Critical Role & Sagas of Sundry - Exit-stential Crisis | Sagas of Sundry: Goblin Mode | Episode 2

Episode Date: September 16, 2024

Bizzee, Tippy, and Fibs are headed for the exit of the dungeon, but danger lies in their way…danger and an obnoxious ex-coworker: Mimsy, the mimic chest. Will they close the lid on the only home they've ever known? Or will they fall into line with Fiends United? Find out if these three former lemmings make it out alive on this episode of Sagas of Sundry: Goblin Mode. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Insurance isn't one-size-fits-all, and shopping for it shouldn't feel like squeezing into something that just doesn't fit. That's why drivers have enjoyed progressives' name-your-price tool for years. With the name-your-price tool, you tell them what you want to pay, and they show you options that fit your budget. Enough hunting for discounts, trying to calculate rates, and tinkering with coverages. Maybe you're picking out your very first policy. Or maybe you're just looking for something that works better for you and your family. Either way, they make it simple to see your options. No guesswork, no surprises.

Ready to see how easy and fun shopping for car insurance can be? Visit progressive.com and give the name your price tool a try. Take the stress out of shopping and find coverage that fits your life on your terms. Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and Affiliates. Price and coverage match limited by state law. Two Good and Co-Copy creamers are made with farm fresh cream, real milk, and contain three grams of sugar per serving. That's 40% less than the 5 grams per serving in leading traditional coffee creamers for a rich, delicious experience. Whether you enjoy your coffee hot,

cold, bold, or frothy, two good coffee creamers make every sip a good one. Two good coffee creamers, real goodness in every sip. Find them at your local Kroger in the creamer aisle. Welcome back to Goblin mode. This is a TTRPG about minions taking their own agency, lives, and adventures into their own hands. And last, when we left off players, you had escaped your pit, found the rest of your dungeon that has been your home for five years

in complete disarray. And as you were processing grief, the Fiends United Union came in, claiming the dungeon for themselves. In a fit of iron umbrage, you attempted to cow tip a mimic. Attempted. And run away in the direction that actually,

These two, the Grell and the mimic wanted you to go in the first place. So as we part the veil of reality. Ooh. Too much power. That felt really good. We are no longer on this realm surrounded by art reminiscent of our little game. No, no, no. We are in the bowels and depths of Eun-zug's lair,

a monstrous, dark, overlord necromancer, surrounded by onyx and black stone, tunnels lit by only ever-bright crystals, and hate. And... My favorite decoration. Renewable energy. You are running.

You're running towards the only exit you know possible, convinced that you have to get out of here. If you do remember the Grell, Deb, and the mimic, Mimsy, he did leave for the Fiends United, but they had wanted you to go to the exit slash entrance of Unzug's Lair and fix the door, and you're on your way. You're running fairly quickly because your prank on Mimsy didn't quite go off the way you wanted to,

but you can hear them behind you moving at a slower pace. So for the most part of your jaunt, you find yourselves alone. Is there anything you like to do as you approach the exit? Yes, I would like to peel off and just grab my like little rucksack. Okay, perfect, yeah. So I'll say that that would be kind of on the fifth floor where you have your resting spots on the floor.

There's just kind of a room where you just have your stuff. You have a lot of stuff. I have a lot of stuff. I would say you can have as much stuff as you can carry, but I don't know how useful any of it. To Tippy, it's all very useful. It's all very useful. As you all stop off, you can gather

your things, maybe your prized rock or whatever. You can trade off some stuff if you... I mean, I'm using stuff very generically, but yeah, you know what I mean. Like, you can take a little bit of time. Okay. Is there anything in particular that you were after? Yeah, because I was wearing, uh, previously on Goblin Mode.

I was wearing my work clothes. That's right, yes. Really kind of ratty, tabored, and like a dented iron helm that I traded for a top hat belonging to a problematic gelatinous cube. It's just not me. It's not the real Phibs. So, Phibs, you know, as he showed last time,

dabbles in wizardry. So Phibbs is going to run into the room and sort of take off his work clothes and put on what he feels most comfortable in. And that is this kind of stained, greasy purple robe. It's got some like a little faded silvery stars. There's like some gold thread on the back with what was once like an arcane sigil, but it's hard to tell

because there's just kind of like some blood smeared on it because it's something he picked up from a less fortunate gallantling that invaded the dungeon. He also has always read that Wizards of Yore had really long, flowing locks of like white hair.

So he takes out this like dented, busted purple conical Wizards hat, like a classic wizard's hat. But affixed to the back of it and a mullet-esque fashion is this flowing mane of platinum blonde hair that he removed from a paladin who met his untimely end.

And so now if it puts it on, the hair's a little heavy, so it kind of tilts back a little bit. So it's like a lot of like skeletal paint at the front and flowing blonde locks the back. And then he like looks at his iron sword and like, you know, it's been his trusty workman's tool. He puts it down and then he has this oak quarter staff that has a couple of bite marks out of it.

There's two pieces of red ribbon at the top, and now he feels like, okay, I finally the wizard I was meant to be. He double checks that he has his spell book and his rib cage and then he is good to go. He's got his little magical pack, and he puts on this bandolier across his shoulder and there's all these little pouches on it with some spell components and some little snacks

for Loof. Some spider treats. Yes, oh amazing. We had to go back for your quick weave. That's great. That's amazing. Can't leave that behind. You cannot.

Oh my God. I don't feel like myself without it. It's the scalp of a humanoid. Oh yeah. Yeah, full on. Oh, the inside, don't look at the inside. It's not cleaned very well. It's quite scalpy still.

Yeah. But it just helps to fix it. Yeah. And just as you're there, I mean, your quarters kind of double as a torture chamber as well for other humanoid. So, yeah, the adventures did nothing to save these people. So there is just some huge. humanoid still screaming. I'd say about three still,

maybe a dwarf, a halfling. Is anybody still torturing them, or is it just? Yeah, I don't think, no, there's no one, there's no one still torturing them. Anyone who would torture them. It's pretty messed up that they killed the tortures but left them on the rack. Yeah.

Yeah, it is, yeah. Yeah, I'm just gonna look around to see if anybody has, like, leather, like, straps, scraps that I could like take because I want to make something out of that later. You'd be able to just take some cuffs, some leather cuffs. Yeah, I walk up to one of the people being tortured.

Okay. And I go, sorry. I'm sorry. And I just take the cuffs off of their body. So are you freeing them? No. I'm just taking the cuffs. Oh, okay.

Great. Well, I don't know how that works. Does me taking the cuff free them? No, no, they can be bound with iron, and then they can maybe have some leather gauntlets. Yes. That's what I want. You want the gomlets?

Yeah. Okay. Okay. One final indignity. Yeah, no, I mean, we're all evil here, so yeah, you're able to do that. You also can find some leather, some leather ties. Yeah. Yeah, I'd say you find about like 10 leather ties real quick.

I mean, if that's all you're doing. Because I want to make a makeshift, like what would resemble like a goblin gun holster, and strap it to my leg and put some rocks in it. That's what I want to do. Mm-hmm. It's just what I want to do. I think that's great. So would you be making the gun holster right now?

I mean, on your way? Yeah, on my way, like in the just frantically. Well, you are an artificer. I wonder what you can convince me that you can do. I have magical tinkering. Okay. I can imbue tiny non-magical objects with magical property of my choice.

So you could like whisper some leather into a correct shape? Yeah, I'm just trying to weave this leather frantically as my companions are like Geez. Putting their scalps on. Yeah. You know that you'll need a few short rests to get it actually into shape,

but you could imagine, I think you could talk to the leather and make it, convince it to take a shape. Then you would need to add on some other components and then have the leather be hardened and, like, talk the wetness out of the leather too. Sure, I'm going to talk the wetness out of the leather. Okay, so we'll give you,

you can do this out in three short rests, and this could be considered a short rest. Perfect. Perfect. That's what I want to do. Okay, great. Can't wait for this to bite all of us in the ass. Busy goes up to one of the people being tortured.

She's already kind of grabbed most of the stuff that she needs. I just goes up with her clipboard and it's like, hey, hi, I am so sorry to bother you. So, is there anything? Greetings, adventurer. Spring has sprung here in Los Angeles, and that means that means. And that means it's a brief period where it's only 75 degrees instead of 95 degrees. I'll take it. And that means I've been outside a lot more. Walking around, occasionally galloping after a toddler hopped up on juice boxes, traveling a bit. You know the vibe.

