Critical Role & Sagas of Sundry - Vox Machina Ep. 59 - The Feywild

Episode Date: January 10, 2022

Vox Machina begin their adventure into the mysterious feywild! They quickly run into an old friend, and make a new one...   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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It was pretty fun. If you guys had an opportunity to check it out, you should. It's up on geek and sundry.com. It's amazing. It was fun. It was very jealous that we couldn't be here to play in it. We were here in spirit, and obviously, motorcycle and sidecar.

So that was kind of fun. What? We'll show you some of the fan art. But anyway, back to this game. Vox Machina, the group of adventurers, who had found their way now seeking the vestiges of divergence of divergence, ancient artifacts of power, to help them in their struggle against the chroma conclave,

the collection of chromatic dragons that have just raised the entire countryside of Taldore. They've acquired a few of them, but the most recent one sends them to the Faywild in search of Fenthrus, a bow which seems to acquired the eyes of Vex upon it. You took care of some business, managed to ward off an assassination attempt by Rakhasa,

and found your way through Keelith's plane shift spell into the Fay Wild, somewhere in the vicinity of the portal where the nymph in the Frostweld, upon meeting Voxmachina years before, supposedly lives as you guys stepped into this. Oh shit, Grohg. All right, so. Time to get some

machine. Yep. Hail. Place something else in a living, that everybody loves. No, it works. It works. Locker room with that.

I'm not sure where that? Game for us. So to bring us back in, as you step out into the temperate air, you're struck by the vibrant purples, blues, and pinks of sunset that envelop the skies and clouds above the tree line. The smell of fresh morning dew and poppy upon the breeze fills your head, and your feet wade through tall, thick grasses that tickle your knees with each step.

vine-covered tree trunks rise all around you, curling as they stretch upward like a bending dream scape, and hundreds of small, bobbing fairy lights glow in the shadowed distance of the forest. Looking about you, you can see what appear to be clusters of mud and small pools of water that are scattered in your vicinity, some 10, 15, even 30 feet apart. Just small pools that dot the landscape, almost like pebbles scattered across a small field. What do you guys want to do? Do you? All right? Uh, where are we? It's beautiful. Okay. I feel like we got drugged.

This is fantastic. Is anyone else seeing the colors and the shapes and that? Yeah. It's everything I could have hoped for. I want to live here. Do you, oh, um... Okay. Well, I have no idea how to get our bearings here, unfortunately.

Well, is there any sign of any bit of civilization or construction? Makes it from Jeff. Oh, Lord. First roll of the day, don't fuck it up. Ah! Yay. Her. Terse.

Terse. 26. Okay. As you guys are taking in the vicinity, Percy, glancing around, you see no signs of civilization. The only thing that catches your eye is a little ways past the immediate tree line that meets your eye. The fairy lights seem to be caressing the outside of some sort of older stone structure. And that's just, that's about as much as you can make out. It looks about four or five feet tall, and it's only barely visible between two of the trunks.

I think I see a thing. I'm heading in that direction. Wait, I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go. I want to go. I take off after Percy. Wow. We could always let them go first and then die. Perhaps it might be wise to move quietly. We are already, we're already going. They're already going.

Brilliant. I mean, you remember what our teacher said at this place. It's pretty, but it's dangerous. It's very dangerous and I'm afraid they don't understand. Guys, look, look, look, they're fireflies. Wait, wait, don't touch. Don't touch. We're going to head towards the stone.

Okay, you make your way across these. Make your way across these extremely thick and moss-covered tree trunks. You push past the two and eventually come upon the structure. And as you get closer, the fairy lights just dim and vanish. As soon as you get within about five or six feet of them. They seem to only appear at a peripheral point. You guys approach the stone structure? Do Bex and I have memories of these from our tutoring in Elftown?

Not particularly. Nothing about it strikes you as, you know, of the general Faye Wild lore. I mean, there are structures that have been built throughout periods of time, some of which have fallen to ruin. Nature and the Faye Wild tends to reclaim things that aren't natural if left to their own devices. But the lights, we never heard anything about those lights.

Willow Hisps. Well, Liam knows that, but I'm asking if Vaxe. I would say have both of you guys go ahead and roll history checks for the both of you, just next in Vax. I was going to say, can I add into that too? History. History! No.

I would have had a bit of, I was a little, I learned Elvin. I was a bit of a nerd. You learned Elvin, but Elvin culture and the Fay Wild are two entirely different things. Oh yeah, I'm aware my head's full of bullshit too, so. Yeah. 20.

20? I'm also where my head is full of bullshit. Okay. The best that you can ascertain, the first worry initially, and you haven't encountered something like this before, were willow wisps, were entities that were the lost souls of individuals that died under tragic circumstances in swamps and bogs

and heavily wooded areas. However, those, entities are usually larger and are drawn towards sources of life. The fact that these are much smaller and tend to fade at your arrival means either they're not Willow Wisp's at all or a different kind you have an encounter. This is much information that you can deal with. I wonder if they're fairy folk. Maybe. Yeah. Don't touch. Let's stay 11 paces away.

Okay. I'd like you both to make stealth checks if you could. Okay. Anybody else going up with them or is it just the two of them? Oh, fuck those pieces of bait. Can I climb a tree close by? I would make an athletics check. Athletics.

Can I use my acrobatics to hop up? Oh, like swinging myself. Parkour, parkour. Parkour. Roll athletics with disadvantage, just because I'm giving you a chance. Acrobatics with disadvantage? Just because I'm feeling nice.

24. 24, okay. This is the one. one time you've bartered with the DM this section. No, oh no! I should have saved it! You do manage to leap across, because these trees are thickly wooded and the branch line starts at about the four foot mark anyway, it's fairly easier for you to leap up the top of the trees.

Not an issue, you vanish up under the canopy. You two, what did you roll for stealth? A 20. And a 12. All right, and Liam, what'd you get? I didn't roll anything. I just wanted to call out, you couldn't have used a broom for that. Nope.

All right. So as you guys, you know, we're keeping about 11 feet. 11 feet, okay. At least. You approach this stone structure, which you see now is the corner part of the wall. It looks to be like there was some sort of a small structure here. Best that you can make out, all of it's heavily covered with vine and ivy.

All the places where the stonework has broken, looks to be through natural erosion or claimed by actual roots. And you can see now part of the tree roots have actually risen up and tore down, elements of these walls. And you see broken rubble, like barely poking through the very, very thick underbrush of this forest. Whatever was here was built a long time ago and has been mostly reclaimed by the forest. Inner corner or outer corner? Are we outside the structure? The corner is facing you guys, so you're on the outside of where the structure would have been. It's like a ruin. Are there, or are there walls that continue on?

This is a ruin, but most of it's been just torn down and it's not visible. sections of walls available, the largest piece is currently the corner you're facing. Interesting. Okay, can I do- Go ahead. I'm just gonna sit and quietly sketch for a moment. I'm taking everything down.

Can I do like a check to see if I can recognize who might have built this stone structure? Make a history check. Ten. You have no idea. Okay. The planes you've studied are the planes of the elemental form. The Fay Wild is a little,

ways outside of your realm of any sort of training or story time you've been given growing up. Most of what you've gleaned about it thus far has been based on the conversations you've had in recent weeks. Are there a lot of pastel colors all over the place? I mean it ranges from, at least in this forest, a very, very deep, lush, dark green, like a heavy winter's pine green. The forests are more vine-wrapped mossy, kind of willow-ish trees that kind of hang down. Okay. So not like crazy LSD colors going.

No, however, the evening sky, the clouds are very like purple and orange, like, like around a very bright dusk. And that color-scape does contrast with the green of the forest quite beautifully. Is it dusk? It looks to be getting to dusk, yeah. It may or may not be. What does that be? It means nothing. Time is different in the fair wise.

Is there's not, so there's no carvings on that I can see. see on this out of wall. Not from 10 feet away now. And the vines that are climbing on it, are they flowering at all? Is it? The vines that are there do have what would be like small, small whitish flower buds, little flowers that are kind of just

blooming in a small scale across the vines. Do they look like anything that I, we'd have on our plane? Not particularly. They look like white flowers in assistance, you have to get closer to inspect directly. Can I do that? Sure. Be very careful. Nothing here is exactly what it I don't touch it.

I won't touch it. Touch anything. I'm just gonna, I just, it's so pretty. Don't insuff- Bexalia. What? Yes? Do you want to go higher and get a bird's eye view?

Maybe that's not safe, but... That's why I'm staying in the trees, brother. I meant even higher. I will if it looks safe. All right. Does it look safe? I mean, it's, the canopy is very thick, and only in these small little,

patches of meadow, like the one that you entered, and had all the pools in it, and the one that you're entering now, which has the ruin, have little breaks in the canopy where you can actually see the sky. Otherwise, it's very thick. So actually flying through the canopy, unless you're going very slowly, is gonna be whipping you and probably knocking you off.

Can I see from my height, can I see a better view of the ruins and everything? You can make your way up there a little bit. Make reception check. Keelah, do you go ahead and approach the ruin to get a closer look at the plants? Go out a nature check. Oh, and this is four.

This is forest, right? Mm-hmm. Oh! Snoggy. 30. Whoa. Okay. These white flowers

resemble a form of daisy that exists in Taldore. However, they grow in, they're in flower clusters out of the ground. They've never seen them sprout from a vine. And the shape's a little different. You don't actually know this form of plant from your personal experience,

but you can kind of ascertain a similar nature to it. Nothing is what it seems. I'm calling it a phasy. Are they, a phasy? Yes. Are they like poisonous or anything like that? Don't appear to be toxic, no? Can I touch it?

As you reach out and touch it with your finger, I need you to go ahead and do nothing because it's fine. Oh, you see me. Starts. Here we go. The ASU always means doom. I got 25 on my perception. Okay. As you rock up past the boughs

and you need to emerge from the edge of the canopy over this opening, you do see a very large watered pool on the other side of this ruin. You can see where actually where this ruin used to be, most of it has fallen and sunken into what appears to be a very, very glassy pool of water, a still surface untouched. There's no wind in this area. It's just a perfectly,

perfectly reflective surface to the opening above it. Does this, do I see any life forms around? You don't see any life forms. You do see a hint, a bare, minimum hint of movement, if you were, beneath the water. You can't make out the shake, but you do see something moving beneath the water. Yes. Does this look similar to the pool that was on the other side of the portal? I mean, it's a pool. I wouldn't know.

It looks like water. And you've seen a number that you've come past in this, right? This one's just larger than the others. Okay. I want to pick the little white flower. I wouldn't do that. Okay. I come down and I watch as Keelep makes a stupid move. Okay. You pluck the flower. Ask permission. As you pluck it, the vines begin to writhe and pull away from the stone, actually like releasing the hold on the ruin.

And as it does, you hear what sounds like some movement, some... shifting of water on the other side of the stone wall. Oh, shit. There was something in the water on the other side of the ruins. I just take the flower and I put it back. The vine has attracted and as you set it towards the vine it just tumbles off. Actually the flower you see now as you reach down,

it has turned from a beautiful white and has immediately withered into a black dry nest. Oh, I cannot believe you just killed a living here. Wow, we've been here five minutes. I was going to press it and keep it. I'm not lying, we should be anything we find. I'm not lying, we should probably hide because there's a moose go on the other. Where was one silence, you hear the rushing of leaves of the canopy's beginning to close over.

Like the trees are leaning in the actual branches themselves are starting to close up the gap in space on the other sky. I'm going stealth, taking it at the grass. Stealth check on both you guys. I'm hanging back with the garage. I've been scratching my back on his knee for a while. I don't see what the big deal leaves. 29.

Okay. 34. Okay. Okay. Both you guys, you go back into the branch and kind of feel the branches pushing behind you, and you actually have to kind of get low to not be dragged away with the rest of these extending branches that are closing off the opening in the canopy. Vex, you go ahead and make your way towards one of the tree trunks and kind of just dart out of the way to remain unhidden. Percy, you're watching this in horror as this is transpiring. I'm trying to very gently back her up.

Okay. It's at this point. You guys see a hand creep up over the stone. A secondary hand. Oh, this is good. It's like his version of a doorbell. You know, you pick a plant. You're kidding. You cover him out. Pulling up from here, you now see what appears to be

a humanoid female form, live, hair wet and slicked back. And as the head peeks over, I bow. And I push her down. Okay. The moment there is any movement, she streaks. just flickers and moves back from the wall,

looking already very, very perturbed by this whole circumstance. I need both of you guys to make Constitution saving throws. Okay. Oh, no. Oh, no. 21. Natural one.

Natural one. You're shoved ahead and begin to go into a bow. Percy, you bow, but you can't take your eyes off as the creature kind of pulls herself up over the wall. An extremely beautiful, impossibly beautiful woman, nude. steps up over the edge of the wall, and as you glance forward, everything goes dark. Just blackness.

Is he still conscious? Am I... Do I say to do you say? You go ahead and you bow, and he appears be bowing. He's still standing. He's fine. Hello? As soon as you say that, the creature darts backward and you take a few steps and then leap

and dives into the pool and vanishes beneath the water's surface. Although you see that, Keeleith. Prissy, you do not. I don't see anything. You just hear footsteps. You just hear footsteps. Oh dear. What happened?

Well, we're going to have to find her. Did she say anything? No. She was very pretty. Yes, she was also naked. Are you okay? I think she blinded me. What?

No, she blinded me. I'm... And you look as Percy eyes wide open, glancing about the pupils moving about, he... Yes, I'm blinded. I'm blind. Okay. Really?

Really? And I... We should test it out. Yeah. How many fingers are we holding up? One. Oh! He's a liar. You can see five. He's a shit, no trust. Grog. What?

Did you recognize that woman? Were you paying attention? Oh. I was working on this spot on my back. You didn't see the naked woman come up over that wall. Where? What do you think of the chances of me? having a panic attack.

Hold on, hold down, hold down. Did you hear that? I don't know. If there was a naked woman, I would have seen it. Oh yeah. You're all right. Can I? Can I...

I'm gonna crawl up in a little ball for a minute and rock. Okay. Percy, Percy, Percy, Percy, percy. I come down out of the tree. We can fix this. Can you just be quiet in two seconds? Why did you make it a wear off and look at a minute? Lois is very...

What? Grog. There was a naked woman in a pool. Go on. that reminded me of maybe the pool on the other side. We were jumping over from close to that portal, right? Could it be the nymph that you stole the heart of? She was very pretty.

