Crime Stories with Nancy Grace - 'COOL MOM' Has Teens DRINK, PERFORM SEX ACTS; MORE DISTURBING COMPUTER SEARCHES

Episode Date: October 28, 2023

Shannon O'Connor throws wild parties for her teenage sons at their Los Gatos, California mansion. O'Connor pressures teens as young as 13 to binge drink, smoke marijuana, and perform sex acts with eac...h other, "consensual" or not, while she watches. O'Connor keeps the parties a secret from other parents and her own husband, even continuing them at a new address in Idaho. O'Connor now awaits trial on 39 felony charges, including child endangerment and sexual battery. In court documents, prosecutors reveal  O’Connor’s  Google searches included, “Good books with young sex,” “hot 16 (year) old teenage girls,” and “prettiest 16 year old girl.” Joining Nancy Grace Today: Sam Dordulian - Sexual Assault Attorney, Former Los Angeles County Sex Crimes Prosecutor, and Founder of Dordulian Law Group; Twitter: @DordulianLaw  Dr. Angela Arnold - Psychiatrist, Atlanta, Ga.; Expert in the Treatment of Pregnant/Postpartum Women; Former Assistant Professor of Psychiatry, Obstetrics and Gynecology: Emory University; Former Medical Director of The Psychiatric Ob-Gyn Clinic at Grady Memorial Hospital; Voted My Buckhead’s Best Psychiatric Practice of 2022 Michael Bock - Former NYPD sergeant detective squad supervisor of special victims, owner of ‘First Rate Investigations ‘that specializes in adult survivors and child survivor civil cases;' Twitter:@F_R_Consulting Anna Sonoda - Child Grooming Expert, Licensed Clinical Social Worker, and Author: “Duck Duck Groom: Understanding How a Child Becomes a Target”  Drew Penner - Reporter at the Los Gatan Newspaper; Twitter: @losgatan See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Transcript
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Starting point is 00:00:00 This is an iHeart Podcast. Crime Stories with Nancy Grace. Wow. Talk about a cool mom. Oh, this woman, a California mom accused of hosting highly inappropriate. Well, okay. You say tomato. I say tomato. You say inappropriate gatherings. I say felony child mistreatment, felony child abuse. Yeah, that's what I call it. A California mom accused of hosting inappropriate gatherings for her 15-year-old son and his friends,
Starting point is 00:00:55 including lots of alcohol, luring 14-year-old girls to her $4.7 million Los Gatos residence, and encouraging sex between the teens. I don't know that I would call that a cool mom. I'm Nancy Grace. This is Crime Stories. Thanks for being with us here at SiriusXM 111. Wow. Cool mom? You know, when I think of cool mom, I think of the Lindsay Lohan movie, one of her greats, Mean Girls.
Starting point is 00:01:31 That was the name of it. And you have the Cool Mom who tried to be one of the teens and encouraged them to misbehave. Well, this is so much more than that. This woman, Shannon O'Connor, accused of luring 14 and 15-year-olds to her multi-million dollar home in Los Gatos, has now been busted, reportedly, with her internet searches. Why do people still make incriminating Internet searches? What's incriminating? Quote, good books with young sex. OK, I don't like that right there.
Starting point is 00:02:16 Quote, hot 16 year old teenage girls. Don't like that. Quote, prettiest 16-year-old girl and, I mean, would any raunchy list be complete without, quote, tits and ass? I mean, really? People are still saying that? Seriously? Anyway, it takes on a whole new meaning when you know it's a mom of a teen boy who hosts parties at her home constantly for teens. That surge would have me disturbed, but I'm sure the other moms and dads didn't know about it.
Starting point is 00:02:50 Her phone allegedly also contained videos that had been downloaded from various media platforms, social media, including TikTok, depicting young girls in skimpy clothing. Okay. Also young girls appearing to be underage dressed in revealing clothing. Now, I don't know that any of these girls were actually known by the so-called cool mom. But I know that in legal documents, quote, when defendant was arrested, her phone was recovered and searched. The following Google searches relevant to her charges of annoying or molesting a child
Starting point is 00:03:31 were found on her phone. Good books with young sex, hot 16 year old teenage girls, prettiest 16 year old girl, and of course, tits and ass. Gosh, this woman, can you imagine looking on your mom's iPad and seeing those searches? Okay. What more do we know? The so-called party mom facing 39 criminal counts of felony child endangerment and sex battery. Some of the victims as young as 13. Take a listen to our friends at NBC. The first complaint about Shannon O'Connor
Starting point is 00:04:06 to Los Gatos High School came from a parent in December 2020, according to internal school emails obtained exclusively by the investigative unit. Shannon Bruga or O'Connor buys alcohol for teenagers. My daughter overdosed on edibles. Then-enterant principal Paul Robinson responded the same day. We will follow up on this and inform the police. Two months later, February 17th, a different parent sent an assistant principal a detailed, multi-page email saying she had just filed a police report alleging criminal contact by O'Connor with her child and at least five other 14-year-old girls, as well as at least one Fisher middle school student.
