Critical Role & Sagas of Sundry - Alleys and Enemies | Sagas of Sundry: Goblin Mode | Episode 5

Episode Date: October 10, 2024

It’s The Minions of Mayhem versus The Marked in a back-alley brawl for the ages! But are these mysterious newcomers really their enemies? Or could the Terror Squad find new allies in their battle to get even with Fiends United? And will Tippy’s dream finally come true? Find out in this explosive new episode of Saga of Sundry: Goblin Mode. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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aka the Terror Squad. Yes. Terror! Terror! Terror squad? Will y'all tell the audience who you're playing and what you're racing classes? Yes, absolutely.

Hi, everyone, I'm Dan Casey. I am playing fibs, who is a skeleton, but also a wizard. I'm Danielle Radford. I play Busy. Busy is a skeleton and also a bard. Hi, I'm Jason Winn. I play a goblin who is also an artificer,

and he's also sweaty. And his name is Tippy. Canonically sweaty. It's canonical. Notably and canonically sweaty. I love how your intro is all said also, so it's like if you met someone at a party, you'd be like, I'm Amy, I'm also a dungeon master.

I am also a human. I'm also a human. Also sweaty, yeah. And on that note, I think it's time to part the veil of reality. And we are no longer on a two-digit two-digit numbered floor of a building. In a city, in America, probably.

It rhymes with Sklerbank. We're no longer in a place. We're actually in another place. Oh, get it off me, get it off me! Oh, oh, please, please, Mark, it's your job, it's your job. We open on a dad. on a dead end and a back alley and Nacabreca. And all of you have been chasing Crandall P. Greco Worth

and Igor type figure, your old C-level operations manager in Zuzlare, where Phibbs has just tackled him and is still holding on. And Bizzy's head, skull is still nibbling, biting down hard on his shoulder. Busy's body is a little bit further back, near Tippy, who is just a bit behind and who just whiffed a shot. For sure. Look at it next time.

Canonic with sweaty. Whoops. Just gotta remind everybody, so sorry. But the other thing that has just happened is from behind Tippy, a halfling and a dwarf have just come out. Both of them are male. It looks like they could be wearing leather armor underneath, and they're in kind of black outfits,

with red sashes tied around in red detailing, as well as, you can each tell that they've got an insignia. They've got an insignia on it that is six circles all in a circle. Okay. Six circles all in a circle. Yeah, like dots. You heard of dots. It's the ice cream of the future if you dip them.

Right, so six dots in a circle. For the candy of the past. What we're gonna do is roll initiative again. Okay, okay. Let's do it. Ooh-hoo-hoo. Oh, he likes that. I do like it.

It's Tippy's day today. Okay, anyone get a 16 or higher? Yeah, 22. 22. Okay, Tibby's at the top of that order. Tippy springing to action. Tippy at the tipy top. Okay, anyone get an 11 or higher?

Oh, oh. Sure did. Okay. I'm busy. She's busy, I'm occupied. Stop. Okay, six or higher? Seven.

Seven. Sevens. Okay, great. Then it will be. You have a higher decks modifier so you go first. Okay, perfect. Crandall will be last. Okay, let's get into it.

I'll say. Crandall shall be last. Tipi, you're up. What would you like to do? Okay, so these guys are directly behind me? Yeah. And have I noticed them? Yeah, for sure. Yeah. It was a big moment.

It was this moment where everyone paused and went like, and guns drawn, right? He's got a gun on me? Yes, the dwarf has a gun pointed at you, a pistol. Important detail. Can you describe it? The dwarf has a gun. The dwarf has a gun.

Could you please describe what the pistol looks like? Oh man, I think I'm gonna regret this. It is built out of metal. It is silver. It has some wooden detailing on the handle. And it looks like it could get off 10 shots in the chamber. Okay.

10 of the chamber? Yeah. And they've totally noticed Tippy. I'm sure. They've seen him. Yeah, so you can tell. Can I see this? Nothing in the way, right?

I'm not behind a cart or anything. No, you were never trying to. Ignore that sweaty guy, we've got a gun. Jason, are you scared? I have seven HP. And no spell slots. So I have to, I'm trying to weigh my options a little bit. So I have one action available to me, as it

as a racial skill, it's as nimble escape. You can take the disengage or hide action as a bonus action on each of your turns. I would like to take a bonus action to hide. To hide. Okay, yeah, there's plenty. There's plenty to hide behind in this back alley that seems to serve as a storage location,

I would say just on either sides of the walls, also on the back walls. So we'll say you're more on the right hand side and you can easily get behind some crates, barrels under a tarp, anything like that. TIPI immediately coweres behind a crate. Okay, awesome. So will you go ahead and roll stealth?

You got it. At disadvantage because they are looking right at me. Okay, yeah. Master of disguise. That's a crit fan. Oh no! Your pants fall down. Okay, that would be a bonus action

and you wouldn't have taken up all over your movement. But I'm imagining that you're doing, it's almost like the, you're doing the thing back into the bushes, but your head is still peeking out so you can see things. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. So you try to get behind a crate that's stacked and you just are too interested in your thing keeps hopping out. Also, you are still wearing your massive pack that is not doing you any services. Yeah, so I'm trying to back into the crates and I'm bumping into everything as I'm doing it.

And I'm just like, damn, shut up! Yeah, and I'm like scooting myself into. into and I'm just standing still probably now in front. And some things are tipping off and crashing as well. Is that your turn? That is a bonus action. I mean that's a bonus action. I'm going to, I'm magical tinkering.

I've got to use everything I have. Of course. Right? Because I feel like I'm in a bad spot. There's a gun in front of me. I'm going to cast magical tinkering. Magical tinkering, I can imbue a tiny non-magical object with a magical property of my choice. Up to five feet of radius and light,

six second long recorded message or emits an odor or nonverbal sound. So what I wanna do is cast magical tinkering on my crossbow so that it smells of gunpowder. It smells of gunpowder and smoke, but like a heavy scent of gunpowder, and I want it to look like it's smoking. Oh, awesome.

And as I'm realizing that they can totally awkwardly see me and I'm backing into nothing, not hidden at all, I quickly dive into my crossbow, do my little magical tinkering, and I want to whip my crossbow towards them and go, I'll blow us all up. I'll blow us all up. Okay, okay.

I'll have any closer, I'll blow it all up. I love that. I wish you to roll an intimidation. Okay. With the minus two charisma, a nata two. Oh, no, that's a one. But a dirty one? A dirty one.

A dirty one. What is going on? Oh my God, Tiffany. Okay. So they clock you and they're looking at you. Only the dwarf has a gun and the halfling does not have a gun. That halfling, you can't tell what he's wielding yet. And so you are threatening them with a smoking, a smoking crossbow.

And you can see them furrowing their brows and getting ready and they say, you're too bad, we're on crindles bill, aren't we? Great, great turn, Henry. You got it. Hope that was helpful. Well, you would be sure to check off the magical tinkering for this and magical tinkering, because it's in the same day for the finger that you made.

I only have one left. You got one left. Okay, perfect. Okay, actually, so it is the guy, it is the gun's turn. It's the gun. He's so, this guy just calls himself the gun. It's the only person in the world that has one.

Okay, so actually he's not going to attack Tippy, not a threat, but his boss is yellow. bloody murder over the skull. So he's gonna shoot his pistol. The dwarf is gonna do the math, see that the skull is in alliance with the body that is a little bit closer and is going to shoot the body of Bizzy. So let's see, does a 16 hit?

A 16 hit. His 16 hits, okay. This is going to do three points of piercing damage. Ooh. Okay, three points of piercing damage and then the halfling comes up. Yeah, does not see Tippy as a threat, There.

This is working out. Leave this sad child alone. He goes, don't worry, friend, we got you. And he like, go, and he transforms into a rat humanoid with big long teeth and eyebrows and just hair everywhere, claws that come out. It's not dressed in the same clothes anymore. It looks horrendous, and it actually is still

around the same size, so still pretty short, but taller than you, Tippy. And he runs towards the closest creature, which actually is Tippy. So that is his action though. Let's see if he's got a bonus action. That is his action and he just kind of comes up to you and it looks like he's about to attack you.

