Critical Role & Sagas of Sundry - C2E1 Curious Beginnings

Episode Date: January 11, 2022

In Wildemount, seven adventurers coalesce in a tavern before finding themselves drawn to a mysterious circus... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Insurance isn't one-size-fits-all, and shopping for it shouldn't feel like squeezing into something that just doesn't fit. That's why drivers have enjoyed progressives' name-your-price tool for years. With the name-your-price tool, you tell them what you want to pay, and they show you options that fit your budget. Enough hunting for discounts, trying to calculate rates, and tinkering with coverages. Maybe you're picking out your very first policy. Or maybe you're just looking for something that works better for you and your family. Either way, they make it simple to see your options. No guesswork, no surprises.

Ready to see how easy and fun shopping for car insurance can be? Visit progressive.com and give the name your price tool a try. Take the stress out of shopping and find coverage that fits your life on your terms. Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and Affiliates. Price and coverage match limited by state law. Hello, everyone. And welcome. Tonight's episode of Critical Role.

For a bunch of us, nerdy-ass voice actors, sit around and play the first game of our new campaign in Dungeons & Dragon. Super excited to be back. I've missed this a lot. I miss this. You have to be fine. So yes, glad you guys can join us. Apparently, it's some crazy numbers. Welcome new viewers. Welcome to viewers. Welcome to our folks. Hope you, enjoy your stay. So, without further ado, let's get this going so we can get through our announcements. Since it is our first episode of the year of the campaign, I want to make sure that we get our announcements. out of the way. We've got some cool stuff to talk about. First and foremost, we have two sponsors tonight. Our first sponsor, and we're going into kind of a time, a cool partnership with

the folks at D&D Beyond, actually. They've been really awesome, and we've been talking, and anybody who hasn't seen it, it's an online digital tool where you can create your own D&D character. They have options to purchase any of the current D&D books out there and carry over any of the character options and racial options over into it, so you can basically use it as a tool. We'll be using it to help us out in the game as we go, because it's actually got some pretty cool stuff. So excited about that. It is dn d beyond, by the way.com if you haven't seen it. Not the ampersand, it's dn dn. As in... As in...

As in... Dund. But yeah, so they're going to be a long-term partner for the show. So they're working with us through the start of this campaign. We're super excited to be with them. Yay! But yeah, so we're excited. You can currently... activate, it should be now, some critical role content on there. They should have available the Blood Hunter class that I created a couple years ago. I'm kind of refining. It should

be available for you guys to find on the D&D Beyond, which I'm excited about. And there's a one-time discount of $10 off any digital book in the D&DBion.com marketplace if you use the code word beginnings going in there right now. So yeah, get a chance to check it out. So, yeah, so I'm super excited to have that, guys. So you apply that code at checkout to make it happen, so in case you're confused in trying to get it to work. There's a bunch of stuff to explore on there and a bunch of cool ways to incorporate the existing breadth of D&D lore

and options in there. And now you'll have some of our stuff in there as well. And hopefully more critical role content and Tadalore content and Exandria content down the road to also be available on there as we go. So super excited about that. Palliate. All right. Thank you guys at D&D Beyond for being awesome.

We also have our second sponsor, Sam, if you want to take it away. I'm our second sponsor. Thanks, Sam. No, welcome new viewers. Every week or many weeks, I am charged with writing the ad for the sponsor of that week. I did this one way back in mid-December, so it'll feel a little stale. Sorry. Sorry. I didn't have time to write a new one.

Apologies to our sponsor. But our second sponsor tonight is Backblaze. They offer unlimited cloud backup for Macs and PCs. You can restore from the web or via hard drive. They'll even overnight FedEx a drive to you. And because it's Christmas season, I wrote this. T'was the night before Christmas when I clicked on my mouse, but the drive wasn't worth.

It had said, adios. When up from the cloud there arose such a sight. I knew in a flash that my shit was all right. As I spat out my plate of cold chicken Kiev, down my chimney came a weird little elf named Lev. I said, whoa, whoa, whoa, how'd you get in my place? Love gave me a wink and punched me in the face. And suddenly he fired up a pipe and started to restore my computer

from a backup he carded. My documents like slash fiction from my little pony, My photos like me naked covered in baloney. He mumbled that you can get backed up at once for a merry little fee of $5 a month. You even get 15 days free if you scroll over to backblaze.com slash critical roll. And just like that, my computer was on.

Lev greased up his body and bam, he was gone. But I heard him exclaim, Peace out, yo, what's up? Happy Backblaze to all. Don't forget to back up. Back up! I'll write another one for Easter, I promise. Thank you, Sam.

Sure. Oh, my God. Thank you back, please. Happy to have you for a sponsor tonight as well. Also, as a heads up, we've had our friends at Wormwood for a while. I've been awesome in providing wormwood dice boxes and dice trays and dice towers to giveaways people in the community. They have new boxes for all the players of the new campaign. And they've been working on something for a while for us to kick off

the new campaign. They made us a new table. If we can go to a camera view of this table they made for the campaign. It's made out of English Brown Oak. The center critical role inlay is made of Ash Burl as the background, and then Rosewood for the D20 outline. Weng, wenge? Wenge. For the critical role words themselves and silver stringing around the border. It was built by hand in their Massachusetts office and workshop, and it was hand-rubbed oil and a wax finish. Over a hundred hours. were put into this table. They did an incredible job and we're super honored to have that here. And thank you guys for showing, you know, such an awesome appreciation for what we do in helping.

It's really nice. I have a copy. We have coffee. It smells like wood in the studio. Like fresh wood. And when we get canceled, this is going to be a great dining room, too. This is true. Thank you guys, Wormwood. If you are familiar with any other stuff, go to Wormwoodgaming.com. That's W.Y-R-M-Woodgaming.com. They do awesome work. It's very really super high quality. It's great. So thank you guys. All right. So let's see. Upquip updates we can get through. Laura, do you have an update for merch stuff for the new year?

Ah. Ah. Yes, I do. It's a new campaign, new us, new merch. I don't know which camera I'm looking at. That one. So you guys, so we released our teaser on socials and everybody was like, I want this a poster, so we listened to you. Oh, really? A post-out! No! That you can have on your wall!

Oh, good! You guys, and we printed us all a small amount, and so those ones will be like shipped faster, and then after that it'll just be pre-order, but I think it's all listed as pre-order, so just so you know. Can you Photoshop out my crotch region? No. No. That would be a lot of Photoshop, man. None of us had that much talent in posts.

But let's just talk about this, Matthew Mercer. Let's not talk about what I... When I put that outfit on, I did not consider, quite the permeation in my life it would become. So there's that. So yeah, we can be with you always. Thank you. Matt can stare at you while you sleep.

That's actually how Pervon dressed. God damn it. Hey, first throwback. Well done. Oh, yeah, we got to be careful guys, because we have a lot of people that haven't watched the last campaign or haven't finished the last campaign. So no spoilers for last campaign.

I don't really remember it. Well, we all die. That's true. Okay. Next announcements, the critical podcast we have currently up to date. All of Fox Machina. All of Fox Machina's story. The whole first campaign is now on the podcast. You can find it where our finest podcasts are downloaded. And do we have an update as far as the release schedule for this podcast? Yes, we do. They will be releasing one week after the we are live. So they will be one week behind.

Great. So we're on Thursday? They will be releasing on Thursdays the week after. Fancy. Don't have to be hot up. Yeah. Oh, so you can listen to it in the morning and then watch it live at night. Oh, man. Sure, sure.

If you have a lot of free time. Yes, you can. Or really long drive. You have extra eight hours to spend every Thursday. To be fair, you guys would have about as much free time on a Thursday as I would. Cool, so I look forward to that. Comic Book, Issue 4 of Critical Role Box Mocking Origins, Liam, when does that come out?

It is coming out on the 24th of this month. Oh, Meginsuna. I've read it. It's so good. It's real good. It's so good. You guys, boxmach and a story ended at this table, but it is going to live on and on and on, at least for three more issues. Yeah. So thank you very much.

Check it out everywhere. Yeah. On Zoon. On... Dark Horse. A Pondon. Dark Horse app, Comicsology. LineWire.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Napster. That's all good. It's all good. It's okay, guys. A couple more things, thank you for hanging in there. As far as con appearances go, I actually fly tomorrow to Miami, Florida for Paradise City Comic Con. I'll be there tomorrow till Sunday.

If you guys haven't, are in the area, come say hi at the convention. It should be fun. I have panels and signings and stuff, so hopefully see you there. Also, I'll be at Lexington Comic Con and ToyCon in Lexington, Kentucky, March night to the 11th. 11th, Odafest in Calgary in May 18th to the 20th and Acon in Texas, June 7th of the 10th. Wow. That's a lot. I know. I know. We have Emerald City Comic-Con, me and Travis. Awesome. First weekend of March. Yes, that's right. Bad ass. Yeah, Paul Lancet. Cool. Yeah.

All right, so pairing it down, I'm finishing up here. Thank you for your patience. Go, go. With the new campaign, I want to renew our appreciation for and make sure that we pushed to you guys that we from the very beginning have been supporting a really amazing charity called 826, 826 LA being our local chapter. They have 826 groups all over the United States that they do after school creative writing and a lot of great creative classes for children who are they're unappliced or don't have opportunities to go to these types of classes. They do wonderful, wonderful work. We've been supporting them from the very beginning and we're just doubling down on that

for this new campaign. You guys, there's a community, have been fantastic in supporting them, and all the charities that we've supported from the very beginning. Christmas every year has been a very prime example of that. So I just wanted to continue to push that forward. Share the love, and a big thank you to 826 for being such an amazing source of creative drive for so many young kids who normally wouldn't have that opportunity.

So you guys are amazing and show them your appreciation if you can. Yeah. Final shout-outs. One, thank you to Ian Phillips of Iron Tusk Painting, who has painted the miniatures for this campaign. Yeah. He actually painted Me and Murcha's caketoppers for our wedding, and whenever you've managed to see the miniatures for the campaign, you can know that it's his handiwork.

Soon. Soon enough. Also, fun fact about Ian Phillips. I grew up with him. What? I didn't know that until like a month ago. He was one of my brother's best friends when we first moved out here to LA. And so when that name was floating around, I was like, wait a minute.

And then we reconnected back on Instagram. It's such a crazy story. You know, Critical Role brings it all back here. I love it. So you can follow him at Painting Tusk on Twitter. I've had him paint like 20 to 30. I'm kind of addicted, 20 to 30 miniatures. He's amazing. He's amazing. He's amazing at what he does. And final thank yous to Warner Brothers and Monolith Entertainment for letting us incorporate the Shadow of War soundtrack into our critical role soundtrack here on the air. So those will be coming into the new campaign. And super excited. CD Project Red has been nice enough to allow us use of the Witcher series soundtrack to also incorporate into the campaign.

Which, honestly, when we started playing at home, The Witcher soundtrack was most of my music, and I couldn't use it when we started streaming, and so it's been kind of a cool, full circle to be able to bring it back in. Plus it brings a unique flavor that kind of works with the new campaign setting. So with that, I believe our announcements are done. Thank you for bearing with us. We're scared. We're going to give. Oh, that's that later. Afterwards.

I understand. We'll show. Oh, there's one more announcement. Well, go ahead. Our announcement is our brand new opening time sequence. Yes, yes. Which, I think we're ready for it. I think we're ready for us.

So, as we bring it down, guys, let's go ahead and prepare to dive in to the new year and the new campaign for this episode of Critical Role. And welcome back. Wow! That was good. We've definitely returned at the table. Thank you, Sam.

So. Oh my God. Wait, super fast. We've got to go through credits. Oh yeah. Oh, yeah, go for it. Okay, so normally we don't do this. I did this once before when we release our first other opening title sequence.

Yeah, our 50th. So we're gonna do this again. These are just people who like get, like, get, who do so much and who do not get enough love. I'm gonna shout them out. Sean Becker, who's the Unsung Hero of Keegan Sundry, is our executive producer. T.J. Routelle, he's like our production manager around here. He makes sure we actually have like cameras. Maxwell Jay.

Maxwell Jay. We're a producer that makes this show go every week. Danny Carr, our production coordinator. Yeah, that's all day. Huge producer here. Steve Sprinkles, who directed that amazing, okay, Tyler Ziggins. Not a real name.

Jay, yeah, I know. I love it on the slate, it always says Sprinkles. Jan Michael Lassada, who is our DP, and is the same DP from last time. Tristan Savage Tate, who's our first AC. Shondella Hunt, who is our key grip. Yeah, he is. Tyler Hart, who is our gaffer,

who gaps everything around here. Jenny Newman, who did the amazing wardrobe. She sourced all the wardrobe. Ren Witting, who is one of her hair and makeup artist. Vanessa Marie, who is her second hair and makeup artist. Got it, got a Posey Sosa, who is our production assistant. Selina Ruth. Well, these are these a lot of these papers?

I know, I know. Selena Ruth, who did additional photography, and she also does stuff every day. Because I didn't they only do their own car? I know there's going to be this many. Brandon Clark was our location manager. Pamela Joy, who shot all the photographs. And Loretta Richard.

They're with Aeroom Photography, and they did all of our thumbnails, too. They did that poster. Go check them out on Instagram. They are the jam. Air Loom photographer. Jason, who does our music. Chardon Hutzh, who does our post-production, and Andy Englett, who edited. Oh, my gosh.

Yeah. Okay. Now I go. I'm sweating a lot. That's okay. Thank you. What a night. Well, guys. This has been great. Holy shit. Everyone.

Oh, yeah. Everyone. Oh, God, oh God. Can we open our fucking books yet? Welcome to Wild Mount. The year is 835 PD, or post-divergence. This continent is divided both by jagged terrain and political powers. The Menagerie Coast,

collection of city-states, united under the Clovis Concord, monopolizes the southwestern shores and ports of Wildmount, thriving on open trade and cultural freedom. Beyond the Sirius Mountains lies the massive region known as Wynandir, bisected by the Ashkeeper Peaks. Eastern Wynandir houses the expansive wastes and turbulent badlands of Jorhas, overrun with all manner of beasts and terrors, relics from the final battles of the calamity. that ruined that scarred landscape. Northward, you would find the graying wild lands, a lawless realm harboring a curse that has kept it unconquered by human hands.

However, this story begins in the territory of Western, Wanandir, within the boundaries of the Dwendalian Empire. Emerging 13 generations before, the Dwendalian Empire has slowly spread to encompass the surrounding societies of the region, absorbing the peoples of the Zemni fields in the Merro Valley, before finally conquering the jewelist dominion and taking the whole of Western Windandir for the empire.

There will be no test. No. This is... Let me continue. Under the rule of the current King Bertrand Dwendle, now in his 68th year, most are left to their own devices. You live as you did before.

The crown only takes a tie. of what you produce and earn, you follow its laws, worship its gods, and bow to its installed local leadership. In return, denizens of the empire are protected from the chaotic horrors and shattered evils that stalk the edges of the civilized lands. This accord has led to a prosperous century for the empire, or at least the political elite.

Tensions brew beneath the chafing watch of the Crown's guard. Every temple is government owned and run, and worship outside the approved idolatry is met with imprisonment. Rumors of military clashes at the eastern border near Jorhas have many common folk on edge. Our story, however, begins much smaller. Here in the southern reaches of the Merrow Valley,

beyond the entry gates of the Wuyun Gorge lies the small rural town of Trostenwald. Bordering the blue waters of the Uyrooong, in the blue waters of the Eustelac. This town came to prominence near the turn of this recent century, when the surrounding fertile farmlands were discovered to produce a unique type of grain and wheat leading to a boom of breweries.

When the gluts subsided, three large families stood triumphant in the local business that fermented the lights. Now Trostenwald thrives on their exports of fish, crops, and ale. Here in this sleepy trade stop along the Amber Road, a handful of wandering destinies slowly begin to intersect. We begin in the early hours of the morning, on the day of Grisson, in a messy room on the second floor of the nestled nook in. A bleary-eyed, bruised man in a tattered

coat slowly wakens from his lengthy sleep, catching his small, snoring ally curled at the foot of the bed. Liam, if you would like to describe your character, please. Oh, um, no. Oh, my God, no pressure! Were we supposed to prepare this? No, but. I'm pretty filthy. I have sort of a mess of reddish brown hair, and really filthy roadclothes.

I wear a long coat that I slept in. I slept about 20 hours last night. Ah, geez, unshaven a bit of a mess. So far you're just talking about. What color are your mind? I need visual. They're blue. I like it.

