Critical Role & Sagas of Sundry - Vox Machina Ep. 1 - Arrival at Kraghammer

Episode Date: November 20, 2021

Our story begins as Vox Machina, the heroes of Emon, arrive at the cavernous underground city of Kraghammer. After wiping out a grave threat to Emon’s emperor, Sovereign Uriel Tal'Dorei III, the band of adventurers has been sent on a journey by the Arcanist, Allura Vysoren, to find Lady Kima of Vord, a Halfling Paladin of Bahamut, who was drawn to Kraghammer upon learning of a great evil resting beneath it... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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And what this basically is is a continuation of our weekly D&D game, me and a bunch of other likely nerdy and enjoyable voice actors, gathering around, rolling some dice, killing some creatures, having some adventure. And now we have the pleasure of bringing it on the stream for you to watch, enjoy, and occasionally interact with. Foof, all right, so last we left off, just to give you guys a little backstory, the party had completed a large venture in saving the nearby city of Yman, one of the central capitals of this human civilization of Taldori. They managed to halt a demonic insurrection within the throne,

and as such were greeted to a hero's celebration and had a keep built on their honor. Over the six-month period of the keep being constructed, they went about their own ways and then returned to see its final creation. However, they did not have a chance to really enjoy it immediately as one of their good friends and allies, Archonist Alora Vizorin of the Tal'Dori Council, came to them requesting the aide, saying that a longtime friend of hers,

Lady Kima of Orr, who is a very well-known and very well-respected half-ling paladin of Bahamut, the Platinum Dragon, had been gone on pilgrimage for a while, essentially a vision quest that is part of her own development as a paladin. As part of this, she let the information go to Allura that a dark vision had come to her, saying that some sort of evil route was beginning to breed beneath Craghammer in the mountains within, Craghammer of which is the nearby Dwarven civilization

that you have previously not been allowed entry to, because the dwarfs weren't fans of nobody without any political means of entry. Right. However, she managed to acquire the necessary documentation, offered you a very substantial reward should you find the whereabouts of Lady Kima aboard and hopefully bring her back safely.

You left on the pathway to the Dwarven citadel of Craghammer. You were ambushed by a group of roaming barbarian Goliaths of which, partway through the battle, Grog managed to recognize one of them as a previous ally and no longer ally at this time. Oh, bitch. Yep, the barbarian for this first and only time so far managed to avert battle through a social encounter

and rolled pretty damn well on a persuasion check. So you got one, you get one. You got your one, never again. Next time he dies. Yeah, essentially. But you managed to not turn it into complete bloodshed, and you continued on your way to Kraghammer, We're sent it to paperwork. We're given entry into the city, and that is where we begin this adventure.

In the city of Craghammer. The city of Craghammer. Wow, that's fantastic. We're in. Yes. You were at the door. We were talking to something, right? Yeah, you would talk to the front guards at the gate of Craghammer. They had begrudgingly let you inside, giving you a couple of pointers and a couple of frauds, and sent you into the city proper. You made your way through the darkened alleyways and stone-carved tunnel that leads to the main central portion of the city proper.

An enormous, undergrammatropolis that sprawls out before. that sprawls out before you, the dark earth and shadows, framing beautiful stonework, marble collins, archways and labyrinthine bridges climbing across the vertical city'scape, all warmed with the red glow of some strange crimson rock peppered throughout the town as a light source. A large metal forge envelops the center of the cylindrical city. And the entire city is a three-tiered cylindrical city

that is built into the ground of the mountain itself. Welcome to Craghammer. Remind us, did we both Should we have papers to get in? Allura got you paperwork. So you were able to actually get in this time. But actually speaks Storavish. Pike speaks.

Pike speaks. And she's not here. I speak dwarish as well. Oh, good. Did you? I do. Oh, that's good. Fantastic.

The only bit of information you have about the warehouse of her is that she came here to go into the mine, apparently a mithral mine, where this evil is supposedly brewing. You heard that the, the, The one person who owns the biggest part of the Mithwell Market here, kind of cornering it, the name was the Dwarven Lord Nostok Grey Spine. That was the only name that you had in regards

to this deep earth quarry. Gray spine? Gray Spine. Gray Spine. I have to go find him, don't we? I think before we do anything, we should find a place to sleep. Oh, we're all jacked up from before, right? Well, wouldn't it be nice just to put everything down for a little while?

Of course. I've got a lot of... that I need to stow. I want to hear about what you... Good way to phrase that, Scanman. Also, I would like to check out any kind of places where they might have enchanted labors

or whatnot. Do you alls have enchanted labs? Can you stick with us? You're the only one who speaks dwarfish. You're getting ahead of your stoke. Stick with us. I'm just think, put it on the list. Are there any dwarves in the vicinity?

Oh, there are many. And they, as you finish this conversation, look it out. There are two guards posted nearby wearing kind of dark, dark crimson and brass chest plates that have a uniform scar carved across the front. It's actually built into the armor itself as a design, and they're both just staring awkwardly at all of you arguing in the middle of this entry throwfare at Crackhammer. Tiberius, make with the dwarf talk, please.

Hello, lads. My associates and I were looking for a place of lodging for the night and all have you. A place is a reputable reputation. One dwarf kind of shouts over to the one, says, You're here about, Hebson? I'm looking for a place to stay. I heard that right. It's about time we have some new folk in town.

Well, if you're looking for a place to stay, so your best bet would be the pig pits. The name of a place? Yeah, certainly, the pig pits. All right. As for the pig pits, don't we shone around? That's where you're sleeping for the night. I know, I feel like we're being hazed.

But no, no, not at all. This is all in common. This is all in common. This is all in Compton. Okay. Okay. Oh, see, you're doing it. Which way to the pig pits?

The pig pits are that way. It points over the edge and you see down past the central forge structure in the city. The very, very bottom, nearby looks like a large temple that envelops the larger, or the bottom floor of Craghammer proper. There is indeed a distant slop of mud, and internal livestock are being kept for food reasons. Give them some shiny. I bring out a piece of gold. Yeah. Gold.

Please, sir. We're looking for a place to stay that isn't covered in the mud. Oh, and it's good to see that at least one of you speaks to Orvish. Takes the coin, King sitting in his teeth, and goes, all right, now if you're looking for a proper place to stay, you're going to look for the Iron Earth Tavern. That is just to your left about that way. No more than a half a mile. Keep an eye out. Listen for the laughter and the people who are very, very drunk. That's your best bet. Thank you, sir.

No worries. And I like your armour, by the way. Well, thank you kindly. A little wink. It was. I think that's all she does. All right. What I do is winky people.

It's a nervous tick, really? Yeah, it's a feet. You progress to the western side of the Cragondhammer rotation as you kind of curl around the central platform, making way eventually to the outside of this rather large central tavern inn. As you walk up, you can hear music playing. You can hear laughter and boastful cheer. You can hear some arguments in the distance. You can hear it from good,

two, three buildings away. This is definitely a central social environment here in Craghammer. As you walk inside, you get some proper tavern music here for you. Oh. Smells in here. Indeed, too. Some roush, some loud boisterous drinks being clinging together. As you walk in, the first thing that catches you is the scent of stale alcohol and

sounds like smoked wood of some kind. Yes! There are tables, most of them in the same. decent condition, but some of them half broken and repaired, probably for some previous encounter in the bar. In the center of the room, there looks to be not currently in use, specifically built brawling circle. It's about maybe about 30 feet by 20 feet. It's more an oval, and it's not in use currently. An octagon? Essentially.

How high is the ceiling? Can grot? The ceiling actually is considered vaulted ceilings for dwarves, so it runs in about it. about seven feet. For Gras, it's an uncomfortable, like, almost scratching your head across the top. Beach. And as you enter, about seven or eight of the nearby dwarves at the front door, go, just look immediately at the rag-tag non-dwarven group that just kind of stumbled into the center of the tavern. What are you looking at? It's not very often we catch someone with that kind of a mug on you. Let me drink. Come sit down.

My kind of people, see you later. I go down the drink. We grab a table next to the dwarves with rug. All right, both tables next to the table they're at are completely filled dwarves. All right, I take a sack of gold in my own pocket and slend down the table. A sack of gold, are you crazy?

Gentlemen, gentlemen, the ladies. Ladies and gentlemen, we are traveling from far away. We've just arrived from Iman. We are fascinated to see your underground city. And to celebrate the occasion, I would I like to buy every dwarf in here around. Bartender. The music stops.

The conversation stops. All dwarven eyes turned to the table, and they all turn to a single Dwarven woman at the back who's behind one of the bars who was a towel over one arm and she's kind of friendly looking around. She's staring confused at you and all eyes are on her and she goes, I'm here and some generosity. Suddenly pay up front drinks around on this half oven gentlemen.

Lessing a raise. Make a raid. I won't. I would love you. I'll need your largest bowl of ale for this one here. Ask cash. Yes, please. No worries.

Aydra's got your back. Happy night back. And she wanders off to the back room. Comes back and starts pouring just Stein after Stein after Stein of ale, like the big barrel was set up on top. You do notice that she is definitely the head of this tavern and all of her bar keeps are male.

It seemed to be worked rather ragged. What was the name? Excuse me, Miss, you. Adra, yay! I'm sorry, what? Adra. You run a fantastic establishment. Thank you for welcoming us and allowing us to buy this round.

We really... Patrons that come on and drop coin like that are welcome any time. Well, thank you for your hospitality. Might we inquire about staying here the night? Do you have an inn with this tavern? She reaches below and pulls out of... Big Tomas are slimming through it. You know, actually, we have openings right now

in the second floor. Several rooms or just one? Do you need them side by side? That would be nice. I could probably muster that. Something with a little bed for me. Child, one of the dwarf barmaiders, can what's her?

Hey. Get Stinson out of his room, move him to the third floor. He's got open a block for her. New guests. Fine, fine, fine. And the older dwarf kind of stumbles his way up the stairs. kind of stumbles us away up the stairs, begrudgingly. All right, so if I can get a room for each of you

are looking at eight rooms separately, that will run you per evening about 25 gold pieces. Does that sound about me? Toll. 25 total. Oh, okay, okay. You want to share a room? Yeah, we can.

We'll bunk up. We can bunk up. Grog, you and me. You might just sleep on your feet. I don't know. Go on the women. 15 gold then for, you know, just that love. She visibly deflates a little bit, but it's like,

All right, fair enough, fair enough. Five rooms it is. With a 15 gold pudding. Is that how old are you expected to stay? Yes. How long can you expect to stay? Oh, I mean, it's a few days. Let's say it a week.

With an indefinite home, we are, we have business in the city. Right. Well, how about we pay the week in advance and I'll give you a discount? I love discounts. Well, wait, wait, wait. Just do it. I thought we were going to be.

I mean heading south, like... Let's say... 100's old for the week. All five rooms. Says you're gonna be a lot. We're just everything with you down into the next. We're pretty flush. I think we can handle it. That works.

This doesn't terrify me. I think I did the math wrong. That is... I was told there would be no matter. Sounds good. We'll take it. I hate not having a calculator. Do it.

Oh, my good. She pulls back and pulls some keys out, hands with the rest of you. I asked you, hand you some paperwork, that shows you about which rooms are yours, and says, great. They're welcome to stay all your life, ask questions, and I'm like that. Just make sure you don't do anything stupid

near the Carvers. Ooh, like what? I do things like that all the time. Sorry, I have dwarish, is a little thick, near the. The Carvers, the Carvers. The Carvers. The Carvers. The Carvers.

Is your first time in the Carver? Yes. Yes. The Carvers are the guard that were in this city, they're the ones who keep the law. The scar. Yes, the armor, the carvers. The carvers.

Oh, the carvers. At which point, she kind of leans back and, as he reveals the rather norald scar on your chest, she reels back a bit and soon near by the horse go, Hey! They start showing their scars and it's like, oh no, I got this one from a bad iron book. And then they started talking about different creatures they fought.

All right, well, just the carvers are a bit of a, sort of a, how do you do it? A military class in this city? They're on a very tight ship on the street, so just be a problem. That shouldn't be a problem. Thank you. Mostly we're just looking for a little gray spine, if I recall. We just have business with him.

You might have business with you if you've seen a halfling come through. She thinks to herself and says, no, there was, there was a halfling woman, but she was thinking the firebrook in the bottom floor for a couple weeks. In where? She was a, she got the few fights herself. Oh, the silver armour, that one. Yeah. She was in the firebrew and the fibre eye saw one.

Right on my alley. How long ago would you say this was? Oh, she went for a few weeks. I haven't seen it recently. Thank you. Perfect. Is there a champion of the circle of fighting in the town? Is there a raining... Already, grog! Well, I have to know these things.

She turns to touch something. She turns the barrel that she has on the table towards you a little bit. You can see the actual symbol, this kind of burned image on the side that says, This bogus brewery, she goes, that would be bulgous. The one who supplies us to what you're drinking. He's the unfreeed chap, but I don't think he's quite right to fight at the moment. And she points towards the very edge of the bar, and you see one older brisled dwarf, long gray hair pulled into straight braids in the back. Big bushy beard that's all shoved up into his face because he's asleep, drunk as a skunk on the edge of the bar.

My dog, dwarf. Maybe we'll use him as a murk later or something. Or another time, then. Another time. Save it for a rainy day. Is it rain? I don't think they have rainy day. Is it Grey Spine?

Yes. Yes, Gracebine. We're looking to set up a meeting. No stop. Nostop. Nostrock. Nostok. Nostok.

Graysen. It's definitely a business type one. Who's the friendlier grispine? Oh, friendly, the types would probably be the head of House Grey Spine. Wait, wait, how many Grey Spines are there? Oh, there's probably several at this point. I've lost track. The family line's been going for a while. However, the past Grey Spine, currently, Iron Keeper Gradam Grey Spine is the head of this entire city.

Voted in ten years ago, actually. He's there at the Council. Iron keeper, what? Iron keeper Gradding Grayspine. Gradim. Gladim. Gladim. This is commoner. Learn to speak the language. I understood.

Adra, may I ask, obviously we have no walls in our little party. Unfortunately for us. Sorry about that. You're very welcoming, and you appreciate that. How welcoming would you say the city is to outsiders? It's like to stick out like the sore thumb.

Probably. It's always you've gone through it to be stupid, I think. And as long as you keep the coin flowing, and as long as you stay to the upper levels, the lower levels, you get to more of the business, the miners, the forges, the foundries. That's when you get to the business area, it's regarded, it gets heavier, and that's where folks don't like your poking either of money. So the lower levels would have the mithromines. The mithromine, right. There's one. There is one now.

He's all been current, well, it has been for quite some time, completely helmed up and run by House Gracebine. The keystone quarry is what you're looking for. But we're not really interested in that. Of course not. I don't recommend it. Not with proper business credentials on that. You'll end up being questioned. It sounds like a dirty business in some way.

You're going to stay away from those miners, Scanlan. She gives you a look almost like it was slightly racist statement, but then kind of passes it off because you paid her a lot of coin today. So, racers. It's a little racist. Nostock? Nostock. Nostock, Grace, fine.

Yes. You said that he's kind of a... Oh, there's a reason he's the one put in charge of the mines and the business, is the foundries. Where is he lurking at this? Well, if he's not home, the actual grey spine manor. Oh, right. ...that contains old ones all over there.

He's probably down at the actual, at the, what is it, apparently down by the grey spine quarry itself, keeping the line of the business. in the business there. There's a nearby dwarf at this point kind of, a near, just having a few drinks goes, oh, great spy, there's been troubles around there. Apparently a friend of mine works there. Got a big nasty scar last week. Wouldn't even pay him for his time off, do you? This bullshit, slams his drink down on the table. Damn at the quarry. Hey. How did your friend get this nasty cut?

