Critical Role & Sagas of Sundry - Life After Death (w/ Ross Bryant) | Sagas of Sundry: Goblin Mode | Episode 12
Episode Date: January 6, 2025After the death of a dear friend, The Terror Squad must journey to the Ethereal Realm to try and save him. But what they find there is more than they bargained for…and may bring some uncomfortable m...emories back to the surface. Special guest Ross Bryant (MST3K, Improvised Shakespeare Company, Dropout) joins the table for an unforgettable new episode of Sagas of Sundry: Goblin Mode! Goblin Mode is also available wherever you get your podcasts: https://lnk.to/goblinmodepod Learn more and sign up for the Geek & Sundry newsletter at https://www.geekandsundry.com/! Subscribe to Geek and Sundry: http://goo.gl/B62jl Twitter: http://twitter.com/geekandsundry Facebook: http://facebook.com/geekandsundry Instagram: http://instagram.com/geekandsundry TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@geekandsundry Sagas of Sundry: Goblin Mode is a Geek & Sundry production made in partnership with Realm. Official camera partner: Fujifilm -- Visit https://shopusa.fujifilm-x.com for more! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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Hello, everyone.
And welcome to Sagas of Sundry Goblin Mode.
I'm your dungeon master, Amy Vorpal,
and with me as always is your favorite terror squad.
Hi everyone, I'm Dan Casey, I play Phibs, a skeleton wizard.
I'm Danielle Radford, I play busy,
I am a skeleton who is also a bard rogue.
Hey, I'm Jason Wynn.
I play Tippy, who is a goblin artificeer.
Was.
Was.
Was, yes.
And with that,
reminder, we will take the time to part the veil of reality.
And we are actually no longer four buds,
sitting around a table, having a good time,
playing a game surrounded by a really cool set dressing,
cameras pointed at our faces.
We are not.
Instead, we are underwater in the earned-cur fathom,
a place that,
but by all right should be whimsical, light-hearted, fun, weightless, but it is actually
very weighty because one of our party members, Tippy, the goblin from Eun-Zug's
lair, did in fact perish last episode and where we find ourselves now is Phibs, the
skeleton, holding on to Tippy's body with one goblin ear, his left ear, completely ripped off.
shooting down channels and tunnels this way and that way, directed completely by a current
that seems to have complete control over the path and busy.
With the knowledge that Luxier has seen her face and knows her,
she's also following Thresh, the sea spawn, through these channels,
completely submissive to the currents that take them.
Now, where you are dumped out of these caverns,
after twisting and turning, you see that on your way,
you could have made many different turns,
and somehow this current is pulling you very, very confidently
towards one way.
Do you completely submit to this current?
Yeah, Phibbs is in such a state.
His adrenaline is up, but it's sort of draining a little bit
because he's sort of reckoning with the fact
that he's finally safe with his dead friend,
so he's just letting the current take him away
and just embracing the darkness.
Yeah, Busy's fully in shock.
Everything that just happened is some of the most
disturbing stuff that Busy has ever seen.
And so as long as she has eyes on those two,
she's just kind of going with it.
I don't know if she would even have energy
to be able to fight it at this point.
You're no stranger to blood
after seeing so much of it spilled in the Abysseum.
Where you're unceremoniously
released from this current is the cellar-like room that is like an underwater cove full of grasses
that you remember being in when you first got to earned curfathom, where Thresh took you and told
you about the obligation. Thresh guides you to, you two skeletons, as well as Pakara and
Krandall and Loof, all of whom are safe, that guides you to the geologist workshop that you
you climb out of and you just find yourself there.
The only thing that's different this time,
beyond all the bottles and the specimens
and the spheres that hold different plants in animal lives,
you also see a very thick and very strong-looking merman.
Every feature of him is just dark, dark hair, long hair,
dark skin, dark facial hair,
dark eyes, everything about him seems really, really intense.
And as magic users, surrounded by this Ernstker Fathom magic,
you can tell that this person is a castor of masterful.
He's a master caster.
And he looks at Thresh and goes, what happened?
What happened?
And Thresh goes, I don't know whether we have time to explain,
but this one's dead.
However, we were able to say,
Have Unzug's guy.
And Crandall still got the goo on his face,
and he just kind of waves from the corner, like,
and the man goes, but one of these people who helped you,
they are dead.
And Thresh goes, yeah, look, we're gonna have Scythe Varylia
down on next, okay?
They saw them.
And the Merman leaps into action and says,
you cannot stay here.
This would be dangerous for me and for you.
We'll leave, but can you save him?
Not here, not now, not with the time that we have.
Here's what I will do.
You know, I have directed these currents to land you here.
Give me one second, and you see him go into his brain
and he snaps out of it and goes,
okay, I've redirected the currents to take them closer to Shoe's Castle.
If they are trying to follow the current, they will not lead here,
but Thresh, tell the obligation what has happened,
make yourself scarce, and Thresh, okay, but you're gonna be a lot.
But you're gonna be okay?
He goes, I am Gagongen.
Thresh goes, oh, got it.
Okay, yeah.
And swims out the front door,
but it gives you a quick goodbye.
Really no ceremony here, just off to business.
Gagangen says, I don't have much time.
I'm going to have to do something that is quite dangerous,
but it's the only way.
I will take you to the ethereal realm.
The ethereal realm?
It is the place where you are technically
from as undead, a place of mist and fog and spirits.
You will be fine there.
Okay, what about Tippy?
Tippy is dead.
But he can come back.
You brought Kaya back.
Yes, I did bring Kaya back.
Can you bring Tippy back?
It will be easier in the ethereal realm.
Okay.
It will be faster.
Okay.
When he does come back, he will be in more danger,
but it is the only way at the moment.
If I stay here and do it, we will not have time.
We'll do whatever it takes.
So he moves his hands a little,
and as magic users, you can feel that he's like arranging the weave,
the same way that he has arranged the currents.
The temperature changes around you in the water
as it rises and then falls,
and you just get the sensation of heat and then cold
across the different parts of your body.
There's not much movement to him,
but soon right in front of him, below him,
there's a puddle that forms in the sea floor
and he looks at each one of you and says,
this will take you there, I'll be right behind you.
Still carrying Tippy, I bring him through.
Are you coming with us?
I will be right behind you.
Once again, Fibbs tips back with Tippy
through this new portal.
Yeah, I'm busy just follows.
Pekara and Crandall follow you.
I'm gonna say Luf is with you again, once more,
and you find your way through seconds later,
once you've appeared, Gagongan returns behind you as well.
Now, where you find yourselves is actually fairly comfortable to you two skeletons.
As he said, it is a land of fog and mist.
There's just something a little different.
There is gravity, but you yourselves do not walk.
You don't touch the floor.
Is there a ground?
It's hard to say.
Is it just clouds?
But you are floating.
You're just floating upright.
And you're not swimming either.
Doing physical things, including walking, they're different.
Your mind matters more than your body here.
Fibb suddenly feels like tippy's a lot lighter to hold.
Absolutely.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Items and bodies, they don't have the same mass.
They don't have the same weight.
It's almost like you're holding a memory of the item as a
post of the item itself.
And that's doubly true for Tippy, who is dead.
Oh, another thing I forgot to say is,
all of the saturation in this place
is pretty gone too, as far as color goes.
So everything is way more gray.
That being said, quickly Gagongan in his Murphoke body
grabs some of the fog that feels clammy,
and it almost bridges the gap between a solid and a liquid.
And he grabs a lot of it and starts forming
a gurney-like table right in front of you all.
And it takes him seconds.
But that doesn't seem weird to you.
You're like, well, yeah, he was thinking of something
and he built it and this makes sense.
And Tippy would love this place.
Yeah.
He says, lay your friend down here.
And we don't have Tippy's ear, right?
After they horrifically ripped it off, it was elsewhere.
Phibb's imagines what it would look like
if there was like a little fog ear there
and to see what would happen.
Yeah, so using your mind and also your hands
craft together an ear that Phibs,
Do you roll a slight of hand check?
Let's see what this thing looks like.
Well, it's certainly slight.
That's a 10.
That's a 10.
It's a human ear.
Oh, no.
So you have crapped to-
I only know what one kind of ear looks like.
Yeah.
You've imagined this and it is, it's round,
it's also very small, and you've made a flesh-colored ear
while tippy, as we remember, is green.
So he now has an ear just not in the same way
that I think you wanted it to be.
Ah, geez.
Well.
You know, uniformity is for the birds,
so I think that.
And since he's a wear bird.
