all my life, she was always pushing me to be the best and to study hard and hearty boys, books and Nancy, Drew, mystery books, and all those. I was always reading. And so up until my counselor, I had run ins with, you know, gangs that would beat me up for, you know, racial assault and things like that.

But somehow I was able to brush that off, but it wasn't until I went to IBM, I was laid off by IBM. I was downsized. And it was at that moment, and IBM was my first job after college, and that was my dream job. And with the fact that they laid me off, made me say that they, whoever they is, would realize, and or realize that I was really just a secretary in an IBM pinstribe suit. And I was afraid they were gonna send me back. And send me back where to being a secretary. I had to ask myself,

were my achievements up to this point where they real, or was I fooling people. So after realizing that it's really a conditioning that we have gone through, women, minorities, we go through, it starts when we're young and the job of the conditioning is to plant seeds of doubt, seeds of inferiority, seeds of gratefulness that somebody gave us a chance.

So when that seeds turn into a full grown plant, it doesn't produce much fruit, or the fruit is underdeveloped. And so yeah, I did go through various bouts of that, but you realize that you have to tell yourself, just like I tell my son what they need to hear. I am great, I am creative. I have super powers and a cultural

advantage that my company has yet to uncover or appreciate. So it was a mindset like my mom started me out with of winning and I found that whoever has your mind has you. And so it just comes through practice and application that you realize that the audio will not always match the video. This guy who was an expert at coaching and counseling children or kids like me was wrong. So that means other people who say things about my inability and for me to minimize my voice and to hide my culture and to underpay me and to underdevelop me. They're also wrong, but it takes practice and surrounding yourself with people and books

who will give you life enhancing words and speak words into your spirit that continue to boast to you and lift you up. Wow, I love that you just pointed out that that one man was wrong and because he was wrong, it means all the rest of these people could be wrong to that.

It's super powerful, Daphne, and so true. You are incredibly confident. Have you always been this way your whole life? No. Oh, my man. I was an ugly duckling. In fact, my first name is Daphne, and they called me Daphne Duck. And I think I walk kind of like slew footed

or whatever like a duck does. And so first of all, for so physical issues, lack of confidence. And being a woman of color, I was beat up by a gang of white boys. I've been told even in my later years that I dress too nicely or all kinds of things that have been said to me. And so it's really mind over matter.

I look at you driving your car that windshield is huge, right? But your rearview mirror is really small. So I don't want to look at my past a whole lot and it's smaller, it's receding into the background, but my windshield, my future has got to be bright. And so it's really a mindset that's really what it amounts to. So no, I haven't always been confident, but I've always known that I've done tough things before. I've not done some things great. You know, I never was perfect and I was never always awful. And so when you realize that

there have been times that I've done things for the first time and it worked out well, it kind of gives you that confidence, as you mentioned, not to be cocky, but to be sure. When he told me that it was impossible to go to college, I realized that the word impossible really should become inevitable. If you can think of it, it's not impossible then, it's just a matter of time. So my vision, my purpose is not denied, it's just delayed for a moment. So you just kind of get it at mindset of talking yourself out of that funk

that we might find ourselves in. Oh, that's so good. All right, so you were laid off from IBM and I personally, I was fired, not laid off, but for a lot of people, they take an ego hit, a real emotional hit when you're separated from your line of work, your paycheck, your title. How are you able to bounce back from that? My book is sort of built on these steps of, you know,

envision, design, iterate and transform. And the first thing I did was I had my family around me. I had my sister who was with me in Atlanta, Georgia, where I was working, and I had a son, and I was going through divorce at that time too, Heather. It was so, I said, how am I going to be able to get custody of my son when I don't have a job? It was really tough.

But my sister was with me, and we are Christians, and a lot of prayer and supplication, and with Thanksgiving at the same time allowed me to be able to get through that. And I said this boy who how old was Jared, eight years old maybe seven, he's depending on me. And so it's like when you have somebody depending on you and you know how that is, depending on you for everything,

I said I can't quit. I gotta keep going. And, you know, I've skipped grades in college, I've done well before. This is a setback and they say, my friend Willie Daly says that a setback is a set up for comeback. And so I had to look at that and say, this is just a set up for how I'm gonna come back.