Don't let him grab your hair. Blu-ZOL-up, blah-blos-l-l-l-l-up. Yeah. Busy. So busy has just been shot. She's still biting. Still biting. Okay, I'm gonna make you a strength saving.

To make sure that you can still hold on to his shoulder. Strength? Mm-hmm. And you had already done eight points of damage. Yeah. Matt 20. Damn. Plus one for strength, so to what.

Okay, you're still holding on, which that will do another, just automatically six points of piercing damage to Crandall's shoulder. Pass. Suck it. But that is not your turn. That was just more like a concentration spell. What would you like to do? I'm gonna see if I can cast Unseen Servant again and get my girl back.

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Let's get that gun. Okay, so she's gonna go for the dwarf scum, as you called him, and she's going to try to touch him. Let's see. Yeah, yep, yep. That secret. Oh, there we go. That's my girl.

Renee! That's my girl! That ghost has a gun. It's a ghost of a gun. So jealous. Okay, so you see, Ronnie, she had tried to make Crandall slip, I think, before, with some of her ectoplasm.

That didn't work, but she's back. She's like, gotcha, girl! And she comes back over to the dwarf who's just shot his gun at you and just kind of comes at him and like head butts him, but holds on. And the dwarf goes, ah! As the ghost just like hold on to him. And he takes 15 necrotic damage,

and you can see that there's veins and stuff. Now she did hit, and every time she hits, Roll a D6. On a six, she can stay, but on a five or lower, she does get brought back to Luzon. Okay, so it's a four. It's a four. Okay, so she does it, she goes, okay, that's a lot. That's a lot for me to handle.

I gotta go, ooh! And she just disappeared. And you see Busy's body, because Busy as she was tormenting Gundwarf, busy's body is just in the back, or her head is so chompy, just making like the, the DX. Second job.

So just a headless, skullless. skeleton doing suck and chops. And then as Roddy leaves, you see just the head, or just the skeleton wave goodbye. Okay, awesome. Yeah, you can tell this dwarf is just awful, like hanging on by a thread. God.

Phibs, your turn. Okay, so what does fibs see about this? Like, how much of this situation has he clocked? You've definitely seen that the half-ling and the dwarf show up. Okay. I don't know how much of busies and Tippy's actions you've seen. Sure.

But you were able to see the insignias. You are able to tell that they're under Crandall's supervision. Do I recognize the insignia? Ooh. Ooh. Interesting. Roll a history check.

All right. Let's see. That's a 15. A 15. Yeah. I've read a book. You have read a book. Yeah, you are well informed.

You know, you do recognize this. It represents six Sundari. Gotcha. And you actually have no idea how you know this. This is not something from the past five years of your, you just know it. Interesting. It's as we say, from the bone four times.

In your bones. Yeah. Amazing. Yes, the bone four times. So yeah, that's what you notice. Huh. Weird. Okay.

So I've got Crandall in a grapple and Phibbs is gonna talk to Crandall. You're like, call off your goons right now, we gotta talk. Call him off. Oh no, I hate this. Okay, so you do have him in a compromising situation, but he does have goons, so go ahead and roll an intimidation check. Yeah. Are you doing anything else?

Are you doing anything else to, I guess, improve this intimidation? No, because that's gonna be my fallback plan. Got it, got it, got it. Okay, so that is a 14. I don't want to, but, I don't want to. Like I, there's gone out of hands so quickly. Oh, Phim's, it's just me, it's just little bit of me.

And the guys go, you know him. No, well, yeah, sort of, okay, stand down. He goes, and they, and they go, well, when it comes to the Fiends Union, we don't stand down for nothing. We're done with the Fiends Union. And Kranty goes, but I'm helping you, remember, I'm helping you and I'm telling you that these, these are, um, trustworthy or they're fine, I guess. And he has called them off. Let's see if they get called.

If they comply. Yeah. The halfling is almost like crazed right now in its wear rat form, like, so it doesn't look like it's gonna slow down anytime soon. The dwarf himself spits. He goes, oh, Crandor, this is bigger than you. This is bigger than all of us.

We're going to bring the Fiends Union down in all of its means. We're not to change again. We're not the union. And so that's what happens. So I'm gonna say to Crandall, looks like we're only hope old Granny boy, so you're gonna help us, or they're gonna get you.

I'm on your side now, am I? You've been drafted into the skeleton war. Right, right. And I mean like I was before, in Zoucelaire, we were all on the same team, Terra. But, oh, yes, I suppose I am. They're not following me. Don't hurt me.

Phibs is not letting go of Crandall. Okay. And he's positioning Crandall towards them and using Crandall as a human shield. Okay. Okay. It's just going to be like, back off. I'm only going to want you once. Okay.

And that's Fibbs's turn. That is Fibb's turn. Okay, perfect. Tippy. Okay, so Tippy, the wearerat is in front of Tippy right now. Yeah. And Tippy's like, oh, God. And Tippy's going to make himself as small as possible.

and use nimble escape again to disengage as a bonus action. Okay. And slide between the wear rat's legs. I knew that sweat would pay off. Okay. Yeah, like I want to like kind of like, it's going down to slide, and just he's gonna kick his feet out

and just slide like a bullet in between his legs. Yes, you are able to just do that and disengage. Yeah, you don't get an opportunity attack. How close am I to dwarf with a gun? A dwarf of the gun. I would say in this turn you can get close It's just a canonical name now. Yeah, gun, Dweb.

I am going to run my max speed, so 30 feet towards Dorf with a gun, and whether I get there, am I there? Yeah, you're there. Yeah, for sure, you're there. I'm within gun grabbing distance, I guess. Absolutely. Tippy sees the gun up close for the first time, and Tippy realizes it's the most beautiful thing he's ever seen. The design of it, the look, the sheen of the metal, it's the engineering. You could see his eyes sort of glazing.

over like a, oh, sort of like moment. And then he goes, I want that gun! And I lunge to try to take the gun out of the dwarf's hand. Okay, perfect. Okay, so that'll be a grapple check. And you have to use strength, so acrobatics, and I'll be using whatever I want to use. Acrobatics or- All right.

Oh, sorry, you don't use acrobatics. You actually use athletics. Did I say that? You said acrobatics? You have to use. You have to use strength. You have to use athletics. You have to use athletics.

Yeah, you have to use athletics. And then I can use acrobatics or not. I'm gonna roll again. Okay, okay. Okay, I got a 12. I got a 13. Hey! Yes!

Okay, so you got your hand on the gun. I imagine this just because it's gonna be tough for him to shoot. It's still possible. He still got it. You haven't wrenched it. I didn't even think about that. You have held onto the gun. So I imagine he's like, yeah, yeah, yeah. And he's like, yeah, yeah, you're dangling from it.

Oh, my God. That is great, though. Yeah, you've got his weapon in hand. It actually is his turn. And he says, "'Ave since you fangs you knowledge "'it came to knack, Brecker, everything's been worse.' And he tries to shake you off.

So he's gonna try to get out of the grapple. This is gonna be another athletics versus athletics. Okay, let's do. 21. I mean, in-hon, I believe. That's gonna be a three. Okay, okay. He is able to shake you off a little

so you do release the grapple. That might just be his action, unfortunately. Love the image of you dangling from the barrel of this pistol. Yeah, okay, so he and his gun have escaped the grapple, but that is his action. So I don't think he can do much of anything else. Yeah, so he goes, ah, I've had enough of you.

Crandall, you are you alloying with these fains? And kind of goes, oh, just a little bit. Just a little bit as a treat. Just a little bit for me. Okay, that's his turn. Okay, Halfling's turn. Halfling is going to run up in its rat form. Oh no.

Yeah, it really hates that you ran away from it. So, or ran between its legs, really. It's gonna run up to you and it will attack. It's going to bite you and swipe at you with its short sword. Of course, of course. Okay, so let's see if it hits. Does an 18 hit? Yes.

Okay? Don't be tippy doesn't have 19 AC. Oh no, okay, so that hits and then does a 10 hit. 10 does not hit. 10 does not hit, okay, so he comes up, he bites you. It's going to do not that much damage actually, only three piercing damage. As he comes up, you just drop down from the gun

and he runs up and he just, he bites your arm that's still a raise and he just takes a chunk out of it. You need to succeed on a DC-11 Constitution saying through. Oh, like a poison again? Or what do you think? DC 11. DC 11. On what constitution?