And after doing some spring cleaning, my wardrobe, I gotta say, looking a little bit sad. I want clothes that can keep up with me and my son, but updating my wardrobe every spring sounds pretty expensive. So that's why I wound up signing up for Fabletics as a view. It let me overhaul my springtime outfits without obliterating my bank account. New VIPs unlock major savings on that first purchase, so trying new fits feels way more doable. When I signed up as a new VIP with Fabletics, I got 70 to 80% off everything. It made it easy to grab a few new pieces without overthinking it. And the quality really surprised me. Everything feels premium and soft and breathable, but you're not paying those premium prices. What I like most though is how versatile everything is.

You've got stuff you can work out in, but also wear out. There's matching sets, lightweight hoodies, joggers, teas, you name it. The kind of stuff you can throw on in the morning and not worry about later. When I'm at home, my favorite thing to pull on is the oversized hoodie. It's so comfy I could just live in it 24-7. It's perfect for walking my dog on like a chilly night. But what I'm out and about, I've really been loving the ribbed Johnny Collar polo. It makes me look like I should be taking a high-powered meeting by the pool at the White Lotus,

but hopefully with less murder involved. I don't know. It's insanely comfortable. I highly recommend it. So shop now at fabletics.com slash critical role to get 70 to 80% off everything when you sign up as a new VIP. Take a quick style quiz and be sure to select critical role when prompted to unlock your 70 to 80% off. This is a limited time offer, so don't wait. Again, that's fabletics.com slash critical role for 70 to 80% off everything as a new VIP. And now, on to the show. Greetings adventurers.

Lately, I've been getting a bit more intentional about what I wear from day to day because instead of just falling out of whatever laundry baskets nearby, I've been leaning into pieces that feel easy and comfortable, but still put together because it just makes getting dressed simpler when I have a plan.

Quince has been my go-to to help with that because the fabrics feel elevated, the fits are clean, and everything just works without me needing to overthink it. And Quintz has all the wardrobe staples you need for spring think 100% European linen shorts and shirts from just $34.

They're lightweight, they're breathable, they're comfortable, your legs, and torso will thank you, and you will still look put together. And clean, 100% Pima Cotton Tees with a softness, well, you got to feel that to believe it, believe you me. Their pants also hit that same balance. They're relaxed, they're comfortable, but still polished enough to wear basically anywhere. And everything's priced between 50 and 80% less than what you'd find at similar brands. Quince works directly with ethical factories and cuts out the middlemen so you're getting premium materials without the markup. And since spring is here in Los Angeles, a brief period where it's 75 degrees instead of 95 degrees,

I spruced up my wardrobe with a pair of the comfort stretch traveler five pocket pants and the heritage washed denim shirt. Not only do they feel great, but I unequivocally look good as hell while wearing them. That's just science. So refresh your every day with luxury you'll only. actually use. Head to quince.com slash critical roll for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. Now available in Canada too. That's Q-U-I-N-C-E.com slash critical roll for free shipping and 365-day returns.

Quince.com slash critical role. Like, that you would say that you would, that you enjoyed about your experience in your time here or that you might change. To mom, take care of an or more. Okay, great. So when you say that this is one of your best dungeon experiences, or do you think that maybe there were some ways we could have improved? I'll give you 50 gold if you return me to family.

50 gold? Where's your family? The Wilds. The Wilds? Myerfin. Myerfin. Y'all, are we going to Myrfin? Do you know anybody?

I've never heard of myriffin. I've never heard of Meierfin. What is Breka from those? Yeah, I don't know. You know, I just don't think we're gonna be hitting out that way. I mean, like, how are you even gonna move them around? We also use a proprietary currency called Dungeon Dollars down here, so I don't really understand what gold trends.

but a gold trends. I've got a high yield savings account for like a while. A wrath IRA. Totally. Yeah. Five stars. Five stars?

Five stars? Five star review. Five stars. That's very impressive. Good job, Busy. Do you want to, would you just mind signing that? Busy like puts the pen like in their mouth? In the mouth.

Okay, yeah. This poor halfling is like, yeah, dangling by literal shoulder tendons of this. Yeah, just like right there. And she just nods, she just nods her head, so it makes a marking. Oh, perfect. Save me. You know, unfortunately, we've just went out of time.

Since the dungeon itself is closing, we're actually off shift. So I don't think rules would allow me to do any. I think union regulations or something like that. So we're not union, so somebody from the union's going to have to come down here and save you. No, kill me. I'm really sorry about that. Oh, no, it's silica. Collective bargaining is positive, but we...

It's a good thing, yeah. It's a good thing. Union Dungeons are the worst. Wow. Wow. No wonder you have 50 gold, okay. Yeah. Wow.

Sorry, I didn't know we're talking to a scab over here. I know. We don't scab, sorry. Don't scab. Don't scab. No, we've got to call so, because there's got to be like someone who's an official, like, untaker downer, and I can't take so much jobs.

I'm not going to our future for getting into the union. Yeah. So I'm really sorry. Sorry about that. Hey, best of luck to you and thank you so much for the feedback. Busy looks at the other two companions that are there. Does anybody want to add anything to the form before we go? No, they don't. Cut off shift.

Yeah, I guess the dwarf is still screaming and the human is passed out. Okay, well, you know, thank you so much. It has been just an honor and a privilege to work with y'all. But we've got to, we've got to go, I guess. Okay, yeah. Someone from the union will come down and, you know, It'll come down and... Yeah, and you're able to remove yourself

with the pleas and the screams of a few humanoids in the torture dungeon. Good luck! We'll definitely see them again. We'll be back, I guess. Maybe. Okay, cool. So is there anything else you wanted to do

in the dungeon employees' quarters or... What I want to do is, do we still hear, like, Mimsy and Gab behind us? No, they're not behind you. I would say that... Like, you have taken a bit of time here. I guess Mimsy would have known where you were going, or unless you were being really stealthy,

but I don't think he would have had a problem with that. So they would have gone on to the exit. You know what? Just to cover my tracks, I don't trust that box. I take out the non-magical spike that we removed from the trap that we were stuck in at the beginning of last session. And is this dungeon like a spiral,

would you say it's like a kind of like a spiral staircase going up? Yeah, I would say that there's like, on each floor. there's kind of two areas that can ascend and descend and at least one of them is its own spiral staircase. Like there's one kind of spire that goes all the way down. I'm going to roll it down the spire so it just starts rolling down towards the bottom in case they happen to be walking up this way. Oh, okay, great. Yeah, okay, so yeah, you rolled down the spike.

It was a little too heavy for me. Okay, perfect. And you're listening and you hear it, tink, tink, tink, tink, tink, tink, tink, all the way down the steps and then clonk as it maybe hits. And a bit of a v-v-h-as it hits Eun-Zug's door and obviously like trips a trap. Oh, man. I shouldn't have stood here to listen to it the whole time. But let's go, let's go friends. Yeah, great. So you're one steel spike unburdened.

Anything else that y'all, for real, got? I just want to fill my holster with rocks. Plenty of rocks around. Plenty of mundane rocks around. Okay, perfect. So you know where to go now. You know where the exit is. I would say that none of you have really made it a priority to escape.

You've been pretty happy here. You've seen the exit. You've seen the light of day or the overcast of day in the desolation outside. But for the most part, this is a bit of a new journey for you. And it's about a hundred foot tunnel that slowly climbs on an ascent to the entrance to Eunzug's lair, where there's a giant cavernous mouth that opens out to the desolation at the base of the blackstone mountain, which is Eun-ZUgs' lair. So as you make your way there,

you see that Deb and Mimsy are already there. Deb has two tentacles kind of cross, like with her arms across her chest, and Mimsie's also looking quite smug. As you have approached as well, there are also cobales and goblins and other skeletons, ghosts that have, like, moved around you and just been like off to do their due diligence as well,

part of the Fiends United. There's a few things going on. The gate that opens and closes, that is massive, it's like 20 feet high. It's like going haywire. It's going up and down and up and down and up and down. In front of it are so many corpses of minions. Some of them you know from Muzuzuzler.

Some of them are pals or at least coworkers. But some of them you don't. Among these piles of bodies, there are two weird sprouting balloon type things coming off of the corpses. It looks like this could grow flesh and eyes, but for the most part, it just feels like it's filling up with something. And then the other thing you see are these square-headed

machine-like kind of robot creatures, also malfunctioning, crawling up and down the bodies near the gate and the hydraulics of the gate, which, as you know, Tippy, there are two big glass tubes on either side of the cavern entrance. And there are three beings inside that really just look like white puffs of smoke, but every once in a while you see two eyes and a nose

as they flit around in there. And they're going hog wild. And it does seem like on each level, they're banging up against the tubes as if they wanna come out. And you can tell that it's like, oh, the hydraulic system is messed up because of the elementals that you've got

doing the steam and water work are not being controlled anymore. And that makes sense because your buddy, Mag Mag the Ogre is one of the dead. Yeah, he's dead upon one of these piles as well. No, it's mag, mag. Here's the door guy. Among other things.

