Creating Confidence with Heather Monahan - Step Into The POSSIBILITIES Of What You Can Create, With Heather! Episode 234

Episode Date: July 13, 2022

In This Episode You Will Learn About:  Getting comfortable with change  Noticing clear signs   Timing is everything  Resources: Overcome Your Villains is Available NOW! Order here: https://overcomeyourvillains.com  If you haven't yet, get my first book Confidence Creator Show Notes:  Change can be very healthy for you! Let go of the past that is holding you back and know that you deserve happiness. Try staying open to signs from the world telling you that you’re in the RIGHT PLACE, and commit to the future you want. If things aren’t happening for you right away, don’t worry! Timing is EVERYTHING, and what is meant for you WILL find you. Put out the energy you want to attract! The change you need will come to you! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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and grab one of your favorites that pack a punch. Explore all of the delicious flavors at Snapple.com. I'm on this journey with me. Each week when you join me, you're going to chase down our goals. If you're coming at diversity, it's at you up for a better tomorrow. I'm ready for my close-up. Hi and welcome back. I'm so glad you're back here with me today.

Okay, so major updates happening, major. I'm going to try to share with you today the process that I went through or I've gone through over the last few months to try to bring about change in my life, right? Which was not easy. However, I really believe that it worked. I mean, the proof is in the pudding, right? So let me cut to the chase. Okay. As you know, so bizarre, I started saying, this is gosh, months ago. This is probably back in January. I started saying, I don't know how, but I know some way that my son and I are going to move to a new home with so much space. By the way,

I live in a two bedroom condo on the ocean in Miami Beach, which is gorgeous, right? I live in the most beautiful place in the world on the water for 17 years. I love it. However, to live in a pandemic with a child in Zoom in one room and me in the other room on the computer in Zoom all day and we had no space, right? So ever since that happened, it just became clear to me, I really wanted to have space. That was something really important to me. And I didn't know how it was going to happen, but it's been something I've been putting out to the universe, right?

This is what I want. Don't know how it's going to come to be. And the reason why I say that is I bought this place in 2005, which was literally at the height of the market. South Beach was on fire. You couldn't even get in very similar to what it's like now. But because I bought it at the height of the market, I just always assumed I had to own this place forever because I wouldn't be able to make a profit.

I just ended up renting it out years later, but I felt I was stuck here, okay? So as long as I held onto that profit, I just ended up renting it out years later, but I felt I was stuck here. Okay. So as long as I held on to that belief, I remained here. Key changed the belief, right? So I started just putting out to the universe that I knew we were moving to a really spacious, beautiful, again, lots of space. He could have his own floor. I could have my own floor. I mean, big goals here, right? So anyhow, I kept putting that out to the universe, and on the daily, I had it written down, right? Like, I commit to it, I visualize it happening. And for a while, nothing happened. During this time, my son goes to school very far away. I mean, it's almost like it's a 45-minute-to-hour ride to school every day. You have to cross multiple

causeways, which means real potential for massive traffic. I was spending so much of my time in the last year in a car. It was truly causing me anxiety. I was like getting panicked when I was driving. I just was so sick of just wasting time. And for my poor son, too, who had to wake up at 5.45 in the morning to get to school, it's crazy.

No one should have to live you know, live like that unless you want to, unless you're a morning person, which 5.45 for a young boy in middle school is pretty early. Okay, so I was clear on what I didn't want, right, which was helpful. I knew I didn't want to live so far from his school anymore. I knew I didn't want to sit in traffic and waste time so much anymore

and spend so much of my day driving, right? So I was really crystal clear on what I didn't want to sit in traffic and waste time so much anymore and spend so much of my day driving, right? So I was really crystal clear on what I did not want. Now I need to start getting clear on what I did want So I wanted to live closer to his school closer to his friends so that I wasn't an uber driver every day just driving him around, right? I want something that's easier easy. Doesn't that sound so nice? Oh my gosh, I love easy. Right, so I decided I wanted something easy with a lot of space and beautiful and just easier. So I was putting that out to the universe, right, for a while. And definitely talking to people about it, not knowing what would happen and wouldn't you know randomly.