And I did. And so I ended up moving from Atlanta, moving to Newark, New Jersey, where I joined with Public Service Electric and Gas, PSC and G. It's the utility in New Jersey. I was there for a short time, but it was a time that changed a lot of my life because from there, somebody at Johnson and Johnson discovered me. And then from there, I just went on. So you just don't look at that loss as a loss. You look at it as a lesson and you say,

well, what did I learn from that? I'm too young and even though I started getting cuter as I got older, wasn't cute earlier. I said, I'm too cute. I'm too young to give up. And so I said, I gotta keep moving. And this baby is depending on me to win. National security experts are warning.

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Well, one, we have a market. Whether you're a hedge fund manager or a CFO, there are people that you serve and support. Products provide solutions. Services provide solutions. Products have value. I am valuable. I have a price and I heard you talk about a $300,000 talking gig that somebody was doing, they have a price, right?

So products have a price, products have competition. And so there's somebody that's always looking to unseat you, right, and take your spot. And products get feedback from the market. And so, and finally, products have to remain relevant. And so they don't become obsolete or don't get moved down to a lower shelf in the grocery store. And so one of the things that I do with my edit process and edit actually means change, right, the word edit, but it is also the four letters that says, I need to find a way to have an ongoing cycle of success. I believe that my book and the edit process is an antidote, a self-administered antidote

to the poisons that are hurting our careers, right? And so the things that cause us to lose our mind in our careers is that we don't envision where it is that we want to go. We don't have the right type of mindset. I talk in the book about a growth mindset versus a fixed mindset, a mindset that doesn't believe and impossible, but leaves inevitable. A mindset that does not ask for permission to prosper.

So we get into the mindset because once you have that mindset, my book provides the rest of the tool sets that you can then use as a product, as a business would use, and then you have that skill set for life that you can use over and over again as an antidote. So first, it's the ambition, that's the eat. The deed is when you design.

So now I know what I want to do. I get into what we call bomoes and nose, bodacious objectives. I think sometimes we may not succeed as we could because we just got too many things going on. Everything's urgent and not enough things are important, but we do those urgent things. So I kind of have you sit down and say, what are my bodacious objectives? Then most important one or two? And so you design a plan, we get into OKR's, objectives and key results, just like a business does. We don't take our situation personally, even though it's happening personally to us. We use business-like tools and methodologies to be able to look at our situation and manage through it.

So you design your plan of action. You look at what I call the 5Fs, which are when I was going through my career at IBM, I only focused on one F and that was furthering my career. But then there's your fitness, your faith, your finances, and your family. And so we talk about how you look at those other foundational things. So make sure that when you create your plan of action, you've made a plan that takes into account all of the things that you care about, not just your career.

And then once you have your plan, then the third step is you iterate. You go into the market, you work your plan, and then you get feedback. You see it was working or it's not working. When it's working, you keep on going. That's what we call perseverance. But when you find that your plan is not quite perfect, you then go back to your plan and redesign it and you pivot a little bit. You never quit because your goal is still your goal.

So you then, you iterate. You go back to your design and you make it better. So we use the Agile methodology, because I'm a former techie developer programmer, we use the Agile methodology that allows you to get real-time feedback from the market. And then you adjust your plan ever so slightly or ever so largely in order for you to make it.

And then, once you've done, whether it's a microchange or a macrochange, you transform and you sit with that change, you learn the job, you learn the thing, you transform it and then you then go look for what your next win is gonna be. And so that's edit, envision, design, iterate and transform. I love the process, I love the methodology. It's simple, it's directive, and anybody can put this process

into motion, correct? It doesn't matter what job they have. Yeah, and it doesn't have to be a job. If you want to be a better wife or a better mother, if you want to help your child do better in school, if you want to lose weight and get healthier, if you want to start your own company, the steps are the same.

