Creating Confidence with Heather Monahan - Turn Your Passion Into ACTION With Ellen Bennett, Sarah Pendrick, Tiffani Bova, Ashley Stahl, Brit Morin & Christmas Abbott Episode 326

Episode Date: May 31, 2023

In This Episode You Will Learn About:  How to start betting on yourself   What it takes to go after your DREAMS   The steps to overcome what is holding you back  Resources: Overcome Your Villains is Available NOW! Order here: https://overcomeyourvillains.com  If you haven't yet, get my first book Confidence Creator Show Notes:  It’s time to take a leap of faith! Consider this a sign to stop doubting yourself and start BETTING on yourself. It’s your turn to take action and go after the life you want! I’ve put together some inspiration from some of my favorite guests who have taken the leap and lived to tell about it. I hope this inspires you to take action and finally GO FOR IT!  -00:52 Ellen Bennett-Episode 111, THIS Is Your Sign To START Now and Figure Out The Details LATER -7:30 Sarah Pendrick-Episode 135, The #1 Way To STOP Fearing and START Living In Your Power -13:28 Tiffani Bova-Episode 109, How You Can Find Your Superpower, Hone Your Craft and Do The WORK -21:12 Ashley Stahl-Episode 88, Making A You Turn: Finding A Career that Honors You -28:40 Brit Morin-Episode 95, Founder of Brit + Co. Asks You To Be Messy, Get Creative & Take The Leap -38:01 Christmas Abbott-Episode 97, It's Never Too Late To Start!  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This episode is brought to you by Snapple. Want to taste the flavoriest flavors to ever flavor? Mmm! Snapple is ridiculously flavorful, and you can uncap a snapple real fat with every bottle, like, cows produce more milk when they listen to music. Come on! Leave the ridiculousness to Snapple,

and grab one of your favorites that pack a punch. Explore all of the delicious flavors at Snapple.com. I'm on this journey with me. Each week when you join me, you are going to chase down our goals. If you're coming at diversity, it's at you up for a better tomorrow. After you've seen me, I'm ready for my close-up. Welcome back. I'm so glad you're back here with us this week. I know how hard it can be at times to trust your deepest desire and truly believe you can

pull it all off, but consider this your sign to bet on yourself. It's time to take the leap, my friend. It's your turn to start taking action to bring your passion to life. I put together some inspiration from some of my fav guests who've taken the leap and lived to tell about it. I hope you feel super excited to take a step towards your own dream after listening to this. Remember, take action and go for it.

I'm on this journey with me, with me, with me, with me. So it's about starting to show up in some area, whatever it is that you wanna do. If you want to become an architect, go intern at an architecture firm. If you want to be an artist, carve out time on your calendar where you're dedicating space to that.

You just have to put time aside and show up in some way that gets you closer to that goal, whatever it is, big or small, like baby steps to move it forward. And what you're really doing secretly is you're building your own confidence. So that when that opportunity does come along, you can actually say, yes, I know how to do that. Or yes, I'm going to show up in this way. And I had many, many funny jobs before I started headland, but I was the lottery announcer in Mexico City on television for millions of viewers every day.

And that was one of my many weird jobs to get myself through culinary school. But because I said yes to that, because I would show up, I just felt this, yes, I can do it, when other funny, interesting, unique situations came my way. So don't be afraid to show up and try things and do funny jobs and not have a perfect straight path. Like the straight path yes we see it on TV we see it in movies but it's just not the honest to goodness path that everybody takes. There's a lot more people that have a windy road and the

windy road is a good road. So don't feel bad or think that it's a bad road to be on. Oh my gosh, I love that you shared that. I led that whole linear path back in corporate America. And I thought that was the way it was supposed to be that it was clear and well lit and straight until I got fired unexpectedly and was thrust into the windy path. And I'll tell you, I want it so scary when you think it's supposed to be one way and you get thrown into the other way. 100 million percent.

And I'm trying to normalize that the windy path is actually where you learn the most. It's where you make the biggest impact. It's where you become creative and you be resourceful and you think outside the box. Because if you're on a straight path, that path has already been taken. You're just kind of following everyone else.

Like do you want to be like everyone else? Or do you want to show up in the world and like make a difference? That's what it's about. It's about making that magic happen. And so I really, really, really am excited for people to pick this up and be like, damn, I can do this too.

And it's totally okay. And it's gonna be messy. And I'm here for it. Oh, it's so good and so true. So tell me about the confidence belt and doing the things that scare you that you teach in the book. Yes, there's a whole section on it

where I talk about confidence is like a savings account. And every time you show up to do something that is a little bit out of your comfort zone, you're investing in that account. And you're accumulating this feeling and it builds up over time. And you sort of like stretch your mental muscles to be willing to do this one thing. It's a little scary. And then you do it anyway, right? A long time ago, I decided I wanted to be a runner. And then I signed up for the New York marathon and I got in. And I was like, holy shit.