There you go. That's it. It was a rough day yesterday and that's it. All right. And your name is. Oh, Caleb, a widow guest. All right. As your smaller friend curls awake, Sam,

would you like to describe your character? Yeah. Um, I am a little little. I am a little goblin girl. I am a goblin. So you know, the green skin, the green hair, the yellow eyes. And she wears not great clothes, just like her traveling companion there. She kind of hides in the shadows a lot,

because she knows goblins aren't kind of welcome in this part. in this part. And that's about it. I mean, she's a little skittish. And right now, she's probably stirring awake as well, right? Well, what's your name? Oh, Not the Brave. So Caleb, as you come to consciousness,

you glance over and can see slowly snoring and rousing at about the same time, Nott's eyes blink open, her kind of slowly groaning face looking over towards you. You're finally awake, I see. Oh yeah, motherfuckers. It's on. You were out for quite some time there.

Rough day, eh? Not our best day, no. Now, I mean, usually you're so good at everything, but yesterday you were just... Maybe you needed the sleep is what you needed. Thank you. Well, don't thank me yet. I should probably tell you what happened while you were asleep. I mean, you were asleep for so long. I got bored, frankly. I was going through my pack and reorganizing. Has anybody seen you, seen you, seen you?

Well, I mean, many people. I got bored. You. You. You. You've never slept that long, so I left, I went downstairs. I thought I'd do a bit of window shopping, and you know how sometimes I get the itch, you know? I do. Did you make it back here okay at night? I'm here, aren't I? Yeah, you are.

Yeah, I did. But I might have been spotted by a few of the crowns guard. Hey, did you have the mask on? No. No, I, no, I didn't. But they didn't catch me. Okay, okay. Listen, I'm sorry, I just sometimes I get the urge I've got to take something, you know.

I was trying to replenish what you lost yesterday, and I think. Well, we discussed coming to a bigger town, it's going to be a little more difficult now. You can't go, it was easier on outskirts, it was easy in farms, but we can't do that here. I know, I'm sorry. Yeah, yeah, no, I know, you're right. Yep, it was, I just got a little bit, you know, squiggly. That's all. Okay, well, I think today you should have the mask on at all times.

Yeah, good idea, Caleb. It's better when we're working together. If you're going, if you need to steal something, do it with my help, all right? Yeah, yeah, of course, yeah. Back up the conversation a minute, thank you, because I would not be alive if you had not. You saved my life, so thank you. No problem.

Yesterday was really not great. Yeah, well we'll do better today, right? Sure, sure we will. Are you hungry? Oh yeah, I'm starving. At this point, you notice the gentle smell of cooked meats and the promises of mediocre porridge and eggs just barely begins to creep beneath the subtle floor

of your room and meet your nostrils. Well, Matt, what are we going to do today? I can go down and get breakfast and bring it up here. At least, I don't know. I meant I'm a little wary of just splashing back into the town right away. Let's go down and get some food. I'll come with you, because as you said, we're better together. And we'll take it from there. You need some books and stuff, right? All right, well, that's on the to-do list. All right, well let's get something to eat then. All right, so you prepare yourself with your mask set over? Yes, yeah, so I'm gonna put, I have a, like a half a mask that kind of covers my goblin face, and with the hood over kind of obscures, maybe it's not a goblin, maybe it's a little halfling person or something. Which is helpful, in this southern, more rural region of the empire, especially near Felderwyn, which is one of the largest

kind of tilling and farming areas of the entire empire. It's a very heavy halfling population. And so while this city is not the core of it, let's say you probably see a larger 20 to 25% of the population here in Troston Wald is halfling. So you pass off pretty decently as long as you keep away from discerning intent eyes. So the two of you managed to gather your things

for the time being. Wander down the stairs from the top floor down to the base of the tavern, which the air is already bustling with townsfolk and all manner of travelers preparing to take on the day's responsibilities. Yorda, the 40-something woman barkeep of the shoulder-length blonde hair and weathered skin you had previously rented your room at the inn from. Frantically darts behind the bar while the red-headed barmaid rushes from table to table. It seems that the clientele is a bit more than they were expecting this morning. Yorda yells from behind the bar to the barkeep.

Adeline, two more brights and a bit of mush to the corner table. And she kind of looks like, I'm working on it! and she runs over and heads back at the kitchen. There's a faint bit of music as two kind of slovenly looking musicians in the corner are trying to work for tips at the small hat on the floor that looks like nobody's turning any coin into it. But the tables are fairly busy, except for maybe two

that appear to be available between the two of you guys if you'd like to find a seat. Sure, is that easy to do to find a seat? Yeah, you walk over to it and you sit down. What did we roll for? What do we roll for? You sit down and do the chaos that ensues around you, it takes a little while for Adeline, the red-headed barmaid, to come by and she kind of scoots by the table.

I'm terribly sorry. What can I get you? You know, meat if you have it, but if you don't, that's okay too. Potatoes or, you know, bacon if it's on the menu, but, you know, really anything... I can get you all three, it's fine. What you want? A trost for each of us, please. For breakfast? Yes. I like you. All right, two trosts and a bunch of meats.

Right back, and she rushes off. She kind of pulls her hair back and ties it as she goes into the kitchen, kind of getting ready for the midst of chaos. While you guys have a moment there at the table, you can hear conversation muttering around you and you have a brief bit of privacy to discuss. Yes, I need books. That's true. But did you find drink yesterday?

I have a little left in my flask. How much? Just a couple swigs. So that's also on the to-do list then, yeah? I mean, if you don't want me to get too jittery, yeah. All right, okay. Okay, so we'll do that first, all right? All right.

Short time passes before the two platters are rushed over and scattered across the front of your table with a clattering pile of meats there set for you. A little bit placed on the side, because you might need, especially with the look on your face, Adeline kind of gives you a glance, goes, put something in your belly. It comes back and slides two trosts to you.

Remove my little mask. And then just go. I take the last piece. I take the last piece. As you guys are part way through your meal. Let's see, this would, Caleb, you notice out of the corner of your eye, a gentleman entered the door looking kind of meek.

Middle age, looks work-hardened. He has kind of a heavy chin beard that is kind of unkept and a bit wild, but his eyes are warm. He's holding his hat in his grip, and he scans the room with an eager glance before his face brightens, and he begins to push his way across the room, kind of in your direction it looks like. He scoots over towards your table, and as you're about to turn and kind of see what he's about. Bring my hand on my purse. He pivots to the table next to you instead. He turns to you three.

Oh, I'm thinking of this all time. Yeah. You've met this man the day before. Renaldo, the fisherman, who you had aided. And as he approaches, he goes, you, might I sit please? Of course, take a seat. Okay.

And as he sits down on his chair, I would ask each of you to please describe please, starting with you, Laura. Oh, well, okay. Well, I'm just, you know, a little blue tea fling, that's all, with blue hair. And, you know, I'm wearing like a pretty cute dress, that's all. And I'm having a good time, you know, we're just having a good time here at breakfast. All right.

And you? Yeah, yeah. I'm, you know, a simple girl, simple needs. just wearing like kind of nice baggy clothes, some monk vestiges, they're in kind of like nice blues and grays. You notice have a blue sash around my belt. Got a nice shave kind of going on,

a little undercut. Looks like maybe I put on makeup like two days ago and I'm like, yeah, it's still holding up. It's fine. I can work with that. What's your name? Oh. We'll get to the way.

And thank you. And Travis, describe yourself please. Yeah, I'm here too. Oh, what? I'm a half ork sitting here and kind of beat up Leathers. Have a big scar across my face. Do do do do do do.

Green skin tone and kind of got some like piecemeal armor put together and stuff. But my name's Ford. You're very handsome. I just need to tell you that. Thank you. Appreciate that. Which has, as Rinaldo sits down, clutching his hat still in his hands, and I thank you for your time for it. And I apologize, I forget your names. Beauregard.

Beauregard. Jester. Yes, thank you. Yes. You all came when no one else would yesterday, and because of you, my daughter is still alive. Oh, yes. Sorry about kind of for being like a pessimistic asshole,

by the way, when you first came into town. Oh, that's okay. I'm not used to things like turning out good. So you do well at the side of the air by. Anyway, I won't keep you, but I spoke yesterday, and I didn't have much to give you and sent you away with nothing but my gratitude. But I've been asking around the other fishermen

in our lockspan and we've put together a little bit of coin for your troubles. And he turns this cap over under the table, and this catches your attention. You hear this clattering of coin. Your eyes kind of glance over, especially you not. And watch as he beeps this pile of what looks doing mostly copper and silver pieces

with a couple of glimmers of gold. And as soon as it clatters across the hardwood table here in the center of the tavern, other faces begin to turn and kind of gather attention as to what's happening over here in the back edge. And he kind of takes this cap back and pushes it forward towards all of you, is kind of dirty, you can see cracked and very, very calloused fingers kind of shoving it

in your direction before taking his hat and placing it back over his head. That's so cool! Those coins went all over the floor? All over the table. The table, okay. I hope it's helpful, but thank you. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, no. We can't accept this, right? I mean, it's too much.

We're supposed to at least say that right, and then like still accept it, right? I think you're supposed to do it if you say it. Well, I mean he did go around to a bunch of people. That was a lot of work on his part. I would hate to make him go back to all of those people and give it back to each individual person. Fine, fine. If he didn't keep a ledger, you know, we wouldn't want to do that.

It's rude not to accept a gift, right? It's rude not to accept a gift, right? It's rude not to accept a gift. I would hope that is the case. Anyway, thank you very much. I'm sorry for getting in your way. And he stands up and gives you all a nod, and kind of rushes out of the tavern,

a little embarrassed by all the attention that's now placed on them by the other patrons, and as he leaves, everyone kind of goes back to their business, a couple of wandering eyes, just starting to count what coins are there as you slowly met them in your direction. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. How much, how much?

It comes to, there are four gold pieces amongst the pile, 22 silver, and 48 copper pieces. Gold, 22 silver. Can I clock the room so who else is watching her count? Perception check. How many copper?

48 copper. Is this the first raw? First roll the campaign. Oh, come on, come on. Natural 20. And that's how you started. That's a good moment. All right.

So I'm leaving it to you too. That's counting. Which is really hard for me personally, but there you go. How do you split up four gold? We have four gold and there's only three of us. I don't know. Well, I actually did pretty good at that card game, so you can have mine. Oh. Yeah.

I will. Okay. So two for each of us. That's great. Oh, that's a good one for you, two for me, two for, oh wait, no wait. That doesn't make sense. She's your treasurer? I don't know, man.

It's hard, okay? You dig, man. It's hard not being the treasurer. Two to Jester. Sweet. One for you, one for me. Thanks. And then 20 to silver.

That's. Tell you what, you do that math while you're getting this out and figuring out the division of your gains. Episode four. You glance about, you're narrowing your orcish eyes across the room, and you can see two other tables. There are some gentlemen who are peeking over, and as soon as they meet your gaze, they go right back to their business and completely shrink away. There are two gentlemen, or how I'd say, there's a man and a hooded figure, and a hooded figure, at a table immediately adjacent to you. The man looks rather filthy, his hair bit unkempt,

and he's trying to just finish his drink. However, the smaller kind of half-looking figure is just glaring intently and is slowly leaning in the direction of the table. That's creepy. Fucking disgusting. God. I think we have people watching us.

Always watching us. Well, just take a look right over there. Don't arouse suspicion, but did you hear all that coin hit table, Caleb? I did. It's on the table, though, so I think on the table it will stay. Yes, but we could follow them out. We could do the money pot. We could run rat food. We could do Prince and the Popper to get it from them. We could try spider eyes. Any of those could work to get it. Are you guys staying here? This blue skin teethlings and they leans over at the view of the table. Don't move. Seven silver for you. Don't move. Teethlings can only see.

movement. In 16-clock. I don't think that's true. It's very true. We have a hard time seeing things that aren't moving. It's very true. But I can hear you. You should take a bath.

You know they have showers here. It's possible. What now? You bathe yourself in water. No, I've bathed before. Yeah, I know what a bath is. Because you smell really bad and it's wafting over this direction. I'm just letting you know I would hate if I smell that bad and someone didn't tell me.

I have only just met you. Hi, I'm Jester. Hi, I'm Caleb. Nice to meet you, Caleb. How much silver did I just get? Seven! Woo! And 16 copper!

Aren't you all jealous? Morning? Morning. Morning. Make a perception check, Beauregard and jester. Oh, hang on, I have to paint me so. Whoa. Are you checking your D&D Beyond specs?

I am, I'm adding my goals. 22. It's very important. I haven't even flipped over to my character sheet yet. Oh, man. This is crazy. 19. Okay. Now I'm flipping.

The somewhat meek female halfling who is now suddenly very reserved. and not as filthy as the human compatriot that she keeps. It seems less and less half-ling, the more you glance in her direction. The ears are folded inward but elongated, the tingees of green to the skin, and with the little words that have poked through her lips, you can see what appear to be,

teeth more jagged than expected of the half-folk. I just shout over and I say, good morning in half-ling. I know Halfling, right? Yeah. I'll shout back. Top of the morning to you. You like a coffee?

Seems like I love to buy a coffee. We've got free coffee. Yep. Yep. I'll take it. Sure. Thank you. Being mighty fucking friendly, they were looking at our coin. Why can't they even looking at me? Maybe they were looking at me. I didn't think of that. Yeah. Maybe they were looking at you.

As Jester said, you're handsome. Just, um, uh, he's... Yes? He said Jest. I just thought he said my name is all. Oh, I said your name. Oh. They might said your name too. Never mind.

I don't know. Could I get another trust over here, please? Two, two, please, right away. Eventually, Adeline comes by and brings two fresh toss to the table and kind of glancing about at the unique tension in the air right here. Did you like anything there as well? Oh, yes. Lots of baked goods, if you have them, please. Port belly if you haven't.

I don't think I've seen you eat anything other than pastries. I really like them. I'm kind of concerned for your well-being. It's fine. I'm not that concerned. Eat whatever you want. I'll have bacon, some. Whatever. All right, pork is Barry back. She rushes off to the kitchen. You guys just continue to awkwardly stare at each other. I'm going to put my hand up and say quietly to not,

the money pot is not for them. It's not for them. It's for farmers. Okay. Yeah, yeah, you're right. You're right. Not these three. That was stupid. Yeah, of course. Will you have perception rolls earlier? Yes. But I said it really quietly.

She rolled the 22. But she can hear my little whisper. I mean, I get this. No, you heard the whisper. You're not sure what the words are. Okay. But I can see that they're whispering about us.

Yes. Okay, cool. In halfling I'll say to whatever, Beau. Bo. Oh, for sure. It works. Are you in town for business of pleasure?

Can I inside check? I'm too exciting? Make an inside check. Okay. Okay. Oh, my God. What's my insight? What did you say? I mean you, you are a girl. What are she saying? Shit, that's really hard to remember now. You're asking me what I'm saying. Yeah, what did you just say? 13?

13? I mean, seems to be genuine, hard to read through all the wrappings shadow and the hood, still obscuring the face. Are you cold? Do you have the mask on right now? I think I do. Yeah, it's this kind of porcelain covering that has painted lips and it's a little... It's really cool. It's a little unsettling. I mean, I'm sorry not to be blunt, but you know, it's pretty obvious.

Goblins are not welcome strolling about. She's a cold. Yeah, yeah, but you don't have to be. to make a big thing of it, all right? There could be people who don't. No, that's right. She's my companion. She's my friend. There's nothing to make a big deal about. Let's just, she's... That's why she's wrapped up. Just leave it, please. I didn't ask why she was wrapped up. I know. We're not making a big deal out of it. You're making a big deal out of it. Somebody asked why she's wrapped up. No, nobody asked. Somebody said the words, this is Liam. Why are you all wrapped up?

Oh. Oh, I asked if she was cold. That's concerned. As Kayla finishes oversharing. It's so over. It's old times, man. It was a different universe, different life. That was Earth 3. At this point, there is a bit of a commotion

towards the entrance of the tavern. Two shadows step into the doorway of the nearish noon-day sun. the figures, one that kind of eclipsing the other from behind, begin to step in. You notice one of them begins to step from table to table, kind of glancing about with a sort of grace to the movement. The other, staying a few feet behind, tells me we'd like to describe your character, please. Oh, wait, what?

I didn't know. Neither did I. I didn't either. But here we are. A lavender... Damn it, Travis. A lavender teafling with red eyes and... curled, very pierced, extremely ostentatious horns

that are just pierced with little gems and little bobbles. He's got a tattoo that seems to be running up the side of his face, a kind of peacock tattoo. That goes off into his very ostentatious, ridiculous overblown robes that he wears and his two swords and pouch dangling at the side of his hips. He's very, very broad in his dress. So literal and figurative peacock.

Oh yes. What a figure? No, I know, mine, who knew? As this tea fling directs from table to table, a few feet behind you see. Wait, did you say your name? No, I didn't say my name. No, it hasn't come up yet.

Okay, so there is a woman behind him, taller than your average, less. She's very, very, very pale skin. Her hair is black that starts to turn white as it gets longer. it's matted, it's dreaded, it's braided. Her clothes are a bit tattered, but just sort of, she's a bit of a mess. And she has two different color eyes.