Starting point is 00:04:43 A middle school student, 14-year-old girls going to sex and booze, stoked parties, and criminal contact by the cool mom with a girl student age 14? What in the hay? With me, an all-star panel to make sense of what we know right now but first i want to go to drew pinner investigative reporter with the los gatan newspaper drew thank you for being with us who is this quote cool mom it doesn't sound cool to me it sounds criminal does she have a child oh yeah definitely this is uh shannon o'connor and she has other names that she's gone by in the past. Shannon Bruga, Shannon Amaral.
Starting point is 00:05:30 But she is a local woman here from the Los Gatos area. And that's in Silicon Valley. And she gained a reputation over the months for being as you said someone that would have parties and someone who would invite folks over to her house that were younger than maybe you would invite over to your house and that's putting it lightly and she does have children she's got two teen sons 13 and 15 and you know to dr. Angie Arnold renowned psychiatrist joining us out of the Atlanta jurisdiction, you can find her at AngelaArnoldMD.com.
Starting point is 00:06:11 You heard what Drew Penner just told us, that everybody in the neighborhood knew rumor, gossip. They knew what was going on, but did anybody stop it? Not until things got even more out of hand. In addition to what Drew Penner told us, Angie, how many times have I told the children starting at a very young age about drugs and alcohol? All the time. What it does to you. Yeah. Cases I've seen in court. Specifically, I remember when I was a brand new assistant district attorney, I was taking a guilty plea and she was taking a plea DUI, HV, habitual violator.
Starting point is 00:06:53 And I looked around for her family. There was no family, but I knew she was married with three children. Alcohol cost her her stockbroker's license that she worked so hard for, had worked her way up the ladder in that business. She had a horrible car crash when drunk. Her husband divorced her and he got custody of three children because of alcohol. And I remember she just stood there in court just like she was numb, like she didn't even cry. You know, like when you take the dog to the vet and they have to get a shot and they sit on the table, they know something bad is about to happen, but they just sit there stoically.
Starting point is 00:07:37 That's what she looked like. Alcohol. And this is a mom with teens throwing this kind of party, not just alcohol, but drugs and sex. So, Nancy, why would why would no one have said anything? Because look at all of the other people that can be hurt by not saying anything, starting with the offender. This she needed help. OK, you know, why did I ask you a question? She does not need help.
Starting point is 00:08:10 She needs jail because these aren't just wild parties. This is sex assault, child molestation, felony child endangerment. So I don't know what you're talking about. She needs help. Well, she needs a nice long vacation in the pen, in the big dollhouse, so she can think about her actions. But Nancy, at the very least, if the neighbors knew what was going on and they didn't know the extent to what was going on. Oh, please. Have you ever seen Bewitched? Yes, no. Have you? Then you're
Starting point is 00:08:46 familiar with Gladys Kravitz, right? The nosy neighbor who knows everything. You want to tell me these neighbors didn't know exactly what was happening? Hearing teens screaming and cavorting in the backyard around the keg. Oh, they knew. But this is my question. Drew Penner back to Los Gatos newspaper. Drew, I understand that the first complaints were made to the school principal and then an assistant principal. Is that correct? Yeah. You know, this has been an interesting case in our town because it's sparked off a whole discussion around what we do, you know, when people are having parties in their own private home, but then the ramifications can spill out into the public sphere, including, as you mentioned, at the high school. And there's stories that we're hearing and that have come out throughout the various discussions that we've been hearing, is that basically Shannon O'Connor had a really good way of manipulating the whole situation,
Starting point is 00:09:48 basically being able to spin things one way and, in fact, enlisting the children that she was inviting and many say manipulating over to her house into kind of going on the forefront and helping her spread false stories in order to continue her behavior. And, you know, that's something that we hear time and time again. And, you know, the extent to which perhaps the authorities at the school should have done more, that's been a hot button issue. So that over into even the local councils come up indirectly as well. And yeah, it's been the talk of the town. You know, that's a really good point. I'm going to go to Anna Sinoda, a child grooming expert.