I just got into the New York marathon. I guess I have to train now. And then I started training and I did the marathon and it was incredible and terribly hard experience, but I showed up and I did it. And so it sometimes takes a big decision or a big moment or a big, this is scary, but I'm doing it anyway. And then you start working towards it

and turns out you're stronger than you think you are. So you get to the other side and then you do bigger and crazier and better things. So you just gotta like put yourself in situations where you're not just in the safety of your own little home and world and like branch out and make that talk to somebody that you wouldn't have talked to, call somebody that you're afraid to talk to, email somebody that you want to work for, like do those things that make you nervous and then keep doing it again. And if you fail, keep going

anyway. So one of the things that I noticed that you do, just even in that description that you just gave us is you hold yourself accountable at a really high level, which for me, that's one of the ways that I'm able to push myself into fear. So you told the chef that you could take the order on the aprons when you didn't have the apron company. You signed up for the New York marathon

when you hadn't have the apron company. You signed up for the New York marathon when you had a train for it yet. You hold yourself accountable before there's truth that you can actually do it. Yeah. And that's been my way of just committing. It's like a commitment. You make a mental decision and then you make a physical decision in some capacity. Something that's going to thrust you there and then you got to, then you gotta do it. You gotta show up. What are you gonna not do it? Like that's not cool.

You gotta show up and do it. So it's a beautiful thing, but that is truly how I've created all these like notches on my confidence belt. When I turned 18, I moved to Mexico City by myself. I had no family. I didn't know anybody. I went for two months. I stayed for four years,

and it was the wildest experience I had ever had, but I learned so much about being resourceful, sustainable on my own two feet, and how to just get out in the world and make something out of nothing. And this was yet another knock-ch on the confidence belt, being the lottery announcer on television for Mexico, knock-ch on the confidence belt. So the lottery announcer on television for Mexico, knockdown the confidence belt.

So it's just do those things that scare you and it will lead you to bigger things that you are actually wanting to do. Something you're passionate about, that dream, that goal, whatever that is. Oh, it's so good. I agree so much that you've got to start small and building that strength to go on

to those next bigger things. It doesn't come from zero to 100. It definitely goes zero to 10 first. Yeah, exactly. And I break all those little moments down because people just think of the giant moment, the giant success. They're like, and then they were on Forbes magazine.

You're like, do you know all of the failed businesses that they had, the amount of pain in English, the loans that they had to take out, the things that they had to the amount of pain in English, the loans that they had to take out, the things that they had to do that led to that moment. And so this is the beginning of the journey. This I'm 33 years old. I started Heavily a minute when I was 24 and a half. So it's the first chapters of business and how to get it there so that you can then one day be on the cover of Forbes or be a successful person. But all of this is imperative to get it there so that you can then one day be on the cover of Forbes or be a successful person, but all of this is imperative to get to that. You need to take these first steps

to make that leap. It's not something like easy path where it's just like lands. I'm on this journey with me, with me, with me, with me. I came to LA and I'm like, what am I going to do? I was just thinking like, who do I know? What can I do here? Did the like hostess thing and then hostess at night? And then I went and worked in the fashion industry with marketing because I had learned marketing. I knew how to talk to people. I just started gathering all these different skills. And then one day actually after my first Tony Robbins event, I realized that this was fast for like two years later and I was successful in what I was doing in PR and marketing. I realized that I was building everyone else's brand,

but still not doing something of my own. That's when I came across that business plan from when I was like 13 or 14 and couldn't getting back from UPW. Once again, maybe this is my pattern. I kind of burned the boats. All my client contracts were coming to an end. I had this agency that was amazing and I'm again, maybe this is my pattern, I kind of burned the boats. Like all my client contracts were coming to an end. I had this agency that was amazing and I'm like, you know, I don't have to worry about paying my rent. I'm doing amazing. Do I want to start all over again?

And that's when I was like, yeah, I do because why did I come here? Why did I stop my PhD? Why did I move all the way to LA? I came here to have a platform and something that not only healed me, but also healed other people around me. Wow, that is so powerful. And I love what you said about you are building everyone else's brand. And I so feel that. And for anyone listening right now, investing in yourself.

And even if you're working for another company or you're doing something different, still build your own brand, be in charge of that. What was that like for you starting to invest in yourself and build your brand? I think that that is what's made me such a successful and fulfilled business woman is by like listening to my soul, listening to my intuition and taking those risks. And that's what's built my resilience

and the things that I've been able to create. And also, even though at the time I burned the boats again, I had already had success and I was doing those things on the side. So when I share the stories, I'm not saying everyone go like burn the boats. But what I'm saying is when we really tap into what our soul knows and what we really want to be doing, I talk about this in the book, like think about what you wanted to be when you were younger, because there's a message in there for that. That's when you start really getting that success,

and even more so, more important than success is that fulfillment. Oh, it's so, so true. I love that idea of thinking about what was it that you wanted to do? What were you drawn to do before people started telling you you can't do that? Exactly.