One of them is sort of a light greenish blue, and the other is a violet color. And she's very sort of, very standoffish, hunchy, arms folded. You watch as these figures, slowly move from table to table, the Tiefling engaging in some distant conversation, and then leaving a slip of paper, and then walking into the next table, gauging the atmosphere, not leaving a slip of paper and quickly moving on, and then eventually your eyes meet what looks to be two tables

with a very motley crew of individuals that are both awkwardly avoiding their own tension and currently trying to figure you out. Can I tell if, where are they in the dispensement of the dispensement of the of the coin. Can I tell they have a little coin on them? Did I catch any of that? They've completed distributing it, so you don't see any coin, unfortunately. Well, I don't believe I've ever seen a group of people more in need of a good time in my entire life. Well, and what do you think, the Fletchling of Moondrop Traveling Carnival of Curiosity's?

If there was ever a group of people that needed a good time to go out, have a laugh, see things that you have never seen before, and my God, take my word. word for it, one month's time, people will be buying your ale to hear the tale of what you saw at the traveling carnival of curiosities this night. We saw your tent going up! There is, you did. We were actually going to go without the flyer, but like, now we also have a flyer. It's just five copper, steel, it's a five silver, it would be a steel, five gold, worth every penny, but...

If you've got the five copper to spend, we would happily have you all. Oh, shit. Do you perform? Ah. I'm less of a performer and more of an intermediary for these parts. I do on occasion perform. I can read fortunes on occasion. I was going to ask if you read fortunes.

Can you do one now? I knew you were going to ask that. Oh my gosh, you're so smart. Look at this guy. He knows everything. I don't think. I'm going to sit down to the table. Okay. He goes and sits down to this table finishing its presentation.

One of the barmaids kind of comes up to you and looks up for You up standing almost a solid seven inches taller than her. As I only goes, Miss, can I get you a drink? Yes, can I have a drink, please? Just a mail. Coming right up. Any preferences for the families? Bombok.

Stay clear of Bombok, they're bigs. This is kind of true. Just a big. Hustledorf then. Yeah. All right, I'll be right back. And she wanders off. Well, who has coin for a fortune?

Do you know my name? What is your name? Jester. I know your name now. What is your name? Oh, my name is Molly to my friends, and we're friends now, aren't we? Oh, pleasure. Molly?

Molly. Molly, for short. This is Yasha. She's the charm. Hi Yasha. Hello, Yasha. Hello. Yasha.

Hello. Yasha. Now, would anyone like a fortune read? I would love one. Do you have coin? Yes. How much do you want? Two copper.

Two copper. Okay, I just got some copper. Here you go. Marked on your two copper. Hmm. I am taking this in. Alright, I'm going to try and do this. Greetings adventurers. Spring has sprung here in Los Angeles,

and that means it's a brief period where it's only 75 degrees instead of 95 degrees. I'll take it. And that means I've been outside a lot more. Walking around, occasionally galloping after a toddler hopped up on juice boxes, traveling a bit, you know the vibe. And after doing some spring cleaning, My wardrobe, I gotta say, looking a little bit sad. I want clothes that can keep up with me and my son, but updating my wardrobe every spring

sounds pretty expensive. So that's why I wound up signing up for Fabletics as a VIP. It let me overhaul my springtime outfits without obliterating my bank account. New VIPs unlock major savings on that first purchase, so trying new fits feels way more doable. When I signed up as a new VIP with Fabletics, I got 70 to 80% off everything. It made it easy to grab a few new pieces without overthinking it. And the quality really surprised me. Everything feels premium and soft and breathable,

but you're not paying those premium prices. What I like most though is how versatile everything is. You've got stuff you can work out in, but also wear out. There's matching sets, lightweight hoodies, joggers, teas, you name it. The kind of stuff you can throw in in the morning and not worry about later. When I'm at home, my favorite thing to pull on is the oversized hoodie. It's so comfy I could just live in it 24-7. It's perfect.

for walking my dog on like a chilly night. But what I'm out and about, I've really been loving the ribbed Johnny Collar polo. It makes me look like I should be taking a high-powered meeting by the pool at the White Lotus, but hopefully with less murder involved. I don't know. It's insanely comfortable.

I highly recommend it. So shop now at fabletics.com slash critical role to get 70 to 80% off everything when you sign up as a new VIP. Take a quick style quiz and be sure to select critical role when prompted to unlock your 70 to 80% off. This is a limited time offer, so don't wait. Again, that's fablatics.com slash critical role for 70 to 80% off everything as a new VIP.

And now, on to the show. Greetings, Adventures, adventurers. Lately, I've been getting a bit more intentional about what I wear from day to day, because instead of just falling out of whatever laundry baskets nearby, I've been leaning into pieces that feel easy and comfortable, but still put together because it just makes getting dressed simpler when I have a plan. Quince has been my go-to to help with that, because the fabrics feel elevated, the fits are clean, and everything just works without me needing to overthink it.

And Quintz has all the wardrobe staples you need for spring. Think 100% European linen shorts and shirts from just $34. They're lightweight, they're breathable, they're comfortable, your legs and torso will thank you, and he will still look put together. And clean 100% Pima Cotton Tees with a softness. Well, you've got to feel that to believe it, believe you me. Their pants also hit that same balance. They're relaxed, they're comfortable, but still polished enough to wear basically anywhere. And everything's priced between 50 and 80% less than what you'd find at similar brands.

Quince works directly with ethical factories and cuts out the middlemen so you're getting premium materials without the markup. And since spring is here in Los Angeles, a brief period where it's 75 degrees instead of 95 degrees, I spruced up my wardrobe with a pair of the comfort stretch traveler five pocket pants, and the Heritage washed denim shirt. Not only do they feel great, but I unequivocally look good as hell while wearing them. That's just science. So refresh your every day with luxury you'll actually use.

Head to quince.com slash critical role for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada too. That's Q-U-I-N-C-E dot com slash critical roll for free shipping and 365-day returns. quince.com slash critical role. Okay.

Oh my gosh, really? You doing so? Mm-hmm. So, as he pulls out a small set of cards and begins to shuffle them at the table table. Go ahead and roll an insight check. He's really quite good. You all should line up and get your fortune told.

Let's do a 16. Okay, so you get a, I mean, just the brief conversation here. You get a pretty solid read to the excitability, the eagerness, the, the, the exorbitant interest in just getting in your face that this person wants any fortune you tell would probably suffice. Go ahead and roll a slight a hand check as well. Look at this fucking game. Also 16.

Whoa. Yeah. And you feel pretty confident that her eyes are locked onto your eyes at the moment and not the deck as you set up a proper reading. And the cards are shuffled. They're set. You place them before you and you may give your fortune. I'm gonna just keep my eyes open for any tricks of the hands, slight of hand-eat-of-hand-eat-type trick. Make a perception check. Uh, perception, perception.

14. 14, all right, everything seems pretty above board. Oh. Your first card, the Silver Dragon. Yes. This is good. You're pure, of virtue, you are worthwhile and wonderful human being, obviously, or creature of some repute. That's what everyone always tells me.

That's true, and heading towards the anvil. What is that? And is a destiny forged as something bright and adventurous in your future. Wow. You know we did just defeat a really big snake, so maybe there's even bigger things coming up, you know? Can I make another role? Actually confirmed worst hype man ever. Uh-19.

Yeah, easy enough. Honestly enough, even discerning eyes at the table, you are on the top of your game. The serpent card appears. Of course you did. I'll do that. I saw all the cards. I'm simply a vessel of higher powers. Yeah. While everybody's watching this shit happen, may I cast detect magic in the room? You may. You kind of lean back and subtly begin a brief muttering of an incantation.

Your fingers kind of washed through the air with a faint silver gleam across your fingertips. tips. Nothing magical shows up in the immediate vicinity. Will you ask the cards if I'm going to find them? If you're going to find her? Him. Him. Him. Give me a little bit more. Who is this him that you're looking for? I'm looking for my dad. 14? Fumble for a second, but the card still finds its way through that issue? Hmm. Pushing through, pushing through. The eye. card pulls up. You've already found the clue you're looking for, you just don't know what it is yet.

Really? Apparently. That's what the cards are saying. Oh wow. It's right in front of you. Does it say how long ago I found it? Because that's... Sadly, I don't have that sort of specifics that's much more expensive. Wow, that's going to take a lot of thinking. Well, you find us at the show, you'll find my tent and I'm happy to give you a more complicated room. I can't wait. It's going to be so much fun. So much fun. Yasha, at this point, the barmaid, Adeline, comes up and hands you

the ordered ale. Thank you, my lady. On the house. On the house is our good fortune. It's very kind of you. Do you perform the circus too? No, I do not. I just put it up.

Oh, cool. You're like, a roti. Yeah. Some big tent, it would take a lot of work. I put up the stage, I move things around. I'm very strong, but I don't do anything in the show. Some of our acts are a little complicated with performers who are not. The traditional variety can make some of the locals get a little

shifty if you know, and it's good to have a few people around who are capable of keeping issues contained. Yeah, is that why it says no admittance to the elderly? You don't want to deal with those Riley elderly. Or the ill. Yeah. Why no elderly, though? It'll kind of make sense, but elderly.

We cannot be held responsible for anything that may happen to someone who's ill. or infirmed. It is such an exciting, impressive show. We've had people die watching it. Really? Just from excitement. Just from excitement. They died in the show or from watching? Yeah, just like heart attack. Just from getting so excited, I guess. It can be a lot. Right far. We gotta get so wasted. When is it? How long is it? When is it? It is actually the day of Kristen and your first show is tonight. His first show is tonight. Well, we have plans tonight! Yay!

Do you stinky people want to come with us? Um, I, Kaylee, we don't have any plans tonight. I guess we could go along. I wouldn't mind seeing me. It'll be fine. Or you could stay here and buy beer for the people who do see the show so that you can hear all about it and pay more. Yeah, we can go. This is going to be so much fun. Yeah, yeah, it sounds like a good night, yeah.

Look at all these friends with us. making here. This is a good city. Yeah it is. Yes, yes. Well you are all the most charming people I've met in yes, I'm finished my beer. Well, we better be getting on. Yep, nice to meet you. Oh, you're so wonderful. Charm, pure charm. See you tonight. And as they could have lead you, Yasha just downs her entire ale slams on the table and both them walk out, passing a couple more flyers at all off tables and then exit out into the rest of the day. Sun beyond your sight.

She was awesome. She didn't say much. That's why I liked her. Really, really cool. Did you see that cool thing she had going on her? Oh yeah, that was right. That was interesting. I wish I would have thought of something like that to do.

Yeah, I mean, you could maybe do something like that in time. Just like wait so maybe you... No, she doesn't know that I'm coming. I can't do it tonight. No. Wow. Cool, what do you guys want to do now? Was he using magic?

I don't know. Are you, you're superstitious, yeah? No. Okay. No, not superstitious, no. Sure. Why? I mean, you, like, kind of, what he was working in was kind of like,

he was kind of doing a little, like, he, he's a smart guy. He's a smart guy. By the way, he's a smart guy. By the way, you open your Christmas present for me. No, not yet, no. You should go open it. Right now, okay. I'll be right back.

Go grab the bag. No, I'm serious. I'll do it on the break. I'll get it on the break. Hey, Matt, dungeon master, are they, they're wearing what they described. They're not wearing any cloaks or anything right now, are they? She has a small, actually, both of them have small cloaks kind of over the shoulders. Do I recognize those cloaks?

No, you do not. What? What? Why would you recognize the cloaks? Maybe I saw something. I don't know. I didn't see them last night? No. Okay. Wow. Okay. Interesting.

Mysteries. Also for the record, there was nothing magic about that. Maybe he's good at reading people, but that was not magic. Oh, Caleb knows everything about magic. He's been even teaching me some. He's real good. You should see him. He can... Caleb, are you going to go to the Academy? Why? He could if he wanted to. He's really good at magic. He can make a cat appear and disappear whatever he wants. Really? Yeah.

A cat? You watch as just beneath the table this kind of orange, kind of patchy tabby, kind of leaps up onto the... Oh! Oh shit. What's his name? Oh, this... her name? Well, it is he. This is my cat Frumpkin. Frumpkin. Frumpkin, yes.

Oh, can I call him Flumpy? You can call him Prumpkin. Look at this lumpy! Oh, who? Made in England. That was a little straight gift from Erosha, so this is Prunken. That's so great. Yeah, that's not all we can do.

Caleb, tell him all this stuff you can do. It's really impressive. Sometimes less is more. I can do things too. With magic? Yeah. Like what? Like, um...

Not to me, not to me. Like, oh gosh. Okay. Actually, these both... I'm going to use Darmaturgy, and I'm going to make all the windows in the place, like, open up really fast, like crash open. Jesus. Jesus. Jesus!

Slam open with a sudden burst of wind and all the various bits of torchlight that light the deeper, kind of more shadowed corners of the room, suddenly darken and flicker. The music suddenly comes to a stop. Everyone kind of holds their position and kind of glances over to the table where you're all sitting. Jester, don't you remember us talking about keeping a low profile? You're right, I'm sorry. I use tomaturgy and I close all the windows. They all slam shut a second time, the light flickers and then brightens back to its normal place.

Tadda! Yeah! Yeah! At the carnival, I'm really good. One really crotch-y-looking guy in his early 50s with a super under bite, probably missing most of his teeth, just goes. Yeah. I tell, telepathically, tell Frumpkin to jump up and sit in the lap of the woman in the monk's robes who just made a big scene and hopefully keep you're occupied with being a kid. Okay, as soon as you sit down, a pumpkin leaps into your lap and starts like purring and rubbing up against your hand.

Oh, hey, buddy. Sure, right now he likes- Is this a real cat or is this like a fake cat? What do you mean a fake cat? Like a magic cat. He's both a real cat and a magic cat. Is he an illusion cat? Could you feel him?

Could you put him over there? Are you allergic to pumpkins? Oh, no! But he's a magic cat. How can you be allergic to magic cat? Yeah, I'm pretty sure you're real fucking cat. He's one of those hot. hyperalogenic magic cats.

I don't know what the fifth edition rules are for allergens. As far as you know right now, yeah, he's having an actual allergic attack. A minor one, but. I walk away a little bit from Ford. Okay. Shit. Well, you're both magic users then? Yeah.

And so is the larger fellow? Well, I mean, a little. Yeah, I mean he's learning. He's getting really good at it. I'm trying to learn more. Yeah. You should have seen him. He disguised himself the other day, and it was like... Thanks, Jester. She's better at it than I am. We're trying to make our way up to the academy to get a little bit more learning done. Well, he's going to learn. I'm not going to go to the academy. Yeah, this academy place kind of keeps getting brought up.

Yeah, it's the place to be. Okay. I mean, you... What... I'm sorry, what academy are we talking about? Sultras Academy, you know. The what? Solstress? Soulstress. Soulstress.

Yeah, that's a soul trade academy. Yeah, that one. It's a very fancy place. You know. It's your magic. I have heard of it. And you have arcane talents as well? Yeah.

Why? How long have you had yours? That's a tricky question. I studied when I was Yonka and then I gave it up for a while. I've picked it up again recently. So, you know, it's all book learned, though. Wow, that's cool. This was a good way to go for your first, like... A freaking cat! This is, actually, this is kind of therapeutic. It's kind of making me feel better.

Just about life in general. Oh God! He reads lots of books, Caleb does. He's very smart. In fact, should we go looking for? I'm all right now. You know, in a little while. Can I see one of your books? Well, and I open, sort of pull apart the lapels of my coats. I have a book in what modern day people might think of as holster straps, but there's

a book hanging here and a book hanging here. I think ancient people would call it a holster as well. You think I guess, the books are right here. I have these, but these are family heirlums, so I don't share those. share those, but no, I just, I'd like to read. That's all. And I'm a little, I'm a bit of a self-starter, so you know, I have to find, I mean,

good luck at the academy, that's Rapha here. Do you know anything about it? I mean, because we're just going up. We know it's like rich people that go there. We have to find a way to get you in. Right. All I know is how hard it is to get you. Yeah.

You don't have a lot of money then? Well. No. We had more. But then we lost it, but then we got back. Somebody had a gambling problem. Oh, which one? What's the name of it again?

It is the... The Queen. Crick Queen's Call. Have you played it? No, I haven't. Don't. I'll teach you someday. It's so much fun.

It's a good. Yeah. Cards? Yeah. All right. I might like to know that. I mean I could teach you if you want. Yes, I would like to know that, yes. Okay, okay, okay. I'll deal.

Oh, right now. Yeah, sure. This will be fun. Is you okay? Listen, I would not be sitting here if not that you do whatever you want to do. Okay, it's three. You draw three cards. Well, I give you three cards. So you'd use three D-Sixers. Three D-Sixes.