Starting point is 00:10:29 But first, let me just swing to Sam Dordulian. He is a renowned attorney, former L.A. County prosecutor and founder of the Dordulian Law Group. You can find them at Dlawgroup.com. Sam, thanks for being with us. Just thinking through what Drew Penner told us from the Luskotan, you know, Sam, here's the rub, here's the fly in the ointment. So you have the parents, they are speaking out to the wrong person. They contact the school principal and the assistant principal. So do they get the idea they're doing the right thing? And how much can a school really control what students or, quote, cool moms are doing off school premises, Sam Dordulian?
Starting point is 00:11:22 Yeah, Nancy, and actually, that's a good question. Why didn't they call the police? And I think it's a lot to do with who this person is. If this was a male, if this was a teacher, if this was a coach, a male coach, I think people would react differently. Because she's a woman, because she's a mom in particular, I think they're treating it differently. They're contacting the school instead of contacting the police. I mean, you brought up the word grooming.
Starting point is 00:11:48 This is the definition of grooming. It doesn't have to be a male teacher or coach or a priest. She was grooming, not just the children, but the other parents, the whole community with her conduct. So I think a lot has to do with who she is as a woman and as a mom. You know, you just struck me to the core as a mom because, you know, Anna Sonoda, going from Sam Dordulian, Dr. Angie Arnold, Andrew Penner, let me tell you who Anna Sonoda is. She is a child grooming expert, clinical social worker,
Starting point is 00:12:24 author of Duck, Duck, Groom, Understanding How a Child Becomes a Target. And you can find her at AnnaSunoda.com. Anna, I want you to take a listen to our friend Amanda Del Castillo. Shannon O'Connor, the Los Gatos mother, is accused of throwing drunken parties where she encouraged young teens to participate in sex acts, sometimes non-consensual and sometimes while she watched. The teens, mostly 14 and 15 years old, included her own son. O'Connor would use Snapchat or text to invite them to her home, warning the teens to keep silent or she could go to jail.
Starting point is 00:13:01 It's not exactly your classic grooming, but it has all the elements of a classic grooming. Luring, desensitizing the victim where this little 14-year-old girl says, well, everybody else is doing it. The mom is sitting there watching me having a sex act with her son. So maybe it's not as bad as I thought because the mom thinks it's okay. And then getting them, getting a vow of silence, warning them not to speak out. Nancy, this is a gruesome, gruesome example of grooming. And just so that everybody's on the same page, grooming is the intentional and selective process of using assumed trust to gain access and space with an identified prey. And it is a process of entrapping a child.
Starting point is 00:13:50 So we've got to set the trap with compliments. These children were selected. She was pre-vetting the girls who were attending these parties. Then you've got to bait the trap with favors. So giving the kids things they want, like access to free food, alcohol. Then you've essentially rigged the trap with guilt. Here are these kids who are breaking rules that their parents have for them, and then you've got to keep that trap shut with threats. You can't tell anybody.
Starting point is 00:14:17 Keep this a secret. So worse than being a cool mom, she was perceived and the community defaulted to her being a safe mom. And she was the one who was communicating with other parents to confirm that she would be in attendance and she would be supervising. And this is why parents need to keep a keen eye to show up at places where their kids are going. And when in doubt, verify, even if it means showing up. I'm just trying to drink in everything that you just said. Whenever the twins have anybody over throughout the evening or the afternoon or whatever it may be, I like to take pictures of them and send to the mom because that's what I like. I don't know if the other moms even want that, but I like that to see what the twins are doing when they're not at home and make sure they're safe and alive.
Starting point is 00:15:01 I haven't even thought about an adult plying them with alcohol and drugs and having sex with them. Crime stories with Nancy Grace. The so-called cool mom, a.k.a. party mom, has pled not guilty to all the charges filed by the Santa Clara County District Attorney's Office. You know what? When you leave a Google trail mile, a mile wide, you got problems because if it's just eyewitness testimony by one or even two witnesses you might have a chance but when you start getting more and more eyewitness testimony testimony from neighbors what they saw what they heard what they observed now with google searches to back it up O'Connor hosting the parties inside her 5,000-plus square foot Los Gatos home, which listed earlier this year for nearly $5 million. It's a two-acre property.
Starting point is 00:16:14 It's got a pool, a spa, a sports court, nanny quarters, and five bedrooms. Wow. Five en suite bedrooms. Wow. Five en suite bedrooms. The victims in this case include, the alleged victims include male and female male Los Gatos High School students, including her own two sons. Now, according to prosecutors, she would lure the youngsters to her home and, quote, facilitated sexual encounters between minors. Important, both consensual and non-consensual. Some victims reporting the cool mom watched as they were sex assaulted. Okay, what more do we know? Michael Bott joining me, former NYPD sergeant, detective squad supervisor, a special victims unit, owner of First Rate Investigations, and that specializes in adult and child survivor civil cases at firstrateinvestigationsandconsulting.com. That is a mouthful, Michael Bach.