So, what was the girl top journey like? It sounds like success was just coming easy, was it simple to create this? You know what's crazy? The very first event that I put on was simple. I will say, I did not have a social media following. I maybe have like 500 or a thousand people on my personal Instagram at the time.

But what I did is I went old school. I went door to door. I had the event in Manhattan Beach where I live, which is right next to LAX outside of LA. I got businesses involved. I brought value to each person that was going to support the event. And though it was hard work, it came together so easily and it sold out, which just doesn't happen. It has not been that easy since I will say that. It is not at all. And I think the reason it was that easy is because I was following what my soul knew and I was just trusting. And it just all came together. And then of course, as you continue to build and shift, you have more challenges that come with that. But I would rather be going

through those challenges than anything else that I was doing. But I would think to me, and again, I'm on the outside looking at you, have hundreds of thousands of people in your community, this massive community, I would think it wouldn't become easier as you went on. You know what? I ask myself that sometimes too. So I think it's different. It's different of what you're doing. Like, when I was doing courses in the membership because I built my community and was just so authentic and really had them not only like heal with me, but also just have them as friends as well.

So courses and things like that were easy. What started to get more difficult was filling events because there's so many events out there. And so that's where I kind of started to sit back and I had myself.com in, which I write about in the book and how to rise above that, where I was like, oh, there's so many events. Who might have another event?

Is this event gonna sell out? And I went down that path for a while. And once I cleared that, it became easier again. I just had my biggest event that I had right when the start of 2020 Girl Talk Festival. And when I was able to clear that doubt and stop worrying and comparing the festival sold out. And it was my most favorite event that we've done so far.

What did you do to clear that doubt? So the thing that I do when doubt comes up and this is why I wrote about it in the book, because it doesn't matter who you are, doubt comes up. Things happen, you have different seasons in your life. Instead of trying to talk it away or pretend that it wasn't there, just keep going down this road, I actually gave myself the space to dive deeper into where that doubt was coming from. And once you have that

awareness and you're also just giving yourself, it's like with a relationship, if you ignore your partner, if you ignore your friend, you're not going to get anywhere. So I was ignoring myself and just trying to push through and be like, okay, well, this is what you do to sell out an event. And the minute I actually gave myself that time, there's something that energetically cleared. Also my energy and my care doubled. So I was able to come at things from a different perspective and just really clear that space

for people to organically start finding the event. That's so interesting to me because I am definitely the person that always thinks power through, power through the idea of giving yourself the space to sit and it actually sounds a little scary to me. Yeah, I know, it is. It is so scary to most people and it's still scary to me

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I'm on this journey with me. I accidentally stumbled into selling and realized I was good at it. And then I could make some money on it. Well, this is awesome. Like, great, I can make money doing what I enjoy doing. I'm a people person. You know, I was an athlete my whole life.

And so I love the competitiveness of selling, like you know, winning that deal feels just as exciting today as it did 30 years ago. And then I realized, you know, that when I left the sort of sales leadership profession, I was burnt. I was burnt out, I needed a break, I had just been grinding for 15 years and I had to get off that merry-go-round and I decided that I wanted to go and become an analyst and

consultant on sales transformation, so to use what I had learned. And I didn't know how to do that, actually. Like it's a very different muscle. So the first couple of years that felt like I wasn't very good at it. But what happened was people started to share with me what they thought my superpower was. And it could be storytelling. It could be taking lots of data from multiple sources

and being able to package that into a presentation or looking for signals and trends in the market. I didn't realize they were my superpowers until people started to tell me, you're really good at this. And once I realized that, then I said, okay, how do I do more of that? And so I think it was a process of elimination. Like, what do I want to do?

What am I really good at? And what are my clients actually value for me? And then how do I create a situation where I do more of that, where I do more of what people think I'm good at and that I enjoy and I love doing? And that's kind of how that happened. That was kind of the that happened. That was

kind of the work. It's not just what you want to do, but also what people value in what you bring to the table, you know, why they hired you or why they invited you to a meeting. Like, ask the question, hey, you invited me to this meeting, why do you invite me to this meeting? And they may say, you know, you always bring a unique perspective. Oh, okay, thank you. Right? Then you go, okay, people think I bring a unique perspective. And then ask someone, why'd you invite me to this? Or, you know, give me some feedback in this meeting. And they might say, you know, you're really good at this, and this, okay, I'm really good

at this, and this. Or you could improve here. You have to ask so that you can kind of find where you want to double down. And that's why that vision board was really a creation of all the things people thought I did fairly well. So I like that you called it the work, right? Because as I'm three years into being an entrepreneur and I identify with what you just said,

still in the work of everything is evolving and changing. And it's scary and hard and so different than being back in corporate America, where it felt so much more linear, you knew with that next move, the path was already mapped out for you versus I feel like now I'm living in the work. How did you keep yourself further on and say, you know what, this is the work and I get it and I'm sticking with it versus getting frustrated and saying, gosh, I keep, I'm not with failure. I'm met with challenges. I met with challenges.