He works there. He said there was stints pouring out of the caves. Gobbling and they like. Goblins. Good ones or nothing. Of course not. It seems there's something that the Comptons is pulling out through. Just saying that business isn't for a serious problem. Does your friend that I have drinks here?

No, he's been sober for two years. I'm not friends anymore. Oh. I'm going to tug on his beard a little bit. I'm sorry. I think. What's a process. Of which point, Adro slaps his hand and says,

Can you hear that? He bought one round. It's not right. Excuse me, I'm interested in drinking water. One thing I draw the theory. Are there any mystics in this particular town that study in the arcane arts? Of course what you think towards is a baseline voice of brawl each other. I haven't.

I mean, I haven't met them. So many racist comments. Geez. What you're looking for is House Thunderbrands. They're the ones who, by blood, have the arcane arts in their family line. They run most of the enchantment process in the city. They also train. They call it train.

Some of us call it more induct. but they're definitely the focus of all of Keenhearts in here and cry for my. Thank you. So. Thank you for your time, Andrea. You just carry on with your evening. We'll seek you out if we have any more questions. Certainly.

Now, if you don't mind, she scoots you aside as you see a line, a queue of dwarves behind her that they're empty cups, like waiting to get to her to fill up the drinks that you bought. Oh, that's sweet, we did promise. All right. Enjoy, gentlemen. What time of day is it? Best that you can tell, insights, you can't. But you just arrived probably around three or four in the afternoon.

Do you're probably pushing sunset right about now? Do dwarves carry the same schedule? I don't know. Does anyone know? There's only one way to find out. Make an intelligence check. Oh, roll it. First time, two.

Nice! 18 plus, what is that? Investigation or insight? This would be just a straight intelligence roll in this one. It's just your general knowledge of dwarves. Oh, 20 then. That's not too bad. It's not too bad.

In your experience, you know dwarfs depending on their lifestyle what they do for a living. Their clocks can run differently, but for the most part, they run in tandem of most other races just because it makes it easier from dealing with outside forces. But like I said, it's very variable. There is no like set walk time of like this is morning, this is evening, they just kind of sleep when they need to and wake up when they need to. All right. Good to know.

It's like living in Alaska. Kind of. Should we go to the fire? Dwarven Alaska? I think, yes. Yes, fellows, what should we do? Showing out the fire again. No, Alaska.

That was where Lady Kimi was in. And also I think somebody should run reconnaissance on Grey Spine Manor. Yes, I don't think we should try to go directly to the mines and find Nostok. No, I agree. Maybe we should enlist the help of a dwarf here in the city to introduce us to Nostok. I mean, we're not trying to raise hell. raise hell or bring down a thousand orbs upon us. No, there's no sense attempting to be subtle.

Although that does sound fun. Everyone's gonna know that we're here and what we're looking for by morning. But I get old drunky gravy that's got his face down on the bar and do it. Well, let's ask him, maybe he's drunk enough to help us. Saddle up. Me?

People seem to like you here. You're the connoisseur. Maybe I'll part my armor. Go show him his scar, see what he does. Take him and drink. Take him and drink. Take him and drink. Oh, we'd like to.

get a very large drink. A very large, the largest goblet you have of ale. And I would like to go over to, what was his name, Bulbis? Bulgus. Volgis. Volgis. I had it right.

It was. Bogus. And I would like to. I'm coming with Grohl. There's good. I would like to go up and put my scarf and post up on the bar and and I take out my floor. I take out my floor.

and I play a little healing word spell and try to heal him of his drunkenness. Just a little of his drunkenness, not all of his drunkenness. All right, so as you play your tune, a beautiful little tune that the tantras to the air, the magical energies emanate from the notes you make, kind of drift into his torso. You can see this light glow and he kind of, Where's that blasted music? His hand goes out and the paw towards the flute. I don't know where that was coming from.

was coming from. Oh, I'm sorry, sorry to disturb you. Your name is of a great repute around these parts. His wife's a globial drool that's kind of crusted into his beard. Well, that would be a... You've bothered me not. But you weren't from bogus. Oh, we were wondering if we might perchance acquire your knowledge about town for a bit of a search.

What, two? Talk to him about fighters. Right, I hear you're a good fighter. You look strong. I've heard the same. Yeah. Right. Um, how often you get challengers in this tavern?

Uh, yeah. But as often as I get welcomed from my sleep, which is never, because so many stupid people do that. Boss Cos, abandon ship, abandon ship. Right, I have an intelligence of six, I know what I'm doing. Oh, okay. There is a very pretty lady over there with slightly pointy ears talking about you. Talking about you, what you. There's two of them, and they were actually wanting to ask you a question, if you would.

Make a persuasion. Why? Me? Yes. Throw it to us. I know. Why didn't? Because you were failing.

I was going to throw boobs at him, and I went to bones. He realized he was sinking. This little time you get that. All right. Oh, good roll. Up and, uh, oh yeah, look at that. One. 19.

Woo. 19. Yeah. Take a moment. He grabs the drink that you prepared from his hand, and he's gone five minutes. And he kind of stretches his back a bit. You can see this like gnarled hunch

that he holds in his physical posture, kind of flexes in a bit. And now you can see the rippling muscles that kind of show beneath his tunic. This is a built dwarf. You don't know what past he's had like moving boulders or forging crazy iron shit, but he's, there's a reason this guy has a reputation.

He stands up off of his stool, which you can now hear crap with the weight of a dwarf, which are made for normal dwarfs. This guy's a solid muscle. And he starts kind of saunter's over. He looks about for a second, almost like he's looking for his next target. Sees the pointy ears. He sees the pointy ears.

He goes, and just saunders up at the table, slams his hand down. Why is he coming towards us? Because you're supposed to ask him. Boobes. Boobes. Steady, here she goes, ladies. Sits down.

You're better at this than I am. You call for Bulgus. Why? Oh. Hello, Bulgus. Hi. You're so. We just heard you're so

impressive and masculine. Yes. We really wanted to talk to. I use my earring of whisper to Vex. Cool it down. Calm down. Not so sexy. Just be there. I reach out and I stroke his biceps. I can't hear that.

I use it again. I'm like, what are you doing? Keel, let's stop doing it. Proulesion check. Disagree. Proto. It's so good. I'm really low in charisma. Really awkward.

persuasion. Roll your persuasion. Oh, no, what was it? I rolled a two. It's all my friends, kid. Plus my persuasion of zero. Why am I not talking to you? As your arm reaches for his bicep.

I didn't say anything, I just touched him. As your arm reaches for his bicep, his hand, with belying his grumpy, half-asleep haze, with unnatural speed reaches out and just slats your hand aside, not painfully, but just as far as well. No touching the drunk dwarf. Sorry, pardon my friend, Lodge. She's just so impressed with your muscles.

We've heard amazing things about you here. Have you? We have. Tell me what have you heard. We've heard that no fighter can match your skills. You were correct. We've heard that you know more about this town than anyone else. I've been around a bit.

Yeah. I bet nobody knows more about the gray spines than you do it, and they've been around a long time. That little of political ass minds is what they are. Ass manes? Not keen to them, ass minds. Ask mines. They're not minds of an ass. Yes.

Oh, I thought you meant like mines. Sorry, go ahead. No, ass mines. Yes, they have ass mines. You're only too. No, I've heard that terrible. What do you do, Lucas? What do I do?

I own the brewery and thong. The only one. The best brewery. The only, of course it's the best. I put everyone out our business. We export the most of Taldori. This fail is amazing that I'm drinking right. Damn right, it is.

You set it down and he takes it from your hand a little bit, takes a sip of himself and sets it down again. So it seems that you aren't challenged often in business and in fighting. I saw it over. Hello. My name is Tyberon. Oh, God. Poor Ogden. You got one of your kind in a long time. Oh, who was the last Dragonborn you fought? Do you remember his name?

I recall his name was broken and bloody. I think that's a friend of yours. No, I know the bloody family. They're terrible people. Anyway, my associates and I were wondering if you would... Is that what we're doing? Trying to get into a cut with us? Anyway. We're trying to find out more about a gray spine.

Where it might be, who is associates might be. Gee, I'm so glad you came. Would you like to accompany us on this journey that we're taking? We're trying to find the gray spines. And you seem like you would want to come in on this. We think there might be something rotten in the mind. Make persuasion more. Oh, boy.

I'm assisting in this persuasion while, good God. I'm just waiting to get some of it. Oh, I get advantage. Oh, I get advantage? No, he does. 21. Yeah, so you get advantage of this. What was the first year old?

Three. And I'll take the 18. Definitely take that 18. Oh, plus my... Which is a nine. Which is a nine. Yes. Whoa, you have a nine persuasion?

That's why I talk. What? It's pretty charismatic. She goes, well, no. I don't really want to go anywhere with you. Oh, but if you're looking to go ahead and talk to the grace spite, you don't want to go anything handed. No.

What am I to come with a gift of some kind? What might they like? Well, what you say, I have the finest brewery in the city. Oh. And I have some fine, very rare, very exotic drinks that I could purchase sell to you. Hey, the dwarf. How much for this exotic ale? How rizotic you wanton.

We want to get in the door. We want him to like us. I can give you the finest of thistle branch dark blood wine. This was crafted by myself from a rare bloodthistle branch that I had brought over from the far-off city of Calorda. This I personally oversaw. It took me four years to fill this barrel full. It will cost you 500 gold pieces, but is a king's right wine.

Can I do a persuasion check, or a perception check, See if he's lying? Just be inside. Go ahead. An inside check? I'm going to walk over to draw really quickly. Oh. Oh.

What's in the back of him? Um, 27. He seems too drunk to lie. Let's just do it. I'll tell you what. Perhaps he would. Greetings adventurers. Spring has sprung here in Los Angeles and that means it's a brief period where it's only 75 degrees instead of 95 degrees.

I'll take it. And that means I've been outside a lot more. Walking around, occasionally galloping and after a toddler hopped up on juice boxes, traveling a bit, you know the vibe. And after doing some spring cleaning, my wardrobe, I gotta say, looking a little bit sad. I want clothes that can keep up with me and my son, but updating my wardrobe every spring sounds pretty expensive.

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We have some very rare items with us. In an oval. I think you might be interested in. Okay, quick, you've got one minute. Do you have any thoughts on this grog? We've got... What? Well...

It tends far worse the 500 gold you've been talking about. We've got this. You've talked. With us right. We've got a bunch of dragon pieces. We've got... We've got... A dragon...

We got 37 dragon teeth, one dragon eye, four cups of dragon blood, 3903. We've got this cup of dragon blood, which I know... Drog. That's a wager. ...to be added to ale or wine and makes it... Quite sensational. He takes the sealed cup and sloshes it around in his hand,

and you can see the actual liquid is coagulated to such a point that it's less of a blood and more of like... More of like a gelatin. It's like a good. Right. It's a bad. A spoon of it. He peaks open and...

Oh. Yes. I think that's really expensive, actually. I can have this appraise. But if you want to do a straight trade for the battle, what of this? Take it on that. Just go far.

I have four cups. All right, fine. One cup of it. Yeah. You have four cups. Yeah. All right. Takes the thing, takes the cup,

kind of puts it into a small satchel on his side. Adra! I, what do you want, you drunken bastard? They've bought me thistle blood wine, taking the out back. Here's the key. And she passes her a key. She grabs her, really? Just walked in, they're pying fancy.

It comes back with two other barmaiders, who are begrudently carrying it with her. It's a nice barrel. It actually has a gold trim. The actual bands that hold the wood together is in itself gold. itself gold. The branding on the side is gold leafed into the wood. It's like fine, fine, exquisite. We're talking like top shelf Bevmo style awesome Dwarven Wine. Top shelf and Bevmo.

Pass it. All yours. If this is I get you in the door, I'll leave my shoe. Have you ever done that? And where, maybe. Maybe. Where might that door be? Where might that door be? Minutes up. I have to ask around.

But it's great business with you. You do. We got a bag. I put it in the bag of holding. It does not fit in the bag of holding. What? You barely got Dork the Ox in there. Stop that to your...

But we did fit the small ox into the bag of holding and then realized later on that there's no airflow. I feel like we weren't going to discuss that. I felt that that was in the past. I thought it was never... If we drank some of it, it would fit. The barrel. It doesn't work at that.

Oh, yeah. Is that still in there? No, we actually got rid of the troll deck. Oh, okay. Can we trade the troll deck for something? I thought we like, we used it as a weapon. I offered it up, and by that time it had like turned into like a slimy. Oh, Val, Val, Val.

It was still impressive. I thought we threw it at somebody. Can I stock Azra then and ask her where Grace Blind Manor is? Keep men at whatever? She pokes. She said, well, I can nothing to do it. I can have him do it. She talks one of the barmaiders who kind of turns around.

This one's younger. He looks like he's kind of frazzled and maybe new here, or at least trying to make his way. He goes, OK, I can show your arm. Just follow me outside. Come, follow me. He walks out. He's got a little, like, an apron on.

And as you guys leave outside, he brings you to the edge of the outer walkway of the central ring you're on. He points across the way that you can see a series of marble pillars that outline what looks like a residential district that opens up consumes the other side. of the central ring of Kragam.

So if you look past far in that way, you'll look for the house of Grey Spine. It's the one that has dark black marble with gold tinting inside, the spiraling vein of the marble is gold. Nice. The gate outside is a rot-air black iron that's topped with a series of pikes, and which, like kind of awkwardly looks seconding. Not understanding.

And the real key point is, if you look in the front yard, you'll see a dwarf and statue of the current iron keeper of himself. So that's where you want to go. Yes, very helpful young man. Thank you. Of course, I give you the chance you could fill out a little form saying how helpful I've been and give it to that. Oh, there's suggestion cards here?

I would love to. Here, he pulls out a small parchment handwritten, with a couple checkboxes. You should give one all of us are copies, so you will have multiple. Yes, absolutely. Oh, this is fine. Sorry.

Confidence, we have a, confidence needs improvement. Oh, but the rest all excise. It's fine. Why not? What I do, apparently. He runs back into the tavern. All right.

All right, shall we go to the manna? Yes. For suggestion. Wait, we have five or six. We got to sleep. We got to sleep in. We might not want to bug when, you know, having dinner.

Because let's be honest, that gate's going to jack it. No, start. It's so sweet. All right, yes. Let's go sleep. Let's sleep. It's totally six. Why, before?

We have time to do other things. How long is a short rest? Short rest is around 10 minutes or so. I want to take a short rest. You've technically been short resting in the tavern? It's more of like a post-battle, like, take a breather, advantage your wounds, kind of just settle yourself after a harrowing experience.

That's one of the short-rest. What was the arcane mansion? What you're looking for is the House Thunderbrand. I want to head in that direction. Okay, so you're inviting from the party? I'm going to House Thunderbrand if anybody wants to die. What are you? I can understand you with that popcorn in your mind. Sorry. I'm going to...

I'm going to... ...I'm going to turn it for the evening. I've had a nice little short rest and I would like to ask them a few questions. All right. Yeah, go ahead. Okay. Cool. I'll answer you. No. We're... I think you and I are going to go to Grey's fine.

We'll check out the house. Do you need any help? Sure, you can come with us. No, I don't want you to say yes. No. No. We'll stealth our way. But just a moment.

