Critical Role & Sagas of Sundry - Vox Machina Ep. 30 - Stoke the Flames

Episode Date: November 30, 2021

The seeds of rebellion begin to take root in Whitestone! But as Vox Machina make their move to bring the population to revolt, they learn that another de Rolo may still be alive... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Great day for this to coincide. Great day for the air-condition. So Voxmachina had an encounter with two individuals known as the Briarwoods, Lord and Lady Briarwood, who currently control Whitestone, the city that Percival, Talison's character, once lived in, and his family once essentially ruled before they were usurped and most of them murdered by the Briarwoods.

So upon meeting them, a vengeance urge kicked up with then Percival, the rest of the party following him to White Stone to attempt to free the city from the clutches of the very, very seemingly evil and in some cases undead, Briarwoods, as the Lord Briarwood appears to be vampiric in nature. After arriving, they had some stealth missions. They went around, discovered a fair warning on the Sun Tree, one of the central items of white stone, a relic of Pellor from long ago that the city was built around, now dead, and holding a series of bodies hung from it,

all dressed and painted to look like members of Oxnachia. While they were here, they managed to find and hole up in an abandoned tavern, closing the windows off, and after doing a little bit of digging, spoke to the head of the ladies' chamber, the temple to Arathas, to which Percival and most of the team seems to be interested in starting a rebellion within White Stone. We planted the seed there to return to germinate at some point,

and then began to follow a couple of individuals, or at least an individual that was partially responsible for the really, really, honestly, shitty social atmosphere in White Stone. Following him back to a home, it was discovered that Circairian, one of the individuals responsible for the death of Percival's family, was still part of the ruling class. here. The party then snuck in through the bottom of the building, stealthed into a full surprise ambush upon him and his compatriots, murdered most of them. They took his toady, essentially,

Vok, and instead of murdering him, tore out his tongue, and then burned the Dorolo family crest into his forehead before throwing him out. You say they. Okay. Not quite how I remember it. But you're putting it is a lot worse than actually like... No, it's pretty bad. It's fun to push it that way. I feel this is a little sad. His eyes are yellow. But yeah, so with his tongue removed

and the symbol burned to his forehead, he was thrown out the window, and the party then escaped into the night rain, returning to their tavern, and that was where we left off. So, as you guys come in from the soaking wet rain that seemed to have been now pouring continuously to the city of Whitestone,

you come to the quiet of your tavern, The sun beginning to find its way setting across the evening sky. What would you like to do? I'm having a real hard time role-playing right now. What you mean? What are you doing, Vax? Come on. Look at that. It's actually really difficult to play a character when you're dressed as a different character.

I'm not going to lie. We're going to learn. We're going to learn how to do it. We're live, people. We want to role play as a character you're dressed at. But don't do that. It's not. But don't do that.

I don't know as groggy as ever. Yeah, I don't think Scanlon's gonna have a problem today. Nope. Nope. This is how I imagine myself to be. I'm genuinely trying to wipe the smile. I am not going to look at that table at all tonight. I'm all auditory for you three, sorry.

So we are, wait, I forget. You guys just now return to the table. We are at the camera. We are at the camera. We're at the camera. Somewhere in the park. It's nighttime now or it's night time now? Or it's night time now?

It's getting into the evening now. You guys have returned to the tavern. And as we return to the tavern, did we see hustle and bustle of people rising up in rebellion by any chance? Not yet. Overnight Rebellion. It's been fairly fresh since you even started the word of it.

We were very discreetly putting the dust traits of this. Yes, you were. And you're finding your way through. There doesn't appear to be anyone following. Plus, there was a large distraction with Sir Carien's homestead being lit on fire. the rain taking care most of it, but it drew people out of their homes to see this giant blazing symbol of the Dorolo family burning across the rooftop. So a message was definitely left

and probably received by somebody. And what are your plans? One down. How many are there left? Four. Four? Two. Four. Jesus. There are five total? Whoa, I did math. Remember, six barrels? One's empty. Do you think that the other two? The barrel names. So two are Silas and Delilah. Yes. The other, and we know that one of the other two barrel names resides in that place that we found. The Countess, what was her name? The doctor.

Dr. Ripley. Dr. Ripley. And what's the fourth name? Professor Ondas. Are we really going to talk about names right now and not the giant, creepy smoke monster that came out of you, Percy? I think we need to find a place to lay low. not here, not where we've been, somewhere else. I think we just scope out another place. I don't think it seems to leave tonight. I agree with Vex that we can't leave tonight. The streets are gonna be crawling with guards

and people looking for. Are we back in our hole where we were? We're back in the tavern. It might be smart to be down in the cellar tonight. Let's go down on the cellar. I agree. Is there any sort of way you can close us in? Make it look like it's a single story dwelling?

Yeah. Why don't we, yeah, we'll go down to the tree. tree and we can just make it look like no one's ever tunneled down there before. Yeah, I mean, we can literally camp next to the roots of the tree if we want to. I made it look nice in there. Okay. I'm not gonna... You're not gonna...

You're not... Your mustache is falling off. It is. It is? You know, the situation is very dire, I don't know why I'm laughing. It's kind of a nervous habit, I'm sorry. Speaking of nervous habits... One of us has a nervous habit of ejecting smoke from his rib cage.

I was also kind of thinking about the weird cough that you've had. I don't think you're getting sick. So tell us what's going on. What's going on with you? We've tunneled, right? We're where we are. You guys have made your way back to the inn if you all wanted to go down and go and go to the cellar.

All right. I'm going to go ahead and throw up some walls. Walls are like the false ground. I can do the false terrain, yeah. Yeah, do that. I'll do the false, a hallucinary terrain. So we can breathe. and I will just make it look like, like she said,

one story, no cellar. Okay. Can't get up. Empty. It's not there. Dirt floor. Just a floor, yeah. All right.

Awesome. Brum cloth. No one's here. Looks like it hasn't been touched. Okay. Those eyes make you look far more sarcastic than you normally do. I can't tell if he's just. Do they?

No. Oh, God. Jesus Christ. And he doesn't even smile at all. It's what worse. So, Percival, spill your guts. What's what's going on? I don't entirely know.

Where to begin? Yes, where to begin? You didn't look surprised when that happened. No, in fact, you pulled down your mask, which you don't normally do. In battles? It felt... It didn't feel like a surprise.

I don't know. It didn't feel good. I was hoping it would. You didn't seem to mind it as it was happening. I think I wanted him to recognize me. Who? Kirian. I don't know. I was hoping it would feel better. Could you feel it happening while it was? Were you conscious? Do you remember what you did? What the fuck is it? What is it, Percival? What is it?

A few years ago, I had a dream. I had a very intense. dream and in this dream something asked me if I wanted revenge and if I wanted the means to have revenge and all I would have to do in return offer up the souls of those I took oh that's all wait it was a dream it was a dream I've had it was not it was it was just a dream and and yet you're you've you've fashioned your entire life's goal upon this dream? I woke up in the morning with an idea, and I built

that idea, and I thought it was prophetic. And lately, I've been feeling a bit of string and recalling it, but it was just a dream. It wasn't... So the day after this dream is when you first developed your pepper box?

It's not the first time I felt inspired in my life. I just... It wasn't real. It wasn't real. And Percy, how long after the coup and after you lost your family was this dream? Be a year. I was fuzzy at first. I wasn't really me anymore. I was a fisherman for a while. I didn't do anything. This was something to do with myself. This was something to work towards. Well, we're clearly not talking about a dream anymore. We all saw it, so you have any theories? I don't. I don't know. I've never thought about it. I've never...

It matters now. I don't know what to do. Who's the last bullet for? We don't want to lose you, Percy. When I started this, I talked to a man at one point. It was the captain of one of the vessels that I was on. I told him what I intended to do, and I showed him what I was building. He said that if I really wanted revenge, if revenge was what I was after, that there would be no stopping it and there would be casualties along the way and I would have to give up things and I would have to hurt people. And that was the price. And so that last barrel is because it's not just

five names. I know that I'm going to have to keep hurting people and that this thing existing is just going to keep hurting people. It's the knowledge that it never ends. It's because I haven't just killed five people. I've killed a lot of people on my way here. I've killed them with you. It's to remind me that this is what I've chosen. I don't understand. We've killed with reason. And I've tried to. And I certainly have reason for these five names. They are not good people. These are not people who should be allowed to live. None of us debate that the Briar Woods and their circle should be allowed to go on.

We all understand what they're capable of. We all understand that they need to be removed. But what we just saw goes beyond. And you're telling us that this is going to continue after the Briar Woods and they're like are gone. What are we to look forward to, Percival? Where are we going? I was hoping that once I'd finished serving revenge that perhaps I could serve repentance.

You're speaking of these as if they're metaphysical beings. You're serving revenge. That sounds very literal and from what I've seen isn't inaccurate. I no longer feel in control. I no longer trust myself. I wouldn't expect I expect you to trust me. It's stretching a little thin right now, Bersie. But I trust you. Can I just do a quick insight to see if he's being entirely honest for us? You may.

Now that didn't work. That's better. 18. Go ahead and roll a dice per cent. Dice plus what? Actually, I'll roll it for you. What's your bonus? For which?

Uh, for both persuasion. Persuasion deception. Persuasion deception? Persuasion six, deception two. Cool. Gotcha. Okay. He seems very earnest, very broken,

confused but driven, and there isn't any part of his voice that seems to conceal or attempt to hold back any information. Are you afraid you're going to hurt us? I'm afraid I'm afraid I'm going to hurt us. to disappoint you. I trust that you are all here in service of justice and maybe friendship,

but I'm not. I'm here for revenge. And as much as I would like to believe otherwise, I know that's not true. And I think I need people here who are not here for revenge. I don't know how to stop this. Just because you started on this path for revenge doesn't mean you can't find other motivations along the way. Do you believe that you're not doing this with your friends or for your friends? Not even a little bit. It's only 100% revenge. No one does anything purely for one reason. And I could justify it, but I'd be lying. I want to hurt them. I want them to know it's me. I want them to feel remorse for what they've done. I want them to pay and if this thing is real, if this is really what is happening now, I hope that wherever

they go, they suffer forever and beyond. I think that sounds fair. And I am so grateful that there is justice to be found in it, but it is not justice that I am motivated by. And I couldn't pretend it would be. I am so grateful that there is justice in this, but even if there wasn't, I would still be here. I want to talk about a plan. Yes.

Our desires are in locks up, lockstep, up to a point. Once we have gotten rid of the last of them. I want to know what happens then, Percival. I've never had to think of this before. I think we get out of this either I'm going to need you to save me or finish me. Well, we won't do that. If it comes to it... Damn it, Whisk Pike. She would know about this.

I do want to save this city. Do, I mean, do we have any kind, can we do any kind of religion check to see if we know anything about this kind of entity? Yeah, go and make a religion check. Three. Suiting. Suting. Uh, 17. I mean, there are all sorts of extra planer entities throughout the realms that have their own individual.

Every you start to describe them with me, I mean, it's not good. You don't have a whole lot of experience outside of the realm of mortals. You've had a few interactions with things that kind of skew beyond that realm. While you get that he's saying it may just be a dream, you know that there are multitudes of creatures that thrive on these type of bargains. You do know that many of these bargains in a long run do not end up being wholly in the person's favor who struck it. Well, look, it's gonna help him on his quest to get revenge and kill all the people to kill his family, right? So can we do that?

And then if he gets out of control, we pop him on the head and take him to a temple. I think that's the best plan we have actually grown. I mean, he was really, you were really awesome in that last bite. You did look pretty amazing. I'm not gonna lie. A little bit of pee came out. It was that good. But I don't like how dark it went, Percy. It went really dark.

I... And here's the thing. Sorry. There's a thing. There it is, right there. Here's the thing. Oh, God, I hadn't even noticed. So sorry.

All right. Your chances of succeeding here alone are pretty fucking slim. And if you want us all to work with you, you can't go from door to door, bringing wrath and ruin the way you or you won't have our assistance. Not all of us.

Now, now, Vax, what are you talking about? We all knew what we were doing when we... Pay attention to me. I'm trying to be serious here. Don't you turn your eyes away from me? Look at me when I'm talking to you. I'm very upset right now. We all knew what we were doing when we went into the house.

It was an assassination mission. I don't understand why other one's harping on how dark it We knew we were there to kill everyone in the whole place. This is a city oppressed. These people did not invite it upon themselves. That guy deserved it. He was a... But we did rip his tongue out, which I think was a bit harsh.

He said take his tongue. These people don't want to exchange one warlord for another. We need to maybe dial it back a tick or two. No, I disagree. I do too, Pettostache. We have to make... We have to make a strong appearance. This is shock and awe. We're not going to

win over the people by, you know, half measures and, hey, let's hold an election or something. We have to kill everyone in as dramatic a fashion as possible. This is beheading a pony all over again. You think we're going to win them over by showing them how disgusting we are? No, how disgusting they are and how disgusting they die. Yeah, they deserved it. No, no, no, no. I mean the civilians here. We're not going to kill civilians.

Of course, but we're trying to win them over. and if we're showing that we're ripping out their tongues and pulling their ears off and flaying the balls. These people are are in oppressed. They're going to be just as scared of us as they are of the Briar Woods. They'll probably be pretty happy that the people that have been hurting them

are being punished. Yes, they've been oppressed, but we've also seen that there's plenty of cases of people being charmed by them. We might have an army of people who will die for the Briar Woods at any cost and not even realize that they're being charged that way. I wouldn't mind a few people being scared of us too.