Oh, no, baby. Would it be safe for you to see her again and maybe ask for her to cure our friend here, or would you, is she dangerous to be around? She didn't blind me. What did she do to you? That's none of you. business. Well, I worry if we go try to talk to her if it's not her, then she could blind all of us.

I don't know. My chick didn't blind me, so if she did, I think we need to come. I'm going to take out my Dragon Slayer Longsword. Okay. Stand up and start using it as a cane. Find my way to grog and poke him with it. Okay. Make a perception check. Better. That's 18. Okay, as they're having this conversation, you just to tap, find your way over, and sure enough, no person has the leg density that Grog does, and you're pretty sure you have your mark. Gonna give it a good little whack. Oh, I'm sorry, it's so hard to see.

I'm sorry, I need to be more sensitive. Look out, it's a parrot! And I kicked the sword. A parrot? Yeah, the rabbit parrot's out here in the Faye Wild. You kicked the sword. You kept the sword. The sword, just... Oh, you know what?

Just go pick it up. Oh, let me get it for you. I'll hold on to it since you're obviously useless now. I'll go pick up the Dragon Slayer log sword. Okay. I walk over to Percival. I'm worried you're gonna walk your glasses into a tree or something. Do you want one of us to hold those for the time being?

I'll take them off and put put them in my pocket. If you have something to put them inside of besides just the pocket, I don't want you falling on them. No, it'll be, there's a, I've got a thing, it'll be all right. First of all right. Would you like something to hold on to as you walk? Actually, if you don't mind, Trinket? Can I borrow a bear? Yes. Yes, of course. A bear would be lovely. I pop trinket out. Do you have to spell magic. Do you actually have to spell magic today. Hi, buddy. Let's hold off. But it might wear off and on that question. Jow was just shaking. We're in a weird place and weird things can happen.

Trinket, we're in a very weird place, a weird place, things can happen. And I whisper to Trinket, don't crush the flowers. I'm willing to try and make this work for a moment. Let's find this. Trinket, can you help Percival walk? He's kind of blind. I, Matt. Yes.

Pike is with us, right? No. No. No, okay. She's back in white stone. She's back in white stone. All right, I roll out once in a while on Skype. I guess I missed that.

That's okay. All right, so. This is so weird. You feel the somewhat damp, cold nose of a bear nudge under your hand, and then, kind of a little shoulder lunges into you. Oh, thank you. Now don't walk into any trees, Trinkett, dear.

Do you like, I'm gonna try and hop on top. Oh. So I'm gonna make a little bit. leap to get on top of the bear. Okay. It takes you a little while, but you get awkward on to the bear. Eventually, you have to kind of write in, because he's facing the wrong direction a little. All right, so wait, can we just be clear, you picked a flower,

older trees got pissed off, you went blind, some naked chick jumped a wall, and that's the story of what's happened so forth. Yeah, it's very young. We are killing it right now. Don't pick some flower. Five minutes. Don't touch it. Don't touch it.

I feel like maybe we need a change in leadership, I'm just saying. Very large consequences. Antsequences for picking flowers. Don't pick flowers. Don't touch anything. Which way did she go? She jumped over the wall here and she's in the... Should we follow?

Yeah, Vax, can you get a pair of eyes on her without going blind? I don't feel confident about that. I can try. Which direction was this pool? It's right past the ruins. Right there, darling. What drunk Percy go on? Grog, do you want to give it a go?

Black. go look for her? Just go see if it's her. All right, fuck it. Peek around, peek, okay. No, and I do like a full vault over the wall. You land, feet go into the muddy outskirts of the pond, about up your ankles, but you can see there's,

the water is now kind of rippled and disturbed from- I stick my fingers in the mud. Does it smell weird? It smells like probably the freshest poolside mud you've ever come across. Oh, I put across my chest. Gross. And now, do I see any footprints from where a naked chick went?

No, none. What? She went in the wall. She left no trities. Are you sure in the water? She was in the water before. Does anyone want to come with me to the water? Are you in the water?

I'll go with you. I'll go with you. You're not going anywhere. Drink it. I'll go get your eyes back. Okay. All right. I cautiously make my way down to the...

How far is the water? Can I see it from where I am now? Yeah, it's about maybe 10 feet from you. All right, I'm stealthily. I'm really make my way 10 feet towards a water. Roll stealth check. You put it in the descriptor, man. I did.

That's good. 17. Okay. You make your way markedly quiet as you can. I'm just gonna sit on the wall and kind of watch for a second. Okay. You come up to the edge of the water and you can see some of the ripples are starting to, you know, kind of lap across the mud. The mud and silt just continues downward into a perfectly clear pool, though the light source has been cut off from the sky now. the canopy is closed. And when a little bit of light happens to find its way through the forest ceiling, other than that, it's pretty dark.

However, you do have dark vision, and a few of you do have dark vision, so it's not a huge hindrance within a certain distance. You do see what appears to be clouds of silt on the bottom of the water that have slowly found their way close to resting. I'm going to call out, hello. No comment. No immediate response, no. Can I reach in a bag of holding and grab a basilisk egg? And can I try and launch it as far as I can into the pool? Yeah. Go make a strength check. I'm going to scrabble up next to Keyleth to watch this.

Okay. Sitting on the side of the wall. 23. 23. You lob the egg with perfect accuracy directly into the center of the pool. It hits and just kind of floats on the surface, semi-boiant, just a little bit of the shell revealed on the top. A few moments pass before a few fingers curl up, kind of grab it and pull it down below.

Oh, I saw a hand. Did you recognize the hand? What was it? Do it again, do it again. No, I'm not like Rachel, I was like Tried someone subtracting this by the head. Grog, Grog, do you know how to float? Do you know how to float on top of water?

Yeah. You should do that. Yeah, because then she'll pull him under and drown him. there. Right, don't we want to talk to her? What if there's more than one her? It went really well for you the last time. I just figured it went well for you the last time, so you know. Do whatever you did the last time. You're the only one who's done this before.

Yeah, but there were like these invisible steps, right? I feel like we wanted some kind of steps, and then there was a portal. Yeah, and she came out first. It wasn't like, I went to her apartment and I was like, hey, want to hook up? Hey, does this look like the pool you came into on the other side? Does this look like the pool I came into another side? Make an intelligence check. Natural 20. 11. I mean, you were distracted for the brief time you spent over here.

But it does appear to be similar. Similar? Is this the pool you consummated with? Oh. Could she have a name? So you did consummate with her. Is that what you were saying? No, her name was nymph.

Nymph. No, I don't know. Why'd you call out her name? Maybe just call out for her. Oh, nymph! We're the art now. Sure. Make a persuasion.

Nymph and I or as in. It's not good. It's fire, it's fire. Seven. You watch as suddenly there's a burst of bubbles under the surface of water. I think she just farted. Scanlan. What's up?

Whisper to Grog what to say to draw a lady out. You're very charismatic. Oh, yeah. And just repeat what do you hear Scanlan say. Okay. Well, you gotta come closer, though. I'll come closer. Use your earring. And maybe keep, oh yeah, we've got earrings.

Serenotech. Serenotech. Serenote. Serenote. Sure. Serenote. All right. Oh, nymph, hear my call.

Oh, nymph, hear my ball. Nope, call. Gold. Once we spent an afternoon together. Once we spent an afternoon together. The sun never shone brighter. The sun never shone brighter. The clouds were never quite as fluffy.

The clouds were never quite as fluffy. Oh, it would make me a man again to see you once more. That was too much. Oh. It would make me a man again. To see you as once more. I have a small day. Another burst of bubbles comes up from the surface

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and shud it over her shoulder. She steps up and this time her feet touch the surface and she walks on it like it's solid. As she begins to step carefully towards you. I apologize for being, well, she kind of points over towards him. I would recommend in the future perhaps more respectful means of arrival.

I recall your name was Grog, is that correct? That's right, my lady. Forgive me, your beauty has wiped my mind. Your name was Nala. Nala. Oh. Pretty name. That's pretty good.

Yeah, it's pretty good. I shan't, shan't forget again. Simp is good. Wonders. Yeah. I watch over this glade. It is bound to me as I am to it. I would hope that in the future you be more gentle,

with that that resides here. Sorry, I'm just, I'm a huge fan, is all. Hi. I'm Keelith, by the way, of the Ayrashari. As you're talking in this moment, there's a sudden sparking sound, like a heavy, heavy log has fallen in a forest with a crack and a thume. There's a flash of light, and she instinctively turns and then just dives beneath the water once more. once more. It wasn't me. It wasn't me.

As you guys glance over, there's a somewhat shimmering form of kind of light that congeals into a small gnomish female. It's flickering in and out. As Pike, after coming back from your goodbyes and walking to the temple of Pellor now constructed to take at least a moment to begin building a bastion for a ceremony worship here as well, you miss your friends.

so hard in that moment, that for a brief moment, the divine energies give you one last brief moment to walk beside them across the plane. Is she really? It's been like five fucking minutes. Wait, but don't we have a gate stone? Yeah, but. I'm sorry. I just, I just, I didn't want to stay.

Sara was taking care of stuff. Is it because I owe you two gold? Yes. Okay, here it is. Hey, bye. Oh. Buddy. I'm very! Hey, how are you? What the fuck did you just do? How are you here?

I just missed a naked chick. There's a naked chick. Oh. She blinded Percival. Hello. Oh, wow. Well, maybe we can take it. Where is she? Yeah, she went back under water. Well, do me in favor. Look, maybe everybody take a knee and be real chill while I throw down their swag, all right? Sorry, did I come in at a bad time? Well, you kind of pock-ploc, Grohl. No, no, no. No, no. I'm sorry, Grohl. I was on Fleck,

and now I'm on flock. Oh no, well, let's fix it. I just, I had to come, I had to come. No, yes. Of course. I'm just so glad you're going to be. You know, it's crazy. I know it's so crazy.

It's so crazy. I know we just say bye, but had to come. All right, let's do this. All right. We all get done. All right. Nala is a friend, not a foe. She's with me and a great ally of ours.

With that Nala steps back, through the water, taking invisible steps up to the top of the surface, where you're now up to your, pretty much up to your waist in the pool at this time. She's now standing directly on the surface about 10 feet from you. She looks out and looks towards you as,

I remember you as well. Hi, I remember you. I didn't mean to startle you. I didn't know that everyone was in the middle of something. She fucked her too. I just, no. She met all of you guys. I just said.

Yeah, no, she did. Yes, she did. All right. Yeah, that's right, for hot seconds. But then she took Grog. Of course you remember that thing that happened when we were drunk to what happened. You're going.

She kind of. I do apologize again for startling you. It's all right. Not many things happen in this day these days, so when they happen rapidly, tends to drop my heart a bit. Speaking of which, do you still carry my heart with you, girl?

As you know. My lady, of course I do. Do you answer head? I don't sense it on your person. Oh, oh. Um, right. Like, in actual, no, I don't. We needed it for something.

Yeah, so like when last I saw you, I had this horrible bunk in my chest. It was terrible. And in combination with your heart, I was able to remove it, prolong my life, which means I'm here. Not you're safe. I shall begin the process of creating a new one then.

I did serve do well. It did, thank you. Many, many thanks. And you have our apologies again for beheading one of your flowers and for making all the loud, snappy noises. This is not the way we wanted to start, believe me. She kind of puts her hand up in this. I drew it craft a, tell Dory Daisy and just kind of give it back to her.

I didn't need to hurt. She nods and laughs. She kind of brings her arm up and as she does, a singular vine seems to grow up out of the muck and curl up and take the daisy from your finger and just drag it off into the forest. Sorry. If I might ask, old bleachy hair over here,

take a look at your beauty. and all of a sudden went, I can't see anything. Well, that's a hard lesson learned. Is, can you not give it back? Not peace blind forever. With your striking beauty? It doesn't work that way, I'm sorry.

How does it work? What does it happen? Most part, those that fall under my protective gaze, they have earned it. I don't consider past that. And my... by innate talents do not reach beyond that striking, so I'm sorry.

Get it out. Totally cool. We're gonna put some braille on your gun. As far as I know. I bet Pike has a few tricks up his suite. I think I could give it a go with some things. Do you have regeneration on you today? Yeah, that's good. That's good.

I think it's probably mystical, so as long as, yes, all right. I could attempt to dispel magic. Maybe you're just this way now, and you'll have to, you know, your other senses will get better. You know, you can rock it for a while. No. That's not a thing. You said it's been very calm around here.

Yes. No unexpected visitors or commotions lately. Not around my glade, no. I'd know. May I introduce to you, Vexalia. Hello. Hi. Yes. Good to see you again.

That's right. I forget. She is seeking something. Something in this place. Yes, actually. We all are. Have you heard tale of a sick tree? Something very cancerous on the land. There are trees that fall under various states of corruption,

time and time again, in the fay wild. Light and darkness stands eternal here. This one holds a bow at its heart. It's located in a bog. In a bog. Is she? Something about glass. A hunk bog or something like that?

Can't be my writing? Near the river of the gilded run. That one. The shade mark bog. That's the one. That is roughly two days duskward from here. Two days duskward? Duskward.

That's West. That's West. What past is West? I just started a page on the Fay Wilde and now it's already Miss Theris. No, I'm sorry. I'm very simple. Duskwood actually West.

Duskwood bun. Duskwood is towards the duskwild. She points, and she puts her finger up. You can see the trees relax now and kind of open up the sky above you. And you can see the direction where most of the setting sunlight is being cast into the sky, and she motions in that direction. Are you controlling the way the trees move? This is my glade. We are one.

Yes, it's just very impressive. Man, can you like teach people how to do that? Because that's awesome. We'll be moving on before that. I just, you know, I'll talk to you later about it. Have you heard anything of this bow or this tree? I have not. I stay here.

This is my home, and I am bound to it to not wander too far. What I know of the Shadmirk, I only know through individuals who passed through and kept me up to speed with things that may or may not be transpiring. in this landscape, but those meetings are tens of years, if not more, between. I'm sorry. Have there been any significant changes of late cities here that didn't exist but a while ago? Not to my knowledge, no. My understanding of realms beyond this.

This wood and beyond this glade are fairly limited beyond what I've been given by passers-by, and it's been, well, not since you, Grog, stepped you with me. I've not had another cross my path. Sounds lonely. It's my life. The trees keep me company. The roots they speak. The earth itself is sustenance and the voice, the timeless voice of this land. Well, there are many stories here. She's so sweet. I really like her. As we make our way towards this area, is there only thing that you would warn us of? Everything.

