Critical Role & Sagas of Sundry - C2E10 Waste and Webs

Episode Date: January 20, 2022

The Mighty Nein delve into the sewers of Zadash in search of the mysterious beast that has been terrorizing the Crownsguard.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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those are available, we're all fine podcasts are downloadable. Talks Machina next Tuesday evening about tonight's episode will be 7 p.m. Pacific, where it always is. For those of you who aren't in the weird backwards world of daylight savings time, you may have to check what time that is, but you probably know that now because of what tonight's episode is. Anyway, 7 p.m. Pacific American. For our fantastic host of Brian W.5,

We'll be talking with number four. You did it. You did it. Nothing. I literally brain farted once, and it's like, I've always really moved. It's been more than more than one. But good friends never let you forget.

I know that, it's true. That is true. Very true. But yeah, so check it out next Tuesday. WonderCon, coming up. We have a Taks Machina Critical Role panel at Sunday, March 25, at WonderCon at 11.30 a.m. in the arena. So if you guys are in the vicinity of planning to attend WonderCon,

please come join us for the panel. We all shall be ridiculous as usual. And I don't know if Sam will be up for wearing his box crotch onesie from Gen Con last year, but... Maybe you can do an interpretive dance there as well. Up right to an octagon. Yeah, higher face dye. Yeah, four pictures. Like an eight-sider or a 12-sider? That's true. That's really push the envelope before.

D4. Yeah, there's D4. There is no end to dick. This is true. So hopefully see some of you guys there. C2E2 in Chicago also, which is happening. We have panels and signings held April 7th and April 8th. You can get your tickets at C2E2.com.

We're excited to see you guys there. I met a bunch of great quitters, some great quiddos this past weekend in Lexington, Kentucky. You guys were amazing. It's such a great time to interface with all of you. For those of you who were able to come. Thank you so much for being patient. It was a wait for a lot of you, but it was a joy for me, I hope it was a joy for you.

And a lot of you were saying you were coming to Chicago as well, so look forward to seeing you there. Let's see. Once again, A26LA is a fantastic charity that we promote and push for this. They do great work with after-school classes and creative writing for underpovich teens and children. If you have the opportunity, look into it, see if you can provide any sort of funds to what they do, or go ahead and give us some time to them. go ahead and teach me part of that wonderful environment. They're amazing.

I highly recommend you check them out if you haven't yet. And Thompson, didn't you say you ran into a critter who went and is starting to do D&D? He's like starting to do stuff down there. I love that. So thank you. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, no, he was enthusiastic. I'm excited. It's good stuff. He can do it. You can too. All right, I believe we have some new merch. Oh, oh, what a da, oh. Oh, wait.

Oh, it is. What is? What is. Oh. Look at the next. And look at how beautiful it looks like your overall. Don't look at the next. That's not cute.

Those are in the store. Right now, as well as our new CR logo shirt, which nobody's wearing. Oh, I need one. I need a large. Okay, I'll get one for you. Should I get one in the store? Are they available?

Look at the shop. There it is. There it is. That's a executive. Yeah, it is. It's like the sophisticated version. Seawork. Yeah.

I'm not going to store now as well as lots of other ways to check it out. We'll be, let's have cruises soon. Yeah, let's get our own C.R. And we'll give like, we'll give out Rakes. No, no. Nothing like C.org. We're just getting over being sick. No old cruises.

Yeah, right. All right. Well, anybody have anything else I want to say? Or shall we dive in? I love you guys. I like the old scout cookies. All right. And on that note, let's go and dive into tonight's episode

of Critical Role. And while just, Ashley just full on ripcorded out of halfway a phrase. And it was beautiful. It was adorable. So. I'll get better at it again. That's okay.

It's all good. All right. So, last we left off, the Mighty Nine have been making their arrest their rounds in the city of Zadash, seeking opportunities, information, kind of getting their bearings amongst the various town folk streets and what goings on there are. Getting updates from town crier, wandering through the roads, speaking with individuals, going into bathhouses, where you met up with your fantastic long-lost barbarian.

Yes, with Yasha coming in to join alongside you guys and your exploits. You managed to converse with what seemed to be a meeting, or at least Bowen Ford met with a meeting of unhappy denizens of the empire discussing their frustrations beneath the leaky tap and had crossed some information with them. You had gone and made some purchases. You had sold off a few of the things you had acquired

in your journeys northward along the Amber Road. You had decided to looking for work, go to the Kings Hall where they had a task board there and had taken one of the contracts that apparently been posted to where you would be paid to seek the sewers beneath the city near the outskirts of the tri-spire area of the town for something that had been lurking

within those tunnels below. Apparently a couple of guards had not returned, one had gone there and fled, and you were promised a sum of money should you be able to exterminate whatever this entity is, bring back proof of its demise. And so you jointly accepted this. Before this happened, as a part of a journey

towards this tri-spire, both Caleb and Jester made their way there. Caleb, unsuccessfully entering a nicer district of the city that did not seem to believe or respect his presentation. Jester did so. did so, got a room at one of the hoity tooty inns in the district, and was led to some mild disappointments. And where we left off, the two of you had reconvened and began making your way back to meet up with the rest of your friends at the Leaky Tap Tavern. Probably

at a brief distance from each other as Caleb has huffed off and a bit of frustration. But eventually, as Caleb, you make your way to the familiar outside of the Leaky Tap, you enter the fresh Mud now a little bit less fresh and dried against your face to the interior. At this point, it's mid-afternoon. There's maybe about, say, nine patrons in there and a number of your friends who've been waiting for the two of you to return that are all sitting around a table and discussing amongst themselves. The rest of you guys look across and watch Caleb Enter, and then a few moments after Jester enters as well. Oh, hi. How'd you do? Big money. No, not so much, not a lot of money. Lots of luck gifts, then.

No. Jules? No, nothing really. But I saw the traveler, so that's good news everyone. He's still around. He's here. He's probably like hanging out with us right now. He's in Zadash, like staying here? Yes. Well, probably yes.

Isn't that hard? since he's not technically recognized. Should you be talking about him out in the open like that? Well, I mean, not a lot of people know who he is yet, so really, no, I don't think I'll get in trouble. He's a new god? Well, I don't know if he's new, but he is, you know, just not well known, especially here.

I'm sure where he's from, like everybody knows him, you know, because he's really cool, I bet a lot of people are like, oh my God, I love you. He plays lots of local clubs, but yeah. Yes, basically. Up and coming, enjoying resurgence. I love a local band. You're sure he's a god?

Yeah, yeah, he's like, really cool. Yeah, it's like so powerful. You guys should really see what he could do because it's amazing. Give us a hint. Well, like he can do lots of magic, and like he can do lots of magic, appear out of nowhere. That's cool.

That is cool. Were you with anyone when he showed up? No. Do you think he'd want to meet us or introduce us maybe? I can ask him. Yeah. I'm really interested in a god that kicks it with people. Yeah. Yeah. I've never heard of that. Well, traveler, you heard it yourself. If you like everyone here, you can just show up and Anytime.

Perception check. Make perception checks. First of all, it's 11. 11? Yeah. You look around the room and nothing seems to apparate. The clientele all seem disinterested with your presence. Nothing that would belie any sort of arrival

of an entity of which she spoke of. I don't think he's here. Well, it's possible he's just invisible right now, because he does that sometimes. That is problematic. Caronito. Yeah. I mean it is not totally unheard of the legends in history

are full of stories of the gods, debbling with mortals. I don't know what happened for you today, but it is not common, but it does happen. Yeah, it happens. So he just shows up for you as a man? Or how does that work? Yeah.

Like, you know, he's just this guy. I don't know exactly what he looks like because he's got this hood, but I imagine that he's like really handsome. Hi. I think he's really cute. He sounds really cute. You can probably hear me right down so embarrassed.

Ha ha ha ha. Hello, Guy. Right? Maybe I'll start talking to you too. Maybe Molly can do a seance. Oh, well, he might get, you know what? You might think that's really fun. That could be fun. I don't normally speak with the dead on a first date,

but we'll think about it. Yasha, do you have any kind of communications with your... Certainly don't see. see him in the flesh, so. No. Yeah. But do you talk to him? Yes, of course.

Does he talk back? Not exactly. Maybe you have to get someone really quiet because the first time I heard the traveler is just super deeper quiet. That's a good idea, actually. That's a good idea. I ask you a question.

Yes. Do you remember how long it took us? to get from Port Dolmali to the border into... I don't think it was more than a few days. I don't recall exactly. Do I recall exactly? You do. From Port DeMali to the southern gates of the Empire and the Wuyun Gorge

on foot, which you guys were traveling on foot, it took you the better part of about two weeks. But you passed through like Nakedranas, or you didn't pass through Nakedronnas. But you went through all on the road and kind of skirted among society. You took the road pretty much straight there, but it was quite a bit of travel on foot to get there. By a few days, I mean like a couple weeks. I think it's more appropriate estimation. So wait, if I sent a message from

if I sent a message from Allfield, then, or wait, where were we when I sent that message? You were in Allfield. That's correct. We hadn't lifted it. Then it would it have got to Nicodranus and to Zedash by now? Yeah, gesture. I mean, that's gotta take a while to get there and bang.

You would take quite a while longer, I think. It's too early probably for you to have checked today. We were in all field, because that was also when I stole the mail. Okay, okay. Yeah. Okay. You also sometimes people steal your mail and people get robbed on the road. Oh, was it?

Oh, yes. Oh, yeah. No, I just had an it. Oh, you had a little dirt on your face, but other than that, Shit happens. So maybe that's what it is. Of course. Now is she supposed to send you stuff here?

She was going to send it to the pillow trove. So we'll have to just hang out until it shows up then. Yeah. It seems like it's harder to get over to the pillow trove. Maybe you could have them forward your mail to here or something like. or something like that. It's not really, it would be like a pretty expensive package, so I feel like maybe I could do that.

Or if we had some sort of a PO box. I'll look into that. I don't know what it is, but I'll look into that. I have a room there tonight, you guys. The inn-it room. Room party! Yeah, but the thing is, is that a room there, Apparently it's not easy to get into that district. No, I was not able to accompany her to the pillow trough, so.

Why not? Why? Because I am shabby. You're shabby? That is fair, you are shabby. Shabby-cheek. We need to get you some nice of clothes then. You know, I was thinking on the walk back here that I would probably like to get a cloak of some kind. I mean, you could also get a new jacket and new pants.

I know where everything is in every pocket of this. of this coat. Maybe you can... It has been with me through a lot. What? Maybe we can go somewhere and they will make a coat exactly like that coat with all the same pockets, only it won't have the holes in it. I mean, how long could it take you to memorize pockets on a coat?

That's like 20 minutes. I will probably just get a cloak. Yeah, that's probably good too. Should we get you a rag as well? Just to have on hand like a hanky. Well, that's an idea. Just so you don't have to do like a full bath, you can just like do a quick.

I don't, it seems like maybe, maybe. I'm not bothered. I'm not bothered. I'm not bothered. I mean, I like. Bia also makes a good point though, just in case, you know, a simple wipe down was enough to gain you entry. Yeah, you know, water's not very hard to come by, so I can, if need be.

Or, we just keep going to visit that guy who made you clean. you clean. Pumont. Yeah. Every day we could just go see him and then he just makes us all clean. Or you can really just get a new coat. It does feel like a terrible abuse of hospitality. What, to use his power like that?

Just sitting there, just showering people all day. He knows how to do that because I wonder if he could make me do that. Is the traveler the only god you've ever seen or have you seen other gods at a curiosity? No, I've only seen that guy. So this is just this is the one that decided to make itself presentable to you. She does see hamster unicorns. What have you been doing in the room? They're gods, right?

Me? Us? They're just unicorns. Yeah, yeah. We've been sitting drinking, right? I've been drinking. We've been plotting our next moves. Yeah, I mean we've got to tackle this job at some point.

I've ever been in a sewer. Well, you've got to get to that sewer, you guys. Yeah. It's a sewer nexus. That is a sentence I've never heard in comment. I've never heard in common. Beast with webs. So we're not having this room party?

We're having the room party after the sewer. Yeah, because we'll have like bank and then we can get room service. Yeah, order because probably after the... But we'll have to get clean or else we won't get in there. I wanted to file a very expensive shower. But that's what I'm saying is the sewer first

because you're all going to be dirty like the need. And somebody else is held up. Tell room will get us clean. But you also if you own a renting a room there, maybe they have, Well, you also have to get in in order to rent the room. I think you only have to let me in, technically. Did they give you like a hall pass or something?

I have this key. Ooh. It says hell out travel. Is it a key, or is there like a thing that dangles from it? Something we can mimic and make more? Yeah, yeah, can we? It's a very intricate key. The material of it looks like it's a, it feels like a dense iron,

but it's been gold leafed or it's been coated in some sort of a reflective gold-like metal. But it's very well made, it has little scrollings on it, almost like a spiral in the center. It's, yeah, the key itself is probably. Juster, can I see it's real fast. Oh, yeah. Bo has it right now. Oh, thank you. I'll just take a real good look at it in case I want to fucking minor illusion that shit later. Okay. Good to know.

Also, I don't think that's the main issue. They're very, you know, they're very strict at the gate for who gets in, and some of us might not have a problem, but more than one of us might. Kaelic, why are you so hung up on just changing clothes for like 10 minutes just to get through the door? It seems more like you are hung up on it than I am. A lot of them are eccentric. I'm just saying you want in. I love this.

Tress for what you want. That's why I want to pick up a clothes. This is your job. We'll be a fan of this one. He gets real turned up and this stuff starts playing. You're turning back at the three piece, half-elven band that are kind of moseying their way through the afternoon lazily.

They're kind of whispering and chatting on each other and ribbing each other with their elbows between things. Just half paying attention to the music, but it's nice enough to keep that in the spirit. I'm tossing a silver over just for that. A silver? Yeah, fucking start small, man. Don't tell me how to spend my money.

As the coin clinks and rolls about two feet off, the gentleman standing with this double set of drums that kind of lays over a leather strap on him. You see that he's kind of shaved sides of his head, this young half-elvin boy, immediately sees that, stop strumming, grabs the coin, gives you a nod. and goes right back into the song. And you watch the other performers,

all of a sudden, immediately look to you, and they're all just like, well, the beats all off. She's hearing is the happiness of a performer. Are you going to? Steve Martin and the jerk, yeah. Fucking burn, man. Two things.

One, Ford, will you pass me these cookies over here? Yeah. Thank you. Second of all, are we going to try to tackle this sewer this evening, or is this something we're going to do tomorrow? I mean, let's be honest. Later afternoon. I've been looking at some of the folks around here. I think they're over-exaggerating the importance of this beast.

Yeah? Yeah. I think we should at least go down there and take a look, you know. Oh, I'm not opposed to going down there. I just mean, do we are we waiting until cover up night or are we doing this? I mean, I don't think so. I'm not a super fan of a super fan of a super fan of a sewer during the day I figure I'll like it even less at night. Well, why don't we at least go and talk to that guard that came back trying to track him down, maybe get a little bit of insight? Oh, yeah. Do we know where that guy is? Do we know what that guy is?

Which guy? The guy that came running back? When there were a guy that came back? That Voloshin said that one of them ran back from the task. Yeah, you don't know anything. You can go back and try and ask for information on that, but you haven't met him or know anything. I mean, the one thing is photosensitive than if we need to make a fast escape, I'd rather have some light maybe if it's something like that.

Daytime is better for that. Different environment. Good thing. Yeah. So is it better to go now or tomorrow morning? I don't know. No. Now.

How long is it take to get over to the Tri-Spire area? From where you are now, I'm taking maybe the better part of 45 minutes, you know, a part of an hour. Early afternoon or late afternoon, you said? It's late afternoon. You're probably about an hour and a half to two. after two hours from Sunday. Oh.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, we're not. I mean, it will be dark after that. I'm buzzed, and if I have another drink, I'm gonna be more than buzz. Oh yeah, let's drink and fight. That's a good idea.

We're definitely going right where I want to be. I want a 45 minute walk to get there. Yeah, let's do it. You'll walk your buzz off. Let's maybe stock up some torches on the way there. We don't need torches, do we? No. Not anymore. No. Not with your nerd goggles.

Yeah. I mean, do keep in mind, and this is my fault too, for not keeping track of it, but even with dark vision, you're still seeing pretty low light. So long distance perception checks without light, you're still a disadvantage on them. I've been bad about keeping track of that, but. You've been bad.

We have a light spell, though, don't we? Yeah, that's also dim light though as well. Not super bright, unless I have, I must have a torch or something. I have one of my adventurers kit. You have an adventurer's kit? I have a tinderbox. So you can turn things into torchments.

I have a hooded lantern. I have a tinderbox, too. I have a torch. Everyone looks at their equipment suddenly. This name is amazing. I don't know. This is bad. I never open. All right.

I have an axe now. You do. Yeah, hand axe. You've got a hand axe. Have you equipped it? Yes. Yeah, look at that. Oh, wow. How about we casually make our way over?

And as we're doing that, we can keep an eye out for Kingsguard and see if any of them know this guy. Yeah. All right. Are you guys making your way towards that direction? Sure. I would like to keep my eye out for a decent clothing shop on the way. Fair enough. Make an investigation check for you as you guys travel and traverse the city. Is that it 11? 11? Yeah. Along the way, you know,

keeping an eye out and asking a couple questions here and there, you eventually find what appears to be. A very basic clothing wears company, nothing fancy, but just utility, you know. Pants, worker shirts, gloves, and cloaks are available. So if you want to buy a cloak, you can do that. I would like to get something that is brown, muted, nothing gaudy. They probably don't have that anyway.

Not in this one, no. Your choices are pretty much brown, black, and gray. gray. So you're good. You're good on that one. Okay. I do not recall if they had any pricing put down for cloaks. Oh, that's 50 gold. Yeah, 600 gold pieces. Yes. It falls under, it would be general common clothes. I'll put the cloak cost it to silver. Okay, I have that. A poor bank could have. Half a cloak. Half a cloak.

Between them. One of those shitty dueling shawls that they throw Exactly. I love it. Actually, what season is it? Aren't we north? Is it going to get cold? It's cold. The further north you go, yeah.

This particular area is pretty chilly, especially since you're getting towards the end of fall. It's almost to harvest close in two weeks, so you're going to start hitting winter in the very near future. You would know this too, that snowfall is fairly common throughout the winter here. Can you pick me up earmuffs? Of course. Of course I can do that, yeah? Yeah, I ask for the largest size that they have. And I get a woolen cap as well.

For both of those together, one silver piece. Yeah, okay. I have that. Are you gonna take your ears and then just like roll them? That sounds amazing. Like 14 rat and make your tail. She has two sponge rollers. Yeah.

Perfect. Okay. So, following that, the task board contract that you recovered and was assigned to you by the Herald of the hall, contains both the writ of lawmaster intent, which is what will give you approval to travel into the sewer without being harried by any sort of the Crown's Guard. It also gives you the location of the sewer that leads you there. So following the basic instructions, asking around, you eventually find yourself, at the corner of Ruin Road and Dumest. Ruin.

R-U-E-N. Yeah, yeah. As you approach this intersection, you know, largely still cobblestone, a few that are missing, and the dust is kind of sit into those pockets to make them soft. The sky is still light, but you can see the sun

just beginning to crest past the near walls. And familiar to the two of you, you guys are maybe two blocks away from the outer wall of the Tri Spire. Hey guys, we're about two blocks away from the outer wall. We're super close. All right. At the intersection, there are two Crowns Guard that are just stationed there,

that are keeping eyes and watching around, and off to the eastern side of that intersection behind one of the poles that contained the lanterns that are lit at night. You can see what looks to be the cover that leads into the sewer below. It's essentially, I mean, it's less of like a sewer, a manhole cover, but there's a drain, open drain, and what looks to be a latch and a small metal pole that basically prevents anywhere from going into it.