Pike, you seem very distant. Are you all right? Pipe's not listening. She's trying in the chat room. She's feeling ill. Does she need to lie down? Pike is, and for those are curious in the chat room again, once again, like elements of this are house rules,

so don't complain. Oh. Complainers. We keep short rest of ten minutes because it makes it move faster. All right, so, Pike, Pike, Pike is kind of going along. She seems to be a little distracted. She kind of queners him.

He says, I don't know, I'm just, I feel like I've been here before. It's hard to explain. What? Hmm. What? Anyway, I'm probably going to go ahead and rest for the evening, and she heads back on the table.

Why is that, man? We'll find out next week. But first, what is she said? Or is in the bedroom. She said that she's in the bedroom. Lovely. Lovely. Grog and I go in search of a

Shall we say politely, whorehouse? The politer. Well, the clerics away and the barn shall play. We need a message. You find... You and I... You guys make your way to the Grey Spine Manor. You guys have your head to Thunderbrain.

Is Grog gonna find someone his size? Oh no. Percy and I spend some time making some really nice... Comment cards. Comment cards. I want to make some, all right, awesome. Beautiful comment cards. What's his name?

His name is Belan. Balan. We're gonna make some wonderful comment cards for Belan. Percy is wonderful with calligraphy. You've shown me. Yes, thank you. All right, seeing into that, you guys, do manage to find this called the Stone's Pillow.

The Stone's Pillow? It's an establishment of comfort in the east, and we'll run you both for the evening as you are. Not Craghammer locals, 30 gold for the night each. A bargain. We'll take it. Thirty gold. But what sort of...

Why is everything so much more expensive here? Because it's twirling. Ladies will we find there. Bearded ladies. What species? I'm sure the... The madam of the house introduces you to a spectrum of ladies, mostly dwarven and very attractive, you know...

Do you deal with... They're not known. This is a nice establishment. There is one no. One female known. There are a number of male dwarves as well that are standing at the ready. There is one elf that looks a little shy and kind of like embarrassed the Goliath walking. That's our choice. I'll take the tallest one.

I'll take a dwarf. Okay. So you choose your lady, you take the tallest one which will be the elf, you kind of look. As you walk into the shy elf, the shy elf turns around entirely. She is aggressive and throws you around. Oh. You got your money's worth.

You get bandhandled on the way that you have. You're going to be sore in the morning. You're going to be sore in the morning. Thank you. Welcome to crack hammer, gentlemen. I like a reality. You guys, both are you just walking up to the manor? Are you doing?

No. You're going to try to check out what it looks like. Okay. See what the guards are like. Yeah, we'll pretend to take. take a stroll, poses a married couple. Ew, no. Just the purposes of sneaking around the house.

I don't know if that's illegal in crack. How about we pose his brother and sister, creepy? You've come on to every human, orc and half elf in the entire kingdom for pretending to be my wife for 30 minutes too much. Yes, it's disgusting, so no. Probably right. He's got standards.

Okay. So we'll take a stroll. Okay. See what the area is. As you went to the residential district, it is dark, and you see the redstone that kind of permeates the area for a low, gentle and below the entire city, is now clustered into these street lamps that are throughout the entire location. As you begin to press into the residential district property,

there are some nice homes that are carved into the side of the rock, there are some standalone homes that are built at a fine stone. You eventually make your way towards a nicer part of it where you start seeing some of the more marble building, some of the more exotic stone work being used the construction of the homes. You also notice three of the guards that are part of the city's establishment there are following you from behind, curiously.

The Carvers. The Carvers. No weapons drawn, but definitely hands at the ready. Okay. Well, we could just keep walking. We could. That could be bad. Yes.

Well, we just want to look at the house. No. We're not going to go sneaking in the day. Lara. Lora. Louder. Louder to the mic. Let's say which ones are very obvious about being pritting, so we look like we're just sightseeing it.

All right, so as you continue to walk, eventually some of the dwarfs approach. I point and say, oh, look at that one with the carving. It's amazing. The architecture is divine. Divine. They're posing as the howls? Let's look at this door. The marble dents are on this.

It's really cool. So, you get about 20 more feet before you. Heyo! Help! Oh, my! Yes? Your foreigners are wandering too far in foreign districts you don't belong to. What's your business? Oh, I'm so sorry. I'm just so amazed by the architecture here.

I wanted to see the beautiful sculpture. We definitely are. Visitors here, sir. No one has explained, I guess, good rules. of rules to your city. We were just taking in the fantastic architecture and history of Craghammer. We were told there was a beautiful sculpture down the street of the ruler of Craghamper. Make a persuasion roll. Oh, Jesus. Oh, God. Either of you, which would you prefer? Only I was there. 21.

That's good. All right. All right. Wow. Well, pretty decent. The guards come up to each other. The one that was talking to you, you can see now, is you kind of a little closer into the light. kind of a frazzled black beard that's put into a very, very tight braid that goes down to his belly button, all wearing the same basic chess plate, long black kind of velvet cloak behind, each carrying some sort of heavy warhammer around the side of the belt. Steps up and says, Well, just to tell you the rules here,

if you're going to go ahead and wander at night in the very expensive district, you don't want to do it by yourself, because you either have chances of being mugged or arrested you. We might have arrested you. Oh, no. I'm so sorry. Do we need protection? Yeah. And one of them looks over and sees the bear that is off in the shadows nearby.

Oh God. I got Tringott safe. No, no. Cool, cool. What is that bear doing? Trying to keep up with its wonderful master. Come along, Trinquet. There's nothing to be scared.

What's a bear? What's a bear? It's a bear doing it! Kahnhammer! They'll grab out their war hammers. Oh, no, no, please. He's quite harmless. In fact, he's very scared. scared of most people. He's completely trained. He does tricks. He does. Drink it. Show them your

wonderful shake trick. At which point, drinking kind of like, just kind of shakes the body. It looks at you confused. It's kind of... If you put your paw out, if you put your hand out, he'll shake your hand. Yeah, see? We'll take a step back at the clock. I'm not doing that. That's all right.

I would say if that's your animal, don't bring it here. Good to know, good to know. A Trinket, head back to that tavern. Would you, if people are getting nervous. I love you. Trigate against a walk back. You can see a couple of other dwarfs that are wandering,

carrying some package designs. Make a very wide berth around this armored bear that's kind of solely moping its way through the street. its way through the streets of Craghammer and Arbor. I could possibly go wrong. Don't worry, he's a sweetheart. He's a devil. You're in the distance.

Oh, you're in the distance. Look, I'll show you to the statue and that's it. Go. All right. Thank you. I don't see any happen. Honestly, I'm excited to meet you. So I'll just, let's do this quickly.

Yes. Come with me. He leads you further into the cityscape. Down the road, you end up going through a few balloons. You find one large wrought iron fence for the series of carved spikes towards the top, and you see the beautiful dark marble building with the gold trim. Oh, this one's amazing. This is what you're talking about, grey spine, my lord.

What of rich sundeviches. Wow. So you said the grey spine to own this one. It's stunning. We only heard about the building itself. What can you tell us about the people who Olivia? Bunch of rich sons of bitches. Well, we can tell that. Actually, Iron Keeper's all right. He's been doing a great job that the rest of the family can suck off.

Oh, really? Not liked by the rest of the city then. Oh, they have friends everywhere. But I person, don't worry them. They run business for them. They work most of their employees to the ground. Oh, no. Yeah, that sounds terrible.

I don't think it's how you're in business for. I mean, it's how you're in business for profit, but not for a year. Wow, it sounds like they would run the mithral mine, which we've heard is just so hard on its employees. No, that's the one. Oh, really? Yeah. Yeah. I don't go that far, Seth.

Doesn't interest me. No, right. Brimstone. We prefer the company of good, hardworking people, like yourself. We're very impressed with the work the Carver's doing this city from what little we've seen so far. So hats up to you. I appreciate that. You know, it's not easy life.

You can't have borne into it, and it's been most hard training, which I get very... You see the tour of the dwarfs that are now about three steps behind and go, All right, Damson, they've got to get back to our poses. Oh, sorry, look, we've done out too much. Just follow us back, go about your business. Don't run out here at night and good luck. Thank you so much. We follow for a couple of blocks behind them for a bit.

Make sure that they're paying attention to us. All right, they bring you back towards the entrance of the residential district. And then we stelz and go. Yes, we're still. I'm going to roll stealth, both of you guys. Am I currently being beaten by a whore dwarf, right? You make a constitution check. Hang strong, buddy.

That's a mouthful. 18. Hordorffat Hordeaux. Hordeaux. Hordeaux. 20. Horshack. Hordeaux.

You have impressed your female dwarf. Are you making a sex check? Yes. By the middle of that or two. I'm sex check. That happened, that's the first time. That's actually. She's shaking me.

So that's not comfortable. So that happened. So where do you guys roll 20? He rolled a 20, and I rolled 15. That's okay. As you guys begin to wander off. They're professional cards. Vax, you vanish.

Vex, take a couple of steps. steps. Hey, hey, hey, hey. I told you, it's dangerous down there, don't do that. Of course. Where is your friend? Oh, he went already back to the tavern that was staying at. I was wondering if maybe you could show me around the rest of the town.

It looks the other guards and they're like, obviously fed up with his friend here and they're not too keen on you guys. Well, uh, you guys hold the post. Tell me better quite walk around this. All right, but I'm gonna tell the boss. Fine. Don't get this. It's chance very often.

I wave off from the alley that I snuck into. Oh, God. You do your shit that you do. All right. In the meantime. And back to the shadows. Tabaris. Oh,

damn it. You ask around, and it takes a while, especially as a dragon-born, some folks are like, oh, I'm not talking to you. Some folks like, oh, yeah, right over that way. And it's completely wrong in directions. It takes you a good, like, two hours to adventure. find your way to House Thunderbrand.

When you get there, it's a beautiful, beautiful alabaster building. Large, white dome with small spires built into one of the more of the more elevated ceilings of Kraghammer proper. You can see on the outside, there is no gate, just an open lawn. You see grass. You see what looks like normally outside flora and fauna currently adorning the scape around this structure. Whoa.

Well, this is a lovely sight. I'm going to saunter on up to the door. All right. Go and make a perception check. What is my perception? Oh, uh, five. Five. You saunter right up to the edge of the grass line

and get one step onto what suddenly becomes visible to you, or rather a subtly carved dwarven room. dwarven ruin in the ground. In fact, there's a bunch of them outlining the entirety of the grass. As you're, you're like, oh-oh, that's a dwarven run. That's a good voice. I've been practicing my Tiberius. It's close. I'm working. Go ahead and roll a dexterity saving throw.

Uh-oh. Saving throw? You got it. You got it, Tiberius. What is this? Dexterity. Dexterity. Oh. That's 15.

15. 15? All right. You managed to pull back to lessen the impact, but a bolt of bluish energy bursts out from the room in front of you, throwing you about three or four feet behind the room. You catch yourself. You do suffer eight points of Thunderledge. Okay.

Dam gated communities. This is why we go to brothels instead of sneaking around at night. No lightning. It's a whole different kind of damage you can suffer. Okay. Well, I just myself off. Apparently this has some security. Um, hello! Do you go. Did any happen?

You wait about two or three minutes, no response. Okay. Two to three minutes. That's a long time. Yeah. I have a feeling they're gonna respond to the crazy guy. Yeah, very well. What are you doing? We're making comment cards. We're making comment cards.

Yes. You're all going to have comment cards so you're expected to fill out when you return back to the bar. Yes. Because what was it? Baldus? Baldus? Balus? Balin. Bellin was so nice. Balin. He was so nice. Dearest Baldwin. Do I see, what do I see around the Paris? Do I see any large, like, rocks or any kind of large, like maybe pillars, like, maybe rooms like just setting on those things that I could. Best room you can tell them this is, it's fairly dark down. You can see that the building itself just has four-corner spires around the large central dome structure.

Each one of these spires is a very, very thin, tall, alabaster spire that at the very top of the crest and some sort of a bluish crystal that comes to a point. They're probably a good thirty-five, forty feet tall. About as tall as the rest of the structure. Okay. You can't really tell how far back the structure does because it meets with the back of the cable. I'm going to... Hmm. I'm gonna shoot a fireball.

Just right in front of me. Kind of like, roll it, like bowling ball. Right to the door. Okay. There's a baby right there. You are four feet from the door. Oh, I'm four feet from the door? I don't do that.

I don't do that. You can step back and do it. I'm only four from the door. Oh. And pushed you back four feet from the room you stepped on. Like, you're not at the door. Can I use that, uh, episode. You know what's going on there?

Episode one, Tiberius kills himself. Don't die. I should have come with you. Bowl that fireball, dude. Because you used to the important source, and everyone is level nine to go to a good to. Damn it. I use a mage hand, and I knock on the door.

From that far away? Okay. Yes. The mage hand kind of create, the arcane energy kind of swirls up and forms this loosely hand-like appendage that drifts towards, as soon as the mage towards, as soon as it crosses over the room where you stepped on, there's a spark of energy, and the hand is dispelled. Damn, these rooms.

Ah, hmm, okay, fine. I'll do glacial blast right up to the door. Okay. But not to the door. What? Right. So as you coast... You're alone. The glacial blast forward, the ice begins to congeal across the bottom of the floor. As it reaches the front of the room, there's another spark of energy, and the ice kind of forms up against an invisible barrier that's there.

and then the ice that's up against the barrier melts extremely quickly drifting into a puddle of water. Shit. I turn back and go to the group. As you turn around, there are four harvors that are hurrying towards you now with their hammers out. Oh, Jesus. You! You! What? They all kind of surround you on all sides.

You have a dwarf in each corner. Like, you have attacked one of the great dwarfen families of Craghammer. Name yourself in your business before you're under arrest. Don't speak to me. me in that manner. I am Tiberius Stormwind. I'm snoring after having sex. Make a condation check. All four carvers can take a step back, look at each other. Look, we're just doing our job. What's your business? I understand that and I'm sorry for losing my temper.

But I was just looking to ask questions of particular artifacts I've been looking for and this house is the only known arcane house I know that I was pointed to. I tried to reach them and communicate, but I would stop by this stupid ruin I can't figure it out. So I was turning back to get to my tavern to get some rest and come back and try to contact the family the next day. And then I was stuck by you! Make you place for you. Uh, 24. I've just arrived in New York City. I'm going to smash the doors.

Uh, the dwarf guards kind of with each of the grandees. One of them steps forward, and this guy, You can see now he has more carvings into his arm. He looks to have a little more rank up than the ones. And he steps forward. Kind of ruddy brown, beard, his eyes itself are pitch black. There's almost no color to the irises. And he was, look, look. Look, let me do off this once.

But if you so much is spit in the direction of any other dwarf in this city, Bergen and bury you so far underneath the dungeon that you want to say the light of day till the day you rot. You hear me, Dragon Boar? I mean, yes, my hearing's perfectly fine. Get on. Get on.

You just hammer back in his side, and the opposite separate, would scare you down as you walk past. Good day. Back to the tavern. Okay. You, you go ahead and make your way through the alleyways, eventually back towards the building proper. What would like to do?

I'm just going to watch, that's all. Do I see the security details, see who's going in the place? There are carvers doing rounds around the city, on the streets, just kind of wandering through repairs, keeping watch. You don't see any particular guard outside. You do see individuals moving past windows. There's a little bit of light from the inside of the building. No carvers or any sort of guard detail, outside the house, anything like that? Not between the gates, like, of the yard area and to the front door.