I will say it did get out of hand. And if I had known then what I know now, I would hope that you would restrain me in those moments where I seem to be going further than I should. What? What? Are you saying for your bullet, for your final bullet, you want us to stop you? No, he's saying that if he goes dark, if he goes against his person that we know. Knock me out and take me to a temple. What's what I mean? You don't want to scratch the name off the barrel? I didn't know who was going to disappear, to be fair.

I thought that maybe I could stop what was happening to me if I... I... I... ...hamicked. Percy, do you realize we tried to talk to you for a good 15 minutes after all of that last night, and you were... Unreachable? Uh... Do you remember that?

So us sitting... if you start getting out of control, and you think that we're going to be able to be like... Yo, Percy, calm it down a bit. I don't... We're not gonna do that, we're gonna knock him the fuck out. Yes. Don't worry, Percy, we've got you. I don't think I would... I don't think I would knock him out.

I'll knock you out if you really want me to. If I start to turn against you, if you think for a moment that I'm out of control, please, please, please do what is necessary. Don't deal. The moment that I turn on any of you, the moment that I even threaten, any of you. There's a moment I'm not in control. No matter what is happening. Yeah, okay. I walk

up and I kiss him on the cheek. And I say, don't you worry. Thank you. Especially with a cough. Thank you. I don't believe you're really sick, darling. Vex, I've heard a cough like that and it's probably syphilis. Lovely. Thank you, Scanlon. I barely sleep. I don't. Personal experience. That's all I'm saying. One time. So shall we rest and then we get to go find another housey? Well, maybe we should, now that I guess we have the knock Percy out in case of emergency plan, should we have a revolution plan? Because we seem to be divided on that. There's still two more lords in the city, and there's the castle. They know we're here now.

It might behoove us to spend a day or two finding another shelter, and also seeing what our actions have resulted in and seeing if we can't sway some opinion in our favor. Because we're strong, but we're also pretty weak these days, and I wouldn't want to go against the big guns yet until we have the people behind us, or at least possibly turn one of those giants to our side or something. We need some help.

We have a map of the city, yes? Yes. I think it best to stay off of the streets. Is it possible, Keyleth, to tunnel through the city underneath it? What a good idea. I can, actually. Can't really talk to people that way. No, but they know we're here. It's not safe.

We can come up in secret, leave symbols to rally the people and hide again. Do you get a beat on the vibe of what people are saying after? Hey, Hepcat, yes. I'm wanting to get a beat on the vibe. Yes, I think we need to get, we need to hear what people are saying in the privacy of their homes, maybe. We need to do some snooping. Well, there's a few good people at our party who are like that. And we need to find another potential safe house. Okay. That's plan number one then. I'm also, I think it's not a bad idea to spread this Dorolo family crest around some more. Have we been to the alcove yet? You went to the alcove?

No, you have not been to the alcove. No, you went to the other. We haven't been to the alcove of the barracks yet. And the barracks are right against the castle, though. You correct. You went to the lady's chamber, and you spoke briefly with Keeper Yenen.

Yeah, with you with Keeper Yen. Yeah, let's go to the barracks. And you went to be on the horizon, which was abandoned and partially collapsed. The barracks will be our last stop, I believe. Just because it's outside the city proper, and it's up the hill. We might be able to stay at the alcove,

which is a magic shop that used to be in town. I know the proprietor I did, if he's still alive. Yeah, let's go there. A magic shop? Okay. It's like a magic shop, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, yes, a magic shop.

It's an arcane boutique, yes. Arcane boutique. And we can... Are we tunneling there? Are we going there? No, are we resting? What time is it? We should rest for the evening.

It's night time. Right now, I'd say based on preparation, the illusion casting, conversation, you're looking at about 9, 9.30 in the evening. Okay. That's great. First light. If you fall asleep, is that illusion going to vanish? No, I think I'm just in our terrain last point. I don't know.

A little bit. Anything near us? Can I look like sense vampires above us? So look for undead? Undead. Okay. You feel a surrounding presence scattered throughout the city, some large, some small. You sense you can gather over period of time of concentration. You can feel the slow movement of the zombie giants moving through the city,

these sentinels just slowly tromping through, and a number of other Undead entities. Does it feel like there's more in movement in motion than there were before? Before we set off the blaze? I would say yes, there appears to be a little more haste and movement to what entities you can. You can't pinpoint specifics, but you do sense that there is a heightened state of movement to what you've previously sensed. Okay.

Yes, I have a thought that at night, obviously these streets are full of dead things. tomorrow the Briar Woods and the people who work for them are going to start pulling people out of their houses and telling them to look for us or anyone who's not from this city. So I don't think that the beggar routine is going to work from much longer. Of course, but if you want to go and talk to people,

I think we could probably get away with poking about first thing in the morning and that's it. Okay. So we should get up early. All right. All right. To talk to some. And in addition to your excellent illusion spell.

Which lasts for 24 hours. That's wonderful to hear. Is there any other means of protection that we have? I mean, if they are magic wielders, they might be able to sense our presence or something. Is there any way to obscure that? I guess I'm asking this, but I'm one of the only two magic wielders here, so I should know the answer. As I say, it probably be a me and you thing. In terms of making us not as noticeable,

I mean, seeming is probably our closest thing. I don't have anything that's. It's just visual, though. Nothing like a bubble of protection or anything? I've got my anti-life shell, but they're in there. But they're undead. Lovely. Well, first watch.

Who's taking it? I mean, we can all get a good light sleep, I think, if we tunnel us in and with the sanatory terrain. I still think we should keep watch, because if they send it. anything. Yeah, I'll take second. All right.

Okay. So you're all down in the bottom of the tunnel by the roots of the sentry? Yeah. And you've hallucinary terrain to the cellar. Yeah. Okay. I hate that he's asking for clarification. What?

I don't know. Just don't want me. Close your cat eyes. What's the DC of your spell? Of my hallucinatory terrain? Of all your spell casting, what's the DC? Um, it's 17. Oh no.

18. 18. to make an intelligence save to see through the Lus and Toy trains. Correct. If something were interested in doing it. Sure. Exactly. Hypothetically.

So who's taking first watch? Percy. I will watch with him. Yeah, Percy can't watch them. Sorry, back, too slow. No. That's fine. I'll watch with him.

I mean, I raised my hand before, but that's all right. I'll get so sweet. OK. It's tight quarters. And other than, other be a magical light or torch that someone has put up there, there is no light source. It is pitch black down here. So what are you guys using as a light source?

Or are you leaving it to pitch darts? Oh, you can light your little flaming Warhammer. Fine. I take the flaming war hammer and I'll whisper the magic word. Warshab. And it will turn it on fire. Okay. I'm pretty sure he just said bagel.

You don't. Bagel. Brickle. Good word. It's Kegel. Beagle. Alrighty. So you guys take first watch.

I progress this till about 11 p.m. midnight or so. Do you guys finish? Who's taking second watch? All right, we got Grog and Vax. All right, so you guys... Well, Percival is sleeping. I pulled Grog over and we just look at him for a while. I said, where do you think the smoke comes out of? That's a good question. Do you think it's his, like the nostrils?

No, it looked like it was coming from the bottom up, and there's only like, two holes down there. So it's either. That's right. Yeah. It's either the dirt button or. It could just be his paws. You're right, it's probably the bird.

The dirt button. It's probably the periscope. Yeah. As you guys are having this conversation, like the air down here, it's damp earth. It's chilled in the night anyway, but it's a little warmer because you're under the ground and it's absorbed some of the heat of the day.

But it is getting noticeably colder. It's getting colder? Yeah, just as the evening progresses. The temperature at night here in that. Colder than it did last night? Because it also got pretty cold last night. It seems... It seems...

There is a low mist begins to form within the tunnel from the temperature. From the, like just... Oh no. From the temperature. I'm going to wake up my sister. What? You what? What's going on? What's going on?

It's cold. Can we do some sort of like see if it's magic? Can we see if it's magic? Make an inside check. Do the thing again. You know, you can tell them stuff around. Oh, good, and one. Can I do a nature check to just show them

it's just fucking fog? Yeah, go ahead. Go back to sleep. Go back to sleep. A 13. OK. You step forward and take a good long look at the fog that's like slowly begin to form at the base

of the tunnel you guys are in. As you lean forward and kind of take it in, the fog begins to form into a physical humanoid essence and reach out for you. For the three that are conscious role initiative. Oh, God. Oh, God. It's a teeny tiny tunnel. It's another damn like ghost-raping.

A tony tiny tunnel. Ghosting in. Right. What if the sun tree is like... The source of the bad? Yeah. It's possible it is. That's kind of funny.

Well, okay. It's not a bad theory. What if they're like, what if the briar woods are like right under the sentry and we're just like right above them? What if they didn't hang the bodies? The tree just grabbed people. So grud.

Back in the fog. The taxi's waking up. The sentry is silence. Sleeped next to her. Percy. Oh God. Actually, can you move? the wormwood box because all I, yes, yes, wormwood,

yeah, wormwood, check out, check out, beautiful boxes. Indeed, all right. You look really good, Matt. I can't move for this. Great, all right, so, get some initiatives on this for Grog. 17. 17, already.

Okay, Laura. Oh, 22. 22, all right, and. 18. 18. We're ready. Are we spooning? Oh, this is a long big.

We're sporking. Correct. Oh, we are? You guys might be sporking. Scissoring? So Vex, Grog. Then you rolled the what? 18.

Oh, sorry, sorry. Vax. Spooning with your hands up. Vex, you rolled. I mean, it's tight quarters. I'm sure we're all. No, chopsticks. Grog, you were 17.

17. Okay. So Grog, this is technically a surprise round on you, and then we'll get back to you guys. to you guys on your topical initiative. You can see now the mist is formed into a pale humanoid with two more now that have rolled in. Shit. There. These pale looking kind of intensely feral human beings with elongated fangs emerge from this mist and immediately lunge out towards you.

What they're fomper? Can they do that? They can. They're fucking vampires. No, no, they can only become bats. I read about this. Fuck. Focking. Let's do this. So, first and foremost, the one that lunges out of grog is on a ship to the side there.

Is going to make a claw attack against you that is a 20 to hit. That hits. That hits. All right. You take eight points of slashing damage. No, you do not, actually. Instead, it is going to attempt to grapple you. Or not attempt, it grapples you. So it reaches out and grasps onto some of the hide armor you have tied or in terms. armor you have tied her on your shoulder, pulls you in, and is going to attempt to sink its teeth into your actual body.

Don't forget that we all have our amazing metal around our neck that Scamlin got us. That's true. So, you're so intimidating and that cost you. Good. It really is. Close your eyes, close your eyes. That is 17 versus armor class. It misses.

Okay, so it attempts to bite into you. You move out. out of the way just in time in that little bit of chain mail. That practically useless piece of chain mail wrap around your giant thick neck does manage to catch its fangs and deflect the attack initially. Hey! A little piece of metal thing? Hey, I made that. I call it a scantlin. I call everything a scam.

This one's going to swoop in, as you are now currently grappled by the other one, it's going to attempt to grab you on the other side. Ooh, that is a 21 to hit, so it's going to grapple you. And this one's also going to now reach up with its claws and try and pull back the chain mail to grasp you there. And it's going to surprise round. Ooh, natural 20. All right, so you take five points of piercing damage.

Okay. And you're a vampire. And 11 points of necrotic. Okay. And your maximum hit points are reduced by 11. God damn it. Really? We haven't had another feast yet.

Beast is gone, too. Thanks. So this third one over here is going to attempt to come after UVX. Yeah, bring it. It closes to it. That is a 24 to hit. Oh, that hits, but I'm using uncanny dodge. Okay, to reduce the damage by half?

Okay. It's a 2D4 slashing against you. 10 points of slashing damage? Is the half? Yeah. Okay. It's going to claw you again. That is going to be a 12.

No. Yeah. So the first one just slashes across the side of your shoulder. You manage to pull out of the way just in time to lessen the impact. This however sets you up for an easily dodged second blow that you just swoop out of the way, just barely in time. Healing the wind above your head. That ends their turn. Now we're at the top of the initiative order for the surprise round.

This has not been enough noise to wake you guys yet, so you're going to hold on until somebody can just to get your attention. So top of the round will be. be vex. Okay, I'm gonna say, wake the fuck up! And I am going to... I'm going to... Um, I'm going to... Can I hide?

Is that what I do is my bonus? You have nowhere to hide in this room, unfortunately. Even that's super dupe dark? You get the idea that these creatures probably aren't largely affected by the dark. That makes perfect sense. I'm going to huntus monk, the one that's... looks the strongest. Okay. One that's most visible to you two,

probably be this one that would should win after your brother. Okay. I'm now going to attack him with my blazing bow. All righty. Go for it. Natural 20! Nice!

Oh! Yeah, yeah. Breaking in the new box. It's right. It's my dice in a box. Yeah, box. Yeah. Yeah.

So I add all of my dice together and then I double it and then I add the modifier. And I hunt his mouth, yeah. Yes you did. Oh, we just woke up. They're groggy. 31. I know the first hit.

All righty. Yeah, 31 definitely hit. That's 31 damage. Oh, throwing damage. Yeah. Okay. Got. All right.

The second one was a three. It was a 14 to hit. 14 to hit. Oh, no, that, unfortunately, dodges out of the way. Its reflexes are very, very quick. Yeah, I'm sure. Be honest, the karma will come back to you.

I know. That's all right. So, as you pull back, you release, and with a flash of burning energy, your arrow just ignites mid-transit, blasts and bursts into the vampire creature who his his as a, into the dark. The second arrow, though, this time it's completely ready for,

and actually just to swipe it out of the air with its clawed hand. Okay, that ends your turn. Next up is Vax. All right, there's one vampire right in front of me, right? The one who hurt me. Correct. But I'm looking past his head at the one next to Grog. The one that's got a blade down there on the map.