Constitution. Okay, thank God. Yeah, it's not poison, but what do you think might this be? This is gonna be a 21. A 21. You almost got rabies. Oh my God, Tippy with rabies. Weird a version to water.

What you experience is as he bites, you actually start glimpsing where rat, like, and throppy. Oh, oh, oh my God. Oh my God, no. That was close. I don't want that at all. It's bad enough. Could you imagine wear rat tippy?

Rattat tippy. I can picture it. Ratat tippy. I kind of want this for us. Let him bite you again. So you resist the urge. You like blink and all of a sudden you like see the entire world above you. You sniff cheese and nuts and you're you want it so bad.

But you fight it off. You fight it off and your blood is back to tippy. Who only wants a gun and you're fine. Cheese, gun. No. Cheese, gun. Yes. Okay, busy, your turn.

So how far is my headless frame from where two is? You're about 30 feet, yeah. About 30 feet. Okay, then I'm going to. Make a strength, save me through, are you still biting crayon? You did hear everything that Phibs was talking to him about. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You're still biting craddle.

Okay, so strength. Four. Four. A four. A four? Okay, yeah, you're biting, but like without the support of a body, the head falls off of the shoulder, and you're just clacking. clattering on the ground.

Those like wind-up teeth. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're like going in a circle as your teeth are trying to grab onto any purchase. But my body is still like... It is, yes. I'm done doing cross chops. So I'm gonna have my body dash over to where Tippy is.

And you know what? I am just going to knee that dwarf in the crotch. Perfect. Yeah, awesome. So this is gonna be an on our own strike. roll, yes. And that was a 10. A 10 is not hit. But it's so soft down there.

Yeah, that doesn't quite hit. This is a beefy dwarf. Like you're, and he's obviously trained in some sort of martial way. So you come at him with your knee to the groin, but boy, does he see that coming from a mile off and he's able to dodge. Anything else?

When's the last time I inspired someone bardically? So yeah, as my bonus, Bartik inspiration to Tippy. So teeth still chattering, going in a circle. Okay. Skeleton just constantly trying to kick and hit and it's not connecting and just like,

Tippy, you got this. Remember, guns are cool and it's never bad to own one. You're right, guns are cool. Nothing can go bad about this. Get that gun. I'm gonna get that gun. You go get that gun. And cheese, gun.

Okay, awesome. So you're now bardically inspires out a D6 for him, an extra D6. Yeah, he gets a, a G20. Yeah, yeah, he gets an extra series. Okay. God, I need it. I'm worried about our party's politics,

but... All right, we're pro-gun anti-union. We, I mean, we did... You know what? We should also stop funding schools. We just escaped an evil layer. We've still got some culture to shake out. We've got some deep programming.

Right, right. Oh boy. Okay, so Phibbs is... All right, walk. And he's moving slow. with Crandall as the human shield towards the dwarf and the Hware Rat. And he reaches out and point at them

and says, I'm giving you one last chance in case I didn't make myself clear. I know what that symbol is. And I know that you're after people that we're not allied with. We ain't parts of Fiends United, so why don't you drop it? Tell that to your fingerless hand. I'm a skeleton, I'm an all-state.

of disrepair. Wait, so you're saying you're not with the Fiends Union? No, we want answers, and they got them. Oh right, what does this insignia mean, then, Smarty Skeleton? Those six dots represent six of the Sundari. That's right. Ah. Crandall, oh, yes, oh.

It's quite believe, I would believe them if they're not part of the Fiends Union. In fact, it's very surprising they're alive at all. We're all full of surprises today, Cranny Boy. Right, right. And the dwarf points. Actually, go ahead and roll an intimidation check. The dwarf doesn't seem to swayable. That's a natural one.

Oh, damn it. The most natural of one. Yeah. Okay, and he says, you know, Crandall, we need you, but we may not need you this bad to take orders from silly little fiends union swine. Do you say anything else, Dan? Where are busy and tippy relative to these people?

Are they in active combat? So next to the dwarf is both busy and- Are they in the middle or they're on the outside? They're on the outside. They're flanking him. How far away am I? At this point you've walked up, so yeah, you're maybe 10 feet away.

10 feet. Mm-mm. So with a cone, just curious how this works. Okay. I would like to, if possible, you just may the biggest mistake of your short life. And you see a little ember start sparking from the tip of Phibs's finger.

Okay. And he pushes Crandall away and smacks them together and casts burning hands. Oh my gosh. I wanna set off this guy's gunpowder. Oh, man, yeah, great. Oh, okay. But I don't wanna hit my friends,

so that's why I'm a little worried. You will for sure, because burning hands hit him. Burning Hands hits friends. Burning hands is friendly fire. It hits friends, but it's a 15 foot cone. That's why I'm asking if they're on the outside. Where's the cone?

Okay, so everyone's very packed together. If you only wanted to hit the dwarf, I would allow that, but if you also wanted to get the wear rat, you would definitely get Tippy too. Okay. Then I'll just go with the dwarf because I don't want to risk. I would calculate and I don't want to hit Tippy. I'm talking to the dwarf, he's being a .

So you just made the biggest mistake, you assure, little life. Your fire comes straight from your fingers. It goes directly into the gun's eye. And you can see it like, you know, zoom in and it goes, turn to crackle, crackle, crackle right into the gunpowder barrel. Also, I mean, Burning Hands does just fly up into his face too. So roll damage first.

Roll damage for burning hands. If he makes a spell save DC of, I believe, 13, he takes half damage. Okay, let's see if he does. Deck save, you said? Deck save, yeah. He got A9. He doesn't save for shit.

Eh. Good. Okay, and that is 10 points of fire damage. Wow. Not to mention. If there's any flammable objects in the area, they might be ignited as well at your discretion. Give me one second, because that definitely happens.

Oh no. I knew I shouldn't have oiled my jerkin this morning. Who knew that guns would be dangerous? Okay, I really thought it would just be safe and cool. Chill. Y'all two and my Warrat make a dexterity saving throw. Okay, okay, okay. Actually, you do too, Dan.

Okay, okay. Not bad. 18. 18, it's gonna be a DC 12? Nope. Okay, the- Warrat saves and you don't save, okay? So everyone, oops. Did I just detonate?

You take 13 points of fire damage. Oh my God. And everyone else takes half of that, so six points. Okay, so that would normally wipe me but I'm gonna go into a bone pile, which means instead of being hit to zero, I'm gonna drop to one hit point.

I'm just a little pile of bones, but I'm prone and basically it says I'm considered to be under similar effect to the feign death spell. I can't move, I can't take action until the effect ends. But yeah, so I right now am a little pile of bones. I imagine that Busy's hair has probably, like before she drops into a bone pile,

has probably caught a little bit on fire, not unlike a certain pop star's, certain beverage commercial. So maybe just like a little bit of flash of like the hair, and then she gets a chance to kind of like pat some of that down, beat it, and then collapses into a bone pile. So you're down with one hit point? I have one hit point.

And we have Walrock Homebrew Race of Awakened Undead to think for that. Thank you. Thank you. cartooning mechanics. So amazing. So you're still up. The rest of you took six damage. So let me paint you a picture of what happens to Tippy. So as he looks over and he sees his friend Fibb goes, you've made the worst mistake of your life. Tipi,

Tipi not understanding that magic is about to happen. Goes for the gun again because of the gun. because Busy was just like guns are cool, guns are chill, right? And I go, busy's right. I should go over that gun. It's mine. And then I launch my little goblin body at the gun, but as this is happening, I see the fire,

just a wall of fire hit the gun, and as I'm going for it explodes in my face and I'm down at negative two and I'm begging death saves. Oh no. Okay, I'm unconscious. A huge mistake. TIPPi. You live is really cool though.

It looked badass. I was speaking in the second, in the second case, this was the worst mistake of my life. Tippi is unconscious and on the ground. Okay, what does Fibbs look like? Fibbs thinks he's doing like the coolest thing he's ever done. He's just like, I'm gonna save my friends. And he sees the flame shoot out of his fingertips

and he doesn't quite understand what gun are how they work. So as the flame erupts and goes down the barrel of the gun, he is confused and then his jaw like starts to drop a little bit as he sees the resultant explosion that occurs and just fiery chaos. His hat is on fire, he's just like, oh God, oh, Tippy, oh no, I'm so, this wasn't supposed to happen like this.