But heavily, heavily guarded by the looks of what's inside and what's outside the gate? Outside the gate, you're hard pressed to find a moment where the street isn't visible to some carver. This area is pretty well guarded. You figure largely because the person who is currently the iron keeper of the entire city, Picardhammer, lives within that building as well as one of the more powerful dwarfed so it's pretty well watching. Okay. I'm just going to head back to the inn then.

I'm not going to put these bare. You all eventually gather back to the tavern. Ah! How was your night? That was wonderful. I don't know about you. I have hickies. I have hickies.

Higgies, is that a Nomeish STT? Yes. Yes. Crazy, I have some hickies too, actually. What? And we have comic cards. Yes, here you go. Success all round.

Did you learn anything, vex and backs? I definitely think we should take the diplomacy route. There's a heavily guarded there. There's a knock at the room you guys are currently talking in. Yes. Unless, are you in the tavern proper? No, no, no, we're in. I'll get it.

Right. Hello. Adra sitting there looking a little nervous. She was, hi, sorry to bother you. Is that bear one of yours? Oh! Yes, Trinket. Isn't he adorable?

The war is over and both sides lost. Kingdoms were reduced to cinders, an army scattered like bones in the dust. Now the survivors claw to what's left of a broken world, praying the darkness chooses someone else tonight. But in the shadow dark, the darkness always wins. This is old-school adventuring at its most cruel. Your torch ticks down in real time. And when that flame dies, something else. rises to finish the job. This is a brutal rules light nightmare with a story that emerges

organically based on the decisions that the characters make. This is what it felt like to play RPGs in the 80s and man, it is so good to be back. Join the Glass Cannon podcast as we plunge into the Shadow Dark every Thursday night at 8 p.m. Eastern on YouTube.com slash the glass cannon with the podcast version dropping the next day. See what everybody's talking about and join us in the dark. You know that feeling when you hear one interesting thing, and suddenly you want to know more. Well, that's the idea behind my podcast, something you should know. Every episode starts with a question you've probably never thought to ask, like why people do or don't like you, why certain habits stick, or what

everyday advice is actually wrong. I'm Mike Carruthers, and I talk with scientists, authors, and experts, and I keep it practical, surprising, and fun to listen to. If you've got a curious brain, Come try one episode of something you should know. On the podcast app you're listening to right now. Want to go? And you hear in the tavern, I'll see right back. You head downstairs,

and you can see all the dwarves are now gathered around the fighting ring in the center of the tower. And trinkets now inside the ring. Oh, shit. With a couple other dwarves around, like kind of just prodding and pushing it into the ring. No, no, no, no. Oh, my God.

There's Roush is cheering, like, ah, yeah, yeah. I've been listening to you. I followed my sister downstairs. I go down too. I run down with Rog. As you guys head down, you can see now Bulgus is now up and like,

looking his chin in like, oh. No, Fugas! Fugas! Trink it, come here! I want to let to curse. Drink it, come here. You are very much electric curse. Isn't that right guys?

Fuck yeah. All right. No, no, no. And I run into the ring with him. Okay, as you run into the ring, a couple of the dwarfs kind of pat you in the back and you kind of, oof, get it shoved into the ring. There's now Trinket and you. Oh! I'll take on this bear.

All right. Make a general charisma check. Dude, it's, fuck that bear up. Oh, no. Where'd you roll? A one. So as you rush and you guys come into the front, you see, Volgis sees this, and now you can see both eyes are open, which means he's sobered up a bit.

of it. Oh, no, this bear's mine. You want to fight too lice? Oh, it'll wake you right up. Lesteris. I, um, I cast a fog over the ring. Okay, as everyone's kind of cheering up and getting ready, this very thick fog begins to fill the center of the bar area.

You can now see a majority look, wait, what the heck, some of coffee and somebody like, what the hell is going? I run up in the fog and I tap Shinket, I whisper in Trinkets ear and I say, Trincent, I'm tapping you out. And I turn into a bear like shrinkets. What? Good. Okay. And I first, wait, wait, first I polymorph trinket into a squirrel.

You can do that? I can. Like a marymorph? No, no, no, no, a mouse, like a rat. A little tiny. It's like a tiny, like a rat. You see the shadows here by the fog, you hear that like, come out, I'm gonna get me. You can see this, you can see ball against the shadow.

I'm just swinging wild. Is the air angrily? I don't know. Yes. You go ahead and you grab Trinck, Trinck, shrinks down into a tiny little mouse. And I think, I think, Scanlan, catch Trinket.

Oh, Jesus, I don't like that, but I'll keep it. Okay. Trinit, the little mouse face, the moment you see it, looks very confused, very scared. It's okay, it's okay, it's okay. I'll protect it, don't worry.

And then I bear to form. My good fight into a bear form. Now, Kila's down this giant bear, where Trinket once was. I got my money on Bullsack. Don't bet against the enemy. In the fog, I somersault over some random dwarf and pull out my dagger, but turn it around in my hand

and whack all this in the back of the head as I can, just to try to knock him out. Can you see it in fog? He's a really good fight. Go ahead and make a self-check. You have advantage because you are in fog. I'm at the balcony, by the way. You have a vanity, you have a fanage.

Oh, thank you. Go watch my phone. Remember, he's our friend. I'm taking a short-class. Don't want to kill him. I'm taking a short-class. The long as his drunken, kind of miscovered state does not seem to notice your approach.

He is swinging wildly, though. You are, he has a disadvantaged attack on you as you approach. One of his fists just swings past you. That is going to be a 12. I don't think that hits. You just narrowly dodge out of the way. You can feel the fist just, whoof, pass one of your ears.

As you come back up, clutching the base of your dagger, go ahead and go for your strutting. All right. Oh, my gosh. Come on, tape butter, you got it. Let's go. Go. That's new glue.

Oh, is the advantage still? Oh, I have an advantage on the attack roll for this? Because he does not. See you, yes. Yes. You are currently stealthed. Much better. That's a much better.

That all hits. So go ahead and roll a sneaky attack damage on this, of course. Plus regular? Don't kill them. Well, it's, we're considering it non-lethal damage because this would be based on the dagger. I'm having an a little. I'm watching an ale while watching.

You're watching a lot of fog. And I'm like, this is fog. I'm blindly looking for Trinket. Trinket's in my hands. Where's Trinket? And you see a giant bear there. You're like, there's Trinket. That's not Trinket.

And I hug. Oh, no. What's happening? You're very confused. Trinquet now has no armor. It's a slightly different shade. No, he's close enough, man. Come on.

I've been around Trinkett enough. Come on, man. 27, right in the base of his skull. All right. Jesus. Crack, a resounding impact hits. And there are now dwarves that are like, hey! Ooh!

Like all the cheering stops, and there's this lull, quiet hits. Bogus hasn't moved, by the way. You impact, and it's like hitting a wall. And there's this, like, this taut, thick stump of muscle where the dwarf neck is. And as you pulled back the dagger, his hand reaches up, and grabs your wrist. His head slowly turns towards you, and he goes,

Bonus action to disengage. Disengage is rogue. He's going to attempt to grapple you. Oh, no. Go ahead and make either an acrobatics check. Go ahead and an acrobatics check. All right, all right. Oh, that's fine. That's a 30.

That's a 30? Yeah. You managed to just slip out of his grip. Barely. He was about to clamp on. As you step away, he turns towards you and goes, Oh, I feel alive tonight. Bring it all of you.

I want to smash your face him. There's like a little bit of ale froth at the corner of his mouth that's like beginning to trip into his beard. It's quite an awful sight for those that are close enough to see it. The rest of you just see these shapes and movement. But there's still just kind of like, okay, what's going on kind of a feel? You hear Arden back going, stop this, this is! I can't even see. What is it? She's frankly trying to stop this chaos.

There's now a bear. What are you doing, Keyleth? I'm a bear. You're a bear. I'm a bear. What happened? You're rare. What are you doing?

You see the shape of ball gets just like, ha, ha, in the middle of this fight ring. Um, so... Do some tricks, do some tricks. Start clapping and like dancing around. Okay, okay, that's a good idea. I go... What she tells you.

I go... You can... I see her as my, like, ...trainers and I'm like, boom, oh... ...circus bearing. Gather round and this is the amazing trick- I'm gonna cast... I'm gonna make music from my...

...my sham... ...instrment, which exists. Which exists. Yeah, it does? A rousing jaunty bear-like tune. And I'm going to cast presidigitation and do fireworks on top of that. Okay. You should give me a fez.

Now mind you, mind you. Can I do a little hats? You haven't done a fez yet. You need to work on that. Oh, no. I'll try. So if you ever seen fireworks go off in a cloud, you get that little, there's a bunch of that above you.

Cloud light flashing. Oh, I all like the fog. You begin seeing your tune. Do you give an inspiration nice to her? Sure. I would love to get it. Give her an heart. All right, so a D8 inspiration dice from the bard is you hear the enchanting, jaunty bear dancing theme.

Oh, look over there, it's a bear, yeah. Bar getting his barred on. Go ahead and make a performance check. Oh no. Oh, me? No, she does. What? You're performing is a bear.

Yay! Do you want to add your performance dice? You know that, that's a bear dance. I'm sorry, the inspiration dice. No, it's a natural 20. It's a natural 20. I don't know what to save it. I'm inspired for later.

Okay. I'll think back to that moment. You weren't even inspired to be inspired for this. All right, so in this array of strange puffy fireworks in the fog, you're doing this little kind of rotation. You actually made just do a bare cartwheel and like slam into the rip, but it looks pretty cool. You get back up, you're on your eye and legs.

You dance on one foot for a second. At which point, ball gets like, just starts laughing, doubles over, clutching his stomach, laughing his ass off, other. Dwarf start laughing too. The music gets louder and the band in the back of the tavern and gets playing again. There's now this kind of general jovial air restored

to the tavern. I grab an empty cup off of a table and say, tips for the bear right here. I didn't get money for this? Of course. Beeline to the bar and say, large mug of ale, please. And as soon as it's ready, bring it right over to Muggles.

All right. You guys are pulling through a crowd. Covered mist still. You're having a hard time finding your way through the bar. The people are at least now cheering in the mood. There's still some people trying to find their way to the front to see what's going, because they hear the music and they hear the cheering.

Like, let's go, no, move on that. They're pushing their way through. You make your way to the bar. You see Adra's just like really nervous. Like, yeah. I can fix this. I can fix this. How, do, go.

Here, go. Just hands you one. Doesn't even charge you for it. I'm still dancing. Still dancing. Looking for Bogus in the crowd. Oh, he's still in the center of the ring. No one's still getting near Argus.

People are just cheering off the side. All right. as long as she's laughing. Oh, a growl for me to a happy growl. Hey, I'm a happy growl! Oh, it's been so long since I've been outside. Oh, a little tear on edge of his face. As you approach up aside.

Arm around the shoulder. Immediately instinctively just slaps it off his arm and turns around. Take this, take this. You are an impressive specimen, my good man. I have never had a fight. That amazing in at least a week, that was something to see. Here, take this and after this one, there's three more.

He's drunk, you're offering him ale, and he's just been laughing at bear for two minutes. Make a persuasion roll with advantage. Yeah. Do persuasion, you say? 15. Two rolls. Two rolls.

Have you advantage? 15. 15. He looks at you with this big grin, and you can now see his gnarled yellow dwarven teeth. this like a railroad of terror that his mouth is, this big smile, and he reaches out. His beard just kind of poofing over the side,

grabs it and goes, see, this is dwarven hospitality. And he lifts his drink up and it spills a little bit on his arm, and he's like, hey! And everyone kind of lifts up and cheers again. Hey! Ha! You hear, everyone still keeps drinking through the fog. It's like a bad sauna in here right now.

Everyone's just kind of fighting their way through. At which point now, the bulls kind of slapsed you on the shoulder, takes a drink, and wanders out of the fight ring, and goes and finds a table to sit down and begin chugging what you gave him. Why don't we adjourn for the evening? Why don't you go turn to our rooms? Oh, God, yes. Yeah, and I guess I'll, if we can let shrink it. Can I take the mouse?

Can I take the mouse? Here, a rat mouse thing. Oh, is this Arbor teeny tiny too? Oh, does he have a tiny arque house? I'm also Arborchette. If you choose Wal-Walli. While polymorphing him, you could make it as a visual aesthetic. But because it was a quick impact, I will say it just looks like a little mouse right now.

Sorry, but next time. Next time I'll do a little tank. Well, you're still adorable little dog poking. I'm still giving my little pocket. All right. I grab a half of a month to stop the table and say, for all we can't have expected a better welcome here in Craghammer. We'll see you tomorrow night for round two.

Thank you. I was like, hey, Vogue more! You said three more! She's empty cup on the table. We did say three more. I laugh and hustle over and say, one, two, three, put him in a row with this gentleman right here. She's like, I'm thanks.

She gives you like a really earnest, like, thank you. You now have a very good idea of how, you know, a good third of the tables in this tavern are repaired. All right, you guys head back up to the room. Yeah, that was like a . Oh, gosh. When you got the impact on him. He's good.

Oh, Brog's in a fight him. I have a feeling that's probably going to go down at some point. It's going to be dead with me. It's just the misunderstanding. I'm sure he's a little bit gentleman. So you guys head it back up to the room, which it's not a holly built for a bear. You're like, your shoulders are kind of squeezing the room.

Well, each one of your rooms comfortably fits two people, maybe. Like one and a half. So, I mean, Trinket can't, like, do a trinket. If you help push Trinket through the door, Drinkets thankfully, dwarfs are fairly wide folks, so the doors are a little, you know, built for stouter folk, which is not very tall.

You actually have to like bend through a garage to get into your room. And the bed, on the bed that you lie on, your legs dangle a good two feet off the bottom at maximum. But you can push Trinket through with like a one, two, three, poof! Or you can just carry it through as a mouse and then have her stuck in there.

That's all right. Neither of us need a blanket now. Well, how long can I keep our mouse? Can I keep her mouse? Him, she gets a boy, all of you, please. Up to an hour? I believe it is, yeah. Constraints is.

I'm trying. I'm trying. I mean, are they like stables? You know, yeah, let me go, can I go downstairs and ask about stables, maybe, stay in the stable? You have talked to Advert. She's like, you know, stables is established. We do have a downstairs storage area.

You have a bed can probably stay in. It's not too bad. Is that okay? Little mouse. All right. Yeah, he seems to think it's all right. Let's go with the storage room. Oh, but I don't give a shit.

This is the same thing that looks edible. You can eat it's fine. That's not true. I'm just kidding. I'll charge you leave. All right, so you bring Trinke back down. Do you release your polymer, yeah.

Trinke becomes barrigan. Oh. It's, it's probably a good 40 feet by 30 feet. Oh, so he's fine. In half of it's filled with, like, you know, barrels and crates and storage of dried foods, dried foods and drinking anything that comes in, just rummaging into one of the half-open sacks

of dried meat. That's going to be put on your meal. All right, so you head back to your rooms for the evening to rest. Anything you guys want to do in preparation for the next day? No, let's get it on. Oh, we should give our comment cards to... I think we should all turn in our comic cards. All right.

Oh, our comment cards. Turn your comment cards for belong. Your comment cards for Boulon. I can't stress how important this is. Maybe we should. Oh, go ahead. Sorry, no, no, really. No, it's fine.

Speak over me. Take him the extras. I'm going to give him the few extras so that he can have more comments. You guys are so kind of his comment cards. Perhaps we should all go to bed and the humans back in North Hollywood should take a pee break. The humans? You and you and you and you. Yes, indeed.