Are there any clowns in it? Mega perception. That is a, why I'm looking it up. That's a 10. Why I'm looking it up. You don't see anything dangerous, Georgie. Please know. But as you begin to quickly,

or as you begin to spend time, staring through the grate and start deciding how to get into their one of the Crowns Guard Station kind of walks up quickly and goes, excuse me, can I ask you what you're doing here? Oh, good. They came to us. Yeah, this is your opportunity to shine. Get them. What? Explain what we're doing. All right, here's what we're doing. Got this whole Rith thing, from Lawmaster are going to go down, kill the monster that's been tormenting you guys.

Heard you lost a few guards. Heard any rumors? Do you know anything before go down there, maybe die? I mean, I've heard a few things. It's apparently there's something down there that's been just real scary. Yeah. Come on, man. I'm not fucking going down there, you kidding. I'm not, why? I only know what I've heard.

Did I ever ask you to come with us? I just asked for rumors, man. Don't put words in my mouth. I wasn't meaning to put words in. Open the, what did you hear? He kind of scratches his head. over his helmet and you're like, hey, he doesn't realize he's not getting to the edge. Stop, stop with the nervous ticks. Stop.

It's like, all I know is apparently they lost a couple of guys down there and... I know that. One of them was pissing himself and ran. That's still not information on the monster. Well, be my guest, and he pulls a key off of a ring goes down to what appears to be the latch on the metal bar that blocks off the entry and pulls it open from the center. What guard was it that ran away? I don't fucking knows a lot of them around here. Did you know how they were killed?

Did anybody see any wounds? They never recovered the body. They're probably eaten completely by now. Well, you're welcome to go down there and continue. Are all the sewer grates blocked with a lock? Yeah, is to prevent folks from wandering into them. Oh no, but how will we get out? Well, I'm stationed here for the next several hours, so as long as you return to this one.

To this one, you'd be fine. What if we get trapped at another one and then we can't get out? Well, start shouting. Keep that rid on hand, and if there's any Crowns Guard that hear you, they'll probably be able to let you out. Okay. Seems reasonable enough. Is there a way to navigate the sewer systems, any markings we should look out for? Um... I...

I'm gonna be honest. I haven't been honest. I haven't been able to be honest. down there. It smells real bad. You know if the sewer's flooded any time during the day, any sort of unexpected water flows? I don't think so. We haven't had any heavy rainfall. I haven't been able to hear more than a trickle down there for a number of weeks, so. Nothing about what kind of monster it is,

no, darkness, just tentacles, big teeth. Any sounds coming out of there? Nothing I've heard, no. Okay. When people ask you, who were those brave souls that ventured into the sewer, you tell them, the mighty nine. I understand.

There's seven of you. Count again. I move to the other side of not. You have to think about it for a while. He looks genuinely kind of overwhelmed by all the information. And then he goes, well, good luck. And just yell if you need something. He pulls the rest of the bar open and you guys have this space.

It's about a foot and a half. Who's first? I go. Yeah. All right. So Yasha, as you climb down, immediately it drops and your foot finds a rung. It appears like there's like a metallic bar that acts as a ladder. And as you begin to kind of lower yourself down, you can immediately look to your left and right.

And a little bit of daylight coming through kind of helps fill out some of the interior. You can see what looks to be maybe 15 or so feet across from side to side, 15, 20 feet from this wall to the other. slick stones, a slight curvature that leads into a base where there is a small ditch or a basin where liquid is trickling through. There's a mild decline heading away from the direction you are and a mild incline heading kind of in the direction of the tri-spire. The smell is not pleasant, but you're a tough chick. It's never been an issue. So you get yourself down. It's no more than maybe 10 feet to climb to the base of this. at the moment. And then you see from this spot where you've climbed down, the ceiling drops low to about 10 or so feet, and you're probably about 15, 20 feet below the surface now.

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All right. So your torch lights and kind of the bright space begins to open up from side to side. Do you see any monsters down there? I'm a change. Look around. Everything looks good. Make a perception check. Oh. Goat too soon. I don't have to play.

Everything looks... Ah! Oh, oh. Boulder from Raiders. You're on, Jeff? Oh. Uh, eight. Okay.

Like I said, everything looks. Do you want a knot down there? That's sort of your thing. You know, you're very good. Yeah, I'll come on down, knot. Before I go. Can I borrow that ring of water walking? Oh, sure.

With which one was a... Not that one, that one or that one. Okay. I know what those are. What about this one? Yeah, that's it. I think that was your... I don't know if you have to tune to it, but I'm going.

You don't. Yeah, you don't have to. All right, I'll go down there with Yasha. All right, so you climb down and join Yasha there. You can see the slight decline behind you as it progresses away from kind of the direction of where this occurrence seems to have happened. Once again, the smell, it's stagnant, a combination of waste product

and whatever else is kind of rotted and just congealed down there, that smell of bacteria-filled liquid in water. Continuing upward, you can see it kind of curves a little bit to the right and out of sight with the faint bit of torchlight that bounces off the slick wall, and there is kind of a weird humid warmness to the air down here. It's not extremely pleasant.

But yeah, you don't see anything else in here other than little little clusters of waste combined with sticks and whatever else is washed down here through previous storms and have begun to kind of build up blockages here and there, maybe a foot two feet across. Oh, we're gonna keep going? Well, we'll get the... Well, we'll wait until everybody gets down. Can we come down? Yeah, it's fine, just come down.

Coming down. All right, you all eventually over time. Keep looking and keep watching. Okay. Okay. You'll eventually make your way down into the sewer grate and then you hear that. And the metal bar up top is closed.

No, we just closed yesterday. Is it true? You're not gonna die. So. What do we think? Go up or down? Up, right? I think a monster would be down.

Yeah, monsters are down. Is there any, can I do a look around to see if there's any type of street markings for the sewers? Make an investigation check. I'll put on the love of blasting on that left hand. Natural 18, 22, I believe. 22.

22. Looking at right near the base of where the rungs are, it looks like there are arrows that point to each direction. The arrow to the right, which leads upward, splits into three additional arrows. Oh, okay. Okay. So one, two, three, type of a thing. What about the arrow to the left? It's just a continuous arrow.

What the fuck did you just draw? Just to continue. This arrow and it splits into three arrows and then, and it's a penis. If you ever make a road sign, people are fuck. That is. That's a Nintendo controller. Yeah. That's some old, fucking street fighter cop-like shit. That's impossible. Down, down, left, right. Right, yeah.

Up it around a bag. There's got to be the A and the E. Yeah, basically. All right, well, I guess there's more options this way, or just down deeper. South. I mean, it is a sewer system. You really want to go south? You too? Always down.

Well, I feel like if you were a monster, you would go. It's a further away from people. Or. I like that logic. It could just be the main drainage out of the city. That's fair. Bobby Tarantino too. That's true.

Let's do it. Let's go south. All right. I feel like we're walking in a stinky crotch, why? Why? Why would you? Why? I'm the asshole. Oh,

Oh. Oh. The traveler! All right. All right. Everything's going to be fine, Jester. Shh, don't spoil it. All right.

So you guys begin to be fine. to head southward. It's a very, very faint decline. You can only tell it's a decline in the sense that if you look right to left, you can see the water is trickling in the direction that you're traveling. The tunnel continues for about 100 feet or so

before it curved slightly to the right, and then comes to what appears to be another set of rungs and another sewer top access. And will we told that there was some sort of webbing, Yes, that was there. It was the only notable element of what you were looking for. Seeing any of that as we go? I wrote down blockage, webbing, and nest. Have we seen...

No sense of webbing? No. Do we see any rats down here? At the moment, you don't see anything moving, no. Any tracks of any sort? Make an investigation check if you want to. 13. You get down and look about, and you don't see any tracks by any means, but you do see, you notice that near where the water is, and it's a very faint trickle

of water. The streams may be about that wide, and you're just barely here moving past. You see what looks to be elements of kind of sludge that is slowly congealed over time along the edges of this groove that guides the liquid. And you can see bits that are kind of pushed like something had moved through in kind of the direction of where you were. But that's it. In the direction of where we came from? Like angled, like something slid and pushed through the water in the direction where you came from. How big are those slide marks, Yasha?

About four inches. Four inches? Yeah. And you just see like one or two that kind of just slide out. Does that mean you're going the wrong way? Or the right way? I'm going to get down and just take a little bit of the smear and just... and just... Ew.

Oh shit. Do I taste anything? Is it like two? Is it like two? 19. Ooh. Plus five. No, plus three.

Plus three. Yeah. Well, it's a combination of things. And you're a chemical history and heightened goblin senses for waste product. Oh, sure. Yeah, it's, there's hints of excrement. Now how much diarrhea blasting they do. Oh.

God! No! No! No. No. No. All right. Old diarrhea. Oh, stop it's him! Okay. This is your fault.

There's not, there's like a hint of almost like an iron-like aftertaste, something oxidizing somewhere in the water, the water itself. A faint hint of the kind of sulfurous, probably from the water, or things breaking down in the water. Nothing that catches your immediate attention except for, oh my God, she's not longer role playing. Oh my God! I didn't even put it together. That's all of the time have her second. You begin to, because you rolled so high, that like faint, faint iron aftertaste is familiar. Familiar. It's in blood.

It reminds you of when you've licked a wound or bit your lip or, it's very faint. Like the fact that you, because you rolled that high, you're like, hmm. It's lip loss. This is bloody stool. Oh, God. Oh, God. How would you know that? How'd you know that?

I know this taste. Nobody is gonna ask you why you know that. Just so we're clear, you don't need to explain anymore. You know like Pringles where you just can't have one? So, I'm gonna throw up. So what are you guys doing? So something's been killed and dragged that way. I think maybe we should head back in the office.

You made my mouth all salami. In the area where we're at the only exit now goes up another rung to the outside. Or continues on the direction you're traveling. It just, and looking at that set of rungs, you see the arrows are still marked there. There's a singular arrow that goes in the direction where you came from, and the other arrows splits into two.

You get the sense that each one of these kind of indicates where the next, you know, if you continue that way, if it's going to divide or be strong, be straight. Part of this network of sewers that have been built below Zadash long ago. But since you're tasting hemorrhoids in the water, it's probably coming from that direction. Yeah, you're right. Okay. And the water seems to be moving towards their direction we're going? Yeah. Because you're heading down and the water is trickling in that direction.

Go back the other way. Okay. Let's do it. Do it. Okay. So you guys continue back to where you were and traverse instead upwards. And you guys had paid a little bit of attention when you were traveling towards the tri-spire, but the entire city is not level. There are grades to it. It was built over hilly terrain, as most of this valley itself has all sorts of varying heights of hills and clusters of hills that happen. The tri spire is up on kind of the raised hill within the city's construct. And so as you

ascend in the direction of the tri-spire as well. You get the sense that you're not ascending too terribly much, but you're now just about underneath where the wall was. And as it curves around a bit, you look ahead as Yash is holding out a torch, and you can see what appears to be a T intersection of the sewer, where it continues on straight, or heads to the right, or to the left. You should probably lick the ground everywhere and see if you taste that blood anymore. You also see more of those clusters of built-up refuse

that have kind of just created small masses in the ground where water's kind of pooling and making its way around. The curved surface of this area, can we see the ceiling clearly? You can't, yeah. Okay. While the floor itself kind of the walls gradually come in

and become a bit of a little platform and then descend into the ditch where the water is traversing, the ceiling is just a continued curvature of it. So it's like a tube. Can we- And you make a perception check. Are you gonna look for footprints? You make an investigation check. What do that?

Perception? That's a one. 21. Okay. You see what looks to be a very faint, just barely shifting piece of thin silk cheesecloth-like material that is just barely visible on the cusp of the torchlight on the kind of the right-hand side. side of that intersection. Guys, guys, guys, look, look, look. It's a webbing.

Okay. So as we continue from this point, guys, I want to know what your marching order is, by the way, as you're traversing forward. Hey, I'm at the Beck. Right, so we have Caleb at the back. Maybe you should be in the middle. Have you ever been at the haunted house?

They come at you from behind. That's true. The middle is the back. I'll take the front with Yasha, I'm assuming. I'll be right behind them. Oh, awesome. I'll be with you. Yeah, swords in the middle.

All righty. And so not you're in the middle with them? Middle rear. Okay. I'll be. And then just to where are you? I guess I'll be right behind the molly. Okay.

There we go. All right. So you go up and inspect the web? Yeah. Okay, so you guys head up to the torch. You don't come into the intersection. You can see now the water is coming down from the path in front of you directly across. front of you directly across, the left-hand tunnel

continues for about 40 or 50 feet before it curves off and goes upward again, like almost a parallel path. And there's water trickling down there that's all kind of meeting here to the right where this webbing is. There is no water. It is just a dry kind of ditch. Oh, I bet that's where I need to go. It's blocked. It's blocked. Can I touch a little bit of the webbing with the flame? Just to see if. Sure. You go ahead and bring the torture to the

the webbing and you watch it immediately just burns away in a few seconds and just turns to ash and dust. Yes, Queen. There's also a very, very faint scratching sound. I'm activating one. I'm just pulling my hand down one of my swords and I'm going to get to light up. Activate one of them as it lights up there and you're reading the torch around to look. Put on my goggles as well. Okay, you're pulling your goggles there. I'm going to go ahead and cast armor of...

Agathus. All right. Spectral frost. Okay. As the armor kind of filters up onto you and the weird, warm, humid air of the sewer interior seems to crystallize against your armor. The ice that normally gives a translucent kind of bluish white color has a strangely yellow green tint to it. Boop mist. Snowcove. Right. Shit. As I see everybody doing this, I'm going to take a big swig of liquor. Okay. Take a quick.

So you guys look out in the distant tunnels and you see nothing. Scratch the sounds of rat, rolling. It's funny, as you glance down at the ground though, you do notice that one of those small little clusters of refuse kind of shifts a little bit. And shifts again. Clusters of refuse.

I take a ball bearing. Pork it with your stick. I was saying little, it's like a, few feet across. Oh, I said they're gotten larger as you've progressed on. Oh, and take the ball bearing and just kind of pinging. Okay. How close is it to us?

Well, you get, there's like a bunch up in the hauling around you right now, but as you throw the ball bearing and it hits, you watch as some of it kind of breaks away and you see what looks to be horrible matted fur. And there's a flash in the torchlight where you see suddenly two eyes reflect through, and you hear this sound, and you watch his fangs and you watch his fangs to open up and a bunch of the other clusters of gathered refuse all suddenly begin to shift and skitter in your direction. I need you all to roll initiative. Oh, yeah. It's a hairball.

Oh my god. Nice, nice. Nice. What happens when I roll in that I haven't been charging up? Yep, yep. It's definitely because of that. Oh, shit. Oh, right. This sure. Ooh. Is that real wet?

It just looks wet. So, as we had you guys up here. It's actual shit. You guys were very committed. Why does this floor smell so good? It's reality sleeping into our game a little bit. All righty. Are you filming a linky man?

Oh no, see Caleb, look, you should have been in the middle of us. You watch as all of these various sewer-faring giant rats begin to rush towards you. You watch with her fur seems to have over time merged with other bits of discarded debris and matter and just causing this kind of outer shell of broken garbage trash and excrement that kind of almost protects them and gives this look of a horrible half-burned pile of compost with teeth and fur just rushing in your direction. So, on that note, all you guys? I don't know.

I'm a little bit of rats right now. Yeah. He was like so boulders game. I love it. So, all right. All right. So for initiative here, guys, let's start with 25 to 20. Anyone? Oh, shit, really?

Oh, damn. 20 as well. Natural. Yeah, girl? Look at that. Your old natural 20? Natural 20? What's your initial? Zero.

Oh, that's right, yeah. All right, so we have not and your. All right, 20 to 15. That's right. 17. 19. Nice. A limited fucking war. Navo three.

All righty. 15 to 10. Oh, shit. 10 to 5. Eight. Six. No, I know. I'm going to talk.

All right. Mine was nine. Nine. And then Molly, what was your? Six. Six. All right. It might have been eight.

Let's just make eight, because I can't remember if I rolled a five or six. That's fine. It doesn't matter in the order, so. All right. All right. So at the top, as you watch all of them start rushing in, you see their eyes glaring and kind of, as they shift past the torchlight that Yasha's holding, you can see there's probably, it looks to be six, maybe seven,

in the vicinity at a quick glance around you and they're all rushing in your direction. Not in four, you guys are at first. Oh, God, oh God. I turn just to see where all of them are in relation to the party. Are there any sons of bitches over here? I can't see.

At the moment, you don't see them. Okay, great. I turn around and I see Caleb being flanked by two of them, and I know he is super squishy. So can I run towards this rat? You can. And can I reach back with my hand. That rat there gets an attack of opportunity.

You swipe out of its range first. That is gonna be a 15, actually, not to try. Oh, that hits. That hits, all right. He's got fit by a rap, running away. So as it snaps out at you, take five points of piercing damage. As it bites out and you feel its teeth sink into the back of your calf muscle. Through the armor and into the back of the actual, like, thick running muscle.

And you, the pain strikes through you and you yank your foot away and you feel something to tear. And you can feel like the blood running down the back of your leg and inside of your boot is you feel like the pounding of the probably very dirty bite that it's left in the back of your leg. The rat takes 10 points of frost damage. Which the rat also upon, as you pull away from it, the pounding pain in your leg is also accompanied by the sudden sound of a rat shattering into ice pieces

across the ground and disintegrating. You guys watch as, as it bites and sinks its teeth into, the things have the crusts over. with a similar type of strange yellowish green ice before it, just T-1000 shatters across the floor of the inside of the sewer. Continuing your round. I reach back to strike the rat, and as my hand comes down, I'll summon the falchion into my hand and strike down. In one sweep, an empty hand apparates, and you watch this water just springs out from the grasp as it slams down towards. Go ahead and roll from attack.

Is it also in yellow water? No. No. It's a 14. A 14 hits, good all damage. And it was one-handed, so 1D8. No, no. 10 points of damage. 10 points of damage. You see, sweep down.

You completely bisect the rat with your blade. You hear it scream out and just loud, heavy, horrible, monstrous squeak. You're not used to hearing what normally is a small rodent sound but amplified from a larger, kind of almost bulbous and mutated form that it now has. As you impact, you see it cut in half, and as it releases its sound. this kind of putrid cloud of whatever gases its body kind of holds in its right. I need you to go ahead and make Constitution saving throw, please. Oh shit.

Nine. Thirteen? 13? Okay, you managed to hold your breath and kind of back out of it as it kind of dissipates around you. That finishes your turn? Yes, it does. Alright. Ford. Why you go to fart while we're fighting? I got hurt. I will, so there's a couple of rats within like range of my allies, right, so that I could get sneak. A sneak attack?

Correct. There's one right there. Each one of these is considered one spot kind of between those. Okay. I'll disengage and back away down that hull, yeah, that way. And get far enough away and then turn around back and go, ah, and fire my crossbow at the one next to Jester. No, that's Molly, Molly. Right there. Okay, go for it.

Go for attack. 15 plus four, I think. That hits, gun and roll damage. Okay. Okay, well, that's a lot of T6. Right? Yeah, okay. Okay, so five, five, five, five, five, fifteen. Fifteen. You see as it rears back and goes to leap in the air towards Molly's face,

it gets maybe two inches off the ground before your bolt sinks right through its skull, emerges the other side, and it spins in the air, the momentum of its leap, striking the momentum of your bolt. And as it does, there's a spray of blood in the air in this kind of noxious, cloud of gas kind of just emerges from the wound that's left in the side of his throat. I need both Molly and Bo and Yasha to make Constitution saving throws, please. Ooh. Oh. It's like popping a balloon.

It's kind of, yeah. As you see their forms, they almost seem to be carrying, based on the bacteria and whatever they've been living, and they're carrying a large amount of this gas in their body. Fart rats. So, what did you? Natural wind. We'll walk and fart.

Eighth. They're like Charlie's. Oh. So you manage to, Molly, you pull away for the moment and kind of put your coat over the front and block it. The two of you unintentionally, it gets into your nose, stings your eyes. You both take three points of poison damage. Oh no. Shit.