And I think the key part that stops us sometimes is we get bad news, we get emotional or we may cry. And I say, think of what a business does when they lose market share. What do they do? When a business wants to expand, like open up another branch or another, go another region. What do they do? When an app has a bug in it, what does the developers do? They use tools to get them from where they are to where they want to be. And we use in my book things like the SWAT analysis. You will look at, what do I have going for me?

What do I have going against me? You know, plans of action. We'll look at Johari's window. What are my blind spots? If you don't know what your blind spots are, trust me, somebody does. So it really doesn't matter what you want to do. What matters is that you want to do it, and you want to look at it from what you're doing to what you want to become. And so we go from, you know, they say that we are not human doings. We're human beings. And so what is it that we as human beings want to be? Because a lot of us are just doing things today, but we need to look at what we want to become.

Wow, that's so powerful. I love that you brought up taking a motion out of it. What are some of the tips that you can give people to? Because I've seen countless meetings, even in business where people have lost their cool, definitely reacted not responded. What are some of the strategies that people can implement so that they can remove

emotion from business or from, like you said, even being a better mom or wife or in their fitness. Right, right. So one of the former chief HR officers, one of my companies said to me, because I'm a very inclusive communicator, I just wanna tell you everything, right? At one time, or I'll ask a lot of questions.

And he said to me, Daphne, you need to wait. And I said, wait, what am I waiting for? Somebody coming? What's going on? And he said, wait means why am I talking? So the first thing that we have to say is when we're in a room with with other men who may be talking over us, who may be repeating what we said, we just need to just take a deep breath and wait for a moment. Gather our thoughts. And then in my book, I talk about what do you do, I think the chapter is internal politics or corporate politics or whatever. So one example is when a man says something that you just said 10 minutes ago, he seems to get a standing ovation.

They're like, yeah, John, that was amazing. And so then what you say is, John, I think you articulated my point really, really well. In fact, let me make another point to add on to what I said earlier. And so you give him credit for articulating your point, but you don't give him credit for having the point and the first tag on place.

But then you take it back and then you add another point on top of it so it is solidly your point. And so there's things that you do as a woman if they want you to take notes. Daphne, can you take the minutes of this and that used to when we had flip charts and stuff? And I said, no, I'm a lousy writer. You really don't want me.

I don't say anything about, oh, because I'm a woman you want me to, no, I just, I make it non-gender-specific. And then they'll learn, let's get somebody who's the best writer, not someone who's the best woman. And so there are just things you just have to think about as a business and not respond emotionally. When a company loses an employee, they quit their job.

The company does not go banging on the door of that new company that person went to work for. They look back and they examine, they reflect, they say, well, what is it about our company that may have caused them to leave? They look at that as data, as information, right? As facts, and they use that fact to then change their policy or do something with employee development or leadership development.

They don't get angry, upset, or emotional. Or they make it emotional, but they don't use their actions to display the emotion. So that's so good. I am so big. And to always respond, never react. And unfortunately, it definitely is something it took me years to learn that, but it makes you people view you and respect you in a powerful way from coming from a place of calm. And I always think to myself too,

I want to be the best version of myself. What does that look like being thoughtful, taking a moment before I have something to say to your weight method. I love the weight method. I love how you articulate that. Thank you. You talk in the book about how can you win when you don't have any support? What are some of the ways that people can help elevate themselves or get ahead when they feel like they don't have any champions on their side?

I can't imagine a situation where there is no support. So there are at least five different levels of support that one may have. First of all, and you may not call this support, but it's role modeling. Who do I look up to? You know, if you go in my office here, you'll see Harriet Tubman in my office. And she is a role model for me. And in that picture, you'll see her leaning forward with one hand. She's kind of going forth. She's got a rifle under her arm and a lantern, you know, leading the way. And she was the one that did the underground railroad to free slaves.