Do you want to take a quick restroom? break for the folks here. Hello, everyone. Welcome back. We've had our pee breaks. We've had our refills of our drinks. I've done the fireball. I think we're good for the next venture. So anyway, the party has taken the rest for the evening. Once again, this is one of those weird experiences where you wake up,

not because the sun rises, because you can't see it, in the northern city of Craghammer. But eventually you all come to consciousness naturally. What is your plan of action? Oh, Jesus, we should have talked about this while we were all We're going to read up everybody, right? Are we going to the manor? I say we have brunch and we go to the manner.

Brunch. Brunch. I want to have brunch with everyone. I want Dwarven brunch. I want a traditional. Dwarven brunch. Thank you. Dwarven eggs are very good.

I tell them of my experience. Very small. Okay. So Timberius fills you all in about his experience, trying to get into the houseland range. How you almost got killed? I didn't certainly not. I just couldn't get in the door.

Why did you think that after the magic hand failed, that the big thunder ice wave would work. What I thought is I could cover the room with ice and just merely stepped over it. I didn't think it would dissolve my ice. I mean, did you sleep? And his defense is not even white after that. That's true. I don't make sure, you know.

I got sorcerers tries all these tricks before, you know, turning around, which is what I did. I think we should go back there because I feel that's significant that I couldn't get in so easily. We will go back there. I don't think it's the next order of business. but I think that we're not leaving the city without dealing with that. Do we need to do something with a comment card? Please.

Did you not fill out your comment card? No, I did, but I know like three letters, so. I'm sure that's right. It's like A, F, and A. Yeah, that's okay. That sounds very positive, I think. It's the thought that counts, Gras.

I'm learning. Did you put like a smiley face next to the A and A? I'll cover my hand at ink. That works. Hmm. Very good. That was well. Shall we try to make our way to the manor then?

The gray spine manor with our cask of fancy ale. Does the light ever change being on the ground? No, it is a perpetual low red glow from all the stones that are embedded around the street. It's all checked out. It's like that. It felt really sleepy and also very awake at the same time. No, no.

Oh, dwarves. Yes. What do you think? Yes. Go ahead. You guys make your way after your brunch, your delicious dwarven brunch. Thank you. Which is very alcoholic.

On the way there, I'm going to catch all of the weekends. Every male that's going to come with something out of the haul. Did you catch that? He just turned himself into a dwarf. You did? Tavier's into a dwarf in form. What kind of dwarf? What do you look like? He's very handsome for a dwarf.

Are you a girl for? Oh yes. You should be a baby dwarf. I will not do that again. Oh, you did do that. You did take it as a troll. Almost! She showed off the penis. What's going on?

That's where the troll deck here from. Don't you remember back? I was almost raped by trolls. There was a cavern interaction with two male trolls that they had stealthed up behind as a party. I love explaining this to the audience. Tiberius then polymorphin to try and bugs bunny them, not realizing that dwarves who are underground and don't encounter female trolls.

Trolls. Trolls can counter female trolls often enough to have a one-track mind. And so he nearly got himself in a very bad situation. That was remembered by the party attack. by the party attacking and Vex over here shooting off the troll's dick, which then went to the bag of holding, which is this guy. That's also where the hashtag not all trolls came from. Yep, hashtag not all trolls came from that game.

Not all trolls. That is horrible. Oh, yeah. And so, bring it back. You guys make your way to the residential district. The same guards were there who were there the previous night that encountered you guys. And so as you rolled with an entourage, how many are there? Currently, there are four.

Hi. I wave at Thompson. He's actually not there. It's the two others that are with you. He is noticeably absent. Oh, there's Thompson? He's been giving the day off. Oh, really?

But as you can see, we brought one of your citizens with us to show us a tour of the city. That's you. Citizen, I haven't seen you, Barlow, it's your name. Oh, my name is Tiberius Kraghammer. Here is Craghammer. That's a... Like Johnny New York.

So, where are you Craghammer? Oh, John Hammer. Johnny New York. So what is it? Craghammer or what was it? I met Stronghammer. Crackhammer is my father's cousin. How drunk are you?

I've been drinking since I've woken. See, he is one of them. See, he is one of them. I have a lot of breakfast. Oh, yay. 19. 19. Oh, my.

Oh, I hope. There's Tiberius Kragmer. All right, all right. No, I haven't seen you around, but obviously it's a bit early to be that fucked up. You've been very depressed, you know. Well, what's your business? I'm asking again. You've already seen the statue.

Yeah, we saw the same, but we wanted to get a better look at it. So we brought this gift for the gray spines and we wanted to present it to them. The two nearest harbors step forward and kind of look at it. Oh, yeah. It's really nice. He's like, oh, yes. I'll tell you what, if you let us taste a bit of that, we'll let you go. Ooh.

Oh, I mean, I'm drinking a lot of it. I mean, I fumble of it because if any of it goes missing. Is it sealed? Is it sealed? Can we tell if it's sealed? You look at it. It does not have a current, any sort of port or exit on it, it is just a solid barrel.

Maybe we can save some for them. If we open it, it'll kind of ruin the barrel, right? Yeah, that's great. So maybe we can save you a bottle up when we open it inside, and we'll give it to you later. It's a very persuasionary. Should I roll that that one that failed me earlier or my little dice? The little dice, they never come out yet.

Tiny dice. 50-bitty-dice. Teeny-tiny dice. Okay, that's better. I rolled a 23. Okay. They all kind of look at each other. I'm like, if you can save enough for all four of us, please do.

Bring it back. We're looking forward to it. Do you have any flasks? Dad, you used to fill them up? We've got stuff. We've got. We've got. We've got lots.

We'll be waiting, and if you don't show the duke to our superpowers. to our supervisor. Here's the thing. You're gonna nod. Yeah, yeah, keep nodding. Here's the thing. I don't know if I can save four bottles with. But we'll save as much as I can.

Just say yes. Just say yes. Why? Yeah, I've got it covered. On our father's good name, we will bring you some of this. That is, that is, I don't know who we are, that is a promise.

It's a good day. They all look about each other. Fine. I'm there. Good waiting. They'll kind of look a little. They kind of lick their lips a little. They part and let you guys in the residential district.

You make your way to the very back. You can see how it's great fine. Once again, guys, for those who haven't been there before, it's a beautiful arrangement. The iron gate around it with the spikes at the top. You can see the entire front yard. It's about a good 80-yard walk to the front of the building itself. It's quite a distance from the front gate. And that entire area is filled with like a stone garden, various small sculptures,

small sculptures and just interesting knickknacks they've collected and kind of put on displays. The small museum as you approach the front of the house, it's fine. Yes. You get to the front door, it's a large double oak door, about maybe 10 feet tall, four feet wide. Currently closed, there is no handle on the door. No handle? No. So let's go.

Wait, wait, wait, wait. Don't knock on anything. Things shock you here. Let's go knock on the door. I want to double check to see if there's a bell to ring or if there seems to be some sort of of calling. Easily enough, you see it next to the door there is a small chain that just protrudes from the stone wall and has a small bulbous ball at the end. Ding ding. You pull it. Not a ding, but a large...

Oh. It is a heavier chain that you expect, and as you pull on it, you feel like some sort of large hammer-like object is slamming into a brass-type material as it echoes and resounds in the building. Definitely announcing your presence. Percy, can I try? If you mess. Okay. It echoes into the house.

Let's just hold up for now. I just wanted to do that one. No. Should we ding-dong ditch? No. Scallon, perhaps a little ditty on the strings would ease our introduction. I'll start singing a little jaunty welcoming song.

Hello, hello, we're here to tell you calling. Hello, hello. I don't know what rhymes with calling. Falling at the very least, I thought you would go right there. Yes, isn't it? Is it true? All right. You're just going to play the music just for the sake of it.

Yes, but I, yes, for now. All right. About 10 seconds pass before the doors, you hear a large, and one of the doors opens up. And you see a dwarf, with long gray hair, it slicked back and pulled them to a ponytail, a very small, trimmed beard, very proper, steps out in long black robes.

Yes, Percival of Regerick Stein von Musil Coahuaski de Rola III. You can call him Percy. I'm Percy. You can simply call me Percy, thank you. We're here to discuss some business with Lord Grey Spine, and we have of course brought gifts and our charming company. As well as our Dwarven compatriot to introduce this. Who? I'm quite drunk right now. Gives you an arm, right?

What's that be sure? Like a look of like trying to place your face. Which Lord are you looking for? Nostock. Actually, Nostock. Is he the nice one? I would like the nice one. No stock, I'm afraid, is currently working in the quarry.

Oh, of course, yes. If Gradon is here, is that I just, Gradon? You can still go, Graden is not taking visitors. Of course. That's a shame we brought this half barrel veil, right? And some very, very attractive mining contracts.

But if there's no one here to talk about them, then. mining contracts, you want to go ahead and handle the quarry and talk to Lord Pippity, but you can not forget on my notes. You know, you want to talk to No Stop Grace Fine, he's the one who runs the quarry. Oh, of course. Of course. As far as the Iron Keeper himself, I mean no offense, but only official political business. Well, this is definitely official political business, and I will also say, could you direct us to the quarry? We are new in town. Obviously.

Have you not known to show them with the quarry, his friend? I have knew I've been going on. He's been drinking since very early this morning. He's on vacation. I have to excuse him. But I must say, I'm having a wonderful time. You know, friends are in town. He's shown us around.

What was your name again? The dwarf kind of gives you a subtle work. My name is Margrim. I am the servant of the iron keeper himself. Marguerite, of course you're the servant. You're filled with poise and sophistication. And of course, above all protocol. I would not wish you to break protocol, which

as some simple directions for those of us who are wishing to do some official business, we write on your way and your house will return to order. The ironkeeper is not open to business outside a pre-approved portical understanding. Of course. If you don't have a pre-approved meeting put with an allegeer, you won't be seen. Of course not. For the mining contracts, however, when we need to speak to no-stop, Is there any way?

I hear it's very hard to get down into the mines. It's very well guarded, right? That's why we came to speak to him here. He kind of leans over and looks at the cask availances. Yes. Down to the mines, you just have to go to one of the platform, the chain platform both in the edge of town that will bring you to the base area.

Find your way to the mines there. That should be enough to get Nostok's attention. The rest is up to you. Lovely. Thank you. One moment before we adjourn. Do we want to try to get into this place, or are we just going to go to the mines? Maybe we should just talk to Nostok first. And ditch this place?

Every time we break into someone's house, things go forward. We're trying to get to the mines, essentially, so. I think he's still listening. Good man, good day. We'll be on the way there. You've been wonderful. Thank you so much. We plan on keeping some of this ale and bringing it back to the household.

Would you like some when we open the cask? It looks out of the cask. It looks up at you and since. I would not turn it down a sip of two. Lovely, we'll be sure to save you a small bottle. I'm going to turn invisible. You are? You are?

You are? You can do that? I'm sneaking into the house. Oh, two. Gosh! We are off the reservation. I believe all of our business. Well, good day. And he steps back into the doorway and

closes the large open door. You're now standing in the foyer of House Gracebine. A luxurious foyer, the actual floor itself is a fine kind of dark velvet red carpet. There are tapestries across the walls and small wooden in-table sets the edges of the hallway, this foyer area that contain sculptures and small vases and plants that exist under ground specifically. There's a large stairway that leads up into a proportion of the house, and two doors to each side that lead to rooms you no longer can see. I use the earring and whisper, what are you doing, Scalding? What are you doing?

I don't know. Give me 20 minutes. 20 minutes. That's okay. Let's all step away from the house. Okay, of course, we just step away from... Does he need, like, to ask if he needs assistance or like a, or like, divergent. Diversion. Divergent? Divergent. Morghum, of course, like, right to stand.

Can we all have them? Yes. Ah, fucking foreigners. I follow him where he's going. Okay. My nervousness, I let out a little bit of a far. This week was my own. Make it self-check.

Why are you making it harder on yourself? Oh, that plus 14 plus I'm invisible. Plus two. 16. Because you're invisible, I'll give you advantage on that growing up. Oh, 15, just because you can't pay that. 14.

That's two. All right, I'm 60. So, as you kind of scamper by behind Maagrim, following him towards it looks like the kitchen area of the abode. Maugham stops in turns. Rob's the stomach goes, I can't get him to walk forward, seemingly unperturbed by this apple. I'm just snooping around trying to see if there's any lords or higher ranking individuals in the area. Okay.

I'll say within the time that you're within the house, you wander through quite a few There's a wonderful music room which contains a number of Orban instruments that you've read up, and the many instruments that you know as well. They actually find another, what do you call it again? Shahm? A sham. A sham.

You've got another sham within. More finely crafted than the one that you have. A gift of lords, if you will. I'm so tempted, but no. Does he have an earring on? Does he have one of our earrings? We all do. No, not everyone.

Not everyone. He only made a few. He all has an earring. He can talk to me, apparently. Apparently. Tiberius, tell him to look for paperwork of something. For the mines. Scalman, look for paperwork of some plans.

And by the way, all of you should be hearing me right now. You all have the... Not everyone. No, no, no. You only made like five or something. That's right. Do all those things, Scabon. Great.

All right. As you look about the household, you also come across a couple of bedchambers that are locked. Pretty hefty lock. I can try. Okay. up the stairway, and you can see there's a long point that leads to essentially a throne room that is still partially under construction, mostly finished. And you can see it actually was an intentional build onto this house. House Grey-Spine, when the current Ironkeeper

went into office, it seems, began to have this room built. And so it's nearly finished, but it's an extravagant room with a large stone and dark metal throne steps lead up to it, and this kind of raised dais like pedestal in the center of the room. You can see a series of great, kind of magically glowing and flickering lanterns across the escape. And you see there are two dwarves inside that are finishing up the stone work. They're just like, you know, doing various forms of masonry and plastering in areas and carving out and chisling out pieces of stone to make it be intricately carved in his flavor, but that the room is currently empty. Okay.

There's nothing to steal. Drop a deuce in the bedroom. Damn it, Scanlan, just get out of that. What are you doing? No one. You totally should. A invisible poo. You have one. Percy has one.

I might as well try one of the doors that's locked and see if I can pick it, but I'm not good at that, so I'll try. Okay, do you have or have you having your person any sort of thieves tools? I have a forgery kit, a poisoners kit. Forge some thieves tools real quick. Climbing gear. I have a whip. Man, I have one of the earrings, and I say, Scallon, what exactly is the purpose for this little escapade and Will it be ending shortly?

Can I reply? You can through the message-based earchain. Just trust me that I have no idea what I'm here. So do you wish to pick one of the doors? Do it. Do it, try one. Okay, you have disadvantage on this. Of course I do.

Roll twice. Pike will mourn your death. We'll consider this a procedure to stay next area. 11 plus zero. You futz with the door for a good minute trying to bend a piece of wire you had, get to forge some tumblers, and eventually get to a point where you hear it. Tink! Ooh!

I mean, and it broke. I can't do two spells at once, so I will give it up. And I'll make my way to the door. Okay. The door is currently closed. I become uninvisible and I cast dimension door. All right. You blink through this small kind of purplish arcane doorway.

It rings you directly outside. You guys are waiting, it just pops into view. Holy God. It was crazy in there. People were farting everywhere. Really? It was not mean.

Really scatlin. They're building a throne room. There was some locked doors. Man, I wish you could have been there. It was exciting. but ultimately pointless, so let's go down to the mountain. I would like to stress again that none of these dwarves are our enemies at all. Yes.

We just want to go and have some worse. And we do not have our healers at present. It's okay. Well, we do, but she's very distracted. She's very quiet. Right, right. She wanted to stay at the end more. She's feeling awfully BAFTA today, so...