And if you've been with me listening to the show for a while, you already know this part of it. But all of a sudden one day, my neighbor walked up to me on my floor. She literally used to live next door to me, super nice woman, and said, hey, you should put your house up for sale. We just put ours up and we made a fortune on it. They haven't lived here that long. So I thought, oh, you know, they probably didn't buy it the worst time in the world like I did. And I said, oh, yeah, that sounds great. I wish I could move that would be amazing. She said, we'll talk to my Reelder because we just sold our place.

We're moving and, you know, there's other buyers that wanted our place. Maybe they'd buy yours. I said, okay, yeah, I will. I'll talk to them. And so I'd go inside. The next day I get home, right? I did nothing about it. I was thinking about it, but I didn't do anything.

And I got home and there's a note on my door from my neighbor and it's his Heather call my realtor. Here's his name, David. Here's this number. And I thought that was interesting, right? Because she's not a pushy person at all. She's so sweet. I don't even see her very often, right? They have a couple different homes and they're not always here. So I just thought, you know what, this means something. I'm super open to signs from the universe, from God. I'm always asking for them. If you're not, start asking for them because it's incredible what you'll find. But anyhow, so I thought, okay, this is a sign I need to call. So I call the Realtor immediately, calls me back. And he says, listen, I can sell your place in a week to two weeks tops a month.

This is back at the end of April. So I said, okay, oh my gosh, this is amazing news. I've been wanting to move so bad. My son goes to school so far away. It would be incredible. Get over here and tell me how much you think you can sell this for. I bought it the worst time. He and his partner come over and right away,

they tell me $500,000 more dollars than I paid for it. I about fell over. I was so living in the past that I wasn't opening my eyes up to the real potential of what was happening in the marketplace in front of me. I was just holding on this idea that I bought at the worst time and I could never sell. So thankfully, my neighbor, you know, tapped me on the shoulder. Thankfully, I've been putting out to the universe. It took God that I wanted to move. I wanted some opportunity to come along so that Dylan could get closer to school. Anyhow, okay, so I was super excited, right, over the moon. He reached out to all the potential buyers that had wanted my neighbor's condo. And so immediately we were showing my condo like, I don't even know, five times a day.

Now, let's pause for a minute. This is where no matter what change you want in your life, there's going to be pain with change, right? Like, change is you're going through some kind of an evolution, right? So the painful part around selling my condo, you have to get it literally pristine. You want everything so clean, you can't have dishes around or laundry around or everything has to be as clean and as empty as possible.

They wanted me to purge through so much stuff, old boxes or papers or whatever. So there was a lot of work that went on behind the scenes and as we were showing the condo so much, he didn't want me here when he's showing it. And I worked from home, right? So it was definitely a challenging window of time. You know, I was just leaving my house whenever he would text me. I've got someone, can I bring them by?

Sure. I would cancel a meeting or run to the car and take the meeting in the car, which is crazy. My point is it wasn't easy, right? We hadn't reached easy yet, but I knew I need to go through this little challenging window to get to this better other side that I want. So I want you to think about that for whatever changes that you want in your life.

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Shopify.com slash monahen. So this went on, I don't know, for maybe a week or two weeks and we immediately had two offers. Oh my gosh, this is so crazy. The first offer we had was almost full asking price. It was like $50,000 less than asking price and my realtor's an expert in this business and he said, let's go back and push them to meet halfway.

Okay, sure. She walked from the deal, right? Because she just didn't want to negotiate and that was it. Okay, so she was gone. By the way, that was the best offer we ever got on the condo. How crazy is that?