Starting point is 00:17:23 I want you to change that website immediately. Hey, Michael, I know you've dealt with a lot of cases where adults molest children. I rarely see, I don't know that I've ever seen. I got to think this thing through. I've seen female sex predators on children. But for a mom, a cool mom, and I'm talking about Amy Poehler, who I adore. Amy Poehler, who played the cool mom June George in Mean Girls. Hilarious, but this is not funny in the least. Michael Bach, have you ever seen a case where the mom lures in the child victims to have sex with teen boys while she sits there and watches? It's not a frequent occurrence, especially inside the city. I'd say this is probably more of a suburban issue than it would be inside the city with apartments and stuff. So it's not a common case that we would come across in the city. I don't think I've ever
Starting point is 00:18:30 come across anything quite like it. And these people, Michael Bach, I mean, this is Silicon Valley with all of that tech money just rolling around. The median income in this area is $167,000. That's the median. Yeah, it's big money. Yeah, they've got a lot of money to roll around in and a lot of money to throw parties with for children. I mean, Dr. Angie, you hear Michael Buck speaking. What frame of mind is that where a grown woman gets sex gratification off of watching
Starting point is 00:19:07 little girls and teen boys have sex in her home? Oh, Nancy, this is such a horrible subject, isn't it? Yes, but I was expecting a little something a little more clinical from you than this is horrible. Yeah, I know it's horrible. I can ask anybody on the street that, Dr. Angie. I know it's horrible. But what is, what kind of a criminal mind is that? These kind of people can suffer from a very low self-esteem. Oh, dear Lord in heaven. Low self-esteem? Well, I mean, Nancy, this is, you asked for a definition. She's a child molester. Well, okay. But we have to kind of look at all of the things that can, first of all, female child predators are on the rare side.
Starting point is 00:19:52 Okay? They can have antisocial personality disorder. They can have very poor social skills. They can have PTSD from something or another. Don't even try to make me feel badly for her. I'm really not. Rejection, low self-esteem. I'm not.
Starting point is 00:20:10 How about child molester? Here is Dr. Jackie and you're waving a sign saying voyeurism. Okay. You know what that is, right, Dr. Angie? I mean, you are the shrink. Yes, I do. Now, to be a psychiatrist, don't you have to be a medical doctor and a psychiatrist? I'm a medical doctor. Okay, and I'm having to tell you the word voyeurism. But Nancy, I've
Starting point is 00:20:30 had to treat women who were female sexual predators. I've treated only a very few because only a very few exist. What is wrong with them? Not that the state has to prove motive or kick around inside the mind of a perpetrator, but it's very hard for me to take in. I know it exists, but it's hard for me to take in. But doesn't it also sound like this woman, this particular criminal was, was, was exerting a lot of control over her victims. They were very young. She's 47. They're 13 and 14 years old. You know, she's got to be getting some sort of sexual pleasure out of this at the very baseline. I've already said that. That was my question that I formed for you. What grown woman enjoys watching little children have forced sex? A very sick grown woman enjoys watching little children have forced sex?
Starting point is 00:21:25 A very sick grown woman. Once again, I knew that myself and I am not an MD. Nancy, she may have been abused in her past. Oh, dear. You know what? Just go ahead and cut her mic because all you're doing is whine, whine, whine about how badly this. Well, I still hear her. Hello. Women, the women that I'm going to give you a moment to reconsider your opinion. Dr. Angela Arnold, what more do we know? Take a listen to our friends at KRON4.
Starting point is 00:21:54 O'Connor has two sons, ages 13 and 15, the same age range that the victims are in this case. Deputies in Idaho determined her sons were in imminent danger and placed them under the custody of the Idaho Department of Health and Welfare. Law enforcement first began to investigate O'Connor after a boy was injured when he fell from her SUV in the Los Gatos High School parking lot. The district attorney said O'Connor went to great lengths to keep the party's secret from other parents, law enforcement and her own husband. She would only invite teens over to the house for a wild night of drinking when she knew her husband would not be home. She communicated with students using Snapchat. So I didn't realize this, Drew Penner, she was married and the husband knew nothing about
Starting point is 00:22:41 what was going on? Well, that's kind of an open question. You know, there's some evidence that shows that she, you know, seemed to be hiding the beer cans or whatnot from her husband prior to him getting home, so he didn't find out about these parties that were going on. On the other hand, there does seem to be, you know, a close connection between them. They are co-defendants in a previous action. And, you know, so that is something that is still coming out. It's really hard for me to believe that he had no idea what was going on. Guys, I want
Starting point is 00:23:18 you to listen to this. Sam Dordulian, a sex assault lawyer, former LA County sex crimes prosecutor. Now this is going down in Los Gatos, California and, uh, and a very prestigious community. Parties also took place in Santa Cruz and Lake Tahoe where the cool mom, Shannon O'Connor, would ply 14 and 15 year olds with vodka and then hand out condoms, encouraging minors to have sex and laughing when the teens would engage in sex acts, many of which allegedly were non-consensual. Take a listen to our cut for KGO. Investigators say the party spanned from June 2020 to May 2021 and often involved O'Connor pushing the teens to drink until they became sick or blacked out.