Finish your turn on. That's it. All righty, Bo you're up. As you're coughing, it's stinging all of your senses and you kind of just right yourself and prepare for your turn. Sorry, hang on, I'm taking damage. One, two, three, apply damage. Okay, I'm going to take this one that is in between closest to me and Yasha, and I'm just going to do a big old golf swing with my quarterstaff. Go for it. Not that's dyes, you need to me. Not poison, that's good. That's good.

22. To hit. To hit. With, two, oh no, that's a four. That's one for a second. Eight damage. Eight damage. damage. Angrily, in response to this, you sweep down with a giant gulf swing of your Staffen as it hits, it impacts, bludgeoning the side of its body. You watch as it gets slammed, hits the wall and falls to the ground. Some of the gas seeps out of its body, but it doesn't, it isn't exposed. Okay, okay. The, it is dead, but your method of damage delivery seemingly didn't disturb whatever was contained in its body. Interesting. I saw my other attack yet. Can I move?

and kick that guy? Over which one? Yeah, that one next time. Yeah, I'm just gonna, rats kick. Go for it. Rat kick. Rat kick. Rat kick. Natural 20. Jeez, ah! Yeah. Come on, give me that big old four. That's a one. That's a one. So, two, six damage. Six points of damage. You rush up and critically kick this rat on the side of its body. Wham! You feel breaks and bones, or might be sticks, might be whatever else has kind of created

this shell of debris about its body, and it gives this, this kind of screeching sound as it falls over onto its side and then gets back in its place. It's hurting. You see it's barely holding itself in place, but it's angry and ready to snap back. I just reach over to Yasha and I go, and it is Yasha's turn, actually. Yeah. Wait, is this a dog next to Caleb? What is that? Those are all rats. I didn't have, I didn't have, I didn't have as many rat minis for this. You're your imagination.

I have reservations about killing a sewer dog. Okay, I think. You get the, you get the, I think she's got this. So I don't want anything to happen to Caleb. Can I get to this one, to the one, any of the ones over by him? You have enough movement to get to any of those. Okay, so I'll move over to one of those. Let's go to one closest to him.

Over here? Goose, scoose, go. And I'm just gonna, wait, so slashing, so bludgeoning keeps it from, from breaking open? I'm gonna just rear back and just punch it. Okay, go for it. Make an attack roll. Punch.

Punch. Josha the rat puncher. Are you not raging, right? Which is a regular attack? Real good. 23. That hits. It takes one point of damage.

Okay. whatever your strength modifier is. Ooh, that's good. Okay. So you have to, actually. Am I doing this right? No, you've got an unarmed strike. On arm strike, yeah.

Oh, wait, I just put that, I look like I have an unarmed strike too, but I don't think I do a strength modifier. You just put that in there? This is that bonus. You can do four points of damage. It technically, it's not a one point. Well, it's one point and then she adds a strength modifier to it. So four.

So four. Yeah. All right, so it's four points of damage. As you bludgeon it, you just kind of hold the sword with one hand. Or your shorts is probably still sheath at this point. You're holding the torch and one. hand. So you just rush up and just fist punch.

Do I, yeah, do I get, or no, because I moved. Do I get a bonus action? I'm so far as the torch. You don't have a, you're not a polite weapon, it's not a weapon that you can off hit with it, yeah. You're not, you're not, you're just like touch it? You could have if that was your action, but you've already punched it, so. Okay. However, you did straight up rush up and cold cock deck a sewer rat in the face. And as you do, Once again, you feel the crunching weight behind it as it kind of falls over and gets back up.

Its jaws kind of hanging off to one side and it has this horrible gurgling sound as it screams at you. You watch as a combination of reddish blood and whatever kind of putrid green liquid is also kind of mixing it important of its mouth. I'm going to... Okay. That ends your turn then, right? Yeah. All right.

It's now their turn. So this one is going to go ahead and just shift around, kind of painfully limping to get down and try and bite up towards your legs. This one's going to go ahead and move still in combat with you and go after, actually no, because you push it. It's going to continue after you. This one is going to come after you, so on, since you rushed up in its way. So the one coming after Beau, that is going to be a 15. Yes. You go ahead, just duck out of the way. The two against you is a 16. That hits.

All right, and 17. Both hit. No. All right, so you take from the first one. Six points of piercing damage. As it leaps up and actually... I have resistance to piercing. You're not raging. Oh, you have to be raging?

Yeah, that's this comes to the rage. That's okay. Okay, okay, got it. So yeah, you can use a bonus action on your turn to rage if you ever want to. Got it, got it, got it, okay. It's okay. So you take six points of piercing damage.

Okay. As it bites up and you put your arm in the way and it just clamps onto your forearm and it gets on to your forearm and it gets onto the ground, spins, it gets back to its feet. The other one, you get it, You take four points of piercing damage. As you shove that one off,

the one leaps onto your back and you can snapping at the back of your neck and shoulders, and you're just kind of shove it back onto the ground and it readies itself for another strike, because they're kind of slowly swarming around you. Ending their turn now, Jester, you're up. Okay, I'm going to run up to the one that just attacked Yasha.

Okay. Yeah. And I'm going to hit it with my hand axe, because I'm not, um, They're smart. Go for it. This is the one that's already been punched too, so you rush up with your hand axe and swings. Go make some tech roll.

You can flip it, blade up. Ooh. That definitely hits. That's 21. Yeah, that hits. Go and roll damage. Okay, there's a little silver set up there. Seven.

Seven points of damage. Yes. So the rat that's face is already kind of broken. You watch how even managed to bite towards Yasha earlier. It was mostly dragging its top fangs across. the side of our forearm as its jaw would not actually snap shut. You finish the blow by taking the axe, swiping down as you do. You carve into its body. The cloud of poison dissipates from its torso area. I need Yasha, Caleb, and you just are to make Constitution

saving throws, please. Aww. Oh, that was a good one thing. You see it was like, oh no, fuck's good. 19. Okay. You managed to hold yourself off, not being taken to it a second time. Eight. Eight. Five points of poison damage to you as you accidentally inhale a spray of it in your face. It's in my mouth. Five? You also take five points of poison damage. Oh no. Tomato juice, bad.

First up. Oh man. That shit doesn't work. No, it doesn't help. All right. Have tried. Then in your turn, Jester? I think so. Okay, so you finish coughing. Oh, wait. Yeah, I don't want to use the idea. Okay, then Molly, you're right. I kind of see the mess this is making, and I'm going to just turn around and try and. You just bought it.

I'm like just holding the sword, but I'm just gonna punch with the hilt of my store, just sort of punch. Okay, so you can go for it. So which one are you going up to? The one that vote kicked? No, no. Yeah, the one that attacking you off.

Okay, go for it. So you just roll a D20 and add your strength. One plus my strength, my non-existence rank modifier. Yep. That's, uh, yeah, 12 to hit. 12 just hits. That's one damage. You deal one point of damage to that one.

As you reach down and suck it in the head. I can take a bonus attack though and I'm going to hit it again. Go for it. 12? Are you attacking with your... No, well, I'm using my other hand. Since the second thing, I have two attacks. We have two attacks with the light weapon on the side. Technically, I'll allow it. It's fine. Go for it.

It's only one point of damage. It's another point of damage. Okay, so it takes two points of damage. So now this, you guys are just, you're rat punching. You guys are just going through and punching the fuck out of the rat. Of the old end, it's just bad. Pushing the fuck out of a rock. You are just repeatedly decking it in the face. Your knuckles are bleeding a little bit. It's not enough to damage you, but as you're punching down, you're hitting like slick oiled

fur and what looks like jagged points of broken wood and whatever else is kind of jammed itself into its matted fur. But you manage to hit it a couple times and it's taking a little bit of damage, but it's still like, it looks very kind of cornered and lashing out now. That ends your turn, Molly? Caleb, you're off. That's so sad. Okay, I would like to start backing up towards this direction towards knot away. Oh, no. No, no. And I would use a Caleb bonus action to dry-heave, and then I will use my action to cast a fireball towards the rat by Yasha.

Byasha, go for it. Won't attack? Oh, that's okay. It's a 13. 13 hits? Yeah, that is. Go to hold damage on the fire bolt. Yeah.

It's a D10, right? Yeah, D10. It's a five hit points. Five, between the punches that you gave it, that's enough to finish it. So, you reach up. As you run back, you finish dry heaving, and then release the bolt of fire.

And Rockets Pass, you guys watch as the sewer walls kind of light up in succession down following the streak of flame through as it impacts. It was a burst and what would have been the gas that is released from its body incinerates from the fire damage and does not affect anyone's surrounding it. All righty. Finishing Caleb's turn, that brings us to the top and not before it. Are there more rats? There is one more over here. That's like limping next to Beau. Where's our order? Ladies, Fers, it's down here it's rats.

We're not using that shit. All right. All right. Not will go forward next to Caleb and just peer around and fire another cross flow with the one next to you. I got it, I got it. I know, I haven't seen, I haven't been in any gas. I don't know what's going on.

All I can see is you guys just going, oh, oh, oh, like weirdos. So I'll fire. Go for it. Oh, too helpful. You're being too helpful. 18. 18 hits, go and roll damage. I feel safe.

No. Is a sneak attack damage? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, no. That's still a lot. In the teens. How do you want to do this? I guess I will.

Way to date yourself right there. If there's a way to pin the rat to the wall, I'll do that. Okay. He said bono. So as you turn around the side of Caleb, putting your second bolt in, spinning around, firing, it strikes the side of it. And you watch as where you hit it in the side, there's this large pocket of like stretched rat's skin where it's pulled so far that the fur itself is disparate and you can see kind

of the peach flesh beneath the fur. And as it hits it, it's a combination of force from both the blow of the bolt and kind of the propulsion of the release of gas. right in the direction of Bo, I need you to make another Constitution saving, though, please. You got it, smash it. Do I have some? You're rolling the bad dice again. They've rolled one again!

Laura, put it in it. That's okay, you only take one point of poison damage, or we'll lay low for that one. It's really pretty, though. What a pretty die. So, you take one point of poison damage. Okay. Everyone's catching your deceiters here. Two-one on that bitch.

You guys go. No, wait. What had a day we're going now? I mean, the belief in the dice. How will we choose? No, no. No, no. No, no.

You work to make it so much. Sure, so this is the direction you guys had come in from. Yeah. So the liquid is traveling down this way, and then down this way, and there's no liquid from the side, and the web that you had destroyed was up in this corner. Okay, we go that way. Yeah. Before we move, I'm standing with two flickering Caleb's next to me, and all three of us look at Molly like Jim from the office, and they just go away. Oh no, how hard does everyone go?

I did. No, good, yeah. I mean, I'm 19 out of 32. That's pretty. Right, I should do a cure wounds on you. I'll take it. Okay, I cast cure wounds on the Asha. All right.

What were you down to? 19. That's above your hole. That's above your whole thing. That's my max. That's your bags? Yeah, I'm sitting at 14. Well, it's good.

I took the hits, you know. Yeah. That's why I said that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. In comparison to some of the sense you've encountered in this conflict, suddenly the rest of the sewer doesn't smell is bad. Yeah. But you'll burn right the fuck out.

Yeah. How hurt are you, Bo? I'm all right. I'm only down for you. Five. Oh, okay. Hit points. Okay.

Let me know, you guys, because I've got lots of healing, because I'm the cleric. Seriously, Caleb, how are you? I know, I've been worse. It's okay. I'm okay. If you hit you really hard,

you still be standing up right now. If who hits me very hard? That's a good question. I hadn't really thought about that. If she hits me very hard, I'm a dead man. If she hits me very hard, I'm probably okay. I would never hit you. I know, that's just, you know, it's just a,

like a, like a, okay. It looks so good. You have a monster on your chest. Are you very scared? Generally are you asking me? Just right now? Right now? No, because I am with all of you, and those were just mice.

I'm extremely scared right now. But I think that we killed the monster. We can go back to the surface now, right? I don't think that was the monster. That was clearly something down here that's been killing people. I think something's making those things. like that. The rats are not making webbing.

There's something else. Oh God, what if it's a giant spider? It's probably a giant spider. You said giant spider out loud. And they're turning into a lot. Spiders don't like rats. Rat spiders. Oh.

I just don't understand what those rats were. Poison balloons? Yes. Did you see the one that kind of looked like a dog, though? That was freaky. At first I thought it was some sort of evil. sort of evil, ghasty dog. I would theorize that perhaps their diet is like 20% food

and 80% diarrhea, so it's not very surprising that they're exploding. Yeah. Can I bend down and just kind of covering with my vest a little bit, see if I can search and figure out exactly what these things are made out of? Okay. As you kind of push through one of the open wounds,

of one of the ones that was cut through by either Jester or Ford, I'd say about a third of the body mass is just an assembled shell of refuse. The interior of it appears to be rat or animal-like. General array of organs, though a lot of them have kind of a colorless gray or beige appearance to them, and a lot of them look to be in various states of necrosis. There's a lot of infection inside. Yeah, it's pretty nasty. These are undead rats.

I think they're full of pause. Are the undead rats? You go ahead and make an intelligence check. With advantage? With advantage. All right. Where's my intelligence? There we are.

That's a no, that's a nine. Nine? Nine. Nine? You would know enough from your, from the knowledge that you have that while there is necrosis in there, it doesn't look like it's fully in there. So these things are. Mostly undead.

Or at least most. Most. Mostly. Yeah. They were alive up into a moment ago. But these infections where they continue for a period of time, probably not for long. Zombie rats.

Just really infected rats. No, they just had pink eye in all the pots. You know, this really is only the appetizer. Maybe we should try and find the main course. We should keep going through. Should we be more sneaky? Or should we just like, you know, just walk? Yeah, maybe we should be sneaky.

I think stealth would be a good idea. Please sneaky. All right. To the right. Okay. You do get a glance with your torchlight, Yash, as you glance up the path across the way and the path that curves around the side,

you do see what looks to be a few other similar collections. Collections, though not moving or not reacting to the vicinity of where you are. And even glancing at the ones that were fighting you, you can see upon closer look that their eyes are kind of snow blind or infected at the point. where they probably were very, very near sighted or close to blind. So the patches in the distance you see are reacting to your presence.

We could set them on fire from a distance. Or just don't disturb them. Yeah, but what if and then they all spring up? We could just set them on fire. Are we going that way? No, you're having a functional ecosystem. Oh, okay, well, then fine. Let them live and die in horrible pain.

Yes. So I'd like your old role stealth checks, please. Stealth checks. Can I hope someone there, Jesse? Oh, yeah, here you go. Oh, not me. I don't need it. Who's the most noisy of us all?

Which one of you fathers need somehow? I rolled shit for stealth, so it wouldn't be me. Oh, well, here, take an advantage. Oh. I'll let it happen. Usually you have to give that before they roll, so you don't know. Should I just take up the rear? You coming back after I break?

It's fine. Is it better? 15? 15 is better. Okay. 12. Hold on. Hold on. The war is over and both sides lost. Kingdoms were reduced to cinders, an army scattered like bones in the dust.

Now the survivors claw to what's left of a broken world, praying the darkness chooses someone else tonight. But in the shadow dark, the darkness always wins. This is old school adventuring at its most cruel. Your torch ticks down in real time. And when that flame dies, something else rises to finish the job. This is a brutal rules-light nightmare with a story that emerges organically based on the decisions that the characters make. This is what it felt like to play RPGs in the 80s. And man, it is so good to be back. Join the Glass Cannon podcast as we plunge into the Shadow Dark every Thursday night at 8 p.m. Eastern on YouTube.com slash the Glass Cannon with the podcast version dropping the next day.

See what everybody's talking about and join us in the dome. The world of Sonic the Hedgehog has been thrust into a not-so-dark, not-so-stormy, hard-boiled detective story that probably nobody saw coming. Follow Sonic and the Intrepid Chaotic's Detective Agency as they take on their biggest case yet. This high-flying action-packed adventure will take them across the world, fighting for every quill they can fight. It's one heck of a tale. Which is good, because this story might be the only thing that can save their lives. Well, if that's all, I can just dispose of you. Wait, what?

All will be revealed in. Sonic the Hedgehog presents The Chaotic's Case Fires. Listen now, wherever you get your podcasts. When the Chaotics are on the case. Check. 10, not so good. Eight, not so good. 16. 18.

18. Okay. So as you guys continue down the right pathway, you continue further and find out the clusters of just makeshift bits of discarded material begin to give way as about 20 feet ahead of you, the torchlight begins to refract and reflect against some sort of soft material that is just kind of drifting and enclosing a portion of the wall. You see ahead of you a majority of the tunnel is currently blocked other than a small path on the right side of it by a dense webbing of some kind. You can see immediately what looks to be a large knot or a knot, not a knot of webbing as well that is kind of held a loft kind of at the foot up from the ground. Or a body.

it could be somebody that's just being slowly sucked dry of all their blood. I'm totally right. Should we set it on fire or should we see if it's living? I think we should try and cut it down. Is it wiggling it all? Shroding us. Make a perception chair. 15. 15. Does not appear to be moving. I think it's dead. You think it's dead? Or insidated. What if we...

Should we go try to cut it down? Without alerting them. You normally touch a spider, but it comes around. Is it a, yeah. That's true. I have read a lot of books, lots of them. Do I ever read anything about the science of larger insectoid creatures?

Possibly insectoids. This would not be technically an insect. Okay. It's not familiar to me. I mean, it's webbing, but there are many creatures in nature that use webbing in different forms at times. Okay, okay. YouTubers? Yes, there's that.

But glancing at this, the mass that is encased in the webbing is about this big. It's a dog. It's about dog-sized. Or a rat. Is it close enough to us? It's about 20 feet heady. Can we see past that into any further clumps of webbing? Make a perception check with disadvantage because it does go beyond the torch threshold.

So it doesn't appear to be human-sized. That one does not. That one does not. 14. Looking past, you can see the layers of webbing continue for about what you can see 20 feet beyond that. It looks to be an even heavier wall of it behind that completely blocks, continue to access into that chamber.

And you can see what looks to be two other larger, much larger clusters of webbing that are wrapped around something. Are we able to get to this lump? You can get to it, yeah. But do we have to go through some of the web? There's bits of it that are just kind of drifting below, and you do see that it does shift every now and then. It looks like there's some sort of a breeze coming through, faint as it is,

and that's why, from the webbing that is currently held a loft between the ceiling and the floor and the left wall from your perspective, the first one you see, every now on you see it just kind of faintly shift as it. if a breeze or water moves. Can we have to break any of the planes of webbing to get to this cluster? To get to this one, no. Let's cut it down.

Maybe we can look at it up closer. You can? I'm gonna try and very gently, maybe, with everyone's permission, I'm gonna start gently cutting into the bottom of it, not too deeply. If something comes out. Wait, wait, wait, should we make it,

get ready for some sort of a distraction or to do something to the other web first? I'm sorry, do you have a plan? No, no, I just, I just, cut it up, and I want to see what it is. I'm just, I've too, okay. Is this the one with your activated right?

Yeah. So, and the right you activated was? It was the radiant right. All right. So the right of the dawn. Okay, so as the scimitar, which is now glowing with this kind of faint, radiant light energy, it almost burns through as you carve through slowly.

It's not like a, an easy cut, but you do kind of just carve through. And as you do, you watch as the wedding begins to kind of curl back and blacken to the edges. And as it pulls away, you see something furry and fleshy, and as you pull back a few more inches, you watch as a rad head kind of lulls out, a tongue just falling out the side. It looks to be dry. It looks to be berift of any sort of internal liquid or life. No, that means that the human-sized ones are probably fucked up too.

Yeah. That's probably true. Or they haven't been eaten yet. How long ago did they say the guards went down and didn't come back? quite a while, but I'll remind you that our mission is not to retrieve any guards, it's to kill this beast. But if we kill the guards, excuse me, the beasts that are down here, then it might be worthwhile to also check the bodies of the guards, you know, because they're not going back to their families. Let's just try not to set fire to anything without... You want to have to steal from the dead bodies. Well, they're not going to use it. I agree. Yeah. I'll work with that.