Oh, everything. Like don't pick the flowers. Like, don't pick the flowers. I've got that much. Specifically we should avoid specific plants, colors. Hands in the pocket policy going forward. Yes. Gage with care that which you temper.

Many things lie and live in these lands. that could be evade in many your own destruction. Words spoken by many who live and call the Faye Wilde their home are in themselves riddles. Deceit is a common form of time passage. And those that wander from beyond, well, some would consider you more of a toy or a plaything than a visitor or passerby. Before we leave, is there anything we might bring you on our way back through here? Should we be successful?

Bring me some books. Books? Books? I like some books. My kind of books like pictures? Pictures are always nice, but things to tell me of things beyond my sphere. Perhaps the world you come from beyond the Frostfield, I know very little as well. I have a book on me.

Would you like it? Take whatever you wish to say goodbye with. Well, I mean I basically haven't memorized at this point. I've read it so many times. She takes it. My thumb's the real. That'll be 30 gold. 35.

They're back. Make your money back. 50 gold. Yeah. Mark up some bits. Flip it. Clos is it. Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you. Is there any, before we set out, you've told us what to be wary of. Everything. Is there anyone out there we can trust if we come across them? It depends on what you seek and what your reasons are. I mean, trust goes always. The difficulty is finding who is aligned with your ideals, your intentions and your goals, and who isn't. I trust. Practically no one. Sorry.

I'm sorry, were you talking to me? Just pointing at you. Just nod. Just nod. I don't know. What were those little colored lights that disappear as we get close? Oh, facebacks. They are small entities that care to the underbrush of the forests here. They're not dangerous.

Do they lead you anywhere? I'm sure they lead you many places, though none of them maybe we were trying to go. I wouldn't trust them to guide you. They themselves are very deceptive. deceptive and trickery loving entities. Let they help me keep the glade in the forest. I was so low, sorry. I was just, you know, just wondering if you have any sort of,

I mean, you know, you're very well versed with this area, any form of protection that you could offer us or recommend to us as we move forward in this confusing land. Any last bit of advice? Make a persuasion roll. And E6. Kind of things for a moment, holding the tome under her arm. Well, I have minor magical capabilities.

Perhaps I could harden the physicality of one of you and way to aid. It won't last long, but it's something. Yeah. Any assistance is more than greatly appreciated. Maybe Grog? No, I definitely don't need it. Who's all tender? You mean tender?

Vax. Percy at this point. Oh, well, that's true. Maybe as a, oops, yeah. How many of us can you emboldened? I'm a bit useless at the moment. No, don't set yourself short. No, who gets you cared for?

Oh, you're great, you're great. I know I know what you're doing right now. You can feel. She steps forward and kind of, as you're having this conversation, she puts her fingers towards the front of your forehead and touches your skin. You feel a surge of warmth through your body, though blackness still takes your vision.

The rest of you watch as his skin suddenly turns to a dark brown and crackles. Oh. For a brief moment, you fear, but notice it's like his physical form. All parts of the pinky flesh of the human Percy become hard like tree bark. Oh.

That's attractive. You go wood. How's it feel? How's it feel? I sniffed Percy. It's like a fine cedar. It's nice, it suits you. It's very masculine. It's a musk.

Thank you. I'm still angry with you, but thank you. God, carve your name in him. Yes. Oh my God. Holy shit. Percy just considered for one minute. I just put the pistol slowly in the direction of his works. I'm not a very much.

I do appreciate your gift, and I do apologize for my friend and for startling you earlier. It is my deepest regret that I cannot take in the majesty of your realm for the moment. Of your realm. I don't know. Well, keep your wits about you. She didn't blind me. That's the finest defense you have against this uncertain landscape.

It was a true joy seeing you again. We'll try to bring ourselves by this way on our way out as we can. I appreciate that. If it's good to see your faces as brief as is. Well, wish this luck. Good luck. Safe travels. Bye, Anna. As we walk away, I give Percy a wet willie. I bow to her before I leave.

Does she go for the wet willy? Yeah, yeah, we give that too. No, I give you a wet willy. Are you trying to give me a wet willy? I say again, I bow before we leave. Not a range attack. Missile smear? So you bow.

Wet willy is not a range attack. She turns around against to walk back down the the visible steps you see her taking, she drifts deeper into the water and actually kind of, just before she disappears beneath the server, she looks over her shoulder and smiles at you grog, and then disappears beneath the water below.

Be honest, you totally. What? Did you? Oh, what? Did you? What's wrong with your mouth? Did you get it on with her? Did you like experience?

Population, God, population. She means to do the thing. No. There's no population in that. I think it's just her in that. Mm. Missal stuff. She liked the beard, though.

I noticed. Oh, that's right. I will say. The gil was not after Lily there. As you guys are having this conversation, there's a brief sound as Percy, even Munk's blinded state, catches Keel's finger in midair. I still don't say that's a range attack.

I still don't say it's a range attack. Oh. Gross. Don't say that out loud. That's so sick. I'll make my way towards the dusk direction. All right. To the ward the shade, Merck.

Wait, hold on. I was standing next to Keelith, so I stick my pinky into my mouth and I shove it into Percy's ear. Ha ha ha ha! Wet Willie is happening. Flanked by Wet Willey's, Percy, one is halted, but in the distracted moment,

and the stealthy rogue being what he is, you feel the slimy insertion of a single half-elven digit into your ear canal. I say, Keyleth, that is really immature, really. What is the matter with you when I walk off? All right, we don't, you want to see? You know what? I'm still angry at you.

We should fix you. Yes, yes, Pike can fix it. But let's just all remember that the episode title's going to be the slimy insertion. Consider that payback. Yeah. I apologize for that. Is there any like rocks or debris or like little pebbles around on the ground? Yeah, I mean there's plenty of like stone debris, the larger stone.

I'll take a small pebble. You really should do what you can to help Percy. can to help Percy. All right. And I toss the pebble at his face. Okay. This is there. Yeah.

With disadvantage. Make a perception check. Okay. See, that is a range attack. 26. He catches the pebble out of the air. I mean, you have it. Pretty well.

You're very, do great. My kung fu is far stronger than yours. All right, Pike, do your thing. We can fix you. I don't know if he needs it. Well, I know if you need it. I have dreamed about it. I'm coming here since I was a little child.

I'm going to see this. Okay, okay. Wait, wait, let's all just think about this for a moment. Don't do anything hasty. Everybody, let's back up slowly. Okay, back. It gets really quiet suddenly, Percy. I'm on a bear.

Yes. Trinquet kind of stops and... It's okay, Trinket. Mike, if you do this thing that you're going to do, will it take away his bark skin too? I don't know. That's why I'm a little bit of it. Well, you know, that's just how it goes.

You know, and to be fair, bark skins, it's all right. It's all right. Maybe it's temporary. Just try. Just try. Or the blindness, I don't know. I'm willing, you know, that you're all wearing their earrings. I'm willing to give it.

It's dangerous as it is, but. I mean, it's clearly hilarious, but Percival is our sharpshooter. I don't know if we want to. A blind sharpshooter is one of our sharp shooters. Thank you very much. Oh, God. Well, we want one when we could.

Have two. Let's try it then. Let's do it. A blind sharpshooter might not be the best in the Faye Wild. I would just throw it out there. Shame if your broom breaks. All right, lay hands. Okay, well. It's really, well. Hey, I want to heal you, all right? I know. I know. Do you want to be healed or not person? I didn't give you a wet Willy. She's first you say you're mad at me and then you ensnare my melee wet willie. People, people, we're tearing ourselves apart in the Fayewild. I'm just reminding the dear what it signed her bread is buttered on.

Let Pike get rid of this. The war is over and both sides lost. Kingdoms were reduced to cinders, an army scattered like bones in the dust. Now the survivors claw to what's left of a broken world, praying the darkness chooses someone else tonight. But in the shadow dark, the darkness always wins. This is old school adventuring at its most cruel. Your torch ticks down in real time. and when that flame dies, something else rises to finish the job.

This is a brutal rules-light nightmare with a story that emerges organically based on the decisions that the characters make. This is what it felt like to play RPGs in the 80s, and man, it is so good to be back. Join the Glass Cannon podcast as we plunge into the Shadow Dark every Thursday night at 8 p.m. Eastern on YouTube.com slash the Glass Cannon with the podcast version dropping the next day. See what everybody's talking about and join us in the dark. Look, there are a lot of celebrity interview podcasts out there, but there's only one Happy, Sad, Confused. I'm Josh Horowitz, and yeah, I'm the host of the show, so I'm a little biased, but truly Happy, Sad, Confused is the place for nerdy and intimate conversations with all your

favorite actors and filmmakers. From Andrew Garfield and Scarlett Johansson to Christopher Nolan, casting what ifs, backstage stories, and much more. Listen to Happy Sad Confused on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you. you get your podcasts. Blind spots so we can all be together again. I mean, it's masterful. How long is he been working on that?

Well, critical role. Right. Come here, give it a go. All right, wait, wait, Percy. What? What? Say you're not mad at me anymore. Say, say, hey, I know I've done things in the past

to piss you all. and you know, maybe... Trinqueh, Keeleif. Keeleif. It's untrity. You're gonna lurches forward and search. Am I a reckless human? Yes.

So when I say you shouldn't probably touch anything, that's probably a really good reason, right? Hmm. Yeah, you know, it's just, are you gonna hold this one against me because I picked a flower? Trinket's of like how you held the clasp against me. Trinket, come against me. Begin dragging him away from you towards stress.

Do you, can I go hold against me like the clasp? Huh? Huh? Huh? Do you need inspiration, Pike? No, I think it's okay. So I'll go up to him. I'll have my revenge, but I love you.

It's okay. I get my way up Trinket and has greater restoration. Okay. So as you clutch your holy symbol, your kind of flickering divine form drifts over towards the side of Trinket, you reach up and touch his leg,

and the warmth of the divine energy surges through his leg. through his leg. You can see it almost like a sparkle up his chest, little light rays kind of peering out from beneath the clothing. It comes up his gullet, up the side of his face, and his eyes flash white for a second, with beams of gentle sunlight, just shooting out for a second.

The darkness becomes blurry, and your vision over the next 15 or so seconds returns to normal. Oh. You see? Yes, much better. Hi. Nice. So good to see you.

All right. Is he still, does he still a bark skin? Yes. Yay! Look at that. I come up from behind and give them another wet-wheeling. Ah! See, see, I got you even when you were, had your eyes.

I'll make you a deal. Yeah. I'll make you a deal. All right, what, what? Oh, yes. What, what? Can we stop moving forward? Yeah, we just leave them. Yeah, we leave them.

All right, all right. Yeah. We'll keep moving. Okay. You guys catch up to the rest of the party, who's now moved on ahead. Uh-huh, uh-huh. Making your way through this thick forest. I would like you all to make a perception check. Perception.

Perception check. Perception? Yep. Nice. That went away. 19. Natural night. 27.

11. 11. 24. 25. Oh, 10. 14. What did you get? Liam?

24. 24. Okay. 25s are higher, which I think is Kila. 25. Yeah. Kielof and Vex. You guys. push through the forest for about another two hours or so.

While we do that, I take Percy's bark skin and make it, I regal it out. So I give them some little moss epaulets. Not Sam regals, but yeah. I give them moss epaulettes, grow some flowers on it, give them a little white stone flower crown. Okay. Fancy tree. I'm making them a fancy tree. Fancy tree.

Fancy group. Now we're even. Good. All right. You look my house. Two hours of travel towards the direction of the dust, keeping tabs on that best you can, you being the tracker. you are, you notice that the night hasn't come.

The light in the sky itself has not changed. The dusk hasn't waxed or waned. There's been no change in the sky light or color whatsoever. The dusk seems to, at least the last couple hours, been perpetual and unmoving. Maybe we're in the dusk glance. I feel like I remember hearing that the time here is very strange.

It stays at a constant constant. Correct? Well, not necessarily. Kind of. I think it's malleable. Maybe you just move slower here, I don't know. Or we are moving towards dusk, correct? We're moving towards the sighting sun.

You're moving towards that. That was the one direction you were given by the Nymph. It could be that we are either stuck in a loop or that we are simply in an area of the fair wild that is eternal dusk. Well, she said it like we're moving forward. She said it was two days travel. To dusk's travel.

Duskward. So we have to pass a dusk at least. That could be years. It could. Hmm. Wow. Do you think it's safe if I fly up and look at the sky? No, but you might as well.

Nothing safe. Do I see any birds or anything like that in the sky? Any wildlife? Any critters? Any critters? Critters. Critters everywhere. Um, 27. Sorry, 21.

No, see. Yes. 21. Yeah, okay. You glance up the next opening you have in the next opening you have the canopy and you see occasionally flocked birds go flying by. There is definitely a vibrant wildlife. And you've seen throughout the forest here, skittering squirrels and other creatures that live here, though themselves being kind of skittish and running off as soon as your footfalls begin to hit that portion of the forest. There is a very vibrant

kind of critter lifestyle here within this part of the Fay Wild. Should I, should I, I'm going to try flying up? Ding. All right, I'm going to try to do it. You're lying up above the canopy. Okay. You come above the canopy, having to maneuver around some of the larger branches, and these trees are tall.

You probably get yourself about 100 feet up before you finally break the canopy. And there's a coast over the top. You can see now before you, this forest is vast. A majority of it behind you, and you can actually see what appears to be the edge of the forest line, maybe about 10 miles up. All right.

And just past that, you can see it would be rolling grass hills before a mountain line. You can see in the distance, very, very far distance, make perception check. I'm assuming I'm not in the forest anymore, right? This would be looking beyond the forest, so yeah, I would not have advantage. 17.

17. You see a faint glimmer of some kind, something that stands out as like a reflection or beast of light amongst the grass fields beyond the forest. You're unable to really tell the distance, but it does stand out as it just kind of like occasionally flickers. Lickering. Do I see any sort of sign of a city? Not from this perspective, no. Mostly it just like looks natural from this view. Also the clouds in the sky are slowly moving, like little more clouds, but and you can see in the distance

what appears to be a sun that is just passed beyond the mountain. but there is no change in the light. The sky looks the same. The same it was since the moment you arrived. Well, at least we know we've made some headway. I go back down. We heard. There's a tree line at least.