I'm gonna know the other one. This one? Yeah, I think we've got a pretty good shot at him. I'm gonna ignore the vampire in front of me and since Grog is right up against that guy, I'm gonna sneak attack him from here and just go, oh no, first I'm gonna go click with my heel. All right, good to have a. Okay, go for it. Click, click, dagger, dagger.

Diggin, dagger. Okay, the first, the first is, alright, it's an 18. The second is a 28. Yep. And the third is a 21. Yep. All three hit?

Yeah, the first one was. I don't remember. 18, 18. Yeah, that's right. Yeah, they all hit, not a problem. Yay. Okay, so the first one is the snook-a-ch-ch-tirk and that gets

8 plus Oh, I should be using the Warm one back. 8 plus 12, 15, 18, 18, 23, 5, 25 for the first one, and then for the second dagger that sinks into his head, that is 8. And for the third one that sinks

into his fanged fucking face, that is 9. All righty. Cool. So you click the boots of haste, you feel the influx of adrenaline and hit your body, the magical push. You take the daggers and

The vampire in front of you tries to swipe out of your hand, but you're too fast, and you've already released all three before can even get to your wrist and pull back. Kind of grinning at it. All three daggers repeatedly, hitting nearly the same point, like an amazing throwing of darts. Just smack, smack into the center of the chest of the vampire across the way. It's distracted by Grog. It doesn't see them coming until it's too late and screeches out in pain. Towards you. What? The eyes up on this. A nice and sizable chunk of damage.

All righty, that ends your turn unless you want to move or try to move. Yeah, actually, I'm going to... No. Nope. I'm good. All right. Grog, you're up. I would love to rage. Please do.

I would hope to take by fire of Bratmore Hammer and pound that shit to the left of me twice in the head with my fiery hammer. All righty. Go forth. Oh, yes. Hmm. That is 15. 15 just barely hits.

And that's a one. Oh. So hard to roll play to that. No, no. I'm Jimmy Fallating and it's like so hard. Yeah, you are. So 16. 16.

16. Where does the damage in the first one? All right. The one that just got three daggers to its chest. As the dagger vanishes from its wound, it looks over at you as you're already big grin, mid-swing. Wham! The Warhammer blast into its chest, a burst of fire kind of reething around its torso for a second. It gets pushed up against the wall.

This time you go to swing with all your might on that second blow, trying to smash it up against the earth that you guys have carved this tunnel out of. It ducks out of the way, and split-second timing, and your hammer gets wedged into the end. wedged into the side of the wall. Go ahead and make an athletics check. Oh. Let's it out. Nine. Nine.

It's pretty well wedged in there right now. Next weapon. It's just dirt. All right. Next, next weapon. All right, so now this one's gonna shift over this way towards you, Percy. As you're on the ground prone still,

just coming to consciousness, could just and lunges out towards you. This one's gonna move here, place in that position. This one's going to shift here to be. I don't know. It's going to stay there. Stay right there. All right, so the one going against you, Grog. It still has you, no, the one that had you grapple walk away

towards Percy. Other one's going to him to grapple you. That was 18? Misses. Misses. You just slap aside with your hand as you're still trying to pull the warhammer out of the wall. I need to get closed lined by the grip you have on it.

It's going to strike you with you. It's closed to the second attack. That is, oh, that's a 10. Yeah, no. You're just kind of out of the way and laugh in its face. The one over here against you, personally we're on the ground. So we're prone.

Oh, okay, that'll be an 18? I'm an 18. You're an 18. It reaches down and grabs you by the front of your shirt and it lifts you up to it with this hissing sound. Oh, yeah, that'll be at 25. 25. 25.

you in and just sinks its fangs into the side of your throat. You feel yourself gasp out in pain as the cold sensation pulses through your body, the actual life's blood being drained from you. That'll bring... Okay, you take four points of piercing damage. He's got very short. You take eight points of necrotic damage and your hit points, maximum hit points are reduced by eight. I forgot I have advantage on strength checks when I'm raging. Well, again, but I'm forward. Oh, wow, really?

As if the gods defy you. It's good, you have advantage. So you're now grappled in the hell there, it's like pulling the blood out of your throat. You're caught off guard and completely just confused, frightened, and serious pain at this moment. All right, and the one that's going to that's going to attempt to grab you.

Yeah. That is a 20. Oh, no. Yeah, that works. No damage. It's just going to grab you. And it goes into attempt to go through your throat. You being prepared for this and haven't been seducted to this once before,

you bring up a dagger up towards its face, and it just barely manages to pull it to the way before you thrust it up through the bottom of its neck. Managing to deflect the attack. All right. The people who just woke up, roll initiative, please. Greetings, adventurers. Spring has sprung here in Los Angeles,

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Initiative. Which for the record, Scanlan, as a reminder, as a fan mentioned me this last week, your Jack-Ball-Trades ability as a bar that gives you plus two to all things you're not proficient in, also adds to your initiative. It does add to your initiative. What? Jack-Ball-Trades. I've had this brought it multiple times if it's not.

I know it's been brought up. If the internet says it, it must be true. I thought it was a hypothetical thing. Is it true? It's been clarified by a couple of publications that have been sent to me when I questioned it. What is the bonus for that hat? Thank you, Internet.

We'll consider that hat plus two bonus. Today you get a plus two. So I rolled a 20 initiative then. Oh, snap. Scanlon, nice from back. Wow. 12. 12.

All right, Percy. 22. Wow. I have really good initiative. Good. All right, so we are now at the top of the round. This puts us to Vex and Percy going simultaneously. Ooh.

I'll go for, I'm going to try and break grapple, obviously, since that's what I have to do. Can I hate him by shooting him at the same time as he's trying to break the grapple? You know what, yes. Go ahead and roll an attack, the first attack. Go for the ear. You get the sage still?

It's been a lot. Still at home. It's been a lot of ones today, man. It's only the first hour. Yeah, all right. So unfortunately, the first arrow. Sorry, Percy. There's too much movement to the bodies

and it doesn't strike true, so you do not have advantage on this check. Acrobatics or athletics, your choice. Acrobatics. All righty. Let's be clear, that was the shitty plastic dye, not the world. 28. 28.

You've managed to break the graph. That was the one that Will gave me. So that's my action, though. That's my action though. Correct. But if I spend an action surge, I can get an action? You can, yes. Do I get three attacks with the sword I just picked up

since I'm too close to use my gun right now? Technically, yeah. I'm going to draw the rapier that I just picked and just start stabbing at the terrible thing. All right. Screaming. Go for it. Is your little butt flap down?

Are you in the long jump? The butt flap of my soul is down. I'm well dressed at the moment. Thank you. It's a plus one right here. It's a plus one right here. But your archery, I think you took was your combat? Yes, so I get a negative two to attack.

Correct. To what you normally get. So it would be overall plus one. So I get a plus one to attack on top of my... No, sorry. Minus one is your total. It's what you get for your pistols, for your... Minus one, not minus two.

Correct. Gotcha. Is the magical rapier officer's that of it? That's... 25. 25 hits. That's a 1. That's so that misses. Yeah, the, okay, go ahead and roll a third time. And that's a 14. Okay, so the first strike sinks true. Go ahead and roll damage and that's 1D8 plus. What's your strength modifier? Oh, no, it'll be Dex because it's a finessement.

Be Dex, thank you. So that's one d'8 plus Dex. Plus one, on top of that, because it's a plus one. It's a plus one. So that's nine. Nine damage, all right. So you swing first, the speed of your ability to break free the scrapple and then immediately pull this weapon and jam it forward.

It pierces part of the body and pull out in the creature, all of a sudden, ah, streaks over and grabs its side instinctually. You go for two more strikes. However, being the first time in a long time that you've ever held a rapier and still kind of with your other hand holding the side of your throat and the severe pain, it just flings forward twice. the second time the Kuchat actually grabs it

and pulls you in towards it this time. What? So yeah, you're not considered re-grappled. God give it! Vampire don't give a shit. He doesn't. All right, so you can take out the next two. My second, I'll do my second arrow.

I try to hit him again. Okay, go for it. Because I, you know, I don't like that I missed. I fucking hit him this time. I know, right? Don't suck so hard. Come on, don't do that. again. I'm my sister. That's better. That's definitely is. It was an 18 plus. 18? 18 plus that? Yeah. Yes. Go to old name. This is against the one that's on Percy still or the one that's against your brother?

Once against your brother. I said it was the one against Percy, but the other one's Hunter's Mark. Sounds so upset about that. That looks like you were read it. Well, I'm just saying. Too late. That is good. 16. 16. All right. All right. This arrow, however, does manage to to sink into its side and protrudes about four inches from its body. It's pretty deep into its torso between a couple of ribs, but you see the creature being the undead nature of its physicality. It's not looking too great, but it's not at the end of its rope right now.

All right, that ends. That we're up to Scanlan. You're up. Okay, so there's three of these things? There are three of them, yes. Okay. I'm going to use my movement. Can I see them all?

You can currently, yes. They're all. I'll use my movement because I just woke up to pee. Because I just woke up, I gotta pee. Do you have morning? I probably have a, it's midnight wood. Okay. Midnight wood.

So it's probably gonna go everywhere. You are acting like your Botox. I know. I can't move my lips. So, Scalin, you use your movement to pee. All right. So your face is- While I'm peeing, I whip out my wand of magic missiles.

Jesus. And I point it and I use four of the slots for it. Okay. To shoot. Four times three is 12 missiles. Can you do that? It's each slot is one magic missile spell, which is three missiles. Can you only use it once a turn, though?

It says on the thing, on the wand. Does the wand behave like the spell level? For one charge you cast the first level spell. You can increase the spell slot level for each additional charge you spend. No point. So yeah. So I'm gonna use four of them. Like a battleship. Like a level four magic missile.

Right. Which is 4D4 plus four. You little tricks. For each one that I hit. Like a rhinestone cowboy. It's the muscle. stash. Yeah. Burt Reynolds should play with us more often.

You've got the best old man laugh ever right. This guy's the brains of the operation. Let me break the fourth wall. Let me break the fourth wall just for a second to say that this game is totally fucked. It's a totally fucked. It creates an additional dart per spell level, so it's initially three, and it's three levels higher, so it creates a little six. So it doesn't increase it three darts per level. level, it's one. So if I do a level four, I get two darts for each fucker.

Essentially, yeah, it'd be six d4 plus six. Okay, so 2D4 plus two for each guy. Okay, I'll do that. All right, and they hit automatically. There's no role for it. Great. And you can't hit my friends or anything. No, they're only hitting. They're homing arcane missiles. So the world is six times or just two? You want some... Six times. I know.

Unless it's really good. One. So three. Three plus two for the first guy. Because of five against him. 10 for the second guy. All right. And seven for the third guy. All right.

So as you get up, spraying an arc across the front. By the way, I'm holding my dick with one hand in the lawn. So you're doing everything. I'm dual wielding. Are you proficient in this? I think Scanlon's pretty proficient in this. I'm just saying.

All right, so. And they're both spraying every day. Oh, God. Happy Halloween. Are you writing your name with your left hand? Okay, so as you sign your signature on the ground, you also burst forth with a series of arcane bolts that streaks across the room, slamming into the sides of each of these vampires.

They all look towards you as a reaction to the pain, and their heads all turned curiously as to what they see. Not what they were expecting. Don't worry. I won't wash my hands. All right, so use your movement in your action. I think it's your turn, right? Do I get a bonus?

Do you want to use one? Yeah, sure, so I'll inspire Grog. Yay! I need Grog to rage and get us through this semi-fucked kind of fight. Baby, yeah. Wow! Way back. Up, up, up.

Kill, Kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill. Kill, kill, kill, kill, kill. Kill, kill, kill, kill, kill. All right, take your D10 inspiration, D-Grog. Oh, man, I get a D10 inspiration. Oh, that's so, that's so Ravenloft. Stop it. Wow, wow.

And we're done. Take the inspiration back. Yeah, take it back. All right, Vax, you're up. No, I'm not. Are you really? All right, Vax is not going after Grog. Yep.

All right, Rod, you're up. I want to hammer in the morning, and I want to pull my hammer out of the wall. Okay, you can use one of your attacks to go ahead and make an athletic trick. Yay, that's better. A new shot. That's so ready to pull the hammer out without an issue. You're kind of embarrassed the fact that it was even embedded in what is essentially just part of earth and you still couldn't pull it free. But now it's blazing the flames, it's tighten your grasp.

What are you going to follow it up with? Can I use the great weapon master? master on these attacks and I'll use reckless attack for advantage on them. Okay. Anybody that attacks me gets advantage as well. Yes, you can. Okay. Nice. Thank God. 21.

21. Anyone hits. Beautiful. And the second one. That's on the side. That's 24. Yep, both hit. Go ahead and roll damage plus 10 to each.

Danples. Okay. Which one? The one that's next to Percy, the one that's in front of you here. One is next to me. All right. 14 and 15. So 25 for the first one.

All right. Stanky. Did you just say stanky? Yeah, he did. There is no difference between our old home game and this. This is. Except we don't have air conditioning. 29.

29 damage. Sheesh. So one that's harassing you and kind of chuckling at the fact that you've currently been unable to really prove your might as a Goliath in front of these individuals. You grin as you pull it back and, wham, slam it directly in the face of it. It just kind of rears back, confused for a second.