Should we move forward to the first plane of webbing that would hinder our minds? Just a suggestion, we don't have to do this. I'm not even sure how I feel about it, but I have just learned how to create a somewhat spectral servant to me, one that is unseen, and I could send it in to kind of poke about, and if anything is going to happen, it could happen to it first instead of us. I like that idea.

Does it interact with the environment, or does it move things, and, you know? Would it move the webbing as it went through? Yeah, yeah. What do we like more poking the webbing or sending it up in flame? I agree with Ford. I think if we start poking around, that thing's going to come running. Might as well run it. If you get the drop on it. If you burn its web, it will do the same thing.

What if we back up and burn it? My way thinking is, what if that web's sticky as shit? I don't want to get caught in it. That's why I said, why don't we back up and burn it? I think that's actually a little bit. Just let's try and not set fire to the human-shaped things. Oh yeah. What if they're still alive? Well, how about Caleb?

Yeah. What if they are? What if they are? servant to poke at the little masses of human and see if they start wiggling. Good idea. Okay. Also, I will say that you're worried about burning their dead bodies, but if we burn the dead bodies,

they might burn, we're not going to help them, but if any coin they have or any items that are magical in nature, will be fine, so it's okay. The thing is, if we kill them, I mean, we're putting them out of their misery, you know? They'll probably just end up as giant pus sacks if they survive. They're probably, or maybe they just were wrapped up

like five minutes ago and they're totally fine. Yeah, that's possible. And this thing that I can do, this servant I can make it, it's not going to be able to open these things. No, I know, I said, poke it, and then if they wiggle, then we know they're alive. Sure, how about a poke and then a flame? Poke and a wiggle.

Then a flame. I think if they start moving, this thing's gonna. Well, it knows that they're alive. Then we'll get eyes on it. So I'm sure they wiggle every now and then anyway. That would not, doesn't have bad dreams. We burn some people that are still alive and then we can set it all on fire.

No, no, that was Caleb. It was freaked out by fire. Oh, right. Yeah. Do it, Caleb. I pull a stick out of my coat, and I hold it between thumb and pinky like this, and there's a string wrapped around it,

and I take my fingers, and I pull along the string, which begins to glow, a faint gold glow, and the being, the same height and about same skinny-ass proportions as myself appears before me. Well, it does not appear. It doesn't appear. You tell me, because you're the dungeon master. It's unseen.

Yeah. But you sense its presence You watch as in the, on the dry dust-covered floor of this interior part of the sewer, where the temperature is dropped and is a little less humid in this area, you watch as there are two small plumes of dust on the ground, and you sense that the servant has arrived. I go up and I push it. Okay, you put your hand forward and it's like hitting the back of someone's back,

but there's nothing there, and it kind of catches you off guard. You're like, what the head? But it feels somewhat, more of us like there's a heavy wind pushback for a second, but there's no wind, and there's no whipping of force around your arm. It's very strange. I think your unseen servant farted on me. Well, the rats have already started.

So, Schmidt, I want you to go to these larger bundles and just give them a little pokey poo. All right. So Schmidt goes past, you sense this. Past the first webbing barricade, which has a small kind of five-foot space between it and the wall, to the next one that you saw, which encompasses the entirety of this wall. There are like small, one-foot wide sections of it along the part of the wall where there is a gap, but most of it's just pure web across.

There are two of them there, and are you getting closer to the torch, to reveal it, otherwise it's gonna be just beyond the torchlight. It's gonna be very dim and hard to see the details. Yeah, I'll follow as far back as like that. Sure. I have to stay within 60 feet of Schmidt, so. Right, so the two of you kind of approach that the first barrier to see the second.

As Schmidt approaches the second barrier you watch as one of the masses, which does appear to be humanoid in size, shake slightly, doesn't react. The other one, shake slightly. and you watch as an arm kind of limply falls from the side of it, because of the webbing, tearing. As it does, you hear a metal sword, ping, clang to the ground.

You see what looks to be a bracer that once belonged to a crown's garden. The bracer kind of, and just drifts on its own in your direction. I wonder if the giant spider thing heard that. What? Probably. What did you say? I did not understand the dragon sound.

I said, I wonder if the giants, shh. She wonders if the giant spider hurt it. Yeah, we all wonder that. So we're dead, huh? Well, not moving. Burn that shit, and then the spider will come and we'll burn that shit too. How close am I to one of the human form ones? You're about 10 feet from it.

They look pretty dead, don't I? They look pretty dead. 10, 15 feet from me. Fire starter. I mean, this is a fire starter over here. Let's burn it. I can do it from a disdeme. Should we get into some sort of position so we're not all clumped?

Yeah, do you have any specific order you guys want to maintain here? Well, how about four on one side and four, and they're three on the other. That's a tunnel. That will do. Caleb, do you want to stand behind me and just little pixies from behind? I would like to stand behind everybody. I'll take the front of the other side of Yasha, since I got some armor. I'll stand behind four.

All right. I guess I'll go with team Caleb Yasha. Wow. Betrayal. Okay. I'm trying to split it out. Is it Molly and Ford at the front of the other group? I'll go behind Caleb. Okay, so now goes behind Caleb.

Then we have Ford and Molly on the other side with Jester behind them. Yep. A little bit of magic on both sides. A little bit of tank. Svords. Okay. So you just move around that barrier,

get to the next 10, 15 feet up where there is the next larger barrier of weapon. and the two unmoving humanoid forms wrapped with the... I can do this from 120 feet away. Once every six seconds, I'm going to use firebolt. So I would just go, and hit them both. Okay. Six seconds apart.

They both impact, and you watch as the body's going to shift. There's a burst of flame. Some of the webbing kind of ignites and burns and curls away, but it looks like the burst of the flame is so instantaneous, it's not enough to immediately ignite the webbing. Oh. There is a burnt mark on them, and neither of the forms move or react to the impact.

And the web kind of shifts and shakes for a moment before it eventually comes to rest again. Just as a test, so the one on the right, I'd do it again. Okay, you do a second time. It burns a little more, and you can now see as the webbing burns away in that section, you can see what looks to be the Crown's Guard armor chest plate that is now a little bit charred beneath the impact. Okay, well, he's dead. Should I just keep chipping away?

Do we see any spiders? Spiders? Yeah. I'll help. Are we moving forward or we're still? They're all still in the battle, but you can move forward if you want to move forward. This is every six seconds, so I could just stand here for a minute and just keep going and not get close.

You do me a favor, make sure nothing sneaks up behind us. What? There's things behind us, too? Could be. So I guess I'll go there. We'll take the next 30 or 40 seconds if that's what it takes. I'll focus on one and just keep burning it away. Okay. So I'm going to go 15 feet behind us.

Okay. So you go ahead and shift yourself 15 feet behind, make perception check, just so you're gonna watch. With disadvantage, because unfortunately, you're away from the torchlight to do so. That's a one. Oh, no. So you keep them watch.

So as one or the other, the webbing is kind of shaking and shifting. Eventually, after four or five blasts, the web begins to catch fire, and you watch as the red and orange flames kind of expand and begin to emilate both of the unmoving bodies. The webbing then burns away and eventually begins to detach from the weight and the loss of tensile strength. And that whole wall kind of shifts and collapses to the ground. Both of the bodies hit the ground. The webbing burns away. It's not enough to catch the bodies on fire, though it does singe and burn the exterior.

And as you look, they're both in various states of decay. The skin you can see, as you kind of approach a little bit, Yasha, to take a look. The cheeks within their helmeted heads are sunken and sallow. The lips are curled back over the teeth. They are drained. of any sort of internal life force or blood. Can I poke around with the tip of my sword and see if there's any money or something in their pockets? Yeah, make an investigation check. We are the worst. We are the worst.

I'm not using it. Might as well get paid out. That's what I say. Protting around, yeah, there is. I mean, they, from just glance, both of them have coin purses on their belts that are kind of folded into their belt, you know, as protective measure, but they both look like they were caught. in a state where they would be willing to travel

or go anywhere to spend money? I'll take them. Okay. So you begin to pull from their bodies. What are the other of you guys doing? We could take their weapons. I bet they're like nice weapons. Or we can return them to the Crowns Guard.

Maybe they would reward them. Do they have like a dog tag? Yeah. Kind of glancing about as you're inspecting the bodies, there's no identifying tag to them. There isn't an elaborate system of maintaining Crownsguard members are identifying that you've noticed at least. Can I search for puncture marks?

Stab wounds, bite marks. Make a medicine check. Can I take their helmets and put them in my pink bag? Sure, easy enough to do. What about their weapons? Do they have any? They do. They both are carrying long sword. And they're well kept, not used. You look like the blade and there are barely any signs of indentation. Does it say anywhere proper, do you have the crowns guard? No, but they are uniformed design.

I mean, they're not like very elaborate ornamental. They're just, the Crowns Guard weaponry are all pretty much designed or provided by a similar blacksmithy technique so they all feel like they're uniform to a certain degree. Ten on the medicine check. That's enough. I mean, it's not too hard to see.

As you look over each of the two bodies, both of them have heavy puncture marks, either right in the back of the neck on one of them or the other one has it right under the front of the chin. and the puncture marks are about that wide, about two inches across on each side where the skin and flesh has been kind of bubbled and pushed away from the side, and they go very deep in. So big fangs, probably fucking pincers. You know. Yeah. So watch your shit.

Caleb stands still for a second and looks around. Do I hear anything? Make perception check. perception check. Yeah. Oh, that's on my sleeve. Oh, that's a one, so I don't hear anything. Okay.

How's the ground that we're standing on now? I mean, there would have been some kind of general webbing towards the base of this, but you've burned away that central area. And as you kind of step forward, you look beyond where that burning mark is, and there is a stark left turn. It curbs to the left, and looking around the side, it curves again to the right, maybe 20 feet beyond that, and you see another webbing.

and you see another webbing barrier, with it looks to be three different figures. And you see now there's another figure that is not part of the webbing barrier, but it's just webbed to the wall right next to it. But the stone is unimpeated to the point where it'd be an issue. You do see, no, there's, I mean,

you feel a little bit of stickiness when you step around from just general fallen bits of stray webbing strands and such, but nothing that would impede your movement. How was it to try to just chop through it with the axe? You can go try to either one behind you or the one ahead. I want to try doing it and see if it like sticks to the weapon. To the one ahead?

To the one ahead? Yeah. Okay. So you come forth to the web there in front of you to where there you see the two other figures that are kind of a mass. They're both humanoid and you now look over at close glance. There's a third one that's small. Looks to be another one of the rat creatures that was caught in there. You carve through, go ahead and make an attack roll.

All right. And roll damage for the hand axe. Seven. Okay. So you carve through and you watch as a large part kind of tears through before you before your hand axe stops, and you're like, I can't push any more when you try and pull back. And as you do, you pull your arm back

and it just gets ripped from your grasp, and it's now kind of stuck and fold, and your hand axe is now kind of wobbling in the web. I'm gonna cut her hand axe out with my, very gently cut her hand axe out with my radiant sword. Okay, you begin to carve around it and pull it out and you eventually get it free, but now there's a cluster of webbing around it,

almost like a, like a, the world's worst cotton candy. It's just kind of wrapped around the center of it, but it's sticky in. No, I could help you with it. Don't, even. No. Jester, put it on the ground and take ten steps back away from it. Pink.

Ting, ting, tink, tink, ting. The metal hits the ground and makes a bit of a sound. I said it's covered in webbing, so not as much sound. No, but the metal still hits the ground. All right. You watch as the flames kind of burn around it and free it, it lights up the vicinity a little bit. There's that kind of wedge opening where you've cut in that webbing barrier,

and behind it you can see the entire floor of the next portion appears to have some some sort of webbing layer around it, and all the walls are covered in it. Across the way, you can see what looks to be rungs. And the end of this portion of the drainage that leads up into where you can see the wind would be coming through. And that faint bit of wind that's pushing through,

it's causing all the webs to shift, is coming from what you can barely make out to be the faint bits of sunset light peeking through another exit, a sewage exit, just like the one that you came in. But you also see a number of other figures that are all webbed to the walls and encased within there. All of the ones webbed to the walls are just as emaciated in debtors. Make a perception, Jim. Can I get my hand axe back?

You can, yeah. Thanks, God. Six. You glance past in the distance. It's too hard to see, unfortunately, because the torchlight's too far away. How close are we to those now? Well, you're at the second web wall. That's about 12. about 25, 30 feet from you, so it's just beyond the torque slide of where you're standing.

And it's a dead end past all of this? It's a dead end and just goes up? It just goes through dead end, but it's all covered in webbing. It's going to be around here somewhere, right? Or it's behind us. I'm going to start trying to cut down, find the points of the web wall where it's being held together and cut any of the The car.

Because if you're right, you managed to carve through and you watch us, the second web wall kind of comes and folds to the end, the bodies that are encased in it hitting the ground with heavy thuds. You can see the other bodies that are webbed to the walls around. On the inside, you can see the end of this. It is just a giant web nest. If we deem it safe,

maybe someone could look at this other exit because probably something is down here with us, but mayhap's above the grate, this thing lives in a house, perhaps? I don't know. I'm spitballing. Or if we go up to the grate and try and get someone to open the hatch, In case we need to beat a speedy retreat. That is also good.

There's two reasons to do it. Should I go up? Yeah, do it. Okay. We'll give her the writ of law thing. Yep. Is it blocked and webby all along the road? As you walk past, the ground itself, it's sticky.

You can still move, but you're hindered somewhat having to pull through, and it kind of tugs at your feet, and you guys watch us, Webbing kind of tears and builds on the bottom of her boots as she walks in. I stop walking. You stop and look, and you can see there are all these, you can see the faint outline of bodies that are just kind of webbed to the wall, barge of the faces that are revealed that are just gray and lifeless drained. On the far wall, you see what looks to be a large cluster of webbing.

It looks like a mass of three or four bodies kind of jammed together. And you see one body that's right next to where the rungs are that is not as webbed as the others, and there is color to the skin. You see what looks to be elements of a humanoid face, a halfling, it looks to be, a halfling size. It is about a foot up off the ground, webbed to the wall. One arm is kind of drifting out in part of the face and unconscious, but is not gray and dead like the others.

And that's we'll take a break. No, but that's a person. I know, we'll come back on that. It's just because I want to make sure we all get a bathroom, including myself, I can be like a fucking racehorse. So yeah, we'll pick up on the reveal of this, Non-dead body. I didn't like it.

I went and I was like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. All right. So we're back in a few minutes. First and foremost, we have our Wormwood giveaway, which we've worked through some of the stuff. So yeah, giveaways and laws are weird. So I apologize for the heads-up, but as part of this Worma giveaway, you need to be in the Twitch chat to participate.

I apologize. I apologize. We're fans of Deadwood, if you couldn't tell. So yeah, right now the offer is only for residents of the United States and Canada, excluding Quebec because of laws. We're trying to figure out how to expand that, but that's where we are at the moment, so I apologize if you're not part of that. I'm so sorry. We have no way to get it. We're working on it. But for the official rules, you can follow the link in chat. It should be available to you. Tonight's prize is the Purple Heart Adventurers Arsenal, which you may recognize as the wood that Stanlin had in the last campaign. In case you hadn't seen what these arsenals are, it's a dice box as well as

a great interior where you can keep your dice, your pen, minis or erasers, anything else want to keep it there. They're pretty badass. So yes, we'll have, so we have that. The contest has officially started. So all you have to do is go on Twitch chat. Tonight's code is sewers, the plural, sewers. Is there an A in that? No. No. That's doers. But yes, that's the keyword. Only enter it once in chat, or entering it more than once, we'll disqualify you. But good luck, everyone. We'll announce the winner and come back from the break.

I'll be contacting the winners after the break, so make sure you keep an eye on your whispers. But yeah, we'll see you guys back here in a few minutes. And welcome back. So, first and foremost, we know some folks are having problems, issues of the D&D Beyond Discount Code. She thinks it was a Misible One.

They're working on a D&D Beyond, but don't worry, the code will be active for a while. So we'll just look for updates or keep trying. They're working on that. Also, we have our winner of our fantastic Wormwood giveaway. Congratulations to Sestka! Scope War. Scope War.

You are the winner. I'll get that out to you, so well done. All right, so bringing us back in, you guys had just noticed the furthest element of this portion of the, this segment of the sewer, where the webbing had become far more apparent. You had discovered a few bodies that came over, you had carved through one wall and caused that

to fall off to the side, and leading to the very end of it, you saw an essential. that went to another exit grate into the city, a number of bodies, one large kind of webbed mass of looked to be a few bodies, and one individual that looked to be still alive, though unconscious and webbed against the wall. So.

Is bacteria, are we gonna reachable? From you right now, he's about 20 feet ahead of you. Oh, yeah, he's still 20 feet away. You guys, hey, fuckers, little worried about walking any further because my feet are starting to stick to the ground like a lot. Okay. But there's a halfling stuck to the wall over here,

and I don't think he's dead. Okay, you stay there with the halfling. I might be able to negotiate my way a little further. Is Jester right up with the halfling? No, I'm 20 feet away from it still. And if you had to ballpark the distance to the halfling or the very end of it, from you guys altogether, it's about 25 feet.

Oh, we're close. 30 feet. Jester is a little bit closer. All clear in the back! I forgot him. I am going to join knot at the back. And keep an eye on the rear. No need.

And I'm... Make exception check. Geez, Louise. Ten. Okay, so Ford, you go ahead and shift around to join knot in the back, and you guys look off in that distance. You see nothing in the darkness behind you. Who else is doing what?

I am going to walk up to Jester. gesture and stand next to her. And then I'm going to send Schmidt forward to this heflin to try to maybe lift up his, he, it's, hey, I can't tell you. I've seen of this halfling. All right, so as... Also move forward next to Caleb. Okay. You move forward next to Caleb as well. You guys are finding yourself, your feet kind of sticking to the material of the floor webbing you approach. You watch as the head of this halfling is kind of pulled away from the smithing and lifted up. It is male.

Oh. You see what looks, actually, because you're still with Yasha in the back, you have, make a perception check. Oh, well, if I can't see. It's a low light beyond that, so you have to make a perception check with disadvantage. I've got dope goggles. Oh, well, okay. You can make a straight perception check. Yeah, but I would say if I can't see, if I knew I can see if I were really in this place instead of sitting.

You can't if Yasha comes closer, but Yasha is the only source of white. If I couldn't see coming up, I would go for the, um, and send out the dancing lights. Natural 20. There you go. Okay. You, as the dancing lights appear in the air and begin to drift and kind of help fill out the air,

your torch light still being this larger beacon of flame light in the space, but you glance ahead and can see, as the chin has lifted, a thick band of tattoos. Guys, I think these goggles are polarized. They're real cool. It's got a thick band of tattoos, sorry. A thick band of tattoos that completely encompasses the neck. to the point where from what's exposed from beneath,

it's just like black shapes and designs completely around. Oh, the halfling. The halfling, yeah. Do they look old or like a fresher tattoo? Did you roll a natural 20? I did roll a natural 20. Your amazing monk-like sight. They look to be, they're not fresh.

They're okay, they're not fresh. They're not fresh. Do I see puncture wounds? You do not. Okay. Also, there's this kind of weird sense that creeps on knot and forward as you're glancing forward. And you both kind of turn over your shoulder

to see a massive, pale white and blue, arachnid creature, legs spindling outward a width of 10 feet or more, giant dripping fangs and like beady red eyes, a row of them glaring right at you as this, pincers open up. How close is it to you guys? It's right behind Ford and not, and it's striking you for it as its first strike.

Wait, so it's, it was behind them. It's literally here. Oh! Oh! Was it in the ceiling the whole time? What? That is gonna be a 23 to hit. Oh, no.

Against my 14? Yeah. While this death is happening, Caleb is making Schmidt go like this to the halfling. And Caleb's going, hey, guy. Hey, hey, hey, hey. Halfling. So you suffer seven points of piercing damage.