I think we should reach it soon. And if we don't, then we know that there's a problem. Exactly. And just remember, in theory, from what little I know, the prettier it is, the more dangerous it probably is, and the older it is, the more dangerous it probably is. But things get prettier as they get older here,

that's not fair. Maybe you... Just the man. Damn it. All right, well let's keep going then. Okay. You guys push on for another three or so hours. We're not out of the tree line yet.

At the pace you guys are walking, you... you just begin to push outside of the trees. It was hard gauging the distance from that period of time. That was kind of the rough estimate based on the perception rule. You begin to just watch the tree line thin a bit. There's still many trees around you, but the density is beginning to scatter, and you're going to see more and more light let through

from the tree tops, and the trees themselves are not as tall as they were towards the central bulk of the forest. Vex, you do catch to your left side something which sounds like a first little hiss, but instead it comes to your ear as a chuckle. Do you hear something? There's somebody there. Make a perception check.

Oh, natural 20. Natural 20. You glance out of the corner of your eye and you see about four trees behind you some outline of a shaded figure that darts behind a tree. What? Say what. See what? Okay, cool, cool, cool.

Did it look like childlike or adult-like? In between. Okay. We got a problem here? Just be ready. What's wrong? Which direction? Behind us.

Okay. I saw you. Let's get back to back, shall we? I'm gonna just sit backwards on the bear while we forward. Okay. I'm gonna go back to back to the twins. Did you want to say hello? Response.

All right, I guess we'll just have fun over here without you. Are you sure you really saw something? Laugh like I just told a really funny joke. Oh, you kill me. Who would want to miss this? I know, it was really funny. It didn't know a nun could curse like that. I didn't know you could tell funny, Judge.

Anything? Uh-huh. You guys continue making your way towards the edge of the forest. And shortly after the tree line does come to an end. There are small clusters of trees, but beyond that, you're now opening what looks like it. This nearly endless grassland, the grasses themselves swaying with a breeze that's just starting to catch up.

You can see the waves they curl over these low hills and this beautiful, deep, verdant, green emerald color that just kind of shifts and cascades over and over and over, and over. As you begin to step into the grass, it's high. It's like chest high. To the half-helves, about a little blow waist high to you, and the gnomes are swimming through grass at this point. Hey buddy. This is fun, though. You want to keep staying down there doing the breaststroke?

Oh, no. I'm done. It occurs to me, I don't actually have to ride the bear anymore. No, you don't. Do you guys want to ride trinket and see? No, thanks. I'll ride Grog. Yeah. All right Trinket. Sweet. Okay, so you have up on Trinkid. Blossed a lot of down.

Trinkin. Do you get the Voxkin? Yeah, nice. He looks good too, right? I'm group. Yes, it's so fancy. She's done me up. Yeah.

I give Trinket a scratch where he, it makes him like, go weird and start like, like the head and it goes back like, does despot. It just up and gives you a lick, but it kind of like pseudo-passes through your form, and it looks really confused and kind of towards the bare head at the side. That's right. Sorry, buddy. Oh, as we're walking, do, okay, well, first question, do I see any form of path through this grass, or does it just look like? It's just open field, directionless and before you.

There is still the dusk ahead. ahead of you, and that's the best directional point you have right now. But there is no worn path, there is no road or street, there are no signs of civilization. It looks like just an endless field. It is beautiful. I've played the original Legend of Zelda. I know if we go up, left, down left.

We should get out of this field again. Shoot the bush. The flicker of light I saw in the distance, is that are we going to intersect it the direction that we're going? Uh, you will get it. near it. Okay. So I'll keep an eye in that direction as we move forward. Okay. But I wanted to talk to you, Kedith. Yeah. So I've been trying to find out a way to to Trinket like I know you can, right? Oh, yeah. And I was wondering if maybe you could

teach me how to do that. Teach you, do you think that's possible? I don't know, but I'd like to try. Okay. Yeah, that'd be fun. Right. Okay. Um, can I do something like that? I have a spell slot available to first speak to animals that I never claimed that I want to learn. You want to take it? Okay. As you guys begin to walk through the field, you begin to reveal some of the druidic secrets

of animal communication to Vex, and over the course of the next hour of travel, over with larger heads. See, the thing is you kind of have to get the accents right for each critter, or else they could get a little offended. Oh, right. You know, so. You know, so, you know.

Totally. So, you know. I keep going. She bestows upon you the elements of it. It's less about vocality, and it's being able to connect on an empathic and emotional level where creatures can speak to you less out of words and more out of the idea of emotions and thoughts, which are human minds,

or mostly in some cases, half human minds, except as words. But there is an actual speech that they're talking, like, hello, my dear. So one of the things that I like to do is just to kind of like, the animal, you know, and that it can kind of get you, like, in the mindset of where they're coming from. I would definitely keep that in mind.

You know, so let's just, you know, let's practice being Trinket together, you know, so let's... I let her just do that, and I'm just gonna keep walking. Yeah, she does it for a while. Yeah. I've got to grog. I'm learning so much. See, see, see, so you kind of got it like, you know.

I think we're all learning. This is so great. And I woke up to Trinket. I wish that Nala had passed blindness on me. Can I walk up to Trinket and say, Hey, buddy, can you understand me? I'm sketching every foot. Do you cast the spell?

Yeah. And Trinket kind of turns to you. Do you understand me? Yes. I hug him so hard. Oh my gosh, oh my gosh. You kind of grab it. Trinket.

Trinket doesn't seem to realize any sort of difference. Trinket. But you understand me all the time? Yes. Oh, Dad. But now I understand you, and it's wonderful. Okay. Okay, quick question.

Do you mind being in my necklace, or does it bother you? What's it like? Is it terrible? Because I don't want to do it if you hate it. It's a little lonely, but... Oh, no. That's lonely. I haven't been in there very long. No, you haven't.

Okay, well, that's good. Well, I basically just wanted to say that I love you so much. I just give her a thumbs up. I love you too, but I love you too, but I don't. I start crying. Big lick outside your face and kind of nudges his head against you. Oh, this is the best man ever coming from you. Oh, Trenka.

Thanks, Keeney. The accent's really good. You're doing a good job. It's very good. As a trinket nudges you, and she says, It's okay. I can stay in there all you need.

Thanks, buddy. I can watch you through there. You can? I can't. You can? Wait, you can? Yes. Cool.

It's kind of like when you know, like your dog comes in the room when you're peeing. It's a little awkward at first when you hear about it, but it's fine. It's okay. I'm all right. Frog, you've actually been in there, so you kind of have an idea of what he's talking about.

If you understood what he was saying, which you don't, because you don't have a good. Boom! What? I'm just imagining like the genie bottle. And I just thought, like, for a while. As long as my spell lasts, I just want to keep talking to drink it and like catch up on old times and hear about everything. You guys do, and he talks about how he kind of hated at the time,

but in hindsight enjoyed the memory of the pie contest and white stone. Right, that was so good, right? What about getting his hair done with flowers and braids? Do you remember the bows? He tells you that was fine, but you can tell through the subtle bear on their tones that he wasn't too happy about it. Yeah. But everything has this tone of basically whatever you need

and anything for you. There is an undying loyalty and love from Trinket that you've always felt, but now to hear in language form is very moving. You're having a fresh moment. I'm watching quietly the whole time with a smile at this bear that I've known as a cub grunting with my sister grunting.

back and it's very touching. It's very touching, and I'm very touching. I love it so much. I love to pay wild. I think the whole thing's fucking weird. Keylet wipes away a little tear. Same. I'm sitting on Trinket, just wiping away tears. We make a step here.

We want to go. Yeah, no, no, we're walking. We're walking forward. We're still walking. We've been walking to the cold down. You guys keep walking. And you keep walking. And you keep walking.

Still doesn't hit that tree line. Keep walking. Can I? No, no, no, no, no, we're in the grass. Past the tree line, you're in the grass, but the grass, you've, it's hard to really gauge since you have no sun in this guy and you don't have a central timepiece of any kind.

Do we feel tired? Well, hold on. Can I spin around and see if the grass we've been trampling on is leaving a trail? No, none. No trail. No trail. It's like you never stepped through behind you.

The grass is parted where you walked through and then looking behind, it's like you were just dropped in the middle of the field. Anything following us. Make perception check. Oh. There was that kid that we talked to. Good call.

Talked to? Deathly eight. There was like a creature in the woods. That you saw. Magical. I saw it. Nothing. Can I check?

Can I present? It was following us. I'm gonna perception check as well, yeah. Vex, do you feel like just popping above the, just getting a little bit of a birdside going really quickly? Perhaps. 14. Glancing about there was just a smooth grass line,

no sign of any of the red make. We're clear. Team Monster. No one's full. What about this? What if, wait. Don't tell her, don't tell, just leave it up here as long as it has to be. Gone, but there's no trees. Just scratch.

I will turn around how far away are we from the tree line? Where you guys left? Yeah. It's visible, but it's quite a ways away. We have been moving away. We're making headway. Yeah, it's just the rolling fields and the hills of this, it are, it's comparable to almost the width of the valley between,

between the Cliff Keep Mountains and the Stormcrest Mountains on Tal'Dorei, it just seems like such a vast space with no immediate, like, scattered landmarks to where in your head, which is used to gauging your position from small changes in the scenery, it's... We're going to die out of you. No, no, no. We have food. We can...

We're on no way. What if this is a week's journey? What if this is two weeks' journey? She said two days south. She said two dusk's south. She said two dusk's south. What if this is a week's journey? is a month.

So she said two days dustword. Two days' duskword. Say two days. But does that mean two days in our... Does that mean two days in a dust or two days that last in eternity? Two days. It's two days. It's two days.

That's all you have. We're fine. Wait, but you were saying she was using two days in a way that we would understand. So we can discern. We don't know. We don't know. She said two days. I'm feeling pretty confident.

I'm not having a lot of stress. having a lot of stress about this. Let's keep grooving. I think we keep moving. We're still walking. Until it's time that we all think it's time to take a rest and we take a nap. Yeah. When we feel tired, I mean, I do want to make sure that nothing's following us on occasion and make sure that nothing is around.

We checked it out. We should we circle back and just double back and make sure that everyone's behind us? No. No. We'll get separated. We'll never find each other again. All right. Then we'll keep going and I'll just keep reading my book on top of Grog.

Do we still see the flashing? light in the distance that she saw? Only at times, because you get kind of, when you go below the hills and these deep valleys, before you come to the next hill line, it kind of cuts off your perspective in the future. But as you get close, go ahead and make another perception check. Vex as you're keeping an eye on the back of Trinket.

Wait, you said Vax. Do you mean Vax or did you mean Vex? Said Vex. Eighteen. 18. 18. The source of the glimmer is becoming larger, but you can't make out any details, and they're actually kind of a few glimmers, clustered.

Okay. And it's one of those things where it's not like a perpetual, but like, right now that you're like, oh, we are heading towards something. I'm not sure what it is. It's an erratic. It seems erratic, yeah. Something's on fire.

It's a party. Press on? Yeah. I mean, what else are we going to do? Definitely know than you. All right. Press on until it's time to rest. Yeah.

All right. You push on four. for a few more hours and trying to think back how long you've been here and the time passes in a strange way to the point where you have no way of understanding really how much time has gone by. But you're starting to get a little tired like you would towards the end of a day's worth of travel. You come up over a large hillside and you can see now there's a base of a mountain range that you can kind of make out a little bit in the distance. that meets up where that flickering is.

And you can see what appears to be, now the source of the flickering, there looks to be some sort of a civilization. There are towers, there appears to be a stone ring around it. It's hard to make out the details from this distance, but it looks fairly large, and it's kind of in the side of the mountain range. I say we can't hear it here. I think it's a lovely idea.

What's around us? just grass fields, pretty much. Just grass fields. Get to the top. All as you can see. As far as you can see, and then the hill line eventually gets so high in the distance where you can't see past it. You see the mountain range and whatever

the source of this glimmer is, this strange city-like series of structures at the base of that mountain range. Yeah, that's like set up, sharp, drop. Can I fly up on the broom and see if I can see anything in the field around us, or? Look for any kind of movement in the grass. Get your hat. Yep. I put my fucking hat on.

It suits you. It's not a thing. I'm going to use my optics to try and sketch what I can of the city for the moment and sort of get a general idea of it sitting down. Okay. Starting to get an idea of it. All right. And does it look like anything from my sister and my memory?

Uh, it's, it's, go and roll a perception check on your end as well, Vax. And me? 20. Not a natural. As you're getting out, sure, I want to make one. You get a better view as well. 25.

25. It's hard at this distance to make out much of the information, especially with the grasping as high as it is and the hill beyond it. For the most part, the folks that can get a clear beat are those that are above the grass line and keeping a keen eye, which Vex is. Oh, whispers, whispers, whispers, whispers. Whispers. in the night.

This is like the anticipation that you feel before you open a loot crate. Not knowing what it could be, could it be good, could it be bad? I don't know. What you do know is that it's $3 off if you use the code critical roll. That's a constant.

Don't try and super sigh in me. Amazing. I got you. Oh, actually. Maybe go, good back. Oh, not quite. Not quite. Maybe the bigger one.

Maybe the bigger one. He's been chewing on that. Yeah, bigger one. In addition to that, do I see anything in the grass around us? From what you can see, there is, every now and then you see just tiny little bits of movement in the grass, maybe a quarter mile to one way. You can see a similar type of winding shape in the grass

a mile or so the other way. It's even further out. There are other things moving in the grass, but not of them are breaking the grass surface. But they appear to be singular, at least, in the shifting and movement. Ooh. You do catch a smaller source of movement in the grass,

no more than maybe 30 feet off from where the rest of your party is currently walking. Can I fly down near it? Yeah. You swoop down and you catch overview of that, and you can see what appears to be a small humanoid that is kind of curling through the grass line. Looks human.

Big, thick, curled beard, very, very coarse, dark hair. A muscled torso, stocky but strong. Would appear to be a light blue vest that kind of covering that part of the torso. Most of the buttons missing, and the bottom of it kind of tattered and worn. The hindquarters themselves are fur. fur and come into cloven hoofs,

and you can see a small pair of horns hooking off the back of the head. This individual is kind of skulking through the grass, carrying what looks to be a small book and a long quill and a hand. And is occasionally leaping up over the grass line, landing, and then drawing something in the book.

Does he see me? Leaping over the grass, he does not see you at the moment. No. You're overhead. I want to float down kind of above him on the broom and like lay down on the broom. What's your drawn? As soon as you come down and whisper,

the tome slam shut, the figure stands up straight, slowly turns the eyes towards you, and you can see kind of the dark and ruddy skin, you know, the kind of sun-touched nose and cheeks, just a darker, more leathered texture to them. But the eyes are piercing ice blue as it looks back into yours. Nothing. Nothing at all.