You see a crack in its jaw, and blood beginning to trickle on its jaw. You pull back and slam it a second time, this time with a resounding crack sound, as partially its jaws dislodged and sit at the side. Its tongue kind of dangling out, and dark kind of black blood begins to pour from the center of its mouth as it looks to you with absolute fear.

That was pretty rough. Yeah. All righty. You want to do anything with your movement? Nope. All right. Actually, I'll put my back against the wall. This way?

Yes. Okay. To kind of open it up in case somebody wants to take a shot at it. Okay. It will get an attack of opportunity on you. Are you cool with that? Yes. All right.

With advantage because... Oh, that's right. That is a 22. That is a 22. That is. All right. So, I mean, you are raging. so you take 10 points,

and now five points of slashing damage. Okay. Alrighty. Cool. That brings us to Vax. Now is your time. Right, yeah, I'm good now. So the vampire is still in front of me, right?

So I give him a look like, yeah, go fuck yourself. And then I keep throwing at the other guy who's with Grog still, right? Nope, Grog moved away. All right, then I'll handle the guy up front. So I'm just going to go for his guts. I'm going to go low, one, two, three, right in his guts. Already.

And the first attack. Way hits. That's a 30. And the second attack is a 24. And the third attack is 17. All right. So those all hit? Okay.

They do. They do. That's 11 for the first. And eight for the second. And eight for the third. All right. Right, his vampire guts. You just jam the dagger into its torso.

It's trying to stop and slap the hands away, but you're too fast, and the final hit, you push it up, and you're right in its face again. You can see its thing is still wet with the blood that it pulled from your throat, and you just kind of grin at it back as you withdraw the dagger with much, much force and anger. And the last thing I say is,

Vampires ain't shit. Getting that on a jacket. Shippish, shit. All right, cool. That ends your turn, unless you want to move or do anything else? Alright, now it's their tune. You notice, by the way, last round, this round specifically, as they're looking a little more wounded,

their flesh begins to slowly reform, the wounds they've taken begin to seal up, and the pouring of blood begins to slowly turn to a trickle. So what? So does Scallon's mustache? Strobe. I would smile right now if I could. I just want to tickle you. All right, this is going to move up to here.

I'm gonna move up to here. It's not exactly perfect. Oh, I'm sure. Is it just been seriously boned in initiative? Am I still sleeping? Yeah, you're last. It's like a small black eagle that is a land to turn.

I'm still asleep. We're awake, you woke up, you're just prone. Well, I'm real groggy. Real groggy. Sorry. You're never gonna stop being funny. You're so attractive tonight for some reason. Have I, have we been together?

What? Are you using a new conditioner? Oh, you and I have been together. Those little pony tails out. Did you see? Ooh, look at that. I carved that in with a pen myself after our night together.

Where have you been my whole life, sorry. It's canon. This is our least serious episode ever. We cannot wear costumes, but once a year, once a year. It's the only time that it works. And pour them. And poor them also. It'll be a pajama night for Christmas.

Yeah. Speaking of which person, it's your It's your turn? It's not my turn. There's two of them now being a good one you. It's a natural 20. How many slats three? All three. They're all three.

They're taking hits. That's a 20 and a 15. The 20 hits, the 15 does not. All right, well, you take 14 points of slashing damage from the claw. The first one, the second attack, it attempts to slash you a second time. second time, you manage to just dodge it the way, putting your back up against the wall to barely avoid its grasp. However, the second one lunges towards you, attempting to grab you. That is a 19? 19 hits. 19 hits. No damage, but now it's grabbed you and shoved you up

against the wall. It takes one hand and jams it up under your chin to push your head up. Goose for your throat. Rolls one. Yes. As it goes to bite towards your throat, you pull pepperbox up and jam it into its mouth. It has to pull back from the attack, and you get you know, like the kind of vampire saliva all over the barrel of the gun. And it may have tripped a tooth.

All right, so that finishes their turn. Keyleth, you're up. Oh, I finally, huh, to, huh, ho. Not a dream. Not a dream. Oh, okay, I thought it was for a second. Real vampires, real vampires. Real vampires.

Okay, okay, okay. Are they like, what's the situation with the vampires? That's all them clusters there. There's two of them right there on Percy. They have them grabbed and shoved against the wall. And there's one over here that's kind of battling back and forth with Vax. Now the key looks in the fight.

They have amazing. Where's Percy? Against the wall. You're against the wall. Okay, so I get up. Yeah. So you're no. Can I kind of like reach around Scanlan?

I'm doing another. You're doing a reach around. You're doing a reach around, okay. And my dick is out. I kind of see as I reach around. reach around and I'm like oh really and I'm blasting Are you impressed by what you see? And what do you?

I'm blasting the sunbeam. Not everyone gets to see the queue. Those two, it's a line. Are they kind of like in a line? You'd probably have to move to get them both in a line. Can I shift to where I can? You can move there to do it. That's what I want to do.

Okay, so you slide alongside Scanlan. And I yelled to the party, shield your eyes! All right, so. Instinct to recover my penis. Oh my goodness. It's more important than my eyes. Well, in the sense, it's an eye. Take my eyes, not my penis.

All right. It's the known one. Yeah, no, you were technically in melee with this guy, but there's no attack roll for this, so you don't have disadvantage, which is good. Awesome. All right. So I roll a bunch of ducon. D6s or something? Well, yeah, go ahead and do that.

Each case makes a constitution saving throw. So. How many D6s do I roll? What is it? It's 68 radiant damage, and they have disadvantage on the saving throw because they are undead. So the first one. Oh, wow. That is a 14.

Nope. Second one. No. It's disadvantage. It's making it happen. Third one. No, roll the one. All right, so all them take full damage.

Full damage. Whoa! Okay. That is 15, 19. Not bad. 21 plus 12, so that's 33. 3rd. 3. Radiant damage.

And they're blinded. What? Woo! Is that true? Okay, well. Yes, they are. So, both of these vampires that currently have Percy pinned up against the wall.

Work on the archipelag. One of them is like trying to bite it throat and Percy's trying to keep it at bay with its weapon. Sacapella. If you step forward, you gather the nature-based energy. Trying to also not look at Scanlan's penis. Right. There is light and there's shadow.

You feel the inspiration based on the presence of the sun tree and what previously you were attempting to try and repair it with. Using that, you close your eyes and a burst of sunlight energy cascades forth, slamming into both vampires and just barely missing Percy in the process. Both of them look over at the corner of their eye at the end. as they see the flash of light, they both scream out as the blast shoots through both of them.

Both of them immediately turn to ash. Oh! Yes! Damn! That was so cool. That was cool. Zip! One of a sacked.

So there's one alive? There's one alive, yes. It's right next to you. And he's on Vax? Currently, yes. Okay, I see that. I turn and I see him. I'm going to take a grasping vine.

I'm going to wrap around. around it and yank them and kind of beat them up against the wall on the other side. This side here? Yep. Okay, is the bonus action for Grasping Vine? Yes, it is. What's the roll for that? I'm looking for the roll for Grasping Vine real fast. It's Sunshine Day. I conjure a Vine.

There we go. I think it just happens. It's a dexterity saving throw. With the DC, it's 17? Nope, 18. 18. Oh, that gets it. Oh, ha, ha, ha, ha.

How, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, all, how, how, how, how, how, how. Damn, all, all, all, how. Pull it, shab! Into the wall over that way. Yeah. It's now, probably wrapped around its torso, so it tries to pull itself free.

We should probably use sunlight on them always, because don't they tend into mist if we don't. Yeah, I think so, yeah. All right, that brings to the top of the round, Vex and Percy, it's here to go. Should we, uh, stick? I don't know, should, should we attack him, or should we let,

Oh yeah, I bust out one of the wooden daggers. I walk up and I try to stab it into his heart from my brother. All right. Nice! Wooded dagger! All right. Yeah, that's cool. Okay. I still get two attacks, right? Correct. And you're using your dexterity as the bonus. Okay.

You get advantage because of gravel? Simple weapon which you're proficient with. Ninete. That is a 19 does hit, yep. Okay. Then what I do? Rolls the second. See if they will hit. Let's see if they will hit it.

Uh, probably no. 14. 14 is not hit. Alright, so go ahead and roll 1D4. Okay. Add your dex modifier. Nine? All right, so you take the heavily sharpened wooden dagger, essentially,

you jam it into its chest. It screeches out in pain the, the, the, The wooden stake itself, like partially destroyed in the process of jamming it in there to do so much damage, reaches up and grabs it and breaks it off. And the part is still in its chest and hissed at you angrily. Wooden stakes don't work. I bank up. You got some damage in, no, yes? Yeah. So.

Shit. That steak was well done. Oh. Yeah. That was so CSI, Miami. Your mustache is almost down to your chin for a goatee. Soon it'll be creeping across my face. All right.

That ends your turn? Like an angry caterpillar. I guess so. Yeah, two attacks? Can I move away since he's grappled? Uh, he's not currently grappled, I would say. It's just held against the wall. It's used to control things and pull it too.

Oh. You can still move away if you want. We'll just take a swipe at you. I'm gonna stay right there. Okay. Trinket's cheering you on. In the back wall. Thanks, Trinket.

Pursy. Percy. Is it true that if we can't kill it except with sunlight? Sunlight and water. You're not entirely certain. You know that sunlight's very damaging to it, and you have, from the research, know that vampires have certain levels of power,

as opposed to dying and due turn to a missed form and attempt to retreat. So weak vampire is might. I'm just gonna hack at his neck with my sword a couple times. I wrote all that stuff down. I just need to find it. Vampire. 28. 28 hits.

I'll roll the other two really quickly. 22. It's. 22. All right, all three hit. So that's... Oh, that'd be smart. Seven.

Ten points. Uh, 15 points. All right. Ten points. Got it. All right, so you slam the rapier three times into its body, leaving these large, gaping wounds.

It's looking like it's hurt, and its eyes are darting about, kind of gauging its chances. That'll be your turn unless you wish to move. I'll back away from it. Okay, so you back there. As you back away, it sees the opportunity and reaches out with applause towards you. That is nine. That does not get.

I'm gonna just really quickly also do a second win just to start picking up. Okay. Should we ask it questions or something? Does it talk? I think we should probably just kill it too. Okay. All right.

Nice. All right, that ends your turn, Percy. Scaling you're up. I'm up? Oh, I'm not ready. Okay, can I see it? Well, I guess I don't need to see it. I'll just, can I see it?

Yeah, right there. Okay. You're right there. Can I do this? I will just, I'll just taunt it. I will use vicious mockery on it. Yeah. And I'll just say,

Bringing out the big guns. What's up? What's up? What's up, Toothy? Hey, bite me. That's it. That's all I do. Okay.

It's 3D4. That it is. That was about 3D4 worth. That's all I got. Wasn't ready. What's up, Toothie, bite me. Oh, man. It's a, I think it's a wisdom.

There we go. some saving throw. Oh, you're missing with this. No, I does not make it with a six. But his singing skill makes it very bassy and full. Yeah. Okay, so you casting is at third level? What's up to your level?

Because I'm, because I'm a level. You are correct. Yeah, it is 3D4 damage. It does take it, and it has disadvantage on its next attack rule. I mean, can I do it at an even higher level? No, no, I was supposed to get it. It's 3D4. That's it.

Yeah, go for it. Four. Two. Two. Eight. Eight points. How do you want to do this? I mean, that's how I want to do it.

I just, I want to do some pelvic thrusting all I'm saying. Bite me! Bite me hard! Bite my motherfucker, bite me! Bight me! Urine flying everywhere. Oh shit. I forgot.

Oh, there's urine everywhere. My mustache is falling off. It's terrible. So, as it's trying to take its chances, it turns to go and flees, he's grog, looks over, and hears, you're going, hey, too, that looks over back. you. One of the weaknesses of a vampire is running water. Oh! Technically, it needs to be a large amount of running water, but this creature is on death's door. And based on the fact that it is right on the edge of passing out anyway,

the bit of your... Constellation, your rhyme. Yes. Streaks across the front of the vampire as it turns around and Grog just, distinct slams it with a hammer and smashes it into the guy. It's hard to say which killed it? You're pretty sure it was you. I, I don't. Good job, Scanlon. High five.

Not until you wash. Stress ball. Yeah. Which for the record, as you high five him, there is a bit of spatter across your hand. Future reference, the fog, the fog is bad. Not totally natural. Oh, there's no gnome like our gnome.

Oh my God. Seriously, go, put your dick away. I was, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, please don't judge me. It's morning, it's cold. It's also unseasonably cold in here. That's why it's so small. Don't judge me.

So newsflash, the fog is bad. We probably need a new hideout. We probably gave away our location. No, no, we killed them all. He just rolled and died. You should probably get the fuck out. Yeah. How long?

What time is at? Midnight. Right now it's close to, it's a little after midnight. So we have not had a full rest. No, we've got a half night. Let's have a full rest. Okay. Really?

Yes. We're gonna go to sleep here? They don't know where we are yet. We killed them. Let's do it. What if they have some sort of psychic communication? And what if this is their spawning ground? What if the sun tree is their spawning ground?

Can I do like some sort of check to see if the sun tree is their spawning down? Infected somehow? Go ahead and make an intelligence check. Just a straight intelligence check? Yeah. That's a natural one. Yay. Hey, that's what I ruled when I was trying to check things. It's hard to say you don't understand a lot of the nature of undead.

It's not your forte. And things have been weird around here. You have no idea. Here's what we're gonna do. I've got one silver piece right here. I'm gonna flip it. Heads. Wait.

Did you grow that mustache for tonight? Yes. That's awesome. It was a goatee. I scanned five hours ago. and now it is an arrow-flame the mustache. Thank you. Really good.