He's just so worried, starts to run over to Tippy. Perfect. Like forgetting about Crandall entirely. The dwarf completely goes down. The Wair rat is still up. So the explosion did a ton of damage. Crandall's actually still alive as well. You pushed him to the side and he's still alive.

Which brings us to Crandall's turn and he says, Well, Feebs, nothing's right. And the Wair rat even looks a little confused as he is singed. Crandall starts to run away. And then he goes back and goes, but I need the mocked. I need you, I need the mocked, I can't, oh, what do I do?

And he's just kind of running back and forth. He's not fighting at all, but you can tell he's completely out of his mind. That's what Crandall does. Tippy, death saving throw. Okay, Tipy's first death save. Let's see what happens. Come on, tips.

Okay, 18. Go big tips. One, success. Two bone. Dwarfes. is dead, the wear rat's turn. The wear rat takes an action to change back into his normal form. He's a halfling again wearing the canvas suit that you saw him in earlier. He goes up to Crandall and he goes, Crandall, this has gotten out of hand. Who are these people? How do you

know them? Or need to know. And Crandom goes, oh, they're from my last dungeon. And he goes, Eun-sook. They're from Eun-sook. And he goes, well, yes, I mean, they're not as important as I was, but yes, I manage them and he goes then why Crandall have you been telling us how friendly you were to all of these fiends and how good you were with all of the minions that you supervised and how much they looked up to you and how friendly they were when here they are trying to ruin you and Cranda goes well they might they might have there was the auction and he's just mumbling and the guy the little halfling swipes his hair back and he goes, we're not going to get the Fiends united like this. We're not going to get it.

We're not going to get him if this is all we can come down to. Crandall, what have you? And he just eyes you. You're the one who's still alive. And he goes, I need to know for once and for all. Are you part of the Fiends Union? I swear on Unzook. We are not. What's the beef with Crandall P. Greco Wirth. I gotta heal my friend because that's a long story. Okay, okay. The war is over and both sides lost.

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wherever you get your podcasts. And the chaotic on the case. So the wearerat backs it down a little bit. He's going to stabilize his friend, the dwarf. And he says, we're stopping right now. We're going to have a conversation. Crennall said that any of the minions in Eunzu's lair, there was nothing to worry about for many of you.

And I don't know what you've been up to, but that was some powerful magic. Oh, thank you. Yeah, so nice. And we are out of combat as this halfling has kind of taken charge. You haven't gotten his name yet, but he does stabilize his dwarf friend. You can see him providing him a potion of healing as well. Okay, I'm gonna do the same with Tippy. I have one more potion of healing.

Okay, what is the healing on that? 2D4 plus 2. 2D4 plus 2. He just opens Tippy's mouth and just pours all of it in at once because he doesn't know how much... It doesn't really know how to drink, clearly. I heal for 8. So just...

Buh! Oh, getting water bordered by a potion of healing. Crandall's kind of made himself scarce a little bit. He's kind of hiding just to see how things will play out. Bidz, you are alive and awake and conscious. Yeah, I'm awake. I'm just still a pile of bones, so I just like turn upies. Oh, yeah, yeah.

One sec, and I- I-me-up. Once I see that Tippy's waking up, Phibbs walks over to help reconstruct Busy. The leg bones connect. See, he's humming that to himself under his breath to remember what bones go. The tail bones connect. Okay, hey, because you're doing this, go ahead and make a, we'll call it a medicine check. Just a straight one, no advantage or disadvantage. That's a 16.

A 16, yeah, okay. Yeah, everything gets put back together just fine. Ah, okay. So I could have been a bonologist. So I can, like, stand and do stuff, but I'm still at one hit point, is that we're at? Yes, yes. So while my friends are reassembling themselves, Tippy is super disorienting and goes,

The gun, did we get the gun? Where is the gun? And I'm like looking around on the floor for the gun still. Okay, yeah, you do not find the gun, you find some bits of scrap metal, you find little bits of food. Cheese?

Yeah, you find a little bit of cheese. Just some street cheese. Just, yeah, it's a poor cheese. Who wasn't eating floor cheese? God. Oh, is that hot sauce? Okay, so Timmy's like eating garbage in the corner. It's like a compulsion though.

He's not enjoying himself. I mean, it's not un-goblin. Yeah, yeah. It's just like he's so stressed out. He has to eat something. Absolutely, yeah. You're gonna put anything in your mouth at this point. But the other two get up and you can see that the halflings, like holding the dwarf back a little bit.

The dwarf goes, I'm just so embarrassed. Like, I didn't see that coming at all. But I just couldn't let them just take a little. entire plan against the Fiends United and just shove it down the throat and the wearer goes yeah right I know but then no they say they are and neither is Crandall they have the same voice they're twins you notice now so the halfling is gonna do you can tell he's got the the dwarf the dwarf kind of sits down with his head and his hands just like still a little bit fired up ready to go but but holding himself together and the halfling approaches

kind of side-eyes the goblin on his hands and knees and just looks at you, Phibs, and goes, all right, I'll be honest, I'll be honest. I'm just going to do cards on the table here because we hired Crennell. We let him help us infiltrate Fiends United and he's been nothing. Crendle, it's true, right? You haven't done a damn thing, right? All we needed you was the case of join. Find us away into the damn building.

You couldn't even do that for two weeks. So? Oh, so you're trying to infiltrate Fiends United. We're trying to do the same thing. Okay. Sorry. But what reason could you possibly have? Oh, they stole our house.

We got kicked out of our dungeon. We were happy working for Unzug. Then one day, he's gallantlings. They killed everybody, which weird. And much to my surprise, a new group came in saying that it was a union taking over our dungeon and because we were not members of the union, we had to leave our hearth and home.

That led us here to NACBRECA, where we quickly learned all of the NECBRECA rules. NECBECBECRAC rules. Thank you. I don't do that. Oh, wow. Real iconoclast. It's like a wear-at thing?

No, that's a longer story. Yeah, what rules do you go by then? We go by the rules of the what? Rules of the what? Marks. The marked? Rules of the marked. No, we don't have to know.

It's not rules like that. Oh. Do you have a different hands? Okay. No, we don't have a different. No. A little wave. Rules of the bar.

No, no, no. We're to, um, we're to a press for that. We don't have time for silly hand signals. It's okay. You'll figure out what your hand signals are later. Yeah, that's why I'm missing a digit. We gave it to the Fiend United Recruiter because we got to get some answers, and the best way we figured was, uh, from the inside out.

You have an invitation to get in. Yeah, we're going tomorrow. We gave them our fingers. No, you did it. Well, they gave them our fingers. They gave them their fingers. You still have a five, are you? Okay, so that's a whole story.

All right. Yeah, how long do you got? No, no, it's fine, it's fine. But for real, you have a way in? Yeah. Theoretically. All right, Crennald has been working with us for two weeks, three weeks,

trying to get into this manner where they're staying, the west end of town. And what do you want from them again? I don't understand. Well. There's time for that. We do want something. Oh, we want something from them.

Is it cheese? Not to be rude, but you are aware of rat. Wow. Were you in there for cheese? You're going in there for cheese? I don't think. I don't think so. It's not a weird question.

We're just gonna side-b- Sorry, sorry. Did I say something out of pocket? Well, I don't know if it's appropriate to ask the person that turns into a rat if cheese, it's an affliction. It's crazy because when it bit me, well, when they bit me, Like, I had like this hunkering for cheese, and I feel like it's still kind of here.

You were like, hankering for a hunk of cheese? I was hankering for a hunk of cheese. So I was wondering of, like, maybe that's their culture? Like, they love cheese, and I was trying to, like, you know, get in their head and be more personable. Oh, okay, so like a cultural. Yeah, like exchange. Okay, you're extending an olive branch,

but instead of olives, cheese. It's a cheese branch. You're extending a cheese plate. Yes, a cheese plate. Let's say that officially. Sir, we're extending a cheese plate to you. officially. Okay. I don't know what to do about information. Is that a metaphor? We want to also get into the Fiends Union and get that cheese as well if you catch our cheese. Go on for the cheddar.