Maybe I'm not supposed to be doing this. Well, there's so much in that. I'd say more than anything, for those of you listening that have children or get them into sports, doesn't matter if they're not very good at it. There's so many lessons I learned in sports. Winning with humility, losing with your head held high,

being coachable, being a teammate, sharing, getting feedback, giving feedback. There's so many lessons in sports. So, I think when you talk about the work, it's like you have to become a student of your profession, whatever that is. It's like if you want to get in shape, you have to go to the gym. You're going to be sore for the first 30 days, but don't stop going because if you stop going because you're sore and you go back again, you're just going to get sore again. But if you just keep working on it, you know, eventually you won't be sore anymore. So now you either need to increase the weights or mix up the workout. So you get sore again, right? It's about getting a little uncomfortable every single day because

sitting in comfort means you're not sort of challenging yourself to do other things. But I will also say, through that process, you're going to find your non-strengths, which is another word for weakness. You're going to find your non-strengths. Now, do you want to double down and try to make yourself really good at those non-strengths? Or do you want to say, those are my non-strengths?

I'm going to surround my people who that is their strength. And I'm going to go focus on what is my strength, right? I mean, that's a perfect setup, especially as an entrepreneur. Like, I hear all the time. I'm trying to grow my business, and then, I'm just about to double my revenue. Are you the right leader to get you to the next place?

Is your strength being able to do that? Or is it time for you to bring in another CEO or to bring in a partner or to bring in a chief financial officer or whatever it might be right to fill in those non-strengths? And so I think that throughout the journey, that's what you have to learn is fall in love with failure, get comfortable with being uncomfortable,

find out what your non-strengths are surround yourself with people who could help fill in those gaps and then find a way to double down on what you're really good at. Such good advice could not agree more. However, it does sound a little bit easier than it actually is, putting it into practice just like going to the gym, as you mentioned. So obviously growth is one of your superpowers, one of the things that you're able to identify.

Right now, looking at so many business owners and employees of companies with this new, crazy world that we're in, as you step back and take a look at industries and business today, what are some of the suggestions you have in ways that people can start to move forward to regain their footing and start moving to a growth plan? For me, I feel like having been a sort of advisor

and consultant for a decade on growth and sales at a company called Gartner, which is the world's largest analyst and consulting firm for tech companies is the lack of investment that was made around technology, pre-pandemic, really caught a lot of businesses flat-footed. Because if you have to close your doors overnight and you don't have any commerce presence, you're Because if you have to close your doors overnight and you don't have any commerce presence,

you're in trouble. If you close your doors overnight and your employees don't have the ability to use cloud-based products to work from anywhere, you're in trouble. If you don't have the ability to communicate with your customers, I mean, you even have to know who they are, you're in trouble.

So I think what has happened was it kind of showcased and highlighted the lack of investments that had been made. But what has happened was it kind of showcased and highlighted the lack of investments that had been made. But what has been really inspiring is over the last 12, 13, 14 months is how quickly small businesses entrepreneurs have pivoted to making those technology investments and doing the things they need to do to make sure their employees are safe and capable of doing their job. But getting back to growth requires a very different mindset

today because the buying and selling engine is now all digital. And it doesn't matter if you're selling a hard good or you're selling a service. Ultimately, you have to figure out what do our customers want tomorrow from us or six months from us. And it's not going to look the way it looked 12 months ago. So if you just sort of step in and go, we're just going to keep doing what we were always doing. Now the world's opening back up, you're going to be very disappointed because the customers are different, you know, the habits are different and more specifically, customers expectations have changed. We now are these super consumers, you know, that live in our and shop and educate and do healthcare in our homes. And now you want us to go back to work to an office,

but ultimately the behaviors we've now learned over the last 12 months are ingrained. And so if you try to just force the way it always used to be, you're not going to get those same results. So there's so many moving parts, but I would say especially in the entrepreneur and small business, they have been so resilient and so dedicated to making sure that they open back up and continue to serve their customers, if at all possible, somewhere unable to make it,

but then it's what is the lesson learned and how do you set your stuff up for success going forward? I'm on this journey with me, with me, with me, with me, I think there's other forces at play like in addition to what you're sharing, it's like here's the thing about clarity. If you don't have it, it's expensive because it turns your career into sometimes a graveyard of trial and error. And trial and error is not a bad thing. The

best careers are built on trial and error. I think one of the biggest mistakes people make is that they hold their career too seriously, too heavily, and they're not nimble enough to change. Like, it reminds me of having gone into the office that Pixar, there's a big sign on the wall that said fail faster. And it's so true. The people who are nimble in their career, they're willing to make decisions,

try something on, show up, see what feedback the universe gives them, get out of limbo, make a commitment, and then course correct along the way. The people who are willing to stay in motion and not see the potential for failure as like this reason to stop or slow down so much. And it's not just say to go so fast, but it is to say that some people are so afraid of failure, they stay paralyzed. Do you know? And I think that perfection paralysis is just a mask for fear of failure. Absolutely. And so yeah, it's like, what can we do to stay in motion? So in my case, I had an online course.