As its fangs snap right into your chest area. You still have ice armor on? I do, so he takes 10 points of damage. He takes 10 points. Man. The armor is gone. The armor is gone. I also need you to make a Constitution saving throw, please.

Oh, no. Shit. Coralysis. 17. 17. All righty. So you feel venom. Pulse into your body.

Your physicality, however, being somewhat sturdy, manages resist a large element of the poison that is suddenly thrust into your torso. So you take, it's a terrible roll. You take five points of poison damage. Okay. Not you look up and see this thing as it just digs its giant pincers and fangs into Ford's body, and it pulls back, and immediately you watch it, vanish and disappear. I need you all to roll in this one. Oh, no.

Liam knows what these are, but Caleb doesn't all know. To be fair, invisible spiders are the best spiders because you can't... Hey, look. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, look at the webs. And they're like, oh. Why are we invisible?

When not in the visible, those are dead people. Oh, damn. Of course we were up. Shit-assed bitch. Nipples on a horse. So the last place you saw this. The invisible, the people that are on the walls.

The last place you saw it was there. Before it disappeared. Wait, where? Where? Where? Before disband? Right there. Wait, why are the other things invisible? Does that mean those are other things that are going to attack? These are all the bodies that have been webbed up. Sucked dry. Oh boy.

The shells. What if he makes them? All right. So, initiative order for you guys, please. 25 to 20. Okay, okay. Nice. Oh, god damn. He has it was old time. All right, just is up front of 20.

All right, just was up front of 22. 20 to 15, guys. 15, 15. I have 15 as well. All right. Nobody has higher than a 15? That is shit. I had a 22.

Yeah, I mean, besides . All righty. So I was 10 to 15? 15. 10 to 5. Oh, I'm sorry. Yeah, 10 to 15. I'm 13.

13 as well. All right. All right. All 13. Both and? Molly. All righty, and 10 to five? Eight, or seven, I'm sorry. Five. All righty.

Good, separated from everyone. You always have the shittiest initiative. So do I, I, I know, why do you guys always have bad initiatives? I know, that last one should have, was like, really tough. It's true. Weird. All righty. So, the top of this round, Jester, you're up first.

I'm up first. Okay. Did I hear it happen before? Did I hear anything? No. Well, you hear like, oh, just the reaction of pain, and you glance over just in time to see. large, monstrous spider body just vanish in place.

Oh no! Ah! I'm probably screaming. And not is just... Ah! Ah! I guess they're! Yes!

Boo-do-do-do-do-do. Oh no. She's got some. I've got some, but you have one too, don't you? We have a couple of... Oh, do you have one? No, no, no, you have the one. Don't you have the one?

You have a one with a stand. That Brittany made? Yes, but it appears to... Years to have been moved since they used the table last time. Oh, well. Somebody took a picture of it and then disappeared it. It might have happened, yeah. Well, I'd make a giant teal lollipop instead.

Here you go. Oh, there it is. All right, so where shall we place this? Directly overhead of where the spider disappeared. Okay, we'll put it there. And then... It worries me to... I've got to unveil that and let's turn that around.

Yeah. Does anyone know where the lollipop is? It's fine. All right, so, so gesture, you use that as your bonus action to cast. Yes. What are using your action for? I'm going to, oh god. I'm going to cast, I'm going to cast

sacred flame just on the place that it was at. Can I do that? Sacred flame is Kendrick? Yeah. You can, sure. just on the place that I saw it. Okay. So you watch as the large light of hop

apparates in that space, and you cast sacred flame, it has no target to effect. It just kind of. It's not invisible, guys. It's just, it's gone. Nothing happens? No.

There's no burst of flame. The spell just has no target. I'm gonna back up against, oh no. If I back against a wall, it's sticky, isn't it? I mean, the space, all this area here, wherever the webbing starts, is considered rough terrain to move through. So your speed is half moving through that area. I'm going to take a couple steps if I can just like up on those rocks next to Yasha is that? Yeah, it's Yasha. You should probably clump together.

Okay, so you back up onto the rocks and kind of start pulling your feet out of the webbing as you do. Manifax, it would be all the attack. I saw one for a second. That ends your turn? Yes. Okay, and Jester's turn. Caleb and Ford, you guys are up. Yeah, can I get either inside or behind that crate

that's in the corner? Over here? Yeah, with difficult terrain. 10, 15, 20. That's as far as I. You can get, you can't climb into, well, you know what, I'd say you can start to get into it. You're not, doesn't offer you any cover at the moment,

but you're like, you're kind of in it right now. Okay, and I would like to use, okay, So for an action, I am going to cast the blur spell on myself again. Okay. And I will use my bonus action to have Schmidt come. I'm assuming he's not affected by webs. I don't know. Well, then I will summon him to stand above me on the box.

Okay. Yeah. Okay, so I'm blurry and there's an invisible guy. Okay. And in Caleb's turn? Yeah. All right, so you work on blurring and shifting. Okay.

Okay, can I spin back after getting bitten by a goddamn spider? Can I back up, five, ten, fifteen, twenty. Mm-hmm. Does that cause anything to hit me? Nope. Cool. I don't see nothing, right? Apparently no. Nice. Can I just fire Eldridge Blast in the direction that I saw it? You can?

Yeah. Make a little man-attack roll? 17. It hits the stonewall behind it. It's not. the stone wall behind it, it's not there. It moved! So you get the sense that it's not apparently there. All right. I need to see it to do anything else.

All right. That ends your turn. That brings us to, all right. So. Make a new? I thought you don't know. The spider is in between Ford and Bo. Between Ford and Bo.

The spider's in between Ford and Bo. I thought Travis would make the note, but he's not. He's busy. Just dropping in. There is a moment, 40s. You back up after releasing your other blast where it impacts the wall and you're like, shit. And you hear this sound and look to your right and it just appears right next to you. Where?

Oh, he's not invisible. That's so scary. As it lunges out towards you again. Oh no. Yes we do. And we need to clump. All right. Shit, that's another 23, 19s in a row.

Yeah, I mean, you don't even tell you. That is eight points of piercing damage. I need to make a Constitution saving. Damn! Oh, gosh. How many? Ooh, eight damage? Oh, buddy.

Okay, that's an eight. That's a lot of dice. All right, so that you take 15 points of poison damage. Okay. That's all of the poison d'is. I'm unconscious. No, no, no. Rettless in the thing, I got the thing, I got the thing.

Yeah. Relatless. Relatless. Yeah, half-orthy. Sorry, I'm half down. So, as the fangs dig in to the side of your tree, you pull back and try and defend yourself, and it pierces your leather armor in your torso

and releases a huge burst of venom into your chest. You feel your lungs and heart seize for a moment, and you almost fall back, and that burning orchish rage from underneath gives you that last bit. of inspiration to shrug off the poison and look back angrily and realize you're in deep shit. Oh, fuck. There you go, Freemason. He's actually a half-work. All righty.

Oh, God. So that ends its turn. That brings us to Bo and Molly. Do you want to go first? You can go first. Is there a way I can, can I kind of top-fold over the web situation? Yes. It's been bothering you this whole time. I don't need this whole time.

I meant to fix it in the break. Laura Bailey, the kind of friend that tells you when you have a booger and you knows. I really appreciate it. It's really good. Can I jump this gap kind of where Molly is and avoid the webbing? You can certainly try.

Go ahead and make an athletics check. Okay. Because you are standing in webbing, so it's being able to. Natural 20. Yes. I will say yes, I will give you the ability to leap through and land off to this side

using your movement and avoid Avoid that 10 feet and still manage to free yourself from the webbing. So you still have, that was 15 feet of your movement used to leap in the lane. So I have 25 more feet. Can I get, how close can I get to the hospital? Let's give it a shot. I mean, Beau is pretty fucking amazing. All right, so that was here.

In combat, yeah. 25, you're not quite close enough. That was a fucking bitch of a turn. I know, I don't have anything to do. I have any, I don't have any reach from a stick. No. Stick, stick, stick. You have whatever.

Whatever other multiple abilities you have. But we have eyes on it now. You have eyes on it at the moment. I will hold, I will take a dodge action, I guess. Okay. So you start defending yourself, preparing for its onslaught. All right, that brings me to Molly's turn.

I'm going to head towards the spider as close as I can get. And there's not a lot I can do. 30, yeah, you're right there. I'm going to use devil's tongue. I'm going to use vicious mockery. Okay. So. It rolls a national 19 on its saving throw.

It's like three 19s in a row that's rolled, by the way. You know something you do a cold, Molly. Of course the road. What days are you using? Well, the last two I was using the golden snitch. This one I used a blackie tony. Yeah. He took a person's gold win.

No, it was gifted to me at the end of the last campaign. Was it? It was gifted. It was gifted. Or did you throw it on the table and Matt snatched it up? We are golden gods. We are golden gods. You must invite the vampire in for it to cross the fresh.

I have made a terrible mistake. So Molly, you've moved up there. You're still 10 feet away from this creature. I am, I've, like, other than that, I've got my, yeah, I'm just going to hold. All right, so you're holding an attack for the second that it's within. It shows up?

Okay, so you're holding your action in case it shows up within range to strike it. Okay, good to know. That finishes their turn. Yasha, you're up. Okay. Can I get to it? What's your speed? 30 feet. 30 feet? No.

No. Oh no, that's the second time. It's happened. 25. 30. Yes. Yes. Oh, wait, did you? Okay, so I would like to rage.

Yeah. I do it. Okay, so I would like to rage. You see if it spins around after Molly screamed at it, it goes, ah! You can see, and as your torch light, as you're clutching in your hand, as you rush towards it, you're gonna have to drop that torch to grab your two-handed weapon. Yeah.

So you just drop it on the ground, and you see as it hits the ground, the light kind of flickers off of its eight red, beady eyes. And it turns, its fangs open towards you, you see the venom and bits of forward blood dripping off of the end of its curb as you rush towards it. All right, so you rage. What do you do? Rage, take out my sword and just try to between the eyes. Go for it. Go for attack. Okay.

Between the answer. Okay. 23. 23 hits, going more damage, yeah. So, uh, is it right there? Oh, it's D12 for your great sword, plus whatever your strength and rate. Oh, 2d6 plus 3. Oh, that's the grace suit, yeah, because D12 is great acts.

So 2d6 plus 3 plus whatever your rage damage bonus, which I think is 2, right? Ah. A airplane. Yeah, this is the second. It is, uh... It might auto if you select your range, might auto add. Yeah, she didn't get it to session zero. Yeah, it's plus two.

So it's plus five damage to whatever you roll. Yeah! Not plus five to whatever I roll? Yep. Okay, so 14. Fourteen points of slashing damage. Fuck yeah. As you rush towards it with a large arc, slamming down where you watch as you carve through part of its...

Strong. You watch as two of the eye. You watch the two of the eyes are just cloven through and are now bloodyed ruin. It shrieks back. It's hurt, but it's still doing fine. It's at the end of your turn. Yeah, because I can't do anything else, right? Okay, I just stand there at the ready with the point.

Got it, not you're up. Okay. I'm going to, I'm going to just shout out, I think this is the monster! And I will nervously fire my hand. crossbow at the beast. Hoping not to hit any of my friends. 12 plus something? Six. 18. That hits, roll damage. Okay. And you do sneak attack. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 14 plus Fury of the Small, 17 points. The, as it opens its mouth, you can see the firelight from the torch just kind of flickering in.

You can see this is horrible kind of weirdly shaped spider like mutated mouth open. up for Anli where the pincers and the giant fangs are, and a bolt just sinks into its throat and it immediately starts, streaking back, we're backing up defensively, the pain causing it to almost pull away from you. That's a serious amount of damage. Yeah. All right. I scramble away towards that, away towards in Caleb's direction. All right. And then that cocoon guy there. There. I'm going to hide right behind. Okay. You use the hide.

Wait, stealth check. Okay. 15. All right, good to know. All right, the finishes, Nuts' turn. Jester, you're up. Okay, can I come around the corner and get out of this nastiness? Ooh, I really did stick to it. You really did stick to it.

Okay. All right, 10, 15. It's so sticky. Sticky floor. Can I see everything? Yes, you see right where everyone is and where this creature. Okay, I'm going to send my spiritual weapon down there to bash it over the head. Five, ten, fifteen, twenty. It cannot quite get into range.

How did Yasha get all the way there and my thing didn't get there when it was like... Because you can only move 20 feet. That's so stupid. Okay. I believe that's the case. Yeah, it's only 20. And then I'm going to use cure wounds. Is it touch?

Cure wounds is touch, I believe. Motherfucker! You look. Yeah, but it's like dog shit. Oh, look at that. Does it sparkle? It's got a little spark. It's got a little spark.

There it is. There it is. It really ties the sewer together. I think so. There it is. Healing word is just such dog shit as far as like the what it can do. Healing word? No, it's not.

Sure, whatever. All right, I guess I'll do healing word so to cure you. But you're gonna go down again. It's not enough to heal you. I'm gonna take a healing potion. Oh, you are? Do your thing. Or do damage.

I'm going to, I'm going to, I'm sorry you guys. I'm going to sacred flame it then. Okay. So what's the... One of the 8th radiant. Well, it needs to make a saving throw, right? That is a 11. Yeah, 11. I think your DC is 13, right?

Yeah, so you go and roll damage. Yeah, okay. Get it. Two. Two. Hey, it all helps. A burst of radiant flame all of a sudden encompasses the front part of its body. Between the impact of the bolt, the slashing from Yasha and the blast, it looks like it's

in the moment starting to feel a moment of fight or fight. So then your turn? Fight or flight? Yeah, it does. All right. Caleb Ford, you're up. Okay, I can see a straight line from the spider to me, so I think... It does have partial cover, though, because of the angle you're at. Yeah, okay.

All right. So I'm going to use my movement to crawl out of the box. Okay. So I can get a better beat on it, hopefully. I'll go as far forward and to the side as I can to get a better angle. 10. 15, 20. I just want to improve my sight lines. That'll improve your sight there.

Okay, so, all right, so I am going to steady my arm against the other arm and point at it, and blacken my hand and send a firebolt at it. All righty. Here it goes. We'll see if it hits, probably not. No, I don't think it does. That is 11. 11.

That unfortunately does not hit. It goes wild. As it's reacting from the impacts, you watch as it begins to rear back, and as it does, there's this one flash of light. It seems like it notices its presence and gets really low and flat. Suddenly its whole body, which is massive, just shrinks low to the sewer and passes overhead. It pops back up, ready. Okay, and then before the end of my turn, I'm going to...

And Schmidt silently comes up as close as he can get next to me. Okay. Okay, all right, that's your turn? Yeah. All right, so it's now the spider's turn. A horse turn. Oh yeah, that's right, even now. With my bonus action, can I cast Hexblade's curse

on the spider? Yes, you may. You should just kill it. Kill it. Kill it, leave. Don't worry about killing yourself. He's looking rough. Destroy it's hard.

And with the, with the fucking glove of blasting that we took off the- The thing, can I just go, and fire all three of the scorching ray balls at the spider? You may? Go ahead and make your three attacks with disadvantage, because it's a ranged attack in immediate base to base. All right. First one is what?

There's a nine plus two for 11. 11 misses. The first one goes wide, second strike. That's a one. Goes wide again. 16. 16 does hit. Your first time using the glove, you're not too sure how the aiming works and the first two just go off to the side, you're like, shit, shit, the third one

finally impacts. Goode roll damage for that? Oh man, that's that forward ed right there. That's right. Eight points of damage. Eight points of fire damage. Plus, does your ex-played's curse doing anything in that? Don't you add your, for something you've... Plus two to hit. Plus two to hit, that's it. No. No, I'm pretty sure. Attack roll, game bonus. Damage, damage two, for Thank you. So it's 10, right?

10, thank you. 10 points. All right. The second, the scorching ray blast hits it as it's kind of rearing up right now. And as it lights up, you can see the streaks of blue designs across its pale white body. The flames impact and burn around the side and it kind of pulls back, ready, angrily, back towards you. That needs your turn? Yeah.

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Oh, please, not that music. That music gives me nightmares from my childhood. Could we get something a little bit lighter? Some lighter music here. Are you a fan of true crime TV shows? And what about Unsolved Mysteries? The show that jumped started all of our love of true crime. I'm Ellen Marsh.

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So come and join us, wherever you listen to your podcasts. Yeah, it didn't happen. It's a liar. You're just going to kill the spider, and I'll be fine. It's fair. It's trying to decide what is. What is the biggest threat right now? I'm going to go in law for it, between Yasha and forward.

Schmidt, it's going to go for Yasha. Blood Maladek. I see a look at her and I immediately full blood Maladek. I'm going to do the truck top one and I'm going to take four points of damage for it. Okay. There you go.

I just have that moment, I look at it and my neck just bursts and I bleed out. You watch as a vein kind of cores on the side. And you watch as the, there's currently six intact red eyes the spider all kind of cloud over black with bits of trickling, dark, purplish blood pouring from the edges of them. Oh shit. That gives it disadvantage.

That gives it. Which you are very lucky it is, because that was a natural 20. That still comes to 16. Does that hit? That hits. All right, so you take, from the fangs as it lurches towards you. Yeah. That is going to be 11 points of piercing damage.

Halved. Yes, because you're raised. Yes. So five, you take five points of piercing damage. And I need you to make a Constitution saving throw, please. Oh no. Okay, okay, okay. You've got this.

Natural 20. Whoa! Crittle that shit! So you may as it lurches for it. It lurches forward and slams its fangs in the collarbone area, you having no real armored protected. You just take it head on. The fangs sink in and you feel the venom pulse through your torso through your arms. The burning pain goes through it and you just flex it off. As you do so, thankfully reducing what would have been you only take 11 points

of poison damage. Whoa. Sorry. Yasha is a heavy metal album. That's pretty dope. And as it now sees you all kind of moving around it and it looks like it's been hurting, you watch as its form just kind of, vanish. No!

In addition to the, okay, yeah. Fuck. And you watch as it just vanishes from the space. That's where you last saw it. Damn. Ending its turn, Bo and Molly, you're up. We killed it! BAMP.

BAMP. Yeah. Okay. Where is it gonna go? Let's form up. Let's form up. I'm gonna kind of split the difference and just kind of go. Don't get so far that we can't get to you if it hits you.

I'm not, I'm just going there because I still want to be able to get to it, and I'm going to hold a flurry of, can I hold like a key point action? Or can I just hold an attack? Or can I hold an attack and then decide I wanted to be a flurry of blows? You cannot make a bonus action attack on held actions. You cannot, unfortunately, make a furry-flurry blows, I don't believe, as a held action. But can I take it like the bonus, I can't take the bonus attack, like the bonus now? No. To do the key point and hold it? No, unfortunately. Okay. This is balls? This is balls, y'all.

Yeah, spider's an asshole. I'll hold until I see it to make an attack. Okay, so you're holding your action until it appears in a range. Good to know. All right, Molly. Say I'm sticking with everybody, and I'm, let me take one, where am I? Let me take like a step back and hold my action there. Okay. You step back and kind of stumble over one of the crown scarred bodies that you left on the ground, but you hold yourself there, kind of using it as one foot, slightly elevated platform being at the ready. So you're holding your attack action? Mm-hmm.

All right, that ends in small, go, Yasha, you're up. Oh, shit. Okay. It's gone, so we don't know where it is. It appears to have vanished. We don't see it. We don't see it. Okay. I feel like we should get closer or go.

All right, I'm gonna just move over to Ford. To there? Yeah, back against the wall. Okay. And... I know. Dund, do, do, do, do, do. I just move.

Um... Whee! I don't know. I think that's... Oh, can I do healing hands on my hands on my... Should I do healing hands on myself? Again, yes. Again, and I'll do healing hands on myself.

All right, so as the Asha backs up against the wall, great sword in one hand, you watch, she lifts her arm to her chest, and there's a faint glow of what looks to be kind of very, very faint whiteish energy, and her wounds slightly heal up slightly. What the love? You didn't have that, did you?