Thank you. We'll discuss it a break. I'm gonna flip this coin because that's all we fucking got. If it's a 20, we're gonna stay here. Okay. If it's a one, we're gonna find another place. Sure, fuck it, leave it up a chance. We find another place.

Shit. All right. That's so stupid. Can we tunnel our way to the, to the... Let's tunnel, let's tunnel. I don't want to go up. No, yeah. Redue my...

No, you can't tunnel. I can't. I can't. I believe. What I did. This episode is brought to you by Netflix. Most valuable promotions in Netflix are hosting a blockbuster triple headliner Saturday, May 16th. Rhonda Rousey returns to face fellow woman's MMA pioneer Gina Carrano in the main event.

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on YouTube.com slash the Glass Cannon with the podcast version dropping the next day. See what everybody's talking about and join us in the dark. of my natural energy during that sunbebe. It's still night though. We've had a short rest. We've got to get out of here.

They know we're here. It's night. We can't travel at night. I know. You're a badass. There's vampires. Yeah, we step outside. It's game on.

It's supposed to down here on the hole. I still say I think we're safer down here. At least there's only so many places they can attack from. But the coin said we should go. I'll stick that coin up there. That's fine. You know, when you went to get to get to down that cavern that one time that worked out really really well so let's do what she says wait you know are you talking about when Clorota and I came back with

Chlorota yes yes yes yes he helped us he did help us quite a while is that what you're talking about yeah you know right probably wouldn't have defeated Kavan without him yeah you're you're right you're right Baxe let's stay that's very open to interpretation until you betrayed us and try to eat Scallon's He's fine. I'm agreeing with the women because I want to live to see the woman. I still think Clarota was a pretty good guy. Shut.

I liked him. I think he had a, if we get one more, we decided. He was unfortunate. All right. We stay. We stay. We're stupid.

No or not, we'll be fine. What if we went up above ground and went into like the second floor? How about this? So we're not underground. All right. Sure, let's do that. Oh, I mean.

It's no good either. Was there two stories? There was. There is. I technically used my hallucinatory terrain spell to make it look like a one-story tavern. What about this? What about this?

That's true. How about we don't sleep in the tunnel? We sort of barricade that up and we just sleep in the cellar. Not the tunnel, the cellar. Not the tunnel. The cellar. All right, let's do it. It's fine. Back and to the left.

Back and to the left. Can we bury it? The barricade the cellar somehow? That I can do. I'll do a wall of stone. All right, we're in the cellul. We're very, very packed in. It's nice and cozy and warm.

It is, and you're surrounded by a number of bottles of wine. And bare thoughts. Yeah. And all the wine we stole a lot. We still a lot. Can we pop up in a bottle of that wine? And try and relax. Yeah.

Yeah, we can. I guess I'll allow it. Doesn't happen. Okay. You pop up in a wine. Share a bottle. You all manage to find your way back to sleep. taking this watch now?

We now have 17 expensive ass bottles of the watch. I'll go with bats, because I haven't been yet. Okay, so you two take the next watch. I stay awake because I don't want them to be alone. All right, the three of you, take this watch. Half-El's, what, what? I go back to sleep. Half-elves, what, what?

Hello, my half-elmbrother's. All right, a few hours of- Let's get jiggy on this watch. You need to sleep, Keyliff. You need to destroy your spells. Gerald is speaking. The crazy guy is talking. Gerald, thank you very much.

Yeah. I haven't played. SIGIL. I haven't played that game. Is your name Solid Snake? Oh, the. Both of you. Q. Internet rage.

All right, so after you guys take your watch, seeming no incident. Although some awkward conversation and a few jabs here and there. Final watch, who's taking that? Mm. I've already watched. I got to sleep. Not me.

You need to sleep. I'll do it, I'll do it. I'll do it. Trinket stays awake with you, too. Okay. And Trinquet does like staying right with Grog. They both understand each other very well on a very feral and unintelligent level.

We play hand slaps. Phaas, ah, fuck. Flaws catching everyone. Into the wee hours. Okay. Eventually, everyone's managed to gather your evening's rest. You come to consciousness, the cold morning greets you. No seeming further incident in the cellar.

Oh, thank God. I would like everyone to make a wisdom chest. No problem. Oh, good. Hey, does my... Wisdom saving or wisdom versus wisdom? Wisdom saving throw. Wisdom saving throw?

Yes. Oh, right, because we've been in a cursed land for a while. Does my... Does my... Thing help me? My... Thing help you? I have some thing.

The cube? Your jack-ball trains? No, shit. I'll find it, don't worry. Come back to it. Okay. Seventeen. Seventy.

I love it. Oh, no. What is this? Wisdom? Wisdom saving throw. Advantage. There you go. Fourteen. Okay.

Uh, Kila. 24. All righty. Is he? Okay. Oh no, Percy. You don't know. Oh, God, look at that smirk on his face.

Oh, God. Fuck you, Matt. So as you all come to consciousness, I would like you to put another point of corruption on your sheet. Oh no, how many can you get before you're like totally evil? What is, what does that mean? No. Now what?

I'll tell you in a second. Are I still coughing? Oh, no. You're coughing. Okay. So you guys, all come back to consciousness. Yeah. Cold morning greets you. Food probably is gonna be in order pretty soon. You guys didn't get much of a meal the evening before,

and you're all still a little sore from the eating's rest. You push through you and recover from your exhaustion from your frenzied rage. Thank you. Ring of mind shielding is what I was going to say. Okay, that mustache is getting very iffy. I don't know what you're talking about. I will crack out.

Do we want some dried food rations? We might have to bust into the rations. Didn't we take some? Well, there's probably dried food in this cellar. I have a ton in the back. Yeah, can we do a check to see if there's any, like, jerky or anything in this cellar? Didn't we already searched the cellar?

You guys look through, you found some jerky. We found some jerky. Yeah. Let's eat the jerky. Serviceable, not the best, but serviceable. All right. Um, Going forward,

uh, these sadistic tendencies The artistic tendencies that you've been exerting through a lot of this event are becoming harder and harder to control. Be mindful that when you strike to kill, you strike to torture before you do. That's so cool.

I mean, terrible. Is he the only one that was affected this time again? Yep. Everyone else rolled above a 10. Yeah. Eleven. I have a very low wisdom, and I rolled really badly. All right.

So, you finish your meal. Looking outside, a little bit of the windows you can see, since you covered them all with cloth, there's a little bit of daylight peeking through. It's soft daylight. It looks like while it's not raining, there is still a cloud-covered sky. What is your plan of action? I have a question. Yes. By 11 points of permanently lowered hit points from the necrotic damage, can that be healed with a potion or a greater healing? No, no, those hit points will all come back, by the way, guys. Over the night? Over the night, the hit points you lost on your hit point to...

Squirrel snake. What about permanent, I didn't suffer from this, but permanently lower, help? Help. From the bite, that recovers after a long rest. Literally what I did. What about the hit points that were lower? Literally what I just had. Oh, good.

Don't, my brain doesn't work. It's hot in here. We're going to find another house to kill now. I mean, to carefully investigate and third. thoroughly due diligence the heads before we smash them. Scanlon, I think you and I are gonna go see how people are feeling in the town while everybody else looks for a new home. Do we tunneling through this entire city?

I think you are, but if it's the first thing in the morning, I don't think the Briarwoods could have gotten everybody yet, so I think you and I could do like a Fart the Sun act for like an hour. Did you just say Fart the Sun at? Fart the Sun at. Fart the Sun and the Vampire. The sun and the vampires and they're done. Father and son.

Oh, father and son. You and I. Seaming. Because you're little and I'm tall. Yes, yes, yes. Why don't we seem all of us, we can go take a look around while you talked to. Yeah, we gotta find a different spot.

Quickly though, because even though we don't look like ourselves, they know that there are strangers in town. Girl, give everybody a little bit of the dust of tracelessness. And we have the earpieces. What? Do we? Do you? I have one now.

I have one. I have one. Okay. So I'm to Seam us? Yes. As peasants again? Yes. Same peasants, yes.

Different looking. Seaming. Feel me. Touch me. Heal me. Sorry, folks. All right. So we're all peasants.

Got a no barred wizard over here. I'm a cute little boy with a lazy eye. the lazy eye to match my grandma. So there you go. I have the hat of disguise on underneath, just so even if it drops, I'm still not me. Okay, good to know. All right, so.

So are we breaking up, are you two are gonna go scout the town? We're gonna go talk to a few people, right? Yes. Yes. The rest of us are finding a new hideout? Yeah, we're looking for a new hideout. Where should we meet? We've got the earrings.

We've got the earrings, so we'll, once we find a place, we'll let you know. We'll come to you, yeah. Check in every 30 minutes. It's dangerous. Yes. Okay. I like that plan.

What's the safety word? I'll leave that up to Percy. Oh, that's going to say I'll leave it up to you. Meet back here in two hours. That's a terrible word. Too long. It wasn't, hey, hold on. Meet back here in two hours if we haven't heard from everything.

Not good. If everything goes wrong, we meet back here in two hours. Otherwise, just check in every 30 minutes. Do we need a code word? Or why don't we just? Yeah, we need a code word. Yeah, Doritos. It should be, I was thinking Dorito too.

Doritos it is. Apparently it's Dorito. Dorito. I like that. Dorito, a strange elven term for a flatmate. All right, so as you guys press out into the day's sun, we'll... So, what are the groups where you guys are you guys are just splitting up across the city? Oh, right, yes.

Is that a thing? Are we doing? Yes. You and I. This is the dumbest idea, by the way. No, it's the best. Daddy daycare, you and I, we're going to go talk to people. Papa, let's go. Achilith, you and me. All right.

Wait, what about... No, the four of us are sticking together, I thought. All right. And trinket. Your donkey. Trinket, the donkey. Oh, oh, yes. All right.

We're going to the alcove. We're going to the alcove. Okay. Good. So. What was the name of the guy they grog, detunged, and kicked out the window? Kirian. No, no, no, no.

That was box. That was box. Vak. This was Vak. Got it. Vak. So Vak. He is.

Yeah. And I'm sure he told everybody what we looked like. We can't look like the same seeming that we could only tell. He could only tell them what we look like if he's a very clever office. Yeah, but he can write it down. He's really good at charades. But they already know what they look like. He should have broken us fingers too.

Seeming. I know. I know. Did we just say? We didn't. Would I have been smart enough to seem us slightly differently? Based on this conversation happening now, no. You have already transformed everybody into the

transform everybody into the original. Except I gave myself a lazy eye. Except you have a lazy eye, which is different. I don't think it makes a difference. I think there's no new people in this town. They'll see. True, even newer people might be more suspicious. We don't give a fuck we're walking around.

We don't give a shit. Two people got lazy eyes. We got a donkey. Good. Problem. Recognize this. I dare you. I have crazy eyes.

Yeah, you do. Crazy old eyes. They're like, I'm... Just like that. Yeah. But you guys are tunneling around looking for new digs, right? No, we're walking around. I thought you were tunnel. Well, that's up to them.

It's up to you. I thought, I thought, who cares what I thought? Indeed. So, you and Scanlan, can you often... I guess pass without a trace on them before they leave. On all of us. Okay. I don't always hear eyes without a face. All right. There is a radius to it, I believe.

Oh, there is? I have to stay within a certain area of you. I think you should read about spells more. I have my phone back, so I can just look it up right here. I can do it. I would recommend looking up your spells. Oh, within 30 feet of me. Yeah, I was pretty sure it was like... What part of town is the cove?

The alcoat would be on the... We're not trying to be stealthy anywhere. Northwest side of it. She's not even here, you're with me. Northwest? Gavrash, come on. I swatim as hard as I came in back in the head. Let's go.

Boom! Nadia, Jesus. So come to you guys in a moment. The four of you head off towards the alcove. Heading out into the day, the cloud cover is pretty thick. There is just a general moisture and mist to the air. It probably could rain any second. You continue moving towards the northwestern side of the town.

You do notice comparison to previous days, there is a little more energy to the streets. People seem to be moving back and forth with hustle business. You do also say as you head on your way out there is still a slight bit of smoke slowly blooming up from the house in the distance. What minor embers were not put out by the rainfall, it's still a little bit of tray smoke. Was it the north, the east of the west mammoth that we? That was the eastern. Eastern mannick. Yeah, that one is partially burned now. So as you can

you're heading northwest, you eventually make your way to where you recall the alcove was. Now, when you get there, it's a relatively plain-looking building, made dark woods. There's a sign out front that says the alcove. It's old, the metal that holds it, the sign has rusted a bit. The doors are open, and as you push into the building, it's largely empty and seemingly unkept comparatively to previous oddity shops you've been to. Many books about a chantment look left out on one of the nearby tables, partially read and abandoned, as they're being put through. And then as you look across the room behind the counter, there is a young girl in her late teens, a blonde waif of a girl who's currently thumbing through a book and notices you guys enter. Oh, hi.

Can I help you? Yes, we're looking to buy a few things. and we were wondering, actually, I used to do business with Simon. Is Simon around? Simon was called away for a special project by the Briar Woods about six months ago. He told me to look over to the store while he's gone,

so I'm sorry, we're mostly out of stock. We don't have much here at the moment. He was called away on a special project. What sort of special project? I don't know. He lives in the castle now. He would visit every week or so, He hasn't been back in almost a month. I'm a little worried.

He lives at the castle. He lives at the castle. Oh. Did he ever tell you about any details of this special assignment? No, unfortunately. He was the real enchanter here. I'm just trying to do my best to learn what I can

while he's gone. Eh? Speak up, girl. I can't hear you. I'm sorry, miss. I'm sorry. I'm Jordana. I'm Simon's daughter. Hello. Did he like the Briar Woods?