I scaled it. It created an email list in just two months of a half million millennial women. We did millions of dollars of revenue in that two month period. After a year of me failing, by the way, I was negative 100K in when this thing turned. So I went from completely broke

to into credible wealth in two months. And then there's so many different things that happened in the sales of my job hunting course. I had a Facebook ad specialist who wanted to push the envelope. I trusted him. I ended up going a half million dollars into debt after that. Spending three and a half years continuing to build my business

and paying that off. And, you know, if there's anything I've learned, it's that everything you do is serving you in some way. And I don't like it when people say that, because I'm like, really, my $5 million of debt that's been such a buzzkill. But you know what, the amount of speaking engagements I've booked almost amounts to the amount of debt I took on,

because they want me to talk about the failure. So it's just really trusting your life. And I think when you can move through that lens of deep trust and it doesn't mean you resign. Trust does not mean surrender does not mean resignation, you know, but really trusting it. And I think taking that tactical action. So for example, I'm not just following your passion. I'm not a big believer in that,

but really taking a look at what are my skills? What are my gifts? And a good question for people to ask the people around them is when have you seen me at my best? When have you seen me at my best? Because you'll be surprised what your parents will say about that, what a couple of close friends, what a couple of colleagues.

It always helps to text people that or email them that, so you can read their responses. And maybe you can say, hey, you know, this crazy career coach, Ashley Stoll in this podcast wanted me to ask you this. Whatever it is that makes you ask them, but you will be surprised what people will respond to you saying.

And from there, you can ask yourself, what skill set are you using when you're at your best? What are you doing that would, I don't know, like relay to a skill set that you're using in your life because according to research, the people around us tend to know us better than we know ourselves. That's the case with divorce. People know if their friends are going to get divorced before their friends know. And it's a lot of the times the case with our career.

We think we're good at one thing, but other people might notice something else. And I think a lot of that has to do with the fact that what you're great at sometimes is too obvious for you to even notice. Well, Ann, that's like you said, you're trapped in the bottle. So you don't really see it the same way that everyone else outside says,

wow, she's so much better at this than everyone else. You think, oh, everyone's probably pretty good at this. Or this is a, you know, something that comes natural to people. Oftentimes we de-value typically whatever it is that we're good at and just assume other people are good at it. To that point that you had reaching out and asking for emails from 10 different people in your life, I use that as a confidence building exercise

because not only is it showing what skills you're great at, but also it gives you that boost of seeing yourself through the lens of someone else. And you're absolutely right, keeping that in a file or an album so you can go back and reference it. You know, things change over time, things evolve over time. It is important to look at those things and keep those that feedback handy. Yeah, absolutely. And I mean, if I'm being really candid, it's like, we've got to trust ourselves and we've got to trust our intuition ultimately. But I think, you know, it's like whenever my business feels like it's plateauing, the thing I think about the most is how do I go have more conversations? Because that's where I get more information, more inspiration, and I get back more to myself.

So even if you lead with your own intuition, I think collecting other information, just making sure you're coming from a good place when you do that. Some people are shopping for opinions because they don't want their own. They're scared of trusting themselves. Other people are collecting information

to filter it through their own intuition. So I think knowing where you sit as your taking feedback is huge in your career. Oh my gosh, it's so huge. And who you're taking the feedback from is so important because so many people want to protect us and keep us safe and don't want us taking chances and they think they're being helpful offering feedback

that's really paralyzing us or limiting us. Yeah, absolutely. You should know what that means already. That's the best kind of notification. That's the sound of another sale on Shopify and the moment another business dream becomes a reality. Shopify is a commerce platform revolutionizing millions of businesses worldwide. Whether you're selling books or courses, Shopify simplifies selling online and in person so you can focus on successfully growing your business. Shopify covers every sales channel from in-person POS system to all-in-one e-commerce platforms,