But you know that he did come. Among other things. Okay, yeah. That's what you see, but as you approach and Deb goes, yeah, so we lost a lot of our people getting in here. And you might perish on the way out. And yet, you might perish staying here too. I don't understand, are you threatening us

for leaving as you told us to do? No, we want you to leave. Just look out. Did you guys not like plan for, you know, getting whooped on the way here? No, we were told the dungeon was completely cleared, which it was, it just seems like some of the machinery still wants to attack us. Oh, those guys over there? Yeah, yeah, they are feral robots. Ferrell.

Well, you know, robots aren't feral. They're, you know, somebody built them and gave them life and so, anything, can be fixed. Yeah, and you might know how to fix them, or at least tame them. Roll a straight-up intelligence check. OK. Let's go.

It's going to be a six. A six. OK. The only thing you know is that Mag Mag sure had it under control. Yeah, Mag Mag was the door guy, the robot guy, among other things. So here's the thing.

You want us to leave. The door's broken. You guys got yourself trapped in here. I just want to understand, like, if we leave, what do we get at? Are we going to, like, it feels like nothing but danger out there. If it were an hour ago, I would have encouraged you to join the union, but it is too late now. It's too late. Well, you still can join the union, just not, again, you would need your signature from your employer or the circlet of interruption return to its resting spot.

And the circlet of interruption is out there somewhere. We don't know. Why would we know? We just, we're going to make the dungeon as legitimate as possible without it. But if you bring it to us, then yeah, you can join the union as a gift because you've brought us a gift. All right. Well, I've never left the dungeon before. You know, guys, I really recommend it sometimes to just get yourself out of here, you know, and just take yourselves and really see what you're made of. Time... What? Why do you look so happy?

I see what I'm made of. Oh yeah, I mean, I just recommend that for anybody. And on the way, if you fix the door, that would just be great for us too. Mimsy, I think you need to fix what's wrong inside of yourself before you go around dispensing advice, like that gigantic tongue inside of your oversized head. Here, here. Listen, this is how I was made, and I don't think there's anything wrong with me that needs to be fixed. I think you should mimic some compassion,

and stop talking to us about leaving the dungeon that we're being forced out of. Okay, I mean, I can stop talking. That would be what. How about this? I'll fix the door if you say sorry. Yeah, okay, I'm sorry. No.

No, you gotta mean it. And also, we would like you to give a small but proper eulogy for all of our friends that you've slain. Okay, so I didn't slay all of your friends at all. The Fiends United didn't do any of the slaying. But I still blame you? Yeah, I blame you. Because you're here and they're not.

You know how we slaughter gallantlings in Eun-zug's name? It's not like he has to bother himself with the actual physical day-to-day slaying. It's like that, but you're guilty by association. I think you're just guilty because I think you're a bad person. Mimic, box, chest. Here, the thing is, when you're in the union, you can file an official complaint about another union member,

but until then, we don't actually register your opinions as valid. Okay, so- And Mimsie goes, Okay, but in honor of your first request, I'm so sorry that things didn't go your way today. Wow. Yeah.

Okay. That's as good as we're gonna get. That's about it, huh? Wow. Apology rejected, but duly noted. On the corpse pile, are they like, do they still have all their stuff? Yeah, they do.

So as you're talking to them, you've got some other fiends of the union just coming up, and you do see a monster you've never seen before. As you're kind of looking around and clocking Mimsy and just kind of looking at each other in the situation, this monster is vast. It's like 15 feet by 15 feet, but it's a part of the wall,

and it's hands and mouths that push out from the wall. It makes the stone wall look elastic. And it's just like many mouths and many hands pressing out in this 15 foot cute. I just love architecture. He says, oh, hey Deb, I have done all of the searching of the dungeon and we're looking good here. Just got that door thing.

Are these the ones we're gonna fix the door? Yeah, I guess. We'll take a look. We'll take a look at the door. Also, there's some people in the dungeon you might want to take care of. It might be something. I don't know if you saw it. Yes, we did.

The people who were being tortured. Yeah. We'll have to complete that. Okay. We'll have to complete that. Kind of sloppy work, yeah. Kind of just leave them there. Right.

I mean, but to be fair, they did get annihilated by a group of, it seems extremely talented gallantlings. Just trying to understand what the union has to offer, really. But anyways. Yeah, we'll put someone on that right now. It's actually a really good directive. You have the aura of at least lower middle management. Oh, well, thank you, because I was, but.

Oh, were you? Deb, you know we could use something? Stop it, we're not, they're not union. You're gonna have to kill them if they stay here. Oh, well, oh. Yeah, you don't have to kill us because we're gonna fix the door. Right guys?

Yep, we're gonna fix the door. Well, come here, come here. Get over here. Okay. Which mouth am I addressing? You're addressing a southwest mouth. That, okay. And yeah, you gotta get a good vibe from this wall monster.

And he says, if you're really gonna do this, I got some spells, I could just, I could be so upon you. Oh. And if Deb doesn't see, there's no reason she should see. She underestimates the hell out of me. You see that, you see that skeleton over there with the weird scalp wig thing going on? Oh, despicable, I love it. Yeah, that's your buddy Phibb's.

He's the one with the spells if you want to, you know, impart some knowledge. No, no, I could cast the spells. Look, here's what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna give y'all, whooosh. And he casts aid on you. It increases your maximum and current hit points by five. Okay, I'm sick.

I'm terrible did you. Need that. But just to keep that between you and me. I just know going into that whole door corpse situation, it's gonna be a bit gnarly. and I'm not going anywhere near it, and you can tell Deb and the old mimsy butt isn't going anywhere near it.

You know, you're talking a lot of sense. Really appreciate you. Oh, thank you. They're like the most sensible monster of ghoul thingy out here. Oh my god. Well, wow, thank you. Maybe tell Deb that. She's running this operation, but I have aspirations for myself.

And I just, as again, I think I've been underestimated. I mean, how many times have you seen hands and mouths pry outside of walls before. Just once. No? Literally right now. I know. I know. I know. I'm a commodity. Anyway, I appreciate it. I will have to attack you if you do stay here, but I think, I really kind of hope you

come back. That's tough but fair. Yeah. Yeah. It's time to bring on the blooms at the Home Depot with Spring Garden Deals. Find savings on hanging baskets and flowers to brighten your backyard or any space that needs instant color. Then get everything you need to plant and protect them with low prices guaranteed on soil and mulch. Dig into spring garden deals for four days at the Home Depot. Now through May 10th.

Exclusion supply, see Home Depot.com slash price match for details. You said this place was steps from the water. We just haven't found the steps yet. How much did we save? Enough. Enough to get lost. Or you could book a stay with Hilton. Welcome to your oceanfront room. Just steps from the water. The Hilton sale is on now. Book on Hilton.com or the Hilton app and save up to 20% to get the stay you expected.

When you want savings, not surprises. It matters where you stay. Hilton, for the stay. Maybe you'll join the Fiends United and we'll make something of this dang union. Yeah, we'll see. I like the cut of your jib. Many jibs here.

Okay, well, don't let her see. Wow, what a friendly wall monster. Yeah, I like that. Yeah, should have come up here more often. One of the hands waves at you. Busy, like, just gives a high-five. Oh, hi-five. Hey.

Oh. I wanted search the corpse pile for, is it hag-hag? What was it then? Mag-Mag-Mag. Mag-mag. Mag-mag, sorry? Hag-hag's sister.

Mag-mag. I want to search Mag-Mag's body for any sort of, like, information, or if he has a manual, both of the door. Okay, an investigation check, and if any of you are, If any of you want to help him, I'll allow that too.

It does seem like this does have a source. This is a dirty 20, so 15 plus. A dirty 20, and you have advantage. So if you want to roll again and see if you get a natural 20, I would allow it. I didn't. That's a 3, so yeah, I'll take the 15. A dirty 20, great.