Oh yeah, it's quite that heavy. Let's make our way to the mines. The metal poisoning. The metal poisoning. To the mind, then yes. So let's go get this drunk dwarf. Yes, the bard was doing the lockpicks or lockpix. He was fashioning it from wire.

Exciting but pointless. All right, so you make your way to the edge of the center ring. You find that there are long spiral staircases that move to the bottom, or there are elevators that are under the bottom floor. The elevators are chain-based, kind of like a ratchet type system with two carvers there, of course. Of course, as you approach one, eventually you talk a little, but they lead you down there, but once you can give you kind of a look of,

what's your back? We point at the ale and give him a thumbs up. They kind of nod and let you pass. As you continue downward into the lower area, you can see the red stone that lets a lot of the kind of atmospheric glow of Craghammer is used less and less and a lot of more central torches and have flayed sconces. Almost like the stone itself, either is just rarer the further down you go, or has less of an illuminating power the deeper into the earth.

You eventually reach to the center part of the town. You now see, from where you're standing, a number of large structures in the very, very center of the bottom, part of the city of Craghammer. You can see, where is it? There is a giant, domed temple that is made of, like, golden bronze in the center. It looks almost like a gargantuan gazebo

that has doorways on each side that is currently closed off. No guards at it, though. You do see a number of other buildings. There's a large, large, heavy, heavy looking foundry far off to the left of you that has a little smoke that's coming off of it, but most of it looks be filtered into a giant metallic funnel that is then placed into the rock, almost like all the smoke-based exhausts

being funneled outside of the mountain. That is the close, that's the foundry. And then to the right of you kind of wander a bit, and you can begin to see that part of the mountainside to the far right, far right has that look of a strip mine. Or like a large portion of the minerals has been pulled away and is currently being mined further. So that looks like probably one of the better places

to look in looking for the Grey Spine Quarry. You eventually make your way to the outside of the quarry. You now look down into three large, large pits that just descend deeply inside of the mountain. This mine has been going for quite some time. And a large chunk of this looks like it may be being pre-almost like the mine is what's a growing crack. The more they mine into the mountain, the more they

fill the mine area with further city construction. It's this self-repetuating cycle of expanding the city downward. Currently in the quarry, you can see there are a number of large stone dwarven buildings on the edge of it, one of which is the largest of them all. Looks like we made of a more of a black and red kind of iron aesthetic. Some of it's been oxidized a little bit and kind of has that rough and tumble iron feel.

And that one has the most guards around the base of it. The carvers are gathered entirely around it. Looking down into the center of the you can see towards the bottom there are a number of tunnels that lead into the hillside of the Cliffkeep Mountains proper surrounding gravel. Let's go ahead. Let's walk towards the guards. Let's just do this directly, I think.

Just swords out. Wait, wait, wait, before we go up, I take the cascabale and I grow some pretty flowers on it, and I make a nice pretty bow, and it's shining up a little bit, make a nice point now. Good work, Eddie. No, I'm just, it's just, it's just, it's a pretty little bit. It looks like a fruit fax now. It does not look like a group. It's not that ostentatious.

The Earl of the Month Club. Those are some powerful power. In her defense, they probably don't see flowers. That is very fair. It's a nice touch. All right. I'm going to take this opportunity to cast Stone Skin and myself.

Okay. Stone skin is placed on you. Are you a dwarf still? Are you a dwarf made of stone? You have not turned alter self off. You are still a dwarf. Yeah, that's fine. But stone skin is a constriction spell, so yes, that would eliminate the ultrarskin.

Okay. Oh, so you're back to you're back to. We've revert back into your dragon form, robe self. The sunskinned is in effect. You using your, what's it called again? Druid craft. Druid craft, thank you. The crescentification for hippies.

Right. Portions of the wood begin to sprout from the outside of this dark wood barrel and form these kind of entangled IEV vines that eventually embraced the entirety of this cast with little buds of kind of dark, ruddy flowers. Something that would definitely appeal to a dwarf an aesthetic. That's hot. You approach the guards.

I wish there are eight currently at the front. They're already impaired. Can I see which one of them, use my perception to see which one of them looks maybe the most interested or weakest. In sight, which one of them looks most interested in our party? Yeah. Oh, good. I thought that was the one, but it's not.

It was 13. 13, okay. Strangely enough, they are fairly distracted, and after a rather long, uneventful morning, Most of them are just used to being an armor and waiting for any business to go down. There are a few along the edges that look a little more alert, and one of them is looking at a little occasionally

down into the quarry, just keeping an eye on the established area. Which one looks like the newest? The newest of the bunch would be the one that's on the far left that's looking down into the quarry as well. He is shaved head, a small kind of brownish beard that looks like he's just starting to grow it out into a nice long tub other, it got shaved

in some, I don't know, a terrible college dwarf actor. You know, part of his entry to a... Right. Dwarf girl. Dwarf Gertrity. Dwar Sigma, Sigma. Yeah. It's a fairly thick tuft of unkept brown beer that goes about that far out. It's just certainly pulled into like a tiny little scruffy braid.

It's not quite there and he probably gets a lot of shit for it from the other dwarf. Right. But he seems generally like, looking at you guys, like, work your magic. Do you think? No, well, I was just, what are we trying to do? Well, we brought this gift. Hello, and we just kind of address all of them maybe right now, yes? She's about her in this, I'm just going to let her do this.

Hello, hello, hi. Hello, hi. Greetings and salutations. The other, the guards, I can reach back about their weapons and the one that wouldn't be kind of a kind of neck. Oh. I look over at the shaved head one and I kind of hold his gates for a little bit. I get vexed little put forward.

Pardonly, Matt. Yet. All right, what's your business? Oh, yes. Well, we're here to speak with Nostock. We brought a gift for him that's quite remarkable, actually. They kind of curl up around the apparent barrel that Grog's holding. They look wary of Grog once they make no order the barrel. They all kind of... Oh.

Brut, pissed a shit. I have not seen to actually drink it. There's been long-standing rumors of this evening existed. It exists. And it's for Nostock. This is a ballad this original? Yes. Sign by himself, I see on the burn and blazing wood.

I'll go talk to him. Any heads inside of the building. The doors closed behind the other guards kind of encroach, keeping a very keen eye, each one having a deed on the rest of your group. About two minutes past before he comes back in the door, but Nostok will see you briefly, but you best bring the gate. I think that's warning his interest. Wonderful. Inside, please.

And he and one other guard kind of flank you guys as you enter, making sure that you're not left without that appearance. As you're led into the center of this portion of the mine's main structure, series of long hallways. You can see there's just this general smell of soot and ash and broken stone dust in the air. A hint of brimstoneish kind of a smell.

It's not very pleasant, it's very well-worn and pungent for those of you who have been most of the time As you enter, there is kind of general dust in the air, with a little bit of light seems to peek through from the torches. The torch sconces that are placed along the wall, you can see kind of this general haze amongst the interior here.

It's definitely a work environment at the base of an underground Dwarven establishment used to mine. Right. You're led further down the hallway, it curves to the left, and you're brought into a large dwarven study. You can see with books lying in the walls. There are a series of ledgers and paper stacks

on a large desk, and in the center there sits a dwarf a dwarf with fiery red hair, cut very short, almost in a buzz cut on top, with a long, long, long beard that is not braided, but just kept very smooth and very, not curly, not bunched, it's a very straight beard. He's very clean cut. He already has this kind of intimidating dark glare to him, and as you walk in the room, he goes, okay, you brought me a drink, you have my attention. What brings you to the minds? We should have, we have several of them. things actually, several things bring us to the mind. My name of course is Percibel Fredrik Steinland, Nusel Kowalski, the Rother of the third. You can call him Percy.

The reason is his finger as, you have not paid for me in Pleasantries yet. Oh, of course, of course. Grog, if you would. Tap that motherfucker. You do, okay, you put it for him. I'm just to make you have a goblet on the table. As you pull it up, he pulls under his desk and pulls up a desk and pulls up a God, but immediately as you fill it, top it off. Thank you. Put it at the side of the disc. Wait. Mr. Gray's spine. Oh, okay. Sit down. All right. Is it as amazing as we could?

It takes another long drag. Just making sure you all watch him do this. Like this goes on probably a little longer. The pageantry of him drinking this in front of you is definitely kind of a power point. He's establishing. some sort of kind of unspoken dominance in the room. Eventually finishes his tankard, sets it down under the desk again. Right. Look, there are a lot of celebrity interview podcasts out there, but there's only one happy, sad, confused. I'm Josh Horowitz, and yeah, I'm the host of the show,

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So, where were we? We were here to call upon your expertise. We imagine that we are not the first strangers to Craghammer to come through... In the last few weeks. In the last few weeks. We believe one of our compatriots had some dealings with you, perhaps not as pleasant as the dealings we are hoping to have. A lady.

in fact. A half thing. At which point, as you say that, he kind of gives his grin to his face and he goes, I know the one we speak. Yes. She's a strong-headed on that one.

Yes. She's stepped on a few toes around this place. Oh, is she clumsy? One can say that, aye. You say you're a complete suite of hers. We're here to mend any broken bridges. so to speak.

Or broken toes. If you will. Well, go out. She certainly left a missing. This a strange vision quest she kept talking about, brought her into atmospheres. Portions of this city, portions of my business that she has no right

trespassing on. She went against carmerels. She broke away from partial arrest, and she went screaming down into the caverns of our line. Without my permission, blades were on on some crazy suicide mission. You know what?

We'll go after her. We'll bring her out. We'll get her out of your minds. Great. I like that, actually. Good. And we'd be happy to clear out anything unpleasant that we happen to find in there in the meantime. How did she look? Hmm? She was, she seemed to have some weight to her. She was a... So not a looker, there's what you're saying. She would... You see the strange look, and I would not discuss the physical.

The Dwarves of twenty seven. You're a feminist. How much would this task be worth to you? Obviously we're doing you quite a favor and we brought you quite a gift. This cost us a thousand gold. It obviously is last night. No, no, no, but I know she's probably wreaking havoc on your mind. We've come to correct the wrongs that she's done.

and come to bring her home. It also sounds like there are some other terrible things wreaking havoc on your mind. There's nothing going on. We're fine. We're everything in the control. We don't need your help for that. If you want to find your friend, go find her. Well, you know, that's alive.

Not taking a corpse back. It's not helped, sir. Simply respecting you as a businessman. And as a businessman, I'm sure that you would disagree with unceremonious charity, whether it would be to give it or receive it. We are making sure that our dealings with you are fair and balanced. I appreciate your offering. You've brought your time. Now if you're here to go find your friend, I'll let you pass. You may pass into the mine, but if at any moment you cross over

it, any sort of thief, they go bullshit, looks over at you. I recommend that you fall down the same path of your friend. like we did, and it killed real quick. I don't take Culling to those across my business. I doubt we could find anything more value than what we've already brought to. We're here to write wrongs, and we promise you our business is finding her and returning home. Is that our business?

Yeah, we're here to write rooms and right left. And write comment cards. Wait, before we like dive into this mountain, I mean, we know there's like ghouls and God knows what else out there, shouldn't we find out? Yes, we should. Maybe some arcane house could tell us how to do with these things. Yes, yes, yes, yes. Do we have permission to enter it? Within the next few days, obviously we might need to be prepared.

Yes, do we have like badges? Like we wear them over so they know what... I'll speak with a minute. I let you down. And if you come back, make good on you. I'm good on you. I think I'm a business eater's done.

Yeah. Very good. At which point you hear muffled in the distance, a loud ringing, with a very loud bell. D-l-de-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-dh. At which point, you kind of perks up a bit. A business-eer-st-on. Please, shove off. Which way do we go? It looks over at the two other guards that are out front.

The two harvests come in this way. While he's talking, I take a flat. out my cloak and approach the barrel and surreptitiously pour a little bit into the... Oh, Jesus, you're stealing beer? No, no, no, because we have to be doing this. While he's doing that, I try to distract him. Can I just get to him?

Roll. Good old Nostok while he's doing that? He currently does not seem to talk about the talk about the time at the moment. I'm going to make a fumble. I'm going to attempt to assist the side of hand with a bit of a fumble. He's already rolled it. Damn it, I'm gonna fall down in front of Nostock. Oh!

13. I'm gonna fall down in front of Nostok. Come on. He's distracted by a bell. Come on. As you fill your flask. Oh, this is fast. You hear this loud.

Oh, my ankle. Oh, Jesus. So very much. This is the first time you've witnessed the pristine, delicate, yet well-trained palm of a dwarven hand goes straight to its forehead. I carry the flask over to his cup and refill it and say, in my kingdom, when a deal is set, we drink together, and I would like, not much, but just to pour us all a drink can agree on the top. Surely this cask is weeks' worth of drink. Get out.

Oh my. Let's just go. Just take a blast. I take a blast. I can see that it's a cultural difference. I'm going. Stop it. Just go. What are you doing? You all want to talk. I'm on the earring. At which point a second and the third Dall start going off and the guards that are waiting for you guys are like, Where she goes? They start leading you outside, and as you make your way outside of the main building, you can now hear voices shouting down in the quarry below.

I lean down to one of the guards with us and say, what is that bell for? Something's flushing out of the quarry. Flushing, what is that? Oh, a poop. We don't know. At which point, some of the guards are kind of motioning each other to follow, and some of them start going down one of the tracks that leads down into the nearest quarry below. Let's go with this. I'm going to just try.

and like practically usher our guards in that direction, since they seem like they want to go that direction. Let's just see if we can push them in that direction. Are the other workers? Okay, you guys follow down towards the quarry. You asked the guard that question. He goes, I don't know, we've had quite a few interesting things come through these past few weeks.

Like what? Like what? You already said. And you kind of like swallel's talking. Things I can't describe. Well, we can certainly help. Lead on. Are you going?

Is there anybody running out? Not yet. As you head halfway down, the quarry walk away, you begin seeing dwarfs start running out of one of the large quarry tunnels. I grab one of them. Well, they're quite a distance from you. You're still walking down the side. They're about a good 100 feet from you. They start running out, you can see blood streaking down one of those faces.

Yes. They're charging out. One of those has a weapon is limping, and you start seeing small, green, scampering things rushing through. One, two, three, four, six, ten goblins come rushing out of the center. Oh, shit. We should attack them. I string my bow. I don't you have family histories?

All right, the three dwarfs that were running out, one of them gets hacked down by one of the goblags that jumped on. Who is like... Take a shot, right down. I take a shot. I shoot it. Okay, both of you guys roll a dagger. You throw a dagger. Three of you, roll for attack.

I'm gonna... 19. Uh... 15. Is there a clear area where there's just a bunch of gobbling running? There is an open, almost like a funnel towards the tunnel. I'm going to throw a little fireball right there. Right there.

Where those guys are. So you guys, you all hit from this distance because the goblins are few little things. They're still a little small to see, but you're all pretty well trained and pretty hundred your aim. You fire, simultaneously, gunshot. That comes through the hallway. Aeros flying dagger. You see three goblins just fall off the nearby dwarf.

He goes, thank! At which point a large fireball explodes, killing off about 10 or so of the goblins and probably two of the dwarves. I'm sorry about that. At which point the guards kind of stopped. Did you do that? Yeah. Fuck.

And they start going on, they see you pulling out your weapons, and they all kind of take a step back and realize that they don't want to die either. Well, go if you're going to help, go! Run straight in. Yeah. Did you guys go charging in, you can now see a handful of more gollins are rushing out. They're running really fast. I throw entangle up.