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your podcast. So what are some of the other ways that you get people to go from, okay, I might not be in the job I love, but you know, I see that I have the skillset. Now where do I go from here? Well, let me walk through. If you're down for it, the 10th skill sets I have in my book, because I think in the U-turn book, there's an 11-step road map to get clarity. My favorite thing is your core skillset. Obviously, I go into it so much more in depth, but I think this is a starter for the notetakers on the show would help them. So out of the 10, I want to just remind people, it's an energy that you go into. It's not just a skill you use. These skill sets are energies. So the first one is innovation. And the innovator can be the intrapreneur, it can be

the entrepreneur. It's the creative person who is brainstorming, who is managing their own book of business. They are somebody that's whose creativity or self-starter initiative is moving a business or a company forward. And it's very much so in energy, there are problem solver, there are visionary. The second course go set is building. So this is anything from that tactical side of things like a mechanic or a construction worker, or it can be a little bit more concrete like a web developer who is building a website

in a more concrete like a web developer who is building a website in a more concrete way. And then number three, I think this might be yours too, whether it is words. So my course goal set is words. And that means, you know, the speakers, the writers, the sales people, and it's important to know as you're going through these course skill sets, whether you're an introvert or an extrovert. And the reason I would say that is because there's different ways of expressing a course

skill set. Like if I'm an extrovert, I'm probably going to be a speaker. If I'm an introvert and I'm words is my course skill set, it would be so damaging and exhausting for me to be speaking on stage all the time. And I do believe in all of the research around ambivots, but I do think most people default to one or the other when it comes to how they get their energy. Do you absolutely need time alone to get your energy, or do you really feel like people are a battery charger for you? I'm on this journey with me, with me, with me, with me.

So often, they get so afraid to put out their idea into the world, but literally if you build a landing page that just like has a paragraph about the thing you're building, maybe a picture of it and a sign up now button. Like you can just see in the data how many people are interested and if it catches fire. And maybe you should build 10 versions of that to see test 10 different ideas. You know, a lot of people are stuck in between ideas,

what should they choose. So just put it out there, test it. You know, it's like 10 Ferris to your point about books, literally bought words on his own dime to test the four hour work week. That was the most clicked on ad for his book. Many tests was like 100 variations of that title. So it's so true.

And as much as my like creative artistic heart hates Making data driven decisions sometimes. I just want to go with my gut. The data doesn't really lie and and the best is when you compare those two things together Oh, it's so true. That's when it's pure magic Okay, so how did you get yourself to walk away from such an amazing job with so much responsibility with amazing people? Very good question. My parents asked me the same thing. I bet. They were like the number it rated, the number one place to work for like three years in a row while I was at Google. There was frozen yogurt, like 10 feet from my desk and like a bouncy house. It was just like the most insane thing ever. And the truth is, I knew that at 25,

I probably had a narrow window where I didn't have kids. At the time I wasn't married, I had six months of savings under my belts and all these entrepreneurial ideas I'd wanted to try my entire life. And so, worst case scenario, if I spent six months figuring out if I should be an entrepreneur and testing out one of the ideas and it failed, I knew I could go get a job either back at Google

or somewhere else. Like, I had something on my resume, I was a smart person, I could go back to the corporate world. And if I didn't try at 25, when else would I do it? I knew that I would probably get into like getting married having kids. It's so busy. I'm not I do it? I knew that I would probably get into like getting married, having kids. It's so busy. I'm not sleeping like, and I just wouldn't do it. And then I do think the naivete being young really helps you sometimes. It's like pretty clear that a lot of young people start companies because they just don't know what they're getting into. And frankly, I'm glad I did that back then. That's not to say, though, that you can't start a company at getting into. And frankly, I'm glad I did that back then. That's not to say, though, that you can't start a company at any age. I mean, I've worked with

70-year-old women who are starting companies, and it's just as powerful of an experience for them, too. So what was the final moment that you said, you know what now is I have to do it now? Was there an actual tipping point that occurred for you? It was my four year anniversary, to be honest, at Google. It felt like I had literally done my college MBA or something, every four years. At that point, I was also just repeating patterns. I had built three different products within Google. I knew how to launch a product.

I knew it would work within engineers and product managers. But most importantly, back to the data, I saw in the data that how to search queries on Google and YouTube were always the top search queries of the year, and they skewed female. And yet, the search results behind them from eHow.com and these really boring websites were not really that interesting to me who at the time was 25. And I thought to myself, oh, I wish I could help women like me find the tools and the instructions

and how to get smarter and how to do things. And at the time, also Pinterest had started and that was a massive following with all women. And I was like, women are going to learn shit. Like, I teach them shit. I like creating stuff. Like, I should do this. I think, frankly, too, as I was preparing for my wedding,

which was later that year, I fell back in love with DIY. And actually, the data does show, now that we've done all this research, that women, on average average get married at 26 and that correlates to the same time point where women start to believe in their creative confidence again. There are a bunch of studies on this. And so I really do think that getting married and having babies pulls something out of women that forces them to be creative because they want to choose the flower arrangements and the colors and the event design and and that sort of like can snowball into creating a more creative creatively

confident woman herself and that definitely happened for me and and so all of those things just kind of triage together and I was like I think I got to do this and so I did. So where did you start you you had this big idea with and you mentioned this for a lot of people have a big idea but they say I you know I've got it but now where do I go? Where did you begin? Well so originally it was after my wedding and a bunch of my friends who went to the wedding who were women were like Brit I've never seen anything like that. How did you literally make wooden flowers? Like I wish I could be creative. I wish I could be creative but kept like that. How did you literally make wooden flowers? Like, I wish I could be creative. I wish I could be creative.