So she's going forward. And then if you look at her other hand, you'll see her pulling people behind her. There are slaves that are behind her and she's saying, okay, come on. She's pushing forward to new, dangerous territory because she could get shot, killed, captured, whatever. But she's also bringing people along with her. She's my role model. So then I think about her. She didn't have much power. Most people in the world have more power than she ever did.

And so I look at her as a role model, and I say, well, what would she do? So if nothing else, you say, I have a role model. So who in your company seems to attract the most amount of success? What do they wear? How do they look? What meetings do they attend? Can I get on their calendar for half an hour? Can I find a way to read their blogs or their posts or their LinkedIn profile? Even if you don't know anybody

in life, which is really hard to imagine, you least look at your own model. That's number one. Number two, there are people who you can turn into your mentor, right? So you don't have support from Tom Dick or Harry, but then there's Jane over there who you may not know, but you say, Jane, I really appreciated how you busted out your quota. You did this, you did that. Do you mind if I spend a couple of minutes just talking to you and picking your brain? I want to learn more about how you did it. People love to talk about themselves, Heather. So get on Jane's calendar. She will tell you all that you want to know.

And then be a good listener, be a good protege, be a good mentee, and listen to what she says, and then do it, and then go back to her and say, Jane, I tried what you do all the time and it worked for me. Child, you got Jane for life. She will always be in your corner. They say whoever is in your circle may not be in your corner, like in a boxing ring and Jane will be not only in your circle, she will also be in your corner because you listen to her. And then Jane may eventually become a sponsor, which is the next level up. And so there are accountability buddies. There are peers of yours. There's somebody in the organization

that may not be your boss. They may be your peer. There's somebody who respects you. There's somebody who likes you. And you may work with them and have them help you by being your accountability buddy. And so I do talk about that there is somebody in your life, there's even your family.

Your family knows somebody, right? Your family has a neighbor, you know, or your husband or your spouse or your partner has somebody that they work with that has something in common with you. There's organizations that you can join, right? Whether it be technology organizations, finance organizations, women's organizations, board organizations, there's organizations that you can join, right? Whether it be technology organizations, finance organizations, women's organization,

board organizations, there's always someone who wants to help and is available to help. I love the role model because to your point, you know, a lot of people will say, I can't find a mentor or no one's available to me or no one's offering to me, whatever it may be, but that really takes the excuses off the table. Like you said, whether it be a famous person

that you look to in history or someone you follow on social media, I mean, it is so attainable and available for everyone. So thank you so much for sharing that. And LinkedIn, I think, yeah, and I'm sorry, LinkedIn is a perfect place. You don't have to know every CFO in the world, but you just search for CFOs that work in the automobile automotive industry

That live in Georgia or whatever the ability to find these people who don't know you is Incredible so using LinkedIn even to find the role model that is close to doing what you do, I think it's really doable. So, you know, one of my quotes is hashtag find a way to win. It's not only one way, it's not only I got to find a mentor who works in my company, it has to be male, it has to be white, they have to be this and that. Find another way to win. Find a female mentor.

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I mean, look at you. So yeah, we've been given, as I say, women have been undervalued, underpaid, lack of access to capital. We paid 80% of what men get paid. And we still have to find an African-American woman. Black men, we are all in that similar category where we have to work twice as hard, be twice as smart, and maybe we get half as far. That's my premise. And so my strategies of looking at yourself as a product, the

strategy of having the mindset of a growth mindset so that you can drive personal transformation. When you think of yourself as a product and you're focusing on being a new version of yourself, that's how you work smarter. Because now you're not spending your time. You know, when I talked about bow, bows, and nose, B.O. are bodacious objectives. M.O. are those moderate objectives. M.O. are those moderate objectives. Yeah, they're pretty important.