Starting point is 00:24:19 The DA's office says some of the assaults against the young victims happened while they were drunk. Documents show teens also told authorities drinking led to heavy vomiting, a broken finger, and a girl reporting she almost drowned in a hot tub. In a release, DA Jeff Rosen said, it took a lot of brave children to come forward and to untangle this deeply disturbing case. In another case, the DA's office says O'Connor let a teen drive her SUV in the Los Gatos High parking lot while two other teens held onto the back. One fell off, knocked unconscious.
Starting point is 00:24:50 Okay, also take a listen to Amy Larson, KRON. A 47-year-old mom is accused of throwing sex parties at her Los Gatos mansion. She pressured underage teenagers to binge drink and encouraged boys to have consensual and non-consensual sex with girls, according to the Santa Clara County District Attorney's Office. Investigators said dozens of Los Gatos high school students went to Shannon O'Connor's disturbing parties between June of 2020 and May of this year. The mom recently moved to Attic County in Idaho, where she continued to invite teens over to her new house. Detectives told me that when they went to the house to arrest her last weekend, there were 12 underage teenagers with her, most of whom had spent the
Starting point is 00:25:38 night. So let me understand this, Drew Penner, the students would actually spend the night in the home? Well, some of these parties would go on for an awful long time. And, you know, at one point I tried knocking on the doors of some of the neighbors' homes, and they didn't really want to say too much to me about what they had seen or hadn't seen. I don't know if people felt guilty for not saying things sooner, or maybe they did keep certain things under wrap but um you know there's definitely um a lot of uh questioning even by shannon o'connor who was you know googling as we have reported you know things like what to do with the concussion in a teenager and you know can a concussion cause eye problems and you know investigate you know people and
Starting point is 00:26:24 investigators seem to think that that may be related to um that car incident exactly you had just you know heard about there on that news report according to court documents we've just obtained quote evidence admitted at preliminary hearing will show offenses alleged were committed by defendant as a result of a sexual compulsion and for the purpose of sexual gratification, the deputy district attorney wrote. Okay. She had a consistent approach involving helping minors sneak out of their own homes, arranging transportation for them via Snapchat or texting, getting them drunk to the point of vomiting, losing consciousness,
Starting point is 00:27:09 and then foisting sex activity upon them. What is this woman thinking? Sam Dorduli and joining a sex assault lawyer, former L.A. County sex crimes prosecutor, naked twister, with a bunch of teen girls and boys in your home. I mean, I cringed when I heard Dr. Angela Arnold talking about, oh, she's got low self-esteem. She's probably been rejected. Don't care.
Starting point is 00:27:39 This is child molestation. I mean, Dordulian, do you have any children? I have two children. In fact, one about the same age as these kids. At 13, going to the mom's house down the street, and then to find out later she was egged into sex acts and given drugs and alcohol by the so-called cool mom, I would do a backflip. Yeah, I can't even imagine. And look, Nancy, in 25 plus years I've been doing sex crimes, I haven't heard a story like this.
Starting point is 00:28:10 And again, I think a lot has to do, the reason why this continued and was allowed to fester and she was allowed to do all these things is because of her status as a mom, as a woman. I've prosecuted a lot of these cases. I've tried in civil court a lot of these cases. You don't see a lot of sexual predators who are women. I do have them. I've had them before. Nothing like this. And we have an inherent trust of mothers, don't we? You know, you believe,
Starting point is 00:28:36 you want to believe, especially since she's a mom of someone, a child of your child's age, she's not going to hurt them. She's going to protect them. That's what we all want to believe. And I think that belief allowed this to continue. And the reason why, you know, parents are going to the school instead of the police. We have a different impression of female sexual offenders, but they're just as dangerous as we see in this particular case. Well, you know, an interesting point, Sam Durdulian. If a dad was throwing a party, I don't know how many teen girls' parents would even let them go. I wouldn't. I certainly wouldn't let my daughter go. I have a distrust of males. O-H-E-L-L-N-O. I say you're not going to a party at some pervy dad's house.