Yeah. Got one. Oh my goodness. I'm not you. I have one of each time. Okay. So hide your roll from me because we can't know. Okay?

So first you have to ampie up. How much coin do you want to put in? I'm out. No, it's all right. I will front some coin for you to play this game. Oh, great. How much do you want to front him? Low.

I will give you a silver piece. A silver. A silver. Thank you, Caitlin. Okay, I put the silver down to. I wish I had more. Okay. Am I doing this right?

So far? Okay. Now I'm going to give us three cards, so we both roll. But we can't see. That's good. Okay. Don't say that's good. Oh, I'm bluff.

Bluff. Yeah, yeah, yeah. How do you know I wasn't? I'm going to try to change one of my cards. Oh, so. No, wait, no, wait, there's rules. Yeah, without you seeing. See.

I guess a hand check. 12 plus 8, so that's 20. Make a perception check. Totally did it. She totally did it. This is really hard, Sam. You're only an hour and a half then. This is my only skill, guys. But you know that's my skill too.

Oh shit. So I'm going to try to do it as well, because that's my skill as well. Well, first time, would you roll for... I did not notice him doing it. Okay, yeah. So you get to re- We'll re-roll one of the dice. Okay. Okay, so I'm going to try to re-roll one of mine.

I have to take whatever it was? Yeah. All right. So, go ahead. So make a slide a hand check. Oh, right. Do I notice her? We'll roll perception.

Nope. 13. 13? I don't, no. Okay. So you also go to three. Okay. So now, okay, so the best hand you can get is three of a kind.

Then after that it's a straight. A straight, yes. A high straight. then a low straight, and then it's if you get all evens, or if you get all odds, and then it's two of a kind, and then it's nothing, it's just high card. Okay, but now we put in a second amount, because you can up the ante and you get one more card.

I don't. No, but wait, wait, wait. You can put in more money, and then I deal you a different card. You get to give some cards back, a card back, and I'll deal you another card. Should I? Caleb, do you have any more? Because you saved my life yesterday, you may have one more silver piece. One more silver. Okay, I'll keep it low, too, because you're only doing the one. So I only put in one silver too.

That's a four silver pot curtain. Yes. And now give one of your dice back, whichever one you don't want, and roll it again. So you get to re-roll. Okay, got it. Okay. And you get to re-roll one as well. I don't want to re-roll any. Okay.

Okay. Now you show what you got. Will you win? I got a pair of fours. I got three fives. Shit. So I draw my short sword. I immediately grapple him. Don't take my mother.

Make an athletics check. You make an acrobatics check. Acrobatics? 24. Whoa. Fourteen. So the female goblin draws a short You reach out to grab and she slips out of your grasp

and is now holding the blade at the edge of the table. You're cheating. Somehow, you're cheating. Not, not, that's fine, that's fine. She won the two sofa, my two sofa pieces. We'll just leave it at that. We don't, that's... I'm sorry.

That's okay. She's very jumpy sometimes. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. You can understand, you know, we've been living in the woods for a long time. Every time we come near any place like this, we're attacked, jumped, followed, so I apologize. I was stupid. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that.

I'm sorry. No, it's okay. Just don't do it again. But I'm sorry I took all this money from your friend. That's making it worse. So maybe give some of it back. Why though? But I want it.

Your Laura is showing. Tell you what, I'll give you none of it back. I can't. No, I insist. No, I insist. No, I insist. Okay, but I insist on the way back. I insist.

You should take it. Mine, thank you. Yay. I need another drink. A round of trosts for multiple tables, please. See, isn't that the most fun? It's fun. You're and I look over and goes,

Any preference for family? Not Buckbaum. Not brand to this. I'm impressed that you stuck to taking a guy's money in a training game. Right? That's... Oh wait, is that bad? Well, you know.

Oh. Well, I only learned, like last night, you guys. What is a training game? Just meaning when she was teaching. People took my money when I was learning. It's fine. It's water under the bridge. It's fine.

It's all right. Another round is brought to your table. I feel like. Share a solemn post-gain drink most to yourselves. You feel slightly worse. That's a drink on me. Oh, geez, now I'm definitely giving you your two silver bag. Don't worry about them.

She's just a couple of wild and crazy guys. Goods come out here. They have. Your meal's been presented for a while now. You've had the opportunity to eat most of your meal. That is actually... That's the power of imagination, Sam. That wasn't there a second ago.

Bangerang! Right there for you. So you all finish your independent meals and... and you can decide to continue your conversations or go about your business for the day. I just want to go to the carnival. That's later tonight, though, isn't it? If you have no business, we can wait until desk.

Well, there's that board on the wall. Has anything new been posted on the board? Yeah. You go ahead and take a look at it. There is one sheet that pertains to somebody in the Hillsward looking for folks to go ahead and do an extermination run near the southern portion of the Eustelok. It looks like there's, what looks to be a vole infestation.

It's a small rat. It's a rodents that digs. Should we do it? I don't think we have to go kill rats or rodents of your regular. Oh, that sounds interesting to me at all. What else is there? Currently, it looks like there was another sheet that looks like most of it is. torn off, and the rest of the board is pretty empty at the moment.

DM, did I tear that? I can't remember clearly. You did, yes. I can't see I can't remember. Wasn't it a delivery thing? Yeah, that was what it was. Yeah, it was to help move and load crates at one of the local breweries. You should do that. We've done that. It sucked so much.

You did that? We did that. We did do that. We did do that. We moved crates for eight hours. We did. Welcome to level two. We said no to that job, thank you. We get bored pretty easily.

We did, however, then gamble with the other workers. And then Jestered. Yeah, juster. Well, I lost it, but he made so much. Made a lot of money, yeah. Maybe not out loud to say that, you know, just a thought. Oh, that's right, we probably shouldn't. We didn't make any money.

Would you guys want company? Do you want us to come and hang out with you today? I don't know about that. That sounds risky. I don't know. Do you know something? Yeah. What? I shockingly think that's not a bad idea. To have these weirdos with us. I can hear you.

Yesterday was a very bad day. Yes. And... Well, I suppose if we surrounded ourselves with weirdos, then maybe it would take some of the heat off of me. Well, yes. Bottom line. Can you hang with the goblin? Bottom line, and I touch Nutt's shoulder, and I cast Blessing of the Trickster. Oh, Jesus, she's gonna kill me right now.

Any magic kills a goblin instantly? No. Yeah, instantly. That would be the worst, the worst careful choice ever. That would be amazing. We will mourn her. Oh, chute. Truth.

All right. Truth. Perfect. All right. Yeah, okay. So there's a slight sense of kind of warmth that emanates from under her hand. And for a moment you look over and glance instinctively, ready to almost draw your sword again.

But it seems to quicken your reflexes. You have this kind of surge of adrenaline that doesn't quite fade. You have advantage on all your stealth checks. The next hour. Thank you. You're welcome. That's very nice. Yeah.

I don't have a problem with goblins, but you guys aren't any sort of trouble, are you? No one's after you? Because she is like all kinds of trouble. No one is after me. Can I make an intet yet? You may. Uh, 13. 13.

13. Do I roll? If you want to go ahead and try and live, then make a lot. That's a 14 except negative three to performance. Oh, no. It's so weird. I've been waiting for this for so long. So that's an 11.

So are you lying? I am lying. I am definitely on the run from someone. Good to know. It's so... Hmm. What's this? The mask. I'm just fascinated by the mask. Looks well made. Did you make it?

That's a good fucking question. Did I make this? I don't do, I don't make things. No, I presume, and we discussed this a little bit, we presume it may have been scavenged from a porcelain doll. Oh, that's cool and gross. Yeah. It's like, what's your name? What's your name? The creepy dolls? Oh, yeah.

Annabelle. Annabelle? Oh, yeah. Yeah. No, don't say that. I don't want to see art with you with Annabel Face. Too late. The internet's running with that now.

Check your Twitter. And it's there. It seems we have all day. What were your plans? Not much. We were going to sample the trosts, the different trusts, and I wanted to maybe do some book browsing. Nothing major. What's a trust?

Brewery tour! It's ale. It's ale. So we just kind of go by the bombok. What happened with the bomb box? There's two others to choose from here. Yeah. They're who we loaded crates for.

And then we kind of swindled their employees. They don't leave on the best terms. No. Which one is the DM? The one that everybody knows is got the blessing of Frida Lange and the Star Roste. No, that is actually the Bombok. Shit. Yeah.

Yeah, the Star Rost is kind of tied with the Bombok family. Right, right. Like that were imaginary beer snobbs. The one you need? Is that the people that we've become? I'm just saying the one that you swindled is like the blessing of the big cheese here. Oh. Well, why do you need it?

We don't need it. It's just pleasurable to have a trust, is what they say. But she kind of needs it. I need it a little bit. You need fear? Well, I prefer the harder stuff, but I'll take what I can get at this point. Oh. Yeah, I'm sticking with this first.

fucking accent for the next two years. Hello, Jedd is every Friday. Oh my God. It's so great. So, beer tour than circus? I got to say, I just, you know, I miss those two people. We ran into the carnival. Well, well, if we just, you know, montage through a beer tour,

We'll quickly get to them with the circus. Yeah. Uh-huh. To the carnival. We can totally do that. Can we just bring my book browsing down for like a single roll to see if anything of use happens? Yeah, we can do that. We'll say if you guys decide to go ahead and travel the five of you,

you make your way through the town for the day, you coast around the Hustledore family brewery. You meet Vosson June, who are the... The two very nice ladies who runs the facility of the Hustledorf family, you avoid the Bombok, but can acquire Bombok ale from other taverns in the town, of course, and the von Brant family brewery. All of them, as soon as you say Trost, they correct you and say the family name. They're very intent on getting rid of the name of Trost as an overall discussion of Trost brand brews and trying to make their family name. Like, there's an offense to the point where you're like, oh, Jesus, I didn't really clean necks in tissue paper.

Yeah, a little bit. But you managed to get nice and sauced throughout the day. I take it easy. I have one more in the first half of the day and one in the second half the day. I don't have very much either. I'm going to have tons. I get sauced. All right.

Well, that being the case. You are poisoned. No, make a constitution statement throughout. Well, that was great. That was crazy. Ten. Twelve. Twelve.

Okay. You get a little woozy for a while, and as the sun begins to crawl towards the distant horizon, you do not manage to allow your meal to you serve your control. Oh, it's like the red fair. Yeah. Oh, don't remind me. Oh, no. Drop a dagger.

So as the day comes to close, you're fairly tipsy. You're not fully. fully intoxicated. For your trip, you wanted to head to the Hillsburg parchment and binding again? Is that where I went the last time? Except not as myself. So yeah, it goes myself. Okay, go to make an investigation. All right. Don't fuck me Vax. That is... That's Vax. That's Vax's dice. Yeah, the thing about even a light German accent is that when you say Vax and Vax is the same shit. So that is a 12th.

A 12. You take the better part of 30 minutes or so and you find there's a lot of books, a lot of books on farming techniques. There's a lot of books about how to grow, care for, different types of vegetation, plants, various beasts of burden, you find books on the different seasons and what's best for different types of grain and wheat. You manage to pull through and find a couple of books that deal with discussion of the Menagerie Coast that talk about what's called the Clovis Concord.

It's more of a discussion of the political structure that maintains all the city-states there. The person who ran this place was an older man, to sip in tea. Yeah. I'm sorry. You have a nice selection here. Do you mind if I ask? I haven't seen any other booksellers of any kind in town. I'm not really looking for anything on farming so much. Is there anywhere else I could look into? If you're looking for some sort of a library, your best best bettest to go is the dash up north.

That's where the library of the Cobalt Soul resides. They have all the information you could hope for. A bit pricier to peruse their interior, unless you have proper coverage. But unfortunately, if what we have isn't what you're looking for, I can't help you. No, it's a fine selection, sorry. How much for this book on Ho technique?

Oh, Jameson's Ho-Dakown. and sewed out. Yeah, it's quite... That will be two silver pieces. Oh, exactly. Oh, I'm very embarrassed. I'm sorry. I gave away my last two silver pieces. No, I gave it back to you remember. I gave away my last two silver pieces.

So maybe I can earn it back and come back later this week. Please do. I will tell me to hold it for you. Yes. What's your name? My name is Caleb Widogas. We do a guest. We do a guest. All right, I will keep it here under the shelf.

Thank you so much. Okay, good day. Thank you. Is this a big shop? It's boutique. It's designed almost like a cross. There's two cross sections, the hallways that have books across the walls, and there's a window at the end of each and then a door on the far back.

While he was talking to the shopkeeper, I'm going to take out as many books as I can and move them around on the shelves, and then take some of them and turn them around to the shopkeeper. them around to where they're binding his face in the inside. Go ahead and make a sled of hand check. Whoa, Metro 20. Over the period of him searching and distracting this man, you have completely rearranged the interior of this bookstore to the point where even in the far corner,

like you Ghostbusters stack them in the center of the room, floor to ceiling, with him not even noticing it. You're a fucking sultan. You feel confident and happy and a sincere, The sensation of approval washes over you. I skip out the door. Okay. You turn around from having this conversation

and notice the interior is not as you last saw it, and a bit of nerves begin to brew up under you. Trumpkin, come on. Here we go. Frumkin kind of follows up behind you. Oh, yes, Matt's got a big cat sounds now. I didn't even think about that till now. God damn.

All right, so as you guys have gathered at this point, The oranges and the pinks of dusk begin to peek through the quite cloudy sky. The chilled air of the coming cold night signaling the Crown's Guard to begin lighting the hanging lanterns that line the streets of Trostenwald. A renewed energy takes the streets as the sound of a fiddle seems to creep through the night. Ashley's a master fiddler, isn't she? All about your photo is, All air instruments, right? Oh my God. By the way, DM, can I ask some time in the entire day when Knot was getting wasted, could I have spent an hour using Arcane Recovery to gain back

that one spell slot I used this morning? Sure. I love that. All right. Folks begin to prod their heads out into the open air, curious about the source of this unusual din, and you find your vision capturing a small- The war is over and both sides lost.

Kingdoms were reduced to cinders, an army scattered like bones in the dust. Now the survivors claw to what's left of a broken world, praying the darkness chooses someone else tonight, but in the shadow dark, darkness always wins. This is old school adventuring at its most cruel.

Your torch ticks down in real time, and when that flame dies, something else rises to finish the job. This is a brutal rules-light nightmare with a story that emerges organically based on the decisions that the characters make. This is what it felt like to play RPGs in the 80s, and man, it is so good to be back.

Join the Glass Cannon podcast as we plunge into the shadow dark every Thursday night at 8 p.m. Eastern on YouTube.com slash the glass canon with the podcast version dropping the next day. See what everybody's talking about and join us in the dark. The world of Sonic the Hedgehog

has been thrust into a not-so-dark, not-so-stormy, hard-boiled detective story that probably nobody saw coming. Follow Sonic and the Intrepid Chaotic's detective agency as they take on their biggest case. Yet, this high-flying action-packed adventure will take them across the world, fighting for every quill they can fight. It's one heck of a tale, which is good, because this story might be the only thing that can save their lives.

Well, if that's all, I can just dispose of you. Wait, what? All will be revealed in. Sonic the Hedgehog presents The Chaotic's Kiotics. Case Files. Listen now, wherever you get your podcasts. When the chaotic are on the case. A procession of flamboyantly dressed people parading through the central road. A lanky man of some obvious elven descent leads the pack,

his long kind of ashy brown hair curling ever so slightly past his mid-back, his long coat and tails knocking around by his skipping step. Two half-ling women in purple and green body suits, from side to side, handing flowers to children and flyers to adults. As a bald man, in a neck-frilled frock coat of bright red, his face adorn in vibrant orange makeup to look like the setting sun behind him, plays the violin that you heard earlier in an upbeat, jovial manner. A tall half-orke with a masculine man with a well-groomed handlebar mustache that curves out to the side, billowing white silk shirt and black trousers follows behind with a big

drum slung over his shoulder going, boom, boom, boom, boom, along with the fiddle. The Tiefling man of lavender skin that you saw earlier walks along with a grin juggling two curbed cimitars as he walks in place, almost loses one and catches it, continues to go. Families are beginning to gather out to see this display. Two dancers, the two dancers part,

and then a woman of short, fiery red hair and dark skin walking between them. lifting a small candle before, a giant burst, a gout of flame, emerges from the front of her mouth, brightens the vicinity, and everyone collectively gasps, and begins cheering and clapping as they continue the walk. There, to the back of it, you see the rather burly-looking pale woman,

arms crossed, just following behind and keeping an eye like a security guard to ensure that no business gets out of hand. The gasps and the cheers begin to follow, and as the procession continues, down its way, the families and civilians begin to gather and follow behind. As the last bit of the sun sets behind the mountain range, the torch is glowing. The procession curves through the center of the lock ward

to the edge of the Oostalak itself. Through the fishing village, more folks begin to gather. Do you all follow? Yeah. All right. And now you cast Blessing of the tricks thrown you again, just in case. Thank you.