Okay, so everyone's kind of peering in. You see the problem. You see that these robots are malfunctioning, which somehow is related to causing the elementals in the tubes to malfunction, and you know that Magmag has some way to control them. So with a dirty 20, you're able to that the balloons that are sprouting

are some sort of fungal situation, and they're spreading amidst the corpse, which is also giving them the gas to fill up the balloon, and it's also giving some of these corpses extra oddities. So the ogre's arms are turning into tentacles and they're just kind of like moving on their own. One has two rings on it, and another has one ring on it. And so he's got these three rings that are just kind of flailing about right now.

At any point, they could hit one of these balloons and maybe explode something. Will y'all give me a nature check, these you two skeletons? Actually, you two. You too. Tippy. That's a two. I've never seen a mickey in my life. That's eight.

Oh, I got a nine. Okay, great. You can just tell if the balloons get to burst level, that wouldn't be good for you. wouldn't be good for people. Like if they get popped or burst, that would kind of suck. That's kind of, you're just like, ugh, they look disgusting and gross. We've got to make sure these tentacles don't pop the, I don't know, is that a corpse fart? I don't know what's inside those doors. Yeah, yeah, some, death methane. A little, death methane. I think we did those rings on those tentacles, guys. I think that one. Yeah, you would be able to connect to that. Each ring

controls one of the three robots. I'm going to try to snatch a ring. Okay, so we're going to roll initiative, because you're getting close within attack range. B, ba, ba. Real initiative now, not prank initiative. Oh my gosh, okay, all right. What if we try to remove the rings as a prank? I rolled a 22. I also got a 22.

What did you get, Dan? I got an 11. 11. Okay, Tippy, you're up. What would you like to do? So what are the tentacles doing? Do I know they're hostile? Are they just flailing dangerously? They're chaotic.

Yeah, they're about four feet long each, longer than an ogre's arm, but they've grown a little bit, and they're just chaotically flailing. It would be tough for them to hit the balloon things right now, but if the balloon things get any bigger, it does seem like they would be able to reach that and then pop it. Tippy, seeing that these tentacles are so hostile,

yells out, we gotta neutralize the fliggy-thiggies. And then I reach into my holster and I throw a rock that I cast magic stone on. Oh, magic stone on? Okay, perfect. And you're trying to what? I'm trying to just throw a magical rock at this tenter. Okay, but you are attacking the tentacle itself.

Yes, I'm going, calm down, mag, mag. So go ahead and roll to hit, I think that's a spell attack. Yes, that's gonna be 12. Yeah, that'll hit. Okay. Yeah, so how much damage does it do to the tentacle? It's a D6 plus three, so that's gonna be five damage. It's an impressive magic rock.

It's a hard magic rock. Okay, so you hit it right smack dab, right on one of its suckers. You can tell it feels it, it flails. The rings are still on. Beyond that, it doesn't look like it does a whole lot. Like the tentacles themselves seem like they're not really controlled by anything. It definitely hurt it, but not in any significant way.

I yelled out. Guys, the rock didn't work. Oh, no. Anything else you want to do any movement? I would say that all of you are about 30 feet away at this point, having investigated, a safe distance. Yeah, I'm gonna keep my distance for right now. Yeah, for sure.

I'm gonna end my turn. I don't think I can do anything else right now. Busy, you're up. Okay, I am going to, oh, she's gonna be mad, I'm gonna cast Unseen Servant. Okay. No, when I do that, I am going, I'm just gonna do Unseen Servant for right now.

Okay, is that Ronnie or something else? That's Ronnie. You're gonna summon Ronnie. Yes. Okay, awesome. So you kinda hear this, woohoo! As your friend Busy summons Ronnie all the way up from the floor and the ghost just pops up right next to her and goes,

all right, all right, I'm down. What are we doing? What are we doing? Hey girl, so here's what we need to do. We gotta go get these rings off of these tentacles, but they're flapping around and they're real big and dangerous. So I was wondering if you might be able to just go in there since it's not gonna hit you.

You're just like, grab them. Ooh, okay, yes, we can sure see if I can. That does look a bit dangerous. Oh, are you seeing these balloon things? That doesn't look too great either. Yeah, but we think that if we get the rings off, then maybe that'll stop them from flailing around and hitting those balloons.

Okay, I mean, we're, I'm here, you're here. Let's go. Okay, do you, is it, are you, Is this gonna be weird? You know, I don't like putting myself into danger, but you know me, I mean, I just, let's do it, right? Can't be too bad. Yeah, it can't be too bad.

Okay, so yeah, you wanna grab them ranks? Yeah, I'll give it a shot. Okay, so Ronnie's gonna make a dexterity saving throw to dodge the two tentacles. Do you want her to go, she's only gonna go for one at one point? Do you want her to go with a tentacle with two rings or one ring? Two rings.

Two rings, of course. Let's see what she does. Yeah, Dirty 20. So she's able to maneuver around the tentacles. So she's able to maneuver around the tentacles and you see her kind of shift up and shift back and do almost like a football play where she's dancing, dancing, dancing with these tentacles.

Now she's gonna do strength and see if she can grapple one of the rings off of this tentacle. Yeah, easy, no problem. She gets both of them. She grabs two rings. and is out of there without any real damage. So she comes back and is like, whoa, that was nuts. I haven't seen that in a long time.

There's a lot of death here. It's so deathy. I'm really, I'm kind of sad about it, but I'm gonna work through it after we get through the problem, like get through the problem, find a solution, and then go and regroup. I think that that's the right order to do that. Oh, this is perfect.

Thank you so much. Yeah, you're totally welcome. Okay, so that's your turn. I'm also gonna call that your bonus action is interacting, so you can't put the rings on in this turn just yet. Anything else you'd like to do? Is there anything, movement or anything? But I don't have a bonus action.

No. No, because I already used it. If I don't have a bonus action, then I'm good. Okay, good. Phibs. All right, so there's one ring remaining. Is that accurate? Okay.

Inspired by the use of an incorporeal being, I think about the first spell I practiced, and that is Magehand. So, Phibbs doesn't even need his spellbook for this one. He feels pretty confident about it. He whispers something into his own hand, and all of a sudden a spectral version of, his skeletal claw appears in the air,

and he sends it off to go pluck the ring from the final ring from the remaining tentacle. Yes, I love that. So I'm gonna make this mage hand also roll a dexterity saving throw to dodge among these tentacles. And do you have a deck saving throw? Yeah, plus one. Plus one. Okay, perfect.

So this will be a DC12. All right, let's call that a four. A four. A four. Hey, okay. Oh no. Okay, so the mage hand doesn't disappear. It's just swatted out of the way.

It emanates from your hand, really strongly, actually. It's actually a pretty impressive mage hand. You're all very impressed by your friend's wizardry. And the mage hand swoops in, heading straight for the tentacle with one final ring on it, and just can't seem to get a firm grasp, even though it is incorporeal, like it is swatted about by this very corporeal tentacle.

Anything else, Dan? Ah, that was really as far as I thought. I'm going to see if I can maybe edge a little bit closer. I don't wanna, how far does it look like the range is on these tentacles? Yeah, there's about five feet. So you're 30 feet away, you'd be fine moving closer.

Okay, I'm gonna like edge up about five feet so I can get a little bit closer and see if I can get a better angle. Yeah, I love that. Okay, everyone roll a perception check. Not 20. Oh, nice. 15.

Uh, seven. Okay, all of you are realizing that the spores, these balloons are growing bigger. Even you recognize that. Even you, with your silly perception check, can see that, TIPI, and you are able to see that the little square-headed robots have turned towards you. And you are able to tell that the elementals

in the glass tubes, one of them on the left side is this close to breaking out in like a few seconds it might just break out of the glass tube. Guys, look at that one over there. It's gonna break out. Well, hopefully that doesn't happen before the blockhead bots get over here. Oh boy.

Oh no. Didn't think this would happen. So actually, it is the Elemental's turn, so they're gonna go, let's see, great. Okay, they do not break free, but you can tell that they are insisting that they're out of there. What is the material that is containing them?

Is it like glass? Oh, okay. And how big is the break in the one that looks like it's about to break, or the crack? Like, how big is that crack? So they're little tiny creatures. The crack itself is probably like a baseball size crack as it keeps ramming its weird head into it.

Okay. But they haven't broken out yet. The three robots are going to come for you. They're gonna just walk right across. They're gonna avoid the tentacles and just come for you. You've seen these before. Like Unzug employs little gadgets like this to run things. You can tell that these.

These are even lower minions than you. They do like one or two tasks, and these guys are very clearly meant to not even control the gates, more like control the steam and the elementals they've got inside of them. So you can do enough math to go, if we have the rings, we'll control the robots who will communicate with the steam elementals.