Starting point is 00:29:21 That's not happening. Oh, okay. Cringe. You know, I'm going to go back to Dr. Angeli Arnold. I guess we can turn our mic back on. You know, you've given me just enough information over the years to throw something back at you. You're talking about how she has low self-esteem and low self-worth and was probably rejected in her life. I assume the next thing you're going to say is this is a desperate cry for help. How about a manipulative narcissist with no conscience? Would that shoe fit? Yes, it would.
Starting point is 00:29:57 Yes, it would, Nancy. And I'll tell you something else. The reason nobody's calling and reporting her is because the research has shown that if you report that you have been abused by a female, more times than not, you are not believed. I didn't think of that. You're absolutely correct. And guess what else gave her the indicia of responsibility and her mom's status secured. She's living in a $4.7 million mansion. I bet they've got a pool.
Starting point is 00:30:35 I know they've got a hot tub because one girl almost drowned in their hot tub drunk. $4.7 million home up there in Los Gatos. A, quote, tech-savvy predator who taught the teens to lie using gifts in order to bait the girls. Whoa, wait. We haven't even touched on that, Drew Penner. Drew Penner, investigative reporter at the Los Gatos. What kind of gifts did she use to bait the teen girls? Well, I mean, if you know the Bay Area at all, you know that just over the hill, you've got Santa Cruz. And that's a pretty awesome destination to go to.
Starting point is 00:31:15 And people like going on trips there. Same with Tahoe. So if you get invited along to a trip to one of those places, I mean, who wouldn't want to go? Keep in mind, these are kids that don't have access to just head out on a weekend trip on their own, you know, and, you know, so that's one thing, you know, getting these, the alcohol supplied, I mean, that's not exactly easy when you're a kid. And, you know, I just, I think that there's a lot of this affection that's been showered on them as well by Miss O'Connor, as we hear in, you know, from some of the affection that's been showered on them as well by Miss O'Connor, as we hear
Starting point is 00:31:46 in from some of the stories that we've been reporting on, including, you know, that that may have been a technique, this flattery in order to build trust and bonds. That's classic grooming, Drew Panter. One other thing I wanted to say was just that, if you don't mind, was just that I think that we have to keep in mind that this is this is someone that, you know, she had on her phone. It turns out, as we've now reported, like a video of a girl saying that, you know, talking about her own body image. And we don't know if this is someone she knew or something she downloaded from TikTok, but this is pointing to the fact that, you know, she had not just a desire to help her own child perhaps hook up, but, you know, there's some question around, was she maybe looking for having, let's say, a bad interest in 16-year-olds, for example. One of the searches on her phone
Starting point is 00:32:45 was hot 16-year-old teenage girls and prettiest 16-year-old girl. Good books with young sex. That's something that just came out recently. One young girl who is going only by the name Jane Doe 8 says that cool mom O'Connor, quote, tore my life apart. I've suffered and had to deal with the reputation of being, quote, the girl that got raped. I will live my high school years with this cloud over me. Victims say that O'Connor befriended them through her children and social media when they were just freshmen at Los Gatos High. This Jane Doe 8 says, Shannon does not have a conscience. She's a con artist. I will never have the life I once had, and neither should she. She says that O'Connor would have boys get
Starting point is 00:33:34 drunk and then drunkenly sex assault the girls while O'Connor watched. One of these girls, Jane Doe 9, actually had to take out a protection order against O'Connor after she realized O'Connor had been following her around with no headlights on. The girl still has nightmares today. One girl says that O'Connor moved into her town and the little girl got 27 calls with no caller ID, but with Shannon, O'Connor moved into her town and the little girl got 27 calls with no caller ID. But with Shannon O'Connor on the other end breathing into the phone. Does anybody have a concern about what took so long to bring this woman to justice? Here's another theory. In addition to Julia Pinter's theory that she was sexually interested in young teen girls and boys, did she actually want to be a child again?
Starting point is 00:34:48 Crime Stories with Nancy Grace. crime stories with nancy grace welcome back we learn more about the so-called cool mom apparently very selective about the young girls she allowed to come to the parties, rejecting them if they did not meet her particular cool mom standards. Oh, my stars. Seriously? Seriously, she's a mean girl that grew up. She rejects girls. Listen to this. As guests, by saying they weren't, quote, pretty enough or didn't, quote, put out.
Starting point is 00:35:23 I don't believe I've heard that phrase since somebody said it in high school. She rejected girls because they quote weren't pretty enough or quote didn't put out. Oh my stars. Man, I would pat that jury with a bunch of parents, moms and dads of teen girls and teen boys. Girl, you're in trouble now. Now, we also learned that as soon as she learned about the police investigation, she fled reportedly to Idaho. Is that correct, Drew Penner? So it is true that what happened is that as the investigation was progressing into the conduct of Shannon O'Connor, she leaves, she goes to Idaho. And, you know, you might say, okay, maybe that's a nice coincidence or whatever for her.