You didn't do that type of shit. No, she's the best of a zeal. Stuff. Anyway. Stuff. Yeah. Because reasons. Does that finish your turn, Yasha?

What's that called? What do I heal? Number of... Healing hands. It's called Princes of the Universe. Is someone gonna heal for? Yes, I'm going to... Okay.

I will... Oh boy. I will... I'll just stay put and hold my attack until I can see the whites of its pincers. Pinsers. Okay. And as a bonus action, I'll just cast a Mageehan and just start digging around some rocks,

see if there's over there. Well, yeah, because Mage hand is an action to cast, so you can't hold. Not anymore. Oh, no, with your lederman, right? Yeah. Is it? Is it? Leger to me?

I don't know. I'll still fricking it out. I'm kidding. You can use the bonus action, granted. by your cunning action to control the hand. Oh, but you cannot. It means once it's already out, you can do that to use the bone of attention,

but you have to go. All right, so you're holding your action to attack. I'm just holding my attack. Good to know, top the round, Jester, you're up. Okay, I'm going to, um, how far away are you? Okay, I'm going to move forward. Can I get all the way to Ford or should I, I'm afraid to get too far away from Caleb?

Twenty-five, you can get up to him. I don't need to heal you. I'm gonna heal you. It dies, okay, seven. Okay, well, good. You'll gain seven more. than I can heal you because I'm going to cast gear wounds on you! Yay!

Six points. You hope you. Thanks, Jester. How you want? You don't know me shit. You have done me shit. All right. You have done to do, move your spiritual weapon or anything?

I'm going to move my spiritual weapon just kind of like in the middle between every, like, closer to the bow. Okay, just like there? We're not considered poison if we got bit, right? No. All right, that ends your go, Jester. Caleb and Ford, you're up. Yeah, I would like to move, because sight lines are a problem here.

I would like to move to dead center where Jester just was actually, so I have a clear sight on the chamber behind me and ahead of me. Sorry, 25, 30? Yeah, so I can see everywhere more or less in here. I pull the diamond out from my coat, and I just get ready and I hold. And as soon as I see the spider, I'm going to release. these chromatic oop. Okay, good to know.

All right, then is your turn, Kilim, four, what you're doing? If I'd like to, I'd like to move. Closer to the group, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30, and I'll just turn here. And I will hold my attack. Okay. This comes in the range.

Yes. Good to know. Okay. So, and if your turn, you last year you saw it there, you watch us, there's a few. You watch as there's a faint ripple in the air. And as you had prepared just finishing healing forward as he runs past, you turn and smile and turn back just in time to see it.

Not far from where it vanished, appear right there. Damn it. It does get a surprise strike on you, which has advantage, disadvantage thanks to your last ability. So it's just a straight attack roll. That is a natural one. Yes. Wow.

Okay. That's okay. And it will use its movement. I say, ah, and I bring my shield up, right? To move back. Shit. And go up the wall here. What?

Whoa. I didn't die here. I'm going. All right. So, if we went by those rules, you guys would have been paid a long time ago. All right, so yeah, moves with the pole. You do get an attack opportunity on it, is you swing past.

So go ahead and make your strike. Okay. With you're somewhat web-covered. We got all of it off, remember? off, remember? Mm-hmm. Right. Slightly warm.

Toasted. We lose out on it. No, 17. 17 hits. And by the way, those of you that were in range to attack with that held action would have been just Caleb and not. So what you guys could have to do you're. Ranged? Oh, we were holding your attack, you said.

Yeah. Is that not a... Do I have to say range spell at you? You have to say what spell you're holding an attack or I'm holding a spell. Sorry. I've learned. Now you know. Seven damage.

Seven damage. Nice. All righty. Oh man, I prepped acid on this thing and I missed bad. I got a total of nine, so that did not hit. A total of nine? Yeah. Oh, that's nine. So, as you throw your orb, it skitters up the wall and you almost hit it, but it just pulls out of the way before it shatters the orb,

splattering acid across the stonework, like burning through whatever outer layer of thick liquid has kind of congealed there. For where I'm hidden to where it was when it appeared, how far is that? Would it appear that there have been 40 feet from you. So I have to roll with this advantage? Yes, you do. Ooh, not as good. 11. 11. Goes wide, no impact, unfortunately.

All right, that ends the spider's turn. Bo, Molly, you're up. Don't mug yourself. Can I close the gap with my 40 feet foot movement? Five, ten, 15, 20, 25, 30, 35, 40. 40. It's above you on the wall.

It's above you on the wall. That's a nine. Can I? Throw your throwing stars. You know, like I'm trying to get spiders out of the corner of your ceiling with a brisk. I'll tell you what. I'll give you the attack, you'll have disadvantage,

and if you miss your problem. But I'll give you the attack if you want it. I like the brisk. That's exciting. It's impossible. I like cats. There is a path that helps with that. You've only rolled three ones.

Of course I do. How many more could you have? So yeah, I'm gonna do the full on like. Glory. Get a wasp, get the wasp. All right, so you leap up to get your single attack on it with your bow. Go for it. Rolling the disadvantage. Disadvantage. Disadvantage. You're gonna get it. Disadvantage. You got it. I got it. 17. That's 21. That hits. Go and roll damage.

Yes. Don't move, don't move, don't move, don't move. Call it an exterminator. Okay. And 11. 11 points of damage as you leap and smooth. Smack it in the face. It pulls up a little bit further away, screeching at the impact. It's looking pretty rough. It's still all around, but it's that was not a positive hit for it. Do I have room to still get one more, like, SWAT? Probably not.

You give you the one. You're just out of range for you give you the one as part of the risk. All right, that in your turn? Yeah. Molly. I'm going to run up to, I'm going to at least run up to the other side of Jester. just to keep us clumped a little bit. Already?

And since I really, what I can do is I can do a vicious mockery again. So I'm going to cast vicious mockery and just you cut off the legs and give it a shot and make a roll against wisdom. You can say anything with that voice and it would sound. That is a 12. That is a 12.

I think it's a what you say. Save versus W. Your spell DEC would be eight plus your proficiency, which is ten, plus your wisdom modifier, which is what? Wisdom modifier is three. So yeah, that hits. Go ahead and roll damage. Aye, aye. Come on, come on. So that's a...

Mock him. All right, I mock him, and that's a... Mock him to death. That's three points of psychic damage, and he has... No, really, does it not even matter? And then he has a disadvantage on the next attack. How do you want to do? So you mocked the spider to death.

Something about my words are just making his blood boil. So as you screech out this phrase in infernal, You watch as its legs begin to skitter upward, and as it tries to escape up the top of the ceiling, it loses its grip upon the top of the sewer ceiling. It falls, slam, slamming onto the ground next to bone, and its legs begin to curl in as it's like shaking. You see blood pouring from wounds that weren't there before,

it seems the infernal itself has affected him physically from the inside as it begins to curl its legs in deeper and deeper, the sound of its guttural shrieking, getting softer and softer. I turn around and go, don't worry guys, I got it. Good all broomstick trick. It works every time. Put them in a mocking bag, Molly. I never had to do that before. I regained seven hit points. There you go. No, don't take it away. I'm going to lick it. Okay. It didn't hit anything, it's not even covered with any guts.

There's no poop. No poop. I go up and I give Molly a slap on the ass. Oh. That's what I mean. These people are fun. It's good. That's fun. Oh.

I'm going to go poke it with a sword. I'm going to go back to the halfling guy that's kind of a laugh. I'll accompany them. Okay. I'm gonna kill the head, no. So yeah, it is a large body. The actual kind of thorax of it. I'm gonna start binding it up,

binding it up for travel. Okay, yeah, easy enough to do. It's legs are intact, and they're sturdy enough. So you see, bring out whatever rope you have available, and you start binding it and getting it in a position where it could probably be like, either on her staff or whatever else you have to carry over shoulders.

Okay. As you guys approach the half-link, still unconscious, the arm kind of draped out from the webbing. Does he look injured at all? It's very dark still, also. It is very dark, and there's still this torch kind of left in the center there where Yasha dropped it.

Can I have grabbed that as I walk up to her? Sure. So you grab the torch and you bring it over to get a close look. There's the web mass in the corner, there's the other bodies in the side and the halfling. Looks to be injured in the sense that it looks like they took a blow to a head. There's like a slight bit of blood kind of trickle on the edge of the hair line. I put my hand on his head and cast cure wounds. Okay. So go ahead and roll for the hit points for you gained there.

Now, 11. Actually, since I see that Jester has this cupboard, I'm going to start burning out the dead people and are rooting for their pockets and stuff. Yeah, I'll still stick with Jester, though, just in cases. That's good. All right.

There's a moment after you finish casting it with the half-ling kind of shakes the head. What's going? Blessy child, you are alive. Your saviors have come. You see one eye is kind of almost still glued shut from webbing that's kind of across the front of it, but it's trying to open it.

I don't understand what's going on. You're safe now. Oh, God. Just looking around, looking up at the, well, you can see the faint bit of light now, which is it's now just passing sunset. You see the little bit of purple light coming through, and through the little bits of webbing.

You can see the grate that leads outside. He goes, I don't know how I got here. Here. You know how you got down here? You didn't come to the sewer on your own? I, yeah, I guess. What were you doing down here? Well, I was just, I was trying to get somewhere quickly.

Oh, really? Inside check. Make an inside check. You see flames bursting inside of the sight of the time he flinches. Uh, uh, uh, uh, 18. 18? Whispers? The whispers.

FIFFERS. Far Cry 5. What about it, Travis? Fantastic multiplayer. Yeah? An all new setting that takes place in the United States of America. Oh man. Full of lessons for America to die.

That's right. I would encourage you to check it out. Ubisoft's Harbock Five. I'm sorry. I've just, I've, oh God, and he looks over and sees like the other bodies in the wall and the webbing. He said, oh, oh God. Help me. Please help me.

You're gonna' out, don't worry. I'm only burning the dead ones. Pff! I'm curious. I'm gonna just say in Halfling to the man, it's okay, just calm down, everything's gonna be fine, and I start cutting him out. You're nods.

Thank you. And back to you in a Halfling, as being to cut him free. What'd you say? I'm gonna kind of tap it into my background a little bit, gonna go, you know, I used to utilize the sewers back in the day. Real good, stay out of sight, move stuff quickly. You know, it's important when you're an ale hand.

You know, you've got to move things, product through the sewers quickly. What you're moving? Ale. Okay. Do you have a key to the grates? Not a key, but I have a key. Can you go on lock, me? I have a key.

Can you give us the key? I have to cut me free first. Before we do that. What's your name, friend? Ted. Ted. Dead? Fed.

I really thought you said dead. Fed is dead, baby. Fed is dead, baby. Ted, where is the key? Which pocket is it in? I'll just happy to show you once you cut me free. I can start digging and I start digging through his pockets. I'm making an investigation check.

I know. At a closer look to, you see it's got short, spiky, dark hair, and a little bit of a goatee that's kind of trimmed to a point at the end of the chin, and the tattoos all across the neck look like their almost like swirl of serpentine shapes that all just kind of fold and not together all across the throat from front to back, like a giant dark band. That's a tattoo you said?

That's a tattoo, yeah. Would I recognize that iconography or have heard of that? Does that mean anything? Make an intelligent picture. It's a naked black tattoo. Kill him. Nope, that's a big, nope, that's a natural one. Yeah, you don't.

Okay, you cut him freezing. Thank you. I rolled an 11 checking through his pockets. Okay. You do find he has, he's wearing some nice black, gray leather armor. He has kind of a pretty nasty looking short sword. It looks like it's been altered to be kind of jagged at the edge of the blade. He has like some sort of a small leather case that's kind of tucked in the armor. Don't find a key.

Jagged at the tip. What's in that leather case? Do you have the stuff or did you? He's like, he's free now. He's kind of free and he's like, and he stands up and kind of writes himself and checks everything. And he looks to the left from him and goes, and he points to that kind of mass in the corner and you see the mass that's there. It's not a series of bodies. It looks like it's a slowly pulsing sack of some kind. Oh, no, eggs.

Ooh. Oh no. Oh, no. Molly. Fire, fire. Fire. Fire. Fire. Fire. I hit the sacred flame. Yeah. Okay. With a torch throwing and landing the sacred flame kind of igniting it, you watch as this cluster begins to burn, as a bunch of these tiny white and blue spiders begin to expand out the side. Some of them kind of make it up the side to the wall. I hate spiders. You rush up and crush a couple of them.

Even in baby size, they're about that big. So they're all coming up, but they begin to burn. Try to kill them all. You go and start burning. It appears like you've got them all. Some of them seem to have burned, some of them seem to have vanished. It's hard to tell. So.

Yeah. No, I just hear the commotion. and come halfway over and nothing seems to you're just burning spiders. And Caleb is just blithely like burning over here, is no idea what's going on. You are checking the bodies for things, right? Of course I am. I'm waiting for the DM to fill in the blank glass.

Well, that's fine then. So yeah, if you go into the other bodies, you get two sets of Crowns Guard armor and two long swords, the Crowns Guard. Okay. I'll add that into the bank. Yes, the challenge. Right, so for those.

I don't ask you, sorry. No, the total between those two was 15 gold, 60 silver, and 20 copper. Smart that. Just keeping all that for yourself then? Two, three, four, five bodies. I've not forgotten them all, but are there any coin purses as well? You do, and you go through, and it'll take you a little while to go through all the bodies here. So we'll get to see how many you get through here.

Do you say two sets of armor? Do you fit in the bag? Would that fit in the bag? Two sets of armor? Well, I believe it would, because it's kind of a volume space thing. It'll take up a lot of space with them. You have two foot by two foot spaces on the two sides, and then you have the main eight foot cube section there.

Okay, we'll bring these back to the crown scar and hopefully get some reward. All right. You do find another pair of studded leather armor that has like a sea motif to it. There's what looks to be like shells kind of pressed into it, and looks like a wave pattern on the edges.

The person that it's attached to has a bunch of tattoos across their body as well that appear to insinuate a lot of time at sea, different names of different ships that are different points that faded in the body. They may have been a sailor at some point in their life, and it has expired under here. Yeah, I will quietly gather that up

and put it into my bag. Okay. Well, the armor's a full set. Am I able to carry that? I don't even know. Yeah, I mean, it's a leather chest plate, leather are kind of arm bands and braces and then leg plates as well, so it's a full set.

You could probably fit all that into your bag if it's the only thing it's in your bag. Okay. Okay. So you can stuff it all in there. And beyond that, going through them, just for the sake of everybody here, you find an additional 85 gold pieces,

210 silver, and 45 copper. 85, what was this? Gold. Yeah, 85 gold. 210 silver. Okay. 45 copper. Is everybody a greedy fuck in this game

and we just keep whatever we find? I'm not telling you that I found that at all. Cool. He dies first. We see him collecting everything anyway. Yeah. If you guys are all talking to this guy, Caleb is going from body to body,

putting everything at this point. It's not being seen. Standing, like right over looking down, you're feeling of the body. No, but we're all of the same breed. They don't know what you found or what you have, but they know that you're gathering stuff. You know what I found.

Sorry, just the, sorry because everyone is so lovely. Can you tell me those? $210.85? Gold pieces, 210 copper. So, 2212 silver, and 45 copper. Okay. How many people were? Vex never mind about.

I don't give a fuck what Vex did. Ever once. all the shit she got for being greedy. She never once lied about the loop. She was a horrible person. She's a terrible, terrible. Vex is retired in White Stone right now. She's not here.

Sensing a lingering sibling rivalry. I know. Carried over. It's hanging over the table. I'm clearly lawful good. Clearly. What's that doing? Well, he's kind of checked all this thing.

He goes, OK. Well, I thank you all so much for your help. I really appreciate it. You've saved my life. I'm gonna kind of do that laying up against the wall thing over top of home. As he's doing this, he kind of smiles. He's missing two teeth at the side,

and he has a septum piercing up in his nose that he kind of writes and pulls back down again so it's visible, and he's like, all right. You're real, uh, that's cool. Real thankful. Yeah? Real grateful. I gotta get some help with this.

I feel like we did you a good service today. I'd happily pay you, but your friend already took all my money. I didn't take anything from you. I just want one. I didn't take anything from his pockets. That's what he's saying. I just want something in return. You know, you provide a service.

You get something in return, right. If I can be of service, I'd be happy to. Who's the gentleman? I don't know what you're talking about. Oh. Oh, friend. I heard a gentleman I'm walking over. Oh, friend.

I don't need a roll an inside check to know that's bullshit. I apologize. I apologize. I don't. I apologize. I don't know. I don't know what you're talking about. I. I'm gonna, I get closer to Thed and say,

in thieves can't. Yes. You can trust us. We're one of you. Make persuasion. Yes, yes. Natural's one. Yes.

Yes. He glances down at you. It looks kind of taken aback. and returns to you in Thebes Canton and says, and the rest of your compatriots, they're cool. Switching back to Kauny's. Look, I cannot tell you anything,

except for if you want to find him, there is a place you can inquire. If I give you any more information and that gets around, I am deader than that spider would have left me. Where do I inquire? Sides for a second. There's a dive, not but five blocks from here called the evening.

Don't say his name. Just walk up to the old man behind the counter and mention you'd like a drink. And while you have no coin, you'd be willing to offer many gifts. I'd like a drink. I have no coin, willing to offer many gifts. No coin.

Many gifts is the important part. Now, I hope that's been of service. And I, as you seem to be the types who see it fit to save a person you haven't met in the bottom of a terrible sewer, I would hope that you would be kind enough to know that that information did not come from me and that you've never seen me before in your entire life.

Oh, what's your name? His name was dead. Of course, from we've never seen you before in our entire life. Because I haven't seen you either. I didn't take anything from your pockets. I really didn't. Is anything about his tattoo irritate me? It's not very well done.

You know what I mean. Yeah. No. All right. Okay. Do you have like a key to the great stuff? You don't know. You don't know. I mean, he kind of looks up behind him, says,

I've got mine, but I need it from work. That's fair. I'm pretty sure we can just call for someone with us. And he glances over towards a knot and says, and unless I'm mistaken, it appears you have a female friend here who could probably help you get around that anyway. I could try. Anyway, I bid you all I do.

and he kind of pulls his hood up over his head, and his little halfling feet quickly carry him back in the direction where you guys travel to the sewer. Watch out for poo rats. I'm aware. How many of these victims were, other than Crownsguard? Any civilians or women children? No children.

One of them appears to be a woman in her 40s or so. A lot of them appear to be dressed in heavy leathers. They may have been, they're coming through to try and clear up parts of the sewer, some of them may have been, some of them would look to be very poor, and may have come down here in hopes of scavenging whatever had fallen down into the sewer and kind of just collected over time.

Some of them appear to be similarly dressed, as said, or at least have a somewhat skulking type demeanor about their wares. Are you any neck tattoos that look like serpents? No. Okay. Yeah, but there were a handful of it that also like they would probably have traveled this route before

it got caught up in it. What would we find on the bodies? Sorry. No. Oh, go ahead. Yeah, what do we find? There was a bunch of weapons and armor. Nice.

And some coin. Anything unique? Any unique things? Why don't we get into some daylight and take a look? Sure. Yeah. We should recognize her to look. We might have to look at what we have. Anything else interesting in the room, outside of the bodies?

Outside of the bodies, it looks like there is broken bits of, would have been furniture or a cart at some time. They got discarded or shoved down here from above. Other than that, just the general refuse you've come across. Do you have a spider body to pet? Can I happen to see, am I able to see the guy with all the tattoos of ships and stuff? Yeah, you see him.

Oh, cool. Do I recognize any of the names of ships or any imagery? Make an investigation check on them. 11. Okay. Looking about them, and from when you can rummers through, he's pretty much naked other than his Zundaroos. 12. Okay.

Looking through, there's like the Midnight Lorry. You don't recognize that name at all. The sort of them that's the shell carrier. Don't recognize that one. There is one name that catches your attention. It was called the Pink Giver. And it came through your port at one point. You just helped.