She kind of gives you a look and looks about the room for a moment. The Briar Woods have been very fair and just rulers of this. I'm trying to look straight at her but I'm really looking like that direction and over there. She's gathered as much and is seemingly off put by the whole presentation. The Briar Woods are just and fair and we should not speak ill of them. Don't speak ill of them in public. Oh. Can we, can somebody say if there's something

I'm watching? Yeah, can I do like a perception check around the room and see if there's any indications that like the Briar Woods might have like a bug? Monitoring. Yeah, like a bug. Like an insect. Like a, like a, like some sort of something

where they might be monitoring this place. A small electronic device. electronic device used for a megaproception chip. A bouquet of flowers. Hidden in the. Not bad. 26. Looking around the room, there doesn't appear to be any specific devices installed, whether

magical or otherwise, that would pertain to immediate sign of. No blue proof. Yeah. Leaning girl. She leans in a little bit, goes, hold on. And she kind of runs off behind the counter, heads back, and closes the doors behind where you guys enter. heads back and gets behind the counter. I'm sorry. I don't recognize any of you,

and you're bringing up rather dangerous statements. So, what can I help you with? I'm... You don't have much, and she reaches down and pulls out a couple of small glass vials, simple healing potions. You can already see you've worked with these type of things before. We're actually looking for something a bit more complicated and a little more dangerous.

She pulls up a small metal rod. One of these. I don't know what that is, but let me show you. I'm going to walk over to the wall, find a dusty, dusty wall, and I'm going to trace the symbol on the wall. She gives a look, and... It's dangerous to draw that around here, sir. I'm going to wipe it away. She gets a little more comfortable as soon as you do. What are you doing here? doing here?

We're hoping that we could purchase a brief amount of sanctuary. Here? Why? We need to keep moving so that they don't catch us. The Briarwoods are after you. Why would you read with that? I can't have you here to bring them right to me.

Dear, dear, dear, dear, dear, dear, dear. The Briarwood's on after us, they're after everybody. Eh? Eh. What we need, is a place to stay that we know is protected. Make a situation normal. Eyes, eyes.

80, 16. 8060? 8060. Yes, big number. It's a very large day. Can I try and pour on top of it, or is there? I'd say no, not at this point. You're the one that originally spurned her worry.

So she kind of gives it. If I'm going to let you stay here, I need to know more about what what it is that you're trying to accomplish here, raising the symbol of Dorolo's. I've never seen any of you in this city before in my life. Do you miss the Dorados, dear? Anything's better than this misery. Well, a couple Dorolos. We may not know some. No big deal. That's true. She kind of shakes her head and foolish minds. The rolls have been dead for five years. Not all of them. Really?

I can't drop the seeming. No. You're stuck? Just drop that fat name of yours, buddy. That's true. Only one person would know the entire name of of Percival Dorlo. Do you know the full name of Percival Dorolo? I was wondering if you were about to do it.

No, I'm asking. Can you do it? Yeah, it's Musseldorf, Musketeer. Percival Sanchez Vicario. I'm sorry. D'Olo the Third. The Mena, the Pinta, the Santa Maria. Percival von Musil.

Garol. Goro. Wichdenstein. Kevin Dorlo the Third. Kevin Dorff, Wesley Snipes. I love you all so much. Magneto. De Rolo the Third.

Goroly the Third. Chiquity's satious. This moment of tension with Jordana awkwardly staring at these all very intently looking dirty peasant with a donkey, just talking about names. Simon Wisk was a good friend. This was a good friend to Percival, Frederick, Stein, Kowalski, and Thumbysk to roll of the third. That's it.

Fusel Preciouss and Kowalski to roll with the third. Percival Frederick von Stein. You can call him Percy. Percival lives, and he's coming. Make persuasion roll. And one that you're not sure that nature is. Take these, and she pushes them ahead to you. How many?

Not much. Two regular healing potions. greater healing potion. She explains the metal thing. She says, that I'm going to put them in my chest. It picks it up and kind of like clicks part of the metal cusp of it and it kind of stays in the air on its own. Oh my god, it's another rod of holding. Or a movable rod, but yes. Removal rod, that one. No, I was combining bag of holding in the immovable rod. It's a movable rod.

It's a rod. It's another removable rod. It's a rod. It's a rubber and then another ring. One greater healing, too regular. It's like a ladder rung that you can put wherever you want and hang on it. Did we ever have one of them? And then one that I don't know what it has.

Yeah, we did. What happened to it? Um, I don't, Tiberius put it somewhere and it never came up. You put it on the magic carpet? He might have. Okay. Tiberius had one and we didn't use that much. He's a mysterious motherfucker.

All right, so she pushes it all. The world of Sonic the Hedgehog has been thrust into a not so dark, not so stormy hard-boiled detective story that probably nobody saw coming. Follow Sonic and the Intrepid Chaotic's detective agency as they take on their biggest case yet. This high-flying action-packed adventure will take them across the world, fighting for every clothing they can fight. It's one heck of a tale, which is good, because this story might be the only thing that can save their lives. Well, if that's all, I can just dispose of you.

Wait, what? All will be revealed in. Sonic the Hedgehog presents the Chaotics Case Files. Listen now, wherever you get your podcasts. You know that feeling when you hear one interesting thing, and suddenly you want to know more. Well, that's the idea behind my podcast, something you should know. Every episode starts with a question you've probably never thought to ask,

like why people do or don't like you, why certain habits stick, or what everyday advice is actually wrong. I'm Mike Rothers, and I talk with scientists, authors, and experts, and I keep it practical, surprising, and fun to listen to. If you've got a curious brain, come try one episode of something you should know. On the podcast app, you're listening to right now. You guys, Chris? I have practically known, I can't be of much help.

I'm not a fighter. I'll take the rod. All right. I will make sure that you are compensated when this is over. Can we sleep here for the night? Follow me, and she leads you to the back. And there's this very, very small room that looks like it used to be her father's room. It's kind of dusty.

Most of it's been untouched, except for the bed. She kind of walks, this is all I have to offer. It's not much, but it's available. Is it safe at night? As safe as anything is here. Just don't go outside. What does the ceiling look like? It's about, I'd say, nine feet up rafters, maybe about two feet of rafters.

It's very simple, very plain. That's what we need to be tonight. Oh, good call. When we were in the branches. Can I insight check her and see if she seems to be true. Sure, go for it. I never know which one. It's too much pressure to choose.

That was the wrong one. I chose poorly. 13. Okay. It's hard to tell. She's young and she seems definitely earnest and plain with her forthrightness. Yeah, there doesn't appear to be any sort of reception.

We are allies. With us comes change. Keep our secret. A secret, all the better would be for it. It's kept, but I recommend talking to Keeper Yenan if you haven't. He's one of the social centerpieces of the remaining good folk in this city. We have spoken to him, we will speak to him again today. His reach is far.

He'd be the one to talk to. Don't stay here long. That will draw attention. Also, we're going to have two more staying. with us if that's okay. One's a child, though, you won't even notice it. Your shoulders slumped a little bit. Just like, all right. I'll prepare as best I can. She starts reaching over and just pulling these thin blankets out from a nearby cabinet and kind of... No? Good, good day, good day. Everyone, let's meet over at the ladies' chamber once you're

finished with your business. All right, now you guys. Is that here? Yeah. I'm dragging you along by the scrub of the air. Oh, please. Shut up. I'm tired. Looking for, I'm gonna look for just anybody walking by. Is there anyone nearby? After about a minute or so walking,

you do see what looks to be a young man carrying a satchel over his shoulder. It looks like it's filled with a few small pieces of parchment that are rolled up, and he's in a brisk walk somewhere. I walk right up to when I awkwardly put a hand on his chest and I make sure that I flip my pencil and spit as I talk and say, I need a hard drink. I need a hard drink right now.

Where? So if you're looking for a drink, any kind of points over down the road, and he's really put off by it and is trying to keep his face out of your breath. You're going to look for the journey's end. Two blocks down that way to the right. It's not much of business during the day.

I spit at his feet and I pulled Scanron by the ear. Come on, you shit. Oh, cold child protective son. As you walk away, you hear mud under his breath. What's this world coming soon? And he continues on his brusque face. So I'm following his directions and going there. Journey Zone, yeah. Get on under the Journey Zen Tavern. It's pretty baron. You walk inside. There are two employees. One who's behind the bar and is currently just reading through a book. The second is currently pouring a drink for the one patron that's in there. It looks to be, kind of slovenly looking gentleman who's sitting in a table drinking his woes away

as he's currently going through what looks like a ledger of some kind. And there is a tavern employee with an apron on who he's this kind of younger red-headed boy who is trying to fill a flag in and all this gentleman at the table is kind of cursing at him to the side. Other than that, it's empty. Empty. How many in here? Three. Three. Wow. All right. I pull.

Jimmy John after me and sit down next to one of them. My name is Tad. Shut up. Tad. Mother's gonna kill us both. And I, uh, uh, uh, two. Two here. And one of him.

Uh, okay, we'll be right back and he walks off, a little confused. I'll have one of what he's having as well. Ha ha ha ha, that's cute. Water it is. He's walking off. I swat him in the back of the head for the bartender to see. The patron now, a closer look.

Man in his late 40s has kind of a protruded jaw line, kind of a little bit of an underbite, thinning brown hair, and he just got some smears of dirt in his face. It looks like he's been crying. And it's just kind of slumped over the table, looking over this ledger. He slams it shut as you sit down. The very, very loud,

glances the side along towards you and says. What the fuck you doing coming and bothering a man in the middle of his meal? Earn a living in this land? Come out from a mile out, a town. Been trying to grow fucking carrots for these fucking people. Can I earn a living? Tell you. Ain't no living to be had and watch down these days.

It's nothing but misery. Something's got to change here. I can't live. I'll give him what they want. I can't feed him. It's true. We're supposed to do here. I haven't eaten in three days. As the worst fucking par.

As you know that there's always an easy exit. What? What? Well, you think the folks who've taken their life at this point? You think that's the end, but no, not in this town. No, I just get right back up the next day. Oh God, it's walking dead town. Talking about the hopelessness. There is no escape of its misery. Either you try and stay alive and exist in this bullshit or you die and become one of them.

I've been trying to find a way out of this city for months now. But they're always watching. I take a huge drink of the mug in front of me. The fucker is out of town. Everything gonna have them, mate. Sorry. I have a friend named Kevin. He says there is someone trying to do something about it. He says that that's what calls that fire yesterday.

over at that big fancy house. He says there's rebels afoot. I take the mug that I have and I pour the rest of it out on this little one's head and say you speak when you're spoken to. No, no, no, it's okay. Let the boys speak. The men are talking.

I'm sorry for pardon. Let your boys speak. What were you saying? I'm just saying what I overheard. My friend Kevin, he's truthful. When he lies, his Papa beats him, so I believe him. He said that someone really strong and took out someone who was at that big, fancy house

that was all aflame the other day. He said that there's lots of them, and that they're gonna free us all from this hell we live in. Make, oh man, that's a layered check. A persuasion and a dissaction roll, back-to-back. Perchusation. Oh my God, this is terrible. Wait, two rolls?

Yes. It was that good. Persuasion and deception. Correct, in that order. You say. Oh, Jesus. Okay, persuasion 39. What?

How? How? Deception 15. Wait, or 29. 29. It's a lot. It's probably 20. What's your bonus to? No, no, it's 16 plus 13. Okay, so 29. That's 29. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry.

All right. Kenne gives you a stern look. Oh. Well, it'll be nice for a change. There'd be someone up to. Fucking fight for this shit all over place. I start fake weeping into my cup. He goes, oh, no, no, no, no. No need for that. Gonna make me lose my appetite. You need to sound of a real man crying.

Chin up and he takes and flicks a coin at your face. Oh, fuck. Look, if what he's saying's true, and we got some sort of savi in making the way into town. Well, let's hope they're at least a little more prepared than the last ones. The last ones? What, the uprising three years ago. Are you new to this fucking town?

Three years ago, Papa wouldn't... Papa wouldn't let me out of the closet, so I didn't hear much of what was going on. Okay, first and foremost, you've got to treat your boy better. Gonna raise someone no better than the motherfucker's running in Whitestone right now if you keep this up. Did you really puke or did you fake puke? I'm sorry about my papa. He's had such a hard time these last few. years, our crops are not performing well, and he's under a lot of pressure, and well, I think Mama doesn't love him anymore. She's, I'm sorry. We can go. I think you should.

But one thing, if he ever does anything else to hurt you again, you can tell someone. Two, if you hear anything else about this savior coming in a town, go ahead and talk to Trevor rubber there at the edge of the bar. And you see over there there's the guy who's behind the bar with this book. He doesn't even notice all this happening. You know, guy in his mid-thirties, glasses at the end of his nose. His hair slicked back and pulled into a top ponytail. And he's just sitting there reading through his... Go ahead and tell Trevor. Because the rest of us would like to go out in a blaze of glory than living this bullshit.

What was your name, sir? Not important to much, but you can call me Patrick. Thank you, Patrick. Thank you, Patrick. I don't know if my papa has enough money for these drinks. I'm going to insight check Patrick. From the floor? I don't know. I'm fucking faking it, man.

Go for it. All right, that's not that great. This is 17. He seems honest. He's got much to lose. And his interest is piqued, but he's not like wholly invested in this whole idea, but it's definitely caught his attention. Well, it's quite his attention.

Let's get him up, right? Stands up. Reserver grabs you where the arm lifts you up under the stool on the side of the tables. It's up, you. Pat's in the back. You need to soap her up. Drink the water you got for your boy there.