But they have not been controlled yet, and there's three of them. First one is gonna go for you, Phibs. Oh boy. You were right there in front, so let's see. A 10 to hit? Does not hit. How about that?

And a 12 to hit. That hits. That hits. It's just gonna punch you. It's a little guy and he just comes up and goes, Get out of here, it, it, it. And he misses once, but as you dodge and weave, he goes right back in with the other fist

and you take two bludgeoning damage. The second little guy is gonna come for, actually it's gonna come for Dan too. Sorry, you're just right there. You moved forward. Oops. What was they thinking? Oh, shoot, okay, 21 to hit.

Yeah, I guess that hits. And an eight to hit. So one of them does another two points of bludgeoning damage. And then the third one is gonna go outside of their way to you, busy. Busy Bob and a wave. A 19 to hit and an 18 to hit. Damn, yeah, both of those hit.

Yeah, both of them. Okay, so they say, get away from our door, we protect the door. And you take four points of bludgeoning damage. Ooh, okay. And yeah, you noticeably see the gaseous balloon fill up a little bit more. And the tentacles are just flailing about. It actually doesn't seem like they're doing,

there's not a will behind these tentacles. Do I get to react during this? If you have a reaction, yeah. Well, because my only reaction would be I would want to do like an opportunity and put on the rings. Oh, no. Yeah, all right. No, no, that would be a bonus section of like interacting with an object.

Yeah, I gotcha. Yeah. So not this turn, but next turn, which it is Tipy's turn. We're at the top of the order again. Tipy looks around and sees two robots piecing up his friends. And he's gonna look around and be like, there's no other way. I'm gonna do it.

And Tippy takes his knife out. Right? And he goes, for Antig! For terror! And I run to the tentacle to try to tackle and slice area where the ring is on so I could take the ring. Amazing.

Okay, so you're going to behead the tentacle. That's what I want to do. Basically, okay. What? Oh, no, I'm just excited. Oh, yes, I love it. I was positive you were about to burst one of these balloons.

And I shoot the balloon. Yes, so go ahead and roll, make an athletics check to get up there because it is a five-foot swinging thing. Okay. And then, minus one. Either athletics or I'll say acrobatics as well.

You could do that. Okay, I'll do acrobatics. Okay. then you're gonna actually roll to hit to see if you actually can stop it. So let's see acrobatics first. Acrobatics. So Tippy's running full speed, which is not very fast, with all of his stuff on his back, and that's gonna be 17.

17, you'll get up there, yes, no problem. So now I'll roll to hit. I'll say that you, even though it's not really a grapple check, like you have effectively climbed on it. You're not grappling it, you're not holding it still. But yeah, you're on it, for sure. And then I'm going to roll a hit, so that's gonna be, 15. 15 hits.

15 hits. Yes. Amazing. And then the dagger damage is gonna be six. Great, yeah, I'll say it doesn't beheaded, but with that no problem, you're able to slice it in a way that the ring does like dangle a little bit and loosen. Is it in your grasp? Dexterity, just a, let's see, acrobatics check.

One more time and see if it's in your graph. Acrobatics check, that's gonna be a 13. 13, not quite. So it's dangling. You're fine, the tentacle's not like blasting you and the ring is available for you to grab it next time. And I would say that next time it'll be a free action or if these other incorporeal things are helping,

that would be a free action as well. So you've loosened the grip, the ring wants to come off. You just aren't strong enough, Tiffy. Not today. For sure. Amazing turn. And a little guy didn't attack you, right? Little guy didn't attack me and Tippy realizing the horror show that he's put himself in

is now screaming on top of his tentacle. Yeah, cool. He's shrieking. Amazing, yeah, not happy about it. Busy, you're up. So Busy is gonna grab her sword and is going to also try to just like aim and like cut and aim for like right underneath

where the block meets. The block head, the little robot? Yeah, you'd like to hit the robot. The robot's what's attacking me. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I gotta hit the robot. You gotta hit the robot. Yes, you do, I understand. Okay, so make an attack.

Come on, baby. All right, so that is a 10. A 10 does not hit. Oh, God, oh God. Yeah, they're heavy, metal little guys. Not quite admitting. So yeah, you take your big great sword,

you swing back, you land it, and it just like, bink, and the little guy gets a little confused look on his face, like, grr, get away from the door. Okay, and so I still have my bonus action, right? Yes, you do. For that, okay, for my bonus action, I'm gonna cast Bartik Inspiration. Perfect.

On fibs. Thank you. Fibbs, buddy. I know that you are a wizard, you don't do so much with the E, but you're gonna need to get up, because you could do this, Because we gotta get out of here,

because all of this is very, very scary, and I have to go prove my metal. So I need to get up, but let's. I feel inspired by your positive reinforcement. Very positive, you can totally do this for me. And I shall. Cute, cute. It actually is Fibbs' turn after that too.

So metal, metal, I gotta prove my metal, metal, heating up metal, I know what to do! And I whip out my hands like, like this and cast burning hands on the robots in front of me. Oh my god, I'm both of them. Okay, cool. And that's a cone? That is a cone, a 15 foot cone. Okay.

They have to make a deck saving throw. Yes, they do. Of 13. Is busy in the way or not in the way? No, busy's further away. I'm further up. Oh, got right. I've got two robots.

Two little robots. Okay, so here we go. I would not cast the cone in my friends unless I have to. DC 13? DC 13. All right. Nope.

A five? five, and a three. They do not save. Great, then they take 10 points of fire damage. Wow. Wow, yes they do. Oh, shoot, okay. And any flammable objects in the area

that aren't being worn or carried are now on fire. Okay, cool, so you actually, there might be some corpses that light up, like a little bonfire. These two are still up, but you can see they are scarred and actually their heads are kind of disconnecting. You see little wires. I'm so sorry. Yeah, coming out and they're like,

like they're just not making a whole lot of sense anymore. They're really malfunctioning. But they're not quite disintegrated yet. They're still machines. They still got little hands that are moving about. They could do some damage. Not their little hands. And at that moment, one of the elementals burst through.

Oh no. That one comes for Jason. Sorry, that one comes for Tippy. So what you experience, I mean, it just looks like a puff of smoke, but the way it's moving so quickly, it almost has like a meteor effect, a little tail behind it.

And in the front, it's like this pointing, hooked nose and little eyes that are like, and going straight for you, and it's going to attack you. Tippy's going, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, a 19 to hit. Yeah, that hits, yeah. Yes, you're actually gonna take

two slashing damage as it slashes you up, and two fire damage because it actually is like a really hot, Okay. I mean it's a steam elemental. Hot steam. Yeah, so it's getting you. So you take four total damage. And that'll be that.

Then we've got the three robots. The two on Dan are going to attack him again. Let's see. That'll hit. A four doesn't hit. Thank God. Nine doesn't hit and a five doesn't hit. So only one hits.

Again, two bludgeoning damages. They're just pounding you to death. And then the third one's on you busy. Yeah. And the third one, after shaking its head out of confusion, who's holding the rings? You are? I've got the rings.

You got the rings. You actually notice that its eyes go to the rings, and it almost grasps for it like, like it recognizes the rings, and then it just can't help its nature, and it's going to attack you. A 13 hit? A 13 does not hit. Ooh, okay, cool. So neither does it, it doesn't, nothing hits you. You all see one of the gas spores looks pretty ready to burst.

Looks like it might burst on its own next, in the next few seconds. So the next turn. The other one's a little further from bursting. Tippy. So there's an elemental on me right now. Yeah. Just scratching at me. Mm-hmm.

Basically, like tears and saliva, like just pouring out of Tippy's face, Tippy is going to dive headfirst for the ring that is within reach. Yeah, great. So you, again, it's ready to be grabbed. There's no more rolls that you need to do. But yeah, as you're being flung back and forth on the technical, You actually get really close to the balloon that's about to pop, but you don't quite get it.

But your eyes, as much as they're crying out of fear, you're still able to grab the ring and hold it. Do you want to put it on? I put it on. Okay, as you put it on, the one robot that is attacking Dan doesn't move anymore. It just holds still. It's like, defend the gate, defend, get away from,

and kind of shuts down. What you can also see that that does, it causes one on each side of the steam elementals to burrow back down underground through the tube. So they're gone. They're gone. Yeah. What about the one that was attacking me?

It's still attacking me. It's still attacking. Yeah, it's one at the top. Yeah. So he's still functioning. So was putting on the ring my action or bonus action? That's a bonus action, but you also did, I would say use the action to like grab the ring.