That's perfect.
And luf on your shoulder now,
outside of your body, has grown even just a little bit more,
almost the size of a melon as opposed to the softball.
Oh, wow.
And she says, Uncle Tippy, what happened to him?
Uncle Tippy's going to get all better.
We are here with, oh, his name isn't Uncle Tippy.
Oh, I'm sorry. I apologize.
It is Unky Tippy is gonna be all better.
We brought him here.
He's just resting right now.
Yeah, he's all tuckered out from all the terror he caused.
So much terror.
I did see him cause terror.
Did you see the terror that I caused?
I sure did.
You did such a good job and busy just like pets.
I could have done better.
Obviously, it's just, I'm not quite big enough.
If yet, I was doing things, but I couldn't save him.
Proportionate to your size, that's so much terror.
Why does that have to be a caveat?
Every little bit of terror goes a long way.
Mm-hmm.
And Pekara, actually, you see her in her shell bikini,
next to Crandall in his shell bikini.
I forgot about that.
I forgot about that.
They, they, well, Pekara goes up to the gurney
and actually rests a hand on Tippy's chest.
and pulls it back and goes, he's so cold.
Not for long.
Right?
I had a feeling they wanted to tell me something.
Maybe he will tell you again soon.
I feel like Chab told me you had something to tell me.
He did, and you are going to hear it from Tippy.
You don't want to hear from Chab.
No, I don't.
But it's just I saw him.
He was, uh, I don't know what he was thinking,
But he was doing a really brave job out there.
He was thinking about you.
We came to save you.
It was Timi's idea.
No, me.
I'm nobody.
Why would you come and save me?
You know, we could say it's what the mark to do,
but Tipy will tell you himself.
Yeah.
I gotta tell you guys something.
You know, I'm part of this polycule.
Jesus Christ.
Oh, uh, that's great.
No, no, that's not what I wanted to say.
I just, it's just that everyone, I'm not really, you know, I'm just in the group, but
everyone seems to have romance or figured out.
Polecular structures are constantly shifting and changing with-
Well, that's the thing, I'm so confused by it because I'm not really, it's like I'm there,
but not really interested, and then here comes this guy and he's, you know, weird, you know,
but also, kind of in an interesting way.
There was a part of me that was like, I don't know,
wanted to try out some things that I've seen
the pollicule people do, but it didn't quite work.
Oh, you should really tell Pippi this.
You should tell Tippy everything.
No, but I did.
I mean, I didn't give him a one, willie.
Oh, see, for a lot of us, that's kind of like a thing
you do with your bros.
And Bissie just like takes off one of our fingers
and kind of like jams it into the hole in the skull
where that would be.
See, like this isn't doing anything,
Because we're bros.
I got it all screwed up and I just,
I just didn't have time, you know, to try out.
One more thing I thought I would try out.
Well, whatever you do, don't tell us what that one more thing is.
You have to wait until Dippy.
And don't do it now, like wait until he's alive.
That seems very poor.
I'll just, yeah, I was all right, I'm not,
I won't do it, it's just,
just feel like someone had to know I'm disappointed I was.
Oh.
But you said you can bring him back.
And Gagong goes, well, if you would get off of the guy,
I would help him.
That also comes later.
And Crandall actually goes,
well, seems as though I can think myself into a very bespoke suit.
Crandall, I wish you would stop bespeaking right now.
I've had it up to here with you.
We will talk later, but right now, besolent, please.
Silence suits you.
It's just that it seems as though this man wants my advice on Unzog,
and so maybe I'm more of an important part of the situation than you'll think.
You are so important, and we are gonna put a pin...
Oh my God, and your importance, you are very important.
Right now we have very important tippy saving business.
And then, yes, everything that you know about
Unzug is very important and you are very needed and if it helps you to be calm to
bespeckle a suit or like whatever just do that somewhere where it doesn't affect
what's happening here with Gagongan and Gagin and goes yes actually if you could go
very far away we will find you before we leave and Crandall suits himself up in
ethereal ectoplasomy fog and wanders away and
That tailoring looks like .
It's awful, doesn't he know any?
It's about flow, and I'm just not seeing any flow.
What is that collar dab?
No, I agree.
Drake.
It's dripping.
This man has clearly been in a dungeon for too long, but he's gone now, thank goodness.
He says, so I will begin the resurrection process.
Now, if what I hear is true based on you and the southern goblins recounting,
this man stood up to the side of Aurelia.
He did.
Mm-hmm.
And from what I hear too, you,
Skeleton were not completely innocent.
You literally threw a dart at Luxir.
Yeah, I-
Hit him too.
You weren't there.
First of all, I never hit anything.
So the fact that I hit him is, it is, uh,
pretty impressive.
Yes, and unexpected.
But also, the sight of that bloodbath
and Kaya was not a good person,
but no one ever deserves to go like that.
And I couldn't stand by and just watch
that happened, I was just trying to make it so that would stop.
I understand. My point is I see that you are casters and you access magic. However, you are weaker than I. And even I do.
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Not do this.
Because I am scared.
You must either be the bravest goblin and skeleton crew I've ever seen.
We're the stupidest.
Or both.
But we are of like mind.
This evil has no place in our world.
It can only beget more.
Are you familiar with Isajar, the philosopher?
I've heard of Isajar, but I haven't read...
Yeah, it's been like a while.
If you could just like give us a refreshment on Isajar.
He has many theories around what happened around the searing.
And when the Sundari and the Fraxis merged and disappeared and all of that.
And he is the one who brought forth the idea that merging five artifacts of the Sundari champions
would bring back Fraxis or bring back all of them or...
all of them or, but he has this other idea.
And this is the idea that I think Unzug was after, that there is one artifact that is less
an artifact than more of a being that trumps all of them that would render our entire material
plane completely safe or decimated depending what you do with it.
You said Unzug is after that.
We have our suspicions and the obligation we've been tracking Unzug's movements and
We don't know whether he is currently,
but when he was in the Earnker Fathom,
he was doing a lot of research about this.
The reason I bring it up is because here is a brave goblin.
And the artifact is called the scurulita hyoid.
And scurulita, among other meanings,
is the scientific word for a goblin.
The hyoid being, you as skeletons, no bones.
Yep.
Yes.
And Phibb points to the hyoid.
Correct.
It's in the neck, right?
It is in the neck.
Definitely something I knew.
So anyway, Isajar writes about this,
it calls it the Skirleitha hyoid.
We believe that this is what Unzug might be after
because he has stopped even caring about the five articles,
so you see the math I'm drawing.
You need his throat bone.
I don't need anything.
Isajar and these powerful artifacts, they are not
for me. I'm content with the power that I have over the sea and the currents, but it would
be mad for me to think that this goblin's hyoid is in fact the artifact that will save the
world, but I will say, Isajar is very clear that it comes from a hero. And you being aligned
with me, and what if this goblin matters more than I think? I will do the resurrection for free.
Really? Thank you. Thank you so much.
We can pay.
We have gold.
Okay, what do you offer?
Because he just starts, like, rifling through and just like pulling gold out.
Just like, how many is?
Got a hundred gold?
I don't have time to count it.
This is more important.
This might be something that is written about in history books, so it is of no consequence to me.
In the meantime, maybe you give me space.
I will keep the little goblin and the little spider.
And Louvre?
She says she wants to help.
She does want to help.
help she loves her uncie tippy.
If you need to glue two things together,
she's got some great webs.
As this is all happening,
Tippy, you find yourself in the same place
and you feel lighter than you've ever felt in your life.
No responsibilities, complete freedom,
you have no real memories.
They're kind of gone, which also is a burden lifted.
And you're just Tippy as Tippy, like who he was
when he was six or seven, you know,
Tipy, the guy who played
with little sticks and...
Whoa.
I'm floating.
Yeah, and there's infinite mass to play with and build things with.
I'll make a...
What should I make?
I know what to make.
I'm gonna make a really cool goblet.
Yeah, maybe the strongest goblin warrior who's ever lived,
and I'll name him Whippy.
You're toying around with this ectoplasm,
you easily build your toy action.
figure and then you notice right in front of you are people and they would be they might be
really fun to show your toy to and and these people are a big giant merman and and a little
goblin girl and a bikini and oh oh you also see two skeletons they actually look pretty
they actually look really serious they're talking about serious stuff but but you think maybe maybe
that your action figure would help them.
Well, every warrior has a fair maiden to rescue,
so I'll make a goblin, a goblin maiden.
And I'll name this Lippy Lady.