They're pretty urgent. They align with my future. And then there's the N.O.s, the N.O.s, which are negligible objectives, or non-essential objectives. And so, first of all, don't focus on those N.O.s, focus on very few M.O.s, and focus on one or two BIOS, bodacious objectives that will align with, and I put a two by two matrix in the book,

where you can have an X-axis that gets into how does it align with my vision, and then the Y-axis that says, how good will it be? This is going to deliver a lot of value. And so I have the reader actually put their goals into those three categories. So one example of working smart is being able to work on the things that count. They say things that can count aren't always counted. And so you're doing all these different things,

but they don't really matter as much. Work on those two things that matter the most, delegate those things that might be important to somebody else, delegate those other MOs or those nodes to somebody else, so you can be focused on what's really important. So that's just one example. Don't give up. I've read Lean Startup by Eric Reese, and he talks about either you pivot or you persevere.

But nowhere in the book does he talk about giving up on your goal. So you persevere if the data is working, if the data is not working, you just don't keep going after stuff that's not working. You pivot and change your hypothesis and you don't waste your time going after things that doesn't seem to be working. You pivot and change your approach a little bit and then you go back in. So I think those are two ways that I would say you can work smarter and not harder. I love them.

Who did you write the book for? I wrote the book for women. It's funny, I had my publisher, McGraw Hill said, Ackney, who's the book for? I say everybody. Everybody wants to win, right? And they said, well, yes,

but you need to narrow it down a little bit. And so I said, okay, it's for women because we're the ones that are typically told we can't. We've been condition that we won't. You know, the system was not built by us and it wasn't built for us. So it's for women. And then I said, well, which women? It's for women that tend to be a little bit more in the middle of their career and just want to know how to get to that next level. Because sometimes there's a point where you kind of rise and then you kind of plateau. You may go have a child or something happens, but your trajectories not what it might

have been or what you wanted to be. So it's for women who are in mid-career. And I think it's also African-American women of color. I have a chapter in there that's called Leading While African American. I have a whole chapter devoted to what is it like as a woman of color. And so when you're stuck and stymied

that typically is who it is, it's usually women who are in the middle careers or that are of color. But men can read this book. Men can share the learnings, the stories in the book from all women, and I have one man in there, from all women that can learn from other women what they did in order to get out of a tough situation. So it's for women, middle career.

I really relate to that idea that, you know, even if early on your trajectory, what you were climbing very rapidly, and then you get to point to your point, have a child and suddenly you don't have as much time and or, you know, drive or focus or whatever and you kind of take a step back. And suddenly a couple of years have gone by this literally happened to me and I realized I've just been maintaining at work instead of I had these bodacious goals before by sort of just I dialed it down a little bit And I think that happens to a lot of people mid-career. And that's one of the things that I, when people say, do you have a regret thing? I think to myself, yeah, I just should have been pushing harder.

I didn't have to work more to your point. You could still work smarter, but I could have just been going for more, asking for more. That's right. And the five Fs are a real thing. And when you're single or don't have a child, that family F is not as important. And I look at what phase of life are you in. You're in learning all you can, you're earning all you can, or you're returning all you

can. And you have to look at what phase you're in and say, of those five Fs, which are most important to me for this phase that I'm in. And then you look at that. And so now you have context. You're not just going after a goal. You're not just having a baby and not thinking about the implications to your faith

or your fitness or what have you. But you look at all those 5Fs and now you call your place. It's up to you. It's not life is not happening by chance. It's happening to you. It's not life is not happening by chance. It's happening by choice. And so the five Fs in my opinion really helps you understand all dimensions that you are. And so that you can then decide what is it you want

to be able to do. And how do you want to govern having children and getting back into the marketplace? You know that fresh produce is the best produce. That's why at Crogr, we invest in local farmers to bring you seasonal picks that taste fresh from the farm good, like sweet corn, refreshing watermelon, and juicy peaches. So whether you're a delivery lover, a picker-upper, or you shop in store. Your local produce always tastes 100% fresh or you get a 100% refund guaranteed.

Kroger, fresh for everyone. How often do you suggest that somebody go back and revisit that and say, okay, we maybe we need to change which is the highest priority? Well, so in the plan of action, if you've got two bodacious objectives and then of course the objectives have key results, and those key results lead to actions.