Because if you're aware of what's been going on, right, interest rates have skyrocketed and people are talking about recession and the housing market suddenly started slowing down in the mid to end of May. We didn't know this was coming right, had no idea. So that right after we lost that first buyer, a second buyer came, a little bit less than the first buyer, still a lot of money, and we said yes. Okay, we're going to take the deal. All cash should close really quickly. From day one, these people were so difficult to deal with. Knit picking everything, it was just a nightmare and you could sense something

not good was going on. Well, my realtor explains to me, because I haven't sold a house in 17 years, that, you know, they have to put a deposit down immediately, then they have to put a huge deposit down once you pass inspection. And once that happens, that's when he wanted me to go find somewhere else for us to live, but not until then, because you're not certain that you have the deal done. Even though you have the contract, right, you don't have the money. So it was the day of our inspection. I went over to this super cute restaurant right next to my house, which is adorable. And I was just drinking coffee, working over there. And he was there for hours.

And he told me it was going to be super quick. Red flag. Anyways, I came back. They said they wanted to meet the people that run the building. Then they found out there was a legal issue, which every condo building has legal issues. But they decided to say, tell Heather,

she either cuts another 100K off the price or the steel's dead were walking. So ultimately, they were trying a really dirty way of negotiating, which I think is extremely unethical. I don't do business like that. And frankly, I don't wanna do business with people like that. So I said, no, my realtor was with me, we agree.

We're like, we don't wanna work with people like this. If this is how they operate, it's gonna be worse, you know, going through the next few weeks and closing the steel with them, forget them. Okay, so up until this point, it had been super busy, so much traffic, so many people wanting to see my condo. We put it back on the market, but this is right when Memorial Day weekend had just passed. So in Miami, people leave in the summer, a lot of people go to the Hamptons or wherever else they live for the summer, and they just disappear. So that demand of all these people shopping condos was gone.

Timing is everything in business and in life. Okay. So that's stunk. And I remember getting into such a funk like, oh my gosh, we missed the window. I can't believe, you know, of course, I went right to negative, Nelly Land instead of saying positive, right? I got really negative. And we were not showing the condo at all for like a week. So I called my Reelder, I said, let's drop the price because we need to stimulate something.

And while we were fair market value, the market was changing. It was declining. And I saw a lot of people decreasing praise. And to me, I would rather have the peace and the ease of moving and having that time back and not having to drive so much and have less money than hold out for some ridiculous amount of money. So that was what we decided lower the price. Boom. Started getting some showings again. Great. No offers. So bizarre. So I'm going through all this, keeping my house pristine, leaving my house, running out to take calls from the car to go to a restaurant.

It was just very hectic for the last few months to say the least. And even once I was on a flight to go give a speech, my Reelder texted me, can we come to the condo? I said, well, Dylan's there. I can pray that he can get the house organized enough that it looks good. Let's do it. And he did. Anyways, Dylan pulled it off.

He got the house organized. He left the key at the front desk. He went to the gym for an hour let's do it. And he did. And anyways, Dylan pulled it off. He got the house organized. He left the key at the front desk. He went to the gym for an hour while they showed it. It worked out great. So that was super exciting. But anyway, so this is just the total chaos of the last few months and this uncertainty not knowing. So two weeks ago, I think it was two weeks ago,

I get a message from my Reelder and he's so upset. He wants to meet me in person. Why don't have any time? I said, let's just do it on Zoom if you need to see me. We get on Zoom, he's so sad. He says, how they're basically like we're in the thick of summer. There are not a lot of people shopping this market right now. I don't think that we're, you know,

there's a chance we can't sell this now because the markets change so drastically. I don't know what to do. I know you want to move because of Dylan in school and I know school starts in August. I'm freaking out right now. So he just, he got really negative, right? So I had to give him a firm talking to you about, listen, we've got to find ways, we've got to strategize, we've got to look for creative solutions and we have to stay committed to,

this is going to happen. We've got to be certain that we're putting out that right energy that we're attracting that right buyer and we know it's going to happen. So he agreed and went back to market and wouldn't need out in the next week. We had two offers, neither nearly as good as the other ones that we had previously, but at this point, I was just so committed to moving and making it happen.