Lippie Lady.
Lippy lady.
Lippy and wippy.
And I'll save you.
And no, don't, I mean, yeah, save me.
And you're putting on this show for, gosh,
you know, it only seems like yourself,
because it's not really doing much.
No one's looking at you.
Hey, hey, stop talking about boring stuff
and look at this.
Oh, I'm here to take the castle from you.
The evil overlord is so evil.
Isn't this cool?
It's a wonderful play that you're putting on.
And again, no one's watching.
You see that the Merman and the goblin
are bent over a project, and maybe they're
working on their own project.
Tippy in this flash of annoyance and anger not being able to control it, he goes,
Hey! Hey! What's wrong with you guys? I'm doing something cool here.
And you see the Murman look at the skeletons and gesture at the project he's working on, head bent down.
The other goblin, you know, also waves at the skeletons, like, you know, get out of here and she bends down over the project they're working on.
You're no different. From everybody I talk to, you know, I do cool things and you do.
You just don't see.
I'm right here.
I'm doing the best show I've ever done.
And you don't even care.
You care about your boring stuff.
And you fly into their faces trying to get their attention.
And as you realize you go into a little bit of self-pity
and you look down and you see the project
that they're working on is you.
Oh, that goblin looks like me.
What's up with his ear?
What's going on there?
That can't be.
me because I have both my ears and I check my ethereal self to feel my ears are they
there? Your ethereal self your left ear is not there. Wait a minute, wait a minute,
wait a minute, wait a minute and Tippy looks at the real now realizing that this is
probably him starts to cower and back away from the body. Yeah and as you're having this
super existential moment. We're back to the undead people and the alive people as
they're working on Tippy. Gagongan says this is where you are from. It might be
good for you to explore and see what happens. This is not a normal realm. Who
you are and who you have been, they will attract different things that might
guide you in some way when you return to the material plane. Yeah, I guess we can
kind of take a stroll.
Take a peek around.
I mean, he's actually from Clea, but.
So I'm told.
So you sound.
What is it that you would like to do?
I think what Busy's gonna do is
Busy almost sends out, since there's all of this kind
of ephemeral stuff we can make things with.
Yeah.
Busy just starts making like little stones
and seeing like what happens is she like,
almost like a cobblestones on a path and walking
looking through them and kind of seeing if she makes one and tosses it out like where it goes and where it starts like sending.
You just throwing rocks?
Well yeah, but you're just kind of feeling like if maybe if there is stuff here to see and things don't work like anything
maybe this will become some sort of like skeleton, you know like skeletic road or something where like leads us to like something that might be around.
You toss a stone and you're thinking of a road that guides you and absolutely the cobblestone attracts more cobblestones they all fill together and form.
a pathway. It looks like the pathway does do some winding, but, and again, you can really only see 50, 100 feet in front of you, but it does look like it slowly meanders up.
After you?
Don't mind if I do. I guess I'll take point on this.
So, yeah, you follow this pathway, and soon enough, the ectoplasm is denser in some areas and lighter in others. It swirls, it's almost, there's some meteorology to it. There's weather, climate.
There actually seems to be two and now three forms
that are really viscous and hard to see through.
And they appear standing right in front of a building
that does look like it is both made of stone and wood,
kind of havesies.
One seems like dwarven stonework,
the other seems very natural-based,
wood and plaster.
And it's a structure that you might really see
on the material plane very easily.
And as you approach this building,
you see three figures form in front of the building.
The first one is a female dwarf in full metal armor
with a laurel crown on her plate mail.
And an ectoplasm version of a circlet atop her head.
The next figure that you see is another female dwarf.
And this dwarf has metal armor, and on her metal armor
is an eye on fire with a halo on top of it.
And in her breastplate is a quill with an armadilla charm
hanging from it.
And she actually has three braids,
although it looks like there should be a fourth.
The next figure that you see is an elf with long
long blonde hair, stately, wearing princely robes and a crown himself.
He has a sigil of an open book on his robes and he is wearing a necklace with a square
jade pendant on it.
He says something, but before he says something, I would love to welcome Ross Bryant to the set.
Yay.
Just squeeze, squeezes this.
Hi, Ross.
Thanks for joining us.
Of course.
So this elephant, the skeleton are approaching you
with two other dwarves and you see Phibs and busy.
What do you say?
It's a big day for us.
Big day for me.
It is, isn't it?
Hey, get a load of this guy.
I'm at a loss for words.
I feel like I've seen you.
Oh, I haven't just seen you.
I felt you.
I'm sorry.
I'm freaking out of me.
This is like looking in a freaking mirror.
I am, I am too.
I feel like you and I were, we're, we're, I just, I've waited to meet you for a really long time.
I knew you were out there.
What is happening?
Do you think today might be our day?
We've been living, uh, I say living.
in sort of a liminal space where time really has no meaning.
So when we say day, we're sort of marking time.
Exactly. What is day? What is night?
In a place where there is no sun
where nothing never rises or sets.
But this is a day that is very momentous to us,
to put it lightly.
May I?
Hi.
Hi.
Are you asking if you could touch my hair?
Your face, your bones.
I mean, I'm just gonna do it.
Seems weird to even ask permission.
And he comes in with a finger and it's the same finger wet-willing you.
You know, what's a little wet-wling between bros?
It's what proves do.
It's so different with flesh on it.
But he just like holds up her hand.
And this is not a sensation that you have not been,
you're familiar with this and it actually seems, uh-oh.
Oh.
You know, you're a disincarnate.
carnate, ectoplasmic entity for so long that you forget what it's like to hold something that's really material.
Something that actually has some weight and some density.
Something that can actually exert its material will out into the world.
Oh, it's like feeling for the first time.
Seeing you, it's like every day of my life I've been walking out into the world without putting on my clothes.
It feels like I've just been missing something and you're that.
I hope this doesn't sound too forward.
No, please.
I want to be inside you.
I would argue I should probably be inside of you.
And herein lies the conundrum, right?
Yes.
Where does consciousness end, the material reality start?
What is the will and what is the material?
You're dwelling in an etheric plane.
There are planes of elements, and it all spirals off into an infinite regress.
Philverill Ferrell!
Philverill!
I think I know what you're saying.
I think this being so important that is not the time
to lose our way.
We do have.
There's winking.
What?
There was a wink.
We have been preparing for something like this,
as you know.
Of course.
And we would like to celebrate, first of all.
Also, this dwarf, she's told us that you have been inside her.
And she looks at you and goes,
It's me, girl! It's me!
Girl! I know, girl!
Dude!
I know! You look amazing!
I know! Oh my god, do a spin.
Ooh!
But I had to, I crafted my own circlet because you know, that thing is all over the place, but...
Check me out!
Dude!
It's hard to keep memories the same, but I'm Ministora!
Menistora!
Oh my God!
I am the champion of Taw, Sovereign of Valor.
I gathered from your laurel.
your Laurel. Thanks for noticing, I guess. But I mean, this is where I belong. This is where I go to when I'm not around you. This is, this is my home. No way. Mr. Do you want me to, like, call you that when we're like...
Instead of Ronnie? Um, I don't know. It's hard to remember when I'm on the material plane. Like, I feel like I'm two different people. I mean, Phil Varel, do you, do you forget things sometimes? It's hard to hold on to things. It's funny, you know, memory is sort of everything here. Yeah, it's hard to know what, uh, what you remember and what you're inventing.
But, you know, what's the difference?
Do we generate our memories,
or is the mind just a receptacle of the things that your sense is taking in?
Well, anyway, I'm so excited that you are here.
We've been listening to this for...
We're on manners.
Have a seat.
He grabs some etheric goo out of the air.
It just like suddenly makes like this enormous, like,
throne-like chair that's all like elk antlers and stuff.
So, I mean, if you're here and you're in one piece,
this has to be good news, right?
Yeah.
If you're in one piece,
And we're a one piece, then we're one piece.
We're one piece.
All together, one piece.
We, I wonder if we can reunite if that,
that would, that would be, I do.
You know, that is an interesting, you know,
I can't suggest it, it wasn't my idea.
The way you said it, but-
The way you're talking instantly makes me suspicious,
I do have to say.
Oh, we might seem a bit off-putting,
but let that not scare you.
We are only excited.
You seem super excited.
And we are under some rules.
We just are.
Yeah.
My nature of the.
What kind of rules?
There are rules that like we can't really talk about,
but let's just say, we're trapped.
Yeah.
Gosh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
The kind of long story short, we're confined.
It's our life is at present.