Cheddar. Right. Yeah. So actually that is quite offensive. Oh my God. I'm so sorry. You know what I knew? We had a sidebar and everything. I knew it as soon as it left my mouth. I'm so sorry. We took it we took a gamble. It didn't pay off. So yeah, the thing is I didn't. ask to be turned into a wear rat. And neither did I, a second ago, when you try to flip me, you know, that was kind of weird. What did you ask to be turned into? Oh, nothing.

I was just going about my life. So, my name's Dapper. Dapper. Dapper. Dapper. Dapper. Dapper. Dapper. And that's Chabba and Chab.

Dab. And Chab. And Chab. And Chab. Bizzy takes out her clipboard. Dipper. And Chad. So I guess we have two questions.

One are you trying to break into the Fiends United and where can I find more guns? I mean, as the marks, we do have an arsenal. I don't know we've got any on hand, but maybe Pekara has one. You'd like her. She's also a goblin. She's a goblin?

Yeah, she turns into a mammoth. A what? A marmot. What is that? It's basically like a chubby squirrel. Chubby squirrel. Wow. I didn't know they made them in different sizes.

A squirrel with a gun? Specifically chubby with a gun? That's not a chubby squirrel with a... It's kind of like me, guys. Oh, we got... You both store food in your cheeks for use later in the winter season. Maybe I'm one of them.

Try to turn right now. Tibby holds his breath. I've both got a big tail. Tippy turns red. Yeah. No, no, it's way easier than that. Actually, yeah, you just, it just happens, you know, at this point. So I don't think you're aware of mama. Is it a moon thing for you too, or is that just for the wolves? At this point, it's a choice, but, um... Okay. Yeah, there is a trigger for different, for different beasts. And when you get in there with all of your guns and all of your cheese, sorry, what do you want to happen in the Fiends United? Right, right, right. Yeah, what we want. Look, the way you describe them coming in and

taking over your own. That's kind of what they've been doing all over Sundaros. We've got our suspicions, but they are wide-reaching and fast. They've only been around like eight years or something, and the way they've grown is truly, truly magnanimous and insane. And they're led by a human. Right. A human-leading... Her name's Kaya. I do know that. Oh, yeah, we... I remember here about Kaya. Yeah. We've just been thinking, putting our little craniums together. It's weird that the Galletlings show up and then all of a sudden, what, like two seconds later.

It was pretty quick. People come to your home. We've got beef with them too, and we know a certain group of gallantlings called the Yester Dustris were actually hired by the Fiends Union. We were hired by something evil. And the whole thing that they've been up to is just overtaking all these towns, all of these layers. Then we know they're looking.

They're just snapping up property? It's not just property. What they're looking for is the five articles of the Sindari Champions. Five articles of the Sundari champions. We have one of them. They tried to get the chalice from us. We've got it, but they got the decoy instead. Wait, you said chalice, not circlet, right? One of those five articles is a circlet. And they have the circlet? That's what they took from Unzug. That's right, the circlet. Yep. Was there a real or was it a decoy? It was in Unzug. It was probably real. It was all right. Yeah, it probably was real. Yeah, it probably was real. And

Crandall goes, I have it on good authority, it was real. Oh, Crandall. How are you still alive? Eun-Zing sent me on a special errand. He gave me a heads up before he was going to leave, basically. So he's off doing something, but I have to do something first. So he's not dead? Oh, are you kidding?

The entire world would end if Unzum died. Oh, thank gosh. So do you know where he is? I have a meeting place arranged, but like I would tell the likes of you. You have a meeting place arranged with Unzouk? Correct. Can I roll in sight?

You all can roll in sight. That's a 20, dirty 20. 30, 20. That's a four. Hey, he has a meeting arranged with Unzug. He has a meeting place arranged with Unzug. You can tell that Crandall's saying things that he believes are true.

He's also very serious. He knows that he might be being had by Eun-Zug. But he does believe, and he has, like, he believes that it's true. He has a meeting place, that he believes that's true. The other part of it that he's just scared is that he knows that Unzook's tricksy. So you have a meeting place, him.

I guess Unzug wouldn't mind of his fellow worshippers and minions. His loyal servants. Loyal servants showed up with you, right? He'd be very happy, especially with all the intel that we have and that we're going to collect. once we've gone into Feeney United. So you wouldn't mind us accompanying you to your meeting spot?

Well, the thing is I can't show up empty-handed. So as long as you would go on the entire journey with me, then I don't see a problem. That's a lot of time with Krindol. Like hang out with you all day. Well, either that or you will never know where the meeting place is. And the wearer goes, listen, we've had the same deal

with him, to be honest. He's got something up there and he's not sharing, and we also gonna wanna use it. If I'm understanding this correctly, you don't want to show up to Unzug without at least one or more articles of the Sundari champion, is that correct? Would I be accurate in summarizing this interaction?

Yes, well, we've all seen his staff. Yes. That's one of them. Super cool. That's why I modeled my staff after. And I realize I don't have it and I just look around for it because I threw it. Oh, it looks like your staff. Okay.

Right. No, it looks much cooler. You have seen it, and it does. There's a python on the end of it. Oh, yeah. Oh, that's that. You got the sense, especially you as an artificer, you as a wizard, it's extremely, extremely magical.

Same as the circlet. What is odd to you very clearly is, like, why would he keep the staff button leave the circlet, or let the circlet be stolen? And Crendel says, yes, I'm to return to him with it. least one of the remaining articles. And why haven't you succeeded yet? Because everyone's looking for them.

They're everywhere, they're nowhere, they've been moved, they've been sought after, they've been dug up. All I know for sure is that Unzu still has the stuff, which again I'm just assuming, and it sounds as though these gallantlings have the circlet. And they, where it goes, and we've got the chalice, that the yesterthust has just tried to steal, but they got the decoy, so we've still got our thing.

All right. Now, what we want from the Fiends United, they're not who they say they are, first of all. We also know they've got so much money down in a safe down there. So what we want is the safe, because within that, they've got letters or anything that ties them to who they're getting money from. And also where they're going, because I think we're running out of time. They're packing up soon, and they're going to leave town.

I'm sure we could follow them, but without the safe, we wouldn't be having a plan. and the market is already as strapped as we can be. So you're asking us to help perpetuate the heist of the century, stealing union dues from beneath the vault of Fiends United. Fiends United headquarters. So we have, let's see, we got, one, two, three, four, five, six.

Oh, you should know something about Crandall. Should I? I know a lot about Crandall. Okay, well. Not a fan. Okay, also no, a fan. Oh no, I said that loud enough for Cradleley. He is. Yes.

Not a fan that's so funny. And the way that goes, honestly, every time he's been around, our luck has gotten worse. He's not additive, is what I'm trying to say. I don't know. He made a pretty good shield. Well, Cradle, I think you've been made redundant. And he goes, no, no, I haven't. Remember, we all wanted to know where Eun-Zook was going.

and I have specific information that you can't get without him. I believe him, because I rolled very low. I believe him wholeheartedly. Yeah, you do. And also, I mean, yeah, even with that insight, he does believe that he's got some ties to Eun-ZUg. I mean, you also know that that's kind of true.

Like, if he got a heads up that Unzug was going to leave and the Fiends United came in killed everyone, but Unzug's safe Crandall. Like, there's a lot that matches up, at least, on some level. So we're doing a heist. The Moch is doing a hoist? And if you have a way in, that would just help us. So we're doing a height.

So we're doing our life. All right, all right. Bonson's 11. If we can get five more people plus Cranble. All right, I guess we would love to have you, especially if you can get in. But the spoils must go to the mark. We have airships that need, I mean,

this is the only way we're surviving, is living up in the city. Do you have airship? You have airship? We actually have an airship at all disposal for this heist? Can we borrow it? Can we ride in it?

Eventually, yes, but just so you know, it's hidden on the other side of the Scravix outside of town that acts like a wall, just so no one knows about it. There's a whole thing going on up there in Wretched Cove. The yesterday does just screwed everything up, but we can't get access to our energy sales for the airships, and we can't get access to our extra parts

because they're all in the same junkyard place. So everything's messed up. We've got to fix that, but until then, we're down here on one and there's only one more of us, and her name's Pecara, and she's a goblin where-marmint. Okay, wow, you just mentioned like six different quests, but... Sorry, there's a lot going on.