Okay. Entangle, she begins to... Like in the distance, wherever they're coming from. Okay, what's the radius in that? Like 100 feet. That's the range. What's the radius? Oh, 20 foot radius.

20 foot radius? Okay. So you find a portion of the central point where things exit from the tunnel, and you see these strange kind of reddish vines begin to protrude and begin to grab me by goblins with their pull up in this mass of weird vine creatures. At which point you hear, you can now see two larger ogre-like creatures come storming out. Oh, shit. Yes. All right. Everyone rolling.

Yeah! Oh, fuck. God damn it. Oh, fuck. God damn it. Oh, yeah. Take it. All right.

Do we have initiatives 25 to 20? 27. Oh, I have to roll. Wait, wait, wait. I don't know where my name. You rolled in 20? I rolled a 20 plus seven. Okay, 21, you said?

I have 21. 21 for Tiberius, but you did? One. Oh, all. Where's my... Oh, I rolled it two. It's six and six with a plus. Fellows, I don't like goblins.

18. No. I'm not. It's usually a jogerous. What do you know? I don't like goblin. Is there anything that you know? No.

Did we see a fact choice? They will all die. Don't spare any of them. Probably that. All right. 18. 18. All right, so we have...

182. All right, so we have 27. 27. What? I have 27 initiative. 15 to 10? 10 to 5. 6.

Wow. Oh my god. I got a 3. See, you didn't do. Four. Okay, so we have Max. We are ready.

I have, to be fair, I just cast entangle. It kind of works. I'm distracted holding a entangle. to hold against hangar. All right, so, build this amaz in placement here. As your bear is currently back at the inn. He is still? Unless we wanted to bring him along.

I thought we brought him alone. I don't know him. I shouldn't have mentioned that. All right, we'll say about mine. Okay. That's fine. Sorry, I shouldn't, I should emphasize that one now. Okay.

That's all right. So, those of you who are going first, we're going to keep you on the field here. A number of goblins that are currently held. Oh, shit, works. Over here. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven. Eight, nine, ten. Doseumont.

Giants. Oghurs or? All righty. So, top of the round, Percy, you're up. I'm sitting down and I'm busting out bad news. Bust out bad news. Okay. Percy stops kind of part, you know, just as he gets to the quarry,

a little bit elevated, and he pulls out from the small sack on his back. this large elongated contraption, this weird construction that looks similar to the pepperbox usually carries, but much larger and cumbersome. He sets it up on the ground with a small stand at the front and preps itself as a visual point. Oger. Oger back here? Yep. All right, go ahead and roll for your attack with bad news. Have you used this before? Nope, first time. No, I've been doing it. Crack it out.

His own tinkered construction, bad news. That's a 20-30 attack against this. Yep. That'll do it. Go ahead and roll damage. All right. Does that critical for you? 19 actually might. Natural 19?

Yeah, that's your critical for you. That does critical. That's awesome. I'm never critical with this either. What does that mean? That means the damage dice you double. So go for damage, double that, and then add your modifier after that.

Come on, come, come, come, big money, no whamaze, yeah. Yeah. 11, 22, 23, 24, 5, 5, 6, 27 points of damage. Dumbled? Is that in the Mets doubled? That's doubled. All right? So, you guys see this cacophonous, this large blasting sound, and a flashing kind of blue energy

and spark shoot out the back of the weapon. It actually lifts Percy off the ground for a second, and he catches himself in the sheer blast. This streaking, this heated bullet, almost like reddish, white, hot, just cascading through the air, plunges into the side of the ober's shoulder, with a smattering of blood, splattering against the cave behind it. It's actually moved back a step and has to keep in something. Slams this clover to the ground. That ends your turn?

I can't do anything after that. Hell ya! I'm curious, you're up. I move within 60 feet of those big fat nose. Fettner's travels far and fast. Oh shit. Oh shit. That this is the entanglement.

Oh, okay. Right before there. So everything there is kind of fighting from the entanglement. Most of these gobbels are currently neck-outous. I'm going to shoot a scorching ray at the big guys. They will. You moved within 60 feet of them. So you moved up to here?

All right. And they're all entangled, yeah? That's good right there. That'll work? They still have entangled. These guys are entangled. These front gobbles are not. Scorching Ray, you said at which one?

Actually, oh, there's a bunch of those dudes aren't there. I'm going to, no, I'm going to do a fireball instead. Right in the center of the juiciness, where I can get a couple little guys and both of the big guys. So I'd say probably about there would be where you want it. I'm going to do that, and I'm going to spend two sorts points immediately to do quickening spell and do another spell right after that. Okay, so as you rush up, you pull back your hand and you see the arc energy

we begin to flow with in your palm, you then throw the beam out that kind of arcs, slands in the center, and explodes hitting each of these five goblins and the two ogres. What's your DC on your spell? My DC on my spell is... Top of your spell page on the right. Oh, wait. Oh, 17, sorry. 17, okay.

The two ogres actually make their saving throws. Oh, what? What? 18 and 18. Roll crap, your ogres. The goblins, however, all just, like, there's no way they're going to survive the damage you can. Yeah, they just, you see this like, kind of a red ash mist go where they once were, and they're all turned to black nothings. However, roll damage for the overs, they get half damage because they made their half stage, so 8d6 damage.

8d6. That... Eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, fifteen, fifteen, sixteen, seventeen, eighteen, twenty one, twenty, twenty, two, twenty, two, three, five, two, six, twenty seven. What? Seven, all right, so half that's already going. Thanks, should be killed. Okay, so as the blast of fire dissipates, you can see one of the ober's is now burnt on half of his chest, looking a little rough, there's blood streaking down from the side of his face, one of the pieces of the shrapnel that got thrown at him.

And the other overs are looking okay. He's a large creature, isn't he? I'm going to use my second spell and do telekinesis and pick one up and try to hurl them into the other one. Okay. Whoa. Which one is the one left here? The one that's beaten up already.

I'm hard right now. That's a feeling free. That's just your blue. Yes. I'll send them into that. Right. All right. Strangely, for us.

That ogre is not prone by the impact. Yeah. The other one is also not. Not prone. Yes! Swf! Then the wall, both of them, slammed to the ground. And my vines, I make sure my vines really grapple them.

I turn to Grog. They're all yours, buddy. Go ahead and roll 2D6 impact damage. Oh, sweet. No, you can't. 10. 10 damage to Easton? Yeah.

All right. Both oaks and out of the ground, kind of reeling from the impact. That brings us to Grog and Vex going simultaneously. Yes. Ladies, good. Oh, well, all right. I'm going to cast Hunter's Mark.

on the most damaged one. Okay, that'll be this one here. Alright. And then I'm going to shoot Lightning Arrow. Okay, do you want to move a little closer? Yes, I do. Alright.

So we'll get one. D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D. Six, we'll put you about there. All right, cool. I'm going to shoot lightning arrow at them. Okay, so you pull out your arrow. As you pull it back, a little bit of energy, courses through your fingers, strikes through the arrow.

You can now see this crackling energy as you're pulling it taught in your bow. All right. You let it loose, go and roll for attack. Okay. Um, 21. 21 hits. All right. And then I do something else, 1D8, right?

Yeah, you do the damage of the arrow plus the damage of the skull. Holy moly. So that's this. 13 for the arrow, and then 4D8 for the spell. Spout. Eight. Four, twelve, plus three, fifteen. Seventeen. Seventeen. Okay. The ogre that's been beaten and blasted by the fireball, it's getting up, grabs its club and begins to get up on one leg as the lighting arrow slams into its chest. You can see it hits, it looks down for a second, and then the charge pulses through its entire torso as it does. It screams out, Into the cavern, its whole muscle system locks tight and it falls forward again onto its chest, smoke rising off of its whole upper area, unloading on the ground.

Come on now. And then the other one, which takes 2D8 if he fails the saving thing. Which, with a one he does. Yes! When he fails, it's so good. So go ahead and roll damage for the second, for the rover. Two, ten. 10 damage, nice.

So as he falls to the ground, the arcs over the other one who drops his club for second, picks it up angrily. Which I can reassign my hunter's mark to him now. You can? Yes. All right. That brings us to...

Oh, my hunter's mark! I didn't do my hunter's mark damage. But it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. You kill them. All right. He is so dead. Oh my god.

The poker is done. All right, so the other other one is angry. It's angry, it's not the goblins turn. Okay. These goblins rush up. They are just dashed forward. They aren't so dead. These ones around.

Just like. And this one around. This, oh, it's his turn. Like one of those rubber goblins? No attacks. Every make an inside check. Insights check? What happened?

Is that a 20? What are we doing this? I'd be 20. I literally get a 1. Oh my God. Natural 20. I like that, side-jacks. 20 total.

20. Four. Natural one. I'm really not paying attention. You're dealing with the fact that you just fired your gun for the first time, and it kind of burned your hands a little. Like, ah. Grog.

Grog. Resides poetry. He's familiar with one thing. Fear in the eyes of his enemies. Looking at these goblins, they're not charging to attack. The attacks seem to be instinctual. they are running. They are scared. They are fleeing from something. Oh shit. Oh, shit. Oh, no. No. No. Something's

big. Oh, no. Oh, no. May I make a request that you kill them anyway? It's like playing croquet at this point of yes. Go on. Go on to rage. And I would like to move to the right of all those stinky goblings. Right over here? more to the right, yeah, a little more, keep going, on the way, flanking, yeah, yeah. And then I would like to give them the cleanest shave possible.

All right, go ahead and roll for attack on the first one. Oh yeah, that's a good one. Yeah. That's 26. That definitively hits. Go ahead and roll damage. Oh, damn, crap. Decapitation.

Two plus the other, four, four, three. 13? No, it's more. 13? Okay? Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. So as you rush up, you bring your axe into the first goblin to your right, clean.

You don't even feel resistance. Hey! You hear this little sound as it's bicepid in the second. Oh, that was cute. It's head and upper torso just rolling off of the side before rolling to a stop. However, the inertia of your axe still kinks through to the one of the other side of you. Go ahead and roll for your second attack on that. 21.

That also hits, go and roll damage. 4 plus 8 plus 7. Eight plus seven is um, 15. As you cleave through the first goblin, you swing around another goblin, looks up at you scared, and pulls a dagger out with its gnarled tongue, at which point the axe invents itself straight into its face. Its angry face goes, and just fall slack against your blade.

You lift backward, it's stuck to the edge of your axe, limply dangling against, it kind of shake it off a little bit. Double prizes, yeah. Uh, great, that ends your turn. You don't have anything in range, so you can use your bonus action for a third attack if you wanted to do a frenzy action, but you don't need to. That brings us now to the ogre's turn.

The ogre gets up, see if it makes it saving throw. Or it tends to drag it out. It does an 18. However, the ogre speeds 50 feet. 40 gets about that far. He's going to make a double move. Double move. He's running.

He's still having tangled up. He managed to resist it. He was on the ogre trial. He was a big ogre. Big ogre is just going to go. All right, the ogre takes its full turn to get up in the meal in with you guys. It does not have its attack over to use its full time to get there. Once again, the ogre you see this lumbering forward.

It also has this kind of look at its eye of desperation. Oh, crap. We should just let it pass. Now it is Vax's go. My sister's right in the face of the over, correct? Correct. Excellent. So I'm going to take a run towards my sister. I need it from big eyes.

And since she's right close to him, he's distracted. So I'm going to turn just as I get to her. So my back presses against hers and swing around and sneak attack two daggers up into the bag. We've practiced their side turn. All right. So as you dodge up the side, just this blur of shadow and speed, you just coast up the side of your sister. Dagger's both plunge towards the side of the ogre. Go ahead and roll for a attack. All right.

One. And then with mine. It's a one. The other one I do a poison dagger gets a 20. Oh, what did that? Oh, shit! All right. That is dagger of venom, one D, four.

Four, three, plus two is five. Now, does the sneak attack damage go on there? Yeah, it does, because you have another ally Jason to it. You don't get advantage in the attack roll, but you can sort of the sneak attack. Critical hit, too, as well, correct? Yeah, yeah, you can multiply the sneak attack damage. So five plus, no, the double goes to the sneak attack area?

It does. The modifier zone double, but any dice you roll a double. Nine. In Mike. 15, so 30 plus five, 35. Yeah. Plus poison. Your little...

The poison's not going to factor in. You swing past her. Both blades jam right into the side of its rib cage. You hear it howl out in pain. As it does, you twist the daggers in a way where both blades are now going in two different directions, and you carve out a section of its entire abdomen. As you do, the flesh, almost like whale blubber, just slops off the side of it. Organs spill out intestines, and it kind of looks down and tries to pull them back in.

back in, at which point you can see like the color drainer from its face, you just kind of lean up and kick it down. The over, falls to the ground, lifeless, destroyed. It's enough time to regret everything that has ever happened. Yes. All right, that brings us to Keeliff. I have a called mom enough. Oh, and there are these, are there two goblets left?

There are two goblins left. Okay, Keeleth, I do a quick kind of sprint jog up kind of towards grog and go, boom, and bring up a big stone wall right where that entrance is. Right here? No, like where things are pouring out. Yeah.

All right, walled stone. Wall stone, boom. All right. A giant walled stone now completely seals off. Stop! We don't know what's in there. We should talk about this for a second, and I bought us some time.

I'm sure it's gonna try and beat through that door in a second. I'm going to say that you move up there with your movement. Oh, no. All right. I'd say probably over here, not right next, we've got one, but I'll give you enough range. Okay.

So the wall still. Are there any guards around still, any dwarven guards? They're all just kind of watching you do this now. It's just weird moment where they don't want to put their lives at risk and you guys need to be intent on getting them this battle, so they're just going to sit back and let you. I throw up my wall and I turn around and I say, what's coming?

Tell us you know what's coming, what's coming. Make an intimidation. You're gonna do you. I'm not good at this. Oh, poor. Oh, poor. Make a pity roll. A very gentle attempt at intimidation.

However, the events gets crossed. The guards kind of look at you. I say we're about to die. It is in your best interest to tell us. They're like, we don't know. It's been different things, strange abominations. It's hard to describe or put together. Some things make you things down there.

Something's, what kind of things? From where? And they all kind of, are talking to a hero, against the stone. Let's see on that situation. Sitting down. Do I bring out my blade? The stone cracks, you can see an odd,

you can see a noticeable crack in an audible. I'm running right now diagonally. I cast stone skin on my... Oh, oh, good call. I do the same thing on the other side. Okay, so come over here. Yeah. You're all so fancy.

I cast stone skin on myself. Okay. So we're stealthing. We're stealthing. Both of you? How tall are the walls, I mean the ceiling? Oh, the ceiling right now is the rest of craghammer for the most part. 100 is in hundred.

Yeah, it is. Huge ceiling. What's in the middle? I get within casting rates. These are brazers. That's fine right there. By the way, stone skin goes, this disappears. Your entanglement?

Yeah. You can wait. Yeah. But these are some mine carts, random rocks. There's a smashed cart over here from the overbarrel through. This is just a piece of stone that raises about 15 feet. And these are both braziers for light in the center of the area. So, yeah, it's hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of feet up.

You can look up at the very top of crackhammer from here. Okay. Wow. That's fine. That's what you got? Well, let's see. So, Keylet's your turn, Stone Skin. And you move up?

Anywhere else you want to go? I mean, right now we're intent. Not in combat. We're out of combat. Yeah, we're out of combat. Briefly. We're waiting. We're waiting.