We don't want to say too much, but help.
But the good.
Good news is whatever our unfinished business is,
now that you're here and it's your unlife,
it's your unfinished business too.
And there's gonna be no way for you to leave
without helping us solve the unfinished business.
That's right.
And I love the idea of helpers
with good skulls on their shoulders.
Hmm.
Hmm.
Okay, can we just have a sidebar?
We're like, come on, we're just gonna finish.
You do you, you.
So, do you think that's actually us?
It seems like really convenient.
I want to trust ourselves.
This is the answers we've sought for so long.
Maybe freeing them from this hell-like prison
in which they're trapped also doesn't mean
that we have to then become prisoners ourselves.
They're hitting really hard on the like,
if you don't help us, you can't leave thing,
or is like just me?
No, they're hitting it hard, but I think
that we should probably explore it.
At least like help them out.
And we're gonna sidebar too.
Side by, side by, side by, side.
Well, it seems as though we're freaking them out.
Yeah, I think maybe we're coming on a little too strong.
I am showing my true self and honestly,
I'm feeling a little attacked.
I, yes.
I feel a little judge.
The expressions that they're making
without skin is harrowing.
It's like an aggression, but it's a small aggression.
There's probably a better way of saying that.
Yeah, like an eddibety.
It's a little, a tiny little aggressive act.
Yeah.
But I think there's a way that we can mitigate this.
Right, well, you just gotta remember
what it was like to be alive when you had,
When you just had things.
And your charisma came easy.
I remember, I mean, I was, I sang, you know, I did sing.
Focus features in Blumhouse present, obsession.
When I have a crush on a guy, no one knows.
Be careful.
I wish Nicky loved me more than anyone in the entire world.
6% fresh on rotten tomatoes.
I love you so, so, so, so much.
It's blood-soaked nightmare fuel.
What kind of supposed to put on her?
You have been warned.
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Hey, you got the pipes of a nightingale.
Why don't you, why don't you give you a little serenane?
And anything.
Nothing's gonna win someone to your side
than singing full voice out of nowhere.
You did, correct.
It didn't go without notice that, you know, we're different.
But essentially we are the same,
and I just want to emphasize that I basically worship you.
Yeah.
Huh?
I think you're amazing.
What?
You are my number one, my guy.
Oh man.
Giant finger.
I-
Oh, wow.
Oh, wow.
I didn't know fingers could get that big.
It's so big.
It's got like a word on it.
Look, Phil Varel, right?
That was our name, I suppose.
That's right.
I gotta ask.
You're not some kind of ethereal demon
who's taking advantage of a sweet little skeleton
who's maybe desperate to find answers about his past,
and is now perhaps manifesting them from a part of his subconscious
that he didn't really know was even active
or could produce such things.
You're not pulling a fast one, are you?
Look, this is basically one of our FAQs.
We, uh, I ain't no demon, all right?
Okay.
Yeah, we resented a little that you said that.
Oh, I would hope that if you saw a pair of skeletons,
claiming to be you, that you would treat it
with the appropriate amount of scrutiny.
Do you know how hard it is to find people in this realm?
No.
It is insanely.
You have to know and think and...
Very difficult.
Really difficult.
We were drawn to your imaginings.
Oh.
I mean, there are millions, billions of beings here.
The fact that you're only seeing us and I guess, Minasora, that should be all you need to know.
We're not here to take advantage of you.
No.
We just want to help you.
You help us.
We help you.
And I wasn't lying, the fact that you now know what our unfinished businesses or that even
we have some, it's all merged together now and you won't be able to leave this plane without
getting the unfinished business finished.
Oh, I see.
So there's always a clause.
There's always a clause.
Like we said, there's rules.
You know what?
You did say there were rules.
That was one of the very first things that you folks said.
I should have written that down in my spellbook.
And Minasora goes, they're telling the truth.
Like if you now know that they've got unfinished business,
you actually can't leave.
But this place is built on memories,
and I think their unfinished business is about their memories.
That's right.
We've been languishing for so long.
How long we know not,
because we've got to know our memories.
The more we know about what came before,
the more we know about the memories
that attach us to the world of material.
We play in our memories almost all day long.
and we remember many things,
and there's one memory that we just can't get.
It is literally elusive.
Can I wager a guess as to what that might be?
You can try. We've tried.
We've guessed what that memory could be.
Oh, yes.
Is it perhaps how you died?
Yeah.
Everything's possible here.
It's an infinite conundrum.
And is this some sort of memory palace behind you?
It is.
Of a sort, this whole...
This whole place is a kind of memory palace.
But there are memories at large and loose around here.
Just hanging out.
So we gotta find some of these loose mems
and see if... should we go into the palace first?
And Minnesota goes,
Honestly, I was just waiting for you to ask.
I really want to show you what's in the palace
because there's just stuff you don't know about me.
I was so amazing.
I was an awesome creature of Sundaros.
I like super-careous.
Super cannot wait. I want to know all your business girl. Okay there's there's like there's really good tea.
Let's go I want to go you let's go tea. Yeah, let's let's go tea and just rule of perception check. Oh no.
Just yeah you too okay. Okay, nope that is a 11thetical fail. Oh no.
So I've got a great yeah and a
Your present gets in your eyes.
You are a therese.
Stepping an ectoplasmic rake.
Oh no.
You see Phil Varel and Brignyus,
and they just happily follow behind you
as Minasaur leads the way into this sanctum of sorts,
almost like a temple.
It's built like a temple.
And as you enter, you see along the wall,
every square foot that's not covered in shelves
is a mirror.
The mirrors just reflect the fog around it.
It doesn't really reflect what's inside the sanctum.
And on the shelves built of both,
wood and plaster are spheres with different metallic light shining from them.
Silver, bronze, orange, gold, more yellow gold, more rose gold, that kind of thing.
All these spheres sit very behaved on their shelves.
And of note is the structure of the place itself, which on the left seems to be of dwarven stone,
and on the right seems to be of an elven making.
And you can easily figure out that one side is fibs and one side is busy's memories.
There is one sphere misbehaving at the top, floating around really quickly and defying the laws of physics,
moving one direction and then another direction really quickly, but then kind of floating more like a bubble
and changing its pattern of how it's moving.
The ceiling is really, really high, about
40 feet high, and it is floating at the top there.
Ronnie takes you to a central location
where there is a basin, and she very easily
teleports a sphere from busy side of the wall
and puts it into the basin.
And the sphere doesn't break or anything.
She just says, hey, to touch it,
and you'll see what I'm about.
All right.
Busy reaches out and touches the sphere.
You can too.
I'd love for you to know how awesome I am.
I accepted it at face value.
but I will touch it.
And as you touch it, your vision goes blank,
everything around you disappears,
and what you see is a flashback.
Oh.
You know that someone else's?
It's someone else's.
And it is not your flashback,
but you see Ministora, the dwarf.
She's bloody and she stumbles into this enormous black chamber,
so big that you can't see the edges or even the ceiling.
And the floor is wet, and she's still.
splashes toward a small mound that seems to be in the center of this chamber.
The mound is above the water and she lays what she's been carrying down onto this mound.
It is a small human female child and a nightgown.
There is blood on the front of her nightgown and Ministora turns back the way she
canes and kneels with her shield facing that way.
And a tear drips from her eyes as she is just overcome with the futility of how one person
could try to save this girl who's obviously dying.
When all of a sudden, a shaft of light shines from the top of the tavern all the way down to where they are,
and the girl herself rises through the shaft and transforms into a young woman in a beautiful dress,
fully healed, and she looks down, and as she is raised into the sky, a circlet comes down,
and Ministora is lifted to meet the circlet as the circlet lands directly,
on top of Minasor's head.
She laughs as she understands that she has been chosen
as one of the champions of the Sundari.
And you are blasted out of the memory.
So that's how you became the avatar?
I saved a young girl who actually turned out
to be a demigod.
So.
That's so.
And you should have seen the armies.
I mean, it was a lot.
Yeah, but that was a turning point for the battle.
So when you have to like go back and hang out
in Eun Zug's lair because it gets like to Tai Tai,
are you going back into that room with the statue of the dwarf?
Yes, and there is something.
I look, I need to pick a bone with you.
That's all you can pick with it.
We didn't look, I am...
I loved it.
Yeah?
I loved when you did it.
Not so much tippy.
Absolutely not.
Have some respect for the dead.
Well, okay, but his breath and the way he did it,
it was unpractice, really, really aggressive.
It was so aggressive, right?
A lot of teeth.