They kept saying that. And I was like, what you can. And so I at first decided I would create this company that would talk a lot about creative ideas and how to's. But then it would really be like a multi-pronged map strategy where we'd have like a wedding app, a home app, you know, a food and cooking app, and you know, you would download each one of our apps

to use while you were cooking or decorating your home or whatever. And the content hub was just gonna be like the central place where you learned about these apps and ultimately it was a marketing vehicle to get you to download them. What ended up happening was like all the women loved the content and worked out letting the apps. And this was a really pivotal point in the Britain code journey because we had to at one point make a call to change directions. And we shut down our first app. It was a wedding app.

directions. And we shut down our first app. It was onwards we went. And what were some of the big lessons that you have from launching your own business that you want to share with people, that you do share with people on your new teaching programs? Yes, so, well, the first thing I would say again is trust the data and trust that you're probably going to be wrong when you first start your business.

The hypothesis you have will probably be misproven or taken in a whole different direction based on your customer's feedback. I think a lot of times entrepreneurs fail because they're so wedded to their idea being the only path forward. When in fact, it might just be a clue on the trail to what your customers actually want

or the problem you actually should be solving. And I think that's happened over and over again. Like Airbnb is a great example. Ryan, the founder who actually is a friend of mine was literally looking for a couch to stay on when he was traveling for different conferences. He didn't have that much money. And, you know, it birthed as couch surfing. That was the whole premise of Airbnb.

But when it ended up happening, was that the customers were like, it would actually be cool if I could rent an entire room or an entire apartment or house from somebody. And so they, of course, pivoted into that direction. If Brian would have been hellbent on a couch-only rental program, I don't think Airbnb would have been as successful as it is today. And so listen to your users, listen to the data, don't be married to your idea. That's definitely a big step. The second step is to fake it until you make it.

And I think this is particularly important for women. For some reason, and I'm speaking generally, not for all women, we tend to be a little bit more risk-adverse and a little bit more insecure when it comes to flaunting our talents and experiences. And oftentimes women don't take the leap into entrepreneurship because they think they're not smart enough, they've never done this before, you know, wouldn't be perfect. They don't know the exact right idea. Like there's just so many obstacles stopping them. It all comes back to self-doubt. And so if you can quiet the self-doubt and think about it as a six-month experiment of your life where you're just going to try some stuff and put it out there,

even when it's messy, to see what's fixed, I bet you will be really shocked by the outcome of that. And at the end of the day, not only will you feel more tied to one of your ideas and moving it forward, but so will real humans out there who want what you have to offer. And so I think just starting and sort of speaking with confidence about what you're doing, whether that's to your users, your friends, your grandma, or investors, that's a huge step in the process. So you're winding down with the podcast. Sounds like you have no plans to leave the couch tonight.

Nope, you just want to unzip your jeans, slip on a pair of fuzzy slippers, and rip open a bag of skinny pop popcorn. Because the only place you're going tonight is the bottom of this bag of popcorn. I'm on this journey with me. I'm on this journey with me, with me, with me. It's very feeling driven, meaning that like, if something kind of interests me or peeks my interest and kind of like tickles my soul, then I'm gonna say yes, even if I'm not invited or,

you know, like, if it gives me like this, hmm, this fear a little bit, then I say yes, because it's a new experience. And if I try it one time and I hate it, then I know. If I try it one time and I'm not sure, then I'll try it again. And that's how I literally fell into NASCAR. I went and said yes to a thing that I thought we were gonna be driving the darn car,

and we went and hit lug nuts and I'm telling you, I was mad. Like, I didn't wanna be there. I was like, trying to call my friend and tell him to get me out of here, you know, to be like call on emergency and so I was like, okay, I'll hang out for the day. Like I said, I would and I'm telling you,

if I had had more information, I would have definitely said no. And I showed up and then I was like, what is this and they were like, what is this? And they're like, this is what we're gonna be doing today. And so it literally changed my career path 100%. And I got excited and it scared me. And so I had to do it.

I just have to like get out of my own head and get out of my way and just know that something really beautiful when you need my half. Oh, that sounds so exciting. And it's so funny that you were mad you weren't getting a chance to drive. Oh yeah, I was going to be changing tires. What? And then like it was just the coolest day. I can remember the day so clearly.