Yeah. I'd be open to maybe another thing that you'd want to do. I have a movement. So I'm going to, I mean, all Tippy wants to do is run away. So Tippy's going to run maximum movement away from his friends while screaming, put the rings on, put them on now!

And just book it. So are you heading towards the gate then? Tippy's not looking. Okay, yeah, you are. You're heading towards the gate. It is difficult to rain because it's covered in corpses. And you are going to inspire an opportunity attack. Okay, for sure.

By the steam elemental, unfortunately. But let's see if that hits. A 12, does a 12 hit? No. It doesn't. So, yeah, the creature does not hit you. You're able to just run. You've got this ring on, yeah, and you bolt towards the gate.

You're still, even with a 30-foot movement, you're not quite at the gate. Got it. Okay. That's my move. Oh, yeah, because it's difficult terrain. You actually are only able to move 15 feet. Got it. Okay.

Yeah, and away from Magmag too. Magma was the tentacle. You're dodging, I assume, away from the balloon as well. Yes. Okay, cool. Busy. Yeah, Busy puts the rings on. Yeah, great, perfect.

As soon as you put the rings on, the other two robots cease what they're doing too and just kind of deflate. Oh, thank God. Yeah, they're done. As they do that, it inspires the rest of the two steam elementals on the right side to go back down underground, and you also see a steam elemental on the left side go down.

However, the one that has been removed from the tube still feels like it's under its own will. Okay. What that does do is not completely, but the gate just holds still down. It's not thrashing up and down anymore. Okay, but it's completely down when it stops, or is it like...

It's completely down. Okay. Anything else you'd like to do? Do I have any other actions? Yeah, putting on the ring was just... You just put it on the rings and it just caused everything to stop, kind of. Is Ronnie still hanging out?

Oh, yeah. Yeah, Ronnie actually is still hanging out. Oh, yeah, no, there's nothing that Ronnie would be able to do to that little elemental... I mean, Ronnie is a member of this dungeon. She kind of is a coward. Like, she just escaped from the adventurers, you know, Yeah.

But yeah, she's part of the dungeon. She can cause terror. Yeah, so I want to send Ronnie over to that elemental. Okay. Yeah. And for Unseen Servant, are you allowed to instruct them to attack? I know that I can make her fetch things. She would fight for you.

She would fight for you right now. I would say that not, we're not going to say that she's just like all the time. But yeah, she's part of this right now. And she's like, all right, I'll get it. I'll mess with that elemental, no problem. Thank you, Boo. You're welcome. D-da-de-dee.

attend to hit, that hits. So she touches it, she just kind of latches onto it and does a hell of a lot of damage. Oh, mm-hmm. I don't know if it'll be enough to kill it, but it might be, it's enough to kill it. Damn. So Ronnie just like-

I'm pissed off Ronnie. Yeah, Ronnie runs, Ronnie flies over and just kind of engulfs the steam elemental, kind of chokes it out, almost suffocates it, like, there's almost like a fire puts it out, and then like a lump of coal just kind of disintegrates, and it goes down to the ground. And she's like, got it, got it, no problem at all,

no problem at all. Yeah, it's done. You're welcome. Oh, dude, you're the best. Thanks. Thank you. Yeah, that was great. All right, good for me.

Hey, gold stars. Cool, and she's just kind of, yeah, floating around real happy, like. That's it for the steam elementals would be next. No, actually it's Phibbs' turn. What do the balloons look like? I would say they're getting there. They're probably like six feet in diameter now.

Like they started at two feet. They've been growing pretty quickly. But yeah, they're at six feet. It looks like they could float up. Here's a thing. Off the top of your head, without looking at your character sheets, you skeletons, are you immune to anything?

Not looking at your character sheets. Yeah, we're, I mean, we can't do, you can't poison us. And then if we get hit bad enough, we can go into a bone pile. Correct. You're immune to poison. Yes. Okay.

You know that should they burst, it would be poison damage that's coming out of these balloons. Right. You know who's not immune to poison? That's true. Tippy's not immune to poison. Is Tippy in the blast radius? At the moment he is. You would need to get, well, hold on, hold on, hold on.

I don't know, hold on. Let me see. Let me see what this blast radius is. Ah. Oh no. Yeah, it's 20 feet. I would say, I'm only 15 feet away. Yeah, I think you're only 15 feet away.

I see that Tippy, he's just running too slow. It's his backpack, it's too big. And so Fibbs runs as fast as he can towards Tippy, and then pulling clumsily out of his little scroll case unfurls the scroll of mold earth and says, Presto changeo, bury my friend and keep him alive, okay? And he summons a bunch of loose earth

to encase Tippy. No one away! And ideally it's densely packed enough that. Amazing. It would not, like kind of like a bulwark, just like, you know like Garra on Narato or you're just like encased, instead of sand, it's just like soil.

Woo-woo, woo-hoo, who-hoo. Yeah, that's your worst nightmare. You're being buried alive all. Also, I mean, as the earth is coming up, it's actually coming, like, bodies are also moving with it. So, like, it's covered in corpses. So, like, the corpses are rising as well,

looking as if, yeah, these undead are coming to life. You can't hear him because he's muffled. He's screaming bone betrayal, but it sounds, boo-woo-woo-woo-woo, woo-woo. I got your body. I think he's saying bone patrol. He's really good name for our group. Oh, that's fantastic.

Okay, perfect. Yes, so Tippy is essentially shielded with black sand, stone, and dirt from the ground. And corpses, and corpses. And it turns out. Great, Phibs. Perfect. Anything else? You just kind of like keep an eye on the balloons

and be like, all right, let's hope this works. Okay, perfect. So it would be the steam elemental turns, but they've been handled, and then it's the robots. They've also been incapacitated for now, stunned at least. And then it is the balloon's turn. One of them will pop. This is the one that would hit Tippy,

And hold on, give me one second, because it also, we do have another player here. Ronnie, I wonder if Ronnie is immune. Can ghosts be poisoned? Can ghosts be poisoned? It's like a Jonathan freaks-ass question. Can ghosts be poison? Can they be poison?

They cannot be poisoned. Okay. But, oh, and they cannot take poison damage. Okay, fine, fine. Okay, she's fine too. So it does burst. And everyone within 20 feet, who is no one, they take a lot of poison damage.

like a lot, but everyone in there is a manse close? Yes, is mimsy close. No, Mimsy and Deb are like 100 feet away. Should have had the Meehan drag Mimsy. Hey kid, I got a balloon with your name on it. Oh boy. Yeah, you'll never find out what that would happen. But what does happen is the balloon with all of its gnarled,

fleshy skin just bursts and all the skin blasts on the gate, on the corpses. It's kind of done and then there's just noxious. just greenish, grayish gas that explodes, and it's gonna take a minute for it to disperse, but for the most part, yeah, no one's in the way. I will say, let's see, I wanna see how strong the shield is of dirt and bodies. I mean, if it's airproof.

I'm no dirt man, so, but. If it's airproof, then I'm probably suffocating. Oh no. You can hold your breath for a really long time. Okay, I can, okay, yeah, it's a fairly long time. As long as you don't panic, you should be okay. You just don't panic. Don't have tippies.

As long as you're cool about being buried alive, you should be okay. What if Tippy's having a full-blown panic attack? You want to suffocate double time? Because the way you suffocate, you can hold your breath. It's like your constitution modifier amount of minutes. Okay, okay, okay. So what's your constitution modifier?

Plus three. Okay, and then after that, you do suffocate, you start dying after your constitution modifier amount of turns, I think. Okay. So, but if you can hold your breath for three minutes, that's plenty of, that's a long, That's a long time in combat. Yeah, it's only 30 rounds of combat.

Okay. And I think I'm getting that right. I may not be, but it's something crazy. Like you're able to hold your breath for a while. But if you're panicking, we could cut that in half and have you only be able to hold your breath for 1.5 minutes and die in one and a half minutes. I think Tiki would be, because he doesn't understand why. Let's do a constitution saving through because this, this poison burst requires that anyway.

And I'll say with the bodies in the dirt, you get, you get to add a plus three to your constitution saving throw. Okay. But it's... Kayak gets my flight, hotel, and rental car right, so I can tune out travel advice that's just plain wrong. Bro, Skycoin, way better than points. Never fly during a Scorpio full moon.