Yeah.
Well, I mean, I'm all teeth, but...
I think it was just different because it was you.
Busy's like, her bones are blushing, if bones could blush.
She's like, nervously tucking her hair behind her not.
existing years.
Wow, I can't believe you just watched me do that.
I mean, I did consensually possess you, so.
Yeah, yeah.
Look, I, you're half the reason I stayed in Eun-ZUx-Layer.
Like, I mean, I know the circlet's there and that has a big draw, but I could stay in
the ethereal plane and be pretty happy.
It's just that, hey, you were always there.
Really?
Yeah.
Busy immediately, ethereally, most.
into a bone pile for a second.
Amazing.
Borghneus looks over at Ferala and goes,
I think there's a romance moment and I'm jealous
because I thought this was gonna be my day with Varygneus
and somehow it's turned into minasora's day with Varygnees.
Staling, stealing your thunder.
What is happening?
Yeah.
Well, you look happy.
Busy like starts like stacking her bones, like back on top of her bones.
her bones, and then you just see her skull, like, go up her, uh, go up, like, her spine and, like, cocked back
under her head. And you see Varignias kind of pull Ministora and goes, Ministora, us, us. And Ministora
goes, okay, like, I can't right now. Like, yeah, do what you're going to do. I'll,
I'll be here. Thank you. We care about our memories, right?
Okay, we totally care about our memories. Where are our memories? Probably on that, uh, stone-hewn side.
I see that one.
Over in the wooden section, I imagine.
Do you want to see some of our memories?
Yeah, what's that one that's kind of floating around up there?
That's the question, isn't it?
That's the elusive one I'm gathering.
It's literally.
It's literally elusive.
Try as you might.
And a little mage hand pops up to it.
It's like, put putt, put.
You can't seem to pluck the little fella down.
There's a whole bunch of memories here as well.
Yeah.
Let's, what's one of your favorites
that you would like us to look at?
Ooh, play one of the good ones.
Don't play a bad one for us.
Okay.
Unless you like it because it's a bad memory.
As all of us touch that memory,
we see Beringnius with a bunch of her siblings in arms
dressed the exact same way in robes that cover plate armor.
And you have your target surrounded.
Just as you are about to capture him,
you hear the order to kill him on site and you get territorial.
This was yours.
This was the name that you wrote down from the source.
It took you arguably too long to catch him and that is why you were made bereft of your
beard braid, but you get it in your head that you're going to be responsible for this target's
death and it's not going to be with the rest of your siblings in arms.
So you find your way ahead of the game.
You can get inside your target's head at this point very easily.
And you find a place in these tunnels where you can get him by yourself and you tell him to
escape.
You tell him all the moves that your team is about to make.
And the reason is that you're going to provide an honorable death and you're going to fulfill
your prophecy.
And as he runs away, you merge back with your group and they are unable to catch him.
And that is when you are snapped back into reality.
So instead of helping the group, we decided to let him go.
We had some doubts about our group, the fatekeepers.
And so we wanted to make sure that when we captured him,
we were doing the right thing.
It was on our terms, yeah.
Okay.
It was up to us to kill him.
It just couldn't happen at that moment.
Who is that guy?
You didn't see?
I saw a bit.
I remember seeing it.
Every time, it's like every time I see that,
it's like I see, I see, I see.
and I know and then the memory stops and I forget.
Every time I've remembered it, I know that there's a guy
and I know I have a complicated relationship
with my duty vis-a-vis this guy,
but I can never quite hold on to what this guy looks like.
Man, I thought you might.
Let's do one of you!
Yeah.
I mean, that seems only fair, right?
Tip for tat.
Yeah, do a little back and forthy.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Fibbs touches his neck where the green nose
necklace is on Phil Varel.
I'd love to maybe see the day of the picnic
or maybe what happened in the aftermath.
Let's see what my hazy memory guides me towards.
Grab an orb.
Yes, a beautiful orb.
A light pink.
Oh, this is private.
This is private.
This is private.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
I was very young.
A slate gray.
A slate gray or?
A little safer, a chrome.
You grab that memory and put it in the basin,
and there she is.
Right as you remember her, you are back in a flashback.
And Fibs, this is a repeat image from before,
just a little bit ahead of time.
And she is the love of your life.
This is an elven girl with copper skin, a wood elf.
you see her full face, everything about her.
Pointy ears, she has the same necklace on, and she's laughing.
This is before you ran away, and you just want to make things so perfect for her.
You have a spread, and it is a spread of food from the palace kitchens,
and you decide that she would just be more beautiful,
and the entire event would be perfect if you had colorful flowers.
You know that you are deep into the forest where it's almost Faye territory.
You feel like you're on the outskirts of it,
but as you start picking flowers, you get further and further away.
But you keep checking back and you're able to see her.
The last time you see her, you look back, and it is almost instant.
As a group of things that look like flying fireflies,
that essentially grow bigger and bigger
and get this salmony look to them,
womeny look to them, swirl almost like a tornado encapsulate her, and they're giggling,
this cackling giggle the entire time, many, many mouths laughing.
It sounds like hundreds, filling your ears. It's driving you mad. And when they back away
from her, you see that she has turned into what looks like a pile of grass and mold and dirt,
but almost, I mean, almost like big animal dung as well, just a pile.
You know it's her.
The eyes that form, actually, they're the last things that change.
They look at you and you can see her trying to yell,
but there's no more mouth on her either.
And the salmon lighted people,
they escort her away from you, almost pulling her
with her grassy and dirty limbs at this point.
It is terrifying to you.
The last thing you do remember is her name is Lila.
Lila.
And that is when you begin running.
And your snap back to reality.
Maybe not necessarily a good one.
No, that important though.
Yeah.
And with these new realizations dawning on you,
we are actually going to move to Ghost Tippy
in the ethereal realm.
You've been watching
The small female elf and the large mer man lay hands on you and attempt to resurrect you.
And in the meantime, you notice that there is a really shiny orb floating right to you.
Oh.
Tippy looks up at it as it just zips around.
Okay, I gotta think clearly.
My dead body all stabbed up missing in ear.
being resurrected, or shiny orb.
It is a yellow gold and it has glitter swirling throughout.
Oh, is that glitter?
Tipi follows the orb.
The orb guides you a little ways away,
and then it just stops right in front of you,
and it slowly drops from the sky,
and it moves slowly, slowly towards,
your face and then your chest.
Tipi sort of puts his hands out but moves his face away.
Like it's gonna give him like a big smooch
that he doesn't want.
As you put your hands out,
it moves right through your hands.
And it kisses your cheek.
No, yeah, no kizzi.
And as it makes contact with your skin,
you are fully in a flashback.
Fuck.
You...
Is this what y'all do?
It's okay, Ron.
It's okay.
It's okay.
Not judging.
Not judging.
Anyways, where we...
You...
You flash back to when you actually are a younger goblin and your dad full of bone piercings in his ears and his nose and his belly and his neck and his neck and your dad.
and his nipples, just this guy with so many teeth
and decorations and ink all over him.
He comes in and ha ha ha ha.
He smashes the little creature
that you've been working on, building him out of sticks
and plant fiber.
You notice all around your entire tent
is filling up with chance and laughter
and goblin buffoonery.
As all of your brothers and sisters and mom
are dumping bloody carcassies.
of animals that they've hunted and killed.
It stinks, it's got the smell of blood
and rage from the hunt,
and your dad gestures to you like,
come on, Tippy, ah!
And you actually start crying
because you can't tear your eyes away
from the little guy that you built.
You remember that you had somehow magically
imbued it with the ability to say,
I love you, Tippy, we are friends.
but no more
and you can't tell your father
that or your siblings
he gets everyone
and goes hey look at Tippy
did you enjoy
being a coward
and staying home while we hunted
build something useful for once
coward
a real goblin would build a gun
and everyone goes
coward and he goes coward
and everyone just starts laughing
coward
coward and they're
They start putting animal pelts that are still bloody on your head, like a hat and on your shoulders,
like robes, and they lift you up and just yell, coward, coward, goblin, coward, coward,
and you are flashed back to your reality now, which you are completely alone.
No one can see you, no one can hear you.
Yeah.
It would have been cool.
if he hadn't smashed it, Dad.
You know, it was
it was you I was making.
But he smashed it before I could show you.
And I did get a gun.
Like you said, I didn't make it.
I didn't know enough.
Maybe I should have gone on the hunt.
Maybe things would have been different, you know?
If I, if I was stronger, had more piercings,
got my nips pierced.