You remember coming into port. You were paid to kind of take care of it, offload things back on. The name itself was derived by a wooden carving at the front bow of the ship. that was of a mermaid where their arms extended, that was gifting what looked to be a human heart. That was painted with this kind of vibrant pink color

that was kind of its signifying visual. But yeah. Other than that, I mean, nothing particular about it, just that you were like, oh, I asked, I know that ship. Is the broken howl on there? Oh. It's on the back. Throwback.

That looks like a picture. He's like a piece of shit. Continuity. Roll for continuity. Bow turns to nine. Hey girl. Yeah. That little code you were talking.

See any of that written around these walls or something that looks similar to it? I can look around. Thieves can't is a written or a spoken thing? It's almost universally spoken. And as a language, it's used for extended ciphers. Make an investigation check. Can I, can I, like, help them out, see if I, like, spot anything? Give an assisted roll.

You can, if you want to assist him. Can I assist? So you have advantage on it because she's opening you. 19. Okay. Glancing about, you can see behind the rungs, there's about a two inch gap across the wall. There is a very, very faint scratch into it.

That just says, although not referring directly to yours, it says money pot. Money pot? Yes. It says money pot. What is that? What is that? You catch you off guard because you're like, that's one of our...

It's one of our one shots. It's one of our things, but that's not that it can't... It's not us. We weren't down here before, were we? Inside check. I wonder if this great leads up into the Tri-Spider then. Maybe it just means lots of rich people are up here. Maybe.

Maybe this is the name, maybe they've named all the entrances and exits are. or something like that. Easy pickings. They've buried something here. Oh, that's a good idea. If they don't allow the criminals in, then they'd be real easy to pickpocket because no one would expect it.

Yeah. Hmm. One way to find out. Should we try to jimmy this lock and get out? Well, we can probably call up. We have the it. Okay. But do we need to get the spider first?

Well, it's all tied up. Me and Yasha can probably, yeah. I'll put a little bundle on my staff as well. Burney Pop. Jester, will you come look at my eyes? I feel a little bloodshot. I'm not feeling well after my encounter with the Reds. Sure, I put my hands on either side of his face.

Can I see anything weird? We come over here. I'm walking over with us too. Come over here and I walk away from the group. I don't know if she follows me. I do, I do. There was gold in there. I would like you to have it.

It's more than I had before. Here is a hundred gold where all those people. So you take it because I know that you need money. Caleb, I don't. I know that you need money. And I'm very, you know, look at this. And I do a little joke. Those are really, really strong.

You look super strong. That's sad and funny at the same time. You carry the gold because I can't carry it all. Okay, but I'm not keeping it just for me, you know. That's fine. It's for both of us. Yeah, well that's why you wanted money for, I assume from your mother was to help us out in the position we are in.

Of course. Yeah, so you take this, you're a better, you know, I'm always thinking about things and I'm not very good with amounts and money. So you carry it. Okay, love, I'm sorry. You know, I just had a really bad day today, that's all it was.

Okay. I guess I'm sorry as well. Do you need curing, though, because your eyes do look kind of bloodshot? No, that was, I'm fine. I'm fine. I'm going to stare at the wall because I don't know how to deal with attention very well. All right, well, this is happening. What are you guys doing? I'm waiting for them to break up, and I suppose we're packing the spider up to bring you... And I really hide the money that I found. Yeah.

Yeah, I'm good. I'm good. I'm taking at least one button off of every single person in the... Okay, easy enough to do. You got quite a collection going. Yeah. All right. I'm just waiting.

All right. You guys have reconvened. You've gathered your things. The spider has been kind of, all the legs have been pulled up and wrapped and you have, you could use either bow staff or something else to go ahead and lift it with on both sides, because it's pretty heavy. It's going to take two of you to carry. All right, we'll carry it.

Yeah. Yeah, and you would have to be you too. It's pretty strong. So the two of you go, lift it and lift it and Oh my gosh, yes. All right, so where are you guys going? Because you have big lollipops. Oh, we gotta go up.

Yeah, up these things up into the money pot. Okay. So who's going up first? Yeah, super good. Somebody that can talk to the guards. I'm not a hoot. I don't know, guys. All right, I'll try. Oh!

I'm stuck down us! As you climb up, not look through. The sun is set and the night has gone purple to dark navy blue as that has taken it. You glance up through and you're looking out into a dark alleyway. You just see two sides of an alley, shaded in dark, about maybe 25 feet ahead, it opens up into a fine cobblestone road.

You can see fine buildings across the way. You see the lanterns are light in the center of the town. You have not been at this part of the town, but it's pretty well kept, and no one seems to be immediately around to hear you. Is it locked? It is locked. Can you pick the lock? Oh, yeah.

So go ahead and make a lock-picking check. What is that sleight of hand? No, no, it's your thieves tools, so it's proficiency bonus plus your deck's bonus. Dex bonus is four, proficiency is three plus 12. Two, isn't it right? Yeah, I think it's just two right. Oh, it's just two? Okay. So there should be six.

18. 18. Takes a moment and you kind of have to reach around the other side and kind of, it opens up and the bars kind of push open. The gap here into the back of this alleyway is about two feet tall. So each of you can get out comfortably that spider is going to need some squeeze and. We'll give it a push.

Let's see it going to move it up first. All right, you guys, just one by one. back top side, manage to push it through. It damages the body, parts of it kind of break and slide it off. It's not designed to fill through that space, but it's still mostly intact. I'm imagining like the Play-O-Fun Factory. Not quite that bad, not quite that bad, but it definitely doesn't look as pretty on the other side. I came back just for a second and wait, and I very quickly just gently socially pin Caleb to the wall. Face to face as awkwardly

close as I can get. Definitely not looking at you on the end. No, you're not. Okay, hello. I'm fine if you skim something off the top. That's fair, but be clever about it. Just distribute 60, 70% of what you find. Okay, good boy.

Give him a little slap on the face and I go up. Okay. Nothing for me. Okay. So you all eventually gather up to the top, the street side. It's completely dark, the night skies above you. You can see the warm lantern light across the various street intersections and along the path in front of the various buildings. You

definitely recognize this gesture. This is indeed the Tri Spire District. This is one of my hotel is. Oh, well, wouldn't the plan to have a, what'd you call it? Room party! What time of the day is it? It is night. It is freshly night. The sun set. But what time of the day is it because I know. Party time.

Very, very close to what time it is. I know sun down, sunup. Sunup? Yeah, it's sundown. It's about, I'd say, the time it took for you guys to scavenged the body, it's about 30, 40 minutes after the sunset completely. What time does the sun? Jesus Christ. Garmin over here. Yeah. Is it, okay. It's fine. It's fine. Does it look dark? Of course I am.

We can't ask Siri here. We don't know. What's the latitude? The latitude is Siri. You guess it's... Does it look like stores are open? That's all I'm asking. Yeah, probably. Okay. This district, I mean, shops are still open past sundown for a little bit, but later in the evening it gets many of them close down. Some shops stay open later, you don't know.

Let's go to this room party you were talking about. Wait, to get the spider inside the hotel will need a clever disguise for it. A hat, a beard, perhaps. To the call, yes, I'll get down my disguise kit and put a mustache on the spider. Yeah, also not mask up for sure, yeah. Oh, oh, yes. Maybe earmuffs, it's very cold. I could do a spell and make myself look like someone else. How about, that did not work very well for me several hours ago. I think maybe you want to use tangible things here. Use the earmuffs, use the hat, use the mask.

Mascanyin muffs should make me look just perfect. You also have a hood, so it's night time with the hood up in the dark. I like it. It's really bright and shiny in the hotel. You raise a good point, not. If we for some reason get caught being where we're not supposed to, I think that writ only allows us to kill this beast and return it for the coin.

I would not want to gamble with our reward of 700 gold. Oh. Perhaps we should leave and collect our reward and then find our revelries elsewhere. I mean, to be fair, we know how to get here through the sewers now. We can always come back. This is a good point.

Should we just not? Make it straight. I know we'll just go straight and just stay. As the bee flags. Yeah, let's just go straight out and leave and go to the Crown's Guard. Okay. Yeah, the King's Hall.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Maybe we should set the gate up and then lock it. Good idea. So they don't know. So you remark it, you close it, you guys step out into the main street and you go about,

bearing direction, and you've traveled through here before, you immediately kind of, oh that, that's where the nearest exigate in the direction of the hall would be. You guys get about a block before two of the patrolling Crowns Guard kind of stop and look at this troop of people walking with a giant brutalized spider, bright white and blue, and immediately kind of jogs up both of them to come aside. Excuse me, what are you doing here?

Oh, yes, don't worry, we're staying at the pillow trove, but we have this very beautiful red. takes the writ and they both look at it. The other one has his hand on his side of his blade, kind of each, looking very closely at each of you. And you are a motley lot. Going through all of you, kind of sneering a bit in the direction of Caleb.

I have a good on. Yeah? Nice close. Looking at a bit frightened at the vision of Yasha and confused at the side of Mollymok. It finishes reading the writ and forth. Okay, very well, but we will escort you to the gates and you can continue this on to the hall.

Thank you. How did you get this in here? Oh, we are really powerful. We're the mighty nine. We killed it. We took care of the monster problem. Looks back at the other guard, and they share a brief glance. Right, very well.

Well, let us leave then. and they just escort you towards the entrance, the opening gate where you guys had passed through. You move through and out into the intersted sprawl, at the exact gates where you had entered, or you had entered and you had attempted the night before. I also turned to one of these guards and say, excuse me, could you appoint me where we are right now?

Which way to the nestled nook from here? You heard of this, so. I didn't... The nesled nook, you say? You don't know. I don't have to pretend with me, it's fine. He points over that way. He goes, to the south side of the Silicon Terrace,

look for the small greenish, kind of a hot-looking building. Thank you. We're going to clean up. We'll be back. This is not normally how we dress. We were in the sewers. They escort you out. Kind of get you quickly out of the district,

carrying a giant, bloody, awful-looking spider. As you're making your way, you can see some of the folks that are walking through start gasping at the sight and whispering to each other and pointing. Some begin to approach, and somebody else grabs the shoulder and pulls them back. You kind of become this slow moving sight through this district.

Yeah, mine to nine, stay back. Nine. Nine. All right, you guys eventually make your way back to the hall. This language. Yeah. So you're outside the King's Hall.

As you approach, some of the guards kind of rush up to you. Hale! What do you carry and bring here to the, what is this thing? These papers. Oh, that's a spider. The evil monster that was killing everything. Papers? They look at it and they... You might want to send someone collect your dead too by the bottom. Quite a few. Bring them in. Some more of the guards begin to gather around,

and then Voluschen is pulled from his in his in-te- your office somewhere as he steps forth. He goes, all right, they tell me, oh, goodness me, that's a beastie. Tugs on the end of his chin mirror for a second. So this is it, this is the one. Indeed. In fact, it would turn invisible

when it wasn't trying to stick its fangs into all of our gang. Someone wake up, Clawin! Who the hell is Clawed? Clawin, and he was the one survivor. Cloin? Cloin. Cloin?

Kloin. Kloin. Kloin. Kloin. Kloin. With that accent, all those letters disappeared. It's true. There's also an egg sack that got taken care of.

Oh my gosh. Lots and lots and lots of things. And he goes to the guards like, go down there, double chat, make sure everything's good, go, and eventually watch as another guard is brought. And he kind of has a night shirt on, and he looks like he was kind of woken up. He's a little drowsy. He goes, what's going on? Hi.

Ha, ha. That didn't need to take it. He looks immediately scared, and he goes, Right, send him back to bed. Well, that's what we need it. Send him back to bed. You should let that guy go for, like, believe for a metal collapse,

that's rough, man. You look like just a person I would take advice from when it comes to administrating my people. Don't punch him, don't, no, no. He's got a fair point. Oh. I'll give him that. You don't look like an administrator.

I mean, that's actually almost a compliment. Do you know, I'll, yeah. It's fair. Very well. I'm impressed. I will go ahead and achieve your payments to the mighty seven. And nine, we lost two in the sewers.

I'm sorry to hear that, that's terrible. Extra. Extra, extra pay with softened the clown. Make a deception, Jack. I'm not. I'm not really okay. This is. Oh, no.

Oh, come on, come on. No, it's all due my is. Deception, deception, where the fuck is? Just deceive the DMs. Oh, it's 11. He goes, that's really too bad. Anyway, I'll be right back. We have armor too of some of your fallen people.

Will you reward us for that? Thank you. Yeah, you can buy it back for us or we can go pawn it, your choice. That is property of the crowd, thank you very much. Well, unfortunately, it's property in her bag. right now and it's real tough to get out of that bag. Well, don't tell them about the bag.

We're about to get a reward. Stop being a shit head right now. Sorry, fair. If you would be as kind to remember these fallen soldiers who protect you and the people of this city by delivering unto us the armor and weaponry that they had been lost with, I'll be happy to go forward with delivering your reward.

Yeah, who picked up all those items anyway. I have them. There's two sets of armor. Two of the guards collected. And two extra helmets. Side note, I did not come in this building. I'm hanging back and giving identify a whirl on what's in my bag.

That other armor. Okay. Outside. Oh. Do do, do, do. Travis will never see that card. All right. He comes back.

They bring a small chest. Give to Travis. Count it out, 700 gold pieces. And either it, please. Thank you very much. And I appreciate that. And since that, it adds up to you. So you seem able-bodied.

You've pulled through on something where a few have not been able to. We've been looking for more work. I'm sure we'll have things. Bit light at the moment, but where can we find you if we're looking for you? Oh, we're staying over at the The Littipa.

Although some of us were taken up, had a room at the... At the pillow drove, yes. We're saying a few other rooms, sir. Of course you do. Ligie Tapp. Good to know. All right. Now, shove off. What does that mean? Of course you do.

What? Of course she do. She has a room there. Of course she does. I do have a room there. I pull out my key. I have a room. Ah, fair play. No, shove off. I don't know why it mattered.

I'm glad you. 700 gold. As the Herald turns and Volition is there, there, some guards gather the armor and the weapons and stuff. Just the armor I didn't give back the swords. Okay, good to know. Noice. Noice.

Stick it to the man. Hell yeah. He goes, wait, I'd like to mate them. And Voluschen comes in the thumbs, goes, Oh, of, of course, law master. He steps back, and from around the side of the hall, from one of the doors on the left side of the building, a human woman comes through in her early 60s.

Once brown hair has turned mostly gray, and shoulder length it's kind of curled up a bit to kind of a soft bob on the sides. She's older, her face is weathered and has seen some time. She's wearing robes of golden white, but they seem to be not ceremonial, or they've worn enough to the point

where they look like they're worn for comfort. She kind of steps forward, and she has these warm brown eyes that kind of peek through this face. Sorry to bother all of you. We're just kidding. to me that you were successful and taken care of this beast in the sewers. I am lawmaster Arendtha, and I just wanted to extend my thanks.

It's not often that folks are willing to go to lengths and put their lives in the line for the honor of those fallen of the crown scar and those within the hall, the king. So I just wanted to say I appreciate that. Of course, we appreciate the law in this town, services you provide. You can lean on us for any further needs you might have. The Crown appreciates it. The people of the city appreciate it. I appreciate it. Thank you. She turns around and kind of shuffles back into the hallway.

Everyone goes about their business again and kind of begins shoving you off towards the door. She seems really nice. Yeah. Why did all those people want to rebel against her? She's still a part of the Crown's guard. She's still a part of the Crown's guard. She's still part of the system. She seems nice though. Yeah, they're nice individually sometimes, but they're still a part of a shitty hole.

A real shit. A shitty hole. Shades of gray in your world, are there? It's just shit or not shit. It's been a long day. A real shitty hole. So what's the kind of thing? lasting time on identify again?

Well, with, as a ritual, it's 11 minutes. Okay. So you guys would be exiting the building just as you finish that process. So you complete it, take a moment to think it over, and you hear them all exiting and talking to themselves as they're ribbing bow on the way out and you kind of quickly gather your things. Look, I don't mean a half-resting bitch face, okay?

Yeah, but it hasn't changed at all. I'm working on it. If anything, later in the day, it just gets worse. I'm just letting you know. It's not so much rest of as active, really. Yes, it's like working bitch face. That's cool. The bag's closed, you don't see shit.

Damn it. You're real quick. I heard you come in. You're loud. You're a lot. Are we? And let's leave in Marisha. Oh honey, I know.

Are we each taking a hundred gold? Yes, 100 gold. I was gonna wait till we got somewhere private to do it, but short. That's great. Everyone take a hundred gold. Yes, I'm like, look at that. Oh, look at that.

That's brilliant. Right there. We did it. And we never have to do another adventure again. Right? I don't know about you, I've got goals. Okay, see. Three next week.

Yep. That was it. Thank you for that. I'm working towards something. Towards something. What? Something. What?

Buy me a drink and I'll tell you. All right. What's the plan now to go to this place? Beth House? No, we're going to the pillow house, yeah? The pillow trow, the pillar place. Yeah, but we should probably get cleaned up because they're just going to stop us

the minute we get inside this. We are pretty food. Should we go and see Pumat Sol and see if he'll make us clean? Oh, we do ask some extra coin. Maybe he's got some fancier shit to buy. Well, also as long as we were in here, it was hard. I couldn't get in earlier, but we're here now. There is a stop. I wanted you to go with me.

We're not in the tri-spire. Where are we now? We're back at the King's Hall. Yeah, it's back in the interstead sprawl. That's a bummer. We just have to be clear. For someone who knows the exact time of night, you're shit with directions. That's up to you.

I thought that was pretty clear. When I'm like, memory is very different. You know, memory is different than being able to tell the time of day by the sun, right? Sun, right? Hmm? What? No, I remember everything that happens in the last month. I don't.

Caleb does. So I have a clipie. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's fine. But time of day. Time of day, I know. That's part of the feat. I know the hour of the day.

That's bananas. You should just be able to look at the sun and be like, oh. I am so cheating by following the rules in the book. I know. But right now it's probably close to the sun. to 8.30, 9 o'clock. So it's still an early evening issue later. Oh, cool.

Dinner and bad decisions and cleanliness would be great. Yeah, we have to get not stinky before we eat, okay. Agreed. Should we head back? Clean up. Okay. Sounds good. All right, you guys, easy enough, find your way back to the Lakey Tap, where you can utilize the washroom to get yourselves back to a personable state. On the stroll, Fjord. Yeah.

to talk to you about how that went back there. Can we walk alone for a minute? Sure, if you'd like. Let's drag back. Two things. One is I didn't bring it up even though, I think maybe Borogard knows, but I found something in there that I think is up your alley.

I found some armor beyond just Crowns Guard armor down there. It's, I mean, listen, my friend, you spit out salt water. You've got a sword that's covered in fucking anemones and shit. I'm not repeating that word. This armor is like the little mermaid armor. It's all for you. I found it, but I would like to trade it for you. Oh. Yeah, you have that glove, and I know I handed it over willingly just yesterday,

but I have a checkered past and an interesting history with... Flane, fire. There's no real. real reason, you'd be very good with that glove, but I feel like I would like to have that glove, and I would love for you to have this armor. I took a look at it while you guys were inside, and it would allow you to move freely in the ocean or in rivers or lake, underwater, and keep you safe in water. Wish I'd had that before. Yeah, I think a trade would be fine, but I'll trade you for a story of why your past is

so checkered with flame. You seem to have trusted me enough to tell me about it. I don't trust you yet. I don't trust any of these people yet, except for, I don't trust any of these people yet. That's too bad. Yeah, I've made mistakes in my life. I've harmed people, not in a long time. You know, I thought I was going to be something someday a long time ago. And now I Don't. Now ask me again in a couple of days. I will prepare an answer that is better than this for you. I promise. Sure. You know, we've all harmed people, but I hope that you will learn to trust me in time, and I appreciate you sharing that. Here, I am fairly certain that you will do far more damage with this than my shitty attempt did.