We're waiting to take aim at the wall, resetting everything. Okay. Can I move up behind that pillar? You move behind the pillar? Yeah. Okay. I'm staying far back at the moment. So back here.

Yeah. Okay. Both of these goblins, I'll just say you guys end up just taking them out. I guess not even in the question. They just, you step on them and crush them. Are there any dwarves that we can say to go get ball sack and bring them down? Oh, yeah. You can't.

Balgos. Balgis? You just tell like, give Bogus! And they're like, grab balls back. Who? Really? Some of them have crossbows set up, by the way. You can see some of them now are barreling down to get ready to fire whatever is going to come through.

Another crack of the wall, you see the dust settle as the stone cracks again, a large piece at the top tumbles off. The stone wall is probably not going to hold another impact. Anyone else want to move anywhere? Just taking aim. I'll move up to the right near where Grog is. And can I, no one's taking any. No one's taking any damage yet, right? No.

No, you guys have a pretty clean sweep into this battle so far. I can't inspire anybody here now. You can inspire anyone. Can I inspire everyone? You can spend all your uses to inspire as many people as you have the uses of it, so. I still have mine that I haven't used yet. I'll inspire Vex and Vax and Grog. So Mark that you guys all have a...

I think you're really handsome and nice. We all have a... You're going to have inspiration. D. I thought you were going to have a little, I know, some beautiful song for us. Working on. Working on.

All of us, we all get to be able. All each of you has to have a single D8 dice. It's an inspiration dice that kind of, you know, the barter conspiration is flown through you that you can use to add to an attack roll. That's my, this is my barred. You can add it to an attack roll, a saving throw. Yeah. Yeah.

There you go. That's what charm sounds like. Yeah. Apparently. So you can use an attack roll, a saving throw, or a ability check. ability check. Okay. They have a skill. All right, so, DeBereas, can you stay where you are, you're moving where? Last chance. Is that cover right there next to me? Right over here, yeah. Yeah, I'll get behind the cover.

Okay, I can pick out and I'm gonna cast blare. Okay, stone's skin goes away. No, I can't do both? No, no, no, there's both concentration spells. Okay, I leave Stone skin. Okay, I leave Stone's gonna stay sound. Great. All right, so at which point, boom! The stone breaks through, scattering across the ground. you see immediately cruising through. What the fuck is that? What is it? A bulbous oversized Naga-like creature.

You've encountered a Naga before, which is a... A Naga? A large serpentine creature with a humanoid head. However, this one is swollen. It is bulbous. The way it moves looks unnatural, and it has a fix to it. Not one, not three,

but five other different colored Naga heads that look to be stitched to its body. It is a seriously terrible abominate. horrible abomination as it just breaks through the stone. All the heads rear back. Do you know like your heads do something if you look at them? We're beginning back to the top of the initiative order? Oh, shit!

Wait, wait, wait, I got a question. My hunter's mark, can I transfer to that thing or do I have to be? Correct, you can't, yes. Because it's still part of the encounter, which is not a meeting a battle for that. So that is now marked to the hunter's mark. Percy, you're up first. Do I have to take new aim or can I have myself already trained on the rain? You've had a moment to train, you haven't seen the creature until it just burst out,

so it would take you around it. I'm taking my round to aim. Okay, so you're aiming. That brings us to Tiberius. Um. Oh, we're not rolling. What did you see? We did.

I just took aim. Did you get an initial? I'm getting the same. Same. A gun. Just a gun. Okay. Take a time.

Having been having been caught. Just a gun. This gun doesn't do anything fancy. So there's shoot up really far, really hard. Okay. I'll do scorching ray. Don't. Scorching ray.

All right. Yeah. Say we throw out. Hizzen. Not. Rolls a two. So full damage on it? So two, four, let's shoot two of them right now, right?

Or three of them. Is it an aimed ray attack? Yeah. You have to roll through the attack. Oh. So roll D20 and add your... Roll high, roll-h-d-d-d-d-d-d-dd-. Top-bechall page.

What? What? What's that? What's that? 23. 23? Yes. Okay.

All right. And then that's 2-D6. That's 12. 12th once damage to the Naga. All right. That brings this to... Wait. I'll roll for the second shot, right?

Yeah. Okay. And that's a natural 20. Oh! Okay. So you fire one, meanwhile. It slams into the side of where the Naga heads. The second one, you bring back, and as you do, there's a flicker of arcane, and instability.

His arm shakes as he releases the surge of scorching energy as it blasts into the side of the Naga. Also, does not make it save me through again? Roll full damage and double it. Yes. Yes, Ted Rieries. Oh, my God. 12? 12?

Yeah. Multiply? Or you roll 12. 12 times 2, 24 points of damage. Oh. Tablet math. Good way, man. Here's a critical day.

Stand school, kids. All right. Just blast in the cycle and not get hands. It's a good time to note our charity, 826 L. Not yet. To date. Donate. Next week.

Next week. You can donate to that. All right. So that brings us. At the end, Tiberius's turn. You want to move it all you saying where you are? All right, we're on the back, you're up. Oh, me!

Okay, I'm gonna shoot, oh God, I didn't realize I was going so fast. What did you roll from the way? I'm just gonna roll a, what? What? Oh, I rolled a, oh, I rolled a 20 for stealth. Oh, yeah. He has no idea with it. Sweet.

Did you see the bear? Okay, Trinette's gonna hang out because I don't want to, you know. I'm going to shoot conjure barrage. No, I'm just gonna, I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I'm going to shoot him twice. All right, go for it. All right. Arrow once, Erex-EFLis style.

But I am going to do the fire arrow thing yet. Okay, so using your bowstring. Yeah, the blazing bowstring, thank you, Tiberius. Did he create it and crafted? All right, so as you pulled the second arrow out, you knock it, as you let it go, it burst into flames, arcing halfway through the air. Okay. What was your hit roll now?

The 21. Twenty-one. Yes. Okay. Oh, that's a four plus seven. Don't forget your inspiration. What's inspiration dice is for to hit. Oh, okay.

11. So 11 points of damage. For the first one, plus for the blazing bowstring, I can turn any arrow into a flaming area doing additional 10 fire damage. So I'll roll that right now. There you go. Which is this.

Which is a seven. So additional seven, so 18 total damage in that arrow in the center of its body. One of the serpentant heads, re-urls back from the pain, begin snatching it where the arrow's not protruding from it, trying to break it off. And then I'm gonna roll again.

That's a 24. That hits, go ahead and all damage. Awesome. That's an eight. Grog, you're on deck. Seven plus seven is 14. 14 damage, all right. Both arrows sink into it.

Definitely kind of piercing through the scales a little bit, but not sinking too deeply in its body. It's definitely a hearty creature. Grog, you're up. I would like to run around the other side of the rock. raging spit flying out of my mouth. And I would like to use the chain of returning, also crafted by Tiberius,

attach it to the end of the great axe, and throw it from where I am at the snake. Okay, so he was running around, rears back, and takes his double-handed great ice, and just lobs it over hand, the chain that's wrapped around your wrist, keeping it attached to you in some degree. Go ahead and roll for the attack.

No, 17. 17? Can I? Just hits. Yeah. That is 15. 15 points of damage. As the axe embeds itself pretty deeply into the torso.

Oh, I didn't do the hunter's mark. Roll 100s mark damage, not. Thank you, thank you, chat room. Six. Six. Six, awesome. All right. This is an athletic strength to go hard to pull the weapon.

I missed you, it was, but thank you. I like this. Go ahead and roll. Robber and down. Roll. 12. No, you roll a 20. Oh, you're right.

DC 12. Let a little bit from the phone. Shit, balls taint, five. Plus. Plus what? Plus your athletics. Oh, oh, that's bound to be good. Seven, it's 12.

12 is the DC. So yeah. You pull back the chain. The blade is resisting. It's stuck in the close, and it's it's just barely catch it. I love your joy sounds. Sounds.

You're not to do that. Now it's turn. Oh no. Oh no. Yeah, yeah. Come on. Oh, shit. Why me?

No. For its size, when it moves, it moves in a burst of lightning energy. It almost is too fast for its corpulent form. As it goes behind to Kieleth and Tiberius, it makes an attack with each of its five heads. Two on Tiberius, three. on Tiberius, three on Keyleth. Remember you guys have stoneskins, I believe you have resistance against damage, right? Oh, yes, I do. All right, so against Keyleth, it's a natural 20.

Oh, no. It's a 12 plus seven. It's going to be a 19 to hit. Uh, yeah. And natural 20, you can... Oh, wow! What is this bullshit? What is this bullshit? I know Tiberius, that's a 22 to hit, and a 13 to hit. 13 hits.

One does, one does not. Okay, cool. So against Keeliff, you take... God Cat, Stone Skin. I know. So you take half damage to these, which is fine. Yeah. That's that 2 plus 4.

It's 6 damage half. You take 3,000, 2, because if it's critical, that would put you... So you take 6 damage from the first strike. That's nothing. Six damage. Not too bad. You take 7 damage from the second strike. Okay.

And another 6 damage from the third strike. Oh, actually, it would have been 6 damage Six, four, and six, because you have resistance in the damage because of the Stublescape. Six, four, and six. Yes. However, make a constitution saving throw. Oh, oh.

Venom from the fangs of the dog to pulse into your bloodstream. I thought you did. Resistance. He talked to me out of it. What are my constitution is different? Yeah, constitution saving throw. Oh.

I know, we do. Fuck. Oh, natural one. Oh my goodness. Natural one on the constant. Oh, no. You feel this burning. It's a bad day.

Burning pain pulse into your bloodstream as your whole body doubles over from the pain. Oh, Caleb. You suffer 31 points of poison damage. Oh, 31 on top of the six, four, and six. Yep. Are you okay? Poison damage is not happened.

Is heelike unconscious? No, she's okay. No, she's okay. She's okay. She's not entering any more. Tiberius, you take 13 points. of damage half by stone skin, so you take a total of seven. Seven, forty.

And also make Constitution saving throw. That's what you got. Sixteen. Sixteen? You managed to physically resist the poison in your system. You feel that sway tinge, the muscles tense, but then your dragon-born form against to just shrug off the effect of the venom.

Can I turn to him and blow fire out of my nostrils? Sure. That's what I do. It wears off in its face. True dragon board challenge. That brings us to Vax. Okay. I start jogging backwards.

Back one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Can I sneak attack while throwing? Don't get too close. You're stealthed currently, so you would technically get a sneak attack, but you have to be in melee if you get the other bar. So what would sneak attack for this damage if you were to roll? Or if you were to throw a dagger at it?

You would get a sneak attack. Okay, so that means just one throw instead of two? You can throw both daggers. I feel so inspired by Scanlan's barding. Yeah! You can add it after you make the roll by the other way. So if you do a really good one, Good roll, then you don't need it.

Okay, 19 plus 11 is 30. And because you're a rogue's doesn't you get a, is that a critical for you? Yeah. Yeah. Oh yeah. Two critical. Yes.

Yes. One one, the other one is a 16 plus 26. That also hits. Yes. You chucked both daggers out. They both kind of arc around from the very one. You used to throw it around. Yeah.

And I meant to say, I was aiming at its eye, the main No, you should have that. Sorry. All right, wherever it is. Where it is. Four. Plus seven is 11 plus five.

That's really funny. All right, 11, 17, 18, 20, 20 times 40 plus four. No. That's the first tag. Yeah, 44 damage. Forty-four. No.

Rogues, man. Help me. What? Really? How'd? That's just one? That's just one, four, plus two is six. Does that sneak attack?

No. No, he only wants to take attack for a turn. Okay. 40 and then six on the other one. So one actually hits one of the various Naga heads directly into its face. As it does, it goes through both eyes and you can see it, it's just reeling from the attack. It's looking pretty rough actually. Oh.

The physical form, you can see the stitches beginning to come apart at some of the seams. scenes, you could see kind of a black, icorish liquid kind of spill out from some of the suture marks. And just a reminder, the daggers, folks, blink back to the belt on my waist. Yes. Because it's magic. Magic.

Magic, that's one. All right, somebody comes shut off. Who's true as it is. Kill it. Kill it. Okay, so I'm really upset. It's really hurting. I'm rolling away.

So out of anger, I take my staff, and I go, bam, and I crack, and I do thunder wave, pushing him back 15 feet. All right. He's almost dead. He's pushed back. He just takes damage. It's half damage.

Okay, 2D8. So one, two. Yeah, as you're setting up your gun, it gets slammed right point blank to you. Oh, sorry. It takes four damage. Four damage, already. And then I'm going to turn into an eagle. Okay.

As one does. So we'll say for now, sure. We forgot to bring an eagle. Secaw, so go. So I got to bring an eagle. And I fly away. Away. Away.

Away. Bye, bye, why. Where are you going? Oh, poor damage. Tell us. Tell our story, Keel. That's pretty great. And then I cry in the corner and rock back and forth a little bit.

And that's my turn. I forgot I measured you have to make half-dage from the venom, so you would still take in 14 points of points of damage. Oh, so just mark that. It is half damage on a save. All right, so that brings us to Scanlan. Can I, bonus, inspire myself?

Can I? Because you're Scanlan, I'll say yes. I don't know. You have such a high opinion of yourself that even you can inspire yourself in this. So yes, why not? It would help me to acquire some dice to experience. inspire. Okay, so I inspire myself. First, I move five feet back so I'm on the same row as him.

There? No, not that five. Yes. There. And then I'm going to cast lightning bolt at him. Yes! Okay. Straight line that way? Straight line that way. All right. So you don't have to roll a hit, you just roll damage on that. Oh, I didn't even need to inspire. What's your DC on the spell? Top of your spell list. Yeah, geez. 17. Thank you. 17. That's a failure on a saving throw.

Yes! Eight D6. Eight D six. One, two, three, four. Kill him. Is there eight? Yes. If you kill.

It spells mother classes. I'm going to take a shit on this table. 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 14, 15, 14, 15, moment. Oh my God. 24. 24 points of lightning damage. Yeah.

Kelle, kill it. Yeah. For the people at home, we live to hear Matt say, how do you want to do this? I let the player describe. their victory. So, as you sing to yourself to bolster your arcane energy, you release the sheer bolt of the energy. How do you want to do this?

The bolt of lightning begins in its tail and works its way up through its spine, slowly but painfully torturing it as it slowly, slowly feels the effect coursing through its evil body. All right, so, because of your varnic ability to actually shape sound from an arcane standpoint a lightning bolt should be an instant flash of arcane energy. You actually cause it to crawl. You control it as it begins to cascade up the torso of this horrible abomination. As it does, you can see the bolt splinter and destroy each

suture wound as each of its heads begins to slaw off the rest of the torso until nothing is left but the single head that's screaming into the air. As the bolt makes its way up the neck, its eyes, burst out in the blast of energy. And the body falls limping out. Can it have a lightning bolt shaped in an S? A scandin, she's like a bulb of the strange Naga beast.

Well done, Scanlan. As the dust settles, the eternally is still pumping in your system, Scanlan. All the rest of the dwarfs begin stepping down, putting the crossbows down, looking down at the little gnome that created a storm from its hands. It kind of, one of them pats on the shoulder, and was, well done. Thank you. Just promise me that you'll tell Pike about this. Okay. Because it was really cool, right? That was pretty cool. Okay, cool.

All the doors kind of look into the tunnel that it came from, and the one that you spoke to earlier, Penny was, so that's the kind of thing that's been coming out of there. Lovely. Yeah, thanks for the heads up. That was really helpful. We'll go ahead and leave the game there. Thank you, folks. I hope you guys have fun watching our first, first ever critical role, but that was a good time.

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