Yeah. Get your ass out of here. Come on, Papa, let's go. I turn around and I just take the rest of his drink. And as he pulls me away, and I sort of, you know, You know, slovenly, after my turn back for a second, and I just completely sober up. I was resumed. What do you say? What do you say? I didn't even hear. He kind of gives a keen glance and nods slowly as you walk away.

Looks over at the bartender for a second. And then you exit the building. All right. You guys all convene at the ladies' chamber. Walking to the outside, the other day there were a few folks walking into the courtyard today, there is a group of about 25 people, all different dress from what would be considered a white stone middle class, the few there are, to a number of other peasantry farmhands and other folks who just look destitute by nature of existence here, all gathered in the amphitheater and it appears to be a relatively hushed sermon

or discussion currently going on by Kieperianen. Let's not make ourselves known. I want to see this. I want to hear what's up. Sit in the back. Okay. Sit in the back. He begins talking a while about, a long tangent. Speaking of, you know, this land once cherished as a burning light in a beacon of good existence, of kinship, of honesty and loyalty dragged down to the muck. by the imposition of darkness, the return of the evil that once scourged this land. Now, given new faces, they pushed us down, and his hope crumbles. The light peeks through once again,

for whispers have come to my ears, friends. That this unrest now has a name. I'm sure you've seen it, the fire atop that building this morning. He watched as one as your oppressors was cut from his high throne, one of his close advisors, scarred, tortured, shown the strength of this hidden ally, of us, the oppressed peoples of White Stone. He looks up over the group a little bit past the streets, carefully. I have come to believe that perhaps this is the time for us to band together and show our support. Now, the information is still vague, but just keep your eyes open.

Be careful. Be quiet. If things progress, word will find you. Bouses head and says a prayer that none of you speak Celestial. Celestial? I do. You do? I speak Celestial. What?

A prayer that essentially, the essence of the prayer is, by the guidance of the lady, may civilization flourish, and those that keep progression at bay be squashed beneath our feet, which point the sermon kind of breaks and people begin to walk away and scatter. I want to watch people as they walk away and kind of try to read their lips as they're walking away to see if everybody seems like loyal to what he said or if anybody seems a little. Everyone is silent. Everyone is quiet and everyone is looking warily and kind of making their own separate paced exits so it's not to draw attention.

Can we try to memorize their faces of everybody that was here? Okay. You keep as best a mental image of everyone who was passing by. Not too many notable, you know, both they look like, especially where you're from. The peasantry doesn't really interest you visually, but you do manage to gather details of certain scars here and there and people, hair color, age, stuff like that. Did we recognize the guy that was talking? Yeah, that's Keeper. Yeah. Any familiar faces in the audience?

Actually, Scanlan, you and Keyleth both recognize some of the farmers. You guys have all gathered. Oh, we gathered again. Yeah. Okay. You recognize two of the individuals at this were the farmers you initially saw on the outskirts of White Stone when you did your little scouting mission earlier. Cool. When we flew in?

Yeah. Okay. So, you know, from all the people you've encountered, those are the only two that you specifically recognize so far. Okay. But it does appear to be made up of working hands and farmers. Yeah. The foundation of the city that have been so long impressed. I elbow Percy, I go, do we talk to him?

I think we do. Maybe he talks to us. Try and catch his attention. Okay. You can see as he begins putting out some of the incense, burn his looks over in the seas. Oh, yes, yes. You return, please.

Follow me. And he steps outside of the amphitheater and around the back of it. We'll follow. Okay. Around the back of the amphitheater, you see there is constructed, attached to the very, very far end of this kind of round half dome. A square brick building, very, very simple. And as he, I show you all inside, it's essentially a tea room. There's a table, there's a tea set up there. There is a small stove in the far end with a little fire burning stove,

And shelves and shelves and shelves arranged with all different manner of small sculptures, metalwork, holy symbols of Arathus that have all been put on display. Each one has a name and carved beneath it, and you recognize this, Percy. This is the legacy of all the keepers of this lady's chamber over time. This is basically kind of a hall of previous keepers. Please, sit. Have tea, if you like, if you're so... interested. We have much to discuss. Sir, I am to believe that these allies you spoke of previously were responsible for this

dastardly attack on Sir Karen. That could be inferred? Well, I've spoken privately with a number of the remaining community leaders of our town. They are unconvinced. Understand, this isn't the first an insurrection has been attempted, and much sorrow was endured after previous failures. We keep hope best we can, but without a solid plan. They are sending the rest of our able-bodied into the abyss. What happened last time?

Well, in a similar fashion, we had a number of fed-up individuals and decided to finally raise some sort of aggressive act against the castle, attempt to storm it by force. We figured we had the numbers. There are many dangers in that castle that go beyond what we were prepared for. And as such, the few that survived, well, they met the fate most do with the Sun Tree these days. So we've been remiss to put ourselves in a similar position for many years now. To make that as worse, our informant within the castle has gone silent this past few weeks,

and we have no idea the progression of the Briarwood's plot. Was your informant by chance? An informant by chance name Simon? No. Simon has been missing for some time, actually. Who is your informant? I don't know the name. The information comes through, actually. He should be arriving here in just a moment. What did they find underneath?

White Stone. All that we know is they've been rebuilding or repurposing something old and terrible beneath the city. I've only heard whispers ever referred to as the Ziggurat. The Ziggurat. Now, to go into the deep history of this city as you are outsiders, legend speaks of a seed that the sun tree was placed by Pelor himself to seal a wound in the light, and white stone rose around it. The fable has long been told, but ever since those fiends took the city, their interest beneath the city has kept me thinking on this fable. It leaves me very unsettled.

And as the sun tree slowly died, so did our confidence. Further, at which point the door across the room opens. And another enters the room. A very, very elderly man steps into his ragged robes, straight on his very, very thin, frail form. Oh, we'd get him. Whether his skin is dark and leathery, he's nearly hairless in his head,

and his liver spots all over his scalp, One of his eyes is clattered over in white, and he just kind of shimmies in very slowly. I ask you, strangers, what makes you so sure you can change the tide of this battle? Drop seeming. Drop it. Do I recognize this person? As old as he may be, there is a subtle power and resonance and confidence to his voice, that there's just a force of personality and conviction. that immediately leads you to believe this man was, is or once was, a man of great power and respect. Are there windows in the room? There are two windows. They are currently shut with curtains.

Can I bring the seeming back up? We should show. You, Percy, recognize this man. It was once the chancellor to your father and a long-respected philosopher in White Stone known as Archibald Desne. Arch. Archibald. Was he a good guy? Was you a good guy?

Archibald Deznet? Desne. Desne. It was very much affected, very stern and crotchety at times, but very much aided your family and holding the city together in times of strife. I pull out Sarkerian's notebook, and I hand it to them, and I say, this should be some proof that we mean what we say. Reaches out in as long, it's been really. fingers gonna wrap around the tone, pull it towards him.

So you bring a trinket, that is helpful. But to kill one mortal man is no feat compared to the darkness that lies in that castle. I need more than that. I remove my hat. Can I just drop it on one of us, or do I have to drop it on all of us? I'd say you could drop it on an individual,

if you'd prefer. All right, I will drop Percy's Seaming. Okay. There's the slamming sound as the tome is holding hits the floor. Hello, Archie. Percival. Sweet Percival. Not so sweet these days. I did not think you would have lived. I thought you had perished in the subjugation. Percival, I... You have no idea the joy this brings to my heart and he reaches out and kind of like just touches the edge of your face like he's still in disbelief. Your hair, it seems age is caught up to you as well. It was difficult leaving.

You see a smile creep across this very, very tense old man face. And he kind of looks about the room with the renewed energy that wasn't there before. My friends are strong. With you here, Percival, we've two Dorolo spearheading a rebellion. We have the guiding light the people need. Who else survived? We must succeed, Percival. If this fails, there won't be anyone else.

there to rise up. They nearing their goal, according to your sister, Cassandra. We haven't much time with her sister-le-es-person. Oh, shit! She survived the attack, and was taken as the personal assistant or slave of the Briar Woods, and used as an example, a symbol of their dominance. She's been feeding us information for years.

Whenever she could, and she was the helping guide, the last two of the last two of her. attempts we've made we've not received her letter for her in weeks now but no you're not the only surviving member of your family I will talk to your people I will talk to mine we'll have you militia guide us Percival Frederick Stein von Musil Kuaski de rollo with her wow wow I've rid us Oxmarkina

oh you know who we are Oh, how does he know? I don't know. Jesus. How are you? Of us, have information from all over these lands.

We've had a few friends come from Emon over the past couple years. They met some direns, but just don't think that we haven't heard of your exploits. Help us bring a darn back to this land. You may have a plan. How fair is Professor Anders? Professor Anders. It's been lost to us since before.

for the interruption. He has a man taken by what promises the Briarwoods have given him. What little he's shown his face in this town is not the man he once was, or at least the man we thought he was, was never who he truly claimed to be. He lives in the house in the east, house in the north. He lives in the castle of the Briarwoods as well. This is Anders? Lady Ripley lives in one of those mansions. She did. There have been reports in recent days that she's been quick to pack. You know not where she resides now.

What happened to the... who lives in the third... third house. Here. It takes a moment to think of which house you're referring to. Burnt one of them. Yes, you did. The house... There's currants. house, then there are two other homesteads of the new nobles, one of which is currently held by the Duke, he says with disdain, Koron Vedmire.

Quagmire? Megmire. Medmire. He's supposedly been put in watch of the temple of Pelor, but he's left that to ruin. The other home houses Count Tileri, another sadistic man who oversees the Timber production of White Stone. The what production? Timber.

Timber. Is that the house that the Countess was briefly residing in? Briefly. Count Tigiri? Taileri. Taileri. Tili. Are these, uh,

how are these men, the Duke and the Count, uh, what do the people think of them? The briarwoods, when they took white stone, they did not take it alone. They came to this land with a small army of cutthroats, mercenaries, cell-sorts. They brought over from whichever the forsaken land they came from. Each one of those men that proved to be of utmost use to them in that rebellion, they were given titles of nobility in hope stents. They were given responsibilities over the land, people beneath them.

Only assume that was part of their payment for their service. But they're just thugs who were particularly successful. As far as I know, yes. Are they supernatural? Are they undead? Not to my knowledge. If we were to continue working our way up this totem pole, which of the two is less powerful? Or which of the two is reviled most?

Yes. What would start an uprising? Count Tileri, is known for being quite the sadistic individual, beaten, torturing his servants, sometimes publicly, just to show his hand to those who would cross him. He would definitely be a message to send if though, Owen. I have a plan. Just call us. I've got one too. Kill him. Well, that's part of the plan. I would warn, the longer we wait making these messages as well, the stronger we build the support of the city, but also the more warning and preparation time we give to those

in the castle. So, the choice is yours. Against the Brywans? No, no, no, no. Count Tyrealee. Oh. Here's my plan. Which the name Tauleri catches your ear to memory. If you recall your captive back at at Grace called Keep, was previously the owner.

of the driver of the Briarwoods, Desmond, the one that beat him senseless until eventually or Briarwood saw this and then took him as his own driver. No, we're going up there. I'm just a small boy, but we've seen mists at night, strange things that come out when the sun goes down. Are those focused around a central area of town, or are those everywhere? The mists are a means of intimidation. It's merely a magical precursor to the undead minions of the Briarwoods. They slink through those mists, use them as cover.

If you see it, run. Thank you. We heard about green fog here. Is that something? From the castle, yes, there are vents in the garden. What was once the garden. You know not the nature of these vents or what is being utilized to produce this. foul, noxious odor, but it has put a scent on this city for many years.

Would it be what's killing? Do we know what killed the tree? We know not. And in your time, do you know anything about Lady Delilah? What she is. A few times she's walked this city, it's been a procession of power. She seems to enjoy the attention. She's a vain. She's a vain one, that one. Who is this?

Lady to lie. Lady Delilah. Does she come out during the day? She hasn't an almost a year. But before. Yes. She walks in the sun. Unlike her husband?

Unlike her husband? Yes. I don't think she's a vampire. I don't think she's a vampire. I think she's a bitch. What do you think of a distraction? What kind of distraction? What if there was a way to start

Ruckus, the Fagmire Estate, start a fire, maybe start ruckus of some kind. The Nygmire estate? The third house. Dukes. The Duke. The Duke. They're going to be waiting and expecting us, so if they think we're attacking one of the houses and then instead we attack the other while everyone's rushing to deal with what they think is the next attack. I like it.

We attack the second home, and then when they prepare for us to attack the third home, that's when we attack the castle. Okay. I like it. All right. Which one of us goes? Wait, you want to do all, you want to go bam, bam, bam, bam. No. Today is just one.

We've already dropped one. The next attack will be on the briro. Next attack. He's saying, create a distraction. We make a big stink on the house we're not going into. That I'm cool with. Percy, how much do you want people to

see the DeRolo family crest? How much do you want people to know of your present? Do you want a big proclamation? Yes, I see. Because I might have that. Will it put my sister in danger? It's hard to say. They don't know that I know she's alive.

Perhaps keep her just to surprise me. That symbol is not the Dorolo family seal, is it? It's modified. It's... It's a part of it. It definitely... It is known. It is known. It is a tough... It's a tough decision.

The symbol does carry the weight of the people. It's a tough decision. It does carry a beacon of hope, but it, as you said, may put your sister in danger. It's hard to say. Choice is yours on how you wish to use it. Yes. Yes? Because I learned a trick back in the day from my father and the Arashari people. We used to do it just as kids for fun, but it might be perfect in this circumstance. I did it a little in college.

little in college, it's fun. With the wand in your... Is it. Dual wielding. I can skywrite for you. That sounds festive. How do you mean? Like a giant sparkler.