It was the coolest day ever and you ended up loving it. Loved it. Had a whole career. I went into actually funny stories that when I started working on a pit crew, I was early 30s. And so people in my position were retiring because of their age and their inability

to keep up with the sports to me because it's really hard on your body. And so there I am. There's another reason. One, I'm the only female that's ever done it. Two, people are retiring before they're my age. And I'm coming in as a new whippersnapper, you know, basically agent, old woman into this new sport that I've never done before. And it would be really easy to say, nope, not qualified, nope, nope, nope.

And I was like, screw it, let's have some fun. Like, I love having fun. And that's why I love my workouts. That's why I love like trying things. It's not always going to be a party, but you should enjoy it as much as possible. That's so true and no better time to be talking about this during a global pandemic, because I know for me,

and I have plenty of days I just think, I just need to survive this time. I just need to live through this time and I'm forgetting about what you're saying. Like, no, it's not about just surviving, it's about thriving and enjoying your time and it is easy to forget about that given really easy. The situation that all of us are in

with both of us having our kids at home where typically they would be at school and life would be very different. You know, I used to say put on your lip gloss and go have a fun day. But now it's like put on the wingliner because you have a mask. And like I said, you know, me like loyal is home this week, he was on last week, very unexpected through a few wrenches in my schedule. But it's fine. Like we're going to have an adventure later today.

He's gonna try something new. I'm gonna live through his experience. I'm probably gonna try something new. We're gonna have a blast. And it's just like, what's the point if you're not enjoying your period? That is so, so good. Thank you for that reminder.

Because definitely I needed that one today. So one of the things that I noticed on your social media, which I am over here applauding you and sharing you on, you are so confident the way that you show up on social and truly fearless, right? How is it that you're able to do that? And I mean, one of the most recent photoshoots

you have is freaking amazing op-a-charts, unbelievable, it's so proud of you. But I know just being another female that's on social media that you must get haters. How do you handle the haters when they come? I feel like there's a few different types of haters. There's haters that are just gonna, they just talk down, like they're just mean. And usually actually it's really sad because a lot of my young kids, like 12, 13, 14, you know, like early teens, eight. I've gotten, yeah, it's just wild. I have a lot of opinions on

social media accountability, but for me, like, especially if somebody, like, I've had really hateful messages sent to me, it depends on the tone. Sometimes I'll choose to educate them, meaning like one person got upset because I was implied nude and they were like, you're a mother. Like, first of all, I gave birth naked. That's what our body's fucking do. You know, newsflash.

We were born naked. We're gonna leave this world naked. There's a lot of naked days in between. And like, what does that have to do with anything? Like, it was very tasteful. Like, even if it wasn't, it's still my right. It's my right whether I'm a mother or not. And so, I went on a little, little tangent in the sense of like,

I don't push back in a negative way. I like to educate so people can take the information and go on or change their opinion. So normally I will kind of softly and a but also very concisely just like let them know like, Hey, look, this is one my Instagram. You're coming into my my home. Yeah, I'm a public figure, but you came to you click that follow me button. figure, but you came to you clicked that follow me button, you clicked the comment, you clicked, and decided what you were going to put out there through your voice on social media. That's when you, you don't have to participate in my world if you don't want to. And that's usually like the message that I that I claim is like, I'm not asking you to follow me. I don't need you to.

I claim is like, I'm not asking you to follow me. I don't need you to. So whether I have a million followers or one follower, I'm gonna still be myself. And that's where my confidence comes is because I'm not trying to be anything other than me. I think that's where people's interior raise when they're trying to post for the masses and get likes by everybody.

And I'm like, nah, I like myself more than just likes for. I'm gonna make a move again. I decided to change that tiny amount. And if I fail, I could have been more excited for what you're getting here, start learning and growing. And inevitably something will happen. You know what?

16 to 11. You don't stop and look around once in a while. You can miss it. I hope you're enjoying this episode so far. I'm Jennifer Cohen, host the top ranking business and entrepreneur podcast, Habitson Hustle, apart the YAP media network, the number one business and self improvement podcast network. So, most people live the life they get and not the life they want. And I'm here to change all that.

My goal with each episode is to give you the habit and hustle tips you need to show up to your life better, bigger, and bolder. Tune in now, and I'll not only help you answer the questions like what do you want most in life, and why don't you have it, but we'll also help you make it a reality. I also pick the brains of top thought leaders

on how they've gone to the top, and the advice they have to help you get there too. Head over to Habitson Hustle, once you've done listening to this episode, and get one step closer to boldness, one episode at a time. You're getting a diploma. You can't eat a diploma, but you can eat wings and charles.

Get 23% off any order, 30 or 50 piece wings. When you use promo code 23gr at charlie's dot com. That's promo code 23 GRAD at charlie's dot com. Charlies as wings.