Starting point is 00:36:14 But, you know, the truth is that we're starting to see that she's very aware of the fact that, you know, that there's different rules. When you have authority, local authorities investigating here. It's harder for them to reach across state lines. And in fact, at one point, she's she's she's internet searching Idaho, Idaho statute of limitations criminal. She's going, hey, can I get prosecuted in California if I live in Idaho? For instance, the searches include things about arrest warrants, statutes of limitations, and legal consequences. Oh, yeah, that doesn't show a guilty conscience at all.
Starting point is 00:36:53 I can't wait for that to come in front of a jury. Can I get prosecuted in California if I live in Idaho? You know, I've never searched that before. How do I know if there's a warrant for my arrest? Supplying alcohol to minors in a private home. And statute of limitations, California. Now, this is all according to court documents. What about it, Sam Dordulian?
Starting point is 00:37:17 She's looking for statute of limitations. How long can they prosecute me in another jurisdiction for this? She's incredibly manipulative. And it's just terrifying. The other parts that you mentioned about the whole stalking part of it. I work the stalking unit as well. And I can tell you, I'm working with the DA's office, prosecuting all sorts of criminals. There's only two that I was really, truly frightened of hardcore gang members and stalkers. And she seems to not only just be a sexual predator, but has those stalking elements on top. And it's just terrifying that she would move to a sexual predator, but has those stalking elements on top.
Starting point is 00:37:45 And it's just terrifying that she would move to a different state, be so manipulative. And there's some reference to her moving to another state where there's one of the victims actually lived. It's terrifying what this woman was doing. And to suggest that the husband had no idea about all of this, I think is just foolish, absolutely foolish. Well, we do know that he has recently filed for divorce. And do you blame him? What about a Dr. Angie Arnold, psychiatrist out of Atlanta? Is that some sort of a designated ailment?
Starting point is 00:38:14 You know, Nancy, I don't, that ailment doesn't necessarily have a name. It all goes under the, it's all under the guise of sexual predators. And it's just another way that they manipulate the system. I mean, Nancy, I have to wonder. I mean, there's so many things that are going on in our world right now that are predatory to children that we have to keep an eye out for all of those things. You know, I want to follow up with Anna Sonoda, child grooming expert and author of Duck, Duck, Groom. We're talking about various motives. Did this so-called cool mom, O'Connor, actually want to be a teen again?
Starting point is 00:38:52 Take a listen to this, Anna Sonoda. Hour cut nine from KGO. The DA's office believe an early motive for O'Connor's alleged actions is sexual gratification. Court documents say she would use social media to lure minors to her home, give them alcohol, condoms, and private rooms to commit sexual acts that sometimes were not consensual. One of the crimes that we have charged involves committing the crime for sexual gratification. So we can certainly say that sexual gratification is one of the motives in this case. What about it, Anna Sonoda? Well, Nancy, I think we have to back up a second and say that all sex, all sexual acts with anyone
Starting point is 00:39:30 under the age of 18 in California, as along with Idaho, is always non-consensual. These children don't even have the ability to consent to sex. So let's get that on the table first of all. I think one of the things we have to keep in mind, 66% of child sex abuse victims are between the ages of 12 and 17. This is a ripe atmosphere. This woman took her position. It's easy to impress teens. She was likable. She was powerful and she was popular. She was providing money, alcohol, everything was free to these kids. We don't know the socioeconomics of the children who are in that position. And we know that there were no other authority figures. She always set it up so that she was the sole adult. And she convinced other adults to trust her to supervise, protect, and prevent any damage. And she did nothing of the sort. Instead, she was pretending that she was forever 21, if you will,
Starting point is 00:40:33 and disregarding any sort of obligation as an adult or as an authority figure. So would you say, Anna Sonoda, that she has some sort of an age regression mental ailment or as the motive here, or do you believe it's for her pure sex gratification, or
Starting point is 00:40:58 so somehow she can be the quote cool mom? I actually don't think it matters why. No, it doesn't matter why. We're so fixated on why somebody would do something. The message that listeners need to get out of this example is that people who are entrusted with your child, as long as you send them into environments in which they have space and access away from proper supervision, the highest risk environment your child can ever be in is your home or someone else's home. So if these parents had just
Starting point is 00:41:33 eliminated the house parties, this wasn't happening at school. This wasn't happening at church. This wasn't happening in the local playground. This was happening at her home. Let's all wake up to the reality that our homes and when we allow our children to go to other people's homes, that is the highest risk environment. So honestly, I don't care what reason she had for acting like a teen other than grooming and looking cool and having access and then suddenly being the one almost like a big sister with it with a proper ID here are these kids who are trying to test the boundaries because that is the appropriate developmental stage that they are going through in their own adolescence a Jane Doe too did not want