People following the parade, you see faces eager for this fresh form of entertainment. Children laugh and chatter excitedly, while the Crown's Guard, in their familiar bronze and familiar uniform, try to maintain order between themselves being quite curious or visibly mistrusting of these hooligans that suddenly have usurped the evening air. The procession continues toward the eastern side, out along the southern edge of this lockward, to The Eustelok Southern Place, towards the new, completely constructed, large, dark blue tent. Lengthy streamers of white and silver flap with the cold winds from the top of the structure. As you guys walk, you watch as the horned teafling you had approached earlier slowly saunter's up to your side,

you recognize these individuals you had spoken with earlier. I go, Molly! Molly, hey! Oh, it's my favorite, hello. It's us. We game! I'm so glad you all came to see the show. to see the show. It's going to be great tonight. It's going to blow you away.

The hype continues. You're going to love it. First show of a round is always the best, without fail. But where the best seats. Well, I'm always partial to the front. Okay, then you're right in it. If something goes wrong, there's nothing between you and whatever terrible bloody mess is going to happen. It's just the best.

What? Nothing, nothing, you're fine. It's going to be great, but before you go in, I do have to give you guys a pat down, because you can't go in with any weapons. At this point, a voice rings out behind you, and you see as the Colonel of Master Gustav, kind of glancing over shoulder, goes, You two, skip ahead, quick, we need to go ahead and set up. Looks like we're already having quite a few people excited to come here,

so at the door, interior to set up, meet us at the front. Actually, you want, you'll be on car duty. We need a little extra change on the side. Car duty, it is. All right. Folks, set up for your patronage. He spins around and addresses the whole crowd now. It says, enjoy the night tear, walk slowly. We need just a moment to set up. And the half-health man kind of bows and tips is large. It looks almost like a top habit. It gets floppy towards the top and kind of flaps forward and puts it back on top and begins sauntering,

continuing the music. But picking up their pace to get ahead of the crowd as they draw you all slowly towards the exterior tent. And that's, we're going to go ahead and take a break. Faces on fire. Faces on fire. Do you really have to get up our weapons? Do you really have to give up our weapons? I don't feel okay with this. Ashley, I'll do whatever you want, but if you get my, take my weapons, I might kill you.

I'd like to see you try. Oh, yeah. All right, so we'll be back here in a few minutes. We're going to take a quick break. We have our weekly giveaway from our friends at Wormwood. We have a white oak complete dice tower system. It's a three piece set. That's going to be a given way to one of you there in the chat.

The password, if I recall, is beginnings. Beginning, see, that's what you said. Yeah, that's what you said. This one. So if you're in the Twitch chat, if you want to be part of this, when you're prompted there, go ahead and enter the word beginnings once. If you enter it more than once, you'll get disqualified. So be careful with that.

Otherwise it gets to spam and spree of chaos. So the word is beginnings. When prompted, go into that, and we'll come back at the break with the winner of that. Regardless, guys. Welcome to the beginning of the new campaign. We'll see you here in a few minutes. Welcome back, ladies and gentlemen. Guys, wow. Grenades.

That was sloughed in by Foster at the last second, yes. Welcome back. So, first and foremost, we have our winner of the White Oak Complete Dice Tower from our friends at Wormwood. The winner is G.T. Devoto. G.T. Devoto. De Novi. Congratulations. Denovo will reach out to you and get your contact information. Everyone else, thank you for entering. We'll have more with each

future episode of Critical Role. Thanks to our friends of Warming Gaming. Also as a heads up for those who weren't familiar and those who may be, we have a Tuesday kind of after show this called Talks Machina where our friend W. W. Brian Foster Esquire, just mixing up all of his names. The third. As you guys know, Brian to B. Foster, a fantastic friend of the show, is the host of the show and he'll be there Tuesday to talk about this episode tonight with some of the cast. He's over to the same right now staring at a good time. 7 p.m. Pacific time on two days.

Watching the good place. So, anyway. Two minutes. Please, please. Bring your ass back? Oh, wow. Bring that ass back. Bring that ass back.

Oh, bring that out. Five dragons swoop down. He's already so hackneyed. As you guys begin to approach the outside of this large, dark navy tent, People are being inspected and ushered through by the well-groomed half-fork on one side and the pale woman, Yasha, who you met for a second time approaching the outskirts of this carnival, with entry vies being collected by both as people begin to pass into this large structure.

A few feet off to the side, you see a small crowd gathered around Mollymok, who is sitting atop a small blanket and has cards played before him, a similar set that you saw Jester Toeing with earlier, and a farmer sits across from him listening intently. All right, so, um, what can you tell me about this year cough? How long have you had it? Oh, going on like three, four months? It looks like he's getting better.

Oh yes, does it feel like he's getting better? Oh, right, right now, yeah, I did. Yeah, look at that. I would, I would maybe a... Maybe a breathe a tincture or something. Let's... Yeah, maybe you should get that look at. What's that?

Right, right, from who? What do the court's tell me? Some sort of physician, perhaps? Right, of course. Oh, oh, thank you, thank you so much. Any places a platinum dragon be with you think. Stends up. Oh, dear, a physician, and he walks off.

Give him a strength. What happens to... He's amazing. No sick people. This is outside the tent. He doesn't enter the tent. He goes off the side. Fair. That's good to see you all here, though.

Here's the thing. You know, some of us have weapons that we don't want to pass away to other people. So how much of a chance is it that we could get through without having to do that, you know? Well, you can't see the show if you have a weapon on you. Right, and we really want to see the show. But you know, we are really good at security. Like all of us are really strong, and we could fight things that came up too. So maybe it would be best if you don't take our weapons and then we can help.

Actually, here's a deal. We'll make you a good deal. You waive our entry fee, and if anyone needs to be kicked out or any security needs to happen, we'll help you out. help you out. Like deputy bounces. Like deputy bounces. Well see the funny thing about that though is that's my job. Sure I'm not just counting. Do you want to hire us? No. You would be like our boss. You know, have you ever wanted to be a boss like in charge? We could ask you for like days off sometimes. A heavy kind of greenish gray skin mitt slaps onto Beau's shoulder as you glance over to see the large well-groomed half

Fort Mann sending their room. I'm terribly sorry, but we've got to take in care of. If you wish to pay entry, you can. But the rules are the rules, so sorry. Do they get stored in some sort of locker or something? I hold them. You hold them. And if you want, I can stand right next to you guys.

You keep your eye on me the whole time. She's very trustworthy. That seems fairish to me. Yesha, does that seem... All right. Thanks, Bob. I'm going to go as I take his hand off. What's your name? By the bye.

Bo. What? Good name. Thank you. Well, that's funny because your name is also Bo. Really? You didn't have to, like, that like I, maybe let me choose when to tell people. No, no, I'm curious about this.

How do you spell your name? Oh, well, it's short, it's short for Bo regards. Oh, mine's just B-O. Done. That's unfortunate. I mean, it's great. Did kids make fun? Never mind.

It's not inaccurate. He kind of flicks the side of his mustache. Gross. Yeah. Like, is his mustache especially B-O-y? Like what? That's really gross. Make a perception check.

Ew. I don't want to perceive this. Good. I'm glad I didn't roll very well. Can I make an inside check? Is he like a creep or is he? Take an inside check. Okay.

Eight. Thankfully, you're not in proximity enough to get your whiff of his mustache. You know he's using like, C-LIN-L-WARD. Okay. Interestingly enough, he seems very well put together, and he seems like he's just fucking with you. He's having fun and he's messing with you, and he's just casual and incompetent and actually pretty well groomed. He doesn't smell, and he seems more just enjoying the

discourse. It's funny, see, my name's Beau because my parents wanted a son. Well, if it helps with a near the confusion, call me the breaker. Oh. Oh. Well, if you see the rest of the show, perhaps you'll see why I got my name. He kind of cracks his arms. I am.

Towards me. I was in the show. Really? No, I'll see the show. Well, then, pay up. You see now the crowd's starting to like, like queue up behind you pretty heavily. And he's like, besides, if you're going to enter,

we gotta get to the rest of this riffraff. Do you wish to join in? Well. I pull, all I have is a dagger, but I just hand it to this yasha. Just one dagger? Okay. I promise you, I will give it back.

I haven't made for more. Yes, here good. I promise you I will give you all of your weapons back. Sure. All right. Pink you swear to me, Yasha. I don't like. Yeah.

Now we're best friends. Okay. Here's my sickle. I have a staff, but I also kind of use it as a walking stick, so I'd really like to keep it on me. Can you not walk without it or something? She has a really bad limp. I just, you know, sometimes I get like a little twinge, like a little disc issue. Can you have me your staff so I can watch this.

I want to see this limp of yours. Purely for my own entertainment. Are you patronizing me, Mollymok? No, I'm hoping that you're going to patronize us. Can I keep my stick? Can I keep my stick? How about this? I'll take it and I can just carry you to your seat.

How are you carrying all of these weapons? Because I'm really fucking strong. You, can I give him a pat down? Because you're, you... Sure, roll an investigation check. I'll give you an advantage because you're really good at this. I open up the coat just so I can you should be books. I think I find anything.

Well, two books. 12. Yeah. You find two books and a modicum of change and nothing else on him. He's actually pretty sparse as far as collectibles and keepsakes. I just thought your chest looked rather square, so I wanted to see. I wanted to see what was happening. Practically, concave. Is it concave or convex, I forget?

Concaid. Concaid. Concaid. Convex would be funny. Oh. I'll hand her my short sword, but not my little crossbow. Make a slight a hand check to try and hide that. Four. Oh, wait, 12. We have advantage on that technically, right? This is dexterity checks?

Well, did you give me dexterity or just stealth? How does that work? I think it's just stealth checks with a blessing. Let me double check that real fast. We're going to the book. Going to the book! What in the heck? This is, we're playing first edition, right? No, it is stealth, you were correct.

Yeah, it's just self-checks. Sorry, sorry. Sorry, I wish I wouldn't have said it and then you could have had advantage just then. But I'm not a cheater. No, you're not. Sorry about that. So yeah. Out of the game.

You see him. and slowly pocketing this crossbow. No, no, no, no. Little girl. I'm just a little girl. Give me your other weapon. This is a toy for little children. All right, here.

I'm sorry. Are you keeping track of who goes what goes with what person? Because it's a lot. She's very good at this. I'm very good. I just drag not like five feet over. That is two strikes against you. I think we should really just sort of enjoy the show tonight.

All right. someone attacks us. Well, I will handle that for you, okay? All right. Also, little girls don't tend to tell people they're little girls. This is my first time. When someone is a goblin in the middle of a town of people who hate goblins. Stop saying the word goblin.

People are going to hear you. I mean, she's kind of right about it. We can hear it right now. Technically, I dragged her away. No, D&D is funny with what is known and not. I heard you over the earring. All right. Alright, P.

Wait, I didn't get your weapon in. Do you want to stare at me all day, or do you want to give me the weapons so you can go watch the show? It's an interesting choice. It's not really a choice. Sure. What do you pull out? My falchin.

Your what? A falchin, a large curved, curved sword emerges from a sheath on his back. What is that? A large curved sword. Oh. I twist it around a little. I'll play with it.

They'll hurt yourself. I won't. Very nice. I like it. It's a falchip. You're going to hang out with us the whole night. I don't hang out beside you so you can watch. Make perception check.

Eleven. That's enough. As she spins the falchon around, do you notice that affixed to her back in uncharacteristically clean leather towards the rest of her outfit what appears to be a slung over sheath and a very large, plated weapon, larger than your falchion affixed to her back. I just like how everyone says falchion. It's very... It's a word, isn't it?

It's pronounced felching. I'm going to pick up my cards in a very specific order very quickly and start stacking the deck. Okay. All right, well, if you want to follow me, I'll take you to your seats and I'll stand beside you the whole time. I thought you can lead the way. Hey, Chester, before you go.

Yes. We're Tiefling to Tiefling, and thank you for keeping this rabble in check. Of course, you know, there are a lot to handle, but... One on the house, and I pull two cards. What are you telling me? And I pull the moon, and I pull the shadow. Mm-hmm. Does this mean anything to you?

Yes. Well, think about it. Put it away. It's a foster. All rushed. Oh, Bo. Both are in the half-work turn to you. We're a little one. We're trying to.

I just go over and I fireman style over my shoulder. That's what I carry. Since you can't walk. Oh. Oh. Just carries her right. And I just, I turn back to them and to the rest of them. such grace, such form, such dignity.

The birds are out already. The other Bo, Bo the breaker, goes ahead and collects five copper from each of you as you pass through. So mark off five copper from your, except for the two of you guys are part of the band. If I skip around, can I be part of the show and then I don't have to pay? Weirdly being part of the show means you have to strangely pay more. I'm not entirely sure how that works. Not for you have type of cover. Ah, for you, Caleb, I do.

No, I'm not asking, I was going to help you, but if you have it, you're good. No, you've been spotting you all day. I'll take care of both of us. Okay. That just as adorable. I know. Hardly entertained.

I like her. I do, too. So stepping in to the interior of the tent, the rocky floor filled with grass, dirt and various just flattened groundscape on the outskirts of the Eustelok. You can see a thick, heavy tarp-like material hitting the very edge where the heavy dark blue cloth hangs from the sides of the tent within. You can see where the seating is guided across the floor. And there already in a very packed room, you see a few dozen townsfolk that have began to gather

in a semicircle. There is the entrance flap of the tent where you guys are walking in. As soon as you walk in, you can see a central pillar, a heavy column of wood, a tree that has been completely rounded off on all sides, held a loft to carry the top of the canopy of the tent itself. And across the way, you can see a larger flap tent that is currently closed that appears to be probably the performers entrance. You can see above you four hanging lanterns that kind of glow with seems like a flicker of light, but the pattern to them is consistent, meaning it's not probably natural flame. Children and people are beginning to mash around the sides,

and the space all on the edges of the interior of this tent, starting to get a little cramped. Where do you guide them, Yasha? Does you guys want to sit in the front row? Yes. That's what we were told is the best in the house. Yeah. You should set the front row.

So there's, like, if you consider a semicircle pattern here, if you're entering, you can go front to the right front to the left, front of the center, and anywhere in between. Where would you like to be currently sitting? Front and center? Or do you want to be on the sides? Front and center! Take him to the front center. Front and center, okay. I'm going to keep my hand on my meager purse for the evening. Okay.

As soon as I sit down, I'm going to pull out my sketchbook and draw the moon and the shadow card that Molly showed me too. Okay. Moon shadow. The shadow. As we're walking over. I see, hey Yasha, because I was kind of totally on your shoulder. I heard you talking about my friend, Jester. Ash.

Yeah. I didn't mean anything by it, I just... No, dude. No, no, no. She's never mentioned a significant other, so, I mean... Oh, I'm... I'm not... I'm not looking for anything. I just... Will you hold me through the show?

Kind of cradle me? I think, I mean, that's a nice. extra charge, we do do that though. How much? Well, it's an extra five gold pieces. Gold? Five gold? These arms are worth a lot. It's a very swaddling hug. You've never experienced anything like it. It's going to be the best, it's the best way to see the show if that's how you want it. I'll give you a five silver just to have your shrug to sit on so my butt's not on the floor. I don't take off my shrug.

Oh, sorry. How about you just keep your money and I'll put you in a chair and I'll just watch over your weapons? Okay. Okay. So she places you on the ground. Is there no chairs the whole tier? On the ground, I mean, because there's no chairs. Oh, there's no chairs?

No, it's open floor. I was picturing the benches. That's okay. There's no, fuck. Where are they going to transport benches from place to place? Yeah, no. That's a good point. That's a good point.

Rolls-legged on the round of this. Worthful a carnival? I don't know. Yeah. Well, sorry, you have a fletching and moon dropped to deal with. Bring a cushion from home like a regular person. So as the music has died down and everyone begins to kind of crowd and whisper to themselves, eventually begins to quiet a bit, everyone having their seats. The familiar sound of the fiddle begins to play, and everyone quickly gets quiet, begins to come to a hush. The music

seems sourceless in the interior of the tent. Everyone begins to look around to see where it may come from. You see your points of hushed books pointing off in different areas, and at the top of the tent you see, seeming to stretch and fall, like a slow drop of water. The man in red you saw earlier descends from the top of the tent, but now dressed head to toe in a matching deep blue outfit and full makeup to where he just sort of appears out of the canopy of the tent. He hangs from a rope by one foot. It's wrapped around and kind of clutched as his foot catches the edge, playing his violin ever so slowly as he carefully

carefully descends, and then the last moment releases the rope and ends on his feet, continuing the music he's playing. He slowly spins as the longer-haired elf leader of the earlier parade that you saw, the one that had barked back briefly to your two new friends over here, enters the tent from the distant flaps the performer's entrance. His head now sporting that same tall hat, flopping backwards at the apex. He extends his arms, removing the hat and takes a deep bow as the crowd begins to clap. Ladies and gentlemen of Trostenwald, I am Carnival Master Gustav Fletch. And allow me to welcome you to the Fletching and Moondrops traveling Carnival of Curiosity.