Just tell the manager you'll sue. Instant room upgrade. Stop taking bad travel advice. Start comparing hundreds of sites with kayak and get your trip right. Kayak. Got that right. Introducing the new best skin ever ultra-slim precision concealer. From Sephora Collection. It's full coverage with a matte finish

and perfect for any look, whether you're building it up for a full glam moment or targeting correction for a more natural vibe. At only $12, it's great for affordable touch-ups on the go. Get this new must-have concealer at Sephora or at Sepora.com today. Because DC-15 is pretty high. Because in Tippy's mind, he was fully just trying to run away

and he's like, oh good, Phibbs is here. Phibbs buried him under the earth. Right, right, right. Okay, so maybe you roll at disadvantage. Okay, all coffin, no coffin. All the, okay, with disadvantage. Okay, disadvantage. That's a 10 with disadvantage.

A 10 with disadvantage. Okay, so you're not gonna fully save, but here's what's gonna happen. I'm gonna give you the poison damage. Okay. You're gonna be resistant to it because of the covering that Phibs, yeah, we gotta get that.

I'm gonna give that to you. So let's do that first. So I'm like, Oh, what's that? That is eight points of poison damage. Oh my gosh. Is that with the resistance? Yeah, that's with resistance.

That's happened. Oh. Dupies at four HV. Oh boy. And you do have a disease now. Okay. Okay. Okay, so you didn't get it far enough.

Okay, what kind of disease are we talking about? You inhale plenty of poison gas, not enough to kill you outright, but yeah, you're, You're not feeling great. Gads, like fingernails and claws rake through your throat and your lungs. It feels like knives and needles trying to claw out

from your insides. It is uncomfortable. You want to die. Okay, yeah. Good thing you're already buried a lot. Okay, perfect, yeah. I mean, at least I'm- Roll a D-12 and add your constitution score.

A D-12 and add my constitution. Oh my gosh, all right. Nine plus three, 12? I mean, you feel like you have about 12 hours to live. Okay, just 12. 12 hours. Just 12 to live. 12 hours.

12 hours, okay. A metric would help. But the other thing that happens is your skin goes gray and pallid, and your veins go green. Because of your translucent pallid skin, you're able to see more of your veins. see more of your veins. So this goblin looks heinous if anyone could see him.

But you can't because he's covered in corpses and dirt. Well, hopefully all those corpses will provide additional filtration when this second balloon pops. You're still able to do things. I mean, wait, can I break out of this earthen shell? On your turn, maybe. Okay, got it.

TBD, Tipy. So the meanwhile, Tippy is just. Now, I also will say that the condition that you have is poisoned and poisoned gives you a disadvantage on attack rolls and ability checks. Oh, great, perfect. So like D20 rolls are gonna be difficult for you. But let us remember, you were the one who said

how panicked and suffocating you were. You chose this. What if Tippy's having a full-blown panic attack? You wanna suffocate double time? It's true, Tippy would have be absolutely panicking out of his mind if he was suddenly, We're inhaling faster. The poison would at least get in there.

Yeah. Okay. Poor Tippy. But that was Phibs' turn. I hope that helped. Okay, we have an option here because everything's been neutralized so we can break out of combat. We can break out of turn base. Okay.

Or we can stay in turn base until we figure out what to do with Tippy or for Tippy. Should we take a long rest and stay here for eight hours? Well, I was going to do. I have something. Well, I can. I can help. So initiatives over, the gate is down at the moment. It's no longer thrashing.

On some level, you have fixed the gate. Does seem like there's a hole in the glass tubing. Tibby seems protected, as far as you can tell, Phibbs. Well, the job well done. And Deb and Mimsy are looking on. And then you've got the wall monster, which you never learned his name, but he does have a name. Wallace.

Actually, yeah, Walsie. He's looking on as well. So you've got some bystanders. Now that everything seems to be neutral. The tentacles themselves are flailing, but less enthusiastically, and it does seem like they'll eventually just coast down. Oh, there is one thing, there is another spore growing.

Busy, like, goes up to the pile of bodies and dirt that Tippy is under, and just starts kind of, like, moving and try to dig him out. Yeah, as you dig him out, Phimps, what are you up to? I also run over to make sure that Tippy's okay. Yeah, you can tell he's still alive, so that gives you hope.

The minute you understand, cover even part of his skin, it just looks completely monstrous. Which is nothing you haven't seen before, but this monster should look fresh, juicy, bubbly, fat. And he looks, yeah, nothing short of completely pallid. Tippy sucked in a big gasp of air like, yeah, bloodshot eyes, like dilated pupils. Oh wow. What happened?

If I hadn't buried you alive, that could have been really bad. You've got a... Why did you do that? You've got a swollen tongue. I don't know why, but I think I'm a godder. Yeah, you don't look so good. Yeah, you look terrible. I don't feel good.

Do we know what he has? Have we seen this before? I think I have 12 hours left I lift about. That's oddly specific. I know. Roll a medicine check, both of you can roll a medicine check. Actually, you can too. Okay.

Okay. 16? 14. I don't know how I would know this. You know that he has a disease. You know this does look like someone who is, actively poisoned, he's not dead, it happened fast, but it does seem like it's something that could be a slow burn into death, as opposed to, oh, we've got three minutes.

I think you murdered me. Oh, I think I've been murdered. I don't think this was me. I was running away, why it just put me in a dirt hole. You were running very slow. Was that running? Yeah! I thought that you were kind of like, just like fast walking.

Oh, there's a lot of stuff on my back. No, that makes it, plus all that flash, the flesh is probably slower. It's easier, and then also, like, we've got, like, you know, the wind and everything goes just right through us. We're permeable. In that dirt hole, there were corpses, there were dirt, and the poison somehow seeped through, didn't protect me at all, and I think I'm going to die. Are there any visible, like, wounds, or is it just poison damage? No visible wounds, yeah. It all seems to be internal. Here, take one of these, and I open my rib cage,

and I take out a healing potion and give you that. I snatch it out of his hands, and I, like, greedily drink all of it. Like, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh. Okay, 2D4 plus... Okay. 2D4 plus 2. Let's see, that's a 4. Oh, 4!

8, that's max. It says 10, killed for 10. Okay. Wow, you're healthier than when you first went in there, apart from the whole being diseased and having 12 hours to live thing. But am I still... Based on your guest.

You're diseased after that healing potion? Yes, you are. Got it. And you're still poisoned. Got it, okay. You hear Deb go, All right, thanks for fixing the door. We just gotta get it open, which I think we can handle from here.

You're gonna need to leave those rings with us. Well, I mean, we're the ones with the rings. Do you have anything that can help heal our friend here from all of the poison and the diseases? Well, we don't really do that for non-union. We don't really do that. that. Well, but he's a contractor and this happened on your work site, so that means this must be covered by ghost stuff. I guess the short answer specifically, I cannot do anything about that. The wall monster is kind of pressing and going, so I could do, I can do something. So, I can do something. So there, uh, uh, a guy. Yeah.

Well guy help. I mean, if you're dead, I've got 12 hours left 11. Oh, come here, baby. Come here, baby. And like 30, 30 hands give you a love. I, I, uh, tipy just resigns and to the hug, so he's like, he's into it. He's just hugging the wall right on. Little old poison you can't hurt, immune to poison me. It's okay, it's okay. And yeah, he gives you a hug. So he says, I just don't, I just don't,

the thing is I don't wanna be, I don't wanna be the one breaking any rules. So Deb, I just would need your, go ahead. And Menzie guys, um, so actually, I don't think that we can really help the government without breaking a whole lot of union rules. And by the way, Tippi, I know your name, but for now, I'm just calling you

the goblin. Because to make sure that you know that I don't care about your name, links to Deb, like, because I'm a union worker. So, Jellon Thor, oh, well, that's his name, but he... You strike me as a Jol and Hall. Yeah, he's had like a Jellinthor situation. Okay,

so he says, okay, okay, come here, baby. You know what? Deb can do what she wants. You can do what you want for me, but I'm healing this goblin. He just saved our door, and he You cast lesser restoration on you, and you feel the disease move out of your body. Your eyes go back to normal dilation, the blood shots removed, you get some color back.

That being said, you can still feel poison. I feel gross, yeah. The poison isn't going to kill you, but remember, with the poison condition, you get disadvantaged. On all attack and ability. On attack, and ability. So all D20 rolls.

So unfortunately, lesser restoration can only heal one of those things. I'll take that. You must. Yes. He must and you will. I think. You must be will.

So Jelanthor goes, I can't do too much more, but hopefully that'll just be enough for you to get on out into the world. And your name, Kydwall? It is Jelanthor. Jeline Thor. It's a great name.