Starting point is 00:42:18 to testify claiming she wants to quote forget this ever happened but her mother spoke out saying she's not here because she doesn't want Shannon O'Connor to own one more minute of her life. My daughter is not here because she's busy doing what kids their junior year should be doing, studying for AP tests, SATs, prom dress fitting, dreaming about colleges. Her life will never be the same. And I can think of five women who agree with the victim's mothers. Take a listen to our Cut 19 KRON. Five female inmates are scheduled to be arraigned in court this week after an attack on another inmate at a jail in Milpitas. Court records show the five inmates beat this Los Gatos woman,
Starting point is 00:43:05 Shannon O'Connor. It happened at the Elmwood Correctional Facility. O'Connor is accused of throwing secret alcohol-fueled parties for underage boys and girls and pressuring those teenagers into having sex with each other. Prosecutors said O'Connor lured victims to her Los Gatos mansion through social media and her sons who attended Los Gatos high school. The attack on her happened in October of last year. Court documents show deputies broke up the fight and took O'Connor to a hospital. Michael Bott, former NYPD sergeant, have you ever seen anything like it to this extent? No, it's crazy. And she knew exactly what she was doing was illegal, you know, by keeping it from the parents and conspiring with the kids to make sure they kept it from the parents. So she knew exactly what she was doing. And I do agree with your other caller that none of the acts are consensual due to age.
Starting point is 00:44:00 And she's basically an accessory to a sexual assault. She's a facilitator and she encouraged the behavior. She's just as bad as the person committing sexual assault and she must be getting gratification out of it. So much for being a cool mom, not so cool behind bars. Drew Pinter, what is the status of O'Connor's case? Oh man, so this is one of those cases that just keeps going on and on. There's been many steps and we're not even really even into the preliminary inquiry yet. It was about to start the preliminary inquiry. And then there was a legal maneuver that I personally wasn't familiar with until now, which is basically going to the judge and saying, hey, if I plead to all the charges, what would you give me?
Starting point is 00:44:46 So that's basically the step that we are in now, where I just spoke with a parent yesterday, and one of the parents told me that Shannon O'Connor has now been offered a 17-year and four-month sentence. Of course, this has not been put on the record yet, so there is a chance it could change before I hear next. However, if she decides to plead to everything, we're told that she could go away for 17 years. It could have been as much as 20, but who knows? Maybe this is just a legal maneuver to draw things out
Starting point is 00:45:22 and basically start the process all over again of the preliminary inquiry. And then if that goes forward, of course, there could be a trial later on. And this is all going after an earlier process to try to get out on bail. She's currently in pretrial custody, as you heard, there at the Elmwood facility there in Santa Clara County. And basically, her lawyer took that all the way to the California Supreme Court. So a lot of these kids, as you had heard earlier, they're saying, you know, I want my life back. And in fact, they're saying, geez, I want to at least be able to get through college, you know, and be free from, you know, any tormenting from her.
Starting point is 00:46:09 Of course, this is all now. Shannon O'Connor, we have to say, has not had a full chance to mount a defense. Of course, she could have. But this is this has not gone to trial. However, from a lot of the evidence that has come out so far, there are justices in California and judges in the California system that have pointed to the strong evidence as they see it about some of the stuff that has happened. So we have to be careful, but at the same time, we have to say, hey, this is one of those cases where there seems to be
Starting point is 00:46:39 at least some pretty strong evidence of a lot of this behavior occurring. I want to say one more thing really quickly, and that is clarifying one of the comments that was made earlier. And I believe one of the victims had said, you know, I'm known as the girl who was raped. I believe that's the same person that followed that statement up by saying, hey, that's not even my allegation. Now, that's not to say that she believes that didn't happen to other girls or possibly boys. We don't know. But what the point is, is that we also have a responsibility as a community and a society to be careful with how we look at how these situations play out. Because, you know, and, you know, we don't want to victim shame either.
Starting point is 00:47:21 You know, if these are victims, they need to be seen as victims for what happened to them. And they shouldn't be tarnished with any kind of negative reputation. When if they truly are victims, that's what they are. They're victims. As in so many other cases, the computer searches are doing cool mom, a.k.a. party Mom, given name Shannon O'Connor, they're going to do her in. Mark my words. Guys, if you know or think you know anything about this case, about so-called Cool Mom Shannon O'Connor, please dial 408-808-4400. Repeat 408-808-4400. Goodbye, friend.
Starting point is 00:48:18 This is an iHeart Podcast.

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