Got some tats.
But no.
That wasn't me.
I didn't do those things.
Now I'm dead.
I'm dead.
And no one's here.
No family.
No friends.
No skeletons.
Just me.
Why did that orb come?
I didn't want to remember those things.
Where's my body?
Tippy looks around to see what's around him now that this he's relived this trauma.
Yeah, you see that the cobblestones of the path, they're still there.
They're still tangible, the cobblestones that busy built.
Didn't lead you too far away.
You could easily think your way back to where your body is.
There is something in your corporeal body that twitches.
You no longer have your big mountainous pack because that was definitely left by.
but in a side pocket there's it seems like something I'm I there's not a good way to say
this something something something something's in your pocket it's hard and it
and it jiggles it actually moves in my in my real in your real body my real body
something's hard and twitching in my jiggly in my pocket what is that I move
towards it to investigate
You are not a poltergeist.
You can't quite get your hands on what's in the pocket.
Tippy sort of reaches out, but I'm assuming my,
I just pass through it.
Your hand passes through it.
Why don't you roll a, let's see if you remember.
So this will be just a straight up intelligence check.
Let's go, all right.
That's gonna be 17.
Okay, you remember when you were alive,
you did put something in that pocket, a jar.
that contained something that once was alive,
but then it wasn't, you collected a piece of it.
Maxwell.
Oh my God.
Maxwell.
Can you hear me?
Are you there?
Tippy.
Maxwell?
What do I see? Does it, do I just hear Maxwell?
It twitches a little harder, the jar twitches a little harder?
Maxwell.
Tipy. Free yourself.
What?
made a big mistake and I got stabbed a lot.
What? Okay.
You know, I've always said this about gobbling.
Hang on, Maxwell, hang on.
They, what?
I'm just saying, a lot of time has passed.
Many goblins are like this.
It's not something that I say.
It's not good, Maxwell, to generalize.
Remember, we talked about this.
People get a little...
Well, it's not my fault that all goblins are pretty dumb.
Okay.
And they get killed so easily.
Okay.
Like goblins want to get killed.
Okay, don't loop us all together.
Maxwell, I've missed you.
All right, I missed you too.
And you actually see that he, with his tiny body,
like has come alive, able to unscrew the jar
and squeeze out of there.
And it's just the tiny lump, like nothing like
the ooze it was before.
Now, is Tiny Maxwell doing this in the real realm
or in the spiritual realm?
He's in the ethereal realm.
In the ethereal realm?
Yes.
And he's teeny tiny.
Yeah, and he's not,
square anymore. He looks like if a child went into a jello and took a fistful out of it
and yanked it out, many edges and just a lump. Maxwell. An old racist to latinus cute.
You're here.
It's a different time.
Oh. But if you're here, then you're dead, like me. That's right. You were viciously murdered. Like way worse than me, by the way.
Oh, no, I, I, they, they dragged me through my.
own trap system. Okay. Well did you say something weird to them before that happened or?
I just said gallantlings, uh, gallantlings all looked the same. Oh, Maxwell.
They do though. They do though. They do though. Maxwell, please. Oh, come on. You got a
two arms, two legs. Okay. Head on top. Maxwell, Maxwell, listen to me. Well, if you want to
find me, give me a good argument. I don't want to fight you. I've got an open mind.
You're a good person, Maxwell.
You're a good gelatinous cube.
But you know, you were born at a different time.
And things were communicated differently.
But I'm saying the time that we're in now,
say how is-
Okay, you're trying to educate me,
and I am the most willing to be educated.
I just want you to tell me how I'm wrong.
Okay, how do I put this?
I was asking you to debate this.
That's the worst.
I'm just saying there's a way to say things that maybe doesn't.
So say it.
I say Galatlings kind of all look the same and you say.
I say, oh, Galletlings share a lot of similarities that are, okay, there's no good way.
Yeah, we're saying the same thing.
We're saying the same thing.
You're right, Maxwell.
That's all I needed to hear.
That's cool.
It's good to see you, man.
It's good to see you too, Maxwell.
And I try to give Maxwell a hug, but realize.
it's not gonna work that way, so I just jiggle Maxwell's little head.
Okay, yeah, thanks.
So...
Maxwell, do you, I'm assuming you've spent some time here
since you've been dead for a minute.
Is there a way out?
And where does this road lead to?
Your pals from Eun-Zug's layer came and made that road.
Oh, busy and fibs.
They're probably off to another caper,
probably making a kegher into another rager somewhere.
I gotta catch up with them.
I don't know that they'll see you.
I see you. We're, you know, both dead.
So dead. And one of us morally, you know, more affixed.
More a fit?
One of us just, you know, on the right side of history.
Doesn't matter.
What matters is we gotta go find my friends, Maxwell.
You'll love them.
Well, you'll just, they're skeletons.
Okay, they're skeletons.
Okay, I have a thing with skeletons.
I don't hate them.
I don't have, I really,
like they can live their lives, but I just can't be around them, you know.
I'm sorry to say, but I had to borrow your hat.
I turned it into a hat of wizardry for my friend Phibs.
Oh.
Yeah.
Yeah, I could make cool stuff now.
So a skeleton's wearing my hat.
Yes, but that's good because your hat used to be a sign of not the right people,
but now the hat looks really cool.
I'm the first to say that times have changed.
They really have.
They really have.
But what the?
What the hell, Tippy?
Putting my hat on a skeleton.
You know, we're always in Eun-Zug's lair,
just doing what Eun-Zug wanted to do.
I've realized now that there's a bigger world out there
that I am not a part of anymore.
Because I'm dead.
Yeah, you're dead.
And I knew you die.
I knew you die kind of in a silly way.
It wasn't very silly.
Yeah, I bet it was, Tippy.
I bet it was just a...
I'm missing an ear.
Yeah, classic Tippy.
I can't wait to hear this story.
You probably like stepped on something wrong.
That didn't step on anything wrong.
I tried to save my friends, and it went very, very bad.
Well yeah, that was always gonna go bad for you.
You being a savior, I cannot imagine.
Maxwell, why did you wanna be friends with me?
You were a laugh.
But were you laughing with me or at me?
I mean, you would do silly dance
and stuff and then I was laughing at you.
So, you're laughing at me.
You kept visiting me.
I have to stay in my little station,
but yeah, you kept visiting me
and you'd do stuff,
and then you'd tell me about this stuff you would do,
and we'd have a good laugh about it.
I would do cartwheels.
Yeah, you'd do cartwheels.
You stored pretty much trash inside me.
That was pretty funny.
And you made weird comments
about how skeletons smell.
Uh, yeah.
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Maxwell.
If we're gonna be friends,
we can't be doing any more things
that hurt other people's feelings.
Because I've realized now that when I was a baby goblin,
I had my feelings hurt.
Hold on.
Are you not a baby goblin right now?
Maxwell, you know I'm not a baby.
We've had these talks,
and you know that's my biggest insecurity.
Maxwell...
I know, I'm just kidding.
Sorry, sorry, yeah, you're, oh no, dear old.
And you're one to talk, you're literally a baby gelatinous cube right now.
Good one, Tiffy!
That's right out!
I'm a little chunk now.
I'm just a chunk.
I'm still dead.
Okay, but you were saying we're gonna be nice to people.
We have to be nice to people, and we have to,
above all else, laugh with our friends, not at them.
And in order to laugh with our friends, we have to see.
save them, even though we're dead.
Hey, this is the most, like, anything I've done in over a week.
So yeah, great.
I'll give it a shot.
Wow, you're really changing.
That was, I didn't like you.
Well, let's see.
I want to start bounding ahead on the cobblestone road.
Okay, you do.
And Maxwell just like inches his way behind you.
And we're back to this sanctum, this memory house.
And you have just witnessed Philville.
Phil Varell's love of his life turned into a grassy heap.
Hey, are y'all, are you okay?
That seemed really rough.
It certainly wasn't pleasant, but I think that even bad memories have their place.
In this case, I wanted to know what happened because I had no recollection.
My heart was clearly in the right place, but I was not.
Oh no, painful memory makes you what you are, right?
It's only by knowing your memories
that you have a sense of yourself
and don't lose yourself
with nothing if not a collection of memories, yeah?
Yeah.
I guess another one?
We need to try and...
Get that one up there.
Ooh, we could do that too.
It does seem like it's been kind of driving you two up a wall.
Yeah, I really hate it.
I really hate that thing up there.
And we can't do it anymore.
It's made itself very clear.