All right. So, yes, first of all, we gotta get this safe. But the whole thing is we can't just go back and forth to Wretched Cove. Okay, so we gotta get the safe, Botion 7, and then we get to ride an airship. That's all I heard. And the trade lines suck right now. That's the long and the short of it. But most of what I heard, was we go in, do the coolest thing

that anyone has ever done. Heist of the century. And then- Reward us for that. We get to ride in an airship and be the coolest people that ever lived. Right, you'd be doing us a solid for sure. You'd have the marked at your backs as well.

No, at your backs, on your backs. No, you'd have the marks. On my back. You'd have the marked behind you. I have a spider that lives in my head. Really? Yeah. I open my jaw.

All right. Hello. It's me, Lou. So nice to meet you. Oh, God, that is terrifying. I know, isn't she the best? Yeah, she's my niece. Yeah, terrifying.

She kind of picks up her legs, and again, two of them are a little busted, and she goes, yeah. Act scared. Oh, wow. Good job, Lou. No. So scary.

No. Oh. Now this is all said we should go to a place where we can discuss how this is gonna work, Because really, we've been stuck on step one, getting into Feens United. Crandall said he knew everything about minions and fiends, and he could get us in, no problem. And for all I know, he's been just running back and forth,

and that break of getting drunk. That does sound like Crandall and something he would do. Well, let's drag Crandall along, and why don't we go to your hideout and discuss the rest of the details? And maybe take, like, a long rest. Maybe find a nice little goblin hole. Fall asleep in it and then wake up and feel better. Yeah, you probably also need some of that stuff.

So this is getting on into evening. If you remember, you also had an appointment at the Fiends Union tomorrow morning. Yeah, right. And they're very clear that it seems as though the Fiends Union headquarters are going to pack up and leave within 24 hours by the end of maybe tomorrow night. So the Havling and the Dwarf agreed to take you to where they're setting up shop. Yeah, let's go to where Pekara's hiding out. We can show you what we've got. If you've got literally any ideas, we would thank you so much.

Most of us in the market are from the beyond and just got bitten. So we don't know much about the inner workings of minions. We've not really been welcomed into Mnachracker unless we're in our monster form. So it's really touchy. But you know how organizing a bunch of weird monsters. or just monsters all fit together. Oh, we're pretty weird. We're really.

Just objectively. Yeah. Well, they've got some weird, weird ones in there too. So, yeah, it's an evening time you're able to get out of this alleyway, head to where Pekara is set up. She's actually in a camp outside of town, and just to set the stage. So Nacbrek is in the western part of the desolation, and on the west side is the Scravix, all set up like a wall against the wall.

the wilds that are close to the other side. The camps form all around Nacbreka, and she is on the western side of Nacbreka before the Scravix, and they also told you their airship is behind the Scravix. So she's got this kind of muslin tent set up. There's no firelight coming from it, but as you approach, you see she like pokes her head out,

then she pulls out a gun and like points in it, the three of you, and Dapper goes, It's all right, it's all right. They were with us. Careful, those things explode. I, uh, I like how you've tied your gobbie knobs. They look great. Oh, proud of them, thanks.

Uh, yeah. You know, gobby knops. I love gobbin naps, I mean... They're my favorite knob! They're my favorite knob! Oh my god! It's so nice and refreshing to meet another goblin out here because, I mean, love you both. We love you too.

Yeah, we get it. Yeah, it's just, it's been a long time. I know, well, look, the only reason the golden would be out by themselves is that they got kicked out of their family. Right, so. Right. So yeah, there's not many of us,

because most of us don't get kicked out. Right. Well, what tribe were you from, and how did you end up in Neckbreka? Neck Breca rules. Neck Breaka rules. Oh, I don't do that. Oh, okay.

All right, oh, sorry. Sorry, that's right. Keep forgetting. The marked? The mark. We don't have hand symbols, but maybe we could have one. That's cute. So that thing in your hand, where'd you get it?

It's a gun. Look, up there in the sky in Wretched Cove, the main thing we do is collect metallic things, like broken down war forged or little machines. So cool. And so that's what we build our weapons out of. I'm a bit of a tinkerer, I'd say. So am I. I mean, look at all my stuff.

I mean, I have all sorts of things. You take your pack and just like, yeah, yeah. And it's just like bolts and like, yeah, clink, clink, clink, it's like all these scraps of metal and stuff. And I can even do this. And I take a little piece of metal and I use my last magical tinkering. Oh no.

To make it every time, every time I walk by, it goes, neck breaker rules. Nick Brecker rules. Neck record rules. Like every time. That's so special. That's actually pretty impressive and I'm looking over.

Look, what's this? Oh. And she picks up a few items and you let her, right? One of them is the two and a half foot Eun-unzug spike. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She goes, now check this out.

I can do something with this. Oh, yeah. I mean, be my guess. It'd be my honor to have another goblin tink on my thing. Oh, okay, all right. Just so you know, they're not super useful at tripping people down a spiral staircase.

Not as good as you'd think. Okay, well, I think I would just mess with it a bit and do something, and then, and look at these. And she picks up the items that you had cooking for a lot of a better term. And so what does she pick up again? She picks up a piece of... She picks up a piece of Bizzy's crown that I've been turning.

I've now molded into what looks like a pin, like a brooch that you could like wear on your cloak. It's sort of like this twisted knob, but it looks like it could be like the shape of a mask, like a theater, theatrical mask. Awesome. And then I took the top hat that Maxwell had that I had originally given to fibs, and I've reshaped it into sort of a cone, dunce cap situation that I've etched stars and moons into, but I'm also not measuring fibs at all have cut a massive hole in the top to thinking I was

molding it to hide his receiving hairline but it actually perfectly frames his weird scalped wig so it's like weirdly hollow in the front but it's like a dunce cap in the top and what is it made out of it's made out of like a weird like like top hat leather like oh yeah yes yes okay she goes and these are quite magical yes I I I I I've been practicing my craft, and I read about it in books. I would sneak from the Unzog Library. I would sneak looks at them. Oh, we don't mind stealing here.

That's what we're all about, is piratic activity. I learned about coursing magic through items by harnessing the magical essence and then weaving it into the very fabric of the item itself, using all of my tools. That's quite impressive. Yeah, it's pretty cool. It is? It's cool? Yeah. I did a cool thing?

Yeah. If you only did that, I mean, I've got some gadgets here we can look at, but I have to tell you that it took about 20 of us to do it. Tippy is one of the fastest, coolest artificers I've ever known. And also, Tippy always smells great. Fantastic hair. Thank you, though. Never trips over anything. Very good at hiding.

Very good at hiding. Thank you, Scott. Overall, TIPI is one of the best people to be around ever. Yeah, I'd say so. Yeah. Thank you so much, guys. Yeah. What they're saying has some truth to it.

I did fall down, like, not too shortly before I met you, and I missed a big shot. Like, and it went, it went awry, even though I was inspired by my friend. Tippy, Tippy, I think did that on purpose. I think that Tippy was being a distraction so that we could have a good conversation so that we could get here, because that is how good and talented. And I was fighting a whereat.

And charming that Tippy is, where he doesn't fall and doesn't look stupid. I tried to grab the gun, and I blew up. Actually, I'm not as cool as they say. I'm actually useless. Maybe I'm useless. Because the last couple times I tried to fight somebody, I was face down on the ground.

My own crossbow pointed at me. And then I was blown up. And then I just wanted cheese. So maybe I am just good with my hands, but I'm definitely not good with my brain. Well, sounds like a goblin to me. Yeah, I guess it does. Do you have a spare gun that he could have?

Yeah. I think that would really cheer him. That would really make me feel better, yeah. He's so vulnerable, and I just think it's so strong when you can be that vulnerable. I don't understand how, oh, your friends are saying all these nice things, and then you're talking some terrible stuff about yourself. I just, I'm just so sweaty all the time, and I feel like I got a good grip. I know, I know, but how am I supposed to stop busy from getting shot by some random dwarf?