Just taking notes. On those people up there? Yes. Oh, interesting. Because why not? Why not? You know, you probably could get a better view of them if you were riding on this broom.

You see, if you're worried, it's not me you need to worry about. It's him. And points past your shoulder. I'm not looking. I'm not falling for that. Nope. Can I inside check him and see you? Like an inside check, yeah. I love this place.

I'm not pulling for that. I love this. 16. 16? Oh. He seems like a slippery person in general. Though he has caught off guard and right now is in self-preservation mode, it's hard to really gauge if he's telling the truth or not.

I'm not going to bite you. I don't. I don't. I'm not a bitter. I'm not a bitter, I'm not a bitter. I'm not the biter, and he starts backing up towards the grass. Can I fly down and grab his wrist? Sure, as you go ahead. You grab his wrist and fly up? I need you to go ahead and make a grapple check, so go ahead make an athletics. Oh, okay. I love all of this.

Oh, man. I love it. Athletics or, oh great. Rodeo that's a fucking peter. 15? He pulls away and as you're, As your hand grabs his wrist, he attempts to slip his hand on the fingers. Just pull through from your grass as you double over your other hand and grab them by the elbow.

You lift up and pull them out of the grass field. Now dangling his little feet in the middle of the air. As he's being dragged up, the quill gets dropped and he kind of looks forward and the book is tumbling out of his hand. He grabs the book and just kind of clucks himself. What are you doing? Now I spin around and see if there's anything behind me. There is nothing visible.

Nicely studgy little fuck. Don't BS and BS. Please, this is really high. This is really high. It really is. I think we should go say hi to my friends, don't you? We're in need of company, dear, and we fly down. To everyone.

You drag him down the broom, coasting right over the grass line, presenting you and your new compatrient to the rest of Matamakina. What did you find? Well, look at this friend I just found. I know. Look at you. Horrible.

Dangling from her grasp, for now at the edge. Go, grab him. Gentle, gentle. He did nothing to us. Hey, friend. You look like a smart fella.

Let's have a conversation. Don't talk to him. Do not. What is this? He's, um, what are you? Who are you? What are you? I am, but I am.

a simple wanderer and an individual who enjoys learning about things that are new and different. Squeeze him. Don't squeeze him. Don't squeeze him, Bob. What's your name? Garmili. What was he? Garmili.

Garmili. What are you reading? Garmili. Garmile. What are you reading? Nothing. Nothing. Not the reading.

Just drawing. drawing. Percy. You know, our friend Percival here, you like to draw as well. I did quite a bit. Let's see what this, let's see your work. Oh yeah, compare notes. You guys look out of your grasp, but there's nothing. Just concrete around him. With one of my fingers, can I go like, give him a little tickle? No.

I'm very, I'm going to very gently put my hand on the book. Okay? And take it. It's a very, very finely bound book. The leather is, is, is, is impeccable, it's oiled, there's a brass, metallic trim around the edges of it, and the binding. There is a thick piece of like red velvet strip that is set as a bookmarker in the center of it. May I? Sikl? Oh.

That's the best face ever. Kamili, now I saw what you were drawing and it was quite lovely. Don't you want to share? What's the matter? Are you scared? You might want to tell us what's going on before we figure it out for ourselves. It's your chance. It's really nothing going on. I was just curious.

I'm taking notes. I've been taking notes myself. For what? Yeah, you guys should compare notes. You know, cross-references are always good. You wouldn't understand. You could help us. Should we have that hunk of another's going to help here? The hunk of quall?

It's expired. I'll step forward and put my hand on his shoulder. and say, listen, where... Which, by the way, he's being held up by grog right now. Well, put him on the ground. I'll put him on his toe then. Okay. I'll say, listen, little man.

I'm little too, and you have nothing to fear from us, as long as you just cooperate. I will cast suggestion on him. Nice. And I will suggest that he fully cooperate with us and tell us all he knows. What's the DC? Well, I didn't use the hand cone, did I?

So, 18. No. Big money, no way. Okay. Is the book safe to open? I don't know. As you touching his leg and looking up at him, there's that kind of shimmer of purplish energy in your eyes,

and he kind of gives you a look. Right, no worries, no problems whatsoever, whatever you need. Can I go find his feather quill that he dropped? You don't know that he dropped it? You don't know about the quill. You just know the book that he had. Oh, I thought we... Okay. Tell us, tell us, oh, oh, oh.

Can we open the book? Do you want to try to open the book? I'm asking, is it safe to open for me? Yes, it's quite safe. What's at the bookmark, may I ask? And I slowly start to open it at the bookmark. It's just our I'm currently making notes. Please be nudie pictures.

I'm gently opening it. All right, the picture you come to, as of right now, is a very, very, very, finally detailed sketch of Grog. Very well drawn, but he has bulging eyes, big buck teeth, and it looks to be like a very, very tiny penis. What do you see? He's brilliant. He's captured everything. It's truly spectacular.

What's it? a picture of. It's a little, he's a little, he's a little shithead. Has he drawn us? He's a little pretz. I turn it. Don't kill him, Don't kill him, Brooke.

There's nothing wrong with drawing a funny picture. Art is subjective. Oh man, he nailed you, Broke. What other Goliath has been trooping through this place? Oh, many, many, so many. That's... I'm gonna sell me, Richard. We just are gently flipping through some of the pages.

There are drawings of the entire party, but with like extremely exaggerated, cartoonish parody pictures. For Pike, her head is extremely large. Like Six Flags Magic Mountain character kind of vibe. Yeah, yeah. Like a hint of Mad Magazine.

Yeah, political ad style. Where it's based, there's like just, it's essentially a book full of dick butts. It's just, Just him drawing and vandalizing the image of a number of you guys. Like there's a picture of what looks like Vax and Keeleth that are both just covered and poo

and slapping it on their page. I've written in Elvish, I love this, with a word bubble. It's essentially just like a kid entertaining himself with a bunch of stupid pictures. This is an awfully expensive book to be. to be drawing that in. To be shitty.

So my question is, is this just your hobby, your pastime, or are you an actual records keeper for whatever town this is? Because both would be humorous. No, no record keeper, no for the town. I'm going much earlier in the book to see what's there. You start seeing what looked to be a number of elven individuals. You see people in like really, really nice regal armor, but all of them are like just pooping themselves.

There's a bunch of elvish ladies with just oversized floppy boobs and like smacking each other in the face. It's truly, really childish. Oh my God, he's the best. They're all really well drawn and well shaded. Like there is a serious talent. The artwork, it's just his skewed intent

of imagery is fascinating. Gamile, look. I'm in the mood to hear this guy's life story. Get him to take him to take this. I know. I love them, honestly. I think you're quite talented. They're very great.

Should we make camp here and invite him into the mansion? Oh. Oh. What is the name? As long as he's secure, yeah. What's the name of this little town here that we see? Oh, that, well, that is the, I can tell you that.

They've been here for a little while, and they've been a gracious source of subjects. And where do you live when, saying Gordon's not here. I live wherever I please. I choose my place to rest. And, um. Where do your clothes come from?

Where do you live? The heavenly, friends. I've got family and friends all over. It's not just a wit ways away. So you know this area quite well? I know it well, yes. So you could potentially guide us? Well, it's hard to guide when you're being crushed by a giant,

green, gray man thing. No, I'm just saying, is there anyone that would miss you if you're gone? Whoa! Be nice to our guest. We're in the Fee Wild. I have a deal for you. I have a deal for you.

We could offer you dinner. Dinner. Delicious dinner. Chicken. Have you ever had chicken? It's so wonderful. Chicken.

Yes. Also a bath. If. If. You happen to lead us. where we want to go. Where do you want to go? We'll tell you in a little bit.

Yeah, crack out the door, homie. All right. And to sweeten the offer, after you've had dinner with us and we send you on your way, perhaps we will consider giving you your book back, perhaps. I fly off and I go grab the quill. Make a perception check. Oh, geez.

That would be hard to fucking find. of a tall grass field. Oh, natural 20. Make it into the square. I didn't make it into the square. It was pathetic. 27. Oh.

You spend the better part of the next 20 minutes. 20 minutes. Realizing that there is no way you're finding this quill amongst the grass. I mean, this is the needle in a hay factory. You know, it's on. All right, can I pat it down just for any weapons? Do you have a pad now?

Make an investigation check. Check. Ooh. A little TSA. Is that seven dicks? Like seven. Nine. From best you can find throughout his body, the only thing that catches your attention is a now crushed ocarina that he had on the side of his pocket.

That did not survive the grasping of drugs. We can fix it for it. We'll, we can make you a new one somewhere. Hopefully. Maybe we have that. Give me the bits. Give me the bits. Gron Neely, we have a very bad track record when we make friends. We have been burned badly a few times, and I just want to make it clear that you will be watched while you're here.

Come in, eat, enjoy yourself, but multiple people here are keeping an eye on you. Understand? I understand. Look, if we're to strike an accord here, one of friendly trade of services, I would greatly appreciate it's done without this very handsome muscle about I sneeged right in his face

you see a kind of off his nose without this man trying to smash my innards please Crog let him go but not go just put him down

I can put him down and put your hand on his shoulder let's go are we making camp here shall we get into the house let's hold hands as we walk through the door all right I'll cast

the mansion. I'll just sit down and sing, my house is a very, very, very fine house with chicken everywhere. Life used to be so fair, but now it's better because of me. As you finish the incantation, the shimmering doorway of Scanlon's magnificent mansion

outlines within the grass, feel only emerging about it put beyond the actual tallest part of the grass. You kind of have to bow down and get into it, but you guys all enter, along with your new friend, Garmeli, into the mansion itself. We'll go and take a break there. All right, yeah, yeah, yeah. Back in the game, as you guys find your way into the interior of Scanlon's magnificent mansion, you all the same. Yeah, the individual, the fay creature known as Garmele, nervously walks along with you. What do you wish to do

where an evening's rest is taken? I stand at the door. Let's have some chicken, down it. Definitely have some chicken. Let's just have some food. Let's put two guards on him. I put 20 guards on him. That's a lot of guards.

But the servants just kind of shimmer up next to him and he's like, no. Hello. Guys, let's have a carpet picnic tonight. Can we have a carpet picnic? Let's sit on the floor. Is there a carpet? Yeah, there's a carpet? There's a nice rug.

It's like a nice thick shag. Oh, it is a shag? I just want to just see. Oh yeah. Just a picnic. You know, because we're in the Faye Wild, it seems appropriate. We're not in the Faye Wild. We're not in the house.

We're in the Faye Wild and in the house. You know, I just thought it'd be fun. I would have a picnic with you, Donning. Thank you. I sit down next to the Seder. And I stare at them like this a little bit. Hi. What do we want to know from this little twerp?

So. So. Why don't we eat and we'll get to the questions in a little bit? Let's give him a rest. I kind of shocked him when I abducted him. Do you shed? Uh, a little. Do you grow a thicker coat during wintertime?

Winter, seasons. It's not really a thing here. That's cool. Do you grow horns? I mean, they grew. That's awesome. Do you care for any ale? Yes, please.

All right, I crack out the big ass casket ale. I would like some of that as well, girl. Pass it around. Pass it around. Pass it around. He just sculls it, just... Well, all right, tiny tunes. Nicely done.

Can I just pull Vax aside for a moment and ask, do you want to go to Singhorn? We could avoid it. Well, we know no one here, except for this guy. Right. We need to find you that boat. And I don't relish the idea of dealing with our father again. It seems like our best pet.

Right. Of course. We should go see them. Are you sure you want to go? Of course. Why wouldn't I? Please. And I walk back to the group. I'll give the satyr another drink.

I say. He greedily drinks it down. Can I, can I, like, pat your fur? Is it course? Heleth. You're being, Lee. That's a bit forward. He's so touchy today.

He's. I know, I understand. I just. So, if we're here to talk and make this deal we're discussing, what is you want from me? Is he looking any more drunk? He's looking at least slur.

He's, he's, slith slur. Slice slur. Do not have some more ale as well, Grog? Keep it coming. Keep it coming, all around. Yeah, go ahead. So, honest opinion, how are the, what is the disposition of the people in that city over on the hill? Well, um...

You can be frank. We're not from around here. You can't offend us with your opinion of them. It's a busy place right now. I mean, we haven't seen the city of Singorn in close to 100 years, at the very least, and they have an entire army building up right now, and prices. Really?

Bustle and bustle. They have an army building up. Why is that? Hell if I know. I just wandered through and use that distraction to acquire a few things and make some fantastic notes. Acquire what?

Things. Oh. Do you steal, darling? I don't steal, I borrow indefinitely. Are you just like pinch small things, though? Like little gold trinkets. You're not really This is not really a talent of yours, isn't?

Are we talking like klepto stealing or career? I just take things that look nice that I think I would want and take them. Where do you steal these things? Are you a pickpocketer? I am no simple street thief. I am a procurer of wayward items and objects. that need a better home. I think you should know that this door that you walk through in this big house,

if you steal anything, it shreds you in the ribbit when you leave. Make a deception check. Six. Oh, I'm sure it does, big man. Pat's your knee. It'll disappear if you take it. It certainly will.

Well, good to know. Chicken in your belly goes, then. Try. Look, I'm not, going to take anything from you. We've already proven far more of a mesh for me than I had ever anticipated. And what was meant to be just a simple, fun game

of following follow, has turned into a much more complicated circumstance. So I'd like to get it over with as soon as possible, if you don't mind. Are you not having fun? Wouldn't you at least enjoy yourself? My quill is gone! Oh, I know.

I searched for it. I searched for it. Is that all? Was it a special quill or was it a regular quill? Look, that's sentimental value. I can get another. I just. I'm sorry. What can, what do you want for me?

You want you to take us to this place. Yes. This place, this Merck place. The Shade-Merk. The Shade-Merk. Want to go to the Shade-Merk? Yes. Is it scary?

What are for? Why? It's a very scary tree there. I mean, for us to know. Yes, why? X-Nay on the- Wait, what do you know about the Shade-Merk? Stay the hell out of it, certainly.

Hmm. Okay, a little more elaborate. More than that, friend. Yeah, a little more. Your glass is looking empty. You must know something or else you wouldn't stay out of it. It takes it from you. It's kind of sloshes around.