Of course. Thanks for the armor. What does it look like? It's a darker gray, but elements of where it's been pressed in with leather scrolling designed to look almost like waves curling on the outer parts of the different leather plates, have like a very, very faint, like a turquoise in light color on the inside that you only can see when it's directly lit. But it just looks like a very beautiful set of leather armor. There's no arms to it, other than the bracer plates right there, so there's no sleeve right there. There you go. It's got like an arm guard and a bracer there, shoulder piece, the kind of the torso portion of it, a couple of plates to go over that, and then some leg guards.

Yeah. All good things. Thank you for this. Thank you. Oh. Yeah, you're welcome. I don't want to interrupt your bromant. Oh, hi. You briments? Bromit. You want to be part of the brough moment? Nope.

Or a bow moment. I'm not here. I am not here. I thought she were. I thought you'd walked up. Are we going to bed? Or are we what? What are you guys doing?

Well, we're gonna get clean first. Good God, we're gonna clear out that. We'll say you just got clean for the expediency of the story. We don't have to roll play through you, bathing individually. But Matt. Unless you really want to. Always stop me. If you want to have a moment,

wait to the bathhouse to get clean? No. No, we're just splashed up a bit. Leaky tap, but splashed up like out. Just bleak up a neck a little bit. By the way, part of the reason I didn't wash up at the leaky tap is because in medieval times, they didn't have bats. I thought, no.

This isn't the Sheraton, they don't have a bat. Well, no, this isn't medieval times. In the fantasy world, it's a weird mixture of different time periods. And when I say they have a washroom, I mean, it's like a basin with water that is replaced every couple hours that kind of people community come up and wash. It's not nothing. cleanest water. It's probably been used by other people as well. And if you bathe fully in it,

it might be changed before the next two or three people use it. So it's not really an absolute. You have to be de rollo-leveled to have a bath in your house. To have it in your house. They have one washroom for the multitude of rooms the entire tavern have, and the water's changed every few hours, maybe. That's what I'm saying. But it's functional. That's why we should have bad houses. That's why people have bathhouses. You clean up. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. When Ford's taking a bath, I'm gonna go through his stuff and try to find his letter. His letter?

The letter for the Solstress Academy. Okay, go ahead and make a stealth check. Not good. 15. 15? Because you've taken your stuff in with you? Or would I still be in the room? I mean, I'd probably be.

Molly would probably still be in the room. Yeah. I got a stealth past Molly or get him out of the room. You do, make a exception check, Mom. I'm certainly not trying to hide it. Let's call that 20. You watch as not slowly creeps into the room, heading over towards Ford's Pack.

What you do? Liquor in here. What were you looking for? Nothing? Licker? We're looking for this, and I hold up a folded piece of paper. What will you give me for it? I'll give you a whole...

A whole gold piece. Oh, no, something. I don't want money, I want something. Give me something. Two gold pieces. Not gold pieces. What do you have? Let me look.

I have a vial of acid. That'll do. What is this? It's a blank piece of... Oh, fuck you! Maybe it's invisible ink. I came back the acid. Don't try and go through his stuff.

You're just gonna get caught. All right. What do we talk about grumpy people? You're right, he's not very grumpy. He's not grumpy. He should be. If I barfed up salt water every morning, I would be grumpy. Maybe if he spends more time around Bo to get grumpier.

One ass and ask him. You know what? I think he is grumpy, but he stands next to Beau so much that he looks happy. Grumpy ass wingman, Makes me better in embarrassment. You know, that's a fair point. I stand up. It's like that club friend, you're like,

don't go through my things, I know everything I have, and I walk out the door. Let's go. And when I walk by him, just going through your stuff, by the way. Which one? I leave. I've already walked away.

I shuffle in with like a towel. What the fuck, hey! Get out of here. Get out of here. Scoot! I shoot! Oh, shoot! Oh!

I am down suits having a drink. All right. All right. You finish your baths, you all convene down in the tavern. Yeah, all right. When you guys come down there and begin to reconvene, about two tables away you see sitting alone with a tankard a familiar dwarven figure to both Boe and

Forward. If you were a lot, Ulog, who you had met before. Who? Ulog. Ulog. Ulog. Ulog. Yes.

Dwarf. Not L'Its of Rekwital. Yes. Oh, good. Yeah, yeah, yeah. How do you do that? He just kind of watches you guys as you approach, and as soon as you all kind of gather at the table, he sets up and walks over. He was the one who was like super not cool with us being there, super kind of angry.

He seemed to be, yeah. Wife Elena. Yep. Into it, yep. He walks behind kind of where Ford and Bo are. He just goes, don't mean to bother you, but if I could have a moment of your time, let's talk. Of course. Yeah, man.

Excuse us. And he leads you guys back to where the cellar is. Don't talk. You guys head back, he kind of nods over towards your dragon-born bartender. He gives him a nod, walks past, leads you down to the same cellar. It's dark in there. There's no light, but he lights a hooded lantern as you enter, and it kind of gives this kind of low, mysterious atmosphere in the shadow as he spins around and goes,

I've been watching you a bit. You're a curious lot. More of you than came to the meeting. Five more. Did you, and please, be honest, I'm good at telling otherwise. Did you reveal any of our sentiments to your vermute to your companions

Witten saw you come back to town with the spider beast of your shoulders now that's um take you pretty good with a sword maybe with a bow experienced

what's your skill sets if I might ask beyond just being curious I'll come from all sorts of different backgrounds I happen to be very handy at sea On my way around the merchant area, Bo. I consider being curious a pretty high skill set,

but since you're asking beyond that, pretty good with this here, Bo. Pretty good fighter. Name Bo. It's a little redundant, to be totally honest. That's a little strange, not gonna lie. It's kind of obnoxious. Yeah. Sometimes it irritates me. Understood.

Yeah. Curse upon thee who made that decision for you. Can't pick them. So you can move quickly without a ruckus, you say. At times we can't be quite quiet. And your friends, do they share our sentiments? I would say it's safe to say that they don't have sentiments opposed to yours.

Indifference is a pretty strong sentiment. Listen, if you indeed have a heart for goodness in this world and you want to make a difference, We're moving on to something soon that I think we could use your aid on, you and your companions. And blast, if you need payments, I've got coin, I can muster.

And I see you do work for coin. And I have a few others of us who can chip in as well. But other than myself, most of the knights of Zadash, at least, are unskilled in the ways that we are. are willing to raise a voice, but not much of a fist or backing up a word with strength. I'm willing to make it worth your time.

You don't have to answer now, but tomorrow at midnight, me and a few others from the group, the decision makers were meeting back down here. If you're in, bring your friends. We can all talk. give you more information about what's going on, and you can say yes or no at your leisure. But I think we have a chance to really do something good

in this city, to change the part of the status quo, and to root out some of the unworthy at the top. So just think on it. I should let you know that the coin always helps, but we did see the posting outside the Kings Hall about uprisings against the Empire. So it seems the heat on your group might be quite intense. We're not against the empire. It protects us. There are good things about it. What we're

against are the people that abuse this system. And there are a handful in this town, and their time is up. Small cancers you're looking to remove. I would tell you that tomorrow night, the devil lies in the details, and that will depend. Then, your curiosity speak. Come by, we'll talk. And what makes you think that now is the right time for all of this? Well, we've been talking for a very long time.

And there's a shift coming that we want to ride the wave of. I'll let Dolan tell you the details tomorrow. Anyway. All right. And he snuffs the lent. the lantern. Good night. Night. God, stub my toe. I know, that was really good. Like, you didn't act like a total shit fuck.

Thanks. Thank you. I was trying to not show my emotions. Yeah, lock it in. That was great. Really nice. Yeah. Thank you. I'm trying to get better at it. Yeah. That's promising. What do you think? About that? I mean, shit, I can't really speak to it. I kind of have to figure out what they want to do tomorrow. I mean, in my experience, it doesn't matter if he thinks he's fucking with the Empire or not. The Empire is gonna look at it as fucking with him, and that never ends well. That's right, and if it's amateur out, we're gonna be shooting ourselves in the foot. Last thing we wanna do is take the fall for these assholes.

No joke, especially since we just got here. And he's talking like he wants us to be like the fist of his voice. What the fuck is that? Beer? Yeah. Okay. Yeah. All right, you guys reconvene with the rest of the group? So I walked in and the guy was like, you know, he had his arms above his head, he's trained to the bed, right?

And he didn't know where he left the key. I know, I don't even know. You put it there. Yeah. You think you'd still feel that. He paid for that service? Oh, people pay for all sorts of work. Sure. Wow.

Oh, hi guys. Hi. What's up? So, I wasn't quite sure what our next engagement. Engagement by B, but it seems like we might not have to wait that long. Do we get another job offer? Well, not through the city, per se. But remember that group that we joined the other day?

The cult is you really, G-Cult? No, that is not at all. No, no, we joined their meeting, right? We did not join them. We participated. We didn't participate. We had to. You had to show the group.

We were in the presence of an attended meeting of individuals. By boning you tell them. So they offered you money. More of a voyeuristic position of the protocol. So they offered you money to join in? That seems all right. Maybe it's just us. We just go, I'm fuck these over there.

What do they want? No, no, no, no. I mean, I guess it depends. You kept your eyes wide shut, is what you said. Come on, what's the finelio. Well done. Oh, that's terrible. Tomorrow evening there's going to be a meeting of that same group.

They would like to hire our services. Don't you think it's kind of stupid to say all of this like the right here? Why? Am I speaking real loud? Are we in the tavern? You guys are in the tavern on the table, but you're not keeping your voices somewhat discreet yet. Is anyone watching? Did you want me to write it down? No one seems to be paying immediate attention.

No. Okay. Do you want me to write it down? Yeah. Okay. I'll write it down for gesture, but for everybody else. Tomorrow, midnight, we're going to see what it is they want to do. And if the money's right and if it's not stupid.

If the money's right and it's not stupid, it's a good philosophy for this group. How can you be sure that he was telling the truth? You can't. Tell us a lot of anything. Yeah. How do you know that he isn't setting you up to be turned into the crowns guard? Exactly what she said.

Well, since it's in the same place, it's in the same cellar. I figure you guys can keep watch above while we're getting info down below. We don't all need to be down in the same place. Oh, and we can have my cat tomorrow to link the two groups. Where's your cat?

Oh, boy, he got kicked to shit today. Oh. Sorry, I didn't mean to. Like kick to death? Well, you know, it's hazy, because he's never really kicked to death. He's just kicked off of this, off of the material plane. He got kicked into another dimension. He does, I'm not going to lie, it does hurt when he's gone, but I always know he can come back if I have the coin.

Was it one kick? Just like one... Oh, God. No, it's not funny. It's a little funny. Frumkin has a good sense of humor about it. That's good. Kicked into a fucking, you don't you mention. But who kicks a fucking cat?

Exactly, who kicks a fucking cat? Exactly is my point. You can do a lot of things and have a very bad day, but who kicks a cat? It's an asshole. I mean, never going to... Oh, he had such a face, I will never forget this face. We'll beat his ass later.

Maybe. We'll beat his ass later. You kick a cat, you're going to end badly. That's just how it works. You might as well be at home picking the wings off flies. You kick a cat. What is wrong with you? Wait a minute, is it bad to pick wings off flies?

It's actually hard to do. They're very small and hard to catch. Not if they're already dead, then you can pick the wings off super dupe. Oh, sure. They're already dead. I mean, just go for them. You know what we used to do is kids? We used to take fireflies and crush them.

They make glow jewelry. When they would light up and you crush them right as they light up and then you can make glowy war paints. What's a firefly? It's a thing that happens on the East Coast. And in the South. Yeah. It's a southern thing. And in New Jersey.

Yeah. Oh, wow. This is the thing that really happens, I was not. But on second thought, who am I to judge? It's fine. You know, Framkin will be back tomorrow morning because I'm going to stay up late and do what I have to do. But aren't we going to have a rager tonight at this place in the fancy part of town? Oh yeah, we can go back to the Pilotrov and all hang out and sleep in the same room if you want.

So we just got clean and we're going to get back in the sewers to get to the trice bar. Is this room that you rented gigantic? No, it's kind of little, actually. You guys, it's really little, actually. But you said. But you paid for it. You paid for it? You know, you don't want to let it go to waste, and there's probably a very nice, you know, sitting room or or something underneath this place. It's a shame to it. It's nice enough. They might let us in. If not, let's all just go, you know, yeah.

What? What? Excuse me? I'm kidding. Oh, okay. Sure, we walk back over to do. the guards and I showed the key, can we get it? Clope is on. For the sake of brevity, since it's getting late. I want to get this to a good ending point tonight. They will let you in, but nobody else.

Oh. But she paid for the whole night with all of us. It's a posse. I try and look them right in the eye when I say that. Don't you know how it works? And they take your key, but they look towards the rather rough-looking a large, scary, barbarian woman. They look towards the very shifty-looking

multicolored teeth thing. They look past the, while he's wearing a cloak, foot knobbing. Still kind of rough, grimy-looking wizard. I just go out of my face is not. And they begin to fixate very directly on the tiny green but white masked skin hafling creature thing in earmuffs

that's squinting very hard, and they begin to really pry in that direction before you started thinking this is not going to go well if they keep going. All right, all right, all right. Well maybe I'm just a DJ. Hold you down, you know? Like if you want to go enjoy. Oh, I don't really want to just stay in there alone. How don't we just dive bar tonight then? It alone is sucking. Roll for random bar.

Yeah. Yeah. When there's you know one dive. The evening mip. Let's, no work, let's just go make an ass of ourselves of the evening. Yeah, we don't have to. Okay, no questions.

We can get kicked out. Sure, scout it out. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Stout it out. I'm a very, I think it's a great, I, bar, words. All right. Nothing but bar awards.

All righty, so, we pull this up real fast. Easy enough to find, you head to another section of the interstead sprawl. No, you've not been. Oh shit, you've not been. And when you come to, you come to, What is a small, dark wood, rough and tumble dive bar with two very dangerous-looking guards at the outside? You see these thicker-chimmon guys, one who is completely bald, pale skin,

big square chinless. It's been broken in multiple places, his arms just crossed. The other one looks to be a spindly guy. It's just sitting there, kind of daggers sheath on both sides, and they both kind of watch you as you enter, and they both just stare. They're like bouncers, like rough bouncers at that bar. Yeah. Okay, okay. Which is interesting, because you expect then to go through that to be a really rowdy place. But it's very quiet. You walk inside and aside from the central kind of candlelit chandelier that is almost obtrusively laid from a low ceiling with a number of small, I would say, boots that are built out of wood as well. It has a class classic kind of old England pub feel,

but everything smells of dried beers and ale and rotted wood. You only see two other patrons in there that are at separate booths drinking alone, and then across the way you see this very, very old dwarf with half of his beard burned away and kind of this perpetual grimace. And he's sitting there just kind of looking out as you enter, he kind of perks up. Hi. Can I help you?

He's the bartender? Yeah. Just take a round of your house ale, if you don't mind. We'll start a tab. We're looking to tie one on tonight. We're celebrating. I can ask what you're celebrating? Killed a fucking giant invisible spider, friend. That's a pretty good reason to celebrate. Yeah.

Drinks is coming right up. He goes and gets you guys a number of drinks. The basest, most kind of bitter ale you've had, but it's functional. Appreciate that. Can I ask your name? They call me Clive. Clive.

Clive Bins. And this is my bar. Nice to meet you, Clive Bucl. Pleasure is well. Notice some tough looking types out front. Never be too careful. Dangerous times. Riots breaking out in cities and the empire. Folks coming through, you've got to keep prepared. Don't want to get taken advantage of. You've been hit by any riots?

No, but that's why. I keep him out front. His eyes are just locked in. I was going to say, why are you? No, no. I'm just staring out of my eyes. Do you look like me, Ned Ford? You can't tell this. No, it's just kind of creepy. He's just locked in. Hey, screen your favorite color or something.

Sorry, just don't get a lot of your types in here. Yeah. What is his type? Orchish blood. Pretty. Pretty. See Ford, you're just so handsome. Thank you, Jester. Clive, we, uh, we're not looking for any trouble.

Then don't start in there. Finish your drinks. Enjoy. He slips him out. Thanks, man. This place sucks. This is maybe not the best place to celebrate. That guy is socially awkward.

Is there any music or is it just like low murmur conversation? No conversation. There's two people in here. The two people at separate booze that are just drinking by themselves and they're all looking at you. Yeah, it was to say, what do they look like? Oh, we walked into the fucking Russian moth bar. We walked into the mall bar. We walked into the mob bar.

This is a fight club. No. Wait, nope. No. Do you have a menu? You don't. You don't. Do you have any beers on 10?

No, just the two? Okay. Okay. Interesting. Feels like this is a punch. There's two other guys. One of them is younger, plump human male has kind of a tuft of a red and gray goatee

kind of at the end of his chin. No hair on top of his head. The other guy, he looks to be human as well. He's older in his 40s. He glances over at you. He's just kind of just clutching a tankard, and you can see he has a very familiar tattoo around his neck in the band.

The tattoo's familiar or he's familiar? No, the tattoo, it's not him, but it's the tattoo. The stake situation. Show me your tats. Yeah, it's a similar, you don't know if it's directly the same, but it's a similar tattoo to Thed who you met earlier. Maybe you should ask him about. Just because someone has tattoos,

I mean they know everybody's ever had a tattoo on it. These are very different tattoos. The floor look. Barren, wood, any rugs, cover me. How big is this place? This place is maybe 20 feet by 30 feet. It's very small. The floor appears to be wood boards.

There are a couple doors that leave into a kitchen or a storage area. It's like a tiny fucking dive. Like, unless we're gonna do this, we should get This is, should we just do this then? Do a little recon. Yeah. Maybe we finish her drink and move on for now. Yeah.

Just go back to the leaky tap and then, you know. We learned something to them. We've slept after our snake, our spider bite. Yeah. Okay. So you get to finish your terrible ale and you leave. This is awful. I don't want it. I pound it for.

Okay. Thanks for coming by. Have a good night. Thank you, Clive Binns. You guys leave and the two guards watch you leave. Nobody wants to stay? Do you want to stay? Yasha, I'll stay with you. I'd like it here.

I'm thirsty and out of water and I keep going to drink nothing with me. Do it so much. Can someone fly us in someone watching for the DM? It's fine. It's fine. Because I use your type of people. I do like these people. Let's play for another six hours.

No, yeah. Six more hours? Six more hours. Let's make it so they have to break this in like five YouTube. So do you guys leave? Yes, we leave. Okay. You get everything's up. You leave out into the street to go on to the next leg of your evening adventure,

and that's real close tonight's episode. We'll pick up, because it is 11 o'clock. We'll pick up next week as you guys are leaving the evening nip to whatever other business you want to go towards. We learned so much today, guys. I feel like we all grew with people. Oh, I don't want to stop. I don't want to stop.

I know. Just in time. Keep going. I feel like we're on a roll. Can we just do it just pass it home? Let's get some, keep going. Shoes and the mosa. Yeah, get a locks and bagels.

Some green. It would be wonderful and I feel like there would be a lot of very angry, disappointed people. Charlie the dog. Charlie, the farting in the corner. I know. He's old and stinky. She's so stinky.

She's so stinky. No. Yep in. Yeah, dude. It was like the roughest of old biker bars. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. All right, guys, thank you so much.

Always a pleasure. Pick this up next week. I wish it was sooner. You guys, thank you so much. Have a wonderful night. We'll see you on the internet. If anyone wants to see me, come see me sing a cappella at the University of Virginia

on Saturday night. What? What? What? What? Wait, you're not a surprise. Sam has deep a cappella roots. You all know that.

I'll be performing in a college a cappella concert on Saturday night. You are nice. You are so cool. In Virginia? In Charlottesville. What's the address though? I don't know the address.

University of Virginia, yeah, you're fine. And on that note, folks, have a wonderful night, and is it Thursday yet? Good night. Good night. Welcome to Mick Unplugged, the number one podcast for self-improvement, and modern leadership.

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