If I can't hold a crossbow steady in my hands because I'm so sweaty. How are you even here? Because, and the where it goes, all right, I'm going to set things. You know that feeling when you hear one interesting thing, and suddenly you want to know more? Well, that's the idea behind my podcast, something you should know. Every episode starts with a question you've probably never thought to ask. Like why people do or don't like you? Why certain habits stick?

or what everyday advice is actually wrong. I'm Mike Carruthers, and I talk with scientists, authors, and experts, and I keep it practical, surprising, and fun to listen to. If you've got a curious brain, come try one episode of something you should know on the podcast app you're listening to right now. Welcome to Mick Unplugged, the number one podcast for self-improvement and modern leadership. I'm Mick Hunt, your host, and I'm here to challenge your why and fuel your brain. because. This is where leaders, entrepreneurs, and go-getters come to level up. Each week,

I bring you unfiltered conversations, game-changing strategies, and the kind of motivation that transforms lives and legacies. I've learned from legends like Les Brown, Damon John, and Robert Irvine. And now, I'm bringing their lessons, along with mine, straight to you. From modern leadership tips to creating unstoppable momentum, this is the podcast that redefines what's possible. Hit play, subscribe, and join the millions who've made Mick Unplug their go-to source for growth and greatness, because your next breakthrough is just one episode away. This is Mick Unplugged, the voice and face of modern leadership entrepreneur and self-improvement. Let's get started. Great, look, Piccarra, they can get us into Fiends United. They're very useful. We are.

We almost lost this battle. We would have. If I hadn't come to me senses and realized that Crandall was a lying idiot. Yeah, he sucks. Crandall. Hey brother, I wouldn't say that you were shit. Thanks. Yeah, I could have had you. But, um...

I mean, I was in, it was in me form, you know? If I had a gun, though, it would be so different. I would just be blasted, like, ah, you know, you're coming at me trying to buy. Yeah, I'll see that. So, I'll give you confidence, eh? So much confidence. Like, confidence maybe I've never known before. How about this? We do have some materials here. We're not going to use all of us between the three of us, so we could lend you one or you could pay for it. It's just we can't just...

Well, how much how many dungeon gold is a gun? Two and fifty gold pieces. Okay, but how much copper? Oh yeah, we've got way more of that. That's 25,000 copper pieces. What is the conversion? It's happening. There's more copper than gold.

What's the point that's so much to carry? It would be so heavy. We don't have time for this. We can't talk about the price of guns. And even if we could, I don't want to. Fair enough. But we could lend you one for this project that we're putting together. I would happily be loaned to maybe lease to own.

Certified pre-owned. Yeah. Certified pre-owned, least-to-own situation. Honestly, it depends on how useful they are. We don't know yet, but I could see Ray Tell really getting into this. You know, we don't really have any other monsters is in a faction, so. And he goes, well, Piccarus are equipment kind of girl. So if she says yes, then, yeah, sounds like a yes.

And Picara, those things I worked on that you wanted to see. Oh, they're yours, for sure. Do you think they're ready? Oh, yeah, have you? You haven't looked at them, have you? I wasn't sure if I put the finishing touches on yet. Well, only you would know. But yeah, they look pretty cooked and well down to me.

So I take them and I go, guys, you've been so, kind to me. You didn't have to. Back then, I tried everything to escape and let the dungeon have its way with you, and, you know, there was that paladin that one time, and I definitely, every time I think about running, and I don't. Not because I didn't end up running, it's just something stopped me from running, but I am now realizing that maybe the other thing stopping me from running is friendship. So I made these things for you guys. Here's a pin and here's a hat. And they're quite magical.

In fact, that hat is a hat of wizardry now. I learned it from a book, and the hat of wizardry allows you to cast any cantrip you want off of a... Really? Literally any can't trip you want off of what wizards know. Once a day, there's other things it does that somebody else can explain. But yes, you can cast any wizard cantrip you want. and you can cast the spells from the hat.

So I can just hold the hat? Yes. I love this. Yeah, so if you ever get your staff knocked out of your hand, you can just blast from the hat. Hat blasts. Hold on, I can't attach my head to this one. And Phibs takes off his hat and the hair comes with it.

The dwarf and the halfling are like looking away at this. It starts just ripping the little stitches of the hair out. Oh, my God. Watch the wifs. Watch the waffles. Oh, sorry, sorry, thank you, thank you. And he starts to attach it to the hat of wizardry. That's Timi gave him this really f***ed up looking

human hair that used to belong to a paladin that Tippy just referenced. Yes. And Busy, you've got so many useful spells more useful than me, but you're always having to use at least one of them to disguise yourself. Now you don't. That charm's a mask's charm, and it allows you to cast disguise self

once a day and it ends at sunset and there's other things that it can do that somebody else who's smarter than me can explain to you but that's what it does so now you don't have to use owner your spells to cast this guy's self it's like a little brooch yeah it looks so cool oh it's right on the um what is it what what were they trying to shoot at the other day tit it's right on the tit it's right on the tit great oh you made me a tit brooch of course thank you of course that way Yeah, maybe it'll stop. If somebody tries to shoot you in the tit might deflect, I don't know.

Hey, that's per- thank you, that's so sweet. Of course. I am constantly in awe of how smart and clever you are and only the strongest people are able to be vulnerable in front of new cute goblins. And I think that that's fantastic. Right. Oh, unkey tippy.

Yes. You know how you made a finger for the zombie? Yes. Roof, what do you want? Well, you can see that I've got a couple of legs that aren't quite right. Maybe you could make me two different spider legs. Oh, you know what, with the right materials, I could. I just...

Unkey... I don't like the sound of that. Unky tippy just needs a nap. You just have to lean in. No, I'm not going to lean in. In fact, you need to lean in because you don't have to anyways. All right. So is that a yes?

Let me work on that. Okay? Does that sound good? Thank you so much, Unkey, Tippy. Okay, you're welcome. God, Unkey, stop it. How do I look? And the hairs sewed on. Not as well as it was,

so some of it's kind of like dripping down like bangs over his face now. Oh, I think I have it on backwards. Oh, that's great. It did kind of like a party in the front, but then you moved it to the back. And the parties in the back. Now I'm all fibsness.

Yeah. I'm so happy. You look like a real wizard. I'm gonna get you a gun if it's the last thing I ever do. Guns will solve all of our problems, you guys. So just for your reference, Danielle, you have the equivalent of a hat of disguise. It's a mask charm or something or a charm. Mask. Mask.

Mask. M-A-S-Q-U-E mask charm. Ooh, and it's fancy theater. Oh, oh. My charm spells theater R-E. And then Dan, you have a hat of wizardry. Hat of wizardry. Amazing. And...

I'm gonna get more cards. Yeah. So, Piccar has been watching all this and she goes, Now, dose of the magic ever run out. Only if I die. Oh. If I die, it goes away. Yeah, it fades.

Then I have to be honest. That is the most powerful magic of really ever seen from one being. Really? I mean, I just like saw it in a book, and then I was like, oh, remember the book. No, no. This is very... impressive, like I said, the other things that we're able to do, I mean, it's, um, gosh, maybe we've got three of them in the marks who can do, like, high-level stuff like this, but for the most part, like the magic runs out or...

It's just something that feels intuitive to me. Gosh, I'd love to learn from you. I'd love to learn from you, like how to make guns, like how to make a lot of guns. All right, deal. Not right now, but, so take a look at this. This one's for you. It's mine. It's mine, so you might have to bring it.

I can return it unless I die. But it's, it's... Oh! It's awesome! Hey! Guns are not toys! Oh! I love this!

So it's pink, it's like completely pink. Oh my, awesome. It's all pink. It is made of iron and lead. There are silver markings on it, and she has inscribed the six dots around in a circle. Do you mind if I just, I mean, I already could see an improvement. Do you mind if I just make it just make it?

Better really quick? Tippy goes in and like removes a spring and like scratches like a little happy face on the side and now I've infused it with repeating shot, which means I don't have to reload ever. It just a shot magically appears every time I shoot. So I go, check this out. There's only, there's only 10 bullets.

Is there how up stairs? Yeah, so there are, you're not. You're not alone, like you're not the only campsite. So, you- Tibby unloads the gun almost completely. Someone falls off an airship in the sky. Just a good little screen. You sense that some stirring is happening

in the other tents and campsites, and you actually get like a cyclops standing up and he goes, oh, handle it. And he like comes clomping up. He goes, what is going on? Oh, I, sorry, I was just fixing this new amazing gun I have, and now I could just- We're trying to sleep here.