Kind of, yeah. You know, in the future they came up with these awesome things called... Nope, nope, nope, nope. Like sky right with clouds, fire, like Skywriting with clouds. Oh. Like a fog.

You control the clouds. I can write the clouds. Can actually make letters out of them? Yeah. That's crazy talk. I can draw in clouds. Can you clear out clouds then if you can do that? Can you make these gray clouds go away?

Do we want the great clouds to go away? Well, sunlight would be nice as opposed to this misty sort of fog. That's a good boy. Uh, maybe temporarily. Yeah, controlling weather on that scope is... It's, yeah, it's big. You can alter elements of it, and like, you could write, you get darken elements of the clouds to form a message or a symbol if you were like, but actually removing the clouds. So that would be.

Right, yeah. Can you poke a hole in them? Temporarily, yeah. I'll remember that. Temporarily. Let's go pick a fight with a house. Long enough to poke a hole, but I mean. From a distance so that we can get to.

Pick a fight with a house from a distance, we can get to the other house and pick a fight with it. Is there one? One, just one of us who can make a big stink at the decor house. I can probably make a big stink. You can definitely make a big stink. You can catch up through one those little do-ways. I could, oh, you know what? Please, it's big for me.

How about this? I use one of my exploding arrows you gave me. Oh, those are so cool. Save those for a person. But it's a good range to stink. Can you, is there like a big, well? I've got magic missiles. I've got all sorts of shit. I can do stinking clouds. I can make things.

them see things. I can blow open their doors. I can do it. You guys go have fun. You can also do this from a distance and we can get you as far away as so you can do both. I'll start on the distraction. You guys to go start fucking shooting. And I'm going to give you a second arrow as well. Huh? Of what? The arrow? Okay. The arrow.

What is it? It's a question mark arrow. It's an arrow? Mystery. Write down arrow with a question mark. It looks heavily tinkered. It's a little front load with weight. You know what it will do to the roof if it works.

Okay, cool. It's a kill trinket error. Oh, man, you know what I forgot? Okay, cool. Yes. What? Yeah, no, just. Just don't.

I have thoughts. Cool, have thoughts. Keep them going. Arrow? Arrow. Alright, can we do something now, please? All right, let's do it. I'll head over to the other house.

Show me on the map where it is so I know where I'm going. What time is it? By this point in the day, it's probably around three in the afternoon. You'd rather do this now. When do you want the symbol to go up? Actually, we may not need it yet. That may actually work out well once we've... Let the house is up?

Once it's up, can you actually write up? right in the smoke coming off the house. Yeah, I think I could. Yes, that will do just fine. The crack of thunder, rainfall begins to hit on the city, said. Oh, sure. Really?

Of course. Why is it raining again? Because it's this fucking town. It's fucked. No offense. It won't be fucked soon. Your town's right. That would be greatly appreciated.

So the north, the northern house or the western house? The Northern House is the one that Count Ileary currently resides in. Gotcha. Oh no, I'm just... My apologies. The Northern House is the one that Duke Goren Vedmeyer currently exists in. The other is Count Teilhiri. So this is the mess and this is our actual.

I'm the mess? You're the mess, always. All right. So you'll... So you'll... You'll... You'll... ...heophone me when you're in position?

Let's go quickly. We're burning daylight. So probably from about here. I'm going with Scanlan. Uh-uh. No, no, go with us, Keelanet. If I've said it once, I've said it a hundred times, I don't need help.

I wasn't trying to write, I was trying to write the Dorolo symbol in smoke. I don't, I don't know. You can do it from the other house. Other house? Yeah. They need you. You see smoke.

And he's got to mention door. It's no knots against you. He's going to catch up quickly. The Ranger's sight. And if I die, tell Pike I love her. The Ranger's sight. You won't die. You won't die.

You won't die. You might. I've never seen that before. I'm a little. All right, I'm going with that. All right, so you guys. So we're making very reasonable plans with this. All right, have you put your hat back on?

I have put my hat back on, yes. Because you are very much visibly percy. Not anymore, I'm not. All right. So you, both groups divide, Scanlan heading towards the northeastern house, the rest of you heading towards the northwestern house. Eventually you get to the outskirts of both of both

and you can see the dark clouds in the sky, occasional claps of thunder and flashes of light. Even though it's midday, it's pretty dark right now. And a few folks they're out and about have their heads covered with hoods and are trying to stay under overhangs to stay nice and at least dry as they can. You are all soaked with the bone at this point, just pushing through. Your cough is still setting in pretty heavily at this point too.

You guys make your way to the outskirts of the home. You, Scanlan, skipping along, the boy that did you, that you are with your one weird wandering eye, ta-t-tat-tie-ta-tot-tie-ta. Find your way to the other abode. So, what's the plan? How far is the gate from the front door? It's about, I'd say,

30, 25, 30 feet. And the house that you're looking at right now, it's very, very well-crafted. Looks like it's made from a lot of the fine timber of white stone, the lighter woods and dark woods kind of contrast with each other. stained to show the variation between the two. It's a very beautiful home. Okay. Any guards? Anything around?

Currently, you can see there is one guard visible at the front. That's all you can see at the moment. And if I walk around back, is there any guards around back? There is a second guard in back that is just now stuffing out of an outhouse that is situation behind the building. That would excite you. I don't know why. Sure. Because they haven't phoned me to tell me that. we're ready to go I will just become a dragonfly and just buzz into the dwelling

okay meanwhile the twins looking at our home sizing it up yes all right giving in close eye through the dark rainy atmosphere you can see on both homes the interiors are slightly lit there appears to be individuals at home at least in both homes which you can't see who it is necessarily There was life in the interior. As you turn into a fly and make your way, so the point just walks in. Zoom.

Go and make a stealth check. 10. OK. You turn into a fly, make your way through the bars, and me going to zzz over the yard with your 1 20th of a hit point in fly form. Make your way towards any of the nearby windows all seem to be shut.

the front door is closed. There might be a gap. But the guard is standing in front of the door. Okay. I'll just, again, they haven't phoned me, so I'll just perch on like the handrail or door frame or something just above him and just kind of wait. Okay. He takes notice if you're buzzing as you go by and kind of goes back to just watching the rest of you guys. sizing up the other home, yeah?

Just, yeah? Do you keep it? Oh, how about this? Maybe we can tell Scanlan to set off the thingy. Yeah. I'll come running out as my old crazy lady. Yeah. Saying, sir, the house is under attack.

Yeah. Toward the guards guarding this house. Mm-hmm. And then I'll just kind of stand there as they react. I like it. Could we look at this house first? I thought we did. No.

I thought you want to shoot the arrows at you, no, that's what Scanlon did. What do I see? I'm looking, I'm looking all over this house. Right. This house also well-built sturdy, mostly wood construction, but it's all dark wood. It almost seems to disappear against the gray skies above it

if you're looking from a dominant perspective. It's a very dreary looking home built to look pretty for someone who doesn't like a lot of color. It's two stories. There are a number of windows on both stories. Looks like there is a small, looks to be a garden out front. that has been long ignored and died and dried up.

I just like browns and just abysmal looking. Other than that, there's not much else to say on the building. No guards, no nobody watching. Not currently any guards outside of it, no. I want to go for a circle around and see if I see anything. Stealthy, stealthy, I cast past without a trace on him. And you stay within 30 feet of him? Huh? You stay within 30 feet of him?

I guess I have stealth behind him. All right, both of you guys are stealth. No, oh, no, whoa, no, whoa, do, what should I use? Add 10. Good. 36. Jeez. It's pretty good.

What did you have? Not bend the grass. Oh, 38. Oh, 38. They go, 36 and 38. Boom. They're both discovered and killed. Immediately.

Just like that. You push into one of the nearby alleyways, kind of curve around the side, and make your way to the back portion of this. And it does the gate is, buttressed up against one of the surrounding buildings, looks like a warehouse of some kind, to the point where there's a little bit of space you can get over, but it's about eight feet up,

and it is a spiky top. But looking over, you do see there is one guard that is slowly patrolling around the outside, and you see through the nearby window. It looks like two humanoid that just cross past the front of the window. Two humanites are in the house. There's a guard between the home and the warehouse

that you just described? Correct. Well, circling the house. Basically, you didn't see it from your perspective, once you went around to the alleyway, to the other side of it. but you do see there is one guard that's slowly controlling the outside.

I'll start. You follow. Got it. All right. Should we let Scanlan do his thing first and then we sneak attack him? Set it all in motion. All at the same time then.

On the count of three. What are we doing? What are we doing? Hold on. What? All I heard is on the count of three. What's going on? Scanlan, whatever you're going to do, I want you to get ready to do it.

And then we'll count to three. I will attack. Shouldn't I do mine first? Yes, yes, yes. Tell us when. Oh, you want me to do mine first? Whenever you're ready. How about you wait 30 seconds and go? Got it. All right. I turn into a triceratops. I'm going to say roll an intelligence check. Come on, bet. That's fun.

Intelligence. With advantage, because you're a barn. I don't know where that is. Oh. I gave you an advantage. Roll again. I already get advantage for intelligence. Take it. Take it.

19. Okay. Through your Bardic research and hearing mini tales and seeing scribblings and books of presumably madmen, apparently there were certain creatures that existed long before the civilization had taken root. You have heard of some of these, one of which is the mighty and frightening triceratops. You hear just a fable, but it's kind of fun to pretend to be one. Sure.

Horns and big. And out of nowhere, this tiny fly, swoosh, into a tri-stair tops, boom! Lands and crushing the man beneath you. He's going to attempt to, oh, roll the 20 on his saving throw. Oh, of course he did it fast. So he's only going to take half damage. Go ahead and roll 3D6, crushing damage. 3D6?

Don't even have a D6. Wow. 17. 17. 17. Okay. Did not like that. Okay.

He is crushing. prone beneath you right now. I was, ugh. And for my move, I'd bash down the door. All right. Go ahead and just go to roll on attack. 20? 18.

Okay, yeah. Go ahead and roll into the 3D6. 3.6. That wasn't anything. 9. 9. 7 plus 3. 12 points.

damage, you turn around and the loud, cracking sound, the whole outside of the doorway and most of that side of the room is just thrashed and destroyed. Wood chunks go flying everywhere with a large roar. You see the part of the inside of the foyer collapses from that side of the building. You basically just take out a whole support and start thrashing around. Roe! You hear voices begin yelling out from in the household and immediately five guards start rushing in from different rooms towards you. Okay.

All right, two of which are holding already armed and ready crossbows. We'll give that just a second. Okay. You guys? I'm gonna run up behind the one guard and beat him in the back of the head with the back of my deck.

Okay, go over the attack. He does not see you. This is considered a surprise attack. This is a surprise attack. Oh, that's good. Oh, that's not that good, but so that's 17. That hits. That hits.

All right, and then the, there's no, and then the second attack, We also have advantage is 23. 23. Also hits, yeah. So sneak attack, yeah. So here we go. Is... Pust. Get them, get them, get him, get him, get him.

One, two, three, four. Eight, plus, is 10, 15, 16, 18, and 20. 25 for the first attack. Oh, no, 25 for the first attack, and then... And a sneak attack? That was it. Right. It's a surprise round. Yeah.

Don't you get double damage for being an assassin? Yeah, so 50. So 50, okay. All I want to do is gunk him. Yep. You know, like I do. And that's all you needed. He had like 45 hit points. With one hit to the back of his head, he just crumbles into the ground,

smacking into the wet grass around this field. And I look back and I look over my sister's shoulder and go, Go over the door. Fuck it, arrange. bucket, a rage. Okay. We're just going straight into the house. What are we doing?

We're watching all this happen. We're all like, oh, there goes Groh. You are off because you've said nothing. You guys, yeah. You guys right now watch as now Vax runs over and tells Grog to run it and go after the front door. It's probably trapped. Well, that's not what I said.

I said, do you want to play? No, I took up running. Grog is running to be a little clear. You got to be a little clear. So I look at the gates. Activate the Flaming Warrior. I guess we're going. I guess we're going.

We're going, we're going. Everybody's running at the door. All right, so you just go and roll a strength check just for the hell of it, because there is a closed gate. Can't do the same thing we did last time. Damn it. Athletics would be there. Oh, uh, 14.

14? Okay. It's not immediate impact. Takes you a second. You have to force your way through the gate. You essentially grab the two sides of it and pull and pull until eventually the chain snaps and the bars bend, and you shove off one of the old doors of the gate that just Pran-p-p-p-on-on-on-the-ground before you,

leaving you a straight look to the front door. You just take a bolt for the rest of you guys, kind of give a chase afterward. You all rush to the front door of this homestead. It is currently closed. We saw front door. We saw some sort of warehouse and a side window with two people going, right?

Yeah. Let's flink. Yeah. Let's go in the window. Yeah. I'm in the middle. Yeah, we go in the window. You said there was a door around back.

There's like a door around back. There's like a window around back. I'll go around back. I'll also go around back. Oh, but that's only grog in the front now. He's fine. He'll be fine. Drink it.

Going in with you. Is he going in with him? Do you want to send him in with me? It's going to be nasty, where I'm going. It's all day buffet. He's going in the door. Sink or swim. All righty.

Can we see any of the damage? Is there any smoke rising from the house yet? No, there's no smoke. There's no smoke. There's nothing saying smoke on that point. I'm trying to get a better look and listen as I run close to the window. I understand.

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