So we decided the offer that we wanted to take with the people. previously, but at this point, I was just so committed to moving and making it happen. So, we decided the offer that we wanted to take, you know, with the people. It was a company. It just seemed like a better deal than working with these individuals and anyhow, then it was delayed. And then it was delayed. And I'll tell you, in my mind, I'm going back and forth between, oh my gosh, I know this is going to happen. I know this is going to work right this knowing in this certainty that I'm putting the right energy and vibe out there. And then of course, on certain, not my gosh, I know this is gonna happen. I know this is gonna work right. This knowing in this certainty that I'm putting the right energy and vibe out there. And then of course, on certain, not so great days becoming negative, Nelly, and then second guessing and panicking and freaking out, right?

Which does not help. It definitely doesn't help. So I stayed committed to this knowing that the right fire was coming, that the deal was gonna get done. And then I asked God for a sign. I said, please give me a sign so that I know that this is

the deal. And I know this one's going to go through. And I'm just going to tell you that I got it. And it was unbelievable. And it got my attention. And once that happened, I just knew it's done. This is a done deal. This is beyond me. This is meant to be. And I'm so grateful for it. So then to show another sign on Saturday of this weekend, this past weekend, the paperwork

came over. People work doesn't come over on Saturdays, by the way, right? It was fully executed, and this offer came over on July 4th. Everything is so, that doesn't happen. Holidays, people aren't buying properties. And so all these amazing signs have been coming to me telling me that this is the right buyer, this is the right time, and it's gonna go smoothly and easily. So to make a long story longer, you know, it's just been this kind of crazy tumultuous ride. Definitely to not end out exactly the way I had predicted it, the way that it started, right? Things have changed so drastically because you can't project what a marketplace is gonna do.

You don't know what challenges may arise. Timing is everything, but the one thing you can control is your energy, your vibe and what you're putting out there. And I have total clarity that that really impacts things in such a big way. You know, we all know that there's frequencies out there, like to tune into a radio station,

you tune into a certain frequency. Here's the thing, you're always putting a frequency out there to the world, and you need to start being intentional and aware of it, to see what you're attracting, what you're bringing towards you, and be mindful. Your word choices, your word is your wand, and you're speaking things into existence by

what you choose to say or what you choose not to say. And I really, I've had a challenging few months with this. I mean, so many of my friends were away on vacation and we were invited so many places. And I had to keep declining because my goal was, I need to be omnipresent here to sell this property and move as quickly as I need to be omnipresent here to sell this property and move as quickly as I need to so that this happens.

I want to make it as easy as possible for my realtor, as easy as possible for potential buyers. That means sacrificing some vacations and sacrificing, some crazy work schedules and cleaning and whatever. But in the end, it will be worth it. Whatever the change and challenges that you're looking at just realize you've got to go through that challenge, you've got to make some of those sacrifices

to get to that end goal. The biggest thing you need to do is really hold onto that vision of what you want and stay committed to it and be really aware of that energy that you're putting out there during these moments, especially during the challenging times.

And I'll tell you, you know, for me working out is such a saving grace. I know I can get myself in a really good headspace if I can get myself to work out. So that's been, you know, a daily commitment for me during this time is working out every single day so that I can keep my vibe up. I can keep my energy up. I can remind myself what it is that I'm working towards, I can keep that vision real and having it written down and revisiting it daily and picturing it in my mind. Well now here we are, we've got a fully executed contract. Yeah, so excited. I have

this knowing, I know this is the deal, I know it's going through. I'm crystal clear on it and now I need to see Where is it that I'm meant to live where are Dylan and I supposed to live? So it's a super exciting adventure of Change and opportunity and as I look back, you know, I changed the perfume that I was wearing a few months ago I changed the lotions that I started all these little changes in my life, which might not sound much, right? Like not a huge deal. But I believe it's like everything you do is putting out these little messages to the

universe, to God, to your higher power. And when you start doing that, you start building this momentum, you start basically throwing up a flag saying, okay, I'm ready for this next great thing. And it's interesting because I saw a friend of mine the other day, she was explaining to me that she's been dating this guy and he's not really, you know, everything she wants, but she's just gonna date him

because it's fun to be with somebody. And I said to her, why would you do that? That's putting out the message to the universe that this is what you want. This is what you're happy with. You're never going to find, in my opinion, what it is you really want if you're not willing to let go and walk away of what you don't want. Right?