I ask you each and every one of you. Here's some children giggle as he kind of makes eye contact. your imaginations this eve, but a trifle bit of time, and allow us to reveal a realm of laughter, mystery, danger, beauty. I see you've already met Desmond. Any gestures towards the man in all blue who's playing the fiddle? You'll be part of our story tonight. So keep a wily eye for the shifting fool.

But first, I tell you a tale, of two sisters of the Faye, as Desmond slowly leaves the tent. You see two armored guards by where he is now have entered to the Crown's Guard, of kind of stepping by the entrance where you walked in and kind of watch him pass. Lost without form into the mazes of the underworld.

There where the body would break, they found a teacher in a mystical circle. and the gift they received was the ability to bend with this maze that capture them and slither their way back to the surface, to reclaim their place in the world. May I present to you, Mona and Yuley, the Not Sisters. As he slowly backs through the performers' entrance,

the two halfling dancers you saw earlier, in the full-body suits, emerge from behind the carnival master as he discreetly exits. They sport serpentine makeup, scales affixed to the sides of their face and arms, approaching the central spire, the pole that holds the tent up.

One immediately leaps under the shoulders of the other, bending her back a near impossible amount, creating this humanoid sculpture that you see the front row, kind of cringe at the idea of the pain that would cause an average individual. But these half of the women are very nimble and able to create almost a single form out of two bodies. Their rigid form becomes fluid to the eyes. They move and shift the music. The violin now sourseless once again, not seeing where this Desmond is placed, but they seem to move as it picks up speed.

I was expecting more wringling brothers, actually. Suddenly, the top one folds over and slams into the ground, tumbling across the center, in a wild display of physical control. The two of them begin to tangle and wrap like two battling snakes, their bodies seemingly disconnecting from the rigid, halfling forms you had seen, and you swear for a moment becoming serpentine-like as they intertwine around the base of this pole. It's beautiful and violent at the same time. It's off-putting. And watch as they curl around the the base of this pole. The lights above begin to become a dull greenish blue, and to get darker and darker, presenting this imagery of the underworld. One by want, they silently tell a tale of struggle, crawling across one and the other, one at a time, using their serpentine-like

forms as is the extending ladder, folding over each other, as they use every muscle in their body to cling around this pull and ladder step up like a snake. It's a very strange but a luring sight, and you can't help but notice that you forget that these are two halfling girls, and you find yourself pulled into this wordless story they tell of climbing back to their place to the surface towards the dark sky of lightless blue cloth, As the bibles that contain the interior light of the tent begin to glow brighter. In brighter, they're climbing become more fevered. The two of them, arm into arm, leg into leg, rolling up and swirling until eventually at the apex,

they grab each other's arms around the pole before spinning downward, back to back, legs outward with a rapid pace, the music coming to a full crescendo. Like a maypole, they both curl and twirl and then tumble to the ground, but then tumble to the ground, before the audience with a flourish, arms in the air, and the audience erupts an applause. As they both begin to back away with smiles in their faces, nodding to each other, Gustav emerges once more from the performer's flap.

The fool appears at the back entrance again, taking an ominous tune with his violin this time. His outfit no longer blue but deep, set, black. The hanging lights darken once again as Gustav takes the center stage, In a flash beyond the ash, the gods all went and gone. The darkness came to grasp, reclaim, and suffocate the dawn. Suddenly, out of the darkness behind him, a burst of flame, lights the room.

But from that night a burning light doth keep back shadows bane. The strength to fight will set her light, the morning sun again. Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you, Orna the Fire Fairy, and Gustav leaves the tent once more. As you watch, a pair of metallic fans, a light with flame and now framed the beautiful woman of short red hair you had seen before in the procession. Gustav slinks into the darkness and vanishes as Orna spins in hypnotic twirl. Her simple dress of golds and reds, almost glowing in the firelight around her, the flickering of the flames, giving her the visage of a warrior goddess battling the dark that surrounds. The frenzied fiddle of the

fool picks up as she twirls the fans in her grasp, her face stoic and graceful simultaneously. The hush awe of the audience fills the air, watching this magnificent warrior strike at the shadows. The lights above flickering brighter with each spin and dive, banishing the shadows from the room. She matches the pace of the music, drawing to a crescendo in leaps and barrel turns that climaxes with a striking a powerful pose as a lights rocket to a victorious luminescence. Once again, the crowd goes crazy. Look, there are a lot of celebrity interview podcasts out there, but there's only one happy, sad, confused.

I'm Josh Horowitz, and yeah, I'm the host of the show, so I'm a little biased, but truly happy, sad, confused is the place for nerdy and intimate conversations with all your favorite actors and filmmakers. from Andrew Garfield and Scarlet Johansson to Christopher Nolan casting what ifs, backstage stories, and much more. Listen to HappySac and Confused on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.

You know that feeling when you hear one interesting thing and suddenly you want to know more. Well, that's the idea behind my podcast, something you should know. Every episode starts with a question you've probably never thought to ask, like why people do or don't like you, why certain habits stick, or what everyday advice is actually wrong. I'm Mike Rothers, and I talk with scientists, authors, and experts, and I keep it practical, surprising, and fun to listen to.

If you've got a curious brain, come try one episode of something you should know on the podcast app you're listening to right now. It's very artistic. We get that. Gustav enters as she exits with a bow, the fans flickering out. He enters clapping at Orna. A low drumbeat begins to beat in the distance as the fiddle grows tense once more. Even as the sun would rise anew, bellowing roars will quake the lands of Jorhas and beyond. Terrible beasts now freed from their dark masters. scattered into our world. A terrible guttural roar shakes the room,

followed by the sound of grinding and dragged chains. From behind the performer's flap, the half fork bow, who you had met earlier, the breaker, and the fool who is now still playing the fiddle, yet the bow of it continues to go on its own as he drags the other chain with his arm wrapped around his forearm. The two of them pull something through the flap. It swells, and from beneath it is revealed an enormous creature of green, scaled, slimy-looking

skin and a corpulent form, large, toad-like legs, frame a rotund torso, and muscular arms that are manacled and pulling him in. It fights and struggles against the taut chains as he's pulled further and further towards the center of the tent. is held in place by the two men. It roars the second time, the front row, immediately pulling back and screaming, you hear kids begin to cry. A handful of townsfolk shoot to their feet, grasping the children in fear, preparing to run. Have we ever seen anything like this before?

Yeah, what's it looked like. Well, he just described what it looks like. You don't. By name. It's corpulent, frogland. You have not, you have not seen this creature before. Okay. Gustav continues, seemingly unflinched by its The devil toad crawls hungry.

Okay. But what does it look like? Into the land of the free folk, lording over nightmares as they say, and what truth lies behind the eyes of this beast? What would be learned when the guiding heart of innocence pierces the hateful soul and brings it to see beauty for the first time?

I present to you the vivid voice of Toya. And as Gustav backs away, the devil-toed, struggling against the chains, a soft, faint voice begins to slowly emanate from the air. That's not right. I don't want to shoot you. Eyes previously locked on the frightening creature,

now seek a source and find atop a platform. within the chamber, high up on a small platform set against the apex of the pole. A young, dwarven girl, maybe 12 years of age. Her braided golden hair clasped in her hands at her side, a white dress obscuring her feet. She sings with a mystifying, mature voice that pierces your heart with joy.

with joy unexpectedly and uncontrollably. The crowd audibly gasps as one, the entrancing song of this girl, bringing every person into this music. The devil toad stops struggling against the chains, seemingly caught by the sound of her voice. Its face drops into a soft smile as it slowly walks toward the base of the pole

and sits. The half-work in the full day. drop the chains and back away, leaving the beast free in this rapture. Her voice almost begins to summon a chorus from the ether, nearly magical in nature, as there are no others but her joining into this piece. Her smile is infectious, and you can't tear your eyes away. You only now realize the tears down your cheeks, but you cannot break your gaze. From the front row of the audience on the left, a man stands up, his arms outstretched towards her. His dirty cloak falls away, his face and skin wracked with age, and you see his legs shaking

as he stands. His cheeks went with tears. He shouts, ah! His arms drop and clutch his chest. Gurgles a burst of vocal pain once more, and the folks nearest to him begin to lean away as he begins to shake. You glance over as the old man yells out once more, as the skin in his arm suddenly begin to tear. The bones splitting from the flesh, writhing, cracking. Dust and blood shake from his wounds as his form swells, screams, begin to ring out from the audience around him,

people rising up and running for the exit. Chaos breaks into the room around you. Toya's song abruptly ends. The little girl looking down with frightful. in her eyes, the Devil Toad glancing about worriedly, the Half Ork and the Fool, rushing up beside him to look at the transforming man. The Half Ork yells, escorting patrons to the exit, Everyone! Leave the tent! Now! Kyle Rhee! As he points to the Devil Toad, get her to safety! The Devil Toad glances up and leaps with a sudden gust of strength to the top and grabs the

center pull of the room as it begins to almost quiver to his weight. He grabs the little girl safely under his arm and leaps back down. What are you all doing? I invoke duplicity. You watch, as her form suddenly dissipates into multiple seemingly copies of her form of gesture. Yasha, we're gonna need those weapons back. I turn to Molly Mark. Man, I was, man, I thought it was kind of lame at first, but this is awesome.

Not part of the show. This isn't part of the show? This is it really good. It's why all the people are looking at show, do they always turn into watch this? It's too arsees. It's too arcy. Yeah. Weapons, yes.

The old man's body stops quaking, his flesh now gray and mangled like an ancient tree trunk. He turns, his eyes blood red and bulging, his lips curled into a horrifying grimace. The two crownscar begin to try and make their way through the panic crowd, but the people, like a wave of chaos are keeping them at bay. I need everyone to roll in this show. The miniatures come out, guys. Oh, first! The natural one.

Oh, yes. Yes. That both well. So you guys, this guy is actually over here. You guys are all up here in the front. Oh yeah, we were right in the fucking front, bro. Oh, my God. Look you guys, we're so cute.

Oh my god. So pretty. We're all gonna die. Probably. But then the third campaign begins. Yay. Okay, okay, okay. I like the tents and donkeys outside.

Amazing. Oh, look, how it's a bardo. I love a little bardo. Oh, my God. Oh, no, go for it. Oh, yeah, no. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, boy.

Oh, my gosh. All right, so 20 to 15. 21. Oh, right. Oh, wait, 22. Nice. 15 to 10. 10.

10. 12. 13. Oh, wow. Eleven. Hold on. Hold on. And then so, 13 and 10 and 10?

Me 10. Oh, 12. So you actually got 13. Then we have Ford. And then 11. And then we have not. 10 for not the brain. 10.

And what did you get? Five. All right. We rolled terribly. Oh, up there right here. There we go. Okay. So, top of the round, as this creature turns and kind of lairs about in the area, this swollen

form over here to the side, that's what remains of the old man who had stood up from the center of the chamber. Jester, you're up first. Who's fighting? Okay. Well, I'm just going to go for it, all right? I'm going to cast guiding bolt on the monster that just appeared. Okay, as it turns towards you, it's a saving for it, correct? Let's find out. A flash of light streaks, you make a range spell attack. Oh, it's range spell attacks. Go and roll for attack on that, please. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay.

Magic, you're using magic. Oh, well it's cocked. It was 20 and then it rolls. It's cocked, yeah. You said, come. You're cock. That's 11 plus, what do I add to my guiding bolt plus five, so 16. 16 hits, go and roll damage. Yes.

Four D6. Yasha, you're almost on deck, so you're going to be there. Okay. 10, 16, 18. 18, and then any attacks in the future have, and the next attack has advantage. How much damage was that? It was 2D6, 18? 18 damage. 4D6, she said. Yeah, it was 4D6, radiant damage. So yeah, it was 18. Oh, ready?

I don't think Frog and Dwarfroll are bad. And then I'm going to, I'm going to run the opposite direction away from him, but I'm going to keep my duplicate up there. Okay, which for your duplicate? I should go ahead and grab some. Oh, you've got toys. Whoa. What's in the bag? That backpack's almost as big as my dice bag.

Almost. I was like, oh, that's right, you can do this, so I need to pull out. Let's say for the purposes of this, your, there we'll pull you. Oh my god, did you actually do this? This will do your duplicate. Okay. Wherever you want to move it from where you are. Okay.

So she's going to stay here. Oh my. I can't reach that far, but. Oh, shit, sorry. Let me know where. There. There. Sorry, sorry.

I didn't realize it was like. You can get there as the closest. Okay, that sounds good. Okay, so it ends your turn. At the top of your turn, this creature closest to one of the people nearby screaming, this young woman who's trying to back away. If she just turns toward her and, grabs and tries to tear into her with two strikes.

Whoa. The first one that is actually gonna miss. She ducks out of the way and begins crawling across the ground as it goes for a second attack. That, however, does hit. That's a 16. That'll do it. So with eight points of bludgeoning damage,

it reaches down and slams its fist into her chest. And as it does, she kind of gives out this horrible yelp as it kind of rips into her and begins gnawing into her flesh and pulls away with a mouthful of her chest. with a mouthful of it and stands up, its eyes now scanning the room for the next possible victim. It's going to begin to stop forward. Coming up to that guy.

All right, Yasha, your turn. How close am I to them? I want to give other weapons. You're pretty close to everybody. You could distribute with, you could use your action to toss your weapons out to everybody this turn, I'll say. Okay. Or I'll pass my weapons out for this turn.

Okay. kind of throwing them out to the individual. So your short sword and crossbow kind of clatter to the ground and you quickly scramble to grab them. Caleb's dagger falls at his foot. Your staff gets tossed quickly from behind you. Your falchion meets your arm. Fouchin. Fouchin. All right. That ends Yasha's turn. Ford, you're up. Can I run up with the Fouchin within melee? You actually walk through. Break your lock. That's a fountain. You rush through Jester's form. You watch the kind of image

dissipate as you kind of charge through it and meet up right face to face with this large kind of gnarled, horrible-looking creature. What are you doing? We're being the fountain. Can I swing into the creature? You may. Okay. You're good. And you get advantage. I do? Because I had... She's got any hole. Yeah. Thank God, because that was one. No.

Uh, 18. 18 hits. Good and roll damage. Nice. It's a real fight! Yeah. Oh, man. 11. 11 points of damage?

We shot like a dozen hit points. We'll be okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We're doing three. All right, that ends your turn. That's it. All right, you're done. That brings us to Caleb.

I would like to use my movement to push as far into the crowd as I can. Okay, going through the crowd is... Half movement. It's half movement and is considered... Sure. I just want people in front of me. You push through to about there. You end up pushing a kid out of the way.

That's great. That's exactly fine with me, and I will pull out the diamond and cast chromatic orb. What? I will send a ball of cold at the creature that fjord. All right, yeah, go ahead and make a spell attack. Yes, here it comes. Watch out for fjord! Oh, my goodness.

That is a 17. 17 hits, go and roll damage. Go and roll the image. Is it chromatic orb like a really strong spell? No. There's like chromatic spray. Prismatic spray. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Chromatic is like the starry. That is nine. Nine. Nine of colts. Nine. Nine, nine. Nine, nine, okay. All right, it's very much time.

Colts the image, yeah. Now is the part where we dance. So as you turn, as you push the child of the way, turn, putting your, your pocketed diamond out in front of you, you focus and you watch as this beam of light blue energy streaks past just barely coasting between a few heads as it slams into this creature, as crystals can form where the wounded impact was. It cracks back into place where it was. And if you turn? That's good. I'm great.

All right, knot, you're up. Okay, having seen the beautiful Dwarven girl, was it? Yeah. Who sang and soothed a monster earlier in the show. I'm going to attempt to sing and soothe this monster. Okay. So I stepped forward. I step forward and I open my mouth and I say,

Hand on. Can I shoot an arrow at? He's killing the memory of Scandum. Can't let that go. Make a performance check. Performance check. No, it's really good. 18 minus three, so that's 15.

Okay, as you're singing out this discordant sound, nearby folks are covering their ears and glancing back and looking at surprise, at this strange creature giving off this... Does it not? No, however, it's now ever taking a few hits nearby, its red eyes, or at least one red eye, like, slips over to look in your direction. That's as much of an effect.

Fuck! Do you want to move or are you going to stay there? Yes, I'm going to move, and I'm going to dash behind somebody in the crowd, some weak-looking individual. Okay. You're going to get behind the there. Yes, that sounds good. All right.