It doesn't want anything to do with us.
It seems like it should be so simple.
Yeah.
All right.
Catch a ball.
Catch a ball.
Fibbs would like to, he adjusts his hat of wizardry
and kind of looks up at the orb and wants to see
if he can discern anything about it using his knowledge of Arcana.
Of course.
Make an Arcana check.
That's a natural one.
Damn.
That's an orb, all right.
That is an orb.
I've seen one before, which was right over there.
That is an old.
Yeah, so does that spark anything?
Can you think of anything?
Busy's gonna pop that head off.
So Busy pops up her skull.
Oh my god.
You're talking about yourself.
Pop that head off is you.
Pops her head off and just tosses it up
to see if she can hit it with her face.
At the same time,
Phibbs is going to cast his own skeletal mage hand
to try and catch where Busy is going to knock the orb.
Oh, okay, a little billiards here.
Yes.
I love it.
So will you make your skull attack?
Skull attack.
Okay, that is a 10.
Yeah, a 10 will hit.
A 10 hits?
Yeah.
And that was a 2D6.
So that is a 4 in the first roll and a 2 on the second.
Okay, awesome.
It is intact and it does not
it can knock itself right into your mage hand easily.
And as it knocks it into your mage hand,
it actually turns into an enormous elephant
that plummets to the ground,
and this ethereal elephant just crashes to the ground.
Everyone make a dexterity saving throw.
What'd you get?
19.
Hell yeah.
But nine.
18.
Okay, yeah, you take two legending damage.
I disbelieve because your mage
of clouds.
Ah, interesting.
Okay, you take two psychic damage.
This is worse somehow.
Yeah.
You're trying to cast I call bull-h-h-hsha.
I love it.
Once again, mocking us with a brutal irony
to attack us with something that never forgets.
And you can't, you can't.
Rasp it.
The hard of you work, the more it slips away.
It's like with every other orb, we can wrap
our hands around it and this one it's like it's like it wants to be caught and then and then
doesn't like I just don't understand it does hurt my brain though it wants to be caught but won't
let you catch it no no absolutely not oh what is that I'm thinking of other things that like
they don't want you to catch it but they do want you to catch it can I tell if it's enjoying
the pursuit like does it
Think of this as like a game?
Yeah, I mean, here we are on the ethereal
playing roll in sight check.
See, this is the outside of the cube thinking
that we've been reading.
I never thought about its emotions.
It's like 21.
A 21, that it's enjoying the pursuit.
Read that sphere.
Read it.
You get the sense it is in a survival situation.
It's afraid.
It is doing what it knows to do to survive.
And what it knows to do to survive is to run away.
Well, this is clearly some kind of memory that if unlocked could lead to something painful, perhaps.
Yeah.
I mean, a painful memory, you don't go looking for them.
They just come at you out of nowhere when you least expect it.
Yeah.
At that moment, you see your little goblin ghost friend Tippy approach and enter the chamber with you.
We can see it?
You can see him.
Go-go.
Can I see a baby?
Goblin.
Yeah, and you can also see doubles of your friends in the bones and then...
Whoa.
Guys, is this real?
Or did I die again somehow on the way?
Hi, guys.
This is Maxwell.
Say hi to Maxwell.
Maxwell say hi.
And remember what we talked about.
What a good hat.
Oh, thank you.
See, this guy's a blast, right?
Oh, how cool, Phil Varell.
Well, it looks like they have more friends.
Wow.
Wait, why do I feel like growing by the minute?
This is you, but with flesh.
It's actually not flesh in the traditional sense.
This is Phil Varel.
We are each other in various stages of our journey.
Is he and he or we?
We are all together.
Did you check if they were some sort of ethereal demon
trying to play a trick on you?
You know.
Ah.
This is why it's the effacious.
Maxwell goes, oh, and I'm the one who's a problem.
I'd just say, you know, you can't just...
You just make assumptions about people
and give me a lecture about it.
Okay, you know what? Maxwell has a point.
We're all trying to turn a new ooze around here.
It's just, Minnistoria goes, ah, hey!
Who's that?
Yeah, you planted some goblin lips.
Right on my statue.
This is, Tippy turns beat red.
And it's...
You knew that day would come a reckoning.
I remember you said true love at the time.
Do I not get a say in this?
Well, you were my first kiss?
No shit.
Okay, yeah, pretty obvious.
Pretty obvious,
pretty obvious, huh?
Use are in.
Okay.
It was cool though, no teeth?
Look, I got what I wanted out of that experiment.
It's just, there have been other beings
that somehow come to Eun-Zug's example.
to look for true love by kissing the statue.
Okay, so I can explain that.
We have been telling people that they'll find true love.
No, I can do that, Matt?
I'm saying, can you not anymore?
Oh, not do that anymore.
You got it, yes, yes, can do.
Only thing about that is that I'm dead, so I can't really.
Well, that's probably for the best.
I don't know if it's for the best that he's dead.
That's why we're here.
Well, hang on.
I still don't understand what's going on.
Why are you guys hanging out with yourselves?
Oh my God, so it has been like a day.
So you super died.
We got swept into here by like, Hotmer Man,
we're trying to save your life, is the long and the short of it.
We all have unfinished business.
And so we've got to fix that
so that by the time you're fixed, we can get back home.
Oh my gosh, look what's happening.
And you all look, and the sanctum is growing
an additional arm somehow magically.
And instead of made out of Dwarvenstone and Elven Wood,
there's another section that's forming.
It's small at the moment, but it is made out
of swampy mossy material.
And it is like dirt pounded together to make walls.
And it is just squeezing in and forming
and getting bigger and bigger on one side of the sanctum.
Slowly but surely little metallic orbs
are filling shelves in that area.
Maxwell?
Are you doing this?
Maxwell.
No, I've got a memory sanctum.
It's not as big as this, but.
So you know about this place.
What is a memory sanctum?
It's a place where you can go to access memories
from your life.
So this is the Tippy Wing.
There's a Tippy wing?
I think there is now that you're here.
I would expect it to be made out of guns by that.
I guess it's made out of loss.
I look at it to see if there's anything discernible
about it that would really be obvious
that it is about Tippy.
He has man out of guns.
No.
Oh my God!
Oh my God!
Tippy's head explodes and he died.
No, yeah, you can see little gears and gadgets
and tie rods and
car parts and I'm just saying stuff now,
but little metallic doodads are interconnected
among the mirrors and the shelves.
Wow, that one's mine for sure,
because look how well engineered it is.
Goblin engineering right there.
Yeah. So what are you guys doing here?
Just hanging out in the memory sanctum, huh?
Why do they seem so wound up?
Ah, you be here for an indeterminate amount of time
and tell me how you like it.
Yeah, I don't really like it here.
We got interrupted, didn't we?
We got interrupted by a goblin and a ooze,
but we were doing something.
We were finishing unfinished business, right?
That really matters to all of us.
What?
And nothing.
Can you think of a way we're trying to get this,
where's the orb now?
It's still floating up at the top of the room.
Okay, so it's not an elephant anymore,
it's back to being floaty.
Does it look like the orb that I encountered
outside of this memory?
It looks similar, but no, it's not the same.
I had a similar little thing.
Did you guys touch the orb?
Because there's definitely memories in there,
which makes sense because it's a memory sanctum.
We've touched a couple of our own, but this one is,
it's been described as elusive.
Three-word summary, what was your memory about
when you touched it?
Can't catch guy.
Can't catch guy.
Girlfriend Grass Now.
Oh.
Wait, more than three.
And I guess did you have the same member?
Because you're the same.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, we saw this whole three.
But if you had to pick three words.
Different words to describe the same memory?
Yeah.
Dirt pile girl.
That was actually the first draft I had in my head, but...
Yeah, that's cool.
All right.
I kind of just stood there, and it kind of just floated to me.
Have you guys just tried looking at it?
Put your arms out, maybe try and dodge a smooch, you know?
No?
I put my arms out, and I was like, oh, don't kiss me.
Don't kiss me.
I realize you're new to this corporate being business.
I am very new, yeah.
But we are entities of pure will.
You know what I mean?
Okay.
Like, we are that which animates the flesh.
Knock, knock, knock.
Oh, it's weird.
So the will is kind of all we got.
What are you saying?
We just sit around our hands
and wait for this thing to come out of the sky.
Yeah, have you tried it?
Well, we're not insane, so no.
Well, try it.
See what happens.
What do we got to lose?
Yeah, I'll just sit here and be like,
I don't even want you to touch me.