Like you've got to say goodbye to that if you want to open that door for what you truly want. So I see that in so many different aspects of my life, even with my old job, right? I was miserable working side by side with that lady that couldn't stand me for years, but I wasn't willing to quit. So I stayed in an awful situation and perpetuated it. I could have quit. I could have made that leap and made that big transition step through that challenging

time and opened up the door of opportunity, which eventually happened when I got fired, but I didn't. I stayed stuck in it. So even though I was wanting to find another job, wanting to find door of opportunity, which eventually happened when I got fired, but I didn't, I stayed stuck in it. So even though I was wanting to find another job, wanting to find a new opportunity, those doors weren't gonna open until I closed the one that I was hanging on to. Say you have a business idea,

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You like working with people you can rely on by USA, a who has helped guide the military community for the past 100 years. USA, a get a quote today. So think about that in your life. Like, what are you hanging on to or allowing for? I see so many people settling for things, settling for bad jobs, settling for bad relationships, settling for not being healthy, just because they don't, they're afraid to let go of what is to see what can be.

The thing is, and I will go back to this so often, is that sometimes the universe gives us something so much better that we didn't even know was out there for us, right? I didn't know there was going to be a big speaking career for me. I didn't know there was going to be this podcast and that you were going to be listening and that we were going to be hanging together, right? I didn't know any of these things were going to happen until I was willing to let go of what was and step into the possibility of what could be. Super scary, I get it, and listen, I'm trying to tell you, I still toggle back and forth,

but I'm getting better. It's like retraining yourself. One of the things that was helpful for me, it might be helpful for you, is learning, learning new things, listening to different people, listening to people who have been where you wanna go, will start allowing your mind to think differently and start seeing possibilities. So I made a decision a few months ago, no longer to listen to radio or music or whatever in the car, but instead to listen to audiobooks and podcasts

that would train me to think differently, that would teach me new ways of thinking and would help me to focus on what I want to create. And I think it's had a big impact, right? Like, I'm constantly running these loops in my mind of what the potential of my future can be. And I'm focusing on these changes, and I'm making small changes all around my life,

to show the universe that God that I'm ready for these bigger ones, and I'm seeing it come to fruition now and it's so exciting. And I want that for you, right? I know it's super easy to get caught up in the headlines and all the negativity. I'm choosing not to participate.

I'm over it, you know, I chose to participate during COVID and it took me to downtown negative Nellie, like not a good train, not interested in going back. So instead this time, I'm going to focus on my mindset, my thoughts, and the possibility within me. And there is always possibility. I think back to the O809 recession and I just, I focused on all the negativity and how scared I was. What I've learned now is that you have a choice to choose fear or you can choose joy. You can choose love.

Today, I'm choosing joy and love. I'm not going to hang on to fear. It doesn't end well. You end up harming yourself. Whether you realize it or not at the time, I want you to know that is a choice. And I get it, you're saying, well, maybe for you, it's a choice. But for me, I'm afraid I'm not going to be able to pay my bills or do this or that. I get it. I felt the same way. But once I changed my thinking, those opportunities started to present themselves and they weren't

presenting themselves when I was hanging onto the fear, when I was hanging onto what wasn't working. So choose to let go of what's been weighing you down, choose to let go of what you've been settling for, so you have that opportunity to open that door to that possible future that is out there for you. I am living it right now. I promise you I am still living it and I still want you to be as well. So thank you for being here with me this week. I can't wait to keep you updated on what's going on and where we're going to move and what's,

I mean, the whole thing is just, it's so exciting. It's like one big adventure and I'm grateful to be on it with you. Until next week, keep creating your confidence. If you could leave a review of the show, share the show with one person that you think it could help an impact, no one succeeds alone, and that includes me. Until next week, keep creating your confidence, you know I will be. This episode is brought to you by the YAP Media Podcast Network. I'm Halah Tahha, CEO of the award-winning digital media empire YAP Media, and host of

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