You don't have another spell slot? If you're one more spell? I- Restoration times two, maybe. Okay, look. I understand that you need that, and I'm, Look, I'm already tempting fate here in the union, you know? I understood.

I'm just poisoned, you know. I'm just poison. That's poison is coursing through my veins. And, yeah, look, I've got a lot of arguments with this union. For sure. The whole FU is like not completely, you know, on top of board. Does it protect its workers? I don't know, you know.

Right, right. But the answer to you is, no, I don't. And even if I did, I just, I have to stay in this union. I need it. That's okay, Bell and Thor. Jell and Thor. Gel and Thor. Sorry about that. That's okay.

M-hm-you'll be okay, mu-mo-mo-m-m-gives you a kiss on the forehead five times with five different mouths. Tiffy loves that. Yeah, Tippy likes kissing stone things. Tippy blushes and walks away. Thanks, Jell and Thor. All right, so how about those rings? Can we get the rings back then?

Tippy walks in with a gusto now that he's not diseased. Definitely still poison, but he's like, We just wrist, bone and limb, to try to get this door open. And I almost died if we had waited 12 hours almost. Okay, well, we have to do robot repairs, and then also it seems as though those rings control these robots, but we have to attune to them, so that needs time and what you're going to carry around three robots that actually control elemental? Like, what good would that do you?

A lot of good, actually, that sounds like that could do a lot of things. Weird. Can we have a sidebar really quick? Yeah, we're gonna take the rings, right? Yeah, we're gonna take these rings. The rings. We're definitely taking these rings. We've got to take the rings.

We gotta close to the race anyway. Why don't need to open the door? We take the reins, we close the door, and that's it. That's about it, right? That's about the whole plan. And then we, well, and we take the robots. Oh, yeah. Take the robots and the elemental is like everything they need, we take.

Okay, you would know, you would know, Tippy. I'm just gonna jump in here. You would know that the rings, they work if you are within 30 feet of the robots. robots. That's why Magmag was always at the entrance. You're not attuned to the rings yet, so you don't know what they do, but you know that putting them on did cause the robots to incapacitate and demobilize. Once you're attuned to them, you could get to know the two tasks that they were programmed to do. One of them, you're pretty sure is defend the door, because they were attacking you saying defend the door. The other one, something to do with the steam

elementals. Either way, we take the rings and we trap Mouthey-Mimsy in this dungeon until we could figure out what to do. Yeah, yeah. We want other people coming in here. This way, when we do get Eun-ZUG and Unzug comes back, A, we kept everything good for you, and no more people got in, there'll be less people for him to worry about when we get back.

Right. And no more pesky, corpse, poisonous gas bubbles, because more people come in, more bodies stack up, and more bubbles happen. Yeah. Right? We're kind of doing them a favor, really, if you think about it.

We're doing them a favor. Fibb's you in? I'm in. Yeah, yeah, tell him, Fibb. I was just gonna say, why don't you just wait right inside the other side of the door and we... Like where I am now? Yes, like don't, don't move.

Because the door mechanics are complicated and like if you move, like it would mess everything up. But you are leaving. Yeah. Yeah, we are leaving. We are leaving. And we will throw you the rings. After.

As the door's closing. As they close. I'm going to hide the rings. So just like kind of stealthily take them off. And then I'm gonna cast a disguise self, which just looks like me, but me wearing the rings. Okay. Oh wow, okay.

And you have two. I've got two. And you've got one. Are you still wearing yours? Yeah. Okay. Yeah, so mine, I'm gonna like hide. In fact, I'm gonna actually see if I can,

is Ronnie still hanging out? Yeah? Yeah. I'm gonna like kind of gesture to Ronnie, give the rings to Ronnie and then cast a sky's self. So it just looks like I'm still wearing the rings. Okay, so Ronnie has the rings. Okay, so I'd like, are you giving them to me or not?

We're gonna use them to get up out of here. Okay. And then you see, I've got, and then we'll slide them on under the door. To throw them to you. Yeah, throw them to you. Fastball. We don't wanna get mimsied on this. Yeah, we don't wanna get mimsy.

Deception, right? This is deception. Yes, this is definitely deceptive. Let's see. Natural 20 is a 22. with my modifier. Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, okay. It's a three for me.

Okay, well, we'll say that you were doing the bulk of the talking. Great, so she says, okay, but once you're past the gate, you throw the rings through to me because we can't operate this gate without these robots. Absolutely. So you're not attuned to the ring yet, which means you actually can't communicate to the robot, but you can still have the ring. Okay, great. So the robot's just going to be there. So do you operate the door to open just a little bit? You'd be able to do that.

No problem. The steam elementals are down there. You walk out. Deb and Mimsie are moving towards you. You let the gates shut. And the robots and the steam elementals are still within the dungeon. Yes.

Yeah, that's fine. Okay. Then that is what happens. For the first time in your lives, you're on the outside of Eun-Zug's lair. Ronnie's still here, but she's not causing any mischief. She holds on to the rings. Okay.

And she says, hey, I'll, I'll probably hang out with you sometimes. I just have to, this has to be my home base. I have to stay here. And Deb says, wow, you're not part of the union. And Ronnie says, oh, shove off. And she just like disappears. Like there's nothing Deb can do about that. So the gate closes behind you.

And you watch as Ronnie gives her goodbye. And all three of you turn and look at the landscape known as the desolation, which you have never before in your lives seen. You've been under this mountain for five years. All you can remember is the darkness. On the horizon, there's mountain cracks and ridges and maybe even mountains higher than Eunzug's. Maybe Eunzug's lair isn't actually the tallest of the mountain crags. And all of you are thinking how much it is scary to leave your homes, but as you look out at the horizon, you feel a sense of optimism, hope, certainly adventure, and a question, a curiosity that permeates your hearts.

What if I and my life are more? And with that, you level up to level of. Let's go. All right. Hey. And we will end the episode there, and I can't wait to see what you will all do with your newfound agency. I have more bones now. More bones!

I have more goblin me. Metaphorically. No, literally. You said I leveled. Each rib cage has like 20 bones on it now. Oh, God. Thank you so much for watching and listening. and listening to Goblin Mode.

Stay tuned for next time. We can cut this out? Yes, please. Okay, how can- Leave it end. No, this is, this is the content. Nah, this is that grind. That's what you like?

This is gameplay. It's what you like in your actual plays? Oh, you like D&D? The war is over and both sides lost. Kingdoms were reduced to cinders, an army scattered like bones in the dust. Now the survivors claw to what's left of a broken world, praying the darkness chooses someone else tonight.

But in the shadow dark, the darkness always wins. This is old school adventuring at its most cruel. Your torch ticks down in real time. And when that flame dies, something else rises to finish the job. This is a brutal rules-light nightmare with a story that emerges organically based on the decisions that the characters make. This is what it felt like to play RPGs in the 80s, and man, it is so good to be back. Join the Glass Cannon podcast as we plunge into the Shadow Dark every Thursday night at 8 p.m. Eastern on YouTube.com slash the Glass Cannon with the podcast version dropping the next day.

See what everybody's talking about and join us in the dark. The world of Sonic the Hedgehog has been thrust into a not-so-dark, not-so-stormy, hard-boiled detective story that probably Nobody saw it coming. Follow Sonic and the Intrepid Chaotic's detective agency as they take on their biggest case yet. This high-flying action-packed adventure will take them across the world, fighting for every clue they can fight.

It's one heck of a tale, which is good, because this story might be the only thing that can save their lives. Well, if that's all, I can just dispose of you. Wait, what? All will be revealed in. Sonic the Hedgehog presents the Chaotics Case Files. Listen now, wherever you get your podcasts.

When the Chaotics are on the case. Look, we all know there are a lot of celebrity interview podcasts out there, but there's only one happy, sad, confused. I'm Josh Harrowitzin. Yeah, I'm the host of the show, so I'm a little biased, but truly happy, say, I'm confused is the place for nerdy and intimate conversations with all your favorite actors and filmmakers. From Andrew Garfield and Scarlett Johansson to Christopher Nolan and Quentin Tarantino for over

10 years and over 700 episodes, Happy Say I Confused has broken movie and TV news every single week. That's because I ask all the questions I want to know and more importantly, you want to know. Casting what ifs, backstage stories, acting pet peeves, and much. much more. So whether you're into superheroes, prestige TV, or just the coolest actors and directors alive, you're going to learn something in every episode. Listen to Happy Say I Confused on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.