Yeah, please don't touch us.
Yes, don't come down, orb.
Don't come down here, we'll hate it.
Yeah, freaking busted orb.
Okay, if anything happened.
Yeah, as you were ignoring it,
it did kind of float down.
And then at Phil Varel's busted comment,
it flights right back up.
Too harsh.
You scared it.
Yeah, I guess I don't want it either.
So if I don't want it, I actually, what I do want,
I want to, I just want to be around you guys.
You're giving me like a whole new hope
that life could be something.
I feel the same way around you guys.
That'd be weird.
I wouldn't kiss you, but like if I could, maybe I would,
but not in a polykeal kind of way.
Oh, like a frenzy smooch.
Yeah.
And this conversation continues,
the orb does slowly, slowly move even further.
I'm just so happy to see it.
I'm happy to see you guys. Honestly, I thought I'd never see anyone ever again.
We wouldn't, we didn't think we were gonna see you again. That was so wild. I hate that this is working.
Can I just tell you guys something? Yeah. Not to be weird, but I think you guys are my best friends.
You two skin people. All we had to do is have a treacle-y talk about the power of friendship.
The orb does. It moves directly all the way down into the basin.
and just starts thrumming with energy.
Oh, oh, oh, this is big.
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
Why?
I don't even want to touch it since I'm here
with my best friends.
I've learned the true value
of relationships and how it is love.
It is love, in fact, that is the greatest treasure of all.
You gotta meet it.
And I guess the thing we've been missing was
The goblin?
Tippy reaches into the etherealness
the way he made his little dolls in the beginning.
And he makes a new doll.
And it's a doll that looks like a goblin,
but has two little skeleton people on each shoulder.
And like, on their shoulder, two little flesh versions of those.
Whoa!
A little Russian doll.
And then I wind it up and it goes,
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
And I hold it up to the orb.
Oh, and yeah, the orb actually gets bigger
and bigger in the basin.
Guys, say it with me.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I'm gonna reach my hand, I'll just touch you.
I love you.
I love you.
And we are blasted into a flashback.
Yeah, yeah, nailed it.
And in this flashback, you see very clearly,
Brignius at the source where she was given a name to write down,
and you see the name that she writes down,
and it is Phil Varel Dusk Branch.
You see another meeting where the entire fatekeepers say,
Phil Verl Dusk Branch must die.
He will cause the death of too many people if he stays alive.
and you see the fate keepers agree.
Then you see Barignius chasing Phil Varel
and Phil Varel eluding her.
You see Phil Varel grabbing artifact after artifact
from different tombs and temples and other dungeons
with Barignius flat on his heels.
You also see calm nights,
this goes on for 50, 60 years,
calm nights with Berigneus setting up camp for the night
and singing herself to sleep.
with Phil Varel watching her.
You see a friendship develop
in this conflict of cat and mouse
that they're playing.
And you see a reluctance for Phil Varel to be caught
and you see a reluctance for Berygneus to catch.
And then finally, you see the memory
that we just saw Berygneus,
where she warned Phil Varel to escape
before the fakekeepers could catch him.
And finally, in this memory,
you see Berygneus and Phil Varell
together in one corner of a dungeon.
And Phil Varel has an artifact in hand.
It is a chalice with two wings on it.
And Berygneus approaches and says,
there's nowhere for you to run now.
Come on, you couldn't see you way clear
to just let me escape one more time.
We both know this game has gone on for way too long.
Look, and you see that she's lost a braid from her beard.
I'm getting demoted here.
This is getting dangerous for both of us.
You don't have to tell me how dangerous things are getting.
I saw the love of my life turned into a mound of sod and earth in front of my eyes.
Well, that's why you're on these adventures, isn't it?
Because you can't face up to your feelings.
I'm doing my duty.
Oh, you're giving presents to the Sundari.
How nice.
I'm doing my duty.
You know what they say about you, Phil Varel, Duskbranch?
You'll bring about the ruin of many.
I'm serving something greater than myself.
And so am I.
Just because your friends can't understand that,
it's not my job to educate you.
You'll learn in time how important our work is.
You know I let you through my fingers. I let that happen.
I could have taken you out a hundred times.
Why didn't you?
Didn't seem like the honorable thing to do.
So what do you think?
Is it time to do the honorable thing?
He sets down the chalice and stands ready to finally face this person that has been dogging his heels for so long.
I am ready and she immediately puts a dagger right at your throat.
This is how you want to go, not running, just standing.
This is who you should have been for Lila. Yes, I did learn her name.
I know everything about you.
You should have been there.
Cross his own weapon.
You don't never get to tell me where I need to be
and who I need to be with.
If you're such a slave to duty,
let's see how well you do.
And they begin fighting,
and the swords and the daggers just slash each other.
Tears are streaming from their eyes
as memories of what they could be and what they have lost.
For the last 60 years, just enveloped their entire fight.
sweat and tears, a ripped fabric,
everything they're giving their all to this fight.
Finally, they realize they're still not trying to kill each other,
even in this moment.
And Brignus breaks off and says, I can't do it, I can't do it,
I don't know.
Without you, do you know what I am?
A mother, a wife.
If I don't have the fate keepers, I'm nothing.
I don't want to kill you.
But if I don't, I die.
Are you bigger than every role that you're
society and culture has forced you to play,
then do something.
Do something for yourself, for once.
I tried and I failed, as you never failed to remind me.
I don't think you have any idea what I lost.
Go ahead, do it.
He opens up his shirt.
You'd be doing me a favor.
You know what?
I've made no decisions for my life.
I've followed everyone's rules.
I obeyed everything, and I got this far, this far.
There's a cap on that.
I'm gonna do only what I truly think is the best
for the world.
I hope you know that I have valued our time together.
And she runs a sword into your heart.
And he not even trying to parry,
goes forward and does the exact same thing.
And they fall together, eyes locked,
in this corner of a dungeon.
the chalice clanking to the ground.
And you are ripped back into reality.
Okay, Maxwell, I feel like we shouldn't have been there.
So let's just let them hash this out.
We'll just be passive in this conversation.
Oh.
Now a bunch of things are starting to miss.
I'm scared.
I'm scared.
Oh.
I'm scared.
I don't know. Does that mean something?
Yeah.
Maybe our unfinished business is finished.
So we could leave.
Yeah.
It's just like the orb.
We had the power to leave maybe this whole time.
We had the power to leave the first time.
Oh, but except that power was ripped away from us
because two of us can't be on the material plane at the same time.
That would create some sort of paradox.
create some sort of paradox.
That means that one of us has to die.
Oh boy, I asked you guys if they were demons.
And we never said we were, and we aren't.
And we aren't.
Were you?
But unfortunately, to coin a phrase,
that can be only one.
Thanks for the memories.
The Air Squader experiences, the utmost betrayal of selves.
That is where we will end this episode.
Tune in next time to find out what happens
to which busy and which fibs.
Thanks so much.
I actually love that, you know,
just letting me get away with this.
It's amazing.
Enjoy more ways to save at Ralph's
like low prices in every aisle.
And when you download the Ralph's app,
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Plus, you can earn fuel points
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At Ralph's, you can enjoy more ways to save
and more rewards every time you shop.
So it's always easy to save,
big every day with savings and rewards. Ralph's SoCal for over 150 years. Savings may vary by state.
Fuel restrictions apply. See site for details. The war is over and both sides lost. Kingdoms were
reduced to cinders and armies scattered like bones in the dust. Now the survivors claw to what's left
of a broken world praying the darkness chooses someone else tonight. But in the shadow dark, the darkness
always wins.
This is old school adventuring
at its most cruel.
Your torch ticks down in real time
and when that flame dies
something else rises to finish the job.
This is a brutal rules light nightmare
with a story that emerges organically
based on the decisions that the characters make.
This is what it felt like to play RPGs in the 80s
and man, it is so good to be back.
Join the Glass Cannon podcast
as we plunge into the shadow dark
every Thursday night at 8 p.m. Eastern
on YouTube.com slash the Glasscanon
with the podcast version dropping the next day.
See what everybody's talking about
and join us in the dark.
Ever open up your podcast app,
scroll forever, and still not know what to listen to.
And there are millions of podcasts
and most of them, they just don't grab you.
That's why I created something you should know.
Every episode is built around surprising,
useful, and fascinating ideas.
We're consistently ranked in Apple's top 200.
with thousands of five-star reviews.
But more importantly, people come back
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If you're tired of searching
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try one episode of Something You Should Know
right here on the platform you're listening on right now.