You know, in order for me to get these key results, I have to act on some things. These key results, then if I do these key results right, they become objectives. And there's a section in there that I talk about 5F impact. It's 5F impact. So whenever you create your plan of action, you intentionally Put in your plan of action What you're gonna do for your 5F? So for example if you say I'm going to take a new job in California And your family has to move and you are now gonna be working

14 15 17 hours a day You have to know that your family's gonna take a hit. So then in your plan of action, you say there's a 5F impact. 5F impact is my family is going to see less of me. Then what are you gonna do, either you're not gonna take the job, or you're gonna take the job and you're gonna do something for your family every Friday and Saturday and Sunday, or you're gonna come home once, you know, one day a week early, there's something you're going to do

so that you can make sure that your family is okay. If you were going to be working 12, 13, 14 hours a day, and you don't work out anymore, and you used to, and you used to have, you know, local esterol and low blood pressure, and all of a sudden, you're going to be eating McDonald's at your desk every day, you've got to figure out, well, my fitness is still important to me, my physical fitness or my emotional fitness, my mental fitness, and you have to put in your plan, this is going to be something that I'm going to have to make

sure I focus on because I always enjoyed having a 118 over 80 blood pressure or whatever. And so it's built into the plan that you always look at your 5Fs on a regular basis to check and make sure that you're doing what you said you're gonna do. It's so powerful because it does change and when we just forget it and like you said just you know kind of let it take charge, we're not really creating our life, we're just kind of accepting what or allowing for what's ahead of us instead of directing it. So I really like this idea. Your book is literally like a business plan for life. It is. I call it the playbook. There's a playbook that I think kids have gotten from their

parents that when they see a kid who looks different than them, who's a girl and not a boy, there's a playbook that I think kids have must have received from their parents. And then my book is the reverse playbook. I'm going to reverse and tell you how to go back against that playbook that's been conditioning our minds in the wrong way. Because we don't want to just watch our life happen to us. Like you say, go and pass this. And we just kind of watch it happen to us. We want to call our own place. And if we can't call the play,

you know, there's sometimes you've got to quit your company. If the culture doesn't match, what you're trying to do, and if you don't like what the company is all about and what it stands for, there are times that you have to say, you know what, I'm not going to be here anymore. But you call that play on your own.

Well, you've called these plays. Like you did, like you did. You did that. Well, you too. I mean, you've called like you did like you did. You did that. Well, you too. I mean, you've called these plays. Your track record is incredible. The value that you deliver in this book is incredible. Where can everyone find your book and where can everyone find you? Well, my website is Daphne e Jones. So it's D-A-P-H-N-E-E Jones.com. DaphneE.Jones.com. And then you can put a slash there and then type book. So if you just want to go to the website, DaphneE.Jones.com, and then you'll see a, you know,

a thing for my book or you can just type the slash book. And, you know, the orders are available on Amazon. You know, you can preorder right now. The books will come out in November. But please pre-order right now. And you can find me and send me an email if you want to talk. If you want anything I can help you with. Let me know. DaphneEJounds.com. When, when they say you won't break through barriers

and keep leveling up your success, Daphne, thank you so much for writing this book and for all the good work you're doing and giving back. Thank you so much for writing this book and for all the good work you're doing and giving back. Thank you so much. It's a pleasure to see you and girl, we gonna get together in Miami. Oh, we are doing it. All right, people, hang in there, get that book.

It's live November 8th. You can get it right now pre-order and you will be so grateful that you'll be calling your own plays and going for both day-cious goals just like Daphne and I. Until next week, keep creating your confidence. I'm going to make a move again. I decided to change that idea.

And I thought I'd be around. I couldn't be more inside of the world. What you're getting here is starting to learn and growing. And inevitably, something will happen. And no one succeeds alone. You don't stop and look around once in a while. You can miss it. I'm on this journey with me. This episode is brought to you by the YAP Media Podcast Network. I'm Halataha, CEO of the award-winning Digital Media Empire YAP Media, and host of YAP

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