Alright, baby! Boom, you're up. Oh shit, okay. To kind of like RP my tragic one on the first fucking battle, all of it, I'm just gonna kind of turn to everybody and go, yeah, no guys, it's part of the show. Molly said that like people will die, like she was just a clack. Okay, and then I run and I'm gonna kind of like tackle the zombie guy. Okay. Can I see if I can grapple him? You can certainly on the first attack. Go for it. Go ahead and make an acrobatics, or athletics check, sorry. Just straight athletics.

Yes. Oh God, do I keep that? Yeah. Yeah. It's not good. Seven. Level two. 17. You tend to your first strike, and the creature just breaks away. Its strength is far more than you imagine it would be from what was originally, a very kind of elderly-looking frame.

I go... I go, oh, fuck that, I don't know if that's true. And I'm gonna do Flurry Blows. Yeah. Pop, pop. That's unarmed, right? Correct. Pop pop.

That is correct, and I believe. Right? I do two, okay. Yes, for using your key point to do that, yes. Yes, I am. So first one, it's plus six, okay, first one's 19? No, 20, first one's 20 total, and then the second one is 15 total. with it, low damage for each.

Oh, tame. Not great. Not great. Not great. Their D-4s are just like fancy D-4s, yeah. That is four, eight, 11 points of damage. Pop-up. Between both?

Yep. Great. So after the grapple fails and it pushes you away, you go ahead and pull back and then leap, kick it in the chest, and then uppercut it in the chin. Yeah, that's cool. That's cool. That looks back towards you. towards you. So that would be putting you up base to base with it there. All right.

Ending your turn? Yeah. Okay, at that point the crowd is now screaming and begins to swell and push in this direction. These folks all begin to run back and around this way. This crowd begins to push. The guards are trying to push forward, and they can only get a little ways forward to there and there. Everyone just shifts out this direction. Oh, God, somebody's going to get trampled.

It's really a hazard. They should have had more exits. I mean it's a fire hazard. Caleb and not, I need you both to make dexterity saving throws. Ooh, real well. Is that the nine? 15. Oh, pretty good. That's 17 for me. All right. You've both managed to just bob and weave through the crowd to prevent being trampled and kind of backing away from the chaos as people are pushing through. The entrance is too small for everyone to leave, and there's a little bit of people to leave, and there's a lot. now a giant bottleneck that's beginning to push up as people are now screaming and trying

to get out. They're crying and the chaos is just swelling into this absolute cacophony. As soon as that finishes, the deviltoed carrying the Dwarven girl who was given a decree, exits out the back with her to get her to safety, these two begin slowly back away, seeing that at least things seem to be handled, and the guards making its way and are like looking to scared at each other and not really knowing what to make of the current chaos. At that point, you watch as the woman whose chest was torn into by this creature, suddenly snaps up into place. Oh, shit.

Oh, okay, we have to keep them from being dead. Okay. Oh, no. Top of the round, jester you're up. Oh, God. Okay, okay, okay, okay. Sorry, no. Molly.

What was your interest to begin? Ten. Ten, oh, shit. Ten. That's right, yours not. That's what happened. Yeah, that's all right. So Molly, you go ahead and go your turn as well.

My apologies. I'm going to yell at the back. Open the tent wide. And I'm going to pull. How far away am I? You're right there. You're like, in the middle of the crowd, is it swarming around you and Yasha?

At the box. Ah. I'm going to run around and see if I can flank that creature, if I can move towards flanking that creature with the other two. 15, 20, 25, 30. You can't really flank it, but you can get next to it. All right, can I get close enough to take a shot? You can't, yeah. Take a shot.

You have a gun? Well, old habit. Take a, old habit. Oh, I'll have it. What you do, Molly? As a bonus, I'm flipping it out, and I'm going to activate the first sword. Okay, so you watch his Mollie pulls the cemetery out and kind of, as he unsheeds it, draws it across the side of his exposed chest, causing a little bit of blood to kind of spill out. And as it does, he pulls the blade out, and you watches the edge, suddenly, f f f f f f f f f f, and he pulls. ice crystals begin to build on the outside of the blade.

And I'm taking a shot at the creature. Taking a slice. Taking a slice. Taking a slice. Taking a stab. A stab. But with bullets. Oh yeah.

That's good one. That's a good one. It hits. All right. That's not bad. That's eight points of damage and one point of ice damage. So nine points of damage in the first strike? No, that was my point.

That's fine. That's all you got. Okay, so one strike you just cut across and you watch as you cut this wide wound open and kind of exposing the fleshy organs interior, but they're frozen where the wound cut through and it's still holding it together. It's looking like it's starting to hurt a bit and fall apart slightly. That's the bigger monster? So what I'm finding?

Yes. All right. So that ends your turn moment. Brings us to the top. So Jester, sorry, back to you. Jester. Oh no, now I'm worried. Just do it.

Just do it. Do it. I'm worried about undead. No one's watching. I'm dead. I don't know. Well, I don't think I would know this, so it's okay. I'm going to say to the air and say,

Dude, are you here? And then I'm going to cast Toll the dead on the first zombie creature guy. And there's a bell that tolls around it. Oh, toad the dead. Toll the dead. Yeah, it's really cool. It's fucking rat.

Oh, no. He has to make a wisdom saving throw or take one D12 necrotic damage. Which is what I think is a natural one. Whoa! Go ahead and roll the D12. Get them. Oh, three. That's the lame.

Yeah. That points to necrotic damage. So as this suddenly, this deep kind of temple bell, boom, rings out in the air above you watches this creature who has turn and is beginning to just wail upon the surrounding running allies that are curling at its sides. It kind of seems to retract from the sound and cover its ears briefly before anger they begin lashing out. And I made that sound like it was coming from my duplicate.

Correct. And my duplicate's going to run back a little bit and stand next to the pole. There? Yeah. Okay. Cool. Is that your turn? Yes. All right. The standing creature that That's now been kind of sliced, bludgeoned, and wounded by all three of you. It's going to go ahead and make two strikes at... I'm going to roll randomly to see who it goes for you. That's going to be at Beauregard. It swings at you twice, both of its giant massive clogged fists just kind of striking out towards you.

The first one is 17 to hit. My armor class of 17? That's it. Huge. Yeah. Nine points of bludgeoning and damage. Let's first one just, wham! Slams you in the chest, you feel the wind knocked out of you for a brief second.

The second swing is going to come at you. That is going to be a 20 to hit. Yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, that hits. Swing to swing it hard. That's going to be six points of bludginging damage to you. Oh, that's rough. What you went out, girl? Don't worry about it.

I'm bad. I'm bad. After it slams into you once with the fist and the other one grabs into your stomach abdomen region. claws kind of dig in, and its jaw unhinges and slightly drops like a snake's. I turn it forward and I go, I'm not a clack. This shows bullshit. The other one is going to rush forward towards you, Malimak, as you're the closest one to it, and it's going to take one swing at you?

Yeah, no. What do you know? I'm going to use blood maledict. Okay. So, yeah. Maladyx. Okay. reaction.

Yeah, I'm using my reaction. We don't have to roll anything before. He just has disadvantage on the strike. Oh, that's right, because I'm not doubling it up. That'll do it. He rolled a 16 and then a 4. Yep. Never mind.

So as it swings towards you, you watch as suddenly the reddish burning eyes of the second creature go black, and it goes way too white and misses you. You easily duck out of the way with its first strike. As it runs past towards you this way, you get an attack opportunity as it leaves your attack range to attempt to swing around Molly. Just swing around Molly for a second strike. Go for it. That is 16. 16 hits, go to all damage.

Nice. Yes, sir. Hit your mark. It's 12 points of damage. 12 points of damage. With that, you, with this brief opening as it rushes past Molly Mock, after its eyes go black, you watch as it kind of stumbles, its vision ruined. With that moment, you swing out with your... Fowchin.

Thank you. I was like, yeah, it's a fowchin, that's right. Fowlion. And strike across the back of its shoulder. You see this one... Once was this kind of beautiful young woman is now this swollen, horrible, undead form, lumbering pass, and you just cut a heavy chunk of meat off of its shoulder. It curbs around and makes a second strike at you, Molle-Mollong. This one without advantage, that's a natural 18.

That puts, yeah, it's a 24 to hit. All right. You take eight points of bludgeoning damage. As the first one you manage to move out of the way, and as you spin your scimitar around, glance over just in time to have it clock you right across the jaw. And your very vision kind of blurs and doubles for a second. That's going to end their turn. Yasha, you're up. All right, Yasha. Come on. Yasha. Yeah.

Beast, beast, beast. Can I get to that? Can I get to the big, big beast? Yes, you can. The big beast? Five, ten, fifteen, twenty, twenty, twenty, five. Perfect. Yeah, through there. Okay, so this is the first time I've done this, so I'm hopefully I won't do this wrong. I'm going to punch.

I would like to rage. Yes! It'll buy something later. No, I like it, I like it. For now it's a placeholder. Okay, so like to rage? When you and reckless attack? Is that something you can do together?

Yeah, you can reticeless attack any of your attacks. You just, you can do right away. Is that something you do later? No. No, you could. Okay. I didn't get a practice shot at this. Okay.

So, okay. So now I just roll. You roll the advantage in your... Yeah! I don't know how to play D&D anymore. I just put out of it. Okay. But roll again to it again.

That's reckless. We could be in a funny. Okay. Uh, 17. That hits. Go to roll damage. Okay. So you pull your giant...

I take out my beautiful great sword. There you go. Freshly purchased. Freshly purchased. In fact, this is the first time it's seen battle. It is the first time that's seen battle. Google reported a weird influx of falchion looks. Ooh, 13.

13. Your team puts on the one that's already been damaged? Yeah. All right. The big, the first guy. Yeah, all right. So that strike. Get the fuck out of my tent!

Oh shit! It was intense. Yeah, no, it does not make this hit. It rolled? It's a big one. Intense. Yeah. So, as you come down with your blade and carve through its body, you watch as it kind of curls back, trying to reform and hold itself, but your blow is too strong.

Your blow is too strong and its zombie-ish form could not maintain a cohesive hole on its form and you watch as it just crumbles to the ground, no longer moving. Yay! Yasha! Yasha! Yasha! Not making this here, okay, okay. Okay, okay.

All right, is that into turn? As you're they're kind of... Arowling animalistically towards the creature. Oh, that feels fun. I think I like. You have about five more feet of movement if you wanted to move. Okay, so I'm gonna go a little bit closer to, wait, how many more are left to them? Just the other one. Just the other one?

Yeah, so I'll get ready for the other one. So a little bit closer to it. Is that a smaller one or not? Yeah, smaller one. Okay. All right, then into your turn, Yasha, the Ford Yard. I'll say, floor. Shit, then I'll turn and head towards other tree zombie.

Fuck. Okay. Yep. I would like to use my bonus action to cast hex on it. Okay. So you watch as Ford kind of lumberes towards his large armored half-out form, holding the blade in his hand, puts his hand out, and the shadows suddenly swirl and gather around this zombie fight woman's form and cling to it, like it's holding it in place. So, with it now hex, what would you like to do? I would like to use my falchion.

To open it the fuck up. up. All right, go for it. Cacom! A twenty-one. That definitely hits. Go and roll damage. The dumb shit we say now makes a t-shirt later.

That's 12 points of damage plus. Five points of necrotic damage. 17 points of damage. Geez. Level two. That's major. So as you rush up after the shadows gather around it looks up to you. Then it pulls it back ready to strike and you just kind of shake your head and one large swipe of your fowlip of your fowlice.

One large swipe of your falcon. and carve this giant mark across its chest. Where the cloth and flesh kind of opens, you can see, this kind of black and interiors. The muscles are trying to move almost like worms to re-gather and tighten. All right, that ends your turn. That brings us to Caleb.

All right, I know that it's restricted movement, but I will push this way through the crowd so that I have a clearer shot as far as I can, and then I will re-up with chromatic orb. You can push right about there. You just barely pull through the crowd to the front to get a clear. I certainly don't want to do that. I want to stay in the crowd behind people and I will do chromatic all again, but this time I'm going to set it to acid. So let's see if we hit.

Oh, that's not good. It's 11. 11, unfortunately, does not. Yeah, shone. That's it. All right, so as you put it a second time, you're pushing through the crowd and you pull up your diamond. Right as you're about to release the spell, one of the people in the crowd like slams into you with their shoulder and you kind of, Dard off the side, the acid bolt of the chromatic orb flies off and actually burns a hole through the distant tent and then vanishes into the night sky. Hope that didn't hit anyone. Alright, that's your turn, Caleb? Not, you're up.

Do I have eyes on the biggie? You do. And is Fjord right next to him or her? Ford and Mollymok are both next to it, yes. Alright, I'm gonna just peek out behind whatever patron I'm next to. Take out my little crossbow and f-do. Just shoot a little shot. Go for it.

Is it made a piano one? 16. 16 hits, go to the limit. Every time you roll it comes out of your... It does. This is very bouncing. Okay, so 1d6, that's a 4 plus 4 is 8. Plus I get sneak attack damage.

You do. Because I'm a rogue. Another 4, so that's 12. Is the creature bigger than me? It is. I will use Fury of the Star. small to inflict another two points of damage on it. So that's 14 points of damage. Okay. As you pull around the corner and release your one crossbow bolt, it hits the bottom

of the chin and pokes out one of the eyes. The eye just goes flying off in the distance as the bolt is now jammed outside of the socket. The creature turns kind of glancing in your direction. It looks pretty hurt, but it's still standing. Fuck. Can I use the rest of my action movement, whatever bonus, to look at the patron I'm with, I'm next to. Do they have any bobbles or jewelry on them? In this moment?

Amazing. You're a good time. I'll say you can use your bonus action to just look. Just look. Just looking. You can do this turn, but next turn you could go on. Do they have any? Make a perception check.

Oh, it's just nine. Nine. It's hard to look. You see this, this, this, uh, what looks to be a late 30s woman, dressed in some sort of a general worker's clothing with like a loose apron, and she's just running and scrambling to make towards the exit. You don't see anything of worth on her, unfortunately. Sorry. All right, nothing to your turn. Molly, you're up. Um, I'm going to, I'm, I'm still engaged with it, right? You are. Okay, I'm just going to take two swipes. Okay, so you spin around. You pull your second scimitar out.

as part of the strike, one of them encased in ice crystals. So the first strike, may make sure you mark which one switch? Purple's, purples the ice. That's, the purple is 12 to hit. 12 just barely hits. Ooh! So they both hit, so that's good. So that's going to be, for all three then, because the other one is 21 to hit. That hits, yeah. That's... What's the first one? The first one is four points of damage. Four points of damage? Four points of damage? I mean, I'm sorry, the magic one is, I'm sorry, six points plus three ice, so nine points. Nine points of damage?

The other one is four points of damage. Okay. The first strike hits, and as the scimitar curves through, the body like snaps and opens and it snaps back into place, the torso kind of locked him back in. The second strike is how much damage? Four points of damage. Four points of damage. Yeah.

The second one hits again and you watch as the torso kind of spins off. Looks like only the spinal column is holding it in place, but it's managing to maintain its structure as it's... That ends your turn? Someone, anyone? Yep. All right, ending the Limeck's turn that brings us to Bo. Bo. You got this.

Come on, Bob! In response to him, I say, I thought you said you didn't let in the sick. Just kill it! She is! And I come up and I want to do like a flying Superman. Yeah! Yeah. Wham!

Go for it. First one. Okay, okay. Okay, 16? Okay. Okay. I have my staff. Oh, I have my staff.

You said you're doing good. You said Superman punch, man. It's fine. It's fine. It's fine. Okay. Six, six damage. Six points of damage.

Six points of damage. Natural 20. It watches you sock it in the face and the jaw kind of breaks and then snaps back into place. As you land, pulling it back, you can see some of the teeth are actually stuck in your fist as you pull back and broken off into your knuckles. I go, oh, come on. I'm going to use my other key point to do flurry blows again. Boop, pooh, boom. Go for it. Too much strikes. And I'm going to try and punch him in the, like, right in the bridge, like with what's his teeth with the remainder of his teeth.

Your teeth, technically. This is the woman that was killed originally. Oh, I'll be like, you were so pretty too. Go for it. Two more strikes. Two more strikes. 19 and 18, natural. Yeah, we'll say those. And then, okay. That's a really pretty nice. I know they're all three.

Eight, twelve, thirteen. Damage. Natural one, no. The first, the second punch, you swing wide and hit the side of the head and the neck kind of snaps, and it's now stuck in a sideways position as it turns. the jaw, it pulls back one of its weirdly swollen clawed hands, ready to go ahead and go for that open wound in your gut. And as it does, how do you want to do this? Oh!