It's like, it's a dangerous place. It's been a source of vileness and icker here and the faywild. hundreds of years. It's a terrible, horrible, cesspool of nothing. I'm so sorry, this is giving everywhere. Don't worry, the servants will get it. It's terrible because of what dwells there

or because of the plight. Oh, please, not that music. That music gives me nightmares from my childhood. Could we get something a little bit lighter? Some lighter music here. Are you a fan of true crime TV shows? And what about Unsolved Mysteries? The show that jumped started all of our love

of true crime. I'm Ellen Marsh. And I'm Joey Taranto. And we host I Think Not, a true crime comedy podcast covering some of the wildest stories from your favorite true crime campy TV shows all the way to Unsolved Mysteries. Baby, you will laugh, you will cry. You'll think about true crime in a whole new way, and you'll also ask yourself, who gave these people mics? New episodes of I Think Not are released every Wednesday with bonus episodes out every Thursday on Patreon. And every Monday you can listen to our true crime rundown where we go over the top true crime headlines of the week. So come and join us wherever you listen to your podcast.

You know that feeling when you hear one interesting thing and suddenly you want to know more? Well, that's the idea behind my podcast, something you should know. Every episode starts with a question you've probably never thought to ask, like why people do or don't like you, why certain habits stick, or what everyday advice is actually wrong. I'm Mike Hurruthers, and I talk with scientists, authors, and experts, and I keep it practical, surprising, and fun to listen to.

If you've got a curious brain, come try one episode of something you should know. On the podcast app you're listening to right now. Place itself. Both, all of it? What dwells there? Creatures, things, trollish, slime creatures. You're making this up, aren't you?

Do you have drawings? Have you drawn things from there? sketched with you here too. Which page? Flip, flip, flip, flip. Tell us. You take a moment to scan through, and there were all sorts of creatures.

All drawn stupidly, many with extra private parts coming out of shoulders and stuff. How did it even work? Around page 163-4-ish. Oh. And you see, Oh, mealy, you have a dirty month. And there are creatures all throughout,

but at that page in particular, you see what looks to be a lanky tall humanoid that is just oozing kind of a black, thick, like viscous tar. It's shaded in a way where it looks like it has that kind of type of glaze that only thick, oil-like substances really give off. Really is very good well. And it's just dragging this absolutely unnecessarily large dong behind about four feet. feet. It's just every picture looks pretty good to the point. And you're like, oh, really? Yeah.

Yeah. Garmili, that creature, is it very large? No, it's a little bigger than you. Oh, shit. Mm. Just yours and takes us to drink back. Does it have a name? What's this called? Try a lot. I haven't got close enough to it.

Try part. But you know how to get there if you do this picture. I know how to get there, but it's not an easy or not alone safe route. Well, we'll protect you. So are you saying that as part of this agreement, I will be your guide to the outskirts of the Shade Merk? I am not going in there.

I mean, if you want you, look back. Have you heard of a very large, well, I don't know if it's large, a very scary tree there, something poisoning the land? Well, land there is poisoned. I haven't gone near within myself. I'm sure there's many poison trees. How far from here would you say it is?

Day and a half, maybe. Duskward, C-word, maybe? He's been very helpful. Maybe he could just point us in the direction. No, no, we're taking him. We're taking you as far as we can. We need guides who know the land. Then let us make the other side of this agreement.

You want me to be your guide. You'll give me back my book. He says the drink down. Back my book. And it kind of looks at the rest of you. You seem to speak like you know thievery, yes? One of us is a member of a thieves' guild. There's a few things in that there,

dreary, elvish city that I haven't. The skills to procure, but if you wouldn't mind, maybe, borrowing them for me in my stead, well, we've a done deal. Borrowing them indefinitely. Yes, what are we discussing exactly? Queen Pro quo, if you will. I've got no problem stealing from any of those people. Yes, but the devil's in the details.

What are we after? Tell me a little bit more. What are we stealing from? We make the agreement first. Say again? We make the agreement first. I don't try. Well, it's considered a bit of trust. Balls is what that is.

Let us add an addendum then. If we are going to steal things from. you will not only take us to the bog. But you'll take us to our final destination. Nope, no, no Shade Merck, I'm out, sorry. We could just kill you here. Are we killing people? We don't have to kill him.

Oh, do I get to grab him again? No, wait. Remember, you have to be nice to things in the Faywild. This is what we've learned. We have a power of position in negotiation. I'm a master negotiator. No, no, no, no. What is he doing?

Who's getting whispered to me? Oh, shi. Percy? He goes blind again. All right. Every five minutes. This is interesting. 17.

A roll and a rewhisper. What? What? Oh, shit. Very wild. Slippery. Sneaky. This is crazy.

Whoa. Interesting. Interesting. You just said the C word. He said a lot of things. The F word. The G word? The G word.

What? Look, if it's that important to you to go to this dark place, then keep the book. All right, I can draw more. I just... Oh. I've got an idea. Oh.

We broke your ocarina, correct? Yes. Why don't I try and fix the ocarina? We give him his book back. We take a couple things from those people and just get on our way. We could just get on our way. We could just get on a way.

away. We're not have him at all? No, let's make the deal and get this moving. This is like, this is a place where deals happen. Let's do it. Are you usually so like, picky about details? You are. Or if he asked us to steal somebody. We're talking about a pantsless cartoonist in the middle of Fairyland. I mean... We're going to deal. We agree to the deal, he presents it, and then we're there. If we can't...

If we can't steal the things, then the deal is off. Yeah. It's that simple. We both go our separate ways and good luck finding the shade mark on your own. All right. It's Kismet, in my opinion. Well, I trust you, Percy, if you think it's smart. Can I insight check Percy? Because he's acting a little strange.

Same. You can make an insight check, but he's not acting too far out of his normal place here. Yeah, but I've done inside checks before because he's Percy. That's fair. Did you do it? Yeah, but I didn't get anything. All right. I got a 15.

I mean, it's an interestingly tense conversation. It's hard to ride one way or the other, but it's a valid point. If it worse comes to worst and what he's asking for you, you know, is beyond your grasp. What's what you wish not to do it, then the deal is off and you go your separate ways. We're in the fair wild.

We're gonna make a deal with something. Yeah, we've done way worse. This is sort of what the fair wild is. All right, fine. All right. So where you go? I turn a vex. What do you like this idea?

You want to do this? I have no love for that city. I don't care. I kind of want to go there too. The people were stealing from better be meanies, though. And they better have deserved it at some point. Ultimately, I would love to ask them to help us in our fight. Trying to feel better about this.

They're cowardly and stupid for hiding. but we could use their help if they are making a living. Possibly better equipped and better educated than, sorry, than this one here. Well, Garmeli also said they were strengthening up an army. Did they ever have a standing army before? They did. They did? Of course they did.

There's a city. Of course. It wasn't like a huge army per se, but they had trained forces and, you know, they had means of defending their city and... We had a fight instructor when we were growing up. They're elves. They're very civilized. They've all got sticks up their asses. They're fucking elves. I can't wait. I like this one. Are you going to fix his, what is it called?

Give me your ocarina. Let me see if I can go to work on it. I can help Percy. I will inspire Percy by singing. Go ahead, Percy and fixes Akerina. Take your thinking tools and fix his Acarena. You got to put us a whole thing and fix his Acarenna? Hey! Hi.

Hi. Take your D-10. Can I help with a mending spell? I need a glue. Or you can help with the mending spell. Mending spell? Like, can I do it almost like a ritual? Do you have a canstrip?

Do I have a cantrip? I don't know. I thought she used it once before on something. I thought I used it as a, as a ritual spell before. We fixed, you fixed that little doll, that little Sarenreid doll. It's true. Yeah. Right, so you have the spell, correct.

I guess I thought I learned it. I thought it was a Ferdin, I don't know. Oh, geez, here comes the internet. I don't have it now. I don't have it now. Can't have it all times? Can I use it as like a first level spell? What canterps do you know?

Guidance, Druidcraft. I used Druidcraft before, for the wooden thing. Yes, you did. Can I use Druid craft to assist? How would you use Druid Craft in a, What's it made out of? Is it made out of wood? Clay? Clay?

Like natural things? So I'm going to attempt to glue it together, and I'm going to need something to bind it into a holding, like to hold the whole thing together while the glue sets. Okay. So go ahead and you, using what materials are within the workshop that you had before, there is a very mild adhesive paste that you construct. Go ahead and make a tinkering room.

It's due with intelligence modifier. That was a natural 20. Yes, it was. Very rapidly, with the things that are given at your disposal, not even needing the materials here, but what you have on you as part of your traveling tinkering kit, you piece together a nearly unnoticeable binding agent for clay and dirt and earth-based materials.

You managed to fix the o'carina rather quickly in a period of maybe 20 minutes, and with the help of Kila's Druidcraft, dry it and manage to get it fixed. You're instrument, sir. Thank you. One good deed you've done me today. I appreciate that.

Oh, don't forget about all them ails, yeah? Oh. Oh, boy. It's awful. It's awful. It's not a show. I just don't know how to play and say, well, yeah, but yeah. It's quite nice.

I mean, at least you can always draw. I could find my quilt. Quill. I'm sorry. I said I'm sorry. I looked for 20 fucking minutes. I looked. All right? Thank you. I'm sure we could find you a quill. I've got one right fucking ear. I pull the black feather out from behind my ear and hold it up. This is a very fine feather to sweeten the deal. Don't fuck us over. And I slight to give him to the book. Don't give him that, Vax. It's too nice. It is really nice. I know you're acting like he's lying, but he's telling him like a truth. Yeah. Good lie, Crock. I don't know. So it is, Tuna.

We've really been burned. I am really gonna punch you in the back of the head if you fuck us over. Do you understand me? I don't like you. I like you. Yeah. Rest is back.

Well, are we at an agreement? Yes. Sure or not. Me? Who's he shaking? Whoever your leader is, shake my hand. Yeah, give me your fucking hand, you dirty bastard.

Put your wins. Before you got your hand there, backs, Vex put her hand in, and both of you guys clasped both sides of his hand at the same time. Yeah. This is awful. A trio handshake. Weirdly appropriate. It is.

I'm pretty sure he was talking to me, but... I'm pretty sure he was talking to me, actually. All right, so you guys shake hands with him, you feel this like, this kind of shiver on your back as you shake hands, and he kind of smiles. Very well. Now, you've properly gotten acquainted. My proper introductions are in order, and he stands up and he stands up and kind of wobbles for a second, a little drunk on the ale.

Yeah, you want to move. My name is Garmeli. I am a simple joyfinder of the ever-shifting grasses, and I'm happy to be your guide for the remainder of this journey, to the outskirts of the shade mark, and no further. So, three things you wish to avoid

as we progress further. As we are traveling through the moonbrush, alongside the green sea, we could take one or the other, your choice. Eventually, finding our way to the gilded run, and from there, to the Shadmirk itself. So, I'll be leaving you at the outskirts

of the gilded run, but it should suffice for the journey you wish to have ahead. Oh. Things you wish to avoid. One. The hut of Odena. She's a terrible woman.

If you see a hut, don't go. Go. Odena. We may smell enticing things. Odenna. Wodena. Wodena. Whoa, Denner.

Lightful smells, sounds of soft music, a gentle light across the shade and sea. Two words at once, I'm drunk. But not go near the hut. Avoid the hut. No hut. No hut. No hut.

Avoid the last campsite of Sorodoon the happy. Sounds nice. Yeah, that sounds fun. Avoid it. I, trust me. Avoid it. If there's a campsite, it's empty,

looks happy, avoid it. And three, avoid the theater. I love the theater. Oh, that's good advice, actually. Avoid the theater. Just in general, the theater? Just in general, I hate all theater.

Let's avoid the theater, please. I do an inside challenge. Do it. I'm doing it. Wow. I don't know what I have to do. Probably not bad. Terrible. 13. 13. I mean, seems pretty perturbed by the idea of theater. I'm changing my mind on this guy.

What's a critic? What's a critic? Should we avoid the hot? I mean, what does Wodonna do? Got really matter. She's been around the while. She's a hag? Is she a hag? That's a name.

Oh. Best to avoid it. Trust me. We do nothing but trust you. Great, wonders. And who are you, by the way? Oh. We're a voxmacherina.

The slayor steak. The voxmarkingna slayer steak. Very well. A pleasure to meet you all, Voxmarking this layer's steak. He holds a drink out for you to fill again. How many fingers are my old enough? I don't care. I don't care.

Thank you. Thank you. Now, the deal is made. Drinks been had. Introductions have been properly given. I think it's time for bed. He takes two steps before... Face first in the center of the main area and just start snoring loudly. Maybe we should move him to a safe location that we can lock. With those 20 gods, right, Skalin? Sure, he's surrounded. Can I take his Ocarina just for the night? Make a slightly hand check.

Sleep. So do I get advantage or something? Or something? Or something? You slightly hand check. 20. Oh, stop. Where does it goes? That's true.

In a move that would make Vax proud, you pull the upgraded from his grass, show to the rest of the party, and tuck it away. I look over at Vax, give him a wink. And Vex. And Vicks. Hey. Wow.

That was Primo, baby. Hey, thanks. Hey, Kieliff. Yeah. You've got magic. Yeah, kind of. Yeah. I don't entirely trust this thing.

You were told specifically not to trust anything. Do you have any sort of spell that can do true seeing or that can restore him if he's, if he's putting on this form, or that can dispel some charm that he has around him or some form. Maybe some sort of magical thing that he put on me because I'm pretty sure he cast something on me and my brother. Really? What happened? Would you feel? A shiver when we shook his hand.

Okay. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Maybe a jacket. He still, he never told us what he wanted, wanted you to get. What do you wanted to steal? No, he hasn't. Pike, you have something that can reveal some sort of truth? Or dispel some sort of?

sort of magic from him? I actually currently have dispel magic right now. Can we try it? I also have regenerate learned as well. On me and my brother, see if it cancels out whatever he just did. I'll try it.

No, I suppose. I'll touch Vex and cast dispel magic and see if anything happens. Spel magic, all right. You're not wearing anything, wait, wait, wait, take off all all magical items first. Everything I'm wearing is magic. Well, take it all.

Take it all. Take it up! What is it about this? Not like, it makes us get naked all the time. I just don't want, it's like, you know... The hat is not magic, you could leave that on. Thank you. So I take off everything except for the hat.