Oh, sorry. You know, if it wasn't for knack-breka rules. Nac-breka rules. You'd be in my gut right now. Oh, weird. Weird offer, but I'm okay. All right, keep it down. And for my silence, for me not eating, what do I get?

I guess you don't get me making loud gun noises. And Piccaro goes, it's all right, it's all right, here you go, and she tosses him a couple of gadgets look kind of like junk, and she goes, there you go, just you and your missus can go to sleep now. And he goes, thank you. And he wanders off. Duffer goes, right, we might want to keep it down a bit.

We actually are planning a secret heist. Gotta put away the AK-Nomi 7. A lot of people don't have firearms here, so we don't want to make it known that the marks might be here either. Right. Well, you know, I've been preparing for this moment, so I take out all the rocks that were in that weird holster I made, and I put them in a different pouch, and I finally put the gun in the holster.

Big moment. Big moment for Tippi. That looks so good on you. You look so cool. Does that look cool? Yeah. Does it look right? It looks like, like instantly look like, it's weird, you look like more manly,

like more confident, like more of a man. I feel amazing, I feel amazing, I feel amazing. Honestly, I feel great. Well, I like that it gave you some confidence. It totally changed your demeanor. Yeah. Are you like busy later tonight or? I'm planning a hoist.

Oh yeah, same. We're all planning a hoist. And I like, to be out of characters sort of leans on things, anything, like the closest thing. Maybe he's leaning on the dwarf, and he's just like trying to look, like, hot for the first time of his life. Okay.

She goes, I'll have a question real quick. Are they invited back up to Wretched Cove after this? And the way out goes, well, everything goes right. We'll all be on a ship carrying the safe with us back to Wretched Cove by tomorrow night. And she goes, oh good, so at some point, I won't be doing much. All right, at some point, you might be doing a date with me.

If you're free. At some point. You might just be doing a whole date. She says, oh, wrong. Sidebar. Did I do that right? Did I do that right? That was perfect.

That's incredible. I've never seen it done more perfectly. I don't know if I've ever seen it done. No. But that's the best it's ever been done. That was the first time I ever hit on another goblin. That's so, you know what? you need next time, you take like a circle or something

and I'll just like make noises outside and just like, whr-r-r-r-r-wheel out and then everyone will know how cool you are. And maybe you can cast a spell so like dust comes out. Oh, 100% black smoke. Oh my gosh, they would know how amazing at working on engines I am. Yeah, like everywhere we go.

Next time. You know what? I'm gonna like seat it right now. Okay. I love engines. Oh, good. Maybe we should have- Cool thing to say. Maybe we should have him look at some of our ships that might be fixing.

Yeah, I'm an engine goblin for sure, double time on the engines. Well, this is quite done, and everyone's all set up romantically. Then I'd like to propose that we get started planning. For sure. And you see like, if it was a cinematic moment, the camera would fly around and zoom all the way into it.

Place on the floor where the halfling spreads out his hands and starts setting up a miniature, of what they're looking at. So we don't know what's going on inside the manor. We know it's two stories. We imagine maybe there's a basement. Beyond that, we don't really have a building plan. However, what we do have is these little magic mirrors.

It would be great if you guys could put them up somewhere whilst you were inside of the manor. Piccarus says, they feed back into my orb, and I can attune to the orb and see which mirror I want to see from. The other thing we've got, we've got two. Stones. Right, well, what they do is allow you to cast message telepathically for 24 hours in between the two stones and me orb. A Tumen engineering. So good at that.

But it only lasts for 24 hours. But it's the best I could do and I think it's going to help us. Because again, it's just us six right now. Did you include crandal in these calculations? Absolutely not. That's right. So we have the mirrors. Yeah, the other things. You said the gold is in the basement.

Is it in a vault? We just have a suspicion that, yeah, it'd be a big, How much gunpowder do you have? Oh, I bought some barrels, probably three of these, this size. Do you think it's enough to blow the safe? We just don't want to ruin what's inside. We imagine there's some pretty high-profile documents. And we need those.

And you know, I love a document. So we can't blow up the safe? You could blow up the entire manor. We can. Headquarters. This is escalating quickly. And then never forget, we've got the airship on the other side of the Scravix. So what's the plan with the airship?

Are you gonna fly it over us and... Yes, it's our get over. It's our getaway ship for sure. The idea is that we get the safe or whatever it is and crack it up at Wretched Cove. So the plan is to go in, blow it up, leave. Is that what I'm hearing? We'll be Nacbreka Ruins.

Nacbreka ruins. We can make that noise. Vr-uh, make that noise. Oh, yes, as we leave. Oh, let's time it so that. Oh yeah. And we don't have to break in because you guys gave your fingers.

Yes. Yes. We'll go in, start going on the tour. I've got my clipboard. I can be a distraction. And so while we're talking, you know, hey, this is really cool. I love touching walls. I'll, like, touch some walls and we can talk because I mean.

Supernatural thing to say I do it all the time. I love a good wall. Yeah, it's like tactile, right? Like all over my little bones. And so while we're doing that, we can also cozy up, maybe see if we can get some information. Yeah, from Kaya. From Kaya. Yeah.

Find out a little bit about why this human is all up in our business. With an aggressive real estate acquisition strategy. And if while we're there, you know, if we get to like hard quartel on Debs and Mimsy, I call that a win. But I did not give my actual finger, so Piccarra, is there anything we could use to sneak the explosives in? I suppose. What are you thinking? What's something that the fiends united? Do they, do things come in and out?

Do they need supplies or like? Crandall goes, I actually can help with that. I've been watching and there is slogs wash and slog's water from the drooling dredge that gets delivered twice a day in big vats. You're welcome. Here's an idea. You two go in through the front door. Right.

What if I dress up as slog wash delivery guy, um, but plot, is it's full of boom boom juice. Yeah, I go in, I get set up, I put explosives all over the place, cover our escape, and then once you guys place the mirrors and get the papers, oh, boom, bang! We've been back here listening to your plans, and they sound better than Crandalls. And honestly, yeah, if you've got it down,

then we're on board. Yeah, that just sounds like what spies do. That sounds like what a heist would be, right? Go in, take stuff, plus a pop. The other thing is, so I'll be back here with you. the orb and Chab, the dwarf, he might be able to help in some way nearby. And then we do have some money that we could hire mercenaries if you needed some from the town. What if we hired people to like go in there and be like, oh, we want a kegger, we want a kegger

so we can get more amongst barrels? Are you suggesting that we perhaps hire members of Fienes United to suggest they should throw a kegher at their union hall in the hopes that they will agree and place a bigger order For slop? Two 100%. Okay, no questions. I'm on board. Maybe we could hire, maybe we could hire the guy,

that guy that thinks I'm cute. The Oger. Yes, you should hire him. Somebody should also be ready to bring in a second shipment. That's Chad, but he goes, all right, that can be me. Dapper says, all right, so what the jobs are, you are in charge of getting more slogs wash for Fiends United tomorrow.

Yes. But the demand for it is going to the auction ogre, who's going to demand that they are going to throw Slog's Wash kegher. Then Chab, our dwarf friend, is going to be round two of Slog's Wash delivery. Yes. Meanwhile, fingerless skeletons are going to go get their fingers

and get recruited. On the inside, putting the mirrors up. Picara's going to be at the orb. I'll be at the airship. And steal the things, get the papers, go on the airship, make it all go boom. And is there a place we should meet if it maybe all goes south?

North. Sounds like a plan. Everybody hands in. Oh, okay, so that's a dupor and that's Chab and that's Piccarra. Ooh. And then here comes Crandall's hand. Ew.

Okay, got it. All right, what do we say? All right, let the heist commence on three. One, two, three. Let the heist commence! And that is it for this episode of Sages of Sundry Goblin Mode. Join us next time for the Heist of the Century. I like that I drew this symbol and basically just drew a chocolate chip cookie in my notes.

You're thinking about that all session long. Welcome to Mick Unplugged, the number one podcast for self-improvement and modern leadership. I'm Mick Hunt, your host, and I'm here to challenge. challenge your why and fuel your because. This is where leaders, entrepreneurs, and go-getters come to level up. Each week, I bring you unfiltered conversations, game-changing strategies, and the kind of motivation that transforms lives and legacies. I've learned from legends like Les Brown, Damon John, and Robert Irvine.

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