I'll like do the uppercut with the other one and the one that has like its teeth in it. I want to go kind of right in between the bridge of the nose and like get the teeth right in the eyes and kind of just like break the nose bridge kind of into the brain, you know, that thing. Yeah. And as you do that, wham! You slam into its face, you watches the skull caves in, the teeth, piercing both of the red bulging eyes, and with this horrible, sucking, kind of sighing sound, it falls onto its back. No longer moving. The shadows released. I like grabbed my gash and fucked up ribs, and then immediately turn over me. Can

I, like, do a perception check or an inside check on any of the ringleaders, on any of what was going on, the ringleader or the jester? That was your turn, unfortunately. That's your turn. That's fair. Okay, at this point, the current threats are down, and the crowd is just screaming and rushing. The two members of the Crown's Guard are rushed to the front weapons ready, and they see both of these creatures bled and ruined across the base of this. In the midst of the chaos, one of them points out and goes like, you, you, you, stay where

you are! And you watch as the rest of the crowd slowly pushes through, you see as Gustav manages to make his way, and he goes like, Dear God, what's happened here? Looks over towards Bo, the breaker, the half-ork who's now joined the rest of the evening, goes, I, sir, I don't know how I got in here. And everyone kind of looks around back at you. Bo looks to you, Gustav looks at you, Molly. What happened?

One of them turned. I don't know what happened. There was a sick guy. There was an old sick guy and he turned into a zombie. And I run over and I cast scare wounds on, Beau. Oh, thank you, man. I'm a pretty good. Are you sick too?

I would say that. Did you get hurt? I'm a little, I'm bloody... Hold on two seconds, I'm going to cure her and then I'll cure you too. Gosh, have you ever seen anything like this happen before? No. Never. There you go.

No, never. Seven points, that's all I could cure. That's amazing. That's great. And then... I'm gonna drop my sword. Oh, that's better for you, ten for you. Oh, that'll help.

Okay. At this point, the two crowns guard that are there are trying desperately to maintain control. You can see they're visibly shaken, and they have, they look glanced at each other, like, they're a little out of their depths at the moment. It's like, stay where you are. Don't go anywhere. I don't know where, wherever I go. And he turns to the one who's at the front, looks to the other one who just made his way through and goes,

So Vemann, find someone, bring the rest of the guard, please. Right now, sir, and he goes ahead and pushes his way towards the back as the rest of the crowd just runs out. Now everyone in the crowd has mostly pushed out of the 10th. The last few drugs are pushing through. Children crying. People of Trostomol just exiting out the flaps as they close and you're all kind of standing there, weapons in your hands wondering what to do. What are the corpses doing now that they've fallen? They're both unmoving, just ruined, torn apart and just no more. Can I search the corpse of the woman? As you can, as you go to move to it, both of your forms kind of merged. The Crown's God goes like, Don't move. Which one?

Bo. He looks genuinely confused. When I'm going, which one, I make my second form just kind of dart forward and start searching the body. It mimics searching a body. It's not actually you. It begins rifling imaginary things out of the pockets. Look at all this stuff that that one's finding over there. Can you turn and look?

I'm a tired look and I try to search the other guy. Make a deception check to try and deceive him to glance over. Not bad. Oh, 19. Oh, wow. He goes, what over there? Looks over as you jump over quickly and begin kind of searching through it. You guys watch her do this, and there's like a clear line of sight.

As soon as he turns back, he's going to notice her rifling through the other corpse. Is Gustav still in here? Gustav is now walking up, and he's like, hands up in the air and it's like, I am terribly sorry, I... This has never happened, I don't know what happened. What happened? We've never seen anything like you before. He just, he gripped his heart and fell over and turned into that thing. It was when... It was when Toya started singing.

Yeah, what's with the Dwarven Girl? What's why... Nothing like this. No, she's been singing with us for over two years now. How'd she come to you? She's a pretty young girl. She had no family, and she was singing in the street for change, and there was an opportunity. We seized it. We gave her a family she didn't have. Put your hands down. I, I, I, the crown scar goes like, ah, it's fine, just don't move. Did I find anything?

Make an investigation. She uses a different dice for everything, Travis? Shut up! Is that what I'm dealing with now? You're not even ready. Fourteen? 14? So excited.

You managed to... Well, helping. You rifle through the old man's body through the stringing bits of gore. Ew. I found some intestines. And you do find three pieces of silver that are just coated in blood. A few moments pass. The rest of people are gone and it's just this awkward quiet.

And at this point you watch as Orna, the fire fairy who had produced to perform, kind of walks in. He was like, I'm sorry, what has happened to you? Your little dwarf girl was singing and she turns people into zombies. I feel that that was entirely coincidental. I'm really not sure the two things are related. We just had this, something was wrong with this man. See, it's interesting, because I would say the opposite. I would say it wasn't that coincidental because you...

I would agree it seemed to happen with the scene. We've seen her sing. dozens, hundreds of times. Nothing like this has ever happened. I've seen people sit in the front row. Hundreds of times. Nothing like this has ever happened. Have you had the elderly and the sick in these tents before? Yeah, you also happen to be very explicit on your page that you don't want the sick. Good stuff. At this merchant goes, it's generally just because we want to promote a space of

welcoming cleanliness and when we're working amongst the outskirts of the empire, we don't want to bring an element or reminds you of death and adventure. You hate old people so much. We're just, we're in entertainment. We have to be cautious. The single crowns guard guy is in there with his weapon out. It's just like, you can see him like shaking almost.

He's never had to deal with anything like this before. And he's like, hold up. I've never seen that one before. He looks really suspicious. Towards him? No, the guy behind him. He does look suspicious. Make a deception of shock.

Sure. He goes, don't try that on me. I've been doing this for over 10 years. I can tell. Oh, look at him! Yeah, I cast thomiturgy and make it sound like there's a sound coming from behind him too. Make a slight a hand-track to see if you can cast the spell subtly enough for him not from notice. Poor guard.

Oh! Oh! No! No! No! No! As you attempt to cast the spell, a little bit of spittle gets caught in your windpipe and you begin to cough uncontrollably.

It just falls away. She's not associated that. There's a popcorn that is going. Where did it go? You should know that whatever happened that first man when he attacked the woman, she caught whatever he had. And that is extremely worried. Nobody touched that body. And he looks back and sees you coughing over the corpse. The guy's like, don't, don't touch that body!

Are you sick? I have bloody fingers. as I just. Someone hold her down. If she's sick, it turns into one of these. I will not suddenly someone cut you. She's fine, just calm down. We've already killed, too.

He's definitely sick. Make a deception check. Definitely turning sick. Oh, it's cocked. Unfortunately, that was a good one. Oh, well, I don't know. Uh, 16? 16?

His face goes white, and he goes, kill the thing! He does a thing! And rushes forward, blade held above. No. I run to get my great sword. I run into herself. You're gonna kill a guard?

Stop, stop. He kind of holds back. He turns to you and sees you standing like a full four inches taller than him with a much larger blade and goes like, with one hand even. He goes like, look if she's going to become one of these things, we have to stop or not. Yeah, so you'll totally kill me, Phil. Gloria, you can leave. No, I, and Chester, Jester, jokes are great until they get you kill. Man, she's joking. She's joking.

He like rubs his eyes. You can see him like now that he's closer to you, you can see he's sweating, he's scared. He's generally trying the best he can to use whatever training he's received to deal with a scenario he was not trained for. This is the King's Guard guy? One of the Crown's Guard. The Crown's Guard are, yeah, they're all generally hired and trained militia that are sent amongst all the cities to keep the peace. What's your name, man? Yeah. Wow, he's really shook up. Yeah, he's James. All was James.

Flim. Flim. Flim. Flim. How long you've been doing this? You said 10 years? 10 years, two months ago. 10 years? Oh. Happy 10 year anniversary. Yeah. Congrats. Did you get like a nice watch or like a commemorative tankard?

They don't have watches, yeah. Shit. Did you get a commemorative tankard? Forget the watch part. No, don't move. I'm not moving, man. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, Flynn, hey, hey Flynn, hey man. How about first we put the swords down, because we kind of like, help? All of us are the weapons down. Yeah. You're fine.

Are any of us high charisma? At this point, because it don't seem like it. The flaps at the front of the tent, the entrance way, fold in, and you watch us, one, two, three, three, Three, four, six, ten crowns guard begin filtering into the chamber. He watches one man who, the one who has his helmet off and kind of under his shoulder. He's maybe in his early 40s or so, very short brown hair with patches of gray, somewhat jaundiced skin. Molly, you've encountered this man once before when you entered the city. He approaches Gustav right with a commanding voice.

I had a gut feeling that you were nothing but trouble when you came into our town. Gustav turns around. I guarantee to you, my friend, I have no idea. What's happened here? The Crown's Guard has been shaking turns around. So, Flynn, there was a creature. This carnival seemed to create some sort of terrible entity

that killed and then created a secondary beast. I watched it with my own eyes from the back row, and the man turns back towards Gustav and the rest of you. And who else saw that? We did. Well, we saw an old guy turn into a zombie, but it's possible that he just died because he was old, and then he had the zombie curse on him and just turned, you know?

Because that happens a lot. Gustav, it's no use. We've been found out our... terrible plot to make a zombie rampage through our carnival has been discovered. Whatever will we do now that we've been discovered for our brilliant plot to make a zombie ruin our circus. Flynn turns to you and there's like, put your weapons down. We will arrest you immediately! I'm literally holding nothing but my hands. I mean, I'm sorry, but we are basically a group of strangers. Most of us don't know each other. We all have the same story. There was a show,

the thing, an old man became a thing, and we helped destroy it. This one, destroyed it. What What more do you want from us? It ruined our show. Flynn turns back to his watchmaster. What should we do? And the man with the helmet under his arm walks forward, walks to Gustav and gives him one look over, still a few inches shorter than him, but looks at him with a sense of purpose and social status that has a sense of disinterest and disrespect.

You, sir, and duroc. and your circus are considered currently under arrest. Who else belongs to your merry band? He looks about this, and Gustav goes, If you walk, glances back at the two of you and goes, the rest of them are just purveyors of our performances. He was just joking earlier, right?

Make a deception track. Oh, boy. No. Oh, no. And you are also under arrest. Oh no. Oh no. The rest of you, what are your names?

Shirley. Temple. Kate Littagest. Not supposed to tell them. Bo, same as him. Bo. Bo. I am thou.

Point to me. See, but it works. She's in the holiday, man. Oh, it's Mary, by the way, but I think I know who might know what has happened here. Do you, tell me. I'll have to go get her. Who is this? She is the singer that made this all happen.

Flynn. Escort this woman to retrieve this individual she speaks of. Flynn kind of nods and walks over towards you. She's really shy though, and I hear she only talks to T. Flinks. So you should probably send, you know, my brother along because he's really good with that stuff. You're not to stop any random people on your way there, Flynn. You're doing good.

My men tell me that the rest of you help destroy these fiends. Is that correct? Yeah. Yes. Then on the behalf of the Starosta, I appreciate your aid. But until this investigation is complete, you are all under investigation from us. Where are you staying? The Nessle nook in. Good. Nested no. Yep. Nessled. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes.

Do not leave the city unless you are told otherwise. Should you do so, I have your names. And I can have the full might of the Cerberus Assembly track you down. You, Flynn, free this girl. While you all stand in this tent, Flynn approaches you and kind of walks a little bit behind you. Weapon drawn, but at the side. Do you lead him out of the tent? Okay. So you walk through the performer's flap, and as you walk out,

you can see kind of backed up into the number of tents that are set up. And some of the carts, other members of the circus are hiding. And as soon as you exit out the front and they see you before the crown's guard, they all immediately scatter and vanish into the nearby shadows out of sight. The two of you walk out into the center, kind of the fire crackling in the small pit off of the side. All right, where is this girl? Um, the girl do you speak of? She's in the back in the tents.

Show me. Follow me. Okay, he follows you. Which tent you leave him to? I'm back over here. Over here? Yeah. Okay, there's a larger tent as he walks by your side. There's the flap. It's slightly open. Oh, God, it's seducing.

She won't talk to me. She's too scared of me. Gets his weapon ready and he just kind of walks into the tent. I close the tent and I take off. Okay. She's so smart. There's a few moments before in the distance you hear a voice say, The tent is empty. What are you talking about? Hello?

Hello? And you don't look back and you just run into the darkness of night, into the marrow fields, and disappear. But that's so mysterious. That's runny, mysterious. Wow, that was happening. That's runny.

Mysterious. edge of the tent and at some point I just summoned Frumpkin. I have up to 30 feet outside the tent. So Frumpkin's out there. Okay. Within 100 feet. Logan keeps watch. The watchmaster, as you heard and notified earlier, returns to the rest of you. So, the investigation will begin. If any information comes to light, I could alleviate you of the charges brought to this carnival, come to me and let me know. If you have no answers before we complete this investigation, then I believe you all will fall into the

judgment. And we don't help. That's what it comes down to. I know. We got paid the first time we helped and then we got arrested the second time. I don't know what less than the way. Just say okay and let's leave. Yeah. Yeah. So the guards escort you out of the tent, Molly. You're stuck behind with Gustav and Beau the breaker with a guard of five Crown's guards set to keep watch.

As the rest of you are set to the city, the watchmaster turns once more and six. Remember, you flee. I'll find you. And that's the role in the next session. Oh, wait, what? No. I want to keep playing.

We just go to start with them. This is great. That's a good spot. We did it, we did, we did, we did. We did it. We did it. We had to get Molly out. Yeah.

Everything's better with Molly. True words. I never spoken. Well, guys, welcome to the first campaign, a new campaign, season two, I guess. Oh my goodness. Electron's crazy. We got through it.

We got through it. I'm enjoying these cool wooded cases that we have. Fucking Sam, I swear to God, for a box sake. I used 100% new dice, no repeats from Keelith. Yeah, totally new dice. I kept the gill dice. I used some new dice. Oh, combo.

What are you talking about? Some new dice. I used this beautiful little goldish's shays. The snitch is mine. Look at all the 20s' titles of the world tonight. Apparently he wants the next. I know.

I'll get a fancy, something fancy. Wants to see how to die with him. Oh, man. We gave it away. I'm excited to see what this go there. Wow. Wow.

I still don't know what half of you guys are. Oh, yeah, I didn't all get him. What's Travis? Everyone got, everyone did something that revealed tonight. You know. I don't know nothing. I don't know how to play D&D. Should we all say in case you're Sam and you don't know?

I'm a ballerina. He's a prima. He's a pretty pretty fancy month. Yeah. Well, guys. I think we're very hard. Happy New Year. Happy New Year.

Welcome back, happy year to you guys. Thank you for coming along with us on this first episode of the new journey. Thank you, Backblaze, Andy and Beyond, for being awesome sponsors, part of us in this going forward. Thank you for more and word for this amazing table. Thank you guys for coming along with us this evening for our first dive into this new venture.

Oh, my God. Hope you enjoyed it. We did. Thank you to our amazing crew. Thank you, Matt, Mars. to this amazing new campaign. Welcome to Wild Mount. I'm excited.

We're doing Wild Mount. Yeah. Thanks, Yeb. Thanks, Yev. Thanks, Yev. Guys, have a wonderful evening. We'll see you next week. See where this next stage in the story takes us.

Ashley, I'm glad you can make for this first episode. Yeah, Ashu. I'm in there. Until then, have a wonderful night, sleep well, and is it Thursday, Ed? Good night. Oh, please, not that music. That music gives me nightmares from my childhood. Could we get something a little bit lighter?

Some lighter music here. Are you a fan of true crime TV shows? And what about Unsolved Mysteries? The show that jumped started all of our love of true crime. I'm Ellen Marsh. And I'm Joey Taranto. And we host, I Think Not, a true crime comedy podcast covering some of the wildest stories

from your favorite true crime campy TV shows all the way to Unsolved Mysteries. Baby, you will laugh, you will cry. You'll think about true crime in a whole new way, and you'll also ask yourself, who gave these people, mics? New episodes of I Think Not are released every Wednesday with bonus episodes out every Thursday on Patreon. And every Monday, you can listen to our True Crime Rundown,

where we go over the top true crime headlines of the week. So come and join us, wherever you listen to your podcast. It's ticklish business anyway. You look at it. Come on, we'll stick together. Love movies? Love classic movies? So do we. Tick Bush Business is the podcast where classic film is discussed in modern times. Hosted by me, film journalist Kristen Lopez, and my co-host, author Emily Edwards, we dive into the golden age of cinema with fun, heart, and serious expertise.

As published film historians and lifelong classic movie buffs, we bring insider insights, deep research, and lively debates with a variety of special guests, ranging from celebrities like Holly Madison to TCM luminaries Dave Carver and Eddie Muller, and even family members of Old Hollywood Legends. Subscribe now to ticklish business on your favorite podcast app, and let's talk about Old Hollywood today.