Yes. I just don't want to, you know, risk to smelling anything. New painting for the mansion. I'm taking a short walk, all right. I'm taking a short walk, all right. Every time I've seen anything attractive and naked, it's gone very poorly today. I'm walking away.

It's like wearing metal in a really hot sauna. You just don't do it. All right, come on. I'm ready. Roll a D20 and add your wisdom modifier. All right, all right. Let me do, let me do, let me do, we'll do the big guy, come on, big guy.

Oh, that's okay. My wisdom, just my modifier. Um, but 22. Okay. You cast the spell. Wait. Do you feel different? Do I feel different?

That's a very high wisdom rule. It's just, do you feel anything? Do I feel anything? You didn't feel anything in particular? No, no, give it a minute. It might take a while to take effect. maybe like do some jumping jacks. I'm definitely putting my clothes back on.

Okay. I mean, I can also try a regeneration spell. Wait, wait, I think I can do something. Really? Yes, I can sing a song. That's mostly what I do. We haven't even noticed right now. You can sing a song and what?

I have a power that I never ever use. It's called counter charm. I can counter charms. as they're being cast, so you still can't use it. Ah. Damn it! I'm going to start gathering the servants to pick the boy up and put him in his room.

And the 20 guards lift this form and carry him off to some side closet. Don't let him steal any of our shit. Everything would disappear. Disappear anyway. No, no, I mean our personal. Lock the door. All right.

Yeah, but what if you can like do Scanlon's thing? where he goes through the door. Well, it's true. I have a feeling if he shook your hand and did something, it's gonna, like Scanlon said, it's probably a pike thing, like a remove curse, or it's gotta be something more like that. Mine is all nature-based.

Okay, well. I can try to regenerate you, but I don't think this would fall under that. She's fine, it was a draft. She used to wear my clothes, it's all right. Do you feel different? No, not anymore. I have a feeling.

It's like if you stray from a contract or something, you might feel it. I don't know. That's what I would think. Yes. I'll go to bed. All right. And I sleep on all of my weapons and stuff, like they're under me on top of the mattress.

Perfect. Everyone else go to bed? I put a blanket over the sater. Okay. Um... Pet him. And I pet them. now that he's asleep and feel, is his fur coarse or is it soft? It's pretty coarse.

Okay. It's really creepy. Now I know. Okay. Good night. I make sure everything's fine and yes. And I will, unless anything has, I will leave him his book, lock the door, and head up to my room and lock the door behind me as well.

Arnie. I stay up all night. all night reading. Again? Are you going to take a point of exhaustion for that? Yeah. I have to. I get very little sleep.

I'm having trouble sleeping. You are? All right, so this is your second level of exhaustion. No, I slept last night. That's right. You did sleep. Correct. So you do take your point of exhaustion now, so you're back to one point of exhaustion.

So all your ability checks are at a disadvantage. How long does that take, usually, to read? A week. It takes a week. I have to remember it. I think it was 48 hours of reading over a period of six days. Oh, geez. Yeah.

Yeah, it's not easy. Oh, close. Yeah, you would be reading. And I'm on day four, I believe. Yeah. I'm up to 36 hours now if this counts as like 10, 12 hours. Yeah. Wow.

So you're close. I'm close. Yeah, you're doing good. All right. You know anything? I sleep, and I dream of fireflies and the fay because it's so magical. All right.

I'm gonna get up early. Okay. But yeah. I'm gonna get up early and try to fix my hair and make it as pristine as I can and try to clean off my clothes and everything before we go into somewhere. I sleep like a baby in my armor.

All right. Percy, as you're ready to go to bed, you feel the strange tickled at the back of your head. Oh, God damn it. Okay. That dissipates. Is it what I think it is? It is the,

The fading of a charm person's. Okay, goddammit. Yeah. The fading of a charm person? Son of all fuck. What's over? And just as I'm going to bed? Or just as I wake up?

Just as you're going to bed. Okay. You would fuck us. Did you fuck us? What? First he was charmed. Oh no, I would, you don't know anything yet. Yep.

I'm not quite gonna go to sleep yet. I'm going to go see who else is still awake. Okay. Scanlan is reading in his room, the door slightly at John. Oh, yes, yes. The little fucker charmed me. I knew it. I suspected it.

That's why I tried to use counter charm, but I don't know how to use it. Apparently, it's some sort of preemptive thing. I have to read about it. Oh, shit, I'm already reading this. Damn it! Anyway, what do you think we should do? I don't know what we can do.

Wait, when were you charmed? What did it affect? What decisions did you make today that were key? We made a bloody deal with him. Well, we can always back out on the deal. I mean, you like it. Well, no, we can't really. Is there some sort of blood pact that we make?

You make a... I don't know exactly how it works. It's just in any book you read about. I only make a deal and it's a deal, and you have to deal with it. What does that mean? You and I could go down to his room right now and just kill him and be done with it.

I don't think that would work. Would we be cursed? Maybe. Haunted forever? Probably. Oh man. That sucks. I want to be haunted.

That's for you and Vax. It would look lovely nightland. No baggage, man, no baggage. What do we do? I suppose we... We made a deal with a devil of some sort. It was inevitable. Is there a way to trick the trickster?

Possibly. Into releasing us from the deal? Could be. Because you know, I'm a sly talker. Hmm. When did this show turn into Rosencranzen-Gildenstern? Right now. Right now.

Now, I'm going to have to tell the others in the morning. I'm going to go see if anybody else is awake. And oh God, sleep wet. Oh, you're reading. Never mind. Now I've got to read about the fucking Faye, too. No. Finish your bloody book. Keylet is at rest.

Vax is at rest. Vex is at rest. Vex is still up cleaning out your garments, you said, right? And Pike, you went to bed, but you're waking up early, correct? Yes. Yeah, so essentially it's just Vex, who's Hicks. Little shit put a charm on me. I felt his wear off about 45 minutes ago. Before we made the deal with him. Yes, around the time he made it in the room.

Parsi, I made the deal because you said it was fine. Well, I... It's fine you didn't know. Well? Well, at least we know that he definitely can't be trusted. It's our own stupid fault. We knew we weren't supposed to trust anything here. I know. We've got to make sure that Pike doesn't give him back.

his whistle just yet, and we have to figure out the way. Why did you want to fix his whistle? You just liked him. He was so nice. You just like. I mean, he was just so nice. Damn it, I thought you knew something we didn't know. I really, really thought you did.

I did. Sadly, what I knew is he's a little shit. I just didn't know till about half an hour ago. I hate magic. Hindsight sucks. I hate magic. Percy? Or.

Change of subject. Hmm. Would you say I look. put together well off with this armor? In what sense? Will you come from money, right? Yes. Right, so do I look like I come from money?

Ah, did she look like she comes from money? That's entirely up to your opinion. You know the attire she wears, you've traveled with her. It's based on what you want to base that judgment on whether it be just pure looks, the person inside. It's whatever person will think. she would be in his eyes. Hmm.

She's naked and a hand. Honestly, dear, you're too happy to look like you come from mine. I don't believe that. No, it's a sure sign of it. It's just an abject misery. Believe me. I can speak to it. You look too much like you, and you don't look enough like something you're supposed to be.

If you feel the urge to deeply bullshit, I'd be happy to help you. It's not hard. No? No. It is easy to pretend you come from money. You just have to be a bit of a shit and wear what everybody else is wearing. Is this have something to do with that city? It does, doesn't it? Who's there? Well, you know, everyone. We were judged growing up, and I don't look forward to seeing that again. Well.

It's not important. I'm... Oh, I disagree. I think, dear, I think that if you're worried about them knowing whether or not you've made your money and made your fortune, I don't think that's going to be the thing to earn their respect. I think you're better off. A, with the company that you keep, and B, with the fact that you're probably just better than most of them. I've known a lot of people with money, and they are definitely not worth you. And besides, if they have something nice that makes you feel inferior, we can just take it.

I like the way you think. Well, and then they're just, you know, shit without anything, and then you're you with their stuff. Thank you, Percy. You're welcome. I know it doesn't really help, but... Please stay at my side when we're there. Yes, yes. And the outfit works. Don't change it. Keep the hat. Good night. Good night. You sleep well.

We sort out this charmed mess in the morning. I'm sorry for my part, I'm not. So you guys go your separate ways. You find yourself eventually to bed as the rest of the group is asleep. In fact, you take a bit of solace in the conversation, finish cleaning your things, though that doesn't seem like the incessant scrubbing you were driven on as much purpose nor the impact you thought of might at this point,

and you resign yourself to sleep for the evening. As the evening comes to a close, Pike, you wake up early, As you come out of your room, you struggle with the view of 20 guards slowly shifting through the foyer as a very hungover and groaning Seder begins clomping through the main foyer going, Uh, breakfast, please. Please breakfast. Yes, yes, follow me to the kitchen. Yes, someone they listen to.

Yes, come. Uh, rubbing his eyes, he follows you into the kitchen. Kitchen comes up on one of the long benches in the center of one of the main dining tables. I put down a cup of coffee for him. And I run into the kitchen and get a very large... Oh, no. What is this? Are you poisoning me?

What's wrong? What is this? It's coffee? I don't like coffee. Oh, what do you want? Something that's not coffee? Okay. Can we get him something that's not coffee?

It's gonna look at it, they're confused, and wander off and come back. A cup of chicken broth. A caraff of like an apple juice. Apple juice will be great, sure. That is familiar, thank you, and just takes the carafe and kind of like. I run in the kitchen really quick

and get a very large piece of butcher paper. Okay. Okay. So, gamelli. Yes. I think you're so, So talented. Oh, thank you.

And I'm just, I wanted to ask if maybe you could draw a family portrait for us, and the most ridiculous you can make it. What do you mean? Just of all of us. I want to hang it above the mantel before everybody wakes up. Well, it's hard to do without seeing the subjects, but I mean, if you want to fill in the details. You fill in the details. All right. All right. Well, I need a quill or some charcoal. Vax gave you a quill last night.

Well, he gave me. A feather has to be refined into a quill. Oh, I forgot. I have. I think there's one in the kitchen. There is no quill in the kitchen. Shit. Kids crowns. But glancing around asking the servants,

There are pieces of charcoal. There is charcoal available. Like sketch charcoal. Okay. Can you use charcoal? Of course, of course. Great. All right.

Have at it. You first? Sure. All right. It's Leonardo and Winslet. Troll me like one of your French girls. You hear the gentle, the gentle, lyrical stylings of Celine Diannswell in the background.

They are creepily beginning sketching your chakry form. I remember very ridiculous. I don't know what that means, but I'll do my best. Yeah. In rapid time, faster than anyone you've ever seen sketch, his form almost becomes blurred with the haste in which he draws. And within the hour, he has completed extremely well-detailed. detailed portrait. I mean portraits. Everyone's standing shoulder to shoulder like a

family above a mantle. And it is grotesque. It's more horrifying. I mean, you look like perhaps the trick-foot's had been keeping the bloodline strong for a very, very long period of time. A droopy face, one eye sinking over the other. It's, it's, you don't even have the right number of fingers. You see Grog in the back, who is as wide as the rest of everybody. just behind them, like this giant wall with this tiny little head, with a tongue kind of lolling up the side.

It looks like he has one fingers, a thumbs up, and the other one's up his bum. In the front, you see Vex and Vax, the twins are just furiously making out. No! Oh, why? The both is just clutching each other. It's terrifying.

Rose! No! Helith is currently clutching the side of a tree, happily and as she does, her eyes are going in a different direction. And the tree itself is like trying to push her off the branch. Yeah. You see Percy, who is extremely tall with this squat, kind of thin head with these giant glasses that make his eyes bug-eyed and strange.

You see a little bit of scruff on the chin that's actually kind of turning into this long, awful, kind of matted dingleberry mess of a goatee. And he has both of his guns pointed out of his guns, He pointed his head going, and next to that is a perfectly defined, unchanged portrait of Scanlon Sharpe. Oh, I just wanted to hear you explain it. Okay.

So I'm gonna take it and put it above, I'm gonna just paste it above the mantle. Okay. And I'm gonna go back to my room to bed. Do you gonna nail it in. I'm gonna go back upstairs in my room. Okay. Eventually you all come to consciousness, brought to the wonderful welcome morning scent

of once again a chicken full breakfast. Find yourselves down to a once again passed out Seder slumped over the breakfast table with what looks to be two plates of mostly devoured chicken mashed potatoes and a couple other side elements. That sounds so good. And there above, on the mantle across the room, is a glorious, glorious sketch of the family of Voxmite.

Charming. Wow. Who changed my... I look pretty good. This is brilliant. Wait, Scanlon, why do you look normal? Does he just really like that? I think we all look normal, actually. That's how I see us, sure.

This picture is disgusting. I love it. Where does that come from? No, there's a lot. awful. You guys, we have a souvenir. We have a souvenir from the Feywild. I love it.

I think he wants a bean. That's what he wants. I flick his head. Hi, hi, hi. Why would you do that when we've been so hospitable? Because it's a gift. It's a souvenir, Brock. Oh.

15. I thought I'd leave you a little. present. I love it. I think it's, well, it's gross, but everybody else looks quite wonderful. I like it. I sit down right in front of the cross the table. I'll guess I don't mind, at least on big. I like it. You guys will cherish this forever. I think it's gross. Of course you do. Eat up and we'll be on our way. I'm just gonna, if you just notice this is kind of the tension from purse, see, wrong. No, no, no, no, not yet. Not yet. Just so

all cards are on the table. We know that we agreed to a deal last night. Despite your charm spell on me, which was, uh, wait what? Defending myself as was warranted. Fair play. Where did you chart?

You got John's spell. I do think we should inform you though. We may have used a little magic on you. Sorry. Just to make sure the deal was solid. I'm certain that that was a necessary precaution. Well, the deal stands for, as it is at the moment, I suppose. Wondrous, I'd hoped as such, because we have much to gain.

So. Oh yeah, no, he charmed me. He put a charm on me last night. Not a feeling. So you no longer think it's a good idea to enter into this agreement. Well, a little late. It is a little late. You never told us what you wanted.

No, he hasn't. I'm going to show you. You're going to walk us right in. Oh, boy. Something like that. Well, what are you going to do? What are you going to do? Just spitting his legs again, you know.

You fascinate me. Good. That's how the first time I've heard that. Friend, I applaud your cleverness. I'm excited by this deal, and I just want to let you know. know that God forbid something comes up where I'm come from, the world I come from, the world I come from. I am possibly the worst person you've ever met.

And I think I kind of hope, not necessarily to hurt you or harm you, but I hope that one day that you can know just how awful I can be. Mediation check. Where is my? 17. Oh, hi. Hope it never comes to that.

Let's hope. I can make addendums to the art piece if you're unhappy. I love the art piece. Actually, since we're on the subject, have you ever drawn yourself before? Well, many times. I'd be curious to see one of your self-portraits. Are they in the book? No. I didn't think.

so. Self-reflection is not one of my favorite pastimes either. Anyway, what are you looking for in the city? That's shown. As part of the agreement, it'll be unveiled upon arrival. How good to me? That's not sneaky at all. I fully trust you. Great. Now, finish your food. Much to do. Much to see. Much to take. I hate him now. No. No. No. No. You don't have it. You don't have it. You don't have it. What are you playing?

Do not abuse this. That's right. What are you doing with your hands? Where did what? Where did what? Where did what? They give it and they take away. Bless the small print.

11. Eat well. And he kind of makes his way towards the door and the guards stop him there. I'll just sit here then and sits in the floor waiting for you guys to finish me. Waiting for you guys to finish. What sort of magic did you cast on us? What do you mean?

What was the deal we agreed to? What will happen if it breaks? Deals are meant to be kept. Should you go against a deal that you've made, especially in here, these realms, there are consequences? Yes. So don't stray from the deal. I think it's just a deal.

I just think deals may be a big deal here. Hmm. So we can still kill it? I don't know. All right. I think if it comes to it, it's possibly. I don't want to test that. What happened to don't hurt or touch anything in the field?

Well. Yeah, we fucked that up, didn't we? Do it. Can I take out? I don't want to kill him. I simply picked a flower. Ocarina. Yeah.

Just play a couple notes while I'm looking at him. Like dead stare. Performance check. That's the thing. Performance check? It's a thing. You're definitely the right person to be doing this. Yeah, right.

13. It's as if you can play an Nocranio. 13. Like anyone. In a very rudimentary kindergarten recorder. Hot crossponds. Hot cross buns. You know.

Do do, do do. It's a little shaky, but you get the hang of it. It's the only sound in the room. It's just dead quiet as you just do this in the middle of breakfast. With food being brought to the table. That is amazing, Mike. Mike? Well, I just...

Move over Scanlan. Holy and Holy. Hell, that was good. That was good. I mean, I, I, I learned once. I don't know. I don't think I've ever seen anyone play an instrument that well. Wait, hey, this is my house. Oh, you know.

Oh, let her know. Well, look, the Seda sad. What's the matter, friend? She has my ocarina. Oh, you're a little. Oh, that's terrible. You bad. Poor guy.

You're clever, I'm sure you'll be fine. Maybe we'll give it back. to you, but I know what you did to my friend with this little thing. So I'm not going to give it back to you. Not just yet. Eat your breakfast? All right, let's go. Damn, that fine prints.

Somebody get this poor asshole a handkerchief. He looks so sad. So, so, so. You just kind of sit there and pouts. As you guys finish your meal, laughing and enjoying yourself. As he pouts, I drew it crap a little flower crown for him. for him. He.

He somehow recedes even further into his grumpy self. His neck disappearing as his head pulls into his torso. He's so fond of mess with. We are really shit in making friends. Really, really shit, Eddie. I don't eat the friends. I know. So I'm curious while we're eating.

Would you happen to tell us what our first objective might be? He's going to show us. I think it's time to make our way in. Yeah, I'm full. Let's do it. I'm gonna walk over to Scanlan. Scanlan. What?

I'm gonna give this to you. The Macarena? Yeah, because I'm just, I don't like performing. You're really good at it. That's a lie. You don't know. Take this and maybe you could charm some people with it. I don't know if that's what it is, but I don't want him to have it.

I thank you. I will, I'll try my best. All right, let's go. I can't believe I wasted a natural 20 on his little. Sorry, I'm good. You guys finish your breakfast. The guards come with you and escort you and your ally outside the door.

As you exit the- Wait, wait, wait, take and roll up the painting, the charcoal drawing that he did, and put it in the bag of holding. Oh, very good. Okay. It's gonna disappear as soon as we take it out. I know, we put it in the... Leave it in the mansion.

That would stay in the mansion. Oh, yeah, that's actually right. It's from the mansion, so it'll stay in the mansion. Will it stay in the mansion? It won't bam out? You've tried taking things out of the mansion, and they've turned to just dust. Yeah, but I don't. But I know things will also get ejected from the mansion.

I don't think it was brought in. It was from the mansion. No matter what happens, I'll leave it. I'll leave it. No matter what happens, there will be a good picture. Put it back up. Yeah. All right, no worries. It's a good lesson.

As you guys, exit the mansion, the dusk light of the sky has not changed. You'll get the idea here, at least since you've arrived, that there has been no movement in the sun. You haven't even seen the sun. The light source of dusk beyond the distant mountains and horizon is just stuck in the dusk hour. With the threat and curl of midnight in the opposite direction, the dark blue

just coming over the horizon unmoving. It also is raining gently. There is a rather heavy cloud that has come over, and it's not a terrible downpour, but like a gentle rainfall has been here for a while, and the floor between the grasses is quite slushy as you step out. Let's go to the city. You go away to the city?

Bex, should we be dressing for the occasion? Should we put on our nice cloaks? We do have nice cloaks. I think I'm gonna be sneaking in to steal things. No, no, no, there's no way we could sneak in. We're gonna go in and make introductions and get settled and then figure out what the fuck we're doing. Oh, okay.

Hmm. Oh. Yeah. Cloak me. With what? My and our nice cloaks. Oh, we have our nice. He has some fancy cloaks unless he's used them all.

Do you have any left? Am I still made of wood, by the way? No. I have it with the nice rest. Bugger. I do have your fancy winter stuff. It's raining. It's raining.

It's not like Hawaii rain, it's rain, I would assume. Yeah. It's not chilly but cold. It's not freezing. It's not. I know. Try and look like I made some sort of effort. some sort of effort. All right, Keyleth gets a cloak.

Do you want some nice? Oh, yes. Okay. Yeah. I'm not changing anything. Cool my hood up. Okay. How long will it take to get to the city from where we are?

A few hours maybe. I'll craft something to keep the rain off of us. Yeah, I'll just do a little kind of cantrip gust over top of us to make those air umbrellas that would never work in real life. but, you know, like that. You guys have to get kind of close together to do it, but it's doable as a cantrip.

So she just kind of keeps this general revolving sphere of wind above that scatters most of the rain to the sides. Cool. For the most part, Groggy still get pretty damp, just give your size and difficulty. But most everyone else can stay pretty dry as you cluster together, walking through the grass. You traveled for another hour or so before the grass

towards the outskirts of the mountain and the city begins to slowly subside. It grows thinner and shorter, and you come to what looks like a bit of marshland almost. Treadless. Just open marshland with little bushes and clusters. Anything you guys want to? Perception check.

See if I can see anything like moving ahead of us. Yeah, except for check. 29. Okay. As you guys begin walking into the marsh, you can see there are areas where it's elevated mud, patches where it's just very, very, very shallow water, maybe an inch at most. And there are a few different areas that get noticeably deep and murky. And you watch to avoid those elements. You're not sure what might be beneath of anything, but you just naturally move through this terrain carefully. You do notice that occasionally upon this walk, you see what looks to be little different from the rest of the rest of the rest of the way. As to the bushes and a piece of train, these deep blueish purple sprout leaves almost, like carrot tops.

These kind of very leafy like plant top emerges in places, occasionally clusters of two or three. And there are not, aren't a lot of them, but many of them occur throughout the lock in this swampy landscape. Garmilly? What are these? Oh, these are best to be avoided. They're mandrake. Just don't disturb them. Don't pull them out. Don't do anything with them.

Mandrakes? Oh, cool. Let's not. Let's leave it. No, I've read things about those. That's just a thing. It's just a thing. Should I read it? It's a pot in screaming baby.

Leave them. So you've... That's left to the side. You guys make your way through the marsh and occasionally passing by the mandrake tops until it begins to subside with the marshland itself and you come towards the base of the city before you. Now you see a massive ivy-covered wall of jade-like stone

surrounding a dense cluster of towering trees, unlike those in any of the surrounding forests is the one you left. It is just an open plain. and then within the city walls, there are just trees emerging many, many stories into the air. Trees that you guys recognize have always been there. These trees came with the city, and they're actually from the Vernet Expanse, where Singhorn usually resides.

As you walk closer, you can see large sealed gates every so often along the outer wall. Every so often, you see these gates embedded in the wall housing a massive emblem of a crescent, moon flanked by two trees over a deep cerulean stone about two feet across. Twins, you know these as the threshold crests. These are the enchanted crests that enable the city to travel back and forth between the Faye Wilde should it be necessary. They're powerful, and they're rarely utilized, as the journey is not always accurate. Seemingly did so this time. Make perception check, guys. Everybody are just the twins?

Everybody who's paying attention. I'm not. I'm reading. This is not woods anymore. This is not forest. 21. Just past marsh and they're like flatland. 20.

21. 21. 15. Okay. You guys continue towards the front of the gate. There's nobody on the outside of it. outside of it, it's just a solid outside city. You can see white and gray towers spires that streak up from inside, some of which are entwined by trees that kind of wrap around

the base and then cluster around the center of the tower's height, like its own kind of canopy belt, if you will. As you get even closer still, you can see the white walls themselves are emplaced with almost heavy gold and redacted. brass, like gold leaf edging across the top, and in each one of the various nooks where the walls, the solid stone walls are adjoined. This is a very, very intricately carved and well-crafted wall, probably as part of the enchantment that is placed on it amongst others to keep it defended. You get about 100 feet from the wall for you, Vex. Here, a quick sound. You leap back instinctually, as all of you guys watch, a series of bolts and arrows

across the floor right in front of you. Oh, boy. That's exciting. We all stop in place. Should we attack? I look up on the wall. Is it coming from archers on the wall? You can now see up on the wall dozens of figures atop with long bows and some with crossbows, drawn and knocked, trained on all of you. I take my hood down.

Say you know us. We're here to see my father. So pause. And they're still like 100 feet away from you. One of the voices says, Who is us, if I might ask? The twins, Vexoria and Vaxildon. Sildo's children.

Just a bit of a conversation. You see a couple figures disappear from behind the wall. About five minutes pass, and as you guys get a little fidgety or one of you makes a swift movement, you can see the drawn bows tense up, and they're trained on any movement you guys give at this moment. As the time passes, an individual steps up at the top of the wall, adorn in the similar Singorian armor, but the helmet is taken off, and you see a woman with deep crimson hair braided to one side and shaved on the other. Cool. And Adorn Aramon, she steps up and looks out.

Vexalya, Vaxildal. Do we know who she is? The Vassar twins return. Do I know why? What is your business here in Singon? Came to speak to our father. And the rest of your company? Our companions. We're with us.

We get persuasion check, both of you. Fourteen. Come forth to the gate. Relieve your arrows. please, and the guards I'll take their bows off of you and release the tension and the strings and the woman turns and steps off the wall again.

You can see the very front gate, the front of the wall opens ever so slightly, about a five-foot gap left. Just everybody let my sister and I do the talk for a minute. Thank you. I scoop up my sister's hand just down by my side, Walk forward. As you guys watch single file continuing towards the city, your Seder friend stays in the very back behind you.

Kind of like clutching. As you glance back, Rogg, he's not there. Who's not there? Who? What? Can he still feel him? Oh, sorry. Can I reach down to where he was?

Still talking about he's holding on to you, but has... Has lost visibility. You love a little spider monkey. As you guys approach, they're waiting on the side of the gate within are about ten guards and this individual, which you, she looks a little more battle-hardened and wasn't elevated before, was just one of the guards when you were children. But this is Iova.

Iova. Ayova. No, watcher Iova. The watchers which guard the wall. guard the wall. She appears to be of an elevated status within the watchers of Singorn. As you approach, she lowers her head in a respectful bow, but still not breaking eye contact and has an aloof and distanced expression. What are I over? Nice to see you have elevated yourself.

Time has passed since you were finding your own path. Surprised to see you return here, especially so far from the material realms. Then you can imagine there is great cause for us to be here. Is your father aware of your arrival? No. He is now. So, you and your guests will be watched, will be followed, until otherwise given proof and permission

from individuals higher than my station than this city, preferably your father. You expect nothing less. No. Go. And welcome to Singorn. And she turns around, puts her helmet on, and half the guard walk away while another six remain behind, just keeping watch.

Interesting. Not quite a warm welcome. I wouldn't expect one. I guess we should probably make our way straight to so we can have free rain. I motion for the rest to come up behind. have come up behind you. As the rest of you approach and find your way

within the city walls, you're met with an astounding cityscape. Hundreds of homes and buildings and sanctuaries formed with natural grace and keen architectural mind as to seem almost grown from the trees and earth themselves. Upon closer look in a nearby inspection, you can see the craftsmanship from a distance. It's almost like they were born from the materials

than they were built or crafted. You can see a distant, magical lantern light shines all across the city, like the start of a glittering snowfall, as the rest of the streets themselves are ever lit by these little shining beacons. The center of the ageless place is divided by a grand lake of pure blue water, a roiling mist drifting across the surface, obscuring the view of boats currently on the surface, the water. You do notice a large military presence within the city as the armored guard of Singorn, these individuals, the armored military force,

owners the Verdeen Guard, are walking throughout the city, not with a hurried pace, but there is a general tension in the air and far more than you've ever seen in all the years that you did spend in your youth within Singorn. And that's where we'll finish our session. The world of Sonic the Hedgehog has been thrust into a not-so-dark, not-so-stormy, hard-boiled detective story that probably

nobody saw coming. Follow Sonic and the Intrepid Chaotic's detective agency as they take on their biggest case yet. This high-flying action-packed adventure will take them across the world, fighting for every quill they can fight. It's one heck of a tale, which is good,

because this story might be the only thing that can save their lives. Well, if that's all, I can just dispose of you. Wait, what? All will be revealed in. Sonic the Hedgehog presents the Chaotics Case Files. Listen now, wherever you get your podcasts. When the Chaotics are on the case.

It's ticklish business anywhere you look at it. Come on, we'll stick together. Love movies? Love classic movies? So do we. Ticklish Business is the podcast where classic film is discussed in modern times. Hosted by me, journal as Kristen Lopez and my co-host, author Emily Edwards, we